#also if you were to tell me that is an actual line from the half-blood prince a.k.a
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pretentiouswreckingball · 8 months ago
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loopsie i saw your drarry hsm post and i raise you: harry singing bet on it from hsm2 after his friends try to discourage him from dating draco
kit omg.
"I'm not gonna stop, not gonna stop 'til I get my shot, that's who I am, that is my plan, will I end up on top? You can bet on it, bet on it---" <- yes YES YES U ARE SO RIGHT
he would be like, "alright bet" like i said in this post about the horrocrux hunting, he totally would do this just to spite him but in this case, to spite everyone else and prove his point which is: draco<3
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vinceaddams · 1 year ago
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Early 18th (and late 17th) century fashions are so under-utilized in vampire media and I think it's a damn shame.
I don't actually think I've ever seen a single image of a vampire character in an early 18th century suit. Hardly any movies set in that era either, and hardly any historical costumers who do it. (Even my beloved gay pirate show set in 1717 takes nearly all of its 18th century looks from the second half of the century. Not enough appreciation for baroque fashion!!)
Yes I love late 18th century fashion as much as anyone, and 19th century formal suits are all very well and good, but if you want something that says old, dead, wealthy, and slightly dishevelled, then the 1690's-1730's are where it's at.
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(Retrato del Virrey Alencastre Noroña y Silva, Duque de Linares, ca. 1711-1723.)
There was so much dark velvet, and so many little metallic buttons & buttonholes. Blood red linings were VERY fashionable in this era, no matter what the colour of the rest of the suit was.
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(Johann Christoph Freiherr von Bartenstein by Martin van Meytens the Younger, 1730's.)
The slits on the front of the shirts are super low, they button only at the collar, and it's fashionable to leave most of the waistcoat unbuttoned so the shirt sticks out, as seen in the above portraits.
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(Portrait of Anne Louis Goislard de Montsabert, Comte de Richbourg-le-Toureil, 1734.)
Waistcoats are very long, coats are very full, and the cuffs are huge. But the sleeves are on the shorter side to show off more of that shirt, and the ruffles if it has them! Creepy undead hands with long nails would sit so nicely under those ruffles.
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(1720's-30's, LACMA)
Embroidery designs are huge and chunky and often full of metallic threads, and the brocade designs even bigger.
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(1730's, V&A, metal and silk embroidery on silk satin.)
Sometimes they did this fun thing where the coat would have contrasting cuffs made from the same fabric as the waistcoat.
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(Niklaus Sigmund Steiger by Johann Rudolf Huber, 1724.)
Tell me this look isn't positively made for vampires!
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(Portrait of Jean-Baptiste de Roll-Montpellier, 1713.)
(Yeah I am cherry-picking mostly red and black examples for this post, and there are plenty of non-vampire-y looking images from this time, but you get the idea!)
And the wrappers (at-home robes) were also cut very large, and, if you could afford it, made with incredible brocades.
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(Portrait of a nobleman by Giovanni Maria delle Piane, no date given but I'd guess maybe 1680's or 90's.)
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(Circle of Giovanni Maria delle Piane, no date given but I'd guess very late 17th or very early 18th century.)
Now that looks like a child who's been stuck at the same age for a hundred years if I ever saw one!
I don't know as much about the women's fashion from this era, but they had many equally large and elabourate things.
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(1730's, Museo del Traje.)
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(Don't believe The Met's shitty dating, this is a robe volante from probably the 1720's.)
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(Mantua, c. 1708, The Met. No idea why they had to be that specific when they get other things wrong by entire decades but ok.)
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(Portrait of Duchess Colavit Piccolomini, 1690's.)
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(Maria van Buttinga-van Berghuys by Hermannus Collenius, 1717.)
Sometimes they also had these cute little devil horn hair curls that came down on either side of the forehead.
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(Viago in drag Portrait of a lady, Italian School, c. 1690.)
Enough suave Victorian vampires, I want to see Baroque ones! With huge wigs and brocade coat cuffs so big they go past the elbow!
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iwannascreameurekaa · 3 months ago
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So you're telling me that Leo returned to what was basically his home after dying, after killing and sacrificing himself t save his friends, family, and everything he loved, after literally exploding which probably wasn't very painless, he got back to camp halfblood after all of that only for his siblings and friends and those loved ones he died for to line up and punch him?
no crying? No hugs? Nothing from the hoard of people that cared about him and might've missed him and thought that he had actually died?
and it wasn't even playful punches either because it states, multiple times in the book, that Leo was hurt and that the punches were painful?
okay Rick I understand what you were trying to do but seriously?
And the only person to do the whole "crying and hugging" thing, which is probably a lot more realistic than freaking punching him, when reunited with Leo was piper and that was basically only because she was already sobbing because Jason was dead
Sometimes the canon makes me wonder if these characters really did actually care about Leo cause it's hard to tell and now I feel even worse
justice for Leo yall this is just mean
Edit: after this being up for a while and having different peoples opinions and memories throw at it, i would like to say that Percy and Will are the only ones to NOT punch Leo on his return to camp half blood and Harley did in fact end up sobbing but he also punched Leo. Twice. Really really hard. So
one commenter said how they believed that this is a common occurrence of ricks writing being unable to shown negative emotion in a correct way idk how to word this and honestly yeah I'm starting to notice that too (not hating on Rick) sometimes I love these parts of the books where it just doesn't make sense cause that means that I and many other authors have full rein to rewrite it as we please and we're gonna do that anyways even if the canon made sense in the first place
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screamforyani · 1 year ago
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cariño
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warnings ↠ dubcon-ish?, enemies with benefits, handjob, edging, implied intercouse towards the end
a/n ↠ i know this is very out of the blue but i watched atsv and i cant get miguel out of my head
wc. 1.1k
“untie me,” hissed miguel, fangs jutting as his blood-thirsty eyes followed you. 
you let out a hollow laugh the second those words escaped his mouth and met his penetrating stare. to say you and and miguel were enemies would be an understatement. there was something about this guy that irked you in the worst way, but could also turn you on like no other.
the feeling was mutual. you’d never admit a word of this if it wasn’t - not even to yourself. you and miguel had a weird thing going on, the sort of thing where the line between hate and lust grew thinner with each dark, loathing stare he shot you. 
maybe you’d had his cock in you a couple of times. twelve, to be exact, though not that you were counting (because you totally weren’t). not your proudest moments, but the sight of him on his knees, tangled in a weaving of webs made you forget it. his muscles bulged with every endeavor to free himself from your little trick. which was hilarious, because if they were any tighter, they’d burst right through his spandex. 
not that you were complaining. 
“hm, let me think about it,” you hummed, pretending to be deep in thought. “no.”
“i said - untie me. now,” miguel roared, as if it would make any difference. 
you crouched before him, pouting. “what’s the matter, spider-man? can’t handle other people telling you no? you don’t get to be the boss of everyone, cariño.”
you waved your finger in his face, to which miguel responded to with a lean forward as if he were going to bite your wrist off, but you were too quick. 
“woah there, bitey,” you taunted. “get it? that rhymes with spidey. hilarious, don’t you think?”
miguel spat, “you annoy me.”
“it’s a pleasure,” you said, merely grinning. then, you pointed to the extended talon behind his back where his hands were tied, asking, “can i borrow that? thanks.”
you used his talons to poke a hole in the lower half of his suit, promptly tearing at the spandex until the hole expanded. miguel wasn’t exactly pleased, not yet anyways, barking, “what the hell do you think you’re doing?”
“more than you deserve,” you whispered, widening the gap until his half-hard cock was freed. that you inevitably already saw. for obvious reasons, it was difficult for spider-men to conceal their hard-ons. “you guys freeball under these suits? that’s crazy. i mean, not that you’re gonna catch a hard-on fighting the spot, but you never know. i mean, what if some really sexy villain just hits… the spot. get it? the-”
“the spot. yes, i get the joke. shut the hell up,” miguel grumbled, irritated.
you giggled. his annoyed face was too hot. of course, you were riling him up on purpose.
licking a line down your palm, you gently grabbed his cock, stroking him in your hands while looking him in his angry eyes. you saw his features tense, the part that didn’t want to be angry surfacing. the part that wanted to be relieved.
that was all that was wrong with this cranky guy. he just needed some relief in his life, and who better to provide it to him than you, the spider-person he never wanted on this team in the first place but took in because jess had insisted you could be useful. and you were, in more ways than one. not that miguel would ever admit that, though.
“fuck,” miguel grunted, writhing again, though not in an attempt to escape. you knew how to pleasure him and that was your saving grace, but you also knew how to tease. “could you be any slower with that?”
“i could, actually. watch this,” you retorted, now pumping him in no particular hurry. you had time to waste.
your leisure movements were killing miguel slowly. literally. he groaned, “well, could you go any faster?”
“i could,” you repeated with a lilt. “but you’d have to say the magic word.”
“go faster!”
you gave him a mocking frown. “i don’t think that’s it, o’hara.”
“do i have to?”
“do you want to cum?”
miguel winced his eyes closed, heaved a huge sigh, and huffed, “please, go faster.”
“wow, you hit the lottery,” you said, quickening your pace. you loved watching his brows furrow with pleasure, sweat beading at his face.
miguel bit his lip, wanting to be mad at how you satisfied him. it reminded you of when he was buried balls deep inside of you, his weight resting on top of your chest while his teeth clamped into your shoulder, not for the purpose of extracting blood but to smother the sounds of pleasure that escaped him when your cunt was squeezing his dick. almost like he would rather die than let you know you were good for something.
it didn’t matter, though. the telltale signs of arousal manifested themselves in plentiful ways from his body, like the taut ache in his pants when you turned him on a little too much. he got so hard for you, it was ridiculous.
and you were having a ball (you were tempted to make a joke, but resisted for his mental sake). there was something about having an insanely large, strong man who could potentially crush you to smithereens squirming at your mercy. it made warmth spread through your chest and the slyest grin curl onto your lips.
miguel’s hips were thrusting into your palm, an obvious sign that he was on the brink of climax. you’d come to know it by now - he started to lost control, the reins slipping out his hands. and you loved it. you loved how he was a slave to his urges and not the other way around.
“you almost there?” you asked, in spite of being fully aware. 
miguel offered you no words, but the look on his face and his unstill, restless body said enough.
that was when you got the bold idea to withdraw your hand at the very last second, depriving him of what could have been. his wrath was instant. you saw his hips flail in a desperation you’d never seen of him before, his fluttering eyes snapping open to cut at you.
“oopsies,” you sang, smiling innocently.
that was the very last straw for miguel and he broke out of your restraints, having enough of playing weak. you gasped, caught off-guard when he switched on a dime, throwing you against the ground and hovering over you. you parted your lips to speak, but he was quick to shoot a web over your mouth. 
“you talk too much,” miguel growled, cutting your own spandex with his talons, and was pleased to find you were very wet. he fixed himself between your thighs, leaning into your ear to whisper, “and for the record, nobody decides if i cum, cariño.”
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star-girl69 · 10 months ago
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Cowboy Like Me
Clarisse La Rue x Fem!Reader
—-
Part One - The Last Time
Part Two - Cowboy Like Me
Part Three - Tomorrow Never Came (coming soon!)
Part Four - Living Legend (coming soon!)
Part Five - Pretty When You Cry (coming soon!)
—-
synopsis: 15 years later, you’re still climbing into clarisse’s arms and knowing she’s gonna leave.
a/n: personally i love life but idk about y’all and creds to @nvirskies for helping me w bits of this 🫶
Cowboy Like Me - Taylor Swift
warnings: y’all already know what’s happening
—-
“And I… I’m scared.”
You hum, adjusting yourself in your seat so your heart doesn’t break.
“It’s okay to be scared. I’m scared all the time.”
Jane is one of the sweetest kids you’ve ever met since becoming the Camp Half-Blood therapist thing. After your traumatizing years, watching Clarisse come and go, years spent in her bed- you found yourself wanting to tell someone.
You wanted to scream. You wanted to cry. You wanted to feel safe, especially when she was gone.
You wanted to tell someone that you hated Clarisse La Rue’s guts and also you loved her so much you weren’t sure if you could ever get over her.
So, you became that person.
“You’re allowed to be scared, though,” Jane continues. “I can’t. I’m a daughter of Ares, Y/N. If he sniffs out weakness then he’ll never love me.”
Your conversations with Jane have by far been the hardest sessions you’ve ever had. They remind you so much of what you went through 15 years ago. Of what you watched her go through.
“And you’re human, Jane. To fear is to be human. You’ll always be part human, the same way you are part god. That’s what being a demigod is,” you smile.
“It’s just… human?” she says, nose scrunching.
“All of the emotions you feel, the ones you hate, the ones that distract you- those are the ones that come from your mortal parent. Ares cannot take those away, no matter how hard he tries.”
You let the kids spread around the rumors that this room is magical and soundproof. In reality, the Gods just don’t care enough to listen.
—-
It took a long time to get Chiron and Mr. D to see the benefits of having an actual licensed therapist at Camp. They were hesitant, but you insisted, so they gave you a one month trial. It took even longer to get someone to actually come talk to you, but after Jane blew up on one of her siblings and hurt them, she came to you.
She came to you crying, saying she hated being like this, she hated being so explosive. And it was slow, but you helped her, and now she has coping mechanisms and now the entirety of the Ares cabin and a good portion of the camp scrambles for appointments with you.
Jane always comes at 6:30 on Fridays. She eats her dinner quick and runs across camp to your office at the Big House. Sometimes she cries, sometimes she squeezes a stress ball so hard she might actually crush it, but she always talks. She always opens herself up, she learns and she grows.
After that hour, you turn around and lay in your bed, and you think about Clarisse.
You think about when she comes back, you’re not so cold anymore but your heart is frozen over. You cry, she asks you not to cry, not when she’s here. She did the impossible, she survived.
But you see it in her eyes. The thrill. She will do it again and again for him and you will be left there.
And as much as your aching heart tells you to forget about her- she’s yours. You’re hers.
She calls you baby and pretty girl even though years of stress has caused crows lines around your eyes. You are still trapped with her, like some sort of wretched mirror- except you’re gazing into another world where you’re both still young. Where you’re both still happy. Where she didn’t leave.
You think about that alternate reality a lot.
You think about it tonight.
You come to your room and you lay on your cold bed, wrap an arm around your waist and imagine the pillow under your head is her chest. It’s embarrassing. It’s embarrassing to love her so much that you pretend she’s still here. It’s embarrassing that you pretend you have all the answers- the campers look up at you like you do have all the answers, but you really don’t. You know absolutely nothing. But you’re good at pretending.
The first time she visited camp she came to your room, cockily leaned against the door, and said something about how she had to meet the woman all of her younger siblings were gushing about. That night ended with her crying softly against your chest while you ran your hands through her hair.
And before, you went to colleges only an hour away from each other. When you were stressing about exams, when you got a bad grade, when the nights were cold and you missed her- you drove an hour and knocked on her door, and she let you in, into her bed, into her arms. She didn’t have let you into her heart, because you were always there.
When her roommate left for a few days for a family emergency, she asked her friends to take notes for her and drove to you. She stammered when you opened the door, tried to explain that she just couldn’t be alone, not anymore, not without you- and so she spent the next few days waiting in your room while you were at classes. You would sit in her lap while you did your homework, or she would just stand behind you at your desk and play with your hair. And you would spend your nights in her arms.
The second time she visited camp she didn’t say anything when she knocked on your door, and you just let her in. You spent the night laughing and reminiscing until you cried and she smiled sadly and asked you not to, and you tried for her, but you couldn’t. How can she expect you not to cry when she’s the one making you cry? When she’s cried herself over what happened between you?
The third, fourth, fifth, all the times she came to camp she would come to your door and sometimes you would cry, sometimes she would cry- sometimes you both would cry. Because how cruel is it to be held by the woman you love and know it’s not the girl you love? How cruel is it to know change?
—-
It’s not that you choose to love Clarisse. If you could choose, you wouldn’t love her. You would forget all about her. You dream about falling and hitting your head, waking up with a blank slate that’s untainted by her.
You don’t choose to love Clarisse.
Your skin doesn’t love her, not anymore- your cells replace every few weeks. And it’s been 2 months since she last came to camp. It’s your bones that love her. It’s something fundamental inside of you. Loving her is like moving- it takes so many little nerves and neurons to make it work- but it feels like nothing to you. Your bones love Clarisse.
And your bones surround your heart, and they trick you into loving her.
Every time she comes back you’re shocked by the way she isn’t her younger self. She’s older, there’s lines on her face, and she cut her hair a few inches shorter a few years ago. She carries herself different, partly because she’s grown and she’s learned to appreciate life a little more- she walks softer. And almost because you know she hurt her hip years ago, and you’ve spent nights kissing it and saying that she’ll be fine if she just gives it a little longer to heal.
You like to think that the reason she’s still able to go on quests and do everything she does is because of your healing touch.
But you see it sometimes, the way she walks softer, especially now after a long day. Its not that it hurts her, she’s just scared of putting a bit too much pressure on it so it does hurt her.
You watch her from the window. Smaller kids run past her, she’s listening absentmindedly to Abby James, the current counselor of the Ares cabin.
You giggle as she puts her hand on Abby’s shoulder and firmly says goodbye, pushing her off into the other direction- Abby is probably the most social Ares kid you’ve ever met. She’s a chatterbox, not in a bad or mean way, just a fact. Her long black hair swishes behind her as she turns, crossing her arms, and you’re sure you’ll be hearing about it in your next session.
You move back to the small couch- right by the door of your room. You sit there like you’re not expecting her, and you wait until you hear her footsteps up the stares to fix your hair and breathe in and out slowly.
She knocks.
“Come in,” you say, throwing your feet onto the coffee table and picking up a book about the history of psychology.
“Y/N,” she says. The door shuts behind her, she leans back against it.
“Hi, Clarisse,” you say, reduced to a child now that she’s in your presence. Now that you can look at her and see that she’s not her. “How are you?”
She snorts, walking past you and sitting in the armchair you sit in for your sessions.
“I don’t wanna play that shit tonight.”
“Hospitality?”
“Whatever you wanna call it,” she smiles, her feet touching yours on the coffee table. You feel a little breathless. You close the book, you weren’t even reading it, throwing it onto the coffee table.
She stares into your eyes.
“How have you been?”
You roll your eyes, but that just makes the tears more prominent.
“How is that any different?”
“‘Cause it’s you. ‘Cause I like hearing your voice.”
She leans back in the chair and gestures to you, so you cross your legs and sit up. You bite back the tears like a hyena with a fake laugh.
“Uh, I don’t know. The usual. All of my sessions are going good, not that I can really tell you. Why don’t I turn on some music?”
“Sure,” she says, leaning her face into her hands.
You walk past her and towards the bookshelf on the opposite wall, body screaming at the way your bare legs brush against her clothed knee.
It’s an old record player, somehow making the cut as not electronic enough to attract anything bad.
You don’t bother checking what you were last listening to. You just put the needle at the start of a song and hear the organs, the grand piano.
“I like this guy,” Clarisse says.
“Jeff Buckley,” you chuckle, smoothing down your camp t-shirt, adjusting your pajama shorts.
Looking out the door I see the rain // Fall upon the funeral mourners
You stand there for a moment longer, pretending to adjust your bookshelf, because you know you’ll start crying when you turn around and look at her.
So I’ll wait for you, love // And I’ll burn // Will I ever see your sweet return? // Oh, will I ever learn?
“Come back,” she says. She was just watching you avoid her. You could feel her eyes on you. You stiffen. “Please,” she adds, softly.
“It’s embarrassing,” you mutter, wiping the tears away.
“I’m just as embarrassing then, seeing how many times I’ve cried in this room. We cancel each other out.” You don’t turn, you can’t do it, you can’t let her see how much this effects you. “I don’t like it when you cry. Please, Y/N, come back.”
You take a deep breath and turn around, wanting to walk past her again, curious to see if she’ll reach out and pull you into the chair with her.
But she doesn’t get the chance too, because your eyes are blinded by tears, and the place where the rug curls up is always making you stumble. Except on days when she’s here, you’re so drained of everything, so you trip completely.
Your knees slam against the hardwood floor, Clarisse tries her best to catch you, but she was a foot too far to reach you- even with her fast reflexes.
And now you’re on your knees in front of her, crying even louder with burning knees.
“Y/N,” she breathes, and you drag yourself towards her, sobbing like a baby until you’re at her feet, resting your head in her lap. “Hey, it’s okay, it’s fine. I trip all the time.” You both know you’re not crying about that.
You press your face into the space between her leg and the cushion to muffle your loud cries.
You grab her legs, feral, nails digging through her cargo pants- but you don’t even reach skin.
“I love you so much, Clarisse,” you sob. “I love you. Don’t leave me tonight. Don’t leave me.”
She breathes out, it’s silent and you bite your tongue.
“I’ll stay tonight,” she says. “I was always gonna stay tonight, you don’t have to ask, baby.”
“Say you love me,” you whisper. “Say it, please.”
“I love you,” she says, her lips in your hair. “Of course I love you. I’ve always loved you.”
There is a certain desperation with demigod relationships. And you feel it now, you feel the desperate hands and the yearning hearts as you cry at her feet. And you feel your knees burn as you kneel before her. You listen to Jeff Buckley croon about love gone while you cry at her feet.
You can’t be embarrassed in this moment. Part of you feels like this is all just Clarisse’s problem, for being so beautiful you still love her, for leaving you and never putting you first. She has to hold you and fix you, she has to deal with the wet pant leg full of your tears. But really, you just want her to hold you. You just want to pretend she never left in the first place.
It’s never over // She is the tear that hangs inside my soul forever
—-
“Are you hungry?” you ask when you finally let go of her, pushing her away as you wipe your wet face.
She studies you for a moment.
“Yeah,” she says, honestly. “What’cha got?”
You reach under the coffee table for the box of snacks you always keep incase someone gets hungry during a session. You’ve both moved to the couch for more space, Jeff Buckley is still going in the background- you’ll have to get up and flip it over soon, or put on something else.
She rifles through the bags of mortal snacks until she finds a bag of salt and vinegar chips.
“Thanks, baby,” she mutters, tearing into the bag. You lean against the couch and just watch her. It could be like this all the time. If she would just stay.
She tries to feed you one, but for some reason that feels too intimate and you shake your head. She shrugs and eats it, even though it was pressed up against your lips a second ago.
That’s the one thing you don’t do. You kiss each other everywhere, except for the lips. You touch her everywhere, except for her lips.
You cry in her arms and she kisses your head, she runs her hands down your body but doesn’t kiss you.
And you’re scared of it. You’re scared of kissing her. You still feel like you can leave, even after all the nights together, if you just don’t kiss her.
She gestures to the curtain that separates your bedroom from where you see campers. “I like the new curtain. Flowers,” she says.
You rake your eyes over the carefully crocheted patterns, pink and blue and yellow, purple and green and red, all turned into pretty flowers.
“A few kids from the Demeter cabin made it for me,” you smile, thinking of how proud they had been to give it to you. “It’s so beautiful.”
“It is,” Clarisse says, but she’s not looking at the curtain anymore. “Jane was talking about you all day,” she says after a moment. “She really loves you.”
“I love her. If she hadn’t come to me, then no one else would have, and I probably would have gotten thrown out. I don’t even know where I would have gone.”
“You could’ve come to me. You can always come to me.”
You have her address pinned to a bulletin board next to your bed.
“Yeah,” you mumble, playing with a loose thread on the back of the couch. “She reminds me a lot of you, you know.”
“Really?” she chuckles. “How?”
“I can’t tell you, silly. Doctor-patient confidentiality.”
“Well, you said she’s like me. So just tell me what I’m like.”
“Okay,” you mumble, thinking over every moment you’ve spent with Clarisse, every session with Jane. “Well, you have very big emotions. It’s hard for you to control them. But, you never really feel them. You never get to the root of the problem. So, when something actually happens, all you know how to do is recognize that you’re angry. You can’t figure out why.”
“You’re good at this shit,” she mumbles. You laugh.
“Hm, you forget that being a demigod means you’re half human, too. And you’re very loyal. You’re loyal to the wrong people, sometimes.”
She crunches up the empty bag of chips and drops it onto the coffee table.
“Don’t do that,” she says.
“Do what?”
She rubs her socks against your knees. “I jus’ wanna be here with you, right now. Don’t say anything else.”
“You asked me about Jane.” You scoff and she glares at you, but her feet are still touching you, and you sigh. “I’m sorry. I jus’ wanna be here with you, too.”
She stares at you for a long moment, unblinking. When she finally looks away, she’s rubbing tears out of her eyes. You move to sit on your knees, leaning towards her.
“Clar, don’t cry,” you say. “What happened?”
You take her face in your hands, so she can’t wipe away the tears. Staring into your eyes, she’s forced to let them fall. She puts her hands on your waist.
“Sometimes I jus’ think about how you’ll never forgive me.”
You don’t know what to say to that.
“Let’s not talk about that right now, Clar. C’mon.”
“Is this room soundproof?” she asks, suddenly. You frown at first, not knowing what that has to do with anything- but then you remember.
You let the kids assume it’s soundproof in your early sessions. But eventually, when they ask, you tell them the truth. You tell them it’s not.
And when they get scared and ask if their godly parents will hear them- you put your hand on their arm and say no. No, they won’t hear you. It’s not that they can’t, it’s that they won’t. They won’t care.
“No. It’s not.”
She shakes her head and laughs.
“So, what? You just sit here and tell these kids that their parents don’t love them?”
“Because they don’t. A God’s love is not a human’s love, Clarisse, why-why dont you get it? It’s different. It’s just different. It’s not necessarily bad, it’s just not what these kids need.”
“You make them think that their parents don’t care about them.”
“Because they don’t! Fuck. They don’t, okay!”
She stares at you for a long time after your outburst.
“What is wrong with you?” she mutters, not necessarily mean but more genuinely curious. She truly believes your wrong in your hatred of the Gods.
“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with me? I spend my entire day helping kids. I spent my entire day handing them tissues, hugging them, teaching them coping skills. I have devoted my entire life to making sure no one ever felt how I felt. How am I the bad guy for helping them place the blame on who it really should be placed?”
“How you felt?”
You shuffle, sitting up taller.
“Yes, how I felt. How I feel. You don’t know what it was like for me, Clarisse. You don’t know what it was like to sleep without you and know that you were probably gone-”
“What the hell do you think I did every night of that quest?”
“But I didn’t leave you, Clarisse! I didn’t leave you. I have been waiting for you for years. You are the one who leaves me over and over again. And you- you have someone. I have no one, except for you. No one.”
Clarisse has a father. She has someone to blame, if she chose. She has someone to pray to, to cry to, to guide her.
What do you have? The unclaimed daughter of no one? The only person you belong to is Clarisse. And here she is, staring at you like you disgust her.
The anger falls away, because at your core you’re still a lonely 16 year old who needs her to come back, who needs to be claimed, who needs to be loved.
You’re a licensed psychologist. You know that you have deep, deep abandonment issues. You know that Clarisse is at the root of them. But the part of you that’s just a girl, your bones that will always love her, she’s everything to you. She’s all you have.
“Please don’t make us fight,” you cry, hands pressed to your cheeks. “You’re making me cry, Clarisse. Don’t make me cry.”
You watch her change entirely. It goes from the woman who can’t understand you to the girl who knows only you.
“I hate it when you cry,” she says, softly, a gateway back into her arms.
You throw yourself against her, trying your best not to cry for her, but you fail. Her lips are in your hair, your head against her chest. She smooths down your hair and begs you not to cry. Because for some reason, this feels like too much. For some reason, this hurts her the most.
Clarisse is self destructive just like you.
She helps you to your bed. She touches the flower curtain as you walk past.
Clarisse knows she’s hurting you and she knows you’re hurting her. You know you’re hurting her and you know she’s hurting you.
She takes off her uncomfortable clothes and slips under the blanket with you.
Clarisse loves you the same way you love her. Not by choice, but by nostalgia, by hope. She loves you because of what might be. You love her the same way. You both hope that one day it’ll all work out.
She tucks the blanket around you and cups your face. She tells you she’s sorry and whispers “I love you” one more time. You put your hand on her hip, the other pressing against your chest. You say you love her too. You say you love her so much you’re reduced to this less-than thing in her presence.
Clarisse doesn’t understand you. You don’t understand her. She’s nobody’s son, and you’re nobody’s daughter. You try to go about your day without her but you think about her on you so much.
It’s hard to do well on these nights when you know she’s gonna leave you. So you cry, you pretend, you relish this one night in her arms.
“I promise I don’t mean to hurt you,” she whispers. “I don’t. I love you so much. I want you to be happy, but I can’t let you go.” She traces her nose along your jawline. “I can’t let you be happy away from me.”
And it sounds so horrible and cruel, but the way she hurts you is so beautiful you can’t be bothered. She only hurts you because of love. Because she loves you, because she loves her father.
“I know,” you breathe. “I know everything. I don’t mean to hurt you either, I know exactly how you feel.”
A single tear falls down her face. “I can’t help but hurt you. I can’t help but let you hurt me.”
“I know, Clarisse,” you mutter. You press your lips to her cheek and swallow the salty tear falling down her face. “It feels so good, I know.”
Clarisse is a sadist like you. Clarisse is a masochist like you.
Clarisse is addicted to the pain just like you.
—-
me when i’m in an toxic and cosmically doomed relationship contest and my opponents are clarisse and y/n: 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱
let me know if you cried in the comments below! 😘
—-
taglist:
@lvrue @t-wylia @laughingcheese037 @kroumi @urdeadpoet @colezb @rey26 @harmzilla @elliewilliamsbae @amberfreemansburntface @kyuupidwrites @neverwaakeme-up @shark1008 @liballer @heyimadison @nvirskies @pnsteblnme @mar2ss @restellsss @ravisinghs-wife @marsconer @evangelinexo @randomhoex @luvrrish
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badkitty3000 · 4 months ago
Note
Can you write Five (adult body) getting with a gorgeous woman for the first time and going on a bit of a power trip and just extreme edging and playing with her and kinda humiliating (actions not words)
Sorry this took a bit longer to write...I got a little carried away with this one and it ended up being longer than anticipated. But I loved this idea and I got very excited about it!
I decided to write this from Five's POV. I still consider this a reader-insert because the MC is not named. But there is no use of "you" in it, only "she" and "her".
Thank you so much for this request. It was really fun to write! 😽
Tamed
Five x Reader One-shot, 8143 words
Warnings: Smut, Edging, Physical age difference (older woman, younger man), everyone is an adult
I sigh heavily as I survey the shelf of cereal in front of me. I mull over my choices, humming quietly along with the Neil Diamond song playing on the grocery store speakers overhead. Wheaties, Grape Nuts, Cheerios. I wonder what the fiber to protein ratio is on these? God, I’m bored. Is this really my life, now? It’s true that I wanted a peaceful life without the threat of the world ending or the people I know getting obliterated and dying. And it was nice for a while, don’t get me wrong. I liked not having to worry about my family, now that they were all safe. And I didn’t need to act as a cold-blooded serial killer anymore. I could just be the normal man I had always wanted to be. But I’m beginning to think that normal equals boring.
I have my powers back, so at least there’s that. As much as I wanted a simple life for myself, that doesn’t mean I wanted to be just like everyone else in every way. Those years of having no powers were a downright nightmare, so thank Christ that didn’t last. So, yes, I can blink and time travel and kick the living shit out of almost anyone, but it’s still all so…ordinary. Most days I just wander around the city, enjoying the peace and quiet, but also wondering what to do next. There has to be something else, right?
I am still in the body of a much younger person, despite being mentally in my 60s. Physically, I’m around 20, and while I’m definitely not complaining, it has left a lot of years ahead of me. It has also complicated the dating scene. In the beginning, I had to wait it out a few years, and let me tell you, it’s rough being a horny old man in a 13 year old body. And a horny 13 year-old with the mind of an old man. But I did end up getting plenty of handjobs, so there’s that. Unfortunately, they were all self-executed.
But now…now, I am starting to reap more benefits of this strong and youthful body I found myself dumped back into all those years ago. Women notice me. Men notice me. And the attention is not half bad. It still leads to another dilemma, however.
Let’s say I would like to indulge in some adult activities with a woman. I have no problem finding someone to fill that role. That makes me sound like an asshole, but it’s true. On my way into the store today, I noticed a young woman looking me over like I was a piece of meat. I’m fairly certain that if I had wanted to, I could have strolled on over, struck up a conversation, and had her back at my place in an hour. I know this, because I’ve done it before. But afterwards, I feel like a real creep. They don't know my real age, obviously, and unless they have some unresolved daddy issues, I’m guessing they would be none too happy to find out. Not to mention there’s usually not a whole lot for the two of us to discuss. So, I ignored this most recent prospect and am now standing in front of a line of breakfast foods before heading on over to the soup aisle. 
I sigh heavily again.
“If you get the bigger box, it’s actually more economical, you know.”
I glance up, Fiber One cereal in hand, to find a woman standing next to me, the amusement on her face giving the impression that she’s up to something crafty. My mouth opens partly, but no sound comes out. She is maybe the most stunning woman I’ve ever seen in my life. I’m talking supermodel-gorgeous. With her dark auburn hair and dramatic curves, I can’t stop staring like there’s something wrong with me. And here’s the real kicker: she’s probably in her mid-forties. Finally, I find my voice.
“Nope. I have a coupon, so…the smaller box is cheaper,” I offer, shaking the box in front of me with a smile. As if what I just said is a real panty dropper.
She nods, still smirking, and then I see her light brown eyes slowly move their way up my body until they’re back at my face again. One of her eyebrows quirks up playfully, insinuating she might like what she sees. She’s not even trying to hide it. 
“Shouldn’t you be buying Lucky Charms or something?”
I let out a small laugh and run a hand through my hair. “Do you mean, shouldn’t I be buying a kid’s cereal instead of something your grandpa probably eats?”
She shrugs. “Something like that.”
“Let’s just say my outward appearance is not a direct correlation to my mental maturity.”
She puts a hand on her hip and eyes me up and down again. “Is that so? Well, they say age is just a number, right? As long as that number is 18 or older.” She gives me a wink.
I almost keel over into the oatmeal, but I keep my cool. I return her flirtatious come-on with my own, flashing her a slanted smile as my gaze travels over her amazing body. I figure if she’s not going to be subtle, neither am I. 
“I can assure you two things. One, I am safely past that number. And two, if you need further proof, I’d be happy to demonstrate that I am most definitely not a kid.”
She lets out a breathy laugh and I pride myself on the fact that I may have flustered her.
“Cute and confident. I like that. Unless it’s all talk, of course.”
I cock my head to the side, a smug smirk on my face. “One way to find out.”
The corner of her mouth turns up, amused with this little game. “And what way is that?”
“Why don’t I whip it out and show you?”
I may have actually shocked her, because her eyes widen for just a split second before her devious grin is back. “Right here in the cereal aisle?”
I nod, and then reach into my pocket. I see her eyes wander down to my crotch. Then I pull out my wallet with a flourish and hold it up. She laughs loudly and genuinely, while I pretend I don’t understand, furrowing my brow in confusion.
“I was talking about my I.D. to show you my age. Did you think I meant something else?”
My face breaks into a grin and I put my wallet back. She smiles again. “Very clever. You must have a pretty big brain to go along with that handsome face.”
This a total, obvious set up, so of course I take the bait. “I haven’t had any complaints on size,” I answer, looking her dead in the eye.
She pauses for a second, as if mulling it over. Then she nods a little. “Hmmm,” she says, her pink lips pressed together. Without another word, she turns and starts pushing her cart down the aisle, away from me. I watch a little sadly, even though the view from behind is spectacular. I feel like I need to say something, so I call out.
“Aren’t you even going to give me your name?”
She doesn’t stop, but she answers back over her shoulder. “For now you can just call me Mrs. Robinson.” Then she pauses and turns to look at my stunned expression. “And if you understand that reference, then I hope we run into each other again very soon.”
I watch, dumbfounded, as she turns down the next aisle and is out of sight.
“Fuck,” I exhale out loud. Then I look down at my box of old man cereal and frown. “Of all the things I could be holding, did it have to be something that advertises the benefits of fiber? Couldn’t she have caught me with some wine or a goddamn box of magnum condoms?”
I glance up after I drop the box into my shopping basket, just as another woman passes by. This one, however, looks to be about 90 and is using a walker. Her confused look tells me there is nothing wrong with her hearing though, and she caught every word I just said out loud to myself. I smile, embarrassed.
“There’s good coupons in the ad today. Might want to check it out,” I offer.
She gives me a terse nod and she’s off, probably to buy the same cereal as me, and I head toward the check-out shaking my head at my dumbassery.
Five days later, and I’m back at the store. This isn’t my first trip back, hoping to run into the beautiful woman again. After learning through the way of the kid at the check-out that first day, I found out her name and situation. Apparently, she is quite the cougar on the hunt. At least according to Brad the bagger. She picks out a new piece of young, clueless arm candy at least once every couple of weeks. Even one of the stockboys in the back was chosen at one point. The stories he told the other guys at the store were legendary. She likes to be the teacher, and show them how to do things right. This is all hearsay, but I’m inclined to believe it after our little back-and-forth the other day.
She doesn’t know what I know, though. And that is the fact that I don’t need a teacher. I do things right the first time. And I do them pretty fucking well.
The woman has gotten under my skin. She is the excitement I have been looking for. And her age and my age, in this situation, aren’t a problem. It’s perfect, actually. So, each day since that day I saw her, I have been dressing in my black, three-piece suit and going back to the store. I look around, doing a few loops until I’m certain I’m not missing her, and then I buy some random item so I don’t look too suspicious. A carton of milk, a toothbrush, a stalk of celery. Brad the bagger has me figured out, though, and he gives me a lopsided smile that I know means “Better luck next time”.
This time, though, when I make my way down the frozen food aisle, I stop when I hear a voice from behind me.
“How did that cereal work out for you? Did you get enough fiber intake?”
I smile to myself before turning around. I put my hands in my pants pockets and spin on my heel, facing her head-on. She’s just as fucking gorgeous as the first time I saw her. Maybe even more. The tight, white, button-down shirt she is wearing is sleeveless, and I can see she is wearing a black bra underneath. It shows off her toned, tanned arms and just enough of her cleavage to make it interesting. The small shorts she has on are hugging her hips just right and those eyes of hers are framed in dark lashes that blink slowly as she looks me over. 
“Yes, actually. I think I got all of my nutritional needs met, thank you.”
She nods. “Nice suit.”
“Thanks.”
“You know, I wasn’t really sure I’d be seeing you again, but I’m glad we ran into one another. Must be fate.”
I nod. “Must be.” Then I give her a grin. “I definitely have not been coming here everyday hoping to run into you.”
Her eyebrows raise in surprise. “Well, you’re not very subtle, are you? I never did get your name.”
“Five Hargreeves,” I say, extending my hand.
Since the reset, the Hargreeves name lives on. If you bear the name of my adoptive, world-dominating father, that automatically means you are special. We all have powers and everyone knows it. But the Umbrella Academy as a team has ceased to exist, even in people’s memories. So, she doesn’t know who I am and it just sounds like I have a number as a name for no reason. Some of my siblings have changed their names to try and start over with a clean slate; hiding their powers from the rest of the public. Not me. I’m too old and set in my ways. Besides…I could have picked a different name a long time ago and chose not to. No use in doing it now.
“Hargreeves? So, you’re one of them?”
She takes my hand in hers to shake it, leaving it linger just a little too long. Her question isn’t accusatory or judgmental in any way. She only sounds curious.
“I am,” I answer, but I don’t follow it up with any detail.
“So what can you do?”
Her question is obviously about my powers, but I’d rather keep our little game going.
“Many, many impressive things.”
She gives me a half smile and nods her approval. “Five huh? Interesting. Well, my name is not actually Mrs. Robinson, as I’m sure you figured out. It’s –”
I interrupt her. “I know who you are.”
“Oh really? Am I that famous around here?”
“Seems that you are. You have quite the reputation.” I pause. “In a good way.”
She smiles coyly again. Then she turns to the glass doors of the freezers that are lined up against the wall. She opens the door and reaches in to grab a bag of vegetables, a white cloud puffing up around her from the cold. When she closes the door again, she turns to face me. I glance down at her chest. The cold air has caused her nipples to harden and are clearly visible through her tight shirt. She sees me notice and lets me stare for a few more seconds before dropping the bag into the basket looped over her arm.
“Since you’re here, would you mind helping me with something?” she asks, brushing her hair over her shoulder.
Her question jolts me out of my little daydream of running my tongue and teeth over those delicious looking peaks and I rub the back of my neck.
“Of course.”
She points back at the freezer. “Can you reach something on the top shelf for me?”
I nod and she opens the door, the blast of cold air hitting us both in the face. We’re standing close to one another now and I can see the fine wrinkles at the corners of her eyes and around her mouth. It somehow makes her look even sexier.
“What do you need?” I ask. She’s a couple inches shorter than me and I look down at her.
Her eyes don’t move off of mine when she answers. “I need some sausage.”
I almost laugh directly in her face, and I can see she is trying to hold it together, too. But we’re both having too much fun to break now. I glance up to the top shelf and sure enough, there is a box of breakfast sausages. I put my hand on one of them.
“These?”
She shakes her head. “The big one.”
With a giant grin, I grab the bigger box and pull them down. Then I close in on her, until we’re so close her perfect tits are practically rubbing against my chest. I see her take in a sharp breath.
“That’s the one,” she says with a nod. “Just put it in my basket. If it will fit.”
“Don’t worry. I can make it fit,” I say as I smirk and look down at the almost-full shopping basket.
There’s a small opening along the side and I push the box into it, shoving it in to make a snug fit.
“See? Perfect fit,” I assure her as my hand brushes against her bare arm. “You just have to know how to slide it in.”
We stand there a second longer, our bodies so close I am having a hard time not pulling her in and fucking her into the frozen tater tots. The ridiculous innuendos are making us smile, though, and pretty soon we’re both laughing. Her laugh is nice and I like hearing it. It feels good to laugh with someone.
“So, Five…do you still have more shopping to do?”
I look down at my empty hands, then back at her. “Nope. I got what I came for.”
With another thoughtful nod, she sets her basket on the floor. “You know, I just remembered I left my wallet at home, so I guess I won’t be able to pay for these.”
“That’s a shame. You probably shouldn’t be driving without a license, either. Maybe I should take you home.”
She reaches out and slowly pulls my tie out from inside the vest of my suit, running two fingers down the silk edge of it before dropping it again. 
“Well, aren’t you such a nice young man? You must have been a boy scout.”
I shake my head and put my hands back in my pockets, trying not to moan directly in her face from her touch and the way she’s looking at me. “Not exactly.”
She shrugs and turns around, walking away. Apparently, I am supposed to follow her like an obedient little puppy. And I will for right now. I can play this game, too. I’ll let her think I’m some dumb kid that doesn’t know how to work a vagina and will cum all over her hand the first time she touches my dick. But she doesn’t know I’m about to prove her very, very wrong. I exchange looks with Brad the bagger, who is giving me a thumbs up, as I follow her out the doors.
I lead her to my car, and she stops when we reach it, surprised at what she’s seeing.
“Wait, this is your car?”
“Why? You don’t like it?”
She shakes her head. “No, no, it’s great. It’s just I wouldn’t have guessed you’d be a Corvette Stingray guy.”
I walk around to the passenger side and open the door for her. It’s a nice day out and I have the top down. It’s also freshly washed, so the blue paint is shining. I watch her legs and ass as she slips inside onto the leather seat, and I close the door gently. When I cross over to the driver’s side and get in, she looks over at me with a smile and it doesn’t even feel awkward. We know what we’re doing, so there’s no need to try and pretend something else is going on here. 
“Where to?” I ask, turning the key in the ignition. The car roars to life.
Once she gives me directions, I peel out of the parking lot, rounding the corner at top speed and head out onto the main road. I like to drive fast, and when I look over at her, she is laughing; her hair blowing behind her in the wind and the sun shining on her face. Seeing her happy and excited like that makes me feel good. I kick it into fourth and whip around the cars in front of me.
We arrive a few minutes later. She lives in an unassuming house in an unassuming neighborhood. When she unlocks the door and lets me inside, I take a look around. The house is clean, tidy, and tasteful. I don’t know what I was expecting, but it wasn’t this. Maybe leopard print sofas or a sex swing in the middle of the living room. But, no, this is very much a normal looking home. 
“Please, make yourself at home,” she says, gesturing to the living room we’re standing in before walking into the open kitchen that is right next to it.
I shrug off my suit coat and do away with my tie, laying them across the back of an armchair. I unbutton the top couple buttons of my shirt and roll up my sleeves as I join her in the kitchen.
“Would you like a beer?” she asks, her hand on the refrigerator door.
I can’t stop staring at her, and I’m dying to see that body that I know is fucking gorgeous under those clothes. But, I wait.
“Actually, do you have any scotch?” I ask.
She looks surprised and then she tilts her head. “Yes, I do. I have damn good scotch, in fact.”
“Great.”
She points to a cabinet. “In there. There’s glasses just to the left.”
As I turn to open the cupboard, I say something about how I’m impressed with her choice of booze. I pull the stopper out and fill two glasses halfway.
“Most of my guests don’t appreciate good quality scotch.”
I hand her a glass and take a sip from my own. She’s right; it’s damn good.
“I’m willing to bet I’m not like most of your usual guests.”
She eyes me up over her glass and shakes her head. “No. So far, you’ve been surprising me.” She takes a drink and lowers her glass again. “So, these powers you have. What are they, exactly?”
This is the perfect invitation and my mouth pulls into a smirk. I set my glass down on the counter behind me. With no warning, I blink the few feet that separates us and I reappear almost on top of her, with my body brushing against hers as she audibly gasps.
I place a hand on the side of her neck, my thumb rubbing lightly across her cheek. “That,” I answer, before using my other hand to take her glass and set it down behind her.
I can see and feel her chest starting to rise and fall at a more rapid pace as she stares up at me, her lips slightly parted. I don’t want to wait anymore, so I lean in for a kiss. It’s soft at first, but when I feel her mouth respond to mine, it becomes more heated. Soon, I am pulling her to me with an arm around her waist. My hand is still on her neck, and I chance it by giving her hair a soft tug from behind. I hear her breathe in sharply through her nose and she presses into me further.
When we finally break away from one another, our heads still close together, we are breathing hard and fast. I push my groin against her so she can feel what she’s doing to me. I see a small smile form on her lips.
“Is this what you’ve been wanting from me?” I ask quietly.
She lets out a very soft sigh and closes her eyes before opening them again and pushing back against me.
“Among other things,” she says.
I nod before diving back onto her mouth again, hungry for more. Her hands run down my back and down to my waist, then back up my arms. I love the feeling of her hands on me and it’s getting me even more riled up.
I stop again, leaving her breathless. Without bothering with anymore questions, I rip her shirt open down the front, tearing the buttons apart until it’s fully open and I slide it down her arms, letting it drop to the floor. She doesn’t try to stop me and when I take a few seconds to admire the view of her magnificent tits in the thin black bra she is wearing, she gives me a smile. I run my hands over them and she tilts her head back.
“You’re fucking gorgeous,” I tell her. When she looks back at me, I raise one eyebrow. “But I think you already know that. Don’t you, honey?”
She gives me a small laugh. “Honey?”
I put my hands on either side of her waist and pull her in with a sharp tug and suddenly she’s not smiling anymore. But she is clutching at my shirt on my back.
“You know exactly what you’re doing with that amazing body of yours. And you like it when you have to show your little boy toys how to handle it, don’t you?”
She is looking up at me in surprise, her chest flush with mine and my dick grinding into her. She takes a loud breath in and her hands fall to my waist. Her mouth twitches up at the corner and she shakes her head.
“Damn. You figured me out.”
My hands find their way down to the front of her shorts and I start to slowly unbutton and unzip them, all while looking her directly in the eyes. I do not return her smile. I want her to know I mean business.
“That’s not what’s going to happen this time.”
I push her shorts down and they drop to the floor at her feet. Her small, black panties match the bra and I immediately want to tear those off, as well.
“What is going to happen, then?” she asks, still trying to maintain her air of coolness, but I can see I’m getting to her when she swallows hard.
I don’t answer, but I do drop to my knees in front of her and look up at her shocked face. I yank the panties down in one motion and she steps out of them. With one more look back up, I lean in and drag my tongue up her slit; slowly and deliberately, while she lets her eyes close and her head fall back. A soft whimper escapes her throat and her hips push subtly into me. She tastes so good, just like I knew she would, and I give her another long lick.
“We’re going to have some fun,” I tell her, before giving her a soft kiss right onto her sensitive mound. She makes another breathy noise above me, and I take that to mean she likes my plan.
I know she still doesn’t realize everything I am capable of yet, but she will. I have decided, as a personal challenge to myself, that by the time I am through with her she will be begging me for more. I’m going to ruin her so that she won’t even be able to think of anyone else but me. And I’m not going to stop until this wild cat is a domesticated house kitty, purring in my lap. The thought makes me grin salaciously before my mouth is back on her.
I don’t bother starting out slow. I’m eating her out, sucking at her clit and flicking my tongue over and into every crevice, all while gripping her thighs so tightly my fingers are digging into her skin. She moans out loud, and I push her roughly backward until she is clutching at the edge of the counter and her ass is up against it. I pull my face off of her just long enough for me to take a hand and slap the inside of one of her thighs. She looks down at me, startled.
“Spread them for me,” I demand.
She follows my instructions, widening her stance, and I go back in for more. I could eat this pussy all day, and I shove my tongue inside of her. Her slick is pouring out of her the more I work her over; coating my mouth in her delicious taste. The loud breathing and even louder moans I hear are turning me on and my cock is straining inside my pants.
“Fff…oh my g-ahhh…yes yes…ff-iii…”
I let out a tiny laugh because the sounds and words she’s saying make no sense. I can’t tell if she wants to say my name or curse, but either way I know I’m doing something right. I’ve got her brain all scrambled, which is what I was aiming for.
I keep going, fucking her with my hungry mouth while she gets more and more worked up. Her whines are becoming higher in pitch and she’s desperately trying to grind against my face. When I feel her hand on my head, her fingers laced in my hair, I know I’ve got her. She tries to push my face harder into herself.
“Five…keep going…more…” she stutters out, and I know she’s teetering on the edge.
Instead of letting her come all over my face, I immediately back off. She tries to pull me back in, but I don’t let her. I look up at her as I catch my breath, my mouth wet from her dripping pussy, and I love how fucking desperate and sad she looks right now.
“What…fuck…I was right there,” she pants, as if she thinks I made some mistake and I didn’t realize she was about to finish.
I shake my head slowly, like the smug asshole I am, and rise up until I’m looking down on her again. Her chest is heaving and she’s looking at me like she can’t quite believe what is happening.
“I know, sweetheart. That wasn’t fair, was it?” I ask condescendingly before giving her a kiss on her cheek.
She stares at me in disbelief for a second before one side of her mouth quirks up. “You were right. This is not how I thought this was going to go.”
I stroke her cheek and brush a piece of hair off her forehead. My movements are slow and gentle, and I’m taking my time. 
“But do you like it?” I ask quietly, before guiding her face to look at me with a hand on her chin.
She swallows nervously again, but that tiny smile is still there and there’s a hungry spark in her eyes. She nods.
“Yeah. I think I do.”
When she pulls me by my belt loops, hard so that my groin slams into her, I chuckle. “The more you want it, the more I’m going to make you wait.”
Her eyebrows draw together with frustration. It’s the first time she’s looked significantly younger than her age, and she almost appears to be on the verge of a temper tantrum. I can tell she’s used to getting her way all the time. I like teasing her, but I also don’t want to be that much of a jerk. Plus, holding out is killing me, too.
“How about this, I’ll give you a choice. I can either fuck you here, on the kitchen countertop; or we can go to the bedroom. Whichever you want.”
She makes a little gutteral noise in her throat and her eyes flutter close for half a second. She tries to push against me again, but I don’t let her.
“Bedroom,” she whispers.
I nod, pleased with her choice. There will be a bigger work area for me there. She takes me by the hand, leading me down a hallway. I know she’s a little embarrassed, because she’s completely undressed except for her bra, and I still have all of my clothes on. It further drives home the point that I’ve taken the reins here.
Once we’re in the bedroom, she tries to pounce on me again, but I gently push her back onto the bed. She doesn’t say anything, just looks up at me with those beautiful brown eyes and waits. I think she’s starting to understand the game now. As she watches, I strip off my shirt and pants. Then I climb over the top of her in nothing but my boxers. She immediately lies down on her back beneath me.
I begin kissing her again; hot, open-mouth kisses that have her shoving her tongue inside my mouth and pulling me down on top of her. I reach around to unhook her bra and throw that off to the side somewhere. Now she’s completely naked and I just have to take a minute to admire the view.
I raise up on my forearms, pulling away from her mouth, and look below me. Fuck. I’m not sure how it’s possible that I ended up with this absolute work of art that is dying for my dick inside of her right now, but here we are. It’s a goddamn miracle, is what it is. 
“Do you know how stunningly beautiful you are?” I ask sincerely, still not taking my eyes off her luscious curves.
This seems to make her a little flustered and I even see her blush a little. It has me thinking that maybe these dumbass toddlers that she’s been bringing back here haven’t exactly been as appreciative as I am. They apparently didn’t realize that they should have been worshiping her, not just fucking her and leaving. What a tragedy.
She laughs quietly. “Ok.”
“I’m not kidding,” I tell her, looking her in the eyes again. “You’re the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever met in my life.”
When I say that, our eyes locked on one another, I can feel something click between us. A connection is made. I can see that she believes me and I’ve made her feel good about herself. But there’s something else there, too. Something I don’t know how to describe. But I like it.
“Thank you,” she whispers with a smile.
She reaches up to push my hair back off my face, and then she is pulling me down again with a hand on the back of my neck. I let her take the lead for just a second because it feels so good. My body is covering hers as we trade more deep kisses back and forth, and I position myself so that my hard cock is pressing between her legs. She moans into my mouth and opens her legs wider for me. 
I keep at it, rubbing up against her; the cotton fabric of my boxers creating a shield of friction between us, but she is still getting off on it. It obviously feels amazing to me, too, and I am honestly thinking of foregoing this whole orgasm denial thing I’ve got going on and just fucking her as hard as possible right now. But I don’t. I continue to rut into her as she presses harder and harder against me, jerking her hips up and digging her nails into my bare shoulders.
“Oh my god,” she whines next to my ear. “Please…”
I smile to myself, my face hidden in the crook of her neck. I give her a sharp bite that makes her squeak. 
“I love that you’re so needy,” I tell her, moving to the other side of her neck and sucking a bruise onto it. “I bet you never begged for someone’s cock before, have you?”
She doesn’t answer, probably because she’s either too focused on humping me or she’s embarrassed that I called her out. Either way, it’s a win for me. She keeps grinding against me, her actions becoming faster and more desperate. I can feel her hot, wet pussy with each pass over my dick, and oh fuck, it makes me want to lose my mind. I can’t even really believe I’m holding out this long, but I’ve made it this far I guess. Let’s keep this going.
As soon as she is completely lost in her own little world, eyes closed and hands clutching at my arms and back, I can see she’s so close to coming again. She’s making small grunting noises and whimpers as she rams her swollen clit against me. 
“Oh shit…oh shit…” she starts chanting and her grip on my skin tightens.
The grin on my face is extremely cruel as I suddenly move off her, sitting on my knees in between her legs. Her hips move up, only to meet nothing but air and her eyes fly open.
“What the fuck!”
Her eyes are wide and she’s breathing like a freight train. Her hips keep twitching just slightly, like they haven’t quite caught up to the rest of her body yet. She looks pretty pissed off and it’s adorable.
“Did you think I was going to let you get off just from grinding on my dick like that?” I shake my head, pitying her. “Honey…I thought you figured this out.”
“You are a bastard,” she fumes, her jaw clenched tight.
“It’s really hard to take you seriously when you’re wearing nothing but the marks I just gave you. You’re still so soaking wet for me I can see the evidence in a pool on the sheets.”
She’s quiet again and a soft blush blooms across her chest. I know it is killing her to be this vulnerable right now, so I decide to throw her a bone. Still resting on my knees, I pull my boxers down over my cock, letting her have a good look before maneuvering them the rest of the way off. I stay where I am and make her watch.
Taking my rock hard dick in my hand, I give it a few slow strokes while maintaining eye contact with her. She has propped herself up on her elbows and she’s practically drooling over what she’s seeing. I might not be porn star-level big, but in the scheme of things, it’s mildly impressive. At least, she seems to think so.
“Damn,” she rasps out before looking me in the eyes again. She is dead serious when she tells me, “I want you to fuck me with that.”
I laugh because I just can’t help it and even she smiles at that. I reach down and take one of her hands, pulling her up towards me so that she is sitting up.
“Come here,” I say gently, although my face is back to being serious. She shuffles forward a little and I grab her around the waist, positioning her so that she is straddling my lap while I stay kneeling.
The position makes my cock rub against her slit again, and she’s already trying to roll her hips into me. I let her do that a few times, mostly because it feels so goddamn good, but then I hold her still with my hands on either side of her waist.
“I know how badly you want this. And I’m going to give it to you, don’t worry. But you’re going to have to be a little more patient, ok sweet girl?”
My tone is patronizing and she doesn’t like it. But after a few seconds she gives me a small nod. I go back to kissing her, because I seem to not be able to get enough of her lips against mine, and I tangle my fingers in her hair. She groans when I give it a sharp tug.
Without pulling away, I move my hands back down to her hips and start to guide her. Very slowly, I move her body over mine, so that her dripping wet slit is sliding back and forth over my dick. I let out a long, low moan and tighten my grip on her. 
“Please,” she’s whimpering against my mouth again.
“Please what, sweetheart?” I tease, moving my lips to her neck and her shoulder while still keeping control of her pace on top of me.
“Please fuck me.”
It’s so pathetic the way she’s whining that I want to laugh. But I’m also pretty damn close to begging too, and I have to keep trying to focus on not letting myself slip inside of her just yet.
I shake my head, denying her request, but I do pick up the pace a little. I start moving her faster, until she’s grinding hard onto my shaft and I can see she’s just about ready to come again. 
“How do you feel, sweetheart? Is that good?” I ask softly near her ear.
She nods, her eyes still closed. “God, yes…so fucking good. I’m almost there…please.”
“I know you are,” I tell her.
She starts whining and moaning louder and grinding into me harder and she thinks I’m going to let her finally give in to her orgasm, but just as I see her start to tip over that edge, I use my strength to throw her off of me so that she is on her back again.
“Fiive…”
She draws my name out in a long, demoralized cry that is so sad and so pitiful, with her eyes that are pleading for me and her mouth open while she gasps for breath. Oh fuck…I need her.
This time I don’t tease or prolong anything. I’m hard as a rock and dripping with pre-cum and I need to be inside of her now. But there’s one last thing I’m going to make her do for me.
I grab onto her again, and instead of throwing her around, I use my handy spatial manipulation powers and blink us both into the position I want. This is always a risky move that could end with someone accidentally sailing onto the floor or my genitals being smashed into a pancake, but luckily I get it right. I land on my back and she is on top of me. She lets out a short shriek of surprise, but when she realizes what happened she smiles down at me.
“Ride me,” I tell her, not even bothering with an explanation of how or why I flung her through the vacuum of space. “Now,” I emphasize through gritted teeth, in case she was not getting the point.
She gets it, though, because it only takes her a couple of seconds before she is sinking down onto my cock until I’m fully buried in her tight sleeve, and holy shit, it’s the best thing I’ve ever felt in my life.
We both let out a loud moan from how amazing it feels after all of the anticipation. She leans back, grabbing my legs behind her for leverage, and she starts to rock her hips forcefully on top of me. I reach up to squeeze and mold each breast in my hands, watching as her beautiful mouth drops open and her head falls back.
Her movements are driving me crazy, but I still want more. I lower my hands so I can clutch at her hips again, but not before I slap her on the ass with a loud smack. That got her attention and her head snaps up again, eyes wide.
“Look at me,” I demand.
She does and I hold her gaze while I pump her body faster and harder on top of me. I’m pushing my own hips up against her, trying to feel as much of her as humanly possible, but I swear it’s still not enough.
“Fuck me harder. Come on, harder,” I tell her, and I vaguely wonder if I sound as pathetic as she did earlier. I don’t care. I’ll beg on my knees if I can get more of what I’m feeling right now.
She bites at her lower lip in concentration and nods at my request, speeding up her forceful thrusts until she’s almost all the way off of my dick before slamming back down again. Her tits are bouncing so perfectly and her face is flushed. I really don’t know how much longer I’m going to be able to last when I look at her like that.
I’m starting to sweat now with how hard I’m working at trying to drill into her, and all the while I’m feeling that warm, amazing feeling in my lower abdomen that means I’m about to lose it. I see by her face and hear from her high-pitched mewls that she is close, too. I’ve got to dial it up a notch, so I move one hand off her hip and start vigorously rubbing her clit with my thumb.
That does it, and she starts thrashing erratically, head tilted back, while she wails like she’s in pain. I know she’s not though, because after another second her pussy is fluttering tightly around my cock and she’s screaming so loud I would be shocked if it weren’t for the fact that I’m also coming fast and hard.
“Fuuuckk,” I yell out, joining her shaking and shuddering body with my own spasms as I push her down as hard as I can manage while unleashing my cum inside of her.
It takes several minutes of loud panting and aftershocks, while she lays on top of my chest and I stroke her back. I’ve never experienced anything that intense before, but I really hope I get to again sometime soon. I finally start to slip out of her and she rolls off of me to lie next to me. 
I don’t know what it is, but there’s some weird connection between us, and I know she can feel it too. It doesn’t matter that I teased her mercilessly and stripped her of all of her control. I smile over at her and lean in for a kiss while trying to smooth her tangled hair down. 
“I wasn’t expecting this,” she says with a small laugh, and I know she’s talking about picking up a supposedly naive kid and having them rock her world, but it has another meaning too. She wasn’t expecting to feel like this. And neither was I.
I shake my head with a smile and trace her lips with my fingers. “Me either. But I think I could get used to it.”
“Me, too.” She pauses and looks a little nervous. “Normally I wouldn’t ask this, but…do you want to stay for a while?”
I don’t even pretend to think about it or try to play cool. “Yes, I’d love that.” When she smiles, she looks so relieved and happy, and I go in for another kiss. “Go get cleaned up and I’ll go grab our drinks. But I want you right back here in bed for me, ok?”
I was sort of teasing, but she smiles her gorgeous smile and nods her head. “Ok.”
Once we’re back in bed, with me propped against the headboard and her leaning against my chest, we gradually sip our scotch and I run my fingers through her hair.
“So, I have to ask. You don’t seem in any way like any other man your age. Why is that? How are you so different?”
I pause for a second while I decide if I want to get into all of that. But then I think, why the hell not? I like this woman and if she wants to know about me, I might as well start with the big truth.
“Well, get comfortable, because this may take a while.”
☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️
It’s a month later and I’m back at the same grocery store. I only needed a few things and I wait in line until it’s my turn to check out. As I watch my items get scanned over the red laser, Brad the bagger steps up to help out. He recognizes me and gives me a big grin.
“Good to see you, it’s been a while.” He takes a look around. “I haven’t seen her here in a while, not sure why. But, hey, did you ever seal the deal before? Me and some of the guys in back have a bet going.”
“Is that right?” I say with a sly grin. “Which way did you bet?”
Brad looks shocked like it could be any other answer. “That you did, of course! I saw the way she was looking at you; like the cougar caught her meal for the night.”
He laughs at his joke and I smile a little, just as my girl comes jogging up behind me to put a jar of olives on the belt before my order is finished.
“Here you go, honey, sorry it took me forever to find it,” she pants, slightly out of breath. “Are those the right ones?”
I smile down at her and nod. “Yes, darling, thank you.”
As she squeezes past me, pleased with my praise, I give her a small smack on the ass. She turns around and rolls her eyes at me before flashing me one of her pretty smiles that makes me want to melt onto the linoleum floor beneath my feet.
“I’m going to wait in the car,” she tells me, before giving Brad a little wave on her way past.
I swear, it looks like every bagger and stock boy in the whole damn store has now gathered nearby and are staring in awe at the scene they just witnessed. I pretend I don’t notice, but I can’t help feeling proud of myself and it’s hard to keep the smile off my face. As I am paying and taking my bag from Brad, I hear someone in the crowd whisper a little too loudly.
“Did you see that? How the fuck did that dude tame the cougar?”
I definitely can’t keep the smug look off my face now and I nod at the group of jackass kids on my way out the door. “Gentleman.”
Then I head on out to my Stingray, where my dream girl is waiting patiently for me.
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runningfrom2am · 1 year ago
Text
leveling the playing field II
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summary: you didn't meet the requirements for the plinth prize, only to find out that you're not just missing out on that- you're missing out on the opportunity of a lifetime. your friend wants to help, because maybe you can help each other.
pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader
wc: 2.8k
tags/warnings: capitol brat!reader, maybe slightly ooc coryo, idk i tried my best. do they love each other or hate each other? who knows. also someone dies (but its not too graphic), mentions of blood and violence you guys get the vibes.
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a/n: embarrassed to say this is grabbing me by the cuff of my shirt and yanking me out of writer's block sorry to everyone who followed for drew's characters lmao. anyway idek if any of this is any good but as long as i'm writing something i'm pleased.
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Coriolanus clenched his jaw as he watched you eat from the plate of fruit your maid brought up after you called for tea, hoping that somehow you would just miss the sound of his stomach growling. He had said no, but you insisted because you were hungry. You don't even know what hungry feels like- he's already regretting letting you help him.
"So," You start, covering your mouth as you finish chewing so you could get down to strategy. If you were going to help, you had to go at this wisely. "What is your plan? Lay it out for me. I'll give you my thoughts."
"I talked to Tigris, she agreed that I need to get Lucy Gray to trust me." He tells you. "She said she would want someone here to care about her. That will have to be me."
"Okay." You nod, reaching for another slice of apple on the plate, trying to ignore the way his eyes track the fruit all the way from your plate to your lips. "So, I'm doing a more behind-the-scenes thing. I think that's better, for us and her. I don't want her to be overwhelmed."
"Yeah." Coryo agrees, staring at you. At this point, it's driving you crazy.
"Coryo." You state, pushing the dish across the coffee table in his direction. "Eat. Please."
"No, I couldn't." He tries to politely decline and you raise an eyebrow at him.
"I insist. It was made for two, I can't possibly stomach it all. It would be a shame for it to go to waste." You had laid your cards out just minutes earlier, making it clear you both knew more about each other's home lives than you cared to discuss, but that didn't mean you would torture him with it.
He hesitates before grabbing a slice and taking a few bites, looking past you and out the window. He wouldn't want it to go to waste like you said, after all.
"I won't tell anyone, you know." You say, your tone walking a line between joking and being serious. He'll interpret that in whatever way he chooses, and you're okay with that.
"I should be going, actually." He says, dropping the other half of the apple slice back onto the dish and standing up, smoothing the creases in his slacks.
You stand up as well, making your way to the door and ringing the bell that summons your maid. "I'll walk you out, just give me a second." You explain to him, and by the time you're done your sentence, she is there looking at you expectantly. "Take these leftovers and pack them up for my friend." You tell her, pointing to the mostly full plate. "And pack some of those pastries you made for his family as well, if you don't mind. Oh! And that bread, it will go bad soon if someone doesn't eat it." She just nods silently as you speak, walking past you to take the plate before leaving.
"Thank you." Coriolanus mutters through gritted teeth once your maid is out of earshot.
"Like I said," You smile. "I don't want it to go to waste."
The morning the tributes arrived, Coriolanus was late to class. He had never been late to class, not once, and you would know- because you hadn't either. Not that you were worried, but it was almost the only thing you could think about. It was odd, but he must have gone to greet Lucy Gray. That would be the only thing that made sense.
"Your little excursion is in violation of about five Academy rules, Mister Snow." Dean Highbottom says as the blonde boy walks in, uniform disheveled as he finds his seat across the room from you.
You make eye contact only briefly with him as the Dean goes on about how endangering the life of a student is against the rules, and your friend would be accumulating a demerit over the whole thing.
From what you can gather, he did go see Lucy Gray, which went farther than he intended when he ended up escorting her all the way into the monkey cage at the zoo. To you, that was comically appropriate. To Sejanus, it was a crime. Of course it was, his heart never left District Two. As much as you had your differences, Sejanus was a kind boy. You did like him, only after you got it through your mind that if you were to leave the Capitol, you would always be Capitol at heart. You're pulling on a loose string on the hem of your uniform sleeve, more, more, until you've almost undone the whole length of your wrist. When the thread breaks you want to hit something, for little to no reason, and you bite into your bottom lip.
You don't even know why you're so mad. You have a short fuse and you know that, maybe it's about Coryo. Maybe it's about your sleeve that's now slightly longer on one side.
You're drawn from your thoughts as Clemensia stands up from her seat next to Coryo, addressing Dr. Gaul who, as far as you know, had only been in the room for a minute or so. "Coriolanus and I do all our assignments together, I think it would be fitting for us to write up the proposal together too. I have some good ideas for things to be incorporated into the games along with betting." Your eyes roll so hard at this that it makes your head ache.
"I brought her a rose from Grandma'am's garden and she ate it. She needs food." Coryo tells you, walking alongside you down the hall.
"I'll get something together for her. Would you like to come with me to pick it up and then we can go to the zoo?" You ask, adjusting your shoulder bag as he holds the front door open for you.
"Okay. Are you sure you should come?"
"If you would like me to." You shrug, leading him in the direction of your parent's town car.
He thinks on it for a moment. Does he want you to meet Lucy Gray? You were technically also her mentor, even if you were taking a backseat. It struck him again, harder somehow, when he met her in person how similar she was to you. Besides the distinct accent, every word that came out of her mouth sounded as though it could have been written in a script by you. If you were district, that is. It was hard to wrap his mind around.
"I would." He finally answers, more so on impulse than resulting from his thought process.
You smile, linking your arm around his as you approach the vehicle.
"Then we can drop you at Clem's. if you'd like." You offer bitterly and he just gives a curt nod in response.
After getting your maid to pack some food for Lucy Gray with some extra for the two of you, assuming you would be gone for the evening, you got a ride to the zoo. The atmosphere was exciting, with people and children crowding the bars- this time including a few of your classmates. Sejanus, which you had expected, and Arachne- no doubt there to get attention.
"Lucy Gray!" Coryo called out, summoning the girl toward the two of you as you approached the bars marking the edge of the enclosure.
"Well hello, Coriolanus. You brought a friend, care to introduce us?" She smiles, looking between the two of you. Admittedly, you admire her poise, given the situation. Politeness in front of the cameras was a must- she's doing an exemplary job in humanizing herself.
"Lucy Gray, this is my friend Y/N Y/L/N. Y/N, meet Lucy Gray." He nods between the two of you and you reach through the bars to shake her hand.
"Hello. Pleasure to meet you." You smile at her, which she returns.
"You as well." She nods, clearly impressed as she looks between you and Coryo. You had decided back at your home to not introduce yourself as another mentor, just as a friend, after gushing the reaction to the other tributes thinking Lucy Gray was getting special treatment this morning when her mentor was the only one to show up. "Coriolanus, is Miss Y/L/N here your sweetheart?"
His face flushes red as he shakes his head, refusing to look at you. You laugh, not noticing his change in undertone as you answer for him. "No, no. Just a friend." You explain, digging in your bag for her food, wanting to quickly change the subject. "We brought you this." You hold out the napkin for her, containing a sandwich, a couple of desserts, and some plums.
"Oh wow, thank you!" Lucy Gray smiles, accepting it gratefully. "Hey, Jessup! Come eat." She calls out to the other tribute from her district, who you remember was assigned to Lysistrata Vickers.
He comes over, but doesn't acknowledge either of you as Lucy Gray holds out one of the dessert bars to him. "I'm not hungry."
"It won't do you any good to starve now. You need your energy." Lucy Gray insists, practically shoving it into his hand.
"I hope you like blueberry." You cut in. "It's a blueberry biscuit with pistachio filling. Made fresh this morning- I promise it's good."
He doesn't say anything, taking it and retreating to the rock he was previously sitting on to eat.
"Will you be sharing everything with him?" Coryo asks her quietly as he walks away.
"Why? So I can keep my energy up enough to strangle him? I don't think that will matter much in a few days."
"You can't trust anyone once the games start, so why trust them now?" You reply quietly, scanning over the other tributes, eyes landing on Arachne taunting her tribute. Of course she would- her arrogance never fails to impress you.
"Your friend over there seems just lovely." Lucy Gray says sarcastically, eyes following yours as you watch your classmate.
"Not our friend." You and Coryo respond at the same time.
"She's poison with perfect teeth." He continues and you nod.
"One thing I learned in twelve is that hunger is a weapon." Lucy Gray says. You're not sure what she means, but you nod anyway.
"Here, let's sit." You suggest, changing the subject as you crouch down to lay out a cloth on the ground to place the food on.
As you're laying it out carefully between the bars for Lucy Gray, you can feel Coryo's eyes burning into the backs of your hands. Lucy Gray notices this too, handing him a cookie from the pile.
"No, I couldn't." His default response. "You need it more than me."
"You were staring. Here, we'll share." She insists and he takes it gratefully, breaking off a piece and placing it in his mouth.
"Here..." You mumble, digging through your bag again and pulling out the glass container designated for his dinner. You place it in his lap, not giving him the chance to turn it down. "Packed it just for you."
He takes it off his lap, tensely getting up. "I'll be back in a moment." He tells you both, red uniform disappearing behind the small crowd.
"You can see it too?" Lucy Gray asks you, nibbling on half of a sandwich.
You nod slightly, eyes still trying to track him to see where he went, then landing on him talking to Sejanus who's desperately trying to get his tribute, Marcus, to eat some of the food he brought.
"He's quite sensitive about it." You explain. "I appreciate you being kind to him. No one else knows... I think. Regardless, you are very important to him."
She nods a little bit, watching you watch your friend. "Are you just buttering me up?" She jokes and you shake your head, returning your attention to the girl across from you.
"No, I mean it. It's more than the prize for us." You state. "Him." You quickly correct yourself. "I just want to help however I can, if you need anything else just ask, but I'll bring food every day. Or I'll send it with Coryo."
"Coryo, huh?"
"Well, yes. We've been friends for years."
"I see." Lucy Gray nods, both of you watching him make his way back over. You lift up his container of food and hand it to him before he even has the chance to sit down.
"What about you, Lucy Gray? Any friends back home? Family?" You ask, looking away from him as he sits. You want him to eat, but you know he would loathe you for watching, so you direct all your attention to her.
"I'm an orphan, just like Coryo here." She nods to him and his brows furrow at the nickname coming from someone new. "It's just me and the Covey."
"Covey?" You ask.
"Yeah, they're my family and we perform together. It's how we make our change."
"Well, you are a very talented singer. Jaws were on the floor in the Capitol during your performance." You smile. 
"I'm not one to go quietly, that's all."
"I'm not either." You agree. "I think we'll be fine friends."
Just at that moment, the three of you hear a scream that has you turning your heads as fast as lightning over to the source, catching the end of Arachne getting her throat slit by her tribute. You and Coriolanus are on your feet in seconds, running over to try and help her just as gunfire rings out, taking down her tribute for the crime of her murder.
You pull off your blazer, both you and Coryo using it to try and stop the bleeding, but you could tell it was no use. By the time you look up, the crowd of spectators was completely gone having rushed for the exits during the attack.
Just as you both realize it's no use, and that she's already dead, you're being pulled away by peacekeepers.
"Hey! Let me go right this second!" You shout, trying to pull away.
"You kids have to get out of here." One of them answers blankly.
"I have to get my stuff!" You complain, trying to wiggle out of their strong grip. "You want me to leave my knife over within reach too? Are you stupid?"
They stop, sighing as they let you go. "Thank you." You huff, readjusting your shirt before walking back over to where you were just sitting with Lucy Gray, quickly gathering your things but leaving food for her.
"Lucy Gray, are you alright?" You ask, seeing her lying on the ground a few feet away from the bars now, just getting up.
She just nods, the fear in her eyes starting to cease. 
"You're not shot?" You follow up with, looking over her at the same time she does.
"No, I'm fine. You go." She replies, standing up again and dusting off her dress.
"Thank god. Those idiots are awful shots!" You bite, looking back at the peacekeepers over your shoulder, Coriolanus now nowhere to be seen.
You stand up and pull your bag across your body, walking past them toward the exit as they attempt to guide you in the right direction. "Don't touch me!" You hiss, smacking their hands away.
"Coryo!" You call out, running to catch up with him in the academy hall the next morning. He slows down, glancing over his shoulder and stopping to wait for you.
"Y/N." He states, looking at you expectantly. 
"Shall we go see Lucy Gray today?" You ask, reaching up to tighten your ponytail that had come loose in your jog.
"No." He shakes his head, continuing to walk and you follow after him. 
"What? Why not? She needs us to bring her food, and we have to-"
"I'll discuss the games with her at the planned meeting this afternoon. You won't be going back to the zoo."
"Excuse me?" You ask, grabbing his arm to stop him in his tracks. "I know I'm like, your assistant, or whatever, but you will not tell me what I can and cannot do."
"It's too dangerous. They are dangerous." Coriolanus argues. "I won't have you ending up like Arachne."
He had been up all night writing his proposal for Dr. Gaul. It was the only thing that could get his mind off the death of his classmate, and off of you. What if it had been you? He should have known it was dangerous, it was his fault. It was his idea that the mentors get closer to the tributes and someone was killed. Arachne's blood was on his hands, and he was just relieved that it wasn't yours staining his uniform instead.
"No. No, she died because she was stupid." You whisper, looking around. "She taunted her tribute and handed her a knife, at that point it's natural selection. I am not her. I am smarter."
He stares down at you, scanning over your features as you beg him to let you continue to help. "You need me, Coriolanus. Admit that much to yourself."
"I don't need you," He spits back. "But I like you much better alive. You are the one person in this school I can stand, I won't lose you over something so reckless." He pulls his arm from your grasp and walks off.
You look around, seeing your classmates staring and you roll your eyes. "Take a picture or something." You say to no one in particular, prompting people to avert their eyes.
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janeyseymour · 1 year ago
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Fire in My Heart (Repost due to mistake)
Anon asked for a mel x firefighter!reader, and I posted, but didn't realize I left out the end of it, so... repost!
Summary: There's an incident at Abbott, and you and your crew come to the rescue.
WC: ~3.4k
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The two of you always joke about how ridiculous it is that you actually managed to find each other. Growing up, you had almost always had a crush on your teachers- particularly the ones with red hair. And for Melissa, she was absolutely fascinated with anything that had to do with firefighting as a little girl- it felt like it was in her blood to do something that had to do with fighting fire. 
You nudge her. So maybe she wasn’t doing something that had to do with fighting fire... but she was doing someone who fought fires for a living. She teases you right back.
“I’m sorry Ms. ‘I had a crush on all of my female teachers’.”
“Correction: I had a crush on most of my female teachers,” you tell her. Then you playfully shudder. “No one could’ve had a crush on Ms. Adams.”
“Okay, sorry,” Melissa rolls her eyes as she continues to pack your meals for your shift at the station. “I’m sorry Ms. ‘I had a crush on most of my female teachers.”
You shrug. “Eh, it worked in my favor. I got the hottest redheaded second grade teacher t’go out with me,” you grin as you wrap your arms around her waist. 
“Hell yeah it did,” she chuckles as she turns over in your arms to face you. “You got yourself a Philly eleven, and I got myself a Philly twelve. We’re the hottest couple in this city.”
You pat her backside as you realize you have to let her go. “Alright, babe. I’ll be home later tonight. Don’t start any Schemmenti style fires now?”
“I can’t make any promises, an’ you know that,” your girlfriend grumbles. “I swear, if Janine says one more thing about the stupid book fair, I’ll-”
“You’ll call your girlfriend and rant to her instead of bludgeoning the poor woman with a
copy of Peter Rabbit or lighting something on fire,” you tell her seriously. “Jesus, how did I end up dating someone from an arsonist family?”
“And that worked out in my favor,” Melissa wears a smirk on her face. “We Schemmenti’s can start the fires, but no one expects the chief’s family to be the ones starting them.”
“Please tell me that isn’t why you’re dating me,” you roll your eyes as she hands you your lunch bag.
“It’s not,” she promises you before adding on. “But it don’t hurt.”
You chuckle before picking up the rest of your bags. “Don’t start any fires that make my department have to come out to rescue you today.”
“That’s never happened,” Melissa retorts.
“Don’t let today be the first!” you call as you reach for the door. “I’ll see you later tonight, I love you!”
You can’t believe you have to go respond to a call from Abbott Elementary. As you’re driving, you have half a mind to call your girlfriend. She answers on the first ring.
“Melissa Ann Schemmenti, this fire that I’m responding to better not be because of-”
“It wasn’t me,” the second grade teacher tells you. She pulls away from the phone just slightly to scold a student for getting out of line. “Maya, this is a real fire! This is not a drill! Stop doing the Gritty!”
“Is everyone out of the building?” you grit out as you drive just the slightest bit faster.
The teacher looks around at all of the teachers holding up green pieces of paper. “Yes. And when you get here, don’t even bother looking for-” your phone clicks off. You assume a coworker of hers had come up to her, and no one knew that the two of you were dating.
As you pull up to the building, it’s clear that whatever set the alarm off isn’t too big of a deal. Still, you and your crew go in to survey the area. You know Melissa’s room number, and you immediately head in that direction, barking out orders to your coworkers as you go.
Melissa’s room looks perfect. It’s so... her. It’s filled with various signed sports gear and merchandise, but it also is flooded with pictures and drawings from the kids, and you can clearly see the bulletin board that displays different school projects they’ve completed. You nearly swoon.
You do a quick lap as you continue to make sure she didn’t somehow secretly start this fire. You stop at her desk when you see just the smallest corner of something sticking out from underneath her mousepad. You have to make sure it’s not any sort of evidence, so you lift her mousepad. Underneath, there’s a picture of the two of you. You do swoon at this. Even though neither of you are out, she still has a reminder of the two of you with her at all times.
“Oh, Mel,” you whisper, a smile appearing on your face. You quickly pull yourself together and continue on. You don’t see anything else that would make anybody suspicious of the Italian teacher, so you continue to the next rooms.
Janine’s room is quite the opposite of Melissa’s. You can’t explain why because she too has some memorabilia from sporting events in Philly, but-
“Hey, Y/N,” one of your men comes down the hall holding up a burnt shawl and a candle. “It looks like we found the culprit of this mess. Just a small little thing really in the teacher’s lounge.”
You release a breath you didn’t know you were holding. You were fairly certain your girlfriend hadn’t caused the fire... but now it was confirmed that you wouldn’t have to be bailing her out of jail today.
With a nod, you exit the building and tell everybody it’s safe to go back inside. Melissa is all grins when she sees you, but you remain professional. And she’s able to play it off that she’s beyond excited that they brought a tractor drawn aerial. 
She makes her way over to you. “Can I bring the kids out to look at the-”
You roll your eyes and nod. “But I can only stall for so long before the boys will start to catch on.”
Your girlfriend practically sprints away, giggling with glee, as she goes inside to retrieve her kiddos. 
When she brings out her students, you have to pretend like you’re annoyed that she’s wasting your time. 
“Ma’am,” you say. “We really do have to get-”
“Ain’t you the one who’s doin’ the fire safety meeting for the teachers later today anyway?” she challenges you, fully knowing you are.
You sigh. “Yes, ma’am.”
“Then you can stick around.” You don’t miss the wink and the licking of her lips. She finds you irresistible in your uniform.
While the kids are at lunch and recess, you have to hold the fire safety meeting. And Melissa is as brash as ever. You unfortunately have to ban open fires, and this sets off Barbara.
As Melissa runs out of the room, she gives you a look that asks for silent forgiveness, and you nod. You know she has to go check up on her best friend, and you need to continue your meeting.
After Barbara admits that she’s been dealing with Gerald’s health scare and the candle was 100% an accident, Melissa feels terrible. But she knows how she might be able to turn Barb’s mood around.
“I think I might have a roundabout way of getting you to be able to keep lighting your candles,” the redhead smirks.
“What do you- you heard the chief: no more open flames.”
“I can call in a favor,” Melissa nudges her. “I’m sure the chief can do something special for her girlfriend.”
The kindergarten teacher’s eyes go wide. “For her- her girl- Melissa Ann Schemmenti, how long have you kept this from me?!”
“I wasn’t keepin’ nothin’ from you,” your girlfriend laughs. “Ya never asked, so I never had to tell.”
“Oh, girl,” Barb howls. “You have some nerve, not telling me. I’m gonna need more details.”
“Maybe later,” Melissa rolls her eyes. “None of youse know, and none of her department knows we’ve been dating for the last three years and living together for the last year and a half.”
The kindergarten teacher looks at her best friend incredulously. “I’ve been to your house!”
“She’s always on shift, and we don’t have many printed pictures together; just digital copies,” the redhead shrugs. “Now c’mon. I have to convince my girlfriend to let my best friend continue to have candles. And then I gotta get my kids back outside to play on the truck.”
“Haven’t they been playing on the truck all day?”
“No,” she admits with a laugh. “That was my time. Now it’s theirs while I flirt with my girlfriend.”
“Miss fire chief?” Melissa asks all too innocently as the kids explore and play on your truck.
“Yes ma’am?” you reply, committed to your work persona of badass fire chief.
She glances around. Your coworkers are distracted with the kids, so she pulls herself slightly closer to you. “You think I can call in a favor?”
“And that would be?”
“Let Barb light her candles in exchange for her not killing me for not telling her about you?” Melissa asks hopefully. 
You hazard a glance at her. “Melissa.”
“I also need your help putting out my fire,” she says coyly as she daringly grabs your thigh. “Seeing you in uniform is... wow, babe.” She knows you��ll say yes now.
“Fine,” you groan. “But if this happens again, it’s on you. You hear me?”
“Yes, chief,” the teacher grins and mock salutes you. She stands next to you for a few more minutes before she has to call her kids back into the building for dismissal.
“Alright my little eagles, everybody say thank you to the firefighters!” Melissa grins. Her students do as she asks before they all head back in. She mouths a ‘thank you, love you’ to you while everyone else is preoccupied.
As you and your coworkers are heading back to the station, you hear one of them mention that ‘that redheaded teacher was a smokeshow’. You grip the wheel just a bit tighter. You almost say something right there, but you let them go. They’re right. Your girlfriend is a smokeshow, and she sure as hell knows it. They only continue making comments about her though, and suddenly you aren’t so happy.
One of the boys starts making rather vulgar comments, and-
“Oi,” you call from the front. “Will y’quit havin’ fantasies about my girlfriend?”
All of their eyes snap to you. “W-what, chief?”
“Stop thinking about my girlfriend like that,” you tell them again. “Or we’s gonna have a bigger problem than some little candle fire.”
“She’s your girlfriend?”
“Yeah, she is,” you huff. “Melissa. She’s a Schemmenti, and she’s mine. So any thoughts you have or had about her, clear your brains out, or I’ll have your asses. Are we clear?”
“Yes, ma’am,” they all mutter, heads down. Some of their cheeks are red.
“Wait a minute,” one of the younger firemen catches on. “Is she the one who made the ziti you brought to our Christmas party last year?” You nod. “Do you think she could make it again? That shit was off the charts. But, uh... only if she’s got time. Don’t wanna pressure her.”
“I’ll see what I can do,” you laugh. “She’s been pretty busy lately, teaching two grades. But maybe I can convince her to bring a couple trays of food down for all youse.”
Unbeknownst to you, Melissa finds herself in the same situation as you while everyone is gathering their things to leave.
“That woman was... wow,” a few of the other teachers say, and Melissa hears. She takes a deep breath. They’re allowed to say you’re pretty- they don’t know you two are dating. They start to take it to the next degree, and the redhead’s face is almost as red as her hair. Still, she tries not to overreact. She promised you she wouldn’t be the reason Abbott burnt to the ground. And then one of the fifth grade teachers says something so filthy about you that-
“Barb! Lemme go!” Melissa tries to fight her way out of her best friend’s arms, and Gregory and Ava are also quick to hold your girlfriend back. “He’s gotta know he doesn’t got any reason to talk about a woman like that! Much less, my woman!”
She doesn’t even realize what she’s said- she has no idea that she’s admitted to dating you. But everyone else heard her. They all freeze, all except Barb. Barb continues to try to hold Melissa back.
“Woah!” the fifth grade teacher surrenders. He puts his hands up, terrified of the redhead right now. “She’s your girlfriend?”
“She is, and you don’t get to think about her that way, much less speak about her like that,” Melissa grits out. “You even think about her again, and I swear to God, my foot will be so far up your-”
“Melissa!” the kindergarten teacher scolds.
She fixes her shirt as she huffs and pulls away. She storms out of the room, only to be followed by her usual crew.
“So... you’re dating the firechief?” Gregory asks as they exit the building. At Melissa’s nod, he says quietly, “That’s pretty cool. No wonder you know so much about the trucks.”
“Nah, I knew all that before I met Y/N. She just happened to be a firefighter when we met. Been promoted since, obviously.”
“That’s really nice, Melissa!” Janine grins. “So, when do we get to meet her?”
“Y’already met her,” the second grade teacher rolls her eyes and starts to head for her car.
“No, but like... really meet her?”
“We’re busy that day,” Melissa tells Janine. 
“I- I didn’t even give you a day,” the younger teacher looks hurt. 
“Regardless,” the redhead sighs. “She’s pretty busy. I’ll talk to her tonight when she gets home and see what we can-”
“You two live together?!” Jacob exclaims. 
“Have been,” your girlfriend snorts. “It ain’t news.”
“This is news to us though, Melissa!” Barbara chides her friend. “Even I didn’t know about Y/N! You pulled a Jacob on us!”
“Like I told you before, Barb, youse never asked. I’ll talk to her tonight and see if there’s a day we can have you all over, okay? Ya happy?”
“Delighted,” the kindergarten teacher smiles. “Alright, I have to get home to Gerald, but I will see all of you tomorrow.”
The rest of your day is rather uneventful, and the end of your shift couldn’t come soon enough. You know Melissa was all worked up seeing you in your uniform and having to be a hardass- something entirely different from what she sees at home. 
“Alright boys, I’m heading out for the day,” you tell your subordinates. “Don’t do anything where I would need to be called back in.”
As you’re just about to close the door, one of the men calls your name out. “Don’t forget to ask your woman if she’ll make us her ziti.”
When you walk into your house, Melissa is curled up on the couch, a glass of wine in hand. Her glasses are on the tip of her nose as she grades some of their writing.
“Hey, babe,” you smile as you make your way over, leaning down to kiss her. She tastes like wine, and it makes your head spin.
“Hey, yourself,” she says as her attention is back on her papers. Although she has changed her position so you can sit with her. “Your food is in the microwave, and your glass of wine is in the fridge.”
“Thanks,” you grin tiredly as you head to grab your food and drink. By the time you settle on the couch with Melissa, she’s already put her papers away.
“You didn’t have to put those away,” you tell her as you dig in. Funnily enough, you’re eating ziti tonight.
“I can grade during my prep tomorrow,” the teacher waves you off. “I just wanna look at you right now. Talk to you.”
Your heart practically melts. “Well, I pretty much know how your day went,” you tease her. “Harassed the firefighters all day to play on their truck. Anything interesting happen after I left? Is Barb okay?”
“Barb is fine,” Melissa assures you. She almost tells you that she told her coworkers about the two of you. But she doesn’t. “Did anything else happen after you left today?”
“Nothin that I had to go out for,” you tell her. “Although, the boys and I did have a pretty serious chat today.”
“Oh?” You can see her interest is piqued. “About new equipment?”
“About how they needed to stop thirsting over my girlfriend,” you say smugly. 
Her eyebrows shoot up. “Oh?” she breaks out into a grin. “I still got it.”
“You do,” you chuckle quietly as you lean into her. “And after I made it very clear that you were mine, and I’d have their asses if they made another vulgar comment about you... Jake, one of the newer kids, very sweetly asked if you could consider making another tray of ziti for them. I guess that reminded them all how much they loved your ziti because Vince mentioned it again on my way out.”
“Just take some of the leftovers in with you tomorrow,” your girlfriend laughs. “I’ll make another tray over the weekend too.”
“They’re all gonna be trying to steal you from me even more now,” you playfully pout. 
“‘N I’ll tell ‘em I only got eyes for my girl,” Melissa says sweetly as she presses a kiss to your temple. “For the fire chief. That I don’t go for the regular firefighters.”
“Should I remind you we started dating when I was just a ‘regular firefighter’?”
“But now you’re a firechief, and I won’t settle for less,” she grins. Then she gets the courage to tell you what she wanted to tell you earlier. “I guess we had a pretty similar conversation with our coworkers today about each other.”
You furrow your brows.
“One of the fifth grade teachers saw you today and was saying the filthiest things about what he would do to you if he could, and I almost lit his car on fire,” Melissa tells you.
“I told you I don’t want you committing arson for me,” you tease her. 
“Barb held me back, and I told the guy, I says, ‘you don’t get to think about her that way, much less speak about her like that,’ and then I told him if he did, my foot would be so far up his-” the redhead shakes her head. “That’s besides the point.”
You roll your eyes fondly. Of course she threatened the guy. “So everyone knows now.”
“Janine is already asking when they get to meet you,” Melissa sighs dramatically. “I told them we would find a day, but I also told her we’re always busy, so there’s really no pressure, hon.”
“I think it might be interesting to finally meet all of these people I’ve heard so much about,” you tell her. “We could have them over for a barbecue on Saturday?”
“That’s so soon though,” she grumbles. “And I just told you I would make a tray of ziti this weekend for your guys.”
“I think it would be nice, babe,” you try to convince her. “You can make the ziti Sunday, and- hopefully- it’s too last minute for some of them, so you’ll just end up with me and Barb anyway.”
“Okay, okay,” she says after a few beats. “I’ll tell ‘em tomorrow at lunch.”
Of course, they all show up to your house on Saturday. Of course they do. They’re thrilled to meet the woman who finally took Melissa Schemmenti off the market. 
Next
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brucewaynehater101 · 29 days ago
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I have a really soft and cute au for Lesbian Janet that could work in any universe but I think works best in the Young Justice TV Show Universe.
See, everyone gets really confused when Tim talks about his Mom, sometimes referring to her as Mama. Tim thinks that using two different titles like that should make it Obvious that he has Two Moms but well. The Bats may be Super Geniuses but they are still Idiots. Tim is also an absolute Mama's Boy with Both his Moms. He loves them both So Much.
Oh, where is Jack you ask? He doesn't actually exist. He's the fake name and personality that Tim's Mama came up with and used Magic to disguise as so they could get Legally Married For Tax Benifits. Also to get his Mama a legal identity. Why would she need one of those? Well... as was mentioned, Tim's Mama has Magic with a Captial M. This by extension means Tim is Magic With A Capital M as well. Totally has nothing to do with Janet and his Mama sculpting him from clay and breathing life into him. Woes of pregnancy who? Not Janet that's for sure.
Also Tim does Not tell anyone that he has Magic and he doesn't show it off. The only reason the Bats found out about it is because Tim came to a meeting with Bruce and Diana went "you. Your Magic is Familure but I don't know from where." And Tim was sweating while saying, "Magic? What magic??" And after getting questioned by Diana and Bruce he Caves and tells them a half truth, "fine. I was made from Clay, like you. My Mom didn't want to go through the struggles of Childbirth but still wanted a child. Instead of adopting like any sane and rational person, she made a deal with a God or Godess. I don't know all the details but she owed them something in exchange for Me. I do know the debt has been paid already though."
The debt was simply a tea spoon of blood for the ritual and A Kiss. Janet over paid the second part by a lot.
As for how Janet met and wooed A Goddess? Well, she was on a dig in Greece when her boat she was using to get to another island was caught in a storm and washed up on a different island. The Goddess was expecting violence or anger at being stranded, perhaps even Sorrow. But no, Janet took one look at the Temple in the distance and was pushing past her saying she needed to get to the Temple because it's clearly in *amazing* condition and could bring So Many insights into Ancient Greek culture and building practice. For the first time in decades, as this Random Woman ran her hand along a pillar and started rambling about the design and what the type of collums were called, Circe felt herself blushing.
CIRCE?!?!?
FUCK YEAH.
Anyways, this is absolutely adorable. Fuck. I would love an entire fic of Janet. Here's a general plot line:
Janet hasn't ever really been interested in romance. She's tried dating a few guys in high school for appearance sake, but she usually broke the relationship off when they became too affectionate.
This is when others started referring to her as "cold." She wasn't, but few people got close enough to her to listen to her rambles about ancient civilizations, archeology, and sociality impacts of culture. She enjoyed other stuff, but nothing quite lit her up like those topics did.
In college, she did find and make a few friends with similar interests. This is where she figured out she was into women and not men. The relationships lasted longer, but she was single by the time she graduated with her bachelor's.
Her master's ends up as some sort of work study where she travels the world. She's more invested in her studies and work than relationships at this point. She enjoys learning about people's lives and cultures but doesn't seek out more than friendship.
I'm not sure if Janet has already or is working on her doctorate by the time she ends up lost on an island (or really how archeology even pays bills).
When she arrives on the island, there's a beautiful woman there as well. Janet notices this, but doesn't give a flying fuck in comparison to the architecture.
And Circe? Finds herself amused and confused by this woman who, although is into women, doesn't care about Circe's looks. Janet just keeps asking questions about Circe's life, the temple, the plants, the culture, etc. It becomes endearing watching her work late into the night with her research.
Janet is so enthralled in all that is going on that she doesn't notice Circe's continuous flirting. It's so fucking frustrating for Circe, but makes her unbearably fond as well. Janet starts to consider this drop dead gorgeous woman a close friend of hers as they "work" late into the chatting about ancient Greece, their past experiences, and their lives. Janet, who has some experience with romance but not much, even flirts back. After all, women call each other beautiful all the time and hold hands and shit. Surely Janet can platonically cuddle with her friend while Circe compares Janet's eyes to the night sky.
It's only when Janet is ready to leave that she realizes that she's willing to give up everything she's worked for, all of her findings and education, to have more time with Circe. Janet is in love with her best friend.
Also, Circe is able to get a fake ID as "Jack" due to magic and Janet's connections
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snotbuggle · 8 months ago
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Omega when she gets to jail and realizes that she now has to big sister four other children. One of which is nowhere near her age.
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Going to try and condense some more serious thoughts about these episodes down below so I can avoid spoiling someone as much as possible and not post a dozen times. I don’t want to miss tag any one of those.
Jex/Jek?? I can’t completely remember his name, but the mirialan kid is for sure not going to trust her at all. Can’t say much for the pantoran kid since they haven’t shown much of them so far, but Eva is going to love her.
I think the mirialan kid is definitely going to be skeptical of Omega’s prior knowledge of the facility, Emerie, and why they’re there. Although he might overlook these things hanging on her promise that her brothers will get her, and in turn them, out of there. I can’t help but wonder what Omega and the others will think after about a week and there still not being a rescue. (These two are assuming that she will be placed with the other force sensitive children. Although she may be moved since her blood actually works for project Necromancer)
Crosshair is definitely going to hear it from Hunter. ESPECIALLY after he threw Hunter’s past failure to keep her out of Tantiss in his face. What I think will weigh on his conscience more though is the fact he thinks she’ll be alone this time. In a way she definitely will, but I have no doubt that he realizes he was probably the highlight of her day. He was probably the one thing that kept her hopeful even if he tried to talk down on her and get her to leave. Yes, she had hope that Hunter and Wrecker would find her, but she also needed someone there with her. A familiar face and not someone who just revealed they were your sister out of the blue. Her situation has changed, but Crosshair doesn’t know that. The Crosshair guilt is going to be so real in these last episodes.
Switching gears, CX agents are always a cool and interesting topic for me. While the identity of CX-2 isn’t usually as engaging, I have to say that I’ve drifted from the standpoint of “there’s no way that’s Tech” to “it’s a possibility” over the course of the last two episodes. I’ve seen some fun ideas for who it is otherwise. Personally, I think that they’re probably just another copy paste man with no autonomy anymore.
ANYHOW! I haven’t seen anyone talk about it much, but the scene with Hemlock reviewing the CX agent data and the capsule has me thinking a little harder on their creation/conditioning. The way Hemlock talks about the other operatives as well. “The others aren’t ready to join you” (paraphrasing) seems to show that after the mental conditioning through obviously brutal means, it takes a load of time to physically condition the agents. Seeing as CX-1 was most likely initiated around the same time as Crosshair (I choose to believe that they were near each other’s tables which is why they’re familiar), that took around five months to half a year. In that time span there had to be a lot of soldiers who Hemlock saw fit to be “reprogrammed” but we see very few operatives throughout. This means that if they make it out of mental conditioning, physical conditioning is most likely very dangerous and often times fatal. I’d like to draw attention to the capsules as a part of that physical conditioning. There were several capsules that Hemlock was observing, along with the foggy one that is most likely that new Huyang-lookin-ass operative. If these capsules are the final stage of physical conditioning, it adds meaning to CX-2’s first line, “Why have I been activated?” (Once again paraphrasing). Although the capsules could be for something else entirely.
Also a bit of a gripe, why in the world do you need a new secret-secret operative, Hemlock? You have the commandos, and then the first X troopers, now the CX’s, and what? You wanted a new one? I can’t tell if this man is an overachiever or just way too absorbed into the advanced trooper rabbit hole. Also for you Tech theorists, it’s kinda suspicious that he makes a new version of agents isn’t it? Almost like there’s something…deviant about him?
Completely side tracking here, I really like Phee’s awareness in the station. Yeah she didn’t hear the blaring alarm, but she was in a room where it’d be hard to hear anyways. However, when she got back she felt something was off about the ramp. We’ve seen how slick CX-2 is, so her noticing something is up was a nice touch imo. Also was very appreciative of her caution and readiness with her knife. I love when female characters get to be aware of their surroundings and ready to throw hands if things go south.
In conclusion, thank you for listening to my dump-rambling. I’ve been trying to keep my lips shut so I don’t miss tag anything and spoil it for someone (because I know that I’ll forget to tag everything right). I hope Wrecker is okay. And even if I’m not a Tech CX theorist, I have to admit that I’ve been seeing some fairly strong parallels.
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1moreff-creator · 1 month ago
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Corrigendum - Literature Girl Insane Analysis
Updates After CH2 PT2
More than a year ago, the entire DRDT fandom was thrown on its head when the Literature Girl Insane David MV dropped. And with the help of DRDT Tumblr for mystery finding and interpretations, about a year ago I made “A Full Vivisection of the David MV,” a two and a half hour video going over everything I could. While I still think the video mostly holds up even after CH2 PT2, there’s quite a few things that require an update. Let’s go over them, shall we?
(Is this a correct use of the word "corrigendum"? I don't know, but it's close enough for me to use given the connection to the book theme we got going on :v)
As a warning, though, this post will more or less assume that you’ve watched Vivisection, as some sections might be complete gibberish without the context of my previous interpretations of this thing.
Spoilers up to CH2. CW: Suicide, murder, hanging, CH2 execution, gun violence, blood
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I’ll go through the recontextualizations in order of appearance in the MV, though first: 
Footnote 14 Solution, Tally 5 Correction
So these two things aren’t related to Part 2, but instead codes already in LGI. Since Vivisection came out, the footnote 14/Roman numeral I code got solved, and I’ve been informed that the solution for tally 5 I hinted at in the video was, while not wrong in the sense that you could arrive at the code using it, not the actually intended solution. Basically I said to pay attention to line breaks, when you’re actually supposed to ignore them, and that meant that one character had to be ignored when in reality the real solution works perfectly fine without ignoring it. Sorry, the line break thing was just commonly repeated advice given on Tumblr at the time and I don’t know why I never double checked how accurate it was :v
The proper solutions can be found in my Secrets Masterpost, so I won’t repeat them here. The Roman numeral I code, attached to Xander via crosswords, returned “I have always looked up to you,” which is perfectly in line with both the things David states in 2-12 and the conclusions drawn about how he feels towards Xander from the MV. As for tally 5, that will be addressed later. 
Yoidore Shirazu Lyrics
Another thing that happened was the release of the Elliot MV, Yoidore Shirazu. While the MV itself is not particularly for our purposes, I'm bringing it up to double check a thing with the lyrics.
You might remember that a big chunk of Vivisection was informed by "Language Theory," the idea that some lyrics' translations were specifically changed to fit better with David. This was supported by footnote 5, "As the translation has been intentionally botched in many parts, it should not be considered accurate," as well as the fact that Coleena Wu was listed in the credits, meaning her translation was used as a base for the David MV even though there were many differences between the David MV's lyrics and her version.
Thus, when I saw that Yoidore Shirazu credited Magenetra for the English lyrics, I figured I'd check if it happened again. And yes, there are a few lines here and there where the Elliot version is slightly different from the original translation. While I won't get into all of them in this post, a particularly notable change is "my muddy, obstructed and broken vision of the future, it's not half bad" in the original changing to "my muddy, obstructed, broken future, it's not half bad" in the Elliot MV, for example.
What does this tell us about the David MV? Well, I would argue that if dev decided to change a few lyrics in an MV where word placement isn't as important as in LGI, presumably just to make them fit better with Elliot or because dev just prefers certain wording (I don't see any other reasons the translation would be different), then it's very possible that they also consciously changed a few LGI lines to fit better with David. Maybe. In other words, I believe this is an extra argument to the validity of Language Theory, though I could also see it as an argument against ("maybe dev just doesn't care about sticking so close to the translations they use") :v
Now let’s actually go from the start of the MV to the end, shall we?
Color Connection Theory: Orange
In Vivisection, I said (words more words less) that while in a vacuum orange would probably go to Ace, the context of some of the lines seemed to fit Xander better, with the argument that the trailer for the series assigns orange as the color of the first letter of Xander’s name in a hypothetical class trial. The main argument was that Orange “that guy” appeared next to Green “this guy” (Hu/Teruko, leaning Hu) and Black “you” (possibly Mai), and lumping Ace in with characters who seemed much more important than him at the time seemed… strange.
Since then, Ace has gained a notable amount of importance to this particular part of the story, given the whole blackened thing. As a result, I would argue his inclusion as Orange is now more likely than Xander’s. Take a look at the start of the first chorus, for example, and you’ll see that putting Xander as red (which would be redundant if he’s also orange) makes for a nice, neat reading in the context of this trial.
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[Literature Girl Insane] Even if you cry, make noise, shout, go mad the world won’t change!
Arei: “Even if you cry about hurting Eden, you’ll still always be a horrible person.”
Hu: “Even if you make noise to make yourself useful, you’re still the same hopeless child who attempted suicide three times.”
Ace: “Even if you shout, you’ll always be a coward.”
Xander: “Even if you go mad, you’ll always be a good person at heart.”
“No matter what, you people (the world) won’t change.”
What a lovely worldview David has! 
There’s also this instance, "let's play!":
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[Literature Girl Insane] With anonymous hopes let's play!
Which makes sense given Ace is “playing the killing game” by… killing in the game. Foreshadowing or am I insane? These are not mutually exclusive. 
Hand Holding
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dev why /affectionate
So, yeah. Arei holds David’s hand the same way Ideal Country Woman does. At least we’ve got near 100% confirmation that the weird line of white pixels is not a glove or anything, but rather a bend of the wrist as expected. 
Now we have to ask what Arei’s connection to this mess is. Thankfully, I can at least draw a connection between Arei and the surrounding context of the scene, so we’re not going in completely blind. As a reminder, here’s the interpretation I arrived at for the “tunnel scene” that directly precedes Miss Hand Holding’s appearance.
[Extract from Vivisection] David gives Xander the order to "escape the tunnel," so open himself up to love others. However, "but," loving David is a bad idea, because he's a monster who's better off dead. His opinion, right? So he asks himself, where should Xander escape? "Where to?" In other words, who should Xander like and be friends with?
The connection to Arei should be more or less clear, provided you replace Xander's name with her. There’s two ways to take it. Arei opened herself up to David, “escaped the tunnel on his direction” per say. And given what happened directly after, you could say it led to a “disastrous scene.” Alternatively, if David genuinely wanted to accept Arei’s proposal to be “less shitty together,” if he “escaped the tunnel in Arei’s direction,” that too could be considered a “disastrous scene” because Arei died. That one’s admittedly a pretty big if, butconsidering some of the stuff David says…
David [2-10]: Unless, of course, you were Arei. That girl wanted desperately to prove herself as a "friend" to Eden. And yet she completely lacked any experience with what "friends" were actually like. [...] What could she know about "friendship," after all? Someone like her, who had not once experienced kindness in her entire life up until now? [...] [Breaking down] It's... It's so... Ahaha. It's just so foolish. For someone to take advantage of Arei like that... It's absolutely unforgivable. All she wanted was to change. What a reprehensible person this killer is. I look forward to seeing their painful execution.
Yeah he might have cared. 
So, okay, Arei can be connected to the surrounding context so this isn’t completely out of left field, but we still have the possibility of a further connection to the Mystery Girl. As you might recall, this girl is either Diana Chiem (based on certain similarities with David and because revealing Ms Naegi like this would be weird) or Ms Naegi (because Diana isn’t in the Cast List, while Naegi is). I don’t see any immediate connections to Naegi, so we’re left with Diana, who also has little connection.
Of course, the number one takeaway is that Arei reminds David of Diana (or Ms Naegi) in some way, so we can infer Mystery Girl might have supported David despite knowing about his manipulative nature, especially possible since she's positioned in the MV in a way where she's the "(so-called) ideal country." I'm about to ramble a whole lot more about other possibilities, but this is probably what we're meant to get from this.
If we’re allowing a small amount of unhingedness, another connection that could be drawn is between Arei’s family situation and David’s. Arei also had sisters, but they treated her horribly until Arei ruined their lives. Translated to Diana, this could mean that David treated her badly, that she did something to harm him, or both. If their relationship turned bad during Hope’s Peak time, it could explain why Footnote David, presumed to be David before losing his memories, claims she doesn’t exist, when Killing Game David speaks about her openly. Did he try to cut ties with her or something, and tries to pretend she doesn’t exist? Again, unhinged and probably not what the takeaway is meant to be, but we know less than zero about Diana, so it's not impossible.
Alternatively, though, it's worth noting that Mystery Girl and Arei tilt their heads in opposite directions, which could symbolize they're opposites in a way. Taken with the previous interpretations, this could mean either Mystery Girl supported David without knowing about his motive secret (opposite of interpretation 1), or that Arei's family situation is opposite Diana's, aka David had a good relationship with his sister (opposite of interpretation 2).
But speaking of insane, would you believe me if I told you that this visual similarity could, alternatively, be evidence for literally the most unhinged theory in the entire Vivisection? That is, the ridiculous deduction which is arrived at by analyzing the objects in the “suspicious gaps” attached to footnote 11, “I admit to lying. There is no one named OOOOO OOOOO. I am, and always have been, an only child," as well as the Catch-22 quote that comes directly after. Full explanation in Vivisection, but here’s the theory. 
[Extract from Vivisection]  So, first, I think the footnote is a double lie. David's lying about lying. He does actually have a sister but, for some reason, he's trying to deny it. He's pulling an Arturo: something happened with his sister, and he's trying to distance himself from it. That's where the snake with the blood and the safe come in, with the rope possibly implying a suicide. Remember the family history of depression? [...] So, it's possible Diana died. [...] It's also possible that whatever happened to Diana would have been hinted at in David's motive video. [...] Yeah, that's my explanation for the TV. But, why would this bad thing which happened to Diana be in David's motive video? That would imply David doesn't remember it. That's what the Snowden line could mean. [...]
Yeah remember that insane thing? Well, Arei died by hanging, so it’s possible Diana also died by hanging, aka suicide. This connection doesn’t make the theory any less unhinged, but it’s there. 
I hate the things I love, and I love the things I hate
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As a refresher, this screen is about Xander, indicated mainly by the references to electrocution literally framing the scene. Nothing’s actually changed here, mind you, I just wanted to point out that it’s interesting that so far, we’ve only seen David talk about Xander with love, and we haven’t really seen the whole “I hate” part yet. Curious to see how that will develop later.
suspicious gaps
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Still zero clue, I’m just putting it here because it’s still killing me.
V. Right now, why do you go insane? [Ace's numeral]
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We should’ve known, guys… Ace’s numeral is literally right next to Arei’s (IV), not just in song position, but numerically. Incidentally, that means both killers so far have been in multiples of five (Min with X, Ace with V), so, uh, Whit (XV), anything you wanna tell us about CH3?
(I don’t think he’ll be the CH3 killer I’m just being silly :p)
Anyways, the big update here is related to the background text, “a cat has 9 additional lives.” This was already pointed out by treescanfly, and that is that Thanatophobia, Ace’s execution, featured 9 different execution methods (scythe - illness - fire - falling - murder - drowning - lightning - firing squad (execution)). Looks like horseboy really was a catboy all along!
XIII. or [not to be?] [Teruko's numeral]
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The interpretation of the quote itself, that it’s a reference to Teruko’s suicidal tendencies, hasn’t changed. It’s only gotten more explicit.
Teruko [2-16]: Killed? I doubt it. As if something so kind could happen to me.
:(
Not much else here, though it seems Teruko might start rejecting the suffering associated with being the Omelas child given her talk with DefaultTV, so that’s fun.
Footnote 6, “[Prayer]”
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So what I’m about to say is technically a connection that existed since LGI’s realease, but was just a bit too insane for me to even think about back then. 
Basically, you know how Mai is referred to as a “God” in this video, because of her numeral and the arrow? Well… what if that’s connected to this footnote? And, I don’t know, Min is praying to Mai?
Again, unhinged even for my standards, but with the confirmation that XF-Ture Tech is in some form behind the killing game… anything that puts Min in a weirdly plot relevant position (such as inexplicably having a Mai connection beyond what we saw in Bonus Episode 1) should be at least written down for posterity, if nothing else. 
That's my way of saying- Please write about Min, guys. I miss her :(
Footnote 12
“Majority rule” is known to be the fairest method of making decisions for a group. That's why murderers never complained when we voted for them to die.
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In Vivisection, I primarily argued the meaning of this footnote through the lens that David may have genuinely believed he had driven Arei to suicide, and thus believed he was the blackened. This turned out to be horribly wrong, so we course correct. 
Instead, this simply seems to be what David was hoping would happen when he pulled out the magical girl transformation, albeit stylized with an impossible 16 people vote. The screen that flashes after just seems to reflect what David thinks would actually happen if a blackened won, or just what will happen by the end of the killing game no matter what: “Everyone will be executed.” That’s based on this line:
David [2-12]: 15 lives. Some of them are very dear to you. And your own life as well. Is there anything at all that could be more important to you than those 16 human lives?
Where David talks about sacrificing the full 16 lives of the participants, seemingly without taking into account that the blackened wouldn’t actually die in his plan. Because of that, it’s inferred that David doesn’t actually think the blackened would survive even if they won the trial. 
Other than that, the footnote seems to just be a direct reference to what Teruko says in the trial:
Teruko [2-15]: We determine who lives and who dies by a majority vote. In other words, the opinion of everyone who *isn't* you.
Which, uh... makes things easier, so I'm not gonna read into it much further :v
“What is the most important thing?” / Mistaken alphabet
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Still no idea what these two things are about, that’s why I’m bringing them up :v
Original
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[Extract from Vivisection] So, what I think is the best idea is that all the characters [referring to Color Theory] got the word. [...] I think it makes more sense to relate them to the meaning of "original style" under my interpretation, where "original style" means a change of heart.
The interpretation from Vivisection seems to hold strong, as MonoTV did actually have a “change of heart” of sorts, albeit brief. Hey we take the Ws where we can get them >:D
Two Eyed Xander
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The theory discussed in Vivisection that David might hold memories from Hope’s Peak times was seemingly debunked by a tweet from the dev, even if the thread referenced in the link was later deleted. I did say in Vivisection that I didn’t believe the theory even if it was cool, so… we’re chilling. 
Of course, though, we did get confirmation that David knew about Xander before Hope's Peak, so the appearance of Xander with two eyes was meaningful! Cool!
Correct/Incorrect (Tally 5)
This is going to discuss the unlisted video linked in the footnotes of Vivisection, which I am well aware most of you probably didn’t watch given the view count. In any case, the thing I said there, which I also said in my Mai post, was that tally 5 could imply David had been involved in the weird revolution against Hope’s Peak that Xander and Mai had going on. While this is still certainly possible, given what was said in 2-12, it seems more plausible that tally 5 actually references David taking on Xander’s dream during the killing game.
David [2-12]: I don't care how low I'll sink, or how despicable I'll have to become. I'll do anything to carry on Xander's ideals by ending this killing game, even if it means I have to dirty my hands.
Yeah, the dream of killing everyone, that one. I say this not only because we know David “threw away his humanity” for it, but also because the image itself shows David holding Xander’s jacket, which would imply this is being said after Xander’s death. Thus, during the killing game. 
Numeral IX - Look, aside from that, give me the usual medicine [Levi's numeral]
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Well, he sure needs medicine alright! Yeah that’s the best answer I currently have about what in the hell this numeral means, so we’re going with this. 
That said, points to Vivisection me, because the “Levi is Jupiter protecting Earth from asteroids” interpretation ended up being pretty solid. 
Clock Fork
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You know, the theory that Eden was the one to rip out Xander’s eye based on the clock in LGI existed before I made Vivisection, I just… didn’t invlude it. The one unhinged theory I don’t mention ends up being true, huh? Well, there’s that. Not much else to say, if you're deep into DRDT lore you already know the implications of a bloody fork.
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-
And… that’s about that! Although I had quite a few comments to make and things to add, actual corrections were few and far between, which I’m happy about! Mind you, there's probably a few Vivisection statements here and there I'm forgetting about, but still. Hope you enjoyed this little corrigendum, and if you made it this far, you deserve your own Jupiter-Levi to defend you in your time of need! See you later!
116 notes · View notes
fanfictionalraven · 8 months ago
Text
Right Where You Left Me
Title: Right Where You Left Me
Summary: The reader, a waitress at the local diner, has become good friends with Dean. What happens when he disappears without a trace?
Characters: Reader, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Mary Winchester, Castiel
Word Count: 7,309
Warnings: Canon typical violence and peril
Author's Note: This story takes place through the events of the second half of season 12, starting with episode 9 "First Blood". It's also the first story I've actually written and published in nearly 6 years, so grant me a little grace please. Enjoy!!
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“Ma’am? Ma’am?” A voice says. You snap from your thoughts and look at the people sitting at the table in front of you. You’d gotten distracted by the bell at the door, a new customer coming in. Not the one you were looking for though. Putting on your best smile, you shake your head slightly. 
“I’m so sorry. Where were we?” You ask, glancing at the notepad in your hand.
“We were trying to ask you about the pie of the day,” the woman says. You nod and try not to sigh.
“Cherry,” you tell her. Dean’s favorite. They order two slices which you deliver to them quickly before going into the kitchen. “Stew, I’m taking a 10,” you announce to the cook. He waves a hand at you and glances at the clock.
“Make it 5,” he shouts as you slip out the back door. Leaning against the wall with a sigh, you slip the brace off of your wrist and roll the sore joint slowly, wincing. 
“This job,” you mumble before pulling your phone from your apron. Going into your recent calls, you hit the name at the top. Dean. He wasn’t going to answer. He hadn’t in weeks after all, calls or texts. It rings…and rings…and rings. Just as you’re about to give up, the final ring is cut off.
“Hello?” A woman’s voice asks, curiously. Confusion and a million unpleasant thoughts sweep over you in an instant.
“I’m sorry. I was trying to reach Dean,” you say.
“This is his phone. At least, I think it is…who is this?” She asks. You sigh and run a hand over your face.
“My name’s Y/N. I…I work at a diner and Dean’s one of my regulars. I haven’t seen him in a while and…I was worried,” you tell her. You can hear the confusion in her voice when she responds.
“A waitress who has her customer’s numbers and calls to check up on them?” She asks.
“No. Well…yes, but…Dean’s more than just a customer,” you say.
“What exactly is Dean then?” She asks, a slight edge to her voice. What is Dean? That was the very question you’d spent countless nights asking yourself.
When Dean had first wandered into the diner and sat in your section, he was just another tip. Sure, the two of you had flirted but, to be honest, you flirted with most of your customers. You had bills to pay after all. He came back the very next night, claiming the pie had just been too good. On his fifth visit to the diner, he wandered in just as you clocked out and invited you to join him. You sat in that booth across from him for hours, laughing and talking. At the end of his seventh trip, you slipped your phone number to him on the back of his bill. He’d called you before his car was even out of the parking lot.
That was nearly a year ago and the two of you talked and texted regularly ever since. Sure, he’d go silent for a little while but then he’d saunter into the diner, give you a crooked smile, and ask for the pie of the day. Throughout that year, the two of you flirted, laughed, and teased each other.  There had been a few occasions when he’d catch you as you were leaving, place a to-go order, and then you’d ride in his car out to some deserted spot to talk and eat. You’d gotten to know each other intimately. In an emotional sense that is. Dean always kept you at arm’s length. He’d never asked you on a real date. Your coworkers insisted he was probably married and just stringing you along. And now some strange woman was answering his phone and…
“Y/N?” The woman on the line says.
“Sorry. A friend. Dean’s…a really good friend,” you tell her. “Can I ask who you are?”
“I’m Mary,” she starts and you immediately let out a heavy sigh.
“His mother. Of course,” you breathe with relief.
“Yes,” she says, slightly surprised.
“He’s talked about you a lot. Where is Dean?” You ask. Now, it was Mary’s turn to sigh.
“We don’t know,” she tells you.
“What?” You ask. “It’s his job, isn’t it?” You didn’t know exactly what Dean did but he’d come into the diner beaten and bruised on a few occasions.
“Well…yes,” she says.
“Have you called the police?”
“Y/N, break’s over,” Stew calls from the back door.
“Give me a minute!!” You yell to him. He grumbles and slams the door shut. “You have called the police, right, Mary?”
“That’s not exactly an option,” she says, slowly.
“Well…what about Sam? Or…or Cas?” You ask. There’s the briefest of pauses.
“I’m…I’m here with Mary,” a second voice says.
“And Sam was with Dean,” Mary adds. Cas was there as well, listening to your conversation. You frown and pinch the bridge of your nose, trying to think.
“I want to help,” you tell them.
“I’m sorry, Y/N but…we don’t even know you,” she says.
“Well, then, come meet me. I get off at 8:00,” you say before giving her the address for the diner. “If you don’t show up, I’ll call the police and report them missing myself.”
“We’ll be there,” Mary says before disconnecting the line. You slip the phone back into your apron pocket and run your hands over your face. Sliding the brace back onto your wrist, you head back into the diner.
The rest of your shift drags on slowly. You don’t make nearly as much as you could have on tips, your normal perky personality absent. At 8:15, you finally manage to clock out, throwing your apron into the dirty linens bag. You rush out the front door and look around, phone in hand. The front doors of an unfamiliar car open at the same time. Mary, you recognize her from the old pictures Dean had shown you, gets out of the driver’s side, and the man you assume to be Cas gets out as well.
“Y/N?” Mary asks, watching you. You nod and rush over to the two of them.
“While I wish it was under different circumstances, it’s nice to finally meet you both,” you tell them, holding a hand out. Mary gives you a quick once over before placing her hand in yours.
“I wish I could say the same but…”
“Dean never mentioned me,” you say. It wasn’t a question but a statement of fact. You’d often wondered and now you knew for sure. You were a secret.
“So, what exactly do you know about their work?” Mary asks. You frown and shrug.
“Not much. I figure…best case, CIA…worst case, I dunno…the mafia,” you say, more than a little embarrassed. Mary smiles a little and looks down at the ground.
“Not exactly. It’s a bit more freelance than that,” she says.
“Like a bounty hunter?” You ask. Mary shakes her head, looking around.
“I’d rather not discuss it here. Would you be willing to go back to the bun…where the boys live and talk there?” She asks. 
“Of course,” you agree, immediately.
***
Never get in the car with strangers. The age old advice rang through your ears as you rode in the back seat to wherever Mary and Cas were taking you. Of course, these two weren’t exactly strangers. They were at least Dean’s mother and best friend. You truly felt like you actually knew them with how much he’d talked about them.
Mary continues to drive as you watch the cityscape disappear. It isn’t too long before she’s pulling onto a desolate looking road. The road leads into a dark tunnel, only lit by the headlights of Mary’s car. Your eyes have to readjust when she pulls into a much more brightly lit area. Looking around, you find a room that appears to be a garage holding several very old cars. This much at least screamed Dean, relaxing you a little.
“You said they live here?” You ask, trying to wrap your mind around that statement.
“Yes. It’s an old bunker. Used to be home to a secret society, the Men of Letters,” she tells you. You nod and try to keep your face in check. You can feel her watching you in the rearview mirror.
“Are they in this secret society then? You ask as she parks the car.
“No,” she answers. “It died out in America decades ago. There is still an active branch in London though.”
“Douchebags,” Cas mutters. You both look at him and he glances between the two of you. “That’s what Dean calls them.” You let out a small laugh as the three of you get out of the car. Mary leads the way through the bunker quietly. You follow, looking around and trying to take in as much as you can. She leads the two of you into what you assume is a library given the shelves of books all along the walls.
“You drink?” She asks, holding up a bottle of brown liquid. You nod as you take a seat at the table. Admittedly, you were more of a wine drinker but you felt the impending conversation would require something stronger. Mary pours two glasses and sets one in front of you before walking around to the other side of the table. She takes the seat opposite you and looks at the glass, swirling it slightly. “You sure about this, Y/N? Once you know the truth, leaving it behind can be pretty difficult.”
“Please,” is all you manage to say. She nods and throws her drink back quickly.
“Alright,” she starts. “I come from a long line of hunters. Not the kind you’re thinking of. My family hunted monsters. Ghosts, demons, witches, vampires.” You strive to keep your face in check as you take a slow drink. This was not what you were expecting at all.  “When I was 19, dating John, the boys’ father, a demon killed him and my parents. He offered me a deal. He would bring John back and we could live a normal life, as long as I gave him permission to enter my home in 10 years. I was suddenly alone and holding the dead body of the love of my life. I agreed. Ten years later, he entered my home and killed me. John took the boys on the road and they became hunters as well.”
Mary stops as you stand slowly and make your way over to the bottle she had used earlier. With shaking hands, you refill your glass before downing it quickly. This was insane. Mary was insane. There was no way this was real.
“Mary…I…you really expect me to believe all this?” You ask, looking back at her now. She shrugs slightly and looks at Cas. You’d forgotten he was even there. He’d been leaning against a bookshelf behind her, watching you. You look at him as he starts to make his way around the table towards you.
Panic quickly rises in your throat and you have to remind yourself that these are Dean’s people. At least…you’re fairly certain they are. You’d never seen pictures of Cas and the only ones you had seen of Mary were from when Dean was just a child. Now, this strange woman was trying to convince you that monsters were real and your friend hunted them for a living. Cas stops next to you and looks down at your hand.
“Why are you wearing that brace?” He asks. You blink, surprised. You’d half expected him to knock you unconscious.
“I, ummm…” You hold it up and shake your head. “Carpal Tunnel from work.” Cas nods and briefly touches two fingers to your forehead before you can even register the movement.
“You won’t need it anymore,” he says. You stare at him in disbelief before taking the brace off. For the first time in a long time, you don’t feel any pain as you roll your wrist in every direction. You look back up at Cas and then at Mary. She smiles and shrugs.
“Angel,” she says. You know the shock is clear all over your face as Cas helps you back to your seat. The three of you sit in silence for a little while as you process all of this information. You’re grateful for the time they give you.
“You, ummm…” You stop and look at Mary. “You said you died.” She runs a hand across her forehead and looks at you, debating on if you’re prepared for more information. You give her the best reassuring smile you can manage at the moment.
“God’s sister brought me back as a thank you gift to Dean and Sam for helping her reunite with her brother,” she says. You’re absolutely certain your jaw hits the table. 
“Well…that was…nice,” you manage. “And they were on a…a hunt when they disappeared?”
“Lucifer had possessed the president of the United States,” Cas starts. “We were going to exorcise him and return him to his cage in hell.”
“Oh my god,” you mumble, immediately beginning to massage your temples. “This is…this is a lot.”
“Now you know why Dean never told you,” Mary says. You nod, still attempting to rub away the migraine threatening to explode behind your eyes.
“I, ummm…can I take a walk?” You ask. Mary nods, smiling a little. You hoped you were handling this better than she expected. You’re still shaking as you rise from your seat again and make your way down one of the hallways. Your mind thinks back over things Dean had mentioned about his work and, frankly, it lined up. He’d never given you a lot of details but now it was starting to make sense.
You stop in the middle of the hallway and glance around. Your curiosity gets the better of you causing you to push open the door in front of you. It was a bedroom, modestly decorated. You make your way into the room and find a familiar picture sitting on the bedside table. It was the photo Dean had shown you of him and his mother. Glancing around the room, you surmise that it must be his room.
You pull open the drawer of the bedside table and gasp. Inside you find several things, another gun, a handful of credit cards, and fake ID’s. But the most surprising thing was sitting right on top. You gingerly pick up the picture and can’t help but smile. It’s of you, sitting in the front seat of Dean’s car, laughing. You remembered when he’d taken it, one of the many nights you’d spent talking. You didn’t realize he’d had it printed and kept it so close. Maybe you were more than just a secret.
“Y/N?” Mary asks from the doorway. You look up at her and she smiles. “I was getting ready to head out when you called, a vampire thing in Missouri. Cas said he’d take you back.”
“Thank you for being honest with me,” you tell her. She nods once and leaves you alone.
The next few days pass relatively uneventfully. You call Stew and make up a story about a death in the family out of state, telling him you’ll need a week or two off. He reluctantly agrees. You stay at the bunker with Cas after that. Your days are spent diving into the lore books in the old bunker, learning anything and everything you can. Cas teaches you how to do “research”, showing you how to tell the difference between normal weird and supernatural weird. He shows you one of the spare bedrooms but you end up sleeping in Dean’s room instead. 
The two of you are making your way to the library when you hear Cas’s phone ringing. He rushes ahead to answer it and you go over to a new shelf to find something else to study.
“What?” He answers the phone. “Dean?” The book you’d picked out slips from your hand and you rush to his side. “What, what happened? Wh-where are you?” You stare at him, tears stinging your eyes. He grabs a pen and pad off the table and quickly jots down a note. Rocky Mountain National Park. State Route 34. “Yes. – Wait, where? – Wait, what does that…” Cas sighs and sets the phone down, frowning.
“What did he say?? Are they okay??” You ask. He glances at you and shrugs.
“He sounded rushed. Like they were being chased,” he says. You nod and pick up the notepad, trying to hide the rush of emotions you were feeling.
“We’ve got to call Mary. Meet up with her and get to Colorado,” you tell him. He looks at you quickly and frowns.
“No, Y/N. It’s too dangerous for you to come along,” he says, taking the notepad. You shake your head, tears falling freely as you look up at the angel.
“Cas, please,” you beg. His resolve breaks instantly and he sighs, picking his phone back up.
“Dean would not approve,” he mumbles before calling Mary.
The two of you pull into a parking lot several hours later. Mary’s car is already sitting, waiting. She gets out and clenches her jaw when she sees you rise from the passenger side of Cas’s car.
“You got here quickly,” Cas remarks. Mary nods, eyes fixed on you.
“Yep. What the hell is she doing here??” She asks. Cas sighs and looks over at you.
“Mary, please. I won’t get in the way, I swear,” you tell her. Frowning, she shakes her head, her hands coming to rest on your shoulders.
“Y/N, it’s not about you being in the way. We have no idea what we’re walking into. I’m more worried about you getting hurt and what that would do to Dean,” she says. Swallowing hard, you set your jaw. Mary wasn’t going to see you cry too.
“Please. I have to be there. I need to see him with my own eyes,” you plead. She watches you for a moment, debating internally.
“Dean’s gonna kill us,” she says before turning to Cas. “We may want backup.”
“Crowley and Rowena?” He asks. She scoffs and you glance between them.
“The King of Hell and his mother, the witch?” She asks. You frown and shake your head.
“I don’t like the sound of that,” you comment. Mary smiles a little and looks at Cas.
“I hope we can do better than them.”
“I may have an idea,” he says. Mary nods and makes for the driver’s side of her own car.
“Good. Seat belts on. I drive fast,” she tells the two of you as you load into the car as well.
The British Men of Letters. That was Cas’s idea. Mary almost immediately pulls out, supposing “the demon and his mommy” don’t sound so bad anymore. You hang back, watching the situation unfold. The two Brits, Mick and Ketch from what you gather, offer their services seemingly free of charge. They make a few phone calls, getting access to a satellite of the area Dean had mentioned. Mary and Cas are able to deduce the direction they’re headed and a good spot to meet them.
The two cars move to the new location and you all unload once again. You look up at the night sky and think about the last night you’d spend with Dean. He’d picked you up from the diner at closing time and drove you out of town to a remote location. You’d both laid on the hood of the car, splitting the last of the pie of the day.
“Y/N,” Mary says, pulling you from your thoughts. You turn to face her and immediately launch into pleading again.
“Mary, please. I don’t want to wait here while you two go on…”
“Stop,” she says, holding her hand up. “That’s not what I was going to say. Dean’s already gonna be pissed we brought you. He’d kill us both if we left you with those two. Just stay close to us and if something goes wrong, run back here.” You manage a relieved smile and follow her and Cas further up into the woods.
The three of you come into a small clearing and it isn’t long before there’s a rustling in the brush. Cas and Mary both move into a defensive stance in front of you. You wring your hands as you wait. Cas takes a few steps closer to the noise just as Dean and Sam fall through the bushes. Your heart jumps into your throat at the sight of Dean and you almost break down crying right then.
“Sam, Dean,” Cas says, relieved. You can see the tension immediately leave Mary’s shoulders as she takes in the sight of her boys. Sam rises first and pulls Cas into a tight hug. His eyes land on Mary and he smiles.
“Mom,” he says, letting Cas go. He starts to make his way across the clearing towards her when you register the confusion on his face. Dean finally stands and hugs Cas as well. Sam pulls Mary into a tight embrace that she immediately returns. “Who’s this?” He asks.
“Y/N??” Dean’s voice rings across the clearing. You smile, swallowing back tears, and wave slightly. “The hell is she doing here??” His voice is thick with anger as he makes his way over to Mary. The venom in his words takes you by surprise. Mary raises her hands slightly.
“She was worried about you. Called your phone. I answered and she wanted to help,” she explains. You and Dean stand there, staring at each other. Dean’s eyes are full of a rage you can’t even begin to comprehend.
“How much do you know?” He asks.
“A lot more than I did a week ago,” you tell him. He shakes his head and looks to the sky before looking at his mother.
“Hey, Mom,” he mumbles, pulling her into a hug. She lets out a gasp of surprise and returns the embrace. Dean’s eyes never leave your face. “Let’s get out of here,” he says before walking straight past you.
You take a shaky breath and run your hands over your face. You had anticipated he’d be angry, of course. But you had hoped the joy of being together again would cancel that anger out at some point. Mary pats your shoulder before she starts to follow Dean. You debate on staying right there in the woods for a moment before falling in step behind them. Sam clears his throat slightly as you all walk.
“Mom, how did yall even find us?” He asks, attempting to break the tension.
“They helped,” she says, pointing to Mick and Ketch as they come into view.
“Dammit!! They know about her now too??” He groans, running a hand through his hair. “Y/N, get in the car.” You stare at him in disbelief for a moment. “Car. Now,” he demands. You wipe at your eyes furiously as you storm back to Mary’s car. Sliding into the middle of the back seat, you realize for the first time that the Dean you knew and this Dean, the real Dean, may not be the same person.
The five of them talk for only a moment before coming to the car. Cas takes the passenger seat quickly and Dean doesn’t hide the dirty look he gives him. You shake your head, unable to believe that having to sit by you in the car was that unsettling. Had you misinterpreted your entire relationship? Sam gets in on your other side and smiles at you, awkwardly.
“Y/N, wasn’t it?” He asks. You look at him and smile bitterly.
“Yes. It’s nice to finally meet you Sam. I’ve heard so much about you. And don’t worry. I know the feeling can’t be mutual. You’ve never heard of me before, have you?” You ask, letting your anger burst out for a moment. Dean’s hand tightens into a fist on his leg as he stares out the window. Sam’s awkward smile becomes apologetic before Mary changes the subject, filling them in on everything they’d missed.
Mary continues to drive on into the night. You catch Sam and Dean both nervously glancing at the clock at the front of the car. They seem to only be getting more anxious as the minutes tick by.
“So wait, you're hunting?” Dean asks his mother. She glances back at him in the mirror and shrugs.
“A little bit,” she says. Sam smiles and shakes his head.
“Yea, I knew you couldn’t stay away,” he teases.
The exact second the clock switches over to 12:00, midnight, the car dies. Mary eases it onto a bridge as she tries the key again.
“It’s time,” Sam says, getting out of the car. You look at him then over at Dean.
“Stay in the car,” Dean tells you. Rolling your eyes, you slide out right behind him, tired of being ordered around tonight. The others all get out as well and look around, taking in their surroundings.
“What’s happening?” Mary asks.
“Yea, Dean. Sup?” A new voice says. You all look over to find a woman standing in the middle of the bridge. You look around, trying to figure out where she could have possibly come from. Dean takes an immediate step in front of you, shielding your entire body. Instinctively, you step closer to him, your hand coming to rest on his back, assuring him you were there and okay.
“Billie?” Mary asks, recognition and confusion mixed on her face.
“The reaper?” Cas asks. You close your eyes, trying to think back over your studies. It wasn’t one of things you’d become familiar with but gauging everyone’s reactions, this wasn’t a good thing.
“I don’t understand,” Mary says, shaking her head. Dean sighs and hangs his head.
“Mom, that place…there was only one way we were getting out of there, and that wasn’t breathing,” he starts to explain. You glance around at everyone and notice the horrified look on Cas’s face. “So I made a call.”
“Dean talked to her and then Billie came to talk to me,” Sam continues the story. “And we made a deal. We’d get to die and come back one more time, but in exchange…”
“Come midnight, a Winchester goes bye-bye. Like, permanently,” Billie says, smiling. “And that is something  I’ve been looking forward to for a long time.”
“No,” you whisper from behind Dean.
“Why would you –,” Mary starts.
“We were already dead,” Dean tells her. “Being locked in that cell with nothing…I’ve been to Hell. This was worse.”
“At least this way, one of us gets to keep fighting,” Sam finishes. You shake your head, taking a step away from Dean.
“No,” you say again. He looks over his shoulder at you and his anger has completely dissolved. “Dean, no.”
“Hi, Y/N,” Billie says, waving. You look at her in utter shock but Dean steps between the two of you again.
“Leave her out of this,” he growls.
“You don’t have to do this,” Cas says, shaking his head.
“Yea, they do,” Billie says. “We made a pact bound in blood, You break that, there’s consequences on a cosmic scale. So, who’s it gonna be?” She asks, looking between the brothers. Sam looks at Dean, then at you, and back to Dean who shakes his head.
“Me,” Mary says before either of them can answer. She turns to face Billie, pulling her handgun from her waistband. Sam and Dean both immediately object, stepping forward to stop her. Billie flings both of them away with a wave of her hand. You rush to Dean’s side and fall next to him, immediately checking him for injuries. He shakes his head and fights to rise to his feet again.
“You said come midnight, a Winchester dies?” Mary asks. “I’m a Winchester.”
“Works for me,” Billie says with a smile. Mary cocks the gun and raises it toward her head. Sam and Dean both object loudly again, fighting to get to her.
“I love you,” Mary sniffs. Just as she’s about to pull the trigger, a sharp pointed blade pierces through Billie’s chest from behind and she immediately falls dead. You stare in shock at the dead body lying before you. Cas stands over her, the blade in his hand dripping blood. Mary lowers her gun as Dean and Sam are finally able to get to their feet. Dean takes your hand, pulling you up as well. You begin to pale as you stare at the body.
“Cas, what have you done?” Dean asks, looking at his best friend in shock.
“What had to be done,” he says. “You know this world – this sad, doomed little world – it needs you…” Your ears begin to ring and you take a shaky step closer to Dean. His arm comes around your waist, eyes never leaving Cas as he continues to talk. Something about keeping all the Winchesters alive.
“Dean,” Mary says, pointing to you. “First dead body.” Dean looks down at you just as you go completely limp in his arms.
**
Dean runs his hands over his face before taking a long swig off his beer. A lot had happened in the last day; dying, coming back again, running, fighting for their lives, getting back to their family, you, Billie, you, Cas killing a reaper…you. That was really the only thing on his mind…you. He had so carefully built a relationship with you. A relationship based on half truths and secrets but a relationship nevertheless. Now, you knew the whole nasty truth. It was going to be Lisa all over again…
“Dean?” Mary asks, sticking her head into the kitchen. He glances over his shoulder and smiles a little. “Can I join you?” Nodding, he points to the empty seat across from him. She walks over, taking the seat quietly. He stares at the bottle in his hands. “Dean…”
“You shouldn’t have told her,” he tells her firmly. “It wasn’t your place. I didn’t want her to know. She was safer not knowing. Now…I’ll never see her again.”
“What? Why?” Mary asks, confused. Dean stands and throws his empty bottle into the trash.
“To keep her safe!!” He snaps, spinning on her angrily. “People around me don’t hang around too long. They either run or they die. It’s as simple as that. Especially the ones who mean the most to me. And she means…” He stops abruptly, emotion closing up his throat. Mary frowns as she stands and walks over to him.
“It only seems that way, Dean. Y/N, she’s…she’s strong. She took everything I told her in stride and she stayed. She stayed here with Cas and she’s been learning how to do the job,” she tells him.
“That’s even worse!! I don’t want her anywhere near this,” he says, fighting back tears. “If it was just normal hunter stuff then maybe but the stuff we deal with…Lucifer and Amara and God…I want her as far away from all of this as possible.”
“Don’t you think she should get a say in this?” Mary asks. He shakes his head, stubbornly.
“No. Soon as she wakes up, I’m taking her back home. I’ll never go back to that diner.. She’ll never see or hear from me again,” he says.
“What?” You whisper to yourself, standing just outside the kitchen door. You turn on your heels and rush down the hall towards the garage. Your car was there and you’d spent enough time at the bunker to know how to get out. You hadn’t heard much but you heard enough. Dean didn’t want to see you anymore, plain and simple.
***
Three months, five days.
That’s how long it had been since you last saw Dean. You’d left the bunker, rejected and heartbroken, and Dean had kept his word. He hadn’t called. He hadn’t come in for any pie. Life was back to normal. Boring, regular, normal. You found yourself reading into everything you saw on the news, wondering if it was a case Dean could be working at that very moment. 
You’d volunteered to close down the diner for yet another night. Floors were mopped. Counters and tables wiped down. All you had left to do was lock up. Flipping off the lights, you step outside into the cool night air. You turn to lock the door when you hear footsteps coming up behind you. Damn it. You’d been so lost in thoughts about what you had believed was a werewolf in Michigan you hadn’t checked the parking lot first.
“Hello, love,” a heavy British accent says. There’s nothing familiar and certainly nothing friendly about the greeting. You stand frozen for a moment, weighing your options. You didn’t have many.
“We’re closed,” you say, not turning to face him yet.
“Not here for the pie,” he jokes. He’s closer than he had been.
“Look. My manager has already taken the deposit to the bank. I’ve got a few bucks in my purse and that’s it. I haven’t seen your face yet. You can turn around and leave, no consequences,” you tell him.
“Afraid not. Got a job to do. A message for your little hunter boyfriend,” he says. You let out a short laugh.
“You’re definitely barking up the wrong tree,” you say. His reflection is in the glass of the door now, standing right behind you. You take a deep breath and turn to face him finally. “Dean Winchester doesn’t care about me. Hurting me, won’t hurt him in any way.”
“We’ll see about that,” he says, brandishing a knife. You bring your knee up, hitting him in the groin. He grunts and doubles over, giving you enough time to run towards your car. Unfortunately, the blow doesn’t slow him down enough. Before you can make it to the car, he’s grabbed you by your waist, knife at your throat. “Any last words I can pass on to the Winchesters?” He breathes in your ear.
“Go to hell,” you spit at him. You feel the knife press harder against your skin as angry tears slide down your cheeks. What a way to go. Dying for a man who couldn’t care less.
Before the Brit can finish you off, a car whips into the dark parking lot, lights shining bright on the two of you. It takes your attacker by surprise and you feel his grip relax just enough. A sharp elbow to his abdomen has him letting you go. You fall to your knees as you attempt to run away. The car skids to a stop and you hear the voice you’d only dreamt of hearing again.
“Y/N!!” Dean yells as he runs at your attacker. He tackles him, knocking the knife from his hand as the two men hit the ground. Mary runs to your side as Sam runs to help Dean. You weren’t sure why. Dean had the upper hand, sitting atop the man, punching him in the face. Repeatedly. That’s when you realize, Sam wasn’t helping Dean. He was pulling him off.
“Dean, it’s over,” he tells his brother. “He’s dead.” Mary helps you to your feet, examining you as Dean makes his way over, wiping his bloodied hand off on his shirt.
“Are you okay? Did he hurt you?” Dean asks, taking your face in his hands. He looks you over and frowns at the knick on your neck. Running his thumb over it gently, he wipes the blood away. 
“I’m fine,” you mutter, taken aback by his gentleness and concern. Before you can say anything else, he pulls you into a crushing hug. You gasp and freeze before slowly returning the embrace. Mary touches Sam’s shoulder and nods back towards the dead body. They slip away to deal with that and give you two some privacy. “Dean…”
“I’m so sorry, Y/N. I put you in so much danger,” he says, letting you go. “I didn’t know we were being watched. I didn’t know.”
“Dean, what’s going on?” You ask.
“The British Men of Letters. Turns out it was a join or die type of situation. They’ve been watching all of us for a while now. They knew about you before you ever knew anything,” he explains. “They had brainwashed Mom but we just got her back. Sam and Jody led a raid of the Brits’ headquarters. Saw the pictures of you, of us here. We got here as quick as we could.” He winces now and you finally register how badly beaten he looks.
“What happened to you?” You ask, knowing your attacker hadn’t even gotten one good swing in. He limps over to his car and leans back against the hood.
“Grenade launcher,” he says, pointing to his leg. “Bad fight with Ketch.” He points to the rest of himself.
“Gre...huh??”
“They locked us in the bunker. Shut off the air supply. It was our only way out. And it was freaking awesome,” he says, smirking now. You roll your eyes at him and try not to smile, fighting back that familiar feeling he always gave you.
“Well, thank you. I’ll be more careful. Try not to close up by myself anymore,” you tell him, crossing your arms. He nods slightly, watching you.
“Or you could come with me,” he says. You scoff a laugh and shake your head.
“You don’t have to babysit me, Dean. I’ll be fine,” you say.
“What?” He asks. You shrug, trying to give him a confident smile.
“I’m officially relieving you of the burden of my safety. Whatever happens to me, happens. Don’t let it get to your conscious,” you tell him, looking around for your purse.
“Y/N,” Dean says. He watches you walk over and pick up the discarded item. You throw it over your shoulder and look back at him. “Come here,” he says gently, holding a hand out.
“You don’t want me. I know that. Please stop this,” you say, looking down at the gravel under your feet. You hear him sigh and look up as he starts to limp towards you. “No. Stop. You’re hurt.” He rolls his eyes now before taking your face in his hands for the second time tonight. This time his eyes aren’t searching for injuries. They’re searching for answers.
“Why would you think I don’t want you?” He asks, his voice softer than you’d ever heard it before. You get lost in the green of his eyes for a moment before the memory of that night comes back.
“I heard you with Mary. You said I wouldn’t see or hear from you again. And I haven’t since I left the bunker that day,” you tell him, hating to relive those harsh words. He nods, his hands leaving your face. They don’t go far though, immediately coming to rest on your hips.
“Is that all you heard?” He asks. You nod, wishing he’d just let you go home instead of dragging this out. “I didn’t leave you alone because I didn’t want you. I left you alone because I needed to keep you safe, because I want you too much, because I care about you too much.” Your eyes fill with tears as you stare up at him. You had to have died and gone to heaven for him to be saying these things, the things you wanted him to say so desperately.
“You were so mad when you saw me…”
“Because I didn’t want you anywhere near this life. Hunting, especially the things we end up hunting, it’s dangerous,” he pauses and closes his eyes. “I had just made a deal with a reaper to die. Again. I’d already resolved myself to the fact I wasn’t going to get to say a proper goodbye to you, tell you how I felt, how happy you’ve made me over the past year…and then you were there, right smack in the middle of everything. I was furious, yea, but not at you. I was mad at myself. I never shoulda came back here to begin with.”
“I don’t understand,” you say, shaking your head. Nothing was making sense. Nothing but the feel of his hands on your waist. That was good. That was right.
“I fell for you so hard that first night I came in for dinner. I was just supposed to come in, pick up something for me and Sam, and head back to the bunker. But when I walked in and saw you…I had to know you,” he recalls. “I thought a couple of visits couldn’t hurt. I could just be a customer, see you, talk to you. Maybe you’d eventually learn my name. That third time I came in and saw you getting ready to leave I was devastated. So I asked you to join me, thinking there wasn’t a chance in hell. You’d just gotten off work. Surely you wanted to get out of there and get home. But you stayed and you sat with me and…I knew I was in trouble.” You’re crying now. You don’t know exactly when the tears started but they were falling quickly. Dean brings one hand up and wipes at each of your cheeks gently. “And then you gave me your number…man, I almost called you from the booth,” he laughs. You do as well, reaching up and taking his hand. You press a kiss into his palm.
“I never knew what we were. I was so confused,” you tell him.
“I’m sorry. I kept going back and forth. I told myself it was too dangerous, you were safer as my friend. But then I’d get you alone, in my car and…” His hand tightens slightly on your hip and he pulls you impossibly closer. “I wanted you so desperately.” His voice dropped lower and his eyes bore into your own.
“I wanted you too,” you just manage to whisper. His forehead is touching yours now. Your eyes flutter close as his breath washes over your face.
“No more secrets,” he says before finally bringing his lips in to meet yours. This isn’t a gentle, chaste first kiss. Your lips move desperately against his as your arms wrap around his neck. It was everything you’d imagined and nothing like you could have dreamed all at the same time. His lips were chapped but gentle. He tasted of mint and whiskey. The way his hands moved over your back, one sliding just beneath your shirt to caress the skin at the small of your back, was intoxicating. You force yourself to pull away, remembering that his family was in the near vicinity.
“I have one secret,” you admit. He looks down at you expectantly. “I freaking hate this job.” He laughs and shakes his head, kissing you once more quickly.
“Sweetheart, I got bad news. That ain’t a secret,” he teases. You laugh too as Dean looks over your shoulder at the diner. “This place is gonna go under without your pie. It’s the only reason anyone comes back.”
“Including you?” You ask. His smile turns into a smirk as he looks back down at you.
“Why do you think I’m keeping you at the bunker?” He asks. Laughing again, you try to step out of his arms but they only tighten around you. His face is suddenly serious again as he watches you. “But only if you’re absolutely sure. I can’t stress enough how dangerous this life is.” You smile as you take his face in your hands.
“Dean,” you start. “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”
With that, Dean kisses you once again.
You leave your diner key in the door and a note taped to the glass.
I quit. -Y/N
****
Tags: @roseblue373
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ghost-proofbaby · 1 year ago
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SO SCARLET (IT WAS MAROON)
CHAPTER FOUR: CASTLES CRUMBLING
AND HERE I SIT ALONE, BEHIND WALLS OF REGRET. FALLING DOWN LIKE PROMISES I NEVER KEPT.
☆ pairings: rockstar!eddie munson x fem!reader
☆ warnings: no use of y/n, strong language, angst, mentions of RUMORS of workplace sex scandal, minors dni
☆ WC: 5.4K+
☆ A/N: if you would like to listen to the song that eddie is recording at the end - it is an actual, real life song. :-) it is called "blood sport" by sleep token (one of my favorite bands i get to see live next week!!), and i highly recommend listening to it during your reading. especially the latter half of this chapter.
thank you to my love @hellfire--cult for the divider!
masterlist
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“Alright, so – anyone care to fill me in on what the Hell that was?” 
Matt stands like a disapproving father figure as the band lines up opposite of him just outside the building. Eddie had hoped nothing would be mentioned until they were in the car, but the driver was clearly running a few minutes late.
Three of the boys glance at each other, worried expressions immediately giving up the hoax even as Eddie only shrugs and says, “What do you mean?” 
“Cut the shit, Munson,” Matt had never appeared so livid, so undone by irritation. His usual patience with Eddie is nonexistent, “What’s going on between you and that girl? Is she a past groupie?”
The insinuation gets a scoff out of Gareth. Jeff side-eyes him in warning, but Eddie couldn’t care less, “No, she’s not a past groupie. This was the first time I’d ever-”
“Don’t lie to me,” Matt points an accusatory finger at Eddie, narrowing his eyes, “I am your manager. If you have any unsavory connections with that girl, I need to know so I can decide if we need someone else to organize the event. We are not having another repeat of the Lewinsky scandal.” 
“I knew it! I fucking knew you called it that, too!” Gareth cheers, but he’s quieted by one look from their furious manager.
The Lewinsky scandal had been their code-word for when the tabloids had become convinced that Eddie was fucking an assistant at the label. A girl had even come forward and claimed to have had sexual relations with Eddie, and he had taken heat for it for a full month before the buzzing novelty worn off.
Eddie had only spoken three words to the girl. No, thank you when she’d offered him a mug of coffee during a late night at the studio. He wishes now he’d been less polite. 
And he also finds himself wishing that’s all this was. He wishes you were just another scandal, another terrible rumor spread around. If all the accusations between you two were false, if all the hatred was based on misconstrued circumstances, it would be so much easier. He can talk himself out of that. He can confess to those sins and get off with no more than the order of one hail mary from Matt. 
But you? The reality of all that had happened, both all those years ago and just thirty minutes ago? He can’t find the words. They choke him up, unwilling to leave the cavern of his chest and enter the world, just like all the songs gathering dust as demos. 
“It’s not going to be another Lewinsky scandal,” Eddie scowls, feet shuffling against the concrete below him. Can’t be another Lewinsky scandal if she wants nothing to do with me anymore, “Maybe she just doesn’t like me. I am allegedly a very polarizing public figu-”
The car pulls up, and Matt is quick to grab Eddie’s shoulder before glaring at the boys, “Get in, I’m not finished with our polarizing public figure yet.” 
Grant and Gareth only let out low whistles, following instruction without lingering as they clamber into the back row of seats in the SUV. Jeff takes his time, though, going as far to pause beside Eddie and place a hand on his back.
“Just tell him the truth, Eds.” 
It’s the final nail in his coffin. Eddie is cursing Jeff’s retreating figure as he climbs into the vehicle and shuts the door, leaving him alone with Matt. 
“Explain,” Matt demands, “Now.” 
Eddie’s eyes focus on a gaping crack in the sidewalk, jagged and uneven, right down the center. 
He has two options. He could continue to lie, insist he knows nothing about you until Matt just gets bored of not being offered the truth. Or he could admit it all, reveal the muse behind the art he had been fiercely protecting over these last few months. Every line, every chord, every broken note that had left his lungs during those witching hours in the studio. 
On one hand, it’ll rip away the opportunity that has been offered to him on a silver platter – the opportunity for closure. Selfish, bloody closure that neither of you had gotten, it seemed. But on the other hand, it might grant him some sympathy. Matt, the label, the producers – they had all grown tired of the dance Eddie led them in every time they’d inquire about the music. But if Matt knew-
It’s a dead end trail of thought. He knows he won’t admit to the worst of his atrocities he’s committed. No scandal, no late night ending with him in handcuffs, no fraudulent headline is going to compare to what he did to you. What you did to him.
It’s a little too late for damage control, anyways.
“I went to high school with her,” the lie works well enough, easing some of Matt’s frustration, “I was just shocked to see her. All of us were shocked to see her. No big deal.” 
Eddie knows the people around him have come to learn that they must pick and choose the battles they engage in with him. And he can see that decision flash across Matt’s face as he decides that this is not a battle necessary to the war.
“Alright. But if you’re lying to me-“
“I’m not lying.”
“If you are, that’ll be one of my last straws, Munson.”
It won’t be. Eddie knows it won’t be. Everyone, every single goddamn person in this world it seems, is capable of giving Eddie Munson unlimited chances — except you. You, it seemed, were the only person who had come to their senses. 
You always were smarter than people gave you credit for.
“Run the track again.” 
They’d spent a few hours in the studio already. It was an odd hour for them to be haunting the space, more used to visiting in the dead of night rather than the middle of a weekday, but it was down to the wire now. Vocals needed to be recorded, instrumentals fine-tuned, tracks properly mastered. Eddie could no longer hide in the night when it came to recording the haunting melodies stained with the blood of his past — no matter how wrong it felt to see a sliver of sunlight breaking through one of the windows, just through the top of the blackout curtains.
“I really think that was the one, man-“ the producer starts, probably just tired after repeatedly running in circles with Eddie’s perfectionism.
He doesn’t care. He’s paying them, they can stand to let him re-record as many times as necessary to satisfy Eddie, “Run it again.” 
The silence only continues to buzz in Eddie’s headphones. He’s ready to cuss out the producer as he angrily shoves them down, off his ears and hanging loosely around his neck, the wire a leash as he whips to face the one-way glass wall. The lights are off at the main board, guaranteeing that they can see Eddie but Eddie can’t see them.
Until suddenly, the light comes back on, and the reason for the absence of the repeated track Eddie had requested becomes obvious.
Gareth.
He stands at the center of it all, a few paces from the seated producer with a deep scowl on his face. 
“What the fuck?” Eddie says, mouth just close enough to the mic for them to catch his overflowing annoyance, “I said-“
“We heard what you said, Eddie,” Gareth interrupts, his voice just loud enough to be faintly heard even as the headphones curl around the nape of Eddie’s neck, “But I need to talk to you.” 
It’s the strictest tone that Gareth has used on their lead singer in an unfathomably measure of time. Probably because it’s the most words he’s said to Eddie in a very long time, as well.
Eddie finally removes the headphones, hanging them carelessly on the mic stand and moving towards the door — surprisingly, without putting up a resistance.
The control room is warmer than the fairly large area that served as a ‘booth’. Smaller, as well. Cramped with a low couch and one too many chairs available to trip over, the control board spanses the entire wall that holds the oversized window into the recording room. A plethora of small lights twinkle like stars, and numerous switches that Eddie had come to know better than the back of his hand alternate positions to guarantee the clearest sound. Only Gareth and the producer occupy the room, the rest of the band having taken off around the fifth time Eddie had requested a redo of his vocal tracking.
“This better be good,” Eddie complains, furrowing his brows, agitated at the interruption. 
But Gareth shows no remorse, “We need to talk.” 
“Yeah, you said that already.”
“We need to talk,” Gareth repeats, eyes flickering to the poor soul still seated at the controls, “Alone.” 
Eddie hardly has to open his mouth, the man jumping out of his seat the moment the lead singer flicks his wrist to signal for him to leave.
Whatever Gareth was about to say had to be important, and it’s that thought rather than the difference in temperatures that has sweat building on Eddie’s brows.
Is he about to quit the band? Is he about to tell me he’s had enough? Maybe he’s done with my bullshit — I would be.
“Speak, Emerson,” Eddie flatly insists, grabbing a small water bottle out of one of the mini fridges in the room before he throws himself onto the worn leather of the couch, “And make it quick. We’re on a time limit, you kno-“
“We’ve gotta talk about her, man.” 
Her as in you. 
For a moment, Gareth sounds like a friend again. He’s dropped all the persistent perturbation he’s taken to defending himself with when it comes to  Eddie, his voice pleading as he stands before the distant man. All the rueful power plays that had developed over the last year vanish. It’s just Eddie and Gareth, bandmates who started out in the latter’s garage in some small Indiana town. Not Eddie Munson, infamous rockstar with a chip on his shoulder. Not Gareth Emerson, passionate drummer overshadowed by the ego of his lead singer. Just Eddie and Gareth.
 “We all know you didn’t tell Matt the truth.” 
“I did tell him the truth-“ 
“Not the whole truth, then. There’s no way he’d let it slide if he knew that she was your ex-girlfriend.” 
The defiance vacates Eddie’s body quickly. He doesn’t even attempt to prowl his mind for a quick quip in response. All he does at the words is drop his shoulders, the defeat creeping up on him as he deflates. 
Ex-girlfriend. The title feels so pitiful to truly describe what you were to him. 
But to be fair, even when he had been in your good graces, girlfriend had also never felt significant enough.
“Did-“ Gareth starts after a beat of silence, noting the way Eddie couldn’t quite hide his wounds on the topic, “What did you guys talk about? When you went after her, what did she say?” 
“Nothing important.”
Eddie turns into a shell, a zombie as he stares straight ahead and tries to compartmentalize. That always worked; with meetings, with arguments, with lectures. Even before the fame, it worked.
It doesn’t work quite as quickly when it comes to you. His brain, it seems, is incapable of uncrossing all the wires you twist within his brain.
“You two were alone for, what, ten minutes? And you’re telling me she didn’t say anything important?” 
“What the fuck is there to say?” Eddie laughs soullessly, “Oh, hey, stranger! Remember me? The guy you up and left without a word?” 
“Yes!” Gareth shouts unexpectedly, “Yes, that’s exactly what you should have done! She left. Not just you, but all of us. We never even really knew why. And now- what? Are we just supposed to pretend we don’t know her?” 
Eddie knew why. She’d never had to say it, and that was the issue. He always thought about all the answers he swore he craved, and always let every question he claimed to have haunt him during the waking hours. But when the day turned to night, when he was left to nothing but his own devices in a dark and empty apartment during the witching hours, he knew. The question of why had been answered since the first phone call cut short with you during that goddamn tour.
The songs knew, too. He supposes it had been an arrogant assumption to believe the band had read into his lyrics and put the pieces together. 
“That’s exactly what we’re going to do,” Eddie nearly whispers, throat tightening and fighting him on the words. It’s the opposite of what he wants and needs — but it’s what you want and what you need. And so he plays the messenger, even as it kills him, “We are going to completely disregard my past with her. We are going to treat this entire situation as professionally as possible. I’m talking the full nine yards: you will not mention the fact that we know her, you will not question her about anything from the past, and you will not, under any circumstances, ask her why.” 
His own set of rules he’d privately set for himself in his own mind during the car ride over. 
Gareth squints his eyes in disbelief, “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. Are you serious?”
“Deathly so.”
“This isn’t just about your past with her,” the boy nearly passes, starts to reach up to tug on his hair before he thinks better of it, “This is about the way she left all of us. Not just you. She was a friend to all of us. She was the one who taught me how to tape my drums when I’d bust a hole in them, she was the one who helped us design our first merch, she was the only person any of us would let be in the room during practices. And not just the band stuff, either,” Eddie watches tears form in Gareth’s eyes, “She was the only one who had the patience to help me with my fucking math homework back in school, man. She was the one who nearly curb stomped Jason Carver the week he sent Grant home with a black eye. She was the first person Jeff called when his parents broke news of their divorce, for fucks sake. Not me, not you, not any of us — her,” Gareth’s breaths come out as pants as he stops his pacing and stands before Eddie. The tears continue to lace his bottom lash line as he heaved silently at the end of his rant, his pained expression completely unexpected to Eddie. 
This is the part Eddie chooses to forget. He’ll let himself swim in the memory of you late at night, he’ll indulge in vices that always amplify his pain rather than succeeding in his attempt to numb it, he’ll stare down the mirror each morning and curse the reflection he finds with all the blame in the world he is capable of holding in the palms of his hands. But in all the ruptures of his own old scars, he fails to consider that he is not the only one burdened with loss. 
They all lost you. When Eddie lost you, so did the band. You’d become a ghost to more than just your abandoned lover — you’d become a tired haunt to boys you’d known, boys you’d befriended and burrowed your way into the lives of, just as well. 
“She was our friend,” Gareth chokes out, fists curling at his sides, “Jesus Christ, I- I get it. She was everything to you. Whatever. But she meant a lot to the rest of us, too. Whatever happened wasn’t just some isolated event — you two didn’t just hurt each other. You set off whatever bomb erased her from our lives, but it left the rest of us with some damage, too. Don’t forget that.” 
This is the part where Eddie should apologize. This is the part where, once upon a blissful time, he would have said his repentance. 
He doesn’t.
“I don’t care how hurt anyone is,” he lowly responds, eyes unable to meet Gareth’s any longer, “I’ve told you the rules, we’re going to follow them. End of discussion.” 
Gareth throws back his head, and Eddie winces at his scoff, “She’s not your fucking property, Eddie! She isn’t solely yours to keep or whatever the fuck you think you’re doing!” 
Eddie can’t even deny the action of keeping you. All the demos, all the songs laid to the grave because he couldn’t stomach the thought of releasing them for others to experience. 
But that’s not what this was. This, the cataclysm that was sending Gareth to finally release all this pent up frustration, was him following your rules. You’d made your wishes for this project very clear, and he needed to at least try to respect them. They all did. 
So he takes on the role of the bad guy. He lets them paint him as the villain if it means no red will stain your ledger. 
“Oh, I think she’s made it very clear that she isn’t mine,” the mask slips on far too easily for Eddie. Cool demeanor, compartmentalizing. Not you, but his emotions towards his friends, if he could even still call them that. His bandmates that he had once seen as brothers. “Doesn’t change what I said. Don’t push it, Emerson, or there’ll be Hell to pay.” 
“What are you going to do? Disappear on us?” Eddie finally looks back up to meet Gareth’s fiery gaze as he spits out hateful words, “Hate to break it to you, but you already left this band behind two years ago. And if you ask me, you should start leaving the vanishing act to her. At least she doesn’t make us pay for her mistakes.” 
Eddie is by no means done with the conversation, more than willing to continue fighting with Gareth, but the other boy clearly feels differently. He leaves his words hanging in the air as he spins away, storming out of the door, the air in the studio now several degrees hotter now with the irate fuel of the fight.  
It was all a blood sport. All of it. It didn’t matter if Eddie was fighting with the band, the management, with you. It was all bloody and fruitless, and it all left him the same awful type of hollow in the end. 
He stares blankly at the wall as he makes a silent decision.
By the time the producer has timidly returned to the room, Eddie has already set up his laptop to connect to the studio's system, prepped so that any recording would automatically copy into his personal hard drive. A way for him to listen and ruminate in the privacy of his own apartment. 
The sheet music torn from his notebook already lays at the table besides the entrance to the booth. 
“Do you… want to run the track again?” the man, the stranger, asks. He clearly heard the fight. Eddie and Gareth hadn’t been exactly quiet in their screaming match. At least, Gareth hadn’t been. 
Is it really a screaming match if only one side fights back? 
“I want to lay a new track,” Eddie’s voice is deadpan as he clicks a few buttons, finalizing everything. He only needs the man to click record, “A raw piano and vocal demo. We can add the rest of the band later.” 
“I-“
One look from Eddie, hardly passed over his shoulder with a glimmer of unbridled determination, and the man quiets as he takes his seat. 
Eddie storms into the booth without another word, fist curled around the page of lyrics and terribly hand-drawn music clefts. 
She isn’t yours to keep.
Eddie was aware of that. Painfully, painfully aware. But it had never been about his claim to you. 
Gareth was right. Eddie never wanted to own you. Keeping you, however, had been something he should have taken more care with.
The chill of the small room to record in does little to lessen the flames eating Eddie up as he bypasses the assembly of various instruments all crowded in the space. Gareth’s drum set, Jeff’s guitar, Grant’s bass — he storms right past them, eyes locked on the grand piano in the fair corner. It took up the most space, far too large to have been forced to be contained within this compact room. 
Eddie drags the mic from where it had been stationed previously with him, quickly and recklessly resetting it at the piano. 
Once he’s seated on the bench, crumpled pages thrown up onto the music desk of the piano and headphones snug over his ears again, the producer finally clicks on his mic to speak.
“Hey, uh… Does this demo have a name by chance? Or do you just want to label it as an unknown for now?”
It certainly does have a name.
“Blood Sport,” Eddie spits out. “Just name the file Blood Sport.” 
The hum that would indicate to Eddie when those on the other side of that glass window were speaking clicks off, and he takes it as his cue.
He’d written the song a while before. There were some gaps in the lyrics, some notes he’d played with on his personal piano scribbled over and never replaced. He’d never played it in its entirety before. 
It starts slow. His fingers hold the ivory keys delicately, arranging for the first opening notes as if he were slotting his knuckles against your own for the first time over again.
She isn’t yours to solely keep. 
Were you ever his to keep, ever? 
Even the ivory keys of the Steinway are more solid than you ever were. You were nothing more than water, than blood, destined to slip between Eddie’s fingers. He never stood a chance in having you, in holding you, in keeping you. 
Not just now, but before all the blood shed, as well. He should have recognized Cassandra’s curse the first day he looked into your eyes. He should have known the twist in his stomach was only Fate sinking its claws into the two of you. 
A tale fit for a Shakespearean stage — a tragedy always meant to be.
“I want to roll the numbers, I want to feel my stars align again.” 
Eddie’s voice is soft to match the steady beat of piano notes that emit from the crooked curl of his hand against the keys. A soft thump, a gentle lull. And instead of losing himself in the music, he finds himself wrapped up in one of the many memories he’d chosen to lock away for the last two years.
Something was off. 
Eddie’s stomach had twisted with anxiety of something being wrong for weeks. You stopped answering his calls, his texts, every form of connection with him. But as he stood in front of the door to your shared apartment, the bile rose even higher in his throat. 
He smelt the decay of what he had done before his key had even entered the lock. 
“Would you invite me again? Won’t you pay for your arrogance? Won’t you show me your weakness?” 
You were never his to keep. 
His voice nearly cracks as he approaches the first chorus, not finding the strength behind the vocals he’d always envisioned for the song.
The click of the door opening echoed through the apartment. It felt empty the moment he’d crossed the threshold – you could have just been tucked away in the bedroom, or even in the bathroom, but he knew. 
You hadn’t been returning his phone calls. You hadn’t been returning his texts. He knew something had happened, something had changed. Irreversible damage had been done, and he would now have to face the mess he’d created to return home to. 
“I made loving you a blood sport.” 
He repeats the line until it rings in his head, over and over. Until he swears the words could crack his bones, and the stars that will show in the night sky will do nothing but mock him for the self-inflicted pain.
At first, he convinced himself you just weren’t home. You’d gone to the store or to see friends. You’d be home soon enough and then, the two of you could scream at each other all you wanted. You were angry with him, rightfully so, but he’d rather you yell and scrap with him than the alternative. He didn’t care. Because he was here, back in the flesh and willing to take any and all cruel words you had sharpened for him. The two of you would fight, yes, but at least that meant there was still something there worth fighting for.
After the first three hours, he realized with a sinking stomach that the alternative might just be his reality. 
“I want to be forgiven.” 
He recalls the look on your face when you’d first seen him today. The fall of your act, the discarding of grace and composure.
The look that told him that he can want all he’s capable of. He can want, he can crave, he can yearn, he can tear himself apart bit by bit with his feeble yet shattering cravings — it won’t change a thing. 
You were never his to keep.
After the clock struck the fifth hour of his return, he started his calling.
Over and over and over, he was met with your voicemail. Endless messages spoken and sent alike. Every single one trying to be gentle as they inquired where you were. Letting you know he was back. Going as far as to ask you if the two of you could talk. 
He wanted to fight. He wanted to fight, because it meant you still saw something worthy within him.  
But even more than Eddie wanted a fight, he wanted you to come home. He wanted you to be there, to welcome him into your safety and remind him he was human again. It was selfish – he was so goddamn selfish – but he needed to feel your skin against his and remind him that he was still a person beneath it all. Beneath the demand, beneath the unwarranted adoration from strangers, beneath all the fractures the sudden traction had left him with – he was still a breathing, living person. He was still your person. 
Eddie’s fingers begin to slam against the keys with increasing urgency as his chest heaves out with every syllable. Repeating, and repeating, and repeating the chorus as if it changes a single thing. He loses himself in it all; in the music ringing in his ears and the memories now drowning him as he confesses all his sins to the microphone. 
You never came home. 
There was no fight, and after the hours reached double digits right along with his ignored phone calls, he had to accept the truth.
You weren’t just at a friend’s, or the store. You were gone. Truly, truly gone.
The drawers once filled with your belongings were vacant. The smell of your perfume was nothing more than a whisper across the pillows. Eddie scoured the entire apartment for signs of you, turning every single piece of furniture over looking for clues. He never thought to check the counter until he’d already ruined the space, terrorizing it in a frenzy before his eyes landed on the letter and the key.
He had approached them both hesitantly. All his denial drained from his body, like the blood pumping through his veins, as his fingers pinched that silver key so gingerly.
A past he can never return to. A home he will never hold the key to again. 
The joints of his fingers ache and his lungs begin to burn for all that he lost — all that they all lost — because of him. His  own foolishness, his own downfall. He did this. 
The aftermath is blurry.
He read the first few words of your letter before promptly crumbling it with his tortured fist, knowing exactly what it said without needing to fully swallow all the words just yet.
He never fully read the letter. He skimmed it, a week later, but not that night. 
Then came the flashes of the pain. The way he’d swung his fists at air and menial objects alike. A vase holding wilted carnations met its demise on the kitchen floor, a hole in the wall appeared that he later had to patch up, one of the coffee tables ended up across the living room with a leg splintered half off. 
He never dropped the key. 
Even as he dropped to his knees in the center of the broken glass, bleeding shins to match his bruising knuckles, he still held that small piece of silver fiercely. He pressed it so tightly, dug it so deeply into his palm that it later left a scar. And not even the way he had grabbed at the broken glass surrounding him had the capability to mar it away as he let it slice his skin, crying out, hopeless and devastated. 
You were gone. He had lost you, and he had been arrogant enough to never even notice it.
“You say it doesn’t matter.” 
The headphones had long since slipped off his head, and he makes no move to adjust them. He hadn’t even noticed that his body had begun to fall forward and curl into the piano until he’s weakly choking out the final lyric that he hadn’t even written down onto the page. 
He hadn’t noticed the tears falling, either.
What were meant to be gasps for air as his fingers fly across the keys in a haunting melody are only sobs. Cries of pain as he no longer can see mere inches ahead of him, a scar of the center of his palm stinging as if brand new, his heart and head pounding in sync. He isn’t even sure if the producer he’s forgotten the name of is still recording. He lets the sobs slip out as he continues to play. 
He can’t quite end the song yet. The moment he does, he’s terrified of the version of him that he will have to face once more. All those surface blemishes from the beginning of the end had run deeper beneath his skin. He was nothing more than rubble and fractures now, splintered every which way until he had become unrecognizable. When he looked in the mirror, all he could see was a creature of destruction.
“You set off whatever bomb erased her from our lives, but it left the rest of us with some damage, too. Don’t forget that,” Gareth’s voice echoes in the silence beginning to gather between the notes.
Another wrecked sob leaves Eddie as he finally finishes off the melody, playing entirely unaffected up until that point. Reality crashes down. His body shakes, shoulders hunched as his forehead connects against the freezing wood of the piano and he pinches his eyes shut tightly enough to be left in total blackness. 
He couldn’t play another note if his life depended upon it.
The memory fades with the final note before his head rattles with a new image. The smile, the grimace, you had offered him before you two parted ways today. An effort at professionalism that Eddie had seen right through. 
Pain. That’s what had twitched in the corners of your mouth. The same pain, if not worse, as the one that now radiated through every atom of Eddie’s broken figure on the piano bench. 
He can’t fix it. Not your pain, not Gareth’s pain, not his own pain. The time for damage control, for sincere apologies and any reconciliation has passed. Just like watered-down blood through his fingertips. 
Eddie hopes that the producer has had half the mind to stop the recording when he stands and slams the drumset behind him into the wall. Destructive, just as he had been the night he returned to an empty apartment. Just as he had been when he’d been the one to rot and wither away all that you two had once held between you. 
They can replace the drum set. Surely, he has a person for that. 
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thesunfyre4446 · 5 months ago
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I’m surprised to see so many people happy with the Sept scene, it’s complete illogical fan service.
They should’ve been clawing at each others faces. Instead you have Rhaenyra chuckling and joking “I’ve begun badly” girl, Vhagar made a mukkbang out of your son. A little bit of “Bitchy Alicent” peeked out towards Rhaenyra but still. Alicent knows Rhaenyra is a liar, the “On my mother’s memory” is a dig at that so why should Alicent believe at face value that Rhaenyra didn’t order Jaehaerys’s murder?
Rhaenyra also never apologizes about Jaehaerys, never expresses remorse or condolence. Her feelings last episode were more to do with it being bad publicity and less that a child her littlest sons ages was murdered. The whole thing is being treated like a one sided Rhaenicent fic where they wax on and on about Luke’s death and Alicent must repent for it every single day and twice on Sundays. While Jaehaerys is brushed over, that is if he’s even mentioned at all. His murder is never something that Rhaenyra needs to atone for. It’s never something Alicent or Helaena hold a grudge towards her for. All is forgiven.
That’s what the show is doing.
Not only that the Sept scene has ruined the potential of f Rhaenyra taking King’s landing. This meeting didn’t end badly, they didn’t throw insults or hands. Both just said they had no part in the murders of their son and grandson, both believed the other. Then Alicent let Rhaenyra go peacefully and Rhaenyra never intended on actually stabbing Alicent.
Alicent tells Rhaenyra that she meant it when she said she’d make a fine Queen- despite Rhaenyra never showing the potential to be a great ruler and Alicent deploring her for years because Rhaenyra’s lack of regard for duty usually led to Alicent having to fulfill them as well as her own and Viserys’s.
While Rhaenyra walks away from this reaffirmed with this thought that Alicent is still this pure soul and gentle heart- despite Rhaenyra accusing Alicent of hiding her true nature behind a cloak of righteousness and then saying “Now they see you as you are”. How do you go from getting sliced by Alicent to basically saying “Alicent is a sweetheart, she wouldn’t hurt a fly!”
Sure Aegon is about to almost die from injuries gotten in battle against the blacks and Rhaenyra will lose Jace and Viserys, that is going to impact both women but after this meeting of “It wasn’t me!” The other things can be explained away too, can’t they? Rhaenyra didn’t directly burn Aegon and Alicent isn’t the one who skewered Jace and kidnapped Viserys.
The build up of tension, rage, hate, resentment was just destroyed with this meeting. It doesn’t bode well for the Queen in chains/Half year reign/Maegor with teats storyline. We probably aren’t going to get one of the lines of all time, Alicent saying that her Grandson was an innocent child and Rhaenyra’s sons were “bastard blood shed at war” and Rhaenyra probably won’t even put Alicent in gold chains.
The entire war just seems pointless after this, these two started this way before Viserys died. With Driftmark or even long before that when Rhaenyra had Alicent’s father exiled from Kingslanding and Alicent wore that dress… but they don’t want to finish it anymore?? These women are about to sacrifice their whole families for this and neither of them want it. Now they realize how pointless it all was? How they could’ve co-existed in the same place?
Also, why have the writers seemingly forgotten about Alicent’s very valid fear for her children’s lives if Rhaenyra ascended? Her fears are being validated with each episode yet they’re hinging it all on the ramblings of a dying man while he was dope sick?? On Viserys’s ramblings why didn’t Alicent(the writers) remember the conversation Alicent and Viserys had by the fire in ep 3? The one where Viserys explicitly says “a male babe born to me wearing the conquerors crown” he’s describing his son Aegon. Could Alicent have not countered Rhaenyra’s “he meant the conqueror” with “No, years ago he told me the same thing”
After having the blame of her Grandson’s murder placed on her for having non dissociative sex for once in her life, yet again Alicent will be filled with guilt. This time at the thought that the entire war and its casualties are her fault because of a misunderstanding.
Free Alicent, Ryan Condals whipping boy.
I would honestly take Benioff and Weiss, at least the seasons where they had the material laid all out for them were good. Condal has a full story outline but is still fucking up right out of the gate.
(Sorry for the long rant)
anon you ate and left no crumbs. i truly have nothing to add.
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up until ep 7 the show made sense. in ep 6 alicent tells aegon that if rhaenyra becomes queen him and his brother will be murdered. but by ep 8 she apparently doesn't give a fuck anymore?
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www-bvnny-b4b3couture · 3 months ago
Text
Teeth
Deadpool and Wolverine needed help and Wade had the perfect(not at all) person in mind.
No idea abt the word count
Warnings: Blood, cussing, inappropriate jokes, small amounts of cannibalism, knarly looking mouth ima tell u now lmao
(Background on her for context, her mutation is actually that she can heal from basically any injury, BUT, she’ll only heal if she dies first. So to heal she needs to kill herself. She’s also just stronger and faster than the average person. Because of this scientists tracked her down and took her hostage, experimenting on her to get the “ultimate killing machine”. So they gave her those teeth and mouth, along with an insatiable craving for human flesh. Think like combining her dna or sum. Now her handlers use her as an assassin, and she’s somewhat succumbed to the instinct implanted in her brain.
I wanted to make a character like Mileena from Mortal Kombat, I love knarly powers 🙏🏼)
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“Who the hell are we meeting, Wade?” Logan asked once they walked past their tenth storage unit, they were at the docks. “Uhh hold on I remember the number of it.” He held his finger up, inspecting each number and once again shaking his head ‘no’. Logan was starting to lose his patience when he suddenly pointing at a black cargo container.
“Alright- oh! I forgot to mention she doesn’t really like me.” Logan let out a genuine laugh, “Nobody likes you.” Wade just gave him a deadpanned face for a second before knocking on the door quite hard.
They were met with complete silence, Wade turned to Logan, “Mind knocking?” Logan rolled his eyes and knocked three times, this time the noise was startling and the crate was almost vibrating. “Attaa boy, I didn’t think mine would be loud enough.” Wade slapped Logan on the back, earning a scowl from him.
After a few seconds they heard some metal move and the door open an inch, 2 tiny throwing knives shot out. Wade let out a girlish scream, “Honey buns it’s me!” He shrieked, dodging another tiny knife.
“Wade get the fuck outta here!” A female voice suddenly shouted from inside. It was beginning to close but Wade quickly ran and grabbed it from her, pulling it back to open more, “You wanna lose your fingers fine!”
“Well now would be a great time to help, Wolverine!” Wade shouted his hero name mockingly, struggling against her. Logan firmly grabbed the door and all of a sudden the woman was easily overpowered by 2 to 1. An animalistic growl was heard as the door slid open and a black haired woman fell forward.
On all fours she sent a quick to Wade’s stomach, sending him flying back into another cargo container. Logan saw she had a black mask covering half of her face, only piercing amber eyes could be seen. She tried to kick him but he caught her by the ankle, she struggled against his grip. While she was physically stronger than Wade, not against him.
Realizing her situation she slipped her mask off, Logan cringed at the sight of her face. It looked like she had unhealed gashes along the corners of her mouth. A guttural growl escaped her throat and she opened her mouth. Her mouth began tearing at the sides, opening far wider than a humans mouth should, sharp razor like teeth lined her mouth instead of human teeth.
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Suddenly sharp cat-like claws came out of her gloves and she slashed at his arm, causing him to drop her. She jumped up, attempting to slice at him but her eyes widened when she saw the giant claws coming out of his hand, stopping her attack. She growled and pushed against him, getting close enough to try and snap at him with her mouth. She wrapped her leg around his, using the fact he was heavier and knocking him over, with him falling first.
She attempted to bite at his face as they fell, using his forearm to block her bite she suddenly let out a painful scream when she bit down. She wasn’t aware of the adamantium encased all around his skeleton. She pushed herself off of him, making sure to get a bit of distance before stopping and clutching her mouth. “You fucking cock I think one of my teeth snapped.”
“Good you ugly bitch.” She scowled at Logan, who was staring at his bloody arm. “Fuck you, who do you think you are coming to MY house and knocking on my door like that?” She cursed back at him.
They both all of a sudden looked to Wade, who was just now getting up. “We need your help! You’re the only one I know who could help me find someone in 24 hours.” She rolled her eyes, “Why would I help you. The last time I saw you, you ran me over AND LEFT ME THERE. Which. FUCK YOU.”
That made Logan snap his head in Wade’s direction, giving him a ‘are you serious bro’ look.
“Well you tried eating me remember darling.” She rolled her eyes at him with a low growl, “Like always you were in my way.”
“Seriously what the fuck is wrong with both of you.” Logan muttered, she glared at him, her teeth becoming more visible.
“I can’t help either of you. Even if I wanted to.” She spoke calmer than she had the whole time, walking back into her box. But not before roughly bumping her shoulder into Logan’s on her way.
“She wants me.” Logan rolled his eyes at Wade, completely irritated with him since he wasted their time.
2 days later…
Wade and Logan were easily cutting down the men in their way of getting to the man they needed. Now on the third floor it was suspiciously quiet. They walked cautiously, guards up.
“Hey fuckheads.” Their heads snapped in the direction of the voice and Wade gasped when he saw her. “Baby! You care about me after all.” She scowled at him, “I will fucking eat you.”
“It’ll grow back every time.” She sighed in frustration and pulled out 2 sai from her sides, “You need to stop getting in my way.” She looked at Logan, “You too.”
Wade’s eyes widened in fake betrayal, but in reality he wasn’t surprised her handlers had her here. “Oh honeybuns, one day you’ll see I’m always there for you and you’ll realize you’re in love with me and we’ll make nasty debilitating hot sex.” He droned on, she shifted uncomfortably by the end before a dagger landed in his mouth.
She ran on all fours at them before jumping up and landing on Deadpool. Letting out the growl of an animal, her mouth open wide, biting Wade’s forearm clean off. Not stopping there, biting and snapping at him like a mad man. Her teeth easily tearing into whatever flesh she could.
She let out a screech when she felt something impale through her shoulder, pulling her back and lifting her up by her shoulder. She bent her back, trying to claw at Wolverine but he landed a punch right in her nose, she growled, using a sai in her hand and slashing at his hand where he was holding her captive by claw.
That caused him to retract his claws and she grunted feeling the metal slide out and landed on all fours, kicking Logan’s knee and making him drop down. As she was turning around she noticed a flash of red and was suddenly blocking a strike from a sword.
“We were meant to be honey buns. I’m your unlimited buffet.” She could see a grin through his mask and she slashed at him with her free hand, jumping up and trying to snap at him. With his other sword he caught her mid bite, she growled, struggling against him. He could see his sword beginning to fold and he kicked her knee harshly, crunch. That made her release his sword and fall on her knees, she wasted no time though and sent one of her sai into his torso.
She let out a shriek when she felt herself be impaled right in the stomach by familiar claws, and then she heard static in her ear piece before hearing a familiar voice. “MK. Scientist Lenovo has successfully been transferred to another location. Pull away.” She gritted her teeth, well it was a bit late now.
The two men noticed her change, now longer looking determined. She went a bit limp in Logan’s claws, looking at Wade, “The man you want isn’t here anymore.”
“What?!” Wade shrieked, looking into her eyes, not trusting if she was lying or not but as he looked into her eyes he knew she was being honest. “God dammit! So you were just here to distract us!”
“Get your fucking claws out of me.” She turned her head to Logan who was behind her. “I should slice through your ugly ass.” She gritted her teeth, “Fuck you old fuck.” She felt his claws dig in deeper somehow and she tried not to let a sound of pain out. She grabbed onto Wade who was arms length and used him to pull herself off. “Oo I knew you would see it one day-” He started before getting socked in the nose. She knocked him back into the wall.
She landed a bit weirdly since her knee was broken, she put distance between herself and the two men. She needed to get out of here soon.
“MK. Pull out.” The voice in her ear piece sounded less patient than before, she looked around a bit frantically. The sound of a helicopter could be heard and she saw a bright light from it appear from outside the window.
Logan was able to hear the voice in her intercom and realized she was looking for an exit. She sighed and realizing the quickest way out.
“Why do you work for them?” The question was out of nowhere and it made her brows furrow at Logan, she stared at him for 2 seconds silently. “What else am I supposed to do?” She scoffed at him before running at the window full speed and jumping out, the glass shattering making her eyes ring.
As she jumped out there was a rope coming down from the helicopter. It began pulling her up, he could see into it. There were a few men in complete black getups inside, one of the men suddenly raised a gun to her head, firing without hesitation.
That made Logan’s eyes almost pop out of his face but Wade laughed and pointed at his face, “Oh my god you should see your face. It’s ok silly goose she can heal like us except she needs to die first. So inconvenient huh? We’re so much better right. Made me shit myself the first time she hopped back up.” He nudged his shoulder earning a glare from Logan.
“Gives me the creeps.” His expression unreadable as he watched the helicopter disappear into the air.
A/n: This is the first ever fanfic I wrote on tumblr guyss. Lowk wish I could say it was better but like I’m barely gettin my groove guys. 🌚 Ima probably make more parts for this since I just like wanted to write how they met first. Also the pics r just refs for her mouth not actual her looks.
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emthimofnight · 9 months ago
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I love Stellar! She's so cute! Love your art, keep being amazing, et cetera, but also I have a question:
You mentioned that at the time of Stellar's, shall we say, adoption, Shadow and Sonic were still in their "it's complicated" rivals era. I'm guessing Shadow wasn't especially close to Sonic's friends either? And that kinda got me wondering: how do Sonic's friends feel about Stellar when she first arrives? Obviously they love her on sight, but like, does Tails feel weird that he's now basically Shadow's brother-in-law? Is Amy a little alarmed at the thought of Sonic and Shadow being responsible for a literal baby? Does Rogue foresee the inevitable Sonadow to follow? And so on ...
Idk, would love to know more about the early days and everyone's reactions.
EEEHEHEH thank you so much for the compliment!!! 🥰🥰🥰
And I'll give you a quick rundown on everyone's feelings immediately after Shadow brought Stellar home!
Rouge was the first to know, as she was actually present when Shadow discovered Stellar. The two of them had been tracking some leads about Project Stellar for a while, not realizing they were stumbling upon another attempt at Project Shadow until they were right on top of it. Rouge initially tried to reason with Shadow, recognizing his anger instantly and trying to convince him to let cooler heads prevail. She even tried to warn him against removing Stellar from her stasis pod, fearing that it was acting as some kind of life support and would kill her upon removal. Shadow decided to remove her regardless, deciding that either way, a life in the government's hands as a weapon was no life at all. Still, Rouge convinced him to take her straight to Sonic—and, more importantly—Tails, since he had the tools at his disposal to give Stellar a proper look over.
Sonic and Tails live together, so they were the next in line to find out. Shadow basically showed up looking like he was out for blood with a baby in his arms, demanding that Tails use his equipment to see if she was okay. Tails and Sonic both wanted more of an explanation (like, where did you get a baby, WHY do you have a baby, why do you look like you just got out of a fight, etc) and Shadow would begrudgingly tell them what he'd learned, clearly deeply uncomfortable with the entire conversation.
Well, to say they would both be shocked would be an understatement. Sonic would be at a loss for words, for once. Tails, ever the scientist, would immediately want to look over Stellar to see if Shadow was telling the truth. By the time Shadow had handed the baby over to Tails, Sonic's brain would have rebooted and the motor mouth would start up again.
He'd be in total disbelief, really. He'd just start yammering on about every question and concern that would come to mind.
"The government tried to make another you?? With ME?"
"Does that make me a dad? Does that make YOU a dad?? ARE WE DADS??"
"I can't take care of a baby, I don't even remember BEING a baby! What do babies even eat??"
Etcetera, etcetera. Shadow would just stand stiffly in a corner of Tails's workshop, laser focused on whatever tests Tails would be running on tiny baby Stellar. He would totally tune Sonic out, instead focusing on the barely noticeable rise and fall of Stellar's chest, petrified that she might stop breathing if he looked away.
Honestly, the first night would be VERY tense. Shadow would still be high strung from the rescue, Sonic would be trying to wrap his head around the whole idea, and Tails would be devoted to running all the tests he could on Stellar to try and get some answers.
Tails would determine she was healthy, showed no signs of requiring any kind of life support, and was definitely Shadow and Sonic's biological child. Half Shadow's DNA, half Sonic's.
He would also realize in his tests that her energy readings were off the charts. Whatever they had been cooking up in that lab wasn't good, and Stellar was almost like a living chaos emerald. He'd immediately be concerned about the implications of keeping her around, but Sonic would have come around by that point, deciding there was no way he and Shadow would be getting rid of her.
Shadow wouldn't be so sure. He'd suggest talking to Rouge, Amy, or Vanilla about being a mother to her instead, since he wouldn't be confident in his own abilities to raise a child. Sonic would be annoyed by that, pointing out that it would be pretty messed up to try and pass her off on anyone else. Vanilla and Rouge both have their own kids to worry about, and Amy lives in the Sol Dimension with Blaze most of the time. He'd reason that they should at least try. Besides, who could possibly understand her more than Shadow?
Eventually, they'd agree to try raising her as a team. It'd be a begrudging decision, but one they'd learn to live with. The two of them wouldn't be romantically involved at this point, either, so the two of them had a LOT of growing pains trying to figure out how to parent together. Getting a baby government assigned to you is one thing, but having to raise it with your rival is another!
Oh, and as for Amy, Knuckles, and the rest of the group? They'd almost all be horrified LOL! Stellar definitely received a rocky reception at first! They all grew to love her eventually, though.
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