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pinkhairedlily · 3 years ago

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Chapter 7 - Student Council President Sakura

SCPS AO3 | PREVIOUS CHAPTER

Sakura went to her shift a little bit giddier than usual for a variety of reasons despite the busy holiday season; it was nearing Christmas after all. The first one – having finally tied with Sasuke in their recent exams, and the second – the approval of her personal project. There was also a third reason, but she was unresolved of what to feel.

Kakashi met with her alone after their monthly council meeting. It was the usual talk, the heavy administrative concerns they do not bother other council members with, reminders about problematic behaviors among the student body or personal problems that faculty or students were plagued with that needed intervention. He said an apology just as she reached the door.

“Sakura?” Kakashi asked, turning in his chair.

She looked back at him with a neutral expression. While she knew she wasn’t overtly passive aggressive in her actions, he might have noticed a change in her cheerful disposition towards him. Her clumped fingers anxiously fidgeted with the rubber band on her wrist, his rubber band that she didn’t use anymore to tie her hair. “Yes, sensei?”

“Were you offended with what I said during the school trip?” he asked, but his expression already seemed to know the answer.

Her eyes downcast, she turned the knob of the door, knowing that she was free to leave without replying, but as the door stayed ajar, she decided to come clean. “Yes.”

“I thought as much. I’m aware that I belittled you like a child. Your money is yours to spend however you want. Please know that I only have good intentions with what I’ve done,” her sensei told her. “But isn’t it also unfair for you to shoulder that much problem? I’m a paid employee and before that, I am your adviser. I have a responsibility just as much as you do. Next time you are presented with that, learn to ask for help.”

Sakura didn’t see the expression he had on his face. She was too flustered to compose a comeback and she can only settle for a meek nod before shooting out of the room like her tail was on fire.

“Girlie!” Her coworker’s voice brought her back to reality – a reality of a long queue of customers waiting for their to-go coffees, mini-cakes, and boxes of pastries to share with loved ones in this cold night while she’ll be likely stuck in shift well past beyond midnight, tolerating the café uniform, the itch of her black weave on her scalp, and the heavy makeup she wore for tonight. She flashed an apologetic (yet charming) smile to the other person, and they gave her a thumbs up.

The queue has thinned out by eleven, to be replaced soon by stragglers hoping to catch a last dose of caffeine pump. She stretched her neck and stifled a yawn, forgetting to say Welcome to a customer that walked through their doors.

“Your sweetest drink please and a half dozen of hazelnut cookies,” the customer said. “Thanks, Sakura.”

She almost broke her already strained neck when she raised it up quickly to meet the owner of the voice. No gel blonde hair Naruto with black circles under his eyes. Rookie MVP looked shit as hell.

She barely formed an excuse in her head when he waved his hand in front of her. “You can drop the act with me. I already knew the week you got discharged from the hospital. I just passed by after dinner with the team when I saw a girl manning the cashier with the same band-aid on her nose which I gave you a day before.” Naruto grinned at her in the off chance that it would reassure her.

“Will this be to-go?” Sakura asked as she busied herself with Naruto’s order, unsettled with her carelessness. At the back of her mind, she was yet to answer herself why she was adamant to use a disguise while working.

“For here. Apartment’s kinda bare during these times.”

As what she expected, Naruto was still seated when they were about to close, and ironically, he chose the corner table with no windows, contrary to what his other friend would have chosen. Like those usual nights with Sasuke, she slid in front of him, her disguise gone.

“Let’s go see the amusement park tomorrow?” It was as if she saw sadness being lifted from his shoulders the way they transitioned from slouching to an alert stance.

She found then that Naruto was always that person that found happiness at the simplest things.

--------------------------------

“A horror house!” Naruto pointed at the very moment they stepped inside the park. He somehow absorbed his captain’s fashion persona, undercut prominent with his baseball cap, loose plain black shirt, and gray cargo pants.

“All right. Treat me if we reach the other end with you clinging to my arm,” Sakura teased. She was dressed in a mauve smocked crop top with high rise flared jeans and platform white sneakers that allowed her to reach Naruto’s shoulders. She wondered if her getup was too much what with the number of heads that turned her way as she littered in the entrance earlier.

Sasuke begged off through their group chat, saying he was unavailable. He was yet to explain that group hug last time, but he was evasive every time Naruto brought it up while she simply cannot find the right timing.

She guessed she was still taken aback by how warm his hold felt like. If she was right, whatever defenses he had around them were toppled down by himself that day. But what triggered it – she’d probably never know.

Naruto placed a fist on his chest. “This is one bet I’ll never lose.”

And he lost – spectacularly. His baseball cap was long gone thanks to a zombie who panicked when he almost punched it. He was also hyperventilating and sweating out of his wits, his throat may have gone hoarse by now with all his screaming inside.

Sakura cannot get rid of the long string of laughter that bubbled. “Come on, let’s cool off for a while.”

To help calm Naruto down, they had to line up with all the other kids in the merry-go-round, then off to paddle a swan boat on a manmade lake. She went all out in the shooting range and won Naruto a frog plushie while he blitzed through the basketball hoops, sneering at the kids beside him who were waiting for their turns.

They capped off the afternoon with a ride on the ferris wheel. They sat opposite each other, and Sakura suddenly felt queasy. She remembered she was apparently acrophobic, and so she focused instead on Naruto who was still in awe of the scenery. The park had a busy crowd today – it was the holiday season after all and families, friends, and lovers were up and about. She just hoped Naruto didn’t catch on yet.

“So why are you stuck with me instead of your family, Sakura?”

Ah he caught on. “They’re busy,” she simply replied. “Besides I’ll see them later in the evening.”

Naruto smiled at her, a smile that knew she was hiding more but he chose not to prod further. Sakura silently conveyed her thanks.

“I don’t know how to thank you. I was really in a slump when we lost, but this day made me recharge my drive and gave me a newfound resolve. You, Pres, is the first to hear it!”

Sakura can only grin, urging him to go on.

“I will bring our school team to the nationals and we will win.”

Sakura clapped her hands and gave him a thumbs up. “Of course, you will. I know you’ll do it.”

“I just wish I told Captain Haru before he left town for vacation.” Naruto slid lower in his seat. “Apparently, he and Hinata broke up. You’re friends with both of them, right?”

Sakura shook her head, shock at the news. She had an inkling from her previous conversation with Haru, but she didn’t expect it would come this early. “I am, but I haven’t really heard from both parties lately.”

“Well, Hinata’s father offered an athletic scholarship to Cap, but he turned it down, saying he was undeserving, and it might just be because of Hinata’s prodding.”

If she recalled correctly, Hiashi Hyuuga was the chair of the Sports Council that spanned all districts of their state. She could see why Haru was angry and disappointed enough to break it off with Hinata. “But they were so good together. Did he ever tell you how they first met?”

Naruto rubbed his hands together and leaned forward. “Do tell please!”

“There was a student exchange of some sort and Hinata ended up in our class for a month. Of course, she was the takane no hana and this immediately gathered a bandwagon group of shallow admirers. Haru, oh Haru, he found pretty people depth-less, but he was the class representative that time – “

“And you were?”

“Of course, a student council president. But wait pay attention Naruto!”

“Okay I am paying attention! But you really are an overachiever!”

“Yeah and what about it!” Sakura almost chuckled in exasperation. “So anyway, he had to escort Hinata back and forth at the school gates because of the unreasonable crowd. He would ask her random things, but most especially on archery since he was so bad at it. And they found a common ground and the topics expanded beyond the arrow and bow. The guy had the nerve to cover it up from me at first, saying they’re fake dating and it was just an arrangement to keep creeps at bay.” She sighed, suddenly saddened by the breakup. “I thought it would last forever.”

“But Hinata never introduced him to her family, did she?” Naruto asked. “Because Cap also told me that when Hiashi called him up for the offer, he didn’t know he was the boyfriend, he was simply a person her friend referred.”

Oh Haru. You must have known what family you were entering when you loved her.

“Hey? Time to get down,” the operator said. Their turn was already finished.

As they walked to the gates, Naruto asked her. “Love is too scary. You’ll never know if you’ll end up hurt or happy despite everything. Besides, can you even say it’ll be worth fighting for?”

Sakura’s fingers immediately went to the rubber band on her wrist, “It’s always a mix of everything, all the good and the bad, and somehow it’s all convoluted into one hodgepodge of memories that will be a part of you forever. It’s your decision what you want to do with it, and in between all of those, you’ll know. Like one big realization in your head that lights up like fireworks and splayed in big capital letters.”

Her eyes met Naruto’s gaze and his eyes slightly widened at her response.

“I talk vague, don’t I?”

“Not at all,” he replied.

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January couldn’t come fast enough, and Itachi was out of the country just as quickly as he entered his apartment unannounced on Christmas Eve. A holiday break, he said, but if he wasn’t annoyingly checking up on him in the evenings, he was otherwise holed up in his hotel. The truth was, he had a conference and a simultaneous workshop with the state hospital. Sasuke was just a side trip, an obligation that his brother didn’t want to take care of.

He could have told him about Naruto and Sakura and how he now knew all the technicalities of baseball because of the former and that he can consider calling them as friends, but their brotherly bond was too frayed to bridge all of those thoughts.

It was a week before the start of the spring term, and he found himself re-reading Naruto’s texts over and over again.

Grumpy.

So how was your date?

AHHHHH SO IT WAS A DATE. I NOW FEEL SO SHY.

Idiot.

SHE LOOKED SO BEAUTIFUL IN HER GETUP.

Yeah as if you two didn’t already spam the group chat with your pictures.

HEY AT LEAST WE EDITED YOU IN.

Why are you typing in all caps? Your phone broken?

GRUMPPPPPPYYYYY. Grumpy, I have something to tell you. I think I like Sakura – not the ‘like’ like others have for her. It just came to me, like fireworks in big capital letters. I LIKE HER.

Sasuke wasn’t able to reply. He didn’t know what to reply or what to feel, really. These recent nights, his mind only brought him to the first moment he saw her in the café, and there was an unfamiliar pang he couldn’t name.

Then, suddenly he was in front of her in the café itself, ordering an iced americano and bruschetta with tomato and basil. Her eyes lit up in recognition; today she wore her black hair in low pigtails and a light dab of tint on her cheeks and lips.

She sat across him when it was her break time, cheery and still in disguise, the winter cold making the blush even more prominent. “I’m gonna bounce some ideas to you.”

Sasuke kept mum, relishing the sacred combination of tomato and basil in his mouth, but let his stare level with hers.

“The school board approved my personal project. I proposed to set up a mental health committee since our infirmary – get this – and guidance office don’t actually have a psychiatrist. The school will be asking a medical professional to come in for monthly guidance counseling and will be an official partner for outpatient concerns.” With her face on her palm, she leaned forward, seemingly surveying Sasuke’s minute expressions.

“That’s tricky,” he remarked. “How will you encourage them though?”

“I think just the mere availability and accessibility of it is enough to encourage students.”

“Hmm.” He took a sip of his coffee.

“Aren’t you gonna ask me why I did it?”

Sasuke knew that he already broke his resolve to remain uninvolved in the remaining years of his life here in this town. He knew that sometime ago, the walls he built up since the accident broke down in the constant presence of her and the blonde idiot. But in spite of, he knew that there was another layer of wall that withstood the recent onslaught. Unfortunately, something has started to leak from its crevices. Something that made him understand the overwhelming emotions that raged behind such walls.

He missed having her all to himself, like a little secret, a safe abode he could always retreat to – her with her black hair and makeup, her with her bouts of vulnerabilities laid out in front of him in rare moments, her with her emerald eyes and tufts of rose hair that peak from the weave, her in this table in front of him and the world outside divided by a glass window.

If he could name it, it was a feeling of loss, a loss he stole and a loss he never had the privilege of feeling in the first place.

“Because you’re a good person and you always think of others,” Sasuke started, still holding her gaze. “And I think you want it because you might need it more.”

Sakura was the first to break off. She soon excused herself and resumed her shift. By the time Sasuke finished his coffee and bread, it was almost closing time. His words may have struck a chord so he decided not to wait for her. Maybe he’ll talk it through with her next time, if she allowed him to. He was almost out of the doors when the new pair of customers passed by.

A glint of silver hair.

“Oh, hello there Sakura.”

And a brunette on his arm.

Sasuke never saw color drain as quickly as the blush did from Sakura’s face.

AO3 LINK | NEXT CHAPTER | CHAPTER 8

#SCPS #student council president sakura #sasusaku #narusaku #kakasaku #uchiha sasuke #haruno sakura #uzumaki naruto #hatake kakashi #team 7 #lots of narusaku in this one hihi

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wakraya · 4 years ago

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people getting soooo up in arms about transmasc rox is just like (that guy from the office slapping his forehead) if people really wanna go all the way fighting over which trans rep is more oppressed isn't transmasc rox the only confirmed transmasc at least in the human cast ? [insert line break here] it kinds reminds me of the joke rolling situation when people rightfully pointed out that trans men were casted out of conversations of support entirely even though her nonsense hurt them as well

it's like. shit is confusing so i really try not to get mad at people for being ignorant on some terms but hoooooly shit to actually attack actual lgbt people over things that could easily be talked over or interpreted differently it's just so. it's infuriating but at the same time i'm sad that so many people are so bound to their echo chamber that they just exist to oppose anything that isn't completely aligned to their liking, dangerously close to actual bigotry

Don’t be fooled, “dangerously close to actual bigotry”, this kind of thinking is often sneakily stoked by actual bigots trying to pit the community against each other to watch us cannibalize each other like this, so if any talking points seem similar, I assure you it’s not just an uncanny coincidence. And don’t be fooled either, this is not just a Homestuck Fandom Problem, and you WILL find similar discourse with similar roots for practically any large Fandom with a large LGBT+ community, and/or canon rep in the actual series.

I think I’m gonna stop with the discourse here for today, at least for now since this is the last ask I’ve gotten about this stuff, but like. Sigh. I get it? I REALLY do get it. Queer Creators often cannot express themselves fully in Mainstream Media, so since a lot of this stuff has to be in smaller projects, they can also take bigger risks than the usual, and often since their takes come from very personal places, they can touch really sensitive topics. People consuming what they make are more primed to negativity because they’re used to rep falling short in other places and being tarnished, so anything other than Good And Perfectly Handled Rep suddenly is seen suspiciously. Pair with that the climate of hate-consumption, reactionary stuff without digging further into it, unsourced claims or short posts, specially on Twitter, and a decentralization of Fandom away from dedicated Spaces, and into Social Media, and you have a cocktail for this kinda stuff to happen, and it just saddens me. It saddens me to see creators hurt because of this, it saddens me to see the community so willing to break apart for what ultimately is minor and fictitious, and often not even true. As a pansexual trans woman who’s a part of the community AND who wants to be a creator myself, I’ve seen this behavior cast away other queer fans who actually relate to the content produced, and having them be afraid to even voice their opinion, and I’ve seen other people interested in creating their own works concerned about Fandom Reaction, despite them also being part of the community and wanting to share their own experiences and likes to people like them.

I’m not going to say “Just be friends, dammit!” because I know it’s not just that, and it’d be disingenuous to think you can just, forget this stuff in a day and “ignore it, lol”, at best, or dismissive and harmful at worst, but this is REALLY something that we all as a community have to work towards changing. It’s SO easy to be critical and come up with the worst possible reads of canon content and authorial intention, and to fall into the bandwagon of hate. You can twist practically anything into being negative and bad. Let’s try to also be critical of the unchecked hate and not let it fester until racists and transphobes feel comfortable enough to join these cries of ‘it is bad’ and use the Fandom Climate to attack people. I think everyone would agree about Harassment and Death Threats being bad, and Transphobes and Racists and Misogynists having no fucking place in any Fandom, right.

#Racism #Transphobia #Queerphobia #Discourse #Fandom #HS^2 #Homestuck^2 #Roxy

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mariaiscrafting · 4 years ago

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Lol for some reason I got a post defending Q and Karl in my Tumblr recommended, why ?? Not gonna fight them on it just because people seem very set on defending their favorite CCs and also don't seem to fully understand just how COVID contagion, risk assessment, or bandwagon effect work, and I don't really want to put in the effort to explain all of that, but just... 🤷🏽‍♀️ it's kinda just like, a) you don't have to waste your time attempting to defend two rich, privileged men lmao, and b) you can make all the logical reaches you need to rationalize your and your faves' behavior to make yourself not feel guilty, but that's not going to change the fact that these are unnecessary measures not free of risk that are going to impact people's lives without you even knowing. I'm sorry, but no matter how much you try to rationalize it to yourself, you meeting up with people in ways that are not as risk-free as possible is going to put others in danger, and you have to live with that. You pretending it's not, that oh, I wore a mask and took a test, so I can go see my friend all the time during a pandemic, is not going to change reality.

#/neg #discourse #.txt #covid #covid-19

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thatbookgirl1118 · 4 years ago

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Aight y'all.

I keep seeing these Snape hate posts, and it's driving me nuts. I think a lot of people are just jumping on the bandwagon because of the disgusting things JK's been saying lately, and while I agree that she's being terrible, it doesn't have anything to do with Snape and I don't think that warrants condensing this man's entire complex, conflicting background into "guy got friend-zoned and didn't leave her alone."

So here's why Snape is not the horrible character y'all been making him out to be lately:

Number one. Lily. One of the favorite reasons for why Snape is terrible is that he's a 'creepy stalker' and wouldn't leave Lily alone.

Let's take a look at the facts.

Lily and Snape met when they were, like, eight. They were the only people who understood each other, and Snape was the one person Lily could go to when Petunia was being a royal biatch. They were BEST FRIENDS.

Then they go to Hogwarts, and they're sorted into different houses. Not just different, OPPOSITE. SLYTHERIN AND GRYFFINDOR. And you know what happened? NOTHING. LITERALLY. NOTHING. THEY STAYED FRIENDS. Yes, it was a bit of a strain, especially once Lily and James became friends, but in reality the cause of their falling out had nothing to do with her being a Gryffindor. And before she became friends with James, let's remember: she HATED him. VEHEMENTLY. And Snape agreed, especially considering he was FREAKING BULLIED BY HIM. James was a good person at heart, and he did a lot of good things, but let's please not forget that he made mistakes, too. It doesn't discount the good things about him, it makes him human, and let's please remember that THAT'S KINDA THE WHOLE POINT OF THE SERIES. So how things stand: Snape and Lily are inter-house friends, James is an ass. (Also, part of the reason Snape hated James initially was that he liked Lily, and so did Snape. The difference, of course, was that James was a complete ass to everyone INCLUDING Lily, and Snape was her best friend.) Then Snape starts falling in with the wrong crowd. And his friendship with Lily becomes a liability, because she's both a Gryffindor and, far more importantly, Muggleborn.

Now. I'm NOT saying that everything Snape did was okay. A lot of it was disgusting and despicable and generally horrible. But again. He's HUMAN. He's kinda the biggest grey area on earth, and that makes him HUMAN.

So, one day, when James is, as usual, being a complete ass, Lily stands up for Snape. And he's feeling scared, and embarrassed, and weak, and all the other things VICTIMS OF BULLYING tend to feel, and the girl he likes just stood up for him. Which had to hurt, because Snape wants her to see him as a protector, because he likes her, but she just saved HIM. Add this to all the conflicting emotions he must be having about the future Death Eaters he's hanging out with, and his desire to both have and protect Lily, and he's basically a ticking time bomb. And he explodes. And calls Lily a mudblood.

Major wtf is wrong w u moment.

But that's the point. He SCREWS UP. Because he's HUMAN.

At this point, Snape knows he's gone too far. He probably could've salvaged the relationship, and he probably knew that somewhere in his heart, but he was probably mostly feeling horrified and sick to his stomach and had also, lets remember, kinda convinced himself that Lily liked James and she could never be his. He didn't feel worthy of her. So he decides to distance himself from her, because he knows he's getting mixed up with the wrong people, but it's what everyone expects from him. But she doesn't belong there, and he wants to protect her (also one of the main reasons he probably got involved with these people in the first place, to try and protect her), so he tells her to stay away from him.

Now, if I remember correctly (I could be completely wrong because it's been a bit since I read the last book, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong), Lily didn't actually stop. I'm pretty sure she tried to talk to him several more times after the incident. That's not the behavior a victim of stalking and abuse would exhibit, don't ya think? But even if this didn't happen, I think we've made a firm case for them being CLOSE FRIENDS. Honestly I wouldn't blame her for immediately abandoning his dumb butt after what he said to her.

So fast forward a bit. Lily marries James, and Snape joins Lord Voldemort. Then he hears the prophecy Trelawney gives, and not knowing who it pertains to, tells Voldemort. Voldemort then becomes convinced that it means Harry.

Now, Snape has not only just discovered that the love of his life is about to be killed, but that it was HIS FAULT. He told Voldemort about the prophecy. So he goes to Dumbledore and literally BEGS him to hide Lily. In return he turns traitor to the Death Eaters and risks his life over and over, all for the arbitrary promise he's been made that Lily and her family will be protected. AND HER FAMILY. HE DIDN'T PULL THE THING WHERE HE ONLY SAVES HER AND LETS THE REST OF THEM DIE HE SAVES ALL OF THEM BECAUSE HE KNOWS LILY DOESN'T LOVE HIM BUT HE. STILL. LOVES. HER. AND HE WANTS HER TO BE HAPPY AND SAFE EVEN IF IT ISN'T WITH HIM. Y'ALL THAT'S THE EXACT DEFINITION OF TRUE LOVE YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME.

And then, after all that, Lily DIES. As does James, and while he may have been Snape's rival, I think we've established that Snape is human, and that had to hurt if only because he was the man Lily loved and the father of her child.

And after all this, after risking his life for a promise that wasn't even kept, do you know what he did?

He stayed and helped Dumbledore. He was one of the main reasons Harry was able to defeat Voldemort. Yes, in the beginning, it was probably just a convenient way to avoid Azkaban. But he did what Dumbledore instructed EVEN AFTER THE MAN WAS DEAD. He could've easily killed Dumbledore and then joined Voldemort for real, but he helped Harry instead, because he was still atoning for what happened to Lily.

And speaking of Harry, let's talk about that relationship. From even a conceptual standpoint, before they ever met, think about what this boy represents to Snape. He's Lily's son, yes, but because of that he's a constant reminder of her and everything that happened with her. He's also James' son, Snape's bully and the man who got Lily. And to top it all off, he's the REASON SHE'S DEAD. If it weren't for him and the prophecy, she'd still be alive. Now, these are not things that are okay to think about an innocent child. I'm not saying he was justified in treating Harry like shit. In fact, I loathed Snape with my entire soul for the first 6 books. I'm saying LOOK AT THE FACTS. Snape is not a normal person. He's a Death Eater, who's done and seen terrible things, and only switched to the right side because of Lily. So he's not going to think to himself, "this isn't this innocent child's fault." Hell, even if he did, he's not going to take it into account when he interacts with the kid. And on top of it all, as is said several times, Harry is INCREDIBLY like his father. He looks like him, talks like him, and has a penchant for getting into trouble. So when he clashes with Snape (and honestly I think even if they didn't have a history these two would've clashed, they're just too different), Snape takes it personally and treats Harry like shit. AND YET. First year, when Quirrel tries to kill Harry, who saves him? Snape. Third year, when Lupin transforms into a werewolf (and Snape's been making his potion all year and whether Dumbledore forced him or not, let's remember that Lupin was a Marauder and while he probably didn't take direct part in the bullying, he certainly didn't DO anything about it, so frankly it's a miracle Snape didn't poison him), his first instinct is to protect the children - and frankly I think that would've been his first instinct no matter who those kids were, because regardless of the terrible things he's done, Snape is first and foremost a teacher. Fifth year, while he didn't do anything to help the kids directly, he takes the warning Harry gives him (they've got Padfoot at the place where it's hidden) and sends the Order after the kids. I don't think it's ever directly stated that it was him, but how else could the Order know they were there? ALSO. I'M NOT GLOSSING OVER ALL THE SERIOUSLY HORRIBLE THINGS SNAPE DID FIFTH YEAR. But he DID send the Order, so let's give credit where credit's due. He also gives Harry Occlumency lessons, which he made exceedingly unpleasant but he was still trying to protect Harry. Sixth year he hurts Harry in about a billion ways, but to be fair the majority of those ways were ordered by Dumbledore (I have a separate rant on why he's not a bad character either but this essay is long enough). He also tries to protect Malfoy this year, yes on both Dumbledore and his mother's orders, but Snape does recognize that he's just a child and shouldn't have to do something like this.

Now. Seventh year. Snape does a lot of really horrible things this year. Yeah, he does them because he needs Voldemort to trust him so he can bring him down, but that doesn't excuse them. I'm not going to unpack all those things here, because this is already really long, but I'm NOT just ignoring them. Actually I think that they're pretty important to his development, and how he loses himself a bit. But let's look at the two moments that really show the good in him.

Number one. He refused to fight McGonagall. This woman has not only been his colleague for many years, she was his TEACHER. He's known her since he was 11. She's witnessed everything he's gone through, every choice he's made, good and bad, and even not knowing all the reasons and details she STILL forgave him. She treated him with respect, as a fellow teacher. She TRUSTED him, and as far as she knows, he betrayed that trust. That HAD to hurt, knowing she thought he was a bad guy. So in his final interaction with her, when she attacks him to keep him from Harry, he doesn't fight. He can't tell her he's on her side, because he still has a job to do, but he just deflects her spells. His refusal to fight her is the last good piece of him, fighting its way out.

The second time was, of course, his final moments with Harry. After everything he's done to him, after the years of abuse and killing Dumbledore in front of his eyes, Harry still feels pain when he realizes Snape is about to die. He still feels the need to talk to Snape in his final moments, to carry out his final request (to take the memories to the pensieve). This is personally one of my favorite Harry moments, because it shows just how good and kind he is, that he even feels pity for a man he hates and doesn't even know why. But let's take a look at Snape. He's literally dying, but his first reaction to seeing Harry is to give him the memories, so he can defeat Voldemort. He is, to the very end, loyal to Dumbledore. And his second thought - his last - is Lily. He asks Harry to look at him, so that he might see Lily's eyes one last time, even if they're not really hers. His last thought on this earth was of her, and if that isn't love, I don't know what the hell is.

The point of all this is, Snape is human. He isn't necessarily a good person, but he isn't necessarily and a bad one either. Even as a child, he was never as kind as Lily, but she made him kinder. The time when he lost his way the most was when she stopped being there to keep him good. He thought she was happy without him, so he didn't think he mattered, and he did some pretty horrible things. People go dark when they think they don't matter. That was the entire reason for Voldemort's thirst for power. And when he realized she was in danger, and there was something he could do, he did it. Immediately. Without hesitation. He joined the good side and risked his life for the chance that Dumbledore would protect her and her family, even knowing that she'd never know what he was doing. He didn't do it to "get the girl." He did it to save the girl, to let her be happy. And when she died anyway, he spent the next 16 years trying to bring Voldemort down, and let's be honest, he probably didn't do it because it was "the right thing." He did it because it was what Lily would've wanted. He did it to honor her memory, and to protect her son. Snape wasn't some creepy stalker who got rejected and turned bitter. He fell in love with his best friend and spent his entire life trying to protect her and keep her happy, and then trying to honor her memory. He was a man entirely motivated by love, and honestly, I don't know what's more beautiful than that.

#this is really long #but i feel strongly about this #snape is complicated #but he loved Lily #his story is beautiful because it's complicated #harry potter #potterverse #book characters #fictional characters #book rant #fantasy #character development #lily potter #severus snape #pro snape

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delightfullygrace · 4 years ago

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The Enneatypes Playing Among Us

Type 1 — As a crew member, they’re the first to finish their tasks and will get upset if they’re interrupted by an emergency meeting. Will avoid voting anyone without reason. As an imposter, they only kill when they’re 100% certain no one will see them; mainly stay quiet in chat and avoid outright lying, but will point out when others are “acting sus.” Won’t support theories that say their fellow imposter should be voted off and may skip to avoid throwing them under the bus.

Type 2 — As a crew member, they pick someone and follow them around, both for safety in numbers and so they can vouch for them when they see them complete a visual task. They try to make sure everyone has a chance to speak in emergency meetings. As an imposter, they overthink every decision because they’re afraid they’ll get caught, so they mostly end up sabotaging. They use vents sparingly. They’re great with double kills, especially if their fellow imposter takes the initiative. They naturally end up flocking in crowds, so they avoid suspicion there.

Type 3 — As a crew member, they’re both completing their tasks as quickly as possible and watching everyone to see who’s sus. When in a meeting, they’re the first to accuse anyone and will wholeheartedly fight for them to be voted off. Probably won’t say much if they were wrong about it; they just immediately move on to try and find who the imposter actually is. As an imposter, they’re very quick. They use venting and sabotaging to their advantage and will work while walking. When in a meeting, they’ll pick someone to actively accuse and will avoid any suspicion being put on them by throwing someone else under the bus every time (including fellow imposters, if people seem to be catching on). People usually believe them.

Type 4 — As a crew member, they’re disappointed that they don’t get to be the imposter. They have a balance of watching other people, completing tasks, and running around. They may call an emergency meeting if they’re being chased or they believe they know who the imposter is, but they’re not the type to abuse the button. They’ll share their own opinions during meetings, but don’t usually actively accuse others nor demand everyone listen to them. They just want to be sure their thoughts are heard. As an imposter, they may jokingly call people sus, but won’t outright demand someone be voted off. They’ll just share that they’re going to vote for someone (with hopes that you’ll follow suit.) They enjoy having a unique role, so they may not always fake tasks; they may just run around from room to room, killing people when the mood hits and jumping into the vent to get away. They don’t take their fellow imposter into account too much; they won’t throw them under the bus, but they won’t defend them either. Very much of an independent killer.

Type 5 — As a crew member, they’re pretty quiet, usually connecting the dots right off the bat and trying to find the imposter. They don’t speak up immediately, usually waiting until they’ve acquired enough evidence to accuse someone. If they’re really sure someone is imposter, they will probably call their teammates dumb for not listening to them. They do their tasks as they pass them, but mostly focus on watching the cams and the map. As an imposter, they try to frame people as solidly as possible. Like to turn out the lights often. They rely on vent kills when two people are standing near each other, both completing a task so they can’t see the room around them; whichever one didn’t die looks sus af. They will point that out during an emergency meeting as well. Won’t try to defend their fellow imposter, but won’t try to accuse them either. If fellow imposter looks suspicious, they’ll play that to their advantage to get eyes off themselves.

Type 6 — As a crew member, they find inconsistencies with people’s stories during meetings and point them out. They’re highly suspicious of everyone, so they actively look for people to trust rather than the imposter specifically. They look for opportunities to watch someone complete a visual task and immediately let everyone know “[insert color here] is safe.” They also point out when someone would’ve had the perfect opportunity to kill them, but didn’t, “so they must be crew.” Of course, they complete their tasks diligently as well. As an imposter, they try to form a band of people who trust them by using the same aforementioned tactics, letting people know who’s safe. Being protected by them makes people want to protect them in return, so they’ll be actively defended for most of the game. When it’s down to the last few people, they’ll throw their defenders under the bus and act betrayed, “I don’t want to believe it, but it has to be [this color.] That was just way too sus. Dang, I really trusted you.” Their killing method is to off their allies and frame people who suspected them. They use sabotaging to their advantage, but not overly so. They don’t vent too often; it doesn’t make for good alibies.

Type 7 — As a crew member, they switch between running around aimlessly, actually completing tasks, and just watching other people. If they get bored and no one’s died yet, they may hit the panic button just to tell the imposters to “make something happen.” They may have some fun with chat during emergency meetings; calling people sus for no reason, asking how everyone’s doing, etc. Don’t like to actively accuse anyone, but if someone convinces them, they’ll be like “Ohhhh tru. Guys, vote [this color.]” 5s and 6s may easily take advantage of the trusting 7. As an imposter, they try to do a good job with framing people, shifting blame, and killing properly, but if the game’s going too slow or there aren’t enough opportunities to kill, then they may pull off some riskier moves. That is, killing someone right in front of someone else, then reporting the body and saying that person did it, or jumping into a big cluster of people (like at cams) and killing one so they know it has to be someone in that cluster, but who? Everyone definitely forgets who was in that group, so suspicion is eventually shaken. They just like interesting games. Regardless of role, they may go to lights and flick off the switches as people try to fix them.

Type 8 — As a crew member, they may occasionally forget to actually do their tasks, instead running around trying to find anyone who’s acting sus. Will absolutely call an emergency meeting if someone seems to be following someone else or is standing still when a sabotage happens. Will accuse that person actively until they’re voted off. They just wanna keep their crew safe; if they don’t believe you’re a crew member, you’re screwed. As an imposter, they can be kinda reckless. They actively sabotage and run around killing as many people as possible. The game maybe over by the time you realize anyone even died; they’re quick, especially if they have a fellow imposter they feel can rely on. They will not throw them under the bus as long as they can help it. They’d pair well with Type 2s, as they’re the type to take the initiative for a double kill and they give Type 2 the opportunity to kill while they’re sabotaging. Very attentive to what their fellow imposter is doing.

Type 9 — As a crew member, they tend to be pretty relaxed; they complete their tasks as needed then go watch cams or sit in waiting for the imposter to see them. If someone comes close, they’ll run away and point out the sus behavior when given opportunity. During emergency meetings, they don’t say much unless they’re called on by someone else or they believe they know who the imposter is. As an imposter, they act similarly to when they’re crew, but will slip in a kill when they see an opportunity. Don’t really try to frame people, but definitely hop on the bandwagon when someone else is accused. Not big on sabotaging, but may turn out the lights or shut the doors from time to time. May hang out in the vents for awhile.

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100-yardstare · 4 years ago

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3? Always love a good rant 😊

3. rant. just do it

Oh shit, you wanna let me go off? Prepare yourself!!! (Remember kids, Tumblr does not replace therapy!!)

This post will also be a good opportunity for me to update my followers on what the hell has happened to me over the last year. So as Mario would say... HERE WE GOOOO

Okay so most of y’all might already know this story, but it impacted me a lot and I still get angry about it. I graduated from university after a shitload of trials and setbacks due to my adhd among other things, but I managed to push through academia and graduate with a bachelor of science in psychology. With this I had plans to stay in my field, but I also was an absolute idiot and had no idea what I was doing when it came to choosing. I just kinda picked job adds that suited a psychology degree and that’s it. I was desperate to find a job, as all recent graduates are.

Fast forward a few months, I land an interview with an organization I would come to refer as “the hellscape”. It was an ABA clinic. I wish I knew what that was before I took the job, because what you read about from actual autistic adults and their trauma is 100% true, and I am FURIOUS practitioners and insurance companies even promote it. I later found out the CEO wasn’t even a therapist, let alone held a degree in psychology, behavioral studies, or WHATEVER and was actually a fucking tattoo artist who jumped on the ABA bandwagon for money, but that’s another story.

So I was a newbie right out of college with no prior experience working in this field, and they hire me. That should have been an instant red flag. Their “training” was less than a three month thing, and if you didn’t make it three months, or they didn’t like you... YOU GOT FIRED. Guess what happened to me?? I got fired!!

Why? At first I thought it was because I wasn’t a good learner. Years of being in college pumped the idea into my psyche that I was a dumbass because of my ADHD, so I thought I was just an idiot. I came home from this place actually having traumatic based ptsd breakdowns (the BAD kind) because not only was I exposing myself to my phobias (*ahem* vomiting) but I was being told to ABUSE KIDS!! I got fired because I didn’t want to do what they wanted me to do!!! I could go into all the details, but if you want to ask me in a private message you can. To put it simply it was HORRIBLE, and I cry to this day what ABA does to kids. I don’t even want to hear people say shit like “not all ABA” because not only do these places guilt trip you into getting your kid and taking your money, but what they are doing is literally causing kids to grow up with ptsd!!! If you tell me “but kailey, it’s scientifically based” I’d say fuck off and reply “it’s also scientifically been shown that kids who are put in ABA therapy are at HIGH RISK of developing ptsd, and being abuse victims!”

The spring of 2019 was understandingly the WORST experience of my life, and from my wisdom I implore any of you going to college, whose about to graduate, to deeply research not only the company you are applying for, but what they do. The only lesson I got out of working there was that “normal” people hate autistic kids, and in extension adhd kids. They hate people like me. We are things that need to be “fixed” because our stems, hyperfixations, special interests etc. are “weird”. Absolutely no job is worth your mental health, and morals.

After this I went on for the next year and a half looking for another fulltime job. I thought because I got fired I would never be able to make anything of myself. The rest of 2019 sent me into a bad depression, which I’m still struggling with. It wasn’t until December of 2019 that I got an interview with Girl Scouts. I worked as a grunt, 10 dollars an hour, part-time outreach worker for 8 months from there, going to middle and high schools to talk to girls not only about girl scouts, but the importance of sisterhood, acceptance, love, mental health, physical health, and much more. My boss ended up being the kindest woman I’ve ever met professionally, and when the pandemic happened, and the outreach staff got laid off, she sent my name up to HR, and I got promoted as a Volunteer Manager, who oversees over 4 communities in the southern-Houston area, consisting of over well over 800 troop leaders, and community leader volunteers. I make a decent salary, and am getting benefits soon.

I absolutely believe that I went through all that shit so my eyes would be opened, and not only could I be a better ADHD ally to autistic individuals, but use my desire to help people of all backgrounds into opportunities that could potentially change their lives for the good. I have only been working as a manager for GS since early June, but I feel welcomed, supported, and appreciated by my coworkers, boss, and director of Volunteer Experience. On top of it, they care about our health, and I’m working from home. I was given a laptop and everything!

Things do turn around. It might not be how you imagined, but it will turn out how you need.

Send me an unusual(ish) ask <3

#thanks for letting me rant!!!#ask #rant #kailey speaks

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missnxthingg · 4 years ago

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Well they said TCR would be an anthology series and the definition kinda made it harder to explain but I guess it’s more poetic in a sense? Someone explain this better.

Also I really hate cancel culture. I know some people think “well it works in the case of the royal family,” yeah I can see that but say someone did something like use an offensive term one time but they don’t use it today because they understand it’s wrong. Well with cancel culture people will obsessively dig up dirt and pull up the tweet from 20 years ago and next thing you know that person’s canceled and they have to make a whole ass apology over something they don’t do anymore.

Humans are not perfect beings, we screw up all the time. I understand calling out someone who still uses harmful behavior present day like some talk show hosts asking inappropriate questions for a reaction. But there’s calling out someone on nothing only to shatter the image they’ve built. Tom is, in my opinion an incredibly sweet and kind man and anyone should be so lucky to have someone like him in their personal lives. With the news of TCR people with DID are understandably offended because of this type of representation and by articles using the wrong term, but why attack Tom? Well he’s a man, he’s white and he’s rich in money and with power as an exec in this series. We know he’s proven to be more than that but that’s what followers of cancel culture want to reduce him to.

I mean who would you side with if you were someone just wanting to jump on this bandwagon: a group of people with mental health issues who’ve been misinterpreted as killers because of past media or a rich white man?

i think cancel culture is so so so valid when it is taken seriously. for example, when tyler joseph from twenty one pilots made fun of the blm movement. i am still so upset about it that i can't listen to a song by tøp (a band that used to mean so much to me) without feeling guilty. but sometimes i think people are just trying to find something in a place where there's nothing to take. we've all made mistakes and we still do. we just need to compromise on listening and learning.

i'm telling this because i've been through an experience myself where something i said was misinterpreted and a lot of people from my classroom started to hate me out of nowhere without even pointing my mistake out to help me change. that's where gossips come from and it left me heartbroken because it was something so small that i could've easily acknowledge, apologized and learned, but i ended up losing friends because of that.

about TCR: i wasn't thinking from the perspective of people with DID and i deeply apologize. maybe that is kind of problematic, but it won't make tom drop the project. we just need to hope and pray they be respectful about it and actually do their homework (researchhhh). tom is such a sweet guy and i think that he didn't think from the perspective that it might hurt some people - just like i didn't before. i think he just needs to learn and listen some more

#our boy has a good heart #let's just calm down and see where this is taking us #ask #anon

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mykpopconfession · 4 years ago

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It's long but hey, thank you so much for allowing me to share my thoughts as kpop is something I do enjoy but I like to look at it from other points of view, how it looks to me from various perspectives, not just as face value kpop fans have tantrums every time something isn't right or whenever idol does something so small and irrelevant it becomes a scandal… shocking but idols are humans and won't always perform to the fans standard.

Fans bitch and whine about how the standard of kpop industry is too harsh yet it's not the industry that is encouraging it, it's the fans themselves, they cant accept minor mistakes and everything gets taken out of context while fans claim they know the idols… ie: Jennie's “lazy” scandal.

Yet they don’t scrutinize the idols whenever they are sexist, colorist, ageist, misogynist, racist, because they can “do no wrong” or their fans, will come to save their asses… even the flipping companies encourage it because they want them to be younger. After all, it's more appealing??? but what 25+-year-old fans are going to be drawn to teens in a group? I don't even find itzy, txt appealing and their whole group’s image is directly for those of teenagers and below, the music/dances, the image, it’s all catered that specifically of a younger audience, shame, I would’ve liked them otherwise.

The younger the idols = the better publicity and the higher chances of gaining popularity by getting into “scandals” for the lack of maturity and social awareness nor are they likely to take accountability and just do whatever they please anyway because they’re idols and their fans will still claim that their age isn’t a problem or because they’re a child/teenager/minor then its okay kpop idols are so out of touch with reality that when they have some form of criticism they start banning and suing left right & center… because they live as though everyone is going to fall head over heels for them and blindly accept everything they do because most kpop fans are already blinded by their idols and cant accept when an idol says or does something disgustingly wrong nor can they accept mild criticism without getting their pitchforks out.. its a cult, no denying it.

As lovely as the choreography might be I don't want to watch the idols if they are doing any of the above: dancing overly provocatively (especially when they may be on the minor age scale), twerking or grinding the stage or anything overly sexual at that.

Kpop fans lap it up because its socially acceptable to objectify the idols and make them appealing because of their “dancing/performance” when it is turning them into some trend because they “danced” overly sexy/cute, that's all they amount to is the dancing side of it

TBH I found it intriguing at first but now every kpop group tries to have this “sexy” look and it just doesn't work. it’s like asking a foreigner to be interested in kpop when they act cute except its not normal to appear cute over here, it's only going to appeal to those who maybe find it intriguing or different from their own culture.

Yet cute/sexy is all kpop idols can amount to even if it looks so uncomfortable and unpleasing to watch. alas they are idols, they’re not humans, they can twerk, dance provocatively and act cute all because the fans will enjoy it no matter what it is or who it is… age isn’t even considered but the younger the better they stand a greater chance.

Which is like bighit canceling everyone of the older generations who maybe possess the same talent but with a maturer image and behavior… its both ageist and sexist, why is it some huge fetish that just boys in or around 1999 only for their new survival show thing i-land? I find it… odd more than exciting or interesting cause I know its just typical for the members to be more younger but less appealing to older generation cause I have nothing that I’d relate too I don't even relate to the TikTok trend because that's all it is, another trend or bandwagon. yet everyone treats it as being this incredible new thing that suddenly acceptable for young folk even though it brings so much disgusting behavior/drama along with it, its a recycled version of the vine but worse, in the same sense this is what kpop does, recycle groups once they’re less appealing to make way for the same groups but look slightly different. 2ne1/blackpink, BTS/txt yet the fans don't say nothing about how it is encouraging the sexual appeal and almost asking for fans to thirst over them because this is what “dance” supposedly should be. sexy/cute nothing in between, it's saying that idols should portray this image cause it’s more appealing than the music itself. if the male idols show their abs/skin even better, females? wear the most uncomfortable looking clothing and ur good to go.

The kpop sounds now have become about the group's image, level of popularity, as opposed to actual talent, creative freedom and ability to give off a genuine performance that doesn’t include anything generic or robotic image. its got to be loud, bright, vivid because its all for the dance/sexual appeal of both the male and female gender is almost aligned with the concept for it.

The lyrics can be as disgusting as they please because its okay, its only kpop. any lyrics are acceptable, bts got called out for their lyrics in one song yet not in any of the others? same for other groups, so few call out the lyrics because lyrics mean nothing. it's about the visual appeal of the groups and the kind of fame they gather from it alone so you can have the visuals but do the bare minimum and not have much stage presence but be classed as a main singer or dancer, its okay fans will lap it up no matter what it is. also, I’ve noticed the same sound being used across several groups depending on the concept of the song… repetitive much? why does kpop fear change or standing out? why get idols to become something they are not ie: whitening their naturally beautiful dark skin, have idols who don’t need to, lose weight. it's not the company its the idols encouraging it because it's acceptable and normalized to be anything other than thick, natural and healthy.

Ppl act like trying to shove kpop into the western music genre will make it appeal any better, the fans act like they couldn’t see the racism coming, but that's what happened bts were forced into a culture that had nothing to do with them because in western we generally hop from one bandwagon to the next and just roll with it since it's popular it must be good.

ie: one direction, psy, 5 seconds of summer and now bts… how do so many don't see the pattern nor did they see bts coming? you expect Asian artists to become greatly admired over here too but when you shove it in ppl’s faces and try to get it to become the next big thing, not everyone is gonna see the appeal I honestly feel like it's been forced… not by the companies but by the international fans. now instead of trying to gain popularity in their home country kpop groups try too hard to appeal to the western market… you can’t even deny how vastly generic bts’ music has become SINCE they hit the American music awards or whatever it was. note: they didn’t even win awards for their music, but simply their popularity is what got them there

I loved boyz with fun, despised boy with Luv yet because they’ve been in the American industry’s eyes they put it out what has become popular just using their language… well sometimes, even idol, what could’ve been a great song with a nice meaning missed some marks, as in the overuse of auto-tune has become almost normal for them? vs using natural vocal abilities, I'm no coach but straining one's voice to hit a high note in a slow song doesn’t sound healthy. when all bts have done in the past is upbeat music is why they struggle to maintain high notes in slow songs because they’ve followed the same music style for so long then suddenly changed it so their voices don't match softer songs… which I’d appreciate more of instead of just dark lyrics and over-hyped upbeat poppy music.

ie: I loved the sound for serendipity, but the lyrics weren’t as good and Jimin kinda struggled to sing it well enough both in-studio and live, however its one of my more favorite songs. I’d also appreciate a slower gentle song that isn’t about a relationship too thanks looking @ you euphoria.

You think it's about the music, lyrical side of it but I disagree, it's merely the concept of yet another boy group that's sadly taken over in the most overbearingly forced way possible and you all act like the racism wasn’t going to occur. nct had an incredibly shit time in America during their tour its because it's not meant for America, its trying force kpop to become something it's not just to fit in with western music taste. I miss when they did full songs in Korean now they do English full versions with hella cringe-worthy lyrics and expect them to blow up or become the next big thing.

I’ve been walking with the cheese and the queso????? if ur happy and u know it clap ur hands???? theses ones make me laugh more than wanting to listen repeatedly, they throw them in there simply to appeal to western music, no matter if its a bad lyric, doesn't make sense or is cringe-worthy.

Kpop is built for Korean consumption it's great to see it's expanded however, its in the wrong directions for the wrong appeal. bts did not pave the way when psy also existed the same year they debuted. bts tried to get a following in America but failed because naturally psy was almost made fun of for just being an Asian doing what he does best yet the hype quickly dyed down & everyone moved on until bts came into the scene… so far behind than when they should’ve gone viral years before. not the companies fault but merely the appeal of the image/music wasn’t suited to the western music genre so when they become familiar more with America they switched the songs to sound pop-like… nothing wrong but less appealing than their original image/music, which I prefer, I’d say it started to change with not today era.

The only reason being bts have stuck around now is because of the boy group concept even if the lyrics aren’t that great when translated into English, they’ve already tried and IMO, failed to push their music into the western music industry and they’ve won awards solely based on the fandom/popularity alone kpop has become less and less about the music, energy of the performances, now it's about if they look right together as a group. how the group as a whole appeal to the fans and what makes the fans blinded by them… which is essentially their sex appeal, whether the idols are grown women or men or even teenagers, who might be uncomfortable with fans lusting after them. whether they’re dancing sexy or acting somewhat cute doesn’t matter because it's become acceptable and a must if you want to be an idol so fans can thirst over them.

Sorry not sorry but kpop has become much less about the music itself and see what is trendy puts it to music and calls it the next big thing. which is a shame I love the language I love how it sounds in the songs & I also love that it encourages me to learn the language that's more appealing than the group image/songs itself but they’re letting looks matter to the point where groups are mistreated abroad by both media and fans alike all because of this group image concept. nct getting mixed up with bts was pure racist but how can they fail to tell how different they are? wait, no, any Asian boys in a group must be considered to be bts… see its just one hype train after the other, even Astro got mixed and when parasite become popular and rightly won the awards some were racist. Trump's comment was appalling but at least he got the country right, yes, everything that's become popularised in America is from South Korea, gold star for that.

Its the concept of boy groups. not the music itself. if it were music then day6 would have a similar appeal, gain the same momentum as bts/nct have done, yet because they differ from the typical dance style boy group they won't gain the same effect as their counterparts, bts / nct & whoever else.

Yet they’re still appealing to the wider international audience and did very well with their tours, same for the rose, they don’t trend in the same way boy groups do but have some form of appeal because it’s a different concept/image style altogether than the way bts / nct, etc are put together but still they don’t have the same effect as some of the more dance-based groups have because its a different genre but still from the same industry…

Different genre means less appealing or less popular but I’d say day6 are doing better, producing a greater amount of pleasing music, with reasonable lyrics but don't receive the same amount of popularity. compare to bts / nct who follow similar styles mixed up of what is trendy and call it a day. whereas kpop dance groups throw anything out there and its okay cause fans will lap it up too.

It's not the song that got blackpink to Coachella, its purely the appeal of yet another young women based group, again solely so they can push the feminism, girl power movement through their “songs” but it's their image of youthful cutely acting girls that gains the attention of western men/women… little mix tried it so why not blackpink, heck even fifth harmony failed to maintain the popularity because the appeal wasn’t there in the songs, but they were females in a group, therefore, they must have some form of appeal to the public / recent trends, bandwagons

#kpop #kpop confession #kpop confessions #general

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meta-squash · 5 years ago

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A ramble on Dallas Theater Center Les Miserables

So, 5 years late, I jumped back on the bandwagon and finally watched a bootleg of Dallas Theater Center’s 2014 production of Les Miserables.

And wow. I can’t believe I waited 5 damn years to watch it. So here’s a long rambling write up on it based on the live-tweeting I was doing as I watched (and a little bit on me skipping through the bootleg video right now). It’s partly just me summarizing scenes so I can nerd out about the little details I loved and towards the end me talking about the show as a whole and why it was so fucking important.

First of all I wanna say that I'm surprised it took this long for a professional theater company to do a "modern day" Les Mis. I know all the fans fucking love their Modern AUs fics, I've been reading them since like 2012 and I love them. But also I'm SO glad someone finally did it because Les Miserables' themes are universal and they are amazing but they're also really relevant to what's going on today, or 5 years ago (since it's only gotten fucking worse tbh).

My first big impression was how great the costuming was. You can tell the socioeconomic class of the characters just from what they’re wearing, from how they posture and interact with others. Which is easy when it’s period costuming, you just make everyone look dirty and ripped up vs not dirty, but this (aside from the Thenardiers) is a little more subtle.

Also re: the costuming, I absolutely LOVE that they modernized Javert’s costume into a cop’s uniform but managed to retain the classic Javert Silhouette by giving him that trenchcoat, so we still get the expected Inspector Javert Silhouette despite the fact that he’s a modern day cop. Also all of the other cops/soldiers being straight up SWAT was an excellent decision, not only because it shows the sheer violence of a police that isn’t supposed to necessarily be SWAT, but also because the helmets completely cover their heads, so when the soldiers sing lines, they don’t even sound human. Yet another layer.

Nehal Joshi as Valjean was great. Honestly the moment I keep thinking about is actually from the very beginning, just after Valjean is released. Joshi looks so happy, delighted, like his heart is light again. He smiles as he sings “ Drink from the pool / How clean the taste” while looking up into the sky like he’s amazed at being in the open air. Then suddenly his posture changes completely, becomes guarded and hard, his expression gets closed off, and he sings “Never forget the years, the waste” before thumbing at his nose in that tough way and grabbing his bag off the ground. It was an emphasis on a pair of lines that I’ve never seen properly emphasized before. Usually the emphasis is on the next lines, when Valjean is saying “Now let’s see / what this new world has in store for me”. But here they emphasize that despite being free, he has traumas he has to deal with, and experiences that mean he’s wary of the world. It makes his theft of the silver make a lot more sense; it’s not just opportunistic, it’s also that he straight up doesn’t trust anybody.

(Another note on costumes: Valjean’s post-prison costume is his orange jumpsuit with this weird ratty, torn up sweater thing over it. I do very much wish they’d given him a hoodie that was equally as ratty instead of a sweater because I feel like that would’ve been another interesting layer of commentary.)

Two notes I made specifically about this production’s Soliloquy: This production had Valjean rip his prison papers accidentally, while he’s in the middle of an emotional gesture, then he stares at the rip in disbelief, and comes to the realization that he could just rip it up, and so he does. I thought that was a very cool mechanic. The audience literally watches him get the idea of changing who he is. Also, when he sings “I am reaching, but I fall / And the night is closing in” he actually wraps the rope of his bag around his own neck, like he’s considering death, like he doesn’t know what to do with himself. I thought it was really interesting considering those are the lines that directly mirror/parallel Javert’s Suicide.

This production also has all the Bad People roles played by white people, which is just fantastic. The foreman, Javert, all the cops, etc etc. I thought it was an excellent decision, since all of the main characters (minus the revolutionaries) are POC.

Fantine was amazing, has an incredible voice, and her I Dreamed A Dream sounded genuinely miserable, almost frantic with the fact that not only is she a single mother struggling to pay for her child who’s living with some other family, she now has nowhere to turn for money at all, and she’s completely alone. I think she’s my favorite Fantine of any of the ones I saw.

And Lovely Ladies absolutely blew me away. This was the first Lovely Ladies I’ve ever seen that felt Real. Not just that there was sex going on (because there was, there’s people fucking and getting blowjobs etc in the background the entire time), but it doesn’t feel like something silly or shallow. The entire thing feels desperate and exploitative and miserable and painful. Most of the other characters are dressed in provocative, revealing clothes. But there are a few in just jeans and t-shirts, looking desperate and kind of bedraggled. And then you have Fantine, who is literally just in a slip and long socks, looking out of place and terrified.

The usual Lovely Ladies shenanigans do ensue, but there’s a tinge of horribleness to it that is sharper than in the traditional show. In the traditional show, the moment where the music suddenly slows, and all the women sing “Lovely ladies / Going for a song / Got a lot of callers / But they never stay for long”, it usually feels like kind of a weird and unprompted moment of introspection after so much ruckus, but in this version the reason everyone slows down is because the pimp plucks their cash out of each of their hands one by one. And then the horribleness is increased tenfold because all of the women are in a line with men behind them simulating sex, and Fantine is in the center, bent double, the Captain behind her, staring down the audience. With each thrust she grits her words out like she’s in pain in every way imaginable. And the Captain ‘finishes’ just as she hits the line “dead!” Which is just. A lot. But so good. It packs so much more of a punch than Fantine leading the Captain offstage, or to one side of the stage.

The way that Confrontation was staged was also so cool to me. In the shows I’ve seen the first part of Confrontation is Javert and Valjean facing off with Javert stage left and Valjean kind of up beside Fantine’s bed, but they’re on the same “level,” in that Valjean walks a few paces forward a few lines later and they grapple. In this version, they stood quite literally on either side of Fantine’s hospital bed, so that they’re arguing across her dead body.

Madame Thenardier made me think of a bizarre cross between Miss Hannigan, the mom from Matilda, and Patsy Stone from Absolutely Fabulous. She did a great job. M Thenardier is a douchey hipster pirate type guy with white guy dreads. Also they made him an ex-con as well, but he displays the numbers tattooed on his chest with pride compared to Valjean who hides them, which was yet another interesting decision.

This version of Les Mis has taught me that “My mom doesn’t let me drink” is the absolute BEST piece of spoken dialogue you could throw in before Master Of The House kicks the fuck off.

Also this version has Eponine participating in the scams during Master Of The House: she takes peoples’ orders, carries plates, dances, etc. She’s cleaner and more pampered than Cosette, but she’s still being used.

Look Down was really interesting to me. Now, I think what I’m about to say is partly informed by costuming. That is, I think with period costuming an audience has a harder time distinguishing more subtle roles between (non-main) characters. What I mean is, in traditional Look Down, it just seems like three characters having an argument with each other, but with a modernized version the costuming makes it clear that it’s an old beggar woman, a prostitute, and her pimp. While that’s obvious from the actual dialogue, the period costuming makes it a little harder to glean the separate character types other than “beggar type”. Anyway, the roles being clearer via costuming makes all the interactions seem a lot more Real. It’s not just people all dressed alike singing lines at each other, it’s actual separate people having actual conflicts.

Also, I really really liked Mark Hancock as Gavroche. He’s older, or at least bigger, than most kids who end up playing Gavroche, and he’s not the most beautiful singer, but I think that works all the better for a production like this one. He’s not a cutesy Oliver Twist-type character. He’s a kid living rough on the streets, and he’s got a sense of humor but he is a badass.

This version also had a LOT more flirtatious behavior between Marius and Cosette. Like it’s not just one glance on the street. During The Robbery, Marius and Cosette are giving little glances and flirty waves the whole time, all shy and cute, little hand signals like “I want to talk to you oh my god” etc. Also this Cosette has glasses! She’s so cute!

Stars as a song feels very weird when it’s a Modern Day Cop singing about such a philosophical topic, and at first I was kinda ??? about it. Because you know, in a period piece, you kind of expect more elaborate language, you expect certain types of morality, etc. It sounds weird coming out of someone dressed like a pig you’d see on the street in real life. But then at the end of the song Javert takes a rosary out of his breast pocket to sing “Lord let me find him...” etc, and suddenly it actually made a lot of sense. It finally connected the religious references and morality displayed in the lyrics. Because a lot of shitty cops in real life are masquerading as Christians, so again, a good decision.

Ah, the ABC Cafe. Always lovely to hear those horns. John Campione was AMAZING as Enjolras. At first I was a little disappointed they made him a white guy, but then I thought about it and it actually makes a lot of sense. Despite his passion about justice etc, Brick Enjolras is a wealthy student; what better way to show his privilege in a modern setting than to have him be white? Anyway, I think Campione did a great job of portraying a leader who is so passionate, and so dedicated, and so intent on his cause but also kind of stressed out as the day draws nearer. (More on that later.)

Similarly, this Grantaire is a little shit. He does this hilarious like “call on me!” hand raise before “I am agog, I am aghast” which I thought was quite funny and cute. Also after “It’s better than an opera,” the Amis all laugh and clap, and Enjolras does this extremely sarcastic slow clapping before admonishing Marius with “It is time for us all to decide who we are” etc. Also Grantaire and Enjolras are actually standing beside each other for Marius lines, so that when he says “struck to the bone in a moment of breathless delight,” Grantaire looks directly at Enjolras and stays staring at him, so that when he moves downstage to stand across from Marius and sing “Red!” and “Black!” at him, it feels more like solidarity than mocking.

But then Enjolras pulls Marius further downstage for his “Marius you are no longer a child” etc lines. His body language is great here. When he sings “Who cares about your lonely soul,” he doesn’t just look like some charismatic leader man. He looks like someone who’s stressed out and a little annoyed/exasperated that this person is causing a distraction right when things are started to get important. He runs his hands through his hair, his gestures are clipped and fast, like he’s got too much energy and isn’t quite sure where to put it. It’s so good. He sings “Our little lives don’t count at all.” And then there’s a long, long moment of silence. A long one, where Marius looks around at his friends and realization that what they’re undertaking is much bigger than his emotional outburst, that Enjolras is right and he has to be with them instead of off in the clouds. And he raises his hand tentatively and then more surely towards Enjolras and sings that next “Red! The blood of angry men!” all on his own before the rest of the Amis join in. GREAT decisions there. SO COOL. (Also this is the moment when an Amis Hand Sign is established, which is important later on.)

This show uses silence in a way that I’ve never really seen another version do it. After Gavroche yells “General Lamarque is dead!” there’s usually a beat of silence before Enjolras begins to sing. In this version there is a long, long moment of silence when everyone looks around at each other, a moment where Joly tosses his pamphlet angrily onto the table and sits down with his head in his hands, a moment where Marius and Grantaire are the only two who turn away and face upstage at the news, a moment where they all process that this is fucking Real, and everything that they’ve been planning is suddenly Actually Happening. And then Enjolras begins, and his voice is so soft, and so sad, and it’s like he’s delivering a eulogy, but it’s only when he gets to “Is the sign we await!” and we get those trumpets that it changes into Enjolras The Leader, and it’s go time, and everything is Intense. Campione is fantastic as Enjolras because I think often people play Enjolras as this solid, charismatic leader who is stoney-faced and sure of himself etc. Which works for the period style (and is fairly Brick-accurate), but I think would seem a little odd in a modern day setting. This Enjolras is in it, he’s into it, he’s fucking intense and ablaze with energy. He sings Do You Hear The People Sing like he’s giving a speech, like he’s trying to convince (And “the real glory is to convince” so y’know).

And Do You Hear The People Sing as a campaigning song is brilliant. It starts out not with march, but with handing out fliers made of red paper, passing them out and getting out the word. Only then do they pull out signs and put on red caps and start marching.

In My Life/A Heart Full Of Love was so fucking hilariously cute. Marius and Cosette are both excellent levels of awkward, and there’s a lot of nonverbal flirting going on, and I just thought it was really well done.

I was told while I was live-tweeting that during One Day More the sort of dancing march they do (because it’s like a dance, instead of the in-place marching of the traditional version) is actually the Toyi-Toyi, a South African dance that was used as a form of protest during Apartheid and during other times as well. So that was a very cool addition. I’m sure there are other callbacks in this show to other protests or protest traditions like that that I didn’t even catch. The dance also reminded me of the body percussion used in A Quoi Tu Danses from 1789: Les Amants De La Bastille, so that was cool as well. We also get face paint and signs and red berets and button pins and a lot of stuff that has been seen in a lot of modern protests/movements lately.

Side note: Javert’s disguise is amazing because he retains his cop boots and trousers and crisp white shirt; he just puts a brown jacket and a red scarf over it and wears a red beret.

OKay SO. This is possibly the BEST On My Own I’ve ever seen. Now, I’m highly partial to Briana Carlson-Goodman as Eponine because the emotion in her voice is just mind-blowing. But this On My Own was so amazing. First of all, I’m amazed I’ve never seen any other production do this: when Eponine sings “pretending he’s beside me”, she puts out her hand like she’s holding some imaginary lover’s hand, like she’s genuinely imagining him walking with her, and it made her self-deception that much sadder. And this version was so good, I think because it was this perfect combination of angry and disappointed and yearning and self-deceiving. You can tell this Eponine KNOWS she’s deluding herself that Marius will ever love her, that she’s hugely disappointed and almost angry at that fact, but she still loves him and wants him and wants that love, and it just makes that self-deception all the stronger.

This version of Les Mis brings the barricade in as a flown set piece, which I think is an interesting decision. I definitely prefer the US Tour version, where the downstage scrim is backlit/lifted and both the audience and Eponine are suddenly confronted with the fully-built barricade. However, the barricade being flown in does give the Barricade Boys a moment to stand and admire their handiwork, so that’s kind of also cool.

(Somewhat unrelated, but throughout the show this Grantaire is a lot more still than other actors’ versions of R, but also more still than the other Amis in this show, so it’s clearly a choice. Other version of R are slumped over a table or slumped on the ground a lot, or they’re wobbly, or just generally restless and upset. This R is so still and just standing unmoved and blank it’s definitely a choice. Very much taking the “he seemed to be waiting there for a bullet which should spare him the trouble of waking” quote from the Brick and translating it to the stage version, in that he does move to shoot his gun but aside from that he’s so stock still it’s like he’s given up. Anyway. Back to the actual show instead of me just waxing lyrical about my favorite character.

When Eponine climbs over the barricade, Marius waves down all the guns just as Joly yells “There’s a boy climbing the barricade!” This kind of happens in other versions, but it seems like most of the traditional Les Mis versions all the Barricade Boys just kind of accept someone’s climbing the barricade and let Eponine over? In this one Marius like actually is waving down their guns, blatantly being like “don’t shoot, I know this person.”

And when Eponine is revealed to be shot, they don’t just let her die in Marius’ arms. The first half of A Little Fall Of Rain is sung with Eponine in Marius’ arms, but there’s also Feuilly there as a medic, pressing handkerchiefs to her wound, his hand on her with Marius’ hand on top of his and Eponine’s on top of them both. When Marius is saying “and you will live ‘Ponine,” medic/Feuilly shakes his head at him as if to say, ‘don’t tell her that, she’s not going to make it, I’m so sorry,’ but he still has his hand on her wound. It’s only when she sings “Just hold me now, and let it be” that Eponine pushes the medic/Feuilly away so she can die just with Marius. I really, really, really loved that because it seems so Right. Like, they’re fighting for a better world, they’re not just going to let an injured person die, they’re going to try their best to help her even if she’s dying and there’s nothing they can do. And I really liked that there was a medic there, but he was faced upstage, away from the audience, as if he was trying to help but also not intrude on this private moment. But when Eponine does push him away, he goes fairly easily, like he’s realized that she’s realized that she’s going to die. Also, instead of carrying Eponine offstage like a ragdoll, Grantaire and Feuilly bring over a stretcher and she’s carried off in it by Marius and Feuilly while Grantaire collects the handkerchiefs that were bloodied by her wound.

Valjean’s soldier disguise is the SWAT gear, even the helmet, although he mostly carries it in his hand rather than wearing it. It’s interesting because the difference between the SWAT gear and the suits he wears as Fauchelevent are a hugely stark difference, whereas the difference between his nice period clothes and the soldier’s period uniform isn’t quite so intense.

I noticed that during Drink With Me, Joly put his hand on Grantaire’s shoulder during “Let the wine of friendship never run dry,” which is sweet. I also noticed that aside from the moments where he was shooting his gun and the few moments he was being helpful re: Eponine’s death, Grantaire spends most of his time very very still, staring down at the floor with his shoulders slumped. He judges moments with just a shake of the head and turning away while others watch. His part in Drink With Me is sung with a bitterness that is more final than it is angry, like he can’t understand why they’ve all chosen to sacrifice themselves like this and he hates it and he’s bitter that all his friends are going to die but he’s realized there’s nothing he can do about it.

Bring Him Home is SUCH a hard song to sing and it’s actually really interesting in this version, I think. Because in traditional shows I think Valjean is played as a fairly calm person who is just always calm. Joshi plays his Valjean like he has taught himself to be calm, but inside he’s still kind of angry and traumatized and still has those instincts and still doesn’t quite know whether to believe in god or not, or something like that. So Bring Him Home is a moment where it seems like at first he’s just hoping, and then by the end of the song he’s genuinely imploring god to save Marius. Like it’s the first time he’s ever really begged a higher power to do something instead of just acting of his own power to make the good happen. I have no idea if I’m articulating myself well.

Again, Campione is a FANTASTIC Enjolras who plays him like a stressed out passionate leader who is constantly stuck between This Is Finally Real Hooray and Holy Shit This Is Too Fucking Real Oh God. In The Second Attack he portrays it really well, looking around at all the people he suddenly feels responsible for, body language like he’s trying to make too many split-second decisions. It’s just really good.

Death Of Gavroche is also great because even though this Gavroche is not the best singer, he gets shot once and keeps reaching for the bullets, and only stops when they riddle him with bullets. Also, I didn’t realize this until skipping around in the video to write this, but I think they kind of tried to retain some of the Gavroche-Grantaire relationship that the US Tour established? Grantaire goes from being kinda listless stage left to bolting over to the barricade once Gavroche starts climbing, reaching for him desperately; he gets shot in the leg and goes down and spends the rest of Gavroche’s lines up to his death with his head in his hands. Once Gavroche dies, Enjolras actually checks on Grantaire and wraps a tourniquet around his leg while Feuilly and Marius tend to Gavroche’s body.

Marius gets a thigh injury during The Final Battle (we know this because this production shows Actual Blood! Gavroche is actually bleeding! Eponine, too! And Marius! And Enjolras! Like there’s actual red and it makes it so much more intense! Anyway, Marius gets a bullet to the thigh, which frankly I think makes a lot more sense than the shoulder injury he gets in canon at least in terms of him being unconscious for so long (although I guess in canon he also has at least one head injury so meh). Anyway, Valjean sees it and immediately tourniquets him as one by one all the revolutionaries are picked off by bullets.

This Enjolras death is my favorite I’ve ever seen. We don’t get a permets-tu scene, but that’s okay because this is fantastic in another way. Enjolras doesn’t die on the barricade.

Enjolras is standing center stage, the bodies of his friends around him. He’s shot once, in the stomach, and goes down on all fours. As he’s on the floor, SWAT cops surround him, pointing machine guns straight at him. Enjolras struggles up, standing, and faces the cops and the audience. He raises his hand in a defiant fist to the air and is shot in the head.

Then there is a long, long stretch of silence. Quite literally an entire minute (I just counted) of silence, where there is no music, no speaking, nothing. Just the sounds of SWAT walking around, checking the bodies on the floor, and the indistinct sound of walky-talky chatter. Only after a whole minute of silence has passed and the SWAT leave the stage do the little plucked notes and the clarinet playing the Bring Him Home instrumental begin as Valjean stands up.

Valjean actually goes over and checks Enjolras’ pulse to see if he could possibly be alive, which I think hurts A Lot. And then there’s a moment where he looks around at all the bodies on the floor and kind of doubles over in shock, but only for a moment, and then he’s bolting back over to Marius to make sure he’s still breathing and then heaving him up into his arms.

(By the way, the bodies of the revolutionaries remain onstage through all of the proceeding songs.)

Dog Eat Dog is a boring, crap song in every production, and this one is no exception. The guy playing Thenardier is quite good but there’s really no way to redeem how boring a song Dog Eat Dog is. Also, this version cuts out the long instrumental part of Valjean walking with Marius through the sewer due to the fact that they don’t have that crazy projection thing. Instead it’s just a few seconds of him dragging Marius before encountering Thenardier and then also a few seconds before encountering Javert. Also, Valjean straight up puts his chest against Javert’s gun while he’s asking to save Marius’ life. Brave as fuck.

Okay this Javert’s Suicide was mostly really really good. Edward Watts gives Javert this sort of frantic emotion that Valjean spared him on the barricade and then is only asking to save this stranger. He looks genuinely freaked out and distressed. It’s not just confusion, it’s like actual Freaking Out. The only part I didn’t like was the actual throwing himself off the bridge part, but honestly I feel like there really is no way to do that part in a way that isn’t a little ridiculous-seeming. It��s hard to have a show where they never had any sort of fly rigs or any special types of practical effects at all and then suddenly there’s a guy flying through the air? and take that seriously. I dunno. But in any case, the rest of it is really good because the frantic confusion and questioning and anger and sadness and everything is so well done. Also, he takes his cross out of his pocket and drops it on the ground before he jumps, like he believes even god has failed him.

And then the lights return and the bodies of the revolutionaries are still onstage, with police tape cordoning them off. Turning begins with women in black mourning clothes coming onstage: at first they stand behind the tape with candles and flowers and teddy bears, then someone breaks the tape and they move to sit beside the bodies and set flowers down beside them. As Turning is going on, as the women move to sit beside the bodies, Marius also enters and sits in a chair upstage.

So Empty Chairs At Empty Tables happens with the bodies of the revolutionaries lying on the floor right in front of Marius, and women in black kneeling beside the bodies, facing upstage. But as Marius sings “Phantom faces at the window, phantom shadows on the floor,” the revolutionaries rise and move downstage, looking at him. They all make their little group hand sign before exiting, until it’s just Enjolras looking at him, then he makes the sign as well and exits and Marius is left alone with the mourning women in front of him and his hand raised in farewell. It’s just SO GOOD because I think it makes it all the more real. It feels like he’s actually singing to the bodies of his friends as well as their memories, like he’s full of survivor’s guilt and he’s watching them walk away from him and doesn’t know what to do. Combining the Turning Women’s mourning with Marius’ mourning is really cool, because it shows it’s really not just Marius that’s affected by this, and essentially he’s singing Empty Chairs for himself as well as the women in mourning kneeling on the stage before him.

Side note: Dorcas Leung, who plays Cosette, is a True Fucking Soprano. Her voice is SO high. It’s wild. Like, really wild. Like, glass-breaking high but in a good way. Also she’s really cute.

Anyway, the next thing I took note of was Valjean telling Marius why he was leaving without telling Cosette goodbye. He sings “Promise me, Monsieur, Cosette will never know” and puts his hand out in a way that’s partially imploring, and partially asking for a handshake on the promise. Marius says “For the sake of Cosette, it must be so,” but pointedly does not shake his hand. He’s going to honor the promise but he’s not gonna fucking like it.

Wedding Chorale/Beggars At The Feast is mostly unremarkable except that Mme Thenardier is dressed like Cruella de Ville. Oh, and Thenardier gets a kick in the balls instead of a punch to the face from Marius. Also the actor who played Combeferre and the actor who played Bossuet are dancing together so during Beggars At The Feast when Thenardier sings “This one’s a queer, but what can you do?”, the Combeferre actor does a little wave.

I’ve always hated in the musical that Valjean goes from being perfectly healthy to straight up dying in a matter of minutes but I also understand that montages of like a year are hard to do in musical format, so I forgive it but it’s still annoying.

Anyway, this Epilogue is FUCKING FANTASTIC. Valjean does this beautiful laugh of relief and amazement when Fantine tells him “And you will be with god” like he’s still amazed after all these years that he’s a Good Person Who Deserves Heaven.

Also, Fantine sits down on the bench beside Valjean, and then when Marius and Cosette enters, Cosette runs and sits down between Valjean and Fantine, facing Valjean, and there’s a moment where Fantine smiles in disbelief and strokes Cosette’s hair like “oh my god this is my daughter!”

Finally, the fucking kicker for me: “Take my hand, I’ll lead you to salvation / Take my love, for love is everlasting.” That’s always the moment in the show when I start actually crying and this one made it even sadder: Eponine is not the only one to enter in that moment. Eponine enters singing the duet with Fantine like usual, but Enjolras and Gavroche also enter, standing behind her, not singing.

This was such a great, fascinating, unique decision, and I fucking loved it. Because with that group, you have all the types of love and belief that are Important in the Brick: Fantine, the love of a mother. Valjean, the love of a father and the faith and belief that comes from someone else suddenly believing in you and the goodness that is a result of that. Marius and Cosette, romantic love, but also love of children and chosen family. Eponine, unrequited love and sacrifice. Gavroche, not necessarily love but an innocent death, a death from the goodness that comes from wanting to help. And Enjolras, the love of the people, the belief in the people, love of patria and the belief in justice. Just all of these important symbols standing together.

Then Do You Hear The People Sing reprise starts up, and the rest of the cast enter and stand at the edges of the stage around the group at center before everyone scatters out and spreads across the stage.

So basically that was an incredible fucking show. Like, okay. Since joining the Les Mis fandom in late 2011-ish or something I've read A LOT of Les Mis fanfics, I've read the entire book, seen the show live half a dozen times plus a ton of filmed boots and movie adaptations and last year's BBC miniseries. I've got a Les Mis tattoo and I'm vaguely thinking of getting another one. I've read fanfic taking place in canon era, modern day, Mai 1968, the 90s, the 40s, and on and on. All of them are important because all of them interpret the themes differently. Basically what I'm saying is I've consumed A Lot of Les Miserables.

But this version of Les Mis is So Important. Like, it's important enough I'm really surprised they didn't give in to the call for a DVD recording back in 2014.

Because the difference between like, the traditional version of the show, and reading a modern day AU fanfiction, and this Dallas show is that this Dallas show is In Front Of You. It's important because you're used to seeing this show with 19th century clothes and 19th century mannerisms so you don't necessarily connect it to today, or you do on a surface level only.

And in fanfics you can imagine it, but it's not the same.

But this show takes the music we all know and the characters we all know and places it in front of us NOW. We get Valjean in an orange jumpsuit, posturing like we've seen people posture in real life. We get Enjolras in a denim vest and button pins. We get Fantine, a woman of color, being fired for having a child out of wedlock and being accused of prostitution, and having to actually turn to prostitution. And we get a depiction that shows so viscerally how horrible that is. We get white people as cops (SWAT, no less) while POC are abused.

Suddenly this is a show that connects on every level.

And not only that but the visuals of the actual rebellion can be connected to so many movements and protests and things that have happened in recent years. Like with the Toyi-Toyi. And all the signs and pins and face paint and weapons and clothes and even to some extent the barricade.

And the cops going from soldiers with bayonets (which, to be fair, back in the day were pretty daunting weapons with their triangular blades, but we don't see them that way) to SWAT with helmets that black out their faces and semi-automatics is a a hard-hitting message.

And I've always thought it was funny that people who see the show casually think it's about Marius & Cosette's romance. Because that’s not all it’s about, of course. But this version made me really, really realize how little that romance matters in the musical. How much the musical is about Valjean, and then in tandem about the rebellion. Because place the whole "I've known you a day and I'm in love" thing in a modern setting and you realize how ridiculous it is, and how much more important Valjean's growth is, and how much more important the movement and the rebellion is. I mean the entire book is just about the Power Of Love And Belief In All Its Forms etc etc. But I think this version pointed out better than any other how many other forms of love exist in this story, besides the romance of Marius and Cosette.

But truly I think the most important thing that this show did is what I mentioned earlier: it placed the story, its themes, its characters, its rebellion, it's Love and Belief, in the Here And Now, and made it really, truly connect with its audience and the present world. This is a show that people always say is so relevant, so important, and it is. It really is. But sometimes, for a casual viewer, it’s hard to see past the period costumes and sets. And then you transplant the show into modern dress and modern sets and suddenly it’s a story that is just as believable and hard-hitting and important now as it was then. Suddenly you can connect with these characters and you can see these things happening in real life, in present day, and you can believe that it would happen.

It just blows my mind that we have all these Modern AU fanfiction pieces, that we have multiple groups of people doing Modern Les Mis Youtube interpretations, that there’s a Spanish musical out there that’s purely about Grantaire (which, god I wish there was more info on!), that there’s a ton of music and TV adaptations and yet this is the first time I’ve seen a professional company do any sort of modern interpretation of the show. And it works SO incredibly well and is SO hard-hitting and just took my breath away.

Uh so yeah such massive praise to the Dallas Theater Center for having the courage and imagination and awesomeness to finally do a modern version of this story because they knocked it out of the damn park and made an already important story even more important.

#les miserables #les mis #dallas les mis #dallas les miserables #dallas theater center #dallas theater center les miserables #les mis dallas #les miserables meta #les mis meta

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