#also dont question my actions
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Im in love with how the hearts are represented by nether stars,, its just one really cool to think of, instead of it being some modded in thing.
Like do you think the lifesteal members ever look at the night sky and think its alive? The night sky so full of lives, shining and shimmering just out of reach. Do they stare at the nightsky with greed, those with less hearts, do they stare with envy?
Do they ever kill the wither and think how remarkably similar they are to hearts? Holding the nether star close, like it might give them a life back. Do they identify witht he wither, they also drop those same stars when they die after all?
And then, how does it feel to hold a star/life. Does it burn like a real star? Is it freezing cold? Does it thump in rhythms or pulse with light? We are all made of star dust after all, the lifesteal members are just more star than most.
#sparrow speaks#lifestealblr#lifesteal smp#there#also im genuinely new so these are soemwhat retorical and somewhat real questions lol#sorry i was literally thinking “oh well I probably wont contribute much but art since im still catching up-”#and then i write shit like this#dorry#uhh i dont know how others headcanon this#but right off the bat- my idea for gaining hearts is them just straight up swallowing the nether star#yeah.#Cause one that funny and also I wanna have them do some physical action cause#THEY GAVE HEARTS A PHYSICAL FORM#WHatever man those with more hearts glow or something
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(guys i somehow cannot bring myself to draw mista how i planned to so have some filler until i stop procrastinating)
bro had to lock in last minute 🤣🤯😫
original pic under cut vvv
found on pinterest
#sigh. the consequences of his actions#cuh did NOT find any answers to his homework#fugo ended up whooping his ass#rightfully may i add#bug narshricha au my beloved#(dont question why hes not bug sized)#also my ear is bleeding. um.#narancia ghirga#pannacotta fugo#< mentioned#fugonara#< i guess?#meme#jojo no kimyou na bouken#jjba#jojo's bizarre adventure#digital art
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one of the things that fascinate me about thawne: yes, he CAN be normal with kids! surprisingly normal!
((not at all times, though. his mental illness still spills through and as usual he, in trying to manipulate or hurt others, spits out at them the exact stuff that would hurt him (or have in his childhood/barry's rejection interpretation) the most in the first place lmao))
but at the same time. his like second instinct when doing his bullshit is FUCK THEM (as) KIDS
(and, well. whatever this classifies as)
#whats wrong with him. seriously. he loves picking fights with literal children So Much#AND NONE OF THEM WITH WALLY ON THE MATTER OF BEING THE BIGGEST FLASH FAN. HOW DID THAT NEVER HAPPEN#about the middle page. honestly i DIDNT remember he is a Jerk in that way too until i checked his interactions with bart for this post#this man officially should not be allowed near children as a mentor.#just straight up drops ALL his insecurities on a poor kid in trying to make him feel ashamed. NO breaking the abuse cycle for this bad boy#the only thing he doesnt say is the direct 'you are a disappointment' altho the message is still the same 💀💀💀💀💀💀#AND I BET HES HELLA PROUD OF THAT. I MEAN CONSIDERING THIS FACT IG HE DOES TRY TO BE BETTER THAN HIS PARENTS. SOMEWHAT.#and omg he formulates his point like in problem based learning (leading the child to making the correct conclusion themselves)#im dying. professor to the fucking core.#and the way he feels the need to bring up flash facts in his appeal?? EO YOURE SO HOPELESS. THIS IS 100% HOW BART SAW HIM THROUGH#and god knows what he told thad promising to get him out of the speed force if he fought barry there and whether he was going to fulfill it#and do you even IMAGINE how FUCKED barry's mental condition would be growing up if thawne fulfilled his button threat#and i really REALLY wonder about the tornado twins and their relationship with 'uncle eobard' but that will be a separate post#he doesnt know any other way tho. and he might be actually mad at bart for not supporting his every action as The Flash#like. he tries to play family but the second they question he just goes WHATEVER. I DONT NEED IT. FLASH OF MY VISION RUNS ALONE#his problem is that he just wants attention. he doesnt see family/heroing for what 'its really about' or downsides that may come with them#everything is so idealized in his head. and the moment he faces reality with its complications the concept immediately gets antagonized.#and then he reconsiders and changes the conditions but fails each time never realizing the problem is his mindset and not everything else#black white at its finest yall#and man. RELATABLE.#also WHY is he standing LIKE A STATUE when appearing in front of bart????😭😭😭😭#poor museum rat has no idea what heroes in real life stand like#eobard thawne#professor zoom#reverse flash#the reverse flash#bart allen#the flash#dc
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have you ever considered...that identifying out of woman/girlhood because you don't relate to the societal implications, expectations, etc... contributes to making womanhood (feel) even more restrictive? maybe you feel better when thinking of yourself as anything but a girl/woman because you do not feel like a woman (what does that even mean?) but in my opinion you just added another brick into the prisonwall that is gender.
#just my opinion#i wish it was more accepted to question gender identity and to encourage others to question WHY they dont feel like#they “fit” their gender#and your actions have consequences for others too#there will be girls after you who UNDERSTANDABLY hate being perceived as female but their take away will not be that society sucks for wome#and needs to be changed and change happens with every gnc woman and girl who stands her ground and says fuck you to the gendered expectatio#placed upon her from the moment of her birth#but she will take away that as she does not fit the narrow societal definition of womanhood that there is no space for her in it and#that SHE needs to change and this goes on and on until womanhood is simply the label for people who present the most sexist stereotype of#what a woman is#and the fact that i get asked for my pronouns since having short hair and the girl with long hair next to me isnt is a fucking sign of that#and also i beg you to question why a pronoun a tiny word other ppl use when talking about you is SO loaded with negative/positive#implications that it holds so much importance for you#all this applies specifically for ppl without dysphoria btw#i also believe that dysphoria is at least heavily influenced by societal expectations too but its a bit more complicated#personal#you may send me death threats now lol i dont even care anymore#radfem safe#radblr#radfems do touch
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i've always wanted to try out this trend! i didnt think i drew him that different. i was wrong. very wrong.
hes so baby girl in my style what the fuck. oh i know, i was just drawing what gege meant to draw. dw, i got his telepathic brainwaves 👍
[time lapse + my headcanons for Noritoshi's appearance under the cut]
some headcanons i have while drawing him are semi obvious while others are bc i like it ahehahhaheha
cupid's bow lips! this was semi inspired by Mizuki Umetsu, the actor for Noritoshi in the jjk stage play! hes so. pretty. perfect guy for the role imo! i was captivated therefore my views changed.
longer hair! the thought that his bangs(? are the same length, or longer, as the rest of his hair is nice.. it also makes his inevitable haircut much more refreshing! i also just like long hair and its a fucking waste not to do whatever the i want.
thicker brows and visible eyelashes! i naturally draw thicker eyebrows because it looks pretty, but the eyelashes is so fucking canon bro. dont even fight me on this, you'll lose. i read a fic about Noritoshi where it said he took good care of himself and his appearance inspired jealousy. that fucked me up man, so now i draw him as beautiful as i can.
monolids! I've looked through the manga and i think its highly implied that Noritoshi has monolids? yk those lines in between the eye and eyebrow, he doesnt have them in the manga. i thought it was because of the expressions he had, but no. the others have them, except geto! so geto also having monolids is so fr in my head. i like that feature abt him.
loose hairs! the hairs that i draw on his face. they make him look so cute and a bit more relaxed. he's not trying to be perfect nor have a single strand out of place. he's just a bit more at ease... though if there's something important he has to go through, he sharpens up. becomes.. stiffer?
I UNINTENTIONALLY MADE HIS CHEST LOOK A BIT BIGGER IN MY STYLE AND I WANT TO APOLOGIZE, BUT I'D BE A LIAR. DOES THIS COUNT AS A HEADCANON??? I JUST THINK... SINCE. YK. HES AN ARCHER. AND DOES TRAINING. AND COMBAT. AND DOES ALL THOSE HIGH JUMPS... HIS CHEST. ITD BE A BIT BIGGER FOR HIS STATURE.. omfg. that'd imply that his legs are fucking insane. and his arms too, since he has to pull back all those arrows so quickly.. oh my fuck. this. this is a revelation. what are you hiding under those robes noritoshi...???? one day.. one day we'll see...
oh my fucking god i forgot that i wrote shit while drawing. please ignore my fucking stupid writings AND THE STUPID ASS THING IN THE MIDDLE I FORGOT ABT WHILE DRAWING..
#kamo noritoshi#noritoshi kamo#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#dawg my pc is so old. this drawing kept killing it off every few hrs#but nothing will stop my preaching of the gospel#ALSO I DIDNT SAY BUT DRAWING IN THE FUCKING ANIME STYLE WAS SO FUCKING TOUGH???#LIKE I FEEL LIKE IT LOOKS HALF ASSED BUT I DIDNT KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO.#I STRUGGLED HARD BRO#FUCK#but i also learned a lot while doing it so it was hella fun#ahaha..... his lips are cupid's bow.. meaning his words are cupid's arrows.... meaning he could make you fall so hard istg#and hes an archer..... ahhaha... a nickname you could give him is cupid. ahahah. thatd be so cute. ahahaha <- insane#also me explaining fucking eyelid lines was spectacular. wheres my teaching license#AND I CANT FUCKING WAIT FOR THE STAGE PLAY DAWG. noritoshi's clothes flowy and in action..... im gonna study and fawn the FUCK out of that#as for the time lapse. ignore how i ignored the guidelines. why the fuck do i do that. bc im a cult leader thats why. dont question me#AND I APOLOGIZE FOR MY REVELATION AT THE END THERE. IM A DEGENERATE AT HEART. BUT I MUST REMAIN CLEAN. IF NOT TUMBLR GODS WILL KILL OUR CUL#but like i said i can be suggestive. heh. heh.#peep how i said [blank under the cut] heh. wow im such an online person.#oh how cool of me#null rot
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things id make if i had the time energy and commitment to get better at 2d art:
a watery almost impressionist looking Steddie swan lake comic with Steve as the swan prince (and a happy ending of course)
#devon thinks sometimes#ive tried 2d art i promise idk i just am never happy with it#its like i understand how things work but my body wont make it happen right#im much better with 3d arts#but i dont think id survive trying to do stop motion#live action films also out of the question#so it just lives in my head#id probably steal the woodland creature-kids idea from barbie in swan lake#that skunk girl is erica and porcupine boy is dustin ofc#probably wouldnt borrow the enchantress i dont think so idk whod be robin#or#hmmm#idk how id do the plot i havnt even thought if themes yet bro#but yeah i think itd be so pretty and steves fit would be this all white suit with pearls and beading that almost shimmers in the moonlight#eddie could write and sing him a song like a bard#its be so pretty agggg#maybe one day
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i have finished watching g-witch and Belmeria is person I relate the most to.
#she has no strengh to admit her wrongs and act to redeem herself#and i love it because i usually feel the same way#feel like i dont have any choice rather than follow other people orders... and its not truth but it usually feels really limiting#because standing for myself is not the immediate option my brain suggests for me#even though she has a criminal record for conducting experiments on humans she doesnt see herself as villain#but she doesnt think her actions are good so... as long as she gets no punishment she proceeds doing questionable things she was assigned 4#because she believes she is under control of people with more power and thats how hierarchy works#i like her little bravery in ep 23... in danger she tossed off her anxious beliefs and broke from chains of helplessness she created hersel#i like her character a lot because she has a weak personality and she is an adult who lived like this for a long time...#its not like the anime tells 'its okay to be weak' because no one actually tells her that (some charas get annoyed even)#its more like anime allows us to see that adults can be irresponcible too..they can be full of anxiety and fear... and its not good for the#but they exist like this... and they can do better if only there was situations or people that could help them gain more confidence#sorry i have so many thoughts about her. thanks for coming to my ted talk#gundam the witch from mercury#mobile suit gundam the witch from mercury#the witch from mercury#belmeria winston#my art#also big thumbs up for her design... its simple and she feels like a really tired woman who gives no attention to her exterior.. i love it
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One day I will be able to properly break down the themes of authoritarianism, bioessentialism, and the VERY flawed "hero and villain" dynamic in MHA and then it'll be ALL over for you...
#.txt#superhero media is basically always full of copaganda so its no surprise my hero has its fair share#but MAANN. the politics of this series are pretty bad.#and like the only people who ever really face consequences for their actions are the villains bc they're all ''the bad guys''#no matter how fucked their circumstances are#or how much they've been abused by systems meant to protect them#a lot of the later stuff that challenges the hero system (questioning hawks actions. lady nagant as a whole) feel so...shallow. idk#im not very good at expressing my thoughts about this concisely so it all just rattles around in my brain#its like that one post going around like ''isnt it weird how the bad guys in things who bring up good criticisms of systems of power always#have to like kick puppies or something too so you know they're Bad so you shouldn't listen to their points''#my hero does a LOT of that#mha#also im not quite sure bioessentialism was the proper term to use but the fucking. i dont know how else to phrase it#quirk racism. basically. all of the treatment of heteromorphs by society and how quirkless ppl are looked down on.#idk it goes pretty unchallenged and is written pretty poorly imo.#like the stuff with spinner. that was so. poorly written and in general trying to do racism allegories doesn't.#pan out very well in most shounens#that's a whole other nuanced topic that i wanna properly gather my thoughts on for now i just. don't like it lol.#mha rewrite tag
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nooo like reading maria janion's such comprehensive overview of vampires and what defines a vampire and how the myth changes through times and authors, as entirely expected, has contributed to my regis brainrot.
because though it's obvious how many tropes regis subverts as he literally talks about himself, it's more overwhelming when they're all summarized focused on examples from across history and the literature canon, and pretty much hitting none of them or fucking with all of them. because it's not that he just doesn't fit in within his own fantasy universe, but that he doesn't fit in within the broader canonical definition...
"my personal vision of fantasy (...) he is not the typical vampire bloodsucker, according to the dictates of the canon" ... uggghhhh sapkowski, in his witcher, by challenging all genre expectations and tropes, creates all of these characters that don't fit in anywhere, neither in their universe or in the broader canon. and thus, can only find fraternity with each other
i was just reading like 'so... so he doesn't fit in *anywhere*... 🥺'. regis in baptism of fire explaining how he doesn't conform to either vampiric expectations of vampires (socially, for his personal principles) nor of human expectations of vampires (biologically, for his literal existence). but it even goes farther when you look beyond the witcher and to the broader literary and mythological canon. in practically every understanding of a vampire he would not be recognized as one of them... and does he even want to.
#> not a vampire by the majority of definitions#> born a vampire#> doesnt live as a vampire#> when people find out they are curious and apprehensive abojt him being a vampire#imagine some bullshit question like ‘but do you FEEL like a vampire’#honestly. this is how i feel about my gender <3#'and then people fetishize me and it's weird' - he literally understood everything there is to understand. regis honorary lgbt#'honorary' ... im jk lol#isn't this most of the heroes of the witcher though#milva: 'i just feel like i dont even fit the definition of a woman' | regis (not-vampire): 'felt' | cahir (not-nilfgaardian): 'felt'#the elbow-high diaries#i would stop thinking about regis but also i cant sorry :p#c: regis#everyone in the hanza and their duality... they're all half-one thing half-another#call my favorite characters coffee... because you know you put that half-and-half into them#me: biracial and nonbinary crying 'idk why i relate to these witcher characters so much'#witcher characters: cannot be defined by one half and live inbetween two worlds not fitting in either#WE UNDERSTANDED !#every time i start thinking abt this again i start humming 'here on the island of misfit toys...'#witcher/baptism of fire is like: moreso than how you personally identity your identity is determined by your social group views and actions#and that is why i love it sm. on top of being anti-war and also being funny and introspective and beautiful
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idk i do need to think more abt how ppls personal experiences interact w their Fandom Behaviors esp now that im less caught up in a specific fandom that was rlly bad about that lol
#txt#bc yeah sometimes it is rlly cathartic to see a character whos similar to someone who hurt you get hurt or even just portrayed as a villain#but at the same time its rare that ppl distinguish like. attempted objectivity & their subjective opinions on tumblr specifically lol#which i think leads to a lot of resentment#granted there r some people who ARE actually that crazy/fandom poisoned who do think like. e.g. liking rhea means you would have forgiven my#- irl abusive priest or whatever. & theres a good chance that fandom culture also creates such people. in like a vicious cycle yknow.#but idk im just spitballing#again just an example but. i dont rlly think i should have to write I Don't Have Religious Trauma Which Allows Me To Love Rhea before saying#- that i do love her & think some of her more questionable actions r not as unforgivable as many people make them out to be#which in turn means that ppl who dislike her shouldnt have to say I Have Religious Trauma And Therefore Etc.#but like. idk. maybe the proper conduct here is just whatever leads u to treat other people with the most kindness#i think all of us should keep our minds more open
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forever mad about how dirty they did aveline from act 2 onward
#thinking way too much abt it rn cus i just finished her quest today#she is important to liam and i enjoy their relationship a lot & also her character in general in the earlier acts#but MAN i hate what they did to her in acts 2 and 3#laya plays dragon age#feels like there is such a disconnect from her attitude between acts 1 and 2?#or well. maybe not disconnect exactly but even so there is an important shift there and we never even get to see it OR question it#she could have been such a good contribution to the story and the themes by putting her at a crossroads of#do i keep following what i know and become another cog in the system or do i challenge them and break out of it#cus like. in act 1 she is not above going against laws when her own morals (or even just biases) go against them#but is generally still in favor of ''regular'' law and order (which does get challenged by characters sometimes which is nice!)#(sort of) blind loyalty is already a fault of hers and now her loyalty is understandably mostly towards her guards#but then her companion quest is not in fact about herself but about frickin. courting the guy she likes???????#full on i thought this was a silly quest for levity in an act that has a lot of dark moments#but no it is Her Important Quest TM and not only does she not get with him if you dont do the quest#but her entire attitude and happiness going forward depends on it????? what the hell#also fun fact first time playing act 2 i thought that there was a lot going over my head and like#and some of it did yeah but i also just Assumed that bc the way aveline acted/ the guards actions were presented through her#didnt line up with what actually happened#(& her being so defensive and dismissive didnt line up with the impression i got of her before that)#sorry for the rant im just once again mad about cool characters being screwed over by the writing
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do i dare write the post looking at and trying to explain Queen Kristina's behavior? probably. i swear im trying to be less annoying about it but also like. i do what I want.
#also like *gestures vaguely at the person who used 'she had her son change schools after he got into a fight#so that he would have more supervision and structure WITHOUT CONSULTING THE 16 YEAR OLD CHILD HOW FUCKING DARE SHE' as an argument#like do i condone and agree with her actions? no. not necessarily. but i do UNDERSTAND why she did most of what she did#was she wrong a lot of the time? yes. were there other things she could have done? absolutely#still understand why she did what she did tho#anyway the real debate is do i feel like dealing with the people who are going to ignore me saying that i dont condone her actions#and continue to just say that shes an iredeemable cartoon villain? not really but also like#i havent gotten a chance to rewatch and really think about characters and their actions and stiff for a while#i wanna analyze it again!! i wanna just chill for a while!!#also that person vagued about me. IN the yr tag. which i clearly used. istg they could not have been older that 14.#anywho#i probably will do that this weekend#im off work on friday so i may just do a full rewatch and whip out my yr book#i mean i will do that anyway. whether or not i actually post about it is an entirely other question#young royals#shh ac
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so im writing a fanfic where Casey Jr goes to the mental hospital for a little while, and i cant decide what would be better to write so im gonna let someone else choose
#added context: ive been to the mental hospital#so im not gonna make it all 'ooh mental hospital evil with CRAZY PEOPLE in it!!#no its gonna be normal and mundane#the real question is do you want angst or action#rottmnt#casey jones#rottmnt casey jr#also yes this is a follow up to my casey has an eating disorder fic#but you dont have to read that to understand this one
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Remembering that a 4 hour psychological test means 4 hours under the examiner's microscope. I hope they let me listen to music during a written test, but idk if that would defeat the purpose or not. I... really don't know what to expect tomorrow, and it's kind of making me a bit nervous. Lol.
#speculation nation#i dont like to be psychologically analyzed. god i just remembered i have therapy this week too.#which that at least. i mean it's uncomfortable but ultimately it's just talking.#psychological testing they are gonna be Watching me. there will be the questions but also they will be judging my actions#and im so used to masking but that would actually go against me in that instance.#and i really hope theyll let me listen to music bc 4 hours of silence sounds like hell on fucking earth.#but i dont know if that's. part of the process??? put me through stress to see what makes me tick???#my goal is to get an adhd diagnosis but im also scared theyre gonna pick up on the autism.#im gonna be honest. but i didnt plan to get the autism diagnosed bc i dont want the downsides of that#ya know. societal and institutional ableism. etc etc. they might take away opportunities from me.#but it goes hand in hand. and surely it couldnt be too bad if they pick up on it...#i could manage through 4 hours without music but itd be hard. and it could do bad things to my brain.#i think im preemptively prickling up. like a porcupine. i dont want them Looking at me.#i need to just... chill out. whatever comes will come. and it's ultimately in my best interests.#this is what i need to get my adhd meds. it'll be worth it.#..... but im also worried about what else might show up. i know i got Problems. but i dont want them to... know about them.#all sorts of awful invasive questions about me and my past.#for someone who acts like such an open book i really am so allergic to actual emotional vulnerability huh?#decent chance i'll just dissociate thru the whole thing. to get through it.#cut the emotions off. who needs em. the brain can factually answer things without the emotions' input.#anyways im gonna go do some chores. peace#negative/#lol.
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hey. hey buddy? you have your settings to where i can't actually reply to this request, but i need to inform you that if you dont want people reblogging your stuff and adding tags, you can either turn reblogs off, or you could, i don't know, not fucking put it in the main tag for the show, where it'll inevitably get traction.
just a suggestion.
#ftr i did delete the post#but dude this is the 'reblog and tag stuff' website#if you don't like it happening then don't put it in the fucking one piece live action tag :|#or like. use any other website ever.#also if you dont wanna get called out publicly like this then don't block people from responding to you :)#'dont use my stuff' why are you making gifs if you dont want people to reblog them???? are you unwell?????#if i'd actually posted anything questionable in the tags i'd be more understanding#it was literally just the character name and my spoiler tag for the show#if you can't handle that then you are in the entirely wrong place
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Oh boy finally its the evening! Now I can chat with a robot about the motivations and emotions of the characters in my fic to better understand them!
#i am losing my god damn mind#also dont judge me for mainly asking about trevor he is so baby girl and i want to portray his emotions and actions as understandable#even if he eats people baby boy is sooooo valid <3#trikey#gtav#trevor philips#michael de santa#this is also how the robot looks at me when i ask these questions#like every other question it hits me with “bitch these two need psychological help” and im like “bestie i know”
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