#also please ignore that i postes this first in the wrong blog and had to re do this

[yeagerfate]

seeing you without makeup for the first time

characters: miguel o’hara, miles morales (earth-1610), pavitr prabhakar, hobie brown, gwen stacy

warnings: none!

notes: thanks so much to @rulaineyu for letting me use this idea! check her blog out if you’re a genshin fan, her works are really well-written and entertaining! requests are open! thanks so much for all the love on my previous posts, it means so much to me!

To be honest, Miguel doesn’t even notice. You’d been as little fatigued, having been extremely overworked lately, and just decided not to. When you visited Miguel’s office, you almost wanted him to compliment you, though you knew that wasn’t what your Miguel was like. Something in his mind was telling him something was out of the ordinary, but he just ignored it. Finally, he realizes what’s actually different when he overhears you talking about it with Hobie, (he says he likes the inconsistency), and he feels so bad for not seeing it before.

The next time he sees you, he tells you that he thinks you look pretty. He doesn’t mention the make-up thing at all because he doesn’t want you to think he’s complimenting you just to please you. When your cheeks turn a little red, and you stutter when saying thank you, Miguel smiles to himself proudly.

It doesn’t take Hobie long to notice. Sometimes, he wears make-up to his concerts, so he knows the basics. It makes him happy to see your natural face for the first time. He thinks you’re beautiful, with or without make-up, and he tells you so. “Thank you,” You said. “I think you look handsome, too, with or without make-up.” He’s a bit more clingy, which surprises you, but he just likes to see you be a bit more vulnerable than usual. Hobie also enjoys talking with you about make-up, and what you like to use. He’s not new to it, but it’s always nice to get some tips so he can look perfect!

Miles can tell you’re a bit nervous about his reaction to something, but he doesn’t know what it is. He’s aware that you’re not wearing make-up, but he doesn’t think much of it. Miles is a bit naive when it comes to beauty standards and the makeup world, so he doesn’t really know how nerve-wracking it can be to not put on anything for the first time. As always, though, he tells you that he thinks you look lovely, which is always nice to hear. On a whim, he decides to ask you about it. “Are you okay? Is there something wrong? You look a little anxious.” You grin sheepishly and tell him you were just nervous about his reaction to you not wearing make-up for the first time because of the asshole boyfriend you had before him. Good luck! Miles will not be leaving you alone for the next week at minimum :)

Even though he doesn’t wear it, Pavitr loves makeup, so he definitely notices. As always, he gushes about how beautiful he thinks you are. He holds your face in his hands and studies the natural shade of your lips, your natural eyelashes… he thinks you’re a beauty. Like Hobie and Miles, I think he’d also be a bit more clingy and affectionate. The next time Pavitr comes back to headquarters, he raves about you to Miles and Hobie, who are both happy for him and a little uncomfortable. Oh well. They’ll just have to hear about it until he goes back home!

Gwen has done your makeup multiple times, for fun and for parties, so she knows. She’s already stopped wearing makeup around you occasionally, and you were extremely supportive, so she wants to be the same for you. However, Gwen is always a bit shy when it comes to vocalizing how she feels, so she’ll feel a bit anxious. She doesn’t want you to think you look ugly without makeup, but it’s a bit nerve-wracking for her to say what she wants so say. Eventually, she gains the courage to do so, and the way your eyes brighten when she does tell you how pretty she thinks you are is something priceless.

[pinkvaquita]

TRADE. I MEANT TRADE.

Sooooo about that tarde? OwO /no pressure tho

tarde? im sorry i dont understand :[

[babyjakes]

in the middle of the night. [blurb.]

〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉

event | kinkmas 2023

prompt | somnophilia

pairing | dark!stepdad!pete brenner x reader

warnings | stepcest (stepdad!pete is sooo sleazy.) soft dark!pete. reader is giving innocent vibes. noncon + somnophilia (reader is asleep.) age gap (reader is college age, pete is 40+.) slight daddy kink (pete refers to himself as such.) nipple play. fingering. oral (f receiving.) forced orgasm. squirting.

word count | 913

an | this is my first time writing pete brenner so please be nice!! i hope you all enjoy <33 he's so sleeeazzy, i need him :'))) also i'm just making as many taylor references as i can at this point, im not sorry about it lol

Eyes trailing up your unmoving form, Pete forced himself to swallow down the low groan building in his throat. The pale moonlight pouring in your bedside window was just bright enough to give view to your perfect figure. Taking in the delicate features of your resting face, the older man swore he was laying over a sleeping angel.

He knew what he was doing would be considered wrong by most. But Pete never had too much trouble ignoring his decayed conscience. When the opportunity had presented itself, it was just too good to pass up. You were home from college for the weekend, and your mother was away on a business trip. That left you alone with plenty of time to bond with your affable new stepdad, who you had no idea was such a raging pervert beneath his friendly smile and easy-going temperament.

The man tried to keep his hands steady as he dared to pull aside the fluffy white blanket covering your unconscious frame. When he saw what you were wearing: a skimpy satin nightgown with lacey straps and little bows along the seams, Pete cursed your unfeigned innocence, "Shit, babydoll. You're not makin' this any easier for yourself."

You were a heavy sleeper; that much he knew. He had seen it firsthand a few times when you had dozed off during movie nights with your mom. He brought a careful hand up to test out the waters, gently pawing at your breast as it rose and fell with your elongated breaths. Receiving no reaction, Pete smiled. He grew a bit bolder, gently teasing his fingertips over the slight tent in the fabric where your unguarded nipple lay. The removal of the blanket was already causing a shift in your body heat, both of your tiny pebbles growing semi-hardened at the drop in temperature.

Your body twitched, your plump lips letting out a quiet sigh as his even hand moved in circles over the stiffening nub. "There. That's nice, isn't it, angel?" he hummed, his other hand venturing to the hem of your nightgown's skirt. As lightly as he could manage, he pushed the fabric up to bunch over your tummy, his eyes widening at the sight of your lacey white panties. "Oh sweetheart," he sighed, his cock throbbing in his boxers at the sight of your clothed mound, "you have no fuckin' idea what you're doing to me."

Your slumbering body was cooperative as he eased your legs apart, scooting himself up a bit as he lay flat on his stomach, his head easing up between your bare thighs. Seeing you shiver slightly, he rubbed a large hand over your legs to warm you up. "Don't worry, baby. Daddy'll take care of you. You just lie there and keep lookin' pretty." The man was practically drooling as he peeled the strip of fabric covering your precious petals away, pushing it carefully to the side. At the sight of your little cunt glistening with the smallest bit of wetness, Pete let out a muffled chuckle. "My naughty girl," he cooed, rolling your nipple a bit more forcefully now between his thumb and finger.

Your little body was rocking gently, pulses of pleasure coursing through your limbs despite your deep state of unconsciousness. Licking his lips, Pete brought both hands down to gently part your folds, exposing your leaky hole to his hungry eyes. "Oh princess," he murmured lovingly, gently prodding the tip of a finger against your itty bitty opening, "so tight down here, aren't you? Daddy'll have to be careful with you, huh baby? Be nice and gentle for my girl."

He dipped his head down, teasing the tip of his tongue in place of his finger. The taste of your sweet, slippery juices only worsened his raging hard-on. Dragging his tongue up to your tiny clit, he traced the little nub in gentle circles, his elbows coming to rest over your thighs as your hips began to buck softly. "That's it, angel. So sweet for me," his hum was slurred as he gently slipped his finger inside you before wrapping his lips around your twitching button.

He pumped his digit in and out at a steady pace, finding your tender ceiling with ease as he nursed your clit. He could feel your core warming beneath him, your poor legs starting to shake weakly as you were worked up to an orgasm in the midst of your unwavering sleep. Soft little whines began rising in your throat as you were brought to the edge by your sinful stepfather's efforts. Seeing your climax approaching, Pete pulled his lips away from your burning nub, replacing them with his thumb. He wanted to see your precious little face as you came; he wanted to watch as your orgasm was forced out of you.

Soon it was, and it hit you with more force than he was expecting. As your cunt contracted helplessly around his single finger, a wave of glistening juices sprayed out onto your printed sheets. The man's grin only widened as he carried you through your high, not slowing his ministrations until your shaking died down. Breaths staggering, you were somehow still fast asleep, pussy dripping shamelessly onto Pete's fingers and the bed below.

Exiting you slowly, he brought his drenched digit up to savor your juices as his greedy gaze remained locked on you. "Oh pretty girl," he murmured with a breathy laugh, "the fun I'm gonna have with you..."

[iniquitousyearning]

tldr: respect eachother.

this is the post i’m referring to. read this first. 🤍

there are a few different topics id like to cover here; before i begin, please know that i am coming wholly from a place of respect and understanding, while also feeling the need to defend my friend. mari (@thatdammchickennugget) is one of the sweetest, full hearted individuals i have had the pleasure of meeting, and she did not deserve to be spoken to like that.

most important; respect.

the fact i even have to reiterate this fact is disheartening in itself, but, please: give respect, get respect. at the heart of this fandom, we are all here for the same reason. to read and write for characters we love. it seems that sometimes, perhaps we forget this fact and we focus too much on the analytics of it all.

i understand the frustration, i too was once a new writer and can promise you the feeling is not lost on me. you are valid for having these feelings, but there is a right and a wrong way to go about it.

there simply has just been too much hate in this fandom lately. there are tensions for all sorts of reasons. shaming and mocking people for making friends and fostering safe spaces is not how this fandom has ever operated. ‘big blogs’ are humans with feelings, the exact same as you, and to immediately assume the reason they aren’t reading or reblogging your fics is because they don’t want to support anyone except their friends is an unfortunate stance to take; given it’s simply not true.

perhaps you may be forgetting that there are real lives behind these screens. lives with traumas and grief and heartache and stress. not actively reblogging every fic we come across doesn’t equate to not wanting to support, it may just simply mean that we’re going through some shit and don’t have the time to read as much as we’d like to.

for new writers, a side note;

if you’re a new writer, you need to assess within yourself why it is you’re writing. there’s going to be low points, topics or themes not as highly sought. low notes do not depict your worth, and to point fingers at others because they’re not supporting you the way you want them to, screams to me, someone who is writing for all the wrong reasons.

interactions and reblogs are so fucking appreciated but shouldn’t be the root of why you are doing what you’re doing. i write for tom more than anyone and his fandom is the smallest aside from blaise. the amount of writers that actively reblog my fics is very very low, and that’s okay. no one owes me or you anything.

i’m going to wrap this up by saying this; over half of my mutuals are small blogs or nonwriters. i have made majority of my mutuals on here by interactions alone, wether it be me searching for fics or them commenting on mine. it’s easy to make friends, it’s easy to find those supports, you just have to reach out.

i will always encourage every single one of you, to send me your fics, to tag me in them, whatever the hell you want to do. it’s hard to be everywhere at once. i have always been loving and welcoming and inclusive to everyone, i know all of you know this. if anyone wants my support, do not ever be afraid to ask it. i will not bite you, i will not ignore you, i will not tell you to get lost.

reach out. i’m here. 🤍

[himexyandere]

Leaves Fall Just Like Us

Pairing: Yandere Male!Spider x Female!Reader 

Word count: 1750

Content Warning(s): Possessive behavior, manipulation, drugging (via venom), nonconsensual groping, slight mindbreak 

A/N: So this is my first post on this separate, yandere-centered blog, I hope y'all like it! 💗 (Also, our ML's name is pronounced like "rain")

You weren’t sure how or even when you managed to get yourself lost in a mansion, which you originally assumed to be abandoned. That assumption of yours was swiftly proven false as you noted that no part of the mansion looked neglected. Aged, yes, but there were hardly any specks of dust to be found.

In contrast to the cleanliness of the place, there were spiderwebs in almost every corner, nook, and cranny that you’d laid your eyes on. The afternoon sun illuminated most of the space, but you could tell that based on the burnt oranges and light pinks decorating the marble floors, the light was fleeting and wouldn’t last for much longer. 

You had to leave—now. 

As soon as that singular thought crossed your mind, you began to backtrack immediately, feet seemingly on autopilot. You didn’t make it three steps back before you ran into something solid, eliciting a surprised-sounding grunt from whatever you’d collided with. Ignoring the fear sirens blaring in your mind, you whipped around without a second thought, only to come face-to-face (or more like face-to-chest) with a human. Or at least, that was what you would’ve liked to say—

Your eyes scaled the figure, just barely flitting to the side as inhuman appendages flooded your peripherals, continuing upward until you were gazing into the eyes—multiple pairs of eyes—of what you assumed to be a man-spider...? You were screaming before you knew it, which caused the humanoid spider’s eyes (all eight of them) to widen as he raised his arms surrenderingly, dropping a book he had been clutching onto in the process. 

“Please, don’t be afraid!” He rushed to calm your fright while attempting to make himself look as disarming as possible; which, of course, wasn’t an easy feat as he was an intimidating height equipped with six pedipalps sprouting from his back and chelicerae framing his face. “I mean you no harm, I swear!” 

“W-who—” Was all you could manage to say in response as your body trembled of its own accord. 

The man-spider gave you a little smile then took a small step back to give you some more space. That didn’t really help, though, because now you could see just how tall he really was. For the most part, he was built like a normal, human man — if it weren’t for the obvious spider-esque parts, of course.

“My name is Raigne,” The man before you canted his head a little to the side. “May I ask what your name is, my guest?” 

“[Your Name]...” You offered him your name without a second thought, leading you to wonder if it was out of politeness(?) or innate fear. Perhaps it was a mixture of both? 

Then, as if you’d only remembered where you were and that you were indeed an active participant in this conversation, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you looked at Raigne. 

“Wait, ‘guest’..?” He’d referred to you as “his guest” mere moments ago, but getting over the bizarreness of the situation was difficult, admittedly.  

“Well, yes, you are in my home. That makes you my guest, doesn’t it?” The smile on Raigne’s face widened a touch. “Though it appears we’ve gotten off on the wrong foot, dear [Your Name]. Tell me, how did you end up here?” 

Honestly, you were just as confused as he was. You remembered traveling with a group of explorers to find abandoned structures for an ongoing research project the lot of you were participating in, only to end up in this unfamiliar place. You were alone and there were no signs of your group. At one point, you tried writing it off as a convoluted dream until you came to realize that pinching yourself did not result in you waking up. 

After racking your brain for a suitable answer to give the man, whose home you’d unknowingly intruded into, you eventually came up with nothing. “I… Don’t remember…” You felt bad, but you didn’t want to lie. 

Fortunately, Raigne was pretty understanding and instead offered you a sympathetic smile. 

“That’s perfectly alright, I’m sure the answer you’re looking for will come with enough time,” He said before bending at the waist to pick up the book he’d dropped. “In the meantime, would you mind coming with me, [Your Name]? Regardless of how you got here, I would still like to treat you as a guest, if you don’t mind.” 

As apprehensive as you were to trust a complete stranger, (never mind the fact that he was, well… A spider) you didn’t see any other choice at the time being. After a few moments, you gave him a nod and a hesitant smile. 

“S-sorry, thank you for having me, Raigne…” 

The smile returned to Raigne’s face, wider than before in a way that seemed unnatural, accentuating his chelicerae. 

“Please, it is my pleasure, [Your Name].”

You’re unsure of how much time you’ve spent with Raigne. Days? Weeks? Months? At this point, it very well could have been years, but you had no way of knowing, nor did you really care to. He provided you with a room, clothes, food, and entertainment — what more could you ask for?

Being with Raigne was a pleasant experience as well, once you overcame your initial fear of him. He was polite and accommodating, on top of understanding. He knew how scary spiders could be, so he took the time to ease your worries by reassuring you with some spider facts. 

“Most male spiders don’t bite, nor do they produce much venom, so you’ll never have to worry about that!” Was what he told you in response to you asking if he was a venomous spider.

His answer brought you a sense of relief, and you noticeably began to relax around him afterward. Not only was Raigne a gracious host, he was also an interesting person overall to conversate with and you found yourself enjoying his company quite a bit. 

As you sat with Raigne in his study enjoying a cup of coffee and chatting idly, your gaze was drawn outside the window behind him as the movement from a falling brown leaf caught your attention. 

“Huh… Looks like it’s gonna be autumn soon.” You remarked as you swirled your finger around the rim of your now-empty cup. 

Raigne stopped talking and followed your gaze out the window, staring in silence as the frequency of falling leaves increased. His odd shift in behavior should’ve been the first sign that Raigne was feeling… Off. 

After your conversation, Raigne quickly retired to his room with the excuse of “feeling a little under the weather”, and shut his door without another word. It couldn’t have been something you said, right? Your conversation up until that point was light, amicable… So what the heck was up with him? You figured you could wait until later to ask him, since now seemed to be a bad time. 

Later that night, after getting ready for bed, you decided to go back to Raigne’s room and check on him. 

“Raigne? Are you in there?” You called out softly after knocking on his door twice. 

No response. 

You pressed your ear to the door, only to realize that it was already open. You pushed your way in, worry clouding your senses as you scanned the dark room. You’d only been inside Raigne’s room a handful of times before this, but for some reason, it was a little more… Foreboding during the night. 

“Raigne..?” You tried calling him again as you stepped fully into the room, looking around the spacious area to find him. 

A soft click sounded from behind you, but it was already too late. 

Before you could even think to turn around, you were wrapped up in a familiar pair of arms and pedipalps, holding you rigidly in place until you felt a pair of fangs sinking into your neck. Then came the injection of an unidentified fluid—venom, you presumed, even in your stunned state. Who else could it be but Raigne clutching your body, back flushed with his chest as he bit you?

“I’m sorry, [Your Name],” Were the first words out of his mouth once he was through with the envenomation, followed along by a low chuckle. “You’re sweet, did you know that? A little too trusting as well… But that’s what I love about you.”

Raigne then nuzzled into the crook of your neck, right next to the spot where he’d sunk his pincers into you not mere seconds ago. 

“W-why, d’you…” Your question was slurred and delirious-sounding, which only made Raigne coo at you in the same affectionate way one would do to a cute, struggling kitten. 

“Hmm? Do you mean to ask why I’m biting you when I told you that male spiders typically don’t?” You couldn’t even nod, but he seemed to know that he’d hit the nail on the head. 

“Well, my dear, I did tell you that most male spiders don’t bite… I never said that I didn’t,” Raigne chuckled again, still nuzzling against you. “Oh, and about the venom… It isn’t lethal, don’t worry. Why in the world would I want a dead bride? I’m a spider, not a specter~” 

As he continued speaking, the frequency of his nuzzling increased, and you still found yourself unable to move a muscle. Your entire body was paralyzed. 

“Did you know? Autumn is the mating season for most spiders,” Raigne’s unoccupied hands began to wonder then, starting from your shoulders and trailing down to your breasts. “I was wondering how I should court you... I truly apologize for not doing it properly, but I really could not help myself!” 

He bent down closer to whisper in your ear, as if his words were much too sacred to be spoken aloud, “You are so alluring… I’m surprised by how uncouth I am behaving because of how much I want you.” 

His words took on a somewhat warbly tone, entering into a raspy, dreamy-like pitch. It didn’t help that he was still groping you, hands eager and thorough in their exploration of your chest. In his mind, he had all the time in the world to do so, after all — and it wasn’t like you would be going anywhere anytime soon, what with his pedipalps still holding you and his venom in your blood.

Raigne fully intended to make you his bride.

Once that thought crossed your hazy mind, the idea of freedom slowly slipped away until you could think of nothing else...

[fatsamsgrandslamspeakeasy]

Some warnings before you venture further  - - - 

1) This is your first, last, and only warning about content on my page.  If you do not like conservative views or are a liberal, you have been warned and I accept no responsibility for your interpretations, right or wrong, about items I post because frankly, IDGAF.  This includes my views on abortion, LGBTQ, Christianity, Donald Trump, Biden and his administration, gun control, or anything else you find that offends your senses.  Grow up buttercup, the world does not care about your feelings, and that goes double for MOI...!! 

2) If you are a minor, come back when your are over the age of majority in your locality.  If I catch you on here, I will block you for all eternity from access to my page!!

3) My views are somewhat controversial on some topics, so if you come across something that offends your fine sensibilities, just keep scrolling because I really do not care about liberal comments and you will not get a rise out of me because guess what – I DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR PRECIOUS FEELINGS!! I would also respectfully remind you to simply ignore my offending posts the way you have ignored the obvious corruption in our government under Biden's watch.

4) If you want to make a keen observation with a conservative viewpoint and/or would like to have an adult discussion about a post without resorting to name calling, please feel free to message me.  Otherwise, just shut your yap and keep scrolling.  I like to have discussions that are respectful and bring out points without being called names. However, if you insist on being an asshole, please know that I can be 100X the asshole you can be. You will find out very quickly that it's a hell of a lot easier to jump on, than it is to jump off!

5) If you try to hit me up for donations for the Palestinian cause, you are so wasting your time. These will be deleted post-haste! Why, you ask??? Simple: I remember only too clearly when the news came back on on September 12, 2001, the live footage of the Palestinians in Gaza, and muslims in Libya, Lebanon and other nations in the Mid-East proudly burning the American flag and openly celebrating the destruction of the WTC Twin Towers and the deaths of thousands of American citizens. YOU made the choice then to have me as your eternal enemy and so you and your cause can go take a flying fucking leap into the void......

6)  I am an older man (early 60’s) and happily married to my wife.  I’m not here for hookups.  I had to put this out there, believe it or not, because there is a whole brand of females out there that are attracted to older men. And if you are a scammer, using a pretty face to try to solicit $$$ from me, WOW!! did you choose the wrong blog. I ain't no love-starved kid looking to get laid. You won't get a red cent so move along....nothing to see here!

7) I write like I speak!!!! And, I speak 3 languages fluently: Brooklynese, Sarcasm, & Profanity.

8) I am a HUGE fan of JAWS, PAUL WILLIAMS, DARK SHADOWS, UNIVERSAL MONSTERS, BONANZA, ABBOTT & COSTELLO, LAUREL & HARDY, THE 3 STOOGES, VINTAGE MARVEL & DC COMICS, and ANIMALS (especially DOGS) so there will be more than a fair smattering of posts on those topics.

9) I DO NOT FOLLOW EMPTY BLOGS.  If you like my stuff and want me to follow you, you need to have some content.

10) Have a nice day and stay cool out there!! 😎

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Oh god, I was just giggling so hard at howdy anons ask and your reply about reader letting König wait (sending a smooch to you both ❤️😘). He really deserves to suffer a little like that lol! Just imagining this guy, who likes to see himself as so strong and dominant, especially towards woman, slowly but surely lose his fucking marbles... And all because of that sweet little lady, who has his horniness in a bloody choke hold - not even realising the power she has over him. He's never had to show this much restraint... And he does hold back because, he even more likes to see himself as a gentlemen towards his sweetie (one who will absolutely ruin and wreck her once she let's him off his leash and takes the muzzle off). Poor little Köni.

I can see him letting out this sexual frustration at training for example. He is working these punching bags like absolutely batshit crazy. Destroying gym equipment, because he goes in so hard and has just soooo much pent up energy after every little cuddling session with sweet reader and doesn't know what to do with hit (violently masturbating after being with her hardly helps...). The other operators at the base gym just side eying him and wondering, if he now reached the final state of madness and silently prepare for the explosion that will wipe out all life on earth...

Also: we are really branching out with the toxic König brand here. First the institute, now the book club. I'm loving the growth here. Maby we can establish some kind of co working space next at toxic König headquarters, so we all have a place where we can thirst efficiently and just pump these numbers up even more for Toxic König Inc. (TKI). I can see an involvement in the stock market by next quarter at this growth rate. Maby some Tupperware-esk door to door sales to get more people hooked on to toxic König? (ok, that sounds to much like a cult now...)

Haha this is so crazy, all I wanted was to make Ghost happy, get him laid, perhaps even get him married… but here I am, 6 months later, having this blog and wondering which content warnings to slap on another König post where we discuss his obsession with virgins and their mythical hymen blood 💕

He destroys the punching bag (RIP) and somehow manages to rip the pull up bar from the concrete wall. His deadlifts can be heard all the way to the mess – envious rookies would say König is doing it wrong, that it's a major error in execution, but the veterans know better... This crazy lunatic is simply having trouble with women (again).

But you know what would make König nearly faint?

When sweet innocent reader finally allows his hands roam a bit!

He's allowed to caress her waist as they cuddle, she even lets him bring his huge palm on her tits – it feels like the most erotic thing ever, just to paw those soft breasts over her shirt. And what happens next is that she rolls her hips – König holds his breath – she's actually pressing her ass against his cock. Of course they're still wearing clothes, but her movements are nothing short of sexual.

It makes his brain shut down completely, but soon he's panting in her ear, grinding his groin against the swell of her ass in rhythm with her movements. She doesn't stop him when his hand slowly, tentatively shifts down, then forces its way under the waistband of her pants – ach du Scheiße, it's finally happening… Can this be real?

His fingers slip under her underwear and arrive on her soft mound. He tries to shove his hand further down and into her folds but then – Scheiße – delicate fingers curl around his wrist and pick his hand up from paradise.

"Please… I'm just not ready yet," she explains gently, and the German curses in his mind are loud and foul as König tries to catch his breath and ignore the fact that his boxers are painfully tight and now stained and wet with precum.

"Let me lick your cunt," he offers with a hoarse voice while she's still holding him by the wrist, denying access to her. "Bitte... I just want to have a taste..."

Sweet reader goes tense and turns, looks at the soldier who has a funny accent and weird mannerisms, the soldier who was supposed to be a gentleman, with parted lips and eyes wide from shock.

"König, you can't say things like that…!"

[askchilchuck]

Hey, how can I help you?

(Please read below before interacting)

Hi! My name is Sophie! This blog has gotten enough traction that I feel the need to lay some ground rules for it.

1) This blog is intended to be PG13 so I don’t have to exclude younger fans from participating. I will not be answering anything that wouldn’t fly in canon, or is adjacent to it. Anything explicitly sexual, or can be construed that way will not be answered. This decision was made a couple months in, so do be advised there is some more suggestive content on the earlier posts on this blog. If you don't want to see that kind of content, stick to the newer posts.

2) Nothing related to suicide please. I tried playing it off the first time but between myself and some people around me, even the “KYS 🥰🥰🥰” jokes really aren’t funny, especially recently. Asks including it will not be answered.

3) No firearms. Related to rule 2.

4) Please no spammy asks. I’m honestly not sure how to answer them, and they clog up both the blog itself and the main tags.

5) No political asks. I understand how terrifying the results of the US election are, but I really need this place to be a break from all that. For my sake and yours. We both need spaces where we can recharge from this. Chilchuck doesn’t know what’s going on anyway, he deserves to live in ignorance from it. I love you.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s fun to bully him, but these things cross a line for me. Thank you for understanding.

If you’re an RP blog, you’re more than welcome to interact! Even if you’re not a Dunmeshi blog! I don’t always have the time to do reblog chains, though, so please don’t feel bad if I miss you there. It’s easiest for me if you submit RP as an ask when the box is open. Sorry for any inconvenience this may cause. If you’re 18+ and interested, I also do private RP on my Discord, linked on my Dunmeshi side blog.

IN LIGHT OF DUPLICATE CHARACTERS:

I think that’s awesome and also really funny. I encourage it. We’ve already got a loose MCU/multiverse plot line going on so we can totally make it work, too. Hell yeah. Hilarious. Love that. /gen

Blog lore:

This blog takes place loosely post canon. I try to avoid spoilers, but little things here and there are inevitable. Chilchuck has made up with his wife and they’re currently working on their relationship. Chilchuck is also in therapy. This is for a few reasons.

1) I don’t think he’d actually answer any of these if he wasn’t.

2) He doesn’t talk about it a lot, but it was one of his wife’s conditions before giving the relationship another go.

3) He just. Should be in general and I have control of it so it’s happening lol

My Chil is bi, but in the middle-aged “everyone’s had gay thoughts before” kinda way, cause I think it’s funnier that way. He also gets high from time-to-time now that he’s not dungeneering anymore.

Folks kept turning him into different things/animals, so goldstar/⭐️ anon gave him an amulet to put a stop to that. "Marcus" also altered the spell on the amulet to encompass all transformations, since inanimate objects weren't initially included.

Squeaker also used a device to prevent any crab transformations specifically from occurring, as well as ejecting all crabs within a 20 mile radius.

There’s also a cult stalking him for some reason. (This is an ongoing problem. They haven't hurt anyone, and they seem to only be targeting Chilchuck.)

The TVA (Marvel) is loosely involved as well as previously mentioned. Squeak fixed it (or so she thought. There's now a DMCU situation going on.)

Also, Chil’s knowledge of the blog/Tumblr varies depending on what would be funnier, but generally he’s aware of the internet. He only uses his phone to answer your asks, though. He has no idea how to do anything else and has no desire to. This means he doesn’t fact check people or knows anything about the greater internet experience. No one knows how he got the phone, or how it’s holding a charge. Don’t worry about it.

ADDENDUM:

Chilchuck has recently started googling slang, and anything else that might be confusing or annoying to him. However, he hates the search feature and trying to find answers on individual websites, and will take the AI generated answers without question.

I myself don’t talk in the main posts, unless it’s tagged #ooc. Otherwise, I’ll always talk in the tags if I’ve got something to say. Or replies. Or DMs. Main post is the only place I’m in character unless specified otherwise.

Emoji anons:

•⭐️/goldstar anon

•🦉/owl anon

•👻/ghost anon

•♡/heart anon

•🐭/mouse anon

•🍬/candy anon

•🥣/bowl (cereal?) anon

•🐻🏀/bear basket ball anon

•🃏/joker anon

•🟣/Gojo Satoru

•🪻

•🐦‍⬛

No other heart variants have been claimed. Also, heads up to all emoji anons, I’m going to start using just one tag for your asks going forward to make tagging easier! So I’ll just be using the emoji variant from here 💖

If you want to hang out with me in a less censored environment, I also run @chilfucked and @askchilchucknsfw which are 18+ only. I will ban all minors who so much as breathe on those blogs. I’m not joking.

I also reserve the right to update these rules as time goes on, so please check them again before submitting when the ask box is open again. Thank you!

[joels-shitty-puns]

The Key To Your Heart - Track 2

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Musician!Reader

Series Summary: After writing your feelings for Pedro into a song, it gains a lot more popularity than expected. Ultimately it brings both criticism and support, with new possibilities around the corner.

Series Warnings: 18+ only (MDNI). Potential for puns/dad jokes (name of my blog, and the fic) should give that away. This is my first fic which should be its own warning, lol. Also some cursing. Mentions of masturbation (f) maybe more smut later idk. Sadness, reader is pretty depressed. Poor body image. Rude people. Bullying-ish and just lack of support? Anxiety. Age gap! Reader is in her mid 20's, Pedro is current age (48).

Other stuff: Reader is plus sized. AFAB. Inexperienced. Also has a dog, but you can pretend it is another creature probably. Further, in case it isn't clear, italics almost always are the reader's inner thoughts!

Word Count: 2.8K

Series List: Here!

Miss last chapter? Here!

I had a real rough time figuring out the proper voice for Pedro's dialogue and I hope I did him justice. Either way, the support I received for part 1 is astounding and completely unexpected! Thank you all for reading and let me know what you think :) I plan to continue until the story wraps up, but I don't know how many parts that will be. I hope to post every couple days, but with my work schedule it may be less speedy. Here we go!

You walk in the door, unclipping Skip's leash, slipping off your shoes, and dropping your keys on the countertop before flopping onto the couch and unlocking your phone. No. Fucking. Way. 

Pedro Pascal (pascalispunk) replied to your message. 

You dissected each letter of the username, assuming it couldn't possibly be THE Pedro Pascal… but it was. It really, really was. You clicked the message, holding your breath.

Pedro Pascal replied to you: "Hey, you don't need to thank me. I didn't say anything that wasn't true. That guy was out of line. You deserve happiness and I'm sorry for the harsh words you've been hearing. I appreciate you sharing your vulnerability with the world and hope that you will continue to be your genuine self and ignore the comments trying to make you be someone else. Don't listen to those people."

You stared in disbelief at his words, once again wondering why he would ever be so kind to someone he doesn't even know. Someone so childish and stupid to write a song about a man she doesn't know. I can't imagine he'd think these things if he knew it was about him…

You: "Thank you Mr. Pascal. I'm a big fan of yours and hearing that you're in my corner has me completely at a loss. I can't imagine why you would risk damaging your image by defending a girl…" No… don't say girl, it makes you sound like a child. You want this guy to like you! You backspace with a slight feeling of ridiculousness over the whole scenario. Ugh it's all wrong… calm down... calm down… it's just a conversation. He doesn't know you. He doesn't like you. Don't make it weird like you always do.

You try again.

You: "Thank you Mr. Pascal. I really admire your work and for you to say such kind things to me… to think that you're in my corner, has me completely at a loss for words. I don't know what I did to deserve this treatment when you don't even know me, especially when coming to my defense could potentially harm your image… but thank you."

He read it almost immediately. Your heart was beating out of your chest and you felt like you could throw up from the anxiety and adrenaline. After a few seconds, those stress-inducing dot-dot-dots appeared to show you he was typing.

He's actually replying to me?? Again? Doesn't he have better things to do? 

Your mind wandered to what he might be doing while he's messaging you. Sitting at his home, relaxing, taking the time to reply to you? Why? Maybe he's on a plane or waiting for something and killing time. Maybe he's- *ping*

Pedro Pascal replied to your message:

"Please, you can call me Pedro.. and as far as defending you, it doesn't matter to me that we don't know each other personally. You seem like a woman with a good heart, and all you did was share your true self. Nobody deserves to be talked poorly about for something harmless that they feel. If something like that hurts my image… then my true self wasn't being represented. I think we all just want to be seen, and I hope that you will feel comfortable to be yourself and show yourself more."

You don't know when you started crying, but you hiccupped with the overwhelming wave of emotions. He sees me.. you had just scrolled to the bottom of the long reply, when you noticed the "..." of typing again. He has more to say?!

Pedro Pascal: "As far as the subject of your song.. whether you choose to reveal that to him, or the world, you deserve love and respect. Being vulnerable and putting yourself out there is a terrifying thing to do, and I myself tend to close myself off from relationships to avoid that potential for getting hurt. But if that's what you want, you've already taken a big step and you should go for it. I hope that whoever he is gives you the respect and love you deserve."

Holy crap…

He doesn't… he doesn't know it's him right?? No. There's no way. He's just being nice… he's too nice. He's too genuine..??

Your thumbs hover over the keyboard, doing a little dance in the air, pondering what to say. How much can I share with this man? Between this crush and his kind words, it's feeling tricky to hold back from spilling too much information.

You: "Thank you Pedro. You're too kind and I can't properly explain how much I really appreciate it. I'm having trouble coming to terms with all the sudden attention, and finding it hard to ground myself. But your words are helping me a lot. I - "

You hesitated over your next words, wondering if you should open up or just leave it. Don't be weird… don't scare him away like you always have with everyone else. As much as you think of disclosing your hesitation and lack of experience with relationships, as well as your reasons for trepidation, you decide to spare him of your self-hatred. Instead, you delete that last letter and hit send. 

Then you send another message, like he did. "And as far as the guy… I know I don't know him personally, we've never met, but I can already tell he would treat me right. I just hope maybe someday he will love me back."

Immediately after sending it you regretted it. That felt way too open and vulnerable. What are you thinking!?! Shit… what if he sees through you!?

You hold your finger down on the message, ready to hit unsend before he sees it. But it's too late. He's already replying.

Pedro: "He would be stupid not to love you back."

What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck

You: "Thank you, Pedro. 🥺" Play it cool… Play it cool…

Pedro: "Of course, sweetheart. Feel free to message me if anyone else gives you trouble or you just want to chat. I enjoyed talking with you."

???!!!!!?????!!!!! SweetheartSweetheartSweetheart

You grabbed your nearest pillow and screamed into it. "SKIPPPPPEERRRRRRR!!!!!! I JUST HAD A CONVERSATION WITH PEDRO AND IT WAS MAGICAL AND AAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!" You squealed.

Skipper lifted his head at you and sighed before setting his head back down. He was no stranger to your shenanigans. Napping after a good walk was a better use of his energy than to deal with your drama. He closed his little brown eyes again.

You lay back on the couch, kicking your feet and squeezing your pillow to your body.

Fuck, this is going to hit me like a truck if it goes sour. If he even realizes it's about him, probably. Crap… what am I going to do?

The next day, you woke up and checked your emails before work. Thankfully nobody at your workplace has seemed to place your singing voice to your speaking voice, or pieced together the fact that several people know you have a crush on a certain celebrity and are a musician. Thank goodness. That’s the last thing you need.

You closed your eyes for a few minutes, trying to calm your breathing, your nerves, and your heart rate, before relaxing and shaking out your body. Finally, you decided to get ready for bed and see what tomorrow brings.

Your emails come in, one by one, with one intriguing email at the top, from a well known pop-culture show called The Jazz & Ally-Kat Show. They want to do an interview with you, live, as soon as possible. 

Great. They probably just want to see what I look like or have me spill my guts about my crush. You roll your eyes, and you can’t help but feel like the Mandalorian with his lack of face reveals. If only you had a cute little space baby to accompany you. I guess Skip is my own precious cargo in a way, you think, while looking at your still sleeping pup. You're being silly… Not everything needs to relate back to Pedro, you think with a sigh to yourself. 

Yet despite your anxiety, you agreed to their interview, with the exception that it was done as a podcast style interview, where simply your voices are featured. Surprisingly, they agreed. I guess everyone likes some drama, and what better way to get views than by having a little mystery.

The interview was scheduled for three days from then, and in the meantime you focused on work and your album, which was mostly finished after years of writing songs. All it needed was some editing.

As the days went by, you wanted desperately to message Pedro again. You wanted to tell him your feelings. Have him confess that he loves you too. Ask him about his family, his friends, his favorite things. Meet him, kiss him, fall in love, and finally be happy. But ultimately you knew that was silly. You had one little conversation, and although it was nice, you still didn't know each other. There was no way he loved you back. Yet…? you asked yourself, hopeful, almost asking for permission to let yourself try and earn his love. 

Despite Instagram drawing you in like a magnet, you held back from messaging him. You didn't want to come on too strong. You messaged him first last time. He doesn't know you. Literally… he doesn't even know your real name, or what you look like. But maybe that's a good thing…

_____The day of the interview:_____

You woke up around 9:30 in the morning; nervous, slightly nauseated, restless, and jittery. Why did I agree to this??! 

You decided to pass on the coffee this morning, figuring it would make things worse, and instead decided to take Skipper for a walk. After some fresh air followed by a refreshing shower, you looked at the clock. 11:30 AM. With the interview at 1PM, you still had some time to kill and sat down at the piano, letting your mind wander to Pedro while you plunked chords out with nimble fingers. I wonder if Pedro has ever wanted to learn any instruments… I could teach him, you daydream.

Your hands dance across the piano while he reads through a script in the other room, eyebrows furrowed as he highlights another line. You look up over the grand piano and see his soft brown curls blowing under the fan haphazardly. The sun is shining in through the window, which Skip bathes under, and reflects a golden brown undertone with gray streaks in Pedro's hair. He really is beautiful, you think. His tongue swipes across his lips as he makes notes and erases, before finally feeling your eyes on him. He glances up from the script, giving you a soft smile and a wink; with those chocolate brown eyes that frequently cause you to lose your train of thought. Your eyes drift down to the keys again, feeling a soft blush creep over your cheeks. 

"That music sounds beautiful, baby.." he says softly while padding up to you behind the piano. He places his large hands on your shoulders, sweeping them down over both your arms before settling on your hands, still resting over the black and white keys. You look over your shoulder and he leans in, closing his eyes as he presses a gentle kiss to your lips. Just like that scene in Narcos… you think. Yikes, I really am obsessed… anyway… you think back to your daydream…

He sits down at the chair next to your piano bench, kissing your lips again gently, then the corner of your mouth, your cheek, and your jaw. Your stomach gives a wave of butterflies and you lean in more to kiss him deeper, tugging on his hair while his hands find the small of your back, gently running his palms up your spine. A chill overcomes you and he-

~Beep beep. Beep beep. Beep beep.~

Fuck. You snap out of your fantasy and turn off the alarm you set to go off ten minutes before the interview. At least I gave myself time to use the restroom and wash my face, you think, hoping to clear your head a bit now that you're slightly frazzled.

Unfortunately the feeling that replaced it was nerves as you sat down at your desk, typing into your keyboard, turning on your mic, and hoping that Skipper doesn't throw a fit over the wind or something while you're on this call.

Jazz: "Hi there listeners! We're joined by the artist of the moment, our favorite lovesick lady, the singer responsible for "Imaginary Love!"

Both women on the other end of the call applaud.

Well… not sure I like being called a lovesick lady but what else did I expect, really?

You: "Thank you guys for having me, I appreciate you wanting to get to know me better."

Despite the rough start, the ladies turned out to be really respectful and fun. You think that if the circumstances were different, you could actually be friends with them. You discuss casual things like your dog, your favorite activities and favorite pop culture topics (careful to avoid mentioning Pedro or any other actor that could be perceived as your lyrical subject), and they even mention celebrity crushes they've had growing up. 

At the mention of their celebrity crushes, you can feel the interview funnel into a dangerous alley with little to no escape. Jazz was the first to broach the subject. "So… we've just discussed our celebrity crushes, and I think I speak for all of us here when I say we're all very curious to know who-"

-an air horn blares-

What the hell is that? You wonder, both thankful for the interruption, yet startled by the disruption.

They both chime in: "Viewers!!! Do you all know what that sound is!?! We have reached 1 million listeners!!!!"

To say you were astounded is an understatement.

You: "You're kidding!? 1 million people are listening to us right now?"

Ally: "You bet they are! And listeners… I don't know about you guys… but I can't help but wonder if our celebrity heartthrob is one of those million?"

They turn their attention to you again. "What do you think? Think he's listening?"

You're thankful for the lack of a camera, because you can't help but blush at the thought. You'd be lying if you hadn't already considered (hoped) that he was listening too. 

Jazz: "So as we were saying… I think we all are in agreement that we want to know who he is. You sound like a nice enough girl, so what's holding you back? You've made it. You can contact him now and he'll probably reply."

I already have… you thought with a smirk.

Jazz continues: "Which brings me to the next point... I know you've had a lot of attention lately. You were signed to a record company, you were contacted by us, you've been mentioned by a few talk shows and celebrities. Pedro Pascal even publicly defended you. The radio has been playing your song nonstop and people can't get enough. What do you think of all this attention?"

You: "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a bit surprised and maybe a little scared," you answered with a nervous laugh. "But I am so thankful for the kind words that I receive and I love hearing from people who can relate to my music."

Ally: "You've certainly received your fair share of criticism too. It sounds like you received that before your song was ever published as well."

You: "I have, and it's been challenging to try and not let it get me down. But I'm trying my best, and the positives seem to be greatly outweighing the negatives," you state, your mind thinking of Pedro and how his messages were really the only positive you needed to get you through the dark storm of criticism.

Ally: "I guess what I'm wondering is.. among all these people contacting you.. has he?"

You try to play dumb: "Has who?"

Both interviewers laugh before Ally continues. "Nice try. You know who we're trying to find out about. Has he, the man of your dreams and star of your lyrics, contacted you at all? Will we see a romance blooming?"

Your stomach flipped. You were not expecting this question. Should you tell the truth??? It's not like they could know who has contacted you, short of hacking your account. You have had a lot of people contact you, after all.

You take a deep breath before answering. "I uh… I have received a lot of messages, some of them from celebrities."

They reply, and you can practically feel them leaning in. "Yeeeeaaaah?????"

You consider your next move, your heart really working overtime since this whole thing started. Finally you decide your answer.

"Yes. We've talked."

Looking for Track 1? Read it here!

Next chapter: Here!

~Thanks for reading! Stay ~tuned~ for more!

Taglist: Let me know if you want in :)

@pedrotonin @starcrossed02

[jalenay]

Nothing's Wrong with Dale - Publishing Update May 4 2024

So my work work is starting to relax - it'll be 'normal' working hours after May 15, but i'm manifesting some early additional free time (by ignoring some of the things i still have left to do) and i thought i'd give an update on my current NWWD plan to fill you guys in (if anyone wants to know) and to motivate myself to, you know, do it.

let me know what you think and if you have any questions! or if there's anything else you want to know!

So the overall plan is as follows:

First Rough Edit - this is basically just changing the POV from 2nd POV to 3rd POV. This is very tedious and currently what I'm doing right now. I'm also making a list as I go for high level updates/changes i want to make. Just thinking about the story as a whole and what tweaks i want to make now that the whole thing is finally done (primarily moving exposition around, if there's anything extra i can remove, timing of when certain things are discussed, and so on).

My Main Edit - this will be more time consuming but probably more fun as i do my main revise and edit of the story as a whole. i'll likely print the entire story out, make edits on hard copy, and then type up all the edits. I will also probably be sending the updated chapters to my main beta, for her opinion. (this would be the person i first texted about Dale in Dec 2021, she deserves first look lol)

Editor - After I'm happy with what I've done, i'll send the entire thing over to my editors, the main ones who worked on DSM. This will likely take a good amount of time (DSM took one month) but in many ways involves less effort from me lol. Just nerves.

Cover, Self-publishing Details - while my editors have the manuscript, I'll be narrowing down what I want the cover to look like and hiring a cover artist. (i've got a short list of artists right now, but i'll probably continue to refine that). I'm bad a visualizing covers and so this will be hard for me, although i have some basic ideas. i'll need to gather reference photos too and then work with the artist. I also want to publish more widely than just Amazon and will hopefully get DSM out to other places as well as a test run before NWWD. Look into more marketing? This is the most miscellaneous of the steps.

Process Edits - actually go through all the edits and notes given to me by my editor. This takes a lot of time (and is mentally taxing - no one likes to read pages of people telling you what you need to fix about what you wrote even if its overall extremely helpful and necessary)

Finalizing - I'll send the edited version to my first beta and another ARC reader/friend. I'll work on the formatting for the book. Coordinating where it will be published and when.

Publishing!

This is a loose list of steps that I mostly defined right now, but are similar to what i did with DSM. As i said, I'm in step one, currently just finished Chapter 25 of 36 of that rough edit.

I'll try to provide some updates on the process at it moves along, if people are interested in hearing about that. I'll most likely keep those updates on this blog, along with any other publishing specific commentary. if any one has any questions or thoughts on the whole thing, please feel free to send them to this blog or comment on this post.

I'm very excited to really dig into publishing NWWD and looking forward to sharing it with you!

Thanks to everyone for all their support - I wouldn't even be considering this (i probably wouldn't have even had a finished draft) with you!

[dragongirltongue]

New Pinned post <3

Hi there, the name is Zelda, or one of like, 20 other names that may or may not be listed somewhere around here. If you know a name I go by that isn't findable here don't use it. <3

I'm bigender which is made up of girl and fem6oy, as such I use she/her and sometimes he/him pronouns when I'm feeling fem6oy enough <3

I'm in my 30s, not getting more specific than that until I decide it's not true enough to change it, don't try to find my exact age as I don't like sharing that information publicly, I don't even update it on my birthday <3

I'm a polyamorous bisexual voraphile freak and if you're over 18 you're welcome to talk to me about how much of a freak I am. I love to flirt and encourage it. Also happy to share my Other Blog with anyone interested, again as long as you're of age. <3

I'm a film graduate and currently working on doing something with that experience as well as working on a superhero comic and a 2D zelda style game. Feel free to bug me about any of those I love to discuss writing and media and want to encourage media literacy. <3

I'm also an ex-jehovahs witness and as a result I'm hugely into the holiday season in a very against my old god kinda way. Also big into sinning <3

Also I'm like, a dragon in probably an otherkin/thetadelta kinda way, like, it's core to who I am and how I understand myself so yeah. Despite this my fursona is a fox, the dragon in my icon is literally me <3

I also draw sometimes and when I do it'll be posted to @dragongirldrawings but always reblogged here too.

Also I'm a member of a plural system, feel free to check out the rest of the system over here @haven-sys <3

Further on the identity weirdness I'm an imaginary friend for the person who used to inhabit this body, they've been gone for like, over 20 years so it's not really relevant but I have started embracing my nature as a fictional creation, it's comforting.

Btw, if one of my posts containing my typing quirk ends up on your dash I take no responsibility for it. I use it in posts that are for me only and if they happen to resonate with others that's their choice to reblog.

I had intended to set tipping up on my blog for a while but adhd caused me to never get around to it sooo, homebrew tip button on my original posts. Feel free and outright encouraged to steal this idea <3

So yeah that's me, hiii I love you all <3

this post is specifically a6out tum6lr user Zelda dragongirltongue [tip]

DNI list under the read more.

lmao imagine if I actually made one of those finally, that's how you'd know I've been replaced with an evil clone or something.

That being said if you're looking at my blog to send me an ask or dm about what someone gets off to please understand unless they're actively hurting someone I rly don't care. I have a lot of ignored and blocked anons about this.

This goes double if the person you're trying to alert me to is trans femme, we don't play that game here, especially given that I know I've been targetted for things as simple as engaging in vore the wrong way for some people or whatever.

Like, I just want to make it clear I rly don't give a fuck what another adult does in the bedroom, I rly don't care if the bedroom happens to include their blog and I rly don't care if they like to flirt about it with other adults on this website.

Also if your pinned post is a callout for anyone about anything it's likely to set off my paranoia around you, which is to say I will not be able to trust you if this is the case even if it's for someone who's actually a danger to a community, like, actively.

Like, this ain't a moral stance or anything, it's a mental health thing. I see that you want to make your first point of contact into a crosshair on someone else I'm gonna be scared you're gonna aim at me next even if it's completely reasonable that you'd never find anything objectionable with me. It scares me and I'm gonna spend every interaction walking on egg shells around you cos what if you're digging for dirt, like, I got no way of knowing.

Anyway as the opening joke implies I don't see any worth in having a list of things to not interact with me over cos the lived experience on this planet is so full of nuance and I've formed deem friendships with people who'd probably have avoided me if I had a DNI and they cared about it.

I think DNIs are dumb but this feels like a space to talk about some general limits on what I'm gonna put up with on this website. I'm just here for a good time with other freaks, anything else is optional. If you want to drag me into your discourse at this point then I guess this is whre I ask you to Do Not Interact. To anyone else, I love yall <3

If you've been directed here after sending an ask my way please apologize for wasting my time [here]

tl;dr DNIs are dumb but don't drag me into your personal grievances with others.

this post is still specifically a6out tum6lr user Zelda dragongirltongue [tip]

[red-riding-wood]

I’m so sorry about what happened to you and so many others. Disgusting misogynistic behavior. You all deserve so much better ):.

Also sending this bc I do believe he has made two new accounts. Drcranessweetestdoe and monsterfromthewoods. I have no proof these are him ,but it just strikes an absurd resemblance to his writing and he seemed to interact with both of them a few weeks ago. The first one hasn’t blogged in weeks either. Just seems strange. Once again though, I could be wrong. Just something for everyone to stay weary about. Stay safe ❤️

Thank you for the well wishes, anon! I really do appreciate you reaching out. <3

From my conversations with @drcranessweetestdoe, she does not behave like Kill (nor does her writing style compare to his), and I am pretty positive he is incapable (or at least very bad) at taking on different personalities since I believe I witnessed his attempt with the second account you mentioned. Aurora is very sweet, and she used to be a fan of Kill's writing and mine. I don't want people to be suspecting her of foul play because I do believe she is genuine. Kill has a pattern of reblogging fics as a way of seeing what victims he can latch onto and I see that as a coincidence with his reblog of Monster's.

As for @monsterfromthewoods... I was hesitant to make a callout, mainly because no one has actual solid proof that he is Kill. But, there is too much evidence for me to ignore, and I wanted to give my honest opinion and observations. Monster, if you are not this person, feel free to reach out and vouch for yourself, and if I am wrong, I am deeply sorry.

Fuck that. As I was typing this message up, I decided to check my DMs and noticed that my friend had said that he gave her the same name that, as of this morning, was revealed to me as his actual name along with his real picture and Facebook profile. That really sealed the deal for me. Here is the rest of my evidence to prove that this is "Kill":

Monster followed my friend around the same time that she blocked Kill.

Monster followed me the same day that I sent Kill a confrontational message, calling him out for his lies and pleading with him one last time for medical treatment and answers.

From the posts on Monster's account, and the one comment I know he made on my friend's post, his personality exactly fits Kill's. This is why I said I do not think he is capable or likely to be able to craft a believable persona.

Monster made a post about suicide, and a pro-Palestine post, the former of which Kill discussed with me a lot and the latter my friend pointed out as suspicious since Kill was also very strongly pro-Palestine. Seeing as Monster doesn't have that many posts yet on his blog, this isn't irrefutable evidence but it is very coincidental.

Lastly, I actually did my best to analyse and compare Kill and Monster's writing, since I had recalled a few things that stuck out to me when I read Kill's writing. Him and Monster share many similarities with their writing habits/consistencies. They are as follows (the examples listed are from 18+ content so please do not view if you are a minor):

Use periods and exclamation marks -- but never commas -- as punctuation to end dialogue tags.

Starter dialogue tag always facing outward. Like: ”So... Tight”

Tend to each use a snapshot style of writing, favouring incomplete sentences with frequent use of periods. Examples: K: "His mind, usually so sharp. Focused and organized like the most expensive machines. A killing machine, that worked in perpetual motion, living off killing, adrenaline used like a drug." M: "Your dear, understanding doctor. Doctor Jonathan Crane, who laughed out loud suddenly a couple moments ago. The dark colour covering his exotic looking eyes as he revealed his real nature to you."

Similarly, they both tend to avoid using possessive pronouns and determiners. Examples: K: "_ Pale, little pussy peaked from between her thighs." M: "The scars covering _ man's pale skin," _ = absence of "her, that, the," etc.

Often use adverbs after verbs in a way that feels out of place.

Capitalise after ellipses, always.

"Y/n" always has a lowercase "n".

Sometimes use three ellipses, often use only two.

Use "pants" but never "trousers".

Yeah, so, I may have spent way too much time on this. And I think most of this is redundant, now, especially after the name revelation, but still, I put work into it and didn't want it to go to complete waste lmao. I also had no idea until I was tagged today that apparently there are programs that do this sort of thing for you. Oops.

[eueuphoriaz]

So I happen to chance upon this blog which talks about the little cold war between Hange and Levi after he revived Armin instead of Erwin in the RtS arc.

Honestly, this is something which I did not delve deeper because it was just too much things happening for that whole sequence when I first watched it. After reading that analysis, and also chancing another post allegedly claiming that Hange's character is too shallow because she didnt show much emotion here when Erwin died, I just had to do something.

So, I just had to dig deeper into the manga and anime again, with the little analysis out there that highlighted Hange's character especially during that scene and decided to split this post into 3 parts, focusinf on Hange's cold war, or how she responded to Levi's decision.

Caution: Certain degree of Levihan lens is on.

--------------

Part 1: Rooftop

Part 2: Walltop

Part 3.1: Double date

Part 3.2: Double date/ Basement

---------------

Part 1: Rooftop

So, that blog talked about the difference betwen how Hange is drawn in the anime vs the manga, and I can agree that the drawing in the manga does indicate a little bit more about Hange's displeasure towards Levi for choosing Armin. I mean, she must have felt so disappointed and betrayed at the same time, after all her therapeutic talk to Mikasa to calm her down, only to lose her squad, Moblit, her commander and her eye. She lost a lot more than Levi in this battle, so of course she will be angry with Levi.

So, here are the panels in the manga which see her looking away from Levi

I also looked into Levi's dialogue at the start, when Floch questioned his decision. Here, Hange looked away while Levi looked towards Floch before talking but in the anime, both of them are looking at Erwin.

So I am guessing that in the manga, there is basically little or no interaction at all between Hange and Levi and Hange made it clear to Levi with her non-verbals. Also, I find it strange that Levi talked about forgiveness. Now, he may mean 2 things in the context of Floch questioning him:-

1) Will you forgive this guy (Levi) (direct reply to Floch but indirect expression to Hange)

Now, I know that the sub translated it as forgive him (Erwin). So I did a Google translation using speaker and microphone. And double checked that the pronounciation Google got and the one Levi said is the same. This is what I got for that paragraph.

Now, I know I am just taking the translation literally by Google and it may be way way off because of how the language is used. So please forgive me if this is totally wrong 🙏

So, Floch was questioning Levi, Hange is avoiding Levi and Levi started his speech, explaining the reason for his choice.

If he had intended to ask Floch and Hange to forgive him, this gives an early indication that he can sense the emotional impact his decision has on Floch and Hange. Indeed, Floch didnt even join in the family discussion when the Armin woke up.

2) Will you forgive this guy (Erwin)?

If he had intended to ask them to forgive Erwin for his conflicting dreams, then I find it quite weird because that would mean that he had to tell them the real motivation of Erwin's drive to led Humanity against the Titans. Would he do that to Floch who is a subordinate? He might have told Hange everything and therefore asking her to forgive Erwin (and thereby understanding his decision). Then that would mean that Levi is basically ignoring Floch as he and Hange watched Erwin take his last breathes. So Floch's "Captain why?" Is sort of a cue for Levi to start talking to break the ice between him and Hange.

Also, isnt Erwin's devil characteristics (ruthlessness, determination, etc etc) the things the Floch and Hange needed for Erwin to be revived and led the Survey Corps after the huge losses? So, why would Levi ask them to forgive Erwin?

I am confused with the language here but these are just some of my observations and curiosities.

So anyway, whether it is the manga drawing of Hange looking away from Levi, or his dialouge, it does make sense to me that there are some tension between her and Levi.

--------------

Now the other panel where the anime draw her looking at Erwin while the manga draw otherwise is when Armin come out of his titan body.

Ok, this scene should be familiar to all Levihan because remember how Levi will always stare death in the eyes when his comrades die but not at Hange in 132? This scene has been mentioned because he looked at Erwin as he die while Hange looked away, in the manga at least.

Similarly, there can be 2 reasons why:-

1) there is still tension between her and Levi and she does not want to have any interaction with him

2) or, she wanted to check that Armin's transformation is ok. Afterall, this is also the first time the Survey Corp stole the power of a titan and they may not know how the whole thing works still. But do note, that she is totally not her "Eren I want to touch that hand!" self.

Imagine Hange, having no reaction to the first time she sees a titan shifter gaining power. I think only Reiss family and the Marleyan warriors got to see that scene but Hange showed no reaction or excitement at all. So, please convince me that she is not sad at Erwin's death. She is obviously very very affected by Erwin's death. Probably she might also be thinking that Erwin could have been the one emerging out of that titan body.

And in all these scenes, when Levi is talking, Hange did not respond, verbally or non-verbally.

The only respond she gave was after Levi gave his comforting speech to Erwin, that she said "he's dead". It is as if Hange is saying, there is no point in comforting him cos he is dead. But does Hange felt comforted by Levi's words? I dont think so.

So I do think that Hange is definitely angry at Levi and this little cold war between the 2 of them are starting to brew at the roof top here.

Plus, I also just want to mention how in-character Isyama has written both Hange and Levi. Remember how Hange used a cockroach to cover up her frustration after talking to Sannes? How she quietly sit down at the wall while thinking about her fears after taking her anger out at Nick? She hides her emotions and it is also clear that she is doing that here as she is processing her grief.

Levi, on the other hand, is so in-character with how he comforting a dying soldier: Complimenting them, affirming them and carrying on their strength and resolute on his shoulder. (I always find it weird that he complimented Erwin but now I get it. It is his way to encourage or send off the dying)

A short clip on the rooftop scene and Levi sending off his soldier in episode 9.

Levihan's Cold War [Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3.1] [Part 3.2]

[fangirlfrom-hell]

Absolution and Mercy (7x9-7x10) || Jay Halstead x Healstead Sister

*re-posting this because I'm stupid and accidentaly delated my blog 🫠

This is the plot from season 7, episodes 9 and 10 but with Jay's younger sister involved in the story.

Did I cry a bit writing this? Yes I did.

◇

Becca was usually the first one to be picked up after her afternoon classes were over, but this day she was left alone in the sidewalk. It was getting dark, she was cold and scared. At the distance she detected how a car was approaching her at full speed, but it wasn't Jay. It was Will, and she only realized that when he parked in front of her.

-"Sorry I'm so late. In my defense, Jay called me all of the sudden. I drived as fast as I could, then I got lost. Are you going to get in or what? It's freezing outside".

-"Where's Jay?" The girl asked when she was inside of the car.

-"He didn't say. He was in a hurry when he called me, he might be working in a case, something must have poped out unexpectedly. You know how it is".

-"Are you taking me home?"

-"No, I can't leave you there alone. We're going to my place. Jay will pick you up later, or I will take you back with him. He will give me a call, don't worry".

But that call never happened. During the course of the night, Will called his brother several times, but he never answered.

-"Do you think he is in danger?" Becca was starting to get worried.

-"No". Will lied. -"Maybe he's still working and he's not carrying his personal phone".

That argument didn't convince her at all.

-"It's late and you have school tomorrow, so this is what we're gonna do. Go take a shower, I'll find some clothes you can use to sleep on. I will take the sofa, so you can sleep comfy in my bed".

Not wanting to, Becca obeyed her brother. She couldn't hide her concern for Jay and Will was trying to ignore it, pretending nothing was going on. He was also quiet preoccupied but didn't want to show it. When his sister was out of the room, he gave it another try.

-"Hey, man. It's me again. Call me back as soon as you hear this...please. Bec's alright, don't worry. We're just...We want to make sure you're safe".

The sun began to set on the horizon without news of the missing Halstead brother. Will had barely slept during the night, he distributed his time between trying to reach Jay and checking on Becca, who also had a rough night. He was half asleep when a ray of light coming through the window woke him up.

-"Shit". He muttered looking at his cellphone. There were no signs of Jay.

He went to his room and found his sister sleeping under the blankets. He had to make a plan and act normal, she obviously knew something was wrong.

-"Bec". He softly moved her shoulder. -"Bec, wake up".

-"Is Jay back?" She asked half asleep.

-"No. I'm taking you home so you can get ready for school. Come on".

-"Do you think he is going to be there?"

-"We'll find out".

Will opened the door of Jay's appartment with his copy of the keys. He entered first, making sure everything was in order. Becca followed him when he gave her a sign to get in.

-"This is not good". She said. -"Where is he?"

-"I don't know. I'll pass by the 21st after I drop you off at school. Let's hope they have an answer to this mystery".

-"No. We'll pass by the 21st before you drop me off at school".

Trudy Platt was at her desk talking on the phone with the State's Attorney. She got confused when she saw both Halstead siblings entering the room, their presence wasn't a good singn, she felt it in her guts.

Sergeant Platt went up to the bullpen with Will and Becca behind her. All of the detectives were gathered there, except for Jay. The little girl looked all over the place and made a disappointed face when didn't spot her brother.

-"Hey, is Halstead on a UC run?" Trudy asked Voight.

-"Not that I know about".

-"State's Attorney is all over me. He's supposed to be in court right now. His brother and little sister are also looking for him". She pointed at them with her head.

-"He called me yesterday and asked me to take care of Becca. He was supposed to pick her up later, but never showed up. We went to his place this morning and wasn't there". Will intervened.

-"Hailey, you know anything?"

-"No, I called him a few times, but---".

-"I did too". Platt said.

-"No answer". Will concluded showing his phone. -"This is so out of character for him. He's overprotective, he would never forget about Becca like this. He didn't even called to make sure she was already with me, didn't ask if she was fine as he always does".

-"I ran the GPS on his truck...". Platt stoped and moved her eyes from Will and Becca before continuing.

-"Nothing I say will make her go downstairs". Will stated as giving her permission to keep on talking.

-"It's parked on a street in Englewood".

-"How long has it been there?"

-"All night. I ran the in-service calls to that block, there were two calls of suspicious persons at a house on that street".

Becca took a few steps to the front to reach her brother's arm.

-"Thanks, Trudy".

-"Check it out". Hank ordered to his detectives. -"We'll keep you updated". He said to Will.

-"Please find him". Becca begged the sergeant.

-"We won't stop until we find him". He reassured her with a smile and petting her head.

-"Let's move. I'll take you to school". The doctor said to his sister. -"You already missed a couple of classes".

-"Are you joking? I'm staying" She said staring directly at his eyes.

-"You'll be better at school than here or at The Med".

-"I myself will inform you when we find him, it's a promise". Trudy ended the conversation.

School was being worse than usual for Becca, she couldn't stop thinking about her brother. She was so deep in her toughts that she didn't even hear the daily mockery of her classmates. The clock was ticking slowly and her eyes began to fill with tears.

-"I'm here to take Becca Halstead". The school's principal interrupted the class. -"Take your backpack, sweetie. They're here to pick you up".

The tone on the woman's voice reminded her of that time Burgess and Roman took her to the bullpen because Jay was being threatened. She took her stuff and walked throught the hallway to find Trudy Platt at the office.

-"Here she is, Sergeant. You can take her now".

-"I promised you that I would inform you as soon as they found it. The team just found him".

-"Is he-".

-"I don't know anything else". Platt interrupted. -"I just know he was found". She lied, she wasn't the indicated to talk with her about his condition. -"Come on, I'll take you to The Med. Will is waiting there".

The Med was full of cops and detectives as usually happened when one of their own was wounded. For Will it was surreal that this time the victim was his brother, he still couldn't assimilate the fact. His mind was all disturbed constantly changing from the doctor to the brother role and viceversa. Apart from Jay's state of health, what worried him the most was Becca. Despite having notified a lot of bad news during his career, he had no clue how to discuss the situation with his little sister. He didn't want to, but he didn't want anyone else to be the one telling her the news. He was also uncommonly scared to enter the waiting room where the policemen were waiting for updates.

Hailey Upton was sitting leaning over with her elbows on her knees, the fear was evident on her face. Looking at her teary eyes it was obvios how much she had been crying. It wasn't strange at all, she and Halstead had been partners for a couple of years now and their relationship had grown to a good friendship, a very good friendship. Detective Rojas sat next to her and extended her a coffee, leaning a hand on her back as a reassuring gesture.

Kevin and Adam were also there, both standing up, for anxiety did not allow them to stay still. The rest of the place was packed with uniformed. Hank Voight was on his feet, concern was evident through his eyes. A lot of officers and commanders approached him offering their support.

With a heavy sigh and holding back a lot of emotions, Will encouraged himself to go inside with them. Everybody stood up at his presence. Detective Upton quickly positioned herself in front of him, followed by the rest of the team.

-"Hey, Everybody". Somehow he was managing to stay as the doctor, not the brother. -"I just talked to Dr. Marcel, he said the bullet grazed an artery. They are still trying to repair it".

-"Will?" Hank Voight intervened. -"Is he gonna be ok?"

-"He's lost a lot of blood". Words stuck in his throat and dried stoped talking. Ruzek gave him a pat on the shoulder to show emotional support, there wasn't relly anything else to do.

-"Will..." Maggie interrupted from the outside of the waiting room. Everyone turned their attention to the charge nurse and there was no need for her to explain anything. Becca was right behind her, her big hazel eyes wide open looking at all of the cops and some other familiar faces, trying to comprehend what was going on.

-"Oh, Bec...". Will approached to her sweating cold, with his heart raced in fear.

-"Wh--What's going on?" She asked, not being able to take her eyes off the cops. -"Sergeant Platt told me they found Jay, but nothing else. What happened?". Her voice was charged with despair.

The detectives' eyes were all on Becca, wide open as if waiting for a reaction from the girl.

-"Yeah. Ok. Hmm--there's no easy way to say this". His voice was very low and raspy. -"Jay was kidnapped, but his team found him and...".

-"Where is he? Can I see him?" The little girl interrupted calmly.

-"Jay was shot, Becca. He's going into surgery right now". As a doctor, he knew there wasn't other way of saying it.

-"Oh". The girl said as if it was a casual situation. -"But, I mean...he's going to be fine, right?".

-"He's...lost a lot o blood".

-"But it's Jay". Becca interrupted with a smiled, more as a symtom of a nervour breakdown, eyes starting to get teary. Maybe she didn't realize it, but she was avoiding the rest of the information. -"He has been shot before, he's like indestructible".

At that moment, Becca sensed how Maggie held her shoulders, and the weight of the world fell on the little girl. The atmosphere felt the same as when Jay told her that their mother had died, as same as when Will explained to her that they would have to disconnect their father. All of those memories and feelings were taking control over her, but this time Jay wasn't there to help her go through them.

-"Bec..."

-"No..."

-"Becca, he was shot in the chest, no bulletproof vest. He has lost a lot of blood...".

-"Will--". Maggie tried to stop the doctor.

-"Shut up!"

-"...but he's in surgery right now with Dr. Marcel, one of the very best in Chicago and he's..."

-"Just stop!". Becca cried.

-"Dr. Halstead!" Maggie insisted worried for how Becca was taking the news. There has to be another way of notifyig.

-"...doing his best to save our brother's life. He is in the best hands". He tried to hold her, but she refused him.

-"Is he goig to die?" Becca asked in a very low voice and bursted into an uncontrollable crying.

Will held his sister as tight as he could, so tight she was barely breathing under his arms. He tried to keep his composure, but broke down when he heard his little sister crying loud. He kissed her head, there was nothing to say, nothing to do, just be there for each other.

The intelligence team witnessed the scene and was moved by it, but most of all it made their anger grow even more. Tears rolled down Hailey's cheeks, Adam just stared at the floor with his arms crossed. Hank Voight patted Becca on the back as he passed through te sibblings to run into Burgess, who had just arrived.

-"I got an update on Angela Nelson".

-"Okay".

-"Doctors removed the bullet. She's gonna be fine".

-"Where is she?" And with that only question, they both left the place in a hurry.

With all of the movement that was generated, Will separated from Becca and took her by the shoulders: -"Come on, let's sit". They walked embraced, everyone moving to let them pass. She knew all of the detectives who were present, each one of them tried to make her feel their suport: Atwater squeezed her shoulder, Vanessa gave her a warm smile, Adam gave her a hug and Hailey sat right next to her holding her hand.

Not wanting to leave the hospital, Intelligence detectives had to withdraw due to a case assigned by Superintendent Crawford, something Hank couldn't avoid. Detective Upton was the only one that refused to leave, and no one contradicted her.

A couple of hours passed, but it felt like an eternity for Becca. There were still no news about Jay and that made her agony grow.

-"Why is it taking so long?" She was walking from one side to another, anxiety starting to increase.

-"These procedures are very delicate, they take a lot of time. You know what? You should go home". Will suggest. -"I don't think it is a good idea for you to stay here so much time. I'll find someone who can take you. You need rest, to change clothes, you haven't even eat anything".

-"I'm not going anywhere, Will". Becca answered with a stern tone that reminded of Jay's way of talking in distress. They were so alike.

-"Dr. Halstead". Maggie interrupted. -"I'm so sorry, you are requiered in the ER".

Will stared at his little sister, not knowing what to do, he would never leave her by herself in a normal day, much less under the circumstances they were going through.

-"Come on. I can't leave you here alone. Take your backpack, you can stay in the Doctor's room or in a dormitory while I find someone who can take you...".

-"I am not going anywhere, Will". Becca repeated her own words, this time with a little bit of anger.

-"Bec, I get it, I totally do. You want to stay here for Jay, but we will be updated in the ER, I just can't leave you here alone".

-"Alone? This must be the safest place in the hospital right now". She said pointing to all of the cops around.

-"I am not going anywhere". Upton interrupted before Will could continue. -"I can take care of her".

-"Hailey, you don't have to, you are already going through a lot right now and you are on duty, so...".

-"Nobody will move me from here, Will. It's ok, for real".

-"Is that all right for you?". Will looked at Becca and noticed the tiredness and sadness in her eyes as she nodded. -"Ok, all right. Just promise me that you'll eat something, kiddo". He approached to his little sister and kissed her forehead before parting.

-"Not really hungry, but I'll try".

-"Please do it for me. I'll be back as soon as I can".

His heart dropped when he walked out of the room, she also felt a little bit helpless, alone. It was true that she knew Hailey since a few years ago, she liked her and trusted her, but she wasn't her family and that's what she needed at the moment.

-"What if I bring you a hamburger from the cafeteria?" Maggie smiled to Becca. -"Don't you dare to say 'no' to me. I know it's your favorite, I'll be right back".

Becca took a deep breath and sighed, her leg was shaking a lot even standing up. Despair and anxiety were taking over her small body, she felt the urge to hit something or somebody. Her mind started going around, she couldn't live without Jay, what would she do without her big brother? She was nothing without him. A lot of memories came to her mind, good ones and bad ones. Suddenly she was crying without even noticing it.

-"Hey!" Hailey called her from her seat and forced a smile for the girl. -"Wanna join me here?".

Becca sat next to her brother's partner, not really knowing what to do or what to say. She tried to hold her tears, but failed, so she wiped them away as soon as they got out of her eyes. Hailey placed a hand in Becca's shaking leg.

-"You don't need to do that. You can cry in front of me, I won't judge you. I mean, look at me". They both smiled. -"Here, hold my hand, squeeze it. Breath with me, it will help you ease your toughts: 4 in, hold 7 and 8 out".

-"Thank you". The little Halstead sister said when she was more calmed.

-"I know you and Jay are very close. He's so private, but he still talks a lot about you with me".

-"He does?".

-"Yes. When we started working together, before knowing he had a sister, I always tought he was talking about his daughter".

-"Imagine that". Becca made a disgust gesture and laughed a bit. -"I know you two are very fond too. He never talks about work with me, but you wouldn't be here if you didn't care for him". She didn't feel like revealing right there that Jay had talked about her before.

-"He is a good partner, it's hard to find one". The girl stared at her for a few seconds, then they stayed in silence for a couple of minutes, staring at the floor. Becca was a sensible girl, she understood there was more behind Detective Upton words and suddenly Hailey felt like family.

-"I'm really scared". She confessed while unconsciously hugging Hailey's arm.

-"Me too". The detective held her tight. -"But your brother, he is a tough guy, he's strong of mind and body. And he loves you so much, he won't stop fighting to overcome this and come back to you. I can assure you that".

A very special connection was formed between Hailey and Becca in that exact moment. In Hailey's arms, Becca found the peace she needed to rest, and fell asleep while she stroked her ginger tousled hair. Inside her chest, Hailey was feeling the urgent need to protect the little girl, as if she was her own sister. She never let her go while they waited together, if anything, she held her tighter as time passed by.

Rojas found them like that when she went back to the hospital to check on Hailey.

-"Hey". Vanessa announced her presence.

-"Hey". Upton answered back in a low voice, trying to hug her roomate, but couldn't really move with Becca asleep in her shoulder.

-"I got you some gyro from Greek Islands, I tought you might be hungry".

-"That's really sweet of you. Thanks". She took the back with her unoccupied hand.

-"And I got you some clean clothes from the appartment".

-"Thank you". She genuinely smiled.

-"Have we heard anything about Jay?" She sat down next to her friend.

-"No". Upton sadly answered, unconsciously checking on Becca, who was now half awake. -"He's gonna freak out when he wakes up, the man hates needles. I can't figure him out, he's the first one through the door, a war vet. And he'd rather take a bullet than get the flu shot".

Becca, who was now listening everything, internally laughed at that last comment. That was a good description of his brother.

-"Hailey, I know how hard this must be for you".

-"It's always hard when something like this happens".

-"It's hard because you love him". Vanessa Rojas said simply.

Becca's heart began to beat a little bit faster, this time for a good feeling instead of anxiety. Of course she was in love with her brother, everything made sense now. And she knew Jay had feelings for her too. Maybe that was why she felt so secure by her side.

-"Of course I love him. He's my partner". Hailey answered to finish the conversation.

Both detectives phones started to buzz and Becca took advantage of that to pretend that she had just woken up.

-"Ruzek got a lead on the home invasion". Rojas looked at her phone.

-"Yeah. Um, I'm gonna stay". Hailey said looking at Becca, who looked devastated even after having rested a bit.

-"Is everything all right?" The younger Halstead asked when Rojas left. Hailey nodded her head, not being able to controll her sobbing. The last conversation had moved a lot inside of her and was now a mixure of feelings.

Another hour passed by and Becca couldn't take it anymore.

-"Where's Will? He was supposed to be back soon and also keep us updated.

-"He was here a few times, but you were deep asleep. He didn't want to bother you. He had no news, though".

-"I heard my favorite Halstead didn't want to leave her brother's side". A familiar voice called, it was Trudy Platt. She approached with a bag in her hands. -"So I thought it would help to bring you some clothes, hunny. I mean, CPD sweaters and pants might not be the best, but they should be more confortable than that uniform you've been wearing all day. These are the smallest I found, I'm positive they'll fit you".

When Becca came back from the restroom, all changed and carrying the other clothes, she found Hailey and Platt standing up in front of Will. Fear ran through her entire body once more, not knowing what to expect, since the three of them looked very serius. It was Hailey who spotted the little girl petrified in terror at the entrance of the room.

-"Bec". Will called her. -"He's all right. Jay is going to be fine".

-"Are you sure?" She dropped her clothes and started to cry happy tears.

-"It will take time for him to recover and I can assure you he will be a pain in the ass, but he's going to be all right".

Becca laughed and jumped into her brother's arms, who lifted her up a bit in the air. Upton and Platt presenced the scene with teary eyes of relief and a smile from ear to ear.

-"Can I see him?"

-"He's still asleep, but of course. You can wait by his side until he wakes up. Come on, I'll take you there. My shift will end in a couple of hours and then I'll fully be with you two".

-"Oh, but wait!" She turned to Hailey, before following her brother. -"You should come with us. Will, she can come with us, right?".

-"I don't think is a good idea. I'll wait in here until he wakes up, don't worry". She rushed to say before letting Will answer.

-"No. I really think you should come". Once more, there was that tone so similar to Jay comming from Becca.

-"There's no problem, Hailey. If you want to, you can come". The doctor confirmed.

When Jay woke up, Hailey was out changing her clothes. Becca was the first person he spotted when he opened his eyes.

-"Hey". He managed to say and raised his unharmed arm trying to reach his little sister, taking her elbow. -"Why are you crying?" She took his hand and squeezed it as tight as she could.

-"Because I'm happy you're alive, dummy". Jay smiled when he heard her voice.

Both siblings had a lot of things to say, but they didn't need words to express their feelings. They stared at each others eyes and it was enough to understand what they were going through.

-"I know". Jay said feeling how emotional Becca was. -"Come here". He opened his arm within his posibilities and with a lot of caution she laid down her head to hug him back. -"I'm sorry. I'm so, so, sorry". He kept repeating in a raspy voice.

They stayed like that for a while. Jay couldn't stop thinking about his actions and what would had happened to Becca if he had died. She was the only thing on his toughts when he received the shot. Becca relaxed when she heard her brother's heartbeat, it was the definitive evidence she needed to make sure he was really alive.

-"How are you feling?"

-"Like I was asleep for a year".

-"You needed a little rest".

-"Sorry to interrupt". Detective Upton came into the scene, embarrased to be the reason they had to separate. -"I didn't noticed you were already awake".

-"Don't worry. You are just in time". Becca smiled.

-"Hailey?" Jay started and she walked to the other side of the bed.

-"You know I hate hospitals".

-"Oh, you are just fine already, aren't you?". Becca rolled her teary eyes, but the comment made Hailey laughed a bit.

-"I do".

-"You gotta get me out of here".

-"It's not optional, no".

Hank Voight entered almost immediately and stood next to his detectives.

-"Becca, happy to see your eyes lighting again". He greeted her first with a head nodd, then talked to Jay: -"How's the shoulder?"

-"It feels like I'll be flying a little crooked for a while.

-"I went and talked to Will and he said no structural damage, so you got lucky".

-"I guess you could call it that".

There was something going around Jay's mind, but he couldn't ask with the presence of his little sister. He didn't want her to leave, but he had to ask Voight, and there wasn't going to be another chance.

-"Uh, Bec--why don't you go and..."

-"I guess I'll go find Will, yes". Becca said feeling the tension.

-"How's Angela doing?" He finally asked when they were alone.

-"She's under arrest".

From outside the room, Becca saw Hailey and Voight going out having a brief conversation, they looked concerned. When they split up, the Sergeant walked into another room and Upton rushed out of the hospital.

-"Is your shift already over?" Becca asked Will when he passed by, not even noticing her.

-"Half an hour and I'm done". He said looking at his clock. -"Look at you, all smiley again".

-"Jay woke up. They are running some tests right now. He's going to loose it if there are needles involved".

-"He just received a shot and I do believe he would still be afraid of a needle". The siblings laughed.

The three Halsteads stayed together as much as they could, but it was getting late and they were tired. Becca's eyes started to close due to mental exhaustation, she had cried all day and her mind was pushed to the limit. Now that everything was calmed coudn't avoid to fall asleep although the chair she was sitting in was the most unconfortable.

-"I think it's time to go". Will said. -"She stayed by your side all day, didn't want to move for a second. She was really, really worry".

-"Maybe I wasn't the indicated to be in charge of her". Jay sighed and spat what he had in his mind. -"Maybe we should have let aun Clair take her".

-"And just let her go to New York far away from us? Like, never see her again? What are you talking about, Jay? Where is this comming from, anyway?"

-"It's not the first time I've put her in a situation like this".

-"Stop thinking about it. It's the sedatives, you are all sensible and tired and need more rest. We are good, Jay. There is no one with whom she is better than with you, not even me".

A few days passed before Jay was discharged. Becca noticed how a lot of people visited him more than once: Kim, Adam, Kevin, Vanessa, Hank, Trudy and a bunch of other cops she didn't recognize. Her brother was a beloved soul and the love he received was extended towards her. She stayed inside of the room with all of the visits, except with Hailey. She always found an excuse to go out of the room when Detective Upton arrived.

-"All right. Finally, time to go home". Will said carrying a bag. -"Got you clean clothes and other stuff you may need".

-"Thank you".

-"Are you sure you don't need a hand?" Dr. Halstead asked before going out.

-"I'm good. I'll be using only one hand for a couple of days, so I might get used to it from now on".

-"I'll be around if you change your mind. Bec, let's go. Give the man some space".

Becca already knew all of the hospital, specially the ER, so she was left alone on the hallway while Will went back to work. She went to the vending machine to get something to eat while waiting for Jay. She got a juice for herself and was about to take a bag of gummies for her brother when a voice interrupted her.

-"Isn't a little bit early for candies?" It was Dr. Charles.

-"Oh, no. These are for my brother. He is about to be discharged, I tought about getting him his favorites".

-"That's a nice gesture and I'm happy to hear he's going out.

These past days were very hectic, weren't they?".

-"You bet".

Becca started walking slowly back to Jay's room, the psychiatrist by her side.

-"Dr. Charles?"

-"Yes, tell me".

-"Did Will send you to spy on me?"

-"What makes you think that?"

-"I know you've been following me around the hospital for the last couple of days. If I go to the restroom, you are there. If I go to the cafeteria, you are there. Whenever I'm alone, you are there...and now we're here". Becca smiled.

-"Oh. It wasn't my intention to make you feel harassed. Your brother Will wants to make sure you are fine, that's all".

-"No, it's ok. I think I understand".

-"Good. Well, now that we're here, would you mind if I ask you how are you doing? Your mind and body were under a lot of stress for a long period of time".

-"I'm fine. I mean, Jay is alive, that's all that matters".

-"Hm. You are right. Anyway, I'll be around if you feel the need to talk. Even when you go back home, you know I will be here".

-"Thanks, Dr. Charles".

That last conversation was strange for the little girl, why would she need to talk to Dr. Charles? Jay was alive, everything was fine. She couldn't stop going around it in her mind, she tought about telling Jay about it, but when she was close to his room she detected someone else inside, it was Hailey. Becca stood watching from afar how the detective was helping her brother to put on his sweater, that made her smile. She didn't know what they were talking about, but from her place it seemed they were very close from each other. Becca turned and walked away to give them some space.

Thanks for reading. If you liked it, it would help my soul if you give it a like, comment or share. 😌♡

[tmasc-confessions]

Im Transmasc And Also Agender And Asexual And Aromantic (We Like To Call Ourselves AAA Batteries Haha).

As You Can Guess Since Gender And Sexuality Can Be So Intertwined Its Intertwined For Me Also.

I Don't Know If I Want Any Bottom Surgery, Frankly It Scares Me (Medical Reasons, Not Transphobic Rhetoric Spread About Surgery Reasons).

Everyone Assumes Stuff Because They Don't Personally Get It/Experience It.

If I Do Persue Bottom Surgery It'd Be For Nullification Or Phalloplasty. Tried To Find Other Conversations Talking About This, Went On An Aseuxality Forum.

Forum Post, A Year Old, Multiple Insulting Comments. Why Are People So Rude? So Assumptious? We're In The 21st Century For Fucks Sake Please Why Is There So Much Unnecessary Hatred Still (/Rhetorical. I Sadly Know Why).

-----------------------------

First Person, "Im A Cis Asexual Woman But I Dont Think That Has To Do With Asexuality, Just Agender"

No Shit It Has To Do With Agender But Its Also Related To Being Asexual. You Even State Yourself Youre Cis, So Maybe Youre Gender Identity + Sexuality Experience Is Different? How Many Times Does It Need To Be Said That Asexuality Is A Spectrum. Different People Have Different Experiences. An Asexual Trans Person Can Go On The Asexuality Forum To Find Other Trans Asexuals. If Youre A Cis Alloromantic Asexual Woman Maybe Youre Feelings About Your Bottom Area Is Different Than An Aromantic Asexual Agender Persons Feelings With Their Bottom Area, Did You Ever Think About That? Hm? Maybe That Post Was For Asexuals Who Also Felt That Way, Not For Asexuals Who Didnt.

From A Different Account, "Maybe You Should Go To A Psychiatrist? Sounds Like That Self Mutilation Mental Illness"

The Forums Thread Topic/Title Was Asking If Any Other Asexuals Have Experienced/Want To Get The Surgery. Thats It. This One Is Harder Emotionally For Me To Get Through Because Its A Rehash Of Classic Transphobia While Also Being So Unempathically Dismissive While At Least The Other Comment Can Be Excused By Ignorance, This One Feels Malicious. It Makes Me Want To Cry.

---------------------------

I Like Being AAA, I Want To Love Myself. I Cant Change How I Am Naturally. I Want To Live Peacefully. I Want To Live Without Constantly Being Reminded Theres People Out There Who Want Me Dead For Existing As What? Myself? What Am I Doing Wrong? What Did I Do? Oh No The Tranny Faggot Doesn't Want To Be Bothered Or Belittled Or Dismissed Or Bullied, What A Crime.

This Is Why Certain Intersectionality Identities Form Their Own More Niche Groups To Talk, Because Even The More Wider Groups That Should Be Safe, Aren't. Like That One Comic Image You Had Recently On This Blog.

This World Wasnt Made To Be Welcoming To Me. I Want It To Be Though.

Thank You TMascConfessions Blogger For Having This Space, I Really Do Appreciate It. I Hope Your Day Is Treating You Well.

-🥔

.

[deesseshesca]

Dang I like your aesthetic but you’re readings never resonate with me

First thing first ... thank you so much for the question. I hope you my answer resonate with you.

PART-1

I had to sit down and ask my spirit guides before I ask about you... what the heck is up with me ? You don't understand how grateful I am with your simple yet effective review. Another prove that sometime ''a wish come truth'' is not always something that feels good. Since I am who I am I crave genuine and you handed it to me. You don't understand how fixated on whether or not my reading resonate. I am not the type to care for number but you need to start some where. Than multiple well resected tarot reader on my timeline applaud my work. I knew I was not a scammer and y'all can sense that 2. Yet the people don't seem to love my blog (still the number (notes)). Change aesthetic and strategy it goes up. Somewhere I had to become more familiar with my own aesthetic and I actually had to learn how Tumblr works. I've spend over 5 years on this app yet a bitch did not even know how a like work. That's when I saw consistent growth (follower). Yet... no real review ... like what the fuck do y'all actually think of this blog. I ask but there's only so much I can force out of y'all.

Let me tell you why you guys may not resonate

I had a little meeting with my spirit guides ... if I don't sugarcoat for you ... I don't sugar coated for me.

Q1: Since is a PAC on a broad platform it will make sense that I just did not connect with their energy ?

Yes.

Q2: Maybe I did connect but never post it ? (I have so many PAC that I don't post... My spirit warn me that this shit is going to bite me back in the ass)

Yes.

Q3: I hate basic question, therefore I only welcome a certain collective which makes me loose connection with the rest of energy ?

Yes.

Q4: Since my description are extremely precise, some people may give up before even getting into the reading ?

Yes but Girl we been told you that would since the beginning.

Ok but than y'all send specific elements ... am I suppose to ignore it ?

Babygirl don't play dumb ... when you want to max out an audience you have to be broad.

But y'all know I prefer to be right than being loved.

There's she go again being stubborn where is not even needed.

Q5: If I follow my marketing degree and stop being stubborn will people resonate ?

YES!

Q6: Is the problem my tone of writing ?

Yes.

Q7: Should I fix it ?

Yes.

Q8: What does my audience want ?

They want a safe place in which they can come and grap some good advice. Don't get them wrong they love the detail, they are very intrigue by you. While reading you they realize you have a big lore yet nothing is coming out or you give off the vibe of a with in a forest (Yak... you know I hate camping-Girl is not about you !). You give the vibe of a big siter that been there done that, yet they have actually no real idea what u been through but they trust your advice. They love your advice is practical and empathic.

Q9 : If they love me so much ... why are we not as close as other community ?

YOUR NAGGNG PROBLEM. Every time they open a PAC, they have to get ready to be roast at 4 times, be call out of their name all the damm time and being drag through the woods like a useless doll. Sometime all that nagging ain't worth the good advice. Instead of acting like the cool cousin or anty. You out here nagging like a big sister that is never please. (First ... ouch I am a real life big sister that nag but I do it because I don't want them to fall for life illusion. I want them to be better and do better). Shesca that always been your problem (nah I don't feel like we are only talking about tarot no more ...) your need to protect often destroy. Because the same vulnerable soul that are coming for answer deserve also love, comfort and grace and not just protection. Some of them already know they mess up ... they don't need a ransom bitch on the internet to remind them. They want comfort. You need to learn how to love and protect.

CONCLUSION : (Hum.. I feel like a kid that just got yell at in the middle of the super market) This is definitely more than just tarot. WTF... not your message being life changing. Ok my Chérie D'amour, I commit to be more gentle and loving and just know that whatever I've done did not come from an evil place (just wanted to be a wake up call not a slap across the face) but because I actually am rooting for each one of y'all. Not me give lame ass apology like an abusive parent (wait... I knew this shit was more than fucking tarot). Let me prove it to y'all. Give me a second chance babe ... I will do better. Starting with you.

PART-2

Here is my apology (because when u wrote that, I know you were not waiting on some long ass sorry post and also because I am extremely grateful for your comments. You saved 3 hours of aesthetic changing because I though my blog was not cute enough and that's why people did not interact with me. Just found out I am just a scary bitch. Sorry y'all...)

What's your current energy ? (Only song for you love life came through)

You crave love. I am not even talking relationship wise ... I am more getting family wise. You come a rather abundant family. Never had a issue worry about basic needs and you probably did private school, honors program, trip once a year, your parent probably brought you you first car and there is not a single thing your dad ain't going to buy for you. Yet ... you hate the environment you been brough up in. They always arguing all the time. You hate loud noise. You are sometime force to chime in but all you are screaming about is wanting love. I'm hearing : Mom - You really had to take his side ? You: Mom ... really ... all I want is for it to stop. Y'all dread the holiday because is the same family dinner that always end up in a mess. Y'all love your family so much. You just wish they love you enough to love each other. The advice coming through is to let go. Even when they try to bring you in runaway or repeated over and over again that you don't want to take side or you can't take side. I'm going to be honest they argue so much that is not even about a specific issue is because everyone is so focus on their own pain.

Future energy

Everything is going to get better. There is so much love in y'all family. Y'all just need to learn to stop fighting each other but more the issue. When you are going to refocus your mind on the issue and not each other mistake and pain y'all will literally enter 10 pentacles phase. Which is the card for ultimate pro-active family bound that last generation. Side note maybe y'all have some ancestral karmic tie related to family that need t be heal. You are ask to keep a distance with pettiness and stay full of love.

What's current energy with your love life ?

You are mad that someday did not pick you. You are not giving me pick me vibe but I am getting you are a 10 across the board (that you is ... babe your body is tea, skin is clear, you have a job and go to school ... mamacita has motion) yet not only did they not choose you. They humiliate you.

Song : More than I should - Kehlani ft Jessie Reyez

Future energy love life

Somebody new is walking in your life in the next 2 weeks. Babe you are going to be on heat for that person. Don't worry because they will show they want you. Is not lust but is not love. Both of you are feeling the same thing but you are not going to be honest with your feeling. Preferring hiding behind games. The way they desire for you body, you touch is like a storm of passionate emotion where no matter what they do they are falling for you. Every time you text them, send a selfie, a voice note, touch them, look at them ... just exist they are fighting to sweep you off your feet and run away. They are always going to be with that one close friend. The reason you won't allow your self to fall for it is they have different background and look from you. I am getting a preppy, old money, sober Sally vibe from you. Meaning you may have grow up in a religious family in which a lot of expectation is sitting on your shoulder and who you are going to marry is definitely one of them. Maybe they come from a more open minded family. They may have tattoo, more darker aesthetic and don't have the social etiquette your parent put in you. You don't think less of them you just know that your family is not going to accept it. That's it. Usually I shuffle for more but spirit kept stopping me. You have to choose. You have to decide were do you want this to go. All I know is that they are always going to choose you. They are actually going to be the one waiting from an answer from you.

Song : Your stuck - Odeal ft Summer walker

On that note good night Chérie d'Amour and thank you for your bless message.