#also makes me very happy that someone out there kins a character because to me its like

[maxillo]

oh yeah i found this post once abt your au

oh!!! that's neat

[girlymatsu]

2, 6, 11, 12 and 14 for the self insert lore ask game :3

HIII

2. when in canon does your self insert come in? do you have a scene in mind for your entrance?

SO I imagine Erina to come in in between season 2 and 3.. I was posting about it a few nights ago, in the erina timeline she sees the matsus from the background at the highschool reunion and gets inspired to go hunt them down and calculate befriending them. . But that wouldn’t be her first scene that would be revealed later in the erina arc .. the first scene would be strange coincidences of the matsus seeing erina run into them in strange situations and coincidences, and it’s all recollected by the matsus all talking about their pov of the encounter at chibita until erina actually shows up behind them and being giggly abt how silly they are… im trying to adjust the specifics of her intro so it’s WIP ⚠️ 🚧

6. does your self insert have any pets?

HEHE yes technically @tottychanneru ‘s oc ramirabi is like a pet to her but he is more like a little animal magical creature bff.. he is funny creature… he is her supporter.. her precious friend who phases through the window peacefully when he goes out for the day

And erina also gets a dog later in her and oso’s relationship… based off my own dog Cho Cho <3 I think in the erina verse he would be called Po Po maybe because thats one of my nicknames for him hehe, or Chopi, … and Osomatsu helps get him for her because she was longing for a dog… seeing someone want to give up their little cutie happy dog and erina wanting him so bad but can’t go and meet the owner because she has to work and she’s far away… and Osomatsu surprises her by going on the journey for him… he is a stubborn princely type dog who is very attatched to erina… Osomatsu would get a little competitive with him.. but they ultimately get along because of their love for erina, also they are animals together

11. what kind of outfit(s) does your self insert wear?

Erina is gyaru who kind of experiments with her style, likes agejo a lot but not totally tied down to it, sexy street fashion mixed with a casual cutsey toony flair.. if that makes sense. she loves cutesy patterns and accessories and colors… she usually show tummy and legs , wearing platformers/pumps/chunky shoes rather than too pointy of heels

My friend @/marisivoney on Twitter captures it so well with outfit designs they drew for me for artfight!! Sososooo cuteness

12. how would the fandom view your character?

Omg.. I feel like maybe she’s the icon of a Marina and the diamonds Spotify playlist , widely kinned bpd girl icon.. my friend said she would be menhara girl character u see on Pinterest… I would love to hear what the erinanistas say.. how would the fandom treat her, think what if she was a dangan ronpa character in 2013, tell me your thoughts

14. what hobbies does your self insert have?

Answered!

[crooked-wasteland]

Hazbin Hotel LiveBlog: Scrambled Eggs

So I’m watching Hazbin with my partner who has already seen the entire series. It took us 5 minutes just to get this episode to play from the beginning because it would just skip to episode 4 while the credits where playing before i could pause or rewind. That has nothing to do with the show, it just made me unbelievably enraged, so we ain’t going into this episode happy.

What is with the cat?

It’s been a week since the last episode and every ounce of progress Sir Pentious made last episode is just thrown out as an excuse to introduce yet another character in Carmella. Was there not another way to do this? Like I get Sir Pentious wouldn’t be reformed, but just having him be suddenly paranoid with no reason isn’t founded. Even just a background detail of Angel Dust watching him from a doorway would have been enough to found that suspicion. Especially when Pentious wasn’t shown to be paranoid as a trait. I get this is narrative utilitarianism, but it’s just weak and changing one character’s personality to establish a new one is poor writing.

Sir Pentious to his eggs just feels like fandom

“That’s a lot less hot” That feels out of character

So Trust exercises to tone down the sudden change in Sir Pentious’ character and also to give Vaggie a leading role. Got it. Very utilitarian, very disjointed from the previous episode.

Sidebar, I googled who wrote this episode and it wasn’t Vivienne, however I never would have known because the last episode was equally full of contradictions that it also felt like someone else wrote it. Now maybe that was because Adam had a hand in thing, but The fact I have to google this stuff to know for sure is a joke kin its own right.

I am so conflicted about Niffty. She feels less childlike here and I like find her demented fun, but last episode she was literally written as being child-like so the pain fetish going on is repulsive, despite it not being this writer’s fault. If I want to enjoy anything about this show, I really have to just see every episode as one singular complete entity without calling back on previous ones, however this is a series and thus needs to expand itself through subsequent episodes. To not do so is a failure of concept because this series is very serialized. So in a bubble I really enjoy Niffty. In the series she is a very uncomfortable character to give violent fetishes to and make them so overt. Vivienne ruined that for you all, don’t blame me. Someone should have said how this should have been scrapped before we got this far.

Zestial is suggesting that Alastor may have died at Heaven’s hand. Alastor looks away while laughing. So there is a connection between Heaven and Alastor.

Egg Bois are cute.

Carmella has a bad case of Character Design does not match vocal performance.

Velvette, please never speak again.

Velvette is now 5 inches tall

The yellow blood looks like piss

Can someone tell Lilli Cooper that a lot of British singers don’t have such strong accents when singing. Just please, it’s a great time top drop that bad accent.

James, hi, your singing voice lost the character

The kink shaming be real.

Even Charlie infantalizes Niffty. Geez

This scene in the Turf war was peak Angel Dust. I laughed.

I have to ask, was the music written before or after the singing, because for one, Carmella sounds like she is trying to be heard over it, and second the beat of the music is either lacking or there was an issue with the audio mixing because it just sounds wrong. Like there are melodies and harmonies to a score and one of those is missing. OR, the music is just out of sync entirely with the performer.

Again, just don’t have Vaggie sing. You directed the actor to perform out of her vocal range for her modal voice. Don’t do this to her.

They are not at all harmonized, this is the worst duet I ever heard. Don’t you usually have singers record duets together so they can harmonize their voices? Why didn’t that happen here.

So this big conflict for Vaggie was never a conflict. Best resolution ever.

I like Carmella’s concept. Her character design is kinda trash and the songs were terrible. There was a good idea somewhere in this episode, but from beginning to end every aspect was contrived to just make the story work for the greater plot, the dynamics between the characters be damned. There is a sense of someone wanting to have fun with it while Medrano’s stood behind them with a chokehold on the narrative. It’s disappointing and I feel the writing suffers from Medrano’s obsessive and frantic need for control. This writing feels so insecure and I can only imagine that comes from having a very narrow box to fill.

2/10

I’m taking a break.

[selkieioe]

read: playlists are super down below so keep scrolling!!

Our Life: Beginnings & Always.

Hello Hello! Welcome to my first ever post on tumblr that just had to be about my ultimate top tier favorite visual novel of all time..Our Life: Beginnings & Always or OL:BA for short.

This game has such a special place in my heart that im afraid I’ll forever be attached to it because at this point it’s not even a phase anymore lol. I still remember that heated summer day of scrolling down on my steam shop out of boredom and i kept getting recommended OL:BA but back then i really couldn’t care less and would not even spare a glance on it until i got so fed up of it popping up in my recommended for the next few days that i decided to finally check it out.

Reading what it was about made me curious but what really got me downloading it was because of the customization of our character/characters.

And finally into the game i was! I remember when the story started, i was very surprised already by the environment, narrative and world building of the game. It truly felt like i was part of it and i didn’t get bored at all. In fact right from the start i was hooked already!

I loved ALL of the characters that was introduced, i love the fact that it was SO multiple choice that it felt like you were really integrating yourself/oc onto the game and that you’re not just forced to say the same thing as a different choice or feel as though your options are limited. Its definitely a game that you’re supposed to replay over and over because its just that fun!!

And as someone who has never had a great childhood and adolescence, absentee parent, chaotic household, unsupportive friends, want to be understood (you know…this and that) i was so happy that this game was doing that and it genuinely gave me hope to live despite going through the darkest of times in my life :)

This game has changed me into a better person and made me want to be the best version of myself that i want to be in the future! I will infinitely recommend this to anyone who wants to have a feel good game/read (+1 it will make you cry!!)

Anyway enough yapping 💀 Time to get to the point.

Here are some playlists i made dedicated to the lovable characters of OL:BA that i personally listened to during my walkthrough and may relate to their route/lore ;)

read: playlists are super down below so keep scrolling!!

1# COVE HOLDEN

the og love interest!

summer with cove holden.

this playlist is the epitome vibes of the game (growing up with them and having fun, making memories.)

from beginnings to always with cove holden.

spoiler alert!! MARRIAGE DLC WOOOO!! really love this one cuz its all full of cute romance and wedding songs. i also put some songs that i think mc and cove would have when they get kids :3

#2 DEREK SUAREZ

MY PERSONAL FAVORITE!!

DEREK IS JUST SOOOO AAHHHH He’s my ideal man and i KIN him so bad you dont even know!!!

derek suarez crushing on you.

THIS PLAYLIST. IM TELLING YOU. one of the FAVES i made!! the pining, secret crush on mc for a loong time, the angst GOSH. so cute. every song in this plays a part on each moment with him i swear

#3 BAXTER WARD

ANGST MAN.

5 years after baxter ward.

one thing i noticed about our life is it lacks certain angst aspects when the baxter dlc didn’t exist YET back then. like i LOVED the fight between mc and cove in mcs room and i wanted it to escalate more ngl just cuz i LIVE for angst! but if you want to get real hurt you should choose baxter. this playlist focuses more on the last step of his dlc and its full of taylor swift songs.

baxter ward.

honestly this playlist is catered more to his vibes, his character (i listen to this playlist and i imagine edits of him lol) but i guess some songs are related to his story/lore? i made this waaay before 5 years after baxter ward and when the baxter dlc didn’t exist yet and we all just knew him to be as the new neighbor in sunset bird but people like it i guess so here it is xD

anyway thats all for OL:BA series! GB Patch is cooking up Our Life Now & Forever and it’s not released yet! just on demo on steam and itch! i already have a playlist for it but so far i have only made Qiu Lin (one of the leads of the game) i also have a privated filo inspired playlist for baxter if you want to listen to it let me know so i can put it up in public!

[strawberryraviegutz]

I feel like this needs to be said but..Am I the only one getting annoyed with the “Ame Chan is a bad person/problematic” discourse?? I’m not just talking about the ppl who’ve been complaining about her character saying they “didn’t realize how awful she was”. I’m also talking about ppl being like “lmao yall clearly didn’t play the game of course she’s a horrible person you’re just now realizing that??”

You don’t necessarily have to play a game to be a fan of it. It’s pretty common for ppl to watch gameplay videos or videos covering the story of/analyzing games and characters if they can’t or don’t wanna play it. Second I dont think we should just look at Ame through a black and white lense. Ame’s not a horrible person but she’s not necessarily good either. She’s a very VERY flawed person who struggles with mental health issues and addiction and makes rlly bad decisions and says rlly mean/bad things.

But that’s like…literally everyone on earth. Everyone has flaws especially mentally ill ppl, nobody’s perfect. It’s implied that Ame was literally abandoned/disowned by her parents so of course she’s not going to make the best decision with a “stable” mind especially if you’re desperate.

Ame Chan does terrible things/decisions like taking drugs on stream and self harming on stream and I think she even killed herself on stream too in one ending(tho feel free to correct me if I’m wrong) which is obviously irresponsible and dangerous. And she says things that aren’t necessarily nice or the best(some of it is warranted since some of the ppl in her chat were saying rlly awful, gross and even misogynistic things and calling her “old”).

And while she only wanted to be kangel for attention online, it’s kinda possible that she’s been able to have positive impacts on her fans/audience. We’ve seen how she is with the younger side of her fanbase as Kangel. She’s very kind and compassionate and overall very sweet towards them. Kangel’s entire persona is revolved around reaching out to lonley ppl online who’re struggling and to make them happy.

She may be doing it only for money snd attention, but like most ppl who struggle with mental health issues, they sometimes don’t realize the positive impacts they’ve had on the ppl around them. Hell maybe deep down Ame made Kangel to also help reach out to ppl like her online and make them happy too.

And as for the whole shotacon accusations, Ame Chan is NOT a shotacon. It was a very bad translation error and we all know that most translators aren’t always reliable(especially Google Translate) so please stop spreading that around. It’s been debunked already.

Maybe I’m biased because while I don’t have BPD(at least I don’t think so), have never taken drugs, nor have I ever cut myself in like a very VERY long time(tho I never left any scars cuz i didn’t like pain)and have an anxiety disorder and am autistic, I still sorta relate to/kin Ame Chan.

I’ve had my moments where I’ve had emotional and or violent outbursts(not where I’ve beat someone up or broke anything)due to a rush of emotion and or getting real worked up/frustrated online and irl.

And it’s always rubbed me the wrong way when I’ve been seeing ppl trying to put Ame into the box of “bad/problematic person” whether you’re trying to defend her character or not. It’s a lot more complex and morally grey than that and I think characters like her being in media are important to lessen the stigma of mental health whether it be in Japan or worldwide.

Feel free to correct me and fill me in on stuff if I missed anything or left anything out but in conclusion, Ame Chan is a not a good person, but she’s not necessarily a monster and or all bad either and I think ppl on both sides should realize that.

[loving-b3ar]

Someone anyone help me

I've been wondering if I'm on the aroace spec for a little while now but everytime I think I figure it out something about that sexuality doesn't fit how I feel and I have to start over again.

Ive known I was asexual or probably one the ace spec for a while, I would never have expected I would come to think I might be on the aromantic spec or both.

This whole fiasco started when I realized a lot of the characters I kin/find relatable generally have no feelings for explicit- ness or romance, or are confirmed aroace/majority hc aroace.

I started to think, starting with the ace half because it's simple, I don't have any desire to have sexual intercourse or anything like that with another person. Masturbation, reading NSFW, or thinking or imagining that with a fictional character is common for me, but if it were a real person or a fictional character were to come to life and try that, I'd immediately get the ick. I find it weird though because I'm very blunt with my sexual thoughts and make sexual jokes to friends a lot but can't even begin if I were put into a situation on able to do explicit stuff with another person IRL

Aromantic on another hand is different and much more complex. A lot of my crushes (or thought to be crushes) recently seemed to actually just be jealousy, gender envy and wanting to fit in. But I can't handle the thought of being

alone. I love romance and romantic

gestures (even though most of the time I get really tensed up with gifts, compliments and touches and usually hope that the gestures are quick so we can get past it, but kisses seem to be the only gesture I don't freeze up on, aslong as they're quick peck on the lips, no more- and some compliments are nice and make me happy, but not all.) but I realize now I never really had a desire for a relationship, I still fall for people but the crushes usually pass by quickly and I don't usually wanna pursue a relationship with someone. I thought about how I felt romantically for fictional characters and agreed they were romantically attractive, and liking them didn't make me feel weird. I'd constantly make ocs, self insert, even use a digital/drawing version of myself to ship with the characters, I eventually found out about fictiosexuality, and thought I'd be ficto aroace, until I saw somewhere how if a fictional character were to come to life, an aromantic wouldn't like them like that anymore, and I didn't feel that way, for me, I felt if a fictional character I liked were to come to life, I'd try to pursue a relationship with them, but if it's an irl person, I wouldn't, but I don't get or understand why, that fictional character coming to life, would mean they are real.

So why can't I have a desire to pursue a relationship with real people if I could with fictional character coming to life.

All I know is that I don't have any sexual desires to pursue with someone (unless it's sexual fantasies or it's singular) and I don't wanna pursue a romantic relationship (unless it were to be with a fictional character)

I dont really wanna have a talk more about how I feel and why but I'd appreciate if someone could suggest a few labels/flags for me to research!!

Sorry if some of it doesn’t make sense, it was pasted from notes. And sorry if this isn’t the place to ask, I also posted this on reddit!!

[barkspawn]

What kin of kinks do you think the sdv bachelors would have? I'll be honest I'm only asking because of Harvey (who strikes me as a very nervous but simultaneously bold dom at bare minimum) but I'm sure others would love to see your ideas for him and others.

This was fun, I'm ngl.

I'm gonna put it under a read more because it's suggestive? Idk the rules.

These are subject to change, as my opinion has changed roughly 2947649275 times.

Harvey: as known, he's definitely a different man in the bedroom than he is in public. Definitely more dominant. He needs somewhere for all of the release of his stress. Don't get me wrong, he still has anxious moments, especially if trying something completely new. He also has super passion-filled romantic sex sometimes too. But man has a secret side. Which, I have no doubt, he'd be willing to try anything with the right partner at least once. What's the word for being teased in public? That too. He has definitely locked the clinic up once or twice to use the exam room for more than examin’ ifyouknowwhatimean

Alex: definitely has a secret thing for exhibitionism. Not so much fucking in the town square as much as for the risk of being caught. He's a bit of a show-off, so I imagine this being the case. I feel like he'd make out in public or smack the booty. Or hell, smack his. It's all fun and it shows off that you're his. I'm ngl, and don't kill me, I feel like he's into degradation a lil bit too.

Shane is dominant. I have no doubt of that. He likes a strong woman for sure but he likes to be in control. I'd say he's into some choking/hair pulling or rough sex, though would definitely be sure you're on the same page. I imagine lots of open-mouthed kisses. Everywhere. His goal is to break you in the best possible way. If you're crying out his name or just LOUD, he's into it. Not super public in affection, but will be a teddy bear if you want him to be. Or let him. (this HC might change because it has a million times so far)

Sam is definitely one of the people with a worship kink. Definitely focuses on his partner’s pleasure. I wouldn't necessarily call him a sub, but I definitely think he likes his partner to... Take control every so often. He is playful as fuck and makes it easy to be comfortable, but obviously stops the silly when things get going. Genuinely, I think he is all about kisses. Lips, neck, stomach, thighs, literally anywhere.

Elliott is a passionate man and we all know it. He could get behind some roleplay for sure and is 100% vocal in bed. Can voices be a kink? Idk but he's constantly worshipping (there it is) and trying to show you how much he loves (and is happy to be fucking) you. Say his name and he's yours for literally forever. Imagine roleplaying as the characters in his romance novel lmao

Sebastian. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't considered this one in the past. (I mean Harvey too, given the one-shot but I digress). Seb def has a praise kink. I feel like if you praise him he'll lose his mind and because it makes him feel so good, he'll often praise you as well. He is also into power play. I genuinely believe that having someone fight for control is his thing. Depending on his mood, he might just let you win. It depends. But 10/10 has a power play and praise kink. I'm gonna tack on that he'd def be into biting and neck kissing I'm not sorry

Krobus’ kink is when you don't run away at the sight of him.

Note, it's possible I may have missed some. I don't often consider these things but lmao I should this was fun.

[uhshsmsmaka]

Kin list because I keep forgetting and I wanna keep it written so I remember

giving the biggest “please be my friend ur so cool please please please please” to whoever knows all of these characters

But I’ll say them here anyway, in order from the top left going right.

Mikey - rottmnt

SCP-035 - SCP Foundation

Tawnypelt - Warriors

Ennard - FNAF Sister Location

Dr. Iceberg - SCP Foundation

Moxxie - Helluva Boss

Space Kid - Camp Camp

Phone Guy - FNAF 1 (I think?? I never played the games..)

Phillip Graves - Call of Duty Modern Warfare (reboot)

uhhh idk if I label or spelt that right. I hope I did. That’d be kinda embarrassing if I didn’t lol..

———— why I kin them ig.

btw some stuff is headcanons like so and so being lgbtq and Graves having daddy issues

Mikey ROTTMNT- hell, there’s a lot of reasons.. it’s like… really personal with me lol

4th child, plus youngest. 3 older brothers and often gets left out, or brushed off from being involved. + aro/ace spec.

+ orange theme buddy agh I love u ur so pretty 💛💛

+ ADHD

SCP-035 - hmm.

Wants to watch the world burn, and is here for a good time and is really opportunistic with people, and often forms bonds with people for what they can give him… I’m a bad person I know. I’m trying to change.

+ Latin hehe

+ a lot of people really like him when they first meet, and learn the longer they spend with him, the worse he gets.

Tawnypelt - I’ll be honest, I don’t know much about her bc I didn’t read the 2nd arc, but from what I get, she seems to have struggled with gaining her own identity and being seen as someone other than a clone in her family. I struggle with people only knowing me for my brothers so I relate to her for this.

Also idk her leaving Thunderclan, despite her family, friends, and everything she knows and it being genuinely a good place she is comfortable and happy with— to Shadowclan so she can start a new life just touches me personally.

I don’t want to stay here. It’s not bad here, and everyone I love is here, but I don’t feel like I belong here, and I relate to her for it.

Ennard - yeah.. no, I got nothing. Idk why but he’s just like me fr.

Dr. Iceberg - HE’S AN ASSHOLE!!! I’m an asshole!!! Easily entertained, and doesn’t think of others that much, or the consequences of his actions. + mentally ill

+ bad taste in men

+ probably American with a small fraction of his ethnicity from Europe.

Moxxie - Daddy Issues. shit on by everyone. Underestimated kinda I guess???… and mixed morals. Often really polite— or at least is perceived to be, and is a thinker. Can go absolutely feral if necessary.

+ Italian I guess lmfao

+ short- ish..

+ adults and some older kids shall be referred to as ‘sir’ and ‘ma’am’

Space Kid - he likes space. What can I say?

He’s so silly. A lot of the actions and stuff he does feels like stuff I would have done/do.

+ brown hair

Phone Guy - tries to help and probably fails. Hey, he’s trying.

Phillip Graves - Daddy issues. I also headcanon his dad was in the military and he moved around a lot and lived throughout the US, so he’s fairly decent at adapting to different places, and tolerate as hell. “It is what it is” mentality about most everything out of his control.

Finds that one person and looks up to them, and gets really clingy and obsessed with them. Doesn’t show it of course, but in his head he wants to impress them and please them in every way possible. *cough, Shepherd, cough cough*

(I met a lotta people I hyperfixated on giving away everything to make them happy. We’re just casual friends now. Except for that one. She was mean as hell to me. We still meet occasionally tho.)

Outside of headcanons, his personality and the way he acts is just very familiar and relatable to me.

+ American (wtf is a kilometer🦅🫡🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸🦅🦅💥🦅🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸)

+ makes shitty jokes no one laughs at

[rudywashere]

MARI ANALYSIS (sorta)

NOTE: these are just my personal thoughts about mari’s personality and flaws and most of the proves and reasons i give and show are mostly based off my own interpretation of mari + me projecting myself because she’s a heavykin of mine whagwjswvskegskshq most of the points may sound squishy too because i just copied and pasted everything here while i was talking to my friend at that time

!!!!! AND OBVIOUSLY THERES GONNA BE SPOILERS OF OMORI!!!!!

So many people know and love mari for being the perfect older sister of sunny and overall an older sisterly figure to the rest of the group (except hero of course hahsga) and i am one of those people that love her because of it. despite me heavy kinning her i do have an issue with her character that is kinda being left out whenever people talk abt mari: she barely has any flaws

and whenever the group talked about mari they mostly discussed how perfect she was and how she was literally an angel because of how sweet she is!!! like don’t get me wrong obviously when someone you loved so much dies you can’t think of any negative traits about the person who passed away. you just constantly think about the positive memories you’ve shared with that person. It’s just impossible to think about the negative traits about a beloved one who passed away.

But still even as a mari kinnie myself it kind of bothered me how no one talked about her flaws and such. We all just saw mari as someone who is an older sisterly figure and how perfect she is. The closest we’ve gotten to a flaw of Mari is this

Mari wants to be so perfect that she gets disappointed so quickly when something isn’t good enough for her or doesn’t go according to her plan. That’s it. And whenever people talk about her flaw they mostly associate it with when Mari and Sunny had the fight because Sunny was too pressured thanks to Mari’s perfectionism

PLEASE HOLD ON TO ME IVE GOT A POINT!! Like mari cares ALOT that she HAS to be presented in a perfect manner or else she’ll be unsatisfied. Remember when mari took extra classes to be fully prepared for college??

She did all of it because she really wants to be fully prepared for college. okay now here comes the copy and paste stuff HAVSHAH

If you think abt the college part again mari chose to do these extra classes to be 100% prepared for college and have a perfect start for it because she fears that if she isn’t prepared enough for college, she would fail and failing would not fit her at all because she wants people to see her as a person who can deal with anything and is very independent. It fits to her “perfect status”. So i can see whenever something happens that could even mess some small things up she’ll get frustrated IMMEDIATELY and tries to fix it by herself because Mari is someone who doesn’t want to rely on others. She wants to handle everything by herself.

Personally I think it all started when people started to rely on Mari (mostly the younger ones/the kids that aren’t hero) and start telling her they see her as a motherly/older sisterly figure and mari was so happy to hear it that she doesn’t want to disappoint everyone by failing. So to keep up that title so she will do her best for the sake of not disappointing people. It’s really important to her but also for her friends and Sunny because she cares about them so much.

You could think that Mari’s biggest fear is either the thought of failing itself or disappointing everyone else surrounding her. And I also think that Mari is someone who fears major changes too like MASSIVE changes.

She is someone who wants everyone and everything to stay happy and nice as it has always been. So even the smallest mistake could be horrifying to her and ruin everything, which is why she has to keep everything perfect and make sure everything stays exactly how it is right now. For the sake of her friends’ precious life.

I think the fear of major changes may had hit her SO HARD when she passed away because ever since she died the group had split up, Sunny didn’t leave his house for four entire years and almost everyone isn’t exactly how they used to be. (Aubrey becoming an aggressive person with lots of built up anger or Hero becoming extremely lonely and depressed, having no real desire to keep up)

And because Mari doesn’t want to rely on others and instead lets everyone else rely on her, she doesn’t want to blame anyone for anything that has happened. I remember one specific scene where Sunny looked around in his house and there was some dialogue to a vase that was something like: “A replacement of the vase you have accidentally broken. Mari took the blame for you and said she broke it.”

Hell Mari didn’t even want to blame Sunny for her own death. She instead blames herself. Because of one little mistake she has done. And that mistake was pushing her perfectionism way too hard for the sake of not wanting to disappoint everyone else especially at the upcoming recital. And to think she died while facing one of her worst fears is honestly extremely upsetting for me. Man

Like Mari tried everything from preventing to make something NOT happen only to happen in one of the worst ways possible. Pushing her perfectionism so hard to the of the mistakes she has caused leading her into her own death. And the major changes she has caused to everyone else but also to the friendgroup itself because of it.

I can see why she would take the whole blame for herself and not even dare to make Sunny feel guilty about it. Not only because he’s her little brother but also because she is someone who wants to be responsible. And someone who didn’t want to disappoint everyone else.

PHEWWWWWW

TO SUM IT UP mari is someone who fears failure, little mistakes and especially major changes and her death had made her face those fears. and it’s all thanks to her wanting to be perfect and a reliable, responsible person who’d do anything to make the friend group stay together!!! I really wish omocat wouldve shown more of her flaws in the game and show her “not perfect” nature too!! and her friends would still love her even though she can’t stay perfect forever!!! but she’d still be very very nervous about it!!! again that could be mostly me projecting myself onto her because i heavykin her HAVSGAHSHAH anyways uhmmm if you have read all of it im gonna be SOOO HAPPY ABOUT IT AYAYAYAYA and if not that’s fine too!!’ :D

take care and stay healthy!!!! <333

[katyspersonal]

Alright, go crazy, go stupid ✌️

48. What’s your favorite physical/design feature for this character?

For the Bloodborne girl cast!

uhhh, Maria, Doll, Annalise, Henriett, Gratia, Queen Yharnam, Ebrietas, Rom, Flora, Kos, Arianna, Adella, Eileen, white church doctor, black church doctor, Fausefka, Iosefka, Old Lady lol, Viola, Gascoigne’s daughters, Mergo’s Wet Nurse, Vicar Amelia, Witches of Hemwick, uhhhhhhh, Yurie, Bell Women, Cainhurst portrait women, Dores, Adeline,…..uhhhh….well….dammit if I have forgotten someone very important then I apologize to all women.

(Ask from this ( x ) meme) Ohhhh boy, look who heard out my wish to discuss the design features!! Thank you very much!

48) What’s your favorite physical/design feature for this character?

ATTENTION: for some of these characters I might use my own headcanons on their appearances as an answer!

Maria and Doll: their lovely super pale eyelashes! As usual, common Fromsoft W putting effort into a detail that is hard to notice by normal means!

As for the distinct design elements (which in their case their clothes), for Maria I love the cute smaller broches by either side of her main one, and for the Doll I love her cute floral-patterned gloves!

Annalise: I love her big forehead. I am worried that I miss out this feature on accident sometimes in my drawings of her (just need more art skill), but I am mindful about it!

Henriett: I love that she either 1) is implied to wear a makeup (gotta stay class no matter what) or 2) just has naturally different color for brows and eyelashes? Common Fromsoft W on details no sane person would detect yet AGAIN. Close second is her awesome top hat that no one wears like her.

Gratia: I love her red hair so much. She has the most red hair in the setting. I love this so much. Hers is more red than Cainhurst red, even.

(From this ( x ) page with datamined corpse models, some of the following ones will also be from here)

Queen Yharnam: This is exclusive for her pregnant/boss variant, the one we interact with peacefully doesn't have them. But I love cute rose-themed decorations around her gown! Adorable detail!

Ebrietas: Her big anime girl green eyes, what else I can say? x) The very distinct feature, and they look like there are green cosmic nebulas shining inside them!

Rom: This is hard to choose because this IS the perfect female body, I think her existence alone should prove how useless beauty standards are dhfsdh I will never be her 😔 Her adorable tails is the close second, but I love that she is a forest. What grows on her back is more resembling of tree branches with glowing buds! This is not lumenweed, this is lumenWOOD! XD

Flora: The small wings. Of the 'skinny' type and not birdlike type, same as Ebrietas' and celestial children, but kinda damaged, or undeveloped? These wings tell a story. Feels similar to how Amygdalae have just lump of flesh in the place of wings, but their Kin, Gardens of Eyes, do have beautiful butterfly wings! It feels like a theme of needing humanity (?) to be truly fulfilled. Jealous Moon, eh?

Kos: I love her fins, especially the fin on her back! Well, it doesn't look very fin-like anymore, and there is clearly better look at it on the concept art! Just...... fish

Arianna: I love her purple eyes! Really stands out! I was really excited to find out she had such unusual feature!

Adella: Similarly to Henriett, I love how her brows and eyelashes color has a contrast with her hair color! Hers is paler!

Eileen: The only truly notable feature about her design is her unique mask, as Bloody Crow wears the same garb, and I feel like it won't really say anything.. The girl doesn't even have canon face data! So let me pull my own out uhhh..

I am quite happy with her beak! x) I needed the resemblance of 'crow' in her visual design, you don't understand! My initial idea for her design, though, was making her blonde in earlier life and then have silver, basically white hair in her old age, while still having skin dark because contrast is so good. It would be to symbolise a change, from "sunshine" to "moonlight".. I got discouraged when I was told it was 'unrealistic' feature for dark skinned people (and should not have listened, because Bloodborne already has two characters canonically who are blondes with dark skin). If I ever backtrack on that idea for her, consider the beautiful white hair and how it contrasts to be the answer!

White Church Doctor: In this case I will go for the obvious answer. This is her cute mole! I am so happy when other people notice it too!! When someone draws this character and does feature the mole, I am so happy ;-;

Black Church Doctor: I love the shape of her eyes! Interestingly though, she uses the same sliders as female preset hunter (in initial character creation), and her eyes are green like Brador's and have a similar shape, also her eyelashes are same color as his. Both Brador and Paleblood Hunter come from the same foreign land as their clothes lore suggest, so... same country? Or even relation to Brador? Hello....?

Fauxsefka and Iosefka: Eyelashes. Eyelashes. They use the especially long variant of eyelashes. I always enjoy drawing them, especially Fauxsefka's!

Lonely Old Dear: This is the hardest one yet, because there is nothing particular to point out. There are no other distinct old female characters we are shown in the game, nor her outfit is unique as there are many corpses in this outfit in Yahar'gul (and one in the woods). I do like the cute setting-appropriate hat, but I think a more fair one is to say that they bothered showing her eyes condition!

Viola: I love her red brooch! ...that we never do see on her in the game. But I think it is a really good detail for her design, and the best color to contrast with both her hair and clothes!

Older Daughter: This is an interpretation liberty, since this can and likely is a blood drop, but I like to think she has a spot on her forehead!

Younger daughter: Another case where I gotta use my own design! I like how her appearance mixes that of both parents rather than resembling one or another x) Gascoigne used to have auburn hair and green eyes, so hers mix those colors with Viola's blonde hair and blue eyes!

Mergo's Wet Nurse: Uhhhhh everything?? She is so incredibly stylish? fdsjfdshfd I fucking LOVE the absurd amount of heavily detalized trinkets all over her body! Get it.... because crows love shinies...... haha....

(Take a closer look at all her glory in wiki's gallery ( x ))

Amelia: Her very tiny tail. :3

Witches of Hemwick 1 and 2: The fact that!!!!! the eyes are all different colors??? How sick is this??? Look at this! Some also have iris whitening, same as what happened with Djura's eyes, and others have fully enlargened pupil!

Witch of Hemwick 3: Okay, you absolutely saw this one coming lol. I love how wide is her nasal bridge! Very distinct feature! (Also coming clear with my skill issue, as I do not give a justice to her eyes; in reality they're smaller and located wider from each other!)

Yurie: I really like her lips shape, actually! Very full, very smoochable.

Bell-Ringing Women: I love the decoration circling around their cape! This really adds to the design, it looks so much better this way than if it was just plain cape as is!

Cainhurst portrait women: Damn, they are all so beautiful! I guess as for Bell-Ringer resembling one, the previous point applies! Though she looks like she could be mother of Iosefka and Fauxsefka? And the knight woman has a very distinct nose shape! With Annalise's mother (I am not sure who else would wear a crown on portrait whereas not being Annalise..), I of course love how long her neck is x) Her posture is so regal, and this emphasises it!

Similar feature shared with the one who wears silver variant of the Noble Dress (basically Arianna's dress, and even identical shoes, but a bit more detailed in a couple of places). I'm gonna say though, I do love the silver variant more than burgundy one, especially with Forsaken Castle Ghosts whose hair became platinum! And the old lady has not only the necklaces, but also earrings and the bracelet which are quite modest and harder to see, but they are here! I love this attention to small details!

Dores: As iconic as her wearing a scalp of Pthumerian face like a mask is, but my favourite bit is, actually, the ungodly amount of tools dangling from her belt! My Mico in his Research Hall surgeon era can only dream about the same level of unsettling x)

Adeline: Again, she has the appearance of a Research Hall patient with the exception of larger amount of belts (she is feral!) and unique bandana around her neck! It feels unfair to point out either of these, because... yeah, sure. They just make her distinct. So I'll refer to my version of her and say that I love her hair buns and want to squeeze them every time I draw her. x) The bandana IS precious, though!

______________________

Okay that was WILD, thank you for letting me go mad dfhahds You HAVE forgotten Hemwick Gravewomen, Evil Labyrinth Spirits, Snail/Slug Women, Mergo's Chief Attendants and female Beast Patients though XD I've met Tumblr images limit so I have to combine into one image.

But, Hemwick Gravewomen have strangely elongated skulls, and I love this bit. Considering the bandage over their forehead, perhaps, they've found their own way to place eyes on their brain? With statue behind Memory Altar and in the dungeons featuring a stitch over forehead and Rune Tool being found in Hemwick, would not be surprising. And with Evil Labyrinth Spirits, I guess I love the cool feature that is only in the concept art, but didn't make it into the actual model?? The evil red spirits erupting from her belly area are so badass??

With Slug Women, I guess the only thing I can tell is which variant I like more... And it is the shell one, of course x) Or simply red eyes with female Beast Patients! But with Chief Attendants, the plate on their bellies features upturned wings, and this is my favourite detail! They could represent wings of Wet Nurse or Flora! I love the mystery hidden on the plain sight so much!! Why could not Bloodborne give us a way to farm armour from mobs so we could read the description that would explain... ;-;

Okay, now my brain is OFFICIALLY fried (in a good way), and this post definitely will help me as a good self-reference! This is, however, now one of my favourite posts by myself, because.. many women.

[yotsubaclover]

explaining my blorbo associations pt2: jules who i do not draw often im so sorry u look like that babygirl

song: i actually... have never made a jules playlist LMAO my jules brainrot is so academic i could spit theories for him but not songs. so i had to dive into my spotify likes and find something. goldilocks spot is actually from a very old jolyne playlist i made but i think it also fits jules. to me it's a song about being painfully aware of how... average? not-outstanding? just there? you are and the angst that comes with it, the bitterness towards other people (in jules' case, for not seeing him as who he knows himself to be—a noble). but there's also a stubborness and pride that keeps you from fully confronting those feelings/that dilemma and finding peace within it, which is fitting for the persistent turbulence within jules... a lot of this is my (quite liberal?) interpretation tho so yeah

color & object: purple is the color of royalty and lavender is pretty and calming and healing. quite the nice set of descriptions for someone like jules :)

animal: i dont kin assign animals often so this was hard. but i chose raven as a parallel to doves... because jules' dove of happiness was/is rosemarine, and because jules is almost like rose's shadow in many ways... also ravens are kinda bad omens i feel like for all the gentleness jules shows he is also obviously capable and willing to do terrible things, he's selfish and prideful and even a little greedy... and lol i think the negativity also fits some of his self-image

drink: tea! of course! what else would i put

aesthetic: i think classic dark academia with all its elite-ness and occult-ness and general fucked up-ness would be a very average jules genre. smack him in a dark academia plot a la secret history and he's right at home lol. even his fallen noble status makes for an interesting pov in a dark academia story. the genre's potential for class analysis and commentary too is jules de ferrier

other: i think it was a fic which was about jules and perfume which made me think about this association... lavender was the scent too so that is another explanation to the above lol. as for the shadows again it's cos of his duo thing with rosemarine but also everything he does is kind of... in the shadows... he has engaged in shady shit (gang moment???) and is often lurking/observing situations (as the right hand man yk) and also just him looking out for the people he cares about even if in incredibly convoluted ways (see: rosemarine and jules' deal with the thugs who wanted to beat him up when they first arrived at lacombrade). he does the dirty work in the dark or smth like that. tbh there are a lot of oppositions with rosejules, the light/shadow thing is pretty on the nose i think but my favorite is probably the feminine/masculine. (disclaimer thisis an idea spitball Only so pls do not sue me for incorrect use of terminology; im sorry feminist theory i promise ill read more of you BUT a lot of the ideas kind of branch out of 2nd wave ideas/concepts i believe)

because publicly rose seems to take the patriarchal role as the superintendent (ie. being the disciplinarian, having power, being the symbol of the institution) while jules assumes a more matriarchal role as advisor, someone more approachable and "kinder" than the patriarch... then it all gets skewed because of auguste's presence, so they actually switch with rose being "feminized" and jules being "masculinized" but anyway LOL i have many thoughts on this specific kind of. feminist/queer inspired reading of rosejules

i hate his ass so much cos it's so fucking hard to break his character down in a comprehensible way. the thesis topic thing is only partly a joke. i genuinely think with the depths i am going to look at this i can find something in him or maybe im just delusional lmao i probably am

[jils-things]

❨♡❩ valentine's week ; familial day

familials have been such an important factor in my time as a selfshipper recently because i truly came to appreciate what is familial love. it's just that really nice feeling of pride and appreciation for someone you really care about. i'm excited to say that i have a lot in my roster to share! reading isn't mandatory for anyone viewing - writing my feelings help me articulate my words well.

first and probably my most important one yet is ruby stone! at first, I wasn't really interested in the whole "he's my son concept" but i just knew that ruby was an instant favorite of mine after reading the manga. it's funny, because i actually did kin him at one point (i mean, i can still say i kin him but because i'm a selfshipper first, manga consumer second. i see him as my son more). i see myself a lot in him especially in his flaws. but because a friend told me it would be fun if i had called him a familial, it wouldn't be so bad (and steven is also there. wouldn't it be a cute family?). i initially drafted jaide stone and ruby to just be friends but ruby has a special attachment to her (due to his personal issues with his father) but that shit changed FAST and thus, ruby stone was born. i adore my silly boy, he makes me so happy and i admire his character. he's different from the other protagonists and it makes him stand out all the more. I'm so proud of him, his whole story made me so emotional and i just want to hug him and let him know everything's okay and he has every right to be who he wants.

am i allowed to talk about my husband? i mean he IS ruby's father so,,, heheh. ill keep it short or else it becomes a romantic love letter to my hunni sorry 😚 anyways i always imagined steven to want to have kids and ruby was the best thing he ever asked for. he's so proud of him too. they went through a rough patch as a father and son but things gotten better and they're very happy to call each other family. 💚

ahh, my favorite silly stinky little brother. gold! this one's got a long history. i was always a big fan of ethan/gold as a protagonist in the games. but i had no idea that this version ethan (or as the manga calls him, gold.) was simply the best for me. he's got this special spark that really checks off my list of what makes a character my favorite! just like ruby, i also see myself a lot in him. (heck, even my sister thinks i'm super gold-coded) he was so shaped to be my best friend or little brother, and i picked the latter. he's probably the most comedic, and has a very deep emotional side that i like to philosophize about. po.kespe kids are written with much difficulty and he's no exception. if i had a brother, i feel like this is how i would treat him.

okay this one's gonna be SUPER confusing which i'll apologize over and over again i'm so sorry 😭😭 for this one, i'd like go introduce blake and nate (respectively). these two are completely different from each other, but i still have this maternal/big sister care for both of them. just like gold - nate is one of my favorite protagonists by game and learning their personalities in both manga and game (pkmn masters ex) made me adore them even more. i think ilynne (oc) is the first girl who has more priority over familial and platonics than romantics. i think that's very cool! it's hard to say everything here why i love both versions but if you took a look for yourself, maybe you'll understand hehe. (also, nate just has the BEST protagonist design. hello? who wouldn't love him? definitely not me!!!!) it was only because of pkmn masters ex that made me like nate a lot. his voicelines makes me feel so comforted like that's just a really happy boy! he sounds so excited for everything and his giggles just cleanse my soul 😭 i could pat his head all day. silly pineapple boy. blake just... i dunno man. it's probably because i already liked his base design so naturally I'd like his manga ver too 😭 they pulled a wildcard in designing this kid like he's a fuckin agent!!! that's so cool!!! hes a fuckin hater!!! look at him go i can fix the edgy kid !!! by being his mom!!! (lore accurate btw)

ah yes. the most fanbase developed kid ever. it's carmine! this kid is so special. his entire existence came from a fan created f.n.f mod and everyone ran with it - just like me. i remember constantly keeping tabs with this mod and i was always curious to know what carmine has in his story - playing the mod itself was such a pleasant surprise. my whole attention was shifted to carmine's story - it's rewritten slightly to make the creepypasta more impactful and it certainly did make me feel sympathetic for the little guy. giving him the sweetest and admired big brother to love and care for him was the best design i ever thought of. after the devs added more story, it made me feel all the more protective of carmine. unfortunately he's not the most lively boy around as he's bullied for his insignificance. i would do anything to let him know he's loved. (AGGRESSIVELY FORGETS THE PART WHERE HE'S PAINFULLY POSSESSED BY THE FUCKIN GHOST BEGONE!!!!)

i think what also powered how much i love carmine was the endless support i got from the actual fans of the mod on twt. even the devs approved it and it made me feel so happy and reassured that it's okay to appreciate him (it was actually a little nerve-wracking to post rhys and carmine on twt because carmine is... technically an oc). that's why i describe carmine to be a special kind of fo. he's an oc of a mod and that's pretty neat

those are my main familials, but i'd also like to give a shoutout to my secondary familials!

when i tell you there's so many cool characters in this game I wasn't JOKING. these guys are so... AUGHH i feel like they would be the best guys to have around to make my day better. looker is more uncle shaped to me, he's not exactly the BEST caretaker (shh i know emma) but i know he's trying his best. it's hard to juggle being an agent and a friend but i understand that and i appreciate his efforts. playing platinum to see this guy appear, i just KNEW he's gonna be the coolest. and i wasnt wrong! he's associated with my oc ilynne along with blake! for po.kespe consumers, yes - they are all coworkers!

professor sy.camore is definitely a father figure to me. i love his enthusiasm and i know he's the best guy to cheer someone up. his cheerfulness is endless and he literally mentors 4 kids, if he can do that then surely he can make my day better (a miserable young adult /jjj) i really wanted to make a kalosian oc for him. i envisioned the oc to be an ex team flar.e member who wanted to renew herself from her past deeds (as she was foolish to not understand lysandre's grand plan) and sy.camore was there to rescue her from her crisis and helped her start somewhere by being a student under his care. they would develop a father-daughter dynamic and i think that's very sweet 🥺💚

in case you noticed. my main familials are a case of like ... me wanting to nurture them. but my secondaries are the other way around and it's like... what if i was the one being nurtured and cared for? pretty cool...

that's all for today. thank you familials 💚

[luckyshouse]

hi! im the asker of that not too vague not too personal question, haha. i did want to sincerely thank u outside of a like for responding and talking about it all; more is more, i'm so glad you had more to share!! i've only been able to understand or recognize my alters through fictional media, *ESPECIALLY* character tropes, like you mentioned?!!? it was basically the main tool i had that i could use to mentally cleave the concept of the alter apart from "me," which i also don't have a strong grasp of the desires/etc of, and when i looked around at typical experiences of fictives where they appear clear-cut instead of like blurry bundles of vague tropes and ways that a character acts, i felt for sure that i'd been misjudging myself when i used rules of thumb like "oh these tropes i'm exhibiting in this moment align with chara undertale, the character i bought a sweater to match with and act like, [X] is fronting, i guess??" -- the thing about kankri and having a "rule" about attractiveness hit too, in the sense that i couldn't have an alter from media i found too self-indulgent. this is a lot about moi you didn't need to know but genuinely. thank you for posting. thank you for making the art and the posts you do. i had no idea someone who i follow for it would make me have to sit with a disorder that a week ago i had completely tossed out the idea of despite also having the privilege of pretty persistent external validation from very obvious trauma. have a good one!

i'm so glad you were able to get help and gain something from my posts and art :') genuinely this is one of the sweetest things i've ever been told and i am so happy i could've helped. i understand completely, especially when i first started figuring out my system, i felt exactly like what you're describing. creating fursonas that embody those tropes have helped me so so much, but thats also because i at heart am a furry person. i have been making fursonas since before i could use the internet. and i think its really important that people talk about these things because DID is less so a specific set of rules that someone exists within and moreso a disorder that is extremely personalized to the person experiencing it. i think constantly about how DID generationally would portray in extremely different ways. someone with DID in the 50s is completely different than someone who has DID in the 2020s, because we have computers, we have new forms of media and entertainment and escapism. we have roleplaying and kinning where as a long time ago i'm sure systems were more focused on like television, or books, or spoken word. DID is a disorder characterized by completely dissociating from the body for extended periods of time, attempting to severe and fracture yourself when engaging with your body, but uiltimately, it is a disorder that is about being extremely abstracted from your physical self due to repeated and consistant trauma. i think its silly how people attempt to police how DID presents, becuase its like, how the fuck do you know someones "escapism" is wrong? you think theyre maladaptive daydreaming incorrectly? that doesn't make any sense. and i am so happy that i could portray other examples of DID so people know it isn't exclusively a one-model type of disorder.

this year has been really really rough on me, it's lead me to shedding a lot of things i considered core beliefs or held onto really tightly, due to nearly developing sepsis at one point and everything else going on in my life, i've decided that i'm trying to put all my effort into healing and learning who i actually am and who i want to be. i started making my art because i realized i was putting all of my energy into making art to create something for a bigger audience, and while that was helpful at the time, i want to create for myself. i want things i can be proud of not just because of the reception but because i internally feel proud and pandered to. im so happy my art means something to someone else

i hope you have a good night. :)

[clarythericebot]

On the friendships in Emma M. Lion

The way Emma M. Lion deals with friends is so delightful and makes me so happy. My thoughts are running around, so let me try to concretize it:

I appreciate that she has friends from her past. Her existence doesn't start at the beginning of the novel, and while portraying the growth of a relationship from conception is a valid writer choice to do to get readers very invested, I appreciate that Emma has vibrant friendships that spring from the rich life she's already lived before our own acquaintance with her begins.

She's friends with family. She's affectionate towards her older cousin, Arabella, and while there doesn't seem to be Affection with her aunt, it's pretty clear that her aunt is looking out for her. (I appreciate this because I feel like there is a strict divide between friends and family in many of the stories I read, and this one highlights that you can have fun relationships with your kin.)

The friends from her past aren't introduced all at once. Definitely keeps things from being overwhelming. But more than that--we can see how, even in their absence, her friends affect Emma. She loves and thinks fondly of them. So, by the time they're officially introduced, you love and are fond of them too.

Her past relationships grow and change. For example, Emma enters an event and encounters her childhood nemesis, who she remembers hating and who hated her. But he's grown up, and after a little bit of reluctance, Emma accepts the fact and rejoices in it.

It's very refreshing that the chemistry that Emma has with multiple male friends doesn't mean her swooning over them or the narrative pushing a romantic arc. I mean, I love romantic arcs, and I believe that we'll probably get one for Emma in the future. But it's impressive to me that whichever potential love interest actually comes forward (and it's impressive to me that I can't say with certainty which one will--as of the beginning of the third book, there's no one male character that is marked out as Emma's One True Love), nothing supercedes that they're all interesting characters that have genuine and interesting relationships with Emma, and bring out different sides of her. In other words, I love that the writer doesn't skimp on the friends part of friends to lovers.

Emma doesn't have 'a group of friends'. She has friends from different contexts in her life. Can I just say how marvelous and lovely this is? I don't know, I think modern stories romanticize One True Group of Friends almost as much as One True Love. Emma doesn't have a specific pack of people that all have relationships to one another. She's friends with her maid, her cousins, childhood people she interacted with, someone she's met in a ball, her tenant, her vicar, her schoolmates, and the people she's encountered in St Crispian's. Sometimes these people intersect. Sometimes they don't. Emma doesn't feel the need to get them together in one place and she sometimes outright states she doesn't want them to, considering how markedly different those characters are. But the fact that Emma can be friends with this fun diversity of people is very cool.

She makes friends with her friends' friends and it introduces interesting new dynamics. Like, I just said that it's cool that Emma has disparate friendships, but it is also interesting when a new friend provides insight to aspects of an old one's life Emma didn't know. (Spoiler Alert: I'm talking about Mary and Jack. The pair are fascinating, and his hints that there's something going on with Mary intrigue me.)

[halogenwarrior]

In response to the Needletail content I’ve been getting on my dashboard recently: the thing with Needletail is that 99% of the time, I really like and find her fascinating for her flaws and don’t like when people try to “soften” her as a character, except for one part which I would absolutely get rid of if I were rewriting the books, which I think is the main reason she comes off to some fans as less “tragically selfish punk” and more “gratingly selfish punk”. That is, the part in the Apprentice’s Quest where she is the first one to suggest separating Twigkit and Violetkit. This part just doesn’t fit with how she is portrayed, and particularly her relationships with Violetshine and Alderheart, in the later books (and given how Thunder and Shadow, where much of the “inconsistent” stuff appears, was written by a different author than The Apprentice’s Quest, this might even be a case of the author not even being aware of that detail). 

Because the thing is, if you take away that part the relationship between Needletail and Violetshine is very tragic - messed up and not healthy for Violetshine in the end, but genuinely loving and with the society around them also being to blame for why it’s so messed up. If you just take Thunder and Shadow on its own: we have Violetkit, a kit who was wronged by her Clan by treating her as a political tool due to how they don’t care for outsiders unless they can provide some use to them, and you don’t need to love and pay attention to someone for them to be useful... and Needlepaw, who feels alienated by her Clan and rebels against it, also seeing them as not noticing her. If you just take this book alone, Needlepaw having to initially be cajoled by Alderpaw to pay attention to Violetkit doesn’t sound as damning as some Needletail haters make it out to be - she’s a teenager, of course she shouldn’t be expected to be the sole provider to a kit who the Clan has neglected, she’s not mature enough for that and she shouldn’t be expected to be, though the bond she later forms with her is genuine. And she genuinely relates to this kit for having similar disillusionment as her, her caring is completely genuine, but at the same time she is, again, selfish and immature, risking Violetkit’s life just to send a message to Rain and pushing her into joining the Kin (not because she just likes manipulating little kids into bad lifestyles but because she herself genuinely romanticizes them and her chance at finding a purpose through their violence and freedom, and in her mind Violetkit is just a mini Needlepaw, she must want and need the same things as her). The tragedy is that, as I said, she never should have had that responsibility in the first place despite her genuine love and devotion towards Violetkit, and her guilt-tripping and “you will only be happy with me” comes from genuine desperate loneliness rather than machiavellianism, is only reinforced by the outside environment as Rowanstar makes it clear he really doesn’t want or care for Violetkit, when he should have taken a stand agains this kit being left only in Needlepaw’s charge. And the tragedy is further cemented in Shattered Sky where Violetpaw, stuck with a caretaker figure who is not mature enough for the job and is now in the horrible situation of being trapped in a cult-type situation, losing the cats she loves and fearing for her life every day, recognizes Needletail’s immaturity and gets the horrible idea that she has to be Needletail’s caretaker, feeling like must be the martyr for her and even that Needletail would be within her rights to kill Violetpaw. And despite that it isn’t so strange that Needletail would sacrifice herself for Violetpaw, because the love still is genuine! 

All of this is horribly undermined by having Needletail be the one to suggest separating the kits. First of all, it feels especially odd narratively to have this separation moment to set up Rowanstar as being cruel towards outsiders for an out-of-touch idea of political gain to explain why the apprentices are disillusioned, and then show the primary disillusioned apprentice be fully on board with the callous politics game and even having suggested it. Second of all, this is the reason that a lot of people read Needletail’s saying she relates to Violetpaw and they are both alone in the world as lies and manipulation, if she really related to her she wouldn’t be the cause of Violetpaw being alone in the first place and never show any guilt about it or even bring it up. And of course, Alderheart never brings it up either, the narrative treats it as if it didn’t happen and they are just a makeshift family who are trying in their own flawed ways to be a light in the kit’s life beyond the cruel games of their leaders. Having Needletail do that diminishes her character into “one-dimensional abuser who is just bad in every way”, except the narrative forgets she ever did that and does not treat her at all like a one-dimensional abuser, leading to a lot of people being frustrated with how she is treated by said narrative.

I genuinely think if they just got rid of this Needletail would have an argument for being the best-written Warriors character. (Well there would still be the issue of how her bonus story backstory tries to explain her alienation from her Clan with a single “folk-psychology” incident of being forgotten by them once in a way that doesn’t even sound unreasonable of them, rather than it being a more gradual and subtle thing she experiences throughout her life. But that’s another issue...) 

[digidrakncreature]

Absolute shortest comprehensive summary of my altbeing stuff:

"digimorph" kardiatype

identity as a semi-digital shapeshifting goblin/gremlin/creature thing (default "in a vacuum" me) nicknamed it "drakncreature" for now.

draknkind (HTTYD-ish draconic creatures)¹

deltarune-esc monsterkind (via hearthome-turned-wishkin²)

canine-hearted (all canines and canine-shaped creatures) (might be partially archetropal idk)

questioning sitcom character archetrope³

Scavenger identity piece that's important but uncategorized (vaguetype?)⁴

This is partially theory about Before This Life and partially recounting stuff I know happened This Life.

— started as "digimorph", a fluid shape-shifting entity in a digital/videogamey LitRPG universe.

— instead of dying properly was flung outside the universes. enough awareness to decide on goal of: design a body that I could be comfortable in and consider "me" and find a place I could settle down and call home.

— Short reincarnation as drakn. No memories of that life, but strong imprint of species.

— Incarnated Here, possibly because this Earth has a LOT of fiction to scour through for ideas. Took like 25 years to figure out draknfeelings. Recently (within the last few years) realized Deltarune is almost perfect for a home (without all the Dark Worlds stuff and possibly other differences that we don't know about yet.) Adapted my bodydesign to that world, made myself Deltarune-esc Monsterkind half on purpose.

[footnotes in readmore]

¹ Either alternate canon to HTTYD/DreamWorks Dragons or unrelated but very similar. I don't really relate to dragons-as-a-concept/ dragons in general. (Usually don't mind being included with dragons or being called a dragon though.)

² Half-cheeky reclaiming of "wishkin". I call this kintype my "wishtype" for various reasons.

³ Nonliteral thing where I blame "the writers" for various odd occurrences and coincidences and shit that happens to me. Apparently it fits under archetropy.

⁴ "Scavenger" is the best word I have for it. Basically I feel fulfilled by finding things, saving them, holding on to them until I find a use or someone needs it. This includes physical objects, ideas, anything really. I particularly feel very happy when I find something useful and take it from something bad. It's also a big part of my intentional patchwork identity, the making of Me on purpose.

Other notes:

My definition of a kin(d)type is: I identify as a member of this group.

Quoiluntary monsterkindtype (it was literally half on purpose and half not). Felt drakn whole This life.

I'm not too fussed about labels, exactly, I just need words to think and talk about things. I tend to mash words together for my own use.