#also just to be writing again in general lol
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
braintarts · 5 hours ago
Text
The definition of Therapy is not debatably- even if you write a long paragraph of incorrect information. Words mean thing even if purposely enjoy using them correctly.
If you Don't know what the APA is [Which is obvious] it stands for the American Psychological Association. Mr. "Appeal to Authority" wanted to pretend he was knowledgeable so It should be obvious, to know about one of the biggest psychological organization in the West. They aren't a perfect organization but the leaders in mental health care determine what the intent of their methodologies actual mean. Not some random scrotes on the internet that want to use therapy speak and can't even bother to get definition on the debate topic correct.
Tumblr media
It even brings up the argument the Mr. Appeal to Authority Fallacy tried to use but didn't actual extrapolate, about Couples & Families therapy. Since you people can be bothered again, to look up what your talking about. The close 2nd definition to Therapy-->Psychotherapy brings up Couples & Families therapy and established the the Mental Health reason for it.
Tumblr media
Uh Oh ! There's that word again about how Therapy exist to "Treat" something for mental illness, emotional or behavior disorder.
What are those Disorders ? Well if you aren't lazy, you could just look up in the DSM what Disorder in Psychology they are talking about. It should be obvious to most people its about psychology since in that field but I digress.
Wanting to change your behavior is not the same as undergoing therapy. Having a bad behavior like [ wanting to stop waking up last minute for your college classes] is not the same as a ]"Behavior disorder like OCD or Bipolar disorder] which again if you want actual learn something and have an inkling of what you are talking about check the DSM or a psychological website that explains them.
We aren't talking about the same thing , you just don't understand the meaning of the words . Though the TRA's behavior has taught the world that certain activist groups don't actual care about using words correctly if it doesn't fit their fantasy :) Can you tell in this sentence I am not referring to behavior in the psychology disorder but in how you general behavior...its almost like words mean things can you tell from context how the word is being used ?
[quote]
In regards to the field and abuse- any field that humans are in will be used to harm at some point. Also, every person (every single one) has flaws that, if left unchecked WILL lead them to mistreat others. That's just how being human works
[quote]
I really appreciate your entire lack of basic critical thinking, Scrote #1 tried to use a logical fallacy to pretend he couldn't be questioned so I gave an example of why that isn't true :). You are just spectacularly desperate to join in the debate without having an iota of following what's going on huh ?
In fact I even reexplained the rebuttal so your lack of reading comprehension is even more astounding.
------*
Also Crime committed by certain groups of people at higher rates based of sex [gender isn't real] and Race, Also certain family dynamics do make a child more suspectable to choose a dangerous lifestyle. Not that I expect TRA to use facts because they can't be bothered to use words correctly and to ignorant conflate crime data with phrenology ( I see what You did there)
The most obvious one is most rapist are male you can find that easily by looking at FBI statistics or Research Gate but hey you can't even get through the definition, so using statistical data to use pattern recognition is surely not on the table lol.
you cannot therapize misogyny out of a man because values are not pathologies. him not believing women are human will not be fixed by cbt or exposure therapy because it is not a cognitive health issue. it is an ideological one.
1K notes · View notes
melrosing · 2 days ago
Note
Did you like tyrions adwd arc?
I think it’s mostly good writing and makes a lot of sense as the kind of middle act for his arc but did I enjoy it…… not much tbh…. some ppl love it and I’m thrilled for them but for me it just doesn’t really compare to his KL storyline. I think Tyrion’s at his very best w a strong scene partner and he mostly lacks those in ADWD like. Jorah Mormont is not fuckin cutting it lol, where compared to Cersei/Tywin/Varys/even Bronn.
there’s also a LOT of exposition going on, so sometimes the Tyrion character study suffers for the fact that he’s being dragged from A to B to C to D so that we can gage the various shifts taking place in Essos, and those parts feel a bit ‘Tyrion Reacts’ to me. and the chapters are all just so LONG lmao. there are a few POVs I struggle with in ADWD and Tyrion isn’t the worst of them bc even though I don’t enjoy this arc I do generally really like Tyrion, so that makes it easier going then certain other POVs, but it does really reduce the momentum of the book for me. some ppl feel this way about AFFC and fair enough ig, but that’s how I feel about ADWD.
I guess it’s worth comparing to Brienne who similarly has a drawn out arc of wandering place to place with few strong scene partners, and why do I like those chapters so much yet not Tyrion’s in ADWD…. and I think the reason being that Brienne’s are so tight thematically, and so centred on her. there’s exposition as to the state of the Riverlands but this is all twined so tightly about her arc re. knighthood, honour, songs v reality etc that it’s just beautiful character work imo. and the way it exists in conversation w other stories old and new about knights on quests etc and what a quest ought to mean, idk, I love these chapters so much. and yeah I’m just comparing bc I think the reasons I like one kind of inform what I’m not so fussed on re. the other.
but w/e i don’t hate them - there’s lots I like about Tyrion’s ADWD chapters like the Joncon & Aegon reveal, Penny, and just the internal work we do get, and I am still v much looking forward to the rest of Tyrion’s story, where he’ll have more scene partners and can start driving the plot again rather than being dragged about by it, as I think that’s where he works best.
24 notes · View notes
clowningaroundmars · 2 months ago
Text
Hobie1610 pt. 4
after so many months of waiting, the wait... is finally over.
here is the fourth and final part of this little au idea i had brewing in my head for some time now. i hope you guys enjoy?
and thanks so much to everyone leaving encouraging and kind comments on the previous parts as well! really appreciate y'all :)
hope this ending is a satisfying one :)
>pt. 1 here<
>pt. 3 here<
MJ: We’re going to hang tomorrow after my shoot, right?
It was a text that Miles looked at and looked at and looked at all day ever since it arrived into his messages that very morning. It literally came out of nowhere.
But how long ago was it that he and Hobie Jones ran into each other at Central Park? It had to have been like a week ago, he was pretty sure...
He thinks.
“Maybe the guy’s pushy or somethin’, he just really likes you for some reason,” Ganke had offered by way of explanation as they sat together at lunch for the first time in what seemed like forever.
Miles wasn’t entirely sure when he and Ganke ever got to chill like this together in the cafeteria area... but as luck would have had it, Ganke’s mom forgot to send over some money for the week, forcing him to buy from the cheaper menu that the school had to offer rather than ordering off of the many food delivery apps he had on lock in his phone.
They sat a ways away from the hustle and bustle of the main area, near a big window that looked outwards into the typical scene of the congested New York City streets, and Miles would have been perfectly content with this arrangement had it not been for The Text.
He jiggled his leg and rubbed at his jaw in between bites of his own cheap meal-- something he got even though he didn’t really want it, but what was he gonna do, let Ganke wait in line by himself?-- gazing at his cell phone sitting right by his elbow. The text message was gazing right back at him.
“I… dunno. I-- man, I wish I told you more about my patrols so you can remind me how long ago Central Park was. I swear it was only like… last week? Right?”
Ganke chomped on his own slice of pepperoni pizza and shrugged. “I think that was a while ago. Either way, he wants to go on this date with you. So you might as well.”`
Miles groaned. “It’s not a date, Ganks. We’re just… chillin’, hangin’ out a little,” he gestured with his hands, which was not convincing Ganke at all. “Y’know?”
Ganke leaned forward a little bit, glasses slipping down his nose as he grinned mischievously. “Did he figure out it was you, Mi? Is that why you’re so nervous about it?”
“Whaaat are you talking about? No… no, he didn’t! I just. Uh, I saved him from those scary gang members and then I swung him home and that was that. No one else knows but you and my parents, Ganke, promise.” Miles’ smile was even less convincing.
“Miles,” Ganke deadpanned, “have you ever thought about what would happen if some Flickstagram-famous model learns about your thing you got goin’ on? He could be pushing this because he knows already, dude. Or at least he thinks he does. You’re a weird kid after all, and it wouldn't take too long to put two and two together... no offense.”
Miles shoved a fist under his chin and chewed a french fry pensively, trying to come up with an answer that wouldn't give him away.
The thing is, Hobie did know.
Miles still couldn’t shake off the memories of his warm fingertips hooking under his mask and slowly lifting it off of his face, the way his entire visage seemed so positively radiant with that dazzling smile once they met eyes. He remembered Hobie’s wiry arms clutching onto him for dear life as they flew across the stadium towards the exit, the easy banter they had going back and forth after the action finally died down and they were safely heading back to the outer gates of the park.
So Hobie definitely knew. That wasn’t really the problem... although, Ganke might be right. It could be in the future, if Miles didn’t play his cards right.
Hobie is a solid guy no matter what dimension Miles found him in. Even as the Prowler on earth-616, that Hobie Brown was as an upstanding citizen as any crook could be. But flashes of earth-42 kept sparking up right behind his eyes every time doubt popped up about a new player in his life here on earth-1610, and one can never just assume anyways.
And now Miles is sitting at his lunch table with his best friend— who, until now was the only living person on this planet who knew about his secret identity— ruminating on whether or not Ganke might end up being a damn seer after all. Ganke doesn’t know that Hobie knows, but he really just might be right anyhow. That would really be Miles' luck.
Goddamnit.
Is Hobie planning on blackmailing him somehow? His involvement with those thugs stealing a prominent museum’s precious security info seemed a bit off to him, the more he thought about it.
They joked about it many a time over text, but Miles would be lying if he said he hadn’t turned a couple of facts over and over on more than one sleepless night. Hobie mentioned having connections, a camera, and seemed almost too recklessly opportunistic when it came to the chance at nabbing that flash drive...
Doubt was sinking back in. Miles drummed his fingers on the table and shot Ganke a look. “... Whaddya think I should do if he does, then?”
“What, if he finds out?”
“Yeah.”
Ganke shrugs again, popping a pepperoni slice into his mouth and thinking while he chewed. “Web him up to a lamppost,” he said after a bit.
Miles snorted with laughter. “Ganke, be for real right now. You’ve got great coding and social media knowledge, dude. Could you hack his tech if asked you to? Like, just in case?”
Ganke waggled his head, making a show of really, really thinking it through. “Mmmmn, yeah maybe.”
Miles sighs. “What do I have to do?” He asks because he knows his best friend by now.
“Fifty bucks and you also have to do my laundry for a week. What?” Ganke exclaims upon suddenly being on the receiving end of Miles’ glare, “If I get caught, it could mean like federal level charges on my head, dude. Take it up with the law, not me!”
Miles sighs and returns back to his plate of cold fries. “Yeah, yeah. You got a point,”
“But you gotta meet up with him first, figure out what we're dealing with. Just stop putting it off, bro. Avoiding him'll make you look more suspicious. Might as well get it done and over with,”
Miles swallows his fries along with his anxiety, picks up his phone, and starts drafting his answer to Hobie’s sudden proposal.
He doesn't know why there's a pit of dread in his stomach, but he opts to ignore it this time.
He hopes Ganke is wrong.
♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧
The next day, MJ's cell phone vibrates on the portable vanity set up at the studio where his current shoot is taking place.
He’s busy, trying not to get too lost in the flurry of hands prepping him, the flashing of the cameras, the shouts of directions from the camera guy as he hits pose after pose with the props on set.
It’s when he’s changing into his last outfit for the shoot that he finally has some time to sip his water bottle and mindlessly scroll through dozens of notifications, finally coming across the one notif he waited to get the entire day: Miles. His name appeared at the very bottom.
... Meaning he received the message hours ago. Shit.
With his shoot almost over, MJ punched in a quick message and hit send, excitedly returning back to the set and finishing his work day up as quickly as humanly possible.
MJ's absentmindedly agreeing that every picture the director shows him is truly amazing, yes, amazing indeed, all while trying not to vibrate out of his mind-numbingly expensive designer outfit he’s been forced into. The only person he can think about as he dumbly nods along to whatever the crew is saying to him is Miles. Miles, Miles, Miles.
Miles has agreed to finally-- finally, after all of these weeks-- meet up with him and make good on his promise. Of course, MJ's slightly miffed that it had to be him to initiate the lunch date in the end, but whatever.
Closed mouths don’t get fed, after all. And Miles was technically not breaking his promise.
So now MJ is floating back down the hallway to the makeup room, gently pushing past all of the other models and swatting away at his mother’s hands while he makes his way over to his duffle bag.
“MJ, darling. Look at me,” his mother says as she hooks a finger under his chin and examines his makeup. “Do you wanna be wearing this when you go hang out with your little friend today?”
Your little friend, MJ almost scoffs out loud, but manages to school his expression into one of pure professionalism. “Yes, mom. Nothin' wrong with it,” he answers breezily.
She hovers. "I mean, it might make your friend think that... uhm, well. You know, it might give the wrong impression. He'll think you two are on a date! You're not allowed to date."
"Sure, mom. Except he knows I'm a model. The whole city does at this point." His tone drips with teenage attitude.
She lets him go.
Then, he’s unbuttoning his shirt and untying a sparkly scarf doubling as a belt to hold up the comically baggy jeans he was assigned to wear today, impatient to shrug himself out of those clothes and jump into his own so he can finally, finally, finally run down to the little cafe he told Miles to meet him at.
His mother was busy on a tablet typing away at something, chatting with MJ's agent once he found his way over to them, and even when neither of them noticed much about MJ on any other day, it seemed they were paying special attention to the way he was throwing his clothes back on with obvious glee now.
MJ had never smiled this much around them, and they sure took note of it now.
“Heard you’re getting ready to meet with a friend, MJ,” his agent told him once he turned his attention back to his client.
“Yyyep,” MJ answered noncommittally. He threw on a coat and started to reach for his messenger bag, stopping when a hand grabbed his shoulder and squeezed.
“We’re gonna keep in touch with the team, and keep updating you on the status of the shoot, but we gotta make sure you’ve got your phone on, right?” His agent looked him directly in the eye. “It’s great that you’re making friends again, Em, but you have to keep your head in the game.”
Yeah, of course. “Don’t let anything distract you from helping me make money” is what you mean, MJ thought ruefully, blinking back innocently.
He nodded and offered his agent a casual smile. “I mean yeah. He’s just a friend, I’m not gonna let that get in the way of my job. Don’t worry,” he adds, “I got my phone on. Hit me up when something cool happens.”
His agent and his mother exchange glances, but agree to release him anyways.
“I mean, he’s still a kid,” he hears his mother say as he quickly exits the room and finds his way towards the elevators. “I let him have a little fun every once in a while! The real work doesn’t start until he’s older right? Might as well let him have this for now..."
MJ rubs his thumb up and down along the edge of his phone case, feeling the bumps of the volume keys over and over.
He steps into the elevator when the doors slide open. He punches the button for the main lobby and stares down at his messages with Miles.
Yes, he thinks a bit vindictively, the real work doesn’t start until he’s older.
She definitely isn’t wrong about that.
♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧
"You ever think about running away at all?" Hobie asked Miles rather suddenly after they got their usual greetings done and over with.
The cafe Hobie picked was cute, quaint, and very small. A nice little reprieve from the noisy halls of their school and the bustling city streets, since the business didn't seem to have any other patrons at this hour aside from the two boys.
They picked their seats right next to the window and opted to people-watch for a bit as they scrolled through the cafe's stylized menu on their phones. The lighting of the late-afternoon day illuminated Hobie in such gorgeous warm light that Miles was almost suspicious; did he pick this place specifically because the late sun's rays would bounce off of nearby skyscrapers and cast them both in the best mood lighting New York City had to offer? It sure seemed like it.
Hobie leaned back in his seat and gave Miles the most charming smile he's seen on a guy yet, erasing his suspicions from his brain entirely. And... well, anything else as well.
"Uhhh," Miles offered intelligently.
Hobie huffed a laugh in response. "It's okay, I know it's a weird question. Forget I said it."
Miles shook his head. "Wait, no. Sorry, what'd you say again? I'm, uhm. Sorry, I think I'm just a little tired. Kind of out of it,"
Hobie nodded sagely, setting his phone aside for the time being. "Hmm, late night homework, right? Essays maybe?"
They chuckled and grinned at each other cheesily, the knowledge that they shared a big secret between them settling comfortably and cozily like a fat cat curling up near a fireplace. It was nice, kinda. To be in on something that not many other people were, like an inside joke or a long-running bit between old friends.
But then Miles' earlier conversation with Ganke at the school cafeteria floated back up in his mind again and he had to bite his lip to keep from frowning suddenly. He looked down, a bit ashamed.
"Hobie--" he started.
"MJ," Hobie interrupted, chin in his hand now.
Miles looked up. "MJ. Oh, yeah. Right, sorry."
"I don't really like my given name, so no one calls me that. Just call me MJ. Or Em, even. That's what my agent calls me."
"Agent. Geez. So you didn't really answer my question earlier, back when we first met," here, Miles folded his arms on the table in front of him. "How famous are you, really?"
MJ grinned like a mischievous cat, chin still in one hand. "You've been on my Flicksta page this entire time since you found it. How famous do you think I am? Not that hard to do research nowadays, right?"
Miles felt his face heating up. "H-how'd you know about that?"
"You liked a post of mine that I made like... last year, dude. I saw."
Miles silently cursed himself out as he shut his eyes in embarrassment and winced. "Yikes. Alright, I guess you caught me. That was my bad for sure!"
MJ's grin was crooked. "Yeah, I'm... pretty well-known. Not supermodel status yet obviously, but I've been on a couple billboards. Posters, some ads. I'm training to walk some shows. Whatever." He leaned back in his seat again and messed with his sweater's sleeves a little as he spoke. Distantly, Miles noticed how expensive MJ's clothing really looked, how plush the knit of his sweater was, and the tailoring of his coat.
"Whatever," Miles echoed inquisitively. "Do you hate it? Is that why you wanna run away?"
They met eyes.
"I thought I told you to forget that question, Morales," MJ replies coolly. "It was a weird one. I dunno why I even said it,"
Miles, sensing something in the air between them, wondered if he should have changed the subject. Too bad his mouth had a less-than-stellar track record of listening to his brain.
Instead, he opened it and quietly said: "If we're gonna be friends, and if you want me to not web you up to a pole somewhere in Manhattan, I gotta know your deal."
"Mn, my deal," MJ repeated warily.
"Yeah," Miles sighed, already resigning himself to just getting this over and done with already. No time like the present, right? "You mentioned... you mentioned having a camera and connections. And you're just... weird, man. Like, no offense but you being in Central Park when you were that one time? Running away from those gang members who looked like they were gonna strangle you for takin' their flash drive away from 'em? That was super risky. Something's up."
MJ nodded, still looking apprehensive but also like he wanted to give in. "Right, I've got your big secret. Now you wanna have one of mine. Fair, I guess."
Miles shrugged helplessly. "If we're gonna be friends... I mean, it is fair, right?"
MJ glanced around at the empty seats around them, grateful that even the cashier seems to have gone to the back so that they were both totally alone together. Good spot to pick after all, he thought to himself. He kept his voice down just in case anyways.
He licked his lips and leaned his elbows on the table. "Yeah. I get it. It's a big thing you're doing for the city, y'know... doin' what you do. So here it is: I hate being a model."
Miles blinked at him, waiting for more. MJ didn't immediately being speaking again so he made a go on kind of motion with a hand.
MJ laughed a bit, shaking his head. "This is gonna be stupid. It's gonna sound so stupid! God," he rubbed the bridge of his nose with a knuckle and looked outside at a small stream of people walking past, all in a hurry to get on with whatever it was that occupied their lives.
"... About as stupid as some kid from Brooklyn putting on a costume to go out and fight crime?" Miles smiled patiently.
"Well, kinda. It was because of some punk kid from Brooklyn putting on that costume to go fight crime that I finally had the courage to like, go out there and get into my little hobby of breaking and entering, snooping around places I shouldn't, trying to help people..." MJ stopped when he saw the look on his friend's face.
"You...?" Miles started, his lips forming the shape of the words he wanted to say but not quite letting them out into the open just yet.
Did he hear that right?
As if reading his thoughts, MJ nodded. "When you took up the mantle of Spiderman after our first guy died, I took it as a sign. To like... finally just do it, right? I guess all that was left was just taking the leap, y'know what I mean?"
Miles suppressed a shudder as he nodded along, pushing Peter B's lectures out of his mind for the moment.
"I hate being a model," MJ continued, a single loc falling into his determined face, "because I wanna be a journalist. Like... an investigative journalist. But I also like science stuff as well. I guess I dunno what I really wanna be when I'm older. All I know is... I have got to get away from my overbearing mom."
"Or else," Miles finishes for him, tilting his head as if to say remember our conversation at the park?
MJ grimly confirmed it. "Or else," he replied.
Miles blew out a breath and leaned all the way back in his own seat, folding his arms over his chest. "Wow."
"Yeah, heavy stuff. I know," MJ tossed his locs back over his shoulders and glanced up at the posted menu hanging high above the register. The cashier returned from the back, placing several different pastries from a baking tray into the cafe's clean little glass display at the counter.
"Wanna...?" MJ pointed his chin at them, already pushing his chair out to get up.
"Oh, yeah. Food! Duh," Miles answered and got up to follow suit. How could he possibly forget?
The rest of their hangout goes over wonderfully after the grim conversation, all things considered. They opt to chat amicably about surface-level stuff mostly; family dynamics, friends, schoolwork and more about MJ's day job as a model.
"My mom acts like she's my agent most days, too." MJ is recounting this in between sips of his black coffee, long fingers nursing the ceramic cup he was given. "She's the one who got me into these modeling gigs in the first place. She said I had 'the look'... whatever that means. I like bein' behind the camera, though. Not in front of it," he lamented.
Miles spears some lettuce that fell out of his sandwich with the toothpick his side of pickle came with, waving it around as he talks. "Your mom sounds like the type of parent that pushes their kids around a lot. I guess I would know what that's like,"
Sensing a chance to commiserate in their shared dilemma, MJ leans forward a bit and smiles. "Your folks sounded nice when you described them. What's up?"
"I love them, and they sure do love me, but," Miles shakes his head and picks the lettuce off of his toothpick. "I dunno. They want the best for me and... sometimes it feels like nothing else matters but that."
MJ has the lower half of his face carefully hidden behind his mug when he asks: "Have you told them?"
Miles sighed, long and loud. "Yep. Yeah. They know. They do. That was... a very long story but. Anyways, yeah, after all the stuff that went down this spring, I finally had to fess up. No one else knows but you guys, though, I swear."
Miles silently patted himself on the back for managing to completely omit Ganke from the conversation. Can't give up his ace up his sleeve so soon, now can he?
Tumblr media
MJ nods sympathetically. "I wasn't kidding, you know. Back when I told you that your secret was safe with me. You've got one of mine, so. No one else but us,"
Miles raises a pinkie over their plates and makes eye contact with him. "Pinkie promise?"
MJ's eyes flash at him.
"Duh. I never break promises," he replies, hooking pinkies together and smiling. "I'm not really in the business of ruining the life of a pretty great hero right now."
"Until it benefits you, you mean," Miles says, really only half-joking.
MJ doesn't take the bait. Instead, he deflects the best way he knows how. "Oh yeah, absolutely. If someone's out there putting a billion-dollar bounty on your head someday, you already know I'm goin' for it. What? It's a billion dollars, dude!"
They laugh together as Miles throws a piece of tomato in his direction and MJ threatens to pour the rest of his coffee onto his lap.
It felt good, felt natural. Their banter was smooth and seamless which Miles thought was a relief because very few people he encountered in life wanted to keep up with his constant sarcasm and nerdy jokes. No one else seemed to share his sense of humor except for MJ, and it made him feel a bit of warmth in his chest.
Even if they only stayed friends, he seemed to be a great companion to have nonetheless. And Miles had Ganke as backup in case anything went wrong between them. It was a daunting thing to come to terms with, the fact that such a cool guy like Hobie M. Jones had the ability to stab him behind his back at any moment's notice, or accidentally let Miles' secret double life as the crime-fighting webslinger out at the most inopportune time.
But... it wouldn't be the first time a friend has double-crossed him.
Miles wasn't stupid. He knew that letting more and more people in on his secret identity was a huge gamble, especially when it came to keeping a secret as big as this was. The risk was too high, the rewards might not even be worth it.
Worst of all, his friends could be legit and then get hurt if they ever found themselves somehow caught in the crosshairs of his other life.
... But Miles didn't want to think about that right now. That was a problem for future him. Right now, they were both too busy being what neither of their own families seemed to want them to be: a pair of carefree kids.
In this moment, MJ didn't have to worry about stifling and busy schedules arranged for him without his consent. He didn't have to worry about itchy fabrics or ill-fitting designer clothes or loud and bright cameras capturing his every move. With Miles, he could finally let loose.
And in this moment, Miles didn't have to worry about crime-fighting (for now), juggling mountains of schoolwork to please his parents, or keeping up appearances so he didn't arouse suspicions as to where he always was when he managed to slip away. With MJ, he could relax a little and enjoy the small things that always escaped his notice as he rushed this way and that, desperately trying to keep up with the chaos of his everyday life. Time seemed to slow down and speed up simultaneously when they were together.
They finished up their meal and exited the cafe, thanking the cashier and pulling on their coats to hopefully battle the frigid winter air of the city. They made their way up and down blocks, past shops and restaurants, weaving in and out of passing crowds on the sidewalk.
As they wandered aimlessly, unable to escape each other's gravitational pull for even one second, they talked some more.
They talked about Miles' art, MJ's secret science experiments in his room and how he fought his mom to get into Visions in the first place, about Miles' parents and his daily workload he usually juggles. They tried talking about Miles' start as Spiderman, but they didn't get too far along that topic before realizing there were only so many code words they could use to say what they wanted to say out loud before devolving into a fit of giggles.
They chatted about their plans after they graduate, how Miles still wants to go to Princeton and how MJ is planning on funding his own college education once he saves up enough money to leave his station in life and go wherever the wind takes him.
Miles seemed a bit sad at the thought that their friendship looked to have an eventual expiration date in the future, but there didn't seem to be anything changing MJ's mind anytime soon. After all, he didn't even know if he was going to keep in touch with Ganke once they stopped being roommates. And they ended up being pretty tight, against all odds.
So as they kept their casual pace through the city, Miles made a mental note to remember and cherish days like these as much as he could. He checked his phone for the time... this blissful moment of normalcy would have to end soon.
"So," Miles said once their long conversation eventually wound down. Their feet had taken them to a nearby subway station, the gum-covered concrete steps already beckoning them both to bid each other adieu.
"So..." MJ glanced at him, stopping them both by the railing and smiling down at his friend.
The day was drawing to a close, the sun had fully set about half an hour ago and they both needed to get out of the streets and back to their regular everyday lives. For Miles, this meant he had to get at least an hour of patrolling in before swinging back to his dorm room and getting started on his studies for their chem test on Monday.
For MJ, it meant returning back to Manhattan and steeling himself in preparation for the eventual lecture he knew he was going to get, about not staying out so late without supervision and how he didn't respond in time to his agent's texts. The usual.
"I hate to say it, but it's lookin' like we might have to say goodbye for now," Miles shrugged, hanging his head for comical effect.
MJ laughed brightly. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you sound like you don't even wanna leave."
"You might be right about that. Wish me luck tonight, I gotta... y'know," Miles leaned casually as he could manage against the railing, shrugging a shoulder.
"Right. Do your extracurriculars,"
Miles groaned. "Yuck. Let's not call it that, please! You sound like my dad. Let's just call it my weird hobby instead."
"Okay, so I guess I gotta let you go to do your weird hobby instead, then."
"Which just so happens to be graffiti, by the way," Miles' lips quirk up mischievously, giving MJ a look as he slowly slides against the railing and places a foot on the first step. "I like to spray paint around the city every now and then... in case anyone wants to know. In case they ask."
MJ bobs his head in response, following Miles' movements. "Ah, right. Spray painting! Super cool. Anyone asks where you are, I got your back, man."
Miles' smile is as dazzling as it is endearing as he places a hand on the metal railing and lowers himself some more, unable to bring himself to cut the invisible rope anchoring him and MJ together, holding them there in that one space as a constant stream of New Yorkers climb up and down the steps beside them.
Thank you New York City, Miles finds himself thinking.
No one glanced in their direction, they were completely surrounded by people, but still alone. The lights of nearby shop signs and street lamps gave MJ a bit of a halo around his hair, and from the angle he was standing at, Miles looked up at it and believed that it made him just glow.
They gazed deeply into each other's eyes, the usual noise of the city falling easily into the background. It was just the two of them.
"... Yeah." Miles says a bit awkwardly, unable to pull away. "Yeah, that sounds... good. Great. Thanks man! You're a real one,"
MJ smiles knowingly above him. "So you might wanna head on down now. Don't wanna keep you from catching your train."
Miles grins back. "Right. My train."
"Go get 'em, Tiger." MJ responds, offering him a little salute with his fingers and finally turning away to disappear into the thick crowds that flowed up and down the city sidewalks like water.
After a little bit, Miles felt like he could breathe normally again.
He descended down.
♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧
Miles' life went right back to normal, with a new element added in.
He still rushed through his days of back-breaking homework and tests, still tried to keep up with the crime-fighting and his family back home who kept pestering him with exclamations about how he was always late to events and get-togethers, especially as the holidays rolled around.
(His mother pulled him aside for a quick little chat on how he needs to get better at communicating where he was so that she and Jeff could make up excuses for him ahead of time)
He still gamed mindlessly with Ganke on most weekends after their school break ended and the students all traveled back to their dorms, he still texted his extra-dimensional friends whenever he was free and had a minute to spare.
But now he made some space for another special person in his life: Hobie M. Jones.
They passed notes back and forth in the classes they shared like a pair of friends back in elementary school (to avoid leaving a trail of evidence on their phones, Miles argued when he brought it up to MJ, who just laughed) and walked each other to their classes whenever they could.
But it was risky business keeping someone like MJ so close, especially if it could arouse suspicion when Spiderman happened to swoop in and save him out of the blue. Both Miles and Spiderman hovering around MJ's vicinity day in and day out could be a possible liability to contend with indeed, so Miles still tried keeping his distance whenever possible.
For what it was worth, MJ seemed to understand. He was also occasionally followed by cameras from online fans in the real world or opportunistic reporters looking to try and pry precious info of a new marketing campaign MJ happened to be a part of, so this kind of life wasn't new to him either.
Thankfully, he agreed it was best to only get together in private.
As the months flew by, exams and assignments came and went, but their friendship only flourished.
Miles found himself admitting some surprising things to MJ on late-night text conversations when he couldn't sleep and needed to hop out of his dorm window to burn some energy. He found himself doodling his friend in his sketchbook often, unable to scrub the images of his flawless modeling photos from his brain.
He found himself... doodling their names together on hastily discarded sticky notes and coming up with illegible graffiti so he can mash their names together on stickers and shamelessly slap them up onto signs, onto walls, onto bathroom stalls and stairwells and notebooks and poles and bus stops and--
Miles startled out of a reverie as he was balancing himself on a random window ledge somewhere in the city, fully suited up, sketchbook in hand as he doodled little hearts around a profile study of MJ. Tucked under the page he was working on was an embarrassing amount of stickers with his and MJ's last names on them.
God. The humiliation he would face if MJ ever got his hands on this book. His mind flashes back to the sheer embarrassment he felt back when Gwen suddenly dropped down into his room from a portal and began to leaf through his old sketchbook, finding one too many drawings of her own face in the pages.
The memories snapped him out of his weird love-induced haze and forced him to shamefully fold over the corner of the page and hide those little hearts.
First, you ran away from him after you figured out he was an MJ, now you're obsessed with him. ¿Quién te puedes entender?
The sound of Miles' conscience was taking the harsh shape of his mother's voice. Not good.
He sighed and shut his sketchbook, shoving it into his backpack that was webbed onto the wall right next to him. Crime never slept, but it did have its ebbs and flows that Miles found himself in tune with as the months went by. This hour on a Thursday evening happened to be one of the slower hours for crime fighting, it seemed.
Regardless, he yanked his bag from its sticky confines and brushed the webs off, straightening himself up from his position and mindlessly checking his phone for any pressing updates.
Finding none, and with nothing much else to do... he sent MJ a quick text.
Miles: Busy rn?
He knocked himself on the forehead for it, knowing he might regret what he was about to propose but... he couldn't get the guy out of his head. He was dreaming about MJ on the regular now, which was never a good sign. Might as well see if he was up to doing any crazy last-minute stunts since the heart seemed to want what it wanted.
The reply came almost immediately after.
MJ: Nope, just surrounded by a pile of annoying hw, why do you ask?
Miles grinned as he typed a quick reply, hit send, and shot a web up to climb to the roof of the building.
Miles: I'm thinking I'm like... about a 15 mins walk away from your place. Wanna hang? I can swing by
He can almost taste the eye roll in MJ's replies, which made him smile beneath his mask.
MJ: You're corny as hell and that's exactly why you're my friend
MJ: Just give me a few to get ready
Miles sends back an affirmative, and tucks his phone right into his bag's side pocket which he then throws over a shoulder. He turns towards the general direction that MJ's penthouse apartment is located, right over the Brooklyn Bridge.
On his way there, he rehearses all of the coolest lines he could think of, not quite hoping to impress his friend or anything, but hoping that maybe MJ won't see him for the weird dork everyone else treats him as. And... to also keep him from suspecting anything or whatever.
They've hung out together countless times before, after their initial meetup. And not once did flawless-fashionable-cool-model MJ make him feel like he was ever uncool or off-putting. Maybe that was why Miles was so infatuated with him, when it came down to it. Still a good idea to play it safe, just in case.
It would have served Miles much better if he gave this friendship an even wider berth, retained his mysterious reputation... but there was something so arresting about MJ's eyes, his mannerisms and gentleness that contrasted so sharply with his quick wit, surprising bravery and intelligence.
Miles can shoot off the wittiest lines on the planet, but at the end of the day, he was still a boy with a crush. Alas.
In the time that he vaulted around NYC as Earth-1610's Spiderman, Miles developed a knack for snappy one-liners that MJ seemed to find endearing. Whenever they were together, they often fell into good-natured jabs and quips at each other, and he was so enamoured by it.
And it seemed like they just... naturally fell into the gravity of each other's orbit often anyways. Miles would look up into a crowd anywhere at Visions and immediately be able to find MJ. Like he developed an MJ-sense alongside his own spidery ones.
Two twin stars locked in orbit, a binary system forever hurtling through space together.
God, he really needed to get it together. That was super cheesy even for him, and he watched Titanic on his laptop damn near a hundred times at this point.
The thought had him yanking on his webs much harder and flying through the late evening air just to burn off the heat that built up in his gut.
He had to quickly remind himself that regardless of whatever happened between them, he promised that he would forever cherish it all. Miles wasn't an idiot, he knew that being Spiderman put a dampener on a lot of his relationships in life. It was a constant tug-of-war between him and his parents, and Ganke often reminds him of how absent he is at school, even when he's present.
Whatever happens between him and MJ in the future is whatever happens. Miles has already made peace with the inevitability of reality, like he so often needed to in this life. No need to get his hopes up.
Sobering up, Spiderman does several somersaults in the air before attaching a web onto the corner of MJ's swanky high-rise located not too far from the bridge. He sticks to the reflective glass and lets gravity do all the work for him as he drops down a few stories, hoping he was just a quick black blur that could be chalked up to just being a bird of some kind in case anyone happened to glance out their windows.
He hasn't been over to MJ's apartment at all, but knows the building from the outside very well thanks to the two friends' prior escapades. MJ's mom was strict according to him, and after sneaking them both out of the window to go to a mall or hang out at a park, swing around the city a bit and then drop MJ off back home, Spiderman was well acquainted with his bedroom window as a result.
He finds it again effortlessly and hangs upside down by a web, slowly lowering himself into view.
MJ's eyes light up immediately upon seeing him. He perks up, gets up from his computer chair to carefully lock the bedroom door and moves right back to his window.
"Well hello there, Spiderman! Glad you could make it." MJ smiles warmly, keeping his voice down. "Sorry, mom and the team are in the living room and I just told her I'm lockin' myself in here to study as hard as I can. Finals coming up and all... but we don't have too much time."
"Which is why you're only stepping out for a bit of air, right? Real quick, I promise." Spiderman replies good-naturedly. "It'll help clear your head."
MJ huffs out a laugh and shakes his head. "Where would I be without you?"
"It's Spiderman's job to help all of the citizens of New York... and you look like you could use it, so,"
MJ slides his window open even wider, already throwing a leg over the sill. "My hero."
Together, they drop down a few stories, just free-falling and enjoying the chill of the late evening for a few seconds, shrouded by the dusk's descent that was already darkening the vast sky above them.
MJ gasps breathlessly when Spiderman shoots out a web and sends them sailing over congested streets filled to the brim with cars and trucks, over tall street lamps and past bright digital billboards advertising all kinds of products.
They zoom past more buildings, arcing gracefully around corners. At one point, MJ dares to loosen a grip on Spiderman's shoulders and splay his fingers out against the wind.
They fly together like birds for a minute more, soaring through the air and then rounding right back on the path they carved into it so Spiderman could deposit his friend right back home.
MJ said they didn't have much time, right? And Miles was satisfied with their short little hangout anyhow. He got his hands on his crush, had him clinging onto his arms and his neck the entire time they were airborne. It was getting late and he had to head back to Visions himself as well.
"Take me up to the roof real quick," MJ pants into his ear. Miles tries very hard not to think too much about that as he wordlessly follows orders and makes a beeline for the roof access.
Together, they land near the edge, overlooking the concrete jungle that was Manhattan, surrounded on all sides by tall buildings that seemed to reach up to heavens, still much taller than MJ's own building.
It was a miracle they weren't seen together, but that might've been because of the glitter and glitz of the city night all around them. New Yorkers never really looked up anyways.
Below them, the traffic and the bustle of the city continued at its usual pace; a constant thrum of vibrations, sounds and lights as they flowed up and down the streets like blood cells traveling through veins.
Both boys leaned their elbows onto the roof's raised edge and peered all around them, enjoying their temporary peace, catching their breath.
"I'm real glad I met you, you know?" MJ says, uncharacteristically sincere. His face was an open door now, but he was still unable to meet Spiderman's eyes.
Miles thought it might be appropriate to keep his mask on for now.
"Man, I only swung us around for like a few minutes. You don't need to confess your love for me, I'll take a thanks as payment. That's all." He joked but still tried to keep the sarcasm light. Didn't want to ruin the moment, after all.
MJ offered a crooked smirk at that, but then sobered up again. "Nah, really, man. I mean it. I'm not sure where I'd be right now if I hadn't transferred over to Visions and literally bumped into you. Crazy how life works like that, huh?"
"Right, especially since you were my biggest fan before that," Miles reminds him. "Serendipity or whatever."
MJ nods slowly. "Serendipity. Yeah... exactly. Sorry. What did you just say?"
Caught off guard, Miles hesitates for a bit. Play dumb, Morales!
"Uhh, what did I just say?"
MJ laughs, punching Miles on the arm before folding his own arms over his chest. "I was a fan of the old Spiderman before you came along. When he died..." he averts his eyes, studying his shoes. "Yeah, that sucked. But then you came along out of the blue... anyways. I just took it as a sign, that's all."
Miles dramatically wilts against the side of the roof. "Daaamnn, bro. I just swung you around the city for a bit! I gave you a free ride, and I don't even get to be your favorite? I see how it is."
MJ bursts out laughing. "Don't worry, Spiderman," he says, holding up his hands placatingly. "You're on your way to replacing him soon enough! Keep giving me those free rides. And uh... thanks," he finishes lamely, raising his hand to shoot his friend a salute. "Yeah. Thanks. For this."
They smile sheepishly at each other for a few seconds and Miles swears he's going to start roasting alive in his suit pretty soon from the way the warmth in his chest was radiating outward towards every limb.
Butterflies were swirling inside of his gut and he swears he can hear the sappy music from a romance movie Miles watched recently playing somewhere near them. Maybe now was the time to... stop avoiding his feelings? Take that leap of faith, right?
He's done it many times before. This time was probably no different than any other time where he's been thrown way out of his comfort zone only to be kinda glad it happened, in retrospect.
He opened his mouth and started to speak at the same time MJ did.
"So, Em--"
"Uh, so--"
They jumped in unison, wide eyes meeting wide lenses. MJ dipped his head.
"Oh, sorry I was--" Miles chuckled, bopping his forehead with a hand. "S-sorry, what were you gonna say?"
He winced at the jarring awkwardness of it all. The sappy music went silent, the mood thoroughly ruined.
"Oh, well, uh--" MJ looked just as flustered as Miles felt. "N-nah, sorry, I was just gonna say that... that it's been a little while now. So I should probably be heading back," he gestured awkwardly over his shoulder towards the side of the building, trailing off.
"Riiiight, right. Yeah, duh. Of course. Just, uh," Miles turns so his back is facing his friend, gesturing at it as if to say hop on. "Lost track of time, I guess. My bad,"
"What were you gonna say?" MJ asks, right next to Miles' ear as always.
Silently, Miles tucks that part of himself away again for later.
He was really 100% willing to risk it all and go for it, just fully display all of that for a measly chance at getting to date the most popular kid at school right now, and one of the coolest people that he's ever met. He would kick himself if he weren't carrying him right there on his back.
What a stupid idea, Miles. Real dumb, even for you.
In a fraction of a second, he stuffs his emotions right back down in him. Time and place. Not the time, not the place, he reasons. They'd just met a few months ago, and they got off on a pretty rocky start. It just wasn't the time to be making such rash decisions. Yeah, that was it.
"Nah, forget it. I think I was just gonna ask if you wanted to come with me and Ganke to our favorite comic shop this weekend, but that's a dumb question--"
MJ suddenly squeezed his hands tighter around Miles' shoulders. "Duh! It's a dumb question because the answer is obviously yes, of course."
"You like comic books!? Since when?" Miles exclaimed in shock.
"I'm beating you as the top student in chem class right now. You are not nerdier than me. Stop playin' with me." MJ grumbles grumpily. He digs his chin vindictively into Miles' shoulder.
Miles' loud bark of laughter echoed off the rooftop as he takes a running leap towards the ledge, hops on it and promptly sends them plummeting several stories down.
MJ's cry echoed around them even louder.
After about a minute or so, MJ's back inside of his room and they're both trying very hard to suppress laughter so hard that their cheeks hurt and they're crying tears.
Thankfully, outside of the bedroom door, MJ's family never heard a thing.
#spiderverse#punkflower#miles morales#hobie brown#it started off angsty and then i had to go and be all sappy about it baaawwww#i reread a lot of this story trying to regain the memories of what exactly i wrote before and man that first chapter sure was a bummer huh#i was like.... maaannnn these boys have to put up with SO MUCH and i need them to just be kids again for my sanity#as a treat#yeah i hope y'all enjoyed and also thanks so much for being so patient with me if you've been waiting for updates OTL#guess how i'm trying to stay sane this winter! i'm writing about wholesome fluffy sappy maybe-but-maybe-not boyfriends i fuckin guess#will they won't they... i think that's how you sum up spidermanxMJ dynamics in four words right?#but yeah i think y'all already know that these 2 are endgame in my heart no matter what#so its not like i'm leaving a devastating cliffhanger or anything lol :p#a lot inspired these two dorks and their fluffy and frustrating relationship and that is: mj and peter in the mcu movies#i felt like they were a p good summation of what a young and closed off mj would be like with a dorky nerd who has a big secret#and also just. miles. and his relationships in the comics in general. gosh he is simply too sweet...#they're two teens still figuring shit out yanno? maybe they'll have their romance in college lol#and andrew garfield and emma stone's relationship was also so cute... idk i just love a lil rivalry going between partners too sue me#i can see a rivalry happening between this spiderman and mj for surrrre#so many options to choose from!!#anyways thx for reading!#mi writing#clown paint
17 notes · View notes
icewindandboringhorror · 2 years ago
Text
Just curious what the average level of personal investment in these sorts of things is. Like, how much do people usually get into silly stuff like this their friends ask of them? etc. etc. Which I know, only surveying a small sample on a very specific website means I'm not getting an exact average idea lol, but.. curious nonetheless .. Maybe reblog for bigger sample size but also this is not very serious at all/not worth a call to action gbhjbhjb
#which I know this could be context dependent like.. maybe you'd normally dress up but on a week that#you feel sick you wouldn't or etc. etc. - but I mean.. GENERALLY. in the most general average scenario#where you have the average amount of health and free time that you always do. etc. just based on your personality#and level of investment in these things - what on AVERAGE are you most inclined to do#also of course assume they communicate with you ahead of time and are not like planning a part last minute#like 'throw together costume in 5 hours and show up tonight randomly' or etc. I would hope that if we're going with the#AVERAGE of things - most people's friends have better communication skills than springing entire parties#on people last minute lol#assume you have like.. a few days-a week or so to prepare. however ealrly people usually start talking about#birthdays. In my experience it's usually one or two weeks ahead of time. Like 'oh next weekend' or 'oh two weeks from now' etc.#ANYWAY.. feeling a little Sick again of course but still trying to get some photos or something posted#AGAIN i promise I am not going to exlcusively post polls and ntohing else forever hgkjgnekj#I just really really love the ability to post polls and have always my whole life been obsessed with surveying people#I used to think I wanted to do that as a career somehow like.. be one of the people that does psychological interviews#or produce interview asessments for a company or etc. etc. I am always the one friend in the group thats giving out custom made#surveys or asking for other simialr stuff (did you ever take an mbti quiz? how about enneagra#m?? oh yeah I know they're not really scientifically valid or antyhing but like... DID you take them?? huh?? did you??please?? ghjj)#I simply cannot resist.. posting a little poll every once in a while.. as a treat#whilst I still fall behind on like actual content and costumes and stuff gbjhbjh#New poll adventure should be not as much of a wait as the last one was though since I already have the writing#for it really. I just have to do the ms paint sketch. hopefully no unexpected other health issues will get in the way#*** *** ***#< (anytime I do these three star patterns it is an ocd compulsion not me bleeping out words or something just ignore it lol)#(it means something secret in my evil brain just pretend you do not see it. significant only to me)#BUT YEAH.. ... poll... what type of costume party atendee are you?#:0c
694 notes · View notes
waynes-multiverse · 2 days ago
Text
Oh, for sure they shipped that kid off to Mrs. Brooks as soon as she fainted. Ben probably threw him outta the car on the way home lol. And he had definitely developed a hatred for the bedroom door 😂🩷
Tumblr media
snorts What a good comeback, though surprised Ben acknowledged that so easily. 😝
Haha I actually gave Rehab a reread to get a feel for them again, and he grew increasingly more self-deprecating toward the end 😆 (He also knows that arguing about this with his wife who literally knows would be useless lol)
God I'm so relieved!! You had me going there for a while. 😭 But with your promise of a happy ending here I held onto my seat and kept calm.
Tumblr media
Honestly, my heart couldn't have taken it either after everything I've put them through 🙈💕
Also I love that eating enough to feed a small army was part of her recuperation lolll. Talk about ravenous -- but I have a feeling she's craving something else now. 😏❤️‍🔥
Bahaha yes, it's been a while for both of them 😏 At least she's not a supe anymore, and Ben can relax a little more 😂🔥
Tumblr media
LOLL honestly I'm kind of with him on that one. Why is everything labelled a "kink" nowadays? ���🤣🤣
Oh, so true! Thank you gramps for saying what we can't 😂 (But seriously, breeding kink used to be just baby fever. Like, am I wrong??? lol)
Wayne omggg! Seeing your note at the end, I DO remember sending you that Ask!! I'm so happy to see it done here because it's absolutely perfect for these two and this moment. Thank you for using the idea! 🥹💓 Deep down, Gramps just wants to be made love to, and you gave him his heart's desire. 😘
So happy you enjoyed what I did with it! Thank you so much for giving me that prompt, Alex!! I really could see this for them, especially since they've been more on the wilder, experimental side, so this was a nice switch and they seemed to both really need that. Not me getting sappy explaining goddamn smut lmao 😭😭
*snorts* 🤭😏 I see you, Wayne.
Tumblr media
Also on brand that he'd be such an ungrateful whiny sourpuss on his birthday. 🙄
Ikr? 😂 And I genuinely think it was all the reasons you mentioned. Getting older, being over birthdays in general because it's been goddamn too many, and then no super blow job?! Tsk, poor man-child...
YES. I have this headcanon too, that this is the only way to manipulate him into doing what you want. Especially when he's being a prima donna. 🤣
Hahaha totally! This is why we're still the smarter gender, even though we forget feminism with SB 🤣🤣
Tumblr media
GOD he's so dumb for this loll. That's actually a really cute way to tell hubby you have a bun in the oven. 🥹
I broke down laughing writing this because I could see him totally not catching on 😂😂 (Also when has that man actually ever seen a pregnancy test from this century? lol)
But I thought the idea was sweet. I've seen a couple of people do this in reels over the years, and men generally take forever to read a test correctly (and its implications lol). I swear the video I made of my husband still makes me laugh so hard because he had no fucking clue what I was trying to tell him 🤣🤣
Tumblr media
(And I have a few more drabbles planned for them, including Benny 🥰)
Thank you so much for reading and all your sweet comments, friend!! 🥹🩵🩷 I honestly can't wait for a little reading break after this and dive into your HC about Man Flu because I feel that title in my bones lmfao 😂
Lover – Part 3
Tumblr media
Series Summary: Free from his past, Ben’s trying to move on and find a little drop of happiness in this new world. But when he finally holds everything he ever wanted in his hands, it threatens to slip through the cracks, and he has to fight one final time with everything he’s got to keep it.
🫡 Catch up here! Sequel to Rehab & Video Games.
Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x female!Reader
Warnings: 18+ due to language & mature themes, established relationship, Soldier Boy x wife!reader, human!Soldier Boy, the fluffiest of fluff, the smuttiest of smut (watch out for the breeding kink lol) 😉
Word Count: 3.2k
A/N: Happy Valentine's Day to you all, loves! 💕 Thank you so much for all your wonderful comments over the last few days. I've seen and appreciate them all and will catch up with you guys over the weekend 🥰 For now, excuse this poor mama, 'cause she is fucking beat 😂
Enjoy the happy end 🩵
Main Masterlist || Series Masterlist || Tag List
Tumblr media
Part 3: Lovestruck
Three fucking days he had waited in front of that goddamn door.
He slept in front of that door, ate in front of that door, and he silently panicked in front of that door. He hated that fucking door, had raging murder fantasies about it, but he never, ever opened said fucking door, no matter how much his fingers were twitching. Mostly because every time his hand did wrap around the knob, she’d yell at him to ‘stay the fuck out.’
Ben only unwillingly complied.
But when the quiet came and all other noises stopped, he finally dared to set a foot inside. The bedroom looked normal, even if disarrayed – but the bathroom surely needed a fucking remodel.
All that remained of their bathtub was a solidified puddle of acrylic. There was also a hole in the floor – burned right through the tiles. He’d wondered why it’d been so cold in there till he'd noticed the giant hole in the wall too that gave a perfect view of their backyard. But he found Y/N resting and curled up on the cool, white tiles – alive.
His heart might have fucking soared higher than an eagle.
When Ben asked her how she felt, she only replied with “Like I fucking survived D-Day.”
At that, Ben had snorted and said, “At least one of us did.”
And when they were both sure the worst was over and she wouldn’t turn the car into bubbling liquid as well, Ben finally drove her to a hospital. She was still weak, mostly from not eating a thing in four days. The doctors thought she must’ve had a severe case of the flu, gave her an IV drip with plenty of nutrients, and then released her after a few tests.
She’s been exhausted since then, drifting in and out of dreamland as he holds her in his embrace. She begins to stir again, and soon enough, she glances tiredly up at him through her eyelashes and gives him a lazy smile when she realizes he’s still here, exactly where he was hours ago when she last woke up.
“How late is it?” she asks and stretches a little in his arms but only ends up snuggling closer to him.
“Close to three,” he replies, and judging by the darkness outside their bedroom window, she guesses he doesn’t mean in the afternoon. “How are you feeling?”
Y/N almost breaks a smile. She can’t remember if he had ever asked this much about her well-being before. Her little brush with death might have shaken his steeled core more than she’d initially figured, and her heart swells slightly at the thought.
Sometimes, she still thinks he only keeps her around because he doesn’t know any better. It’s like getting an abused dog from the shelter – you never know if they really love you or if they only tolerate you because you’re nice enough to feed them.
He’s a creature of habit, after all.
But the affection and genuine worry gleaming in his pine green eyes tells her he might see more in her than that – whatever the hell that is.
“Better.” She nods, letting her fingers trace patterns around the golden freckles on his chest. Much better, she thinks as she feels the familiar heat pool between her legs. She bites down on her lower lip and presses herself closer to his perfectly toned and muscular body. It’s been too long since she’s worshipped every fucking glorious inch of him. “I think the fried chicken and noodles helped,” she adds with a small grin.
He chuckles – but not at her words. He can feel how she’s rubbing her thighs together now to get a little friction.
“Oh, I’m sure the burger, fries, sushi, and tacos helped, too,” he teases her. He came this close to entering her in one of those eating competitions as he watched her empty take-out container after container.
“Don’t forget the churros.” She giggles, and on cue, she rolls fully on top of him and straddles his waist, spreading featherlight kisses along the paths her fingers trailed.
“Not surprising. I already know how much you can stuff in that fucking mouth, doll.” Ben’s wide smirk is full of pride, and it causes her to giggle.
To make his point even clearer, his massive hands smooth down her sides and grip the globes of her ass, grinding her core against his proudly standing member. She mewls into the crook of his neck when she feels how fucking hard he is already. He lets out a grunt that carries the same desperate need to be inside of her as two of his thick fingers delve into her tight channel without much of a warning.
“Fucking drenched,” he mutters appreciatively as she arches her back with another moan on top of him. His free hand winds itself in her hair, giving it a slight tug that parts her lips with a pleasurable hiss as he drags her closer to his face. His amusement doesn’t fade, though, nor do his fingers in her pussy as he works her into a frenzy. “Sure you’re ready enough for the big guns, baby girl?”
She giggles breathily at his relentless teasing. “I’m literally about to come any second now,” she replies, soon followed by a harsh bite of her lip when his calloused thumb finds her clit. “Fuck…”
“Oh, I don’t think you fucking are.” Ben smirks and withdraws his fingers from her heat in the same breath. He laughs a little when she falls against his chest with a whimper of real loss.
Her hand finds his length between their burning bodies and wraps around it, already dragging his tip through her dripping folds. But Ben only entertains her plans for a second before snatching her wrist and pulling her away from him.
She whines this time and looks up at him. “Dear God, what do you want?” A laugh rumbles through his chest at the exasperation on her face. “I’ll do anything you want, anywhere you want. Just tell me. What’s Soldier Boy’s deepest, darkest fantasy, huh?”
Ben knows she’s teasing him, and a smile of amusement twitches on his lips, but a part of him actually seriously considers her question.
“What?” Her brow knits curiously as she observes the contemplative purse of his pillowy lips. “It’s okay. You can tell me,” she assures him and grins cheekily. “How fucking dirty is it?”
Ben swipes his tongue over his teeth and subtly swallows the lump in the back of his throat. He doesn’t reply instantly, however, pulling her ear to his lips as he whispers his little wish.
When he’s done, she blinks at him in surprise (and a hint of amusement). She certainly hasn’t expected that, but she places a loving kiss on his lips. The asshole can be charmingly sweet once in a blue moon.
“You sure about that?” she checks, but her tone is more than a little teasing. “There’s a lot of kinks to pick from.”
“Why does your generation always have to label fucking everything? It’s fucking sex. That’s it.” He huffs a bit too defensively, and she tries her best to muzzle her laugh. “What’s fucking wrong with it?”
“Nothing,” she assures him, giggling, and tries to soothe the furious lines of offense on his brow with little kisses. “It’s just surprising. It’s usually what super-old, married couples do.”
“Well, there you go,” he retorts. “I’m super fucking old and married. You’re gonna keep fucking chit-chatting or are you gonna do it now?”
“Fine, I’ll make love to you,” she relents with a smirk as she voices his little secret out loud.
“Jesus fuck!” He throws his head back into the pillow with a theatric eye roll.
His patience has run out. He grabs her fast and rough and flips them both over in a blink of an eye, her back landing in the plush mattress with a bubble of giggles. His weight presses down on her and deliciously threatens to squeeze the air from her lungs.
“Let me show you how it’s fucking done, my love,” Ben says with a cocky smile and begins to ravage a path of destruction down her throat. She’s sure she’ll be more colorful than a rainbow in the morning.
His teeth nib on her skin, hands pawing at the only clothing item that still covers her body from him, soon tearing the shirt over her head. His mouth stops attacking her clavicle then, green eyes focusing on her tits with a rising smirk.
“There’s my girls. Daddy’s home…”
Before she can even reply with a laugh at his comment, his mouth is swallowing her left tit, tongue roughly swirling over her nipple till it peaks against his wet muscle. She moans and arches off the mattress when his other hand massages, palms, and squeezes her other breast with the same fervent hunger.
Her hands find purchase on his strong upper arms, bicep flexing underneath her pads. His mouth devoutly licks lower and lower down her belly. She can feel his smirk rise against her skin the further he travels before his tongue dives straight into her folds.
“Fuck!” Her hips instantly buck forward, everything below her belly button clenching at the welcome intrusion.
And God, that man is skilled when it comes to sex. If he takes nothing else in his life seriously, this is his goddamn Olympics. He always gives it his all, just aiming for that gold medal over and over again.
It’s why she honestly forgives him for most of the shit he does or says, and she’s pretty sure he knows it, too.
His arms wrap around her thighs and pull her even closer against his sinful mouth. Her ankles cross behind his head, calves resting on those broad shoulders that seem to be made just for that purpose. Her toes tease his scalp, scratch the back of his head that cause little groans of his against her center that sound both submissive and primal, as if it's the most natural thing to give his everything to her.
His nose deliciously rubs her clit, and then the bastard fucking inhales and sucks the air right out of her when his lips seal around her bundle of nerves. She cries out his name, her cunt clenching with aching emptiness.
“Don’t worry. I know what you need,” Ben hums against her mound and shoves two thick fingers into her wet channel. “So fucking tight. You think you can take three? It’s been a while. Gotta get you into shape again…”
Fucking Olympics.
His digits then pump her so purposefully, mouth sucking her so religiously, she soon soars so fucking high she can see fucking Cupid himself. Her head falls back into the clouds when that fucking arrow hits, and she falls apart under his binding spell.
She thinks she might have passed out there for a second or two. When she steals a glance south, he still works her zealously through her glorious high as her pussy grips his fingers so tight she’s baffled they don’t break.
If she still had been a supe, they would’ve have.
And my God, she knows Ben’s never wasteful, not with his drugs nor with her arousal, but the way his tongue cleans her and licks his own fingers reaches a new level of obscenity she hasn’t witnessed before.
He acts like he’s been fucking parched for decades, and her juices are the elixir of life.
Then, when there's not a drop left to drink, and only then, does he decide to resurface with the laziest and proudest fucking smirk she’s ever seen. He leans so close to her face their foreheads touch, and she can smell her own scent in his glistening beard before he makes her taste herself, too.
“You’re still the same shithead.” She smirks breathlessly, her tits heaving as she breaks from the kiss. His chuckles fill her soul. She cards her fingers through his beard and brushes the hair back that falls into his mesmerizingly green eyes. “You’re gonna make love to me now?”
A smile widens on his plump and swollen lips, even at the hint of teasing in her voice, but he doesn’t respond with words, only nods and claims her lips in a blazing kiss. He angles his hips between her thighs then and spreads her legs further apart as they secure around his middle.
His lips leave hers and force her eyes open, staring straight into his. There’s an abundance of devotion and love in the lush greens that fill her heart. He makes her fucking feel it – every goddamn thing she is to him.
She feels his love when their fingers interlace and he pins them above her head. She feels his dedication with every thick, long inch he pushes inside of her. And she feels his fucking loyalty with each deliberate stroke.
He doesn’t rush, even keeps the dirty talk to a minimum. This is just for her.
It’s his fucking Olympics.
But most of all, she sees their vows shimmering in his eyes and knows he’ll never fucking break them.
“I love you,” she moans breathily into his ear, wounding herself tighter around him. She’s fucking close, ready for that next arrow with his name on it to pierce right through her heart.
He smirks a little in response, like he’s been waiting to hear it first. “Trust me. I fucking love you more,” he says, voice husky and thick with love. He emphasizes his promise with a snap of his hips, driving his cock right against her cervix. “Gonna pump a full fucking load deep into that little pussy till you’re fucking knocked up with a whole litter.”
Fucking shit. That should not turn her on as much as it does, but it’s hard to goddamn deny it when she comes right then and there as soon as he’s finished that filthy sentence.
“That’s it. Fucking milk my cock,” Ben rasps into her ear and feels his balls tighten when her pussy quakes around his shaft. “Like a fucking faucet,” he murmurs appreciatively and sucks marks into her neck. He’s missed making her his work of art, too.
When he spills his seed into her, hot and raw, he ensures their eye contact never breaks. He wants her to see what she’s fucking doing to him, how he falls apart just for her, too.
Tumblr media
Two months later…
“What the fuck is taking you so long?” Ben stretches his neck and tries to peer into the kitchen. He begrudgingly eyes the green, glittery party hat on the dining table in front of him. “‘M not putting the fucking hat on, by the way.”
“Dude, you think it’s fucking easy lighting 108 candles on a fucking cake?” she retorts from the kitchen with a bit of bite before she strolls out with a sort of wonky buttercream cake, but the smile on her face is even brighter than the million candles.
“There’s no fucking way you put 108 candles on there,” Ben scoffs and grumpily crosses his arms over his chest, leaning back with a creak in his chair.
He’s been a bit of a party pooper all day. It also didn’t help when their son pointed that out at breakfast.
However, Ben probably shouldn’t have replied with: “Yeah, you would be too if your wife said no to blow.”
And yup, you bet your ass he woke her up bright and early in the morning, requesting she’d lick the snow off his dick. He’d termed it a super blow job and was rather disappointed when she'd declined.
“No, but I managed to get 53 on there, so it’s an A for effort,” she replies patiently. God, she needs so much fucking patience every day, but especially today.
“What fucking hippie school did you go to, huh?” Ben huffs and only encounters an annoyed frown when he looks at her.
“Blow out your fucking candles and make your wish, caveman,” she orders him dryly.
With a pissy eye roll, he does, puffing the life out of each little flame. “Are we fucking done with this now?”
Just then, the oven timer goes off, and Y/N straightens in the seat across from him.
“Uh, almost,” she says. “Got something in the oven. Can you check?”
“It’s my fucking birthday. How about you check yourself?” he retorts like a fucking princess.
“Ben, c’mon, I just spent six hours in the kitchen, baking you that cake,” she argues.
“Surprising it took six hours for this fucking thing,” Ben mutters, and she’s about to goddamn choke him.
Patience is a virtue, patience is a virtue…
“Baby, please, my feet hurt really bad.” She pouts, and he finally gets up with a deep sigh. She smiles wickedly.
“The oven isn’t even fucking on!” Ben yells soon from the kitchen. “And there’s nothing fucking inside!”
“Are you sure?” she acts as best as she can. “I thought I put something on the baking sheet.”
She listens to the clattering metal before a beat of silence follows. She’s sure his brows are densely knit in confusion (and frustration) at this point.
“What the fuck is this? Why would you put a fucking plastic stick in there?” The question finishes when he returns to the dining room, a small, white stick still in hand. He then holds it to his nose. “Why the fuck does it smell like piss?”
“Because I fucking peed on it,” she responds but sees he’s still not fully catching on.
“Ew! Why the fuck would you put that in the fucking oven?!” His brow furrows so comically she tries her hardest to stifle her laughter.
God, she hopes the kid gets her brains.
“Why is there a fucking smiley on it?”
“Because you’re supposed to be fucking happy, you moron,” she says.
“Why would I be fucking happy over a piss stick? Not exactly the fucking Rolex I wanted, is it?”
“Ben.”
His green eyes narrow at her and then blink. “Wait…”
“Yup.”
“Are you–“
“Yup.”
The stick in his hand drops to the floor before he scoops her up into his arms so fast she feels slightly dizzy from the motion. Happily, her legs wrap around his waist and arms lock behind his neck. She kisses him deeply, and he kisses her back with the same passionate devotion.
He squeezes his eyes shut a little tighter, forcing the tears to stay in, but she can still see the remnants of them when she draws back from his lips.
“I’m pregnant,” she says in case he still needed the verbal confirmation.
“Best fucking birthday ever,” he replies, swallowing the fucking lump in his dry throat.
She grins mischievously. “Told you it would be a good one, but no super blow jobs for a while.”
He snorts a chuckle. “Got it. I’ll take the regular ones, too.”
Ben once used to hate everything, his heart, much like the Grinch’s, a few sizes too small for anything else. But now, there’s barely enough space in his chest to contain it all. These days, he certainly considers himself a lover of all things life has to fucking offer.
Tumblr media
The End 💕
Didn't I fucking say I would fix it?! Well, there ya go! Sid and Nancy got a happy end 🌅❣️
Do you guys think Ben wished for a baby or a fucking Rolex when he blew out those candles? 😂
(@zepskies 💜 – Not sure you remember this, but you sent me this ask for Dirty Drabbles about a year ago lol: What if Ben's girlfriend/wife/partner agrees to help fulfill one of his dirty fantasies. She's fully prepared for it to be insane (a la Ben), but what he requests is actually something surprisingly sweet (in its own way lol) And I immediately had this for this miniseries in mind! It fit those two perfectly!! 🥰🫶)
🩵 Tag List
☕️ Ko-Fi
💭 Talk Dirty to Me
Tumblr media
TAGS:
Forevers: @alwaystiredandconfused @lyarr24 @supernotnatural2005 @deans-spinster-witch @blackcherrywhiskey
@deansbbyx @foxyjwls007 @ladysparkles78 @roseblue373 @zepskies
@agalliasi @yvonneeeee @hobby27 @iamsapphine @globetrotter28
@mxltifxnd0m @lacilou @feyresqueen @suckitands33 @onlyangel-444
@syrma-sensei @perpetualabsurdity @deans-baby-momma @yoobusgoobus @jessjad
@hunter-or-the-hunted @k-slla @just-levyy @mrsjenniferwinchester @illicithallways
@muhahaha303 @ultimatecin73 @nancymcl @leigh70 @brightlilith
@nesnejwritings @samslvrgirl @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @fromcaintodean @barewithme02
@thebiggerbear @star-yawnznn @thej2report @misatxox @spnaquakindgdom
@americanvenom13 @lamentationsofalonelypotato
Soldier Boy: @deans-baby-momma @snowayumi
Rehab Series: @nancymcl @sparkydonugh
69 notes · View notes
daisywords · 7 months ago
Text
bet y'all didn't know that, like any cliche writeblr, I too have a vampire romance wip
46 notes · View notes
unproduciblesmackdown · 1 month ago
Text
Tumblr media
winston my quant of billions
#''😒''#corned beef#winston billions#& green of all things; drew it in purpley pink & being like whoa hey is this too much deliberately breaking out this Rare Coloring#minty fresh....been funny to be rotating the villainy of; let's say; bsol & xmas & then thinking about billions' whole other world there#& its completely different take where of all things winston is like. treated as a villain in a way its sicko My God central men aren't#(who are also quite different from iconis villains but yknow with the very fundamental differences in general what else is a surprise)#axe? prince? alive & well & billions does mean to be commenting on that like yeah sure#but winston? gotta be humiliated & violated & attacked / killed (if figuratively + just by assumption Oh He's Fiiine)#as well as basically truly dead to everyone but in a Never Existed / Spontaneously Shunned way. nobody thinks about him ever again#including when non wretched central men characters are getting these silver linings Benefits from their sabotaging a central man#not winston though maybe; the writing has forgotten him / sees no worth in bringing him up unless At His Expense; not gain#didn't get background randos telling prince or the like to go fuck himself at any point. open contempt reserved for winston there#better to have Objective Entitlement to power over / access to people & then; hey what the; be an asshole about it???#than to not just Have that entitlement & not expect it & not try to use it & be friendly & minding your own business as much or more than#any other characters like good lord what a Loser. the queerness & disability of this inferiority? just some jokes (at winston's expense)#& we will be killing him like nobody even considers for central men takedowns. those are polite & we all have Some regret it came to this#better to abuse people than. be so unepic (different from Normal white cishet 50some men who love certain media)#& on that note you're never gonna guess what's Good to do to the unepic people who bring it upon themselves....yeah haha. abuse#you're never gonna guess but power difference is a given & also good if an epic person has that power. & on that note#what can they do with it but keep unepic people in their place? what other hope do we have? winston may try to say a pun. or speak at all :#anyway while there's the absolute joys of Any Good Bastard over in a wildly different oeuvre it's like well yknow#while winston is already Ruining Things as more a Wretched Sicko Evil Asshole for seeing himself as a person & others as people#instead of himself as an inferior who has to apologize for existing & initiating any interaction vs only ever doing as he's told#unlike the best heroes who know they're superior & will use others & mess with their lives however they feel is justified; you're welcome#like well if winston's such an exceptional dick(tm) around here that he has to be introduced w/discussion / explanation around this#great let him be even bitchier & more ''difficult''....& billions would never & that's why [sorry to all the characters trapped in there]#the slightest glimpses of like & The Quasirival Weirdo Duos Are Kinda Being Cunts b/w usual parallels riawin & taylip#what comes of that? oh nothing. but as ever these are at least glimpses of a little more liveliness & range for making room for this a sec#anyway imagine getting so niche that your other kinda just as niche thing is like. less niche. but not really. wheee yayyy fr lol My Whimsy
12 notes · View notes
shima-draws · 1 year ago
Note
I haven't watched more than like, 8 episodes of once piece, but i just want to say that i'm loving your live(?) blogging of the episodes as you go. especially all the sanji x luffy, it's all very cute in general but also how excited you get about it is fantastic.
that's all! i just love seeing people passionately enjoy things.
AAGFGHGHF THANK YOU OMG........I feel like I've been REALLY annoying talking about Sanlu nonstop but I'm glad at least somebody is enjoying it lmao. But if there's one place where I SHOULD have no filter and feel free to talk about my ships constantly, it should be my own blog right. LOL
Essentially,
Tumblr media
68 notes · View notes
simplyghosting · 5 months ago
Text
I’ll be honest, for as many years at I’ve seen October art/writing challenges (and art challenges the rest of the weeks/months of the year), I’ve only attempted a few and never finished any.
That being said, I think what I’m going to do for my umpteenth attempt this new October is to just.. do. Just do something every day. Any challenge, any prompt, any event, even if it’s mixed and mismatched. Doesn’t matter if it’s finished, though I will try for it. A few well-typed sentences, a sketched drawing, an unfinished study, I’ll still label them a success. I want my goal for this month to be to make improvements in my art and passions and to make an effort. Not bogged down by perfectionism or despair or lack of motivation or whatever else may stop me. I want to make the challenge of this month for me to live my life thoughtfully and love and respect what I bring into it again.
14 notes · View notes
crossbackpoke-check · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Why I Am Not Coming In To Work Today [abridged], Jess Zimmerman
part one | part two
#me when everybody is posting the maple leafs sad narratives and i am furiously generating this like HOLD ONNNN HOLD ONNNNNNN#honestly i could've been SOOOO MEAN about this because i saw this poem & alexandra got the preview on the poetry blog#where i just reblogged the first half of this poem point blank with the tags#kyle dubas#toronto maple leafs#& got yelled at aksdaksf & it literally only didn't go on this blog bc i usually write more & then it was percolating & i looked up the poe#& it was only the FIRST PART i'd reblogged i didn't know there was more & then brain immediately went brrrrr ok time for an edit.#this is a long one lol & i also have no idea if it makes sense to anybody but me but because y'all know me i will always overexplain so!!#my reasoning for the reasons obvi kyle. that's a given i hope he's doing well i hope he & his family r good but man is not coming in to wor#the second edit took me a stupid amount of time bc i am nitpicky but also i learned how to do the layers & transparency from the claude edi#that actually y'all don't know about lmao but i lost my mind when i saw how perfectly those pictures align i was scrolling getty & was like#ok december i'm gonna do a headline one (in my brain with the november/june quote about choosing to die again) w/ maple leafs playoff odds#how they say at winter break you know who's gonna be in the playoffs & who'll win & they thought they had a shot but it's mitchie overlaid#the 2003-04 team who'd last won a playoff round with the atlantic division stats from dec for 22-23 & how long it's been & dec headlines#i wanted breakup/recent/never loved to be a recent trade acquisition somebody who bounced around & somebody else so i almost had simmer#brodie & zar but then i wanted to make murray for breakup at any time &i forgot zar & him were on the pens together &it hit me like a truc#bc there's a photo of the two of them EXACTLY the same so close it's scary of this one but them as pens so they had to be it & i did always#know never loved again was mitchie. sorry. also mitchie in the penalty box the last game but i couldn't find footage of it & this one works#no i could not find a photo of tyler bertuzzi fighting a leaf for a dog looked at me yes i tried.#i almost made the bunting photo jt but instead it's 'bunting a rat etc' anyway the one i really feel unhinged about is dead pets bc at firs#i was gonna make it the handshake line & look to see if the leafs had drafted anybody on the panthers (dead pet former draft pick)#& they had & it was carter verhaeghe & i couldn't get a good pic of matthews & verhaeghe but it's fine bc i thought about the mo/luke schen#narrative (in which they are a perfect d pair long lost) & schenn was drafted by the leafs & that line fits jut trust me. also how i feel#about the kniesy luminous line that one possessed me it had to be kniesy idk why. i almost put gussy as girls are too pretty though ALSO#did u like my joke. daylight SAVINGS time on the goalie. thank u. also my photo magic on the jt (me very poorly editing in him as an isle)#OK ALSO HOLD ONNNNN there is a part two but i have to wait for the Content i want it will come out as soon as [redacted] or sooner#if i get bad at waiting &everyone will pretend like it is always the way it will be once i have the photos i want. speaking of did the leaf#simply not take a team photo this year?? it Does Not Exist for me i have tried very hard to look for it also i'm excited for part 2#one of them is named oh you're so unhinged for this one & the finished product is you're unhinged in ways you didn't even know u were sorry#liv in the replies
199 notes · View notes
lemongogo · 2 months ago
Text
need 2 find myself again in 2025 . tbhwu
Tumblr media
#depression has hollowed me out in2 a shell of my former self#and i thmk i need 2 grit my teeth and just get over It whatever It is#recognizing its no easy task but also knowing i cant keep on like this#and allowing myself to spiral into misery thereby preventing any possible change or growth#sigh …. sogh .. i want 2 be a person again . picture friends circa 2008 outlining me in chalk. i want 2 know theres something there#how u ask (me asking myself)#idk but one way or anotjer . and not in that new yrs resolution fallacy way#anyways . anyways z . crazy how a week off from work will leave u feeling real again#i gotta get out of there . step 1😭🙏🙏#its especially hard when everyone arnd you is objectively doing better. partners finances purpose . >staring in2 the camera 1000 yd stare#u get thru the beast of being a teenager like thank god thats over and then b4 you even catch ur breath#your mid 20s are casting a shadow over u like some menacing thing and u have to gulp and say hes right behind me isnt he#i think people often like to give the advice that youll figure it out but it leaves me feeling so disquieted#bc its like sure im sure i will ive made it this far i can do what i need to get by when the moment matters#but it does nothing to assauge the immediate anxiety and feelings of worthlessness and lack of direction yk#goddmanit assuage i spelled it wrong everyone point and laugh#bc its like what if i dont and i mean that in a very like . existential & not material way . idk what im saying but i think thats the advice#i hate most . not sure if u have felt or do feel the same . -__- like yes oersonal experience sure whatever happens will happen and you will#simply adjust but will i ever feel like its something i want to experience/endure .#whatever anyways x2. im journalling i think that helps me the best rn . and its the one thing thats allowed me hope and i think#having that time to examine and mull over and deconstruct is rly helpful tbh. and i would like to think#over the long term i can repair my creativity and cultivate a new outlet that doesnt leave me feeling empty if i cant draw as i used to#yaar#i feel like i dont write for very long tho thats the one thing that kinda blows#two pages maybe and ive only addressed two maybe three points if im being generous lol i get so bored with the actual motion#when my mind moves 10x as fast . and idc for audio logs either ykwim.#ohh tumblr how i love u . tag system like no other
15 notes · View notes
yanderespamton78 · 10 months ago
Text
Pinup!!!!! the baby!!!! the guy!!!!
Tumblr media
sorry if this looks kinda iffy the majority of this was drawn between 11pm and 2:30am so i was very tired loll
also yes that is a totoro bag i dont care if totoro doesnt exist in cyber city he has a totoro bag come at me
Pinup belongs to @turntableart
#read all the tags before you reblog otherwise you will be confused#i feel like i got the body type wrong uaughhh#i feel like the proportions are inaccurate#im blaming it on the clothes i promise the sketch looked good then the clothes went and ruined it#i feel really bad admitting this but now that i think about it i literally never draw chubby characters#all my addisons are pretty long and gangly for the most part and then spamton is just very small in my style hes not really pudgy#and tbh i didnt really draw full bodies very often before addisons and spamton but my one (1) oc was also pretty long and lanky#probably because i myself am pretty long and lanky#ueuugough hauguh#i need to practice more#also i feel like the shoes look weird#im generally not too happy with it but its ok ig#i was terrified of making the features too exaggerated and being offensive and i think i went to much the other way and just made him skinn#ffs#ill draw him again i promise#and it will look better pinky promise#🤙🤙🤙 theres no proper pinky emoji#i love him tho hes cute#i really like his original design#uururuguggg#ugh debating whether i should even post this or if i should keep tinkering with it#im gonna tinker with it a bit more i will continue writing tags when im done#ok tinkering over im much happier with it now#i made him a bit shorter and that solved all my problems#i think i have a habit of drawing characters too tall ngl lmao#also not too happy with the rendering but its good enough#uh im only posting the tinkered version that im happy with so if you want the untinkered version then just ask lol#pixel art#art#turn off the lights arg
20 notes · View notes
elephantlovemedleys · 7 months ago
Text
.
13 notes · View notes
sskk-manifesto · 3 months ago
Text
--
#Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#Mmmmmhhh#I had to step away and do something very quick after watching the episode so now I'm afraid I forgot all of it lol#Okay thoughts:#I'm afraid I'll keep saying this every time. Do not. Give me. An amv opening. Don't do that. Postpone your airing date. I don't care#I feel like I wasn't as pissed with it when they did that for s3 but it's probably a case of the s3 opening at least looked somewhat–#better (??) + you can make a mistake once but don't think I will let it slip a second time#Other than that... To be fair this episode was animated fairly well. I think you can really notice a big quality drop after the–#Ranpo-realizing-who-Kamui-is sequence but overall it's more than okay.#The colours of the ship irk me a little but to be fair I never thought colours were b/sd anime strong point...#This episode was sooooooo political in so many ways I could literally talk about it for hours#(don't test me I'm not kidding. Talking about politics in anime for hours is something I've done in the past and will do in the future.)#(Then again I study/think/breathe politics pretty much 24/7 so is that really surprising... )#I need to write an essay on Fukuchi's speech alone. The public speech communication techniques [redacted Italian politics comment].#The way he's welcomed [redacted eu parliament comment]. Unfortunately I don't have time for it but breaking it down very quickly#1. Suggesting to unify defences worldwide is INSANE. No one would ever take it. Probably going to be cynical here but there's one (1) thing#states care about and it's the independence of their own sovereignty (that is: no one has the right to come and tell what must be done–#within one's borders). Eu has been trying to do exactly that (unify defences) for decades to no avail. Nato is on the brink of crumbling–#down. It's just... Such a distant perspective from how the world works right now? Idk.#Which brings me to 2. Even if it's deeply inconsistent with how world politics work the bsd un perspective is still very coherent with–#a latter thesis brought up in the manga that is “countriest tend to merge and come together” which is. Very anti-historical if you ask me–#but idk. Beautiful to imagine I suppose.#What else uhm... I liked the drawings this episode... Even Atsushi was back being pretty at some points... (Generally not really a fan of–#what the style in the later seasons came to be). Also 55 Minutes reference ‼‼‼#I like Fukuchi's character so much......... I love idealist characters... And the inherent loneliness... The longing... The yearning!!!!!!#I love him so. Oh and I LOVED Akutagawa. I thought his entrance wouldn't have impacted me after all this time (and after knowing–#what episode 3 will be lol). And yet it was such an emotional moment!!!! What do you mean Atsushi is scared to be alone and Akutagawa is–#coming for him!!!!!! I'm crying all my tears. And Akutagawa was so cool in the end!!! By heart was beating so fast!!!!!#It's the etheral blurred light...#The way he still manages to come off so cool despite being inherently pathetic is nothing short to miraculous
7 notes · View notes
bleachbleachbleach · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
[Bleach 083]
I have never really identified this in myself before, but I am kind of maybe a little obsessed with Ganju. A lot of this has to do with my general superinvestment in Rukia and Kaien and the whole Shiba-Kuchiki situation. But I'm also just into Ganju himself? I think it's the 4WD boar. SUBARU FAM.
Also because it's interesting to think about what we can draw from these panels, in terms of how Ganju is thinking about himself. I'm pretty sure we don't yet know that the Shiba are former nobility (though now I'm not sure in what future context that, specifically, would come up? if I had to guess Byakuya brings it up on the bridge, because literally who else would). Regardless, they have this whole cannon situation, and they are adept enough at the spiritual arts to know/invent kidou. In this chapter, the ceremony of the cannon is a huge deal (and requires use of what we might assume is Kuukaku's zanpakutou?). Even if we don't know the specifics, we know these are not your average Rukongai konpaku by any stretch of the imagination.
From Rukongai
But Ganju has still narrated a version of his brother that excelled in the Academy "despite being from Rukongai." The Shiba are absolutely not "from Rukongai" in the way that, say, Parakeet Kid is, even if they have always lived outside the Seireitei walls, pre- or post-demotion. Despite that distinction, and their linage, Ganju still thinks of himself--and by extension, Kaien--as being of this place, this non-Seireitei place. I mean, he rides a boar, he has fully embraced the bogan lifestyle.
My point is, this distinction of being from Rukongai matters to him, in his calculus of the world. Being from a noble family, it's probably only as surprising that Kaien is as innately talented as he is, as it is that Byakuya would be innately talented (relative to other Kuchiki as well as relative to other shinigami). The reach isn't as extreme as it would be for some literally random Rukongai konpaku. But that's not how Ganju sees this.
My brother who's in the Gotei
As far as determining Gotei norms, Ganju gives us a lot of cool info, provided we take him at this word as someone who would be intimately familiar with how the Gotei works. SURE, everything I've said thus far suggests we shouldn't. But I also feel like his pride in Kaien--and the kinds of weird things grief makes fixations out of--would suggest that even if Ganju knows nothing about the Gotei, he knows these little Kaien-shaped pieces to the letter:
Perhaps obviously, it is unusual to have lieutenant-class levels of reiryoku on entry into the Gotei
This does not automatically qualify you to become a lieutenant (even if there are slots available, which it kind of seemed like there were, re: Ukitake)
Kaien makes lieutenant within 5 years of joining the Gotei, which is also an exceptionally quick ascent. Given that Ukitake is nudging him in that direction during TBTP, this gives us something of a timeline on how long Kaien had been in the Gotei at that point (not very!).
"I was just a kid"
Then, between 40-110 years later, Kaien dies.
It's wild to think about Ganju being "a kid" when this happens. When was Ganju born???? Given that neither time nor aging are linear here, that's an impossible question to answer with certainty. Plus, I think "a kid" in this context could mean a whole lot of things that don't necessarily mean "I was exactly seven years old."
Even if I don't think I buy it entirely, I'm into the possibility that Ganju really is BABY, and was born after Kaien was already a shinigami and living apart from the fam (are the Shiba parents still alive and living and even weirder and more itinerant life than even Kuukaku--perhaps on the high seas??).
I'm also into the possibility that, honestly, Ganju has had a hard life, and that Kaien's death fundamentally separated his sense of who he was prior to that moment and who he would become, and that this is what he's referencing when he says his memories are dim because he was "only a kid" then. He had to grow up fast, at the same time as he's in no rush to grow up (running around with his boar gang, self-proclaiming things, rushing home for supper, acting the dutiful little bro to Kuukaku). Regardless, there's a lot of trauma surrounding Kaien's death, for sure. Which isn't to say Ganu's entire and only personality and reason for anything is his trauma, LOL. But it's not like Kaien's death and absence isn't a huge part of what's made him. It's not until this moment with the cannon, and the Hero Garb he made himself (using the Shiba crest) that he really says, okay, let's get some real info. Let's move forward.
DIY Regalia
Even the fact of his making his own Hero Garb really intrigues me. There is a long history that the Shiba are a part of--and again, we see this in the ceremony of the cannon, and perhaps even in Kuukaku's clothing and tattoos. It's not as though the Shiba don't already have regalia. And we could take this as Ganju finally fashioning literal, specific garments for himself as he takes up more of the mantel of his family's legacy, in the style of their usual regalia. I totally buy that.
But I also feel like the focus on this special getup being self-made goes back to Ganju not necessarily having access to the full picture of who his family was as a Great Noble House, and what all that history really is. We know that sometime after Kaien's death, the Shiba ceased to be a Great Noble House. If Ganju really was that young when Kaien died, there's another disruption. Like his memories of Kaien or his notions of who Kaien was, what the circumstances of his death were, Ganju is kind of piecing these things together without a map. ...Not unlike Ichigo!
(Must run in the family.)
34 notes · View notes
venom-ass-daily · 4 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
From Venom: The Last Dance (2024)
13 notes · View notes