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#also missing him being a dork
danielsmithshairmx · 1 year
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My broken Dan series is still alive!!! 😂😂😂
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sf9 · 1 year
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goodbye (for now) idol!Rowoon you'll always be part of sepgu and SF9 will always be 9 💖 thinking about how Rowoon's acting career helped bring new Fantasies to the world and how SF9 grew thanks to all the members in their own way - actor!Rowoon you are famous but idol!Rowoon will always have a special place in my heart :(
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youchangedmedestiel · 6 months
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You know you have those expressions like beautiful idiot or sexy motherfucker, well Misha is a hot dork (affectionate).
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un-pearable · 2 years
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and here's lloyd's lines. i love him dearly
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gildedmuse · 1 year
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As horrible as it is my main thought during this scene was just, God...
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I can't believe Law missed all this.
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[I did love them getting weaker as the physical representation of just SAYING NIN burned away, as if it is honestly centeral to ninja magic. It's so over dramatic and meaningful and utterly ridiculous and freaking dark as hell the more you think about it... Oh my god.... You guys, this is just Law turned into a ninja scene.....]
The boy only has like two areas of his life where you can still see traces of the innocent joy of childhood: Sora and Ninjas. Now, two of them are facing off by trying to out badass pose one another, ninjutsu vs ninjutsu. But Raizo stood his place and watched as a man he'd once worked beside burned, burned, burned until the pain was too great and he wanted the fire to take him.
Law would have LOVED it.
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Aaaaand the maniacal magic of childhood is over.
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Nope, they're all with Mugiwara-ya, he doesn't know any of these idiots. He only even showed up to stab an old lady through the chest, okay!?
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blood-orange-juice · 1 year
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(volume 1568 of Rinn yet again being unhappy with FFXIV. it's a form of love too, I swear)
What captivated me about the Exarch was how he was still very much G'raha. How you meet him in a different world, under a different name, with no hope for any heroic legacy anymore, with the worst impostor syndrome there ever was. A glorified technician of someone else's miracle instead of a hero. And how it's still him. The same theatrical gestures, the same unyielding stubborness.
And it's so clear how he got there from his past bratty self. Any sufficiently huge project would do that to a person, especially one who dreams of greatness. (and he is in fact a hero, in more ways than he could have ever thought of, he just doesn't realise it)
And, strangely, the post-5.3 G'raha doesn't feel like either of them. I know he's supposed to be an amalgam of both, I know how he talks about not knowing who he is anymore, I know he occasionally "does an Exarch". I still don't recognize him. I don't want him to occasionally do an Exarch. I want him to shift roles and personalities and worlds, become someone completely different because that's what the circumstances demand, and still be unmistakably himself. Personality is but a tool after all.
(besides, whatever he does now is not the Exarch, it's a Mary Sue. The Exarch's thing has always been doing uniquely badass things while looking unbelievably pathetic and failing at least for the first five times, usually more)
Maybe I would have preferred young G'raha to walk around with a usb stick of his older self instead of them merging. Let him possess Allagan machines, he has enough style to pull off a Ghost in the Shell scenario. Maybe I would have preferred his soul to possess a clone. Two G'rahas are better than one. I imagine they would have enjoyed it. He is insane enough to do something like that.
But oh well. What's done is done. I'm hoping for a Meracydia expansion because maybe he'll have story relevance and a role to rise up to it again.
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i-wakeupstrange · 1 year
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read someone on the internet saying they didn't want to watch utena because of the mamousa breakup in sailor moon r
and i had to physically restrain myself from ranting
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distractionpie · 1 year
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Ballister in the opening scenes is so wound tight and so restrained, he puts up with Todd getting all in his space and is the one to hold Ambrosius back and just radiates control and holding himself up to outside standards. even his affection towards Ambrosius is small touches and Ambrosius coaxing him to open up.
and by the midpoint he's just loosened up so much even in the midst of a fight there's a relaxed confidence about him that he just didn't have before that I think comes partly from Nimona's influence and partly from the fact that he's already lost everything he was trying to hold onto with his control and he's already tried the controlled way of getting it back and that didn't work so he's letting himself go back to his core from being a kid that gatecrashed guard training to fight for what he wanted
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and it just makes me think about Ambrosius, who is such an exuberant dork when it's just the two of them and prods at Ballister for being mopey/thinky, but who also definitely has some degree of understanding public/private face seeing how he is with the other knights and in the market scene but he's overall a lot freer with his actions.
After everything, will Ambroius look at the person Ballister is now and the person he was when they were together as knight-candidates, and have to think about how maybe that was the happiest Ballister could be under those circumstances but if they'd been knighted and got that conventional happily ever after, even when it was just the two of them and Ambrosius could drop the weight of public expectations, Ballister probably never would have been as confidently joyful as he has the potential to be and Ambrosius would never even have known what they were missing because Ballister had been holding himself in for so long that everybody (including probably Ballister himself) just assumed that restrained was part of his personality.
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tubbytarchia · 8 months
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Etho doodles in which I let my inner dinosaur nerd take over 😔 and also have no idea how to shade
Get it cause he's old and washed up haha... ok but actual raptor Etho hybrid justification below cut
To be honest the main reason was because I really wanted a hybrid in the mix who wasn't some furry creature and a reptile or amphibian or smth instead. Etho still ended up feathered but whatever it's close enough! But for ACTUAL reasoning:
He does feel damn ancient, like an old deity of the mcyt space that no one can dislike. Dinosaurs are the same!! They're old but still thought of with great fascination and fondness, everyone loves dinosaurs...
Dinosaurs are ever so mysterious, as many advancements as we make there's still so much we don't know. Just as we know jackshit about mister Kakashi skin man. Also, there are so many incomplete skeletons out there. I didn't have a particular species in mind for Etho, because where's the mystery in that? He can be one of those 5% skeleton 95% speculation dinosaurs like this guy!! Missing jaw and all
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"I'm a runner, not a protector" - so, a raptor, or more specifically the Dromaeosauridae family, which literally has "running/runner" in its name
But! I'm always a fan of stuff going against its nature, especially in this case! Etho states he's not a runner yet protects his allies rather fiercely even in total silence. Eg refusing to kill Cleo in SL or to give away Tango's location during the LimL manhunt, same for Grian in SL. He was a bit flaky in 3L I think? And he only started to have genuine care for allies in LL with Bdubs? Though he is still very much a runner in many cases like during the LL Wither fight. Research also strongly suggests that most if not all raptors were solitary hunters, and the way I see Etho (through my shamefully limited watchtime of his POVs...) he feels a lot like someone who ultimately only trusts himself at the start even if he's pleasant and allying with others, and doesn't seem to think he can carry his weight in groups though he doesn't voice this a lot. That's just how Etho is, very composed, but it feels like there's an insecurity there, showcased especially in SL but again I haven't seen almost any of his POVs in full so maybe I'm talking out of my ass!! Sorry ethogirls I'm only a sidegig ethogirl myself... But yeah tldr to me he gives off the vibe of an otherwise solitary animal struggling to find 100% sure footing in a pack. In whichever ways he does go against his nature, its not usually made a show of
At the mention of a raptor, a lot of people will probably think of the glamourized Jurassic Park Velociraptors. But those awesome guys from the movies are actually the size of chickens. In general though, dinosaurs tend to be a bit.. exaggerated in media, despite how inherently fascinating they already are. And I think it fits Etho because we all know how the Lifers seem to fear and mancrush on him when he's just some dork with perfect capability to become pathetic at a moment's notice. Still, he's a clearly skilled player and still respected without question Etho's not some killer machine like some people make dinosaurs out to be. He's just a fellow creature fulfilling his role in the ecosystem 👍
dinosaurs are cool
The hook-like sickle claws on the feet... something something fishing rod
I swear I'm not turning all my Lifers into hybrids I'm not!! Still plenty normal humans in the mix I swear....... But Etho is such a radical dude, I really wanted to do something more for him. The whole Kitsune thing that I often see associated with him is really cool. I don't actually know the reasoning for it but I assume something something naruto, but also, him being this ancient mythical cryptid who people know so little about, you know? It makes SO much sense. So anyway I turned him into a dinosaur instead rawr
As a herbivore advocate I also considered stuff like the triceratops (known for how they protect themselves and their own) but nah the raptor symbolism...
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be-good-to-bugs · 2 years
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:D
#the bin#my kitties are here!!! i missed them SO MUCH#theres 4 of them here but trubbish will be going to a shelter p much immediately. she would already have gone but there were none accepting#cats back there so she will go to one here#scooter might be going too but we are looking to see if anyone we know will take him. i love him so dearly with all my heart and i wanna#keep him but we just cant keep that many and omen and asbestos are more important to me#the other 2 (including coffee) are gonna go to my mom and siblings. we at least only have to let go of 2. scooter is gonna hurt to say bye#hes so sweet and precious and i love him. he likes to be held like a baby and to claw your chest and stick his nose in your mouth whenever#you speak. his nickname is scgoober bc he is such a little dork baby. such a bastard. i love him so much. i remember when i found him#but i just cant ket go of my other ones either. im so bappy to see asbestos again. i missed him so much#im happy to see omen too#i should post some pictures of them. omen us bigger than she was when i left. her belly is also still shaped funny. i think its permanent#she got a real bad infection after getting fixed and her belly got all drooped down and she is healthy now but her belly is still shaped#kinda weird. her and asbestos bith have weird misshapen body parts. his tail is so silly. whenever he tries to move it the way other cats#do it looks like he is waggging it bc it doesnt move quite right. i should take a video bc its adorable. he is trying so hard to do that#thing where they do a slither motion with their tails but his tail is broken and short and it just doesnt work. its adorable#sorry i know theres a lot of words here. i tried keeping it concise but this IS me being consice#i could talk abt my kitties for hours. especially bc ive missed them and now they are here! i wanna see bibben and coffee too but alas i#cannot anytime soon. im sad that im naver gonna see my dog again. i wish i couldve said bye more. he is such a good dog#ive never been fond of literally any dogs except him. i was his fav person but he loved everyone a lot. he is so sweet and good. i miss him#its not as hard to let go of him as it is to let go of scooter though. i cared for baby kitten him and he was so tiny and so sweet#now he is a bastard man and would never let anybody do what he used to but he is still so affectionate. if you sit on the couch he likes to#come and headbut you right in the face. this is the cat who broke my nose#hhh. i really dont know if ill be able to say bye to him. the fact he broke my nose kinda makes me love him more cause its funny it happene
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lowkeyrobin · 1 month
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UMBRELLA! BEN ; a million timelines
summary ; you'll always end up with one certain face in every universe and timeline
warnings ; language
disclaimers ; ben isn't dead, umbrella! ben in fact bc I love that dork sm, viktor is already transitioned the whole way through, random word vomit
track ; not a lot, just forever, adrianne lenker
word count ; 1.1k
masterlist
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It seemed in every timeline, you'd be semy straight back to Ben's side.
You were intertwined, sewn together, in fact.
In 2019, you were reunited with him after Sir Reginald Hargreeves' death. You hadn't seen each other since you were kids, it'd been years.
You didn't have any special powers like the Hargreeves' did, you were just their normal friend who lived next door above the laundromat. You came back to town for other reasons, but when you heard the news, you had to go see them.
Your eyes first landed on Viktor, his short hair completely different from his old, long, luscious locks. You immediately smiled, wrapping him in a solemn hug, congratulating him yet showing remorse and compassion over his dad's timely demise.
You went through the rest of the siblings, other than Five, as he'd gone missing all those years ago.
Then up came Ben.
You could feel the soft look on his face as he looked at you, finally being reunited after all this time. He was by far your favorite of the academy, holding a special spot in your heart.
It wasn't just that his cool tentacle shit that drew you to him. He was a total dork, and you adored it. He always found a way to make you smile, he noticed the smallest of things, he was so sweet and compassionate. He could light up a room like a flashlight in the dark.
He wrapped you in a hug, spinning you around in joy.
"Oh my God, Y/n!"
"Ben!"
Your smiles were unmatched, the other siblings watching with little smiles, nostalgia crashing against their mental shores. They loved you too, but they also loved seeing their two favorite people together again.
"God, why are you here?"
"Came back for some stuff, but also for you guys. Sorry about your dad"
"It was coming-"
"He was murdered"
"Luther!"
You softly chuckle, hiding your face in his shoulder, enjoying the sweet dopamine rush infecting your brain.
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You were stuck to Ben by the hip, almost literally, as you landed on cold, wet concrete on April 28th, 1960. You share a panicked look, calling for any of the other Hargreeves' before eventually giving in to failure.
At least you still had each other.
You spent the next three years thinking the others were dead and that you were permanently trapped in the sixties. You worked in a bar, and he worked right beside you. You both didn't understand that without degrees, you were hired, but it was much better than nothing.
Then you were reunited with Klaus, then Five, then the others.
But of course, some weird fuck up in the space time continuum forced the world to attempt to kill itself, again.
And once again, you stood behind Ben as he unleashed the tentacles from his internal organs to protect you and his family.
Good God, what did you do to get wrapped up in all this?
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That lead you all astray again back in 2019, thankfully, but some other superpowered people had taken the Umbrella Academy's place. The Sparrow Academy.
But once again, you were right by Ben's side.
You were at his side during the first Kugelblitz, travelling with Five and Klaus to meet Klaus' already deceased mom, and at the end-of-the-world wedding between Luther and Sloane.
You now sit at the bar at the Hotel Obisidian, sipping on mocktails as you watch Luther and Sloane break it down on the dance floor. A tune calls your name, screaming for you and Ben to jump out there.
Just Like Heaven by The Cure.
"Oh my God, we loved The Cure when we were little!" You giggle, only a buzz directing the slight slur in your words.
Ben smiles, "We did"
"Come on" You quickly set your glass down on the counter, looking over at Ben, who hasn't moved, giving you a raised eyebrow. "C'mon, Ben"
He looks over at Five who rolls his eyes, sipping on some sort of champagne. Ben gives into your pleads, setting his glass down to go with you.
You join Luther and Sloane, and Klaus and Viktor, on the dance floor, allowing the song to consume you inside out. You jump about, singing along to the lyrics as you hold each other's hands.
Colorful lights splash upon your faces, blinding you for milliseconds as they pass you by.
Five, now accompanied by Diego and Lila, watches you two from afar. He lightly smiles, enjoying the smiles on your faces as you await to be disintegrated into dust as the world crumbles around you.
"Even in every jump across the space time continuum and in every alternate timeline that will somehow find a way to end, they're always at the end together" Five observes, glancing over at the couple, elbows rested against the bar behind him.
Lila gives him a cringed look, not understanding a word of the gibberish he'd just spoken. Diego sighs and shakes his head, taking a bite out of a bologna sandwich he made for himself.
"It's cute," Five clarifies.
"Why don't you get out there?" Diego asks Five, "The world is about to end. Enjoy it, Ebenezer Scrooge McDuck"
Five chuckles. "Yeah, let me go enjoy the world fading into dust at every touch." He sets his glass down on the bar, deciding to go join the enthusiastic group of mentally dead Hargreeves' plus you.
You and Ben, even as the song switches, continue to dance together, creating a little circle with Klaus and Viktor so Sloane and Luther could have their little alone time. Eventually, the whole family is on the dance floor, enjoying their final hours on Earth.
After a while, you crash on the floor beneath the couch, mindlessly listening to Luther, Five, Diego, Klaus, and Viktor drunkenly sing along to Seal's Kiss From A Rose. Allison, Sloane, and Lila enjoy the show, singing along from the couch.
Five, noticing you two were slumped over, half dead, calls out to you. "Hey, lovebirds! Get up here!"
You and Ben immediately look down toward each other, your feet touching one another's, giggling like little kids as you realize what Five had called you. You crawl up to your hands and knees, then rise to your feet, joining the brothers up on the little karaoke stage.
"Now that your rose is in bloom, a light hits the gloom on the grey!"
It was true, in the end of each timeline, in each version of the world ending, you and Ben would end up side by side. Nothing, not even theories and paradoxes, and jumps across the fabric of the universe could separate you.
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entertaining-two · 3 months
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Upon yet another re watch, episode one really is wild because I feel like we all forgot how much of a little romantic dork Colin was for the first two seasons. Like this man was still the younger brother of his two older brothers, he was seen as immature, kiddish, and too young to really be a man.
His whole journey season 1 is setting up how he wants a romantic connection but is deceived for his naivety in this situation despite warning.
His journey season 2 is to try and become a man, having traveled, trying to gain purpose and prospects through investing and being a protector to the feathering tons he feels noble. Yet he still wonders what the point of it all is: ie, he’s missing the heart of his purpose which is to love someone undyingly.
Season 3 everyone is so shocked when he shows up, looking older, looking and acting confidence and suave and flirtatious something he NEVER was before. They are shocked and also not mocking him for his travels and he knows now not to even divulge his passion for it because he knows while his family loves him, they do not truly care for the inner workings of his mind. Leaving him still missing something. That something is a true partner.
I just feel like we all really truly forgot how Colin was never the one to be smooth, the one to know the exact thing to say and when, or even the confident hot one. The man spent hours talking about plants he saw traveling to his ex’s husband for gods sake like this man is not suave he is dorky and adorable. He had always been dorky younger brother of the two catches in the Bridgerton house. Forgotten amongst the diamond of the season, the viscount, and the flirtatious artist. Who was he? He had no clue.
He wandered and came back a new person hoping people would now accept him and clearly he feels it has worked because everyone praises him for it! So when his facade starts to crumble around Pen, and when she throws back at him that he has put on this mask of a person, and tells him she just wants the true man she loves, for once Colin is feeling seen for who he actually is. I think that is why he kisses her so aggressively after the “I love you!” Statement by the modiste. He’s seen, and loved. Now he just had to figure out how to accept the lady Whistledown stuff.
All I’m saying is people don’t get Colin and I will die on the hill that he deserves more praise. He’s far more complex than people give credit and I love his character.
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alvojake · 3 months
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Rain Drops | N.RK
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「pairing」 : bf!riki x fem!reader 「word count」 : 1.2k
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「synopsis」 : it was a tiring day and nothing seemed to be going right, but riki was there to help make you feel better.
「genre」 : fluff, comfort
「warnings」 : riki helps reader change, mentions of mental exhaustion, riki is a gentleman and a sweetheart, petnames (dummy, weirdo, dork, love...), just a bunch of fluffiness, lmk if I missed anything!
「notes」 : this is something I whipped together for two specific Riki stans that I know could probably use this right about now, @rikstar & @emi-en. I hope you guys enjoy this, and I love you guys 🖤🫂 this is also my first official Riki fic that I'm posting on my blog, so I hope you guys like it!!
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It had been an extremely long day. Your brain didn't seem to want to work, and you had completely forgotten about a huge assignment that was due. This resulted in you begging your teacher to give you a few more days. Thankfully, she was understanding and gave you until the end of next week. 
Then, when you thought things were starting to get a bit better, it started to rain outside, and you didn't have an umbrella. You stood by the window in the hallway, the noise of other students bustling about heard in the background, but you just watched as the rain poured outside. 
You had debated calling your boyfriend, Riki, but you were sure he was busy, and you didn't want to bother him. 
Sucking it up, you just decided to just try to make it home before you got too soaked. Sighing, you lifted your bag further up your shoulders before making your way to the entrance of the school. 
You stood at the bottom step and watched all the students around you walk off campus with an umbrella or share one with one another. You didn't really have friends that you could do that with, so you had no choice but to just walk in the rain and hope you wouldn't get sick. 
With a sigh, you go to take the last step, but before you get too far, you feel a tug on your backpack, pulling you back a bit. A small squeak of surprise falls from your lips, and you are about to turn and tell the person off before you hear his voice. 
“What are you doing, dummy?” Riki stood behind you, an umbrella in his left hand. You looked up at him with shocked eyes. 
What was he doing here? You were sure you hadn't called or messaged him. Seeing the confusion on your face, he rolled his eyes, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.
“I knew that you would forget it was supposed to rain today, so…” he said, opening the umbrella with a flourish. "I decided I would meet you here to walk you back to the dorms.” He smiled cheekily as he held the umbrella over the two of you.
You couldn't help the tears that had started to pool in your eyes. It had been a really long day, and being reminded how attentive your boyfriend was was a huge relief. Seeing the tears on your waterline, Riki internally panicked for a moment.
He reached over and took your hand in his, intertwining your fingers together. You bit your bottom lip as you watched him bring it to his lips to place a soft kiss on your knuckles. 
“Don't cry; it's okay.” He offered you a small smile before tugging you towards the school's gates. You sniffled slightly and clung onto his arm, watching as the rain fell around you. 
Riki squeezed your hand reassuringly, peeking down at you every so often to make sure that you were okay. 
~
When the two of you made it back to your dorm building, Riki shook most of the water droplets off of the umbrella as you unlocked the door. pushing it open, you walked in, letting Riki follow after you. 
“I'm so exhausted,” you grumbled as you walked over to the bed and face-planted into the soft mattress. 
Riki chuckled as he slid his shoes off of his feet after putting the umbrella away. He then walked over to you, grabbing your ankle softly to untie your shoelaces. 
You were far too tired to care what he was doing, wanting nothing more than to just sleep after the day that you've had. 
Riki slipped both of your shoes off your feet and placed them next to his at the door. Once he turned, he noticed that you were already dozing off. 
“You can't fall asleep yet, weirdo; you still have your bag on.” he poked your thigh as he stood over you, but you just grumbled for him to leave you alone. Shaking his head, he leaned down to pull your body up until you were sitting up. 
“Riki…” you whined as you looked up at him with a pout, hands falling in your lap after he tugged your bag off.
“Come on, let's get you changed, and we can lay down.” he offered you a smile, trying not to coo about how cute you were as your bottom lip was jutted out, and your eyes were droopy. 
Sighing, you took his outstretched hand, allowing him to pull you to your feet. He cupped your face in his palms, tilting your head up before placing a soft kiss on your forehead. 
You couldn't help but smile softly as warmth spread throughout your body from his touch. His hands reached out to grab the hem of his shirt, balling the material in your hands.
“Did you want your normal oversized tee and shorts combo?” Riki asked, pulling away from you to walk over to your dresser. You nodded, trying your best not to flop back down onto the bed. 
Riki opened the drawer that held all of your sleep shorts and oversized tees, grabbing one of each before turning back towards you. 
He laid the clothes on the bed before turning back to you, taking in your confused expression.
“What are you-” you started to ask as he grabbed the hem of your shirt, tugging it over your head. Heat bloomed across your cheeks as you were left standing topless in front of him.
“You can hardly keep your eyes open; you'll be lucky to put your shirt on the right if I let you.” he chuckled, reaching over to grab your night shirt and unfolding it before pulling it over your head. 
You stuck your arms through the arm holes before letting him pull the fabric down your body. Your eyes stayed glued to your boyfriend's form as he helped out of your pants. Grabbing your shorts, he helped you step through the leg holes before letting you pull them up your hips while he threw your dirty clothes in the laundry hamper. 
Turning back towards you, he patted down some of the stray hairs on your head, a look of adoration playing on his features. 
“Are you up to eating something, or did you just want to sleep?” he asked, watching as you yawned, sitting on the edge of the bed.
“I really just wanna sleep, but you wanna-”
“No, we can eat later. Come on.” He shook his head before climbing onto your bed, tugging the covers back so he could get underneath them. Looking back at you, he motioned for you to join him. "Come on, dork.” He chuckled as he watched you grumble, crawling to him before just flopping down on top of him.
Riki let the covers fall over both of you as you snuggled into his chest, letting your body relax for once the entire day. Sighing contently, you let your eyes flutter closed as you inhaled his comforting scent. 
Humming softly, Riki ran his fingers through your hair, watching as your breaths started to even out. His heartbeat lulled you to sleep. 
“I'm sorry you had a rough day, love,” he whispered, placing a kiss on the top of your head before situating himself, closing his eyes, and joining you in slumberland.
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@alvojake | Do not steal, plagiarise, translate, or repost any of my work
𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖈𝖑𝖆𝖎𝖒𝖊𝖗 : ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ɴᴏ ᴡᴀʏ ᴀ ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʀᴇᴘʀᴇꜱᴇɴᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏꜰ ᴀɴʏ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀꜱ. ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴘᴜʀᴇʟʏ ꜰɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴛᴀᴋᴇɴ ꜱᴇʀɪᴏᴜꜱʟʏ.
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savanir · 3 months
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DP x DC ficlet
is it even a ficlet anymore, this thing has gotten incredibly out of hand...
So a while back I saw this
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and I picked the Green Lantern one and then just kinda wrote a full fic so...
It had been a good party, official yes but despite that still festive enough and with just a bittersweet hint. as all good meaningful parties should be like, unless you’re looking to get absolutely shitfaced.
But hey Rowan deserved a proper sendoff for making it to this point and not dying in the process. Hal is going to miss the old pilot though.
"Hal, I got something for you, before I forget"
"Hm, what is it"
The old man puts a small intricate glass model of a f16 fighter in his hand.
"Back when I started I was given this for good luck and protection"
Rowan presses it down firmly and stands there all official like "may it grant you both as it did for me"
They both stand there for a second before laughing.
“Feel free to shelf the whole luck thing, what’s really important is skill and experience. Still, knowing you, you can definitely use the protection ”
Hal grins, "Thanks, I'll keep close"
"You better, the sentimental value is sky high" Rowan slaps his shoulder with another laugh.
Good lord what a dork.
The old retiring pilot wasn't paying attention, too caught up in everything else but Hal saw the faint and brief green hue coming from his hand.
In a panic he slammed his other hand over top. Completely missing the quietly whispered "protect"
Too busy cussing out his ring in his head, he swears that thing is trying to out him on purpose sometimes.
This time it wasn't the ring though, so it's a good thing it's an inanimate object and can't be upset at how wrong Hal is being right now.
"Everything alright?"
"Yeah! Let's get back to the others"
The evening ends uneventfully.
---
It's really only until quite a bit later that things start to happen.
"Green lantern" its batman's business voice.
Both Hal and John look up.
"Jordan" ah shit.
"I'll catch you up later" and he leaves Hal behind, traitor.
"What's up spooky"
"You need to update your file, it is missing critical information, and on that note I wasn’t aware that the lantern suits grant you intangibility now"
"I... what..? It doesn't? What are you talking about spooks"
"Hrn" Batman pulls up a screen and shows him footage of the latest fight, in it you can clearly see something was supposed to hit Hal but went right through him "You're telling me you didn't know or notice this?"
Hal just looks kinda sick. That would have been a bad hit and he just straight up didn't even notice.
Batman just kind of silently looks at him and he must have come to some conclusion because the next thing Hal knows this comes out of his mouth.
"I've already ran your blood through the lab, it's not a sudden emergence of a meta gene so it's either from the lantern corps or you've otherwise externally been affected by something that's causing this"
Hal closes his eyes and internally counts to ten, it doesn't help.
Batman takes his silence to mean he can keep talking. The man is on an unusual roll. Hal would have been ecstatic if he didn't hate the topic quite so much.
"It would have been best if it had something to do with your ring however you seem to be completely unaware and I've also noted that the green of your ring and the green glow that comes with the density shifting are different"
He has examples with corresponding color codes, Hal is so tired.
“let's set a time frame…” Batman pulls up some documents and graph on the screen “seeing as you are unaware of this development I will set the starting point of this potential change as of now to right after the last time you have been known to be hit in a fight and before the first known instance of you being able to density shift, that leaves us with a full month.”
Hal really, really does not want to be here anymore.
“In this month you have not gone off planet so whatever caused this is on Earth” Batman pauses for a moment, “has anything significant happened during that time that springs to mind now?”
“no, nothing significant has happened during that time, frankly it’s been a very pleasant uneventful four weeks in which I finally managed to catch a break and it figures something crazy has apparently happened anyway”
Hal rubs his face with both hands, “but right now I couldn’t tell you what, anyway, does this have to be a bad thing? I for one am very glad that hit didn’t actually land”
“So far only Superman has had the privilege of having sudden emergence of new powers work out for him” Batman huffs, “it would be best to monitor this carefully, if anything springs to mind do not hesitate to inform me, the sooner this is figured out the better”
“awww you do care” Hal is using humor cope, sadly it’s Batman, so it’s not very effective.
“Jordan” now Batman sounds tired, he’s not the one with random surprise density shifting, Hal understand that Spooky’s crippling chronic paranoia must be exhausting but right now he’s the one freaking out considering this is apparently not a meta gene related development, it would have been so much easier if it was, oh and about that, just how and when did Batman get his blood exactly? he would like to know now.
---
sadly he does not get to know now. or anytime soon (or ever). it’s chaos right after, because of course it is.
knocked out of the sky and lying amongst the rubble, if their enemy spots him he’s in bigger shit than he already is, but he can’t fucking move and the next thing he knows he’s invisible.
and there is just nothing enjoyable about it.
Barry doesn’t know that though, “that was something else, just one moment and schwup and you were just gone, some sort of green lantern light bending? he looked right through you, thank god he did too” 
shit shit, “no that was..." it was like he just ceased to exist, movies and books and whatever other media always depicts it as such a cool thing but frankly it was terrifying. And he would prefer things that are terrifying not to happen to him, for obvious reasons, “honestly actually it’s complicated, stealth tech” Grade A bullshit.
“well it’s awesome”
“it was useful just now but not really my style you know” 
Barry slings his arm over Hal’s shoulder and gives him a one armed hug, “everything worked out” Hal can feel some tension flow out of his friend, “well! better get busy cleaning this mess up” and with a blink he’s gone.
Hal does not want to talk about this with Batman, but knowing him, he probably already knows anyway, it would be less of a headache to go to him than have him go to Hal. 
Hal wants to enjoy whatever this is, he really does, but he doesn’t know what caused this, he doesn’t know what triggers the new abilities or whatever they are, he doesn’t know what effects this shit is going to have in the future, he just doesn’t know anything, normally he doesn’t mind not knowing some things, he’s fine leaving the knowing to the people better suited for the more complicated knowing, but he would very much like to know more about this please.
---
Then they face off against an enemy and in the process Hal drains his ring completely and the next hit is going to be bad, so what will happen? Will he somehow go intangible again? Turn invisible and use the confusion to evade and attack?
No
Apparently this time he just gets a glowing green dome shield. Something very normal for him to have and use, if only it came out of his ring that is.
Nobody notices that something is wrong, nobody besides Batman that is.
"That's three new abilities that only appear during life threatening situations"
Hal has actually seriously gone over that month by now, but nothing, no answers. He's physically fine, mentally a little damaged but nothing new there, they all are. Every test he begrudgingly went through answered nothing. He was fine. Whatever was going on actually had nothing to do with him.
And at the same time it had everything to do with him because this is only happening to him.
As usual (by now) he takes out his little glass fighter jet and runs his thumb over the wings. It is soothing strangely enough. Like a stim toy.
"The last thing to try is a thorough examination by someone from the justice league dark"
Hal groans, magic, ok then, "Alright let's get this over with. Who knows maybe I'm just haunted"
It turns out he’s not haunted, this is a good thing... supposedly, Well let’s just say that Hal would have not minded being haunted or something if that meant it could be fixed, or just explained.
It doesn’t really need to be fixed, whatever this is has been very helpful after all, but he would do basically anything for an explanation right about now.
“you are not haunted or otherwise magically compromised, but I do sense faint traces of energy from the infinite realms” Zatanna is a godsent, finally something to work with.
“from the who whats?” Hal is worried, the occult field is definitely not his area of expertise. He's a space cop, not a space demonhunter… oh that would be pretty cool though, with like a hood and twin cyber crossbows, maybe he should incorporate that somehow.
“the infinite realms… have you recently been in touch with any death related realities?”
Well there was that time when he got booted to the death universe and he died and then he was a black lantern but he got better, that’s all very much very behind him.
She better not be about to tell him that stuff still has lingering consequences.
oh god dammit that’s exactly what is going on isn’t it?
"How recently?"
"In the past week?"
"Oh, no" Hal would have known if that was the case, death stuff tends to be hard to ignore.
Zatanna frowns, that's probably not a good sign.
"But you said I'm not compromised right?" Right now what Hal wants to know the most is if this is changing him. Cause it tends to be bad for him when that's the case.
"No this is just lingering traces of something or someone else using their powers near you"
???!!??!?
"What are the infinite realms?" oh hey there Batman, was wondering when you would show up again.
"It's the afterlife, or... more like a collection of all afterlives. The infinite realms is very literal in their naming. It is home to powerful dead entities. As a general rule magic users are discouraged from interacting with it.
"Hrn"
"What did you say happened to you so far Hal?"
"Uhm, density shifting, invisibility and then a green dome-like shield, a lot like my own energy constructs"
"that sounds like pretty standard stuff for a realms being"
"Soooo what, did one leave the afterlife and decide to follow me around or something?"
"I cannot conclusively say, I can only say that you've been close to one using its abilities"
Batman folds his arms over his chest, "We shouldn’t form theories on these findings alone, Zatanna are these realm beings dangerous?"
"Hard to say, they come in all manner of forms, some small and harmless and others on the level of world destroying gods."
Great great great, awesome, well it’s probably safe to say that whatever decided to stick around Hal isn’t small and harmless, cause small and harmless doesn’t sound strong enough to casually turn him intangible or invisible… he could be wrong though.
“I do advise caution, beings from the infinite realms also have the ability to possess someone, they call it overshadowing”
Batman’s lips thin and Hal tenses up, mind control of any kind is always awful.
“I’ll place a ward on you, as a precaution” energy starts to gather in her hands.
Batman moves for the door, “we might need to look into a way to force this being to reveal itself, it would be best if we could convince it to return to their realm”
“Well I mean-” Hal starts, “like I get that, but they have been a great help so far” 
“they are a security risk”
“I’m just saying, I am grateful that they kept me from being confined to the medical wing for who even knows how long, who knows they might just be shy, wouldn’t it be better to convince them to become our ally, like Deadman. instead of telling them to leave. just cause we don’t understand how they work yet doesn’t mean they are bad and should be booted out of our reality”
Batman narrows his eyes at Hal and turns to Zatanna who is finished with placing the ward on Hal, “Zatanna please send me all you have on the infinite realms, I will do my own research” and with that he sweeps out of the room, very dramatic.
“Ass” Hal whispers under his breath.
“He’s worried”
“well he’s being a dick about it, as usual” Hal’s fingers find his little plane once again “... hey do you think they could communicate through one of those oejah boards?”
Zatanna snorts, “it’s Ouija- and please don’t”
---
No information from the JLD has been useful so far in coaxing the realms being to reveal themselves and for the most part things just go on as usual.
“Whoever they are, they followed me when I went off planet and it might just be my imagination but I had a feeling that their stuff was a lot more… potent? out there? I don’t know it was kinda strange, it just felt stronger”
“but they didn’t reveal themselves to you?”
“nope, they must know that I know now too, so they have decided to just… go on as they always have I guess”
“hrn” Batman is leafing through files, because of this whole mess he’s uncovered hidden government organizations targeting occult entities as well as inhumane laws that stand directly opposed to the meta protection acts.
Why is he working with paper regarding this matter? Well it turns out there is a infinite realms being that can possess electronica and it was only because of the protections the JLD had put in place on the Watchtower that the entity didn’t overtake it in its entirety.
Watching Constantine freak out had been mildly entertaining but Zatanna had once again reminded Batman to be very careful, Batman had begrudgingly admitted he had made a slight misstep while digging for answers… in his head, not out loud, god forbid.
“this whole thing is turning out a lot bigger than we thought huh, good thing we are dealing with it now” Hal stretches his arms above his head, “anyway I am going to go grab something to eat”
“the rapport-” Batman doesn’t bother looking at him.
“yeah yeah” Hal doesn’t either while walking out of the room, dismissively flicking his hand, “don’t worry about it spooky”
Hal takes his little plane out on the way to the cafeteria and fiddles with it in his hand, once there he puts it on the table next to Barry before getting himself something to eat.
They catch up, Hal complains (bitches) about Batman, others come and go, Zatanna quickly checks up on the ward she placed which makes Barry raise an eyebrow at Hal, “Ghost protection”
“... no such thing”
Zatanna glares.
Hal can see them both gearing up to start the magic is just science we haven’t fully scienced out yet argument again, “alright! I’m full” he stands up, “if you need me I’ll be writing that rapport, later” and gets the hell out of there.
It’s when he has just reached his preferred spot to work on the boring paperwork stuff when the alarms go off throughout what he can only imagine must probably be the entire Watchtower.
It seems like something triggered all of the JLD’s defenses in one go.
Impressive, but also very worrying.
The rapport is going to have to wait.
People are gathering in the meeting room and Batman is already taking the lead, “status”
“as of a couple minutes ago there was a build up of as of yet unknown energy which then burst in the cafeteria knocking out Flash” Martian Manhunter says, “Zatanna says we are most likely dealing with another being from the infinite realms”
Superman groans, this means he’s out.
It’s a good thing they now have defenses against overshadowing though. Being effectively trapped in a space station (because currently the thing is on lockdown) where literally anyone could suddenly actually be the enemy is the kind of situation a whole slew of horror movies like to be about.
“We will need to be extremely careful while finding and then dealing with this entity”
It has certainly been quite some time since the Watchtower got directly hit like this.
Hal pulls out his little plane.
or, he would, if he still had it.
thoroughly distracted now he suddenly realizes it’s no longer on his person.
Spooky is probably not going to like it if during the infinite realms attacker hunt he takes the opportunity to look around for his missing little fighter jet.
well what he doesn’t know won’t harm him.
His plan of looking for the plane while looking for the ghost is working out well enough.
In fact it is working out so good that he finds both at the same time.
At that point Hal had started wondering if maybe Barry had picked it up for him at the cafeteria before the attack happened and that the little thing was now in the medical wing with him. 
That turned out to clearly not be the case once he found the tiny thing glowing green and floating in the middle of the hallway.
“alright ghosty, that’s really important to me and I would like it back undamaged”
the tiny plane turned to now point directly at him, hmm, yeah that's not creepy at all.
 “... please don’t launch yourself at me” he foolishly says which of course means that’s exactly what it does next.
He uses his ring to construct a net with a pillow inside to catch the tiny jet, completely forgetting that it’s overshadowed and can thus easily just go intangible and right through his creations.
Instead it hits him square in the chest, rather painfully he might add and then just stops glowing and drops, making Hal scramble to not have it fall and shatter in a million tiny pieces on the ground.
immediately all the sensors stop detecting the presence of a realms being and the alarms die down.
Whatever was in the Watchtower has left the building.
or…
Hal looks down at the tiny plane in his hands, his talisman of protection and has a sinking feeling in his gut.
“Hey there little guy, might want to explain yourself?” he says to the tiny jet.
It vibrates in his hands.
“... yeah I figured, shit”
---
“I say just smash the bloody thing and be done with it, preferably that takes care of it once and for all” Constantine glares down at the tiny jet.
Hal is almost halfway over the table to shield the little thing, covering it from Constantine’s sight with his hand, “don’t you dare” he growls.
“it would be best for everyone involved, for all we known you could have gone full liminal what with how long you’ve been carrying the blasted thing around”
Zatanna is going over the little thing with her own magic, “it’s trapped”
“In that case just straight up trying to murder it would be the worst thing to do” Hal glares at Constantine some more. Who clearly doesn’t give a shit, figures, all stressed out about dealing with things from the infinite realms but whenever he feels he has the upper hand he’s more than happy to go full nuclear.
“it would be best if we had a way of figuring out their intentions” Batman looks down at the tiny jet impassively.
“Well, another reason to just carefully release this creature instead” Hal responds.
Zatanna’s magic fades away, “I would say that the fact it’s been protecting Hal for as long as he has it is a positive sign”
“hrn, but now it has gone and knocked Flash out, so what does that say” Batman huffs, “it’s too risky”
“Constantine and I will set up everything we can so it won’t be able to escape or try anything dangerous” Zatanna stops looking at Batman and turns back to the tiny plane, “if it turns out to be malicious we could simply banish it back to the realms, killing it would be rather stupid, we do not know what kind of connections it might have within the realms, we might accidentally anger something far worse with such a rash act”
Constantine groans but accepts Zatanna’s reasoning, Batman nods as well.
It’s only then that Hal moves out of the way.
Any plans of attack or banishment fly right out of the window once the two magic users are done and a young boy manifests from the tiny fighter jet.
Hal pushes Constantine aside to get to the boy’s side.
“Jordan, are you insane! Get back here!” 
“Hey, kid, can you hear me? please open your eyes, slowly, take your time” 
Batman has also moved forward much to Constantine’s frustration. Don't these two morons get that their protections won’t do shit if you just casually stroll into the circle?
Batman is mostly concerned in being able to step in should the boy prove to be a hostile entity anyway, but at the same time… well, that’s a child.
The boy kind of dazedly opens his eyes, looks at Hal and then seems to become aware of his own arms and hands, after opening and closing those a couple times he looks back at Hal and lets out a breath that can only be described as relieved and promptly passes out into him.
Well, Hal figures that settles it then. He doesn’t know shit about looking after a kid, and definitely not one who is probably quite dead, but this one is his, back off Batman.
they all startle rather violently when rings of blinding white light pass over the boy and suddenly the kid in Hal’s arms is a bit warmer and seems to have a sluggish pulse and also his clothes are different and his hair is now black and-
Hal is up and moving towards the medical wing before his mind catches back up with him. He can hear Batman behind him, it seems like Constantine and Zatanna aren’t moving after him as fast.
Well anyway his life is already so goddamn weird, this might as well happen.
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totalswag · 8 months
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pairs love - DREW STARKEY
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authors not since drew is in pairs at the fashion shows i thought why not write something cute and adorable. like can we talk about how freaking good he looked walking around ugh. the poll is officially over and the rafe series won! ima start working on the master list and have it up.
summary you come out to visit your boyfriend in pairs during fashion week.
warnings kissing in front of the Eiffel Tower
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Drew was invited to two fashion shows in Paris: menswear for Prada and Loewe menswear. He left three days ago, while you stayed at home to put the finishing touches on your flower garden.
You couldn't be more proud of your boyfriend with all the success he's gained over the past couple years. He truly deserves this. Getting the recognition he deserves.
Last night, you landed in Pairs, drained from hours on the plane and eager to shower and sleep on a bed. It felt good seeing Drew and being in his arms. Although it was three days without each other, you always miss his presence.
Drew had the day off, so he planned to take you out to dinner, walk around, shopping, and visit the Eiffel Tower. He advised you to get enough rest early so you have enough rest to explore the Pairs at night.
During dinner, Drew spoke about what the shows were like and meeting celebs he's seen in movies or other people for the first time. It was really cool hearing what he had to say.
You were quite excited to visit the Eiffel Tower. You've always wanted to see it in person someday. Your inner child was jumping up and down inside.
"That restaurant was so delicious; I can see why you enjoy it so much," you tell Drew, tucking your hands into your coat to keep them warm from the cold.
"I'm glad to hear that you liked it baby," He smiles, tilts his head to the side, and blushes.
You chuckle as you playfully nudge his arm. He pretends to fall on his side, with a dramatic expression on his face.
"You are such a dork," you laugh.
"Your favorite dork, dork," he responds in a playful tone, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as you continue walking down the sidewalk.
Drew and you went inside a few stores that caught your eye; you might've bought a few things. Drew watched you in awe as you showed him different clothing throughout the store.
"What do you think about this one?" You inquired Drew, holding two clothes that piqued your interest.
Drew hurriedly glances aside from the apparel rack he was browsing. His brows furrow as he casts a stern stare with his pointer finger on his chin.
"I think both will look great on you, but I'd go with this one because it draws your eyes out," he says casually, sweeping his arm toward the shirt you first showed him.
"You are too sweet, you know that" you reply as you turn around, putting back the other clothing item.
He loves seeing you happy. He knew how much you've always wanted to visit Pairs and thought this was the best time to go.
"Thank you for the stuff, baby," you grin, gripping his hand and lifting the bag with your other hand.
When you went out of the last store, you heard people heading in your direction, fans. They walked forward with grins on their faces, carrying items for him to sign and their phones for photos.
When one fan spotted you were with him, she screamed your name out in delight, and the rest followed after. You put your free hand over your heart with a pout before beaming at the little fans.
We love you Drew
This is the best day of my life
I can't believe he's in front of me
He's so beautiful in person
Drew started taking pictures with the fans; giving them hugs, making videos for fans that couldn't make it, signed a few things, and had conversations.
Fans also came up to as well. They were all so sweet and caring. One fan came up to you with tears forming in her eyes, you opened your arms to welcome her.
You are so sweet, Y/N
You are so gorgeous
Can't believe you are here too
I love your relationship with Drew
When word spread that Drew was in a relationship, all of the fans went crazy, searching for who this mystery girl was. You were apprehensive about how the fans might react.
You eventually posted a TikTok video with your best friend, Madelyn Cline, and Drew happened to be in the background; people then connected the dots. In the end, they loved and admired you.
Being in a relationship with someone in the public spotlight offers advantages and disadvantages, but you wouldn't alter it for anything, especially if you love them.
"Don't cry now love," you tell her softly, "what's your name?" She tells you her name and goes on to explain how much she loves you and your content you post.
"That's so sweet of you, thank you."
You spent ten minutes with the girls until it was ready to go look at the Eiffel Tower.
The Eiffel Tower was everything you've dreamed of. Seeing it in person was one of the best feelings in the world. So many emotions were going through your body.
You got out your phone to capture some photos and videos to share later tomorrow. Drew snapped a photo of you with his digital camera, capturing the tower, and he couldn't help but smile.
He carefully put his arms around your waist, drawing you into his front, chin on top of your head, rocking you side to side slowly and silently while savoring the moment.
"This has been one of the greatest days of my entire life. Being here with you in your arms in Pairs. I just want to say thank your for bringing me out here and experiencing this."
You feel your body relax in his touch, allowing a sigh to escape your lips, your head to strike his chest, and giving him the opportunity to kiss you.
You two don't give a damn whether anyone witnesses you kissing at this point. Right now, just the two of you matter because you are in love. And you are in Pairs.
"I had to bring you out here with me, of course, sweetheart. You keep me warm, too, and I love holding you in my arms. However, when you consider it, this is our first trip to Europe as a couple” he says.
You move your body around so that your chests are against one another. In return, you up on your small toes and wrap your arms around his neck, kissing him all over his face.
I love you.
I love you more.
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catastrophicalcat · 3 months
Text
Reasons Valmont Sucks (Catwoman 2018)
Valmont was a terrible character. And I really want to dissect why and how he is terrible - not just to get it off my chest and onto the collective Internet, but also because I think that Howard made some questionable writing choices that doomed him.
A quick intro - Valmont is Selina's love interest from the 1st two arcs of Tini Howard's Catwoman (2018) run. Inspired by some version of the Dangerous Liaisons character, he is a quasi French assassin who appears in Selina's life when she is trying to take on the Five Gotham Crime families, stalks her a bit, gifts her a stolen cat, fucks her, and eventually get murdered by her while he's trying to kill Batman. BatCat are on a poorly defined break during these events (with Bruce clearly thinking that they're somewhat committed to each other). Valmont is a dork. He looks like this:
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More stuff under the break since I don't know how to write succinctly...
Valmont is a possessive stalker. It's obvious that Howard wanted to create a character who is different from Batman. Just look at him - Batman wears black, Valmont wears white. Batman strives to be a good person, while Valmont is an unrepentant murder. Bruce tries to be a gentlemen, while Valmont.... Almost immediately, Howard is in a pickle - how can she recreate a 17th century romance about assholes when, at the moment her run begin, Selina has no reason to be into this guy? And, this phony goth poser, by definition, cannot be upfront and just ask Selina out. Bruce would have done that. He's not Bruce. Solution? She gets rescued by him. A lot. Some examples:
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While getting rescued frequently may be a way to fall in love, it makes Selina just so incompetent. Like I think that almost every single issue where Valmont appears, she needs to gets saved by him in some fashion. I don't think that Bruce rescued her that often, at least not in her own run! I went from reading about a savvy cat-burglar to an eternal damsel-in-distress.
Maybe I missed it, but I literally just read through all of his issues to find these screencaps, and I can't find any reason for him to be there other than to stalk her....
2. Making sexy French man is hard, OK! Prior to this run, I did not realize just how hard it is to write a sexy man instead of a creepy man. But seriously, this guy is GROSS, and Selina being into him makes her come off as dumb floozy. Who in the world would get turned on by lines like:
Maybe I'm fascinating, Catwoman. (Spoiler - he isn't)
I consider myself a citizen of the world. (Is he "my parents live in Ohio, I live in the moment" Ted Mosby?)
I wanted to help. But I did not want to chase you, or do what those boys had done. So I simply waited, where I knew you could find me. ("Those boys" - Tim & Dick, who tried to offer reasonable assistance and advice).
Fascinating? Interesting? Dangerous? (Describing himself.)
But I won't assume that just because a cat has sat in my lap once, it will do so whenever I call. (He then proceeds to bang her on the roof).
Have you ever had anyone encourage you to chase your desires? Just for your own pleasure? (Yeah, this is like a famous trait of hers...)
The sharp pleasure of waiting until I see you again is enough. (See, normal Selina - or a normal woman - would just never see him again).
Related to the above - their sexy times? Not sexy. First, they try and fail to hijack a cannibal's plane and parachute jump. Maybe adrenaline got their heart rate up, but still - poor planning! Second, and more egregiously: multiple characters comment on how Selina is deliriously tired. Valmont is one of those characters! He then bangs her on the roof. I don't want to kink-shame, but sleeping with someone when they're falling off their feet from exhaustion is like, not great?
3. He's a freaking murderer! This guy kills people and drops their bodies in the harbor. He's friends with Flamingo, a cannibal who tried to eat Robin (Damian, but still!). And yet, this is how Selina feels about him:
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What happened? Really, what happened? Selina used to be smart and not boy crazy. Sure, she has a wide variety of unfortunate love interests despite these traits (post forthcoming!). But never has she fallen so fast, so quick, so off the deep end for someone who deserves it so very little.
I have other substantive issues with this run, but wanted to start by dissecting Valmont. A non-Bruce love interest is already an uphill battle in a Catwoman comic. Burdening him with all of these negative traits did not lead to a good story. Instead, Selina came off as stupid and immature for ever liking this guy in the first place.
I know that this post was super negative - these are just my thoughts, and I'm open to critique. If folks feel positive about Valmont, or other things I touched on here, I would be really interested to hear it.
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