#also i put everything into not giving him what the reference pic make it seem a bowl cut XD

[hotfuss]

frank iero and the future violents

[ham1lton]

i’m with the band.

pairing(s): lando norris x singer!reader

warnings: v slightly angsty? but happy ending.

summary: pop band CHANGE! has just released their anticipated third album; however, fans notice that the songs seem to tell an unsavoury story….

author's note: i didn’t know whether u wanted me to do a happy song or sad but i like drama. i refer to y/n’s bandmates by their roles. so guitarist, bassist and drummer so you can add their names in! also this album is loosely based on SAWAYAMA and 5sos’s album youngblood. listen to them both if u haven’t!! incredible albums. if you can name all these songs that have been mentioned then MWAH!!! 😍

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liked by harrystyles, landonorris and 3,388,728 others.

changeband: thank you so much to the best, coolest and awesomest fans in the fucking planet. shoutout to everyone who showed up to our listening party in philly last week! you were metal as hell and we loved meeting everyone of you. no more fomo for the rest of you all now that our newest album is now out! please stream and buy and recommend to your friends and family and colleagues and even that annoying neighbour that everyone hates. we love you and we love this album!! here are some behind the scenes pics of us making and brainstorming this baby!

view all 288,938 comments

user1: this album is sooo good!

user2: ooh y/n got her masters in cuntology with a concentration in motherlogical studies from the university of servington… that NOTE in dynasty??? oh goddddd.

-> user4: DYNAAAASSSSTTTTYYYY 🗣️🔊

user3: the casual photo dump like they haven’t released the album of the CENTURY?

user8: you guys have come such a far way from working minimum wage and having to pool money for a recording booth omg. i’m so proud of you guys 🥺

*liked by changeband.*

user5: the way guitarist is eating this album. whoever greenlit her guitar solos i want to kiss them on the mouth.

user28: bad friend is my fav! both the acoustic vers and the normal vers!! PUT UR HANDS UP IF UR NOT GOOD AT THIS STUFF!!!! 😍😍

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liked by messyass1, messyass2 and 278,727 others.

ham1ltonshaderoom: girl band CHANGE! have released their new album ‘babylon’ and it has sent twitter in flames after the first tweet (pictured above) went viral. especially after the songs ‘lie to me’ and ‘want u back’ both contain lyrics that have sent fans of the power couple lando norris and y/n l/n spiralling. what do you all think of the drama ham1ltons?

view all 20,783 comments

user1: i do think it’s slightly suspicious… not necessarily a break up confirmation but it’s interesting. especially as she didn’t even bother to confirm or deny whether or not they’re still together on jimmy fallon….

user2: why do we speculate into these celebs lives? if they broke up, who cares and if they’re together… who cares?

hater1: who gives a fuck. she can’t even sing.

-> user3: you clearly gaf if you’re commenting under y/n related posts???

loveislanduk: don’t worry y/n! if need be, you can always find a new man on the island!

-> user98: messy asf 😭

user6: is tkl supposed to be y/n talking about how lando was super adored and that although he could have any girl, she’d be the only one who really loved him?

-> user4: tokyo love hotel is a homage to drummer’s japanese heritage not a lando worship song?? also it’s a metaphor for their heritages as three of them are women of colour who grew up in the west and saw their cultures exoticised.

-> user6: ‘yeah your fascination is my world’. that could be interpreted as her saying ‘your obsession is my boyfriend’.

-> user4: girl yeah but that’d be a lazy one would it not? lando ain’t that special 😭 i think that it’s reductionist to make everything she writes about a man and not her.

user44: calling the album babylon after the bible story? maybe they started with the idea of creating this amazing relationship and then grew apart? they stopped speaking each other’s language?

-> user56: maybe you need to put this energy into analysing your resume and figuring out why you’re still unemployed….

user65: idc if she broke up with that troll because that’d mean drummery/n will thrive!!

-> user9: um… u mean guitaristy/n??

-> user34: both wrong. bassisty/n is the best version!!!

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CHANGE’S INTERVIEW W/ JIMMY FALLON (transcript)

JIMMY FALLON: welcome, everyone! we have a special treat for you tonight. please give it up for the current leaders of the world charts, the incredible band CHANGE!"

(audience applause as the girls take their seats)

FALLON: alright, alright! now, there have been some rumours swirling around about your latest album and its connection to some personal matters. especially in regards to y/n. care to shed some light on that?

Y/N: well, jimmy, first of all, thank you for having us. i’m aware that there have been some rumours, but you know how it is. people love to speculate. our music is definitely personal, and yeah, it does reflect some of what's been going on in my life but i want to set the record straight. the songs on our album are inspired by a variety of our experiences, including relationships, but they're not always directly about any specific individuals. sometimes i’m inspired by other forms of media or my loved ones’ experiences. that’s the joy of making art, it can be whatever you want it to be.

DRUMMER: yeah, and y/n is such a talented songwriter. she has this incredible ability to channel her emotions into our music and make you feel whatever she wants.

BASSIST: exactly. we're just here to make music that connects with people, and if our songs happen to resonate with someone going through a breakup? then we've done our job. that doesn’t mean we’ve necessarily gone through that.

FALLON: is it true that you’re performing two songs for us tonight? can you confirm which ones?

GUITARIST: yes! we’re performing ‘want u back’ and ‘frankenstein’. both of our newest singles from babylon.

FALLON: well, you heard them, folks! get ready for an amazing performance from CHANGE!

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liked by bassist, guitarist and 1,272,973 others.

yourusername: we’re fine y’all perfectly fine please don’t call paw patrol.

view all 68,928 comments

user1: OH THANK GOD.

landonorris: she’s lying. i’m in my lemonade era…🍋

-> user23: you wish you could be that iconic. you’re in your dogwater era.

-> landonorris: UNPROVOKED???

user3: we needed this confirmation.

user8: PARENTS AREN’T DIVORCED WE WON 🙌

landonorris: now can you release the bonus tracks please please please 🙏🏼 ‼️😩

-> bassist: no :)

-> guitarist: yes :)

-> drummer: one of them is lying… guess who and i’ll send the whole album plus excluded tracks.

-> landonorris: … um 😅 guitarist?

-> drummer: WRONG ‼️ but i’m scared you’re gonna complain to y/n so i’ll send them over to you 🙄

user27: at least we’re back to having lando being CHANGE!’s biggest fans. what did he think of ‘exile’?

-> yourusername: he cried so hard he threw up.

-> user27: real shit.

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taglist: @cuteskz @molten-m122 @dangeroustacoalienbiscuit @booksandflowrs @mxdi0 @k1arsworld @alexmarie29 @luckyladycreator2 @23victoria (let me know via ask if you’d like to be removed).

wanna get tagged in any future works? sign up for my taglist!

[rattyshipss]

Presidential level jealousy (Chapter 4) "Dressed to kill"

Stanley Forbes x reader (Me✌️💖) (Romantic) Pip, Ravi, Cara, Jake, and Devon x reader (Platonic)

Below is a reference to what mine and Stanley's costumes look like, minus my Chucky one (Thank you Matthew for this pic😌💖)

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

"There's a killer stalking the white house and you're throwing a party!"

Said party the group was currently getting ready for, Pip and Ravi in their Bonnie and Clyde couples costume, Pip's hands still partially stained from helping Josh with his Batman costume before they left. Connor and Jamie both dressed up as characters from their favorite childhood show, Zack and Lauren in a disgustingly lovey dovey couples costume, they couldn't decide between an angel and devil or Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, settling on a mix between the two. And finally Cara, in her incredibly detailed Robin Buckley costume from her and Pip's Stranger things watch nights.

All getting ready to meet the others at the white house, of all places, Pip still wondered how they'd even managed to get in but thankful that they did, they needed to, to find Chucky and Grant.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Stanley and (Y/n) were at their shared home also getting ready. Stanley normally wouldn't give Halloween too much attention, except it was (Y/n)'s favorite holiday. They both decided to at least dress up, both head to toe in black outfits with matching black eye makeup, nothing specific, just... spooky. The pair not wanting to go all out after the year they'd had, nothing too big, but still dressed up.

(Y/n) was sitting on Stanley's lap, facing him and helping him with his eye makeup, intermittently having to touch up certain spots from the smudges caused by your periodic make out sessions, unfortunately because of the situation you guys were dealing with you didn't have time for anything more. You couldn't help yourselves though, seeing eachother all dressed up. "What time does this thing start?" Stanley said, not even knowing himself if he meant the party or the plan.

"8:45" she smiled, causing Stanley to throw his head back, partially in annoyance at their time constraints and partially in adoration of her smile. "Hey I need to finish." She said, tilting his head back up, rolling her eyes. "But we have all night when we get back... if we don't die." And Stanley nearly choked on nothing. "Except for the trick or treaters." He countered, even though he was more than ready to see her being so sweet with all the children. No matter how fucked his past was she always found a way to make any part of it seem beautiful.

(Y/n) finished up Stanley's makeup, stepping away from him to put everything away as Stanley watched her closely from his seat, her other costume packed and ready.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

8:35 pm, the group arrives at the white house, Halloween costumes and all, as if this year wasn't already scary enough. As they stepped out of the car it was like the coffee shop on steroids, security guards practically every few feet, large groups of people in costumes just, enjoying the holiday. They stood at the bottom of the grand steps staring up at the building. Jake in a cowboy Chucky costume, Devon in a construction Chucky costume, and finally (Y/n) in a girl Chucky costume, each fit with their own "accessories" in preparation for entering.

"Thoughts and prayers?" (Y/n) said looking toward Connor nervously who laughed uncomfortably in reply. Devon spoke next as they made their way up the steps. "I don't believe in prayer, not anymore, but I do believe in us." Jake nodding between the two. "Me too." Devon stopped as they were about to reach the entrance. "Let's do this for them." He said, referencing all the people Chucky had taken from them, aswell as the victim in Pip's case.

"And they'd want us to go fuck that fucker up."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As they entered they were met with more security, slapping bracelets on their wrists to mark their entry. "Next." (Y/n) walked through the the scanner first, immediately setting it off as she looked back towards the others nervously. The security guard waved the metal detecter wand over her partially exposed body, stopping at her head, the man mumbling under his breath and ripping the hair clip from her head causing her long red hair to fall down her shoulders. "What? Hey!"

"Next."

Jake walked through next, also setting off the alarm. "Whoa, easy cowboy. I'm gonna have to take that." The man said gesturing to Jake's lasso. "Seriously?" The man scoffed in clear annoyance, giving a sarcastic smile before replying coldly "Yeah."

"Next."

Devon walked through after, setting off the alarm, again. The man waved the metal detecter over Devon before patting him on the back, smiling.

"Have fun."

The rest of the group quickly following through, one by one, as (Y/n) and Jake rolled their eyes. "Fuck, there goes that. And my costumes ruined." (Y/n) said as Stanley jogged up to catch up to her. "You always look hot." Cara laughed, causing (Y/n) to shrug in agreement. "I still have my phone, so as long as we get Chucky on camera doing his thing, we can get it out there. We can tell Grant and the president, and Pip will have time to talk to Grant. We got this"

"Do we?!" (Y/n) asked, turning around to face the others. "Are people even gonna believe us? It's called a deep fake they'll just think it's special effects." Jake sighed in reply.

"Do you have a better idea?"

"No."

(Y/n) shook her head while the rest of the group listened. "We still have to subdue him somehow, he's won't talk just cause we say please, that might work on Grant, not Chucky." Pip crossed her frustrated with the holes in their plan. "We just have to work with whatever we find in here." Jake looked between the two girls before stepping past them. "We sure as hell aren't gonna find anything we can use on Chucky here." The group walking synchronized again. "We need to get upstairs to the residence." Devon said causing the others to look towards (Y/n), especially Stanley.

"Leave that to me."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They walked through another very tall, very wide entrance into another room, this room even more packed with people dressed in costumes. Before they could take three steps into the room someone dressed as a clown jumped infront of the group, yelling inches from their face. "I hate Halloween."

Stanley knew that was a lie, probably the biggest lie she's ever told, and she's had to lie to him about Chucky. Halloween was always her favorite holiday, even after everything that happened on both sides for them. After what happened to Stanley she had even asked him if he'd be more comfortable if they didn't celebrate it anymore, he of course denied her offer, but thought she was the sweetest for even asking.

Past the decently sized fake cemetery archway was where most of the people were, dancing, drinking, laughing. The group walked past a mime doing a high kick, Frankenstein's monster, and about a dozen witches, all the masks around making Ravi feel uneasy. They stared at their surroundings in awe, looking at all the lights, the people, and the giant swirling hypnosis type screen behind the dj, before the group heard (Y/n) let out a shriek. "Boo!" "Oh, shit!" They turned to see Grant with his arms wrapped around her from behind, Stanley having to resist the urge to rip him off of her.

"Hey, (Y/n). It's so good to see you." Grant said pulling her into a hug. "Happy Halloween!" She smiled at him, nervously looking towards Stanley. "Oh, you look amazing." Shit. Now she was even more anxious about Stanley. "T-thanks. You too." Grant looked nervous too, about half as nervous as she was, but still nervous. "Oh, um, I want you to meet my parents. They're over here." "Oh, cool. yeah." Grant lead her towards them, the rest of the group following closely behind.

"Mom, dad. Hey, excuse me, sorry." Grant said nudging some important looking people away from his parents. "This is (Y/n), um, and Jake and Devon, and... everybody else." He laughed awkwardly. "Hello. James Collins." Grant's dad shoot (Y/n)'s hand. "Hi. Nice to meet you." The rest of their introductions following.

Stanley knew it was stupid, knew it wasn't that big of a deal but he couldn't help it, couldn't help feeling that deep pit in his stomach, a mix of sadness and embarrassment at the fact that he couldn't bring (Y/n) to meet his parents. That was what normal couples did, he'd met hers, but she could never meet his.

"I just love your outfits." Grant's mother smiled at them. "Our son Henry loves Good Guys too. And Stranger Things." She said gesturing towards Cara who did a little bow. The Chucky look alikes thanking her. "Mine's the best though, right?" Devon said, doing a little twirl, Grant's mother laughing. "It's very impressive." "I know a guy." Devon said, leaning closer to Jake who tilted his head with a smile. "I take it you're the guy?" "Yeah. Jake" Jake replied with a smile, everyone smiling with what seemed to be genuin smiles for once, letting their guards down for a second and just enjoying themselves, even if the topic still revolved around Chucky.

"(Y/n), I admit I haven't heard much because our son is pretty tight-lipped, at least with his family." His mother said looking over (Y/n)'s features as Grant rolled his eyes embarrassed. "But what I have heard is great." The conversation faded away as Grant's father seemed to be distracted by something, or someone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey, Grant, where is your brother?" (Y/n) said as the group followed Grant. "Henry? Uh, he's upstairs. He's having some kind of, like, mental breakdown or something." Grant said shaking his head and shrugging. "Oh, is there any way that we could see the residence?" She asked, immediately seeing Grant tense up. "Oh, um, that's kind of, like, a whole other thing. I mean, you thought the invite protocol was hard."

"I mean," (Y/n) stepped closer towards him. "I'd love to see your room." Grant, aswell as the rest of the group froze, Stanley gritting his teeth. "Yeah, for sure, follow me."

This was gonna be a long night.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Happy Halloween!🎃🔪❤️

[fourseasonsfigs]

New Year Joint Special Project - Orange Soda

You can read about the other sets in this 6-set series here, here, and here, but just to recap, this is one in a collaborative series of six designed among five fig makers for the Lunar New Year 2022.

This fig collaboration launched on February 22, 2022, which seems like a lifetime ago! Along with the figs, the makers collaborated to give early bird buyers a piece of a magnet which formed part of a larger piece of art. If you got all 6 magnets, you could complete the whole art piece.

The collaboration was 4 Wenzhou sets and 2 Junzhe. This is the second of the Junzhe fig sets (the previous one was from the Bazaar interview, linked above but also here).

The inspiration for these look of this set of figs are based on this Weibo pic from Zhehan:

...and this set of Weibo photos by Gong Jun:

The reference to orange soda comes from both Zhehan and Gong Jun:

MTL translates this as, the first glass of orange soda in autumn

Gong Jun made a post (with an unrelated song attached) quoting the first line from his song Sweet, Tonight's scenery is so beautiful, let's have a glass of orange soda

These figs arrived with the table unfortunately broken into two separate pieces. Zhehan's chair and Junjun's glass came through the trip unscathed.

This was where the good times began. Because the table leg was broken off, it just rested gently against the base and couldn't snap in or screw in. I tried a number of solutions - a piece of a fig sticker, a little bit of crystalline wax, arcane magic spells - no luck.

The other issue was that the wineglass did not simply snap into or tuck into Junjun's hand - the shape of his hand curving around the glass was too large for it, so the glass just fell out. I tried putting a bit of wax into his hand to hold it, but no luck.

I already had my resin glue out for another fig I had received that I had to mend, so I decided to use a tiny bit of it for these (even though these are PVC). Yeah, writing it out like that is making me wonder what I was thinking. In retrospect, this was a bad idea, if only because one of the problems with the resin glue is it's insanely slow dry time. So sitting there holding the glass to Junjun's hand, and then also sitting there holding the two pieces of the table together was not my smartest move. Anyway, it worked great for the glass. The table - not so much. I'm not sure it's actually ever dried, because it's wobbly and the table top tips in one direction or the other fairly easily. When it finally comes apart, I'm going to clean it off and just use superglue.

You'll notice I have Junjun here on a pretty big chunk of Museum Putty. This little man was designed to stand very casually and elegantly, balancing on one foot. The problem here is that it's a very small fig foot, and a pretty large and heavy fig head. This gentleman won't stand up on his own for anything. The little tiny foot of his is also extremely smooth and polished on the bottom, so putty and wax and fig stickers don't stick very well. He'll stand for a few seconds, or even up to a minute, and then fall right over.

I don't like to do anything permanent to my figs if I don't absolutely have to, so I don't want to, say, use sandpaper to sand his foot to make it a little bit grippy, or use permanent glue on his foot. I mean, I would sand his foot a little bit if I thought it would help, but I don't think it will. Maybe the one I got is just a bit unbalanced, or the head is extra heavy, but I don't think it will be strong enough.

I still don't have a solution for him - I've tried adhering him to a fig base with everything I've got (and in combinations, even!), and he still just topples over. I wanted to avoid it, but I'm probably going to have to superglue him down to a base.

There's a little bit of overspray by Zhehan's hairline, but it's not really noticeable in real life. I believe the sunglasses are removable, but they arrived with them firmly wedged in there, and I'm terrified to remove them! Plus, the photo has him with them, so I like them on him.

You'll notice that Zhehan is also puttied down. The chair that came with the figs suffers from the same problem with most figs with chairs - the chair is very light and the fig head is heavy. Zhehan just topples right off this chair without some sticky support. Luckily, the Museum Putty works well to keep him in place. I can see now looking at this picture that I used a bit too much - I'll go ahead and take some off so it can't be seen from the side like this.

Oh this set. It's so cute and clever! I love it so much and it's such an enormous pain.

Just adorable. I love Zhehan's sunglasses here!

Speaking of his sunglasses, here's an extreme closeup so you can see the detail on him. He's just so cute! They did a great job on his hair, and I love his rosy knees.

Look at the great detail on Junjun's shirt. They did a beautiful job on this - so crisp and clean.

What a cute box card! Here's the other side of it:

MTL translates this as, "Have a drink of orange soda."

The box extends the artwork - I love it! Really cute.

There was an optional purchase of a frame for this set. I did buy it, since I always buy the extra options, but now that I think about it, I didn't get it. I'll have to check with the warehouse.

Here's the magnet that comes with this set. This whole chibi art piece is just so cute, and this little slice of it does not disappoint. We have Zhehan being big-eyed and adorable with his can of orange soda, and Gong Jun bringing him some watermelon slices to enjoy. The digital readout on the fridge in the kitchen has their birthdays, along with some cute magnets with some themes we can't help but recognize!

There's plenty of delicious snacks on the shelves, Zhehan has an apple on the table if he wants it, a bunch of hydrangeas making the place cheery, and lots of juzipi friends hanging out watching the fun.

Alright! We're in the portion of the segment where I'm going to let anyone that isn't in a position to see mildly spicy (PG-13, it's high on the adorableness scale and low on the sauciness scale) artwork go. We'll do the fig count so I can continue to keep track, and then you can close out. Anyone else, feel free to venture forth!

Material: PVC (despite resin glue shenanigans)

Fig Count: 147

Diorama Count: 9

Snowglobe Count: 1

Rating: Cool and refreshing

[link back to Master Fig Index for more posts]

****************************************************

I'll ramble on a bit so I push the pic down on people's phones or computers - just being respectful here!

This is set 4 of 6... one of the last two ones is on it's way to me even now, and hopefully my EMS package doesn't get bogged down in the holiday rush here in the US. That one is the Longyuan canyon leap - ah, it's so good, I can't wait!

The very last one is the Bedema lake fight, and it's the one I've been most excited about from the beginning. It looks incredible, I can't wait.

Alright! That's enough rambling, without further ado:

Looking good! The last two magnets flank these on either side - and then we'll be complete!

[agentnico]

Fool’s Paradise (2023) Review

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia: Mac and Charlie Write a Movie. *Cue music*

Plot: A down-on-his-luck publicist discovers a former mental health patient who looks just like a misbehaving movie star. He soon becomes an unlikely celebrity when he gets thrown into the bright lights and behind-the-scenes bustle of Hollywood.

Charlie Day is a funny chap. He’s proven this on the long running FX comedy series It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia and also in his various film appearances, including the amusing Fist Fight which literally is about two teachers played by Day and Ice Cube getting into a fist fight. I mean, whoever came up with the idea of putting these two together in a movie to have a fist fight at school deserves some type of medal. Heck, give the guy a Noble Prize for outstanding achievement in pairing fun opponents for a fight! Anyway, now Charlie Day is giving us his directorial film debut with Fool’s Paradise where he directed, written, produced and starred in. It’s evidently a passion project of his that he’s been working on since 2018 and took his time to make the movie that he wanted by undergoing several reshoots, taking script advise from the one and only Guillermo del Toro himself, and overall put his heart into. 

So it is to much shame that I am here to report that Fool’s Paradise is not a good film. What’s worse is that its a movie that has so much potential, and Day’s ambitions come from a very good place, but the result is a movie that is kind of a waste of time. Inspired by silent films of the bygone era of the likes of Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton, Charlie Day seemingly is trying to bring back the good natured simple comedies that relied sorely on slapstick physical comedy and situational humour. Nowadays we primarily get raunchy American comedies or farcical entertainment reliant on pop culture references. Not dissing any of those, but I can see how Day is trying to bring back that old-school satire to modern screens. So from the get-go this movie wasn’t going to be a box office hit, as it is made for a very niche market. However for all its good motivations, Fool’s Paradise results in a bland satire with very unfunny jokes, a lazy confused plot and a stacked waste of a talented cast.

Fool’s Paradise strives to poke fun at the industry quirks of Hollywood, the mercurial nature of star power and the strange characters one can meet along the way. A fine premise that worked well for multiple seasons of Netflix’s BoJack Horseman, and even the recent Chazelle pic Babylon had something to say on the matter, however here Day seems to not have anything new or insightfully ambitious to add to the subject, beyond pointing out the obvious caricatures that are involved in the movie industry business. And on this journey it seems Day has forgotten to add the actual jokes, and if there is a bigger sin for a comedy to have is to not have funny jokes.

Casting wise Fool’s Paradise is a cameo cavalcade of stars. Obviously Charlie Day himself stars as the main mute, and though he did alright, I feel like for a character that is definitely inspired by Chaplin, Day misses the essence of what made Chaplin’s character so amusing. That being a character that physically reacts in funny ways to the world around them, and sometimes not in the most natural ways. However Charlie Day’s one and constant reaction to everything in this movie is puzzled looks and arched eyebrows. That may make for a somewhat adorable persona, but overall there’s not much else to him. Ken Jeong is miscast as the down-on-his-luck publicist, as even though Jeong is perfect for underlining the over-the-top annoying nature of this character, when it comes to the more dramatic elements and developing his central-to-the-plot friendship with Day’s Latte, Jeong simply doesn’t have that emotional depth to portray those elements. As for the rest of the ensemble, as I aforementioned it is very much see-if-you-recognise-them cameo stroll, and even though it is amusing to see some recognisable faces, a lot of them feel very forced and thrown it just for the sake of it. Common and John Malkovich especially suffer from popping in in their respective singular scenes to give some random monologues that feel as if they are attempting to make some needless political statement, and then folks like Jason Bateman and Jillian Bell are given even less to do. I’d say stand outs include Jason Sudeikis and Adrien Brody, both of whom are talented actors and as such know how to deliver even the worst of lines in a somewhat funny delivery, and to be fair when either of them were on screen I was at least mildly entertained. Also Ray Liotta in one of his final roles, again, brings his natural gravitas and umph-factor as a Hollywood producer, and I must say Hollywood really has lost one heck of an acting legend. 

Fool’s Paradise is very much a meandering journey through a set of unfunny sketches, and an unfortunate result for Charlie Day, as this very much feels like a movie he’s put a lot of efforts into and it simply hasn’t worked out. As Will Ferrell once put it - “you start on these endeavours and you never try to make them bad but some just miss the mark beyond your control”. So here’s to hoping Charlie Day’s next endeavour does hit the mark.

Overall score: 3/10

[dorimena]

𝕷𝖆𝖈𝖊 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝕮𝖆𝖐𝖊

𝔠𝔥𝔞𝔯𝔞𝔠𝔱𝔢𝔯; bakugou katsuki

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱; 1.4k

𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰; fem!reader, lingerie, sex toy (vibrating butt plug), implied edging, implied overstimulation, pegging, mommy kink, dacryphilia, dom!reader, sub!reader

𝔬𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯 𝔱𝔞𝔤𝔰; garterbelt, dry orgasms, didn’t know lima bean respect day existed, if you haven't realized i refer to reader's dick as cock whether flesh or silicone, implied aftercare, aged up character, Bakugou is in his 20s

𝔰𝔦𝔡𝔢𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢; late gift for the birthday boy who i haven’t written anything about until now. It was supposed to come out as a small fic, but University kept getting in the way and I’ve fallen behind with some pendant writings. Guess this is my first headcanon thing. Not proofread!

April 20th could mean anything for a lot of people:

In the US, it’s National Pineapple Upside Down Cake Day.

Also in the US, it’s National Lima Bean Respect Day.

Internationally, for the weed lovers, it’s 420 Day.

But April 20th simply means it’s your boyfriend’s birthday.

Bakugou had been hinting about wanting a small surprise for a while, whether big or small

And by hinting, I mean downright telling you every breakfast, lunch and dinner spent possible throughout March that he wants something from you, but doesn’t want to know what

If you were Mina, you would’ve thrown a party at some lowkey club and hired one of the best DJs in the city, if not the country

If you were Kirishima, you would’ve taken him hiking to a new mountain someplace else in Japan + a weekend glamping getaway

If you were Sero, you would’ve gone to do something relaxing, maybe a spa? Aerial yoga? Definitely not to just see his ass in some yoga pants

If you were Kaminari-

Well, that’s actually an interesting thought… What would you have done if you were Kaminari?

Bakugou wearing a black, see-through thong, the most sensual looking lace garterbelt you could find in his size and a pretty black bow sitting on his ass is what you managed to come up with

Sure. At first he was ready to fight, but then he remembered who you were so obedient baby boy mode was activated without any more fuss. That, and his fucking fantasies.

He’s also been fantasizing for the past few weeks leading up to his birthday about how you’d probably ride him. Maybe fuck him? He doesn’t care, just wants to be babied and loved and fucked good until he passes out to wake up a week later.

Maybe not, he still has work to do

Another reason he put up with this is because, y’know, you tend to be nicer on special days so-

Bakugou wearing a garterbelt makes you feel so many levels of horny in a span of 30 seconds once you see it on him. It accentuates his already envious waist line even more. God, you can’t wait to see him bent over and ass up.

So you tell him gently to do so from where you’re sitting, and he does it so prettily.

Reminds you of a graceful cat, the way he turns around on the bed, chest already down onto the bed sheets as he pulls his torso as close to his knees as possible. Juicy ass is as high as it could be and wow, the thong doesn’t do a good work at hiding the glimmer of the diamond butt plug.

Pity it didn’t come in any other color than white, but it came with the lingerie.

You didn’t even warn him when you turn the butt plug on.

The promised low setting already sounding pretty loud, his small huffs indicating it’s not as overwhelming yet.

Good.

But by now, you’ve left it on for a good while, watching as he tries not to lose his balance or shuffle too much to ‘lose the appeal’.

He’s cursing at you in airy moans, vermillion eyes glaring at you. Why are you teasing him? You’re meant to be nice.

It’s his fucking birthday

You’d punish him for his impatience, but you already punished him the day before.

You don’t want him not being fucked in the ass so you turn the vibrator up to the last setting, smiling sweetly as he curses even louder

This is still punishing but nice, right?

He seems to agree

His arms are restless, moving from staying beside him to moving above his head to grip at the sheets.

His hands also go to grab his ass and pull the cheeks apart to show you how he’s clenching desperately around the toy, whining about how he needs you right now, to stop fucking around and get your big ass cock in him or else-

But that “or else” doesn’t really get finished, not with you startling him with your speed and sight of the ribbons.

His arms are tied now, forcing him to keep spreading his ass, to keep showing himself off.

This has him burying his face into the bed, hiding how red he’s gotten from embarrassment.

You don’t allow that, so you press your hand onto the plug to push it in deeper.

He yells out your name, body jolting as the toy relentlessly messes with his prostate while your other hand curiously goes to touch the front.

The thong is absolutely soaked and sticky, and when you move your fingers against the fabric to feel just how sticky it is, Bakugou tries humping them, well, really just trying to rub his dick against your fingers because wow the stimulation of the fabric is n i c e.

But you’re not having it just yet, you wanna appreciate his perfect posture a bit more.

Reminder: the butt plug is already at its highest setting.

So the next best thing you can do is smack his ass because your baby loves that, loves how you leave compliments and praise for how it jiggles and gets a pretty red. He does it for you, after all, makes sure it’s always at its best presentation.

But he’ll never tell you shit because then you’ll tease him and embarrass him in front of his friends.

So a few slaps in, being careful with his hands, all followed by cooing at how it moves, how it blushes, how it’s now matching his face and probably dick too, has him trying to fuck back into the vibrator, but he’s humping absolutely nothing and growing more and more desperate and horny.

You back away from the bed, going for your camera to take another pic for your growing collection.

On the bed lies Bakugou Katsuki, all tied up, lingerie getting sticky with precum, the laciest garterbelt you’ve ever seen decorating his waist while he’s panting heavily, ass in the air, face completely red and wet, whether it be his sweat or tears.

He’s holding his ass apart to show you the vibrating diamond butt plug that’s been stuck in the highest setting, buzzing away as he’s whimpering your name, hiccuping “mommy, mommy, mommy” as he pleads for mercy, wiggling his ass as he tries luring you back to his body.

“M-mommy! Hnnnm tuh-touch me! Plea-ease? Please~”

Hey, aren’t you supposed to be nice? Eh...

He can’t come alone from the vibrating butt plug, never has been able to before, and if his rocking hips don’t indicate how much he wants to either fuck the bed or have your hand on it, you just ignore it.

Let’s see if tonight he’ll be able to cum hands-free for once. And make sure he cries more and more everytime he gets to cum from your cock and only because of your cock.

Basically that’s your birthday gift. Fuck him good until he either forgets his name, he's a babbling, crying mess, he's completely milked, or all of the above.

After hours of being edged by the toy he finally came, but in thin, small amounts, so you had to fuck out a few more rounds and cum out of him before he passed out.

In all honesty, he begged you to fuck him until he passed out. He had been fantasizing about it, after all.

After you both had your final orgasm of the night, rather early morning, he’s in tears, body trembling through the last tremors of his 2nd dry orgasm out of what? 7 orgasms? The copious amount of cum he’s managed to get milked out of him drying everywhere on his body, drool wetting the bed sheets even more than they were, room smelling like caramel, asshole fluttering around nothing and dick twitching as if wanting more.

Bakugou’s speaking gibberish at this point, the only coherent words leaving his dumb mouth being “mommy”, “more” or your name as he slowly succumbs to his exhaustion.

You give him your premium grade A aftercare during the little time he remained conscious and took care of everything else as he slept.

Next day, you cook breakfast, even if he grumbled about the taste or appearance.

He’s a good boy, he’s not gonna yell at you or be ungrateful with anything and everything you do, considering you put up with his anger. I mean, he gives his opinions, insights, inquiries through loving shouts of disapproval and approval.

All in all, he liked his birthday, but told you he kind of expected you to throw a party and had mentally prepared himself

Goddamn it. Guess next year you’ll call Mina for some help

[lovelylollymc]

i’m back || wilbur soot / alivebur

(I couldn’t find a good gif/pic for this fic so it won’t have one lol!)

Summary : Wilbur hadn’t seen you in 13 and a half years and when he sees you one his enemy’s side, he’s very upset.

Warnings : mentions of toxic/abusive past relationship and death, let me know if I missed anything :)

Notes : There are some references to ‘Revived’ by Derivakat in here because that song is amazing. Comments, reblogs and likes are appreciated and feel free to request something!

You had loved Wilbur. Keyword : had. At first, you two were lovesick fools for each other whilst fighting for L’Manburg’s independence. It was a risky time to start a relationship but somehow, you and Wilbur made it work. It was so great, you were as happy as ever. Until the election.

The election caused the downfall of your relationship with Wilbur, along side the fall of Wilbur himself. Schlatt decided to allow you to keep your citizenship but revoked both Wilbur and Tommy’s. It broke your heart to see the two chased out of the country that they built and fought for.

You tried your best to visit Wilbur anytime you could. Tubbo helped you sneak out to Pogtopia a few times before you started to go by yourself. The first few times you went to visit Wilbur, he was the same from when he left. Sure he was angry and upset, but he still treated you with love and kindness. He treated you like royalty.

Around this time, you also started to become good friends with Quackity. He had started to dislike Schlatt but was still loyal, so you had to be careful with what you shared with him. Little did you know, Wilbur was spying on you. He was not happy to see you becoming friends with the enemies.

He confronted you one time when you visited Pogtopia. That’s when you knew the honeymoon phase was over, and your relationship might not reach the end of this war. He insulted you, pushed you around, no longer treating you like royalty. But, you were blinded by hope that you could still fix the stupid relationship. So, you continued to visit and he continued to hurt you and you continued to stay quiet.

It wasn’t until the night before the final fight that you spoke up. At first, you seemed quiet. Then, Wilbur crossed the line. That’s when you started to yell and push back. You didn’t deserve this abuse! You didn’t deserve to be treated like nothing! After your outburst, Wilbur brushed it off. Brushed you off, like you were nothing once again. He continued with his plan, not regretting the way he had treated you the past few weeks. The only time he would was when his father pushed a sword through him, but that was for a mere moment before death took him away.

---

You had known Ghostbur, but he always reminded you of Wilbur. They didn’t act the same at all, but you decided to distance yourself from the ghost. New L’Manburg wasn’t your cup of tea either. You were proud of Tubbo for becoming president but once he exiled Tommy, you decided to leave. After a while of living away from the wars and politics, Quackity tracked you down and told you L’Manburg was destroyed. For good. 

Then, he presented an idea to you. A new nation, not like any other one in the past. So, you decided to help Quackity build up a new nation. Las Nevadas. It was a tough job at first, but you had built a nation before. You and Quackity both agreed that Las Nevadas would not be like L’Manburg. You were both hurt by that nation’s stupid politics and wars, especially you. After Wilbur passed away, you told Quackity about your relationship with the now dead ex-president. Quackity, being the good friend he was, promised Wilbur would never hurt you again.

That’s why he didn’t tell you Wilbur had gotten revived.

---

Las Nevadas was always warm but Quackity made everyone wear a uniform with long sleeves and pants. You didn’t mind, you thought you looked great in the uniform. 

The sun had just started to set when you decided to take a walk around the town. You always liked to walk around and see if any of the other residents had built something new or put up a new poster. 

You were walking by the restaurant when you heard something coming from the side of the building. Guessing it was just one of your friends, you decided to check it out but when you turned the corner, you saw the tail end of a jacket dart behind the building.

You followed but before you could turn the corner, someone grabbed you and held you back with a hand around your waist and a hand over your mouth. You struggled against the person’s grip and tried to break free but they were too strong. “Stop fighting darling, it’s just me,” a voice with a british accent said into your ear.

You gasped. Wilbur was alive? How? Wilbur slowly let you go and turned you around. He seemed way older. His hair was longer and he had a white streak in it, his clothes were tattered and you could see a clear mark where he was impaled. “Wilbur...how are you-”

“Dream revived me! Isn’t that great?” Wilbur cut you off. He was about to pull you into a hug but you stepped back. “What’s wrong darling?”

“You need to leave, now,” you stated before turning to leave. Wilbur grabbed your hand to turn you back around.

“Why should I? We need to get caught up, love,” he replied. You pulled your hand away and started to speed walk away. You mentally decided that you couldn’t go back to your home, then he’d know where you lived exactly. So you led him to the sign of Las Nevadas.

The two of you stood at the top of the hill next to the large sign as the sun began to set.

“I see you decided to join Quackity’s nation, is he your new boy toy?” Wilbur said, breaking the silence.

“What?” 

“Don’t ‘what’ me, love. I know how you and him were friendly whilst I suffered in Pogtopia. I can read you like a book.”

“Clearly you can’t because if you could, you would see that Quackity is simply my best friend. I joined Las Nevadas because he’s my friend and he promised to protect me,” you said as you felt your anger bubbling up.

“Protect you? From what?”

“From you!”

Wilbur went silent after you yelled at him. It took him a few moments to process what you said. Then, he placed his hands on your shoulders, grabbing your attention again. “Oh darling, you don’t need to be protected from me,” Wilbur cooed as his hands trailed down your arms.

“You’re right,” you said, pausing to give Wilbur a false sense of hope that he had beaten you again. “I don’t need to be protected, I can protect myself.”

Wilbur’s hand found your shoulders again and began to squeeze harshly. “That’s the thing, you can’t protect yourself, or else you would’ve left me well before Manburg’s end. But you already know that, don’t you? That you’re too weak to save yourself and that’s why you stayed with me, because I kept you safe,” he said, squeezing tighter with each word.

You knew there would be bruises forming soon but you stood there, straight face. You weren’t going to give him the victory. “What was hell like, Wilbur?” You asked calmly.

Wilbur laughed but his hands didn’t let up. “I was stuck in a train station and I couldn’t leave. No matter what I did. I screamed, I tried to break out, but nothing worked. I was...trapped,” he answered, his tone softening at the end. His hands let up as his own personal feelings caught up to him.

You thought you finally won but Wilbur inhaled sharply and grabbed you by your upper arm, squeezing there instead of your shoulders. “It was thirteen and a half years that I spent on that train station in hell and I’ve come back hell bent,” he said.

Your eyes widened as he let you go. Wilbur turned to face to face the sunset then pulled you closer to him. You didn’t fight back, you were too shocked at his previous words to do anything. Wilbur held you against his chest and the two of you watched the sunset. 

“A decade of time to make everything mine.”

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Social Media Tidbits, September 2022

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Hey Gals! Just a couple of small things I forgot to post yesterday. First off, AMC is comparing Heath to Davon and pointing out the PPP card. So, nothing we didn't know, but it's nice to have official confirmation.

I also took these from the La Dona episode. Eric finds this photo album and looks through it. It's hard to say who these pictures are of. The top left one looks like Alma with the little girl. So, it seems she might have had a daughter. Which just makes her all the more like Leah, since the daughter isn't there anymore. But with others, it's hard to tell.

In the second pic, there's an older girl, approaching teenage-hood. I don't know if that's supposed to be the same little girl, a few years older, or not. Or maybe they're all of Alma. Although, you would think pictures from her childhood would have been in black and white. I was also thinking that maybe--just maybe?--the girl could be Dalia. They really don't give us much to go on either way. Thoughts?

I have a few others I’ve taken screenshots of in pst weeks but just haven’t had the time to look into. Did I ever post this?

Just kind of interesting that they seem to be trying to establish a timeline.

Below are some random ones from Emily and Norman. They may be nothing at all, but they caught my attention. If anyone else wants to look into them, feel free. I’ll try for later today, but no promises.

@wdway:

The comparison of Heath and Davon makes me think that they can't rely on the general audience to connect the two, they're having to spell it out and point out the PPP card. Unfortunately I think it's more about the general audience doesn't care that much about Heath and have not given much thought to the ppp card or what it could mean.

The photo albums really does leave a question of who is that little girl to Alma? A daughter, a niece or even a grandchild. If Dalia was Alma's grandchild that would explain how she knew about her grandmother and if it had been years, decades even that they had not seen each other that would explain some. But no way of really knowing.

I think that the clarification of the timeline and tying Fear in is a not so very subtle hint that everything is leading to the CRM. Why even mention that particular storyline if not to point the seeds that there is a connection.

The tweets (I'm assuming that's what they are) from Emily and Norman are interesting. My mouth dropped with the dark and white horse. 

I mean seriously, it just screams the opening credits with what I believe is Rick on the dark horse and Beth in silhouette on the white one. 

Love that Emily included the return star and now there is a okay symbol, I wonder what's okay? I'll be honest I had to go Google what the Red Hands Files were. 

@wdway:

Lard Forkboy, I'm assuming you're questioning what appears to be child endangered type of art.

@twdmusicboxmystery​:

Yes. The red and pink caught my attention. This is actually a song. I’ll put the lyrics below. There are several possible TWD references in it, such as eating oneself alive, guts, a black pied piper. Even a part that talks about “we peed,” lol. Made me think of Daryl taking a piss in Still.

But it also may not mean anything at all. I often wonder if sometimes the actors come across music with some vague images in them that reminds them of TWD, and so they post them, but they really don’t mean anything beyond that.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Forkboy by Lard:

A fork is a cold shiny tool To pierce, tear and ingest Whoever has the fork in hand Controls the meal of its choice We're told the first few punctures They're for our own good Better chewed up in pieces Than blown up in the ovenAgh, Agh, AghForkboy Flies by night on stolen fuel To Santa Rosa, CA Opens a fake employment office Want a job, go get me drugs People desperate for work Return to quite a surprise Busted for intent to sell Cops pay him a bounty Forkboy skips townAgh, Agh, AghWe came We peed We conquered You bleedThe choice Forkboy Or finger foodUgly joy What does it replace Why wait When you can eat yourself alive todayJunk bondage takeover glutton Ready to bore in Unfold his rotary blades inside Pull the guts out and resell them Buys out his next target With the last one's pension funds Thousands more thrown out of work So Leona won't have to settle for a mintForkboy Picked by the FBI To be the black pied piper After Dr. King died Watches soap operas on TV While 6 billion disappears from HUD Who are you working for What did you hope to gain Why do you hate your past So much you destroy the ones you love

Forkboy

@wdway:

Isn't that a young Queen Elizabeth on a motorcycle? Thought that was kind of fitting right now with what's going on. 

@twdmusicboxmystery​:

Ah. You’re probably right. I was thinking it looked very WWII, and might be a reference to the War/Revolution theme. But I’m probably over-thinking it. I do that sometimes. ;D

@wdway​:

Emily wants to be a bird. Maybe a green parrot? Or a blue Heron . I saw somewhere that she's in Nashville and will be performing locally here, I think this weekend. So this could be about breaking chords from her past because this is where her ex (as far as I know) still lives.

 @twdmusicboxmystery​:

Great thoughts! Love them! 

[hatchetation]

NCIS Hawai’i: What’s in a Name?

Happy Monday! I decided to make a long post about character names and meanings in NCIS Hawai’i. I included what I already said about Lucy and Kate in this post (with a couple of additions), and added the rest of the NCIS Hawai’i team. It’s a bit long but I think a decent amount thought was put into their names so that’s cool!

Lucy Tara: Lucy (coming from Latin) means “light;” Tara (coming from Sanskrit + some other related languages) means “star.” To me, these names together show that Lucy is the type of person who lights up a room, someone whose compassion and determination, like a star, shine through and are a beacon for others. Also, Lucy is an overachiever and is clearly already a fan favorite--total star in her field 🌟! Her last name being Tara also gives some info about her ethnicity (i.e. possibly Arab).

(gif from @gaytvthings​ )

Kate Whistler: Kate (nickname for Katherine, coming from English) means “pure;” Whistler (also coming from English) means “one who whistles.”

Well, first off, Kate is a pretty commonplace name but Whistler is a little more unusual. Second, if this most recent sneak peek shows us anything, it’s that Kate’s reasons for being a DIA officer are pure–she’s there because of her beliefs about how to best serve her country. But, most people call her Whistler, not Kate, and seem to find her to be more of a nuisance than anything (like, say, someone who whistles all the time lol). Also, she’s kind of like the referee blowing a whistle and putting a stop to the NCIS agents’ missions (Ernie literally referred to her as an alarm in 1x06 🚨). Last thing, the writers probably knew that a lot of characters would call her Whistler rather than Kate so maybe wanted something distinctive for that.

(gif from @fuckinprototype​ )

Jane Tennant: Jane (coming from English) means “God is gracious;” Tennant (coming from Scottish and English) means “tenant.”

So for Jane’s name, I think the historical and etymological name meanings are less important than what her name /sounds/ like. First, Jane is kind of an everywoman (think “Jane Doe”) and I think her character is meant to be an everywoman--a mom and careerwoman in whom many women could see themselves if they lived in an alternate universe where they had been in the CIA 🕵. Second, Tennant is a humble name in that a tenant is not an owner or landlord but someone trying to live on the land. Tennant is in a position of power, but as a woman that position isn’t typical or guaranteed. Also, to me, Tennant sounds like tenet (and a quick google search shows that tenet is often confused with the word tenant)--a principle or belief. Jane is a principled woman and her principles guide her decision making.

(pic from tvline.com)

Jesse Boone: Jesse (coming from Hebrew) means “king” or “God’s gift;” Boone (coming from French) means “good.” For Jesse’s name, I also relied less on the name meanings (although if I were straight I might say Jesse is God’s gift...to women 🤪). The name Jesse brings to mind Jesse James, the infamous American outlaw. The name Boone brings to mind Daniel Boone, a famous American pioneer and folk hero. So Jesse Boone is strongly rooted in American ideals and principles like rugged individualism. Basically, Jesse is an all-American guy, married, Christian, etc.

Kai Holman: Kai (coming from Hawai’ian) means “sea;” Holman (coming from English) means “dweller on an island.”

I think Kai’s name pretty much says it all 🌊 and also makes me rethink his catchphrase from the pilot episode--never turn your back on the ocean. Kai is a native Hawai’ian and his roots are important to him and inform everything that he does. (Also just fyi, Holman has a few name meanings, but I thought island dweller was the most relevant).

(pic from tvinsider.com)

Ernie Malik: Ernie (short for Ernest, coming from German) means “serious” or “battle to the death;” Malik (coming from Arabic) means “king.” I found Ernie’s name really interesting! I don’t actually know if Ernie is short for Ernest, but it’s a common nickname for Ernest so... Ernest means serious and the word earnest means “showing sincere or intense conviction.” Ernie is an earnest person--his work his highly credible, he’s passionate about it, and without him the team wouldn’t get far. That said, he’s a fun loving guy with a good sense of humor which explains to me why he goes by a nickname. And then Malik--I think this is mostly to indicate Ernie’s ethnicity but also, Ernie is a king among men 👑.

(pic from tvinsider.com)

[p-redux]

Gloating about being an insider during a time of sadness is DISGUSTING

I'm not gloating, I'm posting INFO and FACTS like I always do...and showing restraint and discretion in not posting it sooner, and not posting the details, which I haven’t and won’t.

But you know what IS disgusting? Here’s a LONG list, and by no means, a comprehensive one, of what Extreme Shippers, Former Extreme Shippers, and Assorted Haters have done that is VERY DISGUSTING. I’ll write it stream of consciousness-like and not in order. Put your feet up and grab a tall drink. Here we go...

Click on Keep Reading

Extreme Shippers found Cait’s condo when she used to live in Los Angeles and sat outside for hours waiting to see if they saw her with Sam. ES blackmailed and coerced a minor, a 14 year old girl who was a super fan of Abbie’s sister, Charlotte Salt, into giving them info regarding Abbie and Sam. The girl was following Abbie’s locked Instagram account and could see the Sam related stuff Abbie was posting. ES won her trust, she gave them info about Abbie and Sam, they then told her if she didn’t screencap and give them the Sam related pics on Abbie’s IG account, they would tell Abbie and Charlotte that she had been giving them info. Sick doesn’t begin to describe it. ES tried to dox and did dox anyone and everyone who got in the way of their SamCait ship. Doxed, as in PUBLICLY posted, the names, addresses, pictures of their houses, professions, husbands’ and children’s names, employer names of ANYONE and EVERYONE who posted something to contradict the ship. They even posted pictures of their children. Again, messing with minors is a big no no, and usually a crime. ES created fake Ashley Madison accounts (that’s the website for married people who want to meet people to cheat on their spouses with) and pretended to be non-shippers’ husbands to try to make it seem like the husband was cheating. It got so bad, that in some cases, non-shippers had to get restraining orders, cease and desist orders, get the police, lawyers, and in TWO cases, the F B I involved. Yes, the F B I has come a knocking on a couple of Extreme Shipper’s doors because of their ILLEGAL actions. ES lured some of Sam’s girlfriends into believing they had their best interest at heart, gained their trust, and they PUBLICLY posted their PRIVATE messages. Luckily, in the case of one Sam’s ex, Abbie Salt, she later did confirm she and Sam dated, which totally negated everything that shipper had said Abbie told her.  ES directly BULLIED and HARASSED fans, Outlander cast, crew, journalists, reporters, family and friends of Sam and Cait. ES contacted people’s employers to try to get them fired...literally messed with people’s livelihoods. They tried to get the Outlander drivers fired because they started posting stuff against shippers AFTER shippers turned on them. ES waited outside Sam and Cait’s residences in whatever location they were in to try to “catch them together.” Taking pics at someone’s private residence is very different than getting pics or video in PUBLIC places. For years, ES have manipulated pictures, gifs, video to sell the SamCait LIE to their gullible shipper friends. They’ve made money off selling these lies. ES have ostracized and banished any shipper friends who acknowledged the ship wasn’t real. They sent their best friend to Tony’s bar in London to try to prove he and Cait weren’t together, and when she unwittingly found out they were, they then bullied her and kicked her out of shipperville. ES created multiple hate sock accounts for the SOLE purpose of CYBERBULLYING Sam’s girlfriends and dates. Any time Sam dates a woman, ES follow the same pattern. They contact the women’s employers, parents, siblings, other family members, friends, ex-boyfriends trying to malign the women. Some examples: They pretended to have gone to high school with Mackenzie Mauzy and spread lies that she had a bad reputation in high school. They spread lies that Gia was a paid escort. ES contacted social media outlets to spread LIES about Sam and Cait and their significant others. Contacted anyone associated with Cait and Tony’s wedding trying to intimidate them into saying there was no wedding. They posted the picture of a waiter at one of the Outlander premieres and tried to pass him off as Tony to prove Tony didn’t go with Cait. ES have continuously posted pics of Cait with her naturally poochy belly trying to prove that she’s been pregnant with Sam’s children for the last 7 years. ES publicly questioned her if she was pregnant. Sam haters and disgruntled ex-shippers have spread rumors that Sam is gay. Nothing wrong with being gay, but what is wrong is spreading LIES. ES have badmouthed Cait’s HUSBAND, Tony McGill saying he was: her assistant, gay, her gay assistant, a loser, broke, boring, ugly, her purse holder, etc. And trust me, what I’ve posted above is the SHORT list.

And that’s not even mentioning what they’ve done to ME. Ever since I committed the unforgivable sin of posting source info CONFIRMING Sam and Cait were never a couple, and Cait was dating Tony, way back in 2014, this is what SamCait Extreme Shippers have done to me. Tagged me endlessly when I had my Twitter account telling me things like “Die, b*tch,” “Die, c*nt,” “You should be gang rap*d,” “Drop a house on her,” “You’re worse than AIDS,” and those are the “nice” comments. They literally BULLIED me every day, all day for YEARS. They also created hate accounts on Twitter and Instagram to mock me, parody me, and post lies about me. They were convinced they’d found my real identity (based on circumstantial evidence, which I’ve countered and can counter with the actual truth), and proceeded to post THAT woman’s FULL NAME, city where she lived, profession, reported her to her licensing board, and created a fake Twitter account pretending to be her. She got a lawyer and was able to get everything taken down, but they basically tried to ruin her life. They’ve spread LIES about me being the one harassing THEM and managed to convince over 60 dopes with disposable incomes to give them money for a GoFundMe campaign where they hired a Private Investigator to try to find me. They started a witchhunt letter writing campaign, hashtagged it on Twitter, #takebackourfandom, or some such bullsh*t, tagged everyone in Outlander cast and crew “telling” on me and even sent letters and e-mails to Starz and Sony executives trying to...I don’t know what. Hahahaha. It’s so ridiculous, my brain is scrambling as I write this. They told their followers not to believe anything I say and that I’m evil personified. ALL of that and more because they couldn’t face the FACT that their SamCait ship NEVER EXISTED and I was the one that confirmed it. When I think about it, I can’t believe I lived through all that. But I stayed because I knew I had the TRUTH on my side and that eventually it would all come out, which of course it did. And because I’m a bad bitch who doesn’t scare easily.  EVERYTHING I’m referring to here is well DOCUMENTED with screencap proof. Or just ask anyone who’s been in the fandom long enough, they’ll attest that what I’m saying did actually happen, and that Extreme Shippers, Former Shippers, and Haters did do all of that.

So, Anon, when you come at me with “disgusting” things in this fandom, please refer to the above before you start pointing fingers at me. 

PS. “Anon,” I’ve got your Los Angeles/Anaheim Samsung Galaxy S10e IP address tagged. So, send me another hate Ask and you’ll get blocked. And don’t bother using a VPN...once the tag is on, it follows the user no matter what IP they use. Now you know. 

[fairycore-gyu]

𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒐𝒚𝒛 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏: 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒚 𝒄𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒊𝒓 𝒔/𝒐

⇒ listen to fairy by dvwn

sangyeon

“babe”

sangyeon really doesn’t strike me as a person who would have a lot of nicknames for his s/o, but when he does,, wHeW boY does he use it a lot. he probably uses “babe” more than your actual name. the nickname is more on the basic side, but he still loves using it and finds it very endearing.

jacob

“angel”

hhhhhh, where do i even start? this boy is literally the purest. he calls you angel way more than your actual name. he loves this nickname so much because it fits your relationship perfectly. whenever he looks at you all he can think about is how pure and beautiful you are. no matter how you look or what you’re wearing, he still looks at you as if you’re the most gorgeous person he’s ever laid his eyes on.

younghoon

“sweet pea”

this cutie!! the love you two have is like straight from a kdrama. he’s so in love with you it’s not even funny! he loves calling you “sweet pea” because it sounds cute and cliché and he loves the sweet smile you give him whenever he does. he uses that nickname quite often but he doesn’t really use it in front of the members cuz he knows they’ll make fun of him sjkfrkd

hyunjae

“prince(ss)”

ugh,, where do i even begin? this boy is so in love with you. he adores everything you do. he loves that you’re his. his princess. he loves how happy you make him feel 24/7. whenever you’re not giving him enough attention, he’ll whine and cling to you but when he calls you “princess”, you’re all his.

juyeon

“doll”

ok so. tbh, you take one look at this boy and all valid thoughts are out the window. but eSpeCiALlY when he calls you “doll.” the affect this name has on you is unbelievable. and he knows it. he uses this nickname when he wants your attention or needs a favour from you. “hey doll, can you please make some tea?” you’re at his service whenever he uses it.

kevin

“my star”

ITS YOUR MOONLIGHT BOY KEVIN!! no but seriously he honestly uses this name a lot with you because he’s your moon boy. he even called you “my star” or “star girl” when you were just friends because of how much he loved it. he loves the idea of your nicknames for each other being connected and he would even want to introduce you as “his star” but he knows he can’t sjhjsd

chanhee

“jelly bean”

this nickname also came from the time where you and the boys were playing bean boozled. and as you were putting the jelly bean in your mouth you immediately gagged and spit it out. what you thought was coconut flavor was actually spoiled milk. as soon as you spit it out chanhee busted out laughing and he’s called you “jellybean” ever since. 

changmin

“sunshine”

you’re his ray of sunshine. periodt. whenever he’s feeling stressed or tired he knows he can always count on you do be there for him to cheer him up. even if you’re not good with comforting words; when he sees your smile, all his all his worries seem to shrink. you often catch him staring at you with the biggest smile on his face when you talk about something you’re passionate about because of the way your whole face beams.

haknyeon

“butterfly”

this nickname is in reference to a date when he took you to a botanical garden and a butterfly landed right on your nose. you let out a little shriek but you didn’t want to scare it so you stood completely still. he quickly whipped out his phone to snap a pic before you scrunched your nose and it flew away. he has that pic as his wallpaper on his phone and constantly calls you “butterfly” reminding him of the moment he fell in love with you.

sunwoo

“precious”

this boy absolutely adores you. and that’s that. he constantly asking himself why he deserves you. he adores you so much and sometimes he doesn’t even think you’re real. even when he’s writing his songs and needs his space, he always knows that you’re a phone call away. you’re always catching him staring at you whether its from across the room or right it his arms. you’re the love of his life.

eric

“peaches”

WHEW,, THIS BOY. he’s absolutely obsessed with calling you “peaches”. your contact in his phone is “my 🍑”. he got the name from how squishy your cheeks are and how every time you get shy from something he says, you smile and your cheeks puff out and turn a light pink. this is also lowkey a reference to your ass but we’ll pretend i didn’t say that.

[lightsinthedistancee]

Darkness : Poe Dameron x Reader

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader

Words: 1.4k

Excerpt: “Darkness is a time of peace for you. A time to crawl into soft sheets, to curl up against your pilot. Some nights, to feel him lazily press a soft kiss to your forehead before his breath levels out in sleep. Others, to feel his hands roaming your body, feel him inside you.”

Summary: A short talk to Poe is always enough to cure a case of loneliness.

Warnings: Some sexual references

A/N: This is for @autumnleaves1991-blog Writer Wednesday. I actually originally meant for this to be a perhaps 500 word-ish Drabble but it ended up way longer obviously. But I’m really proud of it and love the concept of Writer Wednesday, so hope you guys enjoy! (Also, we’re just gonna pretend that phones and phone booths exist in the Star Wars universe...).

You’ve always found something lovely in darkness.

It’s simple, quiet, a constant that never changes, that rolls around at roughly the same time each night. Settles over cities and towns and every being in the galaxy in a thin blanket. Darkens faces into comforting anonymity, conceals the activities of lovers, provides peace in slumber for the weary.

There is a saying: One should not be afraid of the dark, but of what lies in it.

And after years of life, years of travel, years of experiencing the galaxy, you know that nothing sinister hides beneath darkness. No monsters, no demons, no ghosts. It is something that simply exists with no ulterior motive, something that is debatably hard to come by these days.

Darkness is a time of peace for you. A time to crawl into soft sheets, to curl up against your pilot. Some nights, to feel him lazily press a soft kiss to your forehead before his breath levels out in sleep. Others, to feel his hands roaming your body, feel him inside you.

In those times, darkness is there, still a constant. Hiding his features, hiding those eyes you adore during the daytime, allowing you to become entirely tactile, to simply feel him to the fullest, void of the distraction one’s most used method of perception, sight,  provides.

Yet tonight is a rare night. Your feet hit pavement as you walk quickly, hands in your coat, head bent towards the ground. You’ve been on this Outer Rim planet for nearly two months, gathering intelligence undercover, maintaining little to no contact with the Resistance, and therefore, Poe.

The darkness seems stronger than ever tonight. It slithers up and down the sides of buildings, seems to wrap around you in strings. In this moment, it is not simply a cover—it is suffocating.

The loneliness had been getting to you. Too many days going by a name that is not your own, too many days living in constant fear, too many days away from the touch of someone that’s always able to take your mind off of everything.

And that’s exactly what you need right now. A distraction. A brief moment to bind you back to everything you know, something you are slowly, imperceptibly slipping away from in your mind. The buildings seem to tower over you, to dwarf you. It’s an intimidation act, and you feel it’s working.

It feels as if you can sink into the asphalt, become one with the soil that had been so cruelly compressed by man-made rock. As if you can sink beneath and become one with the dead, the figurative and the literal that had most likely been so barbarously worked to death to build this historic city in the dark days of the galaxy.

You round a bend, turning onto the main street, and your eyes, adjusted to the dark, flare painfully as light hits you. You snap them shut on instinct, flinching. However, the object of your discomfort is not an unknown. This route had been walked by you every day the last two months, and the light is the same phone booth you’d been using to transmit information back to the Resistance due to the anonymous, unmonitored, and therefore, rare quality of it.

It is hardly used anymore, for everyone has their own personal holos, and this one is particularly beat up. It’s translucent walls are cloudy, it’s metal backing dented. Nowadays, it is probable that is it only frequented by drunks and Spice addicts and, well…you.

There is something ironic about the fact that this small, dilapidated booth is your only connection back to D’Qar.

But not ironically, perhaps in a poetically symbolic manner, it also shines bright in the darkness, eradicates the very thing that had been suffocating you moments earlier. It is almost a physical embodiment of hope.

It is also a universal rule that hope births more hope, and an unwise desire comes over you. One that could put the whole operation at risk. But resisting the temptation, it hurts. It’s agonizing, and you want to give in to it. You want to hear one voice. One voice that can wrap you in softness, encourage your imagination to conjure up the sensation of his touch.

And before you know it, you’re in the booth, dialing a long string of numbers you’ve memorized by now. A voice of a communications officer sounds.

You state your name.

“Security code?” the officer asks.

“Six nine eight oh seven three.”

Your eyes nervously glance around. Despite having done this a few times, the experience still makes your heart race. You can only hope that any observer would see only an ordinary lone figure, silhouetted in the light, making an emergency call to a friend because she drank too much or got her wallet stolen.

“You got information?”

“No,” you respond, letting out a soft breath and lying through your teeth. “I need you to transfer me to Commander Dameron. I have a hunch regarding something naval, and I need his opinion.”

You silently chide yourself at your quickness to over explain.

But luckily, the communication officer says nothing. “Transferring now,” he says.

You thank him, leaning against the inner wall of the booth, hovering the phone directly next to your ear. Moments of silence pass before a voice breaks it.

“Hello?” says Poe.

Every point of tension in you seemed to relax in a moment as your eyes slowly close. The timbre of his voice washes over you, through you. “Hey,” you whisper.

“Sweetheart?” He sounds confused. Above all, tired.

“Did I wake you?” you ask, feeling bad all of a sudden. The high that had been coursing through your veins moments earlier plunges back to the ground. The intensity with which you feel it is irrational, yet nothing in you mind is steady.

“Yeah, but that’s okay,” he replies, a slight urgency to his voice. “Is something wrong?”

You picture him in your shared bed back on D’Qar, shirt off like usual. Propped up on one elbow, sheets falling to his waist, holo to his ear, concern on his features. Concern at his love calling him in the middle of the night, her voice shaking.

“Nothing’s wrong…I just…I….” Your voice trails off, and a silence a bit too long elapses.

“Baby?” he asks.

Your breath trembles slightly as you let it out. “This was a mistake,” you mumble. “I’m sorry, just—“

He interjects at the tone of finality in your voice. “Hey…don’t go, sweetheart.” You hear him shift, perhaps sitting up. “Just talk to me. What’s wrong?”

“I miss you,” you blurt out. You’d meant to say it more eloquently, less directly, but that’s not something you have the energy for right now. “I miss everyone back on D’Qar. This assignment…it’s the most least contact with base I’ve ever had, and—why am I even telling you that? You know that.” You let out a frustrated breath, gathering your thoughts. He patiently waits, something you’re grateful for. “I’m just…having a hard time. That’s all.”

His energy transmits well through the phone. He’s thinking, the gears in his mind turning. You can feel the helplessness, for there is undeniably little he can do. “I miss you, too,” he finally says. “It’s a few more weeks, baby. I know you’ve got it in you…”

It’s a simple sentence, yet nearly reinvigorating in a way. Nothing that immediately lifts your mood, but perhaps something that briefly abates the hollow feeling within you.

“I’ll be there the moment you’re back.” His tone is soft, a little raspy with tiredness, slightly reminiscent of the way he tells you how much he loves and how amazing you are in a post-sex haze of exhaustion. It’s an odd relation, but the sense of peace that both tones hold is something you always cling to. “I’ll be there to kiss you. To hold you.” He pauses. “To take you to bed….”

The way his voice, on the last statement, walks the line between humorous and genuinely seductive makes you laugh quietly. It’s neither a common nor desirable combination.

“There’s that beautiful laugh,” he says softly, letting out a breath, returning to his previous demeanor. “I’ll be there, baby. I know you know that.”

You nod even though he can’t see you. Air brushes past your lips as your eyes flutter shut. “I know.”

..::::.. ..::::.. ..::::.. ..::::..

Taglist (for everything): @dark-academics-and-florals @theultimateslashgirl

Taglist (for Poe): @synical-paradox @spider-starry @paper-n-ashes

If you wish to be tagged on any of my future works, just let me know or do the form on my Masterlist if that’s easier!

Based on this Writer Wednesday pic:

[volleyball-dontknowher]

Kuroo NSFW Alphabet

A/n: THIS IS 4.5 pages of just Kuroo smut and I hope you like it. Today has been stressful to say the least and this was amazing for taking my mind off of all of my worries and I just hope you all understand!!! ALso only four requests lefttttt aaaah okay Natalie is done distracting you all from the real content here 

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

A+ Literally the absolute best like mans takes care of you more than he takes care of himself because you just blessed him with the best sex of his entire life and if he doesn't treat you like a queen he knows you could find someone who does, so he is up right away getting more blankets or a glass of water, or a shirt or socks like literally whatever you want or need he is going to do it, like this will be the time you see him simping the most and he is not ashamed. He also loves loves loves loves loves to cuddle with you and if you throw a compliment or two in there about how good he was his entire heart melts 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite part of you is your thighs like he absolutely loves how beautiful they are and the way they wrap around him so easily and how he can always put his large hand on your thigh and it both makes you squirm and turns you on, there are really no downsides to it and he loves it. He also loves leaving hickeys on your inner thighs because he thinks it’s super hot because one slip of your skirt and everyone can see that he so clearly made love to you. 

His favorite part of himself is definitely his toned chest like he absolutely loves when he catches you drooling over it and staring at him like it just makes him feel so manly and just so complete. He also can’t deny the fact that when he hugs you and sees how your figure fits on his broad chest it just makes him so soft like you are so pretty and so much smaller than him and he just loves it. He also loves the attention it gets from other boys in jealousy like they stare too. 

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Kuroo is one of the nastiest with his cum like he is not ashamed or embarrassed of it at all and it makes him dangerous. He loves to cum on your breasts, on your face, or on your ass if he doesn’t get the pleasure of cumming inside of you. When you do give him that pleasure of cumming deep inside of you Kuroo always makes sure that he tolds it deep within you for an extra moment as he feels you pulsing around him, when he finally pulls out he loves to just slowly push it back inside of you so that you stay full of his cum, completely claimed by him. Kuroo has strong(ish) opinions on blowjobs like if he can see you swallow he is going to be hard again in an instant and completely turned on by you and ready to go again. He will never say no to a blowjob but spitting isn’t as hot to him so he isn’t going to be as ready to pounce right after but trust me he still appreciates it just as much. 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Dirty secret, he absolutely bought a vibrating cock ring and used it to help him get off because he wanted the extra stimulation as he got off, but he first didn’t know what size and bought the small which was wayy too small so he had to go back and to get the large, which fit this time. So now he has an extra cockring and doesn't know what to do with it because giving it to someone would be weird. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Kuroo has lots of experience with quick flings from other girls, he knows what makes girls feel good from experience, unfortunately he didn’t really care if those girls got as much pleasure from it but when he met you everything changed. He started to really pay attention to what you really liked and what made you as loud as possible, he didn’t like the idea of getting more pleasure than you like it should be the other way around so he started paying a lot of attention to you and the ways you would moan and whimper when he did just the right things and went to being great at sex to being damn near god tier at sex. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

If you are having sex he is happy with the position in general but if you let him do it doggy style he is going to lose his shit, just something about the sight of you face down ass up gets him more than excited. Kuroo loves that in this position he is able to put his hands on your hips, around your neck, laced in your hair, literally whatever he wants and this also seems to be the position that makes you moan the loudest. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Kuroo is going to be more serious in the moment than goofy, but he isn’t going to let it be so serious that you can’t enjoy yourselves so if something embarrassing or funny happens he just plays it cool and not let it rin the moment. He does like for you to listen to him when he speaks and wants you to understand that he is in charge though so if you are having a rougher session he is completely serious

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Oh honey curtain matches the drapes no doubt, he doesn’t take the time to do the hair everyone sees so why would he take the time to do the hair only you get to see. He grooms down there sometimes, especially if he is going to send you pics or anything like that so it looks better but in general he doesn’t do much but wash it. 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Kuroo goes both ways during sex, half of the time he is going to be sweet and loving with slow roaming hands as he praises you and your body for how gorgeous and perfect you are He tells you how much he loves you over and over and when you are done pulls you into the sweetest kisses and loving embraces. The other type of sex is going to bo more pleasure based where he is teasing you and fuckign you hard, soley focused on pleaure, he might groan out your name a few times but other than that there isn’t much loving happening during those sessions. Afterwards though he is super duper sweet to you and literally praises the ground you walks on and like I said before he takes care of absolutely everything so if you need anything at all he is already on it and he gives you kisses and love for the rest of the night. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He still does it when you’re not in the mood, or if he feels like he is going to be riled up several times that day because he wakes up with morning wood more often than he would like to admit and some mornings you are able to help him out and some he just has to jack off in the shower so he can get his throbbing length down.. Trust me this doesn't affect his sex drive at all like him getting off in the mornings still leaves him ready for several rounds at night. He is definitely the type to do it in the shower because you are asleep right next to him and he thrusts his hips into his hand with his eyes shut imagining all of his deepest fantasies with you. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Kuroo is so kinky like you cannot be vanilla and expect for this to go well like he is into seeing you in every sort of position, tied up, choking on his cock, begging for more literally everything. We cannot physically talk about all of his kinks here without taking up way too much space so I will highlight a couple. Kuroo has a thing for being the dom, whether you call him sir, master, daddy, whatever he is the one in control and you are going to listen to every command he marks for you, if he says no panties you better not even think about it, if he tells you to go cook or clean nod and tell him yes sir before doing it. He also expects that you do not cum without his consent, ever. 

Another kink of his is going to be that he is really into bondage, he loves typing you up and making you beg for him like just seeing you give up control to him makes him so so turned on like you cannot imagine. He also loves edging and orgasm denial because it makes you whiny for him and desperate for him more than you can control because at first you let out little whimpers and try to get him to do what you want and after the second or third time doing it you are begging for him and pleading that he can do whatever he wants to you as long as you get to cum and not only is that absolutely sexy, it is also an amazing ego boost for him. 

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Kuroo’s favorite location is damn near anywhere, he is not afraid to fuck you anywhere in your house, literally anywhere, you have had sex on a chair out back before, as well as on the kitchen counter, if it worls it works. If he is horny enough or you tease him enough he will fuck you anywhere with no problems like he iwll pull you into a dressing room, the back of his car, on a blanket in the park, on the beach, literally tease him enough and he will not be able to contain himself. His favorite favorite spot is the bed, not because of the privacy, because well he doesn’t care if someone sees you, but because that’s where you can be as loud as you want and not worry about it as well as the fact that is where all of his toys, handcuffs and everything is stored so he can make you have a better time in the bedroom. 

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You are on Kuroo’s mind all day all the time and he just cannot get enough of you like you are his own personal brand of heroin So send him a nude, or wear lingerie, or even just lace your hands in his hair and he is ready to pounce on you and you know it. He also absolutely loses his mind when you use innuendos in public or reference something you did in the bedroom discreetly like he is not able to keep himself together. Another thing that gets him super hot and bothered is when you wear his clothes because something about it just makes you seem so vulnerable and so completely his that he can’t help but get hard almost instantly 

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Kuroo would not be okay with leaving marks on you, like a spanking here or there or a hickey is one thing but people who use whips or anything like that is a no go from him. He also doesn’t like the idea of candle wax on you because that seems very painful and would burn your skin so that’s out. He also doesn’t do any of the hardcore humilation things because he does love you and care for you and that just feel so wrong. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Oh he loves a good blowjob trust me, his hands rake into your hair as he lets out quiet praises and mutters how good of a job you are doing and compliments everything about you and your body, like give him a good blowjob and you could literally steal his soul no questions asked he is yours forever. But hear me out here okay he is absolutely in love with eating you out like he is going to have you sit on his face, or he is going to bury his face up into you as his tongue perfectly flicks, licks and sucks your core until you are screaming and moaning. If he doesn't get you moaning out his name like a prayer he hasn’t done it enough, he loves to completely over stimulate you and just keep pushing orgasms out of you with his tongue, his skill is completely unmatched and if by the end of it you aren’t completley spent you know that means that he is ready for more sex after that. Kuroo loves hearing how needy and desperate you are as his tongue switches between thrusting up inside of you and toying with your clit. He is damn near god tier at eating you out and he thinks about it constantly, he is obsessed with the way you taste and the way you moan and clench your legs around his head, the whole thing is intoxicating for the both of you. 

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Kuroo goes both ways with this like on rare nights he is going to be kissing you and making love to you in every meaning of the phrase, he is kissing you and going slow to make sure that you are feeling every inch of him as he enters you slowly, keeping the pace just fast enough that you will both feel the pleasure of release together but slow enough that you can take the time to appreciate each other and all of the love between you both. 

Other nights Kuroo is going to be fast and rough with you, going hard enough that you can barely focus on anything but the pleasure as you let out incoherent moans of his name as he pushes you quickly through several orgasms making you moan out his name. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Yes. Absolutely. You have a couple of minutes before you have to go you better pull down your pants and hop on his length because he is going to quickly pump you full and leave you breathless before pulling your pants back up, kissing you and letting you go about your day. LIke seriously if you have ten minutes he is going to have enough time to make you both orgasm and cum screaming each other’s names, it’s perfect, he is going to like quickies all the time like at least a couple nights a week because he just gets so excited by you and knows that a little bit of sex always boosts both of your moods. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He is willing to try a lot of things in the bedroom and if you are really into something he is so down to trying it because he wants you to get the most pleasure out of it as possible so he is going to be super open to trying new things. Now he is also risky in where you do it like he will do it in semi public where he is more than 80% sure you won’t get caught, he clamps his hand over your mouth will he fucks you quickly and quietly trying to make as little noise as possible. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)’

Stamina is Kuroo’s strong suit like he can go for at least three solid rounds in a night that last at least half an hour each, he has gotten really good about waiting until he cums until after you because he loves how it feels when you clench down around him and he finds you so incredibly attractive that he is hard again within minutes. On nights where he doesn’t think he can go multiple rounds he is very good at making it last upwards to an hour as he coaxes several orgasms out of you. 

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Kuroo is absolutely in love with toys in the bedroom, okay, like he is going to have at least one of everything and that is on the safe side. A couple of his personal favorites are the matching butt plug, dildo, and gag he got you that let’s say he loves to see you choke on all three. He also loves pressing a vibrator agianst your clit while he is fucking you, making the intensity that much stronger but he always makes to let you cum, he also loves seeing you use toys on yourself when you are out of town, he video calls you and makes you grab very specific things to pleasure yourself all under his control. Kuroo did discover that pegging was something that he was insanely into, the idea of giving up control (but not really, he was still absolutely in charge) was erotic and gave you both a power play that you needed. On himself he also discovered that he likes when you lock him in a chastity ring, at least for a little bit because he loves knowing that you will be his only source of pleasure and he is not able to please himself on his own, or even get hard, but he has to be in a really submissive mood to let this pass. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Kuroo would tease you literally forever just to hear how beautiful your cries and begs are for him like he is going to go slow and run his fingers up and down your body appreciating every part of you while hitting all of the spots make him moan and cry out for him. He is going to love teasing you and making you literally beg and moan for him to do everything because it shows him how completely his you are and how desperate you can be for him while you are under him. He also loves to tease you out in public like he is going to get hard and just press his length against your backside subtly while you are out and about to give you the message but if you try anything back his scolds you for being needy and desperate for him. He also loves to pull his shirt up and expose his muscles when wiping off sweat just to see you staring back at him. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Kuroo is loud and he has no shame in it. Primarily he lets out deep primal grunts that come from within him whenever he is really enjoying whatever it is, he lets out deep and loud moans that encourage you more than anything else. When he really gets close he starts letting out high pitched whines and starts whining out your name between profanities that are the hottest noise known to mankind. When he isn’t close he loves to let out deep moans and praises into your ear letting you know how good you are doing for him and how tight you are. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Kuroo has always wanted to wear lingerie like he wants to wear something that has the same reaction from you that he gets when you wear lingerie. So he went out shopping and quickly realized what was for men was not for him at all so he got himself a sexy one piece womens outfit and wore it in the bedroom and the look on your face was worth everydime and he loved the attention he got it more than he could have ever imagned and now he thinks about it all the time because that lead to some of the best sex of your entire lives

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He has a beautiful dick, like the most beautiful dick, it is about eight inches and just wide enough your hands can’t reach all the way around it, he stands straight up with two prominent veins, one down the side and one down the back and his head is always a bright pink and leaking with precum. 

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He has some of the highest sex drives you will ever see, he could do it up to ten times in a day before wearing himself out, typically he likes to do it 4+ times a week going for two to four rounds each time but if you are tired or don’t want to he is completely satisfied jacking himself off and going to bed but if you are willing to he is happy going at it every single night making you scream out his name and fucking you so good you fall asleep instantly after

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Hear me out, Kuroo can and will not fall asleep unless he knows that you are satisfied and comfortable, if both of those conditions have been met then there is absolutely no telling when he is going to sleep. Sometimes he takes about thirty seconds and some nights he is up until four in the morning just laying there admiring you and playing games on his phone, it really just depends on the night. 

[prionguy-old]

hello enderwalk arg people

so i saw a cool thread from @/ranbeans on twitter and it inspired me. so naturally i spent five hours straight analyzing ranboo’s lore playlist

basically i think it’s a timeline of c!ranboo’s life, and it fits kind of eerily

everything’s below the cut (and it’s a lot) :]

prologue from starkid 

 - more clock references. it’s literally just an instrumental of a clock ticking

 - instantly you think of the ender text in that pic he tweeted. like that, this could relate to dream’s clock, or foolish’s clock (reading 10:33 always iirc) 

 - note that butler in tales from the smp: masquerade kept staring at a clock

 - it could also mean a theme of running out of time, or fighting with time

 - in the thread i linked, the person also points out that there are 23 clock ticks in prologue, and angel number 23 means that you are meant to be a servant

 - this would be his beginning

introduction to the snow by miracle musical

 - the first of many songs from the hawaii: part ii album on this playlist

 - i’ve seen that album described as an arg and i find it funny if ranboo just went no. my arg now 

 - introduction to the snow only has one verse, and the rest is instrumental

 - the whole hawaii album has themes of loneliness and death, especially loneliness for this song

 - it talks about feeling isolated, which gives hints about his childhood maybe?

 - the “you’ll live forever tonight” lyric also gives off a hopeful vibe, like that of a child

dream sweet in sea major by miracle musical

 - starts with a changed reprise of introduction to the snow

 - "Rather than trying to “live forever”, it seems that the time has come for something else" from the analysis of the first part in genius

 - odd because this song is meant as a finale to the album, but it's towards the beginning of the playlist (could mean that there was almost an ending of sorts early on for c!ranboo, like a near death experience?)

turn the lights off by tally hall

 - okay this one confused me when i was first going through, but when the timeline started coming together it made more sense

 - about adolescence, and being uncomfortable with growing up, so it fits with the timeline playlist theory 

 - also about phobias and stuff like that in a way?? hm

the mind electric by miracle musical

 - the song starts out in reverse, then plays the stuff from the beginning normally

 - feels like a rls honestly i wish he could use this song

 - it's about someone put in an infirmary and condemned to electroshock therapy because they're insane. fun

 - this is where the timeline started to come together in a way. as soon as i saw the mood get darker i remembered ranboo’s line from the festival i think? “don’t let it happen again” or something like that

 - because of this, if the timeline theory is true, at some point before he joined the dream smp he did something which caused him to be condemned

 - also this

 - the mind electric isn’t the only song where the narrator glorifies themself in a way, we’ll get into this later

 - also the rejecting fanatical views,, i am thinking about that theory that endermen are servants to the ender dragon. if c!ranboo rejected that, the consequences could have been awful

live and let die by paul mccartney

 - if i wasn’t sold on the timeline theory before, i am now. after the mind electric, the mood changes drastically in terms of ideology and theme

 - this specifically made me say “holy shit” because like. that verse means that when you’re young, you’re open minded and say “live and let live” which resembles the optimistic but lonely attitude of the beginning of the playlist

 - but then when the world fucks you over, you begin to say “live and let die.”

 - “live and let die” i take to mean as him no longer caring about the people around him. how before, he wanted to help others, but then the mind electric happened, and he just. stopped caring

 - fun right!! /s

ruler of everything by tally hall

 - there are so many clock and time references in this. we get it

 - "mechanical hands" when it says “mechanical hands are the ruler of everything” refer to hands on a clock, saying how time rules over everything

 - the narrator is talking back and forth with time itself in this, which is interesting because i believe he joins the dream smp in the next song

 - the narrator appears very insecure and looking for a quick way to appeal to everyone (like how c!ranboo at the beginning was trying to be everyone's friend)

 - this is the second song with the narrator glorifying themself out of insecurity. what are you trying to tell us about your character buddy

 - also we can’t ignore this shit

 -  i don’t need to explain why this scared me right. right

merry go round of life from howl’s moving castle

 - this is a change huh

 - god i haven’t seen this movie in years, but i saw looking it up that it plays at the beginning introducing the main character, sophie

 - this is before everything changed for her

 - maybe this is when he joins dream smp? and ruler of everything is him talking to dream prior?

 - or maybe im reaching who the fuck knows

 - but him joining dream smp to this song would make sense. it feels like a clean slate and starting over, which would match with how he doesn’t. y’know. remember things

 - which begs the question: if ranboo forgot everything from before this song in the timeline, and after that i’m assuming his memory issues started,, what happened to cause this?

 - i’d say the mind electric could have caused this, but it was awhile back in the playlist. so whoever he’s talking to in ruler of everything, which could very well be dream, i believe messed with his memory somehow.

killer queen by queen

 - c!ranboo girlboss arc canon??

 - i got lost here ngl. it has a very specific vibe that doesn’t match well with what i know of c!ranboo im sorry

 - but two songs later, i get a hint kind of which makes me believe this could be him burning george’s house with tommy

 - also this song is a banger and i’m pretty sure he put it on there to scare the crown arg people because of the “baroness” line /j

mr. bad guy by freddie mercury

 - literally just more funky villain vibes. i love this

 - no more angst only girlboss

 - since cc!ranboo has said he doesn't want to do a villain arc, i take this to maybe be how he sees himself?? credit to the crown arg discord for that idea they’re smart and cool

 - if that is true, i’d say this would be another song for the “glorifying oneself out of insecurity” list because the narrator is like. seeing himself as cool and The Bad Guy, even if he might not be

 - possibly the butcher army if the next song is what i think it is

ain’t no rest for the wicked by cage the elephant

 - i have been informed someone saw ranboo listening to and grabbing songs for this off of a playlist called "my villain arc" king i hate you /lh

 - in seriousness: the song is about how the world forces people into wicked roles for money. i am getting live and let die vibes, like how both blame the world for making them not care/do bad things

 - c!ranboo take responsibility for your actions challenge /j

 - this definitely reminds me of how when he gave techno his armor, he blamed it on peer pressure. if this aligns with that event, the last two would be burning george’s house and butcher army i think

i can’t decide by the scissor sisters

 - this is probably about enderwalk

 - i really hope it's about enderwalk

 - did mr ranboo commit murder?? manslaughter?? sir

 - i really feel like this is enderwalk or ive forgotten something

stardust crusaders from jjba 

 - thank god for jjba fans, i know nothing about this

 - apparently this is the main theme for jotaro, who's power i think?? is like moving faster than time

 - and his main villain thing is dio, who's power is stopping the flow of time

 - and we're back with the fuckin time references

 - this is pure speculation at this point, but maybe it’s like. him fighting against time in a way, which would draw back to ruler of everything

a mask of my own face by lemon demon

 - the song is about not wanting to take responsibility for their actions again

 - c!ranboo i am begging

 -  specifically this lyric

 - also this lyric draws back to the bidding, in which the singer wanted to be enough for someone and showed almost narcissism as a sort of "mask"

 - also just. mask can be correlated with dream or the masquerade, where the butler stared at the clocks

stranded lullaby by miracle musical

 - been awhile since we had a hawaii album song huh

 - and,, a memory reference.

 - that lyric is talking about forgetting things

 - the rest of the song is,, im not saying time traveler ranboo but time traveler ranboo (look at this post about that theory by my friend pspspspsp)

 - he's talking to a "you" this whole time, and i have no idea who it is lmao

 - there are mentions of dreams and stuff throughout, so i almost want to associate it with the prison visit, but then i think the next song is after the festival so i guess not?

 - might also be him losing the memory book

hidden in the sand by tally hall

 - this is, lyrics wise, a song about a man whose girlfriend left him for someone else and he's upset

 - but if you look at the music video, it shows a cruise ship, on which people are friendly with each other at first, but when it starts to sink, they turn on each other trying to escape

 - i am feeling a connection to c!ranboo's views on "choose people not sides" somehow

 - i feel like he's called people selfish in lore, but my friends and i are all ranboo kinnies so we cant fuckin remember. if he has, then yeaH this definitely correlates

now i’m here by queen

 - there's a very optimistic and nostalgic tone to this

 - this one’s barely annotated on genius so i don’t have a lot for it, but i feel like it's after the dream voice disappeared or something? timeline's gettin a little funky

 - it could also be right before the festival, as he used optimism as a shield there

& by tally hall

 - this. yeah. & deals with opposites, especially good and evil. the singer talks about how everyone sees the world from their own perspective and doesn't look from another

 - and that definitely ties back to how ranboo wanted l’manburg people, like tubbo, to see from techno’s perspective

 - i feel like this is right after the festival. it resembles a lot of ranboo's speech from then, where he basically told everyone “sides dumb. just vibe”

 - and then the outro changes tone, almost like a warning?? which. yeah. a warning to choose people not sides before doomsday, or else they won’t be able to stop l’manburg from being blown up

i’m gonna win by rob cantor

 - this song is about someone fighting their inner demons

 - sounds familiar!! looks directly at dream voice

 - specifically, the singer is optimistic about winning their fight with the inner demons

 - it seems kind of chilling to me though, but it's also late at night when i’m doing these notes so it may just be me

 - if the timeline theory is true, this is where c!ranboo is mentally atm, which tracks honestly

=), an unplayable track

 - ranboo why do you hate us

tl;dr: ranboo’s songs that he would use for lore playlist might very well be a timeline of c!ranboo’s life, from even before dream smp and that’d be super cool

if you read all the way through this just know i would die for you

anyways feel free to drop your interpretations of the songs in the notes :0

[trashyswitch]

The Strange Flower

Logan and Roman take a walk in the imagination. Not long after, Logan is plagued with the giggles and phantom feelings! What ever could they be from?! Whatever it is, Roman is loving it!

I'm gonna be gone to the cottage for a week starting today. So, I'll be working on fanfics a little, but less than usual. It's a vacation!! I'm actually really excited!

This fanfic prompt came from @little-lee-lo-simp. Thank you so much for the prompt and I hope you enjoy the fanfic.

These are the morning Giggles:

Logan was walking around with Roman in the imagination, admiring the many flowers and trees surrounding them. There were so many colors! And so many different fruits and things hidden within the trees! From creatures to vines and flowers, it was beautiful.

There were poppies with smiley faces on them, different fruits that were covered in ‘paint splash’ syrup, there were lettuce bits that could be fresh, sweet or crunchy depending on your preference, and there were banana-shaped fruits that had edible skins and pomegranate-like seeds in the middle of the fruit.

There were vines covered in pickable sticks that were edible and used for healing purposes, and twisty flowers that had yarn-textured petals yet, were still real and growing on their own. There were thick leaves that held different-colored inks in them that could be used for mixing and writing, and there were thin large leaves that could be written on like paper without ripping when written on with a stick.

Many flowers looked like they were squirting different things. One flower had honey running down the stem. They were labelled ‘Buzzy suckles’, a wordplay of honey suckles. There were even different colored roses that looked like they were splashed with layers of watercolors. Red, yellow, purple, pink, they all covered the roses in a drippy paint-like pattern.

Logan smiled as he knelt down to look closer at the small cluster of roses. “These are beautiful, Roman.” Logan reacted calmly, filled with awe and delight.

Roman smiled at the complement. But when he looked upon the flowers that Logan was looking at, Roman tilted his head in thought. He...didn’t remember what he had called those specific flowers. Obviously they were a type of roses, but he liked to give them a spinney, cute kinda name to go with them. But...Roman had forgotten this particular cute name.

But he most certainly remembered how beautiful they were! “Thank you!” Roman replied.

Logan picked one of the roses and put it behind Roman’s ear. Roman giggled at this and wore the rose with confidence and pride. The flower started blooming little sticks that had...rectangular flags on them? And they had the gay flag on each one of them!

“Awww, it knows you’re gay!” Logan reacted.

“Yup! This flower can specifically tell what sexuallity you are. If you were straight, you’d have a straight flag. If you were pan, you had a pan flag. If you identified as multiple things…” Roman looked at the flower and pointed to hated multiple Gay pride flags that popped out. “Each of these flags would be different, to identify what kind of person you are.” Roman explained. “And if you’re more than 3…” Roman poked it and watched as a single LGBT flag poked out. “The LGBT community flag will pop out, specifying anything!” Roman explained.

“I love it!” Logan reacted.

“You can also use this flower to find out what you are in a few seconds.” Roman added.

“But it still has the usual sexuality journey, right?” Logan asked. “Cause everyone needs a journey.”

“Yup!” Roman replied proudly.

Logan continued to look around at the different varieties of flowers and plants that filled the imagination. There were even weeds that looked surprisingly pretty! A few of the weeds had pretty leaves and pretty flowers that were hidden within it. Even the dandelions were nicer to look at. They were more of an orangey yellow color, and were slightly bigger than the usual dandelions.

But in a specific spot: a small field of these strange flowers had been planted. They were blue flowers that looked a lot like Morning Glories. But...they resembled a heavenly blue version, and had a very visibly yellow middle. “Wow..I’m gonna head over here.” Logan decided.

Roman didn’t think much of it. “Okay.”

Logan walked to the blue and yellow flowers, and laid down inside the flowers’ fields. They looked so pretty...and very detailed when he looked closer at them. They had these dark green leaves that extended out of the stem. The flowers actually looked like they were dancing in the wind like Groot did in Guardians of the Galaxy. It looked really cute. It also seemed to be spirting out tiny bits of pollen. Logan tilted his head and placed a finger closer to the pollen. It was yellow looking, like all pollens were, and looked fuzzy.

Strange...

Logan got up and walked away from the pretty flowers a little while after. He dusted off his fingers on his shirt and pants to get rid of the pollen and walked to Roman.

“You have some really pretty flower and plant ideas. I love them!” Logan reacted.

Roman smiled eagerly. “Thank you! I worked really hard to make sure every single one of my flowers were distinctive and different in their own way.” Roman declared proudly. “Now: Cherry?” Roman asked, holding up a black cherry to him.

Logan smiled and took it. “Thank you, Roman!”

The two boys walked themselves out of the imagination and back into Thomas’s house. Logan was feeling a bit of an itchy feeling, but he didn’t think much of it. He just kept scratching it and continuing with his day. But soon the itchy feeling turned tickly. And it started spreading.

Logan attempted to ignore the feeling and hid his smile, but it felt like a single finger was scratching at one side each. It was distracting and made him wanna tense up. Soon, the feeling moved to his ribs. It felt like poking and wiggling in between his ribs. Logan could barely hide his smile without looking like a doofus that was trying not to laugh at a stupid joke. Logan looked away from Roman in an attempt to cover it up. But Roman could tell something was up.

“Logan...What are you smiling about?” Roman asked. “Are the smiley flowers making you smile?” Roman asked, referring to purple poppy’s that had a smiley face on each petal.

Logan shook his head and hummed ‘no’.

“Huh...I thought that may have been it. What’s making you smile, Logey Bee?” Roman asked. Logan accidentally let a giggle slip at the weird and strangely cute nickname. “Ooooh, you’re a giggly bee! I see now!” Roman declared. “What’s making you so giggly?” Roman asked.

Logan shook his head and couldn’t stop the giggles that left his mouth more and more. That’s a good question! What IS making him so giggly? He’s never like this!

“Iiiiis it a funny joke?” Roman asked. “Hey I’ve got one for you:” Roman cleared his throat. “What do dentists call their X-Rays?” Roman asked.

Logan frantically shook his head. Even if it wasn’t funny, any amount of jokes is gonna worsen his giggles!

“Tooth Pics! Dentists call X-Rays tooth pics!” Roman declared proudly.

Logan squeezed his eyes shut. That was a bad one...An obvious joke- “Hehehehehehehe!” Logan giggled. SHIT!

Roman gasped. “PATTON! PATTON, I MADE LOGAN LAUGH AT A JOKE!” Roman shouted. “YESSS!”

Logan growled through is giggles. “Nohohohohoho! Stahahap ihihihit!” Logan begged. Logan covered his belly as his inner stomach was attacked with the strangest phantom tickles he’s ever felt in his life. “Thahahahat tihihihicklehehehes!” Logan giggled, nearly falling over. He was beginning to lose his balance.

“Tickles? What tickles?” Roman asked, getting closer. “Does your belly tickle? Maybe your sides? Or your neck?” Roman asked.

That word was enough to throw Logan into full on laughter, mixed with giggles in between. “HAhahahahahaha! Rohohohomahahahan whahahat dihihihid yohohou puhuhuhut ihin yohohour flohohohowehehers?” Logan asked.

“Well that depends. The smiley Poppy makes you smile uncontrollably. The blue and red Mushrooms make you overly hyper. The morning Giggles make you- Ooooooh…” Roman turned to Logan. “Did you cover yourself in the pollen from the Morning Glory flowers? You silly, giggly goose!” Roman teased. “Those are called Morning Giggles! They make you giggle and laugh through means of tickling and softly teasing your ticklish spots!” Roman declared.

Well, that seemed to be the most conclusive answer.

“But when did you get in contact with the morning giggles? You never struck out on your own until the end- Oooooooh…” Roman smirked and leaned into his ear. “You brought this upon yourself, Giggle berry~” Roman teased.

You could say that again...He really did get himself into this. But why didn’t he warn him!

“If I had known you were gonna look at the morning giggles, I would’ve warned you! But nope! Telling by the spot you’re holding so tensely, it looks like you decided to lay on your poor, ticklish belly to admire the beautiful, giggle blooms!” Roman declared. “Does that sound about right?” Roman asked.

Logan finally kneeled over and flopped onto his side with laughter. With his feet free, Logan started kicking and squirming on the ground, unable to contain any of it. The pollen was tickling everything it touched. His belly, his thighs, his nose, his neck, his abs, his feet, the tops of his feet, even his armpits were partly covered in ticklish pollen! It felt like the pollen bits were jumping around and snuggling into Logan’s ticklish spots on his body! Even his hands were being tickled by the micro-sized pollen bits! What a strange conundrum!

To make things even worse, Roman’s teases were flustering him beyond saving. Logan was practically the color of a strawberry! How dare!

“Aww! Listen to that sweet little laugh! It’s so fun and cute!”

“You should laugh more often, Logan. It suits you! And you of all people know, laughter is very good for you!” Roman teased.

Logan covered his face and cowered into the fetal position.

“Where is my camera? I need to get a picture of this. Or maybe even a video! Or 5!”

Logan whimpered and whined. “SHUHUHUT UHUHUP!” Logan ordered.

“Are you whimpering now? You be careful doing that! Patton just might think there’s a puppy in this house!”

Logan whimpered again and covered his mouth. Just about every part of Logan’s front side was being tickled by the bits of pollen. It was so much tickling at once.

“HEHEHEHELP MEHEHEHEHEHEHE!” Logan begged.

“Hmmmmmm...Maybe in a bit. I wanna enjoy this for a little longer! Then I’ll dust you off!” Roman decided. “How’s that?”

Logan whined and groaned. “FIHIHINE…”

Logan handled the tickling for a little longer, despite his want for it to stop. It was getting to be too much light tickles for him to handle. “Ihihihit’s soho lihihihihight!” Logan reacted.

“Ohh! Do you want more? Does the blueberry Logan bean want the stronger tickle tickle tickles?” Roman asked politely.

“Yehehehes plehehehehease!” Logan begged.

Roman nodded. “Your wish is my command, your royal blueness!” Roman grabbed Logan’s hand and started tickling his palm.

Logan’s laughter TRIPLED in volume! “OHOHOHOHO NAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” Logan screamed!

“WHOA! Okay! What’s up with you?! You sound like you’re gonna rip a vocal cord if you keep screaming like that!” Roman reacted.

Logan cackled and laughed hysterically as his hand was attacked by Roman’s hand. His hand was moving the pollen around, which only made it tickle even more! And the pollen in Logan’s armpit was more free to move around, making the pollen tickle much worse in that spot too! There was just so much tickling!

Not that Logan minded, of course…

Logan squeaked, squealed, cackled and snorted through the whole thing. “OHOHOKAHAHAHAY, OHOHOKAHAHAHAHAHAY! EHEHENOHOHOUGH! IHIHI CAHAHAHAHAHA!” Logan couldn’t even get some of his words out properly at this point.

That was when Roman realized he should probably stop. Roman let go of his palm and placed it down. Then, Roman summoned a big broom-like paintbrush and brushed off the pollen. Though the pollen did end up coming off (Which lessened the tickling), the brush itself tickled as well. Even with the shirt and the pants on, it tickled! Logan giggled and squirmed around as Roman brushed the pollen off his poor body.

Roman soon stopped and looked at Logan. “Alright. I have a new plan.” He decided. “Let’s get you into a shower to let the pollen wash off you.” Roman decided.

Logan nodded as he held his belly somewhat lightly. Roman walked to the shower, started it up, checked the water, and left the bathroom so Logan could get in.

30 minutes later:

Roman was playing a game on his iPad when Logan walked in with his hair somewhat wet, and his body in new, yet identical clothes. Logan had a small smile on his face. “That was quite the ordeal.” Logan admitted.

Roman giggled. “I’ll say. I guess you gotta keep in mind the morning giggles from now on. And some of the other ones I mentioned.” Roman added.

Logan sighed and looked at him with a serious face. “I have another idea:” Logan picked up a sign that said ‘Morning Giggles: Pollen makes you laugh’ on it. “How about placing signs in front of the plants?” Logan asked.

Roman nodded and took the sign he made. “Thank you Logan. That’s a better idea than I could’ve come up with!” Roman reacted.

“No problem.” Logan replied. “Though I will say…” Roman turned to face Logan as he continued. “I would consider laying in the morning glories- giggles again.” Logan admitted.

Roman bursted out laughing at that. “Yohohou know you can just ask people to tickle you, right?” Roman added.

“Yes, I am aware of that. But doing that would ruin my image. I would much prefer there being an uncontrollable reason to my giggles and laughter.” Logan explained.

“Okay. Suit yourself.” Roman replied, sneaking a poke to both sides.

Logan jumped and shot a wobbly glare at him. This just made Roman laugh at him more.

Roman’s imagination is filled with thousands of different flowers. But only one flower’s pollen can make the most monotone person laugh beyond their years:

The Morning Giggles.

[feralnumberfive]

The Rewatch Academy: Episode 6 of Season 1

“The Day That Wasn’t”

I am in no way a good analyst so my little analysis and speculations probably sound a bit goofy or pretty wild and probably mean nothing at all. Everything I put into this post about each episode is purely what I noticed or thought, whether it’s funny or serious. I will be making jokes, so please just leave it at that (in no way am I trying to make fun of an actor and or character!) I am also in no way saying I noticed this stuff first. This is just what I noticed while rewatching these episodes

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| 1x01 | 1x02 | 1x03 | 1x04 | 1x05 |

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☂ Klaus is lucky that he never got the briefcase shot up

☂ *Hears Klaus flush the toilet and talk* Luther: Oh good, you’re up

☂ Also Luther gave Klaus about two seconds to get up before hounding him again on getting downstairs

☂ Sounds like Tom’s accent slipped a little bit when he said “three days”

☂ Yeah they needed to have a family meeting right away and yet they took the time to go get coffee or at least order it and have it delivered

☂ “Old bastard” and “Our little psycho” 

☂ I still don’t get at this point how they wouldn’t believe Five. Look at him, he himself is evidence of his time traveling! He was gone for 45 years, but to them it was only 17. Either way they try to grasp at that, Five would look older if he made it back without messing up. He knew about their father’s death without anyone telling him. I really think all the mistrust comes from the way he looks and the way he acts (they obviously believe he’s just crazy right now)

☂ “What did Five even see?”

☂ Also throw back to 1x02 and I didn’t realized this until now but Five doesn’t have his tie

☂ I know it’s for the title card gag but no one questions the random umbrella falling and popping open

☂ I aspire to be as sarcastic as Hazel

☂ So where exactly is The Commission HQ at? Is it a random location in the real world? If so then wouldn’t normal people happen to stumble upon it? What about their location in space in the comics? Is this in space?? All we know is that it’s in/based off of the year 1955

☂ “I’d like to discuss the logistics of my family’s safety at your earliest convenience.” He cuts right to what’s most important to him. No “How will you stop the apocalypse?” or “What’s my job?” and even “How will my body replacement work?”

☂ Five sounds almost like he’s snapped back into a work mindset. He's suddenly polite and calm with The Handler. Maybe being back in a work environment has made his brain automatically switch into being more professional. However he might also be acting this way to try to throw her off of him being antsy with a plan

☂ Here's some Commission posters shown throughout 1x06

☂ One of us, one of us, one of us-

☂ So basically The Commission makes up history? How do they know what to do and when to make something happen? How do they know it’s right? And what’s The Commission supposed to do when the world ends? Haven't they already fixed stuff in the past or are there just continuous time loops so they need to make sure things happen over and over again? If multiple historical events happen with multiple ways they are made, then which one gets to be in the original timeline??

☂ Dot: No hard feelings! 😁

Ma’am does it look like he’s going to accept that

☂ Wait why are Hazel and Cha-Cha considered the best Temporal Assassins if Five was/is the best?

☂ Well Five has the job of taking down the Hindenburg again but this time from behind a desk. So it’s possible to accomplish “corrections” without actually having assassins do the work. So I guess there’s just so many timelines that they need to fix every single one of them over and over? That sounds like a pain in the ass

☂ TUA portraits!

☂ Y’know I have to agree with Allison on this one. Vanya was left out, however she’s offering to talk with her about the important family matter and Vanya is just denying it. I get she’s upset, but her sister is offering to include her. After Vanya leaves Allison immediately wants to go after her to talk with her. On the other hand Allison should have told her it was an emergency meeting and that they didn’t have the time to ask Vanya to join them

☂ Klaus seems genuinely concerned/upset for Vanya

☂ “We need to figure out what causes the apocalypse. Now, there are loads of possibilities. Nuclear war, asteroids.” Wow spot on, Luther! I can’t believe they actually included foreshadowing for both apocalypses (even though technically it was a chunk of the moon, not an asteroid.) I wonder how much foreshadowing for S3 was put into S2.......

☂ I know it’s big joke about Luther and the moon, but the poor guy just really believes that he was on the moon for an important reason. I mean if I were in his shoes I would believe him too since he had to send a lot of daily updates and samples

☂ “Klaus shockingly has a point. What gives us a win this time?” Shhhh careful Diego, he’s right behind you

☂ Luther is initially the only one onboard with Five on trying to stop the apocalypse. All the others want to go off and do their own thing before the world ends. He tries to get The Umbrella Academy back together to work as a team, but his leadership skills are now severely lacking. Do people *cough cough* mainly people who hate him *cough cough* overlook Luther wanting to also get his family together to stop the apocalypse with his family? Definitely. 

☂ “We need the full force of the Academy to stand a chance.” Well golly gee, Allison, what did did Luther just try to do? Was that not him trying to round up all of The Umbrella Academy to stop the apocalypse? 

☂ Even though Vanya is ranting, how does she not hear all the creaking metal and shaking cars?

☂ *it’s sunny around them but just the block they’re walking on is rainy until she calms down* “ThAt’S a CoInCiDeNcE.” 

☂ The hall floor and Diego’s floor are so dusty

☂ It’s sweet that Diego wants Klaus to get clean in a safe way instead of going cold turkey 

☂ Dot, what does “utter silence” mean to you?

☂ “Look at you, deadly little thing.” You’re not wrong, but I don’t think he appreciates being called “thing”

☂ Such a smug smile

☂ So how does Five know all of this about Karl and his son? Does it talk about Otto never washing his hands in the file? That seems like an oddly specific detail but I guess in a case file it gives as many details as possible for the worker to figure out who needs to get assassinated

☂ There are a few cog references all relating to The Commission, so I wonder if this is a nod to “Teenagers” or if they’re just using this terminology

☂ Odd tattoos (sorry for the super blurry pic)

☂ “Can I ask you a cuckoo bananas question?” Hazel is such a fun guy

☂ “Wouldn’t it be nice to kill who you want for a change?” You mean like straight up unhinged murder? 

☂ The first time I watched this Hazel and Cha-Cha scene I for sure thought that Hazel was a dead man

☂ This scene just absolutely breaks my heart 💔

☂ *skips 25:24-27:42*

☂ Diego is just so accepting to everything Klaus is saying

☂ I’m sorry, are we suddenly on the set of The Phantom of the Opera?

☂ Diego, I think you’re forgetting a very important person in your life who you let down too who is also dead......(poor Ben can’t believe what his brother just said so he leaves)

☂ “Ordinary is not a word I’d use to describe you.” You’re right, it’s “Extra Ordinary” ha! Sorry Vanya, I had to use that joke

☂ Well at least we know Five ate a sandwich 

☂ How exciting! The same division that made a simple candy taste like a candy from the past, but technically it’s not the past since The Commission HQ is based in 1955, is building a human body! That sounds so promising 

☂ Sooooo whatever happened to Five’s new body? Is it just sitting in a lab somewhere?? Or is The Handler just lying about it to try to get Five to stay at The Commission?

☂ With the amount of time Five was staring at the suit, it obviously hurt him to know that while he has a new body within reach, he’s not going to get it because he’s about to leave

☂ “Course it’s a bit easier to see from 30,000 feet.” What is she talking about Reconnaissance aircraft? There was no mention of aircraft though so why would she bring that up? My closest guess is that she’s referring to strategic bombing in general, or even the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki

☂ It sounds like Five suddenly has a New York accent when he says “operator” when talking to The Handler about Gloria

☂ Fuck you, Veggie Tales Hargreeves

☂ *skips 36:47-39:48*

☂ Well there’s your hit, Klaus

☂ I love the camera moving with Klaus as he falls and the transition into Vietnam

☂ “Lock and load, Charlie’s away!” Wikipedia’s definition of a “Charlie” is  an American military slang referring to the Viiet Cong and North Vietnamese soldiers

☂ Klaus desperately calling out for a medic hurts my heart

☂ Well Luther if you had left then your body wouldn’t be the way it is now

☂ *fucking skips 45:41-50:00* 

☂ Ooooh I just really love the entirety of the “Kill Of The Night” scene! If you listen to the lyrics it’s about someone luring someone into a trap to get revenge because they messed with the wrong person (it’s also about love but we’re going to ignore that part). I personally believe it’s aimed at The Commission from Five because the entire time it plays he’s messing things up for them and in some way it’s like a little bit of revenge from him

☂ Why is Gloria confused on who Hazel and Cha-Cha are? Hasn’t she heard their names a ton of times especially since they’re some of the best assassins?

☂ How did Five know which tubes to put the messages in? 

☂ You can see at this part how Five immediately gets anxious and antsy. He has a wild look in his eyes. From this point onwards he’s constantly moving, shaking with energy, anticipation, and probably a little bit of anger

☂ “You’re a great disappointment to me.” That’s definitely not the first time he’s heard that

☂ “I don’t belong anywhere thanks to you. You made me a killer!” The first part of that stings. Obviously he feels like he doesn’t belong anywhere, but again I think has to do with the whole “good” and “bad” thing that’s going on. He feels like he doesn’t belong at home because he’s “bad” and has done a lot of dark stuff to get home (it doesn’t help that Luther voiced his acknowledgment of this  to Five and now he has that in his mind that Luther knows and somewhat views him as “bad”). Five 100% feels shame in what he has done, and definitely has an issue of coming back to his family with blood on his hands form what he has done. He doesn’t belong in The Commission anymore because he doesn’t want to stay there to do their dirty work to kill or give out kill orders. He’s done with that or at least wants to be done with that life.

The last statement though is Five taking his anger and guilt about being becoming an assassin out on The Handler. She brought him into The Commission, which in turn he became the best assassin across The Space-Time Continuum. It’s not something he’s proud of, and he never enjoyed killing (as much as I want it to be the DNA alteration I just don’t think it exists in the show or at least not yet). However The Handler replies with “You were always a killer. I just pointed you in a direction.” which you can immediately tell has struck a chord with Five. For the briefest second he looks taken aback and his eyes ever so slightly open wider in shock, whether he took that as the truth or just a terrible accusation isn’t exactly clear. Either way he doesn’t like being accused or hearing the truth out loud of always being able to be murderous, a killer. 

I believe it’s a mixture of The Handler just trying to get into his head and a combination of the truth. Reginald trained The Umbrella Academy to use brute force, but that doesn’t mean Five had killed anyone but he was definitely violent when it came to stopping bad guys (not to mention in the pilot script he was called a “Ruthless little war machine” after violently attacking and decapitating a bunch of mannequins)

☂ Diego: I’m going to go kill Hazel and Cha-Cha!........Riiiiight after I get done walking with my mom in the park

☂ He’s so happy to see Klaus again 

☂ ✨Gremlin✨

☂ Who exactly does Five owe a debt to? Maybe his family after accidentally leaving them and now he wants to save them? Or is it a singular person?  

☂ Ouch! Now that’s what I call a problem later!

☂ 

☂ Five using “Ya’ll” is weird to hear

☂ Five is talking to his siblings like he knows what’s been happening but in reality he’s rarely been at home so how would he know

☂ I love that Five doesn't even answer Diego at the end and instead just stares at his siblings 

☂☂☂☂☂☂☂

Feel free to comment or reblog with things you have noticed too!