#also my voice hurts
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Damn tryna play songs on the piano is HARD man. Like. I've played so much more complicated than this but because I'm tryna sing at the same time I just fuck up CONSTANTLY it's incredibly frustrating
#also my voice hurts#also I'm tired#also I don't even know if my voice is cut out for this sort of song lmao#but OH WELL#reminding myself I do this cuz I love it#and it's pretty fun and the end result will be epic#but it's difficult lmao#this is my first time venturing into simultaneous playing and singing#and even into modern music#because I grew up learning classical and this is a drastic genre shift lmaoo#going from chopin straight to mckenna grace and back again...#learning you ruined nirvana if anyone cares#maybe I'll post my cover when it's finally done lmaoo#I've only done like a verse so far#BUT it's my first time and it's only been two days so I'm pretty proud#anyway#cass thinks ab stuff
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Today's singing too loud in the car songs:
Face Down by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Fences by Paramore
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she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.
my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.
my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.
my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.
at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.
my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.
i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.
two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.
it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.
#writeblr#wlw#i often think about like.....#being happy in a gay relationship is sometimes so odd#bc u can forget how stupid ppl are.#bc ur so USED to being gay. and u forget other people GENUINELY ARE homophobic#so it's like. girl pardon?????#but also there are moments where it's like. ohhh the kids are alright#like watching someone razz someone else.... so fucking wholesome#“lemme get this bitche's pronouns before i make gentle fun of them” .... i would have KILLED for that.#THAT is how u know ur accepted#not just tolerated#..... when ppl are like. sure ur nonbinary congrats but WHAT is this fucking sunscreen application#ps idk if "razz'' is a real word but someone asked what it means -#i've always heard it as being a term for 'gentle & friendly teasing'' which like#i personally notice more from my guy friends but is like - when a person isn't#LIKE ACTUALLY teasing u (it's nothing personal/mean) they're just laughing w/you about something#my friends often put on a little voice and call me an anemic little bitch#like 'ooooo the anemic little bitch is cold??? does she need a mouse blanket#bc she's SOOOO SMALL AND ANEMIC???''#and it doesn't hurt my feelings (it makes me laugh very hard) bc 1. i actually called MYSELF that first#and 2. i'm not sensitive about it!!!#a proper razz is when you are ALSO in on the joke - i ALSO think it's funny#for some people i personally find that when they razz u it's when they love u -#they've noticed something genuine about u and love u enough that u know they're not being mean#this is cultural and personality based of course but i'm hispanic#if someone isn't making fun of me it means they hate me . obviously.
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after jasons death bruce "accidentally" slips harvey a crowbar while hes in arkham and kisses his cheek and says, voice soft and colder than ice, "make him hurt for me honey"
it takes 6 guards to sedate and drag two face off the joker the next time two face sees him and for the rest of their lives as soon as harvey sees the joker he goes after him like a rabid dog.
#harvey voice: you know why im not killing you jokes? cause you can only die once and i want to hurt you so much more than i want to kill you#jason was harveys baby too after all#spent my entire boring work meeting thinking about how robin!jason bruharvey would end in the joker dying no matter what bc of two face#this is all bruciemilfs fault btw. theyve been making me insane about bruharvey#bruce wayne#harvey dent#two face#also bruce doesnt tell harvey to kill or not kill the joker bc he cant request someones death#but he also cant make himself ask for his sons murderer to be spared#i dont think any version of bruce would be comfortable with openly planning someones death let alone actually doing it#but after jasons death he gets so cold and numb to everything that he just turns away from it#he knows hes being too violent.knows hes hurting people too much but the only time hes not remembering how small jasons body was in his arms#is when his blood is roaring in his ears during a fight. maybe if he becomes the worst monster in gothams shadows#no more little boys will go cold and silent. no more fathers will stand in the doorway of rooms that will never be full again
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Neurodivergency is bursting into song in the middle of the night and that song is BlackBoxWarrior -OKULTRA by Will Wood.
And yes i know all the lyrics
Yes i did spend like 3 days learning them slowly
If you dont know the song please look it up this is something im way too proud of because its so dumb
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Ah maybe I haven’t mentioned it to tumblr very often, but I’ll add this to my bio. But;
⚠️PLEASE DO NOT RE-UPLOAD MY FANART TO OTHER WEBSITES⚠️
#I don’t really know why people do this tbh#fandubbers on YouTube and tiktok make sense to me cuz they’re adding voices#but the reposters…why?#also please no monetizing!!!! it really hurts me when I see that#this is my favorite hobby#I don’t create anything for profit and no one pays me to make things#so it’s a gut punch to see people try to profit off the fanart I create
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[ ID in ALT ]
he giggles
#wriothesley#neuvillette#wriolette#neuvithesley#genshin impact#he goes aheeheehooheehoohee#i think once neuvillette figures out how to make him laugh. he'd do it all day. and the formula is simple too he just gotta say something#really stupid. and absurd. in his usual super serious iudex voice#and wriothesley is in stitches. it's so easy. he just gotta say 'yippee' and profit. 'slay queen' and wriothesley is incapacitated#also. imagine he's ticklish. but i dont think Neuv would tickle him intentionally I think he's like. 'i heard tickling gets violent fast'#'i will not resort to that to summon moethesley'#he doesn't want to Hurt Him he just wants to see him smile and laugh and be all pink in the face. but I do think he accidentally#sets him off all the time. with kisses (neck/ears) or just like grabbing his waist and suddenly wriothesley violently Wriggles yknow.#the tickled reaction. wriothesley laments the destruction of his scary big dog image every day#but. neuvillette would only make jokes at home anyway. and to be clear it's the simple fact that neuvillette is trying to Be Funny .#that's really funny to wriothesley. or just like his awkwardness. back before he figures out he can Intentionally make wriothesley laugh#he'd bewitch him with his his gap moeism#the layers to it. Wriothesley gets embarrassed later on when he catches on because he Knows Neuvillette likes seeing him all tickled.#and flustered. and that's like so mortifying bro what do you mean you're happy just seeing me being moe#and he's embarrassed because he should not be falling for it every single time. it should not be this funny#the nerves just makes him laugh even harder. and the whole time neuvillette is just sitting there. silently delighted. waiting for the#perfect comedic timing. so he can drop a 'cowabunga!' with the exclaimation mark and all. wriothesley can't even catch his damn breathe#art#my art
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summer is coming so i'm giving them the beach day they deserve
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itadori yuuji#fushiguro megumi#kugisaki nobara#gojo satoru#nanami kento#fanart#jjk fanart#yuuji#megumi#nobara#gojo#nanami#the drinks r non alcoholic do not worry#and one of them Is megumi's however yuuji Will b taking a generous sip#do not talk 2 me about perspective i am trying my hardest man water is so hard.............#i omitted yuuji's scars and nanami nobara n gojo r . u kno. Here .#so this is probably set pre-shibuya but idc enough to figure out a timeline#megumi voice Whatever!!! i just want them 2 have fun on the beach :(#i want gojo to hurl them in2 the water i want nobara 2 play fetch w the dogs i want them to shake themselves off all over nanamis stuff :((#so glad my hyperfixation media is so lighthearted . so glad it doesnt hurt every time i think abt them . so glad this is canon actually.#gotta do everything myself in this household smh#sighs . we cope !#drawing this made me think back to an old fb zine piece i did where they were Also on a beach#n that piece took MONTHS n this took 2 days so thats a bit of growth there babey#anyway all that 2 say i am drained but i am victorious
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I thought I was done talking about Style in THK's episode 2, but jokes on me, no I'm not.
I keep thinking about Style and Bison's first interaction and how pure and sweet it was. In the middle of the mess that is this 4-way whirlwind of lies and deception, it felt like a refreshingly honest conversation between two people who are only accidentally lying to each other.
Style seems incredibly earnest when he tells Bison that Kant is "down bad" for him. It doesn't feel like Style is 'wingmanning' Kant here; or if he is, it isn't meant to be malicious or to mislead Bison. It feels like someone being friendly with his bff's crush and hoping that they can get along because he thinks this one's going to stick around.
Similarly, when Bison tells Style to go for Fadel for real, it feels very honest and earnest. Setting aside whatever games Bison is playing with Kant, Bison seems to genuinely want someone for his big brother, and not just so he can date who he wants or as a distraction.
It's also interesting how Style's protest is that he can't see himself actually gaining feelings for Fadel because in a way there's nothing to recommend Fadel to Style at this point. As far as Style is concerned, Fadel is arrogant and condescending, rude and ungrateful (after all, he did replace a bunch of parts in Fadel's car for free), a stick in the mud about his brother dating, and can't seem to take a joke.
We see the polite, pleasant and reasonable Fadel, but Style doesn't.
Which is why I've been obsessing over Style's expressions immediately after the conversation with Bison. Bison's parting insight is "He's rough on the outside, and on the inside," and I think he accidentally piqued Style's curiosity with that line. Because why does Bison still want his brother to have a "real" relationship, then? What makes Fadel worth loving, despite (what Style thinks is) nothing to recommend him?
Ugh I wish I knew how to make gifs because BLESS @airenyah FOR MAKING THESE GIFS!!! Dunk goes through a whole sequence of expressions here that suggests a shift happens in the way he's thinking of Fadel. There's a pensive and thoughtful look and then almost like, "Oh what the hell, might as well see where this goes" kind of amusement at the end. And I think the reason he has this shift is because he's realised that Bison clearly loves his brother and that must mean that there's more to Fadel then his initial impression of the man.
It's interesting that his next attempt at messing with Fadel actually invites Fadel to play along with it. It's so much tamer and more private than the previous attempts because he isn't actively trying to humiliate Fadel this time. And it works?? Fadel engages in the roleplay, indulges Style's ridiculousness, actually chops faster (whilst the most hysterical series of minute expressions play over Fadel's face <3). Perhaps this was Style testing the waters: can Fadel engage with something playful and not take everything way too seriously? Huh, turns out, he can!
The next time Style shows up around Fadel, he's circled back to that playful over-the-top flirting that characterised the garage scene. This is the first time in this episode that Style is actually flirting. Every other time was just to frustrate/humiliate Fadel but notice how he's actively trying to look attractive to Fadel now? He's putting all his best (ahem) assets on display, and poor Fadel has no real protection against this. And, oh, Style is loving this! He's gleefully lapping up every single time Fadel fails to completely hide that he's affected by him.
This, though. THIS precisely is the point I think Style decides that he really does want Fadel for himself. There's so much playing out over Style's face: the determination to push things further, the delighted surprise to see Fadel so rattled, the razor sharp focus, and then desire. Style has finally broken through Fadel's "roughness" and he loves it.
If that uncle hadn't walked in, I'm convinced Fadel would have let Style do anything he wanted, and I think Style knew that.
It's the first time Style immediately chases after Fadel when he walks away from him, and he's absolutely delighted when Fadel all but chokes him against the lockers because that means he still has Fadel within reach.
The whole conversation about "love at first sight" is breathtaking because it feels like Style is discovering what's going to make Fadel crack as he says it and realising just how much he wants this. And no, I don't think he's in love with Fadel yet (not by a LONG shot), but I think he realises that he wants Fadel to fall in love with him. This is such a shift from what he expressed in the diner to Bison. In the diner, there was no hope, no chance for this.
The kisses catch Style by surprise too: you can see that he's just reacting, pushing to see where Fadel will finally draw the line. Because Fadel kisses back in the first kiss and actually fails to push Style away for quite some time in the 2nd kiss (the camera purposely lingers on the way Fadel's hands hover over Style's waist without shoving him back). The third kiss is the point Fadel finally starts fighting, and in the immidate aftermath you can see Style watching so carefully again. And Fadel nearly kisses him again, you see the way Fadel's eyes drop to Style's lips, the way they both freeze and linger in the moment for that one second. The way Style registers that moment and it leaves Style shaken himself.
It's so interesting that this is how we leave Style in this episode (we only see Fadel's fantasy version of Style after this point). I've got two possible interpretations for this line:
Style possibly catches on that Fadel is more dangerous than he seems. Maybe just from vibes, maybe from something in the way Fadel threatened him that kicks off some kind of fearful instinct. This could be what makes Style start questioning if Kant told him the full story and lead to whatever scene it is where Style demands answers in the episode 3 preview.
Alternatively, perhaps Fadel is starting to become real to Style in ways he wasn't before. Fadel was almost a caricature of a man, one which Style didn't like very much before, and that made it easier to fool around with him. But this? This almost tortured man who clearly wants Style but can't seem to give into that desire? Something is going on and Style isn't sure it's worth the game to either of them anymore. Because maybe Style recognises that he's more affected than he should be. And that has implications that Style was not ready for.
#this is also secretly an appreciation post for Dunk's fucking stellar acting in this episode because taking all these screenshots really#made me aware of how quickly Style shifts through expressions but also how CLEAR they are??#Style is SO expressive - and not just in his eyes or lips; but the way he moves and tilts his head and body#and then there's the use of tone and inflection; the way Dunk DELIVERS his lines that communicates what Style is thinking/feeling too#there's SO MUCH going on in every single scene it makes my brain whirl when I try to parse it#and tbh I already noticed Dunk doing this in SIMM - esp in regard to using his VOICE to convey emotions the way#Dao had a lot of hurt and anger that would bleed through in crucial moments and Dunk was already very good at that#but I'm really loving how much of that is evident because Style is a much more expressive character with very high energy/intensity#and it allows Dunk to really flex and show that skill off <3#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#style sattawat#fadel#fadelstyle#dunk natachai#joong archen#joongdunk#thk meta#style meta#hui talks thk#hui talks thai bl#thk ep 2
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sorry but your boyfriend found out he’s fictional. yeah he got upset. he’s feeling inscrutable emotions.
#*yjh voice* can't believe he was only interested in my textposts. hurt. betrayed even.#also lmao kdj’s still carrying him around#orv
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SMTIV English Artbook Scans
Today, I was able to finish scanning my entire English SMTIV art book! This book is weirdly hard to find so I'm glad I was able to do this, and I hope that everyone enjoys being able to read the official translation of this incredible art book!
#smtiv#smt iv#shin megami tensei iv#smt4#smt#shin megami tensei#senshi voice 'TIS FINISHED#takes a deep bow and then falls over because my back hurts from crouching over my scanner for like 3 hours today#anyways theres so much cool stuff in here in terms of commentary like there is so much text in here#comments on like every single thing#also this entire like 2.5 page interview with masayuki doi and eiji ishida#also peep the little goddess of tokyo easter egg on the very first and last pages#im already a serial tag yapper but i just want to say that i really really hope that you guys get something out of this because it makes me#very happy to think that someone might get to learn something new or cool or interesting from these that is my one and only wish#also bc that took me a really long time and my printer lives on the floor. ow. my bones#myscans
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it's so funny when someone is complaining about himiko, a queer character, being used as a tool for getting a straight couple together and then someone shows up like "ugh bkdks and tgchks are so bitter and delusional and don't understand this scene at all"
like no, that's not it.
i very much understand that himiko is a character who above anything else valued living and loving freely and that the chapter was trying to make the point that because himiko loved ochako she wants her to stop denying herself love and happiness! i get that!
but the thing is... himiko is a character inherently associated with queerness. the way that she was told that there was something wrong with her simply for being the way she was, that she should be normal, her way of loving being seen as twisted, the quirk counseling—it's all a metaphor.
so you can't just say that the people rightfully calling out the story for having himiko's queer love (literally!) push a straight couple together are wrong and distorting the meaning of the scene because Well. context matters.
so, no, tgchks and bkdks aren't "whining because our ships weren't endgame" (most of us never actually believed they would; when it comes to shipping i think a lot of us would agree that the important part isn't whether or not a ship becomes canon, we just want to enjoy the characters and dynamics we love), we're upset for several reasons, one of which being the mistreatment of a canonical queer character.
#sorry just had to get this out of my system#i have so much love for himiko and this chapter made me so hurt and angry sigh#ANYWAYS this was just a rushed rant at 4:50am so do forgive me if it doesn't make a Lot of sense pwease#bnha#bnha manga spoilers#toga himiko#himiko toga#togachako#togachaco#bkdk#bakudeku#<- not really but fuck it high school musical voice we're all in this together#oh ohh also i'm pretty sure there are posts out there that explain this better AGAIN THIS IS JUST A POORLY WRITTEN RANT
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You know what, I figured out why we're having so many errors in Destiny 2 now. It's because with the addition of Micah-10, we've finally reached a critical mass of women with drop dead gorgeous voices, and the game simply can't handle it anymore. It's like Telesto. Too powerful. If they'd actually put Ikora Rey in a rendered cutscene for more than 5 seconds it would have shut down the servers for good
#destiny 2#destiny the game#destiny spoilers#the final shape#the final shape spoilers#micah 10#ikora rey#eris morn#mara sov#elsie bray#savathûn#we're really quite spoiled for women with amazing voices#you know what we're Not spoiled for?#ikora rey being allowed to be part of the fucking story#look its a fantastic expansion ok.#its just incredibly galling that my least favorite thing is Also happening alongside it.#once again ikora gets shoved out of the limelight in favor of everyone else#gets relegated back to emotional support#is allowed one Tiny outburst of her own hurt feelings only for it to be swept under the rug because there are always Bigger Problems#why didnt we get to hear from ophiuchus?#we got beautiful interactions between every other guardian and their ghost#literally everyone else got a nightmare gauntlet exploring their insecurities and flaws#but no ikora gets to quietly meditate and fail to commune with the traveler#and then cayde gets to contact it instead#all i wanted this expansion was some emotional resolution for ikora#i was so excited after her reunion scene with cayde i was like oh god we're really doing it!#but no. no no.#the sexism of it. the racism of it. the misogynoir#im so tired this has happened in every goddamn fandom ive been in for the past decade#sourghost.jpeg
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so, i usually cant rant about any of my interests at home bc both my parents dont understand or dont care, but today my older sister and her two kids visited and they always have the newest console and games and ... know zelda, even if my sister doesnt play herself she knows stuff and watches others, i dont see her that often and i asked if i could take echoes of wisdom from them when they dont need it just so i can test playing it a little-
anyway, me ranting about totk to them
#ganondoodles talks#personal#when i explained what i dont like about the game they even agreed#can you believe that?? also my sister even said if i made a video i gotta disable comments lol#i almost lost my voice bc i dont talk alot usually so when i talk for a bit i lose it really quickly#felt good though#last day of my vacation time though ...#and of course for the most part of it i felt so shitty i couldnt draw anything#and now that its over i am as motivated as i can be#only stopped by time and my stupid hand hurting so fast (bc of past injury)
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When I was little I thought one of our cats Sockan (translation: the sock) was a tiger. She was more bright orange/red IRL too compared to photos
#she had no voice but rather sounded like that one video of a baby lion barely getting a sound out#she demanded to be fed fish daily every midnight on her throne#(an ugly neon green wool? armchair with strange black pattern from the 70s that we couldnt throw out despite it being broken)#(because again that was sockans throne)#she was also a self identified poor little meow meow#and pretended to be hurt to make my dad feel bad so hed pay special attention to her#while acting just fine when he wasnt looking and around my mom#she was born in the super old firewood stove in the kitchen on my birthday 7 years before me#and she drew her last breath at age 21 wrapped in a blanket in my moms lap#out in the garden on the porch swing on a beautiful sunny day#so my mom was right there with her for both her first and last day#the grey cat seen vaguely to the right was her dad bamse#but he deserves his own post.#silvi talks
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If i ever stop thinking of ‘when i saw you fumbling, teetering, when i saw your desperate desire to be loved crushing you— what did i do? what did i do, charles?’ please for the love of everything assume ive died because wht the fuck.
#snap chats#forcing myself to stop playing marvel rivals to accomodate cherik time into my schedule !!!!#also the quotes from Resurrection of Magneto issue 2. the famous page yk the one#no one even knows how obsessed i am with that whole issue honestly…..#like how erik immediately stops fighting the moment ororo mentions charles and how he enters a blinding fury of rage and guilt afterwards#im afraid no ones doing it like him i swear i can so clearly hear the anguish in his voice and feel the agony in his heart it hurts#it hurts and im gonna be SICK#charles’ desperate desire to be loved …………….. why the fuck would you say that …… im gonna sob ……..#ouuugggghhh that reminds me of a fic i have bookmarked ….. i should go eead it i havent yet i just know i was interested …#i love angsty cherik so much its so good for my soul i HAVE to puke
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