#also sorry anon for taking so long to answer this. i know this issue is personal to you so i didnt want to rush an answer

[rewritingcanon]

Hi, I know I'm over a week late and all, but I couldn't leave it be cause this subject is really a sensitive matter to me for tragic personal reasons. I want to say that the reason you don't remember James ever "continuously asking Lily out; sexually harassing Lily; always asking her out and not taking no for an answer" is not because it's been a while since you read the books and forgot, no, it's simply because is DOESN'T HAPPEN IN THE BOOKS! PERIOD! It's not CANON and it boils my blood to no end when people make shit like this up and make such grave accusations when anyone owns the books and can check on their own that this did NOT happen in them! I dare anyone to bring forth any passage from the books that says any of that! The more they insist that this is canon, the angrier and more offended and hurt I get! I'm endlessly sorry about anyone's personal experience with such crimes (if I wasn't clear enough, I'm unfortunately familiar with them, too) but that does not change simple facts of what happened in the books, what IS and what is NOT canon and it's not an excuse to spread lies so insistently and passionately. Either this is willfully spreading lies or, and I will give benefit of the doubt, it's just people confusing canon with fanon after being in fandom and reading fanfics too much, in which case I would suggest rereading the books and brushing up with the canon knowledge, before spreading such harmful and hurtful rhetoric :/

hi, thank you for this ask and i’m sorry for what you’ve had to go through as well. yeah, i haven’t heard anyone contradict what i said in that post so i assume it was just something the fandom made up. i’m sure ace just confused fanon with canon— no victim would purposefully be spreading lies like that even if they did hate james because they would know how serious sexual abuse is having gone through it themselves. plus i’ve seen them complain about the same things with what some marauders fans say about snape, so i’m sure they didn’t do it on purpose and their intentions were good. but i won’t put it past other people in the hp fandom/snapedom to use it as a bandwagon to continue shitting on james without doing their due diligence and checking if something as serious as that is true or not.

i do agree that people need to be more focused on what is canon and what isn’t, especially with the harry potter fandom since its so large and very removed from a lot of its content, and especially if they are in the snapedom and the marauders fandom, because both fandoms seem to get the most carried away with their characters in my personal experience. i’ve seen people throw around creepy allegations at many characters and it really hurts and annoys me too, even if those characters are considered nasty. it’s one thing to say something like “[x] canonly likes porridge” (who cares in this instance) or “[x] is canonly gay” (annoying and probably ignorant but also whatever), and then say “[x] canonly sexually harrassed [y]” (….helllo??? cant speak for everyone but its definitely offensive to me lol). sometimes concentrated sub-fandoms may be a little like echo chambers so its good to brush up then and again on certain things. its good to interrogate people’s opinions and challenge them. you dont have to comment or reblog (i know i don’t…. usually 🧍‍♀️) but it can keep you from falling into repeating things that just confuse (or worse, hurt) people more.

[myfictionaldreams]

I have such a specific idea for poly marauders so please bare with me .

James and Sirius were out to a fancy party and they come home early to see reader and remus having sex in the kitchen , remus has her spread on the table while he fucks her and she arches her back and sees sirius through blurry vision and calls his name, remus doesn’t notice them so he thinks shes calling her other boyfriends name “ wrong boyfriend sweetheart “ so he fucks her harder until she calls his name “ there you go love”.

You could continue this however you would like Maybe james and Sirius join them. I also love the idea that after everything when they’re showering she reassure remus and says something like “ it’s hard to think of anything else when I’m around you , you’re all consuming “ and the boys agree THATS SO CUTE.

I’m so sorry that this is long and graphic.

Say My Name // Poly!Marauders x Fem!Reader

A/N: Whoever you are, anon, I thank you for giving me this request because, holy shit, it has turned me (and Remus) absolutely feral, and I have no regrets.

Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, fluff, werewolf troupes, feral remus lupin, dom/sub undertones, possessive sex, size difference/kink (!), praise kink, dirty talk, self-confidence issues, gentle touching/kissing, rough oral sex (f receiving), rough sex, overstimulation, table sex, manhandling, multiple orgasms, crying, body worship, anxiety attack (nearly), restraints, blindfold, begging, aftercare :)))

Words: 5.7k

my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link

“You both look so damn handsome!” you admire dreamily with a thick lace of sarcasm as you tighten the burgundy scarf around Sirius’ neck. The mischievous glint in those twinkling grey eyes brightened as he rolled them in jest, matching the doting smirk on his full lips. “Maybe you should forgo the leather jackets more often for the waistcoats”, you say with a lustful undertone to your words as you look up at him through your lashes.

“Hmm, you think so?” he asks, dipping his height ever so slightly so that he could press his lips to yours in a surprisingly gentle kiss that still managed to pull desire in your abdomen as you leaned in for more but whined as he stood back to full height and straightened the waistcoat you loved so very much.

From behind you at the entrance to the bathroom, James was attempting to knot his bowtie when he wondered, “Are you sure you both don’t want to come with us? We each can have a plus one, which means there’s room for two. We don’t mind being fashionably late”. Glancing over your shoulder, you took in his slick attire that also caused warmth to bloom beneath your cheeks. A simple black jacket shaped perfectly for his slim waist, a crisp white shirt beneath and a matching shade of burgundy to Sirus was the colour for his tie.

The matching colours were an idea of Remus’, who was lounging across the mammoth bed, his long legs stretched out beneath him with one ankle crossed over the other. He watched James intently, the corner of his eye twitching at the messy-haired Marauder's attempts to tie his bowtie.

Remus stood and approached him, batting away James’ fingers as he began to do the job for him. You watched them fondly before answering the unanswered question. “No, it’s ok, James. Remus and I have a lovely night filled with a romantic home-cooked meal and a fancy bottle of wine. Who knows where the night may take us? Might end in some lovely… hand holding”, you say with a simple shrug to your shoulders, returning to straightening the already pristine waistcoat of Sirius.

“Oh yeah? Some strong hand-holding, Moony, is that what you’ve got planned? You might need to up your game”, Sirius jokes under his breath as he watches your fingers closely with a dipped head.

Remus snorted, smiling to himself, knowing that your night would be filled with anything but hand-holding, especially as the hours ticked closer to the following day. It was approaching the full moon, not tomorrow but the next day, but that didn’t matter as the changes were already beginning to affect Remus, and it all started with his desire for possession.

The wolf in Remus took a keen liking to you, even from all those years ago when you met the Marauders on the train to Hogwarts. It was an obsession, a need that devoured him completely to be with you. It had been described to you like a mating. Remus’ wolf thought you were his mate; therefore, as the gap between Remus’ and the wolf’s mind thinned with the full moon, the desire would take hold of Remus. There was still the deep, adoring love that he held for James and Sirius, and thankfully, this stopped him from ever deeming them a threat against your love, but others? Well, that’s where the danger lay, and therefore, it was easier for everyone if you and Remus stayed in for the night rather than have a territorial wizard with werewolf anger in a room full of people.

“Remember to please be safe out there tonight. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, and for the love of Merlin, James, please don’t drink and fly again. I’m not having another incident like last time”.

“Yes, Mum”, James grumbles sarcastically as Sirius chuckles under his breath.

“I’ll make sure that Prongs is on his best behaviour”, Sirius reasons with you as his hands come to rest around your waist, pulling you ever so gently closer.

“Good”, you say promptly, whilst curling a piece of his long hair around your fingers before reaching up to kiss his lips with a fierce press. “You look so handsome tonight,” you try to praise him as your mouths are still kissing together.

“Don’t I always?” he responds cheekily, earning a half-hearted eye-roll as he eases away, swapping places with James so that he can say goodbye to Remus and James with you.

Your fingers automatically try to tangle through James’ hair, attempting to flatten out the messy strands, but after a couple of minutes of attempts, James tugs you by your wrists. “I don’t know why you even bother; you know my hair will just stay messy. Anyway, doesn’t it add to my roguish good looks?” he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively as he gives you a broad grin whilst kissing each of your palms.

Your fingers cup his freshly shaved cheeks, caressing the smooth skin as you say, “I hope you have fun tonight”, whilst leaning up on your tiptoes to kiss him with as much vigour as you could hear from the groans across the room with Sirius and Remus.

James sighed into the kiss, one hand matching yours by resting along your cheek and the other on your lower back as his lips pecked across your face until hovering next to your ear. “If you need us to come back, just send a note as we taught you; two flicks of your fingers and it should disappear, and we’ll come back straight away”.

Nodding your head in understanding, James kissed your cheek quickly before standing up to his full height and looking over at the other two men. “Sirius, take your tongue from Moony’s mouth; we must go!”

You tried to stifle your laughter as the two men pulled away from each other with rosy cheeks and wet lips.

Sirius and James disappeared with a flurry of green fire through the flu network installed in your shared home's kitchen. Remus turned to you with a heartwarming smile as he asked, “Shall we put some music on and start with dinner, love?”

You left it in Remus’ capable hands to find suitable music on his record player, and it ended up being a medley of David Bowie, which you were always happy to listen to. The two of you worked in unison to cook a beautiful roast dinner, moving around one another without getting in the way but making sure to remain at arm's length. Lingering touches to arms or backs, sipping slowly on the bottle of wine as Remus sang along to Bowie under his breath. You’d told him he could sing louder as you wanted to hear him, but he simply smiled and kissed your cheek, like he was embarrassed at being caught, but it was a rare day where Remus Lupin was embarrassed about anything.

The dinner was beautifully cooked, and there was enough for many more people than just you and Remus. Soon enough, you were stuffed full, thankful for deciding to wear a loose dress today with your expanded stomach. Remus was still eating as you sat and slowly digested your food, talking idly about fond memories from Hogwarts and how your work had been this week. Just anything domestically happy that the two of you could as you shifted closer in your seat so that his large scarred palm could rest on your thigh and your fingers interlock over the back of his hands.

“It’s a rare time when it gets to be just the two of us”, Remus muses, his hand squeezing your fingers and thighs as he pushes away his empty plate, his eyes solely focused on you.

“It’s been nice. As much as I love having all four of us together, sometimes it’s hard to keep up and give each of you all my attention, so when it's just one-on-one, it feels so intimate, wouldn’t you agree?”

His eyes softened as he nodded, “I definitely agree. You look so beautiful tonight, by the way. Have I told you that?”

Warmth filled your cheeks as you looked away to the glass of wine in your other hand. Even after all these years, one small compliment from Remus felt like the world, and it wasn’t the first time he had said that tonight; he’d said it every other sentence, but that didn’t hinder the giddy feeling from spreading in your chest.

“You, Mr Lupin, are a smooth talker”, you say, drinking a sip of your wine, ignoring his growing smile. Placing the glass onto the table, you shifted closer to Remus, resting a hand on his chest as you realised how much time had passed over the night. “So pudding, what would you like? I think we have some ice cream in the freezer, or if you’re lucky, James would have left us a couple of slices of his mum’s cake from yesterday”.

Remus didn’t answer immediately as you realised he was just silently watching you with the beautiful twinkle back in his eye, a curve to his lips that you itched to caress with your thumb. But then, he shifted forward in his seat so you were only mere inches from your faces touching, and the soft flop of his mousey brown hair fell into his eyes. “You’re so pretty, Remus”, you admire and then hold back a giggle as his cheeks flare with colour at your compliment.

“Pretty and scarred”, he muttered in response, cupping your wrist and bringing your fingers to his lips so he could kiss them carefully.

Your automatic response was to shout at him. It wasn’t that he had said anything remotely negative, but you knew the self-conscious thoughts that laced his words that he rarely spoke but still thought. You wanted to remind him of the hundreds of times he had ever scolded you for making negative comments about yourself or any self-doubt. Still, if you did, you knew it would ruin the positive mood for the night, so you wanted to continue with words of affirmation.

Closing the gap between each other, you kissed the tip of his nose whilst cupping both cheeks, paying specific attention to the thick pink scar that ran down from his temple, over his brow and his cheek. “I love you, scars and all”.

Remus’ tension seemed to ease from his shoulders as he breathed lightly out of his nose, his face lowering to rest on your shoulder as you held him for a moment before he began to stand and offered a hand, “What about a dance m’lady, then I’ll find you something sweet to suck on for desert”.

Ignoring the innuendo, you grinned up at him, placing your hand into his much larger palm. James and Sirius had lessons growing up from their families on how to dance for special balls they were forced to attend. You and Remus, on the other hand, were utterly clueless, but this only added to the joy and laughter as you both clumsily tried not to step on the other's toes or twirl without knocking into furniture.

You’d laughed so hard that a stitch formed in your side, causing the vivid dance to settle into a light sway. Your head rested on Remus's shoulder as his cheek pressed against the top of your head, arms around your shoulder as he lightly sang the next Bowie song.

Everything was perfect, especially as his rough fingertips danced up the nape of your neck, carefully tipping your head back so that you were now staring up into his kind eyes, his lips no longer moving along to the lyrics as he licked them carefully, moistening them before dipping his head. The kiss was as gentle as his hands now cupping your face, and you wondered for a moment if you were lightheaded from holding your breath in anticipation or from the effects of having your boyfriend kissing you.

Remus was soft, lovely and perfect as he eased away to put a gap between your mouths, but only so that he could adjust his position by keeping one hand on your jaw and the other around your waist before taking your breath away once more. Instantly, your body rose to the tips of your toes to be closer to him and firm the kiss.

The breath you’d both been holding released, noses pressing into each other's cheeks as the warm air tickled your ears. His tongue teased the seam of your lips, and as you relaxed into the kiss, many things seemed to happen at once.

The grandfather clock in the living room chimed midnight, and the soft Remus you’d been carefully kissing and exploring with your lips was now firmly gripping the back of your thighs, lifting you whilst simultaneously stepping towards the table as you squealed in shock, desperately gripping his shoulders for support.

Plates and glasses smashed onto the floor as Remus shoved aside the lovely table setting so that there was a firm blank canvas for you to be led on.

“Woah, Remus, just give me a minute.” You try to reason with him to at least get your bearings. Having been standing up two seconds ago, you were now led on your back with your boyfriend having become frantic with his actions. His shoulders shook with restraint, and his eyes didn’t lift from the edge of your skirt as he reached for the material. Not only this, but the brightness in his eyes had one, replaced with sinful hunger.

“Need you-” he muttered with a gruffness that hadn’t been there moments ago.

This was why you’d decided to stay in. Sometimes, Remus would curl around your body with the need to simply just breathe you in and declare that you were his; he’d become somewhat feral.

The fire in your body scorched to life as the need seeped into your core. As lovely as it had been, seeing him like this just did something to you. You wanted him just as desperately.

Frantically, you tried to help him lift up your skirt, but he was in control, pushing the material and tearing it in places with his firm grip until your legs and underwear-covered pussy were revealed. For a moment, it looked like he was going to dribble as you tried to reach for him to tell him to take a breath and compose himself, but all you were able to do audibly was scream out, head tipping back as Remus devoured you.

The Marauder hadn’t even waited for your underwear to be removed before his mouth was on you, hands not-so-gently wrapping around your thighs to push your legs apart, the slippers you’d been wearing now flying off in different directions across the kitchen. It was like he’d not eaten a single thing all night with the way his lips and jaw moved against your most sensitive of areas.

The sensation was odd with the barrier of cotton in between your cunt and his mouth. All you had was the pressure, wetness beginning to soak through from his tongue and the overwhelming heat from his mouth. Remus moved hungrily, licking and caressing with his mouth as you lay with your arms gripping onto the edge of the table above your head.

“Rem-Remus! Merlin, please don’t stop!” you begged desperately, allowing your body to succumb to his touch. You couldn’t even open your eyes without feeling dizzy with the sensations of his body all over your lower half as he pressed his tongue firmly against your throbbing clit, circling it with intention.

The hands on your thighs pushed harder, giving his face more room as a deep groan burned from his chest as he needed more. Still, as you whimpered from him to not stop, he stayed in place, stimulating your clit over and over again until your body was tensing with the pulses of desire from your cunt as your orgasm erupted.

His motions continued through the waves of pleasure, and even after, he carried on with his devouring, even as you verged on the edge of becoming overstimulated from the rough material of your panties rubbing against your delicate area. Remus needed more, and he was ready to take it.

The pressure on the back of your thighs suddenly disappears as he drapes your legs over his shoulders, giving you a better angle now to reach down and run your shaky fingers through his soft hair.

With your eyes firmly closed, you hadn’t noticed that your underwear had been torn clean from your body, only noticing when there was no barrier between what you both wanted. Your back arched from the stimulation of him sucking on your bundle of nerves, making an obscenely wet noise as your juices and his saliva caused a heavenly mess. 

Your legs had begun squeezing his face as you weren’t able to control your body, but he didn’t stop; he just simply continued to eat your pretty cunt. “Please….please Remus”, you continued to beg but unsure of what as you were thoroughly warm head to toe with the effects from your last orgasm, but his playful mouth knew just the right ways to keep you at the elevated bliss.

The thickness of his tongue pressed against your throbbing hole, delving as deep as he could go before curling it and exploring the warm softness of your cunt as the tip of his nose stimulated your clit.

It was intense, primarily as his large hands now rested on your abdomen, pushing down and forcing your hips to remain against the table so that he could remain in complete control of the stimulation to your body.

Clenching relentlessly around his tongue, your body couldn’t tell if it was calming down from an orgasm or having another. The overwhelming sensation caused tears to well in your eyes as the apples of your cheeks burned with heat. Everything was too much; even the clothes covering your torso felt claustrophobic as your nipples ached to be free.

“Ah!” you babbled, unable to even say his name as more intense waves of pleasure rocked from your cunt as it pulsed around his tongue. The tears escaped down your cheeks as you tried to gasp for air, your body finally slumping in exhaustion against the table as Remus began to stand from where he’d been on his knees for you.

Each of your legs was carefully eased from his shoulders to dangle off the edge of the wooden surface, not that you could keep them up anyway, as your entire body felt as if it was made of jelly.

“Did so good for me, Love. Taste so fucking good, wanna try?” he asked from where he now looked down at you, hovering only inches away from your face as his fingers wiped away the evidence of the tears. You nod quickly, opening your eyes for a split second to see Remus’ dark eyes and swollen, wet lips before they were pressing against yours, his tongue pushing into your mouth and allowing you the vulgar opportunity to taste your own juices from his mouth.

“My pretty girl tastes so good”, he admired, staring down at you, memorising every flicker of emotions on your face. You mewled at the compliment, nuzzling your face pathetically into his palm as he cradled your face. “What do you want? I want to hear you say it”.

His tone indicated that he was teasing, which was a rare attribute for Remus as he usually just liked to do whatever he had in mind, but when he was like this, wishing to get the very most from you as his werewolf subconscious began to flicker through his thoughts.

“You, I want you. Please!” you stress whilst trying to look up at him, fingers trembling at your side with the need to touch him somehow.

The corners of Remus’ lips tilted up as he smiled down at you, “Have I ever told you how much I love to hear you beg?”

Before you could respond, you were gasping as coolness licked over your chest as he’d swiped his wand down the centre of your clothing until it was falling off of your shoulders, and your body could be free from the confines. His eyes lowered, focused on your pebbled nipples as they begged for him to be touched, but he didn’t rush to them.

Instead, Remus began the long journey of exploring the rest of your body with firm kisses and licking with the flat of his tongue. He paid special attention to your neck, as he always did this close to the full moon as his sharp teeth grazed over your pulse point, the animalistic side of his begging to bite down and mark his girl, but he restrained, knowing it would be painful for you. The last time he’d done so, he’d had a right bollocking off of James and Sirius, who prattled on about how you weren’t his chew toy, even though you had insisted that it was ok.

Moving lower, Remus worshipped your breasts. He was licking the skin around the areola before drawing your nipple and some breast tissue into his mouth, sucking with enough force that the area swelled with the rush of blood. The fire in your core intensified as you gained enough energy to lift your hands and grip his shirt.

“I need you, Remus, please stop teasing me”, you beg, but all that earned in response was an approved grunt.

“Relax, and just let me kiss you”, he sniped with desire as you wanted to sass back but found yourself melting into the table instead. Each inch of your stomach, hips, legs, arms, everywhere he could reach in this position, he praised with his mouth until he was once again hovering above your lips. “All I can think about is you”, he admitted, his tone caught between hunger and pain as his thoughts were becoming too clouded by the wolf’s desire to be close to you.

Your fingers combed through his hair as you tried to sound as calming as possible, “I know, Remus, it’s ok. I’m right here. Take me”.

A shiver ran down his spine as he finally began to unbuckle his trousers, freeing his cock between your bodies as he rested on his elbows on either side of your face so that his face could nuzzle into your neck.

You took the honours of reaching between your legs, grasping his impressively hard cock, admiring the soft skin and veins that bulged as you pulled him closer to where you needed him most.

“Tell me you’re mine”, he begged as you directed his tip to your soaked hole.

Tilting your head so that you could kiss his cheek, you implored, “I’m yours Remus - FUCK!”

All you could do was curse and cling to him as, with one powerful thrust, the majority of his cock stretched into your pussy. You could never take his entire length unless it were through anal play, but that didn’t stop him trying as the pressure became overwhelming as he nudged against your cervix.

Your thighs trembled once more as he gave you time to adjust, sighing blissfully against your neck as if he had finally found what it was that he was looking for. However, as your cunt frantically fluttered around Remus as you adjusted to the intrusion, Remus began to rut his hips in short, snapping thrusts slowly.

You groaned at the sensation and found your hips meeting his until all restraint was gone, and Remus was fucking you hard and fast.

Pushing up on his hands so that he was looking down at you, Remus fucked you hard. The table beneath you groaned just as loudly as you were as it rocked against the floor, and for a split second, you hoped it wouldn’t suddenly collapse beneath you two.

Remus suddenly moved as if hearing your thoughts, widening his stance as he stood to his full height, hands on your thighs and bringing your body to the very edge of the table. In this position, he could fuck you with quick snaps of his hips. Your back arched in this new position, pleasure pouring into your soul.

However, a noise over the sound of the fucking caught your attention as the fire flickered with green flames, and you couldn’t help but gasp, “Sirius!” as he stepped out of the fire, followed closely by James.

Remus, still with his head hunched slightly from where he was watching you intently, growled at the name used, his gaze hardening on you as he leaned back until you looked into each other's eyes. “Wrong name, Sweetheart”, he demanded lowly, fucking into you with as power as he could, causing you to cry out and tense with the pleasure. “I only want my name coming out of your mouth, do you understand?”

“Yes, Remus! I’m sorry!” you plead with him as he fucks you harder.

“There you go, Love. See, it wasn’t so difficult, was it?” As he talks, he lifts his hands and covers your eyes so you can no longer look at Sirius or James as you’re plunged into darkness.

“Don’t be too hard on her, Moony”, James teases from somewhere across the room as you hear him and Sirius shuffling around but are unable to see what they are doing.

Remus grunts but doesn’t stop with his motions, making sure that your next orgasm is just as overwhelming and powerful as the others as your cunt clung to him for dear life, attempting to milk his balls with the powerful clenches but he didn’t stop fucking you all the way through your orgasm.

Having his hand over your eyes was a disorientating position to be in, especially as he would every so often kiss your cheek or neck, savouring your soft skin before moving away so that his momentum could continue.

A hiss echoed across the room from wherever your other two boyfriends currently were, and as another whimper sounded from what you assumed was Sirius, Remus then decided it would be a good time to completely pull out of your pussy, leaving you gaping and empty.

Before you could moan, more disorientation flowed through you as his hand was removed from your face, and your body was being manhandled so that you were now being turned over on the table until your front was pressed against the wood. With a gentle kick to your ankle, Remus made room between your legs for himself and fucked into you. He was even deeper in this angle, which you didn’t think was possible as his chest pressed against your back.

His and didn’t return to your face, allowing you to look at your other lovers. Sirius was currently sitting on James’ lap, both of their fancy clothes more dishevelled from earlier as the bowtie and scarf were off and the top buttons were undone. They stared intently at you and Remus as they touched one another. James was kissing the column of Sirius’ neck whilst his hands groped at the bulge at the front of his trousers. At the same time, Sirius was grinding his hips down on James, who you assumed had a matching bulge that was rubbing against Sirius’ arse.

“You’re mine, Love. Aren’t you? My pretty girl”, Remus whispered with deep penetrations of his cock into your cunt.

“Yes! I’m yours, Remus! You’re so deep”, you proclaim with a cry as you find yourself already wanting to peak and cum over his thick dick again. However, Remus knew you just as well as you knew yourself and could feel the tightening of your soft walls and stopped all thrusting as you sobbed with the beautiful feeling washing away.

His hand eased beneath your face, holding your jaw and forcing your sight away from your boyfriend's until it was tilted to look over your shoulder at Remus. “You only get to cum after them”, he demands before nipping your ear love with a sharp tug of his teeth.

“Moony, you really are tense, aren’t you” Sirius jokes breathlessly as he moves more eagerly against James, whose hand is now fully inside of his boyfriend's trousers, wanking him off in time with the movements.

Thankfully it didn’t take them long to cum, Sirius first with his head thrown back and trousers staining a dark colour in a little puddle. James then rutted up into Sirius a few minutes later, groaning and stilling his movements. Both breathed each other in deeply, lazily kissing and holding onto one another until your sudden gasp echoed around the room as Remus continued with his fucking.

Your head moved to drop onto the table as you accepted the fucking, but Remus’ hand remained beneath, cushioning your face from the hardness of the wooden table as his lips moved to the junction between your throat and shoulder.

With each thrust, Remus repeatedly grunted the possessive word, “Mine!” until it was all you could think about. Your orgasm nearly caused you to pass out with its intensity. Juices streamed from your cunt, dripping down your thighs as waves of clenching pleasure constricted around Remus’ cock until he was forcing as much of himself as he could into you, and thick seed spurted into you. The warmth was welcomed as it soothed your pussy from the inside out as it began to trickle down your thighs, mixing with your own juices.

You were half aware of your movements, more concerned with the fact that you couldn’t control the tremble and sobs as Remus pressed himself harder over your back, making you feel grounded and safe.

“Shh. Slowly breathe in and out for me. That’s it. Slowly breathe for me again, keep going, well done”, Remus encouraged for some time as you’d been close to a panic attack with the overstimulation, close to tipping into the submissive headspace that would have taken them a lot longer to draw you out of.

“It’s just… a lot”, you say shakily, eyes closed and absorbing every warmth he was willing to give you”.

“I know, I’ve got you. I’ve always got you”, he reassured calmly.

You’re exhausted, ready to fall asleep right there on the kitchen table as you whisper, “I wanna go to sleep”.

Remus kissed your naked shoulder, “After we clean you up, ok, Love?”

As Remus begins to stand, his half-hard cock slipping out of your well-used hole with a slurp and shudder from both of you, did James finally step forward whilst readjusting his softening cock in his trousers.

Squatting down next to you, his fingers tentatively caressed your cheek while keeping an eye on Remus behind you to ensure the action wouldn’t trigger him somehow. “You alright there?” James asked softly.

“Mmhm. Just a little sleepy”, you say whilst closing your eyes at the ticklish touch on your face.

Sirius stepped forward from behind James, raising his wand and pointing it to the destroyed rest of the kitchen mess, “I’ll clean up here, you guys look after her, and I’ll join you in the bathroom”.

Remus had to carry you to the bathroom as liquid drips flooded out of you and marked the direction you had been giving Sirius more to clean up. As this house was altered for the four of you, the shower was wide enough to provide you with Remus and James plenty of room to wash together.

You attempted to stand up on your own but ended up leaning heavily on Remus as James washed the remnants of the fucking from your body was skilled, careful fingers.

“You know I didn’t mean to say the wrong name, right? I just didn’t expect to see them standing there and-” you begin to explain with Remus, worried he’d been upset by you saying Sirius’s name earlier.

However, his lips quickly cut you off with a simple peck, “I know”.

Kissing his cheek several times, you mumbled against his skin, “It’s hard to think of anything else when I’m around you. You’re all consuming, Remus”.

Against your lips, you feel the heat radiating off of him in a quick burst of rare embarrassment as he actually blushed at your words.

“She’s right, Moony. Without you, there is no us without you”, James quips in a rare statement of sincerity.

A cough from the bathroom door catches all your attention as Sirius casually leans against the door frame, cheeks round with roast potato as he joins in with the Remus praising. “There’s a reason why we all argue every night to see who gets to be spooned by the magnificent Remus Lupin”.

Three of you chuckled before you asked, “Are you eating my leftovers?”

“What?” he says with a shrug, stepping further into the room and beginning to take off his clothing at last. “The food was scarce at the party, and Moony’s roasties are always so fucking good”.

You nod in agreement before looking up at Remus once more, who looks quite proud of himself for the flow of compliments coming his way. However, as you attempted to lean up onto your tip toes again to kiss his handsome face in some way, your knees decided they were finished holding up your way as you nearly collapsed to the floor, only stopping because of his strong arms wrapping around your waist.

“As much as I appreciate this little pep talk, I think we need to get someone to bed”.

Remus lay in the centre of the bed, where he rightfully deserved to be tonight with you on top of him, face resting on his chest and legs on either side of his hips as each of your hands held his. Sirius and James joined later, deciding they needed some extra alone time in the shower together, as the dry humping hadn’t entirely filled that horny spot for either of them.

You were asleep by the time both men crept into bed, resting either side of you and Remus with arms spooning around your back as the three shared a kiss goodnight. “How was your night?” Remus asked, looking between James and Sirius. “You’re both sober, so I’m assuming no mischief?”

“Oh, Moony, like we need alcohol to cause a riot. Why do you think we’re back so early?” Sirius declares whilst flicking out the laugh and curling in closer to the warmth of bodies as Remus chuckles into the darkness.

[thetepes]

Not to play devils advocate, but I feel like lilys opinion on the usage of the n word is valid. Regardless of someone’s race, I think it’s a little backwards to dictate what someone has to say about another races cultures just because they’re white (or not of that culture), differing opinions aren’t the end of the world and hers wasn’t inherently racist I fear the same goes for the anime thing too, I’m sorry but Japan DOES have of a loli problem, even if her wording was extreme

I’m not white myself (to be fair, not black/japanese either), not that I think it matters to what I can and can’t say about this but I don’t want you to assume I am white because I somewhat defended lily, which is someone I did NOT want to run defense to but maybe I’m too conservative for this space but I mean this in the most respectful way possible, it feels like some of you are reaching on some things just to paint her in a worse light, as if she wasn’t already famously bad 😭

(Feel free to correct me, I’m not trying to be intentionally ignorant for the sake of it I’m just tired of hearing of a lot of echo chambers about the issue without getting to WHY what she says is racist when I think like pretty reasonable??)

Anon, my friend, I do not know how to break this to you, but that is racist. I know you do not mean to be. I know you're trying your best to be as inoffensive as possible. I'm going to do my very best to answer you genuinely because you seem genuine.

Saying Japan has a Loli problem is like saying America has a child pageant problem. It's there. It's a problem, but it's not something floating on the surface everyone in Japan is aware of the magnitude of. It's a niche genre of ero fiction that comes up about as much to your every day Japanese person as child pageants in America.

In the 80's there was this loli boom that took place where it split off from your more typical bishōjo into lolicon. You would find stuff like Future Boy under that genre long before you'd find any ero.

It wasn't until an otaku named Tsutomu Miyazaki was arrested in the late 80s that the darker side of loli came to the awareness of your every day Japanese person. It was a popular genre so there was a LOT of hentai of it. He killed and murdered several little girls between the ages of I think 3 to 6 and it started a panic very similar to the Satanic Panic that happened in USAmerica. He had a massive collection of anime and hentai. I mean massive. From normal things you'd see in Walmart to stuff you could only buy from very specific websites online no normal person would even know about. It wasn't just Loli that was effected though it was all anime.

It's why Otaku culture was so repressed and shameful for a long time and it even killed the Loli boom because the style was associated with the killings. It wasn't until very recently that Otaku culture made a come back, but still Loli isn't making that come back because of the online opinion on Lolicon. It's gone from an art style to something a lot darker and I think that's where the communication sort of faulters? Because if you say to a Japanese person "you have a loli problem" they're going to think you're having a Satanic Panic moment at them.

At least that's been my experience.

This whole thing is why there was the Moe boom in the 2000's, it was an over correction on the part of artists. Trying desperately to get away from that label and people taking advantage of that as well to make slop.

The rise of the Lolita in Harajuku also muddied the water on this because there's an entire beautiful subculture there that branches into a thousand different expressions. "You have a loli problem!" What's the problem with girls in frilly dresses?

You as someone online, who is adept at being online, in critical spaces and animation/anime spaces have so much more exposure to this stuff than anyone on the daily in Japan.

The entire world has a porn problem. The entire world has a sexualizing little girls problem. To point at Japan and specifically repeatedly deem the entire country as having an issue with pedophilia is racist. To go out of your way to bring it up when you're not even discussing anime or Japan is racist. When your hate and ignorance for a place and it's people bleeds into everything you do

That is racism.

[stsgluver]

can I request fluff drabble with geto where the reader has insomnia and he reads to her to help her fall asleep? Congrats on 2k!!

synopsis. you're struggling to sleep after toji's attack.

a/n. thank you!! I hope you enjoy <33 I keep adding Toji in as the bad guy atm and I will continue to do so. also to the lovely anon that requested the academic rivals to lovers I AM IN THE PROCESS OF WRITING IT but it's going to be a lot longer than a short drabble xxx

2k event

“what are you doing?”

you squinted at the sudden light that filled the room. glancing over your shoulder, geto was half sat up, the bedside lamp next to him casting a yellow glow over his tanned skin. he looked tired, eyes half closed, and you felt a pang of guilt.

“sorry suguru,” your hand reached out for his and you interlocked your fingers, giving him a light squeeze. “i didn’t mean to wake you.” you’d been trying to get more comfortable in bed because after two painstakingly long hours of laying and staring at the ceiling, you were starting to get bored.

you’d initially been close to geto, limbs intertwined and his arms securely around you until you’d decided that maybe you were too hot and that was why you couldn’t sleep. except when you moved away you were faced with the same problem and now you weren’t in your boyfriend’s arms – your predicament only worsening.

“why are you awake?” his voice was groggy and sleep was still evident. in any other situation you think you would have just curled back into his arms and let him talk you back to sleep, loving nothing more than to hear him whisper sweet nothings in your ear.

there was a look in his dark eyes though, one that said he already knew the answer to your question. that there was no point in telling him that it was the temperatures keeping you up because you couldn’t even really convince yourself that that was true, let alone him.

you shuffled close to him to rest your head onto his shoulder. one of his arms wrapped around your body, holding you as close as possible to press an encouraging kiss to your forehead.

“i see him every time i close my eyes,” you whispered, voice trembling at the admission. 

geto was shirtless – as he usually was when he slept – and you could see the two large jagged lines that served as a reminder of the man that had nearly slaughtered the two of you and gojo. your fingers hesitantly traced the outline as a silence settled between the two of you.

you’d all been struggling since toji had attacked and you had lost the star plasma vessel. gojo had thrown himself into more training, happily taking on the additional workload the higher ups gave him. geto had become more withdrawn (something you’d tried to talk to him about and he’d dismiss everytime). you, on the other hand, had managed to maintain some kind of normalcy throughout your days, it was at night when all of your issues bubbled to the surface.

“satoru killed him,” geto murmured into your hair, trying his best to ease your racing mind. “you know i won’t let anything hurt you like that again.” you wanted to believe him, you really did, but the phantom pain that bloomed from the scar where you’d been shot throbbed. it was like it was mocking you that no matter how powerful your boyfriend was, no matter how powerful you were, you’d been bested by a mere man with a gun.

when you didn’t respond, geto slipped out of bed, leaving you to sit yourself up properly against the headboard. “where are you going?” you asked him tentatively, a brief moment of insecurity questioning if he was going elsewhere to get a full night’s sleep.

your face lit up in a smile, however, when you realised he was just looking for the book you’d left half read on your desk. when you’d first started dating, most of your alone time happened between lessons. geto would join you underneath a tree of your choosing, head in your lap as you read aloud and he took a nap.

“i love you,” you murmured once geto had settled back into bed. he’d committed to his bit, even going as far as to steal your reading glasses. your giggle was worth it and, for a brief moment, all feelings of unease disappeared for the two of you.

“i love you. now,” geto flicked through the pages to find the small bookmark you had made together, “where were we…”

[love-bitesx]

HII!!! how are you?? i love your writing so much‼️‼️ i have an actual question and then a request for fic or yk what i mean?

the question is do you take anons? like emoji anons so like you know whos who while stillmbeing able tl be anonymous? if you do could i be one? and if i can be an emoji anon could i be 🪐? (im just writing all this on one ask so it wont be a hassle yk?)

and as for the request i was wondering if you could write hobie with a fem reader (can be gender neutral idc) who love’s physical touch but has sensory issues/overloads where sometimes even when like just holding hands they random tuck their hand away and get annoyed or irritated from all kinds of physical touch but still love it? idk how to explain it all that well😓😓 like the reader’s love language is physical touch but they dont ask for it and mostly think they dont deserve it due to being touch starved and now that hobie came along they love the touch but the sensory issues/overloads make it harder??

im so sorry if this is confusing🙏🏼🙏🏼 also you dint have tk write this if you dont want to its completely understandable!! love your work sm‼️

take care🫶🏼

HIII IM SORRY THIS GOT LOST COMPLETELY, HI 🪐 ANON ILY !! i absolutely will take emoji anons i love all my little anon/requesters ur all angels

sensory issues r icky!!! i struggle with them massively, especially in relationships – i get it!! this is a safe space for anything like that, and any neurodivergent readers/requesters!! i love u all

hobie x reader w sensory issues!!

- initially, he’d be defensive about it

- as in the very first time you denied his touch, purely because he’d be convinced you’re mad at him.

wringing your wrists, you breathed a shaky sigh of relief as peace restored itself in your head, sitting yourself down on your sofa, letting yourself relax. it’d been a tough day, with even tougher emotions, and your chest burnt with tension, skin crawling at the feeling of your jumper against it. movement sounded somewhere in the apartment, but you ignored it, just allowing yourself a moment of peace.

until, you felt a hand slide itself into yours, the sofa dipping in weight as hobie threw himself next to you. a conflicted wave of emotions hit you, immediate comfort filling your chest at the feeling of your dear boyfriends touch after a long day – but your skin surged with irritation, brain overwhelming itself with noise, causing you to rip your hand away.

“darlin’?” hobie’s voice was small, concern lacing it’s words.

“i-i just need to be alone, hobie,” you avoided his gaze, pushing yourself up off the sofa and heading to your room. he followed, not unlike a lost puppy, wracking his brain to see if maybe he’d upset you.

“did i do somethin’, y/n?” his tone was sterner, almost defensive.

“no, no, i just–” you sighed, hands shaking slightly as you attempted to surprise the growing annoyance in your chest, “i just need a little space, i need to be on my own right now.”

- he would take your words completely differently, thinking you meant space from him

- but once you explained that it wasn’t him specifically, purely just your brain deciding that hey! now everything suddenly feels disgusting and fills you with ungodly rage, he was a lot more considerate & understanding.

- took him a little while, purely because he was obsessed with your touch, literally drunk off it most days.

- his natural stance was with you, leant against you or arm suspended over your shoulders, so it took him some time to get used to that not happening occasionally.

- he’d learn little ways to ask you if it’s okay

- mostly, he would just outright ask “a’right if i touch you, pretty?” and wait for your answer patiently

- but if you’re out and about, or maybe with others, and he can see that you’re overwhelmed and possibly even verbally shutdown, he had a little routine:

- he’d be subtle with it, tapping his own knee or a subtle wave to catch your eyeline, and once you were watching, he’d interlock his own hands, a questioning look in his eye.

- if you nodded, he’d be all over you, content with the feeling of you

- if you shook your head, or averted his gaze, he’d simply smile, and wait patiently for you to come to him

- more than anything, he just wants to learn from you – learn what you like, what you don’t like, how he can help when you’re overwhelmed, if he even can, etc.

- he’d be sooooo patient my god

- he’d literally wait for hours, even longer if it meant you would be comfortable and happy

he’s just happy to have u by his side and call you his!! he doesn’t mind if he can’t touch you all the time, and he never takes any outbursts or bad moods to heart, he understands it’s hard for you

if other people weren’t as understanding, though — maybe friends draping themselves over you, hugging you, nudging you, etc. when your sensory issues were more prevalent, he’d be the first one to your defense

bonus:

if you had verbal shutdown, he’d carry around a little notepad in his pockets at all times, even when you’re not around (he just got used to carrying it). he likes seeing the little drawings and doodles you do, little kisses you put on the page for him when you can’t express it yourself physically, or verbally.

he just loves u a lot.

[xoxoluka]

hey! can i put in a request about long distance friends (maybe theres a lil summin going on but who knows?) reader and schlatt?

just have an idea of reader living in brighton or something and schlatt comes to visit...

sorry for the wait anon, pls enjoy!

jschlatt x reader

summary: schlatt has a crush on you, but you live in an entirely different country. he’ll find a way to make it work.

warnings: uhhhh

a/n: i got this request in a group of other notifications while i was at prom, i almost didn’t notice it :p also idk how school works in the uk sooo lmao

"listen, jay, we can meet up as soon as this semester ends, alright?" you say, trying to compromise with him. "as soon as I get back, I'll hop on a flight to Austin."

It's not like you wanted to put such a big wedge between the two of you, but you had gotten such a big offer from University of Brighton (full ride, you couldn't turn that down) towards your Art and Design degree, that there was absolutely no way you were going anywhere in the US. You lived in New York originally, you and Schlatt grew up together. It was weird being so far away from him.

"you can't just come now? take a week off or something?" he groaned.

"you know I can't," you sigh, sitting down on the bed in your dorm. "it's may. i'll be there in a few weeks, the term isn't much longer."

it was always odd having this conversation with him. something never felt right. you understood wanting to see him as a friend, but you always wanted to see him more than that. you chalked it up to being so close, but you knew in some small part of your mind that it wasn't the reason.

"alright, fine. but you're coming straight here when you're done."

"deal."

~

schlatt nearly lost an arm and a fucking leg trying to get here. first, the airport in Texas wasn't accepting his passport, then there was an issue with his luggage, and he almost missed his flight. and if that wasn't enough, he couldn't find the correct exit in the airport in Brighton, and there were no taxis available, making him stand there and wait for 45 minutes. thankfully, you had told him the time of your graduation in a phone call a few nights ago when you were complaining about how late it was.

he finally made it to the college after his many issues, and was just in time to watch you walk the stage.

"Y/N L/N, graduating with honors and a bachelor's degree in Art and Design." The crowd clapped as you stepped up on stage, from your seat down on the floor, taking the diploma and shaking the hands of the many people on stage. on your way back down, you think you pot a familiar face, but psych yourself out of the thoughts before you think about it too hard.

the ceremony ends a while after, and the crowd and graduates are dismissed. you planned on just going back to your dorm to pack, taking your cap off and holding it and your diploma under your arm as you walk, staring down at your phone.

"leaving without me?" you hear from behind you, making you perk up and whip around, seeing your favorite person standing behind you.

"oh my god!" you exclaim, jumping into his arms excitedly. tears of joy brim your eyes, laughing as he hugged you back.

you stayed like that for a good minute or so before he put you down and you separated.

"when did you get here?" you ask through laughs, wiping your eyes.

"just a while ago, made it right on time." he answers.

"jesus christ, i love you." you say before even realizing your mistake, and it took you a moment to register his silence.

you look up at him once you realized, a look of terror and guilt on your face. he looks serious, making you question if you had just blown it all. you hadn't even planned on telling him at all.

thankfully, he breaks and laughs, pulling you into a hug again. "love you too, toots."

you let out a breath of relief and laugh, holding him as tight as you can. "you came at the perfect time, I need someone to help me pack."

schlatt playfully groans in response to that, but looks down at you. "i guess i'll help you."

a/n: i crave the schlanket can someone buy me one

© property of xoxoluka. do not repost.

[thechy-fychannel]

hi i am a chase adorer and as such would like to know your opinions on that weird little himbo

it is my belief that chase has/had a rather strong crush on house, probably influenced to a large degree by his severe case of the daddy issues (fawning subtype, in contrast to house's fighting subtype). i think that combining this with his lack of self-esteem (see: voluntarily working for house for ~7 years) would make him INCREDIBLY vulnerable to house asking him for sexual favors. like even if it was a joke i think chase would just kinda go for it and probably freak out house a little, but i digress. do you see my vision?

anyway my point is i am a chase lover and chouse shipper, do you have thoughts on my blorbo or my ship?

hi anon i'm so sorry it's taken me so long to get around to answering this!! honestly it took me a WHILE to put my thoughts together about chase bc I have a lot of em!!

first of all, chase is SUCH a weird little himbo, he's incredibly complicated and accomplished and tbh I feel like the show never took him seriously enough until the very end when they were setting him up to take over for house. there's something about that catholic guilt and the constant need to be the specialist boy in the whole world while NEVER succeeding at being treated like the specialist boy in the world that's just lick your fingers delicious when you break his character down. he's filled with so much need and desire and is any of it ever fulfilled? No. As are many such cases.

anon, I see your vision SO MUCH and it's exactly how I feel about them too. while I don't necessarily ship chouse in a positive sense, I also dig the very unhealthy dynamic they would have as this gross unbalanced hookup situationship where chase is like "🥺 he wouldn't keep propositioning me if he didn't actually like me, even if he won't admit it 🥺" and house is like "damn, he looks pretty on his knees, maybe i should follow him into the bathroom" alfjalfklakfld.

I was just rewatching clips from when chase's dad visits and house genuinely feels so bad for chase bc he sees the amount of hurt his dad caused him and he definitely sees a lot of himself and his own daddy issues there. (bonus points for house calling him "robert" in this soft way that I rly love) I could definitely see this being the catalyst for something happening between them, chase is sad and broody with those sad watery eyes and house has a real moment of vulnerability with him, says something nice to him and then tries to cover it up by saying something inappropriate. As a joke. Obviously. but chase takes it literally and makes a pass at him that house initially rejects, but then chase gets even more sad and embarrassed and house actually feels bad for the guy— that poor pathetic blond puppy with wet eyes and a pretty mouth... and he rolls his eyes and tells himself he "lets it happen" while being a very active participant in whatever comes next.

the first time could be written off just as two repressed men taking comfort in each other in a moment of father-induced vulnerability... but the rest of the times are definitely an unfortunate combination of chase's lack of self esteem and house's selfish, manipulative nature. chase is just so much prettier (and cheaper) than the male hookers available in the tri-state area and he's just as easy. chase isn't stupid by any means, he knows what house is looking for when his eyes drag up and down his figure and make some comment about his pretty lips or girlish waist or "chase in his little short shorts." but poor chase is just so eager, so hopeful, so romantic. he could easily convince himself that they have something deep and meaningful when it's really just bj's in the sleep lab or the very occasional late night booty call.

and house can be so gross about it too, especially when he learns that he can be gross and it doesn't deter chase— actively holding his job over him in such a teasing and casual way that chase convinces himself there's no way he'd ever get rid of me, look at the way he throws the threat around if I stopped giving him what he wants, it's all just a joke to him. And then house fires him :) and oh boy would chase have a meltdown and reevaluate his entire life bc what do you mean he's not house's special boy? he was supposed to be his special boy. but he isn't, and he never will be bc he's doomed to be daddy's little disappointment forever, just like house :)

[incorrectmahabharatquotes]

On Mahabharat and the Agency of Women in the epic

If you saw me post the actual reply to this, no, you didn't. I'm so sorry, anon. I accidentally posted the unfinished draft. I will correct my mistake here. I am prefacing all the following words with: That's Just My Opinion, You're Allowed To Have Your Own Opinions.

There's a short answer and a long answer to this ask.

The short answer is: in my opinion, women didn't have a lot of agency. But they were still significant, in the sense that they are so central to the plot that the epic would not exist without the roles they play. If you take any one of them away, the story would be changed inexorably.

The long answer depends on what you would consider as "agency" and what version specifically you are thinking of.

I can talk about Sanskrit text that we have access to and is generally considered as the Original and True version(I don't agree with this and can go on a great big rant about this. In a different post, maybe.)

To lay the groundwork for my explanation, you have to remember how the current Sanskrit text came into being. Originally, the Mahabharat was part of the oral stories told by suta bards(who used to accompany kings into battles as their charioteers and after the battles, would recount the battle and tell glorified and embellished stories about it). It was only written down MUCH later(multiple centuries later) by some brahmins roughly around the time the Yajur Veda were being composed. The oral versions were only one quarter of the length of the written version. So during the writing portion we can assume they added a lot more stuff (which tracks because when you read it, you can clearly see the difference between the story plot beats and the brahminical morality propaganda bits) This context is important. Please keep this in mind.

The mahabharat is a historical document but not in the sense some people would have you believe. It's a document of SOCIAL history at the time it was composed.  It reflects the norms, laws and morality of the culture that they were composed and codified in.

As such, you have a story that is conflicted about how it feels about certain topics. Polyandry being one of them. It was probably a more common occurrence back in the ye old oral storytelling years. We see a lot of instances of women having multiple partners. And these instances are so intrinsically linked to the essence of the story that it's hard to get rid of them. Now we move forward to the time when it was being written down, where polyandry is frowned upon, if not outright forbidden, but you have the issue of Draupadi having five husbands being integral to the story. Hence, you have MULTIPLE attempts to reason it away. The incarnation reason, the five blessings reasons, the regenerating "virginity" etc. Those guys(the aforementioned Brahmin writers) were struggling to present her as a unique situation and make sure that we know that polyandry is NOT acceptable but in this one case, because of Special Divine Reasons, we have to let it slide.

Now we come to the "agency" part. That's a little more difficult because everyone has different mileage of what they consider to be as an active character.

What I can tell you is that we barely get any internality from the female characters in the Sanskrit text. There are a few scenes thrown in sporadically but they have an extreme case of "the writer doesn't view women as actual people". There's also the Stree Parva which, on paper, is all about the women and their grief after the war but even that sort of focuses all the attention on the men, both dead and alive(including their unborn male fetuses).

What matters when it comes to women, according to the epic, are their bodies. Both in the sexual and reproductive contexts. Women are always described by their external appearance(mostly their hips and thighs) and by extensions, their sexuality. (I've lost count of how many times a mysterious wind will strip a woman completely naked so that a bunch of men can stare at her or worse, EJACULATE upon seeing her. They even did that shit to Ganga and she's GANGA. Divine river goddesses are not immune to this shit trope.) Women will often be abducted for marriage and it's just considered as a kshatriya norm of the time. There are multiple instances of being compared to empty containers(bags or fields) for a man's seed(semen). And ironically, they consider the children as copies of the father alone and that there is nothing of the mother in the said children. (This obviously reflects how society at the time was obsessed with the patrilineal lines of succession to maintain patriarchy and control over land and wealth.)

Most of the rare instances of women having some power and agency in the epic come from these two contexts, i.e. having some control over the sexual access of men over their bodies OR having control over their children.

Women didn't typically have rights to succession to the land, wealth and property of their family. In fact, in Chitrangada's case, who does succeed the kingdom after her father this is considered a rare and unique case worthy of note.

This is not to say that the female characters of the Mahabharat aren't interesting or strong. I'm merely telling you how the Sanskrit text narrative treats these characters because of the writers' own biases and viewpoints.

Beyond the Sanskrit text, you have many other versions who will often expand upon the roles of the women. Some regional Mahabharats delete or add scenes according to their own norma. A lot of folk stories breathe life and dimensionality to these women by giving them more to say. Multiple famous plays over the year have given a more gentle and kind touch to the female characters of the cast of this epic.

In the modern contemporary context, everyone is obsessed with writing a feminist retelling(the success of just how feminist said retellings are is a different matter entirely).

If you do find any fault in how active the characters are, the blame often lies at the hand of the storyteller rather than the character themselves.

(P.S. Before anyone gets furious and starts typing an angry anon about how women were "considered goddesses and therefore it means that they had a lot of power", I want to remind everyone that deification often reduces the figure into an inhuman entity and isn't as far from objectification as you would like to think.)

-Mod S

[ryuichirou]

What do you think about Lilia and Idia's chats? I know you ship them but did they affect you in any way?

Sorry for the late reply, Anon!

This is one of those asks that I really went “oh no I have to think about this one properly, this is a very important topic” lol But it’s probably for the best because today is kind of a perfect day for me to write about this particular topic.

As always, I ended up talking a whole lot, so I hope you enjoy reading it. I’ll try not to digress too much!

Short answer would be yes of course it affected me: I’m pretty sure it was one of the main reasons why I started shipping them in the first place.

As someone who crawled out of Homestuck’s cradle (and will stay there forever at least in some capacity), I really love it when characters chat. I think all of us act a bit differently when we’re on the internet, even if we’re trying to be 100% honest, or at least we are perceived a bit differently. And when you have two characters who know each other irl, but also know each other online as different people, and one of them is crushing hard, it creates such an interesting dynamic… so beautiful.

It’s very interesting to see Idia swooning so hard. He doesn’t act that way around anybody else, even people he is kind of close with (Azul is the only example but), which contrasts nicely to his usual snarky antisocial self. I love it a lot when this type of character gets very into someone and ends up being a bit tormented by his own inner demons: he craves to be closer to that person, he wants to spend more time together, but he is scared that the moment he accepts his feeling he’s going to get hurt. He is terrified of being vulnerable, but Muscle Crimson makes him so happy that he just can’t help himself. Idia is so cynical and pessimistic, he already accepted the fact that he’ll stay lonely forever, and yet whenever Lilia appears, he gets hopeful, romantic and longing. Very Megara of you, Idia lol

What doesn’t help is that no matter what Muscle Crimson does, somehow it only makes him more perfect in Idia’s eyes…

For starters, in ch6 Idia said that one of the things he loves most about Muscle Crimson is that he never oversteps and is very understanding of him, and how he is very natural in a way he expresses things. What I’m trying to say is that Idia never feels like he has to explain himself or push himself, like MC always gets it and never pries into his affairs. This is the thing that Idia usually struggles with the most: social expectations, the pacing of a conversation, the arbitrary rules of how two people should communicate; and he doesn’t have those issues with MC whatsoever. It’s very easy for him to talk with MC because the moment this usual obstacle isn’t present, Idia is suddenly very eager to connect with another person. MC is chill, MC is nice, MC is mature and MC isn’t needy. We see it so much with their online conversations, it’s incredible.

I also really love their chats because they very nicely show what exactly Idia wants from a relationship. Whenever I talk about Idia’s ideal type, Idia’s love language, Idia’s anything, I always end up talking about it: Idia loves quality time and sharing things that he loves with others, so the fact that he can play videogames with Lilia is massively important for him, but this isn’t the only thing. In Idia’s dorm uniform vignette (god that vignette is such a feast for a multishipper), Idia gets so excited because MC not only agreed to listen to his favourite band, but also was engaged enough to express that he wants to listen to them! On his own volition! Azul-shi who didn’t even bother to listen to their music that Idia kindly brought to him should take notes!

I’m sorry but let’s take a look at this dialogue (official translation from wiki but I just want to make a point okay):

<Muscle Red>  

Ah, I see. My apologies for not being well-informed on the topic.

<Gloomurai>   

NP! sorry for rambling about something you don't care about lol

Imagine ranting to someone about your oshiis, and instead of being annoyed or politely agreeing with you, the person goes “oh I’m sorry that I haven’t heard about them”. Of course, Idia’s instinct is to pull back a little and to apologise for his rambling and to joke about MC not being interested – not as a jab at Lilia, but as a jab at himself instead for bothering him with unnecessary information.

And instead of just letting the conversation go to some other lane (which would’ve been a bit sad, but ultimately not that bad because Lilia’s initial response wasn’t an annoyed one), for some reason, MC does this of all things:

<Muscle Red>  

Actually, after seeing how passionate you are about them...

<Muscle Red>  

My interest in this Premo group has been thoroughly piqued.

<Gloomurai>   

you're already interested just from hearing me drone on and on?

<Gloomurai>   

you're like the nicest guy. i'd give you 100 rare drops if i could

<Muscle Red>  

Would you recommend a particular song for a first-time listener?

Not only he didn’t get a “ehhh yeah cool”, but he also got a “send me their songs” instead. It’s like Lilia is actively trying to lure this poor otaku boy into his embrace lol But the best thing is that it is so casual and genuine, even Idia-the-biggest-cynic doesn’t feel like he is just trying to be nice about it. And as I always say, despite being a hikikomori, Idia is good at reading people, and someone as insecure as he is would’ve definitely thought that MC was just being nice. But he didn’t, instead he got super excited about it.  The boy is so smitten he’s melting as we speak...

And not only that! When in that exact vignette some shenanigans happen with the website of the band, and Idia gets upset about it, MC is so quick to cheer him up and comfort him. It’s interesting with Lilia because he really is wise and mature, but sometimes he doesn’t quite know what to say to comfort someone?? There are some areas in which he is a bit clumsy, I guess, but it seems like when it comes to Gloomy Samurai, it feels like he knows him super well. How his mind and emotion operates, what makes him upset. It’s sweet that he is very eager to support him and feels genuinely bad for him; we’re even shown Lilia himself in his own room being troubled that his online buddy might get depressed over what happened. It’s just so… sweet?? I don’t think Idia had anyone other than Ortho support him like that before. I’ll talk about Lilia in general in a moment though.

One last thing about this vignette is that I wanted to talk about is this little exchange:

<Gloomurai>   

it'd be so cool if we could meet up IRL...

<Muscle Red>  

Oh? Well, if you wish to meet offline, I'd gladly visit whenever you like.

<Gloomurai>   

oh nonononono, i live in a super remote place rn!

<Gloomurai>   

i'd have to take planes, trains, buses, and boats to go p. much anywhere

<Gloomurai>   

meeting up would be a whole THING...

Imagine Idia fucking Shroud not only having a gaming buddy he is excited to talk to, and not only entertaining the idea of meeting said buddy irl, but also EXPRESSING THIS IDEA OUTLOUD? And once again, he is met with enthusiasm, because OF COURSE MC wouldn’t mind hanging out irl! And the moment he gets that response, he pulls back once again, keeping his distance, being anxious and overwhelmed by the possibility of meeting up with MC. It’s incredibly interesting to see Idia acting this way, and once again it shows just how much he doesn’t want to ruin what they have right now. Let’s be honest, it’s not just the fact that he is in NRC; he would’ve easily traveled somewhere if he needed to, they have portals, for fuck’s sake, although not for personal usage. In this convo Idia does what Idia does all the time in their chats: he dares to express interest in MC’s irl affairs, and then gets terrified that MC won’t like it, or MC will answer and somehow this newfound knowledge will ruin something, or that things will get weird: Idia just doesn’t want to risk breaking this balance between them that is super fragile in his eyes.

I love him being so unsure and anxious. I love him being invested and infatuated, but also being so afraid to get hurt. It’s like Lilia is taming him little by little… which isn’t intentional on Lilia’s part lol He’s just hanging out with the guy he likes to hang out with! And the guy is out there falling in love deeper and deeper with every single one of their chat.

But the thing is, this is still not completely one-sided. It’s just that we tend to focus on Idia during these chats, and Idia is really crushing hard on Lilia, but when we’re shown Lilia’s side in his Suitor Suit vignette, we have a little more info on how he feels.

I find it interesting that after Idia’s little rant about how marriage in-game is a stupid mechanic and that it’s such a pain, Lilia changes his mind about asking Idia if he wanted to get married in-game… for unlocking an achievement of course. Which is SUCH A SHAME because Idia would’ve gone full 180 on this topic and would’ve accepted his proposal so fucking hard lol After learning just how much Idia pulls back and rambles, the whole thing really feels like Idia thinking that someone like MC would never ask him for something like this, and how suggesting it himself would’ve been stupid: what if MC thinks that he’s weird or clingy or cringe? So he threw the ball to Lilia’s side of the court so aggressively, that Lilia just figured that Idia hated the idea in general and didn’t want to play with him at all… SUCH A SHAAAME.

But still, it shows that Lilia also doesn’t want to make Gloomy Samurai uncomfortable. Not from the place of extreme shyness, but from the place of loving hanging out with him and not wanting things to become too complicated.

But also!! It’s so interesting to compare the way they act and type. Lilia is so proper with his lack of emoticons, but he is still playful with his comments from time to time. So reliable, so mature, of course Idia’s mental portrait of Muscle Crimson is “older man who may or may not have a family and may or may not be a proper businessmen” lol The boy is talking to someone else’s husband and dad in his head… I also love moments during which Lilia just goes “oh yeah I used to wear armour for work” and Idia just assumes that he’s joking around. I want to see more of their chats ahhh! And I want the big reveal!!

On a personal note (you don’t have to read that part lol), I have my own sentimental reasons to be so into this whole thing. It feels very nostalgic because the whole dynamic, the situations, even the typing style to some degree, it all feels very similar to what we went through ages ago. I won’t point at Lilia and say “he’s just like me for real” because I definitely wasn’t as slick as him at the stupid age of 16, but I did try to have this mature image back then lol But also, just like Lilia, seriously underestimated just how much that antisocial sweetheart I enjoy talking to a lot is into me.

Those early stages of the growing and blossoming relationship, moments of pulling back, showing initiative, trying and being insecure about all those things: I can see it in them, especially in Idia. Since I was technically the Lilia of the situation, I feel such warmth witnessing those early steps in Idia, his crush and his doubts about the whole thing. It’s like… flirting, but not quite? Some other style of flirting that isn’t really noticeable until you really look at it. Since I myself was quite dense back then and, once again, didn’t notice a crush (that I was told about btw) for quite some time, I feel especially sorry for Idia and his pains LOL But also, especially hopeful~

It’s precious. I could’ve written something edgier or sexier but ultimately I feel like it’s very precious, at least to me lol I really love these two. And this is why I’m writing this post today of all days. Very sneaky of me.

Anyways, thank you so much for your question, Anon <3 I love these two a lot.

[darling-i-read-it]

System

Dalton Lambert x fem!reader

Word Count: 2.6k

Warnings: set after insidious the red door so spoilers for that, the readers scared daltons wandered off again 

Author’s Note: Sorry this took so long love! I’ve been a bit everywhere lately but I was finally happy with this. Also my spell check is being hella weird so if there’s some misspelled things just ignore it lol. I hope you enjoy!

Requested: by anon, hi i literally just got home from the insidious movie with my friend, but i was wondering if you are taking requests, if not feel free to ignore! but i was wondering if you’d be able to do a dalton x reader where they maybe meet his family? and he has an episode during it and gets stuck in the further and reader has to try and coax him out of it? or he has an episode and comes out of it in a panic attack like state and reader helps him through it and his family is in shock that dalton lets her see him like that. they think its really sweet that she can help him through it and everything.

I don’t own these characters. They belong to author/director/creator

(not my gif)

Thanksgiving break. You could fear the cold in the air as people talked lightly going down to their cars, happy to leave school behind for a couple days of rest. Dalton threw his bag over his shoulder, watching you watch the window. The leaves were falling onto the street, whisked away by the gentle wind. You could see people’s silent laughter through the glass. 

“You ready?” Dalton’s voice broke you out of your trance. You nodded once, pulling your bag up over your head as well. It just had some clothes and your laptop, plus chargers. You hadn’t been expecting to go back for Thanksgiving with your heavy workload. 

“Your dads here?” 

“Yeah, pulling up outside.” You turned back to the window like you could locate him. Dalton grabbed your hand and pulled you towards the door. You followed him outside of his dorm room. He shut and locked it behind him before leading you down the stairs among the stragglers of people leaving for break. 

You had never seen the parking lot so crowded. 

Dalton put his phone to his ear, keeping a firm grip on your hand. You followed him blindly. 

“Near the flag poles isn’t an instruction dad,” Dalton said, voice annoyed. You looked around, trying to place the car. You didn’t actually know what he was driving but you knew Mr.Lambert’s face. “There are a ton of flag polls.” Your eyes scanned the area. “Are you talking about the one with the school flag?” You sat Josh Lambert, standing outside of his car with the door opened. You hit Dalton and pointed. He followed your gaze. Dalton hung up the phone and guided your way through the parking lot. 

Mr. Lambert smiled when he saw you both. He pointed beside him, where an American flag was posted between some trees. 

“It was the only thing near me,” he explained. 

“Don’t worry about it.” You offered your hand to shake. 

“You must be Y/N. I’ve heard a lot.” Josh shook your head. 

“Thank you for letting me stay over the break. My family is so far away and getting a plane ticket in this weather has never been good odds.” Josh’s smile was genuine and kind. You had only met him over the phone but Dalton had mostly assured you of his normalcy. After the whole flying away possessed by demon thing, you understood that Josh also had issues with staying in his head. You felt for him. 

“Oh of course. Any friend of Dalton’s is a friend of ours.” Josh winced, trying to find the right words. “It’s a pleasure.” 

“That’s good dad.” Dalton took your backpack. You smiled gently, trying to let him know you understood what he was trying to give off. “This is gonna be a long drive.”

-

Josh asked you plenty of questions, happy that someone in his car actually answered him. You didn’t mind chatting. It was a couple hours after all. Before you were there, Dalton couldn’t exactly shut out and put his headphones in. Still, he sat behind you, sketch book out, half listening. 

Eventually you came to his and his moms home. It was nice and large, almost secluded but not quite. You didn’t peg Dalton for a large house kind of guy but the second his mom opened the door, it all clicked into place. 

Josh had started recently living with Renai again, much to Dalton’s surprise. He didn’t talk about it often, only in passing. You were able to pick up bits and pieces from everyone’s body language but that was about it. 

Renai had Josh take your bags. 

“Thank you so much Mrs. Lambert for letting me stay,” you said hurridly as she ushered you inside. She smiled, so brightly it hurt. She looked just like Dalton’s pictures of her. Goregous and kind. 

“Renai, please. Dalton go take those upstairs.” 

“Are we allowed to sleep in the same room?” Dalton asked, teasingly. 

“You can sleep in the guest room,” she said, ushering him away. She turned to you. Dalton walked up the stairs, followed closely by his father and your bags. “It’s nice to formally meet you Y/N.” 

“And you! I’ve heard so much, seen your face on a lot of different sketches,” you joked. Her smile remained, dripping in generosity but not so much it made you uncomfortable. You felt instantly comfortable in the house. 

“I’m sure you’ve become the new muse,” she joked. 

“He’s extremely talented. He could make a tree look interesting.” 

“Don’t say it to him, it’ll go straight to his head.” Renai would sometimes call you when she was worried about Dalton. After the demon event she grew more worried about having him out of the house. You became her eyes and ears, which she was eternally grateful for. 

There was a childlike commotion upstairs. You both turned to see a little girl barreling down, her hand loosely holding the railing. Once she hit the bottom she halted. Dalton was following close behind her and behind him was another teen boy, though younger than Dalton. It was easy to guess the names. 

“Oh shit D,” Foster mumbled. Dalton hit him. 

“Are you Y/N?” Kali asked. You nodded. 

“And you must be Kali! It’s very nice to meet you.” She smiled, ogling. You grew self conscious under everyone's gaze. Dalton pushed through his siblings to get to you. 

“Hey, go get your own person to stare at.” He grabbed your hand. “C’mon, I wanna show you my room.” 

“No funny business,” Josh said as he came down the stairs. “Keep that door open.” 

“He doesn’t bring girls home often,” Renai explained. 

“Mom,” Dalton seethed. You laughed as he tugged at your arm. You followed him up the stairs. 

“It was nice to meet all of you!” you called, your arm half way out of it’s socket. You observed the place as you walked, glancing at the family photos on the wall. At some point they started to lack Josh completely. “You’re were so cute,” you cooed at one of the photos. “What happened?” 

“Woah there.” You laughed as you finally landed upon his room. It was a normal teenage boys bedroom but cleaner. You wondered if Renai had cleaned when Dalton left. There was art supplies still scattered on the desks and some laying on his made bed. Your bags were put off to the side, next to his. 

“I see you have no intention of posting up in the guest bedroom?” 

“Oh no,” he said. “My mom’s a lightweight and will be in bed by nine.” There was countless pictures on the wall. Some were painted, some where with ink, some with just pencil. It was like a whole other gallery. “I have a couple new ones to add up there.” 

“Oh yeah?” You turned back to him. He was grabbing his sketchbook out of his bag. He turned it open to the one he was working on in the car. It was a back view of his dad and you talking. Josh was mid word but you were smiling, watching intently. “Is that why you weren’t talking with us?” 

“I don’t like my dads taste in music.” You grinned warmly. 

“I love it. Like I love all your stuff.” He carefully went to tear it out and you moved to get some things out of your bag. 

-

You had dinner, courtesy of Renai, and quickly turned in. Dalton made a big show of going to bed in the guest bedroom, rolling his eyes and pretending to pout. You cuddled into his bed, scrolling through your phone as you waited for him to come back. Your eyes drooped. It had been a long day, filled with new things. Dalton’s bed was way more comfortable then the dorm room bed and far bigger too. 

At 10 you heard the door open slowly. You turned on your side and smiled sleepily at Dalton walking in. He ran his hands through his hair, shutting the door quietly behind him. He climbed under the sheets beside you. You moved over to make room but the bed was big enough where it almost didn’t matter. 

“Bigger than the dorm room bed huh?” he questioned. You usually had to squeeze together. You got very used to being on top of each other. 

“Just a lil.” 

He dipped his head over you, kissing you gently. Your body eased into his touch. His lips were lazy and sleepy, also fueled by the long day. He moved away after a moment and layed his head down next to you. 

“Tease,” you joked. 

“My mother is in the next room.” 

“No more kisses then.” 

He scoffed and the two of you got comfortable, his arm under your head, your cheek against his chest. The window was creaked open, the sound of the suburbs floating into your ears as you drifted off. 

-

You woke up with a start. There was an echo of a noise but you were still half asleep and couldn’t pinpoint it. You sat up, glancing down at Dalton. He laid on his back, eyes shut. You looked around the dark room. You didn’t know it’s curves well enough to know what had changed. You rubbed your eyes, trying to decide if you were still asleep or not. 

Through your shadowy perception, you saw the door creak open. It was slow but the movement struck home. You turned to Dalton and nudged him. He didn’t move. You nudged him again, harder this time. He stayed completely still, the only indication he was alive from his breathing. 

“Dalton,” you muttered. You shoved him again, almost knocking him off the bed. 

Nothing.

Fear shone in the lights of your eyes. You sat up completely and turned on the lamp beside your bed. You took a deep breath. You had done this before. You could do it agian. Dalton and you had talked about what you could do when this happened. He assured you that, while he likely couldn’t get possessed by that same demon, there was no guarentee he couldn’t drift off. 

You cleared your throat and set your shoulders back. 

“Dalton can you hear me?” Your voice was loud and clear. It needed to project if he was gonna hear you. You took clear breaths in, counting and then releasing. “Dalton, baby, you’ve gone to far.” 

You glanced back at the door. Had he left? Was that him coming back in? How long had be been out? 

“Dalton, listen to me. Follow my voice.” 

With each passing tick of the clock you got more anxious. You wondered if you were too late. Your breathing became more labored as you sat there, starring at his face, begging it to move. “Dalton.” 

You knew shaking him did no good but you did it anyway. 

Renai could hear your speaking in the other room. Despite what Dalton said, she was also easy to rise. She had gotten into the habit when Kali was a baby, always able to easily identify her childrens voices. She knew it was yours immediately. She nudged Josh, who woke up after a couple pushes. 

They listened for a moment, making sure they weren’t going to enter some sort of scene they would never be able to unsee. But then your voice came again. 

“Dalton, follow my voice. I’m right here.” Renai knew the script well. It sent shivers down her spine to hear someone else say it. She quickly moved the covers aside and padded down the hallway to Dalton’s open door. She stood in the frame, Josh behind her. You were turned away, looking down, sitting practically on top of Dalton. Your voice, though stressed, was soothing. 

“Dalton I’m right here. Come back to me.” Renai was about to jump forward and start helping when Dalton sat up straight. He hit your head with his because he was moving so fast. You both groaned in pain.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry,” he said quickly, grabbing your cheeks. “Are you okay? Did I bruise you?” 

“No, no I’m okay,” you breathed. You let out a hefty sigh of relief. “Are you okay? You scared me!” 

“I’m fine, I’m okay,” he promised. “Followed your voice.” 

“Everything okay?” Josh asked. You both turned on a dime. You almost fell off the bed with the speed you were trying to get off Dalton. He still had his hand on your cheek and it fell just as quickly as he had put it there. 

“Yeah we’re fine.”

“Totally okay!” 

Your voices overlapped into a scrambled mess. 

“You’re still floating away?” Renai asked. She hadn’t heard anything about that. Josh was still grounded, as far as she knew. Dalton shook his head. 

“Not often,” he promised. “I think being back home triggered something.” He rubbed his eyes. “But I’m fine. We have a system.” 

“Yeah, just in case. I can usually tell because he starts to move things around when I’m sleeping,” you explained. “The door usually opens.” Renai nodded. She parted her lips, the fear dissipating. You had it handled. 

She was impressed. 

“Is that why you’re in the same bed then?” she questioned, eyebrow raised. Dalton rolled his eyes but you had the heart to laugh. 

“Sure mom.” Her gaze lingered. 

“You sure you’re alright? Do I need to quiz you on something?” she asked. 

“I’m fine,” Dalton promised. “No demons here.” 

“None over here either,” Josh promised. Renai scoffed. 

“Good to know.” She turned back towards the two of you. “It’s late. Get some sleep and stay in your shoes okay?” Dalton nodded quickly. She left the door wide open as she turned to leave but not after giving you one last look. 

“We could’ve used a system,” Josh mumbled. 

“Maybe we should get one,” Renai concluded. 

You turned back towards Dalton. 

“She let you stay.” 

“Yeah well, I think that was the astral projecting.” You laughed a bit. You were still reeling from the fear, even though you were trying not to show it. 

“Wanna grab a midnight snake or something? Just to shake off the demons?” He smiled, thinking of kissing you in his kitchen, the privacy something he wasn’t used to.

“I would love to.” 

[maryp50]

https://www.tumblr.com/maryp50/764727605136097280?source=share

im curious to know what your thoughts on this scene were!

Hi anon! Okay, so don't come for me, but my thoughts and feelings about that scene in particular, and Lindsay in general, are not exactly on the positive side. Also, I'm not the best at articulating my thoughts about my blorbos so this might be a jumbled mess.

So anyways, that scene is really irritating to me because Lindsay has the audacity to ask Brian if he's gonna be alright without Justin when she's the one who orchestrated his going to NYC. Like, yes, I know that Brian and Justin are both adults and made this decision together. But frankly they were pushed into it, specifically Brian. Justin had already told her New York wasn't his dream, that he could paint anywhere, and Lindsay didn't like that answer. So she makes sure Brian knows about the article, which btw, one glowing article in one trade magazine does not a career make, but I digress. She knows the way Brian feels about success and money and making something of oneself and she thinks Justin's wrong and she knows Brian will figure out a way to make him go. And on top of that, she's taking Gus away! So yeah, that scene is upsetting to me that Lindsay asks this of Brian when she's a big part of him losing two people he loves most, Justin and Gus.

I realize that Brian is a big boy and makes his own decisions. But a lot of them are made with the idea that he is unlovable and should not be anyone's first choice when opportunity lies ahead. Especially when it comes to Justin. And Justin knows this about Brian, and he is also very aware of how Brian feels about success and money and building a career, which is why I believe he didn't show the article to Brian himself. He knows Brian's gonna push him to go and he doesn't want to, at least he didn't the two times the article is mentioned by Lindsay and then by Brian in that cute scene at the end of 5x12.

This next bit isn't about that scene anymore, I did warn you I ramble lol, but I don't think Brian and Justin should have got married, at least not at the time of the end of the show. Maybe down the line. But how can they get married when neither of them discussed, not even once, what marriage meant to them. Like what are Justin's expectations for marriage, specifically being married to Brian? What are Brian's? It would have been nice to have seen a convo between them about that, and it didn't even need to be something long and drawn out, I'm sure a few minute scene would have sufficed. Because they were both assuming a helluva of a lot of shit that other wanted from, or thought about marriage, without discussing it at all. And that contributed to the "that's not love, that's sacrifice" BS that Brian spouts (I say BS because, yes Brian, sometimes one does need to make sacrifices for love), and Justin going to NYC.

So, yes I know there are other issues at play with the decision for Justin to go to NYC, and that Brian and Justin make this decision for themselves, but imo the seeds were planted by Lindsay. Because she apparently knows what's best for Justin, even tho Justin is also a big boy and had his mind made up before she meddled.

Sorry this took so long, I had to gather my thoughts and then typing this all out took a lot longer than I thought it would lol.

[faust-the-enjoyer]

Anonymous asked: I saw your post of Keegan and colonel reader. I need that man fuck up or just do soemthing wrong. Got colonel real made and has to apologise and all that. Iykyk Thanks!

A Stupid, Stupid Mistake

Tags/warnings: fem!reader, older!reader, colonel!reader, mention of guns, mention of slight injury, light angst, cursing.

A/N: Sorry for taking a long time to answer anon! was unbelievably busy! Also! I DON'T know what you mean lol.

Divider by: @/saradika-graphics

"Sergeant Russ, they could've gotten seriously hurt.", you look at him calmly, this was the first time he fucked up in a couple of years, and now he's sitting in front of you quietly, looking at your hands resting on your desk in front of you, unable to look you in the eyes and only doing so every now and then out of respect. He was assigned to train and supervise some soldiers on how to use shotguns, and while he was looking away for three seconds, some idiot accidently shot another soldier in the leg.

"I looked away for only a second or two Colonel, and he managed to shoot another soldier...", he rubbed his temples quietly then sighed, "I'll keep my eyes on them more next time, it won't happen again, I can assure you that.". You sigh and shake one of your legs from under the table, "You got lucky this time Sergeant, the bullet didn't penetrate the kid's leg, could've been worse...", he nods at your words.

You lean back into your chair, sighing for the millionth time this week, it's the same shit over and over again, soldiers fucking up and hurting each other too many times to count in one week. "Ma'am...", he looked at you quietly, you knew that firm tone very well, "It won't happen again, I'll make sure to watch over them more carefully next time, and I'll make sure to tell the others to do so as well, you don't have to worry, and...I'm sorry.", you nod quietly, and with the flick of your wrist, you tell him to leave, "You're off the hook this time Sergeant, go back to your duties.".

As he left the room and walked in the hallway, his ears started to grow a little red, it's been so long since he's been in trouble that he felt like a rookie for a painful second, the embarrassment running through him with no sign of stopping, it didn't make it any better that it was you who talked to him. Though as he always does, he hid everything he felt when he left your office, but the words remained heavy on his tongue, "I'm sorry."...one issue though, he can't hide anything from his buddies.

Hesh and Logan look at him as he walks into the break room, and as soon as he walks in, they didn't let him breath; Hesh bombarded him with questions, and lightly made fun of him like a true friend would, meanwhile Logan gave him the most teasing looks, the "I know what you did." looks, then quietly asked him, "How did it feel? Being scolded by her, I mean.", gaining a grown from the tired, tired, sergeant.

[infiniteorangethethird]

hellou hi i have a question if you don't mind :]

so, i have been considering using the loveless label for a while because i relate to y'all heavily but there's one issue. while i don't think i experience love for other people in a way loving folk seem to describe love..? i very much want to BE loved

this is probably tied to my NPD, both the loveless and the needing love parts

basically my question is - can you still be considered a loveless aro(ace, apl etc.) if you desire to be loved (w/o being able to reciprocate)?

sorry if it's a stupid question because maybe it defeats the purpose? idk. i've searched all of the internet and couldn't find anything even close to an answer tho so yeah :')

hi anon, my apologies for taking so long to reply 😭 I don't have an excuse besides a somewhat busy schedule and "I suck at replying at reasonable times sometimes" lmao

Short answer: yes.

Long answer: the good thing about the loveless label is that it's deliberately meant as a very fluid and dynamic label, defined by its user first and foremost. Some people call themselves loveless because they don't feel love at all, while others may use it because the love they feel does not seem to fit societal expectations, or even because they do feel love, but it's not as intense/special/important to them as society deems it to be.

All of these are just examples, but it illustrates the many ways one can interpret this label for themself. If you feel it is a good descriptor of your experiences and you feel comfortable using it for yourself? Go for it! (And welcome to the community <2)

As someone who works to deconstruct the romanticized idea of love, though, I can't help but make a note on the "wanting to be loved" part. (To be clear: this is NOT a jab at you, anon, nor at anyone who might be feeling similar; moreso thoughts and advice you can chew on if you'd like, or ignore if you don't.) In a lot of people's minds, there's a very strong connotation between "love" and "any kind of positive treatment", and as such I think it's worth asking ourselves: what do I mean when I say I want to be loved? Do I want them to feel a certain way about me, to act a certain way around me? What kind of treatment am I expecting of people who say they love me?

Love is a very individual thing, and knowing what you mean by love can help both in figuring out those expectations and in communicating them towards others. It also helps deconstruct the idea that "action made from love = good & action made not of love = bad". People who love you can still hurt you (hence why it's good to know what treatment you want, besides being loved), and people can still act good to you without love being a motivating factor behind it.

I hope this helps!

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

i know you will have a lot of messages about liam's death and won't presume i will be the first or last place you hear about it, but wanted to send a personal note to you specifically.

i followed you on and off when i was in the thick of my 1d fandom. i often do not agree with you as i do not believe many things you do. (but one reason why i appreciate your perspective is that i do think you would endorse me having my own opinions and interrogating those opinions regardless of what someone on the internet says.)

i haven't been on your blog in years. (i got a job i like in public service, and it keeps me busy, so only occasionally do i think about 1d.)

when i saw what happened to liam (who was, for a very long time, my favourite member) i found myself typing in your name.

this morning (my time, a few hours ago), i had spoken at length to my friends about my feelings that i had put so much time and care behind an abuser. (i am a survivor of dv, so that makes it even more painful.)

i also talked about my guilt over still feeling defensive about some aspects of liam's life (particularly the way he was piled on when he was just a little stupid or made jokes people didn't want to understand). i felt guilty for clinging to a belief that he was a good person who experienced addiction and mental health issues and that his story is tragic in so many ways.

(i will never forget how he spoke about drinking excessively for his boss photoshoot, the one where he was in his underwear. that, to me, will always be emblematic of how desperate he was and how sick.)

i'm rambling from the grief, but i thought you would help me make sense of this, and it didn't take much scrolling through a search for liam on your blog for me to find the post about abusers not being cackling evil masterminds.

i think it's really going to help me work through everything i feel. multiple stages and kinds of grief. so i thank you for still being here when so many already left, and i hope you are well, even though i know so many of us are not.

Thanks so much for this anon. It's so lovely that you let me know that you thought of me and shared your thoughts. It's awesome that you like your job and I'm really sorry for the guilt you experienced.

I really appreciate hearing your complex feelings - it helps me make sense of my own.

I had tried to answer honestly when anons had asked me how I was responding to Liam once Maya had described how I treated him. But I'm realising that there was a lot going on that I hadn't really processed. When I talked and thought about my response - I focused on what I was doing - how I was posting what I reblogged and not really my feelings.

I had so much affection for Liam - after Harry and Louis he was the one I responded to the most. The way he would just say things was charming, hilarious, and terrifying at different times (it's where my URL comes from). He was so transparent about wanting to follow the rules and wanting to make everyone happy - and hated when they were impossible individually and also conflicted. And I responded to that both as an observer and as someone else who had that very human reaction (I've been wondering if people who mention his desire to make people happy in their statements are intending to draw the connection between that need and the distress he felt.). My 'Oh Lima' tag - I think reflects the combination of responses I had to him.

That affection withstood a lot. There aren't many people who said they were voting Boris Johnson in the 2019 UK election - where my response was anything but life long range. But what he said was so absurd - and so compatible with the other ridiculous political statements he'd made - all I did is move him down on the list of objectively worst members of 1D and keep tagging things 'Oh Lima'.

I wasn't naieve. I knew there was a high risk that he was hurting people, particularly women he was having sex with. I've said as much at various points. I knew that there's a risk with any men, particularly touring musicians, and particularly people whose coping mechanisms for their distress are destructive.

So I wasn't surprised when Maya described how she'd been treated. I stopped allowing to respond publicly to Liam in that mode. But that didn't resolve or change how I felt. Years of affection, built up through empathy, just sat alongside the knowledge about what he'd done. I think that was a fine response - I had other priorities this year than resolve what I thought about Liam Payne. I think part of my inability to articulate anything immediately after his death was because existing tension.

It's really natural to feel guilty - but I hope you feel like you don't need to. I didn't feel guilty about my reaction to some of the pile ons about Liam. I hated the way that people felt righteous about making fun of everything he did. It matters if someone chases their girlfriend with an axe - it doesn't matter if someone does cringey dancing at the concert - and treating those as the same is incredibly trivialising with violence. I thought the response to him on Logan Paul's podcast was all about people pretending their desire to make fun of people was righteous.

His story was tragic. I knew one of the things that I was observing and responding to was Liam's distress. But that didn't make it easy to reconcile my what I'd seen, and his responses to distress that he'd hidden until recently. Learning to hold the line about the harm people do, and process our connections to them and understanding of their humanity - is an ongoing process for all of us.

I think it's really normal for our response to this to be multi-staged. What it brings up will be different for everyone. I'm still trying to understand what it means for me (I've realised since his death that wanting to keep everyone happy and follow the rules is causing a lot of my stress at work. And I probably identified with Liam more than I knew). I'm so glad you found my tumblr in this moment and that it was useful.

Everything you say here sounds very wise. It is a process. It's OK.

[infiniteeight8]

I don't know if you are familer with this trope but:

Guide and Senital ironstrange

Anon, not only am I familiar with this trope, I wrote the tumblr post that quite a few people have used to explain it. 😀

I can actually rationalize Stephen and Tony in either role, but I decided to go with the most obvious (to me, anyway) version. This time, anyway! 

This is also a “Sentinels and Guides are known” style AU.

-

Tony tries very, very hard not to use his senses at all. 

It’s not that he doesn’t want them. He may have issues, but they aren’t those particular issues. He’d be happy to lean into those genetic advantages if, in his case, they outweighed the risks. Which they don’t. Three Sentinel and Guide centers (his local California Center first, then the California State Center, then the New York Center) all agree that Tony is, quote, “unusually susceptible to zone outs.” 

Which more or less means that damn near anything can tip him into one, and damn near nothing can get him out of one. Pepper, despite being so weak a Guide she only just registers on the test, is the best at getting him out of them. Given a quiet place and about half an hour undisturbed, she can get him back about half the time. The rest of the time, there’s nothing to do but wait. He usually comes out of a zone after four or five hours. Usually.

Once, he had to be put into care in the S&G Center for three days.

No one enjoys that, least of all Tony. So he does his best not to give his brain the opportunity to hyperfocus, and he meets the Guides the Center sends to match with him, and he tries not to envy the Sentinels who can snap out of a zone with a few words from the right person. 

Unfortunately, Tony’s work regularly involves intense focus on very small objects. Soldering a circuit board is legitimately dangerous for him, but like hell he’s going to give the job to someone else, especially when it concerns the armor. He tells himself that even when FRIDAY warns him against such work while Pepper is out of town.

The tiny…

…details… 

…swallow… 

…him.

.

.

The low rumble of a voice. A warm hand holding his, trembling faintly. The scent of tea and dust and something like but unlike ozone. It’s the scent that Tony follows back into the world. Blinking, Tony carefully straightens up from where he was hunched over his work bench. He doesn’t feel sore, which is unusual.

“Tony?”

Tony turns to find Stephen Strange sitting next to him, eyebrows knitted in concern. Tony clears his throat, but it doesn’t feel dry. “Yeah, I’m here. How long was I out?”

FRIDAY answers, “Fifteen minutes. With Ms. Potts out of town, I considered calling the S&G Center, but Doctor Strange is a registered Guide and I decided he was more likely to respond quickly.”

“You did good, FRIDAY,” Tony reassures her automatically, and then really registers her words. He turns to Strange. “You got me back in fifteen minutes?”

“More like ten, once I got here,” Strange says. “I’m sorry, it shouldn’t take that long.”

“That long?” Tony laughs. “Strange, that’s the fastest anyone has ever gotten me out of zone out in my entire life. That’s assuming they even can get me back. Are you bonded? Tell me you’re not bonded.”

Strange lets out an incredulous huff of laughter and shakes his head. “I’m not bonded,” he says. “And to anticipate your next question, yes, I’m amenable to a courtship.”

“Amenable,” Tony snorts, but he’s smiling. “Fantastic. FRIDAY, is there paperwork? If there is, get it started.”

Strange looks bemused, but in a good way, like he’s enjoying the ride. It’s a good sign, Tony decides.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Sending this because I think Tumblr might’ve eaten it, but did you ever receive a request for the TADC crew with a small, but EXTREMELY feisty S/O? Tumblr has a bad habit of eating my asks when I’m on anon I’ve found. 😭

TADC crew w/ a short and feisty reader!

hello hello anon! im so so so sorry for not seeing this sooner :( i truly did not mean to take so long to answer this! rechecking through my inbox, i dont see the original request :( but ill be answering it here so not to worry! getting silly by hopping onto my laptop/computer since its in the dining room rn and this way i can keep an eye on my macarons (literally not baking them, drying them out before i do and i wanna make sure no one touches them)

CAINE:

honestly in the most blunt way possible i think he might actually be into it. he always liked him someone who has a little bite in them (and by always he means like, when he first met you because its highly likely youre his first partner)

if you get all riled up trying to defend him he might comically tug on the collar of his shirt, of which steam will stream out of... doesnt have much of a preference for height, but with you being on the shorter side it makes carrying you around a little less awkward!

POMNI:

absolutely taken aback when you just let it rip one day and you go off on someone (most likely jax lets all be real here for a minute), just stands there appalled before you eventually calm yourself down and turn your attention to her

not to yell at her, she hasnt done anything wrong

honestly... nervous anxious ball x angry defender is probably another trope of mine that i think about every so often, but honestly i love it so so much. thats literally just the embodiment of you and pomni's dynamic

not much to say here unfortunately </3 just that you tend to defend her when things get ugly and you dont tend to stop until the issue is resolved

RAGATHA:

honestly maybe im biased for ragatha because ive grown on her since ive opened requests, but i think that she would be the queen of getting you to chill out when something has you all riled up! is so so kind and doesnt make fun of your height, i mean its not like you or anyone can change it. very good at not making you feel less than for being shorter than nearly everyone else

holds

if you get angry on her behalf and attempt to defend her she would be so so touched, but really most things probably roll right off her back, so she just takes you and walks you away from the scene

JAX:

honestly he thinks its a little funny that you get so worked up over things! probably calls you an ankle biter as a joke, which might make you a little mad. definitely picks you up by the scruff or the back of your shirt or whatever! really any equivalent of that works! jax has an entire arsenal of nicknames for you, all based on your height and energy. he loves seeing the way your face scrunches up a little in disdain when he calls you one of those names. all in good fun, for the most part, but he might let up if its something that makes you genuinely upset...

KINGER:

okokokokok so we dont know anything about queenie (i think, i must admit i dont keep up with gooseworx at all and am only relying off of the pilot) but i hc her to also be more on the feisty side

is this relevant? really it depends, because i think kinger would be comforted by the familiarity of your attitude, but also this could be a gateway for angst because it makes him think and dwell on the loss of queenie.... up to you!

subconsciously kneels down to your height to talk to you; he doesnt mean to be rude! it just sort of happens! thinks your fierceness is endearing in its own silly way!

ZOOBLE:

probably thinks that you can get a little overwhelming sometimes. i mean yeah sure its nice to have someone in your corner whos ready to help you out but zooble seems to be the type to not seek that help out; and in fact i can easily see them getting annoyed by someone constantly speaking for them. so you guys are going to need to communicate and work on this together lest there be a build of resentment

remember guys resentment is a real thing and it can ruin so much !! communicate!!!

that aside, i dont think they would comment much on your height, they really could not give less of a flying fuck

GANGLE:

torn between having her be intimidated by you or having her also find it endearing (and perhaps even attractive? shy person liking the one who always speaks their mind, you know?) while im not writing these to be explicitly romantic, i dont quite totally comfy with the idea of intimidation in a relationship.. though this can be applied to platonic relationships too... hmm... mayhaps a mix of it all? not quite sure! probably goes to you for tips to be more bold, love the idea of someone teaching gangle to grow a backbone

similar to zooble, no comments on your height!