#also I wish I could experience this episode for the first time again

[thingscanalwaysgetworse]

Never not going to be emotional about this

[saucy-mesothelioma]

On this day in 2019, the greatest "fuck you" in the history of television was gifted to us.

Eat shit, Bob. <3

[tortoisesshells]

Thinking about the use of "Drunken Sailor" in episode 85 again: that the shanty is an anachronism, a relic of the past that is itself a kind of a ghost? No one needs walk away shanties on the boats out of Collinsport in 1966; it's a reminder of another, mythologized time? Elizabeth has the portraits of the ancestors; Bill, who in life held on to his father's pocket watch rather than switch to a wristwatch, holds onto that other piece of the past - and passed that along, in his way.

[flanaganfilm]

howdy!! do you rewatch your own work? if so, how often? im wondering if it has the same "artist just sees faults with what they create" thing, or if youre able to appreciate past projects the way they deserve

I don't, typically... usually, by the time we're finished with post production, I've seen the thing so many times that I'm thrilled to stop watching it. I'm either sick of it, or just feeling like it doesn't belong to me anymore. There are other reasons, too - Hill House was a traumatic production for me, for example, I have a lot of complicated emotions woven into it, so I haven't felt ready to rewatch that one since before it aired. Maybe in a few more years.

Somewhat recently, I've revisited a few of the older movies with my eldest son, who is 13 now. He's basically as old as my career itself. We've watched Oculus, Hush, The Midnight Club (which he LOVED, proving it worked for our target audience) and Ouija: OOE together, and each of those screenings was a really cool experience. His reactions and questions were really fascinating, and I felt like I was able to see those movies anew through his eyes. That's the closest I've come to feeling like I was really seeing them, and that's only because so much time has gone by for those. I watched the Director's Cut of Doctor Sleep a few years back at the Stanley Hotel in Estes Park Colorado. It was part of a live NoSleep Podcast event, and that was the first time I'd seen that movie since it was released. It was also the first and only time I'd ever seen the Director's Cut with an audience. That was a really special screening and it meant a lot to me.

I haven't yet had the guts to revisit any of the TV series other than Midnight Club. As my kids get older, I'm sure I'll watch them all with them. The one I'm most excited to see is Midnight Mass, which remains my favorite of the shows. I haven't seen it since before it came out - I remember the last day of post on that show, watching down each episode with final mix and color. That's a series I wish I could actually watch like a viewer at home, and while I'll never truly be able to do that, I look forward to looking at it with some real distance.

There are a few of the older projects I'd be curious to watch now. I wonder how Absentia holds up - I was such a baby when we made that movie, and it's been so long. I imagine I could watch that today and have a really trippy experience. I also haven't revisited Before I Wake in a very long time, and I always really loved that script. The movie was a rough road, and my feelings were mixed by the time it finally found its finish line (Relativity Media really beat that one up), but that could also be a really interesting viewing experience at this stage of my career.

But generally, each of these movies is a journey, and once the journey is over it's tough to ever really go back. There's little point, and moving forward feels like a matter of survival. The "finished product" is only the tip of a large, deep, labyrinthian iceberg for me. It's impossible to only see what's on the surface, no matter how hard I try.

(Interesting side-note: The only exception I've found to this rule is The Life of Chuck. We just finished post production on the movie, and I've watched it dozens and dozens of times now - but I've never grown tired of it, not even a little bit. That movie is something special, and I am eager to watch it again - and again - and again. I don't know that I'll ever want distance from that one; in fact, watching it brings me a sense of joy, comfort, and safety.)

[bloodstained-ballgowns]

i just rewatched ‘the woman who fell to earth’ a couple of days ago for the first time since it aired back in 2018 and the more i think about it, the more i like it.

thirteen is the only doctor for whom i feel a tangible, rose-tinted nostalgia. she wasn’t my first doctor, but she was the first doctor i watched live, the first doctor that i spent an actual extended period of time with over the episode rollout. her intro episode has middling parts (as can be expected with most episodes of Who) but there’s also so much good that i really want to highlight.

first of all, there are some really great character dynamics set up here. much more interesting than i remember, tbh. ryan is a guy who loves mechanics but is stuck in a warehouse job he hates, a guy who obviously wants to connect to people, a guy who by the end of the episode has lost both his mother and grandmother in the space of a couple of years and the step-grandfather he didn’t really want is all he has left (minus his absent father). that’s interesting.

yaz has a keen sense of justice and this raw, intense yearning to help people, to do something worthwhile, something more - the way she has chosen to express that is through law enforcement, but it’s not quite giving her the satisfaction she wants. that’s interesting.

graham’s experience with cancer means that he constantly feels like he’s living on borrowed time. meeting grace gave him purpose, gave him family, gave him the will to fight when he fought it was all but over, but now grace is gone. he and ryan aren’t related, but they’re family, and now they’ve got to figure out how to care for each other without the very lynchpin that brought them together. once again with feeling: interesting!

“i’m just a traveller. sometimes i see things that need fixing. i do what i can.” i like that they circle back to the ‘just some guy’ portrayal of the doctor here, both because it’s the one i’m partial to and because it feeds particularly well into the whole ‘the doctor is an unreliable narrator’ aspect, especially in the wake of the increased deification in the moffat era. it's a nice set up, even if it gets completely overhauled circa series 12/13. in fact, having thirteen keep this as a persistent attitude throughout the Timeless Child of it all could have been really effective re: her reticence with her companions and refusal to address or deal with her past.

the scene where thirteen builds her sonic screwdriver might be one of my favourite sequences in nuwho. i love that it’s a hybrid of alien tech and sheffield steel. i also love that they highlight the ‘mad inventor’ side of the doctor here (her teleportation circuit is based around a microwave?) and wish that they had carried it forward more. it would have been the perfect basis for her to bond with ryan over. jodie also pulls off the humour of the episode well, considering the significant shift from moffat dialogue.

i enjoy thirteen's outfit: the vibrancy of it as mirroring her childish excitability, but also as another part of the mask - if i dress all colourful then maybe i can ignore/outrun/masquerade my great capacity for darkness! etc etc. the shopping trip with yaz and ryan is a bit shoe-horned in at the end but it's cute that she finds it in a charity shop. (back in 2018 i bought a t-shirt with a couple of stripes across the chest solely because it remotely resembled the one she wore lol. nerd from a young age, me.) jodie also looks soo hot in capaldi's outfit though so a spin on the traditional suit would also have been appreciated.

some miscellaneous points: i like that she tells Karl off (“you had no right to do that”) right after saving him. i like that she gets it wrong at first and makes it clear that she’s working on the fly. she’s following her instinct, and that instinct is to help people. doctor who has been beautiful before but the cinematography takes such a huge step this era. “it’s been a long time since i bought women’s clothes” i am choosing to believe this is about river thank you and good night.

[carrymelikeimcute]

Going over the izzy/lucius/shark exchange is so interesting in the context of this being an episode about apologies. About making concessions and trying to fix things.

(In this ep there's a lot about ed making amends/accommodating the crew's triggers and trauma. It's also about stede having to fix things when he upsets the superstitious crew by not treating their feelings as valid.)

At the start we have Ed's (probably well intentioned) but evasive, non-apology. He does an 'I'm sorry you feel that way' sort of apology about 'whatever that bad stuff was'. It's a wish to do better, but it doesn't really cover what went before. A lot of people interject here, but Izzy remains completely still and silent, off to one side.

Lucius says he never used the word 'sorry' and rightly calls this out. Roach however, says he's never heard an apology before - and liked it - so this seems like as much as it's a first for Ed to take even some accountability, it's probably the first time some of the crew have seen a captain (or anyone else) do this too.

Archie says 'They just get away with it and we move on'.

Lucius rounds on Izzy, because obviously Izzy should have the biggest grievance here. But Izzy responds to the question about Ed's apology as if it was about piracy in general - clearly showing that the cycle of abuse is a feature, not a bug. This is part of his life and identity as a pirate. This is, actually, things going back to normal. You get whipped (and we see these scars on him later) no one apologises, and you just reset to how it was before, pretending nothing has been altered until it all bubbles over again.

Ed then tells stede that he's never apologised for anything. Confirming that most of the crew's responses are in line with their past experiences.

Then Ed goes to fix the door and tells it that it's not its fault that it's broken, it was just doing it's job. This directly parallels Izzy's rant to the figurehead about it failing to do it's job. Ed could be talking about himself here, as Izzy was talking about himself - but to me it doesn't fit that well, because what 'job' was Ed trying to do? He could instead be acknowledging, indirectly, that he is aware that Izzy was doing his job - trying to make sure they all survived and functioned as a crew. Ed probably broke that door, and he broke Izzy. But he has yet to talk to him about it.

Immediately following this, is when he scares the BEJESUS out of Lucius and tells him 'it would be faster to get all this out in one go'. It sounds like a reasonable suggestion, but we know that it doesn't actually work. Lucius pushes him off the boat and it doesn't help. Because 'I hurt you, so now you hurt me' doesn't benefit the abused, it's still about making the abuser feel better - making them feel punished and therefore redeemed, even when their victim isn't healed. I don't think Ed is trying to manipulate Lucius here - both of them think it might help to 'fix things' but fixing things takes emotional intelligence that's not really developed yet.

ENTER, THE SHARK

Izzy starts working on the shark, after the non-apology. He doesn't have it in the 'candle fighting' scene obvs - but he does receive an apology in that scene, when stede says 'feet' and then corrects himself to foot. It's a simple straightforward apology, even if he does sort of laugh awkwardly. Izzy also at least attempted to apologise to Stede in ep. 3 - so he clearly sees the use in apologies - AND right after the apology, Izzy agrees to help stede. Their relationship changes. It gets better and they're no longer stuck in those old patterns. Izzy is full-on gentle parenting stede - even when he shoots down a fucking sail.

He also, notably, states that the crew's feelings on the curse are important. Meaning, how the crew feels is important to him, period.

After this, we're back to Lucius throwing Ed overboard. But it doesn't work because Ed doesn't remember the talent show thing, he doesn't really know why Lucius was so blindsided by that betrayal of trust. It's not about who goes overboard. It's about the dynamics underneath that and those can't be fixed by just trading places for a moment.

FINALLY. We see Izzy finishing the shark, and he's completely unsurprised that Lucius pushing Ed into the water didn't fix things. Izzy's done this 'tit for tat' thing - betraying Ed to the English over being banished - and it ended terribly for both of them. It escalated things. He knows it's not as simply as getting even with someone.

The solution Izzy has chosen to the cycle of his relationship with Ed is to pretend that Ed hasn't done anything to him. A shark did it. Like with the non-apology, blame is being shifted to a third party 'the bad things' the 'bad times'. Lucius (rightly) points out that this is not healthy, but Izzy's response, that's better than not moving on, clearly resonates.

Izzy's response to being hurt was to 1. Get even and 2. (when that proved deeply unsatisfying and made things worse) to put the unresolved conflict behind him. Because he doesn't think Ed is ever going to apologise or change, and wanting those things just hurt more.

Anyone who has parents/a partner/friend who's NEVER apologised for anything, knows how he's feeling. You stop trying to have it out and fix the relationship, and it starts to wither, even though the other person thinks it's healthy.

'Not moving on is worse' is a warning, and it's one that Lucius takes to heart, immediately trying to centre positive things instead of resentment and anger. He shares his feelings with Pete, and their relationship thrives.

The issue here, is that denial doesn't work. Lucius might be able to move on from what happened to him without a proper apology from Ed, but that's because he's not in a relationship with him. Izzy's the one who's really in it with Ed - he's had DECADES of this shit. That can't be willed away.

Stede's resolution to the curse conflict models a healthier method and one that I'm hoping we see in a future episode between Ed/Izzy. He validates the crew's feelings, make a sacrifice (the suit) and TOGETHER they collaborate on a solution to the issue that is mutually satisfactory - he even gets to keep the shirt, as a sort of compromise. It isn't about just making stede or the crew feel better, it's about moving on together.

This happens with Ed and Fang! Ed actually apologises once he realises what, specifically he did wrong. Fang says they're 'sweet' because he beat Ed to death (oof) which outwardly seems like retaliation working - but there has also been an actual apology and Fang wasn't retaliating against Ed, he was standing up for himself - a physical version of saying 'that wasn't OK - you need to change'.

This method of resolution is echoed in the final scene, with stede and ed. They reach an understanding about the pace of their relationship and find a happy medium (holding hands) - mutually satisfied and moving forwards.

Bottom line? I hope we see 1. Ed actually apologise to Izzy and 2. the pair of them outline what it is they want to change in their relationship moving forward, ending the cycle for good.

Thank you for coming to my Ed talk.

[lani-heart]

|| series masterlist || next // previously ||

genre(s) -> angst, fluff, non-idol, hybrid au, poly au paring(s) -> yeowoosan x reader warning(s) -> mentions of abuse words -> 1.1K

I’ve never considered owning hybrids. 

I've always thought that they deserved to be free, and treated like people. Unfortunately in this state of politics it won't happen anytime soon.

Even then, the three hybrids who now live with me, almost seem like they wouldn’t operate on their own.

San… my pretty panther.

He's always been bad at leaving the apartment. When he does, he wears headphones. One's specialized for hybrids to cancel out noise. He can’t handle crowded places, sounds of screams happiness, or fear, or simple everyday noises like bells. You never notice how common it is until you have a hybrid flinch and grip you so hard it causes skin and clothes to rip. 

He’s exotic… and pretty but so so damaged. 

He’s never wanted to sit down and talk to me about what it was like nor do I ever expect him to. He wants to forget… he’s cried out how he wishes he could forget.

If only I could grant that wish to him. On his month anniversary, – when it was only me and Wooyoung by his side – he asked if we could go to the park. 

He loves watching TV. He also finds the sappy movies where you go to scenic places and just… soak it in. San couldn’t do that. That day a kid approached us and asked to touch San, but he wasn’t good with touch either. He flinches… so Wooyoung distracted the kid after they pull San’s tail. Innocent curiosity… kids don’t understand what no means when they are so young. 

After that day he locked himself in his room. 

He hates the outside world. Filled with cruel people and reminders of his past. 

It's a miracle he trusts me as much as he does. I once wanted to take him to a restaurant… but the door had a bell chime. It made him freeze until I commanded him and we went home. 

He will wait for a command and it's necessary to snap him out of it. 

Kun wanted him to continue therapy but he’s still not used to it. Shortly maybe? Whether that's in a year or two or maybe never. 

Despite how damaged he is, he’s truly an amazing person. He’s sensitive and caring… he’s beautiful. 

He cares so much about me, about Wooyoung, even the newest addition of Yeosang.

He always makes sure I'm not overworking with my book when I lose track of the hours. Whilst he makes sure to reassure Wooyoung with praises and sweet nothings everyday. Even Yeosang, he helps him with his traumas… assures him that he has them and that he isn't alone. 

Sannie, my first hybrid and I'd do everything to have him in my life – to be in his heart all over again.

“May this be the first life of many I live with you, you’re my reason to continue living”

Wooyoung… a sweet hyperactive fox.

He could go on for hours and hours doing any activity as long as he was having fun or with any three of us who joined him. 

He isn’t good at leaving the apartment either.

As much as he denies it he's still scared of me abandoning him one day. So when he does go out with me he's always glued to my side. Holding my hand or simply looping our arms.

He also feels the need to “make himself useful” since his previous owners had him do chores and cook for them since they were expecting a baby and were busy. 

His stress also gets him which is obvious because of how clingy he becomes and even picks at his own fur. His mind was constantly working and overthinking and I had to get used to praising him and reassuring him how much I loved him. 

It wasn’t hard but it hurt to know he needed constant reassurance to understand he’s loved by not only me but also to make sure he isn't a burden to San or Yeosang. 

He has a very bad mental health… one which will make him experience very long or even very short depressive episodes. 

In those days I spend most of my time in his room trying to offer him comfort. Sometimes we stay in silence or we’ll talk about nothing important for hours until we sleep in each other's arms. 

I owed Wooyoung a lot… he was there for me when I was in school and when my parents weren’t necessarily present in my life. He was there… he was always there and it's the least I could do for him. 

I’d be by his side for as long as he wants me. 

“I’ve loved you like it was love at first sight! My dream became a reality and I'm not ready to ever wake up”

Yeosang… my protective doberman.

I always found it interesting how my friends thought that San was the most protective and even though he is, San was a sweetheart. While Yeosang was intimidating. He hates the socialite life… in return doesn’t trust my friends. He also hates leaving the apartment, claiming it's his safe haven and always with his silly little nickname… angel. 

Claiming that's what I was… someone who saved him from his life in hell. Brought him back up, made him smile, and forgave him for his sins. He hates being reminded of his past… it's known that I had him and people will sometimes send me emails and texts to ask him for photoshoots. 

He, however, wanted to live a life of peace away from the media and the sins that others committed. 

He hates the attention, the photos, the videos, the whispers, and the gossip when he does come out with me. He’s a dog hybrid… he has good sight, good hearing… and good smell. He could tell when they gossiped about his prostitution background and even said horrid things. Not like he’d ever tell me what they said since… he didn’t want to make me sad or angry. He endured a lot… but he didn’t have to do it alone anymore. She was gone… and she’s never had a chance to get close to him again. 

If he saw me as his guardian angel, I’d act like it. I’d protect him with my life. 

“Why would I ever leave when I’m in paradise? Out there is hell, in here I have an angel looking over me” 

@wonuangel @danirael @angelsaway @krissroo @minkysmilk @mayonnaise-on-toast @robertsbbygirl @superbbananananana @hyukssunflower @kitty4hwa @justconniez @senpai-of-doom @kibs-and-bits @caityelise99 @ilovekinny @ateezennie23 @wooahaelemons @purplelady85 @watamotee33@chidess97 @littlelostdemonofthelight @maliamaiden @burntarm1n @spooo00oky @eastleighsblog @momo-peachy @kitstar1117 @quartzpirate @sunnyhokyu @iwishiwasrichasfuck @theginger543210 @pandolinka @ddaeing @kpopnightingale @slid3er @kekdo-520 @puppyminnnie @sparklinghwa222 @calicanbeevil @itsvxlentine @atinism @loumin908 @smally97 @rxnexxi @acetruepunk @majesticbeluga @namjooncrabs @tashizxy @itstheghostofmypast @smilefordongil @teeziny @totallynotlyntv @kyeos4ng @prodsh00ky @acescavern

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[stedes-tarty-pink-robe]

Now that I've seen all three versions of the finale, I can give my thoughts. It's not the worst final episode I've seen, but I am disappointed. I enjoyed the meta-ness but wish it was executed better.

Wwdits likes to play loose with continuity, especially dropping plotlines at the start of a new season, but they usually give us conclusions to arcs within a season like Season 5's throughline of Guillermo struggling with vampirism. Not this time. Season 6 just felt superfluous. Nandor/Guide, Jerry's return, the Monster's search for love - none of it went anywhere and could have been cut without much of a difference. Even one off episode things like Laszlo's growing awareness of Sean's mortality or Guillermo's cousin finding out about vampires came up and then were never followed up on. It makes me wonder why any of these plotlines were introduced in the first place? I'll give them credit for giving Guillermo's work plotline and Nadja's attempts to understand humans proper conclusions. Guillermo's experience teaches him that he doesn't belong in the human world and that humans can be just as predatory as vampires, and Nadja's job helps her become the most emotionally savvy member of the house, but that's it.

I get that "nothing ever changes with the vampires" and "nothing the vampire's do matters" are big themes in the finale, and they've popped up in previous seasons, but being thematically consistent doesn't make an ending satisfying if it doesn't have emotional catharsis for the audience. Why should we care if the characters don't? What's the point of the plotlines if everything keeps looping back around to where we started? Without a payoff, it can come across as time wasted.

That's a pity because wwdits had so much going for it - interesting characters and relationship dynamics and fun bits. It just seems like the writers didn't know how to go beyond the individual scenes to find a satisfying conclusion, so they didn't bother to try. They contructed the finale in an interesting way by having 3 versions of the same episode air, but the content still felt empty. The episode itself even seemed aware of this, reminding us that last year's conclusion would have made a better series finale and having Colin comment on how many series mess up their ends. I appreciate the writer's self-awareness, but it didn't make the episode any more enjoyable.

That said, I'm glad they did not stick with the "Guillermo leaves again" fake out ending because that would be the cherry on top of my "nothing ever changes or matters" problem with the show. I also liked some of the "perfect ending" hypnosis scenes. I'd rank them as 1 Rosemary's Baby, 2 Newhart and 3 Usual Suspects.

Overall, this is a flawed show that was still fun even if didn't quite stick it's landing.

[tangosyourtek]

Okay but all I could think about with Ranchers being the final two is how pathetic they'd be about killing each other because I think they genuinely wouldn't want to kill the other, but this would also be their closest chance to actually winning. And I think with how much Jimmy is popping off this season, he'd probably do it. Tango would definitely attempt something but lbr in a 1v1 he wouldn't win. He lost a 1v1 against Skizz earlier this season. I love this man but no /affectionately

But now I am rotating that in my head, thank you for that /pos

Something entirely unrelated that I wanted to ask

What's your favorite Hermitcraft season from Tango? Or what other series do you really like outside the life series?

EXACTLY !!!!!!!! Jimmy would love to let Tango kill him because damn, dying at the hands of his rancher is really hot, but since he’s really in it to win this season I think Jimmy would want to fight at the end because he doesn’t want the win just handed to him, and well again… fighting his rancher is hot… Plus, I think Tango would just be happy that he got so far and would want to let Jimmy take it, he knows he won’t fair in a fight (they’ve fought in MCC before).

My favorite Hermitcraft season from Tango… probably Season 7 or 9. Don’t get me wrong I am absolutely in love and obsessed with his factory in S10 (I miss you so much pls return soon) and the Hungry Hermits project, but there’s something about the Decked out 2 streams I wish I could experience for the first time again. And season 7 for the original Decked Out. The only pov I actively watched as episodes were coming out was Grian’s and a core memory I had was thinking, “Wow this mini game thing is so cool???” Also, toon towers……………..

[lif3lessb0dy]

₊˚⊹ ೀ lads boys; xavier & zayne

╰┈➤ headcanon/scenario; they saw how reader is struggling with her mental health

cw; self-harming(recovering), scars, depression in xavier's part, feeling not enough because of scars in zayne's part, cursing

a/n; if any of this topics is triggering you do not read! I kinda based some of this on my personal experience from the past so I did everything I could to make this accurate, if you feel like reading this will be harmful to your journey in any way feel free to skip it

i saw @chryssikyu 's post and decided that I can write something about it since I haven't found anything like that here.

╰┈➤ XAVIER!

you were a team so he could watch how your behavior is changing

he was really worried, he wanted to ask if everything is fine

he was headed straight to your apartment, prepared the questions in his head, he was afraid that it would seem awkward, you were just work partners after all

he knocked at your door

you opened but after you realized that it was xavier you just wanted to start crying again, you looked like a total mess, you didn't want to make him worry about you but it was too late

„can i... can i come in?” he asked quietly

„yeah, of course” you wiped your wet cheeks with your sleeve once again.

you were nervous asf

after some minutes of normal talk he wanted to just ask about his suspicions

you started crying and opened up about your recovery and depression episodes that lately hit you badly, you told him how you were feeling about your job, friends and life in general

he saw your old scars on thighs but didn't say anything, he waited to see if you would like to talk about it, he didn't want to force you to do this, especially now

you had such a bad mental breakdown that you have told him everything.

„(y/n) if you ever have such a bad time again that you want to return to self-harm, come to me. we don't even have to talk if you don't want to, if you ever feel like that again just come to me. or I will come to you, I don't want you to suffer in silence, it's not a shame to ask for help or support.” he looked at you „you are so much more than what you think, i don't want you to sit in the dark of your room crying and thinking you're useless, because you're not. I know you probably think my words are a joke, but I really... I really like you so I want you to be happy, I would do anything to make sure you don't experience these bad moments alone”

you didn't expect this. you expected disgust or laugh. why was he so nice and caring? in your eyes you were just a burden to him on a missions but he still cared about you.

„I also understand that you will need your alone moments, I just want you to know that you can count on me.” he gently grabbed your hand. „we're more than just a team, I care about you and wish you the best”

╰┈➤ ZAYNE!

it was your first date with him, you still couldn't believe that it was really happening

you wanted to dress nicely but after you saw yourself in the mirror you just started crying. no matter what dress or skirt you were wearing you still felt ugly. you felt like the scars on your body make you worse.

you called zayne and came up with some excuse just to stay at home. you really felt terrible, you just wanted to lay in bed all day and cry. you recently started therapy again because you knew that you were feeling worse and worse every day.

zayne knew that something was off. you were so excited, but suddenly you were sick and couldn't go? he knew that you were 100% healthy because he was your doctor after all, he didn't notice any signs of illness at yesterday's routine checkup

he decided to go to your apartment to see what was going on. he gently knocked and waited for an answer, after a while you opened the door.

„za-zayne?” he caught you off guard, you quickly pretended that you were coughing. „what are you doing here?”

„I wanted to examine you since you're not feeling well”

you felt guilty that you made him worry about you. you sighed and knew that you needed to tell him the truth.

„zayne... listen, i-i'm...” you started whispering.

„not sick?” he raised an eyebrow. „can I come in?”

you nodded twice. you felt embarrassed because of your lie.

„what's wrong, (y/n)? did something happen? or you just... didn't want to go? yo-you could tell me if you didn't want this date” he said calmly, almost like he thought that it's all because of pity towards him, well, he was the one who asked you out, he was worried that you agreed because you didn't want to make him feel bad

„no! i wanted it, but... it's really complicated” you avoided his gaze, not sure how to say what you were thinking. „since you're my doctor you know that...” you paused, your psychologist helped you learn how to talk about your feelings, but you were still afraid.

„know what?” he came closer and grabbed your hand. „don't be afraid, (y/n), you can tell me everything and I will not judge you” zayne said sincerely.

„do you think i'm worse than others because of my scars? do they make me ugly?” you looked straight into his eyes

„what?” he was completely shocked. „I have never thought like that and I never will. these scars are a sign of how much you've been through, that's the past, we can't change it, but we can do anything so you don't have to make new ones.” there was no insincerity in his gaze, only pure love. „I don't only care about how your body looks like, I see you as a wonderful, brave person who has a good heart. you're so pretty for me, some scars won't change it” he lifted your hand and gently pressed his lips against it.

„I wouldn't want people to start talking bad about you because of my...” he didn't let you finish, he cupped your face and ran his thumb over your lips.

„do you think I care about what they think when I have you by my side? you're a wonderful person, everyone admires how nice and helpful you are, often after you visit me in the hospital, people would talk about how beautiful you are, (y/n), let me show you how I see you, don't look at yourself like you're the worst piece of shit. i know it's not that easy, i'm glad you're continuing with therapy, and if there's anything i can do to show you how much i care about you – i will do it.”

[tellmegoodbye]

Hello friends! I have been planning on doing one of these in-depth rec lists for a while, and I figured that since this is our first week off from season 5 it would be a good time to finally post this!

This list includes some of my favorite fics that I read over the past several months, so some of these are going to be older, and others will be much more recent. I'm hoping you guys can use this to discover some new fics and writers, especially if you're just getting back to the fandom after the long hiatus we had.

---

Oneshots

In Watercolour - @bonheur-cafe

I'm not someone who ventures outside of Tarlos very often, but this fic was absolutely beautiful and I had to include it in this list. The journey of Marjan slowly realizing her feelings for Nancy was incredibly well written and something I could really relate to when I looked back on my own experiences of liking a girl for the first time.

I recommend this even if you're like me and not someone who typically reads NancyMarjan fic. Overall a very wholesome fic and a wonderful insight into what Marjan having a queer realization at this point in her life might look like.

Made From Stardust - @paperstorm

I absolutely adore 2nd person pov fics and this one was no exception! Andie's writing is always breathtaking and to be able to read all of these pivotal moments in TK and Carlos' relationship from such a unique and creative perspective was really interesting!

I recommend this fic if you like reading canon fics but you're looking for something a little different. This was a really refreshing read and definitely something I'll find myself coming back to.

All Turns To Silver Glass - @thevenstar

Another absolutely gorgeous 2nd person pov fic! The writing in this one is so beautiful and it really stuck with me so much that I found myself coming back to it recently.

I recommend this if you're looking for something unique! I don't think I've read anything quite like this in this fandom and this author really has a way with words so that so much emotion and introspection is packed into this 4k fic.

Recreate The Sun - @reyesstrand

This is a very beautiful AND hot first meeting fic! It really captured the way Carlos immediately fell for TK, as well as the excitement of kissing and touching him for the first time, and overall it was incredibly immersive.

Recommend if you love spicy first-time Tarlos fics!

Monday - @butchreyes

This fic was very emotionally heavy and action packed! It's a beautiful insight into Carlos' character that balances both the past and the present to tell the story, and it honestly felt like I was watching an episode of Lone Star if Lone Star decided to dedicate a whole episode to Carlos.

I really recommend this if you enjoy reading fics where the stakes are as high as ever for Tarlos, and if you love Carlos as a character and want to read more fics centered around him.

Your Back Beneath The Sun, Wishing I Could Write My Name On It - @emsprovisions

Tarlos on vacation my beloveds! This fic was such a fun read and there were so many beautiful moments that made me stop and close my eyes because I could really picture myself in that moment with the characters. Emily does such a good job at appreciating the smallest moments and highlighting their beauty, and her writing is incredibly immersive!

I recommend reading this if you enjoy TK and Carlos going on adventures as husbands and are a Tarlos gets a dog truther. Lizzie was the true star of this show!

Let Him Speak! - @goodways

This fic really showcases the thing I love the most about Shannon's writing. It's fun, and at times, incredibly hilarious! I also loved how this fic handled Carlos and TK bringing up the topic of kids again.

I recommend this if you want some Lou II shenanigans from the queen of hijinks and shenanigans herself! As well as some beautifully emotional moments that will make you smile like an idiot.

This Belongs To You - @chicgeekgirl89

This post-breakup fic had me in my feels! It shows how Tarlos are dealing with the newness of being back together, struggling with being apart for the first time since then, and recovering from TK almost dying.

Read this is you're craving some beautiful emotional hurt/comfort. Carlos is so sweet here, and this fic has some wonderful 126 family vibes too!

Chaptered Fics (ongoing)

Not Strong Enough - @honeybee-taskforce

This AU is in its early stages but I am in love with this universe and the individual superpowers TK and Carlos were given, and I can definitely say that I was hooked from the very first chapter!

I recommend this fic if you're looking for a type of AU that hasn't been explored much in this fandom yet and want to see creative worldbuilding, as well as new and interesting versions of TK and Carlos' characters. I'm excited to see how they continue to navigate this world!

Something To Give Each Other - @alrightbuckaroo

This wip contains some of my favorite smut scenes I have ever read. I love how the love and trust between TK and Carlos is written here and I love how so many different types of intimacy are being explored.

I reccomend this if you love smut obviously, but even more importantly I recommend it even if it's not something you'd typically seek out. It's very hot and unapologetic, but it's also beautiful and tender and really highlights how much TK and Carlos truly love each other. There's also no overarching story here so all of these chapters can be read as oneshots if you're someone who doesn't read wips.

Live To Tell - @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut

If you know me, then you know I'm a sucker for angst, but another thing I absolutely love is horror! Jamie has really mastered that aspect of this fic and when I'm reading this I really feel like I'm in TK's shoes and feeling his fear right alongside him. There's still so much mystery to unveil about who this antagonist is and I can't wait to see how this story unfolds!

If you're not too squeamish about whump or horror then I definitely reccoment giving this fic a read! I love when authors aren't afraid to drag out the scairest and most painful moments, because to me that makes the reading experience so much more immersive and satisfying.

When Fate Cries - @theghostofashton

We all had a great time watching the Olympics this summer, right? If you're in the same boat as me and experiencing withdrawals from that excitement then you should absolutely check out this AU!

I love how this fic navigates the world of gymnastics shows how a traumatic injury can affect an athlete's mental health, as well as the overall pressure TK and Carlos feel performing at such a high level with such a large audience. It is really interesting to see how all of this affects them as individuals, as well as how their relationship has developed overtime.

Even In The Dark - @ironheartwriter

This is definitely one of my favorite AUs I've read for Tarlos so far! Lana has really put so much creativity into this fic and the worldbuilding is incredible! I also love how TK and Carlos are such different characters as opposed to canon and I really love how much their individual powers suit them.

I recommend this fic if you like reading fantasy, mystery, and an unfolding adventure that slowly makes you fall in love with both characters even if they are at odds with each other.

Chaptered Fics (completed)

So Much For Summer Love - @strandnreyes

I cannot reccomend this fic enough! Jen has written so many incredible AUs but this was one of my favorites. It just gave me so much nostalgia and was generaly such a feel good fic about TK and Carlos finding each other and falling in love.

I recommend this fic if you love the beach, Tarlos being idiots and love, and found family vibes!

Call Me (By My Name) - @welcometololaland & @rmd-writes

This fic was so much fun to read! Not only did it have a lot of amazing smut, but we also get to see a different take on how TK and Carlos meet in canon through both of their perspectives! The alternating pov was utilized really well here, and I remember feeling so much excitement and anticipation while waiting for each update!

I recommend this fic if you want to watch our favorite idiots unknowingly having phone sex with each other and slowly fall in love. There were so many hilarious moments where they were completely oblivious, and there were so many beautiful and emotional moments in this fic as well.

Love Can Pull You Out Of Yesterday - @alrightbuckaroo

This fic is so creative in the way that it incorporates the twist of a time loop into the already emotion-pakced storyline that is the breakup/ice storm arc. I think it adds a really unique element that also elevates the tragedy surrounding everything that happens. It's also very thoughtful in the way it tells this story from Carlos' pov, and the way it all unfolds is ultimately very satisfying!

I recommend this fic if you're a fan of the time loop genre, or if you want some delicious push angst!

Dance Me To The End Of Love - @bonheur-cafe

This fic is so beautiful! It will take you on an overwhelmingly emotional journey through different stages of TK and Carlos' relationship, all through the lens of dancing! This theme is perfectly incorporated and I love how it holds so much importance in this relationship.

I highly recommend this fic for something that is both conceptually simplistic, yet rich in gorgeously written scenes that had me crying and smiling like and idiot.

Series

Let Me - @heartstringsduet

This is the ultimate dom/sub fic! Michelle really does a wonderful job of exploring this dynamic and how exactly TK and Carlos would navigate all of these new feelings. This series also does a great job at showing the development of trust in their relationship and highlighting just how mental health and sex intertwine.

I recommend this if you want to see a really insightful look into TK and Carlos as individuals and as a couple, absolutely gorgeously written sex, and some wonderful and realistic development when it comes to communication.

Tu Corazón Es Mío - @lemonlyman-dotcom

This series is such a cool idea and I've been loving it so far! I think it's awesome how each installment is based on a different song, and the way this series takes you through different phases of TK and Carlos' relationship makes for a fun mix of emotions!

I recommend this if you enjoy songfic mixed in with some beautiful in-between canon moments!

Wherever You Stray, I Follow - @strandnreyes

Did somebody say vampires?? I have to say that this type of AU never used to be something I would seek out, but I absolutely love the way this story unfolds and you can immediately tell just how much care and effort Jen put into building this world for TK and Carlos. There were moments where I cried, moments where I couldn't breathe, and moments where I felt every other emotion you could possibly imagine. Every fic in this series is a gem, and I am loving the latest installment so far!

I recommend this if you love vampire AUs, obviously, but also if you love stories that have higher stakes, and stories that leave you guessing and get you on the edge of your seat. If you have an appreciation for gorgeous scene settings and a story that becomes more expansive and intricately detailed as it goes, then you're going to love this fic.

Missing Moments - @paperstorm

The ultimate filler fic series! Andie does such a good job at breaking down even some of the smallest Tarlos moments from the show and really slowing everything down to give us some beautiful insight into the things we didn't get to see.

This series is completed up to season 3, and I highly recommend reading it if you haven't already!

Season Five Codas

There are many writers who have gifted us with some beautiful season five fics. Here are a few of my favorites + some series that you can check out!

@morganaspendragonss [x] @heartstringsduet [x]

@theghostofashton [x] @bonheur-cafe [x]

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He's The Air I Would Kill To Breathe - @morganaspendragonss

If I had to pick one fic from the above-mentioned series to recommend, it would be this one! The angst was particularly powerful, and it's very memorable for me because I had to take a minute to stop crying before I could finish reading. This episode definitely tugged on our heartstrings, and then this coda amplified all of those emotions in such a beautiful way.

Deeper Than Breath, Closer Than Air - @carlos-in-glasses

This coda takes you through a whirlwind of emotions. There are a lot of conflicting things at play here, and this fic beautifully tied it all together and touched on everything TK and Carlos are dealing with. They laughed. They cried. They had sex. They did it all and this fic will make you feel ALL of it.

Brighter In The Morning - @strandnreyes & @paperstorm

Even though this is technically a chaptered fic, it is a collection of season five codas so I wanted to include it here. I absolutely adore this concept, and the fact that it's cowritten just makes it even cooler! These season five codas are hot, angsty, emotional, and beautiful extensions of each episode.

Breaking Like A Wave - @reyesstrand

This coda was absolutely beautiful in the way it broke down all of the emotions surrounding episode five. I loved the way the sex is written to be both tender and desperate, and overall it really shows just how much love there is when TK and Carlos come back together after all of that tension.

[madeby-meru]

Thoughts on Episode 10 (Jason Route)

Now that I am chill after losing both the illustration and the route and having to watch it somewhere else, I can give my thoughts on this episode! ^^

I wanted to upload this sooner but had no time to finish it lol

beware of spoilers under the cut!

Overall, my main feeling while playing and after finishing was that i was tremendously bored for 90% of the episode. And honestly this makes me sad! I really like filler episodes, i love silly little moments that don't add much to the story itself but that let you see the characters in different situations and learn other tidbits of information about them. For example, I liked going with Brune and Elanda to look for Thomas, seeing them in a situation where they're worried about a friend that could be in serious trouble and how they reacted differently to everything. It adds depth and personality (which these characters desperately need). I have seen Roy's route in this episode too and i liked how it added a bit to his characterization of this very sweet and caring man. I have to say that i also loved seeing Thomas' mom again and im soooo happy that she got a redesign! (even though I wish she looked like an actual 60 year old woman, girlie looks addicted to botox). I would have loved to see Iris too but we got a couple more characters from the MCL games so I'm happy with that. I like seeing that we are, indeed, in the same universe lol.

However, in my opinion anything good or interesting in the episode was completely overshadowed by the sheer *absurdity* of it all.

It's the same issue as always, the "plot" doesn't make sense and unintentionally the characters end up being depicted terribly and (usually) Devon and Thomas suffer the most.

Devon looks like an irresponsible boss that doesn't keep his empoyees in check and lets them do whatever they want even if it harms the job or other emoplyees's work. He postpones the meeting with the town hall (would he even be allowed to do that? i'm sure this would have negative impact on Devenementiel) to look for Thomas, which honestly that's a good friend move so respect for that... but that is a full grown adult, not a child, and you dont even know if something actually happened to him. I'm sorry but here the job should take priority, it makes no sense for everyone to halt their work day and waste time (with a relevant project !! with the town hall !! in their hands !!) cause someone didnt come in.

Sending everyone to just look around the city is... so stupid? how big is Amoris? 1km square? for them to think that they can wander around and magically find him? ????

Now the ending was just... what the actual fuck.

I don't think the writing team is truly aware of how badly Thomas is portrayed. First of all, if you have a motorbike accident that is serious enough to leave the morotbike destroyed like they describe it: you do not walk away like nothing happened! Talking from experience, even a relatively small accident can leave you badly injured. And from what is being described in the episode Thomas should have been hospitalized! It makes no sense. Second of all, who in their right damn mind leaves a demaged vehicle in the middle of the street and walks away to buy a replacement? That is a fine, that is a public safely issue, a general safety hazard and a traffic obstruction, who does that ?! "He is socially unaware!" no, that is being straight up stupid and a jerk.

Y'all are portraying Thomas as an egocentric, careless, and self centered guy that does not care for anything or anyone around him other than himself, an irresponsible person that does not care if his actions are detrimental to his job or colleagues. And if we put this together with episode 8 showing him as someone with zero respect for boundaries or privacy and that will stalk coworkers with no remorse, yeah you're making a wonderful love interest.

And this pisses me off, this feels out of character. Thomas is such a fun and interesting and cute love interest, he could have one of the best romance stories in the game, why would you paint him like this? I'm sure that the intention was a "haha silly guy doesn't understand!" moment but y'all definitely don't know how to write that.

And I don't think this is "reading too much into it", cause you can see it all in plain sight. And also, analyzing shit and "reading too much into something" is fun for me.

This episode could have been so fun. It could have been a silly misunderstanding with some days off that Thomas takes to go to a competition (maybe we initially could think that he had an accident because a similar bike had one that morning! or because he had been complaining about motor issues and being wary of a potential accident!). In his route we could go see him and he could tell us about his hobby, and in other routes we could do something related to the other character's interests. We could get to know more about them, its an appropiate episode topic for the place that we are in in the relationships and its just cute and fun.

But anyway, I unfortunately could not play Jason's route myself and I had to watch it somewhere else instead, which honestly pissed me the fuck off cause i can't afford a replay at all. The special scene was cute, I liked the tone and how Jason sounded like he was trying to play it cool with all the "heh i just did it to show im better" (i can see right through you silly man). Ngl im sad i dont have the scene to replay it u-u

Thomas' illustration was my favorite by far, both him and Ysaline look gorgeous fr fr

[octocharger]

ok i'm sorry this show is what i'm reviving this account for real quick but i've been turning this over in my head and i kinda gotta get it out real quick so uh. spoilers for Lost and Founder's Day, Battle of the Dimmsonian, Lost in Fairy World and Operation Birthday Takeback under the cut? we ball

Peri is kind of... giving me slight gifted kid right now?

i mean, watching this show i've noticed that he's got a lot more anxiety than i've seen people point out, lemme try to explain in Lost and Founder's Day, he starts off all suave and cool, which is honestly incredibly different from what we've seen of him *besides* when he explains to Dev why he can't go to Fairy World in Lost in Fairy World, and i'd argue the end of Operation Birthday Takeback, where he's trying to cheer Dev up with a wish. the latter of them seems like this more so, but i think it's painfully obvious that in all 3 of these occasions he was putting on a more confident act, that same showman-like personality he started with but, frankly, most of the time, he seems anxious or tired and exasperated, mostly to do with Dev probably. for the record, i do NOT think he hates Dev AT ALL. it's kind of a complicated relationship between the two that i love but i'm not gonna get into here ok, so Peri puts on a showman personality when he's not that, so what? yeah, in A New Wish alone i don't really have much to go off of yet, and i could just be entirely wrong, but there's some details i wanna take note of to at least potentially back me up here: - He was Timmy's godbrother as a baby - He was the most popular kid *ever* in spellementary school and a pretty smart one at that

for the first point, i bring Timmy up because. he was a notorious menace. like i don't think i need to get into that, and i think for the fact that Peri managed to deal with him growing up, people might compare him now to how he was back then, even younger than Peri can genuinely remember

for the second point, we don't know much about Peri's academic life that i can say for certain, but i think it's entirely possible that he was revered as gifted as far as we know, which could lead to him constantly trying to exceed himself on that last note, i wanna bring up how he acts in Lost in Fairy World, where he constantly tries to assure his parents that he's got everything under control (when he clearly doesn't)

i feel like these are all a bunch of scattered thoughts that i wanna let other people try and connect the dots with me with this idea... anyway, it might also be worth mentioning that, again, he's the first fairy baby in thousands of years. assuming he went to the Fairy Academy to become a fairy godparent there's a good chance he was surrounded by classmates who are like. thousands of years older than him. reminder that Peri is like. 20? 30? he's like a fetus to these guys. he might be getting compared to with people with thousands of years of experience with life that he doesn't have he also mentions, albeit in an offhanded comment, that fairy godparenting is a family business...

anyways these are all a bunch of random 6 AM thoughts that i have been turning over n all that in my head since last night's episode

btw not related but i feel like adding on, i'm pretty sure Peri's still Dev's godparent, he didn't wish for him to STOP being his godparent, just to leave him alone

[schrodinger-swriter]

Could you possibly write A, B, E, and H for Lucifer?

A, B, E, and H for Lucifer

I wish to apologize in advance if this one is a little... off... I'm currently on episode 3 of my rewatch of Hazbin Hotel, and between my first watch and reading his wiki.. I still find it hard to grasp Lucifer's personality. If this is out of character, I will gladly take the L

Regardless, I hope you enjoy!

ATTRACTION:

I think he would love someone creative. He himself spends his days creating (the rubber ducks) and experimenting with looks and the like. Perhaps he would like a like minded individual that feels comfortable pushing back against authority, willing to question the way things are and look at the world through a new lens. Personal choice, for lack of a better term, matters to him. It's why he is where he is now. Even if he disapproves of most sinners, I think at least a few are capable of worming themselves into his core.

BONDING:

I enjoy the though of talking to you while he works on something, still offering you his attention while his hands work away at his latest project. However, I do think that he would try to have one on one time with you. No distractions... I think this is more likely after he talks to Charlie and gets on board with her plan to redeem sinners... though that may be wishful thinking, with enjoying the idea of Lucifer trying to be present in his loved ones lives. Of course, this will take time, but it's a start..

EMOTION:

This is another tough one... I can see him emotionally pulling away, but I can also see him banding with you when things get tough. It's hard to say, it heavily relies on what's happening and how invested you are in the relationship. He wants to love with you with his whole being, but much like with Lilith, he will very well fall into his depression if things get tough.. lord forbid it leads to you two separating. He doesn't want to repeat the mistakes, but since I'm currently unsure of why he and Lilith separated I can say for sure where he's going to overcompensate.. Interesting one, might revisit this when I have the time to deep dive on his character.

HARSH:

Another interesting one, I think misunderstandings are more likely than full blown arguments. Touching on the above segment, he might try to work through the problem and find a solution, out of fear that it might tear apart this relationship. Though this is usually after giving you both ample time to cool down and become ready to face one another again. Typically, he's usually the one who's ready to smooth things over first, through communicating and trying to plan something for the two of you as a means to take a step forward.

[trans-axolotl]

I think the reason psychosis is always viewed as a crisis by non-schizo effected people is cause neurotypical people are always told and believe that an episode of psychosis is the most terrifying thing that could happen. Like at least from my experience, descriptions, talks, and depictions of psychosis is AS something that's deathly scary to not know (and assumably never again know) what's real and what isn't, some depictions showing any episodes as worse than death. Like obviously that's not true but it stays with people; the telling of "it's the worst thing that could ever happen everytime" and definitely made the first few times I dealt with psychosis and hallucinations a lot worse and a lot scarier

yeah! so much of the messaging around psychosis and schizophrenia is so fucking dangerous because of the way it continually reinforces these ideas that psychosis is always terrifying, life-ending, and the worst case scenario. like that can have materially dangerous impacts on the lives of people living with psychosis/altered states. i think that kind of stigmatizing messaging about psychosis really demobilizes people in our communities and convinces people that they don't have the capability to support their loved ones with psychosis, and instead creates this idea that "professionals" are the only ones who could ever actually support someone through psychosis. and that leads to so much more forced institutionalization, pathologization, violence towards people experiencing psychosis, and just really a lack of the kind of proactive community support that could actually help prevent some kinds of crisis and distress.

i think it also makes it really hard for us, when we start experiencing psychosis/altered states for the first time, because there's really no framework for us to understand and cope with our experiences beyond just "this is the worst thing ever and there's no options for me." i think it creates a lot of forced shame and secrecy, as well as pushing a lot of us into more intense crisis because we have nowhere to go to get support. and like, when you google this half the shit that comes up tells you to call 911 immediately, and when you're someone who can't do that because it's dangerous for you, you're just left with no fucking options or getting pushed into treatment options that don't respect your autonomy.

i wish there was a lot more recognition that psychosis/altered states are something that can happen to anyone, and actually do happen to a lot more people to varying degrees and in different contexts. that psychosis is something that it is possible to live fulfilling and meaningful lives with. that you don't need to be an expert to support someone living with psychosis/altered states. and that there is so many ways of living with psychosis, and that antipsychotics and therapy are not the only options, and should never be a forced option. i also have so many thoughts about how desperately we need informed consent for antipsychotic medications and how fucking mad i am about the amount of information that is withheld from psychotic people about the side effects of our meds, the withdrawal experience, dosages, other options, etc etc etc.

anyway i just really recommend that everyone, whether you're someone who experiences psychosis/altered states or not, learns more about psychosis and do the work to challenge all these internalized myths we learn from society and the psych system. i highly recommend checking out the hearing voices network, and also really recommend Project LETS anticarceral altered states training to learn more ways to help support yourself and your loved ones.

thanks for this ask, i really agree with what you're saying!

[egot1stical]

ramblings about how winter king is not a simon but an ice king from my insta story. no idea how much sense this makes

Not to post a serious analysis of mr oncest bait, but it's kind of... *wrong* to say the winter king is Simon? I think it's more accurate to call him an ice king who THINKS he's Simon. His whole bit is that he removed the madness of the crown from himself, but the ice king isn't just "simon but crazy". The ice king is the result of the wish crown's curse over the span of 1000 years breaking down Simon's psyche and replacing and warping and mixing it with Evergreen (specifically Gunther's warped view of him) and adding more madness and sadness till he basically experiences ego death. We know our Simon (at least at this point) considers he and ice king separate entities. They have pretty different personalities

Winter king is more like ice king than Simon:

* Physical stuff. Obviously. He's taller, has longer straighter hair, and is fucking bright blue+ still has evergreen's nose LOL. But also smaller stuff like the fact he dresses different and has different shaped glasses

* WAYYYYY more outgoing. Even before All That, Simon doesn't seem like the most outgoing guy. He would go on expeditions yes but could you imagine that guy throwing a party? No.

* Way more selfish and self absorbed. Which is in line with ice king, but now he's conventionally attractive so everyone else agrees. This is opposed to the fact Simon want to khs

* No consideration for PB. This is an interesting one, because it's the first departure from both our Simon and IK. Obviously ice king was terrible to PB LOL but like....he liked her.....because she was like betty..... And now Simon really respects her (and feels terrible about it.) while WK straight up does NOT care about her. Different from both, but closer to IK because he is a dickweed

* Deals with emotions differently than Simon. Seems to have completely blocked Betty out (assuming they were still close in this universe). And marceline bro... whatever happened there, ice marcy is the KID version of her. He has her bass, so she at least grew up and they've interacted. Maybe she saw him get "fixed" and was like.
Wow! You're not Simon!

* The name. Fionna's dream has the "ice prince", and that's what she calls Simon upon meeting him for the first time. If this was a True Simon, it would make more sense for him to be called the ice prince in universe, no? But he keeps the King title.

Simon spends a lot of the episode jealous of the winter king because he seems so well adiusted while he has the crown.

Simon has no magic, no nothing, but at least he has his brain back. The crown is very much directly linked to his loss of identity and to see WK be CONSCIOUS and LIKED and seemingly HIMSELF with magic is something he desperately wants especially at a time like this when his mental health is down the shitter while everyone talks about how much more fun he was when he was legitimately insane

The difference is that Simon spent every *conscious* moment FIGHTING the crown. Winter king is NOT fighting that shit. He says that he "conquered" it, but no you did not buddy. He is still dependent on it. He cannot survive without it. He just gave up. He's accepted that he's become one with it instead. So did ice king. Except without the madness of ice king, he can be a semi functional human being. He still gets the high of the crown and all its power, but this doesn't change the fact it Changed Who He IS.

Doesn't fucking matter rn becauee Simon hates himself and wants to be someone else but you get the idea. Winter king is just a version of Ice King LARPing as Simon. He can just do this way more convincingly even to himself because he can actually think now

Like “Betty? OH HAHA THE DEAD ONE” is an ice king ass reply and I swear to god at least part of the reason they didn’t get Tom Kenny to do his voice is because it would just be ice king’s voice again

also in regards to why candy queen is like that-Okay one, this goes with the name thing. Princess bubblegum. Normal. Candy Queen. Insane. Same as winter/ice king and ice prince. We cool?

Anyway

The Madness manifested in Simon/ice king in regards to Betty as romantic obsession. With the madness gone, CQ is the one feeling the brunt of these feelings- which would explain why Winter king doesn't remember feeling so Strongly about betty. Because Simon's feelings about her are naturally just fucking insane, it's so intertwined with the Madness that when that part is removed, so are any feelings towards Betty.

CQ is probably also obsessed with WK and "being together" because the sane part of her mind recognises that this madness is HIS and this is her fucked uo way of trying to like. Give it back.

That’s all I got