#also i think you need the app to get the other statistics

[pbmonkeybutt]

Idk if people actually like looking at Spotify Wrapped but this is the first year where I'm not a****** s****** so this is all me baby!!

[losergames]

Chop Shop is strictly 18+ for language, themes, and potential explicit content. 

🔗 - Game Intro | Bug Report | Ko-Fi

Episode Three is now available! (+ 86,000) - PLAY HERE

Get your first taste of the underground car scene.

Meet some other players in the game.

Be made an offer.

5 achievements up for grabs!

And more!

AN: thank you so much for the patience - i've been dying to put this update out. lots of new characters and lots of variation!! there are 3 major paths to choose between in this ep, i recommend trying them all out! and thank you to my betas for keeping me sane lmao

This update comes with a patch and UI refresh (Version 1.1.2) Notes are under the cut. If preferred, you can access them in game in the start menu.

STORY

EPISODE 01:

MC should now be able to smoke! Buying cigarettes at the shop was not triggering correctly. If playing with an old save, you DO NOT have to restart as code at the beginning of EP 03 has resolved the error. Player will need to restart if they wish to read smoking related scenes in previous episodes.

Updated MC Name selection. Player can now choose from a list of names instead of having to input one to proceed.

Player can now give Taha their chocolate bar if it's in their inventory.

When asking Maz about their scars, the second choice 'You want to ask about it but you're going to keep your mouth shut.' should now take you to the correct response.

Extended and updated 'End Game' scenes.

EPISODE 02:

If MC is faint after exiting the car, but also drunk, they should now get the fainting scene, followed by Dilani helping the MC in the bathroom.

UI + TECHNICAL

SETTINGS:

Autoname Save is now defaulted to ON. This is to add ease and flow to gameplay, especially for mobile, tablet, and app users, instead of calling for an inputted saved name. If player wants to input save names, toggle Autoname Saves to OFF.

Autoname Save previously only used the forename of the MC but now includes the surname as well.

Removed the Fullscreen toggle as it is only intended for desktop use. Player can still toggle fullscreen function via the UI bar on the desktop interface.

Added a choice indicator toggle. (This probably won't come into effect until EP 04 or 05)

Changed serif font from Vollkron to EB Garamond.

OTHER:

Changing the MC's pronouns via the Dashboard has been updated. Additionally, after confirmation will take player back to the Dashboard and not close the dialog boxes entirely.

Hovering over 'Personality', 'Motives', and 'Skills' titles in the Dashboard will now display an information box with a definition. Mobile and tablet users will need to tap on the title.

'Resume Game' now only appears on the main menu when there is an autosave in the saves log.

Choices styling changes.

General UI and button style changes.

Fixed errors with the text message styling.

Added styling for reading text off of a page in game.

Darkened blue in light theme 'Skyline' to reduce eye strain.

CREATE A SAVE

Introducing Create a Save! This feature allows players to quickly manufacture a save file and start at a later point in the game.

Set your identity, appearance, history, and statistics; including personality, motives, and skills. Continue to set key decisions made in previous episodes.

Randomise options available for creating a PC and key decisions.

OTHER

Fixed gaps and spacing issues.

Minor phrasing and sentence structure changes.

Grammar and typo fixes.

whew -- that's a lot of patch notes! apologies for so much that needed to be fixed.

this update shouldn't break/ mess with saves but as a disclaimer i will say, if you spot anything funky, broken, or you don't think things are triggering correctly, try starting a new save. the new create a save feature is incredibly code heavy, and it's been tested relentlessly, but i wouldn't be surprised if something crops up.

if starting a new save doesn't resolve your issue - please submit to bug report or just send me an ask/message.

some things have been meaning to get fixed for Some Time - thank you to everyone that is using the bug report form!

apologies if there are typos and/or bugs - this was a long one to edit and my lovely betas did an OUTSTANDING job reading so much for ep 3 - thank you so much again!!! this time i am going to give it a bit more time before i put together a patch so i can grab more error responses haha.

create a save has also added a wee chunk to the word count, somewhere around 6k, but i'm not including it in the episode 03 word count as it's purely code. so, if you think the total wc is off, that's why!

if you've read this far, happy reading and thank you so much for the continued support!! :) - becky <3

[bluecollarmcandtf]

M O O N L I G H T ™

Pulling into the lonely gas station, my eyes quickly find what I'm looking for, a pair of blue lights emanating in the darkness. The glow is coming from the gas attendant's skull: clear indication that he's a Moonlight™ employee.

"Good evening, sir," he says with the overly-endearing tone of a gracious host, "How may I be of service tonight?

I don't hide my distaste for the pathetic menial worker, leaning on his mop and waiting for my reply like he's got the best job in the world. He doesn't actually believe that. He doesn't even know what he's saying, let alone doing!

"Just fill her up," I grunt.

"You got it, sir!" he beams, tending to my car with a pep that's out of place for the late hour.

Moonlight™ was the app that revolutionized working culture forever. It allows the user to sign up for a job while they sleep. All they have to do is doze off and some insufferable AI from Moonlight™ will resume control of the body via remote connection. People like it because they get paid work without experiencing all the boring hours and insincere customer interactions. Subsequently, they always get the same unbearably eager personalities stuffed in their bodies. Even without the glowing eyes, their idiotic grins would make them stand out a mile away!

"How has your day been, sir?" he contines mopping as the gas slowly pumps.

"Don't try to chat," I snap.

"Of course, sir," he doesn't miss a beat, smiling as he returns his neon gaze to the sidewalk he's swabbing.

I just roll my eyes and wander inside. The app doesn't record memories while it's in control, so this guy has no idea how humiliated he should feel. No one should have a shit-eating grin on their face working the night shift as a gas station janitor! I'd die before I gave up my dignity to Moonlight™ like this fucking loser!

On the TV behind the register, an ad plays...

The costumed man on the left steps forward and announces, "Join the revolution. There are over forty-two-million Moonlighter's taking advantage of their sleep! That could be you!"

The statistic makes me cringe. It's nearly doubled since the last time I checked...

The man on the far right of the screen happily taps in, adding, "We're constantly expanding our scope, so check with your employer! If your job doesn't already have a Moonlight™ option, then ask your boss to give you one!"

God, they're pressuring people now? Some jobs should not be done by an AI puppeteered Moonlighter...

Finally, the man in the center steps forward to deliver his lines, "Remember, Moonlighting is a safe and healthy way to not only make money but also get a good night's rest! Why work all day, when you can do it in your sleep!" his head turns, making it seem like he's smiling at either of his coworkers, "After all, we are!"

The three men laugh in unison, like true colleagues chumming up at work, but I know the truth. These three are worse than actors, they're empty marionettes for the Moonlight™ corporation. I doubt they'd ever even met each other in real life...

"Shut up!" I groan, smashing the power button to turn it off.

This world is going to shit. Moonlight™ has grown too large over the past year for there not to be some conspiracy or ulterior motive. I don't know what it is: the elite keeping the working class in their place, our government influencing our decisions, a foreign country converting us into their slaves! It all sounds crazy, but I don't think a single theory is impossible with an app like Moonlight™.

I'm the only one probing into this mess. I may have only worked as a detective for a few years, but I never did any of it fucking asleep!

A few days later, I track down my first lead...

"Good morning, sir," the garbage man says in that unnaturally smooth cadence they all have, "Is there any trash you need collected?"

"I just have some questions," I snort.

One hand pulls the hem of my shirt over my nose while the other swats at the flies. These garbage trucks are absolutely filthy. I doubt the garbage companies even bother washing them out anymore, but why should they if their workers are soulless husks without the ability to care? The man in front of me seems completely oblivious to the mixture of rotting smells and accompanying bugs. His glowing eyes don't even blink as a fly lands on his face, crawling through the hairs of his beard. He's probably lucky that he goes home with no memory of this downright awful job.

"Are you looking for employment with Moonlight™ incorporated?" his smiling lips stir the bug on his face, but it quickly buzzes into the moist retreat of the man's dark armpit, "I'd love to help you install the app and-"

"No," I cut, "Just open the truck. I accidentally threw out something I shouldn't have."

I study the man's frozen grin for anything. It's a test. The Moonlight™ AI is designed to accept demands from free-willed customers, but I have a suspicion that the building nearby is an undocumented base for the company. If I'm right, the company would hate for anyone to root through the garbage of their secret lab...

"...I apologize, sir, but the garbage has already been compacted, and it is unsafe for non-employees to look inside. Please let me know what it is you are looking for and I will search for you."

His artificial glee didn't wane, but the blue light in his eyes did flicker just barely. This guy might be asleep, walked around by remote AI tech, but I could still tell he was lying. I'd like to see one of the Moonlight™ detectives figure that out. As I said, some things are better done the old-fashioned way...

"Well, thanks anyway," I snark, planting a slap on his sweat-soaked back. He says something about it being his pleasure as he resumes handling the garbage, flies eternally buzzing around his smiling head and glowing eyes.

Continuing my investigation, I pop down in the sewer, looking for an underground entrance to Moonlight™'s secret lab...

"Are you lost, sir? Let me help you."

I've had to breathe through a mask to put up with the heavy cloud of steaming sewage, but the Moonlight™ septic worker seems fine, smiling with an open mouth, specks of God-knows-what dried on his teeth.

"No, I'm where I should be," I dismiss him and march past.

Suddenly a muddy glove sticks out and holds my chest. "I'm afraid you cannot pass, sir," his smile is as strong as ever, but the trademark glow of his eyes intensifies.

I've never felt more sure about my suspicions. This mind controlled worker seems ready to fight rather than let me pass. I wonder if this poor soul knows he's being used as a guard as well as being a Moonlight™ sewage worker.

"Why don't you show me the way out then," I relent.

"Of course, sir," his hand removes itself from my chest, leaving a dirty print, "The sewer is a dangerous place for civilians."

I follow as he marches me out of the sewer. It's better to leave and come back later with a plan. Today, I confirmed my suspicions, but tomorrow, I'll finally see what secrets they're cooking up in that lab. I return home and end the day with the satisfaction of being close to a major discovery. Sleep finds me quickly...

Waking up in my bed, I check my phone and find an unsettling message waiting for me...

"Congratulations on finishing your first shift with Moonlight™!" the text reads, "Here is a photo of you hard at work last night!"

"What the FUCK!"

I jump out of bed, but instantly everything feels off. My back aches and my legs are more tired than they were last night! My pajamas are uncomfortable, pinching in areas like someone else dressed me in them! My mind is racing with confusion, and an overwhelming sense of self-consciousness rushes over me. My face burns from the violation, but most of my fear is focused on the strange feeling lingering in the back of my private area.

"What did they do to me?" I try to be pissed, but all I can do is whimper.

Suddenly my phone rings...

"Hello," I growl.

"Good morning, sir," a familiarly gracious man's voice rolls through the call.

"Tell me who the fuck this is!"

"Someone who noticed you snooping the other day, sir," his voice sounds like it's smiling.

Suddenly it clicks. Whoever's calling me from Moonlight™ would never use their own phone and voice. They must be using some poor schmuck that thinks he's working an honest job right now. How am I ever supposed to find who's behind all these layers of lies?

"You can hind behind your brainless puppets," I sneer, "But I will not stop looking into this fucked up company!"

"But now you're one of our puppets, sir. I'm not sure how much credibility a detective has if he spends his nights working the room at the dirtiest club in town..."

"That's sick..." I whisper, thinking about the picture on my phone. The idea of me gleefully stripping for a room of disgusting old men makes me shiver.

"Good luck with your investigation, sir," the voice continues, "But just understand that every time you sleep, your body will get up and report to that club. I have to admit that you're hiding a rather tight body under that trench coat of yours."

"You were there?" I mutter.

"Oh I had to meet the man poking his nose where it didn't belong, sir. I got very familiar with you. You were very friendly last night, so I poked something of mine where it didn't belong."

The voice on the other line laughs, and all I feel is utter humiliation. I hang up the call and stare at the photo he'd sent. It was me alright, smiling like a maniac in the gayest outfit I've ever seen. I didn't like my body being dressed like that. I hate that I was happily busting my ass for the enemy. He had to have been getting off at my humiliation last night. I'm sure he relished every second of what he did to me. I don't even want to think about the sensation left in my ass.

I need to push this investigation faster.

Because tonight, when I go to sleep, I'll be helpless to prevent this from happening again.

[itspileofgoodthings]

anyway I don’t have the whole Jordan Peterson dating propaganda rebuttal fully locked and loaded but basically it’s just never about statistics. never was, never will be. and I’ll say that while acknowledging that the statistics can be objectively bad, especially for certain specific sub-groups, people with strong and specific convictions, highly intelligent people etc. but it doesn’t matter because the fundamental truth is that it’s always “one in a million the chances of feeling the way we do” etc. etc. and always was?? things are hard right now, on the dating scene, because life is hard right now and it’s hard to make money and find a stable situation that makes you happy. things are extra hard because society is incredibly fractured on the basis of both belief and vibes (lol) so the odds of finding someone just out in the great wide world of indiscriminate datings apps who’s going to believe what you believe and have the same set of cultural values (if that’s the word I want) are incredibly low. It’s not going to happen! And if you’re out looking you’re going to run into those obstacles over and over and over. But it kind of doesn’t matter? Because love is still real, people can still feel it, God brings people together. And I actually don’t think you need to do anything except continue living your life and doing things because they’re good for you, if and when you can, like having as much of a social life as you can and is feasible. The rest, in my humble opinion, is out of your control and you should just let it go! Yeah we’d have an easier time if our culture was more unified, if we fundamentally believed the same things and shared the same values. But even then the stars aligning of it all in terms of liking each other and wanting the same things and being in the same place and communicating in a way where we can actually understand each other is just out of our control and the answer is trust, love, and patience. And also a willingness to accept that you might just be alone, romantically speaking. So start filling your life up with other things and start getting used to the burden of it. Because what is there else to do? Except NOT accepting it and growing increasingly desperate. In any case, and to return to my point, this is my answer to the fundamental lie of the Peterson dating discussions. And it’s just that statistics have nothing to do with ANYTHING when it comes to finding love and happiness. It is never statistical; it’s always beyond that. My parents’ love story, my friends’ love stories, coworkers love stories—it can’t be quantified because they did x. On some level it just happened to them. They were lucky enough to find it all. (Or you know they forced it and are now unhappily married. Happens a LOT. But presuming that we’re talking about ending up happy.)

AND.

ON ANOTHER NOTE (that is still sort of related)

That same study of statistics doesn’t apply because it only takes one. So his whole tired repeated take about how intelligent women have the hardest time finding husbands because men are scared of their intelligence? Might even be true! But it doesn’t MATTER because nobody should want to marry everybody! If that makes sense! It’s always personal. I have felt the fear/lack of interest that he’s talking about as an intelligent woman (hey-oh!) walking through this world and I don’t give a damn because a man being afraid of me is proof that he is not FOR me. He is like my students except that I am not in the position to take him by the hand, metaphorically speaking, and walk him through David Copperfield. If someone ever wants to marry me, they will be delighted by me and confident that they have something to offer me. Period. And I used to think that that was true only for me but I think it is and should be true for everyone!!!! Peterson might be even stating something true or at least COMMON when he talks about this fear but his fundamental premise is faulty a) because we never have to marry a whole group of people and b) Because he acts like this is a problem for people, specifically women, to wrestle with and it just isn’t. There is nothing to do WITH the problem. As far as our list of actionable items goes it doesn’t make the cut. Or close to it. It doesn’t matter because that lack of interest and fear is not something to be engaged with and “solved.” Literally: go with God. Yeah, maybe you get your hopes up or get hurt because you think there is a chance and then turns out there wasn’t. That sucks and is painful! But. There is still nothing to do with that except move on. A person interested in me (in you, in anyone) would not react in this way is what you gotta tell yourself. It’s just a sign it isn’t right; it’s clear communication from the universe. (The person, God’s Plan etc.)

And. This isn’t even getting into him saying things like “the average age gap between men and women who marry is 4 years” for no clear apparent reason. So the fuck what Jordan? What does this have to do with anything??? (Sorry for swearing.) Yeah I can believe in some circles that’s a common number that occurs. I also know lots of people who are not in fact four years apart. I am actually having trouble thinking of a married couple i currently know who are four years apart. Like. So. What is even being said????!??? What is the purpose behind it????? Except an attempt to fear-monger, spread a lack of hope, sow discord. But honestly sometimes I think he’s just yapping.

He’ll also contradict himself by saying things like “you only have five people to try on statistically speaking” (the hell??? Jordan???) “so choose wisely” while also saying things like “a relationship isn’t something you find, it’s something you build.” So like … which is it? Because I think solemnly choosing someone in this objective way and trying to settle into building a relationship is going to lead to a lot of needless frustration. Like. You can’t build a relationship, IMO, until the opportunity to do so appears. And feels right to both of you. And you both take it. And you cannot manufacture that, force it into existence, call it into being. I mean you can TRY. But it won’t end well. The happy right comfortable good ones are just times where the opportunity is given and both people want to take it. He won’t admit the role of grace here and I think the role of grace is everythinggggg. And this Not even getting into him referring to marriage as being handcuffed to a person and unable to walk away which is imo the wrong vibe.

Which is kinda my too-long point. It’s the wrong vibe. Things are not bleak if you look at them right. They just are what they are. I actually think the more specific of a person you are the more likely you are to find someone capable of making you happy. And yeah maybe that process will be easier for people who are younger and just sort of around people who share the same values as them etc. though even then, even !!!!! then !!!!!!!!! there’s a mystery to who finds someone and who doesn’t at certain times because you’re dealing with the human soul and free will and all its mysteries in addition to everything else. It’s always kind of a miracle. It’s always one in a million. It’s always specific, singular, personal. And once again: we desperately want to believe that there is something we can do about this to bring it about and I guess there might be, indirectly. But we can never manufacture the opportunity into existence, or study the problem away, or analyze the difficulties out of being and into our power. We just need to let it go, if we can. Jordan’s rhetoric preys on that fear in a ridiculous and ultimately contradictory way and I hate to see people believing it, being affected by it, quoting it, spouting it, internalizing it. In conclusion he can’t scare me but he can deeply annoy me. Thanks for coming to my ted talk.

[superthirstparty]

okay, i gotta make an (unpaid) endorsement post!

PEOPLE WITH MENTAL ILLNESS(ES), PLEASE CONSIDER READING THIS, I PROMISE THE PRODUCT I'LL BE TALKING ABOUT IS FREE!

got problems with your mental health and perception of time? no spoons to make a bullet journal or maintain a diary, even though you want to?

i suggest you look at the daylio app. let me explain why!

it's an app that's fully customizable to your preferred user experience, and what it does is that it tracks your moods and what you do in a day. you can add, delete, and modify activities and many other things to suit your needs!

it's got a text note option, it lets you add pictures to your entries if you wish to do so, you can set goals to achieve, and daylio will store it all. it's like a sort of digital diary / bullet journal.

how did you sleep? did you brush your teeth? take a shower? wash the dishes or maybe take out the trash? take a walk? talk to a friend? visit family? are you having a good day? having a bad day? you can keep track of it in daylio. that way you can keep track of yourself and see how you're doing overall.

premium comes with a few nifty extra features as well, and it's pretty affordable at WAY less than 20 bucks for a whole year! (i think i paid 12)

BUT, and this is the great news, it's not a must-have if you don't feel like paying for it! you get the most important features for free! (which is basically almost all features!)

you can save backups and load them onto other devices as well! you can get weekly and monthly statistics of what impacts your moods, how far you've come with your goals, and how stable your moods seem to be in total! you can even tell it when to send you a reminder to make your daily entry! (very useful for people who forget easily, just like me!)

as someone who can barely keep track of time and doesn't even remember what they had for breakfast, it's a great tool for me. if i forget when i've taken my last shower, i can just open daylio and check. it also makes me feel so good to tap a shit ton of buttons and see that i've accomplished something, even if it was only getting out of bed and surviving. it only takes a few minutes out of my day, and it's become one of the most important apps on my phone!

if that sounds useful to you, get it from the app store!

anyway, i made this post to make this hidden gem more visible to people who might need it, and i thank the mutual who recommended the app to me. it's an absolute lifesaver, and my quality of life has improved a lot since i downloaded it!

[handern]

Literally they put the fucking pikaman ad every FOUR POSTS this is driving me fucking insane if you think its going to make me buy no ads Tumblr you're dead fucking wrong I'd rather stop using the app altogether and delete my 12 years old blog

I blocked that blog and asked not to be shown that fucking ad ever again like ten times and it still shows

I don't MIND being shown ads but if you're going to show me THE SAME AD over and over every FOUR NORMAL POSTS I'll just delete this app forever and find better things to do with my life I'm going insane

Oooh Tumblr staff are so quirky and funny and relatable they understand us MY ASS it's just advertising and actually analyzing their users behavior

If anything it's making me go from 'maybe I should support this free website I've been using for a decade by buying stuff from them' to 'I hope you go bankrupt before twitter does'

I understand the need to advertise and get some money but this is just trying to force people to buy ads free versions like every other shitty big website does

Also @staff maybe fix the bots problems with the money you get with your advertising or smth or are they too good for the statistics you show to investors about the number of new users

Anyway if you're using Tumblr on mobile DON'T update it, it was fine before I updated it yesterday

[thepodcasthoard]

How to Start a Podcast

Part 1

The second article Sydney kindly gave me is How to Start a Podcast by buzzsprout. Buzzsprout is also a hosting site, which you need when you start a podcast, so they have to know their stuff (according to the article, since 2009 they've helped three hundred thousand podcasts launch, which is impressive).

Buzzsprout breaks the process into ten actionable steps.

Develop a concept.

Define goals

Pick a theme/topic (they provide a whopping seventy-five in this article linked)

Find a niche

Name it (they have provided this article for further reading)

2. Choose a format

I didn't think about this before I read this article, but there are different ways to present podcasts- the article mentions interview, cohosted, scripted non-fiction, news, educational, and scripted fiction (and I will provide audio drama help as I conduct my own research and get information from podcasters about it).

The article goes over the 'optimal' podcast episode length, with some statistics, but the only thing that seems to be important they put in the first sentence: "Make your episodes as long as they need to be and no longer."

They also talk about an episode release schedule, with more stats.

3. Set up recording equipment

Of course they talk about microphones, including another article all about that aspect of podcasting, but apparently there are different types of microphones. I never knew that. They go somewhat in-depth about the different kinds, so I'll leave the technical reading to you.

4. Choose software

The article also talks about different software, from recording to editing. They give a few different options in the article, with links to each. I'm not sure if they get commissions based on how many people click through, so I'll leave you to go there to give them some love.

5. Record your first episode.

The article further breaks the process into smaller steps.

A) Write an outline (with further reading that includes templates)

B) Pick your recording room wisely

Before Sydney's post, I didn't know that sound travels different off of hard and soft surfaces, though I guess in retrospect I should have figured (echos in canyons, for example). I didn't realize it would make a big difference, but I guess it does.

C) Connect your equipment and set up your software

This is important- make sure you hit 'record' and everything's plugged in, folks.

D) Microphone technique

If you're going to speak into a microphone, learn to do it right.

E) Test different recording styles

Test for quality.

6. Edit

They provide an article for further reading. In the main article, they break it into broad steps.

A) Make sure the intro and outro are engaging

Hook the listener right away.

B) Edit for content, then everything else.

Start with big cuts, then move smaller.

C) Fade between tracks

Apparently, cutting audio can sometimes make clicks and pops in the recording. Who knew?

D) Create a punch list

I guess this is a to-do list.

Then when all that's done, you export it! They throw a bit of technical jargon at you (what the heck is an ID3 tag?) but thankfully, it seems to be fairly simple with this podcasting host site. I'm not sponsored by them, it just seems easy enough for beginners.

7. Create podcast artwork.

They also include five tips for that.

A) Visually communicate the subject

B) Design for a variety of sizes

C) Don't use too many words or fonts

D) Avoid 'podcast imagery' (microphones, for example)

E) Keep your brand consistent

They provide a few sites for people to create artwork, so that's cool.

8. Set up podcast hosting

To be honest, this confused the Hell out of me. But there are a few videos about it they linked at the end of the step, so feel free to read the full article and watch them.

9. Get listed in podcast directories

More technical stuff, but I guess that you need the last step- hosting- to actually get onto Spotify or Apple podcasts or any other site/app.

10. Launch and grow

The article goes over two ways to launch- grand and soft- and a few other things like imposter syndrome. It talks about seven marketing tips.

A) Tell friends and family

B) Create a buzzsprout ad

C) Post episodes on social media

D) Join groups and forums

E) Cross-promote with other podcasters

F) Overcast ads

G) Create a call to action

The article also recommends celebrating, and I'm always down for a celebration. Don't be embarrassed it's about your own achievements, or feel like it's needlessly self-congratulatory or self-centered. It seems like a ton of work, so give yourself some credit!

[who-even-knows-0-0]

intro post finally haha

this has taken me way too long to build up the motivation to do but since im redecorating my entire blog i thought itd be appropriate

hi you can call me sydney [oscar is okay too but yeah] and i go by all pronouns :] [including it/its please please please :3] except she/her

questioning neo pronouns???

i am trans masc [ftm] and pansexual and i am also a furry, therian, age regressor and i have d.i.d [separate blogs tagged below]

silly statistics [???] shit:

current hyperfixation: gravity falls

first post: feb 24th 2024

followers: 27

posts: 125

tags [consistent]: #the creature of creativity

what i will post on this account:

mostly just random shitposts or funny reblogs and stuff, sometimes art if i ever get round to it haha. basically any random thoughts that spew out of my head, through to this laptop and Here.

[i also do take art requests and if you ask me any non-offensive question i will love you forever]

specific things that i am interested in [maybe now including music]:

ultrakill

deltarune

the x files

lotf [lord of the flies]

the marauders

anne with an e

stand by me

wes anderson films

red dwarf

adventure time

scott pilgrim vs the world

the lost boys

labyrinth

what we do in the shadows

horrible histories/ghosts [just The Gang]

almost every alice oseman book

studio ghibli films

good omens

the breakfast club

donnie darko

bears in trees

james marriott

half life kind of

gravity falls

doctor who

other blogs i possess:

@the-honeybee-system - our blog for. well. all of us :D

@our-agere-blog - now in use!!!

@therians-of-the-system - not in use, cannot be deleted due to password failure, if can delete will delete if cannot then may be in use later on.

@the-beastie-in-your-village - not in use, cannot be deleted due to password failure, if can delete will delete if cannot then may be in use later on.

@something-definitely - freaky shit :3

@daily-jam-cat - jam cat. sometimes.

linksssss:

insta -

tiktok - https://www.tiktok.com/@oscartheoctopus11

pronouns page - https://en.pronouns.page/@who-even-knows

pinterest - https://pin.it/5YYU91FNB

pinterest side account - https://pin.it/2LNGsuV1n

guys i think thats it

i went through almost every app i have trying to gather information to make this post gang i have crawled into the deep dark depths of my pinterest account just for this

although i am tired and probably have missed out some stuff so i will be updating this frequently if needed :]

[ashwithapen]

poem #8

(this one is a long one and comes with a list of TWs, so the actual poem is below the cut. this one is also a lot more prose-poetry/slam poetry-esque than my other stuff :thumbsup:)

TW for school shootings, trans genocide/transphobia, abortion (mentioned), police brutality (mentioned), suicide (mentioned).

the thing about TikTok written 4 april 2023

y’know, i only opened this app because i saw a clip somewhere of one of my favourite bands. the singer made a joke in Scotland last night, and surely someone had to have posted a better-quality video on TikTok.

it was the first thing i saw when the app loaded, because they just know me so well. i watched it and saved it so that i can watch it again as a distraction or something later. but then i made the mistake of scrolling.

the next thing i saw was a 5-minute video about how people my age and younger were screaming for their lives just across the pond outside of government buildings. they are desperate not to be killed in their classrooms, desperate to live through this semester, desperate to be heard, but the suit-wearing rulers shuffled through their 1000-person sea, one foot at a time like it was dark and they couldn’t see the people my age and younger lining the walls, holding their signs, screaming for change. i watch it, and i have to keep scrolling.

some video about all the shit you can buy for just 8 USD from a gas station in Japan. i don’t watch the whole thing; i keep scrolling.

someone with a cool haircut is sitting on the floor of their bedroom, crying. the sound playing is saying something from a show i haven’t watched about a storybook fox who is sick and tired of living in a hole. they are crying, the tags say that they are trans, and they are crying. their bio says they are just 14, that’s three whole years younger than i am and something in me surges because that is my sibling whose name i don’t know and that i may never get to because the threat of genocide has them, 14, crying on their bedroom floor. not tonight, i think in silence. i do not want to cry tonight. and so i keep scrolling.

and the next video is an indie artist who didn’t exist a year and a half ago, but even so, their new single that when viral drops in a few nights so i follow their page and i hold my breath: should i scroll again? i do, i don’t learn.

and there’s a joke i don’t get with the loudest fucking noise i’ve ever heard. it makes no sense, i scroll again.

oh look, a 9-year-old girl who got shot when she went back to pull the fire alarm so her classmates would know to run. run. run. her face is the centrepiece, her smile from an earlier date something i need to learn to shake off by tonight. i can’t even imagine what being her might have been like. i scroll again.

a cover of a song, sung atop guitar chords; another joke that the comments don’t explain to me either; another reminder of the imposing genocide; abortion bans are being enforced; they’re using force against unarmed protesters again; a poem spoken to me by a person named Lee; more tour clips to distract me; some statistics about teen suicide rates rising in the States; and one of those checkpoints that tells you that it’s time for a break. stand up, stretch, get some water. the song playing low in the background is one i’ve heard maybe a hundred times by now, but i do as i’m instructed, and i take a deep breath.

my curtains are open and i can see through my window. i remember the song i started writing the other day about how people like me seldom live long enough to see their hair turn grey. i remember how i couldn’t finish it off because something salty and wet rubbed the ink off my page and i closed my book and i pretended that i wasn’t upset, like how, in an hour from now, when dinner is served hot in front of me and they ask me “how has your day been?” i will pretend my phone is not heavy in my pocket and that the kids' shouting isn’t plaguing me and that trans people aren’t losing their right to exist and be free and that a girl half my age wasn’t shot because she got unlucky one day.

and i regret opening TikTok every time that i do because i always fail to miss all those kids i heard dance on here. instead, i get singers on stages and artists who speak and kids who know how to barricade doors with desks and bookshelves and how to defend themselves with their trendy metal water bottles, and news about the latest legislation passed that ensures that more kids will be forcefully born into a cyclical mess where they don’t get to grow up without routine checks as to whether they can tell apart a juice box pop and a gunshot.

and there are not enough words to tell you all the things i have heard scrolling through TikTok, where the mothers are gentle with their children until they go to sleep, because then they take off their soft tones and don their broken voices, screaming out in hopes that their kids won’t have to.

it has to be a phenomenon: the ability you need to grow by my age if you want to use an app as unsuspecting as the sound of a clock, TikTok. if you cannot master empathy and apathy and the way in which you must be able to switch between one and the other at the littlest flick of your wrist because what’s funny one minute must always precede the latest tragedy, death giving way to a joke and a smirk from a pretty girl in a skirt whose page a month ago was all about ways you can help in Ukraine, but clearly, she has become a master of this miracle.

and at the end of it all, when it has been hours of hearing about Neo-nazis and the generalised patriarchy and the right or wrong ways to raise bread yeast, i think three things:

one: a simmering roll of “wow”. both my empathy and apathy have been expended, and now, i have nothing left to give.

two: i am never coming back here again, like a hotel where they promise a rest, a break, a chance to get away from your day-to-day stress. one star.

three: oh look, my band said something funny again, and god, i could use a distraction.

[schizosupport]

Hii! It's been a while, I hope you're doing well! I've missed you! I'm in the discord but I'm not very active as I'm super busy but I came on to ask a random question?

So for background info, it seems some people don't know but there's this really cool app seperate but connected to Spotify that will show you all of your Spotify statistics, minutes, stream counts, and top artists and tracks, etc. Also consistently up to date too. I absolutely love looking at my data and such (basically your wrapped but all year) *also should mention you have to contact Spotify and they'll send your data and such, otherwise it's a more basic version in case anyone was wondering*

Well I was talking about it and my coworker mentioned it was strange how much I listen to music, others said it was really excessive too. Could that be a bad thing?

I am pretty much non stop listening to music. Mostly for background but I can't really stand not having some sort of distraction or background noise. We're allowed to wear a headphone at work and I don't watch much tv so I'm listening to it at home non stop too. Should I not be listening to music this much? music is absolutely a huge part of my life and is my top coping skill too. Besides when I need a break sensory wise, I can't stand silence. My head gets pretty loud and I get anxious. It just seemed a bit weird to me about how my coworkers were so shocked to see how much music I listen to. And it shocked me just as much of how little they do.

Hii!! *Waves* Welcome to the inbox :3

Ok so first off, it's likely true that you listen to more music than most people, but I absolutely don't think that it's a bad thing!

It sounds to me that music is pleasure, coping and comfort in your life, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that!

I think a lot of neurodivergent people listen to a lot of music compared with the norm, and psychosis and schizo spec people are definitely not an exception. Music can help both with overstimulation and with understimulation, and it can help drown out unwelcome auditory hallucinations as well. Music can help lift our mood, just as it can help us feel seen and heard when we're in a bad mood.

A lot of people just either don't have the same benefit, or the same need, so they listen to less music. As humans we tend to assume that our experience is much more universal than it is. So just like your co-workers were shocked at how much you listen to music, you are shocked at how little they do! It's surprising, because as long as we are not confronted with this type of bias, we tend to just assume that we are approximately as everyone else.

And often these realizations can be very meaningful upon confrontation. For example learning that other people have an easier time with this or that thing. It impacts someone's self image (realizing you have an impairment) which can lead to self acceptance in the long run, but often starts out more in the territory of 'I'm weak' or 'I'm wrong'.

Then you know, once you're in treatment, everyone is quick to pathologize everything, up to and including yourself.

And it creates this mental landscape where whenever you find one of these things where you are different from some peers.. it creates anxiety. Like oh no is this disordered? Am I 'wrong'?

And i know this is a tangent, but my point is. Listen to your music! Enjoy it! Fill your life with as much comfort and pleasure as you can. There's no downside inherent to this quirk, so unless it was causing you distress in some way (beyond worrying if it's wrong or weird), I urge you to lay the questioning aside and enjoy the music!

[doctor-says-im-alright]

Honeslty I dont entirely get it as a 24 year old fully able to do those things. Phones have apps that scan things into pdf and clean up the document, as an example. But also I grew up rural and honestly I think that helped me because everything rural comes late and everyone has to figure it out and teach each other.

But I will say technology has far surpassed intuitive abilities. It is now very money making oriented with 3 4 minute ads in a row if you want to do anything, pop up after pop up ad trying to read any website making it completely unusable. Yea… theres ad blockers. How do you find those? You search for them.

Heres the thing though. Google and other search engines frankly no longer work. I dont know if any of you have noticed this. I used google a lot in school and work to figure things out. Nothing about me has changed in my ability to search for things.

But my ability to get an answer has just about vanished seemingly overnight.

First 10 results of google are ads it feels like. Not even relevant. Past that is all SEO optimized shit that perhaps had some resemblance to a word I wrote but isnt helpful. Also the page descriptions are no longer decent which requires me to click on the page to figure out if its what I want and then its a war through the pop ups, glitching ads, newsletter requests, etc. google and many other search engines are literally becoming useless. Books arent so easy to get ahold of now, either, and get the specific information you want. (Seriously. When youre burnt out of trying desperately to figure something out, how do you figure out which book will tell you what you need?)

Also there isnt as much standardization anymore. Like I actually have no idea how to take a screenshot on my new laptop. I cant figure it out for the life of me despite watching my statistics teacher do it. I can print screen and save as pdf, but I cant take a screen grab and put it in a file. The keys she uses doesnt do anything on mine and actually Im pretty sure this laptop straight up doesnt have the function. Apple products have become weird about things like this, too.

Like technology is not intuitive anymore. It really sort of was to begin with. Kids could grasp it a little easier because it was meant to be easy! But it still required teaching and practice, and its only gotten more complicated, more cluttered and busy with too many buttons and no explanation and 75% of what youre looking at is actually not even relevant.

Also the keyboard thing is weird. Dont know why its not being taught, it is a skill and a hard one. Kids arent growing up with keyboards, they are growing up with touch screens that dont require that skill. Weve surpassed that.

Ill also add that the helpless feelings I imagine are getting more rampant and the kids are no longer able to believe they can figure it out and dont try. As everything gets more complicated, parents are the same way. Snappy and frustrated the kid doesnt get it, tells them their stupid or do it for them, and they never learn and learn they cant ever. This society is becoming extremely helpless and its being forced to be.

seriously, though. i work in higher education, and part of my job is students sending me transcripts. you'd think the ones who have the least idea how to actually do that would be the older ones, and while sure, they definitely struggle with it, i see it most with the younger students. the teens to early 20s crowd.

very, astonishingly often, they don't know how to work with .pdf documents. i get garbage phone screenshots, sometimes inserted into an excel or word file for who knows what reason, but most often it's just a raw .jpg or other image file.

they definitely either don't know how to use a scanner, don't have access to one, or don't even know where they might go for that (staples and other office supply stores sometimes still have these services, but public libraries always have your back, kids.) so when they have a paper transcript and need to send me a copy electronically, it's just terrible photos at bad angles full of thumbs and text-obscuring shadows.

mind bogglingly frequently, i get cell phone photos of computer screens. they don't know how to take a screenshot on a computer. they don't know the function of the Print Screen button on the keyboard. they don't know how to right click a web page, hit "print", and choose "save as PDF" to produce a full and unbroken capture of the entirety of a webpage.

sometimes they'll just copy the text of a transcript and paste it right into the message of an email. that's if they figure out the difference between the body text portion of the email and the subject line, because quite frankly they often don't.

these are people who in most cases have done at least some college work already, but they have absolutely no clue how to utilize the attachment function in an email, and for some reason they don't consider they could google very quickly for instructions or even videos.

i am not taking a shit on gen z/gen alpha here, i'm really not.

what i am is aghast that they've been so massively failed on so many levels. the education system assumed they were "native" to technology and needed to be taught nothing. their parents assumed the same, or assumed the schools would teach them, or don't know how themselves and are too intimidated to figure it out and teach their kids these skills at home.

they spend hours a day on instagram and tiktok and youtube and etc, so they surely know (this is ridiculous to assume!!!) how to draft a formal email and format the text and what part goes where and what all those damn little symbols means, right? SURELY they're already familiar with every file type under the sun and know how to make use of whatever's salient in a pinch, right???

THEY MUST CERTAINLY know, innately, as one knows how to inhale, how to type in business formatting and formal communication style, how to present themselves in a way that gets them taken seriously by formal institutions, how to appear and be competent in basic/standard digital skills. SURELY. Of course. RIGHT!!!!

it's MADDENING, it's insane, and it's frustrating from the receiving end, but even more frustrating knowing they're stumbling blind out there in the digital spaces of grown-up matters, being dismissed, being considered less intelligent, being talked down to, because every adult and system responsible for them just

ASSUMED they should "just know" or "just figure out" these important things no one ever bothered to teach them, or half the time even introduce the concepts of before asking them to do it, on the spot, with high educational or professional stakes.

kids shouldn't have to supplement their own education like this and get sneered and scoffed at if they don't.

[luce-ing]

Regarding Lando hate: My opinion, and many Lando defender’s opinions, is that a lot of it is toxic masculinity combined with ableism in regards to his mental health and showing emotions. I can go into more detail if you’d like.

Another part of it is people jumping on the hate bandwagon since it’s the popular thing at the moment. Content creators are using criticism of him to get clicks and it fans the flames.

And the whole thing is ridiculous because so many of the reasons people hate him are things other drivers have done and no one has said anything about. And a lot of haters also just ignore facts/statistics and cherry pick what to listen to. 🤷‍♀️

But I do think a lot of it boils down to the toxic masculinity, ableism, and people just needing someone to hate and he’s an easy target. McLaren makes it easy as well since they don’t ever stand up for him or defend him (except when it’s to distract from cheating allegations lmaoooo)

it’s unfathomable to me how social media apps became like this. Only for likes and popularity online you help spreading hate or negativity / mind you, this actually might reach Lando as many fans are deeply crazy.

And you are right, in regards to his attitude (i’ve seen many comments like this), if we were to actually consider it a problem, other drivers should come into discussion as well.

I’d like to read more about your opinion if you’ll have me. This curiosity of mine on Lando’s “influence” on X, or IG, came after yesterday’s race, bc i honestly thought he didn’t deserve the penalty, (i found it unfair) and to my outer surprise, people were happy he is losing (+ other previous races in which he won, or lost the pole).

Mclaren definitely showed this year how unprepared they are to be at the front, both in managing the race and their drivers. That radio transmission still lives in my mind.

[halidaia]

Do video games cause violence?

Boomers love to say that video games cause violence. But in my experience, the younger generations haven’t had any wars. All the ongoing wars were started by middle-aged men. And if you look on the App Store, most of the popular games aren’t violent. So I’d like to turn the question around on the boomers and say that, actually, cartoons cause violence. We’re talking about the Looney Tunes, Tom & Jerry, and Walt Disney cartoons that existed in the early and mid 1900s. I’m isolating those because the newer versions of those cartoons, the ones that came out in the 2010s, aren’t as violent

Think about them. Chip and Dale destroyed Donald Duck’s house with a mountain-sized snowball in one episode. In another, they broke into his house and shot him with his own Christmas presents until he let them steal his walnuts. Many times have Tom & Jerry burned eachother to a crisp, sliced eachother in half, stabbed eachother, flattened eachother, and other things I can’t even remember. The hijinks of Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, and Elmer Fudd all gave the impression that guns were completely harmless toys, and not actually dangerous hunting tools. I can’t even count the amount of times Elmer shot Bugs or Daffy and the two were completely fine. If you’re watching that, and this is the first time you’ve ever seen a gun, you’ll think “oh so they’re harmless and don’t work”. You’ll also be desensitized to violence at a very early age, which is a problem later in life

This point is driven home by Wile E Coyote, which takes the cake for the most violent cartoon series. Wile used guns, catapults, giant rocks, trucks, grenades, bombs, poison, and anything else he somehow got his paws on to try and kill some stupid bird. And it never worked. Wile would get injured in the most horrific and gruesome of ways, and his body would literally be flat or an accordion. Nothing could kill him. If that doesn’t desensitize you to violence and make such harmful activities funny, then no video game has a prayer of being able to do so

GTA doesn’t hold a candle to Looney Tunes. Just because something self-reports to be “safe for kids” does not mean it actually is. And just because a violent video game has the integrity to be honest and say “yeah, we’re probably a little too graphic for young eyes” does not automatically make that game evil and all video games bad

This is my opinion piece. Feel free to copy it, if you need. In 8th grade, my English class was forced to research statistics and write about whether or not we thought violent video games cause violence. If you are being forced to do that, and you need inspiration, or are even just looking for a perspective that’ll piss off your boomer teacher, you can use this

[chartreuseian]

Look at me, sending the ask and not just planning to XD For the emoji ask game: 🌠, 💻, 🤔, and ⏳, please and thank you :)

*insert head pets here*

❤️❤️❤️

🌠What are your top three most commonly used tags on AO3?

Ugh. I am the worst at tagging. I never know what to tag or how to tag it. Often I can't think of what should be tagged, or what needs to be tagged beyond things that sort of warn the reader of what they'll come across.

Statistically it's probably something like D/s not because I've written much of it, but because I feel like it's the sort of thing people would want to be warned about in a fic. Other than that though, I mostly just tag little rambles and thoughts that give a bit of an idea of where something is going.

💻What do you write your stories on? Laptop, phone, paper, etc.

Laptop. Tiny notebook in the car for Car Thoughts. Phone notes app when I'm doing my walkies and Thoughts attack.

Also scraps of random paper and post-it notes at work but those are very much written in code!!

🤔What are some words or phrases you find yourself overusing?

'then' - hands down number one on my overused list. I try to edit them out, but a lot sneak through.

Sentence fragments in triplet would be up there too. I love a "He looked at her then, unable to look away, unable to think, unable to blah blah blah" sort of moment but I know I have a tendancy to overuse fragments particularly in this format.

(also, lol, sneaky 'then' sneaking in!)

⏳If you could go back in time and tell your younger writer self something, what would it be?

Hmm... Don't stop, maybe? But even then, I think if I hadn't had the big break, I would have learned to love it like I do now. Forcing my way back into writing I think was such a good thing for me, and I don't know if I'd get as much out of the process if I hadn't had that experience.

This feels like a lame answer, but I have nothing (and I even went and had a shower to try and make thoughts appear!!)

[destinimott]

My mom whose a narcissistic parent told me that I was self diagnosing. They often differ to that when you have an answer to their behavior. I know I am masking. I know that I am autistic. It is rare for a young black female to be diagnosed. People in their late thirties especially minority females are just now being diagnosed with it. My mom said since she didn't notice it in my childhood then I can't be. She is adamant that it is schizophrenia and bipolar disorder because she read about it. She refuses to accept any of the reading material I give her. She wants to be a psychologist because she went to a few group meetings and feels that people need her help. Psychology doesn't screen for narcism or autism. They're questions are generally structured towards the side effect of the medication. It's a 5 minute appointment. So the next time I see the psych I am going to have to ask to be screened. My mom keeps admitting me into the psych ward. I don't know what other answers they are looking for if she wont accept mine.

She tells me I need to 🤐🤫 the mind 🧠 to distract yourself. Meditate. So now she's some expert because she listens to apps on the playstore.

It is a cry 😭 for help. I am trying to move out so that I am not subjected to this treatment from her. She plays like the good guy and that I am the crazy one no one will ever listen to. She has isolated me from family and friends. She tells people that I have a mental illness not condition. It was hereditary so that would also be a fault of her own. There is a history of mental illness in the family. So she's the only one who didn't get it?

I have practiced these social skills. I work in customer service 🐕‍🦺 and have been doing so for the last twenty years. What you can't get it learn from home you can learn outside the home. So I took college classes that she is unaware of. She doesn't even give me credit for going to college. She thinks I'm retarded. Slow. That is the psychology of black women. They think because you are black your dumb. Ugly black doll test. Then she must also feel that way about herself. She is projecting that on to me. I'm her psychology rants if how she is so much more educated because she took such and such class and she graduated she feels she is better than me. I dropped it. I didn't see the point of contributing especially when she continues to reject the fact that I am sports medicine 🌿💉 I am an herbalist. Exercise scientist. I decided to go a shorter route and get a certificate in holistic wellness as a 🦮 we too know psychology. I have been working in the field for twenty years. We dont diagnose. We refer you to your primary care. It's a wellness center aka spa. Alternative 💊💉 is complimentary and supplementary to your Western care. Many people are abandoning Western 💊💉 because they haven't provided any answers. So I wouldn't be any different to give up on them because I found the answer myself. Self help books provide that for you. Self diagnosing is like them making fun of you for checking the Internet for your signs and symptoms. My mom feels that is ok to be judged and diagnosed by her and other white medical professionals.

Psychologically black women are the ugliest in the world 🌍 i do statistics. I don't know the last time she read a scholar study. I didn't think I've even seen her on Wikipedia. She has admitted she doesn't write papers. I would be an English lit 🔥 major if I didn't choose to go into sports med. There is only so much you can do with an English lit degree.

[bokafix]

The dos and don'ts of painting your kitchen

From using a primer to the type of roller, here are some very helpful tips for painting your kitchen and avoiding costly mistakes!

When it comes to painting your kitchen, there are a few things you need to keep in mind. First and foremost, find a reliable and reputable painter or decorator to do the job. This is key to ensuring a good finish and a paint job that lasts.

Second, make sure you choose the right paint for the job. There are hundreds of different types of paints available in a multitude of finishes, so be sure to ask for advice from your local store or ask the decorator to help you find one that is right for your kitchen. Kitchens typically require special paint, one that withstands high levels of humidity. Did you know that 70% of households have mould?! Mould can be found in up to 9% of Terraced houses, 18% of Nurseries and Schools, and 26% of Hospitals, Outpatient clinics, and Nursing homes.

Be mindful of oil damage when painting your kitchen. Oil can seep into walls and cause long-term damage, so it's important to take the necessary precautions to avoid this. Choosing a paint that can handle grease and oil is super important. You also need to think about painting over oil-based paint with water-based paint as it will lead to seeping and stain like patches. Using a primer first will eliminate this problem, you'll know when you've sufficiently covered the wall when the old colour is no longer visible.

Thirdly, keep in mind that kitchens need repainting more often than other rooms in the house due to the high amount of traffic, grease and oil build-up. Statistics show that on average, a kitchen needs repainting every two to three years.

Do prep your surfaces with sugar soap to remove dirt and grease which will definitely give you a better finish and could help you avoid multiple coats.

Don't use a brush if you can avoid it, rollers are best for a smooth airbrush like finish and come in a bunch of different sizes,shapes and textures so you can get the same quality finish for even the tiniest of areas. Be sure to get the right type of roller as again, there are different rollers for different surfaces and using the wrong one can result in a bad finish. This is something you also want to splash the cash on, as buying a cheap paint roller will leave small lumps of fluff in your beautiful paint job, luckily they aren't that expensive and can be washed out with washing up liquid and reused. A time saving tip is to store a used roller in a plastic bag overnight if you wish to continue with the same colour the next day.

Do be sure to use masking tape to cut in along edges, windows, doors and between the wall and ceiling. Be careful when choosing which type of masking tape to use as there are also various types. Choose the weakest one or one specific for interior wall painting so you don't peel the paint off the wall when you've finished but it's important to remember that it's there as a guide and not to completely cover in paint, doing that will not end well!

Finally, do cover floors and furniture as well as wear old clothes and cover your hair because trust me, paint can end up in the most unexpected of places…

How much paint do I need?

Knowing just how much paint you need is a tricky one as it depends on the condition of your walls to begin with, what colour you're painting over, the size of the room and how many coats you need to do. You can use this handy paint guide to figure out roughly how much paint you should buy for your particular room size.

By following these simple tips, you can ensure that your kitchen painting project goes off without a hitch!

Don't forget you can book a painter, decorator or local tradesperson in minutes with the Bokafix app. Read more and get fixting!