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#also if you or anyone who reads this have your own theories PLEASe for the love of god add on I would LOVE to read them.
Note
I've been browsing the WoJ website, as one does, and realized just how excited Mr. Author seems to write Mirror Mirror Marcone, and now I'm very excited for that book too.
Do you have any theories about how that will go? Will Marcone be a good guy? 👀 Omg what if he went from the army to law enforcement. Imagine what that man could do in SI. ⚰️
YOU HONOR ME WITH THIS QUESTION HOLY SHIT (so very genuine; you are my beloved Dresden Files mutual) but bear with me because this is gonna be a long post. I have toooo many thoughts. God I'm sorry. /jov
BUT GOD. YOU HAVE HIT THE QUESTION I REPEATEDLY THEORIZE WITH MY PARTNERS. OUUUGH. There are SO many ways this could go I am gonna be SO very real and I love every single one of them bc it keeps my brain shoomvin'!
But considering WOJ has mentioned that this particular universe is ours but gone to shit MUCH quicker due to one of Harry's earlier decisions "Mirror universe Harry is different by one choice. One. And everything else just follows after that." WHICH MEANS. WHICH MEANS EVERYTHING STAYS THE SAME. UP TO THAT CHOICE. (I can't remember how early, so it could be a pre-books decision, or it could be a in-canon alternate decision) so Marcone depending on how early in the canon it is, I see a couple different options!!
NOW OBVIOUUUSLY. There are an ABSURDDDD Number of choices Harry coulda done EXTREEEEMELY DIFFERENT!!!! However. one that comes to mind-- at least if he's talking early series!! and from the sounds of it, he is, because he says everything goes to shit a lot fucking faster than our timeline-- is in Fool Moon.
Marcone gives Harry a choice in the Fool Moon garage; sign on and become an employee of his, or die by the people he's trying to protect Harry from. Marcone ALSO gives Harry the choice to stay off the case in Book 1.
What if Harry chose EITHER of these options? What if he stayed off the Victor Sells case? The entire series spiraled from there--- THAT'S THE REASON MARCONE CAME TO HIM FOR HELP IN BOOK 2!!! MARCONE, UPON NOT BEING ABLE TO GET HARRY'S HELP, RESORTED TO FBI AGENTS WHO BETRAY HIM AND TRIED TO FEED HIM TO A LOUP-GAROU. AND THEY WOULD'VE GOTTEN AWAY WITH IT IF IT WEREN'T FOR EVERYONE ELSE (including Harry) STUCK IN THE PIT BELOW WITH HIM.
Now Jim has said he's very excited to write Marcone; so I imagine he's not fucking dead but. What if this series of events leads him to Nicodemus instead of Monoc? What if he becomes a knight of the Denarius THAT FUCKIN EARLY so he could better protect Chicago?; ESPCIALLY SINCE HARRY HASN'T KINDA LED HIM THROUGH TRIAL BY FIRE AND SAVED HIS ASS ON MULTIPLE OCCASIONS (as does Marcone vice versa).
But if Fool Moon has the changing point, then we've got a different route; Harry working for Marcone. That now begs the question of-- Would that have made everything gone to shit that much faster??????? Maybe !! As a consultant for Marcone? And telling him all the BULLSHIT that the White Council does? That the Red Court is doing? In his city?? Our evil Harry might be Marcone's enforcer-- as Mister Jimothy mentions, "If [Harry] was Lawful Evil I’m pretty sure he’d be Marcone’s enforcer."
Or might have been, at one point, in this particular universe. Either way, a very DELIGHTFUL choice of thought, but probably not where Mister Butcher is gonna take it.
Option 2; Marcone is FBI/Special Investigations -- LAW ENFORCEMENT TIME BABYYYYY!!! LAWFUL EVIL MAN STILL ON HIS LAWFUL ACT BUT THIS TIME IN THE MORE LITERAL SENSE! (/very jovial) I see this one happening if it's a complete Star Trek Mirror Mirror moment; he's still a powerhouse, he's still an ice-cold mf, but he's more of a deadly serious Fox Mulder, especially if the same event took place that made Marcone-- well-- Marcone! I'd see him being the same type of character, but more on the ground this time around; like he was in White Knight type beat; manpower and in-the-know folks taking down monsters to protect the citizens. Maybe he'll be giving our Harry a helping hand!! Especially if Harry is being framed for, you know, MURDER, as it's being told to us. Maybe we'll be having a soul-gaze, and because (I PRESUME) this universe's duo has already shared a soul-gaze it's a "Oh. Yeah no you're not lying. What. The fuck. Okay." OR, he's one of our main obstacles! BOTH ! AND!!!! Considering that Mister Butcher mentioned that we'll maybe be seeing something related to Marcone's capital n Name in this book... Definitely a possibility.
Option 3; He's literally just a guy! -- Less likely of the options? Yes. Still an interesting thought experiment? Also yes! This is ALSO based on this specific WOJ;
Q: I read the short story from Marcone’s point of view, “Even Hand,” and I noticed that John Marcone is not his real name. Is that going to be significant? Sure is if somebody tries to cast a spell at him using the name “John Marcone”! That’ll be a big deal. But we’ll have to see how that works out. Actually, the character that’s really interesting is the Mirror Mirror universe Marcone, and we’ll get to him in a few books.
Maybe! He's not John Marcone! Or, more accurately, he's the Marcone we see in Helen Beckitt's vision! Maybe he's still that charming motorcyclist who works for the mob! Probably VERY aware of word on the streets about Harry, and in Mirror Mirror, we'll see him go "huh. what the fuck." about our Harry! because THAT'S not the guy everyone dreads! This is a fucking goober! Powerful goober-- but tall, lanky ass, goober! Built his own paranet perhaps, due to the fact that Harry is not a "good" man in this universe.
I very honestly don't know, there's so many variations of these, ever so slight changes, and I am CHOMPING on my theorizing bit.
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galesdevoteewife · 9 months
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Gale may not be so typical squishy wizard/scholar?
-My Galeology study note-
Looking at his character sheet in the Deluxe pack gets me thinking, maybe our wizard is not exactly designed to be the typical squishy one...?
[Act2 spoiler warning]
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2 things caught my eyes:
1) Great physical fitness, and good reflexes. (For your reference, Gale & Wyll are the two companions who have the highest Con: 15. I put everyone's sheets at the bottom of the post.)
His Con and Dex are... very high?? I mean, higher than Karlach and Lae'zel...????
Note 1: I suspect it could have something to do with his background as Mystra's chosen, as they are somewhat "transformed" when they agree to become the goddess's chosen. A topic for another day since I haven't quite figured it out yet, for anyone who is interested there's a chapter about it in The Seven Sisters. Also, I have little clues on how much chosen lore credit Larian was taking into account while designing him, or how Mystra's "taking back the given ability" works. Note 2: Again, Mystra's chosen are often sent on missions that involve a lot of traveling according to Elminster's series. Mystra also mentioned that Gale and she used to have adventures together, which leads to an assumption: despite his preference he might be traveling quite a lot until he was cast aside and quarantined himself in his tower. Might be the type of scholar who is very keen on field studies?
Note 3: Can someone undress Elminster to exam my theory please??xD Neh won't work I think all human might share same body model in game
Come to think of it, there was a party banter between Karlach & Gale that went like :
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Karlach: Whoa! Almost slipped there. Gale: You wouldn't be the first, I'd wager. It's been some time since these walkways felt the carpenter's hammer. Karlach: You gonna catch me if I eat a brick? Gale: With my reflexes? I'd catch you before you so much as stubbed a toe.
At first I thought that was a sarcastic joke but, seems like it wasn't? Also this:
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Karlach: Ready to enter the belly of the beast? Gale: It's the stairs I'm dreading. I shall close my eyes, and pretend I'm climbing my own, far superior tower in Waterdeep. Karlach: In that case, welcome home.
...So it seems when I pictured him as a homebody, I should reimagine the concept of home... His has...lots of stairs? Just walking around in the tower could be counted as a workout, sort of thing? Note: I don't think the place he shows in the Act 2 cutscene is his tower. Otherwise, aren't these neighbors pretty much doomed?
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2) Not THAT smart. Well, I love him, so I will speak in his defence: [1] He has a warm(s) digging holes in his brain. [2] Poisonous magical bile running in his blood. Maybe he's just not at his best, makes sense, eh? Wyll mentioned he is nerfed after tadpole too. After all, this man obviously memorized a DICTIONARY:
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Gale: You promised to stay in Waterdeep. 'Promise,' verb, meaning to swear something will or will not be done. Tara the Tressym: And I decided 'will not'. And a good thing, too. You look like you haven't had a good meal in days
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Player: When I said we could be more than friends, you answered 'perhaps'. What does that really mean? Gale: If I recall correctly, the Waterdhavian Dictionary of the Common Tongue of Faerûn defines it as an adverb that conveys the meaning of 'it may be that', or 'possibly'. Gale: Sorry, sometimes I just can't help being quite insufferable. In seriousness, I'm glad you asked that question.
Along with a bunch of you-may-never-need information:
Everything about ceremorphosis? Myconid? Why in the world have him read about Cazador??? And how can he not know the distance between Waterdeep & Baldur's Gate, even Karlach ―who spent a decade, which is likely half of her life in hell― knows better geography than him. Gale either totally ignored the subject or portaled everywhere; distance meant nothing to him?? Uh, but you can't take party banters too seriously; it's buggy. How could a bug bit Karlach in the swamp? It should've been burned into ashes before it even reached her, no?
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Anyway, just rambling some thoughts <3 I would have gone to Harvard if there was a major in Gale...
-DISCLAIMER- Brought to you by a brainrot wife, Galerian missionary. Be warned the article might has (strong) bias because the writer is braindead and she thinks Gale is the most awesome character in the world.
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halemerry · 1 year
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hii first of all, i absolutely love your metas on GO s2! your breakdown of the last few minutes of ep6 was really insightful and i love you for your meta about aziraphale and his role as a protector - it is a very astute look into his character and motivations which not a lot of people acknowledge in their theories/speculation after s2.
more to the point of this ask: this is something i've been mulling over and is the only thing that still doesn't make sense to me in ep6. why is crowley so nonchalant, or at least not noticeably worried, about the metatron showing up to the bookshop (a space he is very protective of) and taking aziraphala away for a talk after aziraphale has already been threatened by micheal? throughout the whole season crowley has been extremely protective over aziraphale and is very much aware of the real danger he is in (re: the book of life). this is also right after crowley has returned from heaven and has learned what the metatron was willing to do to gabriel to ensure 'institutional integrity' and that much bigger plans were afoot. i find it hard to wrap my head around his calm demeanor when the metatron enters the scene and takes aziraphale away, even if it's supposedly for a harmless talk. i wonder if you have any thoughts/speculation about this?
(opps this got too long and rambling). i would love to hear your thought but ofc please don't feel pressured to answer :) love your posts about the season and i look forward to reading more from you. have a lovely day!
Hi!! Thank you so much! This ask has had me by the throat basically since you sent it. It sort of touches on some things I already wanted to write about so forgive me if this spirals a bit.
So in a lot of ways I think this is a question that can have a one word answer. But since I do wanna talk about the way the show gives us this answer I actually want to start with Nina. Specifically I want to start with the thing she tells Crowley as Aziraphale’s off with the Metatron.
“You’re the hard bitten one that can’t trust anyone ever again and Mr. Wherever He Is is the soft one that still believes in magic people being basically good and all that."
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I’ve talked a little bit about this line before in my meta about the build up to the Confession here because I think it’s important to view from the perspective of how it preps Crowley for the following conversation he’s about to have. But, aside from that, I think it's really important because it's wrong. Nina is describing herself here, not Crowley. She’s projecting her own issues onto him and Aziraphale in the way that she perceives herself relating to them. Crowley himself is actually the one that calls out her trust issues for what they are explicitly. 
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Nina doesn’t trust and she sees herself in Crowley far more than Aziraphale both in demeanor and aesthetic so she assumes he doesn’t trust either. But she has it backwards. Because Crowley isn’t hard bitten as much as someone who tries very hard to be perceived as such. And, most importantly in this specific context, Crowley actually trusts quite a bit.
And he nearly always has. Even as far as back as the Starmaker.
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Just look at the way that the Starmaker and Aziraphale both talk about interacting with God. Aziraphale is nervous, anxious and pretty much immediately clocks that what the angel that would become Crowley is saying is going to get him into trouble. But the Starmaker? Even upset about the information he’s been given, he remains confident in the fact that it can’t hurt to ask a few questions. He trusts there to be no consequence for expressing an objection. He trusts that his opinion is valued. Even if he ends up wrong here there’s no inclination at all that he thinks his words will be taken inappropriately. And even the Fall itself doesn’t burn this out of him.
We see him trust Aziraphale, the cherub who was supposed to be guarding Eden from things like him, not to smite him on sight. And trusts him enough to not only have a conversation but express his own worries about his own actions. He then approaches Aziraphale like a friend at the Flood and makes no attempt to censor his horror at what is happening there.
Job is the first time we see Crowley act in a way that implies mistrust between them. This is the first time they’ve met since the Flood which I suspect is contributing to his reluctance to be honest with Aziraphale here. They fall into their roles and then very rapidly fall out of them. The fact Azriaphale reaches out to Crowley here is important. As is the moment where Crowley asks Aziraphale if he’s sure. After Aziraphale more or less agrees to be all in something changes. Crowley is surprisingly honest about his view on the world, mostly trusting Aziraphale not to use it against him. He places himself in front of a host of angels, trusting that Aziraphale would not expose him. And then later he’s even more honest, admitting to Aziraphale he’s lonely in an attempt to show solidarity.
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The entire Arrangement could not exist without them trusting each other. Crowley’s pushing at Aziraphale’s boundaries is a constant exercise in trusting that Aziraphale will come around eventually - or that he at the very least isn’t about to weaponize the treacherous things Crowley is saying against him. As early as 1601 we see Aziraphale voicing active concern for Crowley's well being. We then see Crowley actively trust Aziraphale with both their safeties in 1941 - whether it’s trusting Azriaphale to save them from the bomb about to drop on them or trusting Aziraphale’s trust in him to not accidentally discorporate him during the bullet catch. They even explicitly talk about their mutual trust in this year during their shades of gray conversation.
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During Armageddon Crowley shows up trusting that Aziraphale will help him fix this and once Aziraphale agrees never once seems to consider the idea that Aziraphale would hide anything from him (even when Aziraphale is actively doing so).
He also critically knows that Aziraphale tried to reach God and got himself discorporated as a consequence. And likely specifically knows that Aziraphale talked to the Metatron and came away from that conversation realizing that Heaven would not help him. It's worth noting whether Crowley knows this bit or not that in this conversation Aziraphale not only explicitly questions the Metatron's authority but also uses the conversation to extract information from the Metatron.
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Aziraphale leaves this conversation with an active lie to the Metatron and attempts to call Crowley to tell him everything he knew. He then continually chooses Crowley over Heaven. They pick their own side and help stop the world from ending.
And then, all season, Aziraphale keeps proving that the trust Crowley has always had in him is well earned. Aziraphale, even more than Crowley himself, brings up ideas of 'us' and 'our side' and 'our car'.
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Aziraphale openly talks negatively of Heaven. Not only does he agree with Crowley's disbelief that Heaven managed to stay in charge sending people like Muriel down, but he even goes a step further, implying that they perhaps never had control over earth in that way.
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He also, most critically, immediately and without hesitation, tries to turn down the Metatron's offer to even have a conversation. Aziraphale, who has also just brought a group of archangels to order, reaffirms his lack of interest in Heaven right then and there in front of Crowley. Right when the Metatron has reaffirmed the threat of the Book of Life is out of play.
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Crowley trusts Aziraphale. He always has. And more than ever lately Aziraphale has given him proof that he doesn't have to worry about where he allegiances lay.
But. It's also worth noting. I don't think Crowley is as chill as he maybe seems like he is. Yes, he's sprawled out and speaking casually here, but to some degree this is a bit of posturing. He's playing it cool and also not encroaching on the control Aziraphale has managed to wrangle on this situation. But he also doesn't just let them wander off either. As soon as they hit the door, Crowley is out of the chair and walking to the front of the shop to watch them leave through the window. He's keeping tabs as they walk away.
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He then banishes Muriel and promptly starts to clean. Now I'm always a little wary to mix Book and Show canon, but I do think his cleaning of the bookshop (as well as him carrying around stacks of books while babysitting Jim) are manifestations of Book!Crowley's tendency to want to stress clean. He's keeping himself busy and gets done too quickly then promptly glances at his watch before throwing himself into the chair with a frustrated noise. He's anxious and stressed the entire time Aziraphale is out of his line of sight.
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In other words, Crowley's not actually as calm as he's presenting himself to be. He's trying to take that nervous energy out in a way that doesn't conflict with giving Aziraphale agency. Because he trusts his angel. And that in part is why it hits him so hard when it all blows up in his face.
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tin-wufborf · 2 months
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Tin's Favorite Sterek Fics (Part 12)
Hello party people, and welcome to part 12! This installment is brought to you by my summer cold because there's nothing quite like having a cold when it's been 100+ degrees all weekend!
Again, thank you all for all of the support you've shown this series. Before we move forward, I just want to give you all a little heads up that we are now entering my "anti-Scott McCall" era (which I have yet to leave, tbh; I just read less Bad Friend Scott McCall fics than I used to). There aren't a ton of them on the list, but there's enough of them that I feel like a warning is a good idea, and I know there will be more moving forward. Okay? Okay.
No more rambling on for me. I'm working against the clock in terms of when my sinus pressure kicks in for the day, and I want to get this out sooner rather than later so I can get back to simulated trucking.
Smoochies and squeezies!
List and links to previous/next part(s) below.
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DISCLAIMER: This is me warning you all that some of the fics I've included in this list may cover explicit, dark, and/or "taboo" subject matters. I cannot express enough how little I care what anyone thinks about any of that; all I want is for you to use caution when reading anything I've listed here and to please review and heed whatever tags the authors have provided in order to keep yourselves safe. Your experience from this point on is your own responsibility, not mine and not the authors'.
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Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17
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You and the Night by Hyperion327 (E | 1/1 | 9,634)
Stiles has a secret. Ever since he was ten, there's been... someone who appears in his night from time to time, someone with glowing gold eyes that no human being could ever have. His shadow has been there for years, keeping watch in the darkness. He should be scared, should have told his sheriff father about the intruder from the beginning, but he can't. Not when the shadow has been the one who's comforted him on the lonely nights. Even if he can't see him, he knows one thing for sure: He trusts him absolutely.
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Oblivious Misadventures, and Other Such Tales by Little Spoon (JaydenNara) (M | 6/6 | 11,240)
Going to college was exciting and new, a chance for new friends and a fresh start, and the best part was, there was a supernatural fraternity on campus, meaning Scott finally had the freedom to be himself.
Then he met the resident human who came with a stalker alpha. What was the point of a supernatural fraternity if he still had to pretend to be human. And seriously, did Stiles ever fall asleep somewhere normal?
--
(aka - Five TImes Scott Found Derek and Stiles Sleeping, and the One Time He Didn't)
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Theory of Overprotective Canines by reosepetals42 (T | 1/1 | 11,798)
Stiles is totally looking forward to living alone in his super cool apartment off-campus. He is. He is also very excited to bike to school every day, ready to set up an awesome game room, and definitely over his crush on Derek Hale. Completely over it.
Or at least he is until Derek decides he's moving in with him. And then turns out to be the perfect roommate. And then starts attending all his classes. As a wolf.
This is not going according to plan.
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Throw Me to the Wolves by skoosiepants (T | 1/1 | 13,493)
He feels the physical embodiment of devastated, his already too strung-out mind struggling to wall up all the hurt, the rejection—he takes a deep shuddering breath and looks down at the shredded skin on his arms, at the sluggish way they’re weakly healing.
There is nothing, nothing he wants more than to have Derek sweep in and make everything all better. He should have known, though, that something like that would never happen to him.
OR -
Stiles accidentally gets bitten, and everything goes to hell.
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Where We Belong by thecheekydragon (E | 1/1 | 16,548)
Derek rescues a little werewolf girl and takes on the responsibility of caring for her. Stiles helps.
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And The Moon Shined A Little Brighter by LuneFaitLaFolie (T | 1/1 | 17,952)
It’s not in the same spot, it’s over his left shoulder blade, almost like it’s over the back of his heart, but it’s just as big. It isn’t black either, so it also doesn’t match any of his other rune tattoos, which Stiles can say with confidence without looking, are either black or blue. No, it’s a deep red, the same colour as Derek’s alpha eyes.
It is though, a huge ass matching triskelion permanently on his body, and he has no clue how the fuck to tell Derek about it.
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Safe Place to Land by Green (T | 1/1 | 19,298)
The Hales have been tracking a group of hunters who've targeted small packs with the help of a magic user. When they finally attack the hunter compound, they aren't expecting to find Stiles, a Spark who's practically a slave, and his young werewolf son. Derek isn't expecting the Spark to be his mate, either.
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Foolish devouring things, build your castle in me by LunaCanisLupus_22 (E | 1/1 | 23,181)
“I will marry you,” he declares. “But should any more harm come to my father or my people, I will raze the earth itself until I feel the lifeblood drain from your corpse and paint my skin with it.”
It is not an idle warning, but from the princeling it has none of the desired effect. Derek feels no fear, but in this instance at least diplomacy triumphed over the spilling of more blood. It is all the same to him anyway. But Regent Peter was most insistent they avoid a drawn-out, gruelling war.
“Then we have reached an accord.”
Or the barbarian sterek war AU that nobody asked for.
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She Walks in Beauty series by breakaway71 (2 works | G-T | 29,144)
1. Innocence (G | 1/1 | 964) Claudia wonders, sometimes. 2. All That's Best of Dark and Bright (T | 1/1 | 28,180) It's not a gender identity crisis if you've known all along what the problem is. If you've been purposely trying to ignore it since you were old enough to consciously make that choice. But what happens after that, when you finally learn how to let go?
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No Rest For The Wicked (Love is Kind) by midnightcas (G | 11/11 | 31,328)
When a homeless, scared for his life, kid attempts to hold up Stiles Stilinski's bakery, the last thing he expected was to be offered a muffin...or a job. . . . "I have a feeling that you don’t want to be a felon on the run from the cops your whole life. Especially over such a stupid thing like robbing a bakery. Murder I’d get, but this?”
“Well," his eyes fall to the gun, "I might murder you.”
Stiles swallowed.
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The Accidental Hale Brood by Julibean19 (M | 1/1 | 42,370)
“I know, I just…” Derek trailed off, rubbing his forehead with both hands, frustrated that the right words weren’t coming to him.
“What?” Stiles asked honestly, pulling on one of Derek’s wrists until he could see his expression again.
Derek’s heart pounded in his chest so loud he figured even Stiles could hear it. He inhaled deeply and let the air out slowly through his nose, trying to keep his voice even. “When we take them places, and spend time with them, and make them smile… it feels like…”
“It feels like they’re yours,” Stiles finished for him, licking his lips before snagging the bottom one between his teeth.
“No,” Derek said, taking Stiles by surprise. “It feels like they’re ours.”
“Oh,” Stiles said simply, mouth still slightly open while he contemplated Derek’s words.
Or, the one in which Stiles and Derek have been BCPD partners for years when they are assigned Halloween duty and run into a couple of kids from the orphanage. One fake marriage and two real adoptions later, they somehow become a family.
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Ain't no rest for the wicked by MBlack93 (E | 8/8 | 46,463)
''What the hell happened, Stiles?!'' He hisses.
Stiles tries not to flinch from his dad's tone, but he fails miserably.
''I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I - I woke up and everything in my room was in flames, even the bed, dad, I - I don't know what is happening.''
As soon as he said it, his dad's face closes off.
''You're telling me that you don't know? You didn't remember? Is it possible that you're - you're poss-''
''NO! No, no! No! It can't be. It just can't.''
''But you don't remember Stiles. You don't know what happened.'' His dad remembers him. His eyes are boring into Stiles's.
Stiles falters because no, he doesn't remember, he doesn't know what is happening, but the Nogitsune is gone, he saw it happening, he knows it's gone. He can't be possessed any more.
''Dad-'' before he can finish his sentence, his dad lets out a weary sigh. And a sob escapes his dad when he looks at the burning house.
''I - I don't know if I can deal with this son.'' His dad confesses. And - and that's it. Stiles stops doing anything for a moment until a sob escapes him, and he can feel his heart break into a million pieces.
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I'll be right back (in 24 years) by AnaIsFangirling (Ana_K_Lee) (T | 35/35 | 48,190)
When Derek thought about time travel – and he did, a lot – this was not what he'd had in mind. He'd thought he would see his younger self, tell him to leave Paige alone and NEVER trust Kate Argent. He'd thought he’d get to come back once that was done and everything would be perfect. He never imagined having to relive his entire life.
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Those Are The Days That Bind Us series by s_a_m (3 works | T-M | 63,389)
The series follows Stiles as he struggles to deal with the trauma, heartbreak and betrayals that cause him to run away from Beacon Hills, and the adventures that come during his time away.
[Subsequent parts are in progress and will be posted upon completion.]
1. Those Are The Days That Bind Us (M | 5/5 | 52,171) His father wasn’t stupid. He was an officer of the law, trained to look for patterns. He confronted Stiles about werewolves and they shouted and Stiles tried to explain but his father was so, so, so mad, more mad than Stiles had ever seen him, ever in all his life and then his father looked at him and said, “It’s like you’re not my son anymore.” And Stiles broke. 2. You Have One New Message (T | 1/1 | 5,093) A flash in the corner of John’s eye caught his attention. The home phone had a message. He hit play. ‘You have one new message.’ “Uh, hey Dad. It’s uh, its Stiles.” 3. Himmelfahrtskommando (M | 1/1 | 6,125) She can’t help but laughing at the growing knowledge that her whole life has likely just been one long suicide mission.
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stuck in reverse by crazyassmurdererwall (smartalli) (E | 1/1 | 65,656)
Look, Derek is the worst. Everyone knows that. Their fearless leader is a total and complete failwolf.
Which means the rest of them? Are kind of the worst too. They’re a ramshackle, slap dashed, sorry excuse for a pack that’s about a half second away from getting one of them killed. And this is a problem, because Stiles would really like to survive high school. Thanks.
Still, nobody deserves what Derek has gone through. Nobody.
And it’s about time somebody told him that.
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Just the Same by foxlavender (G | 7/7 | 68,066)
Something is seriously up with the captain of the lacrosse team. There's just no way Derek Hale is human. *** “I was wondering if you're even human. You move so quickly. I mean, it's ridiculously fast. No human should be able to move that fast, y'know? It's unfair for us. I mean, it's obvious you work out, and I don't, so that could be why, but like...I was just wondering if you were human, that's all.”
“Stop talking, Stilinski, or I'll—”
“Put me on the bench all season?” Stiles asks knowing full well that Derek Hale can't threaten him with shit.
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The Fox & The Wolf by Dextrous_Sinistrous (E | 10/10 | 79,151)
The war between the fox and wolf clans has raged for centuries, ignited in a time before anyone can remember. Now both clans—tired of the bloodshed and hate—are searching for a way to end the war.
Crowned prince Stiles Stilinski—heir to the fox clan—has agreed with his father to meet with the Hales, the ruling royal family over the wolf clan. Under the counseling of the Druids, both clans are presented with a solution to the war: unite the Stilinski and Hale clans through marriage. To quell their people's anger, both Stiles and Derek—eldest living Hale Alpha—are urged to accept the other as an equal; as their mate.
For the sake of their people, both houses make the ultimate sacrifice by choosing duty over love. But, out of what was first assumed to be compromised, quickly turns to be a better match than either could have hoped for. But not all is easy for either clan, as some members refuse to believe that the war could end so easily.
[Update: I'm stating here, because some people aren't reading the author note at the beginning, this story was inspired by/based on Amelia Atwater-Rhodes' Hawksong]
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Didn't See That Coming by knittersrevolt (E | 43/43 | 83,838)
Stiles leaves Beacon Hills in the dust after he catches his husband cheating on him.
He finds his way to New York where he starts working for the Hale House Nursery, accidentally adopts a werewolf baby (through no fault of his own thank-you-very-much), and somehow starts training to be an Exorcist Emissary. So, in general, life was going good.
Then he hears that demons have found their way into his hometown. Can he face his inner demons and go back to save the day?
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I know that you love me, even when I lose my head by LunaCanisLupus_22 (E | 13/13 | 135,585)
“We’re not mates, Cora,” he insists. “I mean look at him-“
“Ouch,” the kid says, no longer pushing that shit eating grin.
“He’s- he’s,” Derek tries, at a loss of how to explain why this can’t be possible. Why it shouldn’t be possible.
Or the one where Derek gets attacked by hunters, ends up with amnesia and forgets Stiles is his mate
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Manipulated by DearDaisy (Scribblesnpaws) (M | 30/30 | 221,251)
Nine years ago, Scott kicked Stiles out of the pack. Stiles left and never returned. But now his dad has been hurt, so Stiles returns to take care of him. No one knows the truth of what happened back then, not even Scott or Stiles. But that's about to change.
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literatureloverx · 1 month
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Now i'm curious (from how you considered dazai's openness around chuuya "debatable") about how you consider chuuya and dazai's dynamic? I'm not presuming you think their connection isn't important or anything, or that you think dazai doesn't trust chuuya, but i'm interested in how you think dazai's openness around chuuya is debatable. I'm 50/50 on it too tbh, so maybe your analysis can give more insight :D
Sure, dear, let’s dive into it.❤️ This has become a grand analysis + my comments lmao. I hope you enjoy it!❤️
🩵~~~🩵~~~🩵
First of all, it’s important to note that I personally classify Dazai and Chuuya’s relationship as truly meaningful and admirable—but not in a romantic way.
I want to be clear that I don’t see their dynamic as romantic, which is where I differ from many Dazai x Chuuya shippers. This is exactly why this post will be very, VERY long.
Asagiri himself said that he understands where the Dazai x Chuuya ships are coming from and he definitely gets it, but he won’t make the ship canon because he doesn’t want to dishonour/disrespect the original authors.
So it is indeed very kind of the illustrators and the studio to still provide the fandom with “fan service material,” which is on one hand very thoughtful and kind, but on the other hand fuels toxic shippers and feeds their theories, which they accept as absolute facts. (I suppose they make much money from it no matter what they do, so why would they care, right?)
I’m not trying to demoralize anyone or diminish their character shipping preferences. Everyone is entitled to ship whoever they want, and I don’t want this post to come across as a hate post.
However, I don’t view these dynamics (or any ship in BSD) through rose-colored glasses but rather in a more realistic light.
Many ship blogs tend to romanticize nearly anything that fits their perception (and while I often understand where they’re coming from, I find their interpretations naive compared to other logical explanations), but I want to approach this from a perspective that stays as realistic and logical as possible.
So, I kindly ask those who are sensitive about their own opinions and perceptions to consider skipping this post, as I don’t intend to hurt anyone’s feelings.
A small reminder: you’re allowed to have your ship and preferences, but please don’t act like they are canon or the ultimate truth, or hate on those who don’t share your opinions. This is truly rude and disrespectful.
Wow, that intro was long, but it needed to be said. Now, let’s dive into it:
🩵~~~🩵~~~🩵
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🩵~~~🩵~~~🩵
If we brush off the fan-service material of the scenes in Dead Apple (which we still don’t know if it is canon, and those specific scenes aren’t even incorporated into the light novel, I hear? I’m not sure about it, though; I haven’t read the light novel), what remains?
In my humble opinion, there is a great understanding between the two of them on a humane level, but their dynamic is double-edged.
So why did I consider Dazai’s openness around Chuuya "debatable"?
It starts with Dazai’s perspective. I once saw someone write (sadly, I have no idea where; sorry, I’m not good with past experiences and memories) that “Fyodor understands Dazai but doesn’t get him, and Chuuya gets Dazai but doesn’t understand him.”
I believe this thesis to be entirely true. The problem is that while Chuuya gets Dazai but doesn’t understand him, Dazai gets and understands Chuuya very well.
Let us move over to the 15 manga, if I recall correctly (lmao).
There was a scene where Dazai was ready to sacrifice a whole city just for Chuuya to find out his truth about humanity because it was bothering him on such a deep level.
Dazai could understand his feelings very well because he himself is also struggling with his own humanity.
Their dynamic is so meaningful because they are like two halves of an apple.
Dazai struggles with his humanity because he doesn’t feel human (the true reason behind it remains still unclear), but he is physically human.
Chuuya struggles with his humanity because he is physically inhuman, but he is still human with every fibre of his being.
I believe Dazai can see that as well, which leads him to believe that Chuuya is the most humane person he’s ever known.
This is entirely true. Chuuya embodies almost every aspect of a human so perfectly—with visible flaws (he is so gorgeous to me), emotions, impulses… (this aspect could be a whole other post, but I need to stick to the main point right now).
Does it matter that he is physically inhuman?
No, of course not. What truly matters is the inner persona of someone.
That is the exact aspect Dazai is struggling with. He feels empty, he feels inhuman because he lacks all those aspects Chuuya brims with.
I personally see admiration on Dazai’s part because Chuuya embodies the things he lacks perfectly.
We either admire people who are able to do or have the things we cannot, or we’re simply jealous or hateful. In Dazai’s case, he admires Chuuya; he is flabbergasted.
But wait… hate? How does this manifest in Dazai?
Remember how he said that he’s been trying to find a way to kill Chuuya for the past 7 years?
Well, first of all, I don’t believe he genuinely wants Chuuya dead. However, this statement could indeed be true (with Dazai, you never know if it is), because Chuuya embodies everything he is not.
He might have found solace in simply the imagination of getting rid of him, not truly trying to make it a reality. Because we all know—if Dazai wanted to, he would have.
The reason why he doesn’t want Chuuya truly dead? Well, isn’t it obvious? I believe from the bottom of my heart that he cherishes Chuuya. But not in a romantic way, because in the canon context, there is really no evidence of that.
You can find so many clues that suggest their bond is deep, heartfelt, and close. It is so beautiful, truly. Their bond is one of my personal favorites of all BSD relationships.
But the romantic side of it? There truly is none.
This is the common problem here. Just because their bond is very meaningful and deep, people find every opportunity and reason to make a romantic relationship out of those things because we sadly live in a world where meaningful relationships are not appreciated at all but simply put in a box called “romantic & sexual tension” (there speaks the INFJ). Most relationships are multifaceted, people.
However, I’m babbling too much. Let’s dive into Chuuya’s perspective:
Chuuya seems to be more aggressive towards Dazai, clearly and often declaring that he “hates” him. Does he now?
No. I don’t believe that he does.
I believe that he sees through Dazai’s antics and his void of self, which makes me think that he is rather feeling bad for him (compassionately). I know that Chuuya doesn’t seem to be the most empathetic person in all Bungo Stray Dogs universe, but I believe that he actually is quite empathetic; he just doesn’t show it much.
He tolerates Dazai’s unsettling aspects most of the time, even though he is short-tempered.
Speaking of him being short-tempered, this side of him shines even brighter at Dazai’s side. He is much calmer and composed around others.
I believe that this is: first, because he trusts Dazai that he has everything in control so that he can act more freely; second, that Dazai knows exactly how to push him into irritation, which makes him aggressive quite rashly.
I said this before when I described Chuuya’s ideal type, and I’ll say it again: Chuuya doesn’t hate Dazai, but rather the challenges he provides that unsettle him deeply.
Now, I’d like to point out another example: Remember when Chuuya hit Dazai, and Dazai said to him that it hurt and he is only a human too? Chuuya answers coldly, “no one would believe that” (again the 15 manga, I believe?).
This is the solace Dazai seeks from Chuuya. He helps Chuuya to see that he is indeed human and expects the same in return from him, which Chuuya doesn’t provide.
Chuuya, someone Dazai sees as the picture-perfect human, denies him his own humanity. That must hurt really, really bad.
This is exactly what I mean with “Chuuya gets Dazai but doesn’t understand him, while Dazai gets and understands Chuuya.”
Chuuya is unable to provide Dazai with solace because he is so fixed on his worry about the other people dying and struggling that he is unable to see that he hurts Dazai.
Which is ironic because not seeing what is in front of him is again, very Chuuya-like and very humane, after all.
We’re human; we may be impulsive, we make mistakes, we might hurt our friends and families.
And Dazai again is looming in shadows, lying almost dead on the sofa without a care how many people will die, which is again, very inhuman.
So, let me bring in another aspect:
Why did Dazai install a bomb in Chuuya’s car before he left the Port Mafia?
I believe it was his coping mechanism, as always. His cheerful, uncaring attitude he wears like a mask, his desperate attempt to show Chuuya he would’ve loved to get rid of him, but sadly he was lucky—once again. That stupid slug.
Chuuya is someone who Dazai cherishes, maybe not as much as Odasaku or even Atsushi, but he cares deeply for him. (This is initially why I thought that Dazai has a heart of gold, because he is able to cherish so many people so very deeply, and he himself isn’t even really aware of it, which is adorable to me.)
I read somewhere that those two are soulmates, and I believe that to be true also, but as I already said—not in a romantic or sexual way.
Remember when I said that I adore soulmate connections, not only the romantic ones but also the platonic ones? The relationship between Dazai and Chuuya seems to be exactly that to me. I love them and I love them as a duo as well.
So, as an addition, I’d like to speak about their unwavering trust in each other, which is one of the main aspects of their relationship and dynamic. Dazai trusts Chuuya because he knows that Chuuya understands his trust and has already plotted the entire situation with no errors whatsoever. Chuuya needs to play his part in order for Dazai’s plan to work out as intended.
The reason Dazai trusts Chuuya is quite simple: Chuuya is a truly trustworthy person. To work as partners, they need to establish a strong sense of trust, which plays out perfectly. They are both able to forget their quarrels and focus on the job at hand, making them unstoppable together. Chuuya is known for his loyalty; it is his most prominent personality trait. That is why Dazai trusts him so much, knowing that Chuuya also trusts him because he understands that Dazai never fails.
To Chuuya, Dazai is nothing short of a genius—a very strange one, that much is sure. He is well aware that Dazai is depressed and lacks many of the qualities Chuuya possesses naturally, but he doesn’t really judge him for it, as seen in his high tolerance for Dazai’s antics and childish manner.
In summary, their bond is truly admirable, deep, and very important. Please don’t diminish it by confining their relationship to a box of sexual and romantic feelings in a canon sense, as this simply cheapens their dynamic.
Create your ships, write your fanfictions, but please don’t be rude to others who don’t share your perspectives. It’s absolutely fine to disagree with my opinion and interpretation, but please be respectful to me and my dear followers.❤️
Reminder: Chuuya calls Dazai “Dazai”, just like the ADA members, which is his surname. This suggests distance. Dazai calls Chuuya not “Nakahara” which also would be his surname, but “Chuuya”, his given name, which suggests that he might disrespect Chuuya or not take him seriously, since Chuuya is actually older than Dazai. I’m not sure what to think about this fact, so I wanted to mention it but I had no idea what analysis I can make out of this.
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obsessivevoidkitten · 2 years
Text
A Canine and His Cat
Yandere Male Dog Hybrid x Feminized Male Cat Hybrid Reader (CW: Noncon, male reader, feminization, rimjob, scent kink, non-human genitals, stalking, kidnapping, pissmarking (the reader is not scent marked just a building), bullying, general yandere behavior, heat cycles but not a/b/o and no mpreg)  Word Count: 3.1k (I wrote this between the hours of 11pm and 7am, not beta read, I proofread this to the best of my ability but I am sleepy and dizzy, please excuse any errors, I hope you guys enjoy this and I am sorry for two dog men in a row, but I had the idea of a dog man bully and a cat man victim and had to write it up immediately. Also I purposefully left the yandere’s description vague because I want readers to imagine him however they want, and I thought if he ever gets fanart it would be fun to see what subspecies of dog hybrid readers see him as.) 
 You did not know why Shale insisted on being so mean to you, he had targeted you from the moment you had first met in college, he was a junior at the time and you had been a sophomore but you still shared a few classes. And he made those classes miserable.  At first you just assumed it was because he was a dog hybrid and you were a cat hybrid, and sometimes there was an instinctual animosity between certain hybrids, but that theory was quickly discredited when you noticed that he was nothing but civil with all the other members of your subspecies.  Whatever the reason for his personal vendetta against you it would not be a problem for too much longer, the end of the year was now approaching and he was now a senior. Which meant you would only have to keep your head down and avoid the brute for a little longer before he graduated and you would never have to see him or deal with any of his bullshit ever again. It was a happy thought.  You had thought your years in university would have been relatively fun, meeting people with new interests, getting to know other students in your field, and taking part in new clubs and hobbies. But for over a year now it seemed that all of your friendships had simply fallen off and faded away, all your applications into clubs were denied, and no one wanted to be associated with you.  The conclusion you came to was that no one wanted to be associated with someone who had drawn the ire of the star basketball player. And while that was part of it the reality was even worse, Shale was using his connections and influence to make sure no club would accept you and he subtly threatened anyone who even seemed like they were starting a friendship with you.  It was not just that people wanted to avoid someone being bullied by him, it was that he was actively ruining your social life. Shale didn’t know why, at first, but he really needed you to be completely disconnected from everyone and everything. After months of tormenting you he realized that wasn’t strictly true, he just needed you completely disconnected from everyone and everything that wasn’t him.  He was going to break you down until you were a lonely little mess that needed him to come in and clean you up. Over the course of your sophomore and junior years he just could not help himself, and he had no desire to either.  Shale never missed a chance to make fun of you in class, and sometimes he made you do his homework. But the most infuriating thing he did was sometimes leave one of his jerseys or jocks in your locker, typically when they were ripe with sweat after he won a big game. How did he even get them in!? You could tell by scent that it was him, but even if you couldn’t he would always remark to you that you shouldn’t throw away his “gift” because once he went pro it would be the most valuable thing you ever owned. Ugh, the arrogance, it made your fur bristle.  And since you lived alone in an extra small apartment reserved for hybrid students that had to deal with heats, as even male cat hybrids did, singling you out outside of classes was all too easy for your tormentor. The infuriating dog man left mocking notes on your door, sometimes he waited in front of your place just to make fun of you directly, and he even fucking piss marked around the entire outside of the building as if it was his property! You could tell immediately who it was by the acrid stench in your sensitive nose.  Of course you filed complaint after complaint, but the college did absolutely nothing, even implying that you were making it up for attention. Of course they did, what did you expect, he was a star athlete that brought them a ton of profit and prestige. Why would they take any action to ruin that just to make one little cat hybrid safe?  At any rate your plan to avoid him and keep to yourself was at least partially working, it helped that you only had one class with him this term, but you interacting with him less made him decide that he needed to escalate things. During your next lab assignment he made SURE that you would have to be partnered with him.  Your class was dismissed and told to find someone to work on an anatomy project with. You had to pick a subject to study, go into great detail about a specific part of its anatomy and physiology, and explain how and why it had evolved that way.  You looked desperately around the large room for any other free classmate, a lifeboat in the rising tide of dread, but everyone else was already partnered up. All you found was Shale looking at you with his trademark smirk.  “Hey, bet you love this chance to hang out with me, don’t you loser?”  The way he looked at you with those red eyes of his made you want to scratch up his face.  “Yeah, it’s my life’s dream to be subjected to more of your bullshit,” you quipped dryly. “I just want to get this over with, when do you want to work on it?”  “Yeah, whatever, I can come by in a couple hours after practice.” He gathered his materials and went on his way. You knew this would be hell for you. But you had no idea how bad things were about to get for you.  Shale had executed his plan well, he could smell you just starting to enter your heat cycle and he knew you would be slightly more vulnerable during this time period. You were not worried about working on the project tonight though because it was only just starting to happen and you would not have to even miss any classes except for a couple days when it was most intense.  You tidied up your tiny apartment and waited for Blockhead to show up, when he did you opened the door and greeted him with all of the enthusiasm of a kid going to the dentist, and let him in. You could immediately tell by his smell that he had not showered after his practice.  “Jeez, why so cold, girly?” He smirked and looked at you with those red eyes of his, happy knowing he got the reaction he wanted as your ears moved back and you shot him a glare.  That was one of your biggest pet peeves and Shale had sniffed it out like the dog he was, despite very clearly being male he always called you a girl. Sure, you were not really strong or masculine, but you definitely did not appear to be a female either.  “I swear to god! Can we please just do this assignment!? Five seconds here and I am already sick of you.” You growled a bit to emphasize you were not happy.  “Damn, fine, you’re really feisty today princess’” You grumbled under your breath as you both took a seat at the table sitting beside one another and got out your laptops to type and research on. “What do you want to do our assignment on?” You asked, not looking up from your laptop.  “Well, I wanna do our assignment on a cute kitty girl’s heat and see if a dog man can make it progress faster!” He looked at you suggestively. “Wh-what!? Uh… how would we even do that? I don’t think I want to do a project on th-”  He interrupted your sputtering reply by rubbing his strong hand up your thigh, your face turned beet red and it took you a moment to come to your senses and swat his hand away.  “I know it takes three days for your cycle to start fully, I can always smell it on you even before it really begins, come on kitten, let’s see if we can jump start it~” He reached for you but you pulled away and got out of your chair.  “I-i’m not a cat girl! I am a man, I cannot even have kids! Uh, so we can’t do that project! St-stay away from me!” You backed up until you were up against the wall and you tossed a small vase with a plant in his direction.  He caught it and put it down and chuckled as he stepped forward, “Hey, don’t put yourself down, have you ever tried making babies? We can try real hard right now if you want to~ Even if you can’t there are plenty of women who can’t get knocked up!”  “Uh, I have a dick! I really don’t think trying to get knocked up will help…” You ran and dove past him and made it to the door but he caught you by the legs and carried you to your bed as you kicked and screamed.  “Come on, there's no harm in just trying~ And that’s kinda transphobic baby girl, plenty of girls have dicks. I bet yours is reeeeeally cute~” In Shale’s mind you had to be a girl, because he was so attracted to everything about you from your feisty attitude, to your cute cat ears and tail, even your lovely smell, and he was not attracted to men. So that must mean you were a girl.  You swiped at him with your claws extended, but he easily dodged the swipes then caught your wrists and held them over your head with one hand. The other hand stroked your face tenderly before softly touching your furry ears.  “So soft~ I always knew they would be!” His tail wagged happily as you wiggled and writhed beneath him. “You really need to calm down kitten, because I really want an A+ on this assignment, let’s see if we can get your heat started and whether or not we can grow some pups in that tummy.”  You began screaming and shrieking as loudly as you could before Shale took a shirt that had been lying on your bed and used it to gag you completely. Then he took his pants off and used them to tie your arms up behind your head after he removed your shirt.  Now you could only kick, but after he pulled off your pants and underwear he used more clothing to tie your legs to the bed posts.  “I was right! Your little cock is fucking adorable~” He leaned down and kissed the tip before climbing on top of you and sniffing you thoroughly. His eager nose probed from your underarms to your neck.  “Fuck, you smell so good, you have no idea how long I wanted to enjoy your scent up close.” You tried growling and wiggling in response but he just chuckled, “Haha, are you that needy to have my cock in you? Be patient, I'll get to it!”  You just struggled harder in response, you did not want his dick in you!  Shale got between your legs and stroked your cock a couple times while licking your nuts before putting your entire dick in his mouth and sucking it like it was the most delicious thing in the world. He went back and forth a while between sucking your cock and licking and kissing your balls.  You could not help but to instinctively thrust your hips towards his warm mouth, though you still did not want this by any means. Though Shale definitely took it as a sign that you were starting to become more willing.  Shale decided that before he tried his best to fill you up full of babies he needed to prep you. So he stayed between your legs and started lapping his eager tongue all over your hole. You squirmed in a mix of defiance and pleasure as his talented tongue lapped deeply at your inner walls. He finished by kissing your hole before spitting on it to make sure it was extra wet and ready for his cock.  The horny dog hybrid removed his underwear and you saw his cock bounce free, it was big, red, slimy, and completely unsheathed. He placed the tapered tip at your hole and slowly slid himself inside you, instantly rubbing your prostate and making you jerk and moan in pleasure through the gag.  Shale wanted to hear your moans for himself and he was sure he had jump-started your heat, judging from how warm your insides had gotten and how you had started twitching with pleasure and letting out muffled moans and gasps.  Even if he did not have any of those cues to go off of he could certainly smell that your cycle had rapidly reached a crescendo under his ministrations. He was correct in his prediction that you would not try to scream anymore, it felt so nice to have a cock in you during your heat.  It was by far the most amazing thing you had ever experienced and it was just too easy to succumb to the pleasure Shale was causing you.  As he continued to lose himself in the sensation of your hot insides his knot swole up and tied the two of you together, you were stretched well enough to accommodate it without any pain, but when it rubbed against that special sensitive spot inside of you you saw stars and came all over your belly with a loud moan.  He could feel your entire body shudder around his cock as he kept plowing deeply into your tight ass. You looked up at him with a pouting expression.  “Please let my hands go!” You seemed like you were about to cry and he trusted at this point that you wouldn’t try anything so he untied your arms and you immediately threw your arms around him and clung tightly to him.  Shale managed to then free your legs too and you automatically wrapped your legs around him, your whole body clinging to his as he picked you up and kept breeding you. You were already hard again as Shale battered your prostate. You were drooling and whining in his arms, desperate for another release, as he bit your neck possessively and left his mark there. You could feel his cock quiver as it started shooting thick cum and filled up your insides.
 "Fuck babe, your pussy is amazing, you really thought you weren't a girl when you have a cunt like this?"  Shale sat down with you on the bed, he knew his kitten needed to cum again so he gently rocked his knot back and forth with slow deliberate thrusts inside you while massaging your balls until you hit your second climax.  You were suddenly so tired, it was as if the energy expended during your previous struggles, your rapid progression through your heat cycle, being fucked into oblivion, and cumming so hard was all hitting you at once.  Your lover could see how tired his girl was so he held the back of your head and nestled it into his strong chest until you fell asleep while he waited for his knot to deflate. His heart melted as you began purring while snuggling up to him and he knew that what he was about to do was the right thing.  When you woke up the first thing you noticed was that you were burning up and aroused, right in the middle of your heat. The second thing you noticed was that you were no longer in your apartment, you were on a strange bed in a strange room. Shale must have cleaned you up because there was no trace left on your body of what had happened before you went to sleep.  You noticed that you had been dressed in a short skirt and thigh high stockings and there was a collar on your neck with a little bell on it. It felt like it was made of leather but it was something much more durable and you had no hope of removing it.  When you got out of the bed to look around at your strange surroundings you noticed it was tied to a long cord, it was long enough to let you move about the room, and get to the adjoining room which appeared to be a bathroom, but you could not get near the door.  In the corner of the room you noticed something unsettling, it looked like someone had made a shrine to you, it was covered in really odd photos you had certainly not taken yourself and laid out in front of the photos were some of your personal things. A brush that had gone missing from your apartment, a pair of underwear, some pages from assignments Shale had made you do for him, and a poem you had written that should have been in one of your journals that you liked to write in.  The implication of what someone had to do to get all those things made you uneasy.  You jumped back in fright as you heard someone unlatch the door. Shale walked in with a great big grin on his face.  “Sorry I was late, baby girl, but I had a morning class today!” He came over to you acting as if absolutely nothing was out of place. Like he had not just kidnapped you after fucking you silly.  “What the fuck!? You can’t just keep me here!” You hissed and swiped at him again.  “Awe, calm down kitten, no need to get all angry. It’s just that I am graduating soon and I could not have my girlfriend leaving me so I bought this house with my signing bonus! You can stay here while I finish up classes and after that I will only be gone to do practices and games.” He pulled you close and kissed your forehead.  “If you behave you can even come with me to those too and we never have to be apart. But this cord is staying on until I am sure you will be good to make sure you don’t try to run off.” His tail started wagging at the thought of always having you there with him, his own personal cheerleader spurring him on during every game and practice.  “What about my classes!?” You looked at him with dismay, he was serious, he was really going to keep you here.  “Don’t worry your pretty little head, you don’t need to work, you’ll be my housewife! Now let’s get you to the bed, I can smell that you’re still in heat and I want to make sure your urges are all taken care of.”  With a defeated sigh you let him take you by the hand and lead you to the bed, there was no way you could escape him, so you might as well make the most of it.
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intersectionalpraxis · 9 months
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I just emailed the United Nations Women's Office in Geneva, Amnesty International, Oxfam Canada, and Doctors Without Borders (MSF) about the lack of period care in Gaza. It is frustrating to see that international organizations have not set up a fund specifically to help Palestinian people who need this. Having one resource to help with this shortage, Motherbeing, is not enough for millions of people.
Period care is health care. I don't want anyone to tell me that emailing international organizations about this is either silly or not important because not having adequate access to this can cause serious health ramifications -from infections to illnesses and later reproductive health issues.
Pregnant women in Gaza are also continually suffering right now -of the thousands of women that were supposed to give birth over these past few months -they have not had safe and consistent access to care during their trimesters. I have spoken about this before -but we need to keep amplifying this issue as well.
Women's health in Gaza has been under under crisis for a while now, and we KNOW this is part of a zionist's larger agenda -to attack women and children especially because they see them as some of the greatest threats. So please do what you can -send those emails, call your representatives/MP's and demand a ceasefire. Demand more than adequate medical care -which includes period care -reach those in Gaza who need it.
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Original post where Hind Khoudary is reporting:
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To say I'm bitter-sweetly fortunate my TL has been full of feminists talking about Palestine -while at the same time I have seen a plethora publicly turn away, ignore, or remain silent on it because of money or greed or worry about their social or financial capital (celebrities and 'influencers' -we know who you are) -I'm just embarrassed for them.
When I first started my journey into feminism as a first year well over a decade ago (and as someone who used to be ignorant about so many things until I started my process of learning/unlearning/educating myself) -I am resoundingly grateful for that beginning. Being able dig into intersectional theory, listening to activists from all around the world about their struggles, passions, and efforts to liberation -and I still continue to do so.
Reading about the importance of decolonization in tandem with dismantling the heteropatriarchal capitalist machine -I always know the importance of solidarity and ally ship as a result of years of study -because the power IS with the people -and our voices do matter -the system, time and again, wants you to believe you don't. And for those feminists who aren't using their platforms or voices to encourage and demand a ceasefire -or any and all ends of systemic oppression -you have blood on your hands. Feminist and women's movements aren't meant to be something you cherry pick.
So do the bare minimum, or don't call yourselves feminists.
I also don't have a 'template' per-say, since I just wrote them out individually and edited them, but if anyone wants to me post something generic so they can make their own to send to these organizations please let me know.
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red-might-be-dead · 6 months
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hello hi here to force strange thoughts into your brain once again, this time about jrwi (wow who could’ve guessed)
been thinking about this for a little but it’s basically what i think some campaigns would be if not podcasts, i haven’t listened to some of the older ones so i’m sorry they’re not on here :(( if you have any ideas feel free to add them btw :DD
RIPTIDE!!!!! - really long animated series
not an anime though, no matter how much grizzly wants it, it would be an animation style where the characters could have very clearly different nose, face and body shapes, really pushing my riptide nose agenda here sorry, each episode would be like 20-40 minutes long and instead of coming out in seasons there would be massive gaps in between episodes, from 2-6 months long, to leave time for writers and animators to get stuff done (massive team of animators btw, i feel like it would be pretty successful)
PRIME DEFENDERS!! - comics
literally nothing else they could be, just really well made, well performing comics (i’ve already talked about this before you can stalk my talk tag if you really want to find it lmao), the comic company making them would be keeping well away from movies n shit btw
APOTHEOSIS!!! - i wasn’t really sure about this one to be honest
i had to ask my friend and she said anime which i don’t agree with but i can see it, i think maybe a short book series where each book is 150 - 300 pages and is about a different god they have to kill/a different episode, i think that works but if anyone has any better ideas please tell me :D!!
BLOOD IN THE BAYOU!!! - i hate to say it, i really do…
bitb would be a really long really good 80s horror book with strong homoerotic undertones, a satisfied fanbase and lots of active members in the community making fan comics, films, writing, theories and art ect… until well after the book came out……….. and then it would be made into the most egregious and awful live action movie you have ever seen, the most awful casting (like chris pratt as officer dudes….. throws up) and even worse sfx, oh yeah and the characters would be ruined and the story would become so butchered it wouldn’t make sense, they would do some shit like cut out becky so kian just kisses some random lady (removing both a really good and well written character and a layer of kian’s character that i think is super important) and make rolan really be an evil bug spy the whole time so rand has to kill him to save the town also add in a whole new sub plot that never existed like the rand family is secretly a long line of bug alien hunters or something fucking stupid like that and the entire fanbase would murder whoever thought re-writing the story was a good idea (ahaha can you tell ive been through something like this before ahahaha, character morals and motives being removed and whatnot ahahahhahahaha.)
anyways………
THE SUCKENING!!! - live action series
it would be well made though, unlike the bitb movie it would be its own original thing, have great makeup and effects also be well casted and well shot, well written, ect ect, it would bloody and gory and not suitable for people who can’t handle showing bones and organs all over everywhere, lots of shitty rip off merch would be made though and the fandom would be 99% gay little freaks (normal suckening enjoyers) and 1% homophobic straight white men who get mad whenever they see soda and emizel having gay sex on screen or whatever fag shit that biting thing was
again feel free to add your thoughts and ideas and shit in the reblogs it would be nice to read them :DD!!
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bitterbutblue · 1 month
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loser zhu yuan thoughts..
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but that's illegal-! ☆ zhu yuan headcanons
~ guys shes so loser coded please hear me out please peaselapelapslepfkgsfjhkld i need her to hug me rn it would fix me methinks ~
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⤷ if ANYONE fucking quotes her fucking pubsec ad to her she will immediately turn red and start screaming internally. if it is a good friend and they are in a private setting she will start screaming OUT LOUD.
⤷ genuinely a massive loser. secretly adores all sorts of stupid cop movies where they seem so badass and cool...
⤷ huge fan of action movies and picked up all sorts of martial arts when she was younger because she thought they were so cool
⤷ hates cats for the dumbest reasons but she secretly has an axolotl in her house that she cares for a lot beacuse she thinks they are silly little creatures
⤷ has a consensual workplace relationship with qingyi probably. qingyi is the 'excuse me she asked for no pickles' and zhu yuan is hiding behind her with a goofy, shy smile on her face
⤷ qingyi and her had the most awkward relationship at first because qingyi doesn't know how to emote and zhu yuan is a LAME LOSER who LOSES (doesn't know how to initiate anything)
⤷ every time there is a cat case she tries to push it to qingyi but qingyi is insistent on her getting over her hatred of cats and their fur..
⤷ she is that officer that everyone admires because she's so put together can do almost anything but god that entire extroverted, socially aware self collapses sthe second she gets embarrassed or shy
⤷ she gets embarrassed so easily... also turns red really easily. first time qingyi held her hand in public she turned so red qingyi thought she was having a fever
⤷ don't even get me started on their first kiss. she started giggling to herself and then got so mortified she tried to run away and qingyi just laughed at her (while falling more in love)
⤷ insanely good chef. cooks with the vegetables she grows in her own garden and loves to feed the community! is that person who invites random neighbours over to eat meals!
⤷ insecure about her body but we all know she is probably toned as shit with a solid six pack abs that qingyi has qingyi malfunctioning. she doesn't get what's so attractive about her body and often puts herself down but qingyi is straight up overheating and blue screening at the sight of zhu yuan.
⤷ can ramble on forever about stuff she likes. indulges in fan theories about her favourite movies and is secretly a fanfiction reader. will stay up to 2 in the morning on weekend nights to read fanfiction instead of going out for drinks or stuff
⤷ a super sheltered kid growing up so... she really doesn't know much about romance or sex. like that time she accidentally watched porn with belle... didn't think it was odd to watch it with a friend, rather thought it was odd people would watch that stuff PERIOD.
⤷ the most loving person anyone will ever meet. once they get past her initial officer facade, they're greeted with this dorky loser officer who just wants to talk to you about your day.
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There's been a lot of "this character is so selfish" (mostly about Ray, but I already tried about that), and like. That's the point.
They're all selfish in their own way.
They're 22, they're all financially comfortable, they're emotionally illiterate.
Cheum and Mew have cast themselves as superior to the rest of their friends, and treat them all accordingly.
Cheum sees herself as a good friend, as a caretaker, as the one with their shit together; the rest of them are useless fuck ups. She can't even not complain about April-- who is basically perfect, because April wants validation for her movies, and Cheum doesn't get them, so she's annoyed at having to watch. She's constantly talking shit about her friends.
Mew thinks his not chasing sex and relationships makes him superior to his friends. He introduced them all in unflattering ways, while holding himself above them. He doesn't really see them as people, they're characters in his life, and that means he can't see them for who they are. And all this is before his revenge fantasy kicked off and he actively manipulated and used Ray.
Ray's addiction makes him selfish. He wants to be loved so he goes where he thinks he'll get it, even if it's not good for him. When you spend so much of your time trying to numb yourself, it's hard to see anything beyond that. He's still generous with his care and his money, but he doesn't share a lot of himself with most people in his life.
Sand let his need for revenge on Top drive him to do something that he knew would hurt Ray, and used Ray's feelings against him to do it. He lied to Nick and went through his phone.
Boston can't see much beyond his dick, and where his next orgasm is coming from, and even though he isn't particularly fond of anyone in his friend group, he plays the part while purposely doing things to hurt and work against them. He uses Nick's feelings to string him along so he has someone who will provide all the trappings of a relationship without having to commit to someone.
Nick went through Boston's phone multiple times, including before they knew each other for jerk off material. He was so focused on getting Boston to be his that he recorded him and Top, and then told Sand about it, which led to that whole confrontation -- Nick knew about Sand and Ray, and about Ray knowing Boston and Mew at this point, he had to know that that wasn't staying secret. Also, I think it's possible-to-likely that Nick is at least subconsciously manipulating Boston into moving his commitment line every time Nick mentions he might start seeing other people (a friend read this theory and I'm obsessed with it, going to rewatch with this in mind. If you're op of this idea, please lmk!)
Top... Top let petty jealousy over something that Boston-- who he doesn't trust -- told him happened convince him that having sex with Boston again was fine. And then he lied about it, and he consistently used the same "I win you lose" type of language about Mew that Boston does. (I know Top feels bad now, but I don't think he really realized that he loved Mew until Mew dumped him)
They're all dicks in certain ways and circumstances. They're all selfish and self involved and messy.
That's the show, friends. None of your faves are unproblematic. They've all got something that makes them sympathetic to varying degrees, too, but this is about a group of messy bitches who are struggling to keep themselves together, and to hold onto what appear to be the only relationships any of them have without destroying each other (which means lying, or hiding, or ignoring important things).
This is literally just a group of college kids, y'all. And they're here to hurt our feelings and entertain us.
(And maybe let's especially stop calling out the addict with mental health issues for being irredeemable and bad, eh?)
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Unwanted Attention [Hotch x Reader]
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Prompt: Having to travel to the middle of nowhere Ohio for a serial killer was bad enough, add to the fact that the local LEOs are looking a little too hard at JJ, Emily, and _y/n_ was seriously testing Aaron’s resolve. Lots of protective Hotch here! This is another @imagining-in-the-margins inspired fic for her Meet Cute Writing Challenge. I’m using the dialogue prompt: “Watch where you’re going!” “… You ran into me?!”
Category: Angst/comfort - (mostly comfort I think).
Word Count: 5.8K
Content Warnings: Canon typical violence (serial killer - kills via strangulation but nothing explicit) unwanted physical touch (groping of the behind and pubic area) misogyny, sexism, the U.S. police, language, brief mention of intimacy. 
A/N: Hi friends! I am very pleased with this one. I love writing Hotch with righteous anger. It just looks too damn good on him. I also love the duality of this man because one moment he is ready to bite someone’s head off and the next he only has eyes for you and he’s checking in and feeling guilty. You could read this story as a standalone or as a prequel to my story, Life can be Terrible, but At Least You're In It. (linked). I want to shout out @criminalskies for hyping me up while writing this. Last, if you enjoyed reading this, likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated! - Levi 
List with all stories 
y/n = your name 
_f/c_ = favorite color 
_l/n_ = your last name
_y/h/c_ = yuur hair color 
Walnut Creek Ohio, who on the team had heard of it? Well apart from Spencer, because apparently he’d read a United States Atlas Map one night when his insomnia was bothering him, and he had retained all the information about nearly every tiny town that existed in the States. Spencer was rambling off facts about the tiny town stating, “There are 908 residents in the town as of 2017. It’s shocking that a serial killer would target such a small community where everyone has to know everyone else.” y/n, JJ, and Reid were all at the coffee station filling up cups. y/n pulled out her _f/c_ thermos. She always made sure that anyone who wanted coffee got to go first because her reusable metal container took about half the pot. y/n had finally wisened up after Emily and Spencer kept complaining about the coffee getting lukewarm, or worse, cold while sitting on the plane. Now her coffee stayed hot for hours if need be. She had bought the teammates that relied as heavily on caffeine as she did as Holiday or birthday gifts and the thermoses were stored away in one of her closets of her apartment, ready to be taken out and wrapped at the right moment. Spencer’s comment pulled her back to the present moments and she replied, “Nothing can stop a person going bad I guess. Not even a small town.” This stopped Spencer's comments on the location of the team's most recent case, and he shifted gears to talk about the psychological development of those raised in rural environments versus those raised in urban areas. y/n continued to listen to Spencer as he spoke, even if she couldn’t always keep up with his mile-a-minute commentary. She listened because Reid was a fount of knowledge and often a comment he made and maybe didn’t even remember would be helpful later on in the case. She also listened because sometimes the other members of the team didn’t when he spoke. It wasn’t that they didn’t think that what he was saying was important, it was just that they were trying to come up with their own thoughts and theories about the case. y/n was also guilty of tuning Reid out sometimes, but when she could listen to him, she did. 
y/n had always been more of a listener than one to contribute to the conversation early on. y/n felt better about talking once she had more information and that normally wasn’t until the team arrived at the case's location or even saw the first crime scene. Once y/n had the bigger picture, she was ready and able to hope in and give her thoughts. Before that time came, she would listen and think about her prior knowledge. Although it might be less exciting than guessing and formulating theories, she found that often some basic information or past cases or criminals was useful when leads dropped or the case seemed to go cold. In her process, she was thinking about the future. As she had integrated into the team full-time at the beginning, Derek teased her for writing so much down in a notebook. She highlighted any relevant information the team stated or facts that seemed relevant. Morgan had joked in good humor but as the first few cases came to a close, the whole team slowly realized that she was approaching these cases from another angle, one that proved to be highly valuable at important points.  
y/n settled next to Emily at her desk and pulled her go bag from underneath the space. The sound of Aaron’s door closing caught y/n’s attention. He was wearing that maroon tie she liked so much. She hadn’t told him that yet, it felt too trivial, but she really liked that tie on him. Aaron caught her eye for a moment and there was a small twinge in her chest before they quickly, discreetly looked away. Nobody knew that they were spending time together outside of work. They had to be discreet because it was mixing work and pleasure and in a place like the FBI, that didn’t just fly. y/n was sure Hotch knew everything about the rules and consequences of breaking those rules, but he hadn’t filled her in on those details. She had looked at the employee handbook but it was all legalese and it hurt her head. If she and Aaron did become more serious, and committed, she would ask him to interpret the confusing language for her. Thankfully they weren’t having a hard time keeping their work and private lives separate, yet. 
Aaron felt the normal thrill of heading out to a new case. He considered the word, ‘thrill,’ thinking it wasn’t the perfect synonym for the arrival of yet another slew of murders, but it certainly wasn’t excitement either. Excitement meant something happy, something to look forward to. ‘Energized,’ his brain offered. Mentally Aaron nodded along, That would work for now. He had to be energized for this work. He wasn’t a young man anymore but there had to be a strength and calmness with him. He was the leader and even with Rossi being on the team for over a year, his agents still looked to him to make this all work. His eyes found y/n’s and there he found the look of thrill. This was still so new to her, even though she had been on the team for a while. He looked away as always, not giving into any desires that lingered when he was paying attention to his newest agent. He was grateful that y/n was professional and polite and had the utmost decorum even though outside of work they hadn’t been entirely professional. The thought of their last non-work meeting at her apartment and her heavy breathing and soft sounds on her lips, as he worked over her clothed body with his hands brought a momentatry flush to his face. 
Hotch sobered as quickly as he had flushed as Dave came up beside him and said, “You ready for this?” Aaron looked over to his friend and bluntly replied, “As ready as possible, but it's still never easy.” Rossi nodded along as they both moved down the stairs and toward the parking lot. This line of work wasn’t easy. Aaron knew that every time his team left for a new case there was a chance that someone might get hurt, or even killed and no matter how good everyone was at their job, that possibility still worried him. y/n’s face popped up in his mind as he found his seat in the jet and he pushed away the thought. His relationship with her had shifted to something he wasn’t entirely sure he had under control. They hadn’t made anything official and hadn’t even said, “I love you,” yet. However, Hotch wasn’t a man who moved quickly, but as long as he and y/n had an open, honest conversation about where their feelings were headed, he wasn’t going to fight it. He had fought so many things, and people in his life that he didn’t have the desire to fight this too. Being around y/n felt good. It felt safe and he rarely got that in his life, so he was embracing it where he could. As JJ went over more of the facts and details regarding the case involving a serial killer wreaking havoc in the tiny town in Ohio, he shifted his full attention to what his media liaison was saying. 
As the jet landed on the tiny airstrip, everyone got out and into the waiting SUVs. Aaron drove with Emily, Spencer, and JJ while Rossi took y/n and Derek. Spencer and Emily were discussing the need to work well with the law enforcement in the town as they were likely ingratiate into all aspects of the community. Meanwhile, JJ was preparing a statement for the media. In the other car, Derek turned from the front seat and asked, “So what are we thinking in terms of prior knowledge _y/n_?” y/n turned her gaze to Morgan’s and said, “Well strangulation is such a common signature that we’re going to have to look for something more specific to get traction here. The photos do look like this guy is strangling people from behind and the unsubs killing fit men someone who doesn't want to face what they’re really doing? Or it could be that they despise their victims so much they can’t stand to see them again, even while killing them?” Morgan nodded and elaborated on the idea that the killer might see these men as a competition of some kind. As having something the unsub lacked. This information allowed those in Rossi’s car to start to form a physical profile of the unsub. As the team made it to the small local police station, everyone got out of the parked cars and a man who appeared to be in his fifties who was balding badly came out to greet them. 
Aaron stepped forward and extended his hand. The man took it and gave it a firm shake, saying, “I’m Officer Bronson. Thank you so much for you folks from coming out here.” Aaron nodded, replying, “I’m Agent, Hotchner and this is my team.” He indicated to the team, quickly introducing them. First, he gestured to JJ stating, “This is our media liaison, Jennifer Jareau.” JJ stepped forward and took the man’s slightly sweaty hand. Aaron moved through the rest of the team quickly, wanting to get the introductions over with and the real work started. He motioned to each of his agents saying, “This is David Rossi, Derek Morgan, Dr. Spencer Reid, _y/n_ _l/n_, and Emily Prentiss.” Each member nodded as Hotch said their name and Officer Bronson replied, Well welcome to Walnut Creek. I wish it was under happier circumstances. I’ll let you all get inside and out of this heat.” As the team moved into the small building, Aaron asked, “Is there a space where we can get organized and look at the evidence more easily?” Bronson nodded and led the team to a table at the back of a very small station and said, “Sorry it’s nothing fancy. I’ll have someone clean off the files and stuff off for you.” The man turned and semi-shouted, “Anderson, can you clear your junk off this table?” Anderson, a thirty-something-year-old moved around the team and got his things saying, “Sorry Chief.” Bronson looked to Aaron, almost for approval, and asked, “Will this do?” To which Hotch simply replied, “It’s fine.” 
As the team settled a little y/n looked at JJ with a ‘Are you kidding me?’ expression and then looked at Anderson who was placing his numerous files on another table. JJ rolled her eyes in return. The fact that one of the officers had open files possibly containing sensitive or private data out on a table for anyone in the room to see displayed the station's lack of professionalism. The team worked up a preliminary profile and Aaron told Officer Bronson that they were ready to address his unit. Bronson called his team to the side of the room and as the officers sat down, Aaron moved forward saying, “Good afternoon, everyone. Thank you for your attention. My name is Aaron Hotchner and I’m the Unit Chief of the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI. This is my team, and we’re here to coordinate with you to try and stop these killings as quickly as possible. If you have any questions please hold them to the end. We appreciate you working with us, and now I’ll let Derek Morgan deliver our preliminary profile to you.” 
Aaron stepped aside to let Derek deliver the profile. Hotch had asked Morgan to deliver the profile because something about the officers sitting in front of him didn’t seem like they were convinced that they needed the team's help. Given the fact that Derek was the closest in age to many of the officers, and he could be just as intense as Aaron if he wanted, Aaron thought that the men would respect Morgan over someone like himself or Rossi. It helped that Morgan also looked more like the policemen now listening with unveiled trepidation about the profile. This was another part of the job that Aaron disliked. He not only had to profile the unsub but the law enforcement officers as well. His team and the local authorities had to work together due to bureaucratic rulings and sometimes the officers didn’t want the Bau's assistance. The idea that the team was ‘taking over’ or ‘standing on their turf’ often caused conflict. Aaron always tried to nip this conflict early. His team didn’t need to worry about that and quite frankly they all had better things to do. Aaron looked at the ten seated men, as he listened to Morgan. Most of the officers were looking at Derek, but one or two were consistently looking over at JJ, y/n, and Emily. Aaron clenched his jaw and resisted the urge to sigh. He could tell whatever conflict his team and this police unit were going to have would be an uphill battle. 
Hotch noticed when the men he was working with paid a little too much attention to members of his team. Hotch couldn’t deny that y/n, JJ, and Emily were all beautiful, intelligent, and capable and that combination was attractive. However, that did not give these men a right to act lewdly or leer at them. As Derek wrapped up the profile, he fielded a few questions from the assembled crowd. With that, Chief Bronson dismissed his men. Aaron gathered the team and they broke into smaller units to look for any clues that might bring them closer to finding the unsub. Aaron, Spencer, and y/n were headed to the high school which was the scene of the latest killing. Rossi and Morgan were headed to the hospital to see the bodies of the victims to determine if there was more to the signature than just strangulation. Lastly, JJ and Emily were going to go to the press to provide a statement for the townspeople who were panicking and holding up the police phones making those who really needed help unable to get it. 
In the evening as the team regrouped at the station, there was the kind of frantic energy they got once the case had really started. y/n had lots of thoughts and was ready to see what the rest of the team had discovered. She knew she wasn’t going to see much sleep tonight, so she moved to the break room where the coffee pots normally were in police stations. As she approached the room she began to overhear a conversation going on inside. The snippet she heard was, “So who are you picking, Blondie, Brunette, or _y/h/c_?” There was a laugh before the other man in the room began saying, “What about all three?” There was more laughter at this and as the unseen man began saying, “But if you’re really making me choose…” y/n walked quickly away before she could hear the answer. As she moved back to the team she thought, ‘These guys really have no standards.’ She felt slightly repulsed but did her best to ignore the feeling. As she stepped back to the table, and Aaron looked over at her, he could see that something was wrong. A few minutes later, when he was finished listening to Spencer’s geographic profile, Hotch moved to stand next to y/n. In a quiet volume, he asked, “Is everything okay?” y/n looked up at him. His expression had the smallest hint of worry,  and she alleviated that fear by saying, “Yeah. It’s nothing.” Aaron nodded and said, “Okay. Tell me more about what you were saying to Derek about the point of impact, we might be able to get a height on the unsub with that information.” y/n nodded and jumped into the conversation. Aaron could tell that something was off about y/n, but he wouldn’t push it. He trusted her to handle things herself and if she needed to, he knew she would ask for help. 
The night wore on and eventually, the team moved to the tiny hotel the town had. There were barely enough rooms to fit them all. The town was very cozy and picturesque in its quaintness. y/n thought about this as she drove Derek and Rossi to the hotel. She assumed it was a nice place to grow up in. To grow old in. y/n wasn’t sure where these thoughts were coming from, but she chalked it up to tiredness and the case. Because for seven men there would be no growing old here or anywhere. The sadness of that realization only made her want to solve this case more badly. There were always a lot of emotions tied to the cases they worked on, and to protect herself, she had to try and stay disconnected from the pain and hurt that the victims and the victims' families went through. But she couldn’t always hold back those emotions and now was one of those times. As everyone settled in for the night and said their goodnights, which just meant ‘I’ll be sitting up in bed reading over the same evidence as you one door down,’ Aaron walked over to y/n and said, “Goodnight, y/n.” His brief interaction with her at the precinct from earlier in the day flashed in his head. He didn’t like it when she looked upset. It made him feel nervous, so he asked, “You’d tell me if something was wrong? Wouldn’t you?” The question came out of left field and y/n blinked for a moment, not really knowing why Aaron was asking. At this point, she had sort of forgotten the rude comments being made by the officers, so she replied, “Of course I would Aaron.” At her response, Hotch infinitesimally relaxed and the two headed for the elevator together. Rossi had seen the interaction between them. He didn’t hear what they said, or that y/n had used Hotch’s first name, but he couldn't help but feel that something was there between the two agents. Perhaps it was the way Aaron leaned down a little bit to be in earshot, or the way y/n looked at his friend like nothing else around her mattered. David wouldn’t say anything yet, but he was sure he was going to start paying more attention to Aaron. Rossi wasn’t against whatever was happening between his coworkers. Aaron had had a rough few months, and he thought the man deserved some comfort.
In the morning most of the team was out hunting leads. Derek and y/n had stayed back for a minute because _y/n_ thought she had seen something new in the geographical profile. They would both head to the sight of the first body once she had looked at the board again. y/n was standing, looking at the map, engrossed in the pins Spencer had pushed into all the significant locations thus far. She just barely acknowledged when Morgan said he was going to use the men’s room. She also didn’t notice when one of the officers came up behind her. The man extended a hand and grabbed her ass giving it a squeeze. At the unwanted touch, y/n whipped around saying, “Hey!” The phrases echoed around the nearly empty office. She looked at the man, clocking his name on his badge, Monroe. There was a moment of silence before y/n incredulously said, “What was that?” Monroe gave a laugh and said, “Sorry, babe. I thought you were interested.” With that, the officer quickly left, as he noticed Derek coming back from the bathroom. Monroe nearly brushed shoulders with Morgan as they both tried to fit through the door at the same time.
When Derek got into the room, he noticed that something was off about y/n. She was standing still with a look of shock and disgust on her face. y/n tried to fix her facial features back to normal, but Morgan had seen and quickly strode into the room next to her. Derek looked her over quickly and asked, “y/n, what’s wrong?” y/n looked to the floor for a second, biting the inside of her cheek. She couldn’t really believe what had just happened. For a moment she thought about lying but knew that Morgan would keep asking until she gave in. She sighed and looked up at Morgan’s worried face, saying, “That guy just groped me.” At hearing this, Morgan turned on his heel, but Officer Monroe was halfway out the door with Officer Anderson. They were both laughing at some unheard joke. It took everything in Derek to not go over to the two men and give Monroe an unadulterated piece of his mind. However, he knew that wasn’t his place really. And he wanted to make sure y/n was okay. He turned back to _y/n_ and asked, “Are you alright? Did he hurt you?” y/n nodded her head no, saying, “No. I was just shocked, I guess.” Morgan nodded along and said, “It shouldn’t have happened, period. You need to tell Hotch.” y/n’s widened at the suggestion. It made sense of course. Issues like this were under his purview, but for some reason telling him about this made her hesitate. Before she could think about it too much Morgan repeated himself saying, “Hotch would want to know.” y/n put her palms up and said, “Fine, fine. I’ll tell him when he gets back.” Morgan gave her a look that made her say, “I promise I’ll tell him.” After a second of picturing that uncomfortable forthcoming conversation y/n said, “He’s gonna be so mad.” Derek could understand what y/n was saying but noted, “Maybe, but not at you, y/n.” There was another awkward silence before Derek finally said, “Do you need a few minutes, or would you like to head out?” Desperate for a distraction y/n, almost too quickly replied, “No. let’s go.” 
At the supermarket where the first victim had been found. Morgan and y/n took notes and got the security footage. It seems like they had a real lead by finding the license plate of the van that had dumped the deceased man in the alleyway near the store's load bay. However, the footage was too grainy to make out. After finishing watching the video, y/n moved to call Garcia and see if she could enhance the video quality while Derek asked the security guard who had found the victim in the morning some questions. When she wrapped up her call with Garcia, y/n briefly slumped against the outside wall; closing her eyes. She tried to think about why talking to Hotch about what had happened with Monroe was bothering her so much. She knew that Derek was right. Hotch wouldn’t be mad at her, at all. Maybe it was a feeling of embarrassment? y/n’s logical side of her brain said that she didn’t need to be embarrassed. She hadn’t groped anyone, but the feeling persisted. Maybe because talking about the incident meant being vulnerable in front of Aaron which was all fine and good when they were alone in her apartment. But having to do so at work was entirely different. y/n let out a breath deciding to push all her feelings back for a moment. She would deal with it later. For now, she moved back inside the rendezvous with Morgan. 
‘Later’ came as it always did. It was around five o’clock and the whole team was reconvening at the station. As the SUVs arrived one by one in the parking lot, everyone got out. y/n looked over the team. They all looked a little tired, but when didn’t they on a case? y/n felt the fatigue pull at her, but she knew she would find a second wind once she heard what everyone else had found out. She knew this unsub was here lurking in this little town, ready to kill again. She looked over to Aaron who was speaking to Emily about something. y/n desperately wanted coffee and she walked toward the front door as she got close, Officer Monroe walked out the door. His badge was off and it was clear that he was headed home for the day. y/n wondered if the man had a wife? Kids? The idea of it only made her more disgusted. As they neared each other she refused to make room for him on the sidewalk. She’d make him move aside for her. She wasn’t, however, going to look at him. y/n planted her gaze on the sidewalk. Much like Monroe’s unwanted touch that morning, she didn’t expect to walk into him full force. When she turned her face to the man he said, “Hey, watch where you’re going, sweetheart.” y/n could see that Monroe was actually enjoying this and she replied, “You ran into me!” Monroe smiled at seeing this woman like this -- uncomfortable. He had enjoyed the rush of her skin under his hands, and now he hoped for a repeat performance. Hardly thinking that there were others looking on, he quickly and forcefully placed a hand on her navel and then brushed downward. y/n stood stock still as this happened because she thought that it couldn’t possibly be happening. Not here in public, in broad daylight, in front of the whole team? It just couldn’t be happening. 
Aaron was chatting with Emily about the profile as he looked over the team to see how they were doing. As he looked at Morgan, and Morgan returned his gaze with a facial expression that said, ‘We need to talk.’ Aaron gave the man a nod and Morgan looked over to y/n who was walking forward the precinct. Her shoulders seemed pulled tight under her shirt but in a way that hid that she was trying to hide her stress. He watched as she walked into one of the police officers from yesterday who had been overly enthused by y/n, Prentiss, and JJ’s presence.  Aaron could barely hear the brief conversation between the two and as the word, “Sweetheart,” was thrown out, Aaron stiffened. And then it happened. He couldn’t fully see where or how far down the officer’s hand had landed because _y/n_ was blocking his view, but Aaron observed y/n stiffen, and that told him all he needed to know. 
Before y/n could find her voice and tell Monroe to ‘get the fuck off of her,’ Aaron’s clear sharp voice addressed the officer like a whip. Like a wound aimed at the man who dared to touch y/n. Aaron was over to y/n in an instant. He placed a hand on her shoulder, firmly but gently pulling her frozen body back and behind him. Aaron towered over Monroe, and he felt his blood boil. Aaron let a harsh breath out and said, “If you value your job, and your pension you will get your hand Off. My. Agent.” Aaron highlighted each word that evinced his anger. Behind him, _y/n_ felt a wave of relief from being pulled out of that situation. Quickly Spencer and Emily were pulling y/n farther away from the scene, but she could distinctly hear Hotch say, “Get in your car and leave. Now.” Derek watched as Monroe slinked away to his car looking defeated and small. Spencer and Emily walked with y/n into the precinct, asking if she was okay, and the team as a whole huddled around her to make sure she was really alright. When she had reassured them, everyone except for Hotch moved away from y/n. Aaron placed a hand on her forearm and led her to a chair. She sat and let the exhaustion of the case, disgust at Monroe's actions, and the feeling of his hand on her body overwhelm her for a moment. A shiver ran through her. Aaron knelt down on one knee to be more on eye level with y/n. If his words before had meant to intimidate and accuse, his tone now was one of reassurance and comfort. Aaron spoke professionally but with a hint of something more that spoke to their relationship outside of work. He asked, “Be honest with me. Are you okay? Are you hurt or bruised?” Aaron’s voice helped still her thoughts and she assessed her body before saying softly, “I’m not in any pain.” She didn’t answer his first question because she didn’t particularly feel alright, but she knew she was safe now. Especially now that she was with Aaron. Aaron registered this and asked, “Has this happened before while we’ve been here?” y/n swallowed and replied, “Yes, this morning right after everyone headed out for the day.” Aaron gave her that look that said, “Elaborate please.” y/n bit her bottom lip, wondering how to phrase what had happened. Not finding any more polite or dignified terms, she said, “Morgan had stepped out and I was focusing on the bulletin board and he, um, came up behind me and grabbed my ass.” She could see the anger, the controlled rage fire through him again and she wanted to say something to reassure Aaron that she really was alright, even if she wasn’t. However, he stopped her as the Chief of Police entered the building. Aaron turned his head back to y/n and said, “Excuse me for a moment.” Then with a tone of reassurance, he said, “This conversation isn’t over.” Hotch stood and looked at Emily who understood that he was asking her to sit with _y/n_. Prentiss moved to sit next to y/n. When this was done, Aaron turned his attention to the officer who had just entered the building and said, “Chief Bronson, your office, now.” His intonation left no room for questions or delays and the older man nodded and walked into his cluttered office with Aaron on his heels. Once the door was closed Hotch turned and he felt the anger bubble up to the surface again. As Bronson asked, “What seems to be the problem?” The man sounded nervous. 
From outside the glass-walled room, the team listened as their leader said, “One of your officers just assaulted a member of my team.” Bronson’s response was inaudible, but Hotch’s reply of, “What do I mean?” Could be heard clearly. At this, the team flinched, knowing that the man inside with Hotch was about to have his soul ripped from his body and handed back to him. Everyone listened as Aaron said, “What I mean is that just a few minutes ago, Officer Monroe had his hands on a member of my team in a private area. And that wasn’t the first time this has happened today.” Aaron took a steadying breath before continuing, “As much as I respect law enforcement and what you do, I’m highly concerned about what’s just happened. If someone under your authority thought they had the right to touch a federal agent, I fear what’s happening with normal residents of this town.” Bronson stumbled to find words and said, “Well I certainly don’t condone that behavior.” Aaron let out a harsh scoff, not truly believing the man saying, “Perhaps not, but that doesn’t change the fact that your officer felt entitled to do what he did. And I don’t think Monroe thought he was going to face any consequences, and I can only imagine that he assumed that because you’ve let him get away with behavior like this before.” After this, Hotch’s voice dropped lower so the team outside could no longer hear him. Derek said, “Well I think Officer Bronson has had his ‘Come to Jesus’ moment.’” That comment actually made y/n laugh and she felt a little better now that she could laugh at this whole situation. Hearing Aaron stand up for her like that made her feel warm inside in a comforted sort of way. Aaron finished unloading with the warning, “You’ll be receiving an ethics complaint from the Department of Justice as soon as I’m back in Quantico. You might consider cutting your losses before then.” With that, he got up and left the office. 
Later that evening in y/n’s room, she and Aaron sat. She was sitting on the edge of the bed facing Aaron who was in the only chair in the lamplit space. This was to be a continuation of their conversation from before. y/n looked over at Hotch and saw how perturbed he looked. She felt a tug in her chest seeing him like this. He already had to deal with so much and now there was this. She started the conversation in an attempt to soothe this new hurt by saying, “Hotch, it really wasn’t that bad. He didn’t hurt me, it was just unexpected.” At her words, he dipped his head and said, “It never should have happened, y/n. He touched you without your consent twice, and I couldn’t prevent it.” y/n frowned and felt that Aaron had to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders with this job. She said, “It’s not your fault, Aaron. I know you see how they look at JJ, Em, and I.” Hotch lifted his head and placed a warm hand on her knee saying, “Of course I see, and it bothers me more than I can say. Having these men look at you is bad enough, but when one of them starts to act on those feelings, it's unconscionable.” y/n saw that she wasn’t going to make him feel any better, so instead she put her hand over his and gently rubbed over his knuckles with her thumb. She said, “I’m going to be okay Aaron. And if I’m not, I’ll let you know. Thank you for looking out for me.” Hotch let out a breath at her touch and words, simply replying, “Always, y/n. I’ll always be here.” He wanted to lean in and press his body to hers. To cover her from unwanted attention and hands. But there was still a case, and she looked tired, but he promised himself when this was solved that he would be spending a considerable amount of time either on his or her couch with y/n on his lap and his arms settled around her; as long as that was something she wanted of course. 
The case wrapped up a few days later and the team headed home. On the plane ride back, y/n crashed on the couch facing Spencer. Emily, Rossi, and Morgan watched with a small amount of surprise,  then a soft understanding as Hotch quietly took off his blazer and placed it over her curled, sleeping body. And when Rossi left his office and walked toward his car he stopped and made sure Aaron and y/n didn’t see him as Hotch held y/n and leaned down to kiss her forehead. As Hotch wrapped her in his arms, y/n’s hands moved to his chest, and after everything that had happened on top of the case, at least she knew that she was always safe with him.
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rustbeltjessie · 5 months
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To what purpose, April, do you return again? (or: finally, a pinned post for April)
Hi all. I'm Jessie Lynn McMains, aka Rust Belt Jessie. I'm an Xennial/Elder Millenial (please don't call me a Geriatric Millenial, thank you) writer/artist/zine-maker/etc. (I wear many hats.) I'm queer and nonbinary/genderfluid, and as far as pronouns go, I’m okay with any human pronoun (they and she are my most-used, but I like he, too, and I especially like it when people switch up the pronouns they use for me). I’m disabled and neurodivergent.
I live with my partner and our two kiddos, both of whom are also neurodivergent, and right now I’m supporting all of us on whatever money I earn. I do freelance copywriting and editing as my main thing, but I also make a decent chunk of my income from selling my zines and books and pins and whatever else I make, so the more I sell, the better able I am to pay bills and take care of my family.
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Through my Ko-fi, you can buy my zines and books (I have both poetry and prose available) and pins, as well as commission me to make you a music-inspired mini-collage or hire me to edit your own writing. Or also just throw me a few bucks if you appreciate the content I make available for free.
If you live outside the US (I can only ship within the US via Ko-fi, because setting up shipping for multiple countries is a pain the butt), or just prefer to purchase something or donate via a different platform, I also have PayPal and Venmo (@ JessieLynnMcMains).
I also have a Substack newsletter. I try to send something out at least once a month. Sometimes it's a longer piece about music and nostalgia (I recently started a series called These Fucking Songs, for just that purpose), sometimes it's just updates on what I'm up to, sometimes it's something else. I'm currently working on one about poetry, and my writing process, and revision.
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As if that weren't enough, this month I'm doing a 30/30 on the Tupelo Press site, which not only means I have to write a poem every day to be posted the next day, but I am also fundraising for Tupelo Press. My goal is to raise $350 by the end of the month. You can follow along with my daily poems here (the newest is always at the top; scroll down to read previous days), and the fundraising page is here. (I'm also offering some cool incentives for people who donate; more info about all that is available on the fundraising page.)
I'm pro-trans, pro-vaccine, pro-sex worker, pro-abortion, pro-Black Lives Matter. I'm for harm reduction for any drug user or addict, meaning I want them to be able to use drugs as safely as possible, rather than forcing them into rehab or incarcerating them. I'm anti-censorship and anti-fascist. I believe everyone, everyone, should have a safe place to sleep and enough to eat without having to earn it. I consider myself an anarcho-socialist, basically, but I do vote. I'm telling you all that because if you are vehemently against any of those things, we'll probably not get along.
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I'm a forever-goth/punk who loves all kinds of music. (Things on heavy rotation for me as I write this are: The Replacements, Einstürzende Neubauten, and Oliver Nelson.) I'm femme but I'm a disaster femme; when I use nailpolish it's always sloppy and/or chipped, when I wear eyeliner it's always crooked and/or smeared, and I am incapable of not ripping a hole or two in every pair of tights and stockings I own. I love art and film and theater and literature and music. I'm a Shakespeare stan, I love growing my own vegetables, I collect souvenir pennies and stick and poke tattoos. I'm always a slut in theory, even when not always in practice. I'm perpetually nostalgic, melancholy, and restless. I spend all my free time posting pictures of myself on the internet and trying to prove I'm punk to anyone that'll listen.
Want more Jessie content? There's my website (still under construction, but it exists). Or you could try searching the my writing, my art, Jessie Lynn McMains, or Rust Belt Jessie tags on this blog. I also have a side blog, where I tend to post more frequently than I do on this blog. If you ask nice, I'll probably give you the URL.
On that note, my DMs and asks are open, and, as of right now, anon is on.
I think that's it! As always, whether you can send any $$ my way (or to my fundraiser) currently or not, keeping this post circulating helps. Thanks much. 🖤
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thedaythatwas · 5 months
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TW: Hegel.
So, what’s up with Shuake and dialectics? Click below to watch this user (who is not a philosopher) give this (frankly too invested) analysis a shot!
Something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately is the fact that most– but not all– of Joker’s confidant routes involve some sort of transaction. Joker does something for someone, Joker gets a favor in return. Joker’s identity revolves around what he can do for others. He’s got a different mask (haha game mechanic is narrative device etc.) for everyone in his life. 
Getting a little bit in my head about this led me to a (not-all-that-novel) realization: Akechi’s confidant route is largely non-transactional. Sure, he says that he wants to meet with you to talk about the Phantom Thieves, but that more or less directly translates to just wanting to hang out with you. The “favor” that you're doing for Akechi, if we follow the logic of some of the other confidant routes, is spending time with him. (Which is of course also about getting close to Joker for metaverse recon purposes… But I’d argue that amounts to more or less the same thing in the long run anyway). Really, that’s what your relationship with him is, up until you realize the heart he needs you to change is actually one of the big-bads of the game. And at that point… Well… 
Where am I going with this? I’ve also been thinking a lot about Hegel (I’ve seen some really fun posting about Akechi and Hegel on here this past week– thank you philosophy P5R tumblr!). Akechi’s paraphrasing of Hegel goes a little something like “advancement cannot occur without both thesis and antithesis.” Hilariously, this is how he frames his desire to talk to you more, his flirting is just like me forreal I understand him etc. etc. BUT! The interesting thing here is that the game is cueing you to view your relationship with Akechi through the lens of Hegel’s dialectics.
More on that to follow, but first, I want to plug the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy’s page on Hegel’s Dialectics here– If you haven’t used it before, SEP is a reliable, peer-reviewed source. It’s great. I use it like. All the time. It’s good for getting the gist of big ideas when you don’t have time to read full texts. (Also if I get any of this wrong please know that philosophy is not my field and I’m totally open to constructive criticism.)
Hegel’s dialectical process revolves around three key moments: the moment of understanding, the dialectical moment, and the speculative moment. These moments can also be referred to as thesis, antithesis, and synthesis. The moment of understanding, thesis, is the point at which an idea is seemingly stable. In the dialectical moment, antithesis, this idea “sublates” itself– the idea is challenged and destabilized because an inherent contradiction in the idea has been made apparent–importantly, part of the idea is preserved. The speculative moment, synthesis, negates the contradiction. A new idea takes form, containing elements of the original idea that was sublated (Marx’s theory of history, anyone?) 
This process continues on and on. Ideas naturally reveal their contradictions, are destabilized, and resolve their contradictions through the creation of a new idea, which is challenged again. This is because the dialectical moment does not come from outside an idea. Antithesis is not an external push against thesis, but rather, the moment when thesis is forced into instability because of its own tightly-bound restriction. 
So back to what I was saying. The game kicks off your relationship with Akechi with a nod to, uh, all of that. Could this be a throwaway comment? Of course! But it’s much more fun to work under the assumption that it isn’t. So bear with me. Akechi is framing himself and Joker as thesis and antithesis. What does that mean? Why do I think it has something to do with Akechi and Joker’s relationship being non-transactional?
Previously, I’ve thought that in the context of their relationship, Akechi represented thesis, and Joker antithesis. This isn’t exactly true (at least per the criteria above) but I do think I was on the right track. 
At the beginning of his story, we can think of Akechi’s worldview as thesis. The world is a stage, and he is a performer. His entire life is dedicated to destroying Shido. It’s a key narrative element of P5 that Akechi doesn’t have confidant relationships (as contrasted by Joker, who has many confidants and becomes stronger through building up those bonds). He views himself as deceiving literally everyone in his life for his goals– his “fans,” his father, the Phantom Thieves. He doesn’t trust, because to him, trust is failure. 
Still, he’s starving for approval, and not just from Shido. You can see the inherent conflict between his desires and beliefs in just about every interaction he has with Joker, particularly those where Akechi overshares about his past. He desperately wants someone to hear him. I don’t think his (primary) aim in that was to strategically win Joker’s trust by showing vulnerability– if that was all he was going for, I doubt Akechi would have been so honest. He omitted information, sure, but he gave Joker the honest-to-god broad strokes of his childhood.  
When Joker comes into his life, Akechi comes to realize that his stable worldview might be wrong. Watching Joker and the rest of the Phantom Thieves reveals the cracks in his own internal logic. Joker has friendships and he is stronger because of them. When Akechi sacrifices himself for the Phantom Thieves on Shido’s ship, we see his moment of synthesis. If Akechi really still internalized all of what he said in his “Teammates? Friends? To hell with that!” monologue, he wouldn’t trust Joker to change Shido’s heart in his stead. To be clear– he probably would have reached this point with or without Joker’s intervention. Joker just happens to push Akechi towards self-sublation a little bit faster.
In Royal, we see a new iteration of Akechi. He doesn’t really regret his actions, and he is still very distinctly Akechi, but we can see that his original perception of the world has made a shift. He is willing to team up with Joker. While he may not place a great deal of faith in all of the PTs, he certainly has real trust in the protagonist. He’s learned that he can be recognized (dare I say loved?) without being perfect, and accordingly, his driving desire for approval has been displaced by his desire to never be so completely under anyone else’s control again.
But ok— that’s kind of an old take. Perhaps a hotter one: I’d also like to propose that Akechi does the same for Joker. 
As mentioned above, Joker’s identity for most of the game is defined by what he can do for the people around him. While a large part of this has to do with the fact that he is a playable character, this is a game, and a game needs to have things for you to do– it wouldn’t be very fun otherwise– it also seems pretty clear that this is part of his characterization. Joker is selfless to a fault. Like Akechi, he is a wildcard who can take on multiple personas. Unlike Akechi, instead of having a handful of personas directly linked to the core of his character development, Joker has as many personas as you want him to. He literally has a mask for every situation. You can equip a persona of the correct arcana to level up your relationships faster– a game mechanic, but also, an interesting meta statement about how Joker bonds with his confidants.
In Royal, however, Joker has the option to do something for himself. His greatest wish isn’t for someone else's happiness– it’s to have Akechi back, for selfish reasons, I would argue. Joker can sacrifice reality to keep him in his life, and depending on the actions you choose to take, sometimes, he does.
Loving Akechi teaches Joker to be selfish. This is especially poignant when you think of how adamantly opposed Akechi is to staying in Maruki's reality. Giving up the true reality to keep Akechi is a wholly selfish act on Joker's part, nothing altruistic about it. And if he doesn't make that choice? Well, don't forget about how Joker spent his wish.
He would have learned how to do this without Akechi– one tends to realize that neverending self-sacrifice is unsustainable sooner rather than later. Again, Akechi just pushes Joker towards effecting that self-sublation a little faster.
By spending time with Joker, Akechi learns that there are people he can truly trust. By spending time with Akechi, Joker learns how to put himself first. Their confidant relationship from this perspective is not only transactional, it’s actually one of the most transactional relationships in the game. Joker actively impacts how Akechi sees himself and the world around him, and vice versa. Their relationship is profoundly transformative for the both of them. To paraphrase Akechi, advancement cannot occur without both thesis and antithesis.
But also, we can forget dialectics for a second. Even without a fun analytical lens, Akechi’s confidant route centers two misunderstood people who find understanding in each other. That’s enough for me!
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italoniponic · 1 year
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Caught | Trey Clover
Synopsis: Because of your difficulties with alchemy class, you asked for Trey’s help to study. However, as Heartslabyul is full of problems and crazy people, the moment between you two is interrupted. Many, many times.
Trey Clover x gender neutral reader / fluff / a bit of comedy / established relationship / use of “you” pronouns
Word count: 1327k words | Masterlist
Notes: This was something I wrote a long, long time ago. It was basically lost among my fics files but since it’s Trey, I decided that I could share a little bit of “general Trey appreciation” once in a while. Stan the baker glasses boy to good cakes and better kitchen skills!
Caught
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Trey’s voice was sweet and clear, filling the room with an incredible sense of comfort as if you two were actually in the kitchen preparing a cake together. But he was only reading the contents of the book of alchemy. Nothing else.
You were split on whether the idea of asking your boyfriend to help you study had been good. On the one hand, the theoretical content seemed much more understandable when it was explained by him. On the other hand, having Trey by your side in bed and having his voice so close to your ears was also becoming an immense distraction.
What to do in such cases? You were at a crossroads between pushing yourself to pay attention and not falling into the temptation of putting your head on Trey’s shoulder to finally fall into the world of dreams. His bed was large and comfortable, the cotton blanket had a very nice smell of cinnamon.
“Are you paying attention to the alchemy lesson?,” Trey asked suddenly.
The question shook you a little, putting you back to reality. Despite this, his tone wasn’t impatient. In fact, it was quite teasing.
“I’m trying,” you replied. “But next time, we’ll study in the library. It’s too comfortable here.”
“Oh? Why do you say that?,” Trey raised one of his eyebrows, his smile widening more.
“Because... uh... you... your room... I d-don’t have to answer! Just believe me!”
Trey let a little laugh slip away. 
How difficult it was to please such a simple person sometimes! But he understood what you were saying. He was also almost dozing off himself with the first-year’s alchemy theory book, a part of the subject he thought he would never have to deal with again in life. It was the reason Trey had become used to writing down Crewel’s lessons so as not to fall asleep in class.
However, being there reading that boring content on a bed that practically begged for someone to take a rest in and right next to the one he loved the most, his desire was to stretch out and leave study for later. 
Just to lay side by side, no much more than that. Letting the afternoon go by while they held a tea party in their Wonderland. 
But if anyone caught them in those conditions, Trey would hear a lecture from Riddle as if his own mother, Mrs. Clover, were there.
“Why don’t we go to Ramshackle, then?,” he suggested.
“The ghosts always interrupt us and Grim gets bored very easily. It would be the two of us running after him and preventing some good old chaos,” you explained, laughing a little while remembering how the cat must have been sleeping alone in your room. “Well, only when I’m around at least.”
“Heartslabyul is a quieter dorm in your opinion?”
“Of course I do. You all have a great leader and an amazing, super-responsible and caring vice…,” you touched the tip of the young man’s nose. “... that is you!”
Trey smiled and stared into the depths of his beloved one’s eyes. He was happy that his company was so dear to you and you saw him in such a positive way. This made Trey wish to reward you for words and confidence. Could he make you a cake? Maybe a pie? A Coconut “little kiss”? Or, who knows, another type of kiss.
Noticing the new glow of Trey’s big honey eyes behind his glasses, you had a small premonition of what you were going to receive. 
You closed your eyes and waited for Trey to get closer. When you two could practically feel your breaths collide, someone knocked on the door.
“Clover-senpai!,” you both moved away the moment Deuce entered. “Ace is making the flamingos fight and helding bets on them!”
You held back from asking how the whole thing was possible when you heard your boyfriend take a deep breath.
“Grab the flamingos’ food and drive them back to the fence. It won’t take too long before they stop fighting,” Trey explained. “And hit Ace on the head for me.”
Deuce nodded and gave a small embarrassed nod to the couple. The door quickly closed, welcoming again the comfortable silence of the room.
You approached each other again, returning to your original positions. You held Trey’s nape, preventing him from escaping again and he held your free hand. The book of alchemy became a mere souvenir, forgotten somewhere in the blanket. You could feel Trey’s lips rubbing so close to you when a squealing sound suddenly became audible. 
The door opened yet again.
You somehow jumped in the best spy action movie stunt move off the bed and stopped with your knees on the floor to face Ace, whose torso was clamped by some pink flamingo’s legs. However, that’s not what the freshman came to warn you.
“Clover-senpai! Deuce is choking on a hedgehog cub!”
“How?!,” you both questioned at the same time.
“I… m-mean… the flamingo may have accidentally made a shot on the hedgehog and it flew right into Deuce’s mouth. At least the poor thing didn’t fall into the flamingos stable like last time,” Ace scratched his hair, half relieved, half worried.
“Are you talking about Deuce or the hedgehog in that last part?,” you asked more concerned.
“It doesn't matter,” Trey interrupted. He was getting tired of all this. “Do the Heimlich maneuver and Deuce will be able to spit out the hedgehog. Now, stop throwing things at him! And don’t make the flamingos fight anymore!”
“O-okay.”
Ace then paused for a moment, thinking about inquiring about your presence there but he ultimately gave up. Instead, he closed the door and ran away. More quacks were heard along the way — the flamingo very happy for the new ride.
You two gave up on trying to kiss again and just layed together on the same pillow, equally tired. You turned to face Trey’s exhausted expression but you smiled as you saw him play with one lock of your hair. Trey took off his glasses for a moment and closed his eyes, enjoying that moment of silence while it could still last.
You also closed your eyes, hugging your boyfriend’s torso. The scent of cinnamon — with light touches of vanilla — seemed stronger than before. Suddenly, peace was reestablished and you were in your own world again. Nothing could interrupt this sweet moment.
“Trey! I swear I’ll exterminate this entire dorm someday!,” Riddle opened the bedroom door and entered in pure rage. “A group of seniors did the favor of burning three cakes in the kitchen! Flamingos and hedgehogs are all over the place! Roses everywhere! Ink spilled where even the Queen of Hearts could doubt! And... u-uh... er… eh!”
Riddle suddenly stopped, his eyes stuck on the bed where the couple were together and were trying to sleep. Trey sat down and stared at his childhood friend, although completely blurry. And the fact alone that he was trying to focus his sight in vain was quite nervous and intimidating. But mildly unintentionally. 
I said, mildly.
You turned around in time to see Riddle’s face intensely colored red and he looked away.
Extremely embarrassed, Riddle walked around a few times until he finally reached the exit and closed the door quietly. Or at least, you both wanted him to stay that way.
“Anyone who dares to interrupt Trey and the Prefect’s moment of intimate privacy again will lose their heads!,” Riddle threatened the whole dorm in a loud voice.
Trey hid his face in his hands, wanting the floor to swallow him. He knew that Riddle tried to help you with all the good intentions but he couldn’t have had the most awful time to misinterpret the situation you were in.
It was the first time you had seen your boyfriend so embarrassed and flustered since he was forced to sing at a surprise karaoke night organized by Cater.
“L-library?,” you suggested hesitantly.
“Please…”
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lunarflux · 1 month
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I saw a couple of asks you received about Aemond and love a while back, and I loved your answers! So I wanted to throw one of my own in there; I've seen someone saying that the love Aemond so desperately wants is the one from his family (his mother, sister, etc), thus he wouldn't welcome or want any other kind of love (romantic for example) because it would only be a placeholder. Do you think that's accurate? Because I honestly don't think so, I think it's a weird thing to say, because I feel like Aemond would be happy and willing to love and be loved; that he'd cherish any kind of love.
Hi there! Thank you for the kind words; this is an interesting question so forgive me in advance for the thesis you're about to read. I will also put the bulk of my answer behind a "read more" so I don't muck up anyone's feed. The short answer would be "no" I don't think it's accurate, but keep reading for the "however."
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Familial Love vs Romantic Love is one of those things that can yield different outcomes. Lack of familial love can lead to people pleasing behaviors (in order to illicit a reaction), acting out (to illicit any reaction regardless of if it's positive or negative), or attachment issues (avoidant might be the most likely in Aemond's case). It's hard to say because Aemond's family didn't abandon him, but they did let him down in one way or another. If he were to apply this expectation of "they all let me down eventually," I don't think it would result in him not welcoming love, but it would cause him to be suspicious about the person who he's interested in - or better yet, suspicious about who is trying to pursue him.
Constantly being let down by your family just leads to feeling numb in their presence. An example from my life is that my extended family (my godfather is among them) have forgotten my birthday every year since I was 14, and since it's next to a major holiday, that hurt a lot when I was growing up. Once I gave up expecting anything from them, I just... stopped caring and I honestly started to expect nothing from them. That led to me looking down on them because then I stopped telling anyone at all. I wanted them to feel foolish for forgetting; I wanted them to feel bad. I was no longer going to ask for anything or remind anyone. I just wanted them to feel defeated because now I expect them to let me down. "No expectations" is very different than "expecting nothing." I think Aemond is at the point where he expects nothing.
I added this to this ask:
It's always up for debate if he cared about her (Sylvi) or saw her as a placeholder. He might've seen someone he pays as the closest he'll ever get to someone who cares.
If he pays someone, there's essentially no expectation of emotion because the affection is given based on monetary value. She can't "let him down" technically, though we saw she somehow managed to do that by shrinking when Aegon humiliated him.
I'm going to give you a very gray answer - another "yes and no." It'll be easier to answer by breaking down your ask...
I've seen someone saying that the love Aemond so desperately wants is the one from his family (his mother, sister, etc), thus he wouldn't welcome or want any other kind of love (romantic for example) because it would only be a placeholder. Do you think that's accurate?
Here's an answer that doesn't really help. It depends. I've kind of answered this across different posts, but his "in theory" perfect person would have to empower him and essentially be everything his family wasn't. In this case, if someone wanted to poke the bear, they could tell Aemond to his face that this person is a placeholder, and I have no doubt he'd lash out because that challenges not only this person's value but his perception of their value.
But there's also an "okay, so?" because that person might have started as a placeholder and eventually they wouldn't be. I always run back to the "in theory" perfect person because they would have to provide everything and more to him and those provisions go beyond what a mother/sibling could provide.
When it comes to placeholders, we also don't willingly recognize when someone acts as a placeholder. You'd have to know what you're missing in order to fill that void with a substitute. Aemond is far passed wanting his family's love. If anything, it's not on the table at all anymore, and we saw that when he dismissed Alicent from the Small Council. He's mentally separated himself from them because he believes he's the only one fighting for what Alicent mistakenly took from Rhaenyra. He's fueled by conviction - "if we're going to do this, we're going to do it right; we're going to act; we're not going to take anything back. Just because you're backing away from the situation you put us in doesn't mean we have to suffer the consequences, and I'll be damned before I let this family fall because of your foolishness."
His blind spots with a partner that relate to how his family treated him might be in how a partner might have certain expectations of him (or no expectations at all).
I feel like Aemond would be happy and willing to love and be loved; that he'd cherish any kind of love.
So I believe he's capable of being in love and being loved, but I think he will be reluctant at first because, again, there will be that initial fear that this person might just be another who will let him down. However, this can easily be omitted based on what Aemond knows about the person prior to pursuing them. Because if you look at Criston Cole, Aemond enjoys using him as a pawn. There's no suspicion. It could be said that he only trusts someone depending on how far they're willing to go to prove they're trustworthy.
If Aemond were to find someone who has proven more than once (and without looking desperate) that they:
Do not seek to undermine him
Support his goals
Are self-interested
See loyalty as a blind principle as opposed to conditional
Prove they are trustworthy through consistent action
Then he would absolutely be resolute in his relationship. But also, the list above takes a lot of time.
I might be misinterpreting your use of "happy" because I see him as a melancholy love type. I wouldn't ever be able to see him with a person who tries to make him happy, instead of making him feel secure and comfortable. Aemond finds joy in proving who he is because no one seems to know who he really is or why he does certain things. His satisfaction comes from the proverbial mic drop moments where he can prove everyone wrong. His partner would be the person who can stand by his side and think "I always knew he was like this, and you're a damn fool for thinking otherwise."
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violetasteracademic · 10 days
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I saw a reddit post a while back talking about how “obvious” gwynriel is, with hundreds of upvotes and everyone agreeing, saying that it’s exactly how SJM sets up her love interests, and it makes me feel like a crazy person.
I agree that SJM is obvious with her couples, but for me the only logical obvious answer is elriel. The entire time I was reading the series it couldn’t have been more obvious, and all my irl friends feel the same. We didn’t even know gwynriel was a thing. They barely interact in the books, and even then it’s only vaguely friendly and mostly one-sided. Then I get online and see all of these people who genuinely believe it’s gwynriel that’ll be endgame and I can’t understand how we’ve read the same books.
This is the only reason I question elriel at all; am I somehow missing something? What the hell are these people seeing that overshadows elriel’s foreshadowing? I just can’t see it from their point of view, no matter how many theories or analyzing I read from them. I almost wished I could so that this ship war wouldn’t be so frustrating, but I just can’t.
Sorry to throw this rant at you, your posts and explanations are just very comforting and you explain things so well. I read them whenever I’m worried to assure myself I’m not crazy :,)
Hi sweet anon!
I certainly don't think you are crazy or missing anything, and I'm glad to know that some of my posts have brought you comfort. That is my one and only goal.
I've been getting more and more messages like this in my inbox, and I've been struggling with how to answer them because I've learned that a lot of my thoughts don't really fit in with the fandom at large. I don't mind that other ships exist. I have real life G/wynriel and E/lucien friends that are very chill and wonderful and not knee deep in the online fandom and don't think horrific misogynistic things. I stay out of spaces where I'm bound to see something hurtful, and I scroll so fuckin fast when I see the Elriel community screenshotting and reblogging bad takes cause I *don't wanna see it.*
I'm just a girl, and while I'm honored that this little weirdo's opinion has become of some value in this little comfy cafe corner I'm trying to build here, I don't want to say the wrong thing and make people feel discredited and invalidated. I've learned that people really like being in the drama and venting and focusing on how badly the other side is behaving, which I don't really like, and it often leaves me at odds with my own "side" of the war. But since you are here in my asks, I'll share my thoughts. Please know I am saying this with all the tender love and care in my heart, but I say:
Just let them exist. You don't need to understand. You also don't need to let it worry you. None of us are in control of the ships that are sailing in this war. So for whatever it is worth, I want to encourage you to try to stay away from the spaces that make you feel upset, confused, hurt, or angry.
We are all honestly similar in ways that might be hard to admit. If we are here, deep into this fandom, we are probably connected in a number of ways. Maybe we're a little bit lonely (me), a little bit mentally ill (me), a little bit hyper-fixated (me). Maybe we are easily consumed and obsessed, and don't have anywhere for that energy to go in our real lives and so we live on in a chronic state of escape and disassociation (yep, me).
We are also an exceptionally small percentage of SJM's readership, and we take things as far as a fan could possibly take them. This is not how most readers are interacting with her work. So to see hundreds of upvotes on something, even thousands, yes- it seems like a lot. But it's not actually that much in terms of SJM's actual numbers. Anyone on reddit, tumblr, tiktok, ect, is looking for community and people who share their thoughts and likes and dislikes. I think this is often why a lot of non canon ships actually grow more popular than canon ships, because people are here looking for a road the written story will not take them down.
I don't think it's strange or offensive or unhinged that ships other than Azriel or Elain exist and are popular. I *do* think its a little odd that this fandom has taken the stance of proving non-canon things as canon instead of just enjoying crackships, but I can't honestly sit here and say my posts proving "canon" to try to comfort people who want the same fictional couple as me is not the exact same behavior. I think I'm right. They think they are right. There will come a day when Sarah lets us know what she has decided, and it's out of our hands. But the ships will live on.
I love so many non canon ships, and I engage with them here every day. This is what fandom is for. I think this fandom in particular would be a lot less toxic if we would just live and let live and leave each other be. I am gonna keep making theory posts and writing fanfic. They are gonna keep making theory posts and writing fanfic.
Take care of yourself. Rock the block button. Strangers on the internet do not get unfettered access to me or you or anyone else just because we are online. Set some boundaries for yourself. Lurk where you feel good.
I hope my page continues to be one of those places where you can lurk to feel better. And if that ever changes, block me. I encourage it deeply. I actually feel relieved when I can see that someone has blocked me, because I know they are taking care of themselves and also saved me the time and energy of trying to diffuse an argument.
I hear your frustrations. I know it sucks to want to go on reddit if that has been a fun and comforting space for you, and now it feels overrun and not safe and not fun. Grieve that. We obviously all care very deeply, and that's okay. It's nothing at all to be ashamed of.
But at some point, we are all gonna have to learn to live with each other, because no matter what happens in canon, the ships are not going anywhere.
Take care of yourself, anon. And I hope you continue to find comforting spaces to rest.
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