#also dont worry i wont post anything here
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Lowkey once again having that feeling that I wish I would've successfully killed myself when I was younger... isn't that fun (/s). I just feel so scared and overwhelmed about the future, like I'm so uncertain of everything and I feel like a complete failure because nothing I tried before has worked out. And I know logically there's still time, but it feels like I should be better than this. I feel like I haven't really changed that much since being a teenager. I was scared and lonely then, and I'm scared and lonely now. What if I'm always like this and I never figure anything out, and I'm just always a failure. What if nothing ever works out. Fuck
#sorry for being annoying and venting on here so much i just dont know what else to do#also please dont worry about me i wont kill myself i promise. theres way too many things out there i still wanna experience#at the very least there's so many horror movies i still havent seen and im not dying until I've seen them all#and since there's always new ones to discover and to be released; i will be sticking around#so yeah i promise im not gonna do anything like that. i just get really overwhelmed a lot lately#bc i cant stop thinking about my current life and future and when i do my thoughts just spiral endlessly#and i feel terrible#anyway apologies again#vent post
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ughhhhhhh the Depression Miasma is settling in, I fear
#wanna do nothing but socially isolate myself#just Stop Talking To People#and like. drop out of dnd and anime nights with my college friends and stop playing in orchestra#i wont bc thats Bad For Me. but i am so tired. i havent like. had a fun dnd sesh in months. literally almost cried after last weeks#just bc its not fun#mulling over cutting off contact with another college friend (no one here dont worry) bc i havent had a pleasant talk with him in ages#again. i wont. bc thats bad for me and also hella mean. but god.#i am so tired and no rest does anything for me. i get flashes of really good times and then just Dont Enjoy Things for a while. its great#sorry i really am just venting here bc i dont have anywhere else to post it#i just. am so tired. i feel like I've stalled out even though i realistically haven't. i should be Doing Important Things.#and instead i just sit at the dinner table and yell about music to the two people in my family who will still listen.#it sucks and makes me sad. this sucks#ill be fine just. ughhhhhhhh
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ill be like I can totally make a lighthearted post mentioning a kink i have and i wont even freak abt it. and then i freak abt it
#its not even one of the ones i normally freak abt. fml. fml. its spreading. eventually i wont even be able to say Strals exist without going#into system shutdown or something. this sucks#this is also why i have so much trouble posting on my nsft is ill go over there and be like. Id love to **** some ***** and then i get#terrified. so i dont#my pfp over there is literally. **** ******* ** * *** but i go over there to post abt how i want to **** * *** and im like that is deviant#i cannot be saying that in front of my followers. who dollowed my nsft blog. where i list the things im into . and my pfo is * **** *******#** * *** so its not like theyd be HORRIFIED if that came up#but idk... i worry ppl dont read my dni over there. bc usually they just follow me after seeing that one post which doesnt rly mention any#of the ones im weird abt. except for like kind of it does but whatever its fine i cannottt freak out abt that post its existed for like.#months now. sigh. its all just a bit embarassing which sucks#“mdni”#IN A MASSIVE WAY. idr if any minors still r here if im still muts with any....#its just like. IDK i either feel a bit silly posting on it and its just mildly embarass Or i send myself into hysterics over how im an evil#person bc i like. well i cant say. obviously. but yk. stufffff. that i am into. I HATE TALKING ABT IT BC IT MAKES ME SOUND LIKE AN EVIL#PERSON AND LIKE. its not anything like. UGH. im not into kids or animals 👍👍👍 obviously. and idt its that bad the things im into some of#them r like basically baby shit like ohhh woww youre into *********** and yet even that i cant talk abt it bc im like um im going to be#smited by god and sent to hell or soemthing and actually i only thing its normal bc im a disgusting weird freak and everybody would kill me#immediately if they knew also im an evil person? its like. UGHHHH.#and the other stuff is. less 'mainstream' which is even scarier but ig in a way ive been More open abt it which is kind of funny. looks at.#but even then i dont rly go in detail bc yk. Stuff. im just like lol they r the way they r bc of how i am. and then i walk away forever#idk. ive been feeling so guilty over that specifically like. UGH. its not like. ugh. i rly cant talk abt it without it being obvious and im#scared byt im also like Compelled to talk abt it so ppl dont think its worse but im also compelled not to bc thats like oversharing i guess#as if thta isnt All i do on this fuckass blog. no matter what i do i lose. i hate my brain so badly i wish i could judt get over it and jus#be like yep these r the things and not have to like over clarify and explain and disclaimer everything and stuff . idk. it suck#mdni#the quotes didnt take it to the top like they used to. kms
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Fjdhfjfnfkfnfkfnck AAAAAAAAAAAAA stop breaking my heart!!!!!!! STOP!!!! I get it! They are inseparable! Do not separate them! They need each other!!!!! Stop reminding me! I can't take it anymore! Weiss have mercy!!!!
New lore???? It's been several months so I can't remember the exact details of the Dirge ending, but after defeating Omega that was it, that was the end of the game. Weiss did survive and was carried off by Genesis, but there was no hint of Nero. Either they're not taking the secret ending into consideration, cuz it never led anywhere cuz there was no more story after Dirge chronologically, or Weiss only remembers up to becoming Omega and thinks they succeeded.
#im also kinda sad he hasnt singled out vincent since he got his memories back. but i guess that was only hojo related maybe?#why would weiss himself care about anything vincent related ya know#i do wish we could get nero soon tho. i hate seeing the brothers apart 😭#i dont he'll come until after part 2 is released tho. well yuffie doesnt her memories of post 7 back and idk if they retroactively made 7r#canon so it's possible he could be added and then just never meet yuffie until it's relevant. i do suspect we'll see more deepground in#part 2 anyway. but im still worried he'll be saved for afterwards in which case he wont be the first released since no doubt itll finally be#red. and even then we might get sonon next before nero. ugggghhh i want all of them in the game but nero needs to be here for his big bro!!!#personal
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TIME TRAVELER AU PT 2
Original post/idea here. Part 1 is here. Part 3 is here.
Check out my MASTERLIST for more!
I fucked up.
You thought as you sat on the bed, holding your head in your hands.
I fucked up so baaaaaad.
Not only have you healed Baldwin of his leprosy, forever changing history of the LEPER KING, but also managed to somehow be his bride. To make matters EVEN worse, you cant just up and leave right now because you dont know the disastrous effects it'll have on the future now that Baldwin wont die of leprosy, which means that the kingdom of Jerusalem wont fall to Salauddin and his muslim army and after that its just a domino effect.
You tried to view your options here.
I stay here, marry Baldwin and fuck up the fabric of time and space because how can someone from the future marry someone from the past? Wouldnt I cease to exist?
I leave, return to my time where authorities arrest me for fucking around with time- that is, if I even exist in the future now that I've altered history. Who knows if my ancestors survived/were born after this?
No. Neither option is good. I need to stay here and fix this. But in a way that i dont draw too much attention to myself so that im so insignificant that nobody remembers, let alone writes about me in the history books.
You were drawn out of your thoughts with someone knocking on your door. "Come in." You said, straightening yourself.
A couple of servants walked in, all women. "Princess Y/n." They all courtesied. "We've been sent here by his majesty to prepare you for dinner with him."
Princess? Ah yes. Only a couple of hours ago, Baldwin had proposed to you, I guess the concept of asking wasnt a thing here as he just slipped on the big beautiful ring on your finger.
You narrowed your eyes at them. "First of all, Im not a princess. You will address me as Y/n only. And secondly, Im not going to join him for dinner, so there's no need to prepare me" The maids all shared a look of confusion before the head servant spoke.
"But we cant address you as anything else until you wed the king, after which you will be our queen, princess."
"Didnt I just tell you not to call me princess? Just call me Y/n!" The head maid shook her head. "Princess, we can not do that. If we do, then we would be punished. And we must prepare you for dinner with his majesty!" The maids moved ahead to start helping you but you raised a hand, halting them.
"I said, no." You said sternly.
"What... what will we tell the king, princess? He's expecting you-"
"Tell him i cant come because Im sic- no, Im not feeling well and Id like to be alone." You cant say "sick" in this era, because that means "death sentence" here and you dont want to be fretted over and bring attention to yourself as "the king's fiancee got SICK!". Besides, you do need to be away from Baldwin as much as possible and have some time to plot your moves.
-
You had pulled out your notebook and began writing out dates and historic events of this era to plan your escape. You're trying to find some sort of shortcut where Baldwin gets sick again and dies, leaving his kingdom in the hands of his sister and brother in law, who will bring its downfall-
Someone knocked on your door gently. "Princess?" You quickly hid your notebook. "Come in."
Baldwin walked inside and towards you, eyes worried as they scanned you up and down.
"I heard you're not feeling well?" He asked and before you had a chance to back away, he had cupped your cheeks in his hands tenderly. "What's wrong? Shall I fetch the royal physician?"
"No." You replied with your face smushed in his hands. "I'm fine." You pulled your face away his large hands.
Confusion spread through his blue orbs. "Then why did you not join me for dinner?" He asked, using a hand to push your hair over your ear, not taking the hint that you didn't want him touching you.
"I just-" what possible excuse could you come up with that would be both effective and not insulting enough to have your head chopped off. "you- you dont care about me."
Baldwin looked at you in bewilderment. "I dont... care about you? Princess, how can you say that?" He tried to cup your cheek again but you backed away before he could, putting on a face of hurt.
"How can I not? You dont care about what I want, or even ask me what I need?" You feingned pain in your voice, turning away from him for dramatic effect.
He grabbed your shoulders and turned you towards him, his pupils grew wide as if trying to search for what it is that you need. "My love, what do you want? Just say the word, and I'll give it to you."
You looked down, again for the theatrics, and Baldwin lifted your chin. "Go on."
"You never- never asked me to marry you."
"Huh? But I did today-"
"No, you stated it- demanded I marry you." You furrowed your brows and looked down again.
Baldwin smiled. Of course, how could he have not asked you? You were a girl after all, you want to be courted the traditional way. Its not your fault that you dont know that kings do not ask permission for things. They just get it, because who would refuse to marry a king?
He kissed your forehead, lifting your chin again to meet his eyes. "Im sorry, princess. I shouldve asked." He took your hands in his and had that charming smile again. "Will you marry me, Y/n?"
"No." You shook your head. "I... I cant marry you, your majesty." You said, adding tears into your eyes. His brows furrowed in concern.
"What? Why?" You tried pulling your hands away but he didnt let go, tightening his grip ever so slightly.
"I-" well, you could say that youre not catholic and the church would never let you two get married, but you also dont wanna be tortured for being a "heretic". Maybe religious differences could be the last plan. Taking your silence as hesitance, Baldwin spoke. "I can offer you everything and more. Jerusalem would be yours. What is it that I lack that anyone else could offer?"
"I am not a good match for you!" Ah yes, lets do the typical "its not you, its me." You bit your lip as you yanked your hands out of his and walked towards the window, your back to him (theatrics). "You and I are not equals- no we are nowhere close! Youre a king, your father was a king, your family is royalty. I come from nothing, as did my ancestors. There will never be stability in our marriage when we come from such different backgrounds!" You never thought that you would be putting yourself down and call yourself "inferior" to break up with a man.
Silence hung in the air, as you held your breath.
"Youre right." You heard him say behind you. "We are not equals, we never will be." For some reason, instead of being relieved, a chill ran down your spine. Baldwin wrapped his arms around you, resting his head on your shoulder. "I may be a king, but youre far superior to me. You're an angel, sent to me by God, and you saved me. I wouldnt be king anymore if you werent here, princess."
Warmth spread from your cheeks to the tip of your ears, both due to the close proximity and his words. Sensing your bashfulness, he chuckled, kissing your cheek as he turned you around to face him. You could hear your own heart beat at how close he was.
Baldwin tilted his head, half lidded eyes staring at you. "Youre everything and more that I could ask for, princess. Never put yourself down and compare yourself to me, hm?" He said, giving your arms a gentle squeeze before moving away, but not detaching himself completely as he took ahold of your hand and looked back at you.
"Now that this is settled, let us go eat. I've had the servants prepare a feast for us and then we can discuss wedding arrangements-" shit shit shit shit shit fuck it!
"I'm not catholic!" Baldwin halted at that. You've already said it, might as well dig yourself a deeper hole. You let the tears form in your eyes. "Im... Muslim. I didnt tell you because I didnt want you to think I was working for Salauddin and spying on you for him, you know I wasnt! I really did only want to know about you. Please believe me, I wasnt-"
"I believe you."
What? Just like that.
"You- you believe me?" You breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you. Once again, Im sorry i didnt tell you I was a Muslim, but dont worry, I'll pack my things and leave tonight-"
"Why? We still have to get married."
You blinked slowly. "But... Im Muslim?"
Baldwin shrugged. "So? It doesnt change anything."
You looked at him in bafflement. "It does! It changes everything! We cant get married! Im a Muslim! The church wont allow interfaith marriages, and I dont intend on converting to catholicism either if thats what youre suggesting!"
"I am not suggesting that. You can be a muslim if you want to, but we're still getting married." Baldwin stated matter of factly.
"The church wont allow it-"
"The church will do as I say. I am the head of the church. Besides-" He smiled.
"I dont remember angels having to prove themselves to be a catholic. You saved my life, you cured my incurable disease. As far as the church is concerned, youre a miracle sent to me by God. Youre the Chosen One!"
Is he... is he hearing himself? Can you try to convince him?
"But... but Jerusalem deserves a Catholic Queen-" you tried weakly, but he cupped your cheek and smiled gently at you.
"I am Jerusalem, Y/n. And I deserve you." Was all he said before pecking your forehead.
He tugged you along with him. "Now, we have to eat."
You dont want to eat. You want to stay behind and think of another strategy because clearly you cant talk yourself out of this wedding.
"I'm- I'm not hungry." You said, making him frown.
"How is that possible? You havent had anything since morning. I dont want you getting sick before the wedding." Baldwin continued to pull you along.
Does he not listen?
"I dont want to eat- I- dont feel like it." You said a bit harshly this time, hoping he'd take the hint.
And he did, finally stopping. He sighed and let go of your hand. "Okay. I suppose if you really dont want to, we can skip dinner tonight." Fucking finally. "Its just... I seem to have developed a habit of enjoying meals with you. And now that my leprosy is cured and I have no more diet restrictions, I just- I had the kitchen prepare some of my favourite dishes that I was able to enjoy before my disease disabled me."
You stared at him. Is he- is he trying to guilt trip you? Baldwin once told you that due to leprosy he had ulcers in his mouth, and he couldnt eat different types of food, and was only able to have bland, soft goo.
You looked away from his big sad eyes. He's not getting to you. You need to go back to your room, make yourself scarce, be far away from him as often as possible.
"You can still go and eat dinner alone."
With one hand, he cupped your cheek. "Princess, you know I cant eat until you eat too. But its okay, if you dont want to eat, then I wont too. I guess I'll just have the servants finish the chicken roast and oh-! They even made strawberry cream cake for dessert. But- maybe another day."
You looked into his eyes, those blue orbs that were filled with sadness, resembling a kid who was just told "no candy!"
Sighing, you held his hand. "Maybe I can have a few bites."
His face lit up. Ah, he knew you'd come around. "Lets go!"
-
The next day, youre helped by the maids to get ready for the day. Apparently, Sibylla wanted to meet you and discuss some things, and you suspect she wants to talk about the wedding preprations.
The maids had prepared your bath and were very insistent on washing you themselves but you made them all leave the bath chambers. Finally, they compromised when you told them that they could dress you up if they wait outside.
Setting your old clothes on the bed, you entered the bathroom and settled into the warm water. The essential oils and flower petals soothed your mind and body, and you finally had some desperately needed silence to hear your own thoughts.
Last night at dinner, Baldwin was very- well, "happy" would be an understatement to how he felt near you. And all those forehead kisses and skin contact doesnt go unnoticed by you either. You suppose that since he had leprosy, he never really had or was allowed to touch anyone else. But now that hes cured, all thanks to your dumb ass, he craves the physical intimacy.
You closed your eyes as you sank deeper into the warm water. Gosh, did I really have to give him the water? Had I not done that, he would still be ridden with lepro-
Your eyes snapped open. Thats it. You just have to make sure he never drank your water in the first place! Yes! You can go back in time and sure, its always dangerous to go back in the same time period more than once, but you really dont have any other option now, do you?
After half an hour, you finally exited the bathroom and the maids practically ushered you to sit in the chair as they finally, FINALLY got to dress up the future queen of Jerusalem and after a whole hour, they're finally done. And... well you look good. Your hair has been done nicely, and a delicate golden headpiece, almost like a elegant hair band sits on top of your head. They added some color to your cheeks and lips with crushed berries. As for your clothes, they dressed you in a dark blue tunic with loose, flowing sleeves. The tunic itself was made of silk, probably brought in from the Byzantine empire and was only available to the upperclass of this time.
"I am not wearing those!" You said when they opened the jewellery boxes. There were diamonds and other precious stones adorning the earrings and necklaces.
"But princess, you must wear these. It is royal protocol for the king's bride to be, and the future queen to wear the royal jewels." The head maid said. She doesnt know that you dont plan on sticking around and if you leave wearing these jewels, who knows what havoc would that cause?
"No. I dont want to wear them."
The maids shared a look of concern. "What?" You asked them.
"Its just... his majesty picked these out for you himself. He would be mad at us if you were not wearing these." One of the younger servants spoke as she fumbled with her fingers. Through the mirror, you looked at everyone's worried expression. You doubt that someone as calm and collected as Baldwin would lose his marbles over his fiancee not wearing jewellery.
"I dont think the king would be mad at you if I dont wear some jewellery. He isnt one to get angry that easily, you know?" You said chuckling, but it died when you saw them share the same concerned looks again. This time, you turned away from the mirror to look at them directly. "What? Go on, no secrets."
Another maid mustered up the courage to mumble. "Well- it's just- the king- I mean- his majesty is calm but um-" she paused to look at the other maids for help but they all avoided eye contact. "Out with it." You said a bit sternly.
"His majesty... gets... emotional- yes, emotional! When it comes to matters concerning you."
"Emotional? What do you mean? Speak clearly, no word will get out of this room, I promise." You spoke all while glaring at the other maids to make them silently comply to not tattle on their friend.
The maid bit her lip. "His majesty... gets mad when he thinks that you're not being treated well." You gave her a look to continue. "A few weeks back, while you were strolling out in the garden, his majesty reprimanded some of his knights for not escorting you. He asked them why they weren't guarding you?"
A few weeks back? It may have made some sense for Baldwin to be protective of his bride to be, but you two weren't engaged until yesterday. And before that, his relationship with you was barely platonic, more like a king-servant thing.
"Tell her about the kitchen incident too." Another maid whispered.
"What kitchen incident?"
"Um, 2 months ago, when the kitchen had prepared a feast for his majesty, he almost fired the entire kitchen staff for serving olives with the entree." You gave them a quizzical look. "Well, his majesty had told them that you can't eat olives and had told them not to include it in the palace's food. But it was a feast to celebrate his victory and the staff thought it'd be best to add olives because the king likes them."
Your eyes widened at that. He almost fired the kitchen staff because you said you can't eat olives? I mean, it's not like you're deathly allergic, you just didn't like how tart they were and when Baldwin saw you picking them out on your plate, all you could manage to blurt out was that you can't eat them. Perhaps, he thought you had diet restrictions like him.
You huffed. That still didnt warrant such a reaction from him. "That isn't nice. Don't worry, I'll talk to him."
The maid looked at you in horror. "No! I mean, his majesty would not like that we- um..." she tried to come up with appropriate words that wouldn't be insulting. Her scrunched up face as she thought hard made you giggle.
"Fine, fine. I won't say anything to him. You have my word." You said, smiling at them assuringly.
The head maid then held out the pearl necklace to you. You sighed and nodded, and they all cheered as they started picking out the jewels for you.
Its okay. You told yourself. I can always drop them somewhere before time travelling.
-
As soon as you were dressed, one of Sibylla's lady-in-waiting came to fetch you. She hurried you, saying something along the lines of "you must see princess Sibylla right away!" And you couldn't stop her from pulling you along, so time travelling will have to wait.
"Princess Sibylla needs to see you right away, princess!" The maid said as she pulled you towards a room. Knocking on it, the door swung open and you were met with the sight of different gowns hanging on dummies with maids tending to them, and right in the center of the room was Sibylla, practically jumping on her heels.
"Y/n!" She yelled out as she ran towards you and engulfed you in a hug before her lady in waiting, the same one standing beside you, cleared her throat. It caught Sibylla's attention who gasped softly before backing away and immeadiately giving you a courtesy. "I mean, princess Y/n." You gave a nasty look to the lady in waiting before shaking your head at an embarrassed Sibylla. "You don't need to courtesy to me, princess Sibylla."
She immeadiately beamed. "Of course I do! You're not going to be just my sister in law, you're also going to be Queen of Jerusalem! Of course i bow to you."
Me, a queen? Yeah, we'll see about that.
"Still, I consider us friends before anything else." You offerer her a small smile. "You called for me?"
"Oh? Oh, yes!" She immeadiately grabbed your hand and pulled you further into the room. "I didn't know what colours and material you preferred, so I ordered them to bring everything with the best seamstresses in kingdom!" She pointed at the seamstresses, who bowed to you.
"But... I don't need clothes. I already have a wardrobe." Your statement made Sibylla laugh as did a few of her hand maidens.
"Ahh, you're so naive!" Sibylla giggled. "That wardrobe doesn't exist anymore. You're a princess, soon to be queen, you need a royal wardrobe!" She said as she dragged her hand over one of the gowns, feeling the material. "And! You still have to select your bridal gown!"
For the next 3 hours, Sibylla had the maids show you different gowns and materials, even helping by giving her input as to what would suit you.
"I still like my old clothes, they're quite comfortable." You sighed. Designing your new wardrobe was not something that needed your urgent attention at the moment. You need to return to your room and get the time machine from your old dress and leave this era.
Sibylla nods. "I understand what you're going through. I still remember how they burned away my entire wardrobe when I married Guy. But I suppose its poetic in a way. Since you're starting a new life, so why not start one by getting new clothes!"
Wait.
"They burnt all your old clothes?" Sibylla nods. "Mmhmm! In a way, you're burning away your past! And starting a new-" You didn't stick around as you immeadiately rushed out of the room and made your way towards your own.
You can't- your old clothes has your time machine. If they burn it, you can't ever leave!
You burst into your room, looking at the empty spot on your bed where you'd left your clothes before going in the bath.
"No." The maids, they must've put it in your closet. You searched it, searched your entire room but to no avail.
A maid walked into your room, watching you tear apart the bedroom. "P-princess? May I help-"
"Where are my clothes?!" You walked upto her, the poor maid's fright apparently on her face. "WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES!?"
"They- they're burning it-"
"WHERE?!"
"The gardens!"
You ran out of your room, and made your way towards the royal gardens as fast as you could, but with how huge this palace was, getting there took a while. Not to mention when you did get to the gardens, you didn't spot anyone there, but you did notice the smell of something burning, which lead you to the back of the gardens, that was away from everyone's sight.
There you found them, two maids burning your clothes in a small bonfire.
"PUT IT OUT!" You yelled as you rushed towards them, startling them.
"Princess-" they began bowing.
"Didn't you hear me? PUT THE FIRE OUT!" They scrambled about trying to find some water, but of course, they didn't have it.
"I'll get it from the fountain!" The two maids ran to get a bucket of water for you, but it would be too late by the time they came. So when you spotted your old dress burning, you pulled it out with bare hands, not caring about burning yourself.
The dress was mostly burnt to ashes, while only few bits remained that were still on fire. You managed to wrangle out your time machine out of it, the small metal box that was burning hot and left marks on your skin as you tried to hold it.
But even from here, you could see the damage was done. The area that displayed the year had now completely melted off, as did some of the buttons.
No. No. No. No. No. NO!
You couldn't help but cry as reality began to set in. You're stuck here.... you're stuck here forever.
Heart wrenching sobs wracked your body as you tried to hold the hot metal machine in your hands, your skin burning as you tried. Even when the servants came and poured the water on the fire, you still kept on crying, clutching your machine to your chest, partly to conceal it, partly from helplessness.
The maids looked at each in worry as they tried to console you, tried to pacify you, lest you had them executed. But it didn't matter, you were inconsolable. While one of the maids sat by your side, trying to soothe you, the other one ran in to get help.
Moments later, when you were able to hide the machine in your clothes again, someone came up and touched your shoulder from behind.
"Y/n?" You looked up through your tears. It was Baldwin. For some reason, seeing him only made you cry harder as you finally realised that you were stuck here with him. That you fucked up permanently.
"Oh princess. What's wrong? Don't cry- shhh, I'm here." He pulled your body towards him, letting you sob into his chest heartbreakingly. Exhaustion, frustration and shock must have overtook your body, as you fainted in his arms.
"Princess? Y/n?" He tried waking you up before collecting you in his arms and rushing back into the castle.
-
Hours later, you woke up to find yourself back in your room, lying in your bed. Your eyes looked down at your hands which were now wrapped in bandages. They only served as a reminder of what youd lost- your time machine.
Tears welled up in your eyes again. Am I- am I really stuck here? You sniffled.
A hand came up to caress your cheek, startling you.
It was Baldwin. "Princess? Do you want to tell me what happened?" His soft tone made you even more sad, and you raised your bandaged hands to wipe your tears, but he caught your wrists and lowered them back gently, using his own hands to wipe away the tears.
"No, you cant use your hands for sometime. The burns need to heal." His hand remained on your cheek, thumb caressing the area under your eye. "What happened, Y/n? Why were you so upset?"
You cant avoid the topic for long, and now that your way of escape is gone, you need to be careful of what you say and how you act around the king.
You let out a shaky breath. "They... they burned my clothes."
"Mmhm. Dont worry, I will have them bring in the fanciest clothes for you. Sibylla will make sure of it. Only the best for my princess." You shook your head. "Its not- its not that... They were my clothes... they burned away-"
"I know... but its a tradition. The maids burn away the bride-to-be's old clothes to signify that youre detaching yourself from the past and starting a new life." He explained, watching as you sniffled. Clearly, you were still upset over this.
"But the maids, they still should've informed you of this tradition before doing anything. I know how emotional of a transition this could be for girls." You nodded sadly, heart still sinking at the loss of your machine. "Dont worry though, they will be punished harshly for it. I have them in the dungeons tonight, and tomorrow-"
"What? Punished? No!" You cut him off. You dont want anyone to die because of you, especially when you dont know if anyone these people could potentially be an ancestor of yours.
"But they caused you harm. You burned yourself due to their-"
"No, no. Please, don't punish anyone- I- it was my fault for not knowing about royal traditions! Please, your Majesty, I beg you- don't do this- i- i-" You pleaded.
"Shhh, okay. Okay. I won't punish them for it." He patted your hair. "On one condition."
You looked at him in confusion.
"You call me Baldwin from now on." He grinned. "We are to be husband and wife soon, I don't want us to use royal titles with each other."
Your eyes widened. Is he- is he really giving up titles? You're not that blind to see his attempts at intimacy, but what you don't understand is why or even how you came to be on the receiving end of it.
What exactly is it about you that has made him want to marry you? Surely, Baldwin would've preferred to marry someone of this era, someone who is more compatible with him. Despite you trying to blend in the past months, you allowed Baldwin to see how you're not... as Conservative as most people of this time period are. One could say that he may be impressed by how intelligent you are than others, but it also brings up the factor of being "threatened" or "insulted" by the same intelligence.
Even though you consider beauty to be a "subjective" thing, the whole "beauty is in the eye of the beholder", you're not blind to how attractive others are. So why not them?
Did he only like you because you're intriguing? Does he still think you're a spy? Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer?
Probably. Or maybe he really does believe all that mumbo jumbo about you being "an angel sent to save him."
"As you wish... Baldwin."
-
Last night, after Baldwin had left you to rest, you stayed up and tried to figure out if you can fix your time machine, and if not, then can you built another one?
Fucking hell. You closed your eyes. I made it once, I can build it again. But it's easier said than done.
Back in the present, you had the technology to build it. Now? You have to first make the technology and the tools from scratch before you could even get on making your time machine, all while keeping your science project discrete, which was easier before because you weren't going to be married to a fucking King!
Right now, you're sitting in Baldwin's private dining room (yes, there are more than one dining room. He's royalty, what did you expect) having breakfast- well, being fed breakfast.
"You really don't need to do this." You said as Baldwin fed you another spoonful. He smiled as he wiped your lips with a napkin. "I don't need to, I want to. Besides, I don't want my princess starving."
Involuntary, your face flushed. "I- the maids could've fed me. And im not a princess." He frowned slightly. "Why would you- open wide, princess- why would you want the maids to feed you when you have me?" He pushed the spoon to your face as you parted your lips, but then he pulled it away and brought his face close to yours. "Do I make you nervous?"
You backed away immediately. "I- no- I mean-"
He burst out laughing. "I'm- I'm sorry princess, but you are just too endearing!" Baldwin chuckled as he grabbed the spoon again and fed you.
Your cheeks reddened, this time more out anger than embarrassment. "I don't want to eat anymore." You muttered, turning your face away.
He smiled as he brought the spoon to your lips again. "Ah ah, but you still haven't had enough." However, you rejected again, looking away instead of replying.
He sighed, placing the spoon back on the plate. "I'm sorry, princess. I shouldn't have laughed at you."
"You shouldn't have." You mumbled, face still turned away from him.
His lips quirked up a bit. "You know, for someone who insists that she's not a princess-" He turned your face to him gently. "- you sure have all the blandishment of one."
"Blandishment?"
"Flattering actions of a princess." He nodded.
You frowned. "Are you calling me a spoiled princess? A brat?"
"I would never!" Baldwin gasped. "I enjoy you acting like royalty, demanding respect and attention. You deserve it and more. Besides-" He picked up some food on the spoon again and brought it to your lips. "Even if if you were a spoiled, bratty princess, I wouldn't mind. I would enjoy spoiling you, hm?" He nudged the spoon to your lips softly.
You parted your lips, making him smile. It really is hard to stay mad at him when he looks at you with his baby blue eyes. They just- they draw you in.
"Also, before I forget, I will be leaving the castle today to meet Salauddin. So you can either hand out with Sibylla, who still wants to help you design your wedding gown, or your can-"
Salauddin? "Why are you meeting Salauddin? Isn't he your enemy?"
He chuckled. "Only on the battlefield. He and I have developed a friendship, or a mutual respect over the years. As to why I'm going to meet him, is... well, you."
"Me?" He nodded. "Since you told me that you're a Muslim, I thought that we could perhaps have a discreet Islamic wedding- what is it called? Nikkah? So, I could go and learn more about it from Salauddin."
You opened your mouth to protest. You don't need to be part of history as the "king of Jerusalem's Muslim wife" or "the Muslim-Christian wedding that took place during the Crusades", even if it might make the world more progressive.
But then, you didn't protest. "Can I come?"
Baldwin raised a brow at you. "You want to meet Salauddin?" You shook you're head. "Well, no, not really. I mean, I don't mind meeting him, but I just want to get out of the castle for a bit. It's been months since i left this place, I just want to get some fresh air." This could be the perfect opportunity for you, because if memory serves you right, Muslims of this era had made significant advances in science. Maybe you can use their help to get some tools to make the time machine again.
Baldwin looked unsure. "I don't know if it would be safe for you-" you held his hand with your bandaged ones. "Please, Baldwin? Can't you take me with you? And wouldn't I be the most safe when I'm with you?" Ah yes, stroke the male ego.
Finally, he smiled.
"Alright. I supposed it would be fine, after all, you should see the kingdom you're going to be the queen of."
Thoughts? (Also, I need to go shower rn, so I'll put the read more later. Doing so much effort for u guys, my spoiled greedy children)
Part 3 is here.
#yandere baldwin#yandere king baldwin#male yandere#yandere male#yandere x reader#yandere x#yandere x darling#yandere#baldwin iv
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hey guys! in my previous post, i said that if you needed to vent, you could do so in my asks and I read every single one of the asks and to be honest, I was so teary eyed. everyone's stories were so heartbreaking and their feelings were so raw and genuine and honestly, it reminded me a lot of my old situation and how much i struggled and it made me want to do something, which is why I'm making this post.
this is going to be a 3 day challenge to improve your void concept so you can really get into the void! read through it and modify it how it best suits you. also, a lot of this was taken from my anon's success stories so trust me, you will succeed.
day 1: choose a subliminal for the void state and you're going to listen to it as much as you can for the entire day. a lot of my anons succeeded with this one, this one, and this one and if you're in a position where you just can't listen to any sounds, use this silent field. if you just can't listen to subliminals, then do this exercise how many ever times you want. (yes, you can do the exercise and listen to subliminals).
basically take this day as a subconcious repgramming day, don't worry about anything else. try staying off tumblr and just doing fun stuff and if you really are addicted to tumblr/void, then read all my proof portfolio links. but basically all you're doing this day is letting the affirmations sink into your brain so that your subconcious beliefs are aligned with the 3d you are trying to create.
that night, i want you to do this shifting hypnosis video (no you wont shift if you dont want to) and basically after she finishes talking, affirm your void concept affirmations (the void is easy, i always wake up in the void, etc ) over and over. you might actually end up entering the void or waking up in the void from this alone but even not, it takes you a pretty deep meditative state where you can really reprogram your subconcious mind.
day 2: this day you're going to be repeating day 1's activities except instead of the shifting hypnosis (unless you really ended up liking it), anytime you want, you're going to do this instant manifestation portal meditation, because it just feels so good and works so well so honestly, don't be shocked if you end up waking up in the void this day.
day 3: this day repeat whatever it is that made you feel good from the 2 previous days and then that night, do this parallel reality meditation. it's basically just a meditation to put you into your ideal state but they worded it as shifting to a parallel reality in which you exist as your ideal state but yeah, it's just a powerful tool to help you enter a state of having your ideal void concept and always entering the void easily. honestly if you don't want to do the entire challenge but want just one powerful thing to do, i recommend this. just try it out and trust me, you won't regret it.
i feel like this challenge comes off as a lot but it's just because i explain too much. here's a simplified version:
day 1: listen to sub or do reprogramming exercise and then at night, do hypnosis video
day 2: listen to sub or do reprogramming exercise and then do instant manifestation portal mediation (yes you can do hypnosis video again if you want)
day 3: listen to sub or do reprogramming exercise and then do parallel reality meditation (basically meditation to enter ideal state)
anyways, don't be shocked if you commit to the challenge and end up not being able to finish it because you already entered the void before the 3 days are up and if you do successfully complete it, your void concept is going to be so good and you already know you're going to enter the void so easily.
i really hope all of you do this or atleast your own version of it and i really wish the best for everyone 💗
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Our Song II
M.stuniolo
What happens when Y/N cant afford to fly out to LA… Y/N and Matt text for the first time…
THIS IS MY WORK AND MY IDEA! PLEASE DONT USE THIS AS “INSPIRATION” OR TAKE IT WITHOUT GETTING MY PERMISSION FIRST! thank you :)
This is part two of our song! Find the mood board and part one through my master list!
Y/N POV
You and Nick have been texting back and forth for a few days at this point and your excitement for the collab has grown even more, if that is possible. You’ve been looking at hotels and plane tickets, trying to see how they would fit into your budget. You can't seem to find any plane tickets that are less than $250, so you decide to text Nick to see if they could collab next time they are back in Boston, that being a cheaper flight from Jersey.
“I can't find a cheap flight to fit into my budget, do you think we could collab next time the three of you are in Boston? It would be a cheaper flight for me to book…” You send Nick the text with a small sigh, not sure when the next time they will be home or if they will even want to collab with you when they are.
Your phone is quick to ping again, it was Nick texting you back, “girl don’t worry about anything! We’ll cover it for you, we wanted you to come out to LA so we don’t expect you to cover everything… We will book you a nice hotel near our house and get you a good plane ticket!” You read Nick's text with a large smile, they really didn’t have to do any of that, but it was nice that they are. Them paying to fly you out would help you out, leaving you with extra money to spend while in LA.
You're quick to shoot a text back to him, saying everything along the lines of “thank you so much” and “I really appreciate that” and “it means so much to me!” Because it really did, they didn’t know and probably wont ever know how much this means so you, you saying thank you will never be enough.
Matts POV
“She’s saying she can't afford a flight and hotel out here…” Nick says as he reads the text out loud, to Matt and Chris, that you sent him. Matt looks between his two brothers before an idea pops into his head.
”Tell her we will cover it,” Matt is quick to say. “Just take it out of my account, I was the one who wanted to collab with her in the first place.�� He explains to his brothers before they can even say anything.
“Okay,” Nick says, slightly suspicious of his one brothers need to have you here. Nick was quick to catch onto Matt’s fond interest with you, seemingly always catching him looking at your new insta post or scrolling through your TikTok or watching an edit of you on there. Nick often hears your voice coming from Matt’s room, assuming Matt is watching one of your YouTube videos-one that he’s probably seen nine times already but still watches it because it is his favorite video of you.
After a beat of silence Matt speaks up again, “I just think it would be nice, since we are the ones who want to collab and have her come out here.” explaining his idea more, even though neither Nick nor Chris asked anything about why he was wanting to pay. “Could you do me a favor though, and not tell her I’m the only one paying for it?” Matt asks Nick with a shy smile.
Matt didn’t want you to know he was the sole reason they wanted to collab with you, being slightly embarrassed about how excited he is to meet you for the first time. He also didn’t want you to know he was paying for your whole trip, not wanting you to feel bad for only him spending so much money on you.
“Do you think you could give me her number? So then I can let her know what the car looks like and what number to expect when we go to pick her up,” Nick is quick to give Matt a small nod and even smaller smirk, knowing the exact reason he is asking for your number, but Nick didn’t wanna ruin Matt’s fun so he sent him your number.
Three days later…
Your phone pings with a random number but the message doesn’t concern you, it actually makes your stomach twist in excitement. The text reads, “Hey Y/N, it’s Matt Sturniolo. Nick gave me your number so then I can text you when we come to pick you up from the airport, or so we can just talk and get to know each other a little better before you fly here”
“Matthew Sturniolo wants to get to know me!” You say quietly to yourself, your heart pounding as you read the text over and over again. You’ve always liked Matt the most, thinking he was the best looking, the one you related to the most out of the three of them, and overall someone you genuinely wanted to meet and see what they are like in person.
With a big grin and shaking fingers you text him back, “Hi Matt, I would love to get to know you some more before flying out. Thanks for texting me, and know that I’m always open to talk and all!” You hit send on the text and send your phone flying across your bed with a small squeal. A few small giggles leave your lips as you think about what just happened. The Matthew Sturniolo just text you, wanting to get to know you.
But what you didn’t know is that your text did the same thing to him. Making his stomach twirl in excitement as he read over your words. The same small giggles leaving his lips as he blushes and smiles at the words, “I would love to get to know you…” on his screen.
AN: i hoped you enjoyed this part! The next part is Y/N flying out to la and meeting the triplets for the first time!! And texting Matt some more🤭
Any interaction is welcomed and very much appreciated
All borders from @issysh3ll
#christopher sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo imagine#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo smut#sturniolo#the sturniolo triplets#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo smut#**^oursong
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HI there, hate to bother you but i was wondering if you could do the amazing digital circus head canons for a gn! reader who acts a lot like ena
if you have never heard of it you can check on the ena wiki but i would really love if you did something like this so thanks
TADC x ENA type!GN!reader
typically i would do all the characters in one post, but its starting to get late and tumblr wont let me save half answered asks in my drafts for some reason TToTT so im gonna split the cast in half, if you want the rest of the characters you can send in a second ask so i can remember to do everyone else :0! also my apolocheese for any personality mistakes, i think i watched ena a long time ago but was confused/didnt watch the whole thing so uh uh!! relying on a character wiki for this (on that focuses on season 1 so uh uh, idk if that will impact anything) little bonus bonus incorporating enas color thing into this cuz uh we can say its digital world stuff ooo that gives me an oc idea; oc whos like the mayor from nightmare before christmas who has a spinny head/face thing that relates to their emotions
CAINE:
caines is going to be shorter because hes just your number one fan regardless of your personality, in fact he probably has a silly shirt with your face on it somewhere
will do everything in his power to make sure youre happy and content, and will do everything to cheer you up when you switch over to your sad side
takes you to wherever it is that he 'sleeps' when you get overwhelmed by stuff and keeps you there until both of you are sure that youll be okay and your blues are long gone
you and him easily match energies, sometimes he will even try to one up you with using fancy intricate words
POMNI:
writing pomnis part first but oh funny is it that pomni and ena have the same VA
anyways
absolutely loves you, but she is so so worried about stressing you out and switching to your 'sad form', tries to (often times unsuccessfully) cheer you up
honestly you both need a break, things in the circus are hectic and insane, and considering pomni just got here she is going to need your help to get used to things
not much to be said since i think pomni is another character i struggle to write
JAX:
initially teases you for how fast you switch up, its almost like gangle being more upbeat with her comedy mask and more sad when its broken
tones it down a little when you explain you cant really control it whereas gangles case is just her being more confident with the comedy mask (at least thats my hc)
sometimes give you weird looks when you use an unnecessarily long set of fancy words to describe something mundane
bro is fighting the urge to mimic it
surprisingly does the kind thing, he takes you off to the side when something stresses you out so you can have a minute to compose yourself
RAGATHA:
optimistic sweetheart meets ray of sunshine, you two are an unstoppable force of good and kind of rub off on some of the others
similar to jax when you get stressed out or upset about something, usually when its an in house adventure, she sweeps you to the side and helps calm you down. she probably knows some breathing techniques, i think
ignoring the fact they probably dont need to breathe but thats asides the poin
#tadc x reader#the amazing digital circus x reader#digital circus x reader#caine x reader#jax x reader#pomni x reader#ragatha x reader
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when this posts, the queue has ran out!!
thank you so much for being here with me on this little daily-art journey (LMAO). this was all the tmnt art ive drawn (and posted on twitter) since the rottmnt movie came out august 2022, and i'm so grateful for all the support i've gotten here on tumblr!
I STILL DRAW DONT WORRY!!
but of course from now on i will post art gradually whenever i draw, not daily!
throughout as the queue progressed i also put the art i drew in the queue, so the past few ones have been recent i know alot of you found comfort in the daily posting so im really sorry it had to end, i also enjoyed the daily feedback and seeing your happiness!
it feels a bit surreal in a way, i know it hasnt been that long but also it was about 3 months of daily posts which is a bit weird to just stop suddenly,,, but anyway!
art for me is hard alot of the time, my artstyle seems rly simple and not hard to do to others but for me i have very low wrist stamina and alot going on in my personal life currently so im unsure on just how often i will post. i hope you will respect this!!
i still draw, i will post it whenever its drawn! and my ask box will ofc be open and i will answer the asks i am able to/feel like/have anything to answer them with! so just you know nothing is necessarily ending, it just wont be daily! hehe!
thank you so much!! see you soon!!
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my disappearance ♡
hiii this is cynthia most commonly known as gentlehue/jgracie/irlangelics <3 i wasnt gonna make a post like this for reasons i'll go thru under the cut but after having three of you reach out to me on pinterest i thought it'd be unfair to leave everyone in the dark 💗 tagging @luvusrry @findmeonvenus / @daystarpoet and @bloodwrittenletters thank u for checking up on me lovelies xx
okay so the main reason i deactivated yesterday was because i realised being on here was negatively impacting my productivity LOL as you all probably know (because i never shut up about it) im in my second to last year of high school and everything i do now and next year is what has the largest impact on what uni i get into which then has a pretty big impact on where i end up in the future basically LMAO 😭 my life is so busy these days between doing the whole ib itself which im still getting used to since the british system is so structured and tells you exactly what to do in comparison to ib where a lot of it is you doing your own thing & prepping for uni by researching diff courses and the lnat which is an exam i'll have to sit in order to apply to study law & also getting back into all my extracurricular/picking up new ones which is another thing i have to get used to since im SUCH an academically oriented person & a BUNCHHH of other things i wont be getting into rn 😭 and so i cannot afford to be lounging around in any way whatsoever right now!! this is the socmed app i spend the most time on and i tend to tell myself its ok cause im not replying to notifs im just scrolling which is so silly LOL but i need to eliminate that from my life soooo i left
a mini second reason why i left is smth thats gonna be rly hard for me to explain here & im pretty sure probs has smth to do w my ocd (another thing i dont rly like to talk ab that much so idk how many of u know this) but i have this thing where if something negatively impacts me or like if i have a negative association w it it becomes "imperfect" and i acc cannot have it around me like it physically disgusts me and i cant function or think or anything 😭 and thats what was happening w my tumblr account because of how it caused me soooo much procrastination and so little work done 😣 soz if this doesnt make any sense or if its weird but its smth ive had for years now and am slowly working on 😭 my perfectionism is so horrible too and tumblr makes it worse cause im always overthinking what my feed looks like 😫 like i cant have too many talking posts or too many asks or too many reblogs and im always doing them in a way that balances it out in my head and i spiral so bad over it 🙁
ANOTHER reason (wow lots of reasons) is cause ive begun to enjoy my real life so so much these days and dont want to be distracted by being online 😭 i love my friend group i love sixth form i love having a crush i love it all! a lot of my friends r graduating this year as well and so i probs wont be seeing them as often afterwards cause obvs theyre not all applying to unis in our city let alone our country !!! i dont wanna take this year for granted at ALL cause i'll so regret it if i do :(
the second thing im addressing is why i left w out saying anything LOL basically i knew if i posted smth and said my goodbyes i wouldn't commit to it at all 😭 and i need to seriously be disciplined w myself these days if i wanna be rich and traveling the world in 10 years 🫡
i dont know if i'll ever come back but im so so happy i got to know u all whether u knew me from jgracie or discovered me later on after i abandoned her im so glad i got to call u my lovely friends :) i carry a piece of you all wherever i go ♡ you know you'll always know me! i wont deactivate this account but i wont be active on it either unless i decide to fully come back, but if u send me an ask within this week i'll answer it xx
for those of you who are worried about my fics on jgracie, i made a backup account back in the summer and everything ive ever written is reblogged over there :) @cynarchives
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honestly im tired of ppl only lieking lizzie bc of her skill in the book of atlantic . im tired of " lizzie supportive " posts that basically boil down to " i know she may SEEM liek some stupid awful girly girl , but look , theres a part where shes bloody !! what a badass !! "
the book of atlantic arc definitely gave her character some more depth , i understand that some ppl may have lieked her moar once they got some insight into tha things she was dealing with . but it feels liek im expected to liek her in SPITE of her girliness . or rather , liek im only allowed to liek how cutesy and girly she is because , " dont worry , shes ALSO a fencer !! dont worry , she was really cool n fought zombies liek a badass !! "
ive been in tha fandom since liek 5th grade ( i dont remember what year that was , but im 24 now , to put things in perspective . ive been here for a while , i know what tha fandom has been liek ) . to be fair ive interacted w tha fandom on and off over tha years , but it rlly seems liek tha attitude has shifted from :
before boa : ew lizzie is so annoying i hate her shes just a stupid pink girly girl that gets in tha way of everything , ciel definitely hates her hahaha !! eew she sucks !!
after boa : aaaah omg lizzie is so wonderful shes such a badass , omg she looks cute AND can use a sword , slay queen !! give us girls who are feminine AND kick ass 😎
okay .. what abt girls that are just feminine tho ... why did she have to showcase her fencing skills and defend ciel from zombies to be allowed to be cutesy . why was she considered super annoying and awful before boa , but now its liek we can " let that part of her slide " bc we know what shes capable of on tha inside . its tha misogyny innit .
idk . i know how rancid this fandom was wen i was a kid , which is why i distanced myself from it in tha first place . so really i should be happy that lizzie is finally getting some love , that things are changing for tha better , and that tha fandom is looking liek a better and better place . but it still bothers me that ppl only support this idea of lizzie as a cute badass . that when she was only known as a girly girl , everyone hated her . for what .. ? she never did anything to deserve so much hate , unless you count being a cutesy 13-14 year old girl a crime . but now that shes displayed that shes capable of violence , tha tone has shifted into loving her . okay .
idk . ranty post is moar of a diary / journal entry lol . and again i understand ppl who werent fans of her bc she didnt have much depth turning around and lieking her moar bc of how tha manga went into her struggles as a person . but tha ppl who hated her for being " annoying " suddenly kissing her ass bc she got to use her fencing skills and now they wont shut up about it ,, buzz off . can you appreciate something else about her please . shes kind and cheerful and cute and hardworking but all i ever hear is " wow , girls can wear dresses and fight at tha saem tiem !! "
#this post has been in my drafts for so long i had to change the age i said i was lol#im 24 now#lol#elizabeth midford#lizzie#kuroshitsuji#black butler#kuroshit#sure ill put this in the main tags . sure ill be flamed alive#oh wait should i tag this fir spoilers#spoilers#kuroshitsuji spoilers#black butler spoilers
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The HOMOE Masterpost
Shoutout to @butchbarneygumble for oking me to steal this idea from their Moeney Masterpost! Go peep that btw.
I see almost no one acknowledge all the gay shit these two have going on so i have to ship them all by myself and honestly that's unacceptable given how much this show implies between them. And with a ship name like Homoe? You have got to be kidding me they were handed to me on a golden fucking plater.
Blah blah i know these are jokes or w/e but its a show, no one here is real, you are not affected by me wanting these middle aged men to kiss each other (more than they already do) so lets get on with it!
This is currently only clips from the show, i will go through the comics/books/etc. if anything's hidden in there and ill add it to this post in the future.
This is gonna be a long post so everything is gonna be under the cut.
Episode: (S2E11) One Fish, Two Fish, Blow Fish, Blue Fish
Homer Kisses Moe. Moe responds with "not in public". So in private then?
H: Oh words wont do it- I love you Moe M: Not in public
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Episode: (S8E3) The Homer they Fall
Just this whole episode.
H: Are you an angel? M: Yes Homer, Im an angel. All us angles wear Farah slacks. H: But you stopped the fight. Wont everyone be mad at you? M: Eh, lettem be mad. The only thing that matters to me is your'e safe. - D: Homer, your manager obviously loves you very much.
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Episode: (S9E16) Dumbbell Indemnity
Dancing together + hints throughout. "if you squint" kinda stuff but ill take my breadcrumbs.
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Episode: (S11E6) Hello Gutter Hello Fadder
Homer and Moe consider one another life partners.
Ma: Well, the one sure cure for the blues is to talk it over with your life partner. H: You're right! - H: I cant believe it Moe. The greatest feet of my life is already forgotten. M: Geez, Homer. I never seen ya this depressed. As your life partner, Im very worried.
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Episode: (S11E10) Little Big Mom
When Lisa calls the tavern, Moe asks if Homer is going to another bar like its a cheating situation. Look at me however you want that's how im taking this. Moe's clingy.
M: Hey uh- is Homer there? L: No, he isn't. I dont know where he is. M: Im a little worried. He usually stops in for an eye opener on the way to work. L: He told us he'd been going to the gym. M: Uhahaha- Wow. Anyway, you dont think he could be at another bar do ya? Because i couldnt take that- i- i just couldnt. *crying*
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Episode: (S11E16) Pygmoelian
Homer tells Moe his acting is a turn on.
M: The one hole ive never been able to fix is the one in my soul. H: That was amazing Moe. Im actually a little turned on. M: Yeah, hey i gotta gift.
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Episode: (S16E7) Mommie Beerest
The thing i dont say is that i primarily ship all three of them together especially during late seasons. Reading "Moe takes the place of marge" jokes as shippy is- a bit of a stretch? whatever, it includes Moe telling Homer "i love you" and Homer calling Moe "Honey".
H: What would Marge say? M: Do whatever you have to do to save Moe's. I love my Homie. H: Ok honey, ill do it! Ma: What's going on here? M: Nothin- Nothing.
Also Homer and Moe sharing a bed 1/2.
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Episode: (S17E5) Marge's Son Poisoning
If i had a nickel for every time Moe and Homer were called life partners id have 2 nickels. Which isn't a lot but its weird that it happened twice. (This has to be a lie, im certain there is a third time this has happened, i have yet to find it again) "They're lying, they're trying to hustle" um stfu- idc that's his life partner. he said so.
RT: God dern it son- what tha hell kinna sissy are you? M: Hey are you calling my life partner a sissy? Cause a hundred bucks says he could whoop you in arm wrestling.
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Episode: (S18E6: Moe n' a Lisa)
Moe tells Homer he loves him.
H: Seriously Moe, I think you have a gift. M: Thanks Homer, I love you man. H: OoooOH you love a man.
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Episode: (S20E8) The Burns and The Bees
Moe explains bees having sex to Homer and Homer thinks Moe is talking about the two of them.
H: But how are we supposed to combine the DNA of two strains of the same species? M: Actually Homer *whispering* H: *gasp* You and me? M: No. The bees. H: Oh! Yeah yeah. That's what i meant too. I... have no... inclination...
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Episode: (S21E30 The Great Wife Hope)
Moe takes Homer dressed as Marge to his class reunion. He says he took Barney the year before.
M: Lets go Marge. My class reunion starts in an hour. H: Uh, Moe, i have a confession to make. Im just Homer dressed as Marge. M: Yeah, but last year i took Barney dressed as Marge. Think how much better they'll think you look. Hmm? H: Well you better not leave me and talk to your old friends all night. M: Keep talkin like that and ill leave ya here right now.
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Episode: (S21E21) Moe Letter Blues
Homer kisses Moe.
H: Moe, i dont know rather to punch you or kiss you. So im gonna do both.
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Episode: (S24E2) Treehouse of Horror XXIV
Look, i know its a demon that looks like Moe and NOT Moe. But cmon what was this???
H: Listen, pal, you seem like an honest guy. Is there any other deal you can accept? D: Three way. H: Hm- You, me, Marge? D: Demon, demon, you. H: Sigh- I guess its one of those things a dad has to do. - H: Now before we start, what's the safe word? D: Cinnamon H: Oh! I like that. Now, id like to try something new, if you dont mind. D: Cinnamon. Cinnamon! Cinnamon! Cinnamon!
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Episode: (S25E12) Diggs
Ok- so the way Bart describes his feeling for Diggs is really queer and Homer immediately compares that to his feelings towards Moe.
B: I met this kid. Little older. Kinda strange. I dont think other people get him but i just wanna hang out with him all the time. H: *gasps* Its even better than i thought. You found your Moe Szyslak!
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Episode: (S27E10) The Girl Code
Homer kisses Moe.
M: Hey what tha hell? Get your kisser off my head puss! H: What? Its how greek men say 'hello'. Non sexual guy kissing is the best.
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Episode: (S28E4) Treehouse of Horror XXVII
Moe kisses a picture of Homer twice.
Thanks @leibi97 for remembering this one for me!
--- Episode: (S28E13) Fatzcarraldo
Homer calls Moe his "sweet wonderful bartender"
H: i had a great day and i really wanna celebrate with the boys so dont wait up for me my sweet wonderful bartender, Moe. M: Alright but whos the boys? H: Marge's boobs. See ya!
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Episode: (S29E16) King Leer
Homer carrying Moe into the store. But also i like this episode over all from a Homoearge standpoint.
M: When i cross this threshold i begin a new life! *Picked up by Homer* This is the first time that ive ever been carried into a store. Look at me now lady foot locker! Look at me now.
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Episode: (S32E15) Do Pizza Robots Dream of Electric Guitars
Ok guys THIS is what im talking about when i say in later seasons i kinda ship all three of them.
Ma: Did you see how he ate his breakfast? He doesn't shuffle his pancakes like a deck of cards. He doesn't air drum while driving, or race the dog in butt scooting across the carpet. And he always won. He's not my Homie anymore. B: We didnt notice any of that. Ma: A wife knows. M: And a bartender. Hes just- hes just not the same. He dont spin Barney around on the stool no more. He dont drink beer from a crazy straw just a sensible straw. What are we gonna do about our little man Midge? Ma: Were just gonna have to love him that much more. M: I didnt think that was possible. - B: Im used to seeing mom upset about dad, but Moe. That really shook me.
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Episode: (S35E7) Its A Blunderful Life
They love each other :)
M: How dare you show your face in here. H: Moe, its me, and beneith all the drinking and the jokes we have a real relationship. And that means something. M: What are you gettin at? H: C'mon man. Deep down, we kinda love each other. H: *thrown through window* M: Love you too
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Episode: (S35E15) Cremains of the Day
Moe and Homer share a bed 2/2.
M: Oh cmon Lenny, ghosts aint real. eh
Holding each other.
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Episode: (S35E17) The Tipping Point
Dont- Even- Get- Me- Started
M: Exact change huh? Thats it? H: Aw, i really wanna tip ya Moe, but i promised my wife id quit. M: Heres a thought Homer. What if you took the moolah outta your pocket but you just stopped before anything happened? Ya know, everything but the tip. H: That dosent seem like it could lead to anything. M: Sure it couldnt. H: *slowly hands Moe ten dollars* H: We shouldnta done that. M: Does that mean- that you wanna stop? H: No *hands Moe more money* *moaning* It feels so good *hands Moe more money* M: Dont stop you generous man *handed more money* *moaning* Aw yeah give it to me big boy H: *handing Moe more money* You like that? M: Oh thats the spot H: I can do this all night M: Right there H: Tell me you want it M: Oh god- Oh god- Oh god- Oh god! H: Yes- Yes- Yes- Yes! *Wallet sprays money on Moe* C: I need a new bar. - M: *following Homer out of the bar* Where ya goin? H: I cant stop tippin Moe. Im hooked on tha rush! I gotta monkey on my back and hes got his hand out. M: But, what about us? H: No one service worker can satisfy my needs. God help me im a tip-phomaniac.
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Jesus ok i dont know how to conclude this post. I will make updates to this. I know im missing stuff.
This is about a 3rd of my "moe is bi" list so maybe ill make that its own masterpost.
Someone asked me today what ship dynamic they are and i told them "the dumb one/the evil one/the woman". My spouse and i have been watching Futurama and they pointed out to me it was the same dynamic when i said i saw something between Fry/Bender/Leela as a trio.
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tamashina-mina event (aka the sunset savanna jp event)
so anyway because i cant read jp (the translated vid is in parts so thats why im posting multiple links)
youtube
leona brushes it off but
youtube
so LISTEN. The chamberlain whatever his name is isn't happy with Leona for not putting his intelligence to help the country
but when he DOES provide an idea (aka actually mining the mineral resources) its shrugged off because they're all for being with nature
youtube
so what im understanding is leona is proposing to actually make use of what the land has to, yes, make a profit, but also it could help with all loads of things? like spreading water to be a little more easily obtainable once having the funds to idk throw away money for the good of the people (i mean. they're already rich aren't they? i don't really get it but also the world runs on money. i dont know if there are any benefits to it just sitting there, or if there are cons to digging them out or not but leona seems very passionate about it.)
but so its like this then
where if its not modernized then people will just. not live modernized. and i get that ig, wanting to live with nature (well not really but i mean its all down to preference isnt it? which im not an outdoor person so uh)
maybe it'll make more sense in the EN version (whenever it comes). or maybe i need someone to dumb it down to me like im 5.
but anyway you see my point right?? Leona provides an idea (is very invested in it) that goes to the good of the kingdom (making more profit but its also like they dont have to mine ALL of it he at least just wants them to make use of it at least instead of not even touching it)
and then it gets shot down because. basically. tradition. ???
anyway heres my idea: if someone like Ruggie Bucchi can exist (i mean as in someone born in a poor environment) in the Sunset Savanna, then clearly there can still be something done to keep people healthy and in comfortable situations without compromising idk the beauty of also being able to live with nature at the same time? to help make it a bit more convenient in the process at least? (like there could be a system that brings them water, but it could still be in a well so they can still do that process by hand, there will just be more water so they dont have to worry about idk running out? i dont know how wells work but i imagine they can run out eventually)
and if anyones like 'oh but we wont make a profit' then propose ANOTHER way we can make big income. aka MINING the MINERAL resources so it could be like nothing even changed or that we might be even making more than we usually are (but also probably supervised so they cant take advantage and just i mean get rid of the entirety of it? cause. its.. important right? so some but not all.)
maybe i just dont understand this, maybe im biased towards leona who knows, but i kind of also feel like its dumb to just brush it off. and i mean who knows maybe hes proposed it many times before, maybe hes shown them so many ideas and proofs and proposals related but they mightve been flawed in some way i dont know and thats why they refuse. who knows. it just rubs me the wrong way
its also kind of related to people brushing off leona just as being lazy and stuff like that (also did you know he only failed ONE year? he joined NRC a year late) but leona isnt really doing anything to try to change peoples perceptions of him because 'thats what they think of me, why should i bother?' like people hating on him for being [something something] compared to falena so then just. takes that in and is like 'okay so people think of me this way. if thats how they view me, then whatever.' hes still very competitive and all that stuff but theres also apathy in 'people will think whatever they want of me, why should i even try to change it?' (and hes probably heard all kinds of things at a young age that really stuck with him and shaped who he was. which goes from being really hurt by it to not even caring about peoples opinions anymore. dont get me wrong it can still affect him because the part of him that got hurt by it the first time is still there but yknow)
but so then the chamberlain is like 'why dont you use your smarts for the country'
and leonas just like
THEN SAY SOMETHING TO MAKE HIM NOT SAY SUCH THINGS??? (you knew him as a kid surely you could do something) like. theres. just. such an utter lack of trying to convince him otherwise. and i guess to him it would sound so fake so he might not be convinced at all. but then if you stop trying at all then he'll think that he was right in what he thought people thought of him and wont try to correct anyone. or in fact will correct anyone if they think positively of him.
i mean theres also not wanting to say it in front of other people. but. listen. if youre afraid of what the people think then it will affect the other negatively.
like for example if you try not to do lovey-dovey stuff in public then your lover will naturally feel like youre just trying to hide them away. or that you might feel ashamed.
so if the chamberlain tries to convince him when they're in private but in public he doesnt. then you can see what kind of conclusion leona would come to, right?
its kind of a tough situation because i honestly dont know what youd do in that situation. its just. i feel like they could communicate better. that there could be things to be done and it just frustrates me.
yes he does go on to say that leona is strong
and that he believes in him basically but
it just. doesnt feel like enough. and it could definitely be on leona for also not being willing to listen so hh. and i also get the chamberlain has a lot of responsibility so he cant just be there all the time and everything hfeuishfdi
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would u ever consider tagging your more sexual stuff? i get if you don't wanna, since it's your blog and all haha. just asking bc i looooove looking at your art, but i keep getting jumpscared by scott with his hands in his pants or smth lol
My bad! I am unsure if I will cause when something is relatively soft and clothes are on, I don't per say think of tagging it. I would suggest to block me if it is something that keep bothering you. My tumblr is relatively SFW but I would not say my blog is still safe to check out in public or that i wont post soft suggestive scenes. If these themes are not your cup of tea, don't check my blog out, lol! And I keep forgetting tagging things I meant to tag.
I draw everyday life, I love drawing lovers life the most, and sex is part of life. I dont post my most explicit art here or if I do, i crop it. If that is something you find not appropriate and upset you, that's ok, but I do what I feel appropriate for my blog. Again, if that is something you don't appreciate, feel free to block me.
I will try to be cautious with my tagging for next time. But I can't promise anything, cause some people feel some stuff inappropriate when I personnaly don't. We all have different boundaries and it is my blog, my way. I already don't share most of my work since I am a NSFW artist. I want to keep my tumblr as my comfort place where I don't want to worry too much about what people will think. That's why there are so many doodles here. I never thought my x-men fanarts would gain such interest here. I am glad people enjoy what I draw, but I mostly draw for myself. Especially when I share my doodles here. My tumblr was pretty quiet, so it was my little "me" space and I want to keep it that way. I am already too stressed with my other social media, I don't want that all my Internet experience to be stressful just because some people might not appreciate what I post or tag on my blog. But I can add some tag for next time... if I don't forget lol!
I also had enough people telling me what I should or should not do, and I would rather these people to block me. You are in power of handling your Internet experience with the blocking button, and it is not because you like some of my art that you can enjoy everything I post. It is ok. I will also try to tag properly, but again, I might forget sometimes. So if it is too much for you, block me!! :)
#i will really try to be cautious tho#but i easily forget things#and my blog is really a “i have a thought and i want to throw it into the void” kind of process#ask response
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Yan Yan (Yanqing) with someone who's very touch starved and clingy RAAA
STOP BC I TOO,AM TOUCH STARVED LETS GOOO
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Okay so first of all,he doesnt mind your clinginess at all,if something he finds it adorable,because he's lowkey clingy too
As for the touch starved part,it would take him awhile to notice that you're touch starved
And if you just told him straight up he would be like "oh okay" and make a mental note to be more touchy with you
But i dont think you're going to be touch starved while dating him any longer,because he literally thrives off of your touch,presence, and praise
Whenever you're around its like he has newfound motivation to keep going,to do better,for you
Whenever you praise him for anything,whether its his looks,swordsmanship,or sweet behaviour,he appreciates anything and everything
And most importantly and what we're here for,touch,hugs after thought training sessions,cuddles after long days or even weeks
Whenever he's exhausted he'll just snuggle with you,with a death grip around your waist and he'll just nap in order to recover his energy
After long days of training and duties he'll come and hug you tightly and just sit there for awhile
And knowing that you're touch starved he'll always make sure he holds your hand,or brings an arm over your waist or shoulder to keep you physically close to him in public
Kisses,definetly lots of them,he loves peppering your face in short and fast kisses while he cups your face
Speaking of which,he'll mindlessly cup your face and admire you,during naps,random staring sessions,or evem when you're doing absolutely nothing
And he also needs to physically feel you next to him or that he has an arm over you to feel safe
I feel like physical touch is his secondary love language
So as i said in the beggining you wont be touch starved for long,especially if he knows
You'd need the whole Luofu and the general to pry him away from cuddling with you
And about being clingy dont worry about it,he's just as clingy,he feels the need to constantly be in your presence
First thing in the morning that he thinks about is how he wants to see you again,to hug you again,to cup your face again,argh! he has to focus on his duties,but sneaking off to see you for abit wont hurt anyone right?
Becaue of the amount of time you two spend together its a daily occurence for the locals to see you two together to the point that its weird not seeing you two next to each other
Of course you can have your personal space if you need it,but otherwise he's spending all of his free time with you
And if your ever come to him asking him to hold you,your hand,or just give you any form of physical touch he's willing to comply,no matter who's watching ot if he's in the middle of training,you're his priority after all
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
I had fun writing this i hope you enjoy it! Sorry about the gap between posts,finals are around the corner
#yanqing hsr#honkai star rail#hsr x reader#x reader#yanqing#hcs#honkai star rail x reader#yanqing x reader#headcannons
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Hiya! Hiya hiya to the flood of people whomst came in randomly, both of people i made aware of my presence here and of people i honestly have no clue how you were informed-(/gen/nbr/lh)
Most of everyone here knows of me as a certain art person from a certain discord server, so here's the art i made recently for said discord server that i haven't been able to properly share anywhere!
sectioning will be attached dont u worry ur little bell-adorned heads
If you're not gonna stick around for the art, go check out The Celestial Idiots on youtube! They're really funny and got some pretty dingin neat lore goin on right now!
(this is gonna be a long post, so I put a cut to save your dash space!)
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First up, we've got the full drawings that were done!
The candy drawings! In order of appearance we have : Sundrop Insanity (featuring, you guessed it, Sundrop) Moondrop Calamity (ft. Moondrop!) Lunardrop Anarchy And Eclipse Enigmaticky (dont question me i was already running out of ideas around Lunar-)
Two out of the four of these are redraws of old pieces (that i may post later i am unsure-) and the other two were add-ons to finish the set :3! If you line SI and MC up together you get a full moon/sun effect! Same with LA and EE!
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Next up we have shitposts!,,,, Gods i have way too many of these of my computer, but that wont stop me!
Two images that were spawned from a stream (that i did infact miss, RIP me for napping/silly) Will i give context? no (yes, if asked-)
Featuring three characters! A loosely poppy-playtime-ified Lunar, and Smiling Critters'd Monty and Color!
And a redraw of a shitpost i used to jumpscare the Moon/Lunar actor with to my presence on this website <3 <3
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I haven't created anything else that i can confidently share, so, bye-bye for now!
(Also go bully @/moonwithsmores with love and affection. He runs the channel and he also is running a pretty neato undertale AU!)
#digital art#sun and moon fanart#sun and moon security breach#the celestial idiots#sun and moon fnaf#fnaf dca#daycare attendant#dca fanart#gods there are so many DCA tags holy shit-#WE'RE STILL PROBABLY NOT OUT OF THE TAGS LOL-#dca fandom#moondrop#sundrop#the celestial idiots fanart#also. i dont have a favorite you do#(i do. It's so obvious in who i bully)#Blackhole's Offerings#Blackhole Bickers#Jester b jestin'
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