#also i drew these awhile ago and my dude

[peachhcs]

jealousy, jealousy

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

will does a bit of stalking on his burner account

1.7k words

here's a bit of will's groveling while talking with the guys from back home. if i had a burner account, i would also stalk my ex on it, so will's kind of real for that haha

au masterlist

will's eyes glued themselves to his phone screen. he didn't mean to click into samy's account, but one thing led to another and his fingers just typed away the password to his burner account that the girl had no idea he had so he wasn't blocked there.

he just needed to look. a check-in? what sounded better than calling it plain stalking? at least gabe and ryan weren't there to peer over the boy's shoulder and chirp on him for stalking his ex.

the boy's fingers slid through her profile. he hadn't seen it in awhile, so when he saw four new posts in her feed since the last time he looked, he was immediately tapping into them. will's gaze slid over every single photo.

samy's smile was wide and bright as she stood with hannah and their other friends. even her soccer photos captured her large smile and seeing it made will smile back. he always loved seeing her love soccer as much as she did.

the blonde scrolled until he stumbled onto a photo in one of her recent posts. the fourth picture out of the ten in the set was of samy standing very close to a guy will didn't quite recognize. his arm was wrapped around her waist and something in will pinched.

that feeling—one he had so long ago he hardly remembered it—started resurfacing the longer he stared at the photo. memories of samy's senior homecoming flashed in will's mind while he compared her date to the guy in this photo.

who the fuck was this guy? luckily, he was tagged, so will went to his account. it was public.

upon further inspection, the guy was their age, a soccer player for the men's team, and worst of all he had a similar photo of him and samy on his account too. actually, the brunette was in his feed twice.

they looked really close. too close.

will scoffed. the guy wasn't even that good looking. plus, he so wasn't samy's type. the boy clicked back into her account to inspect the rest of the photos.

for some reason he couldn't believe how happy she looked as if they didn't break up. she looked like nothing even happened, but that was how will looked too. at least he tried to.

suddenly, the boy's phone buzzed in his hand. gabe's name flashed across the screen and a smile appeared on the blonde's lips as she slid to answer the call. his friend's face quickly appeared.

"hey, did i catch you at a bad time?" gabe wondered when he connected.

"no, no. i'm in my room," the blonde chuckled.

"okay, good. ry and drew are with me too. they wanted to say hi," the dark-haired boy pointed his laptop towards the other boys who waved.

"hey smitty!"

"yooo, what's up!"

will smiled widely at their hello's, "hey, it's good to see you guys again."

"we miss you a lot here. it's not the same without our other guy," drew cut in.

"i miss you guys too. it doesn't feel the same not playing on the same team anymore," the blonde hummed a bit sadly.

that was the hardest thing about all of this. on top of going through a breakup, will's best friends weren't around to help him through it. he only saw them through a screen now.

"you start soon, right? in a week?" ryan wondered as him and drew sat behind gabe in what must've been one of their rooms or something. 

"yeah, i make my debut at the game next week," will nodded, excitement filling his system at that. he's waited since he was a kid to finally take the ice as an official nhl player and knowing that day was finally a week away didn't quite feel real. 

"dude, you're gonna be awesome. i wish we could be there to see it," gabe frowned a bit which made will frown again. 

"i wish you guys were here, too. how's boston been? the same?" 

"yeah, pretty much. tailgates, parties, practice, you know. the usual," drew commented earning small eye rolls from gabe and ryan. 

"mostly practice. coach wants us working extra hard this year after last season," ryan cut in and the blonde nodded. he figured coach would get on the team harder this season after they lost the ncaa finals without scoring any points. 

"what've you been doing though? are the guys cool?" gabe changed the subject. 

"oh, they're great. they've been showing me around the area and i think i'll really like it," the boy nodded. he felt content and the people on the team seemed like good guys, so he knew he was in good hands. 

there was just a few things missing. 

"met any girls?" drew teased with a large smirk. 

will's expression faltered while gabe and ryan glared in the other boy's direction. they didn't hound will as much about the whole breakup anymore, but the subject was still touchy and they knew for a fact will wasn't ready to meet other people yet. 

"dude," ryan mumbled, but will still heard him through the call. 

"uh, no. i haven't, but it's fine," the blonde offered a tight-lipped smile. the other three studied their friend for a moment, trying to decide if he was being truthful or not. 

samy's name wasn't one that came up a lot around them anymore when will was in conversation. they knew he didn't wanna talk about her, so they tried keeping her name out of their mouths as much as possible. they never even told him she visited last weekend to see them for their first home game of the season not knowing how that'd make will feel, but gabe decided to try his luck today with the topic. 

"uh, samy was up last weekend. she came and saw us for the first home game of the season," the dark-haired boy informed. he studied his friend's face for a reaction, worried that will would get mad or something. 

"oh, she did?" was all will said. 

"yeah, it was really nice of her. she was pretty excited for us. we took her out for dinner and everything, too," gabe smiled a bit. 

"that's cool. i'm glad she..she went out," will nodded while a part of him twisted. 

he knew the guys were still her friend, he just never really thought that she'd actually fly out to see them still when he wasn't there. plus, none of them even said anything to him about it last weekend. there wasn't even a story post about her being there. will knew his friends loved him, but did they really think they needed to hide whenever they were hanging out with his ex so he didn't know? 

"she asked about you..or well..we started talking about you a bit and she asked about you," ryan hummed making the blonde's ears perk up. 

"what did she say?" 

"just asked how you were. we said you were good. settled into san jose. she said she's glad you're doing good," ryan continued. hearing all of that made will's stomach continue twisting. of course she was glad he was doing good even when he (stupidly) broke her heart. 

"i haven't talked to her. i don't think she'd wanna talk to me anyway," will laughed dryly. 

"i'm sure she does if she asked how you were doing. she's not that heartless, will," drew chuckled some. the blonde could only manage a weak smile in response. 

"do you know if she's like..talking to anyone or anything?" will tried asking casually so it wouldn't seem like he was stalking her account and so the guys didn't know he resorted to the burner account to look her up. 

"uh..not really. i think she's just going on random dates. nothing serious," gabe shrugged. 

"so she is seeing people though?" 

when gabe nodded will felt his heart sink. he figured she probably would, but hearing it aloud hurt even more than he thought. 

"why do you ask?" ryan wondered, eyebrows raised. 

"no reason. i was just curious," the blonde attempted to play off his disappointment. 

"were you stalking her account?" gabe said because he knew his best friend well, even through a screen. the boy knew about the burner account because he saw it on will's phone a few months back when he caught him stalking samy's account too. 

"no." 

"will." 

"okay, maybe i was," the blonde rolled his eyes. 

"i thought she blocked you?" drew raised his eyebrow. 

"she did..i was just looking on my burner account," will admitted, embarrassment coating his expression. 

"oh boy," ryan muttered like he was unimpressed, yet he knew will would do something like this. 

"oh, come on. give me a break. it's not stalking. i was just..checking in?" 

"i think you should reach out to her. see how she is?" gabe cut in before ryan began arguing with him. 

"i told you, she doesn't wanna talk to me. she said she never wanted to see me ever again, so i doubt she'd want me to randomly text her. i'm probably blocked anyway," will mumbled knowing he definitely was because he actually did try and reach out to her about a month ago. his text went green, so that was a clear indication his number was blocked on her phone. 

"well, i hope you know she does wanna see you again even if she won't say it. i know she still thinks about you because she wears her charm bracelet and she's always stroking the shark charm i'm guessing you have her?" gabe raised his eyebrow. 

will immediately thought back to his farewell party where he talked a bit with mrs. hughes. the envelope had sat in his pocket all day deciding if he should find samy and give it to her before deciding it was probably better to have her mom give it to her instead. he didn't even know if samy would want it, so hearing that it was on her charm bracelet was a surprise. 

"i wouldn't think she doesn't want to see or talk to you too fast, will. you guys have history. you're like family. we're rooting for you guys," ryan said with a soft smile. 

the hockey player hummed, swiping out of the facetime to go back to samy's instagram. after another sweep of her recent posts, he did notice the charm bracelet sitting on her wrist. all of the charms were still there, even the ones he gifted her since she's had it. a soft smile spread across will's lips when he caught sight of the shark one. 

[adxrnunofficial]

HI! One of my friends talked to you on Tiktok and insta once and showed me your au and stuff and I drew this doodle awhile ago of Tom from it cause he’s my favorite:D and also this other one of Tom as the tenth doctor from doctor who!! I really like your robot au and your art it’s really good and a inspiration to me and my friend stay cool dude!1!

You guys are so sweet <33 thank you for your support and amazing fanart!!

[maxbytes]

dude LOVE your werewolf au! So I remember seeing it awhile ago I drew up a pink werewolf blorb I’ll make more serious stuff later

OUGHH <33

Also take that meme format you made

WEREPINKSTEVEN AHHH!!! oh my god it's been a while since i touched this au. your art style goes with it amazingly!!!

[peacelykerockets]

There used to be a huge fashion and sneaker community on Tumblr years ago. The one shoe that reminds me the most of that era is the Roshe Run. This shoe is iconic.

Before I got into sneakers to an obsessive level I used to think every Nike/Jordan was too expensive. I was a dude who bought cheap sneakers, Vans, Adidas shell heads on discount, Asics, etc.

When the Roshe came out I just remember the internet hype it had at the time and thinking that it was a super expensive shoe. I didn't really get the idea of fashion people, hypebeast, or sneaker heads caring about a cheap sneaker. Plus again, my idea of Nike was expensive shoes for people who really cared enough about sneakers to put down a lot of money. It was really the hype and the fact that for awhile you couldn't get your hands on a pair of these shoes since they were selling so well and were a hit with fashion people and sneaker enthusiasts. Turns out the shoe was inexpensive and a general released shoe.

I don't know what drew me to the Roshe, was it the hype? was it the super simplicity and sleekness of it? All I knew is that I wanted a pair.

I remember wanting the ones with the all black upper and white sole, or the OG Iguana color way (pictured) but I wasn't able to find any of the basic colorways at the time (early 2013).

This exact kind and type was the first pair copped. I loved these things even though just wanted the basic OG model with the mesh upper. But these ones were beautiful to me too.

It wasn't until year later in 2014 that I copped my second pair and it was the OG model but in this Gamma Green colorway because I wanted to start adding brighter colors to my style.

Eventually the Roshe lost popularity. Sneaker heads, fashion snobs, and hypebeast who once coveted the shoes for being cheap and minimalist yet stylish moved away from the shoe in a hipstery fashion. By 2014 the Roshe was everywhere, it saturated the market, everyone seemed to have a pair. It wasn't cool anymore. Adidas was looking for a Roshe like hit and after going through a few Roshe clones (SL Loop, Tubular Runner, Solar Boost), but it wasn't until the original Ultra Boost and also the NMD did Adidas have something to rival the Roshe in the style zeitgeist. Even though the Ultra Boost and NMD came in at much higher prices than the Roshe, booth shoes caught the eye of fashion conscious folks and sneaker heads. The Ultra Boost became iconic and pushed Adidas to an era of dominance where they were actually beating Nike for a few years financially. They finally had their simple minimalist sneaker, made better by Boost cushioning "technology" that was way more comfortable than the unnamed "foam" of the Roshe.

By 2015 think it was safe to say the Roshe was done with its run. Nike was doing everything to squeeze whatever mileage out of the shoe. Saturating the market with colorways, different materials allowing people to customize their own on the website, launching ugly sequel models that just looked bad. Eventually Adidas would come to do the same to the Ultraboost and the NMD, flooding the market and milking the sneakers into exhaustion until no one care anymore. Also "maximalism" came back into play by 2017 with a brief chunky shoe trend that toon inspo from the 90s, normcore fashion, and young people ironically wearing "dad shoes" like Nike Monarchs, New Balances, and girls who were were those huge platform Fila things.

But the Roshe sparked a revolution in sneaker design for a while, and I don't think we've seen anything like it since. Even though performance minimalist sneakers were a thing before the Roshe, the Roshe brought that to the casual sneaker market and had Nike's rivals scrambling for an answer. It was a puzzle piece in sparking the whole "sports casual trend" and had sneaker companies known more for their sports performance sneakers where people reappropriate those into everyday casual wear. The early 2010s rise of the focus on the purely "lifestyle sneaker" was sparked by the Roshe. You started seeing unabashed knock offs of a sneaker that wasn't very expensive from the jump.

But I can't talk the Roshe without talking the Yeezy 350 and 350v2. I remember when the first pictures of the Yeezy 350 dropped, a lot of people did not know how to take it, and it didn't look like much. A lot of us looked at it and immediately saw a Roshe knock off, and no one could be called delusional for making that comparison. Eventually we get to the 350v2 that has become more well known and widely worn than the original 350, and the 350v2 is an icon. Once the Ultraboost and NMD hype died out, Yeezy was the only thing really moving at Adidas and that was mostly on the 350v2 which with no argument is for sure the most popular Yeezy model released.

But I'm put one in the Air for the Roshe, and I wonder if love for this sneaker will ever come back around one day. Will we see a generation if kids nostalgic for the Roshe? Will Nike ever actually retro it? Who knows, but all I know is I loved, and still love this iconic lowkey masterpiece of a sneaker.

[autistic-council-spectre]

-kazoo music- happy spawning day ur old now ;3 @thecouncilwasright

art under the readmore!

local jock too busy flirting w someone to notice gremlin brother stealing his money

and a wonderful spider the best spider

[aobakukkii]

Wanna hold hands?

Bokuto x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: Bad jokes

Male Reader

Word Count: 1748

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You shouldn't have to worry about this. You shouldn't act like a 12 year old walking next to his first crush... Wait were your feelings actually much different?  

Anyway Bokuto and you decided to go to a Christmas Market together to fulfill some foodie dreams of yours and only a few minutes separated you from your date destination. Well it wasn't one officially, but this couldn't stop you from dreaming, because all hope for not hopelessly pining on the owl boy was gone for a long time. So it was only natural to indulge in your feelings.

Bokuto and you first met on a mutual friends hang out in a park many months ago. Just after you arrived however, your friend who came a bit earlier soon volunteered for the "Oh f*ck we don't have anything... Let's get some drinks!" group mission to the nearest supermarket which left you awkwardly standing at the sidelines. Two small groups had already formed, involved in whatever topic they were talking about and you being to shy to disturb anyone just played with your phone for awhile. At least until a guy way too big to go unnoticed plopped up besides you.  

"Hey you're friends with f/n aren't ya? My name is Koutarou."

You just nodded for the first statement "I'm y/n" you quietly responded.  

"Oh cool where did you meet them?"  

Introducing yourself was normally an incredibly awkward situation, but somehow it felt natural with this guy. He kept a flow of conversation, getting to know your daily responsibilities and hobbies among other things. It didn't feel forced or like he just wanted someone to yak at or anything, he kept everything on a level that made you feel comfortable although you barely knew him, except for the few things he mentioned like his huge interest in volleyball.

The spiky haired boy was genuinely interested in anything you told him and even hyped some of your interests as well.

With him you were more or less smoothly introduced back into the (luckily) small group he left earlier and despite the fact that you felt uncomfortable with all the attention of the others in the beginning, his huge presence while talking quickly took this burden away from you. For socializing with new people, it was an incredibly alright experience.  

As it turned dark he offered you to join them go and play video games at his place and even if you would have normally declined such a request from new people, "Yes" felt just right.

Looking back at it now, the massive amount of praise you received from Bokuto for your skill made the decision even better. Especially when the praise came from a guy who would deserve the title pro himself.

In general Bokuto became your hype man in no time. You could just breath and he would still be like "Yas that's my boy!".  

This wasn't anything special in particular, he was supportive of the people around him and especially his friends, but to you his intensity towards felt special. He made you feel special. And now you wanted to be his special one and make him feel just as special and happy as he made you.

However you were worried that you misread his kindness towards you. Because he really treated everyone that he liked amazing, that's just the kind of person he is. This big chunk of love called Bokuto's heart is the reason why you fell for him, but it was also was where all your anxieties came from.  

Back to the present at hand, Bokuto's hand was what you were drawn to in particular. You never wanted to grab anything that badly in your life. The thought of holding his hand made you all giddy.  

Focusing on it was another challenge you had to face, since that guy swung his arms around a lot when he was excited to go somewhere, which happened quite often. Luckily, he was focused on the story he was telling you and looking at the illuminations so your starring went unnoticed.  

That until one of his swings touched your arm and more importantly, your hand.  

"Oh sorry I wasn't paying attention" Bokuto laughed. He stopped his movements and slowed down his step a bit.  

"It's fine" you giggled to hide your massive inner panic. His hand just touched yours!  

"Hey hey hey we should focus more on the lights there! You see those around the tree over there? They remind me of your eyes bro."

You just hummed and mumbled a silent "thanks" in response, being blessed with the chance to look towards the lights on your right to hide your face from him.  

Stuff like this wasn't usually included in the all-inclusive hype man package for you. And it made your cheeks heat up even more than his usual compliments. In the past Bokuto loved to tell you that you were cute, saying that you're shy reaction to the compliment just made you even cuter.  

Honestly Bokuto crossed the line to teasing hype man a long time ago and threw really flattering stuff at you like spikes at the opponent in a game whenever he felt like it, but this was a first. He never said anything directly about your looks. In fact you never heard him point out anyone's looks like that. You heard "handsome" and "pretty", but never something specific.  

"I mean it, I never saw someone whose eyes were sparkling like yours."  

This was straight up flirting at this point.  

You hid your face behind your hand, still looking away.  

"Kou seriously stop it."  

"Can't help it if it's true."  

You knew Bokuto was good in reading you, but you thought your crush and the insecurities with it were a secret. At least until now. This setting, this compliment, the smooth delivery. You were maybe anxious about the topic of love, but not that dense. This was his sign that you were special to him.  

He did his part, so now it was time to do something yourself.  

A mix of the compliments' confidence boost, your newfound view on his feelings and the still present panic and shyness robbing you of the ability to think or act like a normal human being, you drew the most genius conclusion you had in a while. If you swing your arm a bit and touch his hand again and again, he might read you once again and notice your wish to hold hands and you guys can live happily ever after.  

"100% risk free strategy dude" you thought to yourself.  

A comfortable silence was in the air as you continued your walk. You could already see the market, but it was still far enough away to be heard clearly. Bokuto was admiring the view around you, the illuminations being his favorite part of each December.  

You tried to give it a shot. You slightly swung your arm and hit his hand with yours, so slightly that it just seemed like something that would happen normally.

Bokuto didn't react in the slightest and you were not sure if he even noticed it, but you weren't giving up just yet. Your childish tactic deserved some testing before being discarded. So you did it again with the same force and the same result. Time to step up your game.  

You planned on a slightly increased force for the next one, which your body executed as "Tackle that hand like it's a Rattata." A now fainted Rattata at that, because Bokuto suddenly stopped walking and looked directly at your face. You had just enough time to conclude that you can't read his expression at all before avoiding your face. Your mind worked on a quick list on of how often you should apologize for this awkward moment, hoping that he would interpret it as a mistake. Judging by his face and the awkward pause right now however, he noticed what you were going for, which was honestly impressive from this stupid plan. You really wanted to apologize right away, hoping that the embarrassing gesture didn't ruin your chances with him.  

Before you could say a word however, you saw a big hand around yours. You couldn't possibly believe your eyes, if not for the squeeze you felt and a small motion upwards, bringing your face to a happy and slightly pink Bokuto.  

"Geez all I wanted was a small confirmation from you before starting anything, but I didn't think you would be the type to go all the way" he said his voice although more quiet than his usual one still matched the grin on his face. "You could have asked as well you know?"  

"I just... Didn't feel like it?" you laughed between your words, being overwhelmed by the sudden confession.

Bokuto quickly pulled you to the side of the street, not wanting to accidentally block the path of anyone else right now and to give the two of you a tiny bit of more privacy.

"Y/n I really wanted to confess to you for a long long time, but I didn't dare to say anything before I could be sure that you were interested." He started rocking your arms slightly.

"When I have my moods and try to hide from the world, you're the first to come to seek me and pull me back up again. When I'm loud, you're the one who listens to my rambling anyway. I discovered so many cool games and shows thanks to you and, most importantly, I can count on you whenever I'm at my low and my highs. You make me feel special y/n, and I really didn't want to destroy that without a clear sign of you feeling the same way."

The rocking stops as he slowly starts to stroke your hand with his thumb.

"This wasn't the one I expected, but again that makes you special. Just like you make me feel." he chuckled. "Man I can't really explain it, can I just show you?"

His unoccupied hand pressed against you back, pulling you closer to his body. You were glad that he took the lead from here on because you were complete lost in the moment. He bent down to capture your lips with his. It was bit clumsy due to your excitement, but still sweet and it definitely showed what Bokuto intended.

You pulled away with flushed faces, both unable to hide your smile.

"This is what I had in mind"

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AN: So this completely self-indulgent fic is actually based on two dreams I had. When I already dream like in Fan-fictions, I might as well write them.  

Feedback would be highly appreciated. Thank you for reading ❤️

[shslpunkartist]

Hi this is very random and out of nowhere, but I feel I must share this while it's still relatively fresh on my mind.

So I've just woken up from a nap a couple of minutes ago, and during that nap, I dreamed that you posted this new drabble that's a part of a mini-series that's mostly just for fun. It's a crossover between system!au verse and main verse where system!au Keith, Cass, & Pico not only somehow found themselves within the universe of the latter verse but Cass and Pico are also somehow their own separate beings with their own physical bodies.

I sadly can't recall much else, but I do know that the first drabble was pure chaos for a good while. The three at first thought that they were still within their own universe but somehow got separated when they messed with- uh something I dunno but I do vaguely recall Zardy's name being mentioned so maybe some magical accident happened involving him??? IDEK - but whatever they thought it only made them separate from each other.

But then they come across some of the other crew - uh yeah it was Morgana and I THINK one of his pals or the whole gang - and Keith was wondering HOW does he explain who Pico and Cass are exactly (cuz one doesn't just go up to someone and say oh so my alters are now their own separate physical beings)- only for Keith to get bamboozled when the NG duo suddenly popped in, all "There you are, Pico! Sorry Keith, we need to borrow him for a bit! See you later!" then cue Pico being dragged off by them. Oh and almost forgot but you know the outfits system!au Keith, Pico, and Cass you drew them in? Well that's their outfits here. And yes Darnell and Nene did happen to notice the outfit "their" Pico is wearing and are just like "holy shit dude you look awesome" and wonder what Keith had to do to convince Pico to wear it, much to system!au Pico's confusion though he manages to play it off convincingly enough for them to not notice.

Oh and before I forget but they dragged system!au Pico off to... I honestly can't remember. I think it was to get some petty revenge on some asshole rich client?? I do know no killing is involved, more like they vandalized the shit out of some private property of the guy's while he was away than proceed to steal lots of cash from that he foolishly left there not unsecured - OH YEAH IT WAS IN A SAFE THAT HAD 1111 AS THE CODE AND IT WAS LEFT OUT ON A STICKY NOTE RIGHT BY IT ALL BECAUSE THE GUY SUCKS SO BAD AT REMEMBERING SHIT THAT HE LEFT IT OUT LIKE THAT - and then steal the credit card that he accidentally left behind. He also somehow never found out it was them who did this. But yeah, system!au Pico had a blast with Darnell and Nene who also had a blast too. They were rather confused by how different Pico was acting today but they decide to not question it for now. Plus it was admittedly a bit nice to see him act a little like how he used to. It reminded them a bit of the good ol' days when they were just kids who often get into mischief. Or at least something along those lines.

Back with system!au Keith and Cass, main verse Pico came up not too long after those two left and Keith, who was still struggling to process what's going on, didn't think to question about how quick Pico was done with whatever. He was about to ask what was that about and how did those two know him on sight- only for Pico to ask what's with the sudden new outfits. I did think he also asked why Keith was with Cass too but again I can't recall ashjsadjksd

ANYWAY I'D LIKE TO CONTINUE ON BUT THAT'S ALL OF THE MORE IN-DEPTH STUFF I CAN RECALL. What I do recall is that basically the three kept getting mistakenly for their main verse counterparts for awhile and somehow kept missing each other and it was just wild. I do know that it eventually comes to a circle (or whatever that saying was) and main verse Keith and Pico ends up meeting system!au Keith, Pico, and Cass. As for main verse Cass, she did too- at the very end when you left it all on a cliffhanger. I can't recall but main verse Damien was involved. I think he might have mistaken her for his Cass???? IDEK. All I know is that he's involved and then he does something that gets his Cass annoyed with him

H o l y s h i t

Dreams like these are fuckin' awesome, no joke. I think I've gotten at least two dreams like this - not with my cast, but just whole stories that I can actually remember. I love this

Might be a bad idea to add even more to my drabble list, but if I do get the motivation, I'l try to write this out. Seems like a really silly adventure~!

[kafka-ish]

coward | s.u.

y/n, bold and beautiful, is now second guessing herself when she finds herself skinny dipping with stan uris 

word count: 2.5k

warnings/included: fluff, steamy-ish, exhibitionism, fem!reader

request: (from anon) “could i have a request where the reader is v v v flirty with stan and one day he says something really dirty even richie's shocked. it’s fine if not.” 

a/n: i accidentally changed it bc i misread ur request im so so sorry !!! also if u noticed i haven’t written in awhile it’s bc my classes started up again so fics may take more time to write/post -- hope u understand <3

-

What came out of y/n’s mouth next truly shocked Stanley.

“Wanna go skinny dipping?” It wasn’t far off from whatever usually spewed from her mouth that she and the rest of the Losers had a hard time controlling.

His mind flashed to all the times y/n’s hand grazed his: the light touches, the silent stares, the whispers that tickled his ears and kissed his brain.

“Next year for Halloween, you should be Stan without a shirt.”  

The hearts she drew on his notebook when he wasn’t looking, the hand she held in hers, the what-are-we’s before giggling in his wonderstruck face that she was joking; it was all a sign of want that he’d been too dense to see before.

“You’re great, you know. Great at being an asshole.”

Sweet, mischievous y/n; always blunt, always careless of what others thought of her. It never occurred to Stan of what she thought of him.

Richie was the first to speak up, Stan still having to catch his breath from the promiscuous words that left her mouth seconds ago. ��Sure, toots, I’d love to see what’s under that suit of yours. God, you don’t know how much I hate that thing.” He laughed and Stan wanted to beat the shit-eating grin off his shit-eating friend. His jaw, pronounced and square, tightened and Richie saw. “On second thought, I think someone else would enjoy the view way more.”

Another laugh came from the group, but it wasn’t from Richie. It was y/n’s. The soft giggle leaving her luscious lips did nothing to calm Stan.

“Are you jealous, Stanley?” She asked. A smirk sat on her lips. She only called him by his full name when she teased him.

He definitely felt like he was being thrown a bone only to find out the pitcher never threw one right now.

“Of course not.” Stan gave her the side-eye, readjusting his position from the rock he sat on while doing so. “I can’t think of any situation where I’d be jealous of Richie.”

“Oh yeah?” Richie challenged and Stan squinted at him.

“Yeah.”

“I can think of one—multiple, actually.” Richie wore the same smirk as y/n—only his was less digestible. Maybe it was because y/n was less insufferable to be around, or because she didn’t take a crack at his religion every chance she had, or because her hair was soft and shiny on her head and something Stan wished he could run his hands through. Maybe it was because y/n was a girl, or because she was pretty and the way she batted her eyelashes made him see stars even in the sunlight.

“When?”

Richie leaned in and whispered something that was totally vulgar and jarring to Stan’s ears.

Stan flinched—unsurprised that his friend was ballsy enough to say such a thing, but because what if he had actually thought about doing such a thing?

“Gross, Ruh-Ruh-Richie!” Bill yelled from across the quarry, already knowing what his friend would say.

“Yeah. You’re disgusting,” Eddie said from next to him while he looked up at Bill.

“Ruh-lax. It’s not like it’s something I’m gonna do.” Richie opened a new can of Keystone Light next to his already half-drunken one. “I got freedom of thoughts though, right?” He winked and Ben rolled his eyes.

“If you already have a drink open you should finish it,” Stan instructed, ignoring the subject at hand.

“Don’t get your panties in a twist.” y/n sounded closer than she was before. Her arm brushed up against his and he thought she was about to hold his hand until her fingers grazed just past his to grab his can of beer. She took a sip. “Besides, it all ends up somewhere.”

She could be so careless with her actions. But this was the same girl who made sure paper and plastic went to recycling, the total opposite of Stan, a total enigma.

“I just think, if you want another one, you should finish the one you already have.” Stan explained himself clearly and concisely. It was something y/n always admired. She never got tired of hearing him talk—she could listen to him talk for hours on end.

“Whatever.” Her eyes rolled so far he’d thought they’d get stuck. “I’m going home. “Later, Losers.”

“Wuh-what about the sk-skinny dipping?” Bill asked and Ben elbowed him. He wasn’t yet comfortable in his body, though he had been on Derry High’s track team for a year and a half and lost a fair amount of weight (twenty-two pounds), he still wasn’t comfortable in his own skin (he didn’t think he’d ever be)—even around his best friends—friends he considered family.

“We can do it tomorrow.” y/n shrugged. “Sound good to you, Stanley?” Her eyes were only focused on him and Stan knew that. They glowered under the sun’s harsh rays and fixated on his figure.

“I don’t know.” Stan tried to sound as monotone as possible. “Maybe you should be asking Richie instead.”

At that, y/n smiled, leaving the rest of the group confused as she walked away.

“Duh-dude!” What wuh-was that?” Bill wondered aloud, astounded how y/n had him wrapped around her finger—or maybe it was the other way around.

“If I knew, I would tell you,” Stan said, holding the same shock in his voice.

“Are you and y/n like—”

“No!” The sharpness of Stan’s tongue cut Ben off quickly with a harsh glare he’d later apologize for. But it would be a lie to say that he didn’t want something with y/n. Another lie, that Stan would keep to himself, would be that he didn’t anticipate the events that were to come for tomorrow…

“Hey, stranger!” It was y/n from down below. She was already wading in the water—waiting for him, presumably.

“Hey, y/n/n.” He started for the long way down, not caring to cannon-ball ten feet down from the cliff of the quarry today. “Where’s Bill and Bev and Mike and Ben and—”

“—and Richie?” A beam shot across y/n’s face as soon as Stan met her eye line.

“And Richie,” Stan mumbled. That was the only thing he’d been worried about. Although he knew there was nothing about his trashmouth friend to worry about. But it was always best to stay skeptical.

“I told them not to come.” y/n said this with such nonchalance—such grace as she tilted her head into the water and drifted back, letting the water carry her away as if she were weightless.

“Why,” Stan asked, though it came out as more of a demand.

“Because.” y/n shrugged, but you couldn’t really shrug while you were trying to stay afloat. He noticed that her eyes were closed, and her bathing suit was still on. Maybe she was lying about skinny dipping and he had worked himself up last night over nothing. y/n was like that—making promises she never intended to fulfill. If it weren’t for y/n being, well, y/n, Stan might’ve been annoyed at her antics. But he wasn’t—far from it, even. He was infatuated with her being—clothed or not, enraptured with how sunshine she could be one hour and rain she could be the next.

Math and English were an easy feat—but trying to understand y/n was like trying to learn Mandarin blind and deaf.

Her curves spilled from the bikini bottoms that hugged her butt and the matching top she wore hugged her bust exceptionally. The bikini’s scandalous red color harmonized with y/n’s skin tone well and Stan couldn’t imagine her in anything else at the moment. He didn’t want to imagine her in anything else.

“Are you gonna get in?” Her presence startled him as she was quick to swim up to the rocks. “Or are you scared?” A sly smile splayed across her pink lips and Stan mirrored her.

“I’m scared?” He scoffed. “You were the one who said we were going skinny dipping.” He stripped himself of his shirt, revealing his pale, yet toned, chest. “Guess who’s not undressed.”

“You?” y/n guessed; the innocent tone surprising on her tongue. She had inadvertently licked her lips at the answer and Stan couldn’t seem to take his eyes off her mouth due to the action.

“No. You.”

“My bad.” A giggle escaped her bitten lips and y/n began to unclip the back of her bikini. “Is that better now?” The straps fell loose against her arms, but the top stayed covering her breasts.

Stan didn’t say anything.

“What if I…” y/n didn’t finish her sentence. Silently, she fully removed the straps from her arms and the contraption left her bodice.

“Christ,” Stan seethed out, but he wasn’t gentlemen enough to look away from the sight on display before him: y/n treading the shallow water that was crystal clear thanks to Mr. Sun that shone down on this part of town, giving Stan an eyeful.

“Don’t say his name in vain.” She had now slipped the bottoms off and Stan didn’t know what to do with himself. Get undressed, I guess.

His pants were the next to go as Stanley undid his brown leather belt that held his too-big khaki shorts together. His waistline had shrunk due to baseball season’s quick start. And although it was only early March, the heat had picked up fast in this small town they called home and Stan could feel himself already itching to feel the water on his sweat-stricken skin.

“What are you waiting for?” y/n called from below. She was growing impatient, but who could blame her?

Stan stood above her in only his underwear. If the rest of the student body was here, he would’ve been living out his nightmare—stripped to the bone with an audience to gawk at him. But only y/n was here to witness the grey Calvin Kleins that hugged his thighs and rather than a nightmare, this felt more like a daydream.

“Are you shy?” She teased. “C’mon, Stanny, there’s no need to be—”

“Shy my ass,” Stan interjected as he relieved himself of the last piece of clothing and jumped into the water all in a quick movement.

“Glad you could finally make it, slowpoke.” y/n splashed his face, disregarding his lack of clothes—both of their lack of clothes—but Stan couldn’t help but admire y/n’s skin that the water had already kissed and glowed under the flash of the sun.

He’d never seen her in such a state before. In fact, he’d never intended to. But this was worth it—even if it were the only time, he knew he’d have this memory burned into his skull forever the same way the sun would burn his skin the next day because he forgot to apply sunscreen. Since when does Stanley Uris forget to apply sunscreen?

“It’s rude to stare,” y/n deadpanned, but Stan couldn’t help it. How could he not take his eyes off her tan lines from up close and the divot of her collarbone? The way her hair slicked back from the water and the pout of her lips was all too tempting to not want to consume. Stan Uris would be an idiot to not stare. A polite idiot.

“You make it hard.”

y/n felt her cheeks heat up and she knew she wasn’t sporting a sunburn. y/n never burned. “Oh. Well, in that case, stare as much as you want.”

“Gladly.”

y/n was quiet now—a rare event, but it gave Stan an opportunity he’d never thought he’d get or go for.

He swam closer, the stroke of his arms creating rifts in the water and y/n shivered at the feeling of the coldness that hit her chest each time he got closer.

It was strange seeing him up close—in such an intimate setting. As big of a crush y/n harbored on the boy, it’s not like she did anything about it. A few remarks there, a few remarks there. This was the furthest they’ve ever gotten. Maybe a little too far now that she was considering it more closely. Since when did first base turn into skinny dipping in the quarry?

Before her thoughts could leave her second-guessing anymore, y/n felt her lips on someone else’s. They were pressed together firmly and tightly. She held her breath as if she were underwater, but her heart prevailed, only picking up at a speed she’d only feel when she caught him looking at her or when he laughed at her jokes.

The kiss was powerful and all she needed. If this were the last time they’d ever see each other again, she wouldn’t care, because she’d have that kiss to cherish. Maybe she’d long for one in the future. Just one more. But this kiss left her knowing that this skinny-dipping idea wasn’t so bad after all.

His lips were soft and tickled as he pulled apart to catch a breath. y/n’s eyes opened to find Stan’s pupils were wide and lustblown. She stood still in the water, amazed that anyone could feel that way about her.

“Wow.”

“Yeah.”

“Hey, Stan—”

“What?” Stan asked, eager and anxious for the words meant for him.

“This is embarrassing but.. I like you.” The words were bold and packed with courage—not far from the regular way y/n spoke, but this was different. It had a certain bite to it that Stan couldn’t quite taste.

“Are you embarrassed because you like me or are you embarrassed because you’re confessing to me without any clothes on?” Before Stan’s eyes could rake down to y/n’s body once more, a splash of water hit his face—cold and abrupt. His eyelids slammed at the impact and he flinched.

“You’re such a perv.” y/n scoffed as if she had forgotten her deepest secret had just spilled from her lips in front of the boy the secret was about. Secret. Don’t act like it wasn’t as obvious as a fat kid scarfing down their third brownie in the first place—

“You know if it’s any more embarrassing… I like you, too,” Stan said. He felt winded after saying it. His chest felt heavy and his toes dug into the sand in order to keep him from falling headfirst into the water. It was so easy for y/n. Brave, crass y/n who swore like a sailor yet had the face of a doll.

Stan’s train of thought was lost at the feeling of y/n’s body pressed against his. He’d forgotten they were both bare-assed and exposed for all of Derry to see because the warmth of y/n was all too much. His heart jumped out of his chest sixty miles a minute and the muscles under his arms were now stones. Stan didn’t recognize that her lips were on his until her tongue swiped his bottom one for access in which he granted.

Teeth clashed and tongues danced. It was a hot minute until y/n pulled away with a cheeky smile and lingering fingers on his collarbone that made Stan hold his breath.

“That was hot,” he heaved, finally cutting the silence between them. Of course, the birds still chirped and the water around them never stopped flowing. But the world just seemed to stop whenever Stan stepped foot into y/n’s intoxicating proximity.

“Hell yeah, it was.” One arm was still strewn around his neck while her free hand traced code on his shoulder.

Nothing else was said. Nothing had to be said. But Stan was sure of one thing; that y/n was no coward.

[loki-writes-things]

Desperado

Rating: M (18+)

Paring: Loki/Reader

Summary: you and Loki are out on a stakeout sexy times happen.

Author's Note: This is my first attempt at a reader fic, and it's also fairly spicy, so this is all going under a cut. Enjoy.

Ao3 link

You sat in the car. Stake outs always sucked, but you were stuck with what felt like the most annoying person in the entire nine realms. Loki. Your job was to watch a suspected Hydra hideout to see if anybody that could be directly tied to the organization came or went. Loki was here because he was on Space Probation and you two drew the short straws.

“Tell me again, why are we just staring at a building?” Loki asked, and you groaned. This was why he was annoying. He liked to bitch. A lot.

“Because your brother talked your father into not throwing you into space jail and instead sent you on space probation to serve as an Avenger.” You said, looking over to him.

“That’s not what I meant.” He said, deadpan.

“Because we’re trying to catch some hydra bastards, just pay attention, it’s your turn to watch.” You said, laying your head back on the car seat.

“I don’t see what’s so important about stopping this Hydra.” He said.

“Because they’re fascists, and generally we tend to frown upon them here on Earth.” You said. “Now can I please get some sleep?”

“I still don’t under-” Loki started, and you cut him off.

“Jesus Christ, dude, just watch the damn building.” You say, and shift. If you were honest….being this close quarters with him made your heart flutter. And you didn’t do fluttery feelings well.

Loki muttered something about mortals under his breath again for like the third time that night and finally turned to watch out the window.

You snuck a glance at him out of the corner of your eye. You had to admit he was...attractive, when he wasn’t greasy and raving. He cleaned up well. His hair was wavy when it wasn’t gelled back, and he had cut it shorter since New York a few months ago. His features were a lot finer than his brothers’ and he was all lean muscle instead of the Himbo that was Thor. Part of you wondered just what he looked like under all those layers. You swore you never saw him without at least two layers of clothes. Suit jackets, leathers, it seemed to hide his form. Your eyes trailed down, lower, but before your eyes could settle-

“Can I help you, Y/N?” He asked, raising an eyebrow as you jumped.

“Christ! Don’t scare me like that. I...I was falling asleep.” You said, trying to hide the blush creeping up your cheeks.

He got a...look in his eyes. One that made you nervous, and sent the butterflies in your chest into overdrive.

“And they say I’m a liar,” he said, his eyes glancing over you.

“I-look I’m not a liar, I was going to sleep.” you said, crossing your arms over your chest, trying to hide yourself from his gaze.

He chuckled, a deep, dark sound that sent a shiver up your spine and heat pooling in your stomach. “My dear, If I didn’t know better, I would say you were attracted to me.” He said, giving you a sharp grin.

“I-What-That’s absurd!” You said and shifted in your seat. “Look, you can stop toying with me now. It’s not funny.” You said.

“On the contrary, I find it quite amusing.” He said, tilting his head. “And much more interesting than the job at hand.” He said. “It is...fun to see you squirm.”

“Okay now you’re just being an ass on purpose.” You say. You were beyond able to hide the blush on your cheeks, and it was beyond obvious as to what he was doing to you.

“You’re pretty when you blush, Y/N.” Loki said, leaning in oh so close to you.

“I-Well-I…” You stuttered, leaning back. It wasn’t that you particularly minded him being this close, you just...well, you just weren’t expecting it. “I-”

“You talk too much.” he said, and suddenly his lips were on yours and you had never felt anything like this in your life. He smelled like cinnamon, and tasted like mint. You closed your eyes, leaning into the kiss. You reached up, running your fingers through his hair, and just as you started to melt into it, he pulled back.

“You do not know how long I have been wishing to get you alone.” he said, his voice almost growling.

“Good Lord, you had to pick now to do it?” You said, panting and flushed. “If you don’t get me in the backseat, I swear to god, Loki, I’ll never forgive you.” you said as you crawled out of the driver's seat, and into the backseat of the non-descript black sedan that they gave the two of you for the stake out. Which was now abandoned and you would have to come up with some bullshit excuse but right now none of that mattered because Loki was crawling in on top of you and god you never thought you’d get this far.

“Never done this before, this will be interesting.” You said, and gave a nervous laugh.

“What, have you never had sex?” Loki asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh I have, just not in a car. And you’re….quite tall.” You said, biting your lip as you looked over him. Damn, he was a fine man. You wished they’d given you an SUV, this was going to be cramped. “Fuck it, we’ll make it work.” you said as you pulled him back down into a kiss.

You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down in a hard, crushing kiss. He presses his tongue against your lips and you let him in, your tongues eager, exploring. You made a soft, needy noise in the back of your throat as his hands wandered over your body.

You gasped softly as his hand found it’s way up your shirt, cupping your breast through your bra, his thumb stroking your nipple. You whined, pulling away for air as he kissed your neck. You couldn't think straight, but even if you could, you wouldn’t stop. Fuck, he was good at this.

“Sensitive, are you?” he asked, smirking as he looked up to you.

You blushed a bright red. “I...Well, I mean, it’s been awhile. It’s surprisingly hard to get laid as an Avenger.” You said, huffing.

“It just makes it more fun to tease you.” He said, pressing his hips down against yours, letting you feel his hardness.

“Oh fuck you.” You said and bit your lip.

“I do believe that’s what you’re about to do.” he said with a chuckle.

“Dude. Just shut up.” You said as you kissed him once more, your hands working on the buttons of his shirt, pushing it off of his shoulders, along with the jacket he was wearing.

As you were working on his shirt, he was working on yours, pulling away to pull it up and over your head. He slipped a hand behind your back, searching for the clasp of your bra, and frowned when he found nothing.

“Front clasp.” You said with a grin, quickly unclasping it and letting your bra fall open.

He looked at you like you like he was starving and you were a hot meal. God, that was a hell of a look. He dipped his head down and teased your breast, his tongue teasing one of your nipples, while his hand teased the other.

You gasped, your back arching as he teased your sensitive breasts. “Fuck!” you gasped out. “Wait, wait.” You say, and he popped his head up.

“Is everything alright?” he asked, looking a little worried.

“Y-Yes just…” You said, and fished the comm out of your ear, before taking his out as well, and promptly yeeting both of them into the front seat.

“The last thing I want is for us to be caught screwing around on the job. Literally.” You say, and he laughs. It’s...nice to see him laugh. He’s so damn serious so much of the time. “Come here.” You said, pulling him close, kissing his neck as you trailed your hands over his body, exploring him as well.

He was lean, but a solid wall of muscle. You forgot that Asgardians were so much denser than humans were, and he was all lean muscle. You sighed, grinning as you found a spot behind his ear that made him gasp as you nibbled on it.

Your hands trailed down to the button of his pants and you pulled away to look at him, making sure it was okay. He nodded, and with that you unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, pushing them down his hips. You bit your lip and glanced down.

Oh fuck. Oh he was big. You look a breath and met his eyes.

“Think you can handle it, little one?” he teased, and that just spurred you on.

“Damn right.” You said and nipped at his lip, taking him in your hand and stroking him. You grinned, filled with a sense of pride as his eyes fluttered shut with pleasure.

Fuck yeah. You were able to make Loki melt. An honest-to-god Norse Deity, melted in your hands like snow on a summer day. Your ego was never going to deflate after this. No one could ever tell you that you were ugly, or not worth sleeping with because you made Loki, God of Mischief, moan your goddamn name.

He made a growling sound in the back of his throat and jerked your pants off your hips, popping buttons off as he did. You honestly couldn’t give a damn. You helped him shimmy you out of them and your underwear, letting them pool around your ankles.

“Usually.” he said, looking over you, “I would show you why they call me slivertongue. Unfortunately...I doubt we have the sort of room to maneuver.” he said.

The way he said it made you melt at the thought. “There’s always when we get back….” you said with a grin.

He cocked an eyebrow at that. “Aren’t you full of yourself.” he teased as he kissed you. “But I’d be willing to show you.” He teased as he slipped his hand down, teasing your folds with his fingers and making you whine.

“Oh….” You sighed and held his shoulders tight, crying out softly as he circled your clit. “Oh fuck.” you gasped softly.

“So wet for me already, so needy.” He breathed in your ear and you shivered.

“Please,” You begged, as he slipped his fingers into your cunt.

“You’ll have me soon enough, I have to make sure you are ready for my cock.” He said, his fingers slow and teasing, leaving you gasping and begging for more.

“Jesus Christ just fuck me already…” You begged, tugging on his hair, making him moan.

“Fuck…” he hissed, and then smirked, running the head of his cock over your cunt, before pressing in.

You gasp, hooking a leg around his hip, pressing him closer and deeper. “Oh my god yes…” You moan, tossing your head back. You were stretched full, and it was everything that you had imagined.

He held himself above you, and to your surprise, put a hand on your throat. Not hard enough to choke, but with enough pressure for you to feel it as he set his pace, slow and dragging at first, letting you feel every inch, before he picked up his pace.

“Loki…” You gasped, eyes screwed shut. You arched your back into him, digging your nails into his back, crying out as he fucked you. It felt electric, you saw stars with every thrust, and when you opened your eyes the little bastard was enjoying every moment of it.

He grinned, sharp and hungry as he watched you come undone. His control was impressive...and you were determined to make him lose it, but not now, everything was too much and not enough and-

“Oh god, Loki I’m coming!” You cried out, running your nails down his back and pulling on his hair. You came hard, seeing stars as every nerve in your body lit up like a Christmas tree. It was the best goddamn orgasm you felt in your life, and holy fuck you hoped you got to feel it again.

He fucked you through it, and when you opened your eyes his breath was ragged, he was close. “Inside, I-I-I’m on the pill just please, inside…” You say, breathless and begging.

With a couple of more thrusts he spilled inside of you, filling you up and making your toes curl. “Oh holy fuck…” You pant, falling back against the seat. You felt boneless. If he could fuck like that in a car...Jesus.

“Good girl….” he purred, running his thumb over your throat, giving it just a little squeeze before he let go and kissed you.

You returned it, slow and deep as you both came down from your highs. When he pulled away, surprisingly, he kissed your forehead. It was more gentle than you saw him be with anyone.

“I do believe we should do this again.” He said, smiling down to you.

“Please…” You say and nod, trying to catch your breath. “We should really get dressed before someone finds us.” You say, though you made no attempt to actually move.

“Rest. I’ll keep watch until our shift is over.” He said, pulling away from you, and you whine at the loss.

“Okay…” you muttered, already half asleep. You saw him fix himself back up, though he covered you with his jacket.

You fell asleep, sex drunk and happy as he climbed back into the passengers seat, looking very much like the cat that had the cream.

[saphyrenights]

*whispers sensually* scilescoe transformers >:3

Nonnie...nani?

“I-I-I don’t know how to explain it, Scott. It’s just...humanoid now.” Stiles grit his teeth and put the phone closer to his face. “And I’m kinda into it.”

There was a long moment of silence on the other end of the phone. “What?” Scott finally said. It was close to 2AM, and Stiles almost certainly woke Scott from a sound sleep. He expected the grogginess, but he needed to make sure Scott took him seriously.

“Look, I’ll send a pic. Hold on.” Stiles backed up to get as much of the baby blue behemoth in frame as he could in the deserted Dairy Queen parking lot. Luckily, he’d parked under a light, so the Jeep was suitably bathed in amber light. Enough for a photo. He snapped the pic and sent it to Scott.

There was another long moment of silence. Finally, Scott said, “Dude. What happened to your Jeep? It’s, like, really buff.”

“I know! Scott, you have to get down here and help me with this!”

“What do you want me to do, exactly? I’m not a mechanic.” He chuckled a little at his own joke. Stiles groaned.

Suddenly, the sound of metal scraping against metal cut thorough the relative peace of the parking lot. “Let me speak to him,” a voice rumbled in the darkness.

Stiles looked around to see who was speaking, but when he turned back to the now-human-shaped Jeep, the Jeep was looking right at him. It even flashed its headlights in Stiles’ face.

“Um,” Stiles gulped, his hand trembling around the phone. “I’m gonna put us on speaker. Okay?”

Roscoe nodded. Stiles tapped the speaker icon and held the phone out to the Jeep.

“Hello, Scott. This is Roscoe.” The voice rumbled around Stiles like thunder, sending deep vibrations into every corner of his body. Words failed to describe the experience, but a part of Stiles wanted to hear Roscoe speak forever. 

“You know how Stiles lets you drive me, on occasion? Do you want me to tell him what you sometimes do with your foot on my clutch when we’re stopped at red lights?”

“Wha-” there was a scuffling sound and a loud thunk on Scott’s line. A few seconds later, “How do...I mean...Stiles are you joking, right now? Did it just talk?!”

“Yes. And this is beyond awesome.” Stiles got a little closer to the Jeep and gingerly placed his hand along Roscoe’s now upright fender. Startled, he quickly pulled his hand away. The Jeep was warm. Roscoe emitted a low, rhythmic reverberation that may have been a chuckle. Stiles shivered, his cheeks paradoxically warm.

He spun away from the Jeep and spoke directly into the phone. “Scott, please get your ass down here before I engage in a crime against nature.”

“Yes, Scott. Please hurry,” Roscoe rumbled.

Less than 10 minutes later, Scott rolled up on his bike, still in his pajama pants, a thin flannel he’d tossed on over his tank top, and bedhead at maximum thanks to the helmet he’d just removed. “How did this happen?” he asked as he drew closer to Stiles. That was a question Stiles should have put more thought into before now, but he wasn’t about to admit that.

“Like I said, I can’t explain it. Magic? A spell or something?”

“Yeah, maybe. But I don’t sense anything magic related.” Scott paused and sniffed the night air. “I can tell you exactly who’s horny right now, though.”

“This isn’t about me,” Stiles muttered.

“No,” Roscoe said, suddenly serious. “This is about both of you.” He took a step toward them, and Scott’s claws popped out almost immediately in response. Stiles’ mind briefly flashed on the government issued 9mm he kept hidden in his glovebox, where ever that may be inside Roscoe’s rearranged body. 

Roscoe stopped in his tracks. “I do not wish to harm you.”

“Then what do you want?” Scott asked. Somehow he was able to see through the Jeep’s hotness and ask all the questions Stiles should have asked awhile ago.

Roscoe sagged a little, and Stiles could swear he looked...sad? “My people need your help. You see, I’m not the real Roscoe. I and a few of my compatriots have been sent here to find someone who can help stop the war that’s tearing my planet apart. We’ve been watching you two for some time.”

“And?” Stiles asked.

“We have witnessed your many accomplishments and determined that you are our best chance at defeating the great evil. Please, come with me.”

Scott looked at Stiles. This makes zero sense, his expression said. Stiles gave him the I agree with you, but let’s just see where this goes eyebrows. Scott rolled his eyes and turned back to the Jeep.

“What do you mean when you say ‘compatriots?’ How many of you are there?”

Roscoe smiled. “Assessing the threat. Very good. This is why we think you can help us.” He took another tentative step forward, and when Scott made no move to attack him, he continued. “We infiltrated a local Toyota dealership a few years ago based on intel we’d received about a group of fierce warriors who lived here.”

“Scott’s pack.”

“Yes,” the Jeep replied. “You two were the first, and so you will come with me.”

“Okay,” Stiles said. Scott tugged on the back of his hoodie to stop him.

“Dude, what the hell are you doing?” Scott asked him.

“It’s Roscoe, Scott. We can trust him.”

“We can tr-...Stiles, you’ve never trusted anything in your entire life. I know how much you love your Jeep, but did you miss the part where he said he wasn’t the real Roscoe? For all we know, this could be some kind of trap.”

“Scott,” Roscoe interrupted, “would you like for me to tell Stiles about my clutch, now?”

Scott released Stiles’ hoodie. “Are you blackmailing me? Really?”

“What’d you do to his clutch?” Stiles might not have been able to smell other people’s emotions, but he definitely recognized the cute blush creeping up Scott’s neck.

“Nothing,” Scott insisted.

Stiles snorted. “Liar.”

Roscoe swung open one of his doors. Scott and Stiles saw the inside had been transformed into something that resembled a cockpit. Stiles could barely contain his excitement; it’s as if all his childhood mecha dreams were finally coming true. But one thing immediately stood out to him.

“There’s only one seat,” Stiles pointed out.

Roscoe shrugged. “A minor design flaw. I assure both of you will be safe during our intergalactic journey.”

“Intergalactic?!” they said simultaneously.

Roscoe shifted his gaze up to the night sky. “My planet, Cybertron, is beyond the boundaries of your galaxy. We must hurry.”

Scott turned pleading eyes to Stiles. “I have an owl scheduled for surgery in the morning. And someone brought in a stray cat that’s going to have kittens any day now. I don’t want to add ‘stop an alien civil war’ to that list.”

Stiles gently squeezed Scott’s arm in sympathy, but frankly, Stiles was looking forward to being gone for awhile. Today was his last day of vacation, and a mountain of boring paperwork awaited him at him back at the FBI field office.

Also, Roscoe was hot.

“Will your people tell our family and friends where we are?” Stiles asked.

“Yes, of course.”

“See?” Stiles felt Scott relax the tiniest bit.

“And my bike?” he asked.

“One of my people will retrieve it.”   

Stiles grabbed Scott’s hand, and together, they approached the open door. Stiles climbed inside first.

“Hey, wait-” Scott couldn’t get the whole sentence out before Stiles had claimed the only cockpit chair and started touching shiny, multicolored blinking buttons in awe. Once Scott was also inside the cramped quarters, Roscoe close the door behind them.

“Where am I supposed to sit?” Scott asked.

Stiles reached out and hauled him down onto his lap. “Right here. It’s just like when we were kids.”

Scott apparently saw the futility in protesting, so he tried to make himself as comfortable in Stiles’ lap as he could. A little too comfortable. Scott was a warm, heavy weight in Stiles’ lap, and his body seemed to apply pressure to Stiles’ body in all the right/wrong places. After a few seconds of enduring the best kind of torture imaginable, Stiles tapped Scott’s shoulder.

“Um, Scotty? Buddy?”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. But if you don’t do something, this is going to be a really long trip for both of us, so can you maybe calm down?”

“My beloved Jeep is a person now, and I get to go to space with my best friend. Can you blame me for being excited about that?”

“Excited? Yeah, you are. In more ways than one,” Scott muttered. He slid back a little more into Stiles’ lap. Stiles choked off a curse. 

“Only one thing is gonna fix that,” Stiles said, his voice sounding a little huskier than he intended. “Maybe two.”

“Oh, my God. You’re the worst, Stiles.”

“If you really believed that, you would have asked me to switch. But you didn’t, did you?”

Scott adjusted his butt yet again. The torture was deliberate and would apparently not be ending any time soon. Stiles sighed. That seemed completely fair somehow. 

As though making the decision for both of them, a seat belt snaked out of one side of the chair and connected to the other side with a mechanical click. The belt tightened over them, pulling Scott even more firmly into Stiles’ lap.

He tried really hard not to think about how his half-chubb was now nestled neatly in the cleft of Scott’s ample, supernaturally warm, pajama-clad ass.

Roscoe’s voice filtered into the cockpit through hidden speakers. “Are you two settled?

“As settled as we’re gonna be,” Scott replied. He sounded calm, but Stiles knew him well enough to tell he was far from okay. Their position was a little awkward, but Stiles still managed to take hold of Scott’s hand. He was relieved when Scott interlaced their fingers and held on for dear life.

The lights dimmed in the cabin, and the sound of something charging up resonated all around them.

Just before lift off, Stiles had to ask. “Scott, what exactly did you do to Roscoe’s clutch?”

Scott sighed. “Nothing, I swear...”

[randombubblegum]

ok so i remember awhile ago on... another blog ... there was a discussion of awtto drawing / writing on each other. i was like whatever, its just drawing on each other, moving on. anyway. one of my friends was over and she drew a skeleton wearing a hat on my arm and i know thats not even slightly the content of the awtto writing drawing BUT it has Awakened feelings in me so guess i misjudged the homoerotic power of scribbling on your friends. gay rights i suppose

OH HELL YEAH DUDE THATS SO CUTE theres something about it!!!! its the surprisingly sensitive feeling of a pen on ur skin u know? like when u do it urself it doesnt feel like anything but when someone else does it it makes ur heart beat or something. also thanks for reminding me about awtto drawing on each other because that is so choice

[shippindales]

we ain’t ever getting older

HAPPY STACKSON WEEK 2020 Y’ALL I WAITED UNTIL MIDNIGHT.

This is a gift fic for @jacksonstilinskis that was born out of a post from forever ago where she said Closer was definitely a Stackson song and I said oh I’d definitely write that and then LITERALLY FOUR YEARS PASSED and here we are finally making good on that in time for @stacksonweek !

Also I realize my blog is not very friendly on the eyes (I need a revamp) so try the read more but if not I included a link as well.

Enjoy!

AO3

It was the kind of atmosphere that Stiles liked, when he needed to unwind for a bit. It wasn’t a sleazy hole in the wall type of place, nor was it too ritzy or stuffy for his tastes. Ease in the air, good ambiance with the dim lighting and low music, bartenders who got down to business and knew when you didn’t need a conversation, and a decent crowd. Not too bad, all things considered, for a hotel bar.

He nursed his gin and tonic as he pulled lightly at his tie, loosening it enough until it dangled from his neck freely while he unbuttoned the top two buttons of his shirt. Wearing a suit would never grow on him, regardless of how his partner insisted that it gave them stature and authority. Miller could blow it out his ass, being federal agents gave them all the stature and authority they needed. But damn, he’d kill for jeans and a t-shirt every once in awhile. He’d have to beg for an undercover op next. 

It was his fourth night at the hotel in Denver, and the stakeout was getting stale. Miller had insisted he take a night off, even called in a reserve agent just to take his spot so that he could blow off some steam. The night was young, and Stiles figured he had a multitude of options ahead of him for where his evening could go.

That was, until raucous laughter started up from the table across the other end of the sparsely populated bar, and Stiles rolled his eyes at the group of well-dressed men that sat around it, their chatter rolling over him until he looked a little more carefully, and caught a very familiar eye.

He nearly spat out his drink, and the glass clattered to the bar noisily in front of him, drawing the attention of the concerned bartender and a few patrons nearby. He waved them off, dabbing at the spill that had splashed onto the front of his shirt with a bar napkin, before he looked back over, and couldn’t make eye contact anymore. He flushed scarlet, embarrassed at the extra attention, and stared at the wall before tipping the glass to his lips and downing his drink in a few solid, full gulps. He signaled for another in answer to the bartender’s unspoken inquiry as she raised an eyebrow and motioned to his glass.

An hour went by in seemingly seconds as Stiles’ thoughts raced. It was obvious he didn’t want to reconnect, or he would’ve said something. Or maybe it was just the crowd he was with, and he didn’t want to draw attention to anything. What if he’d already left? Stiles couldn’t see the group of men clearly from where he was sitting, and a few of them had been in and out, though he was pretty sure he knew which one was him... he frowned. He’d lost sight of him. A dull ache started to form in his stomach that was unrelated to the buzz from his third drink.

“You know, all the ways I pictured we might run into each other, and this wasn’t one of them,” the smooth voice purred in his ear, and Stiles sat bolt upright, spinning around to face him. Jackson fucking Whittemore, in all his three-piece suited glory, grinning like the cat that ate the canary.

Stiles froze for a moment, his mouth hanging open, before Jackson’s words sunk in. He looked across the restaurant and noticed that the remainder of Jackson’s table of companions was filtering out the door, and he turned back with a sly smirk on his face. “Too shy to introduce me to your fancy buddies over there? What are you guys anyway, stock brokers?” He raised an eyebrow, looking Jackson up and down.

Jackson didn’t miss the roving eyes, though his shirt was still buttoned up tight and his tie in place, unlike Stiles. He looked the other man up and down himself, before taking a swig of his beer. “We should maybe reintroduce ourselves, considering it’s been awhile. Jackson Whittemore, Esquire.” He held out a hand to shake, a proud smile on his face that put butterflies in Stiles’ stomach.

He gripped it tightly and shook, growing goosebumps on his arm in the process, before pulling out his badge and flipping it open. “Agent Stilinski. FBI.” Jackson’s eyes widened in surprise, and Stiles smirked. “Yeah, I know, I was the hot gossip at our five-year reunion. Which you missed, by the way.” He pointed accusingly at Jackson, his finger poking him in the chest. Jackson didn’t shy away from the contact, leaning over the bar next to Stiles and resting his drink on a coaster.

“Yeah, I missed it. Law school beat the shit out of me. I don’t know why I ever decided to follow in my dad’s footsteps.” He shrugged. “But it’s been a pretty good life so far. And uh, the academy’s done good things for you.” He raised an eyebrow, admiring the way Stiles’ form had filled out since high school. And Stiles knew, he’d definitely grown into the gangly limbs and awkward proportions since he was a teenager.

Not that it hadn’t been a struggle. He’d spent his first few weeks at the academy feeling like he was going to die, but the physical training had gradually honed him into a toned, lean version of himself that he never thought he’d see in his younger years. Regardless, Jackson’s obvious attention to it had him flushing slightly.

The unspoken tension filled the air before Stiles took a deep sip of his drink, setting it down carefully. “You never kept in touch,” he pointed out. It was casual, but his tone implied something deeper. Jackson stared at him, noticed the way Stiles’ eyes wouldn’t meet his gaze.

“Didn’t deserve to,” he retorted, which drew a look of surprise from Stiles. “What? I was an absolute ass in high school, dude. And probably even more of an ass in undergrad.” He shuddered. “I’ve grown up a lot. Obviously you have too. But I wanted to be... different, when I eventually got around to reconnecting with everyone, especially you.”

Especially you. And weren’t those pretty words to come from an equally pretty mouth. “Yeah, you were an ass in high school,” Stiles acknowledged, though the response from Jackson was a look of more guilt than he’d been intending to inflict. “But you made up for it.”

The implication turned back time to groping hands, shuttered up in Jackson’s bathroom during a party, mouths and limbs and hardness, heat and release— The blush was equal in both their cheeks. It wasn’t a single occurrence, they had quite the history over the last few years of high school.

“I remember,” Jackson muttered, the barest hint of a smile playing on the edges of his lips. “I didn’t know what I was doing then, though. And I was a dick to you about it. You know, when things got more... involved.”

When feelings got involved. Right.

Stiles shrugged it off. Long since passed, and long since forgotten. His attention instead turned to the earlier part of what Jackson had said. “So you know what you’re doing now?” he inquired, and his amber eyes were peering up at Jackson through those thick lashes that always set him off when they were younger, and god damn were those memories coursing through their veins and making them both feel alive, thrumming to the accelerating tattoo that their pulses set.

Jackson gripped Stiles’ tie, pulling him forward forcefully to capture his lips, ignoring the wandering eyes from the bartender and other patrons, who probably thought they were moving a little fast for a first time meet. He felt Stiles gasp quietly underneath him, the heat pooling in his gut as Stiles’ tongue flicked out gently to trace his bottom lip. They separated, breathing heavily, before Jackson pulled him by his tie a little further, to lean over in Stiles’ ear once more. “Want to find out?”

Stiles dug into his wallet, slapped a fifty on the counter and downed the rest of his drink. “Let’s get out of here,” he murmured, and Jackson followed him out the door before pressing him against the brick wall, humming into his mouth as their tongues danced. “Easy, tiger,” Stiles chided gently, grinning as Jackson nipped down the side of his jaw to his neck.

“Got a lot to make up for,” Jackson muttered against his skin, sucking a deep bruise into Stiles’ collarbone as he shoved the offending fabric of his dress shirt aside. His hand slipped into his pocket and came back with his car keys, clicking the remote. A black Range Rover beeped from the isolated corner of the parking lot, and Stiles looked before rolling his eyes.

“The Rover doesn’t surprise me, Mr. Porsche,” he teased, laughing as he danced away from Jackson’s needy hands and lips, making for the rear passenger side door. “Esquire over here flashing what he can afford.” There was no venom in his words, only joking praise.

“Why are you getting in the back?” Jackson asked, confusion knitting his brows.

“Because so are you,” Stiles retorted, and the mischievous grin spread across his face as he opened the door and hopped in. The grin that brought the memories surging back as Jackson hopped in the backseat from the other side, their mouths clashing urgently as Stiles tugged on Jackson’s jacket, discarding it into the front seat with little regard.

It wasn’t long until their shirts were open, and Jackson was pressing their chests flush together, relishing in the keen that came out of Stiles at the feel of skin on skin. He nipped down Stiles’ neck to drag his tongue along his clavicle, biting down sharply.

Stiles yelped, but felt himself stiffen completely, because yes, this was what he missed. The way Jackson never treated him like he was breakable, trusted him to handle it, and it was something he’d been missing for a long time. He didn’t get around much with his busy life and his federal job, and he felt like a tightly coiled spring finally given the freedom to release.

The way Jackson grabbed his hips bruisingly, like Stiles’d fall through to the center of the earth if he loosened his grip, lit something in him, and he pushed Jackson’s shirt off his shoulder, admiring the tribal tattoo design he found there. He sank his teeth into it, satisfied with the way Jackson threw his head back and moaned at the contact.

“Stiles,” he interrupted, but Stiles paid no mind, kissing his way down Jackson’s hairless chest as he pawed at his hardness through the front of his suit pants. “As much as I’d love to fuck you in my backseat, I think we need a bed.”

Stiles came up for air, after kissing down Jackson’s abdomen. He shrugged his shoulders, nipping at Jackson’s lower lip lightly. “Fine then, Whittemore. Take me home and take me to bed.”

The door slammed behind them minutes later, after Jackson had broken nearly every traffic law in the state. He yanked at Stiles’ shirt impatiently, pulling it off of his arms before their mouths were back in contact, shrugging off his own shirt as their clothing fluttered, forgotten, to the floor. Searing heat and the clash of rushed, hurried teeth filled Stiles’ consciousness, as Jackson’s hands roamed down his sides and slipped underneath his waistband, palming Stiles’ ass impatiently.

“Fucker,” Stiles growled into his mouth as he arched his back into the touch. Jackson reached down and grabbed him around the waist, hauling him up until Stiles’ legs wrapped around his waist instinctively. He threw the other man unceremoniously on the bed after shoving into the bedroom, and Stiles collapsed in a pile of limbs before turning onto his back, sighing gently. “Your mattress is comfy,” he complimented, a stupid grin slapped across his face as he shimmied out of his pants.

“My law school roommate in Boulder ditched the last month of rent. I changed the locks and stole his furniture.” Jackson’s belt whipped off lightning quick as he shoved his own pants and underwear to the floor, his cock springing free of its cloth prison. He hissed as it met the cool air, and Stiles licked his lips as they collapsed back together, hands and mouths fumbling deliciously.

After a few moments, Stiles scrambled down the bed to swallow him to the hilt in one fluid motion. Jackson hissed as Stiles’ tongue flicked out around the base of his shaft as he took him into the back of his throat. “Jesus fuck, your mouth, Stilinski. Missed it so much.”

Stiles pulled up and off of Jackson’s shaft with a wet pop, before smacking it lightly against his cheek. “Guess you’ll just have to make up for lost time then.” He ran his tongue from base to tip, swirling it around the head before delving back down, and Jackson pulled his own hair to keep from yelling to loudly at how fucking incredible it felt.

Stiles hummed around his shaft, bobbing to the base and back to the tip to swirl his tongue in the way he knew drove Jackson nuts. The humming sent deep vibrations through Jackson’s flesh and he let out a ragged, broken moan.

The taste and feel of him bombarded Stiles with memories of the first time he’d ever sucked Jackson’s dick, denial radiating through the other boy even as he’d twitched in anticipation, letting out a rough breath as Stiles finally took him in his mouth.

“Do you like it?”

“Shut up and keep going.”

Jackson was growing impatient, and he finally pulled himself out of Stiles’ mouth, reaching down to throw the other man further up on the bed, stomach down, receiving a yelp of protest which quickly died on Stiles’ lips as Jackson kissed down his back to his ass, biting sharply into his left cheek. His breath ghosted over Stiles’ hole, and okay, yes, this was a thing that they’d never done together before that Stiles was 120% on board with.

“Are you seriously going to ahhhhh fucking shit Christ Jesus,” Stiles babbled as Jackson’s tongue flicked out and laved at his rim like a man starved, both hands palming Stiles’ ass and spreading his cheeks and yeah, okay, Jackson had picked up some tricks since high school. Yup.

His sensitive hole was twitching under the ministrations of Jackson’s tongue, and Jackson hummed as he pressed his tongue inside the taut ring of muscle, eliciting a sharp sound from Stiles that he wanted more of. A finger joined his tongue, then two as Stiles relaxed under his efforts.

“God, I can’t believe I’ve never opened you up like this before,” Jackson panted. “You’re so warm and open, so good for me.” His praise was radiating through Stiles’ bones as he pressed his hips back.

“I need you,” Stiles groaned. “Need to feel you again. It’s been— god, too long, not enough, just— just do it.”

Jackson nodded, moving to obey and flicking open the bottle of lube he’d nabbed from his bedside table, spreading it over himself quickly before pressing into Stiles, slowly but persistently.

Stiles’ eyes screwed tight as he breathed in and out sharply, the burn of Jackson’s breach stretching him in a way he hadn’t been in a long time. “Fucking holy hell, forgot how thick you were,” he breathed, pressing his face into the pillow desperately as he rolled his hips back to take Jackson further.

Jackson paused, for a brief moment, to give Stiles time to adjust. That action alone sent a shock through Stiles’ body. Jackson had never been about how Stiles felt, their clandestine hookups throughout high school had always been about Jackson getting off, but this— this was different, and Stiles felt it, felt the consideration and respect.

He responded by pressing his hips back into Jackson, hissing as the burn reignited but slowly began to dissipate. “Move,” he commanded, and Jackson obeyed.

And this, this was what Jackson had missed the most. “God, the way you look spread out around my dick,” he groaned, fucking into Stiles with earnest, staring down at the way Stiles’ hole gripped his girth each time he slid out.

“Shit, Jacks,” Stiles grunted, slamming his hips backwards to meet Jackson’s thrusts, all earlier thoughts of tenderness abandoned. “God, I forgot how good you felt in me. It’s been so long. Always so fucking hard and rough with me. Fuck.”

Jackson’s hand cracked down onto Stiles’ ass, drawing a yelp and leaving an angry red handprint. He spanked him again, twice more, three more times, causing Stiles to let out a long, sharp series of moans. “Fucking take it,” Jackson bit out, pummeling into him rapidly.

Stiles’ talk devolved into senseless syllables and nonsensical babbling as he felt the pleasure coiling in his gut. “Mmmm, f-f-fuuuuck, I’m gonna— I’m close, I—”

Jackson halted, reaching down with both arms and flipping Stiles over onto his back in one smooth motion, bending his head to bite roughly on Stiles’ bottom lip as he pushed back in, holding him around his waist with his legs in the air as he jackhammered in at a punishing pace. “Want to see it,” he panted against Stiles’ lips. “Want to see you let go, see how taken apart you are when you come.”

Stiles came with a shout, spurting copiously all over his chest, his eyes screwed shut and fists tangled in the sheets. Jackson followed him over the brink, moaning loudly as he shoved to the hilt and spilled himself inside Stiles.

Collapsing on the bed next to him, they both laid for a few moments, Stiles’ head lolling over onto Jackson’s shoulder. Their breathing was still heavy, though their pulses began to slow after having finally reached their peaks.

“So,” Jackson began, running his finger through the mess on Stiles’ abdomen and popping it into his mouth before pulling it out with a pop. Stiles’ eyes followed him, blown wide and dark. “Made up for lost time?”

Stiles nodded, grinning wildly as he ran his fingers through his sweat-dampened hair. “It’s a start.”

A start. Jackson nodded, breaking eye contact as a smile spread across his face.

----------------------------------------

He traced his fingertips around Jackson’s abdominal muscles absentmindedly, leaning his head into the crook of the other man’s neck. Jackson’s eyes were lightly closed, satisfied after their round the next morning. They were resting quietly, the morning light filtering in through the taupe curtains and spilling warm rays of sunshine across their mostly still forms.

“Would things have been different?” Stiles asked quietly, prompting a soft, questioning hum from Jackson, who kept his eyes closed, but rubbed circles into Stiles’ shoulder with his thumb. “If you weren’t a dick in high school, I mean.” The implication behind it left Stiles feeling vulnerable, and he swallowed it down thickly.

“Maybe,” Jackson admitted, turning to press his lips gently into Stiles’ hair. “I can’t change who I was then. I wish it could’ve gone differently, though.” The unspoken differences echoed in the silence, and Stiles pictured what life could’ve been like, in another world.

“What about now?” he asked, voice uncertain. There was no indication that Jackson had wanted this to continue, that it was more than just a rekindling of an old flame, destined to wither and snuff out as it had before.

Jackson was silent for a moment too long before responding, and it twisted Stiles’ stomach up in knots. “What about it?”

“Is it too late?” Stiles asked. He was unable to form the words, unable to ask directly for fear of putting himself too far out there. Something about this just felt like the universe was pointing them in the right direction for once, and he needed to know now if it was never going to happen.

“Do you want it to be?” Jackson asked.

He blinked, the answer clear as day. “No.”

A small smile played at the corner of Jackson’s lips as he looked down at Stiles. “Then it’s not too late.”

The sun’s rays splayed out gently across their skin as Jackson pulled him closer.

“Good.”

[descendantofthesparrow]

Harry Hook x pan! reader Oneshot - quartermaster?

requested by @lowkeyaesthvtic

May I have a request where the reader is the daughter of Peter Pan (the OUAT one that was a villain) and she wants to get closer to Harry (they’re already dating) but can’t do that unless she convinces Uma to be a second “first mate?” Harry could help too if you want.

the daughter of peter pan, that’s who you were, known to be the daughter of one of the evilest villains in history, and when Auradon had been created, beast, aka Rumplestiltskin, and belle, who looked awfully similar to the blue fairy for some reason. Had banished Pan to the isle of the lost, along with many other villains, including the once pirate villain “captain hook”, forcing him to leave his wife and his children were forced to follow him.

The people of Auradon forced rumples hand and he regrettably sent Killian, Hope, Harrison, and Calista Jane to the isle, the youngest only a couple months old.

“We can't have the children of villains here, they'll kill us all!!” the people of Auradon cried

Fools, rumple was a villain once upon a time and they seemed to have conveniently forgotten that.

Though now he called himself Adam and cast a permanent illusion that made him look different.

So now you sat in the caves near the crocodile shores, leaning against a midsized croc, named Gorvan, the spawn of tick-tock. (for some reason the crocs from the Disney version of peter pan were also on the isle, no one really cared, they were mostly chill unless you purposely aggravated them)

Waiting for your boyfriend Harry Hook.

Now you might be thinking

‘hey? Aren’t pan and hook enemies?’ and you would be correct, Captain Hook and Peter Pan were enemies, but Hook had killed Pan only a couple of months after arriving at the isle, as the demon-like boys magic no longer existed, so he died from his wounds, and the barrier, which prevented death (unless from old age), had not cared to resurrect pan.

so your mother, who was eight months pregnant with you, asked Killian to not hold the fact of who your parent was over your head, and he had agreed, never referring to you as pans daughter, but your own annoying but tolerable person.

A person that loved his son, he had been slightly weirded out when he discovered your relationship with harry, before shrugging, he had no room to talk, he married the daughter of snow white and prince charming.

“lassie?! You in here?!” Gorvan popped his head up, recognizing Harry's voice, and stood, making you fall back when your pillow left and trotted to where Harry was standing at the entrance, too afraid to enter the den of the crocs.

“nonononon stay away!!! You beast get back!!! (y/n)!!” you sighed and stood, going to where you heard Harry's panicked babbling.

“really harry?” you groaned, patting the scaly head of the teen croc, gorvan seemed to snicker and trotted into a corner, giving harry space to climb down from a tree just outside the cave entrance.

“You can come down now, he's in the corner”

“but he's still watching” Harry whined, tightly clutching to the heavy branch he was on.

You sighed, nodding at your shadow, who nodded back, walking over to where Harry's shadow was being cast and picked it up, making harry float up from the branch, he yelped, wriggling around.

“h-hey! Do yeh have teh do this every time?!” he screeched, your shadow dropping his next to you, making harry plop down on his butt at your feet.

“well if you actually came down I wouldn’t have to” you smiled down at him, he grumbled standing up, wiping the back of his jacket, dust falling.

“whatever” he crossed his arms pouting at you. “so hooky” you cooed, still grinning, stepping closer to the pirate. “got any new plans to help me get into the crew?’

Harry sighed “no, uma is adamant on not letting yeh on the crew, even as a low-level member.”

“ugg” you groaned, whyyyy? Harry's place as the first mate prevented the two of you from bonding more, as boyfriend and girlfriend at least, you two had grown up together, knowing almost everything about each other, but still umas crew took a lot of Harrys time, and you understood! You had the lost kids to worry over, a lot of which had asked a while ago to join uma nad you let them, uma was an amazing leader, you weren’t really thinking of the fact that they preferred her over you, you were more worried over their protection.

And plus they still bunkered down at the campout a lot so it's not like they completely abandoned you.

“do you know why?” you asked, messing with the thin material of Harry's sleeveless hoodie. Harry sighed nodding.

“aye, she finally gave meh the reason, instead of just ransom reasons”

You peered at Harry, raising your brow “oh, do tell”

“she thinks that if yeh join we would distract each other from our duties, shed rather our relationship be a factor in the crew”

You rolled your eyes “seriously! Im like the best at separating relationships from work! You know that! She should know that!”

Harry nodded, he had seen your ability to do that himself. awhile ago mad Maddy, who had been one of your best friends at the time, had stolen and hurt Fiona, Felix's daughter, and you had separated the relationship you had with her and gone after her, forgoing your relationship with her to do your duty as leader of the lost kids.

You had told her it was nothing personal, but she didn’t care. and after the split of the vks after the shrimpy incident, the two of you split, you siding with uma, while Maddy sided with mal.

You sighed, you couldn’t force uma to let you onto the crew, she was captain, it was up to her.

“fine” you mumbled, letting your weight go and bumping your forehead onto Harry's torso/shoulder, pouting into his skin “whatever”

Harry sighed, wrapping his arms around you, “don’t worry lass, we’ll figure this out”

You nodded, rubbing your face into his jacket.

----

Uma sighed, one of her newer members was an absolute idiot, stealing from pan. Her and (y/n) had an agreement, you don’t bother me I won't bother you, and the new idiot, kyle, son of Hans, wanted to prove himself, choosing to steal something important from pan.

A small bottle, filled with dust, pixie dust, now kyle didn’t know what he stole, he just found the bottle in a locked box, thought It was something her mother or peter gave (y/n) before dying and stole it. Thinking it would get him points with uma.

It didn’t.

Uma paced the deck, harry front and center, she hoped that Harry's relationship with (y/n) would convince her to back down, and simply ask for the dust back.

Oh, boy was she wrong.

(y/n) had arrived, three lost kids for each pirate crew member, glaring them down.

“uma” you called, flipping your blade in your hand, drifting your eyes over umas crew, locking eyes with harry for a moment, who gestured to kyle. “I believe you have something of mine, I want it back”

Uma was willing to back down, but her crew yelled out in protest, and she sighed, well, can't disappoint the crew, that would also ruin her reputation, she drew her sword, staring into the girls (e/c) eyes.

“then take it”

The sound of pirates and lost kids clashing sounded across the cove, you started toward uma, leader vs leader.

Harry hopped in front of her, grinning at you, hand on his sword and hook pointed at you.

“Hello love” you smirked, cocking your hip.

“hey hooky”

“would yeh mind stepping down, for meh~?” he gave you that grin, the one that usually could melt you into a puddle.

Not today, you had a mission. A duty.

“Sorry dude” you raced forward, taking advantage of him not drawing his sword, stealing his hook, tripping him, and rolling him off your back and into the shallows.

“duty calls”

Uma stood surprised, she thought that a simple wink from harry would make you back down, not wanting to hurt him due to your relationship.

But you straight up just dunked harry into the water.

Umas sword clashed with yours, and you fought, a fast-paced dance between blades and uma somehow got the upper hand, flinging your sword away and knocking you back.

You fell with a grunt, seeing a certain someone behind uma. You got out your crossbow, opening the bolt bag at your side, and loading it.

You looked up, seeing Fiona pushing uma down, her larger stature easily overpowering ume.

You aimed the crossbow, the shot lining with umas ribs.

“(y/n)! don’t!” you heard harry scream, obviously thinking you were about to shoot uma, but you ignored him, Fiona shoved uma to the floor and pinned her.

You took the shoot.

The blot flew thought the air soaring past where uma stood only a moment ago, landing in kyles arm, he screamed in pain, releasing his sword, kneeling down and clutching his arm.

“AHHH!!!!” you stood, closing the bows of the crossbow and swinging it to lay on your back, stepping over umas arm and kneeling next to kyle, face blank.

“ill have that bottle you took”

Kyle nodded, tears and snot running down his face, digging into his jacket pocket and bringing out the small bottle of dust and fumbling to hand it to you.

“good boy” you muttered, taking the bottle and ripping the bolt from his arm, kyle crying out in pain again.

You stood, walking over to uma, and shoving Fiona off of her “sorry uma, but this stuff is not to leave my person, your crew member violated our agreement as well” uma took your hand, letting you pull her up.

“I know I know” she sighed, picking up her hat from the floor glaring down at Kyle, who was still whimpering on the floor, “I tell every single crew member to leave your territory alone, and this idiot steals” she gestures to the bottle “that”

You laughed, your lost kids now backing off from the crew, talking to the ex lost kids now on the crew. If their leaders got along, no reason to fight.

“yeah, so see ya later cap’n” you saluted to her, turning and walking off the ship, waggling your fingers at harry, who winked back.

“ see ya later hooky, sorry bout dunking ya!”

“at least there were no crocs” he yelled back with a smile, seeing you laugh, walking off with your lost kids to head to the hideout.

Harry sighed, staring after you, he wants to follow, but uma probably needed him here.

Uma walked up, seeing Harry's look.

“so harry?” she started, waiting for Harry to look at her “do you think (y/n) still wants to join?”

Harry's jaw dropped, “wha? But I thought ye said-“

“I know what I said, now tell (y/n) that the position for quartermaster is open”

“quartermaster?” Harry repeated, confused.

“yes quartermaster, now go get her! And tell the lost kids they are welcome to join”

harry grinned, nodding and racing off the ship, calling your name.

---the end---

[sadsentinel]

i wld trade a kidney for literally any elliott/leah content my dude

hi anon! sorry it took me so long to get this written out. i hope you like it! also, you can keep your kidneys, i’ll settle for a like :)

btw, i’ve started a story on wattpad that will contain all the stardew oneshots i write. you can find it here!

The late afternoon sky glowed orange through Leah's window. Have I really been working that long?  She'd noticed only once that the light peeking through her curtains had begun to change, but that had been... she wasn't quite sure how long ago that had been.

Her stomach grumbled and she realized she hadn't eaten since breakfast. After the new farmer had moved to town and convinced her to host an art show, she'd been working even harder on her sculptures. There had been many a day since then that she had forgotten to take breaks, even to eat, she was so focused on her sculpting.

She smiled to herself as she looked over her current work-in-progress. This one would have to wait until tomorrow morning, unless a bout of inspiration struck her as she tried to sleep that night. That had been happening now more than ever, and she was glad. She relished in the fact that moving here had been the right decision. After all of the good things that had happened to her here in Pelican Town, she couldn't imagine living any other way, or anywhere else.

She'd made true friends, gained the courage to share her art, and best of all, she was happy.

A muffled cough, barely audible above the babbling stream outside, pulled her attention away from her thoughts. Who could that be? She prepared herself to go meet whoever it was, but first ran her fingers over her work, a little surprised at how well it was turning out. She'd expected this design to be much harder than she had originally anticipated. She quickly recoiled when she drew her finger over what felt like a massive splinter.

"Ow!" She shook her hand as if to dull the pain, and gingerly picked the splinter out. Her lips formed a hard line as she did, and her finger radiated pain with each heartbeat. She pulled a pale sheet over her sculpture and kicked a few of the larger wood shavings out of the walkway. That's enough for today.

She slipped into her boots and emerged from her home for the first time that day. The warm, summer sunlight washed over her, and she shut her eyes for a moment, just to take in the comforting feeling of it. Something about life in the country made her appreciate the small things, like enjoying the sunshine. That was something she'd never been able to do in the city. There was too much hustle and bustle, and it was too loud to hear the quiet, calming sounds of nature.

"Elliott? Is that you?"  She held her hand over her eyes to block the sun, and peered out at the figure sitting by the edge of the water. The man turned and smiled.

"Leah! It's good to see you. Why don't you join me?" He patted the spot beside him, and she walked over to accompany him. "How have you been? I haven't seen much of you lately."

It was true; she'd become somewhat of a recluse. The inspiration she'd felt lately had occupied her entire day, for weeks now.

"Yeah, sorry. I've been distracted, I suppose." She leaned back and placed her hands on the ground for support, but flinched when a stab of pain coursed through her finger. "Ouch." She lifted her hand and shook it out once again, until the pain became but a dull sensation.

"What happened?" Elliott's voice dripped with concern for his friend. He extended his hand, genuine worry causing his eyebrows to knit together. She placed her hand in his and he turned it over, inspecting it for injury.

"Just a big splinter. It'll heal." She waved his worry away with her free hand, but his concern didn't fade like she'd hoped it would.

"You should be careful," he said, pulling something from his pocket. Leah realized it was a bandage as he began wrapping it around her finger, as gentle as if he were cradling a baby bird. Elliott had always been gentle and caring, and despite their slight age difference, she was drawn to him. He'd been kind to her since the day they'd met, when he wandered into the Saloon looking to meet everyone.

"Hi, I'm Leah." She smiled at him, feeling a nervous blush spread across her cheeks.

"Elliott. It's a pleasure to meet you," he responded, shaking her hand gently, but firmly. "Oh! Your hands—" He'd noticed the roughness of her skin that came from hours of sculpting. She glanced down at her calloused, work-hardened hands.

"Oh, I'm a sculptor. Wood carving." She felt herself smile again, albeit involuntarily, as the embarrassment flushed her cheeks.

"Really!" he exclaimed. "I'm an artist myself. A writer," he said. "Art really does come in many forms, doesn't it?"

"I suppose you're right. It does." Leah grinned widely, genuinely happy there was another artist in town. She'd always been afraid of sharing her art, but maybe he could help her overcome that fear. If not, at least she had one person she could potentially bond over the craft with.

The pair talked long into the night, until Gus called over to them from behind the bar, "It's almost closin' time, folks." Emily yawned in the corner as she washed down a few tables.

Leah glanced around, and realized they were the only ones left. Everyone else had already headed home for the night.

"Oh! We should really get home, it's getting awful late." She rarely stayed out so long into the night, but this was an exception. She'd made a new close friend, and they had so much in common. She could only hope they would remain friends for a long time to come.

They didn't go straight home that night, though. Elliott had asked if she wanted to go to the beach for awhile, and although her limbs felt heavy with exhaustion, she found herself agreeing. They'd talked for several more hours, about their pasts, about art, about Pelican Town, about everything. They only realized how late it was getting, or early rather, when the sun began to shine on the horizon. The colors of the sky changed from a deep, purplish-blue, to a beautiful shade of lavender, until the paler blues, yellows, and hazy orange glow filled the still star-speckled sky.

"Is that better?" he asked, still holding her hand with a kind of softness only he was capable of. She nodded, appreciative of his care.

"Thanks."

A soft breeze blew a few scattered leaves over the sparkling water that flowed peacefully beneath them. The orange haze of the sunset reflected back on them, and filled the air with an otherworldly glow you could only ever experience here.

"I'm glad I met you," Leah said. She tossed her bright red hair over her shoulder and smiled at her friend.

"So am I. The town is beautiful, the wilderness simply beckons for you with its peaceful, calming aura, and the soft crashing of the waves makes the beach the perfect place to call home. And the people. The people are kind and warm-hearted." He winked at her, and the corners of her lips turned upwards in a smile.

"It's so nice to have another artist in town, y'know. You really get me." Elliott smiled at the compliment and chuckled.

"Good. I had planned on sticking around for a long time."

[twilightvolt]

Twilight Thoughts (BEASTARS Episodes 1-4 Part II)

WARNING: SPOILERS IMMINENT FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO’RE DECIDING TO WAIT FOR NETFLIX TO RELEASE THE SHOW FROM PRISON. But hey, if you don’t mind, then let’s get this show on the road!

Episode 3: Inner Thoughts and Personal Secrets

Now THIS is the episode where I really felt invested in the characters. Like, there’s so many tidbits of info that I found that made me question a LOT about certain characters.

- Legoshi stopping Haru by putting a blanket over her saying that she’ll catch a cold and get bitten by the insects, while also nervously bolting out of there and slamming the door on his tail was so adorkable and gOD I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS BOI IS SO P U R E . Ngl I kinda was the same way in high school not long ago. Hell, his overall character so far is basically me in high school. And it’s crazy how much I can resonate with him, wolf problems aside.

- I think next they explained what the drama club was all about and how the auditions go. This actually gave me a huge amount of questions to consider. Like, Louis is the “perfect” leader, so of course he has something he’s hiding. But Legoshi just seemed so….normal. and they said they only accept people with unusual backgrounds. So….what’s Legoshi hiding?

- And speaking of Legoshi, I did notice he was much bigger than most of the wolves that went to the school. And the following scenes told me more things about him that went quick, but I saw it with the right fansubs considering others didn’t translate it well.

1. He says he cuts his nails, but the very next day they grow back like nothing happened? I was like “Iiiiiii don’t think wolf claws grow back that quickly.” I mean unless you’re a werewolf, but I don’t think were anything is possible in this universe.

2. It’s the first time someone treated him the way Haru just did earlier. So I guess he doesn’t know about intercourse? Or like, he does, but no one’s ever….come onto him like that? This one I might be reading wrong.

3. He notices just then that he’s happy. It makes me think he’s not used to feeling that emotion which makes me concerned.

They haven’t gone into his past at all these past 3 episodes. So literally everything about him before his second year of high school is a total mystery. Heheh, it makes me so excited to hopefully learn more in the later parts of the season.

- That scene between Louis and Legoshi was also super intriguing. As Legoshi talks to him with his hand gestures (Also something I do. Lol), it looks like he’s studying his movements. Idk why, but I guess maybe he’s watching his hands cuz his claws are uncut? like, he’s sensing the danger levels?

- He pushes him to try and bite him (Yeah, I know.) But as his fangs are coming down, I notice there’s a reflection coming off of them. So I’m not sure if Louis’ expression changes because of his herbivorous instincts kicking in to let go of him or because he sees himself and is reminded that he is in fact an herbivore and shouldn’t be doing this cuz he could get hurt. He’s also jealous that he can keep his carnivorous tendencies so suppressed apparently. So maybe all of this is just him feeling frustrated that he’s not doing what he was born to do?

- This episode’s ED i think is my favorite so far. it focuses on Legoshi’s internal struggles with his instincts. the song i think i like more than Le Zoo, the first ED, but the visuals really nail the thoughts going on in his head. or maybe this is just my inner edgelord coming through. lmao

Episode 4: Real Idiot Hours

Ok, this one was certainly the craziest one so far. I’m still reeling and i feel like this episode was not only super emotional, but also it went so damn fast that i barely could think about what was going on. Lmao

- Now, my initial thoughts about Bill were “Oh, is he gonna be the big lovable idiot? D'aww, look at him quoting Louis. He’s such a dork!”

- Legoshi still being adorable cuz he has to be on stage, but he doesn’t want to so he hides behind the board. ;w;

- He’s been in this club for 4 years? Huh….and this whole time, he was able to get by like this. As an introvert. Guess things can change pretty suddenly.

- Then my opinions on Bill quickly changed when he decides to go all out against Legoshi in their rehearsals. I was like “Hold up dude! Calm the frick down with that stick!” But then realized it was cuz they were both carnivores, so he must think he doesn’t have to hold anything back. Which I guess is understandable.

- But then he’s talking with Louis later and it just feels like his personality is so….flip floppy. Like, one minute he’s all “Hey buddy! Let’s do our best!” and the next he’s seriously hurting my boi! Oh, don’t get me started on that scene. We’ll get to that.

- Legoshi sniffs him and finds out he has a bottle of bunny blood in his pocket. I was like “Oh….O h  n o . O_O’” then he says, while it’s not from a student, it was from an upperclassman….but Haru’s an upperclassman, so Legoshi gets super pissed. Understandable, but I’m sure it’s a misunderstanding.

- He says he can’t say anything since he drew blood from her too, so I was like “Why not tho? It’s not like you killed her.” But then I realized maybe telling him he drew blood in the first place would be bad, so I guess there’s that.

- Anyone else think the blood thing was a parallel to drugs?

And now we get to the second night of the play. Oh boi….w o w .

- Watching Legoshi just…..snap and start beating the crud out of Bill on stage hurt my heart. It was also a stupid move on his part, but the emotions must’ve driven him more than his rational thoughts. He did look really badass in that getup tho.

- His screaming when he really started getting into the beatdown hurt the most. Like, oh lord. You can really feel just how much he really cares about her deep down.

- Then Bill stops him and uhh…..dIGS HIS CLAWS INTO HIS BACK AND GIVES HIM A HUGE GASH. HE H U R T . MY B O I .

I do think Legoshi was overreacting. I do think he was taking it too far. But nOSEBLEEDS AND BLACK EYES CAN HEAL. SCARS CAN’T. YOU HURT HIM, YOU HURT ME, DAMMIT.

Though….after awhile of thinking about it….I remember that line he says as he’s getting scratched. That the blood that’s coming down is the same as Bill’s. A carnivore. Something that he’s trying so hard not to be. Maybe he was partly beating the hell out of him cuz of what he’s done, but also beating the hell out of himself in a way. If that makes any sense. Like, I can imagine that scene was basically him using his fists to yell at himself like “I’m not like you. I don’t wanna be like you. Shut up!”

- Louis saving him from getting even more scarred like “Oh not today, bish.” was SO badass. Quite a master at improv, I must say. he even just walked on stage without his crutches no problem. he was like “Broken leg? Hahahah, that’s cute.”

- Him giving Legoshi his hand and telling him that he’s right was interesting as well. It’s like he was saying “It’s ok. You can stop now. You did the right thing.” Like, as if he finally understands why Legoshi is who he is. this week’s ED sequence focuses on their relationship too btw.

- Also, I started bein’ like “Ooooh, he gon’ get it now.” Cuz he knew about the blood, so it looks like someone’s getting cut from the acting team in the next episode. :^)

In fact, this episode is probably gonna spawn multiple consequences for everyone involved. Bill of course cuz blood, but Legoshi might get seriously punished for what he did as well. Louis miiight get a stern talking to cuz he wasn’t supposed to be on stage, but that’ll probably be the extent of it. i mean y’all gotta remember they’re high schoolers here. i’m sure the school staff definitely won’t let this slide.

After all this, I’m still wondering why everyone wants to push Legoshi into being more carnivorous. I guess maybe it’s just something he has to learn to control rather than suppress completely? But like, why? It’s his choice to be who he wants, right? Why can’t he live in peace? but then again….this is a prime example of why he should learn. when he can’t control his emotions, he becomes extremely dangerous to not only himself, but the people around him. he could actually kill someone with his kind of strength if he’s not careful. someone smaller than Bill at least. maybe it’s not good to just push it down….

*Sigh* hoo boi, that was a lot. as you can see, this is quickly becoming one of my favorite anime. and it’s only been like, 4 episodes. if this is what it’s like NOW, i can only imagine what’s gonna happen in the rest of the season.

See you guys next week hopefully when i talk about episode 5 once that drops! ^  ^

[seenashwrite]

Notes From Nash: Season 15, Episode 3

It's ep three, and was third try the charm? Well, we're still in that little town, which is infuriating. But don't lose hope, chickadees. There was some character arc action and some plot advancing, and just drama in general, and it moved at a decently quick clip, all of which is refreshing after last week's ass-disaster of an episode. 

If I were grading this ep, all things considered (including some damn fine acting moments that elevated the material), it's an A-. (Five points were docked immediately because we were still in the little town.) But seriously, this week's writer(s) had a LOT to make up for given the aforementioned last week as well as a largely lackluster premiere, so you know what? Props to them. 

We got a loose end from season past tied up, got rid of some dead weight, and then there was a thing that happened that I’m not entirely sure was necessary at this interval, but I get why it happened. Of course, we had our requisite random hamfisted “solution(s)” and still-unexplained bits that should’ve been clarified ages ago, can’t not have those, it seems. Regardless, this episode was actually fairly interesting to watch. I’m still wary about the state of the season after the first two, but this one had some spark.

Spoilers below the cut, you know the drill.  

This one's in order, I was jotting stuff down as I watched. Past ep breakdowns linked at the bottom. If you’re new, hello, welcome, etc., I don’t do meta shit or reading into the symbolism of the color of a blurry wallpaper just over someone’s shoulder, I look at writing and cohesiveness and structure and flow and all that jazz. I basically just call things as I see ‘em. 

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More spooky-scary still seems to be pouring from the hellpit, but at least this crypt is pretty, and Harry Potter tent-esque because the square feet inside is seemingly bigger than the outside.  

Rowena appears to be outfitted in one of my grandmother's housedresses, or a coffin lining, or a 1980s prom dress, whichever you prefer, and none of them have been pressed. I'm trying to say I don't like it. They also continue to do Ruthie's makeup in such a manner that she perpetually looks approximately fifteen years older than she actually is, so in a way I'm thankful this is likely her last episode. On the other hand, I trust these writers and the people who assemble/green light the promos about as far as I can throw them, so we shall see. In any event, Ruthie is quite the good actor and I hope she gets a million gigs after all this is done.  

This Sam-Dean moment with Creased Brow Sam and Gruff Voice Dean is falling so flat, not because of them, but because we're hearing The Same Damn Thing We've Already Heard. Move the plot along, please----- Oh wait here comes Belphagor once again with a solution, this time a nice little plot rescue MacGuffin! Lilith's Crook. Just gotta blow it like a horn. 

Motherbitch, this is stupid.

I got a thought: make it Gabriel's horn, so it calls in all the angels who should've come back with the reverse-y switch-a-roo, and they deal with sealing the hole, but bonus! At end of ep last scene is that it's also called Gabriel back, too. I'd announce to the universe that this show needs to hire me, but, welp.

Oh look, Ketch is in a hospital gown. Oh look, I bet Ketch is about to die in that hospital gown, instead of a badass suit like it should be. It looked like DHJ accidentally spoiled via a tweet that I happened to see----- 

I dodge the promo images and articles and such so I can give a view of someone who doesn't know what is coming in these things. 

-----because he talked about coming back just to leave again, that it was a pleasure, whatever, and y'all will have to fill me in on that because I kinda can't believe he whiffed that hard. I'm not looking it up, is my point. Did he whiff? Actually, don't answer that, I don't care. I mean, don’t go to trouble looking into it on my account.  

Hmmm. Was Ketch’s death entirely necessary? At least, right now? I dunno. Maybe. I’m 50/50 whether this, or have him be double-crossy then get killed later. In any event, well-acted by DHJ. He's quite fantastic. He is wasted in all the Hallmark dreck he's been in, I really hope he gets some good work after this. That's that. Moving on. 

We're 1/4 in, and I'll give it this: we've gotten some action, some drama, but they've GOT to make up for the lack of plot progression in episode 2. Belphagor is shady as shit, which we knew, and this just got reinforced by that demon who has such a hard-on for Belphagor getting axed. 

I do not mind rando badass lady hunter having lines and playing a tangentially-important role in the ep, but this means if we ever see her again, she'll likely get killed, so I'm not getting attached. 

So hell is an angry vagina. SFX, are y'all okay? Is that prick whose tweets occasionally come across my feed still working there? Y'all need some hugs? I know y'all need some better budget, that all the DC shows got it, but oh well, that ship's sailed.  

Well done set dec, I dig the ghoulish statues in that hallway. And hey costume design, I like the ring that dude was wearing, I would wear that in real life. It would also look great as a wrist cuff. I digress. 

We know this demon is not going to succeed in killing Belphagor, so once more we have a pointless halftime cliffhanger. Also, have I mentioned I'm done with Cas being a weak puss? I'm telling you, if stuff got rewound, he should be incrementally getting his mojo back, that tracks logically. See Ep. 1 notes for what I thought should've happened for a legit "Whoa" moment. 

"Do you have any idea what he is?" --- he's a poop demon. Again, see the first episode of @youtotallymadethatup​    /shameless plug

[sighs]

Is this show gonna end with a Jack vs. Jack battle royale? Because fuck that noise. But! Writing-wise, it's okay that ol’ Belph may become the big bad. Nash, why would you say that, you ask. Easy.

IT WILL GET US THE FUCK OUT OF THIS LITTLE TOWN

A. Ny. Thing. to get us the fuck out of this little town. I am so goddamned bored.

Cas, this is a mistake. You should leave. What are you doing. Leave. Don't fall for that. Leave. Go now. Whoosh. Okay, or glow worm and barbeque the body. That was a nice little catch of emotion by Misha at the end. Except are the demons now gonna jump into his body? Better not, we've seen that season. 

Commercials! Cannot believe I've not been inundated with the adverts for the convention here in the spring, that's usually the jam. Imma go get some frozen yogurt. Highly rec strawberry with a little warmed-up Nutella. Try it, then tell me I'm crazy. I'm not. It's heavenly. 

Aaaaand, we're back!

Don't look so distressed Cas, y’all were gonna burn it anyway. But this takes Jack v. Jack off the table. Hopefully this means we'll be headed back to the Empty to get some progress on that hanging thread from last season sooner rather than later. Still, I'm glad we are down a character for awhile, this character in particular was starting to work my nerves and honestly, is just dead weight. I want it back to Sam and Dean for the most part this final season with sprinklings of Cas. Everyone else is secondary.

[claps] Very excellent Ruthie and Jared. One critique: Wish there could've been some sort of line from Rowena, re: "And perhaps I'll get to see my boy again", something of that ilk.

But I want to say this, and say it emphatically:

The nonsensical spells pulled from asses must stop

The soul-catcher thing is an example of a great move because it drew upon the past, then built upon for the present. This heart and angel blood and salt shit, and then this “Oh by the way it needs my dying breath” stuff is just obvious “um um um well how about bleh” writing stumbles, and it shows. The only reason that lameness worked? Ruthie and Jared’s performances. Period. Because y’all gave them absolute garbage to work with, and they made it shine.

Hey! There's the two convention promos with one short local ad in between, followed by the same local ad again! I was beginning to think they'd forgotten! 

WE ARE OUT OF THE LITTLE TOWN, I REPEAT, WE ARE OUT OF THE LITTLE TOWN 

DEAN IS IN A HENLEY, I REPEAT, DEAN IS IN A HENLEY 

Oof, Dean. I mean, I figured this convo would have to happen one day, it's been building, because even though his intentions are good, Cas has been involved in his fair share of shit taking left turns. Hopefully Cas is going to go seek out other angels. Also, re: Cas saying he's getting weaker - because, why? WHY. This has never been addressed in a definitive, satisfactory manner. 

Right, so, like we do each time, let's check in to see if we've had any character development and/or plot progression: 

Do Ketch and Rowena and Belphagor count, since they've progressed to being dead? Dunno, that's more of a finality to their overall arcs. Dean's being an asshole and Sam's being weepy and Cas is being an Eeyore, that's about par. Meh. Okay. So did the plot get advanced? 

YES THANK YOU FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER SWEET LORD YES. But, eh... a little weaksauce. Yes, that chapter of the initial onslaught is closed, yet we know it's not over. So I feel like the ep should've ended with, after the bunker door slams, a cut to a little scene that serves as a clue about what lies ahead. I mean, ahead-ahead, season-wise. Like, twenty second blip, not even, then hard cut to black screen, then on to promo which appears to be MotW. 

So that's it, really. More adept writers could've made the material of #1 and #2 into the premiere (minus several things, most specifically minus Kevin, should've saved Osric for something else down the line), then this should've been episode #2 instead of #3. Can't unring that bell, though. Let's hope we hit some speed before Buckleming comes along to run us into a ditch, then (fingers crossed) we have a few eps after that to rebound for the finale.

See you next week.

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Past posts, from newest to oldest (and I sometimes do addendums if a response warrants)

Episode 2

Episode 1