#also i realise i should have used a different word for organs in polish but who cares !!!!!!!!!!!!
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warning for some mild gore and organs yaaa
sorry mayo got gored for spooky season
#halloween is coming up#let a girl draw some internal organs#art#my art#mine#utau#mayo coulombs#mild gore#i was originally going to just draw myao eating hismelf#but it looked bad#and you couldnt see her organs much#so i tried a different pose#but then no om nom nom action#also i realise i should have used a different word for organs in polish but who cares !!!!!!!!!!!!#we are elarning ok#every day is a school day at the noctlas332 tumblr blog
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dive in the psyche – zoya khan. – self para. @wildshub a week before the dawn of eve retreat.
It was all getting a bit much. Zoya understood that couch surfing, begging one friend and then the other, would not hold up long-term. She was also fine with it. For the most part. She took every day as it came. At first, it was like having sleepovers and catching up knowing there would never come a time to pay up. She stole a thing or two, not as much out of sentiment -- but more out of need. It paid for the food, and the drugs and the parties. But when beds became scarce, when one night stands became tiresome, when everything was getting over the fucking top -- she pawned her friends earrings and bought a ticket to LA. She had friends down in LA, there was more life there, more...ways to get around. She didn’t think it through, she never did.
It didn’t take long for LA to become just the same shit in a different package as San Francisco. Hell, maybe she would have been better with a plane ticket to New York. Maybe she could have tried out her insane persona down in Florida. Regardless, she was here, on a couch, in some fucking courtyard, on some fucking party, stoned as a motherfucker next to some stranger who kept passing her a joint. The lights were flickering, purple and blue and yellow. There was laughter all around. Mariana was getting fucked in the toilet, probably, or snorting up another line who could even tell at this point. She looked down at her watch, but her eyes were blurry so she sighed heavy sinking deeper into her chair.
“You alright there baby?” the guy with a thick accent she could only describe as ‘foreign’ asked, passing the joint yet again for her already low and mellow mood to fly through. Fuck she was done with weed. But she took it anyway. Of course she did. You don’t say no to free shit when you’re fucking homeless.
“Is anyone ever?” she responds with a smile, pretty generic.
“Shit, I’m alright right now mann...” he chuckles, his eyes a deep shade of red, half closed. He was a fucking goner. The best type of person to have a conversation with. She scoots over closer to him, laying her head on his shoulder as she placed the next hit between her lips.
“Can I tell you a secret?” she looks up at him, a brow raised as she wonders where such a question would take his fried mind. But he nods, taking the roll-up away from her hand as he rested his hand over her shoulder. She played with his palm a bit, examining the rings and the tattoos and the chipped nail polish. She wondered what type of person he was. What type he could have been, what exactly brought him here. But at the end, none of that really matter. The cosmos had aligned them together, for this specific moment in time. From conception, birth, childhood, all the years lead to this specific moment. The only moment they had.
“Sometimes I think we are all just a virus, ugly disgusting virus multiplying in some little cell of some large fucking organism. Taking over, destroying shit like....like a virus does. Robbing this little cell of all the resources, all the good shit it needs just to satisfy some existential need for fucking luxury and McDonalds and what-fucking-ever. I mean, I’ve been...I’ve been living on the street for three months and...what the fuck is even the point in any of this? Live, have fucking fun, fuck, eat, piss, shit....survive. Survive, for what bro? Survive to just...die? Shit make no sense...”
She could tell he was in and out but she figured she wasn’t making much sense anyways. “That’s dark man...” he says at the end, taking a joint out of her hand again. “Maybe the point is...there is no point. Maybe that’s the best point there is. I mean, can you imagine having to live up to a purpose? The pressure? Nah man...” he continues, pulling her closer for a moment, out of some sort of comfort. “Life is great because there’s no point. Don’t think many people realise but, trust me...I been everywhere and, best thing you can do man, is just take life as is. Count your blessings, cut off the shit and just..be, ya know?” he passes her the joint again, smug as if he’d just given the most profound advice out there.
“Okay, Mr. Worldwide...” a small chuckle and she’ll take a hit. “I don’t know, I don’t think shit’s dark it’s just...how shit is. I mean, we live in this disenchanted world where we are sitting here smoking and there’s a kid starving across the ocean for what? So some corporate fuck can buy another car? I don’t know bro, it just ain’t right...”
“Life ain’t right. Some people are happy with having little, some ain’t happy when they have it all. Just plain human nature bro. Don’t stress over shit you can’t change. The important thing is that...the world owes you nothing. If you live by that, you’ll be alright.” he sighs heavy and this time the words actually landed. “See, not a single fucking soul - from me to your mother to that corporate fuck - owes you a fucking thing. Not the world, not the people...hell, not even good karma -- or bad karma. Life just is. And then it isn’t. That’s it. Don’t lose sleep by expecting shit to fall in your lap. Go out and take it or sit back...and don’t. You out here on the streets but...you could be dead on the streets bro..it’s fucked out here...”
“That’s what I’m saying man..” she says massaging her temples, she was getting dizzy from all this shit. The smoke and the bullshit philosophical exchanges that ultimately lead to nothing. She gets up on her feet and walks slowly to the bathroom, pushing people out of the way.
She washes her face with cold water, taking in a deep breath of hot and humid air as mascara drips down her face. She fucking hated it here. She hated the life as was. But there was no going back. Not now, not back to her mother where she’d be met with nothing but harsh words and sorrow. There was no home to go to, and for the first time in three whole months she’d felt a new and deep longing for -- belonging. She wanted to belong to something so fucking bad. Or someone. Some place, some person. She took out her phone and scrolled back up, just far enough to see a picture of her father. To see what her life used to be. She would have done anything to go back in time, to life in that moment, and stay there forever. To soak up every second of it just one more time. She would have done it all to see him again. To see her mother laugh again, to have a family. To live life without carrying that deep sunken pain. The pain which was constant. People said, when he died that, time would make it easier. But it didn’t. Time only made it harder, heavier, more...real, more prominent. There was no life without that pain. Not at the bottom of a bottle, not at the end of a joint, not after six hours of dancing out every last bit of attention there was no life, where he was back with her again. And maybe she’d not actually sat down long enough, until now, to truly realise that.
Tears roll down her cheeks and she’ll put the phone down. For some reason, the words kept going off in her head...like a sick song on repeat. ‘The world owes you nothing’. And every time the words passed her mind, her soul ached a level deeper, it hurt a little more. Because she so fucking badly wanted it to. She wanted good people to get good things. For bad people to get bad things. For shit to work out, for life to unravel as it should like...like a coherent story. But the world owed her nothing. The world just was. And she just is. And that was it.
So she made a choice. The little control that the world would allow. She wiped her tears off her face and she grabbed the stolen jacket, pushed some tuna sandwiches into her purse and set off. She walked for a while, a long fucking while. She walked and she sobered up and she let the early dawn air clear her lungs and mind. She’d reached the station, exhausted from just existing. Once again, she took out her phone.
Message: Mom 4:15am
“Coming home...”
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i know that the audacity of what im about to ask is off the charts bc you're already too good to us, writing fic left and right and updating a lot soon but im SO weak over the parenting group!AU that im right here to beg for a snippet of it, if you feel like sharing!
Haha, the audacity is not off the charts at all! I can give you a snippet! Sorry it’s coming a little later – when you sent this to me this morning, I was like ‘oh god, everything I have is too ugly to post’ haha, so it gave me an excuse to tidy up a scene I’d drafted already which is fun!
I will say as just a heads up, I’m operating now on a one-out-one-in system for multi-chaptered WIPs. So when I finish CYF (which is basically done, just got to post the epilogue!), I’ll be starting to post the pirate au, and when I finish See You in the Light, I’ll be starting to post this parents group au, and then finally when I finish If It Wasn’t for All the Lights, I’ll start to post the BDSM au! It’s probably a deeply flawed system, but it’s the one I’m going ahead with, haha.
Anyway!
A snippet of the parents group au!
“C’mon, pop,” Rio grunts, trying to get the tabs free on the side of the diaper as Marcus kicks out his legs, squirming up the back of the change mat like he’s trying to slip up on out of the thing, and shit, the last thing he needs is the kid to smear Rhea’s Earth Mama Angel Bottom Balm up the back of his new hoodie.
“I have spare diapers if you need to borrow one,” Beth says at the change table beside him, having apparently gotten Jane into her new one in record speed, and Rio lets his gaze stick for a second, watching as she makes even easier work of getting Jane’s thrashing legs back into her pink polka dot leggings, like it’s nothing at all. It’s enough to make his jaw rock, his attention twisting back to Marcus, trying to get the tab unstuck again, but his fingers are still oily with the diaper rash cream, and Marcus’ face is gettin’ redder, and he just can’t get his grip.
He tugs Marcus back towards him, dropping a hand to his son’s belly, tickling a little to try and calm him down, even as he levels Beth with an irritated look.
“Yeah, what part of this looks like the diaper’s the issue?”
Somewhere outside, he hears her friend laughing, the sound loud and warm over the pinging arcade machines and the banging of the bowling balls hitting the polished floor of the lanes, the crack of one hitting pins, and - - and he ain’t being fair.
Knows that.
It’s not her fault he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing.
Still, when he glances sideways at her again, she’s unbothered by his tone – not pissed like Rhea would be, or wounded like his ma – and something about that bothers him more than it should. Instead, Beth shrugs, fixing her gaze back down on her daughter.
“It just looks like it’s one of those organic ones, right?” she says, gently lifting Jane to put her onto her belly for a few minutes of tummy time – just like Nance had told ‘em to in class – before turning to better look at Rio, her eyes tired as she watches him yank again on the tab of Marcus’ diaper. “I tried those with Kenny, and I just find the tabs always - -”
Riiiiiiiip.
He can feel his pulse in his throat as his cream-covered fingers clench around a handful of torn diaper, can feel it even harder behind his eyes, his blood thrumming hot beneath his skin and damn, it ain’t anger, it’s just - -
Fuckin’ exhaustion.
He pulls the diaper out from underneath Marcus’ bare, wet-with-diaper-cream ass and stamps his foot hard down on the peddle of the bin beside the change table, tossing the whole damn thing in with more force than necessary, and he’s expecting Elizabeth to have that look on her face again – that one that’s some mix of pity and judgement or even worry at seein’ a guy like him snap – but it ain’t even really a look at all. She’s just magicked up one of her kids’ diapers from that Mary Poppins bag of hers, and holds it out to him.
“If you loosen the tabs and open it up a bit before you get it under him it’ll be easier too,” she offers, and Rio grunts, plucking it from her hand and fixing his attention back on Marcus’ flailing legs, sucking in a breath to calm his frayed nerves, before gently lifting his son again to get the diaper up underneath him, adjusting it to get it in the right spot, trying to avoid Marcus’ kicking feet, and it’s just - - sudden.
That’s the thing.
Because Marcus’ legs calm down right in time with Beth’s arm suddenly pressing into Rio’s, and Rio blinks up to see Beth reached over and her finger is curled in Marcus’ tiny fish, and Rio tears his confused gaze away from Beth to look up and see his son smiling, that one that makes him look like the whole damn sun, and he keeps smiling, even when he shoves his fist – still clutchin’ Beth’s finger – right up into his mouth.
And he’s gonna stop it – ain’t like he loves other people’s kids chewing on his knuckles – but he finally gets Marcus properly into the clean diaper, and before he can do anything else, Beth’s just started talking.
“That is a strong grip,” she whispers, so quiet it’s almost like she doesn’t want Rio to hear, and her voice is light and bright in a way he ain’t really used to hearing. “And very warm slobber, which is what you want from slobber. I mean, can you even imagine cold slobber? Like a ghost. I will say Billy from class has some weirdly cold slobber, so you stay away from him, mister.”
Rio just - - blinks, his brow furrows, his lips parting, but when he opens them all the way, no words come out. Instead he just stands there like a dumbass, watching this woman half-bent over her kid and his at the change table of a bowling alley, her strawberry blonde hair falling down, concealing her face so all Rio can see is his son’s, and how whatever it is she’s doing makes his son happy, and he can’t really explain any of it, but he just - -
“Oh my god, Paulie! Twins!”
“Amber, don’t - -”
Whatever Paulie was about to say is lost to the rest of the parents’ room as Rio spins to see a skinny, leggy blonde thrust a toddler with milkshake-vomit down his shirt at some guy with frosted tips like this is the fuckin’ 90s, and dart towards them in a wave of too-sweet perfume. She’s so fuckin’ quick (or maybe just - - y’know - - awake given her kid’s old enough to vomit milkshake instead of formula), instantly peering over at Marcus and Jane on the change tables, an easier feat now that Beth’s standing up again, her finger reclaimed, rolling Jane back onto her back on the mat.
Amber’s cooing is instant, and Rio sighs, grabbing Marcus’ pants from where he’d slung them over his shoulder and starting to shake them out.
“Oh my goooodddd, they’re like those ones you see on TV! Paulie!! Look!! Like, one’s just like mommy, and one’s just like daddy.”
Which - - Rio blinks, looking sideways at Beth, who just seems to be watching Amber with that same neutral, Stepford Wife-look she gets in class. Rio sets his jaw, shaking his head, as he starts to bunch the pants up in his hands, ready to put them on Marcus, opening his mouth to correct the other woman.
“Nah, they ain’t - -”
“You think so?”
The words are offered so suddenly, so sharply, that Rio’s head spins back around to look at Beth again, his eyebrows raised at her interruption, but she doesn’t look back at him, just keeps her gaze fixed on Amber. She wrinkles her nose a little, purses her lips, before dropping a hand back to the change table while leaning forwards a little, almost conspiratorially.
“We’ve been thinking about signing them up for auditions, but I don’t know,” she waves a hand suddenly at Rio, who only blinks at her. “James here thinks it might not be the best idea.”
And okay, for starters, fuckin’ James? She really wants to play him like that? But also - - just - - y’know. What the fuck? Rio stares at her, taking in her widening eyes and her baggy mama sweater that does exactly zero to hide the fact that she’s stacked, but also the fact that she’s holdin’ herself kinda different all of a sudden. Like she’s caught him looking, her gaze darts towards him, and it’s so quick he almost misses it, the way she just sort of - -
Shrugs.
Rio scoffs a little – a sound Amber clearly reads as about the audition and not about this whole damn show – and turns around, putting on a smile for Marcus as he finishes bunching up the pants and pushing them up over his tiny feet.
“Men are always weird about this stuff, but you guys should totally be auditioning them! Like, I could literally see them in commercials for formula. You know they always put the cutest ones in them, because they want to trick regular people into thinking that their product’s gonna like, magic you a better-looking baby.”
Which - - look, Rio can’t exactly say it’s a surprise. He’s pretty sure his sister changed her kids’ brand of juice because one of the ads had one of the little girl’s playin’ Daisy Doctor instead of Holly Housewife. His thoughts are interrupted though when Marcus sneezes, and Rio leans over enough to grab a tissue from Beth’s diaper bag, vaguely aware of Paulie rounding the change tables for the sink, and tugging off his own kids’ shirt and it’s really only then that Rio realises he hasn’t even blinked at the smell of vomit, which - -
Okay, actually, that could be the fifteen years working in a bar.
“You know, I think I’ve heard that,” Beth says, and the girl makes a humming noise, her bowling shoes tapping a little on the tiled floor.
“Well, that’s an insider secret for you. I lived in LA for like, ever. It was almost two years. I mean, closer to one, but that’s basically 40 Hollywood years. I even once auditioned to play a mom in a Baby’s Only commercial. I mean I didn’t get it, but I think it was because I was like, too in shape, y’know?”
Which - - shit, Rio coughs a little to cover a sound he doesn’t even know, a laugh? A scoff? Why the hell is she even talkin’ to this woman?
“Wow,” Beth says though, her voice loaded with concern. “That’s gotta be discrimination.”
“I know right?”
And it’s Jane who wobbles at least, her bottom lip quivering, her legs kicking, and Beth turns around instantly, humming softly back down at her daughter, and before Rio can help it, his gaze darts over to her, watching as her face softens, her eyes glaze over, like they do sometimes, and he thinks of saying somethin’ to her, but shit, what? He doesn’t know jack about her.
A wave of perfume hits them again, and the second he finishes getting Marcus’ pants on, picks him up, turns around at the same time Beth does with Jane, Amber’s right in front of them, her gaze darting between Jane and Marcus, like she’s not sure which one to look at first.
Finally, she just sighs, clutching a hand forlornly to her chest.
“Like, I’m not even kidding. You made two really nice babies. Like, Paulie, tell them I’m not kidding.”
Over at the sink, Paulie grunts again, holding the toddler’s shirt under a furious stream of water, and Rio stares for a minute, watching the guy morosely clean up toddler vomit while the kid licks the rim of the sink. Rio resists the urge to gag as he bounces Marcus a little on his hip.
“How’d you two even meet anyway?”
And at least that much he should’ve expected. Rio shakes his head, gaze fixing back on Amber, the words ready on his tongue, but before he can say a damn thing, Beth’s cut him off again.
“It sounds so weird, but it was actually at an underwater research center.”
Which - - okay - - what?
His gaze flicks back to Beth, but she ain’t looking back at him. She’s just got Jane curled into her chest, nestling her face into her breast, while Beth hums a little, just - - blatantly fuckin’ lying.
“I was studying - - ” outside, a bowling ball hits the floor hard. “How sound affects - -“ she fingers her pearl necklace with the hand not clutching Jane, “Oysters, because I am a scientist, and James here was researching - - ” Beth’s gaze darts around, fixing on Marcus in Rio’s arms. “Marco Polo.”
Before Rio’s even had time to catch up to that, Paulie blinks up, confused, from his spot at the sink.
“In Detroit?”
It’s enough to make Beth stutter, her eyes blinking rapidly, and he really should just leave her to fix this herself, should leave her there gaping like a fish, scrambling for the tail-end of her own lie, and get back out to the group, but - - Rio sucks in a breath - - Marcus would be bare-assed right now if it wasn’t for her.
“Nah, man, west coast. We just moved back here to be close to family with the twins,” he drawls with a shrug, and maybe that makes it worth it – how quickly Beth reels around to look at him, and - - shit, have her eyes always been that blue? Rio blinks, jerks his head back around to Amber, rolling his shoulders back to undo the sudden knot in them. “One of those things, yeah? We met workin’ out there, but turned out we were both from here.”
He means to leave it at that. Should, really, but all he can think about is her in class – prim and proper and that look again, like she’s judging him, and she got them into this, right? Before he can think twice, he drops his free hand to her lower back, smoothing it around to hold the soft hip furthest from him, smiling toothlessly as Beth stiffens and then pointedly, deliberately, relaxes, while Amber holds her hand to her chest again, hums an: “Aww, that’s how you know it’s meant to be!”
“That’s right,” Rio replies, and he watches Beth turn her face up to meet him, her gaze darting across his face like she’s trying to figure something out, and shit, he’s just trying to match what she’s laying down. After a moment, Beth spins into him, her free arm dipping around his back, and something in him sparks hot and he just - - he hadn’t known how fucking small her hands were until one squeezes at his waist.
“Right, honey,” she says, voice high and too-sweet. “I was just so lucky. And speaking of our families, we should really get back to them.”
After that, it’s easy enough to pack up the last of the diaper bags, for Amber to dip down to help Paulie and the kid, and for them to slip out again under the distraction, and it’s just fuckin’ weird, he thinks, to watch that little character Beth had invented – all ease and charm – slip off her shoulders like a cloak, and he means to let it go, because what skin is it off his nose if she’s some sort of pathological liar? But as they duck between the groups of sprawling teenagers and middle America families ordering fries and picking bowling ball weights, guys shoving each other at arcade games, and kids feeding quarters into claw machines, he just - - itches.
So maybe he steps a little slower, matching her pace, maybe he looks at her, amused, a little goading as he says: “So you in some secret, new mama improv group, or what?”
And Beth just - -
Shrugs, and shit, she doesn’t even look at him when she says:
“You don’t ever get bored of just being you?”
Rio blinks, his step slowing all over again, taking in her tired look, the diaper bag slung over her shoulder, that shirt she’s wearing, stained with grubby children’s fingers and milk, that damn new mama smell that’s always up his nose with her, and he just thinks - - nah, not really, but before he has the chance to say it, it’s like she’s read it on his face. She hoists a snuffling Jane up a little higher and moves faster than she has any right to. Back across the bowling alley, back into their lane, nestled in the shelter between her friend and her sister, away from him.
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i adore your writing and you inspire me to improve myself, which leads me to my question: what's your writing process like? i've noticed that you usually double the length of a chapter as you edit, do you leave scenes out and return to them later (when editing)? and also, i've noticed that you switch text colours as you write, is that helpful? or do you have any other tips or tricks you use that help you write? i'd love to learn more about your technique, if you don't mind sharing. 💕
i don’t really know if i have a ~process~ because i feel i do something different for each fic i write!
with A Cold Night, i did something i’ve never done before: pre-write the entire fic from beginning to end. i spent all of 2018 drafting this fic without publishing a single word, and it has helped me a lot, as something i struggle with when it comes to multichap fics is losing steam half-way through a wip
so, i spent 11 months writing the whole story, and now i have all the drafts stored safely in my google docs and once a month i pull out one chapter’s worth of material and spend the month editing and polishing it (which sometimes takes a lot of polish because these drafts were written over a year ago now!)
for the last few years, i’ve been a big proponent of not writing a story chronologically. for some people, this does not work at all, and you do need to be very careful that you still allow a character to grow organically if you’re jumping back and forth in your character’s journey. however, for me, i like writing based on whichever scene i want to write next, and then going back and filling in the gaps later. this is also the reason my drafts are full of multi-coloured text - every time i sit down and write, i colour code that “session” with text colour, just so i can visually see where there are gaps and where certain scenes start and fnish (especially useful when my individual documents are super long and it takes ages to find certain things in them lol)
editing, for me, is a very in depth process, which i know differs for a lot of people. i’ve known fic writers who edit as they go, and i’ve known other writers to let their edit just be a quick one-hour skim before they publish, but i just can’t do that. i probably spend longer editing than actually writing, but that’s entirely down to my personal style as a writer: i like layers, symbolism, foreshadowing, and syntax. the syntax element is especially important as i will fuss over paragraphs for hours just so i can get the rhythm and sound of the words correct and evocative of the mood i’m after (i read most things aloud to check sentences sound good and are audibly symmetrical and balanced, for example).
i also tend to leave a lot of gaps in my drafts - as you mentioned - so editing sometimes involves finishing scenes i never originally finished, adding in scenes i realise subsequently that i need to flesh out the pacing ... and this is why i tend to double my word counts when editing! i’m very much of the mindset that a first draft should just be “get the words on the page” even if it’s only the bare bones of an idea, and then you can come back later, view the words with fresh eyes and with the hindsight of the whole chapter, and make better edits.
once i’ve done a content edit, i will usually go back through a draft again to do a technical edit, which is where i shoot rogue adverbs and get ride of passive voice and unnecessary commas and fix my terrible spelling lmfao
hope that answers your questions! i do have a writing tag on my blog which might have some more detailed asks on this topic buried somewhere :D
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Something akin to rambling and answering questions.
flower crown: when did you last sing to yourself?
Probably when Nadine was still around. Back in those days.
I don’t know if I ever really sang to myself... if anything, I would sing to her. I like music, but I’ve never had the confidence to sing.
fairy lights: if a crystal ball could tell you the truth about anything, what would you want to know?
If there is meaning to my existence here.
daisies: what is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
I was going to say “making it out of heaven”, but in the middle of writing this I realized I did not make it out of heaven, it was not my choice to leave. I was pulled here by someone who thought I deserved a better life.
I do not know if I have accomplished anything of value.
1975: what is the first happy memory that comes to mind, recent or otherwise?
Spending time with my friend.
That was the first thing that came to mind. In the older days, playing tag with Nadine. We would race around the clouds, she would grab my ribbon and take off, sometimes passing it to Charlotte or Lasafam in a game of aerial keep-away. We laughed back then. I don’t know if I’ve seen Lasafam smile since we were young children.
matte: if you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living?
Maybe, or maybe not. It’s hard to say when you feel that way all the time, but with no evidence.
black nail polish: do you have a bucket list? if so, what are the top three things?
I don’t officially have one. But I would like to travel, and I would like to be at peace, and I would like to have friends and family.
pantone: describe a person close to your life in detail.
A ribbon of sunlight dances in her hair. She moves like the wind, sometimes playful and loud, sometimes a gentle whisper. She’s enough to knock you over, or pick you back up on your feet. But the wind always dies down eventually. And the sun never stays during the night.
moodboard: do you feel you had a happy childhood?
Ah... ha...
The times with my friends were good. It feels like I lived two very different lives - a happy life with them, and a terrible life with him.
stars: when did you last cry in front of another person?
Miss Fiona comforts me when I’m having anxiety or flashbacks. So probably her.
Back home, I’m not sure, but I’m sure it was either one of my angel friends or him. Probably him. I didn’t like showing weakness to my friends.
plants: pick a person to stargaze with you and explain why you picked them.
I would like to show my friend the stars of this world. I don’t know if he’s seen them, or looked at them closely.
Looking at the sky has always comforted me, since it’s always been my home and this sky isn’t tainted like the last one, doesn’t have any blood or tears or cigarette smoke.
converse: would you ever have a deep conversation with a stranger and open up to them?
Yes. I think that’s the best way to make a new friend. I can be shy and anxious and guarded, but when I feel like someone has a genuine interest in me as a person, my walls come down quickly.
I like to learn about other people, too. I think the myriad of different ways people can exist is beautiful and fascinating. I want to know all types of people.
handwriting: if you were about to die, and you could only say one more sentence to one person, what would you say and to whom?
... Pass.
cactus: what is your opinion on brown eyes?
They’re beautiful. They’re common here, but where I’m from they’re about as common as every other eye color under the sun. In fact, I don’t know if I can think of anyone with brown eyes off the top of my head, but they’re beautiful and mysterious and calming.
sunrise: pick a quote and describe what it means to you personally.
“And there’s a whole life there, in knowing the sun exists.”
That’s one of Killian’s favorite quotes, from one of their partner’s counterpart’s work, but it has a special meaning to me also. It reminds me of Nadine and how even when she wasn’t there, and I was missing her deeply, I knew that she was out there and that she was free and that she was not under anyone’s thumb anymore.
oil paints: what would you title the autobiography of your life so far?
I wouldn’t be so bold as to write an autobiography. There wouldn’t be anything in it worth reading.
overalls: what would you do with one billion dollars?
One billion... I would pay off all our debts and our loved ones’ debts, buy a comfortable house on a lake with a boat for the others to enjoy, save enough to live comfortably and donate the rest.
combat boots: are you a very forgiving person? do you like being this way?
It depends.
I didn’t forgive Nadine for running away. I thought that even though it was terrible, at least we had each other, and she was a traitor for trying to escape. At the same time I did, because I didn’t want her to suffer. I didn’t want anyone to suffer, but I thought maybe if we suffered together it wouldn’t be as bad.
I don’t like being that way. I’m fully glad she escaped now. And I’m glad she did whatever she did to bring me here, too. I only weep for those who were left behind.
There are some people I will never forgive.
winged eyeliner: write a hundred word letter to your twelve year old self.
No... no thanks.
pastel: would you describe yourself as more punk or pastel?
Pastel.
tattoos: how do you feel about tattoos and piercings? explain.
The thought of them gives me anxiety. I don’t like pain, and there’s an instinctive fear of changing my body.
messy bun: the world is listening. pick one sentence you would tell them.
“Be kind to each other.”
cry baby: list the concerts you have been to and talk about how they make you feel.
I haven’t been to a concert. There were sometimes choirs in heaven, but they never made me feel anything except sadness and a deep longing.
grunge: who in the world would you most like to receive a letter from and what would you want it to say?
Right now, perhaps I would like to receive a letter from Taffy, Olive, Charlotte, Lasafam, Egmont, or Rosemary, telling me that everything back home is all right and that he is gone for good.
space: do you have a desk/workspace and how is it organised/not organised?
I have a table in my room in the headspace. It has lots of books on it, and it’s not very organized but in a way that looks nice. A sort of organized chaos.
white bed sheets: what is your night time routine?
I don’t look at the stars every night, but it’s comforting to be able to look up at the sky whenever I want. Sometimes I even fall asleep on the roof in the headspace.
I like being covered in blankets, too. The angels used to sleep in a big pile sometimes, so it’s soothing.
old books: what’s one thing you don’t want your parents to know?
I don’t really have parents.
beaches: if you had to dye your hair how would you dye/style it and why?
I like my hair the way it is. I wish I could dye and style the body’s hair the same way, but that’s too specific and would only really mean something when I’m around.
eyes: pick five people to go on an excursion with you. who would you pick and where would you go/what would you do?
Nadine, Lasafam, Egmont, Rosemary, and Charlotte... just like the old days. Maybe we could go to a good city in this world, like New York or San Francisco. I would love to show them, especially since no one but Nadine has made it here.
11:11: name three wishes and why you wish for them.
I’d say they’re the same as my bucket list, and the reasoning should be obvious... I just want to be calm and happy.
painting: what is the best halloween costume you have ever put together? if none, make one up.
We angels didn’t celebrate Halloween, but if we did I’m sure Nadine and I would have confused everyone by going as each other.
lightning: what’s the worst thing you’ve ever done while drunk or high?
I don’t think I’ve ever been.
thunder: what’s one thing you would never do for one million dollars?
Go back to that world.
storms: you on only listen to one song for the rest of your life, or only see one person for the rest of your life. which and why?
Only listen to one song. Music means a lot to me, but people mean more, and I could never leave anyone behind. I didn’t...
love: have you ever fallen in love? describe what it feels like to realise you’re in love.
I have always wanted to be in love. Back home, I read romance novels on the rare occasion Egmont would go out of his way to get them for me. Yet I know too well that life will never be that way, that things won’t go picture perfect, that nothing will be written in stone before my eyes. Maybe that’s frightening, and maybe it’s exciting.
I think it would be something like hunger or thirst, but much stronger, much more potent. A feeling that every part of your body and soul is relaxed and happy and peaceful. A strong desire and a strong satisfaction at the same time. These are things I have picked up from sharing a mind with people who are deeply in love.
marble: what is the most important thing to you in your life right now?
Stability.
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Murderball ( 2005).
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Sherlolly. 33. For the theme n short fic ask
celebrity/fan au - Fun! Thanks, Gee!! This turned out a wee bit longer than I intended. Hope you like. ~Lil~ (I’ve got lots more to fill. I’m working on them and appreciate them all!)
John Watson was pissed. There were about a thousand places he’d rather be at the moment. (Like on a date with the lovely Miss Morstan, which he had to cancel when Sherlock had stormed into the clinic, demanding his presence just as he was getting ready to leave!) Riding in the back of a cab on the way to some book signing with his broody best friend was nowhere on that list.
“Are you going to explain this?” he asked.
When Sherlock had said ‘book signing’ John had waited impatiently for the upshot. Where was the murder? Where was the puzzle?
“No,” the detective answered.
The doctor clenched his fist and cracked his neck. He’s your friend. You will not strangle him in the backseat of a cab. John took in the other man’s appearance for a moment. That’s when he noticed the difference. Sherlock The Body’s Just a Transport Holmes always wore the most expensive clothes and took far too much care with his hair to really believe in that ‘beauty is just a construct’ nonsense. But today… today the man was polished within an inch of his life! Also, he was undoubtedly nervous. John couldn’t remember ever seeing the man so unsettled.
“Sherlock? Are you..?”
The detective’s head whipped toward him. “What?” he asked with thinly veiled aggression.
There is something going on here. Though Sherlock often pointed out that his friend didn’t see ‘certain things’ - not observing, he called it - John had learned a lot about the man sitting next to him in their two years of friendship. That’s when it hit him; he had to force himself not to smirk.
“Does this have something to do with that book? The pathology book?” John asked, almost certain that he had it figured out.
Baker Street was never quite ‘clean’ (even though John bitched at his friend like an old fishwife) but it was somewhat better than when he had first moved in and the man-child did make some effort to put away his toys. In the last month, however, John had often noticed a book sitting next to Sherlock’s chair. Then he noticed it in the kitchen late one night and on the settee the next afternoon. He even found it in the bathroom one day. At one point he had wondered if the detective didn’t own several copies of the damn thing.
“This isn’t a case at all. You just want to meet the author of that book.”
The detective smirked, though it lacked his usual confidence. “It seems I’m finally rubbing off on you, John. Keep paying attention and soon you’ll know the difference between a suspect and a witness.”
“At least I know who the prime minister is,” he mumbled under his breath.
Twenty-five minutes later they were walking into a small bookstore in Soho.
“Not much of a turnout,” John commented. There were no lines and the store wasn’t much bigger than the sandwich shop below their flat.
“How many people do you suppose are interested in forensic pathology?” He said the word ‘people’ like it was tantamount to a single cell organism. And one that he didn’t particularly like.
“Still…” John started as they made their way to the back of the shop. That’s when he saw her. A tiny smiling woman sitting next to a mountain of books talking to a spotty faced teenaged girl in large, ill-fitting glasses.
“… if you’re really interested, leave me your email and I’ll send you some information,” the woman said.
The girl gasped. “You’d do that?”
“Of course! I wish I had someone to point me in the right direction when I was younger. I’d love to help in any way I can,” the woman returned, smiling brightly.
“I… I…” the teen stammered. “I don’t know what to say. I mean… you’re my favourite pathologist of all time!”
Favourite pathologist? Do people have favourite pathologists? For a moment John thought the girl was going to cry, but she managed to write down her email and shake hands with the author before hurrying off to join a group of girls standing to the side. They all squealed as they left. Weird.
He was so distracted by the spectacle that he almost missed Sherlock’s approach.
“Hello, Dr. Hooper,” the detective said as he handed her his worn copy of the book.
I didn’t even notice that! Him and his damn pockets! John did notice, however, that his friend’s voice was even deeper than usual.
“Hi!” the woman said as she took the book, smiling and blushing up at his friend.
John had seen this before… many, many times. That man’s looks were such a waste! The woman I could have pulled with those damn curls! He could make a witness, of the right sexual persuasion, sing like a canary with the slightest hint of fake flirtation.
“It seems I got in right under the wire,” Sherlock said.
“Yes. You might just be my last victim,” she replied with a giggle.
When he smiled John realised that something was off. That wasn’t Sherlock’s false ‘get what he needs from a woman smile’. The man looked genuinely happy. What the hell?
“You’re much better at forensic analysis than comedy, Miss Hooper,” he said with none of the bite of his usual commentary.
Her face started to fall, but Sherlock quickly followed up with, “That wasn’t an insult. This book is brilliant, doctor. But you know that, don’t you? How many weeks has it been a bestseller?”
“A few.” She bit her lip and tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “Um, whom do I make this out to?”
Ah, John thought, who will Sherlock be today? Nigel Britwistle? Ridgewell Luckinbill, perhaps? Felix Pickles was one of his personal favourits.
“Sherlock Holmes,” he said, causing John to do a double take.
“That’s an unusual name,” Dr. Hooper said as she began to write. “Old English?”
“It is,” Sherlock answered, practically beaming.
When she finished, she handed him the book and stood up. “Well, I’m finished for today,” she said as she started to box up the books from the table.
“Did you have a good turnout?” Sherlock asked and then he did the strangest thing of all… he started to help her!
“I did, actually. About five hundred, since lunch. Yesterday’s turnout was better.”
“Yes, I had wanted to make it to your signing at Waterstone’s. Unfortunately, I had a case,” Sherlock said as he added another book to the box.
Waterstone’s? That store was huge! John was more than a bit shocked. It seemed that this Dr. Hooper was the J.K. Rowling of forensic pathology!
“A… case?” she asked. “What sort of case?”
“I’m a detective,” his friend responded far less arrogantly than usual.
“You’re a..?”
“I should clarify, I don’t work for the Yard. I’m a consulting detective. The only one in the world, actually.”
There’s the arrogance.
“Really?”
“Yes. I invented the job,” he explained as he finished up with the books. “I’d love to tell you more if you’re not busy.”
“Ahh…” She looked at John (possibly for the first time) and then back to Sherlock, seemingly a bit apprehensive.
“Coffee, I thought, if you like,” Sherlock said in a rush. “There’s a decent shop just around the corner.”
She hesitated for a moment longer before saying, “Just let me speak to the manager to let him know that I’m all finished.” She started to walk away but paused and gave them both a pointed look. “And where we’re going, of course.”
Once she was out of hearing distance, John turned to his friend. “All right. I’m flummoxed. What the hell’s going on?”
Sherlock was watching her as she spoke to the store manager. “I believe that I have a date, John. Do keep up.”
“A date? You don’t date! What do you need her for? A case?” he asked, then thought for a moment. “Oh! You found a mistake in her book and want to reopen one of her old cases.”
“That book is flawless, John. As is her work. It’s not a case.”
“Are you trying to recruit her to work at St. Barts?” Nearly everyone at the hospital basically hated the man! “I doubt she’ll give up a lucrative book deal to be your personal whipping boy, no matter how many time you use that voice on her. She seems too smart for that.”
Turning to him with a glare, Sherlock said, “Of course she’s smart, John! She’s brilliant! And I don’t need another whipping boy, I’ve got you for that. No, I need her for something else entirely.” His tone softened at the end and his face… well, that was a look John had quite literally never seen before.
“And what is that, exactly?”
Sherlock smiled brightly then turned his attention back to the woman across the store. “Pay close attention, my friend, because I believe you’ve just met the future Dr. Holmes.”
After several seconds of stunned silence, John finally found his voice. “Are you screwing with me?”
“Or perhaps I’ll take her name, who knows?”
“You’re joking!”
“There’s nothing wrong with taking the woman’s name. Don’t be so provincial.”
“I’m not talking about that, you tit!” John hissed. “Are you winding me up, because…”
“No, John,” Sherlock interrupted. “Not about this. Not about her.” He picked up his signed copy of the book and looked at the inscription with a grin before turning back to his friend. “Come with us and have one cup of coffee, then make some excuse and bugger off. Got it?”
He nodded mutely still too stunned to respond. Sherlock didn’t do relationships and had never mentioned marriage in the entire time John had know him, at least not reverently. Not only that but he had just met this woman. Even having read her book, how could he possibly be contemplating spending the rest of his life with her? It went against everything he thought he knew about the man. Then there was the woman herself. What if she was married? Or gay? What if she had a deep and burning hatred for tall, curly-haired, cocky bastards who thought they knew everything?
Just then Dr. Hooper walked back up. “Okay, Thomas knows I’m going with you so if my body turns up in the Thames, he’ll know who to blame.” She looked at John and said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name.”
Sherlock beat him to the introduction. “This is my best friend, Dr. John Watson.”
John paused before offering the woman his hand. Sherlock had never introduced John as his best friend before. Associate, blogger, assistant and even friend on the very rare occasion, but never ‘best friend’. Finally extending his hand he said, “Nice to meet you, doctor. Sherlock is a big fan of yours.” He was proud of managing that much in his shocked state.
She blushed as released him to pick up her coat and bag. “Nice to meet you too.”
Once she was ready, the three of them proceeded out of the store and onto the pavement. John hung back, letting the pair walk in front of him so that he could observe them. A tiny part of him wanted to see the detective crash and burn, knowing for a fact that Sherlock knew nothing about women, at least nothing about how to date them.
“So, did you have questions about the book?” she asked.
“Not so much, no.”
She didn’t respond, just looked up at the detective curiously.
“I’d actually like to know more about you, if I’m honest.”
“There’s not much to tell, Mr. Holmes.”
“I beg to differ. And please, call me Sherlock.”
“Oh, well, then you should call me Molly, I suppose,” she replied with an awkward laugh. “What would you like to know?”
John wondered as well. Sherlock usually knew whatever he deemed important about a person at first glance.
“Everything, I should think. But let’s start with how you got that scar on your left index finger. It’s not a scalpel cut, far too ragged.” He stopped walking and took her hand in his to study closer. “Too old as well. You were eleven? Perhaps twelve.”
“Yes,” the woman answered breathlessly.
Sherlock gently ran two fingers across the old scar then looked up. “A soup can,” he said with a knowing smirk on his lips.
Dr. Hooper had never taken her eyes off of his face the entire time. “How did..?”
“It’s my job to know, Molly. And I’ll tell you all about it.” He started walking but didn’t release her hand.
“You will?” she asked, seemingly unconcerned that she was now holding hands with the man that she’d just met.
“Indeed. But I believe that we have plenty of time for that.”
“What does that mean, exactly?”
“Come now, you’re the famous writer, Molly. Can’t you see that this is just the first page of the book?”
John never knew why Sherlock had brought him that day and he certainly didn’t know why he’d been allowed to witness such an overtly romantic display, but he was grateful nevertheless.
Besides, it made his best man’s speech a breeze to write.
Thanks again, Gee! Love you!
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The Cello Player | Part 2
Brian x Reader/You Third Person P.O.V fluff/angst(???) Summary: (Y/N) is a flute player who attends the same music university as Brian, a talented cello player. Their horribly strict conductor pairs them up to play many duet pieces for the upcoming concert as well as playing with the full orchestra. (Y/N) struggles with the heavy workload as Brian helps her through the stress. 1846 Words Updated: 21st May 2017
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
Established religion / Story inspired by the movie ‘Whiplash’
The conflict that happened between Brian and Linda happened days ago. Linda was especially peeved at the fact she couldn’t call out Brian for anything because his playing was too perfect. He adapted easily to the environment. Everyone almost relaxed because she was too focused on trying to catch him out.
Their first meeting happened later that day, after Linda’s morning practice. They found an empty room after searching the full of the campus. However, just as (Y/N) was going to start tuning her instrument for the second time that day, Brian’s voice had stopped her.
“First things first,” he started as he sat on the piano stool. “What’s your name? I don’t exactly like the nickname Linda has for you.” She stayed silent but he waited patiently. If he needed to, he would wait all day to just get her name.
The silence continued. She began to shift on the spot uncomfortably, looking all around the room they were in. There was nothing much to it, a mirror that faced the door with the piano to the left of it and random motivational music posters dotted around the room. The right side of the room only had a few extra chairs scattered all over the place. It wasn’t too long before she finally caved and mumbled her name. Brian managed to catch it – he tried his best to do so to avoid her feeling more uncomfortable.
“Thank you,” he said. “I just… I didn’t want to call you ‘Voiceless’. I’m sorry to have made you do that, I won’t do it again. If you don’t want to say anything then just signal to me or something.” Brian looked at the ground briefly, then back up but his eyes never went higher than the silver chain that rested on her neck. “Sorry, what’s on your necklace?” His voice was soft when he spoke to her as though he was trying to not scare her away.
(Y/N) looked down to see what he was talking about. She almost forgot about the necklace that she wore every day for five years. It became a part of her daily routine that she never thought about it anymore. She unclipped the chain from around her neck and gave it to Brian for him to look at. He studied the pendant carefully and soon realised what it actually was.
“You go to Church?” Brian asked handing her the necklace back. She shook her head in response and put her necklace back on.
“Not anymore,” she said quietly. “I stopped going when I kind of stopped speaking. A few years ago.” Anger flashed on his face as he muttered something under his breath. In that moment, he looked like he wanted to break something.
“Let me take you to a service this Sunday,” he offered. As soon as she was about to protest, he cut her off. “It doesn’t matter whether or not I believe, I want you to put time back into your life and religion rather than using it all to make that bitch happy. I want you to start living for yourself rather than living for her.” She was speechless. Not the speechless she was before; she couldn’t believe that someone she had only just met a few days ago was so keen on changing her life for the better.
“Why,” was all she managed to ask. So many questions she had were hidden inside that one word. Brian abruptly stood up from the stool. He wanted to shout, make her realise what he wanted to do for her and for what reason. Instead, his shoulders relaxed and he spoke with his usual calm voice.
“You can’t live life when you’re being controlled by others,” he sat back down on the stool. “I’ve seen it happen with my own two eyes and it’s not pretty. I don’t want to see it happen again. I look at you and think ‘What makes her, her?’. You play the flute and you’re religious, that’s all I can get from you – one of which I j had only just figured out. I’m sorry to say this but, you don’t show a personality. You’ve hidden everything about you from the world, how is anyone ever going to approach you? Even the clothes you wear; they’re just plain. Let me help you, please.”
She said nothing more, only nodded at his offer. She finally began her tuning, Brian playing different notes for her to match with.
“Can you play me a C-two?” Brian asked once they had swapped places. He still polished his cello every time he took it out of its case. (Y/N) looked at the keyboard in front of her. Her face was full of confusion as her finger hovered over middle C. C-four. She only knew that note from hearing it so often and figured out how the pedals worked. A sigh of relief escaped her as she pressed on the C note two below middle C. The note blended with the sound of the cello but the look on Brian’s face showed that he wasn’t satisfied. “Once more, please.” And so, she did. He showed her what notes to play after watching her confusion. It was hard to hide the smile on his face.
Afterwards, he rummaged through his case to find the sheets he was looking for. (Y/N) couldn’t even count how many sheets he had taken out on both hands. Of course Linda would give them this much to do. He has also taken out a music book filled with circled songs that Linda had told him to go over, which was basically every song in the book minus one or two.
The song they chose to start with was one (Y/N) had never heard, and so it seemed that Brian had never either. It was one that started off with a cello solo. (Y/N) paid close attention to his playing but he still wasn’t letting his feelings show. Why would he rant on so much about feeling in music when he never played with that style himself? She got too concentrated that she almost forgot to join in with her part.
The mixed sound of a flute and cello was foreign to their ears. It sounded as though they maybe shouldn’t go together, but they did. The airy sound of the flute complimented the almost strained sound of the cello. The deep notes and the high notes shouldn’t have worked, yet, it kind of did. A lot of work was needed to be out into these to change ‘kind of’ into a ‘definitely’.
They had finished some hours later, still only with few words exchanged. (Y/N)’s bag felt much heavier with the new sheet music he had given her. A lot of practice was going to be done to at her dorm if they were going to be able to play all of them at the final concert. Of course, that was what Linda intended. She never gave out sheet music for the sake of it.
Brian walked (Y/N) back to her dorm before he planned an arrangement to pick her up on Sunday to take her to the church service as he promised. (Y/N) didn’t like the feeling in her stomach, whether it was the fact that she didn’t want to waste his time or if she was excited. These were both a stranger to her, she didn’t know how to handle it. Instead of asking questions, she went back to her dorm after she watch Brian leave campus.
Sunday came around quicker than expected after many hours spent with Brian before and after the orchestra practice. They had grown closer to each other. She shared more words with him and he started to relax more around her. The confident manner he had when he first showed up in Linda’s hall was back. However, even though (Y/N) spoke more around him, Linda was still a whole different story.
When (Y/N) left her dorm block, Brian was already waiting for her. Together, they walk to the on-campus church. It felt weird walking around like this. How long had it been since she walked outside without carrying her flute case?
The church was difficult to miss but Brian managed to. He walked by it, completely oblivious to its beautiful existence. (Y/N) had to physically direct him towards its front doors as she giggled lightly to herself, hoping he never noticed.
Inside was just as beautiful as the outside, maybe even more so. Large pillars reached the high ceiling and the stained-glass windows shone colour onto the floors. A large organ sat to the side of the altar. She missed the sound of the organ playing the hymns while everyone else sang along. The place was familiar to her – she had been a few times when she first started – but after a few years of avoiding the place, she felt out of place. She knew that wasn’t true. Everyone was welcome under the roof of God. Rather, she felt as though she should have been doing something else. Practising flute.
On instinct, she searched around the large room looking for Linda. Brian managed to grab her attention and shake his head at her. She wasn’t here. She didn’t attend church. Linda wasn’t religious. (Y/N) smiled, apologising to God for thinking such thoughts under his roof.
They sat down on an empty bench row near the back. The church was filled with mostly lecturers and older staff, they never recognised the handful of students that were dotted around the place. With a few moments of silence, the service finally began.
(Y/N) listened carefully to the words the priest was saying. She called back the responses absentmindedly. She missed this. A part of her life was completely forgotten. A part of her life was brought back because of the man sitting beside her.
During the first hymn, (Y/N) sang along with the rest of the church. However, during the second hymn, Brian’s voice joined in with her. She glanced up at him and smiled widely. His voice was angelic. He was gifted with music. That was what (Y/N) believed. His beliefs in the matter were different. He didn’t see them as gifts, he saw them as talent, just as others were talented with drawing and languages and numbers. Gifts were something from God; talents were something you worked to improve. Nobody was born playing the cello.
The service was over too soon for (YN)’s liking but she still walked out of those church doors feeling refreshed. Brian did too, in a way. He had just spent a full hour staring at the girl sitting next to him. He had treated her to lunch after the service, enjoying watching her have no stress around her for one day.
From that point onwards, they had decided that Sunday would be the day they wouldn’t work on any pieces and rest. Much to God’s plan.
#day6writersnet#day6network#young k#day6#day6 young k#day6 fanfic#day6 fluff#young k fanfic#young k fluff#lol this part was ehhhh#moving the story forward#showing friendship#pls accept my trash#with love#1am you know what that means?#trash fic part :)))))#<3#omg I didn't even put in the 'brian' tags stuff idfhusdghao#brian kang#kang younghyun#brian kang fanfic#brian kang fluff#eh I'll proof read later
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Theory Time: The Big Question
What is consciousness? How does it exist? Why?
Before I start I want to make it clear that I am not a neuroscientist, quantum physicist or religious philosopher. Please don't expect me to treat this as a serious scientific paper. It's just a train of thought. So forgive the very amateur outlook and language I have on the topics I hope to discuss. I hope to bring you on the mental journey I went through to discover what I now hold as a believable, however un-intuitive theory on how the world works.
Consciousness in the Brain:
One of the worst/best ideas I ever had was when I started thinking about consciousness and the human brain. I do not really believe in a soul in the heavenly sense, so instead, I believed that the answer to consciousness must reside somewhere in the human brain. A book by the polish writer Stanislav Lem, called "Peace on Earth" (Pokoj na Ziemi) a protagonist returns to earth with partial memory loss caused by a wound that separated his right and left brain hemispheres. To continue his journey he must communicate with his right brain hemisphere. This idea fascinated me, and what astonished me most was that this was based off a real-life phenomenon - Split Brain Syndrome (SBS). Usually found in people who have undergone brain surgery to treat epilepsy, SBS is when the two sides of the brain are severed from each other and cannot internally communicate.
Does the "soul" or the conscious part of the brain remain in one place? Or does it split in two? Reality is really very close to what Stanislav Lem described. The left part of our brain is responsible for speech and facial recognition, and the one us onlookers can communicate easiest with (by talking). It is also responsible for the control of the right side of the body (including the eyes), and vice versa for the left. My question was what makes these now separate brains the same person? What makes them different? Should I treat them as two people? After a typically post-millennial teenager google search I found sources that could help me understand. Youtube videos, medical papers, newspapers. Wow, what a power the internet has. I came to the conclusion that there are two things that make an individual different from another individual:
-Conflicts of Experience-
You and me see from different perspectives, and that's part of what gives us our individuality. Various experiments showed that people living with SBS could often come to conflicts of experience with right and left brains. When told to look at a single dot in the middle of a screen, with words and images popping up on the left or right of the dot, the left brain (responsible for speech) could tell us verbally what it saw on the right. However, when it saw something on the left, they couldn't verbally tell us what it was, but with their left hand could draw it. The Right Brain was communicating. The right brain experienced something the left did not! However this was just a lack of internal communication, doesn't mean its a different person right? This brings me onto my next point.
-Conflicts of Opinion-
The Different experiences people have fundamentally change what they think and the way they think. What separates my mind from yours is what we see and how we see it, and to the peril of the world, every person has a different view point. The two sides of the brain in a person with SBS is no different. And the two brains (halves of a brain) have now been proven to experience things differently. They see out of different eyeballs, recognise people differently, control different tasks. So do they have different opinions then surely? A neuroscientist Rhawn Joseph observed a patient having literal conflicts between left and right. The left hand would carry out actions contrary to the left hemisphere's motives. For example, the left hand turning off the television immediately after the right hand turned it on like an old bickering couple. It went so far that the patient’s left leg would try and walk in a different direction to the right! The conflict was so irritating to the patient that he even stated "I hate this hand" as his left hand struggled with his right. Like two individuals fighting in one body. This is often called "Alien Hand Syndrome", found in some people with SBS.
The important conclusion that I drew from these thoughts and research is that consciousness can be split. I saw no reason to consider the left or right as the same individual. It ticked all the boxes of separate "souls" as far as I was concerned.
The fact that consciousness can be split is an important step in me coming to my final conclusion. It completely went against my prior belief in the fact that we are individual souls. This is because if there's a connection between two 'individuals' (left and right) they can act as a single individual, as shown by you and me with our perfectly intact *corpus callosum*s between the two hemispheres of the brain. What's to stop some crazy Frankenstein-like scientist to connect two full human brains together with some more neural connections? Wouldn't this also create a functioning single consciousness? Is the simple lack of being physically connected to you what makes me and you separate people?
Consciousness in the rest of the universe:
Then my inquiry turned to AI. Would connecting an artificial computer to a brain do the same thing? Is a computer conscious? This was quickly going down a rabbit hole that was going to be very tricky to navigate. The ability of something that is created by humans becoming conscious has been in the dreams of scientists and sci-fi nerds for decades if not centuries. Why would an organic computer be any different from one created by machines in its ability to contain consciousness? Its complexity? Where would the line in the scale of complexity lie? There's machines more self-aware than worms, that process information more complexly than worms, are they more conscious than worms? I started to notice a pattern in this. Information was being collected and used to form behaviour. From hard-wired instincts (solid code) to more complex learnt behaviour (self-programming). At this point I yet again went on a tangent, what made it 'ethical' to just turn a computer on/off. I decided that it was the lack of a self-preservation emotion that animals have, but that's a topic for another day.
Information being exchanged (or taken in) was clearly a fundamental part of experience, and thus of consciousness. This is because if we experience nothing, we can think nothing right? What about dreaming? (I imagine all these questions are getting tiresome- blame my English teachers, according to them rhetorical questions are an "engaging writing technique") My answer to dreaming was that although there is no external stimulus that we experience, we have dreams as a way of getting stimulus out of our own mind and memory - our imagination. So I concluded from that, that for consciousness to arise there must be an exchange of information. That would make sense to me. Our brains take in a lot of information through their sensory organs, but also from within themselves - memories being one of the more obvious examples, as well as imagination (the ability to create new stimulus from mixing and filling gaps of old information, which is what computers can now do with the help of machine learning - exciting stuff)
If a baby had developed in the womb in a coma, I theorised it'd be brain-dead, it wouldn't dream or be conscious in any way. This means that the flow of information is required to begin consciousness. In fact, maybe information IS consciousness. This meant that not just electrical signals were conscious, but everything that interacted with anything else. An analogue computer like ones designed by Babbage (look him up he's really cool) is just materials exerting forces on each other, so transferring information. Does this mean tectonic plates are conscious in a simplistic way as they exert forces on each other? Does this mean atoms in the air are conscious as they exert pressure on the walls of a balloon?
I wondered what this meant for the idea of a soul, and I had an epiphany. As someone who grew up in the western world, the soul is highly specific to people, and it's very individualised. "Save your soul by Jesus" etc. I realised that my idea was evolving more towards eastern ideologies. Buddhism and Hinduism both belief in a version of the "great one/unit" or "Brahman". Instead of heaven, your soul will join the great singular soul of the universe. This started to make sense to me. Consciousness is unified when information is compiled, individuality is lost when you are connected to the rest of the universe. This was a nice thought, but instead of becoming part of the Brahman, I believe it's the opposite when you die your consciousness stops being so complex from all the compiling of information that was happening in your brain. The stream of ever evolving information stops. Consciousness dies with death. Oh well, I didn't believe in an afterlife anyway.
I hit this point in my thoughts on this subject about a year ago and hit a plateau. I thought this was the end-point of my journey, so I started trying to explain it to my poor friends - they didn't really listen. I'm like a less cool Jaden Smith. I was wrong about this being the end-point. Recently, I watched a TED-talk by David Chalmers (100% watch it) and was absolutely delighted with what he said. He came to it through a completely different path came to the same conclusion, and unlike the unprofessional and boring me gave it a cute little name. Panpsychism. The idea that all information transferred is conscious to an extent. What a relief, I'm not crazy.
Essentially, your body and brain is a TV screen (Thank you, David Chalmers, for this analogy), through which the universe can experience YOUR movie. You ARE the universe and you're simply experiencing the "movie" through all your senses and emotions.
You think things have been weird so far? Well, they're about to get even weirder. When I said I watched a TED-talk, I meant I watched about 5 hours worth of Ted-talks. Quantum Physics was on my mind. A quantum particle can act like a wave or a particle (or both) depending on whether it is being observed or not. In other words, whether it is passing on information onto another body or not. See where I'm going with this? The presence of consciousness is when information is being passed on, so the particle acts differently when it is 'conscious' or isn't. {more stuff - research}
I think it is important to distinguish consciousness and human experience. I feel that we, as writers and scientists and members of the sci-fi nerd community put too much human signature onto the way we define consciousness. What I mean by this is that we hold how we measure consciousness to a human standard. The Turing test, to see if a computer is truly self-aware, tests if the machine can convince a person that it is actually a human. I don't think this is a fair test as many of our logical pathways and behavioural norms are either evolutionary or societal. A sentient being does not have to emulate the human mindset, it may have entirely different ways to sense information and entirely different ways of processing it.
#consciousness#science#philosophy#essay#sci-fi#soul#stanislavlem#neuroscience#neurosurgery#turing test#stanislav lem#artificial intelligence#ai#theory#hear me out#opinion#too many tags#late night thoughts#panpsychism#metaphysics#metapsychology#new account#new content#text#thoughts#think
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Episode 131 : Strange Times
"History repeats what you refuse to learn about."
- Planet Asia
Another month inside, which I'm sure is a test of patience for many. It's been an odd one, which feels like it hasn't been any less busy than normal, and so the rhythm of podcast production has pretty much been as usual. The selection ranges from some of my earliest, brokest vinyl purchases to the latest releases of the digital age - hope you all find something in there that makes you rewind (and then buy an album)!
Rest In Power to Arch Stanton of Mothership Connection, Bill Withers, Ebow of Foreign Beggars, Fred the Godson, and Stezo...
As mentioned in the show, I'm now on Twitch : twitch.tv/airadam13
Twitter : @airadam13
Playlist/Notes
Kam ft. Xzibit and Maskerade : Nowhere
I was looking for Kam's debut album "Neva Again" on Spotify and had no joy, but this turned up and has been getting a lot of play since then! 2016s "Mutual Respect" clearly needs an end-to-end listen if this is the standard - a quality song, dark and brooding, castigating the fairweather friends who gas young men up into committing all kinds of crimes but then abandon them to a life in the system. The production from Jmyth and Tariqbeats - who as far as I know, have no credits anywhere else at all - is perfect for the theme.
Jake One : Dawkinss
It's hard to find good instrumentals in this speed range that aren't heavy synth/trap-based (which is sometimes what you want, but not in this spot), but Jake One's free "#prayerhandsemoji" has come through a few times on that score!
UGK : Use Me Up
The first of the month's Bill Withers inclusions, Pimp C shows that he knows not to mess with a good thing as he lifts the groove of the 1972 hit single "Use Me" from the "Still Bill" LP, as well as the theme! C was always a producer with a deep love and appreciation for soul and funk, who wasn't afraid to bring in live instruments when he needed to, and he adds a little guitar and organ flavour to this tune from their 1992 debut "Too Hard To Swallow".
GQ : Rated Oakland
Low and slow (J.U.S.T.I.C.E League and 8 Bars on the beat), no hook, no wasted time. No-gimmick emceeing from a no-nonsense city, as GQ says what he has to say in barely two minutes on the title track from his debut album. The title track is often the big centrepiece, so it shows a lot of confidence to keep it so brief and concentrated.
Kid Frost : No Sunshine
This is a track from my early vinyl buying days, when I was pretty broke and if I saw something in the bargain bins from someone that had been mentioned in Hip-Hop Connection, I picked it up! Kid Frost (now Frost) was already ten years deep into his career at the time 1992s "East Side Story", from which this is drawn, was released, and he represented hard for his Mexican heritage at a time when Latino rappers were rare. This track reflects a side of the gang culture that is such a significant part of LA life for many, participants or otherwise; the other side of an explosion of anger is more often than not a lifetime of regret.
RZA : My Lovin' Is Digi
The Wu's takes on love songs are always a little different! The "RZA as Bobby Digital in Stereo" LP is 22 years old this year, but this is the first time we've gone to it on the podcast; it won't be the last, though. Classic 70s soul sampling on this one, self-produced by RZA as you'd expect.
DJ Quik : Quik's Groove II
Every album, DJ Quik gifts us an instrumental number that shows off his level of musicality - this one was released all the way back in 1992, as part of his second LP "Way 2 Fonky".
Brand New Heavies ft. Gang Starr : It's Gettin' Hectic
We step outside the Gang Starr catalogue for a track that may have passed you by if you didn't happen to be listening deeply in the early 90s. The 1992 "Heavy Rhyme Experience, Vol.1" album saw BNH, the London acid jazz and funk group who were getting big respect after their debut, slightly alter course and collaborate with Hip-Hop crews for their sophomore release. This was a pioneering album, which even preceded Guru's "Jazzmatazz" series. He's the perfect MC for this collaboration, and sounds more than comfortable doing his thing over a live band!
Voodoo Black ft. Leaf Dog : Fall Back
Played them last month, but had to give you one more taste of Voodoo Black in case you hadn't got the "Sitting At The Table" album yet! The mic killers from Manchester bring in Leaf Dog from The Four Owls, who complements them well on some straight Hip-Hop business. I love how DJ Cutterz has the kick drum and bassline working on this track, and the scratch work is polished too. Big ups!
Prince Po : Mecheti Lightspeed
I was pleasantly surprised to find that I'd never included the vocal version of this before! Madlib is on the beat, giving this often-overlooked half of Organized Konfusion some smooth heat. This is from the B-side of the "Holla" 12", but both tracks are also on the 2006 "Prettyblack" album.
Maffew Ragazino, Action Bronson, and Torae : Avatar
Pete Cannon on the beat! Blackpool may not be the first place you'd expect a fierce Hip-Hop producer to emerge from, but he's been doing his thing for years and has worked with some highly respected artists. This 2014 single from "Brownsville's Jesus" is wall-to-wall NYC on the mic - and for my money, Torae was the right choice to bring it home on that third verse.
BoomBaptist : Razzle Dazzle
Agent J of Groovement put me up on this Texas-based producer when he announced his "Boom Shakalaka" LP, all about the beloved video game "NBA Jam" - I certainly remember emptying my shallow pockets into that one as a teen :) BoomBaptist lives up to his name with the vibes, so if you like good beats and/or remember the 90s well, check the album!
Levelz : LVL09
If you're not used to hearing some of the MC styles on this record, prepare to have your face blown back! This Manchester crew is made up of a ton of artists who are stars in their own right, and the combination over the Metrodome-produced beat here is devastating. When the rapid spitting happens, what should strike you is the clarity - you can hear every word, every syllable even. Get this as a "name your price" on Bandcamp, and don't be shy to put a little something in!
Curren$y : Empire Monopoly
Short, but a better track in my opinion than Max B's "We Got Doe", which was the source for the Dame Grease-produced beat. It runs at a perfect pace for Curren$y, who spits a mix of his trademark lifestyle rap, street business, and Boardwalk Empire references on this standout from the "Return To The Winner's Circle" mixtape.
Ty ft. Mpho : Brixton Baby
Get well soon Ty! I thought I'd dip into his most recent album "A Work Of Heart" for this episode, and we have a ode to his place of birth as well as the adopted home of Mpho, the guest vocalist. Ty also built the foundation of the beat, then built on by Drew Horley, Akwasi Mensah and Julien Siegel. The combination of all the artists give the neighbourhood the love it deserves!
Planet Asia & 38 Spesh : God Degree
I can't even remember what lead me to this one via Spotify, but it's always good to hear new Planet Asia. The new "Trust The Chain" album is completely produced by 38 Spesh, and I love his beat here, regal dopeness that gives Asia's conscious rhymes a fitting backdrop.
Leavv : Valley (Original Mix)
Germany's Leavv is no joke when it comes to the "chill-hop" vibes that have become popular on long streaming Youtube mixes over the last few years. His work is crisp, clean, and refreshing as a nice tonic water on this track from the 2018 "Mind Garden" album!
Bill Withers : Grandma's Hands
Some of you will know this song very well, while others will have had a flash of realisation from the very first bar! Yes, this was famously sampled for Blackstreet's "No Diggity", but it's a truly great record in its own right. A single from 1971's "Just As I Am", this is just raw soul, and a record many of us can relate to - if not about grandparents, perhaps other elders who are no longer with us.
Please remember to support the artists you like! The purpose of putting the podcast out and providing the full tracklist is to try and give some light, so do use the songs on each episode as a starting point to search out more material. If you have Spotify in your country it's a great way to explore, but otherwise there's always Youtube and the like. Seeing your favourite artists live is the best way to put money in their pockets, and buy the vinyl/CDs/downloads of the stuff you like the most!
Check out this episode!
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The Best Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas For Her 2020
So you’re in need of a Valentine’s Day gift, which means at some point you did something right. You followed our style guides, the hair was on point, you didn’t overdo it on the aftershave and you got yourself a girl. Huzza! But that doesn’t mean the hard work is over, dear reader.The relationship assault course is littered with the bodies of men who fell at this crucial hurdle by blindly feeling their way through a department store make-up counter. Fortunately, we’ve got your back with the best Valentine’s Day gifts that aren’t a crappy box of chocolates.An Update On A Classic ScentEvery woman is unique, but fortunately for those who’ll be buying Valentine’s Day gifts, they do share a few common traits. One, unsurprisingly, is that they like things that smell good (who doesn’t). So save on the guesswork and snap up a fragrancelike Marc Jacobs’ Daisy Love, an update on their best-selling Daisy perfume. Adorably packaged with an oversized daisy top, the bottle will look nice on her bathroom shelf while its fresh floral fragrance of daisy tree petals will work year-round.Buy Now: £78.50 for 100mlInstagram’s Hottest ToteHer insatiable lust for light luggage creates the perfect window for you to earn some brownie points with a bag-shaped romantic gesture. Brazilian brand Nannacay’s eye-catching woven totes stole everyone from Millie Mackintosh’s to countless bloggers’ hearts last year. Our pick is embellished with blue and teal pompoms and guaranteed to go down a treat.Buy Now: £49Something Nice For Her Coffee TableSpark her creative side with this inside look into the lives of the most iconic and influential creative directors by Kinfolk creator Nathan Williams. With over 90 influential profiles of figures in the fields of fashion, publishing, and entertainment, she’s sure to recognise industry stalwarts — and the bright red cover will add a spot of colour to her decor regardless of how often she opens it.Buy Now: £22.75Timeless FramesYou don’t need to look outside to know it’s still properly winter in the northern hemisphere. However, as A-Listers and people with hangovers will attest to, sunglasses are so much more than a one-season accessory. Aside from damaging UV rays being year-round, helping your other half get ahead of the game with these mega-cool contrast colour-tinted shades will save you from being dragged shopping come spring. And of course nothing says “I love you” like the implication of a holiday…Buy Now: £196.00A Case For Her Most Prized PossessionGiven that it’s now completely normal for a mobile phone to set you back several months’ rent, it’s little wonder protecting it becomes priority number one. Help keep her tech tip-top while also giving it a visual upgrade with this flowery option with gold-coloured edging. More than just a pretty cover, there are also usefully placed magnets which mean that when she’s on a call, the case stays securely in the open position with the front held back, instead of flapping around. You’re pretty much guaranteed to come up smelling of roses.Buy Now: £45.00Romance In A (Nail Polish) BottleTo most men, nail polish may not seem like the most exciting gift in the world, but it’s usually an altogether different story for the fairer sex. This deep, dark shade of red practically has romance and passion written all over it. Lazy present? Yeah, probably. Will it work, though? Yeah, probably.Buy Now: £13.50A Seriously Solid Blow DryWith all the ongoing advancements in technology, coupled with the desire of electronics companies to stay one step ahead of the competition, it’s become something of a challenge to find a hair dryer that doesn’t require a PhD in engineering to operate (we’re looking at you, Dyson Supersonic). Save her a fortune in blow-dries by buying her one of the most solid hair dryers around.Buy Now: £39.99A Wooly Winter StapleFew things are as cuddle-inducing as taking your Valentine’s Day activities outside, but nothing kills the mood quite like frostbite. Plan ahead for a walk in the park by buying her this cable knit pom pom hat, which will still be a sound investment the next time winter rolls round.Buy Now: £27.00A Brow UpgradeWhile you yourself may not be particularly well-versed in the intricacies of slap, the good people over at MAC certainly are. So long as you steer clear of foundation or anything else that needs to be matched to her skin tone, you really can’t go far wrong here. If you’re still struggling to decide, we’d suggest this all-in-one eyebrow kit. An on-point choice, if we do say so.Buy Now: £22.50A Brand New Pair Of JeggingsProviding she wears clothes, she will have a pair of form-fitting jeggings. You will probably have seen them in droves, tucked into ankle boots or knee-high boots or literally any other type of boot come winter. But the most fundamental part of a woman’s cold-weather wardrobe can always use an upgrade. So keep things current for her with a brand new pair, like these timeless ones from TopShop. A name she’ll definitely recognise and love.Buy Now: £18.00Something For Her WristThere’s no one that doesn’t benefit from an elegant timepiece as a gift on Valentine’s Day. No longer will calls for the shower to be vacated be met with cries of “sorry, I’ll be another 15 minutes yet, I didn’t realise the time,” and she’ll get a shiny new watch under £100 from respected yet wallet-friendly brand Timex. Everyone’s a winner.Buy Now: £37.99Something For Her WallsIf you’ve heard the word “Tiffany’s” being muttered by your partner in recent weeks, there are some big expectations this Valentine’s Day. To swerve any sizeable bank dents, act the fool and buy this canvas print of one of the most stylish films of all time: Breakfast At Tiffany’s. Phew.Buy Now: £14.99Not Just A Dozen RosesRoses on Valentine’s Day may be a bit of a cliché — okay, a lot of a cliché — but that doesn’t mean women don’t still want to receive them. Up the ante by adding a dozen to the traditional 12, and you’ll be in her good books in no time. We promise the good folk at Serenata will arrange them way better than you ever could using flowers from the garden that you hacked up with the kitchen scissors.Buy Now: £39.99Bedazzle Her EarsEven the most hairy-arsed, beer-swilling, football-loving, wood-working man’s man should be able to recognise that this is one seriously nice set of earrings. And if you’re sold on them, imagine what your significant other will think. Just make sure she actually has her ears pierced before you go splashing your cash. Otherwise, you could be out of pocket and in for a rather awkward Valentine’s Day.Buy Now: £70.00Something For Her To Slip IntoMake this the year you swallow your fear and brave the lingerie section alone. Just remember to give the customary nod and grimace of acknowledgement to any other lost souls you happen to make eye contact with (we’re all in the same boat, after all). Alternatively, you could save yourself the trauma and buy your (and by “your” we mean “her”) lingerie online. Not quite as courageous though, is it? Regardless of your embarrassment meter, this pick can work equally well as a cosy pyjama as it does lingerie, so there’ll be no “you bought me lingerie?!” complaints.Buy Now: £38.60A Hot Take On A TrendUnless you’re utterly hopeless, you’ve probably picked up on the fact that many women have a certain fondness for footwear. And that leopard print is mega in. If you’re not utterly hopeless, then you’ve probably already figured out that this fondness makes a pair of leopard print shoes an excellent option when it comes to buying presents. Opt for this pair from Kurt Geiger (double fashion points) and you’ve bought yourself a one-way ticket to gratitude city, population: you.Buy Now: £49.00A Fire That Keeps On Burning (Sort Of)Can’t afford a romantic spa break? Fear not. Recreate the relaxation of a luxurious and calming pampering session at home by firing up this specially formulated de-stressing candle from Neom Organics. It might not be quite as lavish, but it’s the best you’re going to do for £16. Besides, who doesn’t like posh candles?Buy Now: £16.00 Source link
source https://www.kadobeclothing.store/the-best-valentines-day-gift-ideas-for-her-2020/
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How content marketing drives sales
These days, content marketing is marketing. Modern buyers know an advertisement when they see one, and more often than not, they’re not interested in hearing a sales pitch. Content solves this problem by creating value for buyers before they make a purchase – sometimes before they’ve even considered making a purchase.
Content that answers questions, addresses pain points or provides relevant information is content that buyers want to read. Brands that can provide helpful and insightful content are more likely to appeal to people who are ready to make a purchase.
In short, content marketing supports sales goals by:
Bringing relevant buyers to your website;
Nurturing leads with important information;
Improving brand awareness and recall;
Establishing thought leadership and authority;
Increasing buyer engagement with your brand;
Creating personalised buyer experiences.
Considering these benefits, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that B2B marketers are increasing their spend on content creation in 2019, according to the latest findings from the Content Marketing Institute. In fact, the most successful marketers spend 40% or more of their budget on content strategy.
However, content without a strategy behind it isn’t much better at driving sales than a flier stapled to a telephone pole. (Well, maybe it is, I haven’t done the research.) To be effective, marketers must think about how their content satisfies their readers’ interests, and systematise the way they appeal to their audience to move them closer to a transaction.
Marketing flywheels, funnels and buyer journeys
Marketers have different ways of thinking about their content marketing strategies. Some like to imagine their content as milestones along the buyer journey; others prefer to construct a marketing funnel that encourages prospects to take steps toward a purchase decision; others yet use Rand Fishkin’s marketing flywheel model to build momentum over time.
There’s no one right way to utilise content marketing to drive sales, but whatever model you use should be consistent with itself. To explain, let’s briefly examine these three models.
The buyer journey
In this model, prospects are like the main character of an epic journey. Rather than traveling across foreign lands at great peril, buyers are lost in the wilderness of the web, searching for answers that will solve their problems.
Like a knight errant finding a worn and moss-covered signpost at a fork in the trail, buyers approach content as helpful assets that will speed their journey to its conclusion. Blog articles and social media posts can aid the discovery process by spreading brand awareness and establishing thought leadership. Further along the journey, whitepapers and case studies can help buyers evaluate companies so they can ultimately make an informed decision.
Via HubSpot.
The marketing funnel
A marketing or sales funnel has a construction similar to a tailored buyer journey, but they aren’t the same thing. Buyers will go on journeys whether or not they ever interact with your organisation. A sales funnel leads buyers off the beaten trail and into a more personalised and brand-specific excursion.
Funnels are built around different types of content which are relevant to readers at various stages of the buying cycle. For instance, an email campaign might catch buyer interest and tell them exactly what step they need to take next. In a traditional funnel, that step is usually to consume another piece of content, like a blog post. That post will in turn direct the reader to take another action, such as submitting their email address in exchange for a detailed whitepaper. As you can see, this approach is much more focused on the company’s needs, as it constantly encourages buyers toward the next step that can produce value for the organisation.
The marketing flywheel
In the world of engineering, a flywheel is a revolving device used to increase the momentum of a machine by storing a reserve of power. A flywheel is difficult to start moving, but once it’s in motion, keeping it going becomes easier.
Organic marketing is like a flywheel in that the first engagements with your content are the most difficult to earn – but the more work you put into your campaigns, the easier they will drive engagements in the future. Page authority is an obvious example of this concept. A brand new webpage will take months to gain links and authority until it reaches the top of a search engine results page (SERP). However, adding content to an existing page can make that page shoot to the top of a SERP much more quickly. Here, each piece of content is like an extra shove to the flywheel – each email, article and social post adds momentum and generates lift along the whole strategy.
Via HubSpot.
However your organisation approaches content marketing, the elements will be roughly the same. Before we discuss how each type of content drives sales, let’s take a look at some of the potential goals of a content marketing strategy.
Content is a tool for sales enablement
Sales may be the ultimate goal, but they aren’t the only aim of a content marketing campaign. To build momentum in your flywheel, drive readers down the sales funnel or help buyers reach the end of their journeys, content marketers need to meet certain objectives first.
It can help to think backwards from the point of sale. What needed to happen for your most recent sale to close? What questions did you need to answer? Which pain points was the client most concerned with? How many conversations did it take? What could have sped up the process?
Content marketing drives sales by meeting goals along the sales cycle. Here are some examples:
Spreading brand awareness: Customers discover and learn about your brand through content they encounter organically through search or by clicking on paid advertisements;
Lead generation: The internet is a big place, and not everyone is relevant to your sales goals. Content qualifies leads by providing a way to gauge visitor interest in your company’s solutions;
Establishing authority: In a competitive market, content that demonstrates your brand’s thought leadership helps buyers decide who they want to work with;
Building audience engagement: B2B sales can take months to close, and you don’t want to lose the interest of your leads along the way. Interesting content builds engagement and keeps the conversation moving forward;
Increasing conversion rates: The final sale often requires many smaller conversions along the way. Content can benefit the sales team by bringing in more newsletter subscribers, eBook downloads, inbound sales inquiries and more.
Now let’s examine how different types of content achieve these goals.
Blog articles
Blog articles are the quintessential content marketing asset because they can be one of the most valuable sources of site traffic – if they’re constructed properly. People read them every day, often without realising they’re doing so. People have questions, so they type them into Google and get an answer, which is often found within an article. While they get the answer to their question, they also learn about the brand that supplied the answer. You want to be that brand.
If you believe that the average person doesn’t like reading and won’t read the content on your site, think again. Today’s readers are interested in long-form content that thoroughly answers their questions. In fact, we’ve found readers in the tech and real estate industries prefer blog articles that are up to 2,000 words long. If you want to generate brand awareness and become a known authority in your industry, in-depth content is always better. Consider experimenting with articles of varying lengths and check your Google Analytics dashboard to see which get the most engagement.
eBooks
If you’re using the sales funnel approach, eBooks tend to fall somewhere in the middle. They should contain valuable content that appeals to readers who already have some familiarity with your brand and offerings. An eBook won’t make a great first impression, but it can make your second impression a lot more valuable.
As a piece of gated content – e.g. readers have to input their contact information to download the asset – eBooks tend to perform very well. Compared to emails and blogs, they are much more polished and can provide deep insights into a particular topic.
An eBook is also a great way to repurpose content from your website. For example, if a thought leader at your organisation hosted a webinar, you could condense that information into a short eBook. Or you could compile a blog series into a graphic-rich downloadable.
Case studies
B2B marketers often need to appeal to multiple buyer personas within an organisation to make a sale. For instance, SaaS vendors may need to speak with IT stakeholders and operations managers and gain buy-in from the company’s chief financial officer. Each one of these personas has different concerns and levels of knowledge. If you give them all the same piece of content, it’s likely to only resonate with one or two people.
To effectively appeal to each distinct stakeholder, you need to tailor your content strategy accordingly. Case studies are excellent assets for your sales reps to have on hand as they’re speaking with certain prospects. For instance, if the CFO wants to see proof of how your product or service improves productivity, a case study is the perfect vehicle for demonstrating how your solution performs in the real world.
Here’s an example of a case study that showcases positive, tangible results.
Whitepapers
Like case studies, whitepapers appeal to unique buyer personas at a critical stage of the sales process. This type of valuable content provides hard facts and important details about the solutions your company provides. For example, if SaaS marketers are pitching their product to a company, they might give the CFO a case study and give the IT manager a whitepaper detailing the technical specifications of the product.
During the decision-making process, prospects can turn to whitepapers to get the answers to questions that don’t fit well in a blog article. At the same time, whitepapers can also serve the flywheel model by establishing concrete authority on a given subject.
Likewise, whitepapers can enhance your marketing automation process. You can set up an email drip campaign to trigger when users show interest in your services. For instance, if a user has subscribed to your newsletter and then reads a blog series on your site, your CRM solution could automatically deliver a whitepaper covering a relevant topic.
Infographics
Many of your prospects will be too busy to read long-form content, especially if they don’t yet know your brand well enough. Infographics can capture their attention for a few minutes, deliver insightful data and establish authority quickly.
Aside from being highly shareable assets, infographics are branded content that spread awareness wherever they go. This makes them a valuable tool for inbound marketing – that is, encouraging customers to come to you, rather than reaching out through a cold call. Readers typically click on them to get a piece of data quickly. In the process, they see your company logo, thus making a mental connection between your brand and valuable information. The next time readers need more information on the subject, they’ll think of your organisation.
Social media platforms
Social media is potent because it can be both a platform for your content and it can be content in its own right. For example, if you’ve just published a piece of interactive content on your site and you want readers to engage with it, a social media post can do the trick.
Additionally, social media is a great way to leverage user-generated content. For instance, if your customers are doing cool things with your products, you can encourage them to share photos and videos to your social media pages. This social proof will show prospects that your brand is trusted by the community.
In all its forms, content can drive leads to your sales team. To be effective, your content needs to fit within a consistent strategy. For an in-depth look at how to elevate your brand with content marketing to benefit your bottom line, download our free eBook today.
from http://bit.ly/2NJLVsE
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Remember the MING 19.01 that I reviewed last year? Ming iterated it to the MING 19.02 Worldtimer – the same greatness but more complex. The key elements of the first model are there but some changes were done to accustom the complication. This is my hands-on review of one of the prototypes seen during the Baselworld.
MING 19.02 Worldtimer
MING 19.02 Worldtimer – a simple review
Before running into details and conclusions, I would like to invite you to have a look at the official text of the 19.02 from the MING Website. And this MING Watches Blog post. If you ask yourself why, the reason is simple: the pictures are too beautiful and the text is too well written to risk leaving them to the end of the article and you will not observe them. Plus, the links offer a lot of valuable information.
To have a better understanding of why I enjoy so much this watch, just have a look at the video below:
youtube
Some notes: the featured MING 19.02 Worldtimer is a prototype – the watch has been molested by many hands, including mine and the finishes were not the final ones.
MING 19.02 Worldtimer follows closely the design and the key elements of its predecessor adding volume to accommodate the worldtimer complication.
The same case – still like no other
Looking at the case of the MING 19.02, I have the same impression of the far East heritage. Just like on my first encounter with the MING Watches. Those lugs are simply amazing. The “elegant” and “voluptuous” are words rarely used together. But somehow, the case manages to be dramatically sexy and still have a decency and elegance like no other.
The combination of polished and satin-brushed surfaces emphasise the beauty and the elegance
The case study reveals an attent conceptualisation of natural looking shapes. The curves are carefully calculated to create an eye-pleasing effect. If a classic design will have a bigger base and smaller ending, in the case of the MING lugs, the volume is accentuated to the end of the lug. A daring change but calculated. I bet that mathematics, architecture and biology were in the mind of this case creators.
Another key element of the MING watches is the crown. It reminds me of the sculptures of Constantin Brancusi
The crown simply grows from the case. It ends with a rough, industrial looking embossed logo. Again, words like “organic” and “industrial”, that are not used together, manage to co-exist. Just like a sculpture of Constantin Brancusi, the crown combines the warmth of the organic design with the modern coldness of the metal. The crown is constructed using polished and satin surfaces.
MING 19.02 Worldtimer is well balanced in dimensions. All the watch elements integrate seemly together.
The Worldtimer uses two deep-box sapphire crystal to accommodate the new complication. From the previous 19.01, the titanium case didn’t suffer modifications.
The grade 5 titanium offers lightweight for the case. Troublesome and hard to be processed, titanium offers increased protection against scratches.
The perks of being a wallflower Worldtimer
The MING 19.02 Worldtimer, as its name says, is a Worldtimer complication implemented in the MING style.
First, the case and the crystals must deal with the extra volume needed by the complication. For this, the deepness of the sapphire was increased.
Direct comparison between the MING 19.01, on top, and the MING 19.02, on the bottom. The increased thickness is difficult to be noticed without a direct, physical comparison. Only a trained eye and a connoisseur of the brand might notice directly de difference.
The dial had also suffered to welcome the worldtimer complication. The sapphire was treated, in a unique process, to achieve the deep black in the centre, gradient washed to the edges. The rose gold plated movement can be admired on the outer edges. But this is nothing really new, having the 19.01 in mind.
The fabulous Worldtimer dial of the MING 19.02 brings the same gradient dial of the previous iteration but is enriched with a cool complication.
There are 24 cities mentioned on the dial. Of course, the most important 24 references of globe’s timezones. The 24 hours disc is visible through a nicely realised opening in the black lacquer. The opening’s edge is not abruptly delimited but rather in a Brownian looking finish.
Detail of the Worldtimer implementation
The 24 hours disk is well visible under the dial’s mask. The view is pleasant. Again, “organic” comes into my thoughts.
The sapphire dial edges reveal partially the beauty of the movement’s rose gold finish.
The fabulous good looking SuperLuminova ring from the 19.01 is present on the 19.02 as well. But this time, I just forgot to make a #lumeshot for my #watchesunderthetable set. As accustomed, the hands are skeletonized and filled with Superluminova X1.
Detail of the hands hovering over the sapphire crystal dial. Note the reflections on the dial discs. The cities are printed under the sapphire dial to be closer to the 24 hours disc and minimise the parallax effect.
When the movement moves you
MING 19.02 uses again a fabulous Schwarz-Etienne movement. Calibre ASE220.1 was specially adapted for MING Watches.
Turning the MING 19.02 Worldtimer reveals the beauty of the calibre ASE220.1
I am deeply and irreparable in love with the Schwarz-Etienne movements. The construction, the modularity, the finishes are top, top… I know them for several years and never failed me, in any aspect. So, again for the 19.02, the brand did a marvellous job.
MING 19.02 Worldtimer case back reveals under the sapphire crystal the beauty of the Cal. ASE220.1
Note: in case you observe a slight deviation of gold shades is because the watch is a prototype and the processes are not yet well established.
MING Cal. ASE220.1 is a micro-rotor automatic design with Worldtimer complication designed for MING Watches
The finishes are exceptional. The bridges are partially skeletonised to allow a better view of the movement’s components and depth. The frost finish is realised using bead blasting. The edges’ beveling (anglage) is hand made and hand polished. The movement is enriched and protected by a 5N rose gold plating.
View of the bidirectional automatic winding micro-rotor manufactured in high-mass tungsten.
The Tungsten rotor weight is adorned with geometric shapes and bears the engravings “Schwarz-Etienne for MING 34 Jewels“. A small detail, a nice touch…
The skeletonised winding gear and barrel reveal the mainspring. The spring offers a staggering 70 hours power reserve at full wind.
One of the beauties of the MING Cal. ASE220.1 is the exposure of the constituent components. It denotes the self-trust the brands, MING and Schwarz-Etienne have in their own forces and capabilities.
MING Cal. ASE220.1 is adjusted to five positions and offers a hacking function.
While I am not aware of the exact chronometric capabilities, the Schwarz-Etienne’s experience and the MING’s strictness are for me enough guaranty of the watch’s chronometric quality.
Another view of the Cal. ASE220.1 opening. The movement offers a good and detailed view of almost all elements.
God is in the details
MING 19.02 is a beautiful watch. The delicate look is just an impression at first. The watch is robust and nicely built with an unusual elegance. The finishes are exceptional. Taking into account the extraordinary visibility offered by the sapphire dial on the top and the movement’s openwork style, I can say that MING 19.02 has no secret.
The thickness increase to fit the new complication is unobservable on the wrist. Comfortable and elegant, the watch glued to my heart. It was hard to remove it from my wrist. As the above video showed, setting/winding is facile.
As expected, the MING 19.02 looks rather gorgeous on the wrist.
You got a nice overall package for the price: modern technology, cool ideas and the “independent” badge. Add two straps from Jean Rousseau Paris and all good. Aaah, there are two straps from the prestigious strap maker already in… So, there is absolutely no reason why one should not buy and enjoy this. Other than financially, of course. Still, is one of those pieces that deserve attention.
Forgot to mention how the straps and the signed steel buckle look – great!
MING 19.02 Worltimer specifications and price
The MING 19.02 Worltimer has a price tag of CHF 11,900 and the new orders will ship from the end of Q1-2020. Prices include insured DHL courier worldwide.
Functions: hours and minutes, 24 hour world time, micro-rotor automatic winding
The case, dial & hands:
39mm diameter, 11.2mm thickness, grade 5 titanium
Double box sapphire crystal with double-sided anti-reflective coating
Sapphire dial, radial gradient from opaque black to transparent
Chapter ring, logo and rear markings laser-etched into the sapphire crystals
Polished bezel and lugs; finely brushed caseband
Hands and dial ring with Superluminova X1
Rigid case without spacer rings
50m water resistance
20mm lug width
Movement:
Schwarz-Etienne for MING Cal. ASE220.1
Partial skeletonization with 5N rose gold coating and bead blasted bridges
Hand polished anglage
Hacking function
~70-hours power reserve at full wind
Bidirectional automatic winding with high-mass tungsten microrotor
Movement adjusted to five positions
Straps:
Includes 2x calf leather straps by Jean Rousseau Paris
20mm width, curved bars with quick release
All straps come fitted with signed stainless steel buckles
Will fit 160-210mm wrist circumference
Travel pouch:
Handmade by Koji Sato in Kuala Lumpur from vegetable tanned natural leather
1-year warranty against defects
Made in Switzerland
MING continually aims to improve aesthetics and functionality of products where possible; to this end we reserve the right to make changes prior to final delivery.
Pre-order deposits may be cancelled for a 50% refund at any time up to shipment, except in the unlikely event we are unable to deliver, for which a full refund will be made. Watches will be delivered in the order payments were received.
If you would like to pre-order via bank transfer instead of Paypal, MING Watches offers a CHF 1,000 discount on the price – for more details please email MING Watches at [email protected].
As expected, the MING 19.02 look rather gorgeous on the wrist.
MING 19.02 Worldtimer is well balanced in dimensions. All the watch elements integrate seemly together.
The grade 5 titanium offers a lightweight for the case. Troublesome and hard to be processed, titanium offers an increased protection against scratches.
Another key element of the MING watches is the crown. It reminds me of the sculptures of Constantin Brancusi
The combination of polished and satin brushed surfaces emphasis the beauty and the elegance
MING 19.02 Worldtimer follows closely the design and the elements of its predecessor adding volume to accommodate the worldtimer complication.
MING 19.02 Worldtimer
The sapphire dial edges reveal partially the beauty of the movement’s rose gold finish.
Detail of the Worldtimer implementation
The fabulous Worldtimer dial of the MING 19.02 brings the same gradient dial of the previous iteration but is enriched with a cool complication.
Direct comparison between the MING 19.01, on top, and the MING 19.02, on the bottom. The thickness is difficult to be noticed without a direct, physical comparison. Only a trained eye and a connoisseur of the brand can notice directly de difference.
MING Cal. ASE220.1 is a micro-rotor automatic design with Worldtimer complication designed for MING Watches
MING 19.02 Worldtimer case back reveals under the sapphire crystal the beauty of the Cal. ASE220.1
The skeletonised winding gear and barrel reveals the mainspring.
View of the bidirectional automatic winding micro-rotor manufactured in high-mass tungsten.
MING Cal. ASE220.1 is adjusted to five positions and offers a hacking function.
Another view of the Cal. ASE220.1 opening. The movement offers a good and detailed views of almost all elements.
Forgot to mention how the straps and the signed steel buckle look.
Turning the MING 19.02 Worldtimer reveals the beauty of the calibre ASE220.1
About MING (Official description)
MING is a horological collective formed and funded entirely by a group of six watch enthusiasts from around the world under the leadership of Ming Thein, a photographer, designer, business strategist and above all, a lover of watches. Together, the MING team draws from over 80 years of total experience collecting fine timepieces – ranging from vintage to avant-garde; from quality affordables to six-figure commissioned independent pieces.
When we started collecting, iconic pieces were more accessible and a genuine sense of value and joy accompanied each acquisition. Our goal with MING is to bring back this sense of excitement and discovery through a series of pieces that show considered deliberation and refinement in every detail, but remain accessible to a wider audience. We will be the first to admit that we don’t manufacture in-house, but rather use the most appropriate suppliers for the design intent and price point. The majority of our suppliers also work with major Swiss brands; assembly, regulation and testing is performed in Switzerland, with final quality control done personally in Malaysia.
MING is our way of sharing our experience with enthusiasts who want to discover watchmaking substance beyond brand, for budding aficionados and seasoned collectors alike.
We’re always happy to hear from fellow enthusiasts – please contact us at [email protected], and follow our journey @mingwatches on Instagram and Facebook.
MING is a registered trademark in Switzerland and Malaysia and represented by Horologer MING Sdn Bhd (1255711-P), Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.
Hands-on review of the MING 19.02 Worldtimer – Around the wrist, around the world Remember the MING 19.01 that I reviewed last year? Ming iterated it to the MING 19.02 Worldtimer…
#independent#independent brand#independent watchmaking#Ming#Ming 19.02#Ming 19.02 Worldtimer#Ming Watches#Worldtimer
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Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas She’ll Love
http://fashion-trendin.com/valentines-day-gift-ideas-shell-love/
Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas She’ll Love
So you’re in need of a Valentine’s Day gift, which means at some point you did something right. You followed our style guides, the hair was on point, you didn’t overdo it on the aftershave and you pulled. Huzza! But that doesn’t mean the hard work is over, dear reader.
The relationship assault course is littered with the bodies of men who fell at this crucial hurdle by blindly feeling their way through a department store make-up counter. Fortunately, we’ve got your back with the best Valentine’s Day gifts that aren’t a crappy box of chocolates.
Yves Saint Laurent Black Opium Perfume
Every woman is unique, but fortunately for those who’ll be buying Valentine’s Day gifts, they do share a few common traits. One, unsurprisingly, is that they have noses and as such tend to like things that smell good. So save on the guesswork and snap up a fragrance like Yves Saint Laurent’s best-selling Black Opium perfume. Eau she’ll love it.
Buy Now: £50.00
Ted Baker Salia Tassel Detail Leather Bag
It’s no secret that females can be an enigmatic bunch. But one thing that doesn’t take much decoding is that most of them like handbags. Like, really like handbags. This insatiable lust for light luggage creates the perfect window for you to earn some brownie points with a bag-shaped romantic gesture. This eye-catching orange example is guaranteed to go down a treat.
Buy Now: £109.00
Assouline Chanel Book Set
Chanel No.5 hasn’t been a bad shout for Forced Romanc… sorry, Valentine’s Day, since it hit shelves nearly 100 years ago. But the stuff keeps on trucking, so instead, opt for this set of three hardback books which chart the iconic style of 20th-century designer Gabrielle ‘Coco’ Chanel. Because that new book smell is just as good.
Buy Now: £50.00
Le Specs Tortoiseshell Sunglasses
You don’t need to look outside to know it’s still properly winter in the northern hemisphere. However, as A-Listers and people with hangovers will attest to, sunglasses are so much more than a one-season accessory. Aside from damaging UV rays being year-round, helping your other half get ahead of the game will save you from being dragged shopping in spring. Nice work.
Buy Now: £40.00
Paperchase Floral Phone Case
Given that it’s now completely normal for a mobile phone to set you back several months’ rent, it’s little wonder protecting it becomes priority number one. Help keep her tech tip-top while also giving it a visual upgrade with this flowery option. You’re pretty much guaranteed to come up smelling of roses.
Buy Now: £14.00
OPI Malaga Wine Nail Polish
To us men, nail polish may not seem like the most exciting gift in the world, but ask a woman, and you’ll no doubt hear an altogether different story. This deep, dark shade of red practically has romance and passion written all over it. What could be a more fitting gift for Valentine’s Day?
Buy Now: £10.50
Wahl Iconic Chrome Hair Dryer
With all the ongoing advancements in technology, coupled with the desire of electronics companies to stay one step ahead of the competition, it’s become something of a challenge to find a hair dryer that doesn’t require a PhD in engineering to operate. Save her a fortune in course fees and studying hours by buying her one of the most solid, basic and iconic hair dryers the world has ever known.
Buy Now: £21.99
Topshop Faux Fur Bobble Hat
Few things are as romantic as taking your Valentine’s Day activities outside (easy), but nothing kills the mood quite like frostbite. Plan ahead for a walk in the park by buying her this faux fur bobble hat, which will still be a sound investment the next time winter rolls round
Buy Now: £5.00
MAC All-In-One Brow Kit
While you yourself may not be particularly well-versed in the intricacies of slap, the good people over at MAC certainly are. So long as you steer clear of foundation or anything else that needs to be matched to her skin tone, you really can’t go far wrong here. If you’re still struggling to decide, we’d suggest this all-in-one eyebrow kit. An on-fleek choice, if we do say so.
Buy Now: £22.50
Marc Jacobs Cardholder
Providing she hasn’t spent it all on a lavish gift for you, the lady in your life always needs somewhere to stow her cash. Thanks to plastic, cumbersome purses need no longer apply. So keep things current with a sleek cardholder, like this one from professional smile-raiser Marc Jacobs. A name she’ll definitely recognise and love.
Buy Now: £75.00
Larsson & Jennings Lugano 26mm Rose Gold Watch
There’s no one that doesn’t benefit from an elegant timepiece as a gift on Valentine’s Day. No longer will calls for the shower to be vacated be met with cries of “sorry, I’ll be another 15 minutes yet, I didn’t realise the time”, and she’ll get a shiny new watch. Everyone’s a winner.
Buy Now: £195.00
Framed Breakfast At Tiffany’s Poster
If you’ve heard the word “Tiffany’s” being muttered by your partner in recent weeks, there are some big expectations this Valentine’s Day. To swerve any sizeable bank dents, act the fool and buy this framed poster of one of the most stylish films of all time: Breakfast At Tiffany’s. Phew.
Buy Now: £37.19
Moleskine Notepad
A diary, shopping lists, writing love letters, drafting divorce terms. The sheer number of things a notepad can be used for is enormous, and it’s something that no man or woman should be without. All jokes aside, this versatile tool makes the perfect Valentine’s gift for the wordsmith in your life. Whatever she uses it for, this isn’t the sort of gift that will get thrown in a drawer and forgotten about.
Buy Now: £9.50
Hand-Tied Roses
Roses on Valentine’s Day may be a bit of a cliché – okay, a lot of a cliche – but that doesn’t mean women don’t still want to receive them. A carefully selected bunch is a classic romantic gesture, and the good folk at Interflora will arrange them way better than you ever could using flowers from the garden that you hacked up with the kitchen scissors. Trust us, we know.
Buy Now: £38.00
Chan Luu Tasselled Gold Earrings
Even the most hairy-arsed, beer-swilling, football-loving, wood-working man’s man should be able to recognise that this is one seriously nice set of earrings. And if you’re sold on them, imagine what your significant other will think. Just make sure she actually has her ears pierced before you go splashing your cash. Otherwise, you could be out of pocket and in for a rather awkward Valentine’s Day.
Buy Now: £60.00
Victoria’s Secret Mesh-Detail Slip
Make this the year you swallow your fear and brave the lingerie section alone. Just remember to give the customary nod and grimace of acknowledgement to any other lost souls you happen to make eye contact with (we’re all in the same boat, after all). Alternatively, you could save yourself the trauma and buy your (and by ‘your’ we mean ‘her’) lingerie online. Not quite as courageous though, is it?
Buy Now: £41.85
Kurt Geiger Mid-Heel Peep-Toe Ankle Boots
Unless you’re utterly hopeless, you’ve probably picked up on the fact that many women have a certain fondness for footwear. If you’re not utterly hopeless, then you’ve probably already figured out that this fondness makes a pair of shoes an excellent option when it comes to buying presents. Opt for a pair from Kurt Geiger and you’ve bought yourself a one-way ticket to gratitude city, population: you.
Buy Now: £89.00
Neom Organics Tranquillity Scented Candle
Can’t afford a romantic spa break? Fear not. Recreate the relaxation of a luxurious and calming pampering session at home by firing up this specially formulated de-stressing candle from Neom Organics. It might not be quite as lavish, but it’s the best you’re going to do for £16. Besides, who doesn’t like posh candles?
Buy Now: £16.00
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Things to See, Eat, and Do in Krakow!
Krakow was the first stop of our month-long trip through Poland and what a great city to kick things off! Our visit to Krakow was filled with delicious platefuls of pierogi, trendy neighbourhoods covered in street art, relaxed afternoons on the banks of the Vistula River, stunning architecture around every corner, and lots and lots of ice cream. For years friends and fellow travellers had been urging us to visit Krakow, and now we understand why; the city is pretty magical but it also has a cool edge. In this post I’m going to share my mini-guide to what I think are some of the best things to do in Krakow:
THINGS TO DO IN KRAKOW
Spend a few hours wandering around Kazimierz
Kazimierz is Krakow’s Old Jewish Quarter and it lies directly south of the Old Town. The neighbourhood was mostly destroyed during the Second World War and then fell into further disrepair during the Communist period, but today it’s one of the city’s hotspots.
Kazimierz’s streets are covered in art, its sidewalks are dotted with bars and restaurants, and you can find art galleries, boutique shops, and vintage stores all in the same block. It draws a youthful crowd – both young by years and young at heart.
But if you really want to see Kazimierz come to life, you have to wait till evening. This neighbourhood is renowned for its nightlife, and you don’t realise how many watering holes there truly are until the sun goes down and revellers emerge en masse.
Some of the most popular bars in the area include:
Singer – Instead of tables, you sit around old Singer sewing machines.
Alchemia – Set in an old tenement building, with interiors that will make you think you’ve travelled back in time.
Propaganda – Covered in old posters and knick-knacks from the Soviet era.
You can find a bigger selection of trendy bars in Kazimierz here.
Taste the best ice cream of your life
Oh, my goodness Polish ice cream is good!
After a few days in Krakow, I had only managed to learn one Polish word: lody. This may sound like a bit of a faux pas – surely, please and thank you should have come first – but when those four letters spell out ice cream, you can understand why.
There’s one place you need to try and that’s Emil Kręci Lody. I visited that ice cream shop more times than I care to admit and it was pure magic every time. The flavours were natural, slightly understated at first bite, but you could taste each and every ingredient. It was better than any other ice cream I’ve ever had.
My favourite combination was the waffle cone with three scoops of mango, coconut and strawberry sorbet.
Trust me, the ice cream is worth the trek across the bridge.
Sample pierogies with different fillings
Speaking of food in Krakow(surely, ice cream qualifies as some form of food!), I also had some of the best pierogi of my life in this city.
It all went down at Pierogarnia Słowiańska Uczta (Krakowska 44) where I had lunch on my first day thinking I would just have a plate of pretty average pierogi. My interest was piqued when I saw they had a pretty interesting menu with experimental fillings. I went with one order of the classic pierogi ruskie, which is stuffed with potato and cottage cheese, but feeling adventurous then I also ordered pierogi pieczarkami, serem i orzechami, which turned out to be mushrooms, cheese and walnuts.
Oh, boy! Of course, this turned out to be my best meal in the city!
The mushrooms were the perfect filling I never knew existed. They were rich and earthy, and the chopped walnuts added the perfect texture. A plate of 10 was beyond filling, but if you had put a second plate in front of me, I would have gone at it, because a meal like that is just irresistible. Needless to say, I went back to this place again and ordered the same thing. As you do!
It’s a small place and they only have about 6 tables in there, so if you can swing by outside of lunch hours, you’re more likely to get a table, but check the hours because they don’t stay open late.
Feel like a queen (or king!) at Wawel Castle
Krakow’s crowning jewel is Wawel Castle, which for centuries, was the residence of the kings of Poland. This is one of the largest castles in Poland (though not quite as large as Malbork Castle, which takes the title of largest castle in the world by land area!), and it’s hard to miss given its size.
We unknowingly happened to visit on a day when there was a special function taking place, so many of the areas were off limits, but even standing in the courtyard and seeing the mix of Medieval, Renaissance and Baroque architecture was pretty cool.
You can get information on admission and hours here. For conservation reasons, there are daily limits on the number of visitors who can enter Wawel Castle, so you’ll want to plan ahead.
For some stellar views of Wawel Castle, I would recommend going for a walk along the Vistula River at sunset. There’s a nice path that comes to life with bikers, rollerbladers, dog walkers, and sunset lovers, plus you also have a big stretch of grass directly underneath the castle, where you can sit down, relax, and enjoy the last bits of sun.
Enjoy the summer vibes along the Vistula
And speaking of the Vistula River, if you’re visiting during the summer months, one of the most popular things to do in Krakow is to go on a sunset river cruise. We opted for a small sightseeing cruise, but there were larger and livelier boats blasting tunes and keeping the booze flowing – these seemed especially popular with bachelorette parties.
Aside from cruises, you can rent kayaks, or if you’re not really in the mood for exercise, you can hop aboard one of the many boat restaurants where you can have a drink or dinner.
Tour Schindler’s Factory
Oskar Schindler is responsible for saving the lives of over 1,200 Polish Jews during the Holocaust by employing them at his factory, and this same factory now hosts a museum, so we went to visit.
I thought the museum would be a bit more about Schindler, his workers, and their combined story, but the museum takes on a different shape. The former factory now hosts two museums: the Museum of Contemporary Art in Kraków, which is located in the former workshops, and a branch of the Historical Museum of the City of Kraków, which is located in what would have been the administrative building of the factory.
We visited the latter, which is home to a permanent exhibition titled Kraków under Nazi Occupation 1939–1945. This is honestly one of the best museums I have been to in a long time, and it really pulls you in with its narrative, telling you the history of Krakow’s inhabitants – both Jews and non-Jews – and the events that unfolded once the Nazis occupied the city. If you only have time for one museum in the city, I’d pick this one. You can check the opening hours and ticket prices here.
Take the Royal Route through the Old Town
I can’t believe I’ve made it this far without mentioning Krakow’s Old Town, but this city just has so much good stuff on offer.
So another thing you can’t miss in Krakow is going to the Old Town and walking the Royal Route, which was the historic coronation path of Polish kings. The route starts in the north end of the Old Town at St. Florian’s Church, goes past the Barbican and through St. Florian’s Gate, straight down Florianska, past the Main Square and St. Mary’s Basilica, down Grodzka, and up Wawel Castle.
Another reason to visit Krakow’s Old Town is that it has the largest medieval town square in Europe. We were there on a weekend so it was very lively; there were lots of street performers, the cafes were packed with people enjoying sunset drinks, kids were chasing giant bubbles floating across the square, and there also happened to be a jazz festival featuring some overseas talent.
Look up inside St. Mary’s Basilica in Krakow
Travelling in Europe means you set foot inside a lot of cathedrals, and if there’s one I think you shouldn’t miss, it’s St. Mary’s Basilica in Krakow’s Old Town.
You do have to pay an admission fee to enter, but I think it’s worth it. St. Mary’s Basilica is home to the Altar of Veit Stoss, which is the largest Gothic altarpiece in the world and also one of Poland’s national treasures. The piece was carved by Veit Stoss, a German sculptor, between 1477 and 1484, and it’s a massive triptych carved out of different types of food. The amount of detail that went into this piece is amazing.
Another reason to visit St. Mary’s is the ceiling, which is painted to resemble the midnight sky. It’s hard to pull your eyes away.
They have a really up-to-date website that lists different events like choirs, organ concerts, and mass.
Where to stay in Krakow
We found one of my favourite AirBnBs to date here in Krakow! This two-story attic apartment was located in Podgorze, which is a funky district with a local vibe just south of the Old Town on the shores of Wisla River. The apartment had arched windows to boot and it was so nice waking up in the morning with natural light streaming in. I especially enjoyed lounging in the living area and observing people come and go. If you’ve never tried AirBnB before, you can use my discount code on your first trip.
There are also lots of hotels, B&Bs and hostels to fit every budget. You can get a better idea of rates and availability here.
Have you visited the city? What are some of your favourite things to do in Krakow?
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Text
three - not an act of an enemy
book: the devil is my saviour
word count: 3.1k
song: say anymore by kiiara
masterlist
"The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because generally they are the same people."
- G.K. Chesterton
• • •
C H A P T E R T H R E E
Waking up and having no clue where you where was not a good feeling. It's not. It's like being drunk. You have no correlation of why, when or how you got there. You just know somehow you had managed to haul yourself from destination to destination. Sometimes it's for the better you might have been in a bad situation but sometimes it's the opposite. You can never tell until you know your surroundings.
The copious weight in my head is what I feel first, before I've gained full consciousness, before I've opened my eyes, before I've even had the chance to blink; its the heaviness I feel. I groan and sit up slowly from the bed I happened to be lying on - feeling as if I had the biggest hangover.
I blink repeatedly trying to refocus my eyes from their blurry state. The walls of the room I was in were sooty black and I frown on instinct.
No room in my apartment was a dark colour like that. I flick my eyes around the room in search of anything that would explain where I was. But there was nothing. Except a black wooden table that stood at the end of the room opposite the door and a painting that hung above it. It was of a women of great beauty, coffee coloured skin - the type you would get by adding just a tiny bit of milk, dark hair and bright hazel eyes but it wasn't the women that stood out it was what she was wearing, a dress with a kaleidoscope of colours - tattered with various rips and holes. Behind her was an array of midnight black and white wolves all bowing their heads as she held what looked like the moon. The words, 'change shall occur from the hands of a broken soul' is written in calligraphy under it and I stand up from the bed to walk closer to it.
My eyes are fixated by the beauty of it - the colour, the words and I don't know how long I stay standing there until a voice breaks me out of my gaze.
"So you are alive then."
I stiffen, I knew that voice. It was such a distinctive voice, hoarse but at the same time alluring and sneaky. I turn and widen my eyes at the sight of Greyson leaning on the doorframe. Why was he here? With me? How had I not heard when he came in? Nothing good ever came out of both of us together.
"Where am I?" I ask. He looks around with that oh so irritating smirk of his.
"In my room it would seem." He shrugs nonchalantly as if it didn't mean anything. Maybe to him but to me it did. Not only was he the devil but he is Reya's boyfriend and I'm pretty sure she wouldn't appreciate the fact that I was here. Not in the slightest.
"Why?"
He smirks, "As much as I don't like you, Lux and I saw you sprawled out on the floor and decided to help you. Well Lux decided to help you. I didn't really care. Your pretty lucky Lux was there if not you would wake up still on the floor. Plus I didn't take you as a screamer."
He winks and I glare.
I shift on my feet, balancing my weight on each foot one by one. I bite my lip and glance his way before looking away. I could feel his gaze on me and it made me a little more than uncomfortable.
"Well - thanks anyway." I mutter.
"What did you say?" He asks and I look up sharply narrowing my eyes, of course he would milk this for all it was worth. I clench my jaw.
"I said thank you." I say a bit clearer than the last and he leans in slightly from his spot feigning that he didn't hear what I said, "Sorry what?"
I huff and cross my arms. I looked like a child. I was certainly acting like one. But I didn't care this boy knew how to get on my last nerve. I stomp out of the room, stopping to barge his shoulder on the way. Funny thing about acting like a child in a place that is unknown to you. Is that you realise you have no idea how to get out and need to grow up and ask.
Leaving the room, I am met with a hallway; the colours the same as the previous room. I frown why was his place so dark looking. The hallway wouldn't have been confusing if there had been one distinct door to show the exit but there wasn't. Instead there were different open places that had the shape of the door, leading to a different direction. I don't have the first clue on how to get out. I need to ask him. I glance at him quickly to see him already smirking, well that's encouraging. I just stood there looking helpless as I contemplated asking his smirking ass.
"You know many girls would be honoured to be in my room let alone my presence - and here you are running away." He states cockily and I smile, my lips tugging sardonically.
I do a little curtsey in front of him, my feet crossed, my left arm spiralling outwards while the other was tucked into my body and my head bowed, "Honoured."
He chuckles and I sigh returning to my standing position. I need to go, this conversation was starting to feel somewhat normal. My eyes flick through the empty door ways. Decisions. Decisions. Decisions.
"Looking for the door?" He asks. Shit. He knows. He's realised I have no idea where to go. I should just ask him. I want to desperately say yes. But my pride has other ideas.
"No."
"- oh really."
Now's the time Aria. Just admit it - there's no shame in it. Just do it for the sake of getting out. But none of my mental pep talks work and I find myself nodding.
He hums, "Well Lux needs to speak to you, so unfortunately I have to keep you here anyway."
I widen my eyes suddenly feel very dizzy and my mouth feels dry. I gulp painfully.
"Can I have water please?", his eyebrows raise up, "No fight?"
I just blink at him, "Alright." He says.
He starts walking down the hall to the second last entrance, me trailing behind. He walks to the mahogany door the end of the corridor. I frown as he opens it. The kitchen was stunning, everything nicely organized and polished as if it were not touched and everything black. This apartment was nice, way too nice and way too big. This was prejudice. How could he get the nice luxurious apartment when I have a small basic one.
"What did you say you wanted again?" He asks and points his hand towards the stools.
"Water."
I look at the stools almost too scared to sit on it as if somehow my bum would do anything to it.
"You can sit - you know, the chairs aren't going to bite." He says through laughter. I bite my cheek, my feet were beginning to hurt. I sit down, running my hands on the table.
"How come your apartment is so grand looking? My apartment doesn't look near as good." I ask and he turns placing a tall glass of water in front of me.
"- because its not a campus apartment; its mine."
I frown, "How far is it from campus?"
"A good 15 minutes." He shrugs and my frown deepens.
"But you said you heard me screaming." I mutter. I was sure my screams weren't that loud and even if they were he would have never been able to pinpoint it to me.
"I did. I also have a campus apartment. Which happens to be opposite yours." He states, answering my subliminal question. I raise my eyebrows - I had never seen him nor noticed. Now I think about it, that was probably why Reya always looked so dishevelled when she came to mine in the evenings. She had probably previously been at his doing god knows what.
"I never noticed."
"I'm not there often."
But all of this didn't answer the question that was now tugging on my mind.
"But why did you bring me here instead of your campus or better yet leave me where I was?"
He groans, "Enough with the fucking questions just drink your water."
I eye the water cautiously.
"If you did anything to this water. I swear to God I will haunt you." I warn and he smirks.
"Good I decided not to want to fucking kill you today. Plus you asked for it."
I nod. True.
"Need anything else?"
I sip the water as he watches, "You know if I didn't know better I would think you cared Slade." I say and he chuckles.
"Well its good you know better Angel."
I nod. "Yeah and I hate you because of that."
He shrugs leaning back on the counter, "Ditto."
I look down staring at the marble counter, I knew why I was really still here. I didn't have to wait for Lux - in fact I didn't want to. But I also didn't want to be left by myself and my thoughts.
"Water for your thoughts." He asks and I scoff.
"It's penny for your thoughts."
He nods, "I know. But by giving you water I've already done my good deed of the day."
I roll my eyes, " Always so insensitive."
He shrugs, "Well me and my insensitive self do not find your company pleasurable. So I'm going to do myself a favour and leave. You can wait here for Lux."
I widen my eyes at his statement. Not because it surprised me at all. No. It was because of the realisation that if he left I would be myself. Just me and my thoughts and I didn't want that. So I act upon it. Instead of just watching him leave I get up and grab hold of his arm stilling his movements. He turns and glares at my hand in disgust and I recoil my hand back.
I gulp and cast my eyes to the sleek marble counter, "Need to pee." I mutter and he narrows his eyes slightly, "What?"
I clear my throat quietly. "I need to pee."
He looks at me with a raised eyebrow and suddenly I feel a wave of nervousness infiltrate my system. I bite my lip which subsequently causes his eyes to focus on them. He takes a step forward and I take a step back biting my lip harder. Before I know it his face is inching closer to mine as I realise the dilemma I had put myself in. I want to move so badly. I want to take another step back. But I can't. I'm stuck - frozen in my position. His head moves impossibly closer and soon enough his face is all but a mere millimeter from mine and my eyelids are fluttering. His eyes flick across my face. His head tilts slightly to the left and his minty fresh breath fans across my face as he speaks, "Toilets that way."
I frown and step back quickly from him as if he had burned me. I watch as his lips turn to a smirk and I turn to see a grey door that would in fact lead to a toilet. I scramble away quickly locking the door behind me and breathing for what it felt like the first time since 5 minutes ago.
I didn't need to go to the toilet. I just didn't want to be by myself but here I am by myself because being in Greyson's company was dangerous and I'm sure something terrible would happen. I look around and sit down on the toilet seat. This room was a contrast to possibly all the other rooms, it was a shell white colour instead of the black and grey.
I sigh holding my head in my hands.
What was I doing?
Why didn't I move?
God Aria you can't do this again - you promised.
I did. I promised myself this couldn't happen again. Your reading this wrong Aria. Maybe I am. Maybe he just wanted to tell me where the toilet. It wasn't as if he was going to kiss me. So why did I want him too. No you don't Aria. Your not in the right mindset. No I'm not in the right mindset. Too much has happened. It's because she's back. Everything's coming back.
"Silly silly girl." I mutter to myself.
These things can't come back again it would push me off the edge - for sure this time. Come on Aria. Your better than this. Your strong. You did it once before. You can do it again. I breathe out. I should go.
I shakily bring myself to my feet. I put my ear to the door to see if I could hear anything on the other side. But - nothing, it was silent. I slowly push the handle door being careful not to make too much noise. Just a small click and the doors open. I step out and scan the room. No one. Now I need to find my way out. I tiptoe stealthily the way I came in to be met with the hallway of doors leading to different entrances.
Eenie.
Meenie.
Minie.
Mo.
My eyes land on a dark blue door I hadn't noticed before. It must be the way out. What's the harm in trying? Right. I'm about to take a step but hands that wrap around my waist and close my mouth; stop me. I didn't need to scream. It was a waste of energy. I knew his touch. It was familiar and it always made me feel funny. He drags me into the room I had awoken in as I watch my freedom get further and further away.
Greyson's in front of me and I'm in front of him. He's breathing hard, looking at the closed bedroom door behind me with a faraway look and I feel awkward. I bite my lip and his eyes snap to mine.
"Stop that."
I stop. He takes a step forward and I try to take a step back but unsuccessfully so as the door blocks my movement. Greyson still had that faraway look but this time his eyes are glued to mine. He keeps stepping closer and closer to me until our toes are touching. I cast my eyes away from him.
"Look at me."
He orders and I know I have to listen. I already learnt to listen to him. I knew what would happen if I didn't. I look up to his eyes and I see the argument he was having with himself.
"Want to-"
He stops and I swallow. I pick at the bracelet on my left arm, pulling and tugging at it. His eyes avert to it and he nods slowly in recognition.
"What?" I whisper.
"Want to kiss you."
My lips felt dry and I run my tongue over them.
"-So bad." He mutters and I hum. I couldn't speak. I didn't trust myself to say the right things.
"But I can't."
I hum.
"But m' going to anyway."
I hum.
He holds my jaw in place and makes me meet his eyes. Before I know it his lips are on mine and he's kissing me with force. I stand there for a bit in shock. I didn't expect him to actually kiss me but here I am kissing back. He nips at my bottom lip and I moan lowly at the feeling.
"Fuck." He murmurs on my lips and I hum. Fuck indeed. He doesn't stop though. Instead his lips travel down my face, leaving lingering kisses in his trail. On my jaw, behind my ear, all over my neck before he stops - right at the spot on my neck that always sent my head into a frenzy. He knew it. He knew it all to well and he starts sucking and nipping at it. I could feel the blood rushing to the surface but it didn't seem to phase me that he was marking me because my thoughts were all jumbled. I couldn't think straight and I was whimpering at the feeling of his lips. He tugs me impossibly closer to him as if we weren't close enough. His hands are gripping my waist tightly and my fingers are coiled up in his hair. He pulls back and looks at the fresh mark prominent on my neck with an intensity I couldn't ignore. I can't breathe properly, still trying to recover from our heated kiss.
"Fuck." He repeats and rests his forehead on mine. The room held tension so strong and we both noticed it. I didn't know what to say. I wasn't sure if I should say something, knowing I would probably spoil this 'moment'.
He opens his mouth but closes it again.
I open my mouth but close it again, repeating his actions.
He shakes his head slightly; my head moving with his.
"I m-"
"Grey." A voice calls out, stopping his sentence and causing us to both to jump away from each other.
"Grey." The voice calls out again. Greyson turns around with a breath and runs his fingers through his now messy hair. I freeze and watch his movements.
"Greyson." I whisper and he whips around as if realising I was still here.
"You need to fucking go."
"Gr-"
He clenches his jaw, "M' not gonna tell you again."
I nod quickly and turn to walk out the room. I slam the door and lean on it my head tilted backwards. I run my hands down my face. "Fuck." I mutter.
I heard a loud bang and the sound of something breaking and I wince.
"Aria?" The voice that interrupted us called and I tilt my my head down.
"Lux."
"Aria-" He steps closer to me and I rub my neck in an attempt to cover Greyson's mark. He looks at my hand briefly and I'm scared he noticed but he doesn't show any signs that he did as he looks me back in the eye. "We need to talk."
And all I can do is nod.
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