#also need to figure out a tag for this particular fandom since i have been reblogging so many lawlight posts

[totheidiot]

"i am gay" "i am straight" okay??? i'll bring the rain??? i'll bring the wind??? i'm the mighty hurricane???

[notherpuppet]

Is there any particular reason you use ship names with qpr relationships? (Like using a / or radioapple for examples) It makes it a little hard to tell what's meant to be romantic and platonic in fandoms sometimes, no shame for using them obvi and not pushing you to change your tagging or anything. Just wondering

Well the QPR I'm depicting is pretty affectionate (I mean mostly just xo's, not xxx hahaha) so even if it's NOT romantic, it probably may still be perceived as a ship between characters. I'm purposefully displaying a bond that is affectionate and loving, albeit platonic. So I still consider it a ship and that's why I tag it as such.

So with QPRs like radioapple, radiorose, almimzy, radiostatic, etc. etc. (alastor ships pretty much lol) I just figure that if people don't like to see characters in this ship, they're able to just block the tag. There are ships that I don't particularly like, but I just scroll away. It doesn't really bother me, but yknow; we get to cater a lot of our own social media experiences. There's the block and mute options for a reason.

As for ascertaining whether a ship art is QPR or not, I think someone can inquire or just do a little more legwork to figure that out themselves tbh. Some things may not have been written to be QPR, but may fit inside that idea for someone engaging in the artwork/fanfic. Some things may be intentionally written to be QPR and not coincide with a fan's taste or personal ideas. For example, someone may depict a QPR that includes sex. These are valid QPR experiences. On the flip side, someone may not be depicting a QPR and they include nothing explicit or affectionate, but it still fits into someone else's idea of what a QPR can look like. It's not black and white. There is nuance.

We should individually do the work of assessing if a fanart is something that we appreciate or not. AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL AN ARTIST IF YOU DON'T LIKE HOW THEY DO SOMETHING BTW. Just saying. Pretty RUDE ACTUALLY so yknow I would advocate for NOT doing that. I also don't think we need to put it on the artists to define exactly what they're depicting, since it can be a pretty difficult relationship to pin down. Affection and friendship can look very different for lots of people. And I don't think it's necessary for an artist or writer to spell out their intentions for us. Art is a means to express oneself and to have fun. If we choose to engage in an artwork, then we can also interpret it and come to conclusions of our own.

TLDR; I'm gonna go ahead and tag QPRs as their fandom ship names and I think it's up to us as users to cater social media to our tastes individually.

[ilikekidsshows]

hey I figure that you’re probably tired of talking about the Sentimonster nonsense but I genuinely still can’t stand that it’s an actual thing. The wildest thing about it is that I JOINED the fandom because of the Sentimonster theory, actually got excited for it and looked forward to hints, not believing the skeptics or the salters bc it didn’t seem like such a big deal—that is until I saw with my own eyes how SO MANY FANS said with their whole chest that, in “Ephemeral” Adrien HAD to be a Sentimonster or there was no other “sympathetic explanation” for why he didn’t de-akumatize himself or fight off Gabriel.

Seeing the victim blaming in real time was such a punch in the gut—and then they just kept on coming!! It finally hit me how damaging the entire thing because for the show as a whole. If even regular fans that weren’t even known for salting could so willingly disregard and ignore genuine abuse coping mechanisms in favor of magical BS… it was such a dark time. Abuse Apologism and victim blaming in a whole package

Sometimes, when I write about Miraculous, I pretend I'm writing about a show that only had three seasons. That's what the "zagulous fandom" tag is for; it's for posts that are about the parts of Miraculous that had Zag's executive control keeping Astruc in check. I also kinda accepted long ago that my blog's kind of a support blog for people who are against the Sentihuman concept.

When I first heard of the expanded Sentimonster theory, the one that went "all the rich kids are Sentimonsters", I instantly went: "You do realize how making victims of child abuse nonhumans with questionable rights minimizes their victimhood and excuses their abusers, right?" people told me I was making stuff up and whoopsie doo, the writers did exactly that.

Neither Gabriel nor Tomoe faced any consequences for abusing Adrien and Kagami because, after all, since they're Sentimonsters, the real abuse was that they didn't have their Amoks so giving them their Amoks resolves all their problems. The only abusive parent who gets acknowledged as such is Félix's dad, who is dead by the time we hear about any of this, because we can't have abusive parents face consequences for their actions because that might upset people or whatever excuses Astruc's giving for Gabriel's vindication now.

This also minimises all the affects of the abuse on the kids, since they can be handwaved away with: "They were just programmed that way." Kagami's bad social skills aren't because her mother isolated her, it's because she forgot to program Kagami with those skills. Félix's villainous behavior isn't because his mother is overly permissive with him, he was just programmed that way (by the eeeeevil Colt). Adrien isn't a people pleaser because he's repeating his abuse coping mechanisms with his overly controlling girlfriend to keep her happy the same way he did to his overly controlling father, he was just programmed to be the perfect doting son and boyfriend.

You'll notice how neatly this ties into the crew denying that Chloé was abused in any way ever by her clearly abusive mother. Chloé wasn't made into a Sentimonster, so we can't have her bad coping with her abuse be excused by "Sentimonster programming", so now the writers are just gaslighting the audience and saying: "Chloé wasn't mistreated by her parents which caused her to act to out to get attention (which she literally stated to be her motive in season 3), in fact, she's the one who's been terrorizing her poor, innocent father and he needs to be protected from this naturally occuring evil hellspawn."

All child abuse in this show gets excused.

Of course, now the writers have an added reason to make sure Adrien's abuse gets excused in particular: because they made Marinette benefit from it. As I said, Adrien is repeating abuse coping mechanisms learned from dealing with his father to keep Marinette happy. He's always prioritizing her feelings and never brings up his own problems, and this is good for Marinette, because she can just enjoy having a perfect boyfriend who caters to her every need and doesn't have problems of his own or with the ways she treats him (for all she knows). She's even maintaining this status quo by lying about Gabriel to Adrien, so Adrien won't get upset (and have emotional needs that she would need to help him with). Either we have to excuse Adrien's abuse, or we have to admit Marinette is benefitting from the fact that Adrien was abused, and even taking advantage with the way she makes no effort to improve their communication on her end, preferring to spy on Adrien and lie to him instead of just talking to him like an equal.

The show writers are also allergic to following through on their creative decisions, is what I think. They put all these different victims of child abuse and neglect in the show, and then dehumanized these children in different ways so that they wouldn't actually need to say anything about that abuse they wrote in and they can instead pretend it was never there. This is why I also think that, no matter how much the show's defenders insist the story isn't over yet, we will never be getting a proper resolution to the Sentinonsense.

[lover-of-mine]

I have realized what is making my head explode when a BT post accidentally goes through my tags!!!! They are completely ignoring Buck is bi. They are acting like my aunt in the early 2000s. I may not have been fond of all the LUs but they were valid relationships. If Taylor had not fucked up who knows where that relationship would have gone. I mean clearly nowhere once Eddie was out because once Eddie broke up with him he spiraled and kissed Lucy. But they are still valid relationships and at this point in time I don't see how Tommy is better than any of them. To be honest he has the worst traits of Abby and Taylor but the screen time of Ally. So frustrating.

Well, when have people ever been normal about bisexuality? But here's the thing, every relationship Buck had so far had his own set of issues that somehow have been reduced to the way he was dating women, which is fucked in so many ways and the amount of times I have to stop myself from picking a fight because of bucktaylor it's actually hysterical to me because we're seriously at a point where I need to defend the validity of Taylor's place in Buck's life. Like, how did we get here? Because here's the thing, do I think Buck and Taylor were meant to be? No. Do I think Buck would've clung to her until he literally couldn't anymore if her actions hadn't hurt his family? Absolutely. I see Buck going as far as panic proposing to her if that particular situation hadn't happened, just to have someone. Because they had chemistry and Buck kept trying to force that to become love. Taylor was wrong for Buck for a multitude of reasons, but none of those reasons were because she's a woman and Buck is gay. And the relationship with Tommy is not gonna magically last forever just because Tommy is a man. Tommy is this weird amalgamation of all of Buck's love interests with Ali/Ana levels of screentime and he doesn't magically have a fighting chance just because he has a dick and people can't seem to see this. And I think that's crazy. Because Tommy was given to us in an episode that had the theme of not recognizing people, while actively making us think it was about someone else and then they did the Kim storyline and I want to scream because people can't see the parallels. And the more I look at it the more insane I get because he's all of Buck's love interests smashed into someone who's Eddie two steps to the left with none of the things we love about him. But somehow he's perfect because he's not a woman. The only thing Tommy has going for him is not being a woman. You turn him into one and none of the things he did would fly. Letting Buck get away with physically hurting Eddie? Leaving him in the curb? Not dressing up? Making a kink joke after someone Buck loves almost died? Picture those scenes with Lucy and tell me anyone in the fandom would be shipping them. Let alone fighting for them the way people are right now. But he's a man so he gets a pass and that's so fucking weird. Evan Buckley is bisexual but getting dicked down isn't going to magically make everything perfect. Jesus.

Also, since you mentioned Eddie coming out, something that I've been thinking about since we found out it was supposed to be Eddie, a Buck who thinks he's straight finding out Eddie has a boyfriend would shortcircuit. I legit think they could not find a way to write Buck's reaction to Eddie being queer that didn't end with him figuring his feelings out so they switched things up, so Buck would for sure would've gotten there once Eddie got there because he would've had big feelings about it and Buck is not the repressed one.

[italianpersonwithashippersheart]

GMMTV QL PLAN

Given the recent string of BLs that have dissapointed me narratively (missing or rushed character arcs, set ups for things that go nowhere, stringing plots along even past the point they were needed, incomplete or dropped or rushed story arcs etc...) I have decided to change to try and figure out in advance which shows I will watch and how (both in attitude and if I watch live).

---

Peaceful Property = Read that the director said it was a bromance. No thank you. I will also keep my feelings on this being specifically a "bromance" to myself. Whatever. Watching Schrodingers BL Live since ep 3.

Thame - Po Heart That Skips a Beat = No thank you. I already don't love idol bls. But one thing I realized with Only Boo is that there is nothing GMMTV can do with this specific genre that isn't going to be massively hypocritical.

---

Pluto & Us = Binging at the end both. Sorry both stories use tropes I don't love.

My Love Mix Up = Only current show in the post. Binging this one when it's done too.

Ossan Love = I still haven't gotten to watching the original. Binging this.

---

For the ones that I will watch live I will try going on with my older attitude towards bls. As in I am here for the romance and the relationships (platonic and romantic) and litterally not caring about narrative or plot inconsistency and not expecting anything from them

[total side note: some of the shows that I have complaints about also made this attidude super difficult due to them messing up characters and relationships but whatever that's not the point]

Also for the following ones I am probably going to be a very passive watcher, back to occasional tag commentary if I have anything to say and that's it.

My Golden Blood = I mean this in the nicest possible way I can, I swear I am not hating, but I am expecting this one to be highly enjoyable trashy fun and nothing else.

Kidnap = I am going in expecting/wishing that the story will treat the problematic aspect with the care they deserve but that's it.

The Ex Morning = I am mostly just curious. I have no skin in this game nor any particular emotional attachement to KristSingto (no hate at all, in fact I do plan to rewatch Sotus and try again with Be My Favorite. I haven't always been able to connect with Krist's acting but I have seen a lot of posts about him and I want to do better at that)

Sweet Tooth, Good Dentist = Watching for Mark Pakin.

The Heart Killers = Mostly here for JoongDunk. Honestly low-key scared of FirstKhao fans to say anything more.

Perfect 10Liners = Honestly I am most excited about Santa and Perth then anything else (If it wasn't for the cast change I might have binged this too I wasn't a huge fan of the chimon and perth chemestry - no hate to Chimon on this post or anywhere around me I will be blocking you if you do that). Still dissapointed ForceBook didn't get anything different.

Exception (Sorry not sorry):

Revamp = This one is different for me, I have higher expectations and I am definetely the most exicted for this. I will probably be engaging more in meta and fandom in a way I won't bother for the other ones. This one is also only being released by GMMTV but still produced by Studio Wabi Sabi. And Boun is writing the script something I am very curious about.

[fullmetal-scar-simping]

I am!!!! Immensely enjoying your blog!!! Because yes yes YES by all means call out the nonsense both canon and fandom pull on Ishvalans!!! I haven't gone to check recently but when I checked a long time ago, the Ishval tag on tumblr was filled with white Amestrian Royai angst... and nary a shred of Ishvalans... BUT ANYWAYS

I don't know who the anon that talked about Scar's religious, theological, and academic pedigree because it's so so so good and I will think about it forever and also it made me think about an AU I haven't touched in a while (because not many are interested in Ishvalan centric thing, much less an OC thing I guess) and I won't rattle your ears about it here obviously I don't wanna bother you with it but man. I had this mixed OC character who's actually Miles' daughter who had Complicated feelings on him bc he was gone far too soon from her life due to getting arrested and held for who knows how long while her Amestrian mother died during that time and she just... fell through the cracks, and in that AU I characterized Miles as “yeah be a model citizen and change how Amestrians view Ishvalans :)” to his young little daughter who faced much bullying and discrimination at school, couldn't pass on any part of their Ishvalan heritage, and as a result the girl... felt insecure in her own blood and belonging and eventually finds a mentor/father figure in Scar and that ask about Scar's role in being a record-keeper and studied his people's history just reminded me of the dynamic the two had in my AU. I think I've rambled enough about my own AU despite saying I won't so I'll end the ask here but thank you for being a ray of hope for me and also hello anon I love you whoever you are!! (I might come back and maybe even off-anon!) Have a nice day, both of you!

Ahhh, thanks for the kind words! I'm always excited to hear how this blog has offered people something the fandom at large doesn't bother with. Scar and the Ishvalans/Ishbalans are so sorely ignored.

I haven't touched the Ishval tag on tumblr, but going by the abysmal results on other platforms that make Ishval and the genocide of Ishvalans all about the damn war criminals, I can't say I'm surprised. It likely hasn't gotten any better since you last checked. :/ Man even what little Scar posts and fanworks I can find often somehow revolve around the war criminals (he's just flavouring for their angst/battles/found family bonding and that content in particular tends to be mad derogatory).

:0! Oh shit, a pair of anons like ships in the night. I hope you two manage to find each other. If you're reading this, cool Miles/Scar shipper anon, you have a kindred spirit here too.

You're welcome to expound on your AU and your oc! If anything, thanks for sharing. Interesting that Miles gets arrested; had he been rounded up by the State for being half Ishvalan, or had he done something that his superiors wanted to punish or suppress? And poor kid got functionally orphaned, all while carrying the burden of "healing" the racism rampant in Amestrian society. It's perfectly in-character for Miles to teach his child that they have to prove to the world that the bigotry they all suffer is wrong, that they are 'worthy' humans all along. He himself seems to think that the racism and fascism Ishvalans are made to suffer from Amestrians is all some "big misunderstanding". That alongside the relentless bullying would mess anyone up, let alone a child.

Finding a mentor in someone who actually loves his people, and who can guide her in seeing where the true problems lie, listen to her pain, and teach her about her heritage (and how to fight) would be a boon to any Ishvalan kid. Scar would make an amazing guardian. 🥺

Aw, you're welcome! I don't know what else to say, but your message made me smile! I hope this blog can continue to be a bright spot for you for as long as you need it. Crossing my fingers that you and the other anon get to connect with one another real soon.

Hope you have a nice day too!

[moonybemine]

WHO WANNA BE BESTIES‼️ i need someone to giggle over hp with. you HAVE to be a jkr hater tho bc i hate terfs and am agender(im just vibin tho all gendered terms i use by vibe alone)

MINORS DNI

i have some Opinions on a lot of things about hp and i have some fluctuating emotions on certain characters. i genuinely treat every hp character like barbies that i play with and put into Shenanigans and Situations.

i will reading bashing fics especially albus ones i hate the things he did but i on occasion have been known to enjoy a good albus fic including ones where he's less "we have to kill voldy!!" and more "you (platonically or romantically)Love someone, dont you Tom?" like that spongebob meme. i do not like sirius or remus bashing, it's always overly harsh and vilifies a man locked away in the harshest prison who's mental faculties have been horribly abused, and while The Prank was an incredibly stupid attempt of a prank due to the danger it put severus in and also remus i ultimately believe it would've never happened in the first place if albus and minerva properly chastised the marauders earlier for their treatment of snape. we also don't know when this happened in the timeline of the marauders, was it before or after snape and lily's falling out. in remus' case he's a man who's been treated as a monster his whole life who was allowed into hogwarts by albus who then used this BOY'S gratitude to make him go into enemy territory and spy on and try to recruit people to the other side of the war. not to mention that albus groomed them all to fight the boy he FAILED(ive got so many opinions on tom and albus) and then when remus who support network was either dead or imprisoned he was told he couldn't raise harry and was told to not contact him. albus did all he fucking could to make harry miserable and pliable so that he'd sacrifice himself to end a war like a pig to slaughter. ur telling me Great Albus Dumbledore defeater of grindelwald couldnt find a solution to the horcrux besides having him walk to his death not to mention that he could've probably figured out horcruxes decades earlier and tried collecting them and probably would've succeeded! also i hate that the whole marauders generation is completely wiped out jkr u nasty bitch!

my ultimate fav ships are nottpott and wolfstar. ive BEEN a wolfstar lover since i was literally a child. nottpott entered my life last year and proceeded to ruin me on drarry(and pretty much every other ship involving harry and someone else or theo and someone else) i used to hate dramione bc i was apart of a toxic forum back in the day but i have grown to enjoy it bc it usually goes hand in hand with nottpott. i am forever a fremione and a pansmione gurlie tho. i love a lot of marauders ships as well jegulus/jily/jegulily/wolfstar/marylily/dorlene/pandalily/rosekiller/etc

i will mention i have dipped my toe into tomarry. i have enjoyed quite a few fics with this pairing and while i have enjoyed mostly ones where they are both teens, i do not like or support ones where its oldie voldie and literal child harry. its a grey area with somethings with them because of a multitude of factors and it shifts from a fic to fic basis. im not one to judge overly harsh over liking ships but i will judge in cases of straight up pedophilia but it will mostly result in a block because im not a child that starts fights on the internet anymore. i also do not support bestiality or incest and i'm specifying these things in particular due to a intimate relationship with the harry potter ao3 tag i know what freaks and weirdos exist there. literally the only fuckin fandom thats got a UNIQUE BESTIALITY tag

anyways msg me if ur interested <3

[ohai-there]

i just discovered and so the moon wept recently and i adore everything about it, its very much a fic i didnt know i needed but am so happy to have found thank u for blessing us with it🙇‍♂️ ur take on kakashi is so refreshing and well written i love him and i love u for putting him in a terrible situation and then having him utilize his intelligence and abilities to get himself out of it. would u mind sharing ur inspirations for the fic?

Haha thank you!

I've actually read through pretty much all of the Kakashi time-travel and Kakashi-centric fics and most of them felt... a bit too nice? Like the struggle wasn't enough, and often I felt that some author's writing styles were a bit difficult for me to enjoy and there just wasn't a fic that was exactly what I was looking for so I figured if no one was going to do it, I would have to... _(:з)∠)_

I find the often a simple but intriguing premise makes for a good way to build an AU in a way that hooks a reader, rather than starting from an entirely established AU which can cause a lot of confusion so! It was just Kakashi takes Obito's place, but since there's no plot because he's not an Uchiha that Madara would find use in, he's just gotta deal with it. I really wanted to explore Kakashi's mental state and his perspective!

My main inspiration is my mental illness! (joking, kind of) I took the above premise and basically just tossed it around in my head over and over again for months until I decided to write it, but as someone who doesn't actually watch the source material, I take massive inspiration from other fic in the fandom, which also is where I get a lot of my information lol.

My main fandom inspirations are:

In Good Company (Sasuke-centric fic where canon diverges and he kills Orochimaru and returns to Konoha + Sasuke can see the Hokage ghosts, crazy good writing style and dips into mature subjects, but can be a bit confusing for first time readers) by weialala

The Hidden Prodigy (Kakashi-centric time-travel fic, old, but changed something fundamentally in my brain since I was reading it while it was updating so many years ago) by Applepie

Of course, Blackkkat's fics - in particular their Sakumo/Orochimaru fics, even though they're no longer in the fandom. Their fics in particular really helped me in developing my characterisation of Sakumo, even though I feel that my Sakumo is quite different from theirs.

Talking about Sakumo, I also (funnily enough) took a lot of inspiration from my own, super old fic If Only We Were Leaf-born where you can see the beginnings of the Kakashi and Sakumo characterisation that I'd only just begun to create.

Because my naruto phase rolls around only every couple of years, I actually completely forgot I created this fic and the skin I use on my Ao3 doesn't easily show that the fic was created by me so when I was scrolling through the Sakumo tag this year, I came across it and was like "damn that's crazy! this fic is like,,.. exactly what I didn't know I needed in my life" and then halfway through I was like.... hold on a second, wtf I recognise this..... IT WAS ME???

It's actually crazy how many new fics have been made since 2020 and a bit sad to see how many older fics have disappeared... I had a lot of fun reading through the new juggernauts of the naruto fandom, especially since most of them hadn't been created or were just new babies when I fell out of the fandom.

Anyway, that's enough of my blabbing haha thank you for enjoying my fic!

[nautilusopus]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @subdee, may as well since it's been a while

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

40

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

590,973

3. What fandoms do you write for?

FFVII mostly, but none of that spinoff bullshit. I have some stuff for XV in the works despite hating XV and the characters having zero fucking personality because this is just my grieving process I guess??? They're basically all crossovers with VII except one though so ¯_(ツ)_/¯

I've also got a couple things for Spy X Family I'm excited for but unfortunately am a bit hamstrung due to certain reveals and lack of reveals so it's on pause.

(Also Ever Crisis and Remake back to back have sucked all the fucking joy out of me in one fell swoop so I'm trying to remember why I even fucking like doing this when FFVII has effectively been erased.)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1)The Number I.

Go read it. I worked hard on it and it's very dense and heavily character-driven and a genfic focused on plot, and, most importantly, is complete. I'm going to shill this one directly I ain't give a damn:

Predominately involves Cloud, now four years out from Meteorfall, struggling to adjust to civilian life given he's still gene-spliced with an Old God, who begins losing control of his body to a heretofore seemingly unknown entity with inscrutable goals. As it gradually becomes clear that the events of the previous four years aren't as they seem in more ways than one, things start to go off the rails completely as Cloud winds up enmeshed in conflict between multiple parties: an international initiative studying cosmology and the two doctors leading it; the WRO, who has considered him a Jenova-based liability from day one; interpersonal friction with his newfound family stemming from the residual baggage of everything he went through; and reality itself beginning to deteriorate.

It's slice of life, it's cosmic horror, it's a character study, it's about grown men crying and legacies and grief and trauma and intimacy and autonomy and gender as a microcosm for broader truths about the nature of the self, it's got angry tearful fistfights, bottoms that haven't figured out you can take it in turn to service top, Cloud telling everyone his strong and correct opinions about magic and materia and bikes, found family shenanigans, and me talking about garlic for way way way too long. Something for everyone!

I wasn't kidding about any of that by the way, heed the warnings at the top of the chapters because I do NOT pull punches and we get into some heavy shit. Go hard or go home.

Originally it was a 500 word pee joke I was gonna show to two people in response to a terrible LTD argument I saw someone make and was sure I'd "wrap it up quickly". Oops.

2) An Idiot's Guide to Holding Hands. I wrote this in response to, I'm not kidding, the worst most hateful fanfiction I have ever fucking seen in my life. As big of a beef as I have with the Crisis Core fuckers treating the women like shit and being pretty hateful towards them as a whole, they're still at least clearly writing because they genuinely love Crisis Core and the characters in it for reasons that are presently unknown to me. This thing on the other hand was oozing contempt for the cast of VII and Evangelion and the women in particular and I genuinely don't know why someone would put that much fucking effort into making something like this and felt a sudden need to rebut everything it stood for. It's not super great as a fic tbh but y'all seem to like it so at least something came of it.

3) Don't Ask How The Job Interview Went. Harry Potter/VII crossover I shat out in like 6 hours on a whim because a Halloween prompt one year was "witches and wizards" and I hated all the existing crossovers (ugh again with the crisis core). Honestly had an entire multichapter fic as a sequel lined up that I was pretty excited for but as things went on I felt grosser and grosser about even making it. Maybe I'll do something with the outline one day, it was basically finished. Still kills me that this thing is so fucking popular but there you go.

4) What's Dead and Buried. This is literally just Chapter 18 of The Number I (which you should go read!). I wrote it, realised it worked great as a standalone fic and gateway drug, and published it as its own thing. If you're on the fence about TNI, maybe check out this oneshot. Features shitty gremlin child Cloud interacting with Vincent and a lot of grim implications about both their lives that Cloud is too young to really get. Very very black comedy.

5) Adjacent. I don't like this one sorry. It was a commission and while I like the individual headcanons of freaky shit Cloud is inclined to do and was chomping at the bit to use them somewhere I don't like how they wound up getting utilised. Feels like generic fandom fluff to me. I'd delete it but people seem to enjoy it and I don't want to take that from them.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Always and as soon as I possibly can! I'm immensely flattered people actually take the time to comment on stuff and I enjoy getting to talk about the stuff I wrote in a bit more depth.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

It's Full of Stars easily. Fucked that dude up beyond repair. Also was considering a sequel for this one too so I could explore some of the stuff fueling what the fuck is going on here, though that might obviously ruin the ambiguity of said ending and what exactly was done to him.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I'm a big baby I actually almost always try for happy endings, or at least bittersweet. Probably Tidewaters, nobody even gets pulped in that one.

8. Do you get hate on fic?

Basically no. I've gotten five negative comments in all the years I've been doing this:

Two were people whinging about how I made Aeris Jewish in a fic and how that was reverse racist against Christians (die mad about it lol).

Two were someone that wanted an in-depth essay over my right to use a slur within the context of a character talking about people calling him that slur in a character arc partially about feeling alienated from gender and basically demanded I out myself to "prove" I could use it while missing literally everything about why that word would be used to where they felt the need to send that shit to begin with (gee thanks did you do it did you make the queers feel comfortable). Reading comprehension is so so important you are all going to kill me.

The last one was a long six paragraph rant completely unrelated to the fic in any way because I joked in the author's notes about not liking a video game that they liked(????), followed by an even longer ten paragraph rant about how actually the unrelated game was "95% perfect" (lmaoooo) and how "5% of it being bad isn't a good reason to hate it". The first half of it's on there, I deleted the second comment because my fanfiction comments are not the fucking gamefaqs forums dude. (Also die mad about it lol.) That remains to this day the only comment I've ever deleted from any of my fics and that includes the one that literally just said "penis" and nothing else.

9. Do you write smut?

If you squint lol. TNI has a couple sex scenes in it. They're uh

they're in it.

Boy are they in it.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Hell yeah I do. Also I'm a purist about this term A CROSSOVER IS WHEN YOU CROSS THE TWO THINGS OVER BUT THEY ARE STILL THEIR OWN DISPARATE THINGS. A FUSION IS WHEN THE TWO SETTINGS ARE FUSED. WORDS MEAN THINGS. ALSO A DRABBLE IS 100 WORDS EXACTLY NO MORE NO LESS. I'LL KEEP SITTING ON THIS PORCH SHAKING MY FIST AT THESE CHILDREN UNTIL THEY FUCKING LEARN.

Anyway I'll dump FFVII on everything and nobody can stop me. FFXV. Mass Effect. Spy X Family. Aliens. Ellen Ripley can, should, must, and will fight Jenova with a power loader.   

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nah I talk a big game but I ignore the Comp too hard to break into the mainstream. I'm small potatoes.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nah and no surprises why. Shit's too wordy.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiind of? Fuck I gotta finish that thing.

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

meh. Does Loid/Yor even count? Everyone keeps writing it wrong and we still haven't seen the penny drop but it's sweet in its extremely fucking dysfunctional way (which is the best way GO READ TNI COUGH COUGH).

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably won’t?

Frame-Perfect. Should not have started writing before finishing the damn outline, don't know how to resolve this thing without it being a massive downer any way you slice it. This is why you should never pants VARETH.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue babyyyyyyy. I literally won an award for it once lol. Probably also psychological horror. Those two things combined means there's a lot of stream of consciousness shit in nearly everything I do, and if that's not your jam you probably won't like it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

It is so, so hard to get a character from a location to another location. It shouldn't be hard. Why is it hard??? I should be allowed to just go And then he went, in exactly that cadence every time and everyone should just deal with it UGH 

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Extremely hit or miss and you can almost always tell if the person in question doesn't speak it. Use sparingly because you are playing with fire.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

FFVII. The Number I is technically my first fanfiction ever, actually!

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Either TNI obviously, but also as a whole either Replacements or Tidewaters. Replacements I whipped up on the spot day-of in a few hours on a whim and it basically turned out perfect???? I've never been able to replicate that before or since. Tidewaters is Cloud Yuffie Nanaki shenanigans which I love, and I was shocked and horrified to learn I'm basically the entire tag of that as far as that's concerned (I'm working on rectifying that I promise shhhh).

Everyone I know that writes was already tagged basically uhhhhhhh

@varethinsilico, @denebolaleo-ffwriter, @spectroscopes, @terror-billie, @jenovacomplete, anyone else who wants to take a crack at this pretend I tagged you.

[nuclearjacks]

4, 16 and 33 for the artists ask game

This is a long post so be warned kdjcjdkdjd vvv

4. A piece you wish got more love

Probably most of my content that isn’t TF related! Would love more interactions on my OC/Sona and other fandom content, especially my BG3 art right now, but I also understand as someone who’s interest based why that stuff usually doesn’t perform well djxndjdj

A lot of people follow an artist for one particular thing and when they don’t make that particular thing, people usually aren’t that interested unless you followed an artist for their style or something (is my assumption anyways djdjdjdj)

Some examples here below vvv (all of which you can find if you search my art tag: jaxsart on my profile!)

But I will say the non TF content that I think was really well received was my Spidersona <3 I got a wonderful fanart piece for her and I’m so happy people loved her design cause I was also really proud and happy with how she turned out. Still planning to make more content for her in the future! She’s pictured below here vvv

16. How do you motivate yourself to draw?

I’m honestly still figuring that one out lol

I usually only draw when I want to since I’m not an artist who relies on commissions or the like to keep myself afloat. But I’ve also been hitting an art funk as of late and while I do want to draw, it’s been really hard to draw cause of the skill I want to incorporate in my drawings now. It either takes me longer or I end up hating the process because of how long it takes or because of how hard it is. So that effects my motivation heavily because all the cons stated above is what makes me not want to draw 😅

I’m currently trying to find a balance of what makes me happy while drawing and how to make my art look good to myself again since I’ve been hating it so much. I’ve been looking into different techniques, learning more in depth lighting and shading techniques and need to do more anatomy studies as that’s getting rusty again and I’ve been getting lazy cjxndjdj

All in all, I still draw when I want to, but I think the big motivating factor is wanting to see the end product. I just want to be able to finish the WIPS I have and the visions I see in my head and get them out into the world so others can see them too. I wanna say that I finally made that thing or actually did it!! That’s probably my biggest motivating factor right now. But we’re still figuring it out 😊

33. Have you taken a lot of art classes?

I took a handful as a kid, got to play with pastels once, made clay art, learned photoshop, learned to paint, a whole bunch of stuff! My parents have always been very supportive of my art and really helped foster a lot of that so I went to plenty of classes through out my childhood and teen years.

When I was in college, the last classes I took were all for my bachelors (which I dropped out of later on cjcjdjfj). I think the most helpful one was my life drawing class though. I’m gonna do one of those stereotypical artist things where I *highly* recommend you take a life drawing class if you want to learn more about anatomy or different techniques to implement into your art. They’re so good for growing your skill massively in a short period of time. My first drawings we did for gesture drawing look horrid compared to my later studies!

Always always always take a life drawing class if you’re able!

Thank you for the asks! <3

[providing-leverage]

Fic in Review 2023

This looks fun, thanks to @writer-and-thrasher for the tag

Total Number of Completed Stories: 16, which is great because my goal was 12 (one a month, which didn't happen, but oh well)

Total Word Count: 77,440! Again, I had a goal and surpassed it (getting to 300k on my account) and it feels really good.

Fandoms Written In: So much Ted Lasso, which I discovered after Sunflowers came out and was trending. I saw canon gay characters and went sign me up even if I don't normally like comedy stuff. I'm super glad I did because I've not written so much for a fandom so fast since my Shadowhunters hyperfixation years ago. Other than those 12, I did some PJO, Supernatural, and Batman, and Teen Wolf.

Looking back did you expect to write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expect: so much less! Ted Lasso brainworms truly won this year

What’s your own favorite story of the year, personally?: I'm super proud of myself for finishing Past and Present Now Embrace, one of my few non Ted Lasso fics. Bianca was a very interesting character and the Percy Jackson universe it a great sandbox to play in.

Did you take any writing risks this year?: I think my trend towards gen stuff, because obviously romantic stuff gets more hits a lot of the time so I've trained myself to sprinkle it in even when it doesn't really need to be there. But with Ted Lasso I really felt like I could embrace the platonic stuff and when I did write romance it was because I wanted to.

Do you have any fanfic goals for the New Year?: I want to write a multichapter, and I'm hoping that multichapter will be either Stranger Ranger or Guard Your Heart. I've also been watching to rework the second and third parts of SSA Sam Singer.

Best story of the year: personally I'm really proud of the Fundamentals of Love and Lying, which is so self indulgent

Most popular story of the year: Get It Off Your Chest for sure, and I think that's all to do with the blurb I used in the summary

Most personal story of the year: Oh for sure it's a rather touching notion which is also probably the one I wrote the quickest. An aroace character figuring out who they are, feeling outside of so many social interactions because they lack romantic and sexual attraction? Pure projection. Also The A Team because yay autism.

Funniest story of the year: While the summary for Get it Off Your Chest is funny, Colin's reasons for picking up lesbians is deeply sad so I can't really say that. Eliza's exasperation with Jamie in Flowers for Dani is pretty funny though.

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: Fundamentals took a lot of work but it's also a rarepair I invented the tag for and narrated by a character that is basically an OC, so I understand why it's not everyone's cup of tea.

Most fun story to write: Holy Novelty Socks Batman is pure fluffy crack and made me smile a lot

Story with the sexiest moment: none of them really. Fundamentals and some of the other TL fics have some sex allusion though.

Sweetest story of the year: I'll say Shake It Out, a teen wolf fic from early this year that I'd completely forgotten about. What's sweeter than breaking into your school at night for a date?

“Holy crap that’s wrong even for you!” story: dito on not doing scandalous, but for angst then maybe this fic where I give Dani my caffeine sickness

Hardest story to write: Past and Present Now Embrace, for sure took the longest, with me working on it for over a year. I wanted to get it up before the Sun and the Star came out but that didn't happen.

Biggest disappointment: Not any published fic in particular but I have a lot of drafts I wish had been able to see the light of day this year

Biggest surprise: the community I feel like I've found this year, especially within Ted Lasso. Doing these tag games, trading asks and ideas with other writers, is something I've never gotten to do before and I feel so lucky and grateful for my mutuals.

Speaking of... @orbitalpirate @mearpsdyke @manwholovescabins sorry if any of you have already been tagged

[ryanthedemiboy]

20 Questions for fic writers

(I was tagged by @annachibi )

Note: i'm combining answers for all three of my pseuds/both accts

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 56 :)

Ana's response: "18, I'm not very prolific haha"

That's so much! iirc the average person has like 2 fics under 3k total!

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 231,440 :D

3. What fandoms do you write for? Right now it's Fullmetal Alchemist. I may or may not go back to Marvel at some point. And I may move on to another fandom at some point :)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Four of the five are from my Ed is Dying series c: #1, 6, 7, 3. The fifth is an HP fic I wrote in 2016.

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes! It's extremely rare that I don't; only if I have nothing to say.

Ana's answer: "Yes, just about every one! Sometimes I don't if it's been multiple years since I wrote the thing and I don't have much to say back, since I figure some people don't necessarily want the author to respond anyway."

I promise you, almost everyone wants the author to respond! And the ones who don't just aren't going to check them xD

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Oh this is an excellent question. I have to be careful here, because spoilers. The end of the first fic in my spn series ended in a suicide that was unclear that he survived (he did). And then I have the death fic for my Ed is Dying series written, that's angsty af. There's also a fic I wrote recently on my semi-secret AO3 acct that doesn't seem angsty but it really fucking is.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Uhhh... I need to go look.

I forget if Out of the Box (MCU non-sexual age regression) had a happy ending, but basically the whole fic was gentle happiness. Same with Cas and the Bee Bag (spn. This is 9 years old)

I do not appear to have any other fics that are happy. Interesting, neutral, enjoyable, positive, sure. Not happy 😂

8. Do you get hate on fics? Not thus far

9. Do you write smut? Sometimes

10. Do you write crossovers? Not usually. It's very rare that I will. The main one I can think of is unpublished, idk if I even have it tbh — I had to write a crossover fic with A Scarlet Letter for my English class in 11th grade. I chose Doctor Who xD I believe that remains the only fic i've written for doctor who.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that i'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes! It was a blast. I forget why, but I asked my friend not to list me as a co-author.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship? Riza/Al, I think.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? My spn series. I am so many levels of uninterested, and even if I did, i'd have to rewrite it from scratch bc it's not up to par, anymore, and is extremely insensitive in parts (in particular, I have Cas using bible pages as the rolling paper for his weed. He is not xian. That's just what I remember off-hand). All that said, i would love to finish it.

16. What are your writing strengths? Emotion. Hitting the reader where it hurts.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Anything with happiness 😂

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I have done it both ways. And both are kind of cringey for me, when i've written them in the past.

Generally, the best way is to use italics to signify another language, and specify that language, as long as the POV person understands it.

19. First fandom you wrote for? HP

20. Favorite fic you've written? Talk about a good question. Probably one of the kink fics i've written. I love how i've had the characters be with each other, and shown their love for each other. I also love some of the drabbles i've made — it's hard to get a fic to exactly a word count, and getting an entire fic in so few words is a massive challenge, and very rewarding.

I'm not going to tag anyone, but if you want to do this, go for it!

Blank questions to easily copy/paste (incl on the app) below.

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 2. What's your total AO3 word count? 3. What fandoms do you write for? 4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 5. Do you respond to comments? 6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? 7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? 8. Do you get hate on fics? 9. Do you write smut? 10. Do you write crossovers? 11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? 12. Have you ever had a fic translated? 13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? 14. What's your all-time favorite ship? 15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? 16. What are your writing strengths? 17. What are your writing weaknesses? 18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? 19. First fandom you wrote for? 20. Favorite fic you've written?

[pure-jeff-ward]

I asked you the other day about the jeffward_appreciation instagram because it looks like they are screenshotting some of the pics you have posted.

So I assumed they must be following your blog.

Imho I think it’s ok to share things if they come from public accounts. As Jeff and most of his colleagues are public figures they are able to control their own narrative but it’s a different story coming from private accounts like Jeff’s sister who is not part of the biz. And tagging his sister is just so weird. I just wish fans can be more respectful and self-aware.

ooooh I see, I see... well there is every chance they could be following my blog and are one of the many many 500+ followers I have now! hee! since none of the pics are actually mine, I don't mind getting them screenshotted, though I would hope they're giving credit to where it's due, but I don't know how IG works and all that so....

everything you said in that last paragraph is 100000% true!!!

"they are able to control their own narrative"

^^^ this is what it should be about and even though it seems like it's a very obvious thing, sometimes that's what people don't pause and think about when it comes to celebrity lives and their friends and family too - everything turns into a commodity in this media frenzied world we live in nowadays; it's also one reason why I've learned to ignore, unfollow and block negativity that has been very rampant in other fandoms I was a part of - I don't think we need to put celebs on pedestals and see them as this otherworldly type of a figure and then pull them down and comment on their appearances and make fun and joke around when we feel like it; actors are humans first and foremost, just like you and me and everyone else and I respect them so much for putting themselves in the spotlight because I would never be able to do that myself.

And I guess me highlighting that particular line and going on this tinyyy ramble after the fact also proves that sometimes - more often than not, the narrative gets out of their control and into the fan's hands, which... if it is done with respect and self-awareness can be a good thing... I could probably go on and on and on about this for a while! 😅 so I'll just end it here, thanks for letting me know though! :p

[captainaikus]

MOVEOUT.

So this is something I've been thinking about for a while, and I'm planning to move to ao3 for getting my works out since I've been shadowbanned by tumblr, however that's not the only reason. Just my opinion on my blog and if you don't wanna read it, just scroll away.

I’ve come to realize that tumblr is not a space for my writings. I say this even if I’m glad to know that I have over 1k followers here, but at the same time what is the point of it? Over a period of time I also figured that the pace of consuming content here is not a normal one. Some of you do appreciate what I write and I’m thankful for that, but at the same time majority of the people out there demand for a part 2 to things when they haven’t bothered to interact with my content. I also don’t want to be responsible for checking my followers or to see that minors are interacting with my content despite my rules saying so when I'm here to write my content and leave it there.

Tumblr is more of an interactive platform among authors and readers alike and as you have noticed - I’m not a very interactive one. The only relationship I do care about here is the one between me and my readers since that is the sole reason I was here in the first place; Now talking about the author/ writer community here - it’s not a very healthy one either since there tends to be discourse, offensive bantering and sometimes even friendships falling apart when you don’t see eye to eye. Not to mention (and I'm not pointing fingers at one particular person but just people in general) behaviors get rubbed off really easily. And the last thing I need to see on my dash - normally or otherwise is that blank blogs are not allowed to follow them or pressure for readers to contribute to a fandom by reblogging their works. And I strongly believe that readers should do as they wish (as long as its not harming anyone) rather than being pressured to form an opinion based off someone else's. Not to mention, big time authors are entering small fandoms despite gaining huge followings in other fandoms which leaves very little chances for small time authors which makes it difficult for them to get their work out - not speaking out of my insecurity or anything but it’s a very unfair system. My move to ao3 also has to do with the fact that you can write comments or give kudos if you want, but you don't have to reblog to show your support to me. Just kudos and comments are enough. Another reason why my work isn't suited for tumblr is to do with the fact that the place has become too predictable with a lot of smut just for the sake of getting likes or follows and for the sake of algorithm as well. It's been two years since i've read any decent fics now and I don't even search the tags anymore. Erotica is a piece of writing but honestly, writing has been lost here as there is more emphasis on the prior compared to the plot and the plot is something my focus is on in a story.

Ever since I started writing for blue lock, there have been reports of my works being flagged down and due to that my interactions and the pace of my uploads have died down. With that being said, my space (and tumblr) has turned toxic, with people wanting to leave rude comments, accuse me that I’m plagiarizing author’s works and arguing about it in my askbox - without even spending a moment to think that we write for the same genre and we’re allowed to have coinciding themes as well as dialogues. When it comes down to me checking the tags to see if my work has showed up, I see a lot of authors paraphrasing my work and sometimes writing lines similar to what I wrote in my fics. Where’s the protection for my dignity or pointing out to them that they’ve taken my work?

Nothing. Just silence.

That’s not the only thing I’m upset about. It’s also to do with the lack of sensitivity some people have here. I take time out of my day to write these fics. I spend energy on what I write going through every line and making sure that I have it right and what do you do? Take 2 minutes out of your day to report my work - something that I spend hours on despite having a busy work life. Do you not think how much it can hurt a person to see their hard work go to waste like that? It’s just proving that some of your immaturity is very underserving for my writing despite me writing my pieces for you since its a self insert. And I don’t want to interact or know people like that cause it disgusts me. Not to mention, its an act of cowardice since you're hiding on the other side of the screen while I'm out here making my content and enjoying my interactions. To people who report my writing and send me hateful asks : For the record, you didn't make me quit writing. You just showed me how fucking sorry and pitiful you are, the fact that you would be a miserable wretch to live with and that no one likes you; it makes me wonder how pathetic you are in real life if this is how you are online. Now with my move to ao3, I can create my own content without having to worry about what I write or if I'm copying someone else's writings cause I'll be sticking to my dash and my works. And here I can upload anytime and take the pace that I like rather being rushed into it.

So question is... what am i going to do with this blog? Stay active. People are interested in my works - so i'm gonna make announcements and release early spoilers for my writings on ao3 here as well as interact better with my readers who want to stay on anon or off it along with opinions and feedback based on my work. Other than that, i also want to continue hosting character interviews/ asks and matchups with every milestone i hit! This ends with my official moveout to ao3. And I hope you enjoy my writings there !!

[sanversandfriends]

Fic isn't just an act of repair as Henry Jenkins says, but sometimes a safe place in which to tear everything apart. Here to talk about diving into those darker and grittier character spaces is @nerdsbianhokie, a writer who's been captivating Sanvers and Director Sanvers fans for years.

Tell us a little about yourself. How did you get started writing fic? Have you written for other fandoms? What are your favorite tropes?

Over two decades ago, I was six years old and reading a new book and had the sudden realization that I wanted to make people feel like that book made me feel. Since then, I've been a writer. The first fic I wrote was before I even knew fanfic was a thing. I was barely thirteen years old and all about CSI and had this vivid idea of a very short scene. I quickly found places where fic was hosted, and began to read and post.

Since then, I've moved through fandoms, sometimes staying for a time, like with Bering and Wells, other times only lingering for a brief moment. I watched Supergirl between season 1 and two, after learning that Maggie Sawyer, one of my favorite comic book characters (one of the first openly lesbian characters in mainstream comics? out before the comic code was done away with? what's not to love) was joining the show. I didn't watch beyond the first few episodes of season 3, but the characters have a hold of me and aren't letting go.

Since my time in the Bering and Wells fandom, angst and aus have been my favorite spaces to play in. Exploring darker spaces in the safety of fiction has always been a draw of writing to me, and the Supergirl characters can fit so well in so many different universes.

What were your inspirations for this particular story? What was it about this/these ships that grabbed you?

This fic started as a tumblr post by magicmumu2 about Alex and Maggie reuniting years later because their kids keep getting in trouble at school. I then made it sad by giving Alex a recently dead wife.

I really fell into the idea that Alex and Maggie did move on after their breakup, but then remeet at a later point in their lives. When thinking on how Alex might move on in a way I find interesting, I landed on my beloved Lucy Lane. My ultimate ship for Supergirl is Director Sanvers, so I've written all combinations of Alex, Maggie, and Lucy over the years, but the idea that Alex was happy with Lucy, but then lost Lucy and found Maggie again while still mourning, really pulled me in

Has the time spent away from your story changed your outlook or approach to any of the storylines or themes? Have you had any new inspirations or breakthroughs/revelations in the meantime? 

The time away hasn't really changed much, as I've been distracted by so many other fics, but having new eyes on it has really helped me figure out some things I was stuck on that kept me from working on it more.

 Any advice for new or aspiring fic writers?

Write. The best thing you can do is get ink on the paper. Writing is an art that needs to be practiced just like any other. As somebody with a degree in creative writing, I think the time I've spent writing and the amount of writing I've done has, cumulatively, done more for me than all the classes I took. 

If you were going to promote this fic with a single line, what would it be? 

A deep look into grief and healing, mourning and love.

If you’ve already posted some of your work, please provide a link. 

This is the original post, with the prompt and my initial addition.

I have also posted two separate fics that aren't part of this one but are in the universe as I worked out how Alex and Lucy got together and their family dynamic.

[kimkhimhant]

Sorry x

I stumbled across your post while trying to learn about ace experiences (partly because I'm questioning atm for various reasons). Youtube videos on the topic are repetative and don't give as much insight into actual experience, just rebuttles to assumed questions being asked (I had literally no expectations or questions in mind other than my friends as frame of reference and 'Am I ace?').

I still feel conflicted about it all and the mutually shitty tone allo and ace people persistently use with each other. Belittling the validity of everyone's experiences. I don't like how both allonormativity and a lot of ace discourse cordons off or ignores the nuances of human experience.

I've always been literally socialy isolated and hated to the point of people throwing stuff and physically attacking me on the street for existing as I am (autistic) anytime I leave the house, and I've never related to any character that's shared any of my identity with me (stuck to non-fiction because fiction books were like reading the perspective of my bullies). I may not know exactly how you feel and whether I do or not you are still valid.

I was excluded from allonormativity on the assumption by everyone around me that I was ace specifically because of both the conflation of autism and asexuality and the ways both are dehumanised by wider society. People assumed I was ace and were blatantly aphobic and ablist to me. I know aphobia from experience despite not being ace. Nothing I said in that reblog was an attack.

(I'll shut up now)

hi, i appreciate you taking the time to send a message. i had already received some anons over the post i made and it made me extra sensitive, so your tags in particular, with the "complaining about sex on tumblr is like complaining the sky's still blue" or whatever rubbed me the wrong way and felt like it was invalidating my feelings on the matter. thank you for reaching out to correct that.

i'm also autistic and i definitely understand what you mean – the lack of true representation is incredibly alienating and isolating, especially when that isolation is already our lived experience.

i know you saw my response before i deleted it – i don't have issue with there being a lot of allo rep and sex in fandom; my main frustration is that often when there is ace rep where an ace character is sex-repulsed, touch-adverse, whatever, it's depicted as a shortcoming that that character should be trying to overcome. i'm sure you can probably relate, what with autistic characters needing to become "less autistic" to get their happy ending in a lot of media 🙃 it's like there's always something about us that needs to be fixed to suit other people's wishes, and it's exhausting.

i hope you find peace with your own personal identity journey – i know with the asexuality spectrum, it can be really difficult to figure out where you land. (i have known i was on the aroace spectrum since i was 14 and i'm 26 now and still unsure if there even is a label that fits my experience)

anyway, thanks again for reaching out