#also i draw with my mouse which is embarrassing

[yoonsivesworld]

DOES ANYONE REMEMBER DEADLOX ‼️ CAUSE I DO AND I SKETCHED HIM

(the masculine urge to render him like his old 2014 fanart was)

[samiwife]

Hi again can you do Headcanons and Preferences for Julian Casablancas ? I never found nothing about him, I would really love + the way you think and write it's perfect!

Of course! I love doing these. By far my favorite things to write! Also thanks for the support and request!!!! <3

Headcanon and Preferences 𓆩⟡𓆪 (Ft: Julian Casablancas)

𓆩♡𓆪= Smut

ੈ��‧₊˚= Fluff

⋆ ★= Angst

𓆩⟡𓆪 = Headcanons

Always sings for you

Tries to take you on tour but you always say no

Playing with his hair is a constant

You wear his leather jackets

He always wraps his arms around you

He's unbelievably funny

He's also very wise and mindful

You could talk to him for HOURS

Sleeps face down like a corpse (haha, I'M SORRY)

He's insecure about his lips (thinks they're too thin)

He always snuggles his head in your chest

You make fun of his style a lot

Gets jealous easily

Pouts when he's jealous

He doesn't know it but he has MUSCLES

Radiates gentlemen vibes

HE IS VERY CHIVALROUS

Does everything for you like opening car doors, carrying you to bed, etc

He makes funny faces when alone with him

LEAVES HICKEYS EVERYWHERE ON YOUR BODY

Speaks so many languages

Loves touring

Eats so little (it concerns you)

He drinks and smokes (which you hate)

Wears nice black boots with tank tops

When he wears belts, it kills you

Chugs energy drinks

Draws a lot but also writes song lyrics a lot

His smile is everything

Flirts with his fans

Has the funniest stares when he looks at you

You sometimes help dye his hair

Very medium-sounding moans during sex

HOWEVER, he is very good at doing oral

His tongue is a skill

Him fingering you drives you crazy ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

He sings when he's alone

Gets slightly embarrassed when you hear him sing

Has a lot of vintage music stuff like a CD player and records

Would wear fake mustaches to make you laugh

He loves to make you smile or laugh

Holds your hand when you're scared

Piggyback rides are common

He may be insecure about his lips but he is a good kisser

Loves eating dessert

Would choose sweets rather than an actual meal

Loves comedy films and watches them with you all the time

Hates studying and books (thinks they're for nerds)

Also hates going shopping but does it for you

He can be very mean sometimes

He makes fun of you like how you make fun of him

Playfully pushes you and hits you

Always fake cry when you slightly hit him

He always wears funny T-shirts

Also loves Disney movies

Has an undying love for Mickey Mouse (LMAO)

Makes his own loom bracelets

You mock him for having a shirt that looks like a mechanic would wear

His morning voice is so hot

Rides his bike but he sometimes falls off it

Great with babies but terrible with kids

He tries to act like an older brother in front of kids

He acts like a father with babies

Overpacks while traveling

His nails are always clean and neat

Has crooked teeth but it's okay

For some odd reason, he loves playing golf

Hates cold weather

Always looks like a grandma when the weather is cold

He gets sick easily

You steal his necklaces and bracelets

His favorite vacation spot is NYC

Speaks fluent French

Speaks French to confuse you

He's kinda dumb but you always teach him

He loves music class

Has strong political views

Loves learning about philosophy

Loves learning about space and planets

Has glow in the dark stars around his bedroom

Has the weirdest decorations in his room like a rocksalt lamp and stalker-like pictures of you

His favorite animals are lizards

He tries to skateboard but he keeps falling

Lastly, he kisses you a lot on the lips, cheek, chest, and much more. He also tries his best to make a better life for you. He talks about marriage a lot with you.

THANKS 4 READING <3

[sagepuca]

I came from Dictator Tirahs blog and your ask about starting an indie show and such. I’d love to read and see your OC’s if you’re okay with that ^^

YES THANK YOU I WOULD LOVE THAT!

I don’t have very much drawn and written yet but I promise someday I will drop full refs and lore for the whole series.

The indie show I want to make is called Aesopica, and the gist is it’s a fantasy adaptation of Aesop’s fables.

The three main characters are Tivera (the Cat), Conan (the Wolf), and Reynard (the Fox).

(I forgot to color in Conan’s cloak clasp in this picture so just ignore that)

Each of these three (who are usually the villains in Aesop’s fables) have been arrested for some kind of crime, which is revealed as the series goes on: Tivera, who’s been a pickpocket and thief her whole life, for petty crimes; Conan, who’s a former soldier and royal guard, was framed for the attempted murder of the General’s son; and Reynard, a former advisor to the king himself, was arrested for starting a coup and attempting to overthrow the king.

As these three criminal idiots escape prison together and travel across the country of Aesopica, reenacting Aesop’s fables and committing crimes, they are pursued by Kaleb, the Dog, a loyal member of the royal guard, and Ophelia the Crow, an enchantress-in-training eager to prove her worth.

As they all go through silly escapades, however, they discover a political conspiracy involving brewing civil war amongst the three political factions of the kingdom (Beasts, Birds, and Bugs, informally) and a possible revolution at the hands of Phineas, a Jackdaw lord and one of the leaders of the Flock (the bird faction).

(This bitch is the villain in case you can’t tell)

Anyway some other characters who I haven’t drawn in a while and I’m embarrassed to show old art of:

King Leopold the Lion: the king of Aesopica, very prideful and pompous but with growing stress about the state of his kingdom and the coming revolution.

Queen Moira the Mouse: the Queen of Aesopica by marriage, a shy and level-headed queen and Leopold’s loyal wife, however she’s starting to worry about her husband and his secrecy.

Madame Paloma the Crane: an ambassador of the Flock who lives at the palace and attends the royal Council. She favors monetary gain and tends to favor whatever decisions are good for her business, however she also likes to try to gain more political power for her party by flirting with both the king and queen.

Farley the Sheep: a studious and sheepish (or so his mother thinks) boy, the son of a general who’s just graduated college and has a bright future ahead of him. In reality though, he’s a reckless slacker who’s overly trusting. He had one of his eyes blinded in an assassination attempt, and his childhood friend (and possibly ex boyfriend) Conan was falsely blamed.

General Adaline the Shepherd: Farley’s mother, an extremely stern and fierce soldier. She dislikes Conan immensely and runs the royal guard with an iron fist. She’s getting older, and she once considered Conan her protégée, but that role now goes to Kaleb.

This series is going to have a comedic light-hearted tone that gets darker as it goes on, with a satirical twist on the morals that the classic Aesop’s Fables teach. I’m really excited about it and I love all the characters and their dynamics, and now that I know someone else is interested I might draw more content for it, lol.

Thank you for your ask, I love sharing lore for my OCs!

[remremsies]

Gang I’ve been gone for a while again I’m so sorry😔

I decided to come back and show y’all my OC who I’ll use while playing Our life now&forever!

Soo first I should warn you that there will be mild mentions of mental health issues and SH‼️ If these things trigger you, please skip my STEP 2 text or do not read this at all. It isn’t anything big, but I don’t want anyone to feel anxious while reading this🫶

Here it starts (I apologize for any grammar mistakes, English is not my first language)

Her name is Rosemary Salmonbay and some might say her surname is silly, but it’s a literal translation of my own surname! I love it, hehe. So, Rosemary is heavily inspired of my own life and almost just me. I made Rosemary a long time ago to make little stories that were inspired of my life and just as a way to cope. But she’s not 100% me either, because that would make me feel uncomfortable lmao.

I used picrew‼️ This is Toon Me!

STEP 1:

Rosemary is an awkward, shy and silly kid. An outcast, kind of. She’s very into anime, games and drawing. At first not very talkative and finds new people scary, but once you get closer to her she becomes very loud and energetic.

Rosemary enjoys playing outside with dolls, especially Monster High dolls and even dressing up as these characters. She likes drawing them a lot and making new outfits for them. Usually her doll plays are enspired by the games and animes she enjoyed.

She liked games that many other kids didn’t back then, such as Ib. Animes she watched were Ouran High School Host Club and Death Note.

As you can notice from the picture, she didn’t have much fashion sense because she just wore whatever felt comfortable and looked cool. Shirts with Mickey Mouse, Youtube merch and galaxy print.

Rosemary has tried many sports to have at least one hobbie, but nothing really fit her. Football was her favorite though. Rosemary was more into videogames and YouTube.

Moving to a new place made her very nervous but hopeful that she would make friends who wouldn’t judge her too much.

Rosemary gets called Rose, Rosie, Roses, etc. So many different nicknames and sometimes it annoys her, but doesn’t really stop anyone. She’s a bit bigger than other kids, which always made her feel embarrassed. A bit taller than most kids and didn’t like her tummy:(

STEP 2:

These years were the hardest for Rosemary, because she was very lost, didn’t know who was her true friends and even has some issues with her mother. But mostly Rosemary battles with herself during this time.

Now, Rosemary tries her best to stay away from any spotlight and has only few close friends. She doesn’t want any conflicts, so she has a hard time choosing sides whenever a classmates would have drama.

Rosemary’s escape is music and dancing now. She’s very into K-pop and J-pop during this time and has kind of dropped her old gamer and anime loving self. Though, she still misses those times when it was okay for her to be ”cringe”.

Her mental health declines rather harshly, even making her harm herself in certain ways to relieve overwhelming emotions. She usually regrets doing it afterwards, because it’s hard to hide and it makes her vulnerable.

Even though Rosemary says that she isn’t trying to fit in and is genuinely herself, it’s most likely a lie. She indeed is just trying to somehow fit in and make others happy. Rosemary starts wearing clothes that show off her body more in hopes of making herself like the cool girls and tries to learn makeup.

Rosemary gets more into studying herself and understand that maybe, just maybe this isn’t truly her. So, in subtle ways she tries to show her true self (such as jewelry). Rosemary accepted herself as pansexual/romantic already when she was 12, but for a long while she questions her gender. Being a girl feels right but also empty, being a boy is too much for her and nonbinary isn’t right either. But, she tries to ignore it.

She’s still rather chubby and hates it. It causes her to wear more ’boring’ clothes, because she thinks they won’t show others her bigger body. Rosemary only accepts Rose nickname during this time.

STEP 3:

Everything kind of starts making sense now. Rosemary is gaining confidence and got professional help for her problems. She accepts her actual style and doesn’t wear ’boring’ clothes anymore.

She’s still awkward and kind of anti-social, but tries her best and is more laid-back now. Rosemary only goes with her kind of people now and won’t force herself to fit in.

They also got back into gaming, anime and even started cosplaying sometimes! They still sometimes listen to K-pop and J-pop but more for nostalgia and during rough times. They’re also into makeup and fashion now, especially fashion styles from Japan.

Did you notice how I used they pronoun for Rosemary? Well, they finally realized and accepted themself as a demigirl! Rosemary prefers she/they pronouns but doesn’t really care if anyone uses he.

Rosemary isn’t entirely happy with her body still and also feels kind of lost, but is slowly and surely getting better. She’s trying to live healthy now, not working out to lose weight but to love her body no matter how chubby she was.

A bit more confident in themself, but still has ways to go and a lot to learn. They aren’t 100% certain what they want to do in the future, but have some ideas.

That was all I have for her now! I haven’t made one for Step 4 yet, but I’ll work on it. I’ll probably post more about her as well and maybe change some things. This is kind of like a first draft, but I doubt I’ll change anything drastically.

[frogs00]

I meant what I said. 1-100 thank youu Ari 🫵😚

1. What’s your favorite thing in your room?

Hmmm, maybe my mouse skull, or my rock and crystal collection- My bed and my pillow.

2. how tall do you wish you were?

Like 5’3-5’5

3. What color is your hair?

Carmel-ish brown with blonde streaks I guess. Natural.

4. What’s a rare fear that you have?

I have Cupid’s bow lips which is the rarest lip type. I don’t know. I have blue eyes.

5. Are you single?

I mean yes. I was in and out of a situation-ship for a while but I left that.

6. Has your heart ever been broken?

Countless times. But if you mean by an ex-partner then also yes. I was cheated on twice and one of my partners took their life.

7. What was your favorite thing as a kid?

I loved watching cartoons and stuff. But I also loved playing in the dirt, climbing trees, swimming; stuff like that.

8. Favorite coping mechanism?

Drawing and sketching probably. Also age regression but don’t do that often.

9. What’s your favorite love language?

My love language is probably words of affirmation despite not being able to take a compliment. Showing my affection and love to others is through acts of service.

10. How often do you get nervous?

When am I not nervous?

11. If you had three wishes, would you use them?

Yes. I think I would. Not sure on what, though.

12. If you could be fluent in any language which one would it be?

Spanish. I already know French and Italian, as well as English. I’m learning Hawaiian and Spanish. But I live somewhere where Spanish is used a lot so…

13. Where do you wish to live?

I like living in California. So here but even nearer to the ocean.

14. What’s something surprising about you?

I’m incredibly smart, hard to believe, but I am freaky smart. I’m not going to elaborate but yeah.

15. When did you last shower?

Uh, like an hour ago.

16. When did you first join Tumblr?

I had an account when I was 16 but I don’t know what happened to that.

17. Do you want any tattoos? If so, where, what, and why?

No, but I plan on getting some. I’m getting a semi-colan on my wrist in a few months.

18. What’s the most prominent dream you’ve had?

I’m sitting in a burnt field, it’s super foggy, and I can’t even see like 3 feet in front of me. I’m sitting down and then a raven lands in front of me. I’ve had this dream for five years now, it’s freaky.

19. What’s your dream job?

Probably an artist of some sort. Writer, painter, or musician. Not sure.

20. What is your ideal date?

Let’s go for a drive and watch the sunset while getting h*gh and eating sandwiches.

21. What do you wish you could do better?

Focusing. That was my biggest academic downfall tbh.

22. What country would you live in if you could?

I’d stay in the United States for personal reasons. But Perhaps someplace in Canada?

23. Who’s the best person you know?

My best friend (Literally obsessed with them) + my sisters.

24. Have you ever walked into something you shouldn't have?

Me and my friend walked in on two dudes fuckin’ once…

25. What's your favorite holiday?

Halloween. Easily.

26. When have you been most embarrassed?

I don’t really know.

27. What is your favorite Halloween costume?

Shark costumes are so silly! But I was a purge doctor 3 years in a row, also Angel costumes are top-tier (whether they’re cutesy or spooky lol)

28. What are you best at?

No idea, that’s opinion based, and my opinion on myself sucks.

29. Do you know how to tie your shoes?

Yes, I do. I learned really young lol.

30. Do you have siblings?

I have a LOT of siblings. 9 in all.

31. If you could know one thing about the future what do you wanna know?

Do I have my own apartment yet? (My roommate is annoying me)

32. What’s a dealbreaker for you?

Disregarding my feelings :(

33. What's your favorite current class?

I am not in college yet, gap year lolz

34. How many people have you dated?

Uh, I'd rather not share.

35. How often do you wash your hair?

Every other shower, depending on how my hair feels on my head I might do it every day (I shower every day)

36. Do you daydream? What about?

I daydream a lot, about a lot of things. My mind is always racing.

37. Where do you go to be alone?

I go on walks to the water tower or on casual hikes when I really need to be alone.

38. Which parent do you like more?

None of them.

39. What’s the one standard you hold yourself to?

I don’t have high standards at all for others but for myself? I am not sure.

40. Who’s voice do you enjoy?

I like listening to most people talk tbh :) (I’m a listener but sometimes yap)

41. If you could announce one thing to the world what would it be?

“We are all humans just trying to get by, and if you think about it that is kind of beautiful, so get over it and start loving more, dude.”

42. What’s one thing you wanna do but haven't yet?

See a Broadway play! I love musicals!

43. What do you wish you never did?

Hurt myself because I could’ve hurt a lot of people by doing so.

44. Do you believe in life after death?

I am an omnist, at the end of the day. I believe everyone has their own truth, and if I so happen to experience life after death, then that is beautiful, and if I don’t, I’ll be at peace regardless.

45. Do you prefer a book over a movie?

Yes, I do. I love reading and always find that they are better than the movie. But I still love movies heh heh.

46. What's your favorite season?

Autumn/Fall. I like the gloom and leaves and colors. Plus I’m an October baby (+halloween)

47. What’s your favorite time of day

Golden hour or nighttime. It’s so pretty.

48. Do you have a beloved stuffed animal?

Yes…. (Two Curious George stuffed animals and a bat plushie lol)

49. When is a time you wish you acted differently?

I wish I was more precise on my hurdle jumping so I would no longer be in chronic pain due to those injuries :/

50. What’s something you wish that you never bought?

My stupid waffle iron, I never use that thing.

51. Do you have your own room?

I do, although when it’s my days of the week with my sister I share it with her ^^

52. What’s your favorite book?

I don’t have a favorite, to be honest. The Art of Starving by Sam J. Miller resonated with me deeply, though.

53. Who’s someone you hate?

I don’t hate anyone, not truly anyways. (Maybe I do, perhaps my mother or bio father and mother or… or someone who hurt me deeply…But I don’t know…)

54. What’s your best hottake?

People should be able to do whatever makes them happy as long as it doesn’t hurt others! Whether it’s cringe or not. I love all of you (Unless you hurt people or support an obviously icky thing…)

55. What’s your favorite game?

Don’t roast me but… WolfQuest Anniversary addition… It’s a comfort! Okay?

56. When’s a time you felt real genuine fear?

I have almost died a few times so…

57. Are you a morning person?

I mean, no. But I’m not like grumpy and stuff in the morning. I just don’t like them lol.

58. Do you drink enough water?

I drink SO much water.

59. How different are you from the little kid you used to be?

So, so, so different. But that little girl will be healed regardless, eventually <3

60. Do you enjoTumblr?

… Yes? It’s a silly site.

61. have you ever had a Tumblr experience that made you wanna delete the app?

No, not really. I’ve had really messed up apps but I don’t really pay any mind to them.

62. What’s your least favorite game?

I despise Bitlife. No, I won’t elaborate.

63. were you a Markiplier fan?

I was a DanTDM and StacyPlays kiddo myself, but I guess.

64. how do you respond to compliments?

I can’t. I can’t take them, they make me happy sometimes but I also will argue with you and disagree and simply not believe you so…

65. What’s something that would make you fall in love?

If they let me bite them and they pat my head. (Actually makes promises and keeps them, genuinely likes my company, actually loves me-)

66. Do you believe in marriage?

I think it causes issues a lot, especially since I’m LGBTQ+ and stuff, plus the statistics on marriage don’t lie, but yes, I do. Do what you want! <3

67. Do you have a crush on someone?

I suppose.

68. do you like Tumblr?

Yes, I do ^^

69. Were you a Voltron stan?

huh?

70. What’s your favorite ship?

Regina x Janis! (Also part-time Cady X Janis and CadyXReginaXJanis shipper tho. I love fetchen too.)

71. What’s your favorite song?

I have too many to name, so I suppose I don’t have one.

72. Do you like loud crowds?

No, they overstimulate me :(

73. Have you ever created conflict on purpose?

Nah (Unless you count fanfiction hehe >:3)

74. How do you sleep?

Terribly.

75. Do you bite your lips?

I don’t know.

76. Do you use chapstick?

Yes, I can’t stand having chapped lips.

77. Do you have any pets?

Yes! I have a puppy named Cruz and I adore him!

78. What color are your eyes?

Blue? Teal-ish? Gray? My eyes changed color a lot idk.

79. What’s something you wish you could change about yourself?

Nearly everything… but the overflowing love I have for others and my empathy is something I’d keep.

80. Have you ever had surgery?

Yes. Do not recommend it (Joking, please get necessary surgeries as they're important and improve your quality of life!)

81. What’s your least favorite animal?

I don’t have one, all living beings are important- Mosquitos, flies, leeches, tape-worms, etc.

82. What’s something that you’re really bad at?

Excepting help.

83. Do you have any Squishmellows?

Yes! I do hehe

84. Do you enjoy fast food?

Not really :\

85. Do you like soda?

Yes, I love me a soda once in a while

86. What grade are you in?

I’ll be a freshman in college soon!

87. Do you wear any jewelry?

Yes, occasionally. I have a chain I wear almost every day and have multiple piercings.

88. What socials do you use?

This and SnapChat but it’s private and for family and friends only.

89. What’s your lowest grade in school right now?

N/A

90. What’s the latest you’ve stayed up till?

I’ve stayed up over 36 hours, dude. Probably longer.

91. Did you ever have bangs?

Yes, I don’t want to talk about it.

92. What trends did you hate?

Don’t know, dude, 2020 was a dark time…

93. What’s your favorite item of clothing?

These cargo pants and they’re super comfy and match my style and they make me bappy

94. Do you like dinosaurs?

YESSSSSSS

95. What’s your opinion on body hair?

I mean, I shave, so… It’s fine, it just isn’t a pleasant feeling on MY body personally. But people with body hair are scrumptious (as are people without.)

96. What’s your least favorite time?

None? I guess I kind of despise the afternoon because work lol.

97. Do you make a wish at 11:11?

Sometimes for the sillies lol

98. Do you have your phone on military or regular?

Regular

99. Have you ever been to church?

Yes.. don’t recommend THAT experience! but to each their own of course ^^

100. Are you lgbtq?

Yes, duh! I’m Pansexual and use She/they pronouns! Among other things, I’m figuring out lol, but yes, I am.

[tryan-a-bex]

Thank you to @mallory-x @two-hands-toward-the-sun and @seiya-starsniper for the tags!

Were you named after anyone?

I was first named after a kid my parents babysat, and then after a nickname I was given by a kid in Grade 4. Never was completely sure if he was bullying me or flirting with me. But it worked well when the internet arrived.

Do you have kids?

I have three and I love them to pieces but friends. Don't have kids until you are really really sure, because it is a lot of work and you don't get to pick what kind of kid you will get or even what kind of life you can give them.

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

I tend not to and when I do I make it very very obvious. This is because I am autistic and I don't really get it. Apparently a lot of my friends online are sarcastic, so maybe that will help?

What's the first thing you notice about people?

Hair and smile. Sometimes it's embarrassing how little I notice their clothes or height and honestly I almost never get eye colour. But if I smile at someone and they smile back, it makes my day!

What's your eye colour?

idk you guess. If you include my splotchy skin I bet you can find all the colours. So fun fact! My first kid had green eyes, similar to mine but greener, actually green. My next kid had blue/grey eyes, like you can see a bit at the top of mine. I figured I'd never be so lucky as to have a kid with beautiful brown eyes because I only have that little ring of orangy-brown at the centre. But my third kid has the most lovely brown eyes. Genetics is awesome!

Scary movie or happy ending?

I mean The Cat in the Hat (and I mean the book, not the movie) was too scary for me and it had a happy ending. So now that I'm grown up I can tolerate scary shows that are not horror genre -- Doctor Who, Sandman, etc. But it really should have a happy ending, and even too many cliffhangers will turn me off the show/series forever.

Any special talents?

I'm really good at asking socially awkward questions that make everyone else embarrassed for me. I also like helping people by sharing good information, which is really nice sometimes when I can make a difference in someone's life.

What are your hobbies?

I read a lot, scifi/fantasy, young adult, kids books, and at the moment lots of fanfic on ao3, and also some nonfiction, I'm especially partial to layman's physics but lately have been reading about bdsm.

I also crochet and craft a bit, and lately I've been drawing and writing fanfic. I'm so excited about my original story that I wrote for nanowrimo!

Have any pets?

No but my kid has a mouse and my sister has a cat, and that's good enough for me. I swore off cleaning poop when my kids were out of diapers.

What sport do you play/have you played?

I enjoy swimming but I'm too autistic for anything with a ball or running.

How tall are you?

5'6" 165 cm, totally average. Notice that in Canadian you have to give both.

Favourite subject at school?

I loved French, English and Math. Anything where I could get the right answer if I worked hard enough made me happy. The ones with fuzzy answers or requiring physical skill, less so.

Dream job?

I want to be so rich I can just go around building supported housing for all my friends and also lobbying for universal basic income. But if I have to work to earn money am I allowed to pick sex work? It's just the safety and logistics that I have to work out...

[chiocchi]

Chiocchi!

Big fan of your artistry. I love your art so much! And those graphic novels you have on ao3??? Heaven sent! I use them as an imagery reference if I read any similar trope haha!

I asked the same question to leafiloaf since I love them too, but I'll be very interested to know your artistic journey if you don't mind sharing. How did you start with your art?

Tysm for being in this fandom ❤️

youknowmevj! omg thank you so much! You're too kind 😭🥺❤️❤️❤️ And yess lots of love to leafiloaf

Thanks for the ask! I've never told anyone about it and I'm so excited I'll give you so much unnecessary context. Oops long post.

My artistic journey

I've enjoyed drawing since I was little, but mostly I just drew doodles in my notebook. Anime was a big inspiration for my style and I wanted to create digital illustrations too. When I was a teenager, I tried using a mouse and a PC, and my finger and some app on my phone, but the results were always terrible. I told myself it was because I didn't have a drawing tablet, so "of course my drawings will look ugly" and stopped trying.

However, I promised a discord friend that I would do a drawing for her in December 2020. So, I downloaded this app called "Ibis Paint" on my phone and, with all my effort despite my lack of ability, I drew Harry using the app and my finger jskldhfsa

I was so hesitant and nervous about showing it to her. I could tell it wasn't pretty, just "weird and awkward", and I felt embarrassed. But she told me it was good (LIES) and somehow convinced me to share it with others on the server. Despite feeling shy, I shared it anyway. To my surprise, three people told me it was pretty! I appreciated their kindness.

It wasn't until March 2021 that I returned to drawing digitally and on a more consistent basis. I was mainly doing fanart for a game that I liked.

In May or June (I can't remember exactly), I stumbled upon an artist who created incredible art using Ibis Paint. And I realized that I didn't need a drawing tablet, just more practice and skill, because if they could do it, then I could do it too! That was the moment I began taking art more seriously (still as a hobby, though!).

Due to the pandemic, I had a lot of free time, which I used to watch a lot of tutorials, practice gesture and follow the advice of artists I liked. With every drawing I made, I could see an improvement, which motivated me even more to keep on working hard (drawing became a source of comfort during those depressing times. It was just really fun).

In late 2021, I mentioned to a childhood friend that I wanted to buy a drawing tablet, and he asked me if I wanted his old one, which I excitedly accepted. Finally, I had the tool that would make my art incredible… or so I thought! I was terrible with it. For the first few months, I preferred Ibis paint and my finger. But I eventually got the hang of it! What I love the most are the multiple brushes and pressure settings. I'm such a hoarder, even if I don't use all of them ksklajdl.

In 2022, I participated in several bigbangs and zines, but what I'm most excited to talk about is the tomarry comic that I started.

My tomarrymort art

I've read tomarrymort fics since 2017, but I wasn't active on the fandom. In 2020, I joined a writer's server (all love to Amanda) and met the friend I mentioned earlier. So technically, you could say my love for tomarrymort lead me here kek

Even though my main inspiration was a game, here is some fic fanart I made.

This is my first tomarry art (July 27th, 2021). It's a scene from Genius by the Numbers. I think it looks weird kjdshk

I also made art for A Mating of Convenience, what started in beautiful rooms, Dripping Fingers and for Ale, beloved. (I think I've never posted these before.)

Then two things happened: I saw comic on ao3 (If I'll Ever See You by festivewind) and I was like "WOW! THAT'S SO COOL" and "omg we can upload comics!"

The second thing was me being rejected as a webtoon background artist (naturally, as I wasn't good enough for the specifics) and the spite made me want to do my own so I could improve my weakness (the grind never stops 💪🔥).

I read some of my old notes for story ideas (I'm not good at writing but I still had some snippets of stories). And boom! Love triangle but the 3 of them are idiots (affectionate). Fun fact: the original version had a murder, someone in Azkaban and someone hating the other forever :D

Don't pretend started as an anonymous work because some of my friends knew my AO3 username and I was afraid of screwing up the format (I don't know html) and looking like a fool DKJALKSJL I was also afraid of possible backlash (I'm an over-thinker).

None of that happened (comments were very kind and nice!) But idk, it was nice being anon. I'm awkward and shy and I usually don't know what to say to compliments (Sometimes a "thank you" doesn't feel enough but that's all my brain can offer 😭)

Then I made some tomarry christmas art and shared it on TRoR discord server and someone asked me if I had Tumblr and I said no but that gave me the idea of making one.

Since I planned Don't pretend as being a long story, I realized it'd take me a long time to finish it and I wanted to contribute to the complete tomarrymort works! That's the reason I took a pause and made A Soulmate Like You.

Anyway, I made this tumblr on January 2023, and the plan was to fill it with art so, eventually, when I found the courage to make my works non-anon, I could link to this page. Except that I posted one drawing, and that was enough for isalisewrites to know it was me HJKASDJLA. So I stopped the anonymous thing.

I'm still not used to being "perceived" 👁️👁️ but I've learned it's not bad. People have been really kind and I think I'm less shy now! I'm very happy to be part of this fandom with lots of kind and supportive people and incredible fics and fanart <3

[the-whumpening]

Meet the Character Monday #3

Ash - Tigerverse (The Caged Tiger, The Freed Tiger, The Pet Tiger)

[Image ID: A sketch of my OC Ash. The drawing is a shoulders-up portrait of Ash smiling and facing to the right side of the screen. As this is supposed to be before The Caged Tiger, his hair is shoulder-length and he is uninjured. His left eye is blank as if clouded by a cataract. He is shirtless and his muscles are clearly visible. The whole piece is done in shades of orange. /End ID]

(Ash smiling! Wow! Yes, it's possible! This drawing is representative of what he looked like right before his capture: happy, healthy, without major scars, but after he lost his stripes/tail/ears.)

Basic Info:

Name: Moss Pelt (Ash) Catteau

Age: 26(ish)

Birthday: Spring? (Aries) Ash doesn't know his specific birth date

Height: 6' 4" (193 cm)

Hair: Black

Eyes: Green

Favorite Color: Green or orange

Gender ID and Orientation: Is very comfortable as a man but has never thought about it (much more concerned about his status as human vs beast), is attracted to both men and women but once again never put much thought into it. If it needed a label, he might say he’s “my partner”-sexual. While I also wouldn’t call him “poly” per se, he’s not strictly monogamous in the traditional human way.

Pronouns: He/him (never, ever “it”)

Other: accidental autistic rep (oops), tiger-human hybrid creature

What's Ash's role in the story? Ash is a human(ish) barbarian and the protagonist of the Tigerverse series. He is the current partner of Evius, who was previously romantically involved with Ash’s whumper: Ozmund Greenthorn. Ash was originally created as a character for an ongoing DnD campaign, though the stories on this blog mostly divert from the canon of that game.

Fun Facts about Ash:

Due to his tiger heritage and upbringing, Ash can communicate with cats and (with some effort) most other animals. He’s also picked up bits and pieces of other languages based on whomever he interacts with most (including a little Elven from Kane and Infernal from Evius).

Ash, like all tigers, is red-green colorblind. He only learned this after being with the party for some time—he didn’t realize he had orange fur. In fact, Evius’ coppery tiefling skintone doesn’t look much different to Ash than his human disguise. He can, however, distinguish shades of blue and yellow. (I’m just now realizing he probably doesn’t realize Mouse’s hair is pink. Bummer.)

Even in his human form, Ash has heightened animal-like senses which often overwhelm him. For that reason, he tends to dislike crowded areas and sticks close to Evius or Kane in the city.

He does not have a barbed penis, but man do we love to joke about it lol

His intelligence is kind of paradoxical. He didn’t have any formal education, and just about everything he knows about the “civilized” world came from Kane, so he’s not exactly “book-learned.” But, for the same reasons, he doesn’t have a lot of social knowledge either. His intellect is mostly centered around his knowledge of the natural world and survival, as well as his keen skills of observation and problem-solving. When his intelligence increased from the mindflayer tadpole, it mostly just made it easier for him to learn things and put concepts together; it didn’t impart any factual knowledge on him. Almost like he had ADHD and got adderall for the first time lol

That being said, he did become more aware of all the social rules he hadn’t noticed or cared about before. Suddenly, he felt embarrassed at being seen nude because now he could put together that not everyone was as comfortable as him and that most people felt some amount of shame about nudity. It also helped him finally connect the pieces that his attraction to Evius wasn’t just platonic.

Hilarious corollary: Hsa (what the tadpole named itself) has experienced the world through Ash since it was implanted. Meaning, it has felt everything Ash has felt and seen everything he’s seen. It knows all his thoughts and feelings. It has seen aaallll of Ash and Evius’ . . . interactions.

Biggest Secret: Ash would love to have a big family and lots of babies. He’s even fantasized about being pregnant—he’s still a little shaky on exactly how humanoid biology works. (And Evius’ player has forbidden me from writing mpreg fanfic boooo)

[vierrel41n]

Ugh guys university has been destroying me 😭 tell me why I asked for help and my TA told me to google it bro it’s your job to teach me what is going on???

Also I have my last midterm this week so hopefully I’ll be back to posting bahlk stuff after that

First image is my trying out drawing with an actual reference for the first time it turned out good though I like it.

Second picture is Mrs Constanta Cat. She’s a lull old timey coz the time period is like >1960’s. She is responsible for unleashing a creature of the underworld because she wanted to uncover the mystery of her dead husband and a cult indoctrinated her into helping them unleash the creature (its name is Meowzebub). Also she has an adoptive Mouse daughter named Poppy 🥱🥱🥱

She’s very nice and sweet 😁

3rd picture is just a sketch of an mlp oc she’s a lil crazy. She wants power to make her friends like her again it sounds childish but it’s less so once I go deeper into it. I’m thinking of making her the Sunset Shimmer to Holly’s Twilight. Since we’re doing the whole Equestria girls thing.

Speaking of which, here’s a draft of Holly grown up but not yet ruler of Equestria

Will colour soon. Also here is what the wise old elf will look like

I forgot to sketch him so this is close enough except imagine a broken horn like it’s destroyed. And eyebrow wrinkles.

Also I need your opinion is it embarrassing to make a somewhat spidersona except he’s a talking fox man asking for a friend. He was intended to be a hone but that certain friend got attached so he’s real now 🥱

I have another spidersona I will show you soon

Very exhausted I will spend many sleepless nights trying to study for my midterm 😒

[just-a-carrot]

Hey Carrot do you have any beta designs for your characters that your willing to show I don’t really care what game it’s from I just love your character designs in general and how you draw them… ya that’s all

Do you mean like designs of characters for games I haven't made yet? Or like early art of games I've released?

Tbh I don't really have any other art of original characters (except for like,,, REALLY old stuff that is literally embarrassing to look at LOL) as until I began doing game dev I pretty much mostly only drew fanart 🤣💦 I don't have any beta-ish art for Easter, as everything I drew at some point got used either in-game or online (and I also just didn't draw all that much for Easter because I drew everything with my mouse back then which was tiring and took a long time ldkjfad).

I do have some early art for OW from years ago tho. OW was going to be a variety of different things, from an RPG horror (but I got too frustrated at my lack of pixel art skills) to a storybook-style VN without sprites and just CGs (but I quickly realized it would literally take me years to finish). And I still have some old art and assets from those versions. Everything looks very weird looking back on it now,,, also it was again all drawn with a mouse since I didn't get my tablet until two summers ago. But I can share some of it here!

You can see that some of these clearly influenced some of the Arc 1 CGs lol...

And here's some assets from the RPG Maker version:

Actually I forgot there were even two different RPG Maker ones LOL This deep dive reminded me that I started one in VX Ace, then decided to change to MV so started all over again. Dang I really tried to start making this game so many different times in so many different ways 🤣💦

[religiouslywormie]

Apparently I'm Supposed to Introduce my Tumblr

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: 　Hello, I'm Toby　:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ✧

∘◦ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ◦∘∘◦ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ◦∘

I'm not completely sure what to write for a proper introduction. Although I guess the entire point of a blog is that I have a place to ramble about nothing super important.

Welcome to my Blog＼\ ٩( ᐛ )و /／ ..i guess??

Why don't I tell you a bit more about myself. ✩₊˚.⋆*im prob talking to myself*⋆⁺₊✧ My name is Toby, as I said. I go by a few other names as well. To tell you a few; Parker, Wormie, and Mouse. I'm 22 years old and I'm from the unfortunate state of Texas.

✩₊˚.⋆*although my birthright would point to an unwavering love of country music and jesus*(༎ຶ _｣ ༎ຶ )

As is the way, and this is in fact tumblr; I do indeed identify as queer. My pronouns are they/them, as I am agender. And, by the nines, on top of all that I'm also in a relationship.♡ ～(‘▽^人)

✮ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆｡°✩ And here are a few of my favorite things ✩ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆｡°✮

My favorite videogame of all time is Watchdogs2, in which I have beaten the game 7 times. I'm currently on my 8th playthrough because it's just that good. Now another game I love, and yet despise with a passion is TheSims4. It's a great game with a lot of fun things to do with your sims. ✩₊˚.⋆*like toturing them*⋆⁺₊✧ I like the direction the game has gone in and I'm glad the devs have made an effort to hear the fans in spite of EA and parts of the community. Finally, the two games I'm playing currently are BuldarsGate3 and Skyrim. I enjoy the chaos and misery I can cause the NPCs in either game. My favorite musical artist is Melanie Martinez as is felt through my Spotify as she has been my top artist two years in a row. ✩₊˚.⋆*its a little embarrassing how many times I've listened to the Portals album on repeat*⋆⁺₊✧ I also enjoy music from Penelope Scott, Sin Eater is literal perfection. While I listen to a lot of indie and Experimental, my love for music really took off with early 2000s rock. I still adore music from bands like The Pretty Reckless, Get Scared, and In This Moment. I also enjoy creating things and reading. I usually make crude, poorly made digital edits for fun. The skills I once had in digital and traditional art are heavily lacking because I'm so out of practice. Although recently I've found that I prefer writing much more to drawing. Reading has always been something I struggle to do. I read at a snails __@'-' pace, but because I enjoy writing, I kind of have to read. Luckily it's gotten easier overtime the more I read.

∘◦ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ◦∘∘◦ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ◦∘

This is turning into an essay and my hands are getting sore. (_　_|||)

I'll go ahead and finish this before I keep rambling. I'll probably use this account to write about random things like lore of some kind, original characters, random thoughts, ect.

Thank you for reading my "about me". I hope you enjoyed learning about this accounts user. Ok Bye. (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧

∘◦ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ◦∘∘◦ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ⋯ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐶ ◦∘

[thedisneychef]

Kona Cafe's Macadamia Pineapple Pancakes: Recipe with Sauce

Kona Cafe's Macadamia Pineapple Pancakes are a delicious and indulgent breakfast option that offer a taste of the tropics. Served at the Kona Cafe in Disney's Polynesian Village Resort, these pancakes are a popular menu item that draw inspiration from the flavors of Hawaii. The pancakes are made with a fluffy and buttery batter, studded with crunchy macadamia nuts and chunks of sweet pineapple. Topped with a dollop of whipped cream, these pancakes are a decadent breakfast treat that is perfect for a special occasion or a lazy weekend morning. In this context, we can explore the cultural significance of macadamia nuts and pineapple in Hawaiian cuisine, and how they have become popular ingredients in a variety of dishes and desserts. We can also discuss the importance of using high-quality ingredients, such as fresh pineapple and locally sourced macadamia nuts, to create a delicious and wholesome breakfast. Finally, we can highlight the unique experience of dining at the Kona Cafe and how it offers a taste of the tropics in the heart of Disney World. More Delicious Recipes You Will Love: - Lemon Garlic Shrimp Spoodles Recipe: A Delicious and Easy Meal - Mac And Cheese With Red Wine Sauce – Jiko - Magical Star Cocktail – Disney Parks So last week was Fat Tuesday and it has always been a tradition for me to have pancakes for good luck.  And I’m in the midst of my post-trip Disney blues, which meant that no ordinary pancakes would do.  I’m craving Disney, in the worst possible way…  For lucky pancakes, nothing short of Disney pancakes could be considered acceptable. Apparently, I must have pleased the Tiki God of pancakes (is there such a thing?) because not only did I manage to find the perfect pancake recipe, but it is from Kona Cafe at the Polynesian. Can I just say, if there was ever in the world a recipe that was more like a warm hug then this one, honestly, I don’t know what it is.  First off, that amazing smell every morning that floats through the Polynesian?  Turns out it’s these pancakes.  It’s the most beautiful smell and it instantly brought me back to Disney.  All that was missing was the tiki music and a tropical fountain.  Seriously, I got a little choked up. I’ll admit that while these may not look terribly gorgeous (and they don’t at Kona either), as far as taste, let me just say…  Pure heaven.  These may be the best pancakes I’ve had in my entire life, and that’s saying something as I’m quite the pancake connoisseur. They taste deliciously sweet, and the pineapple paired with the butter creates this beautiful, nutty, tropical flavor that goes so well with the pancakes.  I’m not joking when I say that now I crave these pancakes…  All the time.  They’re really just that good. I made no real changes to the recipe, other then accidentally burning the toasted macadamia nuts ever so slightly.  I suggest making the pineapple sauce first, allowing that to cook while preparing the pancakes.  The nut butter keeps really, really well in the fridge and, as I’ve discovered, tastes good on everything.  I’m almost embarrassed to share all the things I’ve put it on. A simple-to-make, insanely delicious pancake recipe that makes my house smell like the Polynesian?  I may be in serious trouble… ~~~~  °o°  ~~~~ In addition to the delicious food and recipes, Disney World is also known for its unique dining experiences, such as character dining and themed restaurants. Whether you want to have breakfast with Mickey Mouse, dine in a replica of a sci-fi drive-in theater at Hollywood Studios, or enjoy a meal with an ocean view at the Coral Reef Restaurant in Epcot, there's something for everyone. And with the help of Recipes Today and the How to Make category, you can even recreate some of these magical dining experiences in your own home. So why not start planning your next Disney-inspired meal or dining experience today? Read the full article

[lonewolflupe]

I know anon hate made people leave the fandom and is pushing people to make the same decision, which saddens me deeply. I'm only relatively new to this Tumblr community, and I know it's natural to see people come and go, I just want them to be able to make the decision for themselves and not being pushed/motivated by hate they're receiving.

I'll leave it to that with the anon hate and will focus on art now ❤️ Because I know your struggle, I've been (seriously) drawing for almost 20 years now and only picked up drawing humans because of this clone community. Drawing humans is HARD, anatomy is a b*tch and proportions not my cup of caf. But if I look back at my art when I started drawing clones, I can see I've come a long way.

Some drawing tips below the cut (that no one asked for but I'm gonna drop them anyway) (:

#1: practicepracticepractice. You'll only grow when you keep practicing! And sometimes the result just sucks, but don't take it too hard on yourself; it's part of the process and your artistic journey.

#2: use references!! Screenshots from TCW, photos of humans (could be their faces or poses or just mash them together), but also art from other artists. I really like to add 'sketch' to my google search (for example: 'male torso sketch'), because I find it very helpful to see how other people draw certain parts/expressions. Keep those references open on your screen when you're drawing, see how the shapes and styles work. And don't feel embarrassed about using other artists' art as reference (you can always credit them, I think all artists love to see how their art inspires others)! Go and experiment and see what you like and what works for you, before eventually establishing your own style!

#3: you don't have to stick with one style. Took me a while to find this out, actually. Also once you've found a style, you'll keep improving if you keep drawing. So your style will most likely keep changing as your art journey continues, and that is totally fine!

#4: you can always use paper and pencils. Especially when you're not really confident with using your digital drawing tools and software yet. Go get that pencil and just sketch, fill that paper up! I used to do this when drawing with a mouse (because have you ever tried sketching digitally with a mouse? I find it's impossible). Sketched something you really like? Take a pic of it, transfer it to your computer/tablet/drawing device and trace it with proper digital lineart (it's your own work, after all)!

#5: don't be too hard on yourself. I'm a bit of a perfectionist so I know this is easier said than done, but just try to be kind to yourself <3 No one expects you to become a digital Picasso overnight. Just give yourself time and space to grow, and struggling mostly means you're progressing to the next phase of your artistic journey!

So far my ramblings, I hope this is useful to you (and anyone reading this)! Please keep continuing because I love your art and I'm sure you'll get even better if you keep practicing ❤️

Dear Sunny,

I'm sorry for the recent anon hate you received. I can totally understand how this weighs on you, how this is totally demotivating. I find it so sad to see anons spreading hate around here. But please remember there's also still so many around to support you! I really hope you'll keep drawing, because I love your drawings and can't wait to see how you'll grow if you keep trying (I'm still learning myself with every drawing)! <3

Kriff disrespectful anon, have Hardcase love (this is him whenever he looks at you):

Thank you so much! The hate saddens me for the fandom at large as much as it hurts me personally.

Your words mean so much to me! Thank you. I struggle with art because I’ve been trying to do it for so long. It’s only since getting a tablet and picking it up again I’ve made any progress. It took a lot to post any art because I was incredibly self conscious about it. Until this anon my art has always been met with encouragement. I am trying to focus on that.

Thank you so much for beloved Hardcase heart eyes!!! Omg he’s adorable!!!! (Going to go over here and scream/snuggle him he’s so cute!!)

[yesimwriting]

The Needs of Pain (part 2)

A/n since y’all liked part one!!

... i think i could make a part 3?? we’ll see lol 

This is the LONGEST thing i’ve written on here wow,, and the smuttiest 

Warnings: teasing, oral, unprotected sex (pls this is my first time writing full smut be gentle lol)

-- 

Exhaustion is an odd result of pain. I didn’t think I was that tired after the burn. I certainly didn’t feel sleepy while Kirigan cleaned my shoulder and brushed his soft lips and sharp teeth along my neck to distract me from the pain. Why am I even thinking of that? Of the way his breath felt against my skin, the way his tongue soothed any bites he left against my skin. I breathe out flatly. 

Stop thinking of him. Stop thinking of him in that context--that’s why he did it. He enjoys getting under people’s skin, that’s why he’s always insulting the way I see the world. My hand reaches to my neck, touching my skin where I can still feel his lips on my skin, tracing the faint marks I had seen in the bathroom mirror.

I should have asked the healer to get rid of them before they fully formed, but the thought of showing them to anyone was too embarrassing to bear. I force my hand away, dropping it onto my pillow. 

He had acted so strange today, he had been so blunt. It was a tactic. He wants to be in my head and I’m giving him what he wants. I sigh, rolling over and pulling my duvet further up my body. It’s too hot for this. Ugh. I kick the duvet off of my legs, letting my nightgown wrinkle up my body. Strong hands could pull the fabric up in a similar, yet much more euphoric way. 

No. Who’s thoughts are these? The fact that I picture the same hands that dabbed at my burn earlier today has me questioning my sanity. I can’t sleep like this. Kirigan wanted to be in my head and now he is. Damn him. I can’t stand him which means I can never have him.

Desire has nothing to do with tolerance. The thought leaves my face warm and stomach twisted. 

I sit up sharply, sliding out of bed tiredly. I’ll get some air and everything will be fine. The moon will clear my mind.

The Little Palace is strangely twisting at night, all long shadows and yellow lantern light. I slip out of my room quickly, but my thoughts are not immediately banished with the change of scenery. I must be ill. Infection must have set in regardless of my efforts and the healer sealed it beneath my skin and now it’s impacting me. Fever. I’m delusional with fever. 

“I didn’t take you the kind for a late night trist.” 

His voice leaves the hairs on the back of my neck standing like soldiers at attention. I manifested him the same way people manifest the devil. “Air.” My defense is childish. “I couldn’t sleep, so I thought I’d get some air.” 

The sound of even footsteps leaves me frozen in place. “What keeps someone like you awake?” It’s like he can read through me. “Thoughts of me?” 

He can never know. “Obviously.” 

My sarcasm doesn’t go unnoticed, he lets out an almost humored breath. “Or perhaps it’s pain.” 

The comment is so confusing I almost don’t realize he’s bringing up my shoulder injury. How had I let him see me so vulnerable? Why did he seem somewhat concerned in his own way? 

“My shoulder’s perfectly fine.” Good. A normal direction for this conversation to head. “It took the Healer all of two minutes.” 

The touch on my shoulder is so sudden I almost jump. Kirigan doesn’t shy away at that, fingers firmly brushing down the skin. “It feels the same.” 

I could scream. His strange observation means nothing to me, but the implication is enough to drive me mad. The implication that he knows my skin well enough to be able to judge whether the healed skin feels different is sickening. I’m tired of this. 

I turn on my heels, all of my tiredness and irritation twisting in me. “Even if it didn’t, it’s none of your concern.” 

“I didn’t realize you were extra irritable when you’re tired.”

Every conversation with him leaves me feeling petulant. “I’m not tired.” I cross my arms, keep my expression set. “I just--I wanted to get some air.” 

“Hm.” He takes a step forward, preparing to close the small distance I’d managed to create between us. “And why is that?” 

The question leaves me irritated in an odd way. A flat way. There’s a narcissistic entitlement in that question. An entitlement to my thoughts. I shrug. “I hoped it’d make me tired.” 

Kirigan draws his eyebrows together, curiosity and something resembling amusement playing at his expression. “If you’d like to be tired, I think I know a few ways to be of assistance.”

A faint, aggravating warmth comes to my face. Not only did my lie earn me a ridiculous innuendo, it’s also trapped me in a corner I cannot escape. Healing from the burn had left me pathetically drowsy. There’s no way he can’t see through me, a tired haze has to be visible on my face. My eyelids feel weighted and I’m too distracted by my deep longing for sleep to hold onto irritation. 

“I’m sure I’ll manage on my own.” The words are not meant to be a challenge, just a way to dismiss him. I don’t think he takes them that way. 

He draws his eyebrows together, eyes threatening to lose that curious quality. Kirigan steps forward, I step back blankly, desperate to keep enough distance to keep what’s left of my wits about me. He ignores my reaction, taking another step forward. I take another step back. My back touches the wall. I am a mouse and he’s an excited cat. 

“You don’t have to,” his voice is too low, too intimate, “I’m not sure that’s something you want to understand.” 

My chin raises just slightly, a silent protest. “Dependency is a fatal flaw.” 

“So is desire,” his reply is much too quick. “Desire is worse, because one can resist dependency based on pride...but desire, that is something that one sacrifices for.” 

Maybe if I was less tired I’d bother to interpret his words a little more. But all I can focus on is his tone--the quality of it. “You sound heavy.” My voice is as light as the night breeze I was craving moments ago. “But you always sound heavy.” It’s the wistful observation of someone slowly disappearing. “At least you’re pretty,” I muse, falling more and more distant by the second.

Something soft breaks across his features, his lips quirking. “Pretty?” 

I rest my back against the wall comfortably, eyes shutting without permission. “I’m sure I’ll regret that comment in a moment.” 

He stays silent, but his presence does not disappear. I can’t tell if I’m glad for it. The warm touch on my shoulder startles me out of my drowsy trance. Panic has me ready to jump off the wall, but Kirigan brushes his thumb up and down my shoulder. His touch sets any skin that comes in contact with him aflame. I shouldn’t find the gesture so comforting. My eyes flutter shut again, my body relaxing against the wall. When my protest dies out before it begins, Kirigan shifts closer. I’m confused, but too at peace to answer. Something velvety and warm brushes against my collar. Soft and warm and electric. He’s kissing my skin again. 

My lips part in hopes of arguing, but when his teeth graze the skin he already marked earlier I’m gone. My eyes shut again, but this time it’s different. Pleasure and drowsiness clear me of all inhibitions as his touch becomes more and more assured. I let him test me, his mouth moving against any and all exposed skin. I don’t even stop him when I feel his hands graze the hem of my nightgown, wrinkling it the way I imagined earlier. 

“Kirigan.” I need to find my strength, but what’s the point of strength when his touch leaves me so warm? The only acknowledgement of my protest he offers me is the lingering squeeze of my thigh before his long fingers begin to graze towards the inside of my thighs. I have no choice but to let his lips brush up my neck, his teeth grazing my skin the way they did earlier today. “Kirigan.” I try to sound firmer, but he destroys the rest of my sentence before I have the chance to get it out. His teeth nip the base of my neck, ruining my protest for a second time.

 Maybe if I was less tired I’d be able to fight him off a little better, but I’m so drowsy I had trouble thinking before he started touching me. My eyes shut in both bliss and exhaustion. His thumb presses into my hip. Something in me stalls as his fingers brush the hem of my underwear--testing me, challenging me. I open my eyes on instinct, but he remains unbothered, slipping his thumb beneath the only fabric that divides us in order to better grip my hip.

I stiffen because of how badly I want to melt. This is bad. This is insane. We’re in a hallway in the middle of the night and he’s General Kirigan. Whatever attraction I feel is another tactic to manipulate me. 

“We need to stop.” The command is weak, my voice as dry as my resolve. 

He angles his head in order to regard me a little better. His expression is one of mock confusion as he smirks. Actually smirks. “Stop what?” False innocence drips from his voice as he leans towards me, expression amused as his lips near my own. “I haven’t even started yet.” My eyes widen, something that amuses him. “Y/n?”

I’m left on edge. I’m left wanting. My lips part flatly, but words feel so distant. “Yes?” 

“What happened earlier?” His voice is the kind of sinful that’s meant to coax. Kirigan brushes his thumb across my shoulder, eyes watching mine cautiously. “How did you get burned?” 

I push against the sultry quality of his voice. “I told you--an accident.” 

“Hm.” His eyebrows draw together in a surprisingly soft way. I stare at him freely, but he ignores my gaze, eyes locked on my newly healed skin. Is he truly that concerned? “Whose accident?” 

I swallow once. “My own.” He still isn’t looking at me. “I’m not exactly the most coordinated person, you’ve witnessed my clumsiness yourself.” 

Kirigan is not convinced. Perhaps he will never fully buy my partial lie. His grip on me hardens. Restraint. I may not be able to win against his paranoia, but I might be able to distract him. Cautiously, I move one hand forward, touching the hand that’s on my shoulder. I hesitate. Touching him without prompting almost feels too intimate. I’m being ridiculous. I brush my fingers against the back of his palm, letting my touch trail up his forearm. 

“Y/n.” My name borders on a warning. 

I suppress a smile, playing into my sleepiness as I tilt my head to the side. “Yes?” 

He doesn’t reply, expression tightening as my hand snares around his wrist, pulling it off my shoulder with more care than I thought myself capable of. The intensity of his gaze is enough to burn me. I turn my full attention to his hand. I’d never admit this out loud, but this isn’t the first time I’ve thought about how objectively attractive his hands are. I kiss each of his knuckles slowly, brushing my lips against his skin tentatively. 

To my surprise, he allows my indulgence. I glance at him through my lashes. Kirigan’s eyes are shut, expression bordering on pained. “Kirigan?” 

He opens his eyes but his expression does not ease. His other hand leaves my thigh, grabbing the low collar of my nightgown with such a fierce speed it takes me a second to realize what’s happening. He pulls me away from the wall in a way that borders on violent. 

“I don’t know who you’re protecting, but I guarantee you they’re not worth it.” The words are acidic. He’s seething. “I grow tired of your resistance.” 

If he hadn’t transformed into something so untamed, I might have had enough gall to tell him I grow tired of being toyed with. I say nothing, instead I take in the abrasiveness of his anger, the tension of his grip on the thin fabric that clothes me. I am unflinching in my assessment in the most tired way possible, eyes struggling not to shut and body desperate to rest, but even more desperate for him. His eyes stare into mine, searching for something I am too far gone to offer. He must realize my sleepiness is genuine because he soon drops his gaze, taking his time in analyzing the even rise and fall of my chest as well as the hint of cleavage his grip on my nightgown is exposing. Pure heat finds itself in my face, chest, and worst of all---core. His staring lacks any shame. 

Kirigan parts his lips as if to speak but then instead takes a moment to lick them. The thought of his tongue in relation to lips only makes the burning in me worse. It’s practically an ache. A needy one. 

“I grow weary of your lack of understanding.” 

Understanding? “What is there to understand?” 

His head angles itself to one side but he doesn’t meet my gaze. The hold he has on me loosens just enough so that his hold on me is no longer taut. That should not disappoint me the way it does. I wait patiently, ignoring the bundle of unexplained nerves in my stomach as best as I can. Something strange colors his features when he finally looks at me again, something almost vulnerable. 

“I brought you here.” He sounds farther from me than ever. “I…” His exhale is gentle, but his expression is quick to harden. “Who are you so willing to protect?”

I must be really tired because his voice sounds like it borders on heart ache. If I didn’t fear Arthur’s safety I’d tell Kirigan everything if it meant his pain would dissipate. I never thought Kirigan’s potential pain would bother me, but now that I’ve seen him look stricken by something so weighted--now that I’ve seen the way he wears pain--I don’t want to be the one to give him that. I want to be the one to give him some kind of sanctuary. The thought leaves me with a desire to flea. 

“Will you just believe me when I say it’s no one?” In a way that’s the truth. Arthur is not particularly significant unless you’re a young Grisha female with a desire for heart ache. “No one worth mentioning at least.” 

He’s quick to retighten his hold on my nightgown, leaving the fabric taut and more of me exposed. “You being desperate to protect them makes them worth interest.” A different response than I expected. 

My lips thin. “Only because it was a small accident. They don’t deserve to be punished over the briefest loss of focus.” 

I take his silence as an indicator that he is considering my words. His free hand finds my shoulder as he pulls me even closer to him by the fabric he’s gripping. “And if I were to revoke the threat of punishment?” His voice is the definition of temptation, low and promising and coddling me with its sinfulness. I still as Kirigan leans forward so that his lips are practically on my ear. “Then would you tell me? If I released you from the binds of your nobility?” My lips part but I have no words prepared. Before I can think of what to say, his lips graze the side of my jaw before his teeth nip at the end of my ear. “Tell me just to humor me.” 

The command doesn’t make sense to me, but from his lips it feels important. “You won’t hurt them for what happened?” 

His voice seems rougher than before, “Would that make a difference?” 

“It would make all the difference.” I don’t like the honesty of my words. 

Kirigan allows one hand to trail down my waist--a gesture I consider obscenely intimate when paired with the soft brush of his lips on my collar. “I already know who.” His voice is a dark hum. “I was always going to know one way or another--but it’s good to know you would have told me.”

My stomach lurches, dread pouring into me like tar. Before fear can force me to take action, Kirigan begins to leave open mouth kisses from the top of my jaw to the bottom of my neck, taking his time to assault any spot of skin with his tongue that he wants. This reminds me too much of earlier--touches meant to distract from pain with the use of pleasure. 

“Are you--” His mouth is now on my collar, threatening to destroy my question. “Are you going to hurt him?”

At that Kirigan straightens. The sudden lack of contact leaves me cold. I shouldn't be thinking of him. Of his touch. “I’m curious,” he draws out each syllable, delighting in my nerves, “Would you bear his punishment?” 

I’m not sure. I hate that. I haven’t known Arthur for that long, and while he’s kind, he also seems to see all women as replaceable. That isn’t reason for him to endure Kirigan’s punishment but I don’t know him well enough to just blindly agree to that. I loathe myself for not being noble enough to take Arthur’s punishment instantly. 

“What kind of punishment?” 

Kirigan’s expression twists into a greedy smile. He pushes me back easily, pressing me into the wall with more confidence than ever. I’m silent in my confusion until he presses himself against me and I feel something hard and bulging press into where I’m neediest. I stifle a gasp of surprise and something similar to pleasure. “I’m sure I could think of something for you.” I’d care more about my confusion if hot need wasn’t flooding my thoughts and my body with undeniable desperation. “I haven’t even spoken to him.” I exhale, untrusting relief desperate to escape me. Kirigan is quick to lean forward, lips brushing my ear as he prepares to whisper. “I’m more likely to harm him because he has your favor than anything else.”

Warmth burns my face. “He doesn’t--he’s not exactly the one that holds my favor.”

The heat of his breath adds to my burning as he presses his bulge into my core again. “And who does?” 

I’m not sure what he considers favor, but if it has anything to do with wanting he wins. But he can never know that. “There are some contenders, but no one yet.” 

His hand moves off my hip and nears my throat. “Would it be too bold to assume I’m on the short list?”

He’s two steps away from taking me in an open hallway, I doubt he finds much bold. “Do you want to be?” 

Kirigan’s hand tightens on my throat. “I’ve made it clear from the beginning what I want.” His words are lethal and each syllable has him restricting my airflow a little more. Something in me must be broken because my neediness only worsens. “I brought you here because I see all that you could be. Forget being a Saint, we could be gods.” The sentiment is so raw it’s almost harder to bear than his tight grip on my neck. He leans close again, his scent only adding to my budding lightheadedness. “Say the word, and I could have you praising me like I’m already a god.” My stomach knots in both nerves and insatiable hunger. “Though I’m the one that would be doing the worshipping.” 

My resolve is shattered, leaving me broken and twisting. He releases his hold on my neck in order to move his hand beneath my chin. There is nothing gentle about the way he jerks my head forward, forcing me to look into his eyes. Something about the look he gives me has me melting. His eyes are searching for something in me.

He must find whatever he’s looking for because I feel his touch against my heat, fingers pressing against fabric. I bite my lip on instinct, suppressing the sound of my undoing. Kirigan’s eyes never leave mine as the hand on my chin moves to brush against my bottom lip. 

“I can only give you what you want if you tell me what that is.” 

He exhales slowly, pressing his thumb against my lip downwards. My mouth parts on instinct, something that he takes well. His thumb enters my mouth slowly, taking in my reaction as I taste his skin on my tongue. Kirigan pulls his thumb away from my tongue slowly, a thin string of saliva connecting him to my mouth. With one swift tug, his free hand pulls the only fabric separating him from where I want him most down my thighs. His expression reveals nothing as his thumb, still wet with my saliva, is pressed against my core. His touch teases my clit, just barely brushing where I need him most. The whine that escapes me is so desperate I’m ashamed I can’t help it. 

“So wet already,” his appraisal is gentle, the praise whispered against my throat as his lips brush against my neck. “So wet, so needy that you’d let me take you in this hallway and I’ve hardly touched you.” His finger presses further into me. I let out another pathetic breath. “A pity, someone like you--so painfully under cared for.” I’m reduced to nothing by his words and touch. “What I’d give to undue you here, against the wall--I’d have you crying so loudly everyone would know that I’ve claimed you, that I’ve made you mine.” Before I can reflect on his words, he steps back, pulling my underwear back up as quickly as he yanked it down. 

I let out an instinctual whine. My hand moves to his arm, grabbing him like he’s the only thing keeping me tethered to the earth. “What--” 

Kirigan squeezes my hand, a predator’s smile on his lips. “I want to feel all of you,” his hand squeezes my hip, “I can’t exactly do that against a wall, dove of mine,” he leans forward, lips brushing against my jaw in a way that leaves me chilled and melting at the same time, “At least not the first time.” 

His whisper forces my breathing to hitch, a fact that he notices with an amused look as his thumb brushes against my collar. Kirigan pulls me away from the wall easily. Even the causal touch feels electric against my skin. 

The walk towards my room is tense, his hands never leaving me as if he’s aware of how necessary it is to keep me distracted to ward off my better sense. When we reach my door, Kirigan opens it like it’s his. Entitled. Typical. 

I step into the room, his touch lingering on my arm. A brief shyness pushes itself into my chest. I had let Kirigan touch me in a public space and lead me back to my room. The door closes. I don’t turn. 

Kirigan’s hand squeezes my shoulder. “Shy, now?” His question is teasing, rekindling the fire beneath my skin as he places an open mouth kiss on my neck. He plays with the thin strap of my nightgown, pushing it off my shoulder. He kisses down my neck, collarbone, and shoulder. My inhibitions are melted away again. “When your breathing stalls like that,” his whisper is enough to elicit a desperate shudder, “I am left desperate.” 

He leans forward, mouth trailing down my chest, coming dangerously close to my breasts. The electric current of his touch is all consuming and addicting. I press my back into his chest. His hands are the opposite of shy, touching me everywhere except where I’m most desperate. Kirigan’s hand places itself between my thighs, using his thumb to tease my entrance. I let out a needy sound. And then he retracts his hand, grabbing my shoulders and turning me in one swift motion. 

“Kirigan.” 

His eyes are dark, clouded by something I don’t understand but am too aware that I reciprocate. “Tell me that I have your favor.” His words are taut, bordering on snapping. Kirigan’s grip on me tightens hard enough to bruise, an assertive need taking over him. “That you want me.”

Desire, pride, and rationality twist in my stomach, leaving me too distracted to form words. My gaze drops to the ground on instinct, something Kirigan clearly finds unacceptable because he’s quick to grab my chin and force my eyes to meet his. 

I swallow once, courage withering beneath the look in his eyes. It’s as twisted as a spindling shadow, but the look is fierce admirational, appreciation so deep I could drown in it. It scares and consols me all at once. “I want you.” There’s something pained about such powerful emotion. I loathe and am empowered by it all at once. “I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anything.” The words leave my throat scorching with their sincerity. 

As soon as the words leave me, he’s closing the distance between us, the slightest exhale of tension leaving his lips before they meet mine, prepared to devour me. I reciprocate his actions on instinct alone. There is no hesitation, no space, and yet it is not enough. Not enough and yet I don’t know how to be closer. But Kirigan does. One of his hands cup my cheek, coaxing me towards him as if I could possibly have the will to leave him. He steps forward, guiding me to step back. I obey fluidly until I feel something hit the back of my legs. It’d startle me if I wasn’t so consumed by his touch.

His mouth begins to move away from my skin. I chase after him, desperate to keep him touching me. He stops me by placing a hand on my shoulder, a warning about my neediness. I pout, but as he studies me I pant. Maybe the excuse for air was a good idea. I don’t fight the uneasiness of my breathing as I hold Kirigan’s gaze. He regards me with a patience I consider unbearable, taking in the determined look in his eyes, my swollen lips, disheveled hair, and the top of my night gown that’s half falling off. 

It’s in this moment I realize how much more vulnerable than him I am. 

If Kirigan notices any shift in me, he doesn’t mention it. Instead, he adjusts his hand on my cheek, his thumb brushing the hot skin gently. “You are everything.” His voice is cracking glass. “Everything that’s good, at least.” 

Maybe he did notice my initial reaction because I am no longer certain that I am the one that’s most vulnerable. “You’re better than you think.” I only say this because it would only weigh on me more to stay silent. “I see it and you don’t want me to.” 

His hand continues to stroke my cheek. “I want you to see all of me.” The heavy beating of my heart seems to stall in my chest. Kirigan drops his hand before grasping the hem of my nightgown. He pulls the fabric upwards easily, bundling the fabric above my hip. “I want you to…” He exhales flatly, pulling the fabric upwards even more. Nerves flood my stomach as he leans towards me, kissing down my jaw. “To know me,” he whispers against my throat.

I am nothing but uneven breaths as he mouth moves down my chest, stalling only once he’s reached my breasts. He pushes me forward easily, guiding me so that I’m laying on my bed. He’s quick to move over me, kissing up my neck as he adjusts so that I’m against the headboard.

When he pulls away again, I’m left pouting. He grins, fueled by my disappointment. “Don’t worry,” he breathes, fingers hooking around the waistband of my underwear before tugging it down my legs easily, “I’m nowhere near done with you yet.” 

Being so exposed has my doubts flooding back, but Kirigan is quick to fight against my instincts in a way only he seems capable of. He squeezes the inside of my upper thigh before leaning down, pressing his mouth onto the skin his fingers just touched. His kisses here are meant to leave me even more desperate, each nip and fleeting pass of his tongue is lazy yet intentional. I am incapable of doing else besides letting out pathetic whines. 

He ignores where I need him most, kissing up my thigh, across my lower stomach, and then down my other thigh. Kirigan continues the pattern across my skin, ignoring any pleas I swallow my pride to give. He is not rushed by my words or cries or the occasional desperate adjustment of my hips. 

Kirigan lifts his head slightly, releasing my inner thigh with an obscene ‘pop’. “Patience.” His fingers trail up my thigh and over my core, teasing my entrance with his lithe fingers. “Unless you’re ready to beg?” 

It’s a challenge, like everything else. The urge to give him my pride to satisfy the electric desire I’m not sure I’m capable of bearing. But then I note his tense hold on my thigh. A sign of restraint, of want. 

“And if I want you to beg for me?” I don’t know where the words come from, but they charge the room with potential. 

Something strange crosses his fingers before his lips tilt upwards in a dark way. “Would you like the strength of that? To have someone like me powerless before you?” My face warms. Kirigan leaves a lingering kiss on my thigh before he moves off the bed. I sigh at the loss of contact, but my tired neediness stalls at the sound of his belt coming undone. “I want to see you on your knees.” I sit up carelessly, desperate to obey him. I’m kneeling in front of him in an instant, taking in his length. The size of it has me gaping. “Open your mouth.” 

I take the order more eagerly than I should, but I make no move to take him. This is just another challenge. I keep my eyes on his as I stick my tongue out before licking the bottom of his member all the way up to his tip. The sound he lets out is pure sin. I lick his tip slowly, each motion of my tongue is strategic as I finally place him in my mouth. I hollow my cheeks, moving up and down slowly. 

The pace is not enough for him, he grips my hair from my scalp as he thrusts into my mouth. The motion is more powerful than I expected and I am left unable to breathe. My slight gag does the opposite of discourage him, he repeats the motion again and again, pushing himself into me until I can feel him in my throat. 

The sounds he lets out are a chorus to me, but it’s not enough. I need more control, I need a way to make him beg. I raise a hand, wrapping it around the base that I cannot fit into my mouth. I stroke him once slowly, making a point as I try to push myself back in order to make him want me more. 

He groans again. I make a point of pushing myself off of him. Precum protrudes his tip. I lick it off of him slowly. I lick up and down his member in the smallest way possible. 

“Y/n,” the restraint in his voice fuels my teasing, “Tease me and you’ll still be overwhelmed by want when the sun rises.” 

A pout tugs at my lips before I open my mouth again, taking Kirigan to my limit. He lets me set the pace of my bobs at first, but then he becomes desperate, holding me in place by the roots of my hair as he moans and thrusts into me without restraint. He ignores my choking as he continues until he throws his head back, letting out a quick praise of my name.

He finishes in my mouth and I swallow all he offers me greedly. I back off my knees slowly, throat burning as his member leaves my mouth. “On the bed.” He’s turned into something insatiable. “Now.” 

I move back to my bed, laying in the same position as before. He takes his time approaching me. When he finally gets to me, he kisses my thighs easily. I let out a small breath before something that’s pure pleasure meets my core. His tongue laps upwards lazily, grazing my clit but not quite touching it.  My hips thrust towards his face, but with hand he holds me down. A coil in my stomach continues to build as he angles himself more purposefully, tongue finally taking care of my clit. My gasps become less and less reasonable as he continues to lap at all that my body has to offer. The coil tightens, I see stars--and then, like cruelty personified, he pulls away. His absence leaves me ready to cry out. 

My desperation only fuels Kirigan as he lines himself with my entrance. Concern twists my stomach as I consider how full my mouth felt when he was in me. I expect some level of warning, but he thrusts into me with no warning. I let out a pathetic cry, but that means nothing to him as he pulls out just to thrust into me with full force again.

“Only I can hurt you,” he demands, thrusting into me as I call out his name. My eyes water at the sensation of such fullness, pleasure and pain combining themselves in a way that leaves me incapable of thought. “Your tears,” he muses, one hand moving to wipe at a tear rolling down my cheek, “Are mine.” 

His thrusts become more and more brutal, less and less even. Each movement of his body in mine leaves me begging for more and less at the same time. He continues until the coil in my stomach tenses to the point of breaking. 

“Kirigan,” I manage, voice far away, “I’m going t--”

“I know,” he offers, “finish with me, dove.” His hand finds my throat, adding the slightest bit of restrained pressure. “And do not hold in your cries.” 

Two more sharp thrusts have us both finishing, calling out for each other as we try to draw out the high of our orgasms together. 

We stay intertwined like that for longer than we should, but then Kirigan stands. I envy his ability to do so. I don’t call for him even though I still don’t want to be alone here. A moment later, I hear him approach. I’m too drowsy to ask what he’s doing as a damp towel is wiped against my forehead and inner thighs. 

When he’s finished cleaning me, some raw emotion settles in my chest. “Are you leaving?” 

Kirigan hesitates. “Not if you don’t want me to.” 

I roll over, the motion leaves my body aching. Kirigan accepts my invitation, crawling beneath my sheets and adjusting our bodies so that he can rest his hand on my back. 

--

Tags: @luminous-99 @voyevoda-thejoy @voidmalfoy 

@i-padfootblack-things

 @all-art-is-quite-useless @buckverse @mandowh0re @benbarnes-supremacy

@we-love-our-bandz @fire-in-her-veinz @weirdowithnobeardo @bvudzsoo @kaque @ponyboys-sunsets @coldlilheart @granillx @dreamohlittledreamofme @sanna2020 @zaynzierulez 

@ive-died-everday-waiting-for-you @xxaerynxx @ralesera @tea-effect 

@tranquillitymoon

[mysmemissme]

Up the Rabbit Hole

Summary: You have a problem- you can't stop thinking about how good Barbatos looked in that bunny costume. It's interfering with your studies, duties, and even your friendship with him. With no clue what to do, you begin to avoid him.

Barbatos, however, is not fond of this fix, and when his patience runs thin, he offers you a more unorthodox solution.

Pairing: Barbatos/ Reader

Rating: Explicit

CW: Prostate massage, anal fingering, collars, slight master/pet

Read below the cut or on AO3 

A gift for my friend for Barbatos’ birthday! Enjoy!

It was all that bunny suit’s fault.

Ever since everyone was forced to don those dumb bunny costumes, you had been an utter wreck. You couldn’t focus on your studies, earning you an earful from Lucifer. You couldn’t focus when you were cooking, earning complaints about the pitiful state of dinner from everyone but Lucifer. You couldn’t focus on Mammon’s schemes, or Levi’s games, or Satan’s recommended books, or Asmo’s fashion advice, or Lucifer’s lectures, or Beel’s workouts, or even something as simple as napping with Belphie. You couldn’t focus on anything.

Except for the mental image of Barbatos in that bunny outfit.

Why it had enchanted you so much was a mystery. Maybe it was the change in wardrobe; the way the vest highlighted his slender waist and broad shoulders, the lime green tie bringing out the same shade in his eyes. Maybe it was the ears themselves and the charming tail that accompanied them; the ears revealing a cutesier side to the ever-serious butler, and the fluffy tail drawing attention to his rounded behind. Maybe it was watching him work in the suit, catering to guests as serious, as dedicated, as always, despite the circumstances. Maybe it was the way he wore it all with no shame, not embarrassed in the slightest at the large ears, rounded tail, and odd situation, retaining his confidence through it all…

Maybe it wasn’t a mystery why you liked it so much after all.

Either way, your thoughts and preoccupation with the memories of Bunny Barbatos were providing you with issues- the biggest of which being that you couldn’t even talk with Barbatos anymore. You couldn’t make eye contact with him without thinking about floppy ears and a firm build. You couldn’t listen to him speak without the deep timbre of his voice igniting fantasies mid-conversation that left you a stuttering mess. Even simply being near him caused your brain to derail, hands to sweat, and heart to pound.

In one moment of weakness, you bought a dark green collar you saw while browsing the web, one you knew would look amazing on Barbatos, especially paired with the cursed ears and tail. You hid it in your bedside table, refusing to acknowledge just how far gone you were, refusing to acknowledge the new images, fantasies, and dreams it sparked.

You, in embarrassment and for your sanity, started to avoid him.

You weren’t dumb enough to think this would solve the problem, especially with how sharp Barbatos was. What you had hoped was that Barbatos would tolerate your finicky behavior without prying just long enough for you to get this problem under wraps.

For a while, it worked- Barbatos allowed you to make your escape, sending any messages he needed to tell you through the brothers. He left sweets wrapped with notes attached on them for you to enjoy on your bed. If you ended up in the same hallway, he kindly ducked into a nearby corridor in order for you to pass unhindered.

This game continued for two weeks- you avoiding him, and Barbatos letting you. His patience was commendable, and it was just another thing you admired about him. He let you go, again and again, in an unusual game of cat and mouse.

But everyone’s patience runs out eventually.

It was on the fifteenth day of this arrangement that Lucifer handed you a note. It read:

                 Dear,

Meet me in your bedroom tonight at eight ‘o’clock sharp. There is something we must discuss. No more running from me.

                               Sincerely,

                               Your faithful servant, Barbatos

 You read over the note again with trepidation and glanced at the time on your D.D.D.- 4:01. You had four hours to prepare yourself for the inevitable conversation you knew was to come. Four hours to get yourself under control. Your stomach tied itself in knots.

Stupid bunny outfit.

               -----

Time flew, and before you knew it, eight was upon you.

You paced outside your door, fidgeting with your hands and hair. Your nerves were getting the best of you. What if he rejected you? What if he no longer even wanted to be friends with you? What if he called you a kinky freak and exposed you? What if he convinced Diavolo to send you back to the human world?

‘What if’ upon ‘what if’ piled up in your mind, each one more ridiculous and implausible than the last. It was agonizing, not knowing what was going to happen when you stepped through the door and faced Barbatos. You felt the seconds tick away, each pressing down on you more and more.

Finally, you couldn’t stand the pressure and anxiety anymore. You flung the door open and stepped into the dimly lit room. There, on your bed he sat with-

With bunny ears on and the suit to match. Suddenly, you felt like passing out.

When he saw you enter, he moved to stand, and a flash of light from his neck caught your eye. The bunny ears had distracted you from the rich, dark green velvet adorning his slender neck, the gold chain attached matching the golden detailing and swirls on the green.

It was the collar you had bought. He was wearing the collar you had bought and hid.

“That- that’s the- But I- How’d you- Why’re you-,” you stuttered. Your thoughts were a jumbled mess, and they all came rushing out in an incomprehensible mess you continued to stumble through, even as Barbatos glided towards you. He raised a gloved hand and caressed your face when he was near enough to. He shushed you.

“A few days ago, I came in here to drop off a slice of Devil food cake, and I intended to leave a note. However, I seemed to have forgotten a pen. I didn’t mean to pry, but I figured that one such as yourself would keep a pen near your bed, so I looked in your bedside table. While I certainly did find a pen to write with, I also found this charming collar hidden away. It seemed to match perfectly with a certain outfit I wore not too long ago. Care to explain?”

His facial expression never changed, but his eyes shown with a mischievous sheen, his voice filled with amusement, and there was a slight self-satisfied quirk to his smile. You could try and lie your way out of this one, but it was clear he had figured you out long ago. You sighed.

“I think you already know everything, jerk,” you grumbled, before continuing louder. “Fine. You were really hot in that bunny outfit, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I bought that collar because I thought it would look good on you, and I was right. I’ve been having inappropriate fantasies about you, which is why I’ve been avoiding you. There, happy?”

He chuckled. “Quite. Hearing such flattering words come from you is always welcomed. Since you were so honest with me, I believe you deserve a special treat.”

“What do you mean by ‘special treat?’ Like dessert?” He hummed, obviously amused.

“No, I believe something else is in order. You mentioned certain… fantasies pertaining to me, did you not?” You nodded dumbly. His lips twitched, and he reached for his tie, slowly loosening it. “Well then, since you were honest about having them, as a reward I’ll allow you to fulfill them.”

Your brain was running a mile a minute but still couldn’t seem to catch up. “Fulfill my fantasies?” you questioned.

He fully removed his tie, moving to lay it on the bed. He then began to undo the buttons on his vest and shirt, revealing inch-by-inch more of his pale skin. “Yes, fulfill your wishes. Touch me as you wish, direct me as you want. Command me, your humble servant.”

It was like his words had cast a spell on you, because suddenly all the desire and lust you had been repressing for the past weeks welled to the surface. Your hands itched to touch, your tongue to taste, and your eyes to look upon him below you.

“Lay down on the bed.”

He did as told, and you closed the distance in a second, straddling his body. His dark hair fanned out against the pillows, bunny ears tapping the headboard. His eyes practically glowed with a mix of satisfaction and interest. His shirt and vest were completely undone, hanging open. You swallowed.

You pushed the shirt and vest down his arms, and with his help, you removed them completely. Now that his upper body was completely visible, you couldn’t stop your hands from dancing along his shoulders, collarbones, and chest with frantic energy.

“You know,” you started, voice thick, “In my fantasies, I like to spoil the always-composed butler with attention and pleasure till he so overwhelmed that his mask breaks, and I get to see him beg. Spoiling someone who always works so hard, like they are my pet who did a good job, and this is their reward.”

“Then by all means, Master, reward me, your humble bunny.”

You didn’t need to be told twice. You leaned down, pressing kisses along his flawless skin from his partially exposed neck, to his collarbones, to his nipples. Your lips latched onto one, sucking and tugging lightly with your teeth, while the other one was pinched with your eager hand. You heard him sigh, but that wasn’t enough- you wanted to hear him lose his composure completely.

You move to the other nipple, laving it with attention as well, till both nipples were hard and perky. Once you were satisfied with that, you continued your path downwards. You alternated dotting his skin with kisses and light nips, stopping to suck here and there. When you passed his belly button, getting ever so close to the waistband of his pants, you felt his stomach tighten in anticipation.

You reached for the button on his pants, undoing it and shoving them down to his ankles, stopping to admire the bulge in his boxer briefs before shoving those down, too. His cock now free and hard, it stood proudly towards his stomach, leaking precum.

You wrapped your hands around it, looking up at Barbatos’ face for any sign of change, but his expression was as placid as always. Using the precum dripping from the tip, you wet your hands, before setting a steady pace of jerking him off, slowing at the tip to rub your thumb against it.

You looked up at his face, yet his expression had not changed despite the pleasure.

You were going to have to up your game if you wanted him to melt beneath you.

You stopped your ministrations, leaning over Barbatos to reach into your beside table. You pulled out the lube you had stashed there, closing the drawer, and moving back down Barbatos’ body. You spread his legs and settled between them, popping the lube open. You poured a sizable amount onto your palm, then began rubbing your hands together to warm the liquid.

“This okay?” you asked, circling your middle finger around his tight hole, but not entering.

“Touch me as much as you want, wherever you want,” he said, voice husky. You rolled your eyes.

“Is that a yes? I need a clear one.”

“Then, yes.” He spread his legs even wider, giving you ample access.

Now that that was out of the way, you tentatively pushed your finger into his tight hole. With your free hand, you grabbed his cock once more, stroking it to make sure he felt good even while you stretched him.

You began to thrust your finger in and out, letting Barbatos adjust to the sensation. When you felt him relax and loosen slightly around you, you added a second finger. He hissed at the additional digit, and when you checked to make sure he was okay, his eyes were closed, eyebrows raised and furrowed.

You stopped moving. “Is this-,”

“Yes, it’s okay. Keep going,” he grunted out, wiggling his hips. You started thrusting your fingers again, and he sighed.

Oh, okay.

So, he was feeling it, but you still wanted more.

You replaced your random thrusting with rubbing against his inner walls, searching for what you knew would cause him to crumble. It took a few moments, but you knew the second you felt the bump that that was what you had been looking for.

You began to circle the small bump, applying steady pressure, causing Barbatos to arch off the bed. Proud that you had gotten such an obvious reaction out of him, you doubled down, circling faster and tightening your grip on his cock as you continued to jerk him off.

You then alternated between circling, tapping the bump, and rubbing it in a ‘come hither’ motion. Barbatos’ legs began to quiver, and when you glanced up, you saw he had become a mess- panting with his mouth open, sweat beading on his brow, and cheeks flushed pink. You stared in wonder, adoring his reactions.

And yet, it still wasn’t enough- he still hadn’t made any noise.

Desperate for him to moan or gasp or anything, you replaced your hand on his leaking cock with your lips, circling the tip with your tongue and licking the underside, before taking him in your mouth.

“Ah!” he gasped, bucking his hips, pushing his cock further into your mouth, the taste of his salty precum and his smell overwhelming your senses. As you took him deeper, you applied more pressure on his prostate, all while keeping your motions random.

It was then that Barbatos’ poise began to collapse completely. He started wiggling his hips, thrusting forward and backward like he was chasing both the warm heat of your mouth and the shocks of pleasure your hand was providing with his prostate. One of his gloved hands came down to rest on the back of your head, fingers wrapping your hair and holding you in place as he used your mouth. He moaned as he fucked your mouth roughly, cock touching the back of your throat.

Then, a loud moan he released caused you to look up once more, only to meet his hazy gaze as he stared down on you pleasuring him. Your eye contact seemed to add fuel to the fire as the grip on your hair tightened, and his thrusts became faster. From how he was biting his lips and arching his back, you could tell he was close, so you ground your fingers against his prostate, harder than before, right as his cock was fully sheathed in your mouth.

With the simultaneous overpowering sensations, he came, sighing long and low as he filled your throat with his cum. You managed to swallow most of it, though some slid down your chin. After a few seconds, when he was done basking in the afterglow of his orgasm, he pulled his softening cock from your mouth, and you moved back from between his legs so he could pull his pants up.

Once he was tucked back in and pants buttoned, you figured you were done and went to stand, only to end up flat on your back on the bed, Barbatos straddling you in a surprising role reversal of earlier. You gaped up at him. His face was already back to normalcy, but his lips were shiny with spit and his hair tousled.

He reached up, taking off his bunny ears and putting them on you. He leaned down, licking the cum off your chin before whispering against your ear.

“Now, it’s my turn.”

[ordinaryschmuck]

What I Thought About "Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door" from The Owl House

Wow. They are really pushing it for that secret message, huh?

Anywho--Salutations, random people on the internet who certainly won’t read this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons!

I think it goes without saying at this point that Season Two of The Owl House is setting itself up as a season without filler. Now, filler episodes aren't always bad. Yes, it hurts when a series turns away from the main plot for a week. But at best, they're utilized as a chance for the writers to play around with the characters and developing said characters without it relating to the overarching story. So, some people who see that consider it a bad thing that a series doesn't have that many filler episodes.

I like to call those people: F**king morons.

Don't get me wrong, I see where some of you are coming from. And I'd be willing to agree...if The Owl House was a plot-driven series. Which it's not. It is a character-driven series. Because for every plot thread and narrative that the show presents, they always relate to the characters and develop them further each time these threads get brought up. For example, look at "Knock Knock Knockin’ on Hooty's Door" (It pains me just to write that). Several narratives move forward, and it’s all done to make the characters grow. And to explain how requires going into spoilers. So keep that in mind as you continue reading.

Now, let's review, shall we?

WHAT I LIKED

Hooty: Might as well start with the character that this episode is about.

To tell you the truth, I wasn't a huge fan when I found out we're getting a Hooty-centered episode. I've grown to love him over time, but he is a comedic character that's best used in small doses. Primarily due to how his voice is grating to me (My ears are still bleeding...). With that said, I do really love his contributions in "Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door" (Seriously, there couldn't have been a less awkward title?). Hooty's antics when trying to help everyone are as hilarious as they are heartwarming. He deeply cares for his friends but just doesn't understand how his plans could do some unintended harm, which is pretty lovable if you ask me. We also get some surprisingly great insight into his character, as he feels insecure about basically being the comic relief who doesn't really do that much other than being funny. Rarely do you get that level of dimension from a comedic character, and it's even more uncommon for that to work out as well as it does here. It once again proves just how competent the writing is in this series to the point where we get an episode about Hooty, and it's funny and heartwarming instead of being annoying. And whoever is responsible for that, you're the best.

Lilith’s Letter to Hooty: I mean it when I say that I love how Lilith kept her word about her and Hooty becoming penpals. Their friendship was something I would have never expected to love, and I'm still shocked that it works so well, so seeing it continue like this just warms me to the bone. Plus, it is pretty sweet that Lilith's kind words are what inspired Hooty to do what he's done in this episode...meaning it's Lilith we should thank here--SON OF A WITCH! Even when she's gone, she's still working her way into my heart!

King going through Puberty: What?! KING IS EVOLVING!

(There, I made a Pokemon reference. Do I get my cookie now?)

Eda Keeping Herself Awake to Train Herself: I'm willing to bet a large sum of money that this has everything to with Raine getting captured last week. If Eda was still the most powerful witch in the Isles, she might have actually saved them. But she isn't, and now the love of her life is in the clutches of a tyrant planning something that could potentially be the end of everything. So I can understand Eda pushing herself to her limit to get back on top again, as I would probably do the same. It's not healthy in any way, and Eda would be doing more harm than good. But when it comes to the people you love, logic doesn't always win out in the end.

Luz Wanting to Make her Way into Amity’s Heart by Making the Echo Mouse Happy: ...That's it. I Just...I just love everything about it, ok?

This was also when I knew that I was wrong to doubt that there would be zero Lumity in this episode. I realize my follies now, and I humbly apologize.

Hooty Teaching King About Demons: This was so funny. So, so funny. Probably doesn't come as a surprise, especially since The Owl House proves itself as a comedy before, but the jokes have never hit as frequently and as hard as they did here. From Hooty getting offended by King's dance to him and Dana's insert wanting a "DNA sample," everything managed to successfully make me lose my s**t. It does come at the expense of King suffering, but I can stomach that much more than if it were Eda or Luz. And, as a bonus, we get lore about how demons work, added with another great joke of King getting in trouble with Hooty for saying he already knows this stuff. Humor isn't always the show's strong suit, but when it works, it f**king works.

King Wanting to Know What he Is: But despite how funny King's vignette was, we still get to see more of his character grow. We learn that he's frustrated now that there's this big question mark over his life now, feeling extra angry that his father "abandoned" him to leave such a present mystery. It shows the hidden resentment he has that Lilith inadvertently brought out, made even worse when King's father hasn't responded to the video yet. King hasn't really gotten that much development until "Echoes of the Past," so it's pretty cool that the writers haven't really slowed down on it. Especially when it leads to these great moments of King venting his frustrations.

King’s Shouting Powers: KING learned FUS RO DAH!

(And now that's a Pokemon reference AND a Skyrim reference. WHERE'S MY GOSH DANG COOKIE!?)

Eda’s Nightmare: If King's vignette hits you hard with the laughs, Eda's will absolutely hit you harder with the feels (never make me say "feels" unironically again). Knowing that Eda's life got thoroughly screwed over by the curse is something we could figure out on her own. But seeing just how much the curse ruined her life and tore apart relationships that mean the world to her really does a swell job at ripping apart the soul. What's even more tragic is, technically speaking, it's all sort of Eda's fault too. She kept hiding the curse, refusing to be a burden to others who would do all they could to help. If she had only been open and honest, things probably wouldn't have changed much, but they most likely would have been better than they are now.

Eda Attacked her Father as the Owl Beast: ...I don't know what I was expecting when "Keeping Up A-Fear-Ances" hinted that there was some possible tension between Eda and her father...but it definitely wasn't this.

The fact that we see blood where his eye used to be doesn't make things any happier, either.

Raine Broke Up with Eda: Before we get into anything else, let's celebrate the fact that it's now confirmed that Eda and Raine really did use to date in the past. Because this show is just f**king phenomenal with its LGBTQA+ representation!

But, seriously, this is a fantastic reveal that goes far beyond just shipping...well, sort of. It shines a new light on Eda and Raine's interactions from last week, revealing that while they're not a couple anymore, they still very much love each other. It helps make their last interaction especially tragic, as they were both on the same page now and could very well be together again. Only for them to be forced apart for the second time in a way that's much worse than the first. And I frickin' adore that this series changes the impact of one episode one week later. Again, it shows just how competent these writers are, and kudos to them for making something so...perfect.

The Moon Person: WHO THE FU--Nope. Nope! We have more than enough mystery bulls**t to deal with through CreepyLuz and Philip Wittebane, so I am PUTTING YOU ON THE BACKBURNER FOR NOW!

(They're probably nothing more than a one-off character, anyway)

The Owl Beast and Eda are Connected: Through visuals alone, we, the audience, can clue into what the curse really means. The Owl Beast doesn't want to be a part of Eda as much as she doesn't want it to be a part of her. Whether they like it or not, and they very much don't, they're stuck together. The thing is, and this is what I love the most, they still decide to make the best of their situation rather than let it ruin their lives even more. This might be the best possible turn Eda's curse could have made. It'll still affect her, and there are probably more negatives than positives, but at least now, it's not the worst thing in the world. And I feel like that's all anyone can ask when in a position like her own.

Eda's “Pretty Dream”: I don't know what emotions are toiling inside me more with this moment. Awe and wonder over how beautiful Eda's dream is, or heartbreak over the implication that she has only had nightmares since getting cursed...I'm gonna say both. Yeah, it's definitely both.

Eda’s Harpie Form: Well, fan artists are gonna have a field day with this...especially the freaks.

(You know who you are. And you're weird!)

Luz Calling Amity a “Cotton-Candy Haired Goddess”: ...Have I ever mentioned how much I love this show?

Hooty Kidnapped Amity: ...Hooty, if your stupidity wasn't charming, I would be more than willing to call the authorities over how you kidnapped a girl in your version of a knapsack and locked her in the basement. For that is going to ring SO MANY alarm bells in people's heads.

Amity and Luz Stuck in a Tunnel of Love: *Smacks lips* Mmm. The adorable awkwardness of this moment is just *chef's kiss* magnifique!

Luz being afraid of getting made fun of:

Amity’s look of hope: I mean...just...f**king--LOOK AT HER:

That is the look of a girl who, while embarrassed as hell, still is ecstatic to learn for a brief moment, everything that she is hoping for has a high chance of being real. Who, in their right mind, wouldn't go "Aw!" at something so pure and innocent?!

Luz Destroying the Tunnel of Love: This is how to effectively utilize dramatic irony. The audience can understand why Luz is tearing the place apart because she explicitly states that she's afraid of Amity rejecting her in the end. They also know that's bogus, thus making it extra painful to watch Amity's heart break more and more with each second (which is perfectly represented through Amity's expressions). You feel bad for both of them, and even worse when you know that it can easily be prevented by the simple art of communication. That's what makes it great dramatic irony. Knowing the point of view of each character results in a scene that evokes emotions in two different ways.

Hooty’s Breakdown: This was...genuinely hard to watch. Not that it was badly written, far from it. It just...hurt seeing how destroyed Hooty was when he realized he failed the people he has such an admiration for. On the upside, a wholesome moment follows soon after as the Owl House gang tries to reassure Hooty that he's done a lot of good that night. It's a pure action that shows even though Hooty gets on their nerves all the time, they still care about him...damn it. I think I'm gonna cry.

Eda’s Advice for Luz: ...Eda...You're the best.

You found out that your surrogate daughter wants to ask a girl out, and not only were you quick to deliver the best possible advice ("Just go for it!"), but you also quickly reassure her that it doesn't need to be perfect.

And you know what? That's it. Eda is the best cartoon mom! She might not technically be Luz's mom, but I don't give a s**t because she is the best!

Luz and Amity Ask Each Other Out: Shh-sh-sh-sh...

Do you hear that?

...

...

...It's the sound of dozens of Lumity fans collectively losing their s**t...and I'm one of them.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

HOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!

IT!

IS!

CANON!

AH-HAHAHAHAHA!

HOLY S**T! Holy s**t! Holy s**t...might just be the best way I could possibly describe this! Finally, after all the waiting, speculating, and praying, THESE TWO IDIOTS FINALLY GOT TOGETHER! AND IT WAS PERFECT! I mean, it was awkward as s**t, but that's what makes it perfect! You know why? You wanna--Hey! *snaps fingers*. You want to know why? It's because they're teenagers. Of f**king course, it's going to be awkward! This is their first relationship, so there will be a lot of missteps along the way. And that, in itself, brings me to the best (second best part?) thing about it happening in episode eight of the new seasons. Most endgame couples get together in the climax or even at the end of the series. But to have them get together this early on, means there will be quite a few episodes dedicated to showing them grow as a couple.

And better than that--EVEN F**KING BETTER THAN THAT--dozens of kids are going to see these two, a realistic depiction of young love that just so happens to involve two girls, and are going to learn once and for all that there is nothing wrong with being who they are. That fact alone is f**king incredible. Yes, it sucks that season three got cut short, and we'll have even less time with Luz and Amity, but knowing how many kids have felt seen today almost makes it worth it in the end.

And if I see one mother f**ker saying this was poorly paced, I might just hunt them down for SPORT...Sorry if that was an overreaction. I'M JUST SO HAPPY! Because they're happy! Look at them. Listen to them! It's so...GAH-HAHAHA!

“They’re adorable! And deserve all the happiness!”: You're darn right, Hooty! You're darn right.

King’s Father(?) Shows Up: What the--WHAT?! They're doing this now?! Here?! After everything else?

Oh, man. What could this mean? What dynamic changes will this cause in the main cast? How could the writers fit this in during the next two episodes? And what--

Hooty Eats the Letter: ...Pfffft--HAHAHAHA!

Oh, man...I should be mad, and I wouldn't blame others if they are...but that is too much of a brilliant f**k you that I can't help but appreciate it. Bravo writers. Bravo.

WHAT I DISLIKED

...Dislikes? Dislikes? You would honestly believe that after everything I witnessed in this episode, that I would have the gull to list anything wrong with it?!

HOW DARE YOU ASSUME THAT I WOULD BE SO CALLUS TO--Actually, I do kind of have an issue with the episode's title. It's just too much of an awkward mouthful for me to get behind. I understand that the writers wanted to sneak the K into the secret message, but were there really no other titles starting with K that they couldn't come up with?

But that's just a personal issue, and in no way do I think anybody else would feel the same way. Especially with how well-written everything else is anyway.

IN CONCLUSION

"Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door" (title aside) is another A+ episode. It was hilarious, heart-wrenching, and downright adorable while keeping me entertained with every minute. I'm sure there are some issues I was willing to ignore due to how expertly written everything else was, but why bother looking for the chinks in the armor when I could just enjoy a perfect episode for being so...perfect! Some of you might be willing to disagree with me, but to that, I say: Don't knock it till you've tried it.

(Now, if you don't excuse me, I'm going to go lie down. It's...It's been a day.)