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nickywhoisi · 2 years ago

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Happy halloween gang!

Woo! Finally we are here! Since uploading my train gem art that makes my soul buzz with excite, I've been super eager to show all of you how serious I am about this project! I've practically been aggravated! I am so mad at myself for procrastinating on uploading! Wow! Now there's this really stupid issue with my laptop keyboard going on the fritz, and I've learned it's a hardware issue. I have to send it in for a while to get it fixed and I don't know how much it'll cost. Really afraid of what this may mean for my houseboat plans, which are even more important! O~O I am a little bit freaky-out-y again. But I'm not doing any o' that before giving you all what you were waiting for, and shouldn't have been made to wait so long for either. Here is a compilation of synopses and chapter ideas, called episodes, that tell you all you'll need to know about Thomas and friends in my fancy new au, and what goes on in the daily life of the crystal beings on Sodor. Now off I disappear again to play my vidyagames BECAUSE I GOT A NEW ONE NOW HA HA HA, GONNA LOSE MYSELF IN LUIGI'S MANSION 3 YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

Alot of these are-unfinished-as-i-still-havent-found-the-perfect-gemstone-for-each-engine-yet-but-i-will!-also-dont-mind-the-weird-dash-spaces-there-is-still-the-nonsense-going-on-with-my-keyboard-and-its-way-too-tiring-to-edit-rn-and-the-whole-thing-is-just-one-big-first-draft-so-its-all-gonna-look-wonky-i-have-to-go-clean-ok

Thomas - Kyanite 5.1 with a sparkle, always trying to prove his capability and uniqueness, tackling more things than he can actually handle, easily gets impatient (his plot arch is very similar to Phos during the beginning, except he actually likes the scholar job and he's good at it)

Lady - Gold unknown mohs level because she's made of flexible liquid gold material, the leader of the gems as she can literally extend her reach to support all of them and that kind of ability is respected as fuck

Toby - Dravite 7 Elizabeth - dark red gem Edward - undecided gem?

Henry - Verdelite 7.5, but he gets fused with another Gordon - Blue Diamond 10, has all of his usual pride and has to learn how to be more humble around everyone, but unlike Bortz, he does prove as more mature about certain matters all on his own, a more collected gordon James - Red Zircon 9.5, has remnants of Painite(black and red) marbling body, but pure red zircon in legs after the accident, has a fancy design on outer legs to be a show off to everyone Bertie - bright red gem Percy - undecided gem?

Bill and Ben - orange yellow gems Harold - white gem Duck - Duftite Emerald 7.8 mohs Diesel - Hematite Rose 6.5 Donald and Douglas - Almondine 7.2 Daisy - Despujolsite Boco - Duftite Alpha Mavis - something black and yellow Scotsman - dark green gem Oliver - GreenDemantoid 6.8 mohs Toad - dark grey gem Bulgy - red and yellow gem Derreck - dark green and yellow gem Rusty - Andesine or Zincite, is one of the gems on the winter cleanup crew, tasked with managing weather damage and cleaning off snow and ice Duncan - yellow gem Stepney - mustardy yellow gem

Proteus - Pale Yellow Spodumene 6.7 Duke - Amber Chalcedony 7 Skarloey - Unheated red orange Sapphire "HeatSaph" 6.3 Rheneas - Unheated red orange Sapphire "RedSaph" 6.3 Bertram - Brown Onyx 6.5 Smudger - Dark Green Natural Chrysoprase 6.6 "Freddy" - Moonstone 6.3 Falcon - Lapis Lazuli Stewart - Malachite Ferguson - Labradorite

{Episode ?, part 1, Kyanite is a useful gem}

Kyanite felt cross today, watching everyone pass by. How glorious they all seemed, their colours, their cuts, their hardness levels...all of what they were seemed to be woefully lost on him. He was a little blue gem of a 5 mohs hardness, which meant for him that he was not a gem strong enough to go out into battle, or patrols, or do anything very special with all of his friends. He thought himself a pitiably average gemstone with no special qualities to make him stand out like the rest. Kyanite was cross, indeed. He looked upon his own kind with jealousy, wishing that he were only more like them. "Ohh, what a lamentable fate I have...! Being made a small five when I know I can do so much more! I am a great gem, I know this! Yet...whatever can I do to prove it?" he thought to himself. "Now what's all this I hear, Kyanite?" A proud voice called out to him. It was Red Zircon, one of the most splendid gemstones of the island. He was much stronger than Kyanite, and it was but one of the many things that he boasted about to anyone who would listen; Zircon was also a rare gem, even among the other rare gems. Kyanite turned to see Red Zircon, and was taken aback by how stunning he looked. But then, he always looked so stunning in the light; as a brilliant red gem with a unique mixture of black stone in his body - he didn't recall what kind it was - and a pure red pattern along his long, slender, perfect legs. Red Zircon was one of the best gems around for a number of reasons, and he bloody well knew it too. With a flip of his shimmering, feathered, red gemstone hair, he questioned Kyanite. "You? A great gem who can do so much more? Good to hear you're reaching for the stars above, but...that's going to be awfully hard to accomplish as such a small and pitiably frail little gem, now don't you think?" Red Zircon said to him with an equally playful and condescending tone, with an amused smirk to go with it.

Kyanite gave a stern look at him. He would not stand for such slander! He got up to meet him face to face...which was a bit of a challenge as Red Zircon was taller than him, on top of it. And Kyanite always felt so embarassed at looking an exemplary gemstone in the eyes; something about their glow was too blinding to him. This was something that personally ground Kyanite's gears as well; for a long time, he had always hoped that gems were capable of growing up to be tall and strong, as he did not like how small he was...but Pink Tourmaline had to tell him the bad news that he would be stuck at not only the strength and colour, but the height he was formed with for his whole life. Only their leader, Lady Gold, had the ability to change her height; though not often, it was but one of the incredible things she could do. Poor Kyanite found himself quite envious of these perfect gems, blessed with the things he could only long for, and so he used that spite to drive his message forward to Red Zircon. "Now l-listen here, Zircon! I didn't intend for you to be eavesdropping on me. And furthermore, you ought to be believing me instead of scoffing!" Zircon backed off a bit and said, "Oh ho ho! Oh, little Kyanite, there's no need for those sharp edges!" In our human vernacular, it would be like he was saying 'no need to show your fangs'. "I didn't mean to insult, you know that." Kyanite was thrown off momentarily at this shift. He was unsure, and still a bit miffed at him. "Oh no? You didn't...?" He replied, "Why, of course not. Wouldn't dream of it!" This left Kyan changing his mood a bit, wondering if maybe he was overreacting somehow? He brought his manners out instead. "Oh...um, well, okay..."

Red Zircon continued, "I've heard you go on and on for quite a while about your lamentable state, you know. All I was really doing was pointing out your - if you'll forgive me and I'm sure you will - glaringly obvious shortcomings, to remind you of what you're truly fighting against. That being...yourself." He finished his line with a dramatic, controlled, emphasizing pointing, right at Kyanite's round little nose. He got the hint right away, and was left to feel miffed all over again. "...O-oh. I see. And is that supposed to make me feel better over my situation, then?" He glumly questioned the taller gem, arms crossed. Zircon thought briefly and replied, "Um, I don't think so? I couldn't possibly imagine anyone who would be happy about their failings! Good grief, how bizarre would that be?" Kyanite's emotional state was worsening with each remark that came from Red Zircon, and he tried his best to hold back his snippiness...to a limited success. His arms were still crossed as he asked, "Well in that case...Zircon, don't suppose you could stop rubbing it in my face for a moment, and tell me if you know of any way I can overcome my...shortcomings, as you say?" Admittedly, Kyanite was embarrassed at himself for drawing blanks, plan-wise. As frustrated as he was, he genuinely did not know what to do, which is why he was seeking help in the first place. Zircon brought his finger to his cheek as he went into thinking of how to answer Kyanite. "Hmm...my my my, that's a tough question. I mean, where to begin? Perhaps at your cut? Your hardness along with that? Your drab colours? Your height? Your clothing style? Your attitude? Your overall mood? Your entire personality? Your--?" At hearing all of this...cruel opinion onslaught, Kyanite was very shocked and indignant. He did NOT like to get so raked in this way, and wanted no more of it! Quite desperately, he interrupted the other's comments. "Okay! Okay! Stop that, y-you...!!" Zircon secretly delighted in knowing how riled up he could make the smaller gem. Unfair, yet he thought it a fun game all the same, so he continued on. "Oh, my, yes...we'd have to have a complete overhaul of you. Each category is abysmally lacking, as you are now."

Kyanite absolutely hated this, as he looked at Red Zircon with such a struggled, strained and defeated expression. The poor little gem had had enough. What is this?! He wanted help, not to feel so personally attacked; and over everything he couldn't possibly know how to change! He wanted so badly to just snap his fingers, make Zircon go away, and make all of these problems get instantly fixed, like that. Now he went from royally pissed off to depressed, and definitely too insulted to even find the words to get back at the red gem. But that was finally, finally when Red Zircon noticed that perhaps he really was going too far, seeing little Kyanite almost ready to release tears. Red Zircon’s eyes went from lazy to widened, like that. He didn't actually want to do this to the other gem! He only thought it was a bit of cheeky banter and nothing serious...but the one he was chatting with reacted in a way that certainly indicated otherwise. Collecting himself from his self-induced shame, Red Zircon used his hand to gingerly bring Kyanite's face to see his, and very smoothly added, "...But, in the matters of cut and hardness, there may yet be hope for you. I know of a very simple solution to that!"

Kyanite lit up at that last sentence, seeing that Red Zircon was genuinely sorry for what he was doing and really was trying to be helpful. "...Ah! Yes?! What might that be?" "Oh ho ho ho! Why, silly little Kyanite, have you forgotten already? When you assisted me in getting back to the Shed after that nasty accident? I was fixed up with pure red zircon crystal so that I look better than ever before!" He made a little pose with his legs, for emphasis. “And I can move around at unmatchable speeds too! I can simply do it all now~!" But just before he went on a tangent about himself and all of his best qualities...Red Zircon caught himself and kept to the point. "And so that is the solution I see fit for you, Kyanite. Reconstructive surgery. You should figure out how to be rebuilt into a grander gem! Simple, isn't it~?"

Kyanite considered Red Zircon's idea, and slowly, it became very enticing indeed. "Why, yes...! Of course! Reconstructive surgery! Why didn't I think of that?!" Right in the midst of his pleasant imaginings, and the promise of his dream having a way to come true, Kyan had a sudden epiphany or two enter his mind that apparently put a new damper on the whole. He went from being greatly enthusiastic, to hesitant and doubtful. "...Aah, no, wait. You make it all sound so simple, yes, but...how do I go about this?" Red Zircon gave Kyanite an incredulous look. "Eh? What do you mean 'how do you go about this'?" Where was this coming from? Kyanite did his best to explain. "I mean, isn't there a whole process to it? Like...um...for instance, how do I find the right gemstone for me to be infused with? Hm? How do I achieve this when I am not sturdy enough to venture out on my own? And with all of those monsters out there..." "...Ah. Well...yes. That is true. You would need to find a..." Zircon was growing more wide-eyed as he was wrapped up in his own realization; Kyanite was right. "...Oh. And be durable already, now that I think on it. B-but surely that can still be done? There could be one out there just right for you, yes?"

Kyanite continued. "And, even if there is, even if I did manage it, what would I have to do then? Have myself shattered just to make [Mavis] and the others perform surgery on me?" "Well, I don't understand how you can focus so much on all the negatives, when I just gave you a solution to your problem! For goodness' sake! How can you not just be grateful?! And how can you not try it out and see, hm?!" "Zircon! Don't you think I've tried going on my own already?! It doesn't work! Or have you forgotten all of my repair trips?! Have you no care for how...hard this is for me?!" "Kyanite, I wasn't talking about...I-I haven't forgotten! Now didn't you want help, or not?!" "Mmm...! ...Well...yes, I did. But...you can think of these things because you're already protected by your hardness! You can already...do these things that I...can't." "...Oh. Wait, you mean...oh no. Oh no! Do you mean I'm making it worse by speaking so plainly?" Kyanite nodded, looking very glum indeed. Red Zircon realized that maybe he actually did forget how his plight affects the little one. Red Zircon didn't need to worry much as a 9.5 but had no perspective of what life as a brittle 5 is like. He just humbly said, "Oh, good grief...perhaps I didn't realize what this all means to you. I do sincerely apologize, Kyanite. I am not being as splendid as I should be, now am I?"

Kyanite thought that last remark Red Zircon gave was funny, in an endearing way. He smiled a little more at that, and showed the other that he was feeling a little better now. "Thank you. I'm sorry too. I just have a lot to consider as a five, is all. I don't want to have an...attitude. I just can't stand being so frail!" "Sakes. That does sound awful. ...In that case, I think what you need to do first is find someone who would take you to go find your gem part. I would simply love to go right now and help you, Kyanite, really! It would be lovely to repay you for your helping me back then, but I'm afraid it's almost noon! I will need to go patrolling soon with (Edward)! I just have no time to spare, you see." "Oh...really? Ugh, that's a shame. Who might I turn to, then?" "Not sure. Why not ask around? That's what I would do. My goodness, I am just full of good ideas today, aren't it~? I know~!" "Heh heh, yes, yes. Well thank you very much, anyway, Zircon! These are good ideas! And this could be it...! I'll get onto the search right away! See you!" "Good luck, little Kyanite! You'll need it out there~!"

#zomg my art!#tt #k #choo choo groop #tttei\#ttte #wri\#my writings #fanfic

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life-rewritten · 4 years ago

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SPOOKY SEASON! An ode to Mo Dao Zu Shi: one of the best BL story created!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!! One last Halloween post and it's about one of my favourite pieces of media in the world of BL, romance, and supernatural stories. Roll your eyes because once again I'm talking about Mo Dao Zu Shi (The grandmaster of demonic cultivation) I mean already with the demons, and cultivation is already hinting why this is Halloween themed, and trust me MDZ has much more than that: from zombies to ghosts, to magical instruments and weapons, and we love our fantasy cultivation sects and clans. Anyhoo, I am here to write a fun post another verdict/review on each of the adaptations available so far for MDZ, yeh you heard me I've listened, read and watched all versions of this masterpiece, and I'm here to tell you to go and do the same for Halloween. Also in case, you haven't heard MTX (the author of MDZ) has another show on its way TODAY! And that's the magnificent, the excellent and incredible Heaven's Official Blessing after marathoning MDZ do that too.

As always with my verdicts: we have ratings: From 1 to 5 (1 being least excited to watch, 5 being most,) how excited am I to delve into these again?

Country: China Genre: Danmei, Supernatural, Action, Fantasy, Romance, Comedy, BL, Horror,

1.The Book

We begin with the one that started it all. The reason for my devotion and love for this world, for Wei Wuxian and Lan Wang Ji. My heart hasn't stopped loving this book experience. And at first, it wasn't easy to understand all the logic and terms needed to know for this world of cultivation and sects and clans, and magical skills. But once I got the hang of it (maybe after reading it three times I wonder how I had time to do this by the way), this is a book that I keep on returning to, crying to, and just breaking down into a mess too. This book is the most original source for the love story of Wangxian and to be honest its a masterpiece. Now onto the pros and cons, I guess about this adaptation.

Pro:

First, I would say that this is the most non censored version of MDZ, meaning China couldn't mute the romance or delete scenes because it's the original written story. The romance between Wangxian stands out and makes your heart go through a lot of emotions, from frustration at Wei Wuxian not realising how he feels for Wang Ji, to pain because of Wang Ji's perceived unrequited feelings for so long, to happiness when they're just together, to confusion at some drunk scenes and then to all-out shock as the story reveals its self to the villains, the background of Weiying's death and more.

The introduction to all these characters, all of them have a role in the story, all of them are important to keep an eye on, and they all grow and develop throughout the story as we find out more about their circumstances and their own perspective on Wei Wuxian.

Cons but not actual cons

The book is longggggg. The first time I read it I wondered when we would finally get a resolution or hint that Wei Wuxian finally understands what he's been feeling for sooo long, but it took forever and to be honest even though this is a con to me, it also is a positive for those who love slowwwww burns, and slow reveal to the background and development of Wangxians feelings for each other. There are many missions although essential to the world-building and the actual plot/mystery that at first seem so useless and not needed, but they are there for a purpose, and they do help us find out more clues about what's been going on and why Wei Wuxian was brought back from the dead.

The book is the most non censored version of MDZ, and so there are many questionable moments/questions about Non-consent that occur during moments when Wangxian are drunk. Honestly, these scenes are so weird to me, because they hold so much truth and revelations to Wangji's feelings for Weiying. After all, he's drunk and the most authentic version of himself. There are so many moments (like stealing chickens or showing him the bunnies) that make you just want to cry at his love Weiying and the pain he had to endure when he thought he was never coming back. Still, at the same time, there are many moments where you're like oh wow that escalated, and you feel just a tad discomfort at the idea of the non-con. But like I said these scenes are required for these two to really like give into what they've both been trying to push away or ignore, and it's nice to see how Weiying reacts to his feelings becoming uncontrollable and more prominent.

There are some moments in the book where things seem vague or unexplained (which the other sources did their own thing with), some characters who are mentioned but not really given enough detail, some plot details where it's not fully understood. However, I do think that because the book is already so long, the most critical information needed was there and the reveal of the mysteries were all done well. I think though that it's better to see how it materialises visually hence the other media adaptations.

Ratings: 4/5 -It's not easy to pick up the book and read, but I have so much fun returning to it and laughing along with Wei Wuxian's thoughts and ideas about Wang Ji.

2.The Manhua

I was so shook when I found out MDZ has a manhua. Mostly because China wouldn't really make it easy for the book adaptation to be honestly portrayed visually. But the manga shocked me, it is censored, but the writers and the artists are all so obsessed with this book and this couple that despite having to remove or edit some scenes, they draw some additional scenes and post it online so that international fans can still get to see these moments visually. That is incredible, and I'm so grateful that we have a team of people who respect and love the piece as much as the fans do.

Pros:

With any graphic novel/manga the art of MDZ is fantastic to see, the characters are brought to life with colour and also the inclusion of chibi drawings to make a moment incredibly cute or funny. Weiying is very naughty, so a chibi drawing of him makes us see him like how he's acting a child. I enjoy the manhua of MDZ so much, and I love how they drew each of the characters and the world.

Cons but not really cons:

I think, however, there are better visual sources for MDZ available that is more detailed in terms of characters and includes more information about the world-building. The plot also has to be condensed as well because you can't draw everything from the book. The manhua is also still in the works so, its a very slow upload and it will take years for it to be completed. But this is understandable, and I can't wait to read the full completed copy. If you hate reading and can't stand words, I think the manhua version is for you!

Ratings: 3.5/5 -It’s the waiting that lowered the ratings for me and the fact that I prefer other sources but I’m so grateful for the manhua.

3.The Show

The one that brought international fans like swarms to this story. Untamed shocked all of us in the BL community as the first time we heard about it, sure it was nice to see that Yibo was cast as Wang Ji, but even then his acting wasn't that profound or praised so we didn't care, and Zhan also seemed like an interesting choice for out Weiying. I think there were an outrage and confusion when we heard this was going to be censored and a bromance. It felt like it made no sense because there's no way really to edit the relationship and love of Wangxian, so people went into the show resentful and worried. But after 20 episodes, the anger, worry and upset were erased. Untamed is a masterpiece, and it blows my mind how censored it is but still not really censored? It deletes the questionable moments in the book but adds the essential parts even where we get to see Wang Ji's feelings (Though obviously not mentioned as feelings but respect). We get to watch Weiying realise how much he cherishes whatever he has with Wang Ji and how much he misunderstood the latter, and how much Wang Ji cared for him. The show as Netflix says is not about just friends. Still, it emphasises the connection between these two using subtext clues and symbolisms, and visual metaphors to make sure the audience knows that these two are soulmates and are meant for each other. Here are the other pros and cons of the show:

Pros:

The acting is incredible, like so good and I can't think of two people who were more suited for Wangxian, Yibo shocked me as Wang Ji because although I knew him (because of Kpop), I didn't really think he would pull of stoic but still vulnerable Wang Ji. He was good at showing the emotions of love and longing that has been connected with Wang Ji. Zhan was an excellent Wuxian, he made me smile, he made laugh, he made me so happy because of his mischievous aura, but he also played serious and emotional and resentful Wuxian well as well. I keep crying every time I see the death scene in the show because it's just so done well.The directors and producers who didn't care about hiding the relationship between these two, they still wanted to be respectful to the writer and the source, and they still wanted to show as much as possible that these two loved each other. For that, I'm so grateful and they did a brilliant job with what they could. The character arcs and development and depth; Its the way they took the other characters from the book and fleshed them out giving each of them more depth, more understanding, more dimensionality and more story connecting to our plot, and it broke my heart how much I loved everyone in this show. The actors all performed so well, and some gave me goosebumps at how well they portrayed their characters (Xue Yang!!) like stunning and just a great cast.The storyline was also written in an innovative way, the flashbacks were first shown to the audience, how Wangxian became Wangxian and so the audience felt every single hurt and pain that Wang Ji was feeling. We understood why he acted the way he did. The flashbacks also provided plot structure to the mystery and the actual plot of the show, it left clues, and we watched the villains become villains (secretly), we saw how some characters grew. Each of the arcs in the book was told in a way that it flowed together and made sense. Due to this way of structuring the plot the show became so much more profound in the way it messed with our emotions, every death mattered, and every character had their own story and importance to the audience.

Cons:

The censorship. I've praised how they overcame it, but it's still there, the ending of the show was done this way because of censorship and to be honest I still think everyone should read the book because there are moments where the romance of Wangxian is fun and memorable to see (the confession scene whilst it was done okay in the show because of censorship it doesn't hold as much oomph as it did in the book. Mainly because the events that happened before it was already so filled with angst and drama and the results of the confession Wangxian clinging onto each other despite being in danger is a must-see, the censorship is annoying because it shouldn't be there, it's something that whilst it did help with some stuff, it still feels like an insult to the piece, and it still doesn't sit well with me that China censors their BL. So its a con.

Ratings 5/5 I think I could spend so much time breaking down why Untamed is a masterpiece BL show, but all I can say is despite 50 episodes (longgg) it is worth the time and effort and if you watch BL, go see it.

4.The Audio

The audio for the MDZ is like my favourite thing in the world. I love Chinese audiobook dramas; it's an incredible experience to listen to. With MDZ, this is what the show would be if it wasn't censored. The actors for the audio drama are amazing, and I love them so much. The audio drama is three seasons with some extra scenes and it's incredible if you don't want to read the book, then just watch and listen to the audio drama because its the same story but its brought to life by the acting and storytelling. Also though there are some scenes removed, I think the audio drama is the next uncensored gem of MDZ that shows Wangxian's romance the best way possible. I squeal, and I laugh, and again I cry at every single moment; their first kiss, the inn scene, the confession (i spend time pausing it just to cry at how good it is) and more. I just love it, and I prefer it to reading the book. Other pros and cons:

Pros:

The story is structured and told properly, follows all the arcs and events in the book and brings them life by voice acting, and the music is incredible. It's nice to listen to and hear Weiying's thoughts and to also listen to an audible version of the book. The audio drama has all the pros from the book as well.

Cons:

Nothing much to say about the cons. It is not easy to attain the audio drama in English subs, its hard to download and store it, but once you overcome that it's great. I think the audio drama is the most difficult to obtain.

Ratings: My favourite adaptation 5/5

5.The Donghua

Lastly, we have the Donghua or the anime version of MDZ. What can I say about this, its brilliant, masterpiece, it's gorgeous. If you think the art for the manhua is good, the donghua takes it to a different level. The visuals are stunning, the animation is breath-taking, and the story is again following Untamed ways of censoring the story but making sure it doesn't remove the romantic connotations and symbolism to Wangxian. The donghua also follows Untameds way of starting with flashbacks to explain what happened to Weiying before it started. I have nothing else to say about how great this is. It's the same thing I've been saying about all these adaptations. The donghua though is the best visual masterpiece for MDZ, in my opinion.

Pros;

Packed full with symbolism and clues to the plot, it's detailed so well for the storyline and its an excellent way to tell this story. The music and ost for the donghua are also beautiful and gets me emotional each time I hear it.

Cons:

Censorship. That's it, that's what it always is. For me, I think the donghua is the most censored version of MDZ? Or maybe I just feel that way despite the subtext clues; I do feel irritated at the censorship in the donghua. Let's pray Heaven's official blessing overcomes that.

Ratings: 3.8/5 - I love it so much because of the visuals but apart from that I prefer other sources for MDZ. Still the best donghua that exists.

So here you have in an in-depth and messy conversation about one of my favourite media pieces to existing right now in BL. I think I will never stop singing praises at MXT for creating this story and I think there's nothing else I rather do than just spend times when I need a distraction watching, listening or reading this story again and again. What about you all. What do you feel about MDZ? What pros and cons do you have for each adaptation? Which is your favourite. And have you been able to get any rest when we know that Heaven's official blessing is out TODAY!! Let me know your thoughts. Happy Halloween, Enjoy it.

#mo dao zu shi #the untamed #mdzs #wrpup #FVete #october #halloween #wei ying #wei wuxain #lan wangji #mdzs donghua #wwx #lwj #chen qing ling #cql #bl series #danmei

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2idiots · 5 years ago

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Keep Yourself Alive

pt. 6 // pt. 7 // pt. 8a

word count: 1,667ish

NCT Frat Social Media AU // College Athlete & Fratboy Lucas x reader

warnings: not really any, kind angsty, more than just mentions of chronic pain

(I don't know how but the second paragraph got deleted when I first uploaded. I have since added it in. So if you see something new that's why)

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Getting Johnny from outside the building to inside your room was a lot more difficult than you expected. This was partially because your best friend was much drunker than his texts suggested and partially because each step was sending a pain reverberating down your legs and up your abdomen. A pain that you knew the mild over-the-counter pain meds would do little to numb but you had taken them with false hope anyway. Before your best friend had forced you into letting his drunkass in you were curled into your bed with a heating pad pressed into your abdomen, hoping eventually exhaustion would win over excruciating pain.

This was the real reason you bolted out of Jet Lag the minute your friends were off in different directions distracted. The pain had triggered before Mark's open mic night started but you were not about to miss the night you friend had been talking about for weeks. This was so important to him and you had to be there. So you sucked it up and promised yourself to duck out the moment it was clear and Mark had performed. Woo noticing and staying over for a few hours was just a welcomed surprise. And the leftover baked goods he brought were another plus side, not that you had any appetite. At least your blubbering fool of a friend would benefit from the pile of pastries sitting on your desk, if you could make it past the giggling desk attendant.

The first time you walked passed her with bleary eyes, focused on only the task ahead she called out something about the “cute Oppa” at the door. Immediately a gag raced up your throat at that, Johnny? A cute Oppa? Gross. He was like your brother, actually more like your overprotective mother. Sure you joked about Johnny being a daddy, but it was all shits and giggles to make him mad with Mark. He wasn't actually one. The second time she made some sort of pass at him that you blocked out and stifled another gag. You didn’t need to see or hear that child making passes at your best friend.

That wasn’t the only thing she was giggling at though. You and Johnny were quite the sight. He was a stumbling, stuttering fool and you were wearing pajamas that had been picked out in the dark, not even your shoes matched. These were things you had thrown on when Johnny begged you to let him in but your headache was pounding too much to turn the lights on, which was also the reason for the sunglasses.

Speaking of Big Foot, he was using you almost completely as a support and he weighed a lot more than his bony ass looked. How he managed to make it to your building from 7th Sense was beyond you, he could barely make it three steps without giggling and sliding around. Honestly this made you more than a little nervous for Mark, usually he was the giggly one after a few drinks. If Johnny was this drunk, then Mark could very well be dead.

Overall the hardest obstacle for Johnny to maneuver around was your actual room. He tripped over everything. Maybe it was his long spindly legs combined with the alcohol, but he even fell just trying to walk over your rug. You had to catch him before he face planted. Of course he just contiuned blabbering about the night and how well it went the whole time, even while laughing at his clumsiness. “Then Mark fell! Kinda like how he is falling for sunflower boy but like fell… on the actual ground… like how I just almost fell!” To which you just nodded, handing him a pastry and an ice cold water bottle. “And Jae was so funny, he was talking about the basketball team and one of their parties last week where someone drank beer from a ball that had been cut in half. Isn’t that gross?”

“Yeah babe, real gross,” You nodded, trying to push him toward your bed. You might not have been asleep before he messaged but you were still in bed ready to sleep and you wanted to be back there. “Can you get in bed, Jojo? I'll tired.”

Following your direction like a lost lamb, Johnny swiftly removed all his out layers and climbed into your bed continuing to talk about the basketball team and how pretty and funny they were, all the while giving you very pointed looks. Or at least he was prattling on until he went completely silent and tense before screeching, “THERE’S SOMETHING WARM!”

Arms crossed and irritation pulsed through you at the scream, you leaned over to pull the heating pad out from under him and wiggled it around in your outstretched hand, “Johnny you’ve met HP before, HP meet Big Foot.”

“HP? You named your heating pad?” He questioned already snuggling back into your sheets like he owned the bed. This happened every time he was over, sober or drunk it didn’t matter; Johnny took up every blanket and pillow in your entire bed: partially because his size, mostly because he was an asshole. One of the many reasons you were hesitant to let him stay over anymore, even though you always ended up letting him stay.

“Might as well, he’s in my bed so often,” You grinned before grabbing another water bottle out of the mini fridge in the corner of the room and tossing it his direction. While this wasn’t a common occurrence, drunk Johnny, you did know that he would wake up in three hours whining about a dry mouth and you didn't want to deal with it.

“I mean he wasn’t on Halloween.” Luckily you flipped the lights off before you could see his suggestive eyebrow wiggle. Here was the worst part, talkative drunk Johnny taking an interest in your life and trying to lay down his tips on life.

Grabbing an extra blanket for yourself you slid in next to him and laughed that thought off, “Actually HP was, ALSO I thought we agreed to not talk about Halloween, leave the past behind us and all.”

“Behind us? Is that how you like it y/n?” He let out a slight whimper when you turned over enough to give him a solid kick to the shin. This alcohol was giving him far more confidence than normal and you didn’t like it. Throwing his hands up, Johnny tossed out a worthless apology and whined, “I deserved that ok. But you know I wouldn’t call it the past, don’t you tutor the dude?”

That elicited a quiet response from you, a simple, “Yeah.”

“Isn’t it like two or three times a week?” He didn’t stop his incessant babbling long enough for you to answer, adding on, “You’re quite popular, my friends keep asking about you too.” Then a switch suddenly flipped in Johnny’s mind, evident by how he practically climbed over you to switch the lamp back on and give you his best mom glare, “Wait, you’re sleeping with HP?” You let out a few weak protests as the light flooded your room and his bony ass arm squished you down into the bed digging into your side. Drunk friends sucked. Too bad you loved them too much to leave them on the street. “So you’re in pain? You’re in pain and you didn’t say anything? You just went home alone and lied to Mark and me?”

“Johnny I always sleep with a heating pad and I’m always in pain. It's not a big deal.” Tonight just happened to be bad, still was, but you left that part out. “Also Jungwoo just left; I wasn’t alone.” That was accompanied by a successful effort to push him off so you could flip the light off again and snuggle into the heating pad again. “Now go to sleep, I'm tired.”

There was a brief moment of silence before you heard sniffling and an occadsional shuffle.

“Are you crying?” You asked incredulously, flipping over to see him hastily wiping away his tears in the ambient light filtering in through the window. Sure enough, your bitch-ass best friend was laying on the other side of the bed using his white undershirt to wipe his tears away. At least he was smart enough not to use your sheets as the tissue. “Stop crying.” This was new. Your friends probably knew way too much about how hard your days were getting, in fact Johnny had driven you to the ER one too many times over the past year and a half, but they had never cried in front of you. At least not about you.

You hated it.

His immediate response was denial, no he wasn’t crying. These weren’t tears, they were allergies. "Leaks in my face." But you still heard him mutter a muted “I just want you to be happy and not in pain” as the alcohol running through his system finally knocked him out.

You were struck silent, not sure how to respond. Sure he was your closest friend and that meant he had to like you, but this affection made breathing a little hard: your chest not quite expanding like it should. You felt a warm tear roll down your cheek as you turned to face the other side of the room, an effort to get away. This was exactly why you didn't tell them about tonight, you didn't want them burdened with your pain. They should have to suffer just because you were.

Ignoring the ache in your chest, you blindly reached out for where you set your phone on the bedside table. You still may not be able to sleep but you could get some reading done and maybe forget the sound of Johnny's tears. And maybe, just maybe, the words would lull you into some dreamlike state so you could rest. It was only a few minutes into reading that a text interrupted the chapter.

summary: College is hard enough, right? Coursework, two jobs, a social life, and the state of your mental health. As if that was enough now the school’s no.1 athlete won’t leave you alone after a one night stand. And maybe you like him back but you have a tendency to run when life gets too difficult especially now that undiagnosed chronic pain just seems to be getting worse with each passing month.

(I've decided updates will be Thursday at 6pm. I hope you enjoy this chapter)

Taglist: @princeofshenzhenuwus

#nct imagines #nct social media au #nct xuxi #lucas nct #lucas nct imagines #wayv yukhei #wayv imagines #wayv social media au #wayv x reader #wong yukhei #yukhei imagines #yukhei x reader

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myrmidryad · 4 years ago

Note

In my opinion, Shadow Work is not only one of the best Roswell NM fanfics, it’s one of the best sci-fi/fantasy types of stories I’ve ever read. The scope of it, the imagery, the pacing, the world-building, the intimacy, the many different themes... it’s incredible. How, how, how did you write this??? Like, did you map it out? Did you use a laptop or other device to write on? What was the editing process like, etc.? Like, no detail is too small, ha. In case you can’t tell, I LOVE THIS STORY!

Ngl, I think it helped that it was the only thing I worked on for three solid months, and it’s all set over a very short space of time, so it was fairly easy to keep everything that happens in it clear in my head. If I’m writing something long like that, it’s easy to lose track of stuff. Also there was a big reshuffle going on at work, so it was easy to get away with writing at work because no one cared what anyone else was doing. Stressful, but very handy! And I was absolutely fixed on finishing by Halloween. So I wrote everything on my laptop at home, and my laptop at work, sending myself updated versions of the document over email as word docs.

My editing process tends to involve more growing than pruning 😂 The original story was like...20k I think, ish. The beginning was the same, but Michael and Alex rescued Isobel and Max much quicker and there was a bigger showdown with Jesse and Project Shepherd at the site the Air Force had built out at the Foster Ranch. But then I got just past the confrontation and just...didn’t like it. It felt too rushed, there wasn’t enough emotional impact, and I wanted more actual spooky content, so I went back to Alex and Michael meeting in Las Cruces and started adding stuff from there, and then added more, and more, and stretched out their investigation, and brought in Maria, and then Kyle, and Mimi, and I know there’s people who say you can tell any story in under 100k but no you can’t! I couldn’t have fit all of that in in under 100k, and it wouldn’t have been as good. I needed to stretch out Alex and Michael’s time together for Alex to get really twisted up in his feelings, and having more time meant more time for more spooky stuff too. And the themes just sort of developed on their own. I didn’t set out to consciously mirror Alex’s trauma responses in his haunt sensitivity, but it sort of happened anyway, and it worked! And with other stuff...since I made the haunts so related to location and land, it made sense to tie in a little of Alex’s native heritage. I’ve always been interested in the differences and similarities between the pod squad’s experience on Earth, being completely cut off from their culture and having no choice but to assimilate, and the real life groups of people that’s actually happened to, Native Americans included. When so much of your culture is lost, how do you even react to that? But in like, practical terms, I just wanted to have enough stuff for Alex and Michael to do to stretch out their time together to give them time to get inextricably attached.

And then in my final edits before I uploaded the chapters I usually added more stuff there too, like extra spooky stuff or extra smut. 😂 Or just stuff like more descriptions of the places they were in, making sure I was describing the weather, the way the sky looked, all of that.

Almost all my fics get planned out in bullet points on evernote before I start them. With Shadow Work, having a certain amount of things happening each day made that pleasantly easy. I also wrote out the scale Alex uses to measure haunt activity. But it’s all in bullet point format, one event following the next, this happens, they feel like this, this happens, this happens, and on and on. I don’t think I had any details past Alex and Michael rescuing Max and Isobel planned until I was already in the thick of writing, other than that I knew Jesse had to die, and I had to figure out how Project Shepherd wouldn’t come after the pod squad. So I’m like a semi-planner, semi-gardener type writer I guess.

I uhhhhh went off a bit there, but you asked about it! 😂 Thank you so much!

#shadow work #Anonymous #asks

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dramaphan · 5 years ago

Text

It’s late, but here is: a live reaction to Phil’s second live show

-“I hope you’ve been fed and watered” no Phil we haven’t you don’t make content anymore

-Philip were you about to make a joke about your chocolate bar containing children

-I’m really not sure how to feel about the half black half brown hair thing but like we’ll see

-Stop whispering at me. Christ.

-I can’t believe you missed out on an opportunity to call that person y’arr-eth. Like a pirate.

-“sorry if I decline your message, I’m-“ blah blah excuse we know you’re denying the gaming channel ones

-“oh it looks like I died” and other instances of Phil not testing shit before he goes live

-it’s craw-sant you buffoon

-Gideon. I think I’ve only ever seen that name written down because I thought it was pronounced the same as pigeon

-plot twist: you actually were meant to take the cake but everyone thought it was art and whoever brought the cake went home sad.

-I am 9 minutes into this show and I’ve seen 4 ads already can you please give me my ass back

-oh my god they’ve got shrimp what nerds

-Phil why do you pretend that normancam is live you fool nobody

-he’s gone full fucking aquarium expert he was gonna have a whole other separate tank just for his dinky shrimp what a ridiculous fucking man I love him

-“Snails are super horny” I hate him

-all these fuckin segments. The editing. The production value. How much is younow paying his ass

-Phil I’m sorry but you would make a terrible news anchor get to the pOINT

-why the hell did this story make the news

-Angry Mums™️ sounds like a tv show I’d be into I love pain

-16 minutes in. Literally only a third of the way through, and I’ve now seen 6 ads. Can Phil fucking chill out for one second you’re already rich

-is it not a normal thing to just chill at a friends house while they’re in the shower?

-honestly real talk don’t ever be embarrassed by your parents doing weird shit in front of your crush because if y’all actually get serious that’s gonna be their in-laws and they’re gonna have to live with it so get them adjusted now.

-grad gown with a furry lining. My brain automatically went “ah yes, graduating from pimp school”

-amari really hit the nail on the head with this one. I can never think of embarrassing stories because they’re all buried deep down in the darkest parts of my psyche.

-look at Norman’s little butt wiggles I die

-Do Dan and Phil pass out candy to trick or treaters on Halloween and if not can I kick their ass

-who tf is having pride in October

-Granny Phannies. Who are you and how do I delete your group chat

-Martyn used to have red hair and get chased by geese. Not sure how those things are related but thank you for sharing

-geese aren’t even the weirdest pets I once knew someone who had a porcupine as a house pet.

-yes Phil geese can fly. The Canada variety does it every year. It’s a big deal.

-my seventh ad just appeared. I’m going to commit a crime

-“the gayest mouse ever” alright

-“a gay mouse for a gay rat” followed by the most absolutely unamused thank you I’ve ever heard in my life

-public spice latte

-holy shit I also had a hamster called mouse does this mean me and Phil are friends

-whichever room the streaming setup is in, is a mess. I will avoid any theories as to why that might be.

-at least Phil had a few different clips for this Norman cam instead of trying to fool us into thinking the same clip on loop was live

-Phil those are seagulls in what world do those look like geese

-“I love the apprentice, not the Donald trump one” wow Phil you’re getting awfully political

-the poopoo chat 69. Some of y’all don’t deserve group chats

-Phil has an occasional drag queen friend and in other news I now know what my dream amazingphil video would be

-maybe Red Squirrel can be your drag name

-“shall I just upload a 24 hour video of Norman’s tank” yes. The only correct answer to that is yes

-“those boob women” Phil where’s your respect

-“eye boobs”

-we’re back on embarrassing parents and I’ve had a flashback to every single time my mother had to interact with a customer service person. Literal worst nightmare.

-oh my god now I’m having flashbacks to my mother listening in on every single phone call I ever had and then confronting me about the stuff I talked about with my friends. Having a mother was a mistake.

-Phil, maybe your mum didn’t ruin your movie date with that girl but I’m sure there was a much more pressing reason it didn’t work out

-and it ended. Just like that.

Final thoughts: I don’t know if I’m gonna be able to sit through these live shows every week but gosh darn it I’ll try.

#phan #amazingphil #dan and phil #lessamazingphil #phil lester

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panda-noosh · 6 years ago

Text

Those Bells Aren’t For Us {James x Reader}

Words: 8k

Summary: Being single when you worked as a wedding photographer was a constant punch to your confidence. You're thankful whenever you come across a certain best man who has the same views on weddings as you do.

Genre: fluff – angst

Warning: James is a lil shit

Notes: masterlist – I missed a Halloween upload because October has been unforgiving, so please take this as compensation.

---

You were beginning to despise the colour white.

A crisp white, a white that reminded people of purity and clouds. The type of colour that was seen in advertisements for fluffy bed sheets, or fancy shampoo that had no right being that smooth.

Or, the colour that dominated weddings.

That's where you saw it most of all, and perhaps the setting had something to do with why you hated the colour so much – it was just so prominent, the only thing you ever really saw nowadays.

Being a photographer for weddings was a job you had never seen yourself being involved in. In university, you had enjoyed taking candid photos of people – that was your speciality. Unsuspecting passers-by, catching pure and raw emotions on peoples faces as they threw their heads back in laughter, completely unaware to you capturing every moment of said happiness.

After leaving university, though, you had been forced into a stand-still. Nobody wanted to hire you. Nobody knew how to hire you – did they just pay you to stand in a corner and take photos of people who didn't even want their photos taken? Did they just set you up outside of a shop and ask you to take pictures of the people walking in?

No. The only place anybody could think to put your photography skills to use was at weddings, and that was exactly where you had wound up.

It had been fun in the beginning. Back when you were young and carefree, unable to overthink something as simple as a wedding. But as time passed and the job became more of a chore than anything else, you were given more and more time to think of your place amongst these events and that was when you had started looking at the colour white like it was something to be angry at.

It most likely started after Keith had broken up with you. Yes. That was definitely it.

Keith Kogane had once been the man that you saw yourself spending the rest of your life with. Call you crazy, a hopeless romantic, but Keith and you had been together for over four years and you had been completely and utterly in love with him – Keith had put you under the impression that he had felt the exact same way.

Perhaps for some time, he had felt the same way. Nobody can pretend to be in love with another person for over four years and not feel something, and Keith had definitely treated you like somebody he loved. But you hadn't been enough for him, and soon, the two of you were walking along the river at night, and he had given you the harsh news that the spark you two once shared was just no longer present, and you were going to have to accept that.

Since then, these weddings that you were forced to go to had been torture.

Today was going to be no different. You knew that much from the moment you had woken up, looked at your schedule and seen that you had yet another large venue booked. You would need to dress up in all white, do your hair all fancy, practise your fake smile and your congratulations in the mirror before you left – all of which sounded most drab in comparison to simply staying in bed and rotting into the mattress.

However, you needed to pay bills. That was your only motivation as you dragged yourself from the cosy and familiar confines of your bed and sauntered over to your dressing table where you promptly got ready for the day. After taking a quick shower, you dabbed some make up on your face, put the ratchet white dress on and headed out the door for yet another gut wrenching day of work.

The venue in question was massive; an entire hotel had been booked to accommodate the hundreds of guests who would be in attendance – you, of course, included. The hotel itself was clearly five star, two door men standing on either side of the large, oak double doors, greeting people with nods and grins as they filed in. Pillars stood outside with white flowers dangling from them, and wedding music was already playing loud and clear from the crowded lobby.

You straightened your camera, inhaled deeply, and entered.

Immediately you were sucked into another world; this was a common feeling for you whenever you actually stepped foot inside of a wedding venue. Despite your hostility and ongoing heartbreak, it was impossible to attend a wedding as beautiful as this one and not feel something close to awe. It hit you like a ton of bricks this time, the white banners and the pretty flower petals cheering you up just that little bit.

“Ah, you must be Y/N!” a voice sounded from somewhere in the thick crowd.

You whirled around, very nearly knocking someone out cold with the camera in your hands. You quickly apologised, seconds before Romelle – the wedding planner – threw herself into your arms and forced you into a hug. The camera pressed into her lower stomach, making the hug most awkward, but Romelle was clearly in too good of a mood to care too much about that.

She pushed you away. You stumbled, catching yourself on a chair behind you.

“I'm so glad you could make it!” she exclaimed. “I saw some of your other works on the websites I was looking through, and I must say that you truly have a gift with the lens. The pictures you take are fascinating!”

You forced a smile on your face. “Thank you. That means a-”

“Come this way.” She snatched your hand from your side and started towards the back room. “The bride and groom are yet to arrive, but I don't think it's all that important for you to meet them just yet. We can wait until the ceremony is over and then we can do our introductions, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Until then, I would like you to stay near the edges. Keep yourself hidden. The pictures we want our meant to look like the people have no idea you're even there – natural, almost.”

“Natural,” you repeated.

“Mm. That's your speciality, isn't it?”

She turned to look at you over her shoulder, though she continued speaking before you could answer her question.

“You don't have a seat for the main ceremony. As I said, we want you to just remain near the corners, taking photos whenever you think necessary – you're the professional, so I'm trusting you to get the right shots all throughout the day. The bride and groom are most excited to get a lot of these pictures framed and hung up around their house, so keep that in mind whenever you're taking the pictures.”

“I-”

“Here we are!” Romelle squealed once before shoving you in front of her. Once again, you very nearly fell over your own two feet with the intensity of which she had shoved you, though you just managed to catch yourself before falling face first into the plush carpet of the room you were being ushered into.

It wasn't much. There were two brown sofas set up on either side of the room, a single TV placed between them that was currently playing a re-run of Friends. There was a table adorned with wine and little trays of cut-up vegetables that did very little to trigger your appetite.

“You can set up in here if you like,” Romelle said. “I'll come and get you when you're needed. Please, feel free to help yourself to the appetisers. We don't want you walking around hungry, do we?” She laughed, nodded to you and finally left the room in a bustle of dress skirts and over enthusiasm.

For a moment, you could do nothing but stare into thin air; had that truly just happened? Had you genuinely just been shoved into a room, all but forgotten about?

You hollowed out your cheeks, silently reminded yourself that this was for next months rent – you needed to keep your will power in check, or else you would end up homeless.

But at least you had wine to drown out your sorrows this time. Perhaps that would make this job a little more bearable.

Before you could think better of it, you uncorked the bottle of wine and poured a little bit into the cup provided. You slumped down on the sofa, turned your attention to the television as you sipped at the bubbling drink – you weren't even that big of a fan of wine, but you needed something to keep you going today. There was no way in hell you were going to be able to get through this entire day without a little boost.

You must have been sat for a half hour before the door finally opened.

You shot upright. You hadn't even finished your first glass of wine, struggling to fight through your distaste for the beverage, but you felt as if your senses were already beginning to slow. You turned to the door, expecting to see Romelle bustling in, but were surprised to see that it was not Romelle at all.

It was a man – a man who most definitely did not want to be there.

He didn't look up from the floor. It took him a moment to notice the room was occupied at all, his blue-grey eyes tracing over the bottle of wine before finally landing on you. It was then that he raised one of his brows and slowly closed the door, pointing wordlessly to the bottle.

Hesitantly, you held the bottle out to him. Again, without a single word shared between you, he took the bottle from your hands, slumped down on the sofa across from you and started drinking directly from it.

You could do nothing but watch him closely. He didn't look much older than you – maybe by a year or two, judging by the lines beside his eyes, but nothing too drastic. He wore a dark blue suit, the top buttons undone and laying askew against his collar bones. His bow tie had been undone and was also hanging limp around his neck, his dishevelled brown hair only adding to the look of carelessness that he was clearly trying to give off.

He kept his eyes on the television between you; you wanted to do the same, wanted to pretend like you were just as carefree as he was, but he had grabbed your attention most tightly within only a few minutes. He had walked in with absolutely nothing to say, didn't even care that the small room was already occupied. He was also very clearly a part of the ceremony, judging by the fancy suit he was wearing.

It took him a few moments to realise you were staring at him.

He looked up, raised one eyebrow. “Why have you brought that big ass camera to the wedding?”

You started, clutching your camera tight to your side. You quickly looked away, afraid that he had seen you staring at him so intensely.

“I'm not a guest,” you said quickly. “I'm the photographer.”

He grunted. “Oh right. I probably should have guessed that.”

“And what are you? A groomsman?”

He scoffed. “The best of the best, aren't I? Ryan decided to make me best man, so I had no choice but to dress up in this stupid suit and make a fool of myself.”

You opened your mouth to reply, but no response seemed good enough, so you stayed silent. The man hollowed out his cheeks, shook his head dumbly and took yet another swig from the wine bottle.

“I shouldn't be so grumpy,” he grumbled, more-so to himself than to you, it seemed. “He's happy. My best friend is happy, and that should be all that matters, right?”

You hummed in response.

“But I just hate these things. The fluffy vibe, the way everybody is trying so hard to get along even though it's obvious that Ryan's family hates Nadia's family – they're just trying to be civil for the sake of the event. The fakest shit I've ever seen. Makes me cringe.”

“It'll be over by tomorrow.”

The man scoffed. “That's where you're wrong – today is just the beginning, I think. I'll have to deal with babysitting their children next, won't I? Because that's the next step. Making a family, Ryan getting a normal job, completely forgetting about me because he has other important things to deal with.” He shrugged loosely. “To hell with them all, I say. Whenever they're old and debating getting a divorce, I'll still be free as a damn bird, doing whatever the hell I want with no strings attached.”

You winced. “You really don't want to be here, do you?”

The man froze, bottle halfway to his lips. His features slowly softened, as if realisation was finally dawning on him. “God, what kind of wine is this? It's clearly gone straight to my head.”

“You know what they say; a drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts.” The man's eyes flicked up, glancing at you through the top of his eyelids. “I'm James.”

“Y/N.”

James slowly leaned back in his chair, finally making the wise decision to set the wine bottle down. He instead reached into the deep pockets of his dress trousers and tugged out a tiny, travel-sized water bottle.

“Y/N,” he repeated, as if testing your name out. “You won't tell anyone about my little outburst there, will you?”

You shook your head immediately. “Of course not. I'm just here on business.”

“So you don't know anyone?”

“Not a single person. I didn't even know the bride and grooms names until just now.”

James hummed as he continued to inspect you, as if expecting you to do something totally bizarre; you simply sat there, hands knotted in your lap, mind racing at one hundred miles per hour. Why was he looking at you like that? Why was he still in here, keeping up a conversation with a person he didn't even know?

“Well, I'll keep you company,” he said finally.

Your eyes snapped up. “What? No. You don't have to-”

He raised a silencing hand. “I've got nothing better to do. Once my duties as best man are finished, I'm gonna be left in the dirt for the rest of the day. I might as well spend my time getting drunk with a pretty girl, shouldn't I?” He smirked, took a sip of his water before sighing and leaning back in his seat.

You eyed him curiously. He had the personality of a teenager, but there was something oddly compelling about it. The way he smirked, tilted his head back, held himself with so much confidence despite the clear self-consciousness that he had been spewing to you for the past half hour; he was afraid his friends were going to leave him. He was afraid he was going to be alone, and he masked that in the best way he could think of – by pretending it didn't bother him in the slightest.

You didn't know him, had only been speaking to him for a half hour, and yet you felt as if you could see right through him. Perhaps it was because you felt the exact same way. Being left behind by people you thought would be in your life forever was a terrifying thing to think about, and you were able to spot whenever somebody else felt the same way.

The idea of your friends moving on, getting their life on track before you have even figured out what you want to do for a living was one that had you panicking.

You took another sip of your wine, leaned back and tried to shove the thoughts from your head. At least now you had someone you could talk to throughout the day.

---

The ceremony was beautiful. As had been expected by all of the decorations hung up around the venue.

You stayed true to the orders that had been given to you and pressed yourself firmly against the walls, making little movement and little noise – the only time people really noticed your presence was when the camera would click, signalling you had taken yet another photograph, and even then they didn't seem bothered by you being there.

The bride, Nadia, looked gorgeous walking down the aisle. Her black hair was done up to perfection, though you cringed to think of just how long it took to get it to stand up on its own like that. She was crying even before she had reached the dais, and Ryan – the groom – had been forced to wrap his arms around her and tug her into an embrace before the ceremony had begun.

You had glanced over at James, just barely catching the moment he rolled his eyes at the sight.

James himself looked handsome standing upon the dais, despite the lazy and carefree demeanour he was still trying to put on. His bow tie had been done back up, his suit straightened out and his hair as neat as he could make it. Strands still stuck out around his head, and it still flopped against his forehead in a way that was too casual for the setting, but he was pulling it off and definitely grabbing your attention.

The vows were shared, pictures were taken, and then Ryan and Nadia were exiting the venue together, leaving the guests to chitter about what they had just seen. You huddled yourself further into the corner, tapping through the pictures you had taken, hoping and praying that some of them were decent. You were certain Romelle would be-

“Let me see.”

Your camera was snatched from your hand. You looked up quickly. James stood before you, a lollipop now placed in his mouth as he thumbed through your gallery.

“Hey!” you exclaimed, snatching the camera back. “Those aren't for you.”

“I hope you got my good side,” he said.

“You weren't my main focus. It isn't your wedding.”

James scoffed. “Damn right it isn't.” He sucked harshly on the lollipop before taking it out of his mouth. “Although I think that's a bit cruel. I'm playing a big part today.”

“I'm sure you are. But it's quite difficult to get a decent picture of somebody who was scowling the entire time.” You raised a brow. “I thought you wanted to be happy for your friend?”

James frowned. “I am happy for him!”

“Then why did you look like a slapped bulldog when you were standing up there?”

James scoffed, furrowing his brows at your choice of wording. You didn't care. You found yourself growing more and more curious as to the true reason behind James's hostility, despite only knowing the man for a few hours.

“I didn't think I looked too bad,” he grumbled, tugging on his lapels. “In fact, I think I look fairly decent in a suit.”

“You know that's not what I meant.”

James shrugged. “Then I don't know what you mean, and I don't care.” Before you could react or push the subject any further, James grabbed your hand and started towards the exit. “Come on. Drink reception is happening soon and I desperately need something to keep me standing upright.”

“And you think alcohol is going to do that for you?” you asked through a giggle, stumbling behind him.

James smirked, turned and winked at you over his shoulder. “It'll keep me awake at least.”

---

“So tell me about this little job you've got going on here.”

You turned, glass of wine in your hand and camera dangling idly from your neck. James was stood behind you, one hand tucked messily into the pocket of his trousers whilst the other held a glass bottle containing some kind of strong smelling beer.

“I'm a photographer,” you replied simply.

James scoffed. “I caught on to that part. But what do you actually do? Do you enjoy it? Are people nice to you? Does it pay well?”

“So many questions for somebody who said he didn't care.”

He waved a dismissive hand. “Just talk. I wanna get to know you.”

His comment was innocent, and yet your cheeks started to heat up nonetheless. You looked away, curled your lips around your glass and took an extra long sip of your wine before replying.

“I take pictures of people at weddings,” you said. “Nothing special. It's boring for the most part, but I get to see all these beautiful ceremonies and everybody is so happy, so I guess that's a bonus. People tend to ignore me until they want professional pictures taken, and then all of a sudden I'm the best person in the room. As for payment – well – it's a bit rude to ask somebody about their income, isn't it?”

James's eyes flared, a smile growing on his face. “Sounds like you have the time of your life. And you don't bring anyone to these things? Not even a plus-one?”

You shrugged. “I don't need a plus-one. I'm used to standing around on my own.”

“You know, maybe one day you should get in on that bouquet throwing thing the bride does – imagine how wild it would be if you caught it.”

You scoffed. “It would be wild considering I'm single.”

James frowned. There was a shift in the air, a tension that had not been there before now placed between you. You winced at it, slowly turned back to look towards the main floor where people were mingling absent-mindedly – you knew exactly what James had been talking about when he mentioned the tension between the bride and grooms families. Any other drink reception you had been to had consisted of loud chatter, laughter, happiness on both parts. Now, the chatter was nothing louder than a low murmur, the music dominating the majority of the space.

James stepped up beside you. You could feel his presence, the way he towered over you so drastically, the way his shoulder gently brushed against yours as he took a swig of his beer, watching the same scene as you.

“Is it not torture having to stand around a wedding whenever you're single?” he asked suddenly.

You inhaled sharply, tensing. What a strange question to ask.

You glanced up at him, inspecting his face for any sign that he was joking – but there was none. His lips were pulled into a thin line, his blue-grey eyes continuing their rounds of the dance floor, his hand still lazily shoved into his pockets in a way that told you he did not give a single shit about what he was saying.

“No,” you said slowly. “I don't – I don't tend to think about it too much, actually.”

He paused and then nodded. “I think I'd be driven insane.”

You raised a brow. “You really don't like being single, do you?”

That caught his attention. His eyes popped open wide, the bottle dropping from his lips as he turned to look at you in shock. “What's that supposed to mean?”

“I mean, I'm just saying – you've complained an awful lot about how lonely you are for the past four hours. It just seems to me like-”

“Like nothing,” he spat, and this time he sounded genuinely angry. “I love being single. In fact, I think marriage is the stupidest thing on the planet. Why would you tie yourself down like that, all legal and shit? It's too much effort for something that might not even work out.”

“I think you're looking at it the wrong way.”

“I think other people are looking at it the wrong way, acting like they're life isn't complete unless they can get someone to put a rock on their damn hand.” He scoffed. “Other people won't bring you happiness – not the kind that counts, anyway. It's about time this generation stopped pretending that they will.”

You were stunned. Shamelessly, you stared at up the side of James's face, examining him, somehow trying to crack open who this man truly was – but again, his features were stone cold. His brows were furrowed, the bottle being brought back to his lips in a way that startled you just that little bit – he would have to make the best man speech today. It was only 3.30pm and he was already on his third beer of the day.

You looked away, pursing your lips. You had no right to chastise him for his beliefs, for his inner demons. You were going to be here for another few hours, take the professional pictures that had been requested before you were due to head home to your freezing cold apartment to wallow in self pity before you would wake up tomorrow and repeat the process. You had no reason to babysit this stranger standing beside you – even if his actions and his words were beginning to worry you a little bit.

Drink reception lasted only an hour and a half before you were all being led back into the hotel for wedding breakfast. By this time, the winter had already dominated the skies, meaning it was beginning to get dark. Coloured lanterns floated up into the sky with flames tinkling on the inside of them – the sight was beautiful.

“Get a picture of that,” James said, nudging your elbow.

You did so. Not because he had told you to, but because the sight was one made to capture. It was as if the lanterns had been set up for the soul purpose of you snapping a picture of them.

Once again, you stayed close to the walls as the wedding breakfast went on. You ate away at the buffet table with permission from the bride herself, and found yourself genuinely enjoying your time there. With the bride and groom now present in the room, spirits were definitely higher and the families of the two were speaking a little bit more freely – you would be an idiot to claim there was no sense of tension mixing in with the friendly banter, but perhaps the alcohol had loosened their tongues a little bit.

You glanced over at James far more than you would have liked to. He was sat beside Ryan, chatting animatedly with his best friend, definitely in higher spirits from how he had been outside. He laughed and joked, slapping his best friend on the shoulder before the two of them would throw their heads back and howl in laughter; you found yourself smiling, though you weren't entirely sure why.

You did your job in complete silence, parading around the tables and asking people if they would mind having their pictures taken. Elderly women held up wine glasses and smiled awkwardly into the lens, whilst the younger kids jumped from their seats and posed in the middle of the floor, forcing a chorus of laughter to emerge from the other guests. You grinned, politely thanked them all before moving on.

It wasn't long until you had reached the big table – the table where the bride and groom were sitting.

The table where James was sitting.

You waltzed up to it with as much confidence as you could muster. Even before you had reached the table, James's eyes were firm on you, watching your every movement as if you were his prey and he was waiting for the right moment to pounce. You hoped that you didn't stumble under his gaze, that you could somehow find the strength to ignore him as you spoke to the bride and groom.

The last thing you wanted was for James to know that his gaze alone was enough to make you flustered.

“Y/N! I thought you'd forgotten about us,” Ryan joked, leaning over the table to shake your hand.

You smiled warmly. “Of course not. I was just saving the best for last. Now, would you like a picture taken as a keepsake for later on?”

Ryan nodded, wrapping an arm around his new wifes shoulders. You couldn't help but glance over at James, watching his tanned face flush. He took yet another rough sip of his drink, turning away to look at the crowd.

You pursed your lips and started snapping pictures of the posing bride and groom, encouraging them in that way that only a true photographer knew how to do; little comments, telling them to shift their pose, telling them how good of a job they were doing and how good they both looked. It took every fibre of your being to ignore the scoffs emerging from James every few seconds – scoffs that Ryan nor Nadia seemed to take note of in their moment of after-wedding bliss.

Finally, the last picture was upon them. Of course, it was only natural for Ryan to turn and press his lips to Nadia's. You weren't shocked by the action. You had been in this business for a while now, and this was a common pose for the bride and groom to take. You simply smiled, snapped the picture and-

James scoffed once again. Your temper bubbled over.

“How about we get some pictures of you with the best man?” you asked.

James's eyes widened, snapping to you in panic. You grinned at him, turned back to Ryan with a raised brow.

Ryan was all for it, of course. He cheered, wrapped his arm around James's shoulders and smiled brightly for the camera; you encouraged him even more now, saying things like, “Come on, James! Chin up! You don't want to be looking like a child in the photo albums, do you?”

James was trying so hard to seem enthusiastic. He even went as far as to wrap his arms around his friend, placing an extremely strained grin on his face in the process; it made you laugh, though you covered it up as best as you could with your own snide comments thrown into the mix.

Finally, you decided to let the man live. You tugged the camera away from your face, thanked the bride and groom with courtesy before you winked at James, turned on your heel and headed back into your dark little corner to inspect the pictures you had taken.

All of them had turned out perfectly. You couldn't help but giggle to yourself when you came upon the ones with James, looking at how awkward he seemed with his best friends arm wrapped tight around his neck, tugging him into his side, making it so clear that he didn't want to be there in the slightest.

That's what he got for being so negative all the time.

Clink clink clink.

You looked up, letting the camera drop back against your stomach. Ryan and Nadia were both standing up now, Ryan with a glass and spoon in his hands that he had clearly just used to gather the attention of his guests.

“Everyone, thank you all so much for coming today,” he started. “It really has been an incredible day, and I'm sure you all have a lot to say. So, we're gonna dive right into the speeches!”

The crowd cheered, even though they didn't have to. Nadia's father was the first one to make a speech. Nadia started crying, tugged her dad into a hug and thanked him kindly; it was a pure sight, and you were unable to stop yourself from taking a few memorable pictures of their loving embrace.

“And now, the best man speech,” said Nadia through tears.

James stiffened. Ryan span in his chair, giving his best friend a quick nudge in the elbow with a large smile on his face – you flushed despite yourself, watching the anxiety suddenly appear on James's face. He was bright red, lips slightly swollen from the amount of times he had placed a cold bottle against them.

Oh god. He was in no fit state to be making public speeches right now.

You forced yourself to keep your eyes on him when he finally stood up and started fumbling around in his pocket. He cursed loudly, making a few of the parents in the crowd scowl and quickly cover their childrens ears. Finally, James hit the jackpot and tugged the ripped piece of paper out of his trousers, unfolding it with hesitant fingers.

“Thank you, everyone,” he started, voice hoarse from alcohol. Ryan was already starting to catch on to what was happening, a scowl forming on his face. “Uh – my name is James Griffin, and I'm Ryan's best friend. Ryan. The – uh – the groom. The lucky man himself.” He winced, slapped a hand against Ryan's shoulders before continuing. “Ryan and I met at the Garrison a few years back. I don't really remember how long ago it was, but I don't think that matters, because the things we've been through together would count as an eternity anyway.”

You smiled. That was nice.

“Like that one time I nearly cut my left leg off in a flight demo and Ryan had to be there to stop the bleeding.”

A child in the audience cried out. Ryan's eyes widened. Nadia's jaw fell, her hand snapping out to wrap around her husbands lower arm.

James didn't take notice of these startled reactions, however, as he continued on his speech.

“Ryan and Nadia have been together for an awfully long time, too. I didn't like Nadia when I first met her, because I thought she was some kind of spy or something.” He snickered. “Then I realised that she has the flexibility of an iron pole, so that wasn't possible.”

“Okay-” Ryan began, reaching up to grab James's arms, but the man was on a roll and he clearly had no intentions of stopping.

“When Ryan proposed, I told him I was happy for him, even though I knew it would be the worst mistake of his life. See, the thing about being somebody's best friend is that you have to support them through everything, don't you? Even if you're fairly certain they're gonna destroy their life, you have to suck it up and let them make those kind of mistakes on their own, figure out where they went wrong so they can avoid that same mistake for next time.” James turned to face Ryan fully then, grinning from ear to ear. “Just remember that I'll be right here, ready to welcome you back whenever this marriage goes to shit and you need a drinking buddy. I love you man.”

That was the final straw. You looked at Ryan for the space of two seconds before you had gathered his entire demeanour – he was not happy, and if James did not get out of his face at that very moment, all hell would break loose.

You weren't sure what came over you, where this surge of protectiveness and confidence suddenly came from, but you were marching your way up to the big table before you could comprehend your own actions.

James span around when he noticed you walking towards him. “Y/N! My other single friend!”

“Be quiet,” you hissed, snatching his hand into your own and dragging him away from his seat. You quickly turned to Ryan and Nadia, mouthed sorry before you quickened your pace and trailed James into the lobby of the hotel.

He was drunk. So, so drunk. You could smell it on his suit, could feel the sweat coming from his palms, see the sweat coming from his forehead.

“Why did you let yourself get in such a state?” you grumbled, fishing a napkin out of your pocket and using it to dab at the sweat on James's forehead.

He closed his eyes and hummed against the sensation, one of his hands slowly coming up to curl around your wrist. His touch reminded you of feathers with how light it was, fingertips pattering against your skin. He didn't want to control your movements; he just wanted to feel your flesh beneath his fingers.

“James,” you whispered, shaking your head. “Do you have any idea what you've just done?”

“I think I messed up,” he whispered back, eyes still closed and that stupid smile still tugging on his lips. “Ryan's never going to talk to me again.”

You sighed. “I wouldn't bet on it.”

“What a plot twist!” he suddenly burst, eyes snapping open and grip tightening on your wrist. He looked right at you as he said, “It turns out that it wasn't marriage that destroyed mine and Ryan's friendship. It was me!” He laughed, shaking his head. “Oh, that's insane. Was not expecting that.”

Even though he was yelling, smiling, jumping from side-to-side like an excited toddler, you could recognise that disguised pain in anybodies voice. He was not happy. He was not excited. He knew full well the true extent of what he had done, of what he had just lost.

You weakly smiled back at him, wrapped an arm around his waist and tugged him into you.

---

You were too worried to leave him on his own.

He had passed out only a few minutes after you had managed to drag him into the back room of the wedding reception. As soon as his head hit the pillow, he was drifting off to sleep with that smile still lazily etched onto his features, one hand knotted in his hair whilst the other hung loosely off the edge of the sofa cushions.

You were meant to leave. You knew full well that you should have gotten back to your job, should have been back out there capturing moments, but you had instead sat yourself down across from him and watched him like a hawk, as if afraid he would do something stupid in his sleep.

At this point, you wouldn't put it past him.

You heard the wedding guests filing out of the dinner hall. They were cheering; the bride and groom were leaving, and clearly James's words had had little effect on the mood of the day. Nonetheless, you stayed with him, bunched up on the sofa with your knees pressed to your chest and camera laying idly by your side.

You weren't sure when you fell asleep. You were shaken awake. Eyes snapping open, you bolted upright and grabbed for the first thing you could find – which just so happened to be the lapels of James's blazer.

You tugged, sending James toppling forward. He just managed to stabilise himself with one hand on the sofa cushions behind you, his face now inches from yours. You winced, pushed him away as the stench of alcohol attacked your senses.

“You're awake. Finally,” you said.

“What are you still doing in here?” He sounded exasperated, running a hand through his brown hair.

You raised a brow. “You didn't just expect me to pack up and leave, did you? I thought you were gonna choke on your own tongue.”

“That didn't stop you from falling asleep though, did it?” He raised a brow at you in that judgemental way you had seen all too often tonight. You rolled your eyes, threw a pillow at him which he caught with swiftness before hugging it close to his chest. “I hope to god you didn't stay with me the entire time. Romelle won't give you your wages if you only did half the job.”

Your stomach fell. You had made the conscious decision to stay with James, despite knowing the consequences. You had no right to be shocked now.

You shrugged lazily, trying to pretend like you didn't care, like you weren't struggling for money at the moment. “It's fine.”

James's eyes widened. “What do you mean it's fine? You spend an entire day at some strangers wedding and you don't even get what you came here for.”

“I got a bit more than what I came here for.” You tilted your head. “You've been quite the experience, James Griffin.”

He stared at you, a blush rising on his face. “How do you do that?”

“Do what?”

“That!” he exclaimed, flopping back against the sofa. “I'm so used to people just accepting what I say as gospel or something, because I'm the leader of the MFE's. But you – you don't let anything past, do you?”

You shrugged. “I didn't know you were the leader of the MFE's, so-”

“You also know how to make the leader of the MFE's extremely flustered.” He folded his arms over his chest, glared at you. “I hate it. Stop it.”

Despite everything that had happened, the stupidity and selfishness James had shown, you couldn't stop yourself from laughing at his oh-so-innocent comments, the small pout forming on his face.

“You look like a three year old when you pout like that,” you said.

James rolled his eyes. “There you go again.”

“I can't help that you're so easy to pick on.”

James grumbled as he stood up, dragging his coat along with him. You watched his every movement with a stupid grin on your face, one that seemed so natural despite what had happened today.

James started towards the door, still grumbling under his breath before he suddenly stopped and turned to look at you over his shoulder. You froze under his gaze, tilting your head to the side, awaiting what he had to say.

“You know, we both had a lot to drink tonight,” he started. “The taxi fare will be cheaper if you stay over at mine tonight and we share one.”

Your eyes widened, heart suddenly thundering at a million miles per hour. James must have noticed the sudden change in your demeanour, as that shit-eating grin of his split his face once again.

You swallowed thickly, nodded before you could think better of it. The thought of going back to your cold apartment had been bothering you all day, anyway – now that you had a chance to be anywhere else, you were going to take it as soon as possible.

Yes. That was the reason why you were nodding, scrambling to gather up your belongings. It wasn't just because it was James asking you to go with him.

No. It wasn't that at all.

----

“You didn't tell me the bride and grooms names,” James hissed, appearing beside you.

You jumped, very nearly dropping your camera in the process. You whirled around to glare at your plus-one, but his face was neutral as he sipped casually on a bottle of water, looking out at the crowd forming in the castle gardens.

“Because I didn't think you'd want to go up and talk to them,” you replied. “Where's your tie gone?”

“I took it off.”

“Why?”

“Because I don't know these people. I'm only here so I can see you twirl around in that pretty dress of yours.” He smirked, leaned forward as if expecting a kiss, but you were a professional. Even though every bone in your body wanted to meet him half way and completely ravish him in that suit, you pulled away and placed your fingertips against his awaiting lips.

He frowned, eyebrows furrowing.

“I'm working,” you said. “You know we can't be doing that kind of thing here.”

“If anything, I think this is the best place for it,” he shot back, trailing behind you when you started walking through the crowd with your camera raised. “Remember when we first met and I used to hate these things?”

“You still do hate these things.”

“Not so much now,” he protested. “I'm not single any more. They aren't so depressing.”

You scoffed. “Are we only together so you can feel better about yourself during weddings?”

His hand wound around your waist, tugging you into his side. “Although that's a definite bonus, I'm also head over heels in love with you.” He pulled away then. “Which I honestly don't understand, considering all we did was contradict each other that first day we met.”

“Actually, I contradicted you,” you corrected. “You were too deep in your feelings, and too drunk, to come up with good arguments.”

“Ah. At least you remember the state I was in that day.”

“I remember it well.”

James scowled, playfully pinching your elbow. You giggled, could barely help yourself when you stood up on your tippy toes and placed an innocent kiss to his cheek. Despite James trying his hardest to come across as the uncaring, macho man that the Garrison knew him as, you still managed to pry a blush from his cheeks at the simplest of touches. You grinned from ear to ear, a slight bounce in your step as you pulled away from him and started back through the crowd. James, as per usual, continued his unintelligible grumbling, following close behind you.

It still amazed you how much he had changed in the few months it had been since you met. He still spoke about marriage as if it was some kind of curse, continually asking you if you would ever just elope with him rather than go through the works of some massive ceremony where the entire family would be invited and things would have to go perfectly – you had told him on multiple occasions that you didn't care how the ceremony went, as long as it was James you were spending the rest of your life with at the end of it all.

It was cheesy, language you never would have used before. Even with Keith, you two had never spoken so openly about the idea of marriage, because even though you had been certain you were in love, talking about something so permanent just added a tiny bit of pressure.

But with James, it was natural. It was something you both spoke about casually, as if the idea of marriage wasn't something that had once disgusted your boyfriend.

You were happy to see his views changing to something more positive, but what you had said was true – you didn't need to marry him, didn't need a ring on your finger or your name signed on some legal documents. As long as you were with James, you didn't care whether you were just called girlfriend or wife.

----

You sighed, stretching your arms out above your head. James grunted, shifting beneath you as your hands very nearly clipped him on the nose.

You grumbled, rolling over and placing your head on his chest. “Sorry.”

“You tired?” he asked through a chuckle, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and nuzzling his nose in your hair.

You couldn't do much more than nod against his chest.

He chuckled again. “You said you'd watch Stranger Things with me.”

“I will. I'm still awake.”

“Your eyes are closed.”

“I can listen to it.”

“Y/N.” He sighed, shifting so he could press his lips to your temple. “Go to sleep. We can watch it another day.”

You groaned. “You said that yesterday! We need to watch it tonight.”

“Why do we?”

“Because you want to watch it, and I said I would watch it with you.” You forced your eyes open, perching your chin against his chest so you could look up at him. “As your girlfriend, it's my job to make sure you don't watch any Netflix series without me. That's the rule.”

James smiled. It was a perfect smile, one you would never get tired of, one that sent butterflies parading through your stomach that you quickly stifled by nuzzling your head back into his chest and pointing towards the TV.

“Turn it on then. Let's get watching.”

James sighed, reaching for the remote. “I love you so much, you know.”

“I love you, too.”

“Even though you're a complete pain in my ass the majority of the time,” he added. “You still make me the happiest bloke on the planet.”

You smiled. “James, stop. You're gonna make me cry.”

“Maybe that'll wake you up a little bit,” he teased, pinching your sides. You squealed, slid away from him before you started missing his warmth and nuzzled back into his side. “You do know that you changed my life, though, don't you?”

You froze. “James...”

He sighed dreamily, still casually surfing through the shows on the Netflix homepage. He passed Stranger Things twice without noticing.

“When I first met you, I was a complete asshole, and yet you still took care of me. You still said yes whenever I asked you out on that date. You still said yes whenever I asked you to move in with me. You saw that I was just angry because of my own selfish reasons, and you gave me a chance to prove myself to you. The fact that I managed to find someone so understanding and so kind still blows my mind to this day.”

“I love you, James. You don't need to be shocked that I'm still around.”

He nodded, hugging you a little bit tighter. “But I want – I want you to be around for the rest of my life, you know? I want you to know that I'm in this forever, even if I can come off as a little heartless sometimes, or like I don't care. I want to prove to you that I'm serious about this.”

You froze. “James, what are you-”

He sat up. You scrambled at the movement, pulling back in the blankets, but his hands shot up and wrapped around your arms. It was only then did you see the look on his face, that small, tired smile exaggerated by his bloodshot eyes and messy hair – he looked so James right now, like the James only you were ever allowed to see because you were the only person in the world he trusted this much.

You watched him with wide eyes – eyes that were already beginning to fill with tears – as he reached beneath the sofa and tugged out a black, velvet box. Your heart skipped a beat. Air had long since been knocked from your lungs, leaving you with your jaw hanging open and tears streaming down your face.

He looked up at you nervously, awkwardly chuckling at the sight of your startled face. “I guess you can already tell what I'm gonna ask, huh?”

“Are you sure?” you whispered.

“More sure than I've ever been about anything in my entire life.”

“Please say it. I want to hear you say it.”

James smiled, slowly leaned forward and pressed his forehead against your own. “Y/N L/N, love of my life – will you do me the absolute honour of becoming my wife?”

To you, the answer was obvious. There was no other reply you could give him other than the one that was balancing on the end of your tongue at this very moment.

You smiled, leapt forward and nuzzled your head into his neck, sobbing against his skin as the world slowly knitted itself back together around you – the world that had once been so unsure and so scary, so big and vast, now seemed to shrink a little bit, now seemed to grow a little bit more understandable, because you knew now that you wouldn't have to face any of it alone.

You would have the love of your life right beside you the entire time, and you couldn't think of anything you would have wanted more.

“Yes, James. Of course I'll marry you.”

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turn-your-gaze-on-this-dumptruck · 6 years ago

Text

His Past, His Present, His Future: Chapter 6 - Wine

Sorry for the pause between uploads. I’ve been moving, and between that and college I have had zero spare time.

After a difficult conversation, Germany and Italy make dinner. This chapter is basically just domestic fluff.

Ao3

Fanfiction.net

**********************

The two worked in the kitchen, Italy insisting on making home-made… soup? Broth? As Germany boiled the noodles. He was content to just watch Italy chop and stir and simmer from his seat on a bar stool opposite of him. Other than boiling pasta, there was nothing for him to do. They talked about things that didn’t matter, reminiscing on Halloween parties and Christmas celebrations. Italy introduced the idea that he should host a holiday sometime. Perhaps Easter.

Germany nodded. “It’s nice here in the spring.”

Italy looked up from his work, brushing hair out of his face and behind his ear. “Yes. The flowers in my garden just start to bloom, and it smells so nice! It’s the kind of weather that makes you want to go on a walk and enjoy life, you know?” Though his words were deceptively bright, Germany had noted the fact that Italy had been averting his gaze the entire evening.

Germany smiled slightly, hoping to reassure him. “It would be good to have everyone here.”

Italy peered through his lashes at Germany. “Even America?”

“Hmm, maybe not him.” Germany joked, standing to stir the pasta.

“Oh, I know you have a soft spot for him.” Italy protested, dumping the cutting board into the sink. “Care to wash this for me?”

Germany stepped over and started the water, waiting for it to heat up. The kitchen was starting to smell of spices. “I don’t have a soft spot for him.”

Italy smiled, lightly pushing into Germany’s ribs with his elbow as he walked past him. “Sure.” Germany returned the smile. It seemed that now that the touch barrier has been broken, things were finally less tense.

The conversation faded as Germany enjoyed the warm kitchen, the tile underneath his socked feet, and Italy’s quiet humming. It was serene and peaceful. He gazed out the window facing Italy’s back garden, noting that Italy had strung up strands of round lights through the branches of the trees, barely visible against the searing light of the sunset against the clouds.

“I think Japan is in love with him.”

Germany blinked, shocked by Italy’s idea. “Really?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. He began scrubbing at the cutting board.

“Mm-hmm!”

Germany towel-dried it and strode over to Italy. “I don’t believe you. Where does this go?” He lifted the cutting board up slightly.

Italy pointed to a narrow cupboard as he stirred the pasta sauce. “There. Have you seen how they interact?”

“Yes.” Germany raised a single eyebrow as he put up the cupboard. “They talk as friends.” He opened the fridge and peered into the cheese drawer. “You have no parmesan.”

Italy set his spoon on a spoon rest and walked over. “How did I run out of parmesan?”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if you ate it all.”

Germany looked over as Italy plucked a note from the door.

Italy read the note in Italian. “I got the last of the Parmesan. The Potato Bastard will take you to a farmer's market and you'll have to get more. Romano.”

“Romano took it?” Germany asked, surprised. “He must have stole it while I was back in your office.”

Italy shook his head with a fond smile, too distracted to question why Germany was back there in the first place. “He’s sneaky when he wants to be. He wants you to take me to a farmer’s market to get more.”

Germany hummed. “I’m sure we can find one over the next couple days.”

“That would be fun!” Italy agreed, stuffing the note in his pocket.

“So you were saying?” Germany asked, shutting the fridge door. “About Japan and America?”

“Oh, so you’re interested?” Italy asked with a grin, untying his apron and hanging it on a magnetized hook on the fridge.

Germany felt his cheeks heat up. “I just want to know how Japan is doing. It’s what friends do.”

Italy quirked an eyebrow. “Mm-hmm... have you ever noticed that when America walks in, Japan is one of the first to notice? He always seems to have time to watch a scary movie with him, no matter what he has going on.”

“That’s a friend thing.” Germany protested. “I do the same for you.” Despite the neutral tone of his voice, he felt shaky. Sure, he did the same thing, but what he felt for Italy was beyond friendship.

“Well yes,” Italy allowed. “But is Japan really the type? You’re really affectionate. He’s not.”

“I’m not affectionate!” Germany protested loudly.

Italy turned off the burner to the pasta and carried it over to the strainer. Germany hadn’t even realized he’d forgotten about it. “Sure you are! Everyone’s affectionate in their own way. Like when you remind me to grab an umbrella when it rains, or when you taught me how to throw a hand grenade, or how sometimes when I fall asleep on the couch you carry me to bed!”

Germany grunted. “All that is just human decency.” He determinedly ignored the other man as he pulled two bowls from the cupboard.

“You are affectionate in your actions. Not in words.” Italy continued, carrying the strainer back to the stove and dumping the pasta into the liquid in the pot. He stirred the contents and sniffed, sighing. “So is Japan. But he is less open about it. He is antisocial and often doesn’t enjoy going to other people’s houses, but he goes to America’s more frequently than anyone’s. More frequent than yours and ours, even!”

Germany considered this, grabbing two spoons. “Suppose you were somehow right. What about America?”

“What does he always say? His catchphrase, maybe?”

“... ‘I’m hungry’?”

Italy laughed. “Other than that.”

“Well, he always refers to himself as a hero.” Germany answered, carrying the dishes to the table. “What do you want to drink?”

Italy tipped the pot over, pouring the soup into a serving bowl. “Wine, please.”

“What kind?” Germany grabbed two wine glasses.

“Hmm... how about the Masseto Toscana? It should go well with the soup.”

Germany crouched by the wine rack, his eyebrows furrowed. He started pulling the bottles out one by one, examining the labels. “Why is him calling himself a hero relevant?”

Italy carried the bowl over to the table. “Because he cares a lot about his self image, right?”

Germany growled to himself as he pulled the third bottle of wine off the rack. “So?”

“Why would he call Japan over to watch scary movies constantly if it made him look like a coward?”

Germany prayed for the sweet release of death as he pulled the sixth bottle of wine halfway off the rack before noticing that the label was wrong.

Italy crouched next to him and considered the wine rack for a moment before removing a bottle from the bottom row. “Perhaps because America wants an excuse for Japan to come over.”

Straightening along with Italy, he grunted an affirmation.

“You think I’m right?” Italy asked, delightedly beaming as he noticed Germany had nothing to say.

“Nein.” Germany answered, making his way to the table. “I just can’t believe this conversation is actually starting to make logical sense.” He took a seat.

Italy shook his head, also sitting. “You just wait, Germany. Watch them spend time together and you’ll have to believe me!”

Germany grunted, ladleing soup into his bowl. “Not likely. What is this you’ve made?”

Italy let the conversation slide. “Pasta e Fagioli!” He proclaimed, popping the cork of the wine and pouring himself half a glass. He offered his hand for Germany’s glass.

Germany passed it. He always preferred a cold beer to anything else, but it wasn’t like he hated wine. “Sounds good.” He accepted his glass and took a bite of the soup, the warmth seeping through his entire being and soothing all the emotional ache of the day.

“It’s good?” Italy asked.

Germany realized his eyes had closed as he opened them. “It’s wunderbare.”

“Great!” Italy’s entire being seemed to brighten at his words.

“I was thinking about what we could do tomorrow. It has been so long since I’ve taken time to tour your country. I was thinking we could walk around Rome.”

Italy laughed, taking a sip of wine. “If you want to see what has changed here, Rome isn’t the best place to do it, Germany, everything is so old!”

Germany hummed. “Perhaps. I just remember we had a good time there.”

“Aww, Germany, that’s so sweet!”

“Germany attempted to hide his embarassment by tilting his wine glass upward and taking a sip.

“How is it?” Italy asked.

Germany tried to think of something intelligent to say. He knew that Italy was something of a wine efficianado. “It... tastes like wine. Good wine. It tastes good.”

Italy smiled like he was trying to hold in laughter. “I hope so, I have been saving it for a special occasion!”

“What special occasion?” Germany hoped Italy didn’t intend to mention the discoveries of today. That was the last thing he wanted to think about.

Italy raised his wine glass in a toast. “Your first vacation since 1990!”

Germany raised his glass, smiling. The two clinked their glasses.

“This wine was bottled that same year, you know.” Italy quipped. “Very convenient! Almost like it was meant to be!”

“We took that vacation in Turkey, yes?” Germany asked, taking another sip of wine. It was starting to grow on him.

Italy nodded. “Yes! Your latest vacation and it is with me almost three decades later... if that isn’t a reason to open up a 2,000 euro bottle of wine, I don’t know what is!”

Germany choked on his drink. He coughed and hacked, bending forward on the table as the worst of the coughs passed.

“Are you okay?” Italy asked.

“What the hell?!” He cursed in German.

“Gesundheit.” Italy offered.

Germany stared at the glass sitting on the table, wondering how much money he had drank in the two sips he had. “This wine was 2,000 euros?!”

Italy shrugged. “Well it was actually around 2,300, but... I’m not really particular about that sort of thing.”

“Jesus Christ.” Germany gasped.

“Well if you’re religious, yes!”

Germany squinted confusedly at the man sitting opposite of him.

“Get it? Wine? Blood of Christ?” Italy tried, stirring his soup. “It’s a Catholic joke.”

Germany lay his forehead in his palm. “My God, Italy.”

“Actually, he’s my God unless you’re Cath-”

“Italy!”

Germany lay in bed a few hours later, his hair still slightly damp from his shower. He allowed it to hang over his forehead and brush his eyebrows as he stared at the wall. Italy’s guest room had always been beautiful, what with the four poster bed and the glass double doors that lead to a balcony. The moon was half full tonight, allowing a soft blue light to spill into the room. What exactly had happened today? Well, he knew what happened. But it was just so much to process. How do you process learning that the past you thought you had wasn’t even half of your life? That you had an entire past that you didn’t even remember? That you died and somehow miraculously came back to life? It was all so much. There was really nothing he could do for that except give himself time to acclimate himself to this feeling. To this desire to learn about himself.

He realized that he was so busy worrying about all that that he had barely taken the time to consider what this meant for Italy. For him. For the both of them, maybe. They used to be... together? Maybe? Did that even count? Here Germany thought he had never even had his first kiss when he had it with Italy of all people. And Italy... he’d loved him too, once. That was the worst part. That in the past he had what was perhaps his greatest desire and he couldn’t even remember it. And beside that was the question of if Italy was even his friend because he was Germany. Did Italy stick around for who he was now, or for a ghost of someone Germany didn’t even know? Of someone he didn’t even remember? The question had been gnawing at his thoughts all day. A dull ache in the back of his mind as he joked around with Italy and spent the rest of the day in what could have been considered a domestic atmosphere. He sighed aloud and turned onto his back. It was then that he saw a shadow in the doorway.

“Germany?” It said.

Germany sat up in his bed, allowing the covers to fall off his shoulders and into his lap. “Italy.” He rubbed his eyes. “Couldn’t sleep?”

Italy stepped forward into the moonlight, his tan skin unusually pale in the blue light. He wore a T-shirt that was slightly too large for him over a pair of boxers. His hair was tousled, but Germany figured that was from tossing and turning more than anything else. “No.”

Germany nodded. “Me neither.”

Italy’s right hand crossed over his body and gripped his left wrist sheepishly. “... Would you mind if I shared your bed with you tonight?”

Uh-oh. “At least you actually asked this time.” Germany sighed, scooching over and pulling the covers back for him. “It beats you sneaking in while I’m sleeping.”

Italy smiled, his shy air disappearing entirely. “Yes! Thank you, Germany!”

Germany lay back down, glad for the darkness as it shielded Italy from the glowing blush on his cheeks. “Ja ja, just try not to take all the covers this time.”

“I will. Thank you, Germany.”

Silence reigned as Germany turned on his side, his back facing Italy. He shut his eyes, willing himself to go to sleep. Minutes passed and he didn’t get any more tired.

“Something is wrong.” It wasn’t a question.

Germany didn’t even turn his head. “No.”

The weight on the bed shifted as Italy turned to face Germany, propping himself up on his elbow. “You’re lying. I said earlier I would answer all your questions, remember?”

“I said there was nothing wrong, and there is nothing wrong.” Germany snapped. “Why can’t you just listen?”

“Do you remember when we became friends?”

Germany furrowed his brows. He wondered if Italy had figured out what was bothering him. “Unfortunately.”

“I say a lot of things, Germany. I love to talk! But I remember something I said that day. I said that we could protect each other, and I would disappoint you! It was a promise I made when we formed our alliance!”

“You realize that was not in the formal agree-”

“-Point being,” Italy interrupted. “It was a promise I made when we formed our alliance. Our friendship! So when I don’t listen to what you say, I am only making good on my promise.”

Germany turned over at this, fixating his beady glare on Italy.

He was smiling uncaringly, like Germany had just offered to tell him a joke. He raised his eyebrows, waiting for a response.

Germany contemplated what he said, wondering if he should even bother. How would it look if he asked Italy that question? Would that make things weird? Worst of all, what if Italy had befriended Germany because he was Holy Rome before? What then? “It really isn’t a big deal.”

“It is to me.” Italy said. He delivered it like his words had no weight. Like it wasn’t the very thing Germany needed to hear most.

Germany sighed and faced the ceiling again. He tried to speak as though he weren’t contemplating this all day. “When you found me, did you just want to become my friend to see if I was Holy Rome?”

There was only the briefest pause.

“Germany, do you really think that?” Italy asked, his voice heavy.

Germany frowned, not tearing his gaze away from the ceiling. “I don’t know. I was just wondering.”

“No!” Italy protested, shaking his head furiously. “Not at all! I only started suspecting it after World War Two!”

Germany finally looked at Italy. “Really?”

“Of course! I thought you just looked like him! The same way that Canada looks like America, or like Sealand looks like a gremlin! Before I was an investigator, Germany, I was your friend. First and foremost, always and forever!”

Germany felt a massive weight lift off his shoulders. “Oh. That’s good.” He said.

Italy lay down and faced him, his brown eyes gazing cautiously into his blue. His mouth split into a smile. “What do you want to do in Rome tomorrow?”

“Mm... we have to see the colloseum for sure.” Germany answered, fully aware that Italy was trying to distract him.

“It’s been so long since I’ve been seen it.” Italy reminisced.

“How long?”

Italy frowned, thinking.

Germany noticed Italy’s eyes were half closed, weighed down by exhaustion.

“Probably... actually, I don’t think I’ve been there since it was still an actual arena...”

“How long ago was that?” Germany asked, slightly shocked.

“Mm...” Italy yawned. “I don’t know. It’s too late to think.”

The corners of Germany’s mouth lifted as Italy’s eyes fluttered closed.

“Good night, Germany.”

“Good night, Italy.” Germany let his eyes close as well, immediately sinking into a heavy and merciful sleep.

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charcolor · 6 years ago

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Exorcism (Creep-P ft. Cyber Diva) Significance

creep-p talked about the significance of his song “exorcism” on his livestream on thursday and i think it’s really important to know about especially if you like the song so i wanted to make a transcript of what he said for anyone who missed the stream, it’s under the cut bc it’s a long story

TRIGGER WARNING FOR DOMESTIC ABUSE AND MENTIONS OF PEDOPHILIA

[...] so...I ended up having a meltdown. A huge meltdown, um, about someone trying to get, about someone who...really messed me up. And this person was constantly coming back in my head, so...I vented through lyrics, and I used Exorcism as the base. And next thing I know, I wrote lyrics to Exorcism, but they were a little different, so I tweaked them a little bit to be able to make them fit with the Exorcist theme. [...] So, now...I think the question still remains of, what is Exorcism even about?

So this is where it’s gonna get a little dark. And by a little I mean very. Um, heh, this is the part I’m gonna cry at, so...before the stream, before anything...I didn’t want to...I didn’t want to go in blind. So...everything I’m gonna say has been confirmed since of, as of yesterday. Um...I’m gonna cry, like talking about this does make me cry, so...it’s fine, I understand, but people have to understand, like, how serious I am about Exorcism, like how much it means to me. Um...so, I got confirmed everything yesterday, by someone who was in the situation, or was around the situation when it was happening. Fuck, I’m like shaking...um, so...I am a survivor of a lot of domestic abuse. Um...moreso mental and sexual than physical. Um...I’m gonna be revealing a lot of information...so, bear with me...so...

When I was...um, sixteen...I was on a website called--it was a website, I used to be a roleplayer on there, and it was great. It wasn’t like MySpace, it was like something similar to MySpace, but...so I had met someone through there. Mind you, I’m still trying to figure out who I am...and I met someone who roleplayed a character I really liked. And...I had already been having issues...um, so, I’m talking to this person...and, we hit it off, relatively quick...so...I think you could finally figure out that this song is about this person, so... [...] For those who don’t know--well, so this happened about, so we’re in 2018...this happened about seven years ago, this happened about seven years ago. So I was sixteen. And...I felt very unattractive, I felt all, all this. So, then, of course me and this person hit it off. And...let’s just say, if they would’ve found out how old he was, he would have gone to jail. He...was...significantly older than I was. Um...was significantly older. And...so...there was a lot of things that happened, that I don’t wanna share on stream, mainly because it was a bit...mm. But...he lied, about...a lot of things, including... [He was interrupted by a really nice donation message and he started to cry.]

So, um...so...um...I got out of the relationship, or, I thought I did. This person started making multiple accounts, and started to...stalk me. He was stalking me. I don’t know how long. It finally was made obvious to me it was him when I was talking to them and they started bringing him up a lot, and I realized that was him. And once I said, “I want nothing to do with this man, fuck him,” he stopped talking to me. He...messed up so much for me, that you guys don’t understand. The way I talk, and the way I talk about relationships, like you guys... [...] so much happened. And...so much has happened, and, um...later on...I get a lot of confirmation about a lot of the things, and...he had lied, about...a lot of things. He wasn’t who he really was, and I had never been so shocked in my entire life, I was seventeen when I realized who he was. I almost brought him to prom. I remember this, he asked me...he asked me, like, “oh...can I come, I wanna come, and go to your prom!” And I...was too nervous...and, I...I wasn’t, I told him, like, “I’m not sure if I’m going,” then we broke up and then I realized everything about this and I had never felt so relieved in my life that he doesn’t know my information or where I live.

So...he lied...about such a significant amount of things that I couldn’t believe people lied about. He said he got in some motorcycle accident and was sent to ICU and the people I was talking to was his family. That wasn’t his family. He...he lied about being in ICU, being in an accident, and being so heavily...so heavily, like, medicated, he lied about all that. And now looking back at it now, it was really, like, why would you lie about that? Like, all of this, all of this is just like, why would you lie about any of this? [...] It gets worse. Um...he catfished me, he wasn’t who he was. I, to this day, do not know what he looks like. I don’t know what he looks like. I don’t wanna know what he looks like. I never wanna know what he looks like. Never. I don’t know if he goes by he, I don’t know if he goes by they, I don’t know anymore. I don’t know. And, I wanna stay, leave it that way. I don’t wanna know.

And..it gets even worse from there, because...I’m a very forgiving person. Very forgiving. I could’ve forgave a lot. Catfishing, not so much, because it’s just like, why are you fucking catfishing, you’re dumb. Don’t, if you, if you end up finding who it is, don’t go to him. That’s it.

God, this was the last thing, and it broke me...um, when I figured it out, I was...he...so, back then, I was very, I was a person who was really confident about his hair. I loved my hair so much, and I thought I had nice hair, which I did, I did have very nice hair! And I also was like a scene kid, so I was just like, I really liked having my hair. So...he, um...he lied, about something very serious. And this is the one thing I hope my friend didn’t, shouldn’t have confirmed for me, which was, um...he lied about having cancer. He lied, about having cancer. He lied...about who he was, he lied about everything. He lied about so much. He...he stalked me, he...almost had all my information, he lied about such serious things.

And...so when I was having...the breakdown, about this whole situation...he...that whole situation was playing through my mind and I thought it was a nightmare. I didn’t want to deal with it again, so I wrote Exorcism. And that’s why Exorcism means so much to me. And then...like I said, like, the date even had a reason...today was the day that I thought he was gonna come back. I thought he was gonna come back because he’s still friends with someone I used to be friends with and once I figured that out I blocked them immediately. This was originally my Halloween upload...and then...and then, like, that happened, and as a way of retaliation...I was like, I don’t want him near me get him away from me get him away form me, like, I don’t want him near me. I don’t want him near me, tell him to get the fuck away from me. I...was so dissociated and freaking out, like, you can ask every single one of my friends, two years ago I was freaking out over this.

And then I uploaded Exorcism, right away...and then everyone had such a positive reaction to Exorcism...people don’t understand how much that meant to me...people didn’t understand how much that meant to me...I thought everyone was gonna hate it! I thought everybody was gonna hate it! And it ended up being one of my, one of the most beloved songs that I’ve ever written and I can’t say thank you enough! Thank you so much! Thank you! It validated so much for me, like you guys just don’t understand...you guys don’t understand how much that validated everything that I’ve done, everything that I went through and everything that...I stood for, and no one understands how much, when I saw, that people really like Exorcism, and...I had never been...so messed up over a situation...and to have fucking, like...a huge community back me up and be like, no, like, we love this song, we love you, we...you guys have no idea how much it meant to me. It’s currently at 3.2 million views, and I’m still in shock, I think, like, every day, like, I don’t deserve this amount of attention for this one song. And...the fact that this got so much attention...that, that got me all the way fucked up. It got me all the way fucked up, and people don’t understand, still, like, “why’s Exorcism so much to you?” It’s because it was about someone who fucked up my life!

There was so much I couldn’t do! I was so scared of relationships, shit, I’m still scared of the one I’m in, not because, the person I’m with is a horrible person, he’s an amazing person...but I don’t want a repeat! I’m so scared, every day! And...so...before, um...so, October eighteenth, was originally just any one normal day, but the minute i knew he was gonna come back, that was...my day of retaliation, my day of “you’re not getting near me again, you’re nowhere getting near me again,” and I know for a fact he knows about this song, and he knows this is about him, and I want to let him know fuck you, I hate you, I want you beat, I want you to be so far into the ground. I want you to stay away from me. There’s so much that this man has done, and I don’t want him anywhere near me. The minute I find him, the minute I know who is he, who he is, and if he’s near me, we’re throwing rounds! We’re throwing rounds!

That’s why i speak up for so many people who have been abused, and I feel so bad for so, for so many people that I haven’t spoken up for, because I could’ve made some type of difference, because if I didn’t speak my dumb ass up the time I did, I might’ve been in the same situation I was, seven years ago. [...] And...whenever people say...whenever people say...they were abused, or they were this and they were that, you gotta listen to them. You need to listen to them. You need to listen to them. There’s no, why, there’s no way in hell, this is not something people want, this is not something people want, it’s not. But what i do want is to let y’all know, hey! Stop! Stop! Listen to the person that’s freaking out! Why are they freaking out? Listen to the people who have been abused, listen to those people. There’s obviously a reason why they’re freaking out over this one person, there’s a reason. And I messed up so many times and I was the person who didn’t listen.

#vocaloid #creep-p #domestic abuse

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the-fandom-newsletter · 6 years ago

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Fandom Newsletter #4

Today is Friday, the 26th of October, and Welcome back to another Fandom Newsletter!

Writers: Atlas, Blackpurrl, Fyne, YoursTruly Editors: Fyne and YoursTruly

“Oh my God, Karen! You can’t just ask people why they’re white.” ~Mean Girls

Let’s get started!

First to YoursTruly with the Horror, Hannibal, Tim Burton, Animation, and Gaming fandoms--

Horror: Horror fans love the new Halloween movie! The movie has been a massive success among fans young and old! The movie gives off a nostalgic vibe, even referencing the older movies several times throughout the film. However, if you’re going to see this movie, stay until after the credits, there’s a little surprise at the end.

Hannibal: The Fannibals have began trying to bargain with show runner and producer Bryan Fuller for another season. The show left off on a not so satisfying conclusion, and many fans want more. Bryan Fuller has even teased the idea himself quite a few times. Will we get another season one day? Guess we’ll have to wait and see.

Tim Burton: Disney is offering, throughout the month of October, Halloween themed cruises. They even offer an onboard show featuring Jack Skellington and Sally. And you can even meet these characters for pictures! Now that’s a cruise! Also- The Nightmare Before Christmas celebrates its 25th anniversary this year!

YouTube: YouTube recently crashed worldwide for two hours. YouTube hasn’t said much about the incident, but problems like this are becoming more and more common on YouTube. Many people are wondering what the causes of these issues are.

Animation: Goretober is in full swing! Many animators have been uploading their daily Goretober art.

Gaming: The season of scary game releases is upon us! October is the month where many creators on platforms like Steam and Gamejolt are releasing their horror games in anticipation for Halloween.

Now to Blackpurrl with the Harry Potter and Bands fandoms, along with World News--

Harry Potter: Countdown to Fantastic Beasts: 27 days!

Bands: Did you know, about twelve hours of songs are uploaded to SoundCloud every minute? Insane!

World News: Denmark Shooting for the Digital Stars

Next to Fyne with the Sherlock, Supernatural, and Spooptober fandoms, as well as the weekly positive news--

Sherlock - Ever wonder how our beloved show even came to be? Apparently, for years, writers Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss took a train to and from Cardiff while working on Doctor Who, and discussed various projects they were interested in doing. One that kept coming up repeatedly was a modern-day adaptation of Sherlock Holmes. This reportedly went on for some time (with neither man making any particular effort to get it up and going) until Moffat’s wife, Sue, invited both men out for lunch. Her place of choice just so happened to be the Criterion, a watering hole and eatery in London’s Piccadilly Circus. It just so happens to be the same place where the fictional John Watson (Sherlock’s best friend) first hears of the famed detective. The two men got the hint and began working on the series, bringing us our show that we have today. I think we all owe Sue a little bit of a thank you, don’t you?

Supernatural - Did you notice that (according to Archangel Michael in the episode The Song Remains the Same) Dean and Sam come from the bloodline of Cain and Abel? So is this important? Or is this just another coincidence?

Spooptober - This year is the year that Halloween movie Hocus Pocus reaches its 25th anniversary. The premise of the movie is this: After moving to Salem, Massachusetts, teenager Max Dennison explores an abandoned house with his sister Dani and their new friend, Allison. After dismissing a story Allison says is superstitious, Max accidentally frees a coven of evil witches who used to live in the house. Now, with the help of a magical cat, the kids must steal the witches' book of spells to stop them from becoming immortal.A family favorite movie that almost everyone has seen and that is playing on at least one channel nearly every night of October. If you haven’t seen this iconic movie, you definitely should go channel surfing at some point this month.

Positive News - The words we use to talk about mental health can perpetuate stigmas. A new portrait project featuring people who have mental health issues aims to make us think again about the language we choose.

Lastly to Atlas with the Voltron, Musicals, and Movie fandoms--

Voltron: This fandom is a ticking time bomb set for December 14th. We are all going to die.

Musicals: George Salazar ships Boyf-riends!

Movies: Who else wants a live action Corpse Bride?

Now back to Blackpurrl with the weekly movie review--

Movie Review: Hannibal Rising

This movie relays the story of Hannibal Lecter’s childhood. Although most of the especially gory parts are not on camera, the viewer eventually knows exactly what became of the victim. It provides an interesting plot, and explains why the famous cannibal does what he does. I would not recommend this movie to anyone under thirteen or anyone who cannot handle tragic stories. Overall, I’d give it a 10/10.

And back to Fyne with the weekly trivia fact and quiz--

Trivia Fact - Did you know that the inventor of liquid soap became paralyzed after he slipped in the shower?

Are you an optimist, a pessimist, or a realist?

1. You fail a test. What is your reaction?

A. I'm stupid. I’m going to fail my exams.

B. This was just a blip. I’ll do better next time.

C. The questions were too hard. This is where my abilities stand.

2. You have quit smoking, but you accidentally have a cigarette. Which of the following is your reaction?

A. You have been set back, so you just go right back into the addiction.

B. You have been set back, but you believe you can quit again.

C. You have been set back, so you come up with ways to avoid similar circumstances that led you to the set back.

3. You are shown a picture of a man who isn’t smiling. What do you think this man is feeling/doing?

A. The man is plotting, rude, or experiencing something unpleasant.

B. The man is relaxing, thinking, or did not have enough time to smile.

C. The man is posing for the picture.

4. A close friend of yours sets you up on a blind date. How do you feel about this?

A. You have no clue what your date is like and you are afraid they’re going to set you up with a complete loser.

B. You have faith in their opinion and want to see for yourself what your date is going to be like.

C. You decide to see what your date is like and decide for yourself how well your friend did.

5. You’re a business owner who goes bankrupt. How do you proceed?

A. You see this failure as a sign that you are not meant to be in this business and pursue other options.

B. You see this failure as a lesson and use it to help you further your business in future reference.

C. You see this failure as a sign and choose to make plans to pull yourself out of bankruptcy.

6. You get a raise. How do you feel about it?

A. You don’t understand why you got the raise and you wonder if there is an ulterior motive.

B. You accept the raise happily, glad that your hard work has finally been recognized.

C. Yay! More money!

7. You’re an accountant and today you made a mistake with a number. What is your reaction?

A. You figure out where you went wrong, and then feel horrible about it for a long time afterward, questioning your abilities and worthiness as an accountant.

B. You figure out where you went wrong, fix it, and move forward.

C. You recognize the mistake and move on.

8. You have a bad day. Which of these is you after the day is over?

A. You believe that your life has been full of hardship and negative experiences.

B. You see the bad days as part of your life that help you grow or benefit you in some way.

C. Recognize that you had a bad day, and resolve to try again tomorrow.

9. You are struggling with groceries and someone comes to help you. How do you respond?

A. You become suspicious, tell them that you have nothing to give them, and maybe even yell at them to leave you alone.

B. You thank them and talk about their day or ask them about themselves.

C. You politely say thank you and either accept or decline their help.

10. You go on a vacation. Which of these is you?

A. Complain about everything you do and could potentially do, and eventually wind up not wanting to do anything at all but watch TV in the hotel room.

B. You want to experience as much as the location has to offer, even though you had no plans about what to do.

C. You enjoy the vacation and plan extensively about what you want to do and when.

Mostly A’s: You appear to be a pessimist. Always seeing the bad and negative in everything probably isn’t helping you be any happier or lead a happier life. Try and maybe appreciate things more often.

Mostly B’s: You appear to be an optimist. Always seeing the good and positive is probably helping you be fairly happy, and even leading to a happier life style. Though try not to be too optimistic all the time because it may end up hurting you in the long run.

Mostly C’s: You appear to be a realist. I guess you’re sort of a neutral character. Good for you.

(This isn’t physiologically proven, its literally just a test I made up in my free time so don’t take the results to heart and please do not be offended)

And finally, back to YoursTruly with the weekly book review--

Book Review- The Life Of P.T. Barnum is a fantastic book for anyone who loves a good biography. The book is a wildly entertaining autobiography by P.T. Barnum about his own life, starting from his childhood and following him through all his adventures. All in all, a fantastic book. 10/10

Wish our illustrator and writer Blackpurrl a happy birthday today! Comic is brought to you by our very talented artist, Blackpurrl. That’s all for this week, we’ll see you next week with another Fandom Newsletter!

Signing off,

Atlas, Blackpurrl, Fyne, and YoursTruly

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scyre · 7 years ago

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ayy its ya girl c! i’ve done up a little draft with the slight changes that were made now that we’re living in the moden au!! please read more for ... more.

DESMOND SAYRE

monty might not love social media and technological advances but they changed his life. his family still sucked, always grasping for power and rejecting change, but at least he didn’t feel as alone... not when he could text his friends and get immediate answers back from them. not having the time to dwell and sink in self pity really helped him.

ya boy also didn’t have to live his life thinking something was wrong with him bc he wasn’t sexually attracted to people like he was supposed to. he had access to google, he learned what asexuality and the spectrum was, and he knew more about himself and didn’t have to just ... not know. i think this made him sleep around less, get to know people a bit more, and while he’s still not an open kind of guy he didn’t really date much. it did however mean he stayed with laurel way longer than he should have... put up with way more crazy than he would have in the past.

he has instagram but never posts. seriously, he has one post from a year ago. he does like things though and is always commenting on posts. sometimes nice, sometimes not. he doesn’t have facebook, twitter, youtube, or snapchat. he thinks the snapchat filters are dumb and ruin perfectly good pictures. he also hates selfies and thinks they’re dumb. why does he even have insta? it’s probably the only way to stay up to date on hogwarts gossip.

i do think because everything online can be so negative, and escalate so quickly, monty never would have came out and admitted that he was bisexual/demisexual except to the people he’s told in canon. it’s still something he plans on taking to his grave and obliviating out of anyone who knew. the gay shame is real. get a grip boy.

i think he’s definitely got the aesthetic of like... the guy with gauges in his ears, maybe he has his eyebrow pierced, and he definitely still has the nipple piercing. i think he probably has more tattoos, exclusively wears leather jackets, combat boots, and ripped jeans, and wears a lot of plain colored shirts or black shirts. he still loves black. he will always love black. he wears a lot of it.

he hasn’t appropriated a lot of muggle culture into his day to day. i feel like he only got a phone in the last year and is awful at remembering to check it. it’s probably an older model too because he didn’t care what they gave him and it’s slate grey with no case because he lives on the edge. yolo. he doesn’t have any muggle cars or anything like that but he definitely has a netflix account and television because why not. his favorite show would probably be something like the good place.

ya boy still flunked out of hogwarts because that’s just how his life goes. he’s repeating his final year and you bet ya ass people tweeted about THAT for awhile. we love vague tweeting.

PHOENIX VASQUEZ

phoenix’s childhood is still relatively the same; he was adopted by the vasquez family. however, adopting wasn’t as easy as it had been back in the day because lycanthropy wasn’t as frowned upon in this decade as it would have been before. while people didn’t love it, it wasn’t something that meant no other family was interested, or other people weren’t willing to bend red tape. which means nix didn’t move around as much as a kid because his parents were able to keep working at their jobs in the states!! they only moved to the UK when he was fifteen as his grandmother was sick. so basically he moved to and started going to hogwarts in year 5 instead of year 1.

personality wise, nix is very similar. he’s still very awkward, very quiet, and is a genuinely nice person to everyone he meets. he’s more often about his lycanthropy as his parents never begged him to keep it a secret and it’s not uncommon for him to be making werewolf jokes at his own expense. he thinks it’s funny.

technology!! nix loves snapchat. he’s not huge on technology bc he’s kind of a hipster -- he still uses ballpoint pens and notebooks, doesn’t own a computer and only has a dinky phone that texts and calls. no data. he can only use snapchat when he’s near a wifi hotspot so you’ll sometimes see him getting frustrated with his phone when it starts buffering and flopping. he DOES borrow a friend’s computer to upload podcasts though because he’s a podcaster!!! he has a podcast called ‘howlcast’ and he does reviews of mainstream media depictions of werewolves and compares them to the reality. he also interviews lycanthropy specialists, advocates, and famous lycanthropes to talk about the werewolf experience. he kind of loves it?? he puts out an episode a week and does a Q&A on twitter straight after the episode goes up for any fans of the podcast.

nix doesn’t have a luxury broom or any of those fancy toys that the rich kids usually sport. he likes his regular ‘ol magical broomstick and doesn’t think a suped up car is something that he needs in his life. he good.

modern 2018 phoenix also died his hair a bluey teal color! he thought it was fun and tbh he is living his best life.

LAUREL DIAN

laurel’s family aspire to be the kardashians. they have a b level reality show, think something on tlc so they have their little cult following that laurel l o v e s. she loves the attention and loves the perks that come with it.

her aesthetic is probably like.. forever 21 / hipster / hippe chick. she wears a lot of crop tops, high waisted skirts, floral prints, lace, etc. everything .. and i mean everything ... is accentuated with red lipstick. that’s her aesthetic x 100. she has an iphone with a bedazzled phone case and probably drives a really compact car. her broom would be luxury too and she’s definitely on tinder select looking for cute boys (or girls) to bring home with her.

as for social media.. she has her hand in a lot of different platforms. she prefers facebook over most of the other ones. she also loves pinterest and is always pinning home decor ideas, cooking ideas, etc. she’s a feminist and sjw when it comes to twitter. it’s not uncommon to see her beefing with someone on twitter because they’re trolling or being rude/racist/sexist/etc. she loves tearing people a new asshole when they decide to spread their hate online. fuck off trolly boys.

she’s been in two high profile relationships in her life. the first was with monty sayre and that was a fucking nightmare. a lot of their relationship was caught on screen and its cringey whenever people tweet her pictures of monty and his new fiancee, or share photos of the two of them from when they were together. she might have dumped him but that doesn’t mean that she wants to be reminded of it all the time

she still works with dragons and they are frequently featured on her instagram, snapchat, and on the show. some of them even have their own little cult followings. its weird but kind of beautiful,

PIPPA CARSTAIRS

pippa being born in the 2000′s is the best thing that ever happened to her. truly. britney? christina? pink? oh my god she’s living. she loves pop music, loves concerts, and has a passion for professional cheerleading bc it's a legitimate sport now y’all! it’s her dream to be a professional cheerleader. maybe in the magical world if quidditch has them now?? we just dont know.

her aesthetic is blair waldorf chic. maybe a little more revealing. she definitely still wears heels, ignores dress codes, and always has her hair straightened perfectly. she is very very good with makeup -- think contouring and all that jazz. she looks like a million bucks literlly every day. it’s incredible.

pippa has a luxury car. i’m thinking it’s probably an suv?? she definitely would want something bigger and not your typical girly girl car. i’m thinking a black cadillac escalade. she doesn’t have a broom bc she still hates flying and heights. fuck that shit. as for technology, she’s got it all -- snapchat, twitter, instagram, youtube, etc. she also definitely has a youtube channel dedicated to beauty tutorials and has thousands of dedicated viewers. she’s done everything from contouring, costume make-up, etc. her channel is especially popular around halloween as she does a special called ‘the twelve days of pippaween’ where she does different costume makeup every day for 12 days. her most popular to date is ursula from the little mermaid! she also definitely has the latest iphone, macbook, etc, and it’s probably all rose gold. she’s a rose gold girl.

currently in the middle of an instagram war with her ex boyfriend. they’re both shady as fuck with their vague posting on finstas and it’s mESSY. we love a good mess!!!!! (this good be a good wanted connection if someone wanted to be her messy ex for the AU!!)

ALARIC ROWLE

i feel like wizards having access to technology changed things significantly for rowle. he was able to track down his birth father’s parents much easier and probably moved back to the UK when he was much younger. he definitely learned more about the war and was drawn into anyone whose narrative reflected what he wanted to hear -- that his parents were martyrs and that the dark lord had been in the right the whole time.

he definitely kept dueling. when his hand acted up, i think he would have been so desperate to fix it that he would have given into muggle medicines and treatments. he probably wears a splint on his wrist and his wandwork isn’t AS quick as it could be but he’s still one of the top duelists in the country. seriously, ya boy was good. him getting to continue being awesome might make him less of a douche. maybe. he definitely competes bc glory and loves every minute of it. a rowle who is less grumpy and super cocky? we stan.

he’s definitely a reddit troll. i feel like there’s a death eaters subreddit or something and he basically lives there and talks to other death eater sympathizers, former, or whatever, and slowly await the return of the ‘great days’. think alt right but .. y’know magical.. ugly.

he still teaches dada bc initially he needed money to pay off some wicked crazy medical bills for all the specialists and acupuncture and weird shit he did to fix his hands. even with the money he earns when he’s duelling, he’s in debt up to his ears.

i think he still has the scars that marr his face though bc as much as he will use splints or salves on his hands he is not gonna fucking undergo plastic surgery in the muggle world. he’d rather choke.

ANSEM WARBECK

ansem warbeck deserves social media. he is living his best life. he is definitely the guy who is constantly using ‘find my iphone’ bc he lost it, has a cracked screen because he forgot to buy the shatterproof screen protector, and changes his netflix password weekly bc he can never remember what it was. he’s also the snapchat king. i’d say he has 100+ streaks with as many people as he can convince to keep it up and he sends angry snaps when you ruin his streaks. they’re like his babies. one time he was running a fever and still managed to make streaks. there’s no excuse.

he still works as a curse breaker but i feel like he’s really like... stepped up gringott’s social media game. i feel like he took it upon himself to get them an instagram and is always uploading picture of whatever ‘cool’ treasure they can find. griphook keeps telling him they’re going to get robbed if he doesn’t stop bragging but ansem never listens.

the warbeck family is probably one of the few that have not acclimated to the technological changes at all. they won’t have anything to do with electricity, social media, or anything of the sort and look down on people that do. so ansem with his luxury brooms and his waffle iron are basically sacreligious to his family and his mom always cries whenever he talks about these things. it’s a whole Thing and just reinforces that arson is the best and ansem is the Worst.

#wizard:modernau2018 #modern au 2018.

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leanna-kay421 · 4 years ago

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Who am i? What am I about?

I'm Leanna, I grew up in a smal town called erwin and have all together five siblings. Two I grew up with In my childhood. Two I met in the beginning of my teen years. the other I only had contact with twice. But it wasnt a close knit cozy envirement I grew up in. It's kind of a bitter sweet thing. All those are different stories for another time. As of right now I'm Introducing myselfl.

I'm 25 I am in a committed rlationship with my amazing boyfriend. Who I believe is one of my soulmates. we currently live with my sister and are going to be getting a car and our own place soon. as for my career it's pretty much me being myself. It took a long journey for me to get where I am today. Ive fought to climb up to the top. Only to fall down on my butt plenty of times. Needless to say it wasn't easy.

As a child I found I loved to write and sing I was into fashion. I wanted to grow up and write my music and sing it. I loved to be dressed up in different kinds of styles with clothes , makeup, and hair. I was a creative person I am a creative person. wanting to be a singer stuck with me till I was told that it wasn't realistic. so I put my dreams on the back burner. I'm a nurturing person so I decided I wanted to own my own daycare one day. Then I dropped out of high school got married and then decided I'd just be a stay at home wife and mom. the marriage ended up being toxic and once again i put my dreams on the back burner. Untill I was 21 i just got this gut feeling telling me that there was something more out there. I wasn't sure what but it was something. I started doing research on owning your own business. I realized that being my own boss was something I'd like to do. I wanted to be able to be creative and work on things I loved. At that point I wasn't in a good place mentally, spiritually, and physically. But something was telling me it was time to get up and do something with my life. I tried some company that pretty much was a sham. I signed up to be an Amazon affiliate. that didn't work out. I even got o wordpress to create a blog. I didn't know what to do. I had so many creative ideas flowing through. It was as if I was going through some kind of awakening at the time. I just didn't know what to do. I started to want to write again. I started wanting to sing again. I started to want to be creative with fashion again. My blogging site just wasn't going anywhere. so I started writing songs and recording me singing. I started looking at different beauty influencer jobs to try out. I looked into avon and Mary Kay. I then decided I was going to go for avon. I started watching YouTube videos and training and prepping myself for it. I wanted to do something with jewelry so I started looking into paparazzi jewelry. I started wanting to write books again so I started to do some research on how to self publish. I decided I wanted to start uploading music to iTunes. I was scattered but trying to get somewhere. Eventually I finally decided that leaving my marriage was best. Not long after that I finally got into therapy. And started getting back in touch with my spiritual side. I started looking into what my life purpose was and doing a lot of soul searching. It honestly was a very emotional experience. But I found my calling I was sent here to help others and make a difference in the world. I didn't know how but I knew that it was time to figure out how.

I made a YouTube and started making pick a card readings. I made a Facebook group to do daily messages. I made a facebook page to make blogs. I know again with the blogs. I made an Instagram for my page and group. I eventually deleted my YouTube and Facebook page. The group is still there just not active. I learned that doing weekly readings and daily messages for a group of people was a little draining. I learned I needed to ground myself and that I still had some self work to be doing before I jump into something. I was being told that when it was time I’d know what I was supposed to do. So I did just that, then my other sister starts working for this buisness. Something drew me towards asking her about it. So I did, I liked what I heard and I felt pulled to do it.

I am someone who’s meant to shed light into the world. I am also a beauty influencer and I love it. It allows me to express myself and not only just post selfie’s and promote products. I write blogs of inspiration and advice from personal experiences. I do energy readings for the collective sometimes. I do readings for people if they want it. I post funny and inspirational quotes. I love being able to help people it’s been a slow progress but I’m finally on my way to where I wanna be. I now know it’s my voice and creatively that’s meant to help and heal others.

These are some Halloween inspired photos. Keep in mind that I’m no makeup artist. And don’t have the best lighting at the moment. Just a women expressing herself. ❤️❤️❤️

If you are interested in the products I do sell. Or want more information in general. Don’t hesitate to ask any questions. I’ll be glad to answer. Just sign up under my name and you can choose to be a customer or an influencer yourself. Much love to y’all have a bessed whatever time zone you may be in at this time. ❤️❤️❤️

#beauty #makeup #self work #inspiration

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finsterhund · 4 years ago

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Exhaustion and updates

Hoping it's just an issue on twitch's end or the ISP but my test stream had the occasional drop of frames and freezing for half a second. No issues to me but it was present in the VOD.

Really hoping that's not a thing that is going to occur commonly.

Might want to see about getting better upload speed.

But yeah. Expect an update on my computer soon. I've been very busy and very sore and tired from doing errands, setting up my computer (it's a heavy boy) and tons of stuff. Laundry tomorrow and I'm still sore from all the lifting and running around so I'll be out of it for a while still.

I'll be posting photos and stuff. I'm very proud.

I was and still am so anxious about my computer being okay. I'm paranoid about that sorta stuff. There were some hiccups and troubleshooting and I'm sad I didn't get the no CD patch of Heart of Darkness working on it, but it is happy and healthy now.

Spot from my friend arrived too. The black fur on the back is damaged somehow which means not as soft and also shedding. Upsets me a lot but maybe that's a reason to get this Spot a service dog vest.

Also not big enough to be the proposed "giant Spot" but large enough to take on trips and stuff. Good for hugs. So good for hugs. Second favourite Spot after the OG Cuddle Clone Spot.

My computer is a handsome machine. So many lights and fans. Graphics card has lights and fans, heatsink has lights and fan, etc.

Also my friend finally gave me his old monitor officially for real this time. Because I bought it off him. So I actually have space on my desk.

I also fixed my chair. It's still loud and squeaky and broken but at least the back stays up again.

Expect some crisp HoD footage soon. Planning a high resolution death scene video. It's a long time coming.

Also planning to use the absolute beast of a computer to get back into Minecraft and start playing Among Us with friends. I can't tell health wise if I'll be able to finally get into 3D modeling but perhaps. Especially if I can get a new chair or start physiotherapy.

I discovered a way that twitter is broken. If you report tweets for abuse towards you/targeted harassment and twitter decides that the tweets were abuse and against the rules but doesn't think that justifies terminating the entire account, the person who made those tweets is told specifically which ones they were and has their account locked until they manually delete them.

In case you're wondering, yes, that does absolutely inspire them to immediately go right back to targeting the person who got them a slap on the wrist.

Like, if twitter just temporarily banned them and deleted the tweets without explaining which ones they were that would be fine, but not temp banning them and just locking their accounts until they delete the offending tweets literally does nothing except open up the person harassed to more harassment.

Nobody who gets away with harassment and keeps their account is gonna say "uh oh, twitter shook its finger at me I better leave this guy alone."

No wonder the site is so toxic. Not even Tumblr moderation was this horrendous.

Back to positives, I'm hoping once I'm no longer physically and mentally exhausted to start drawing some more again. Maybe with my chair fixed it'll be easier.

A Paper Beast unfolded edition stream is on the horizon, as are HoD speedrunning practice streams. That'll be a good way to iron out whatever weird freezing thing happens.

Now that I no longer am putting away money for my computer I hope to get back to commissioning art. I've sorta lost the drive for it due to my physical and emotional health.

I'm hoping to be more active with friends in the coming months, even though seasonal depression has already started to punch me in the gut.

They already have christmas stuff out. Walmart didn't even have halloween stuff this year they just went straight to christmas. All I can think about when reminded of the holiday is how it's the reason my last dog is dead. I have absolutely no reason to get into any sort of festivities this year and I am dreading how the corporate world is going to smother me with it in a way that is unavoidable.

Don't think I'm even going to celebrate the Winter Solstice this year. It just feels wrong.

Friends are already talking about doing their shopping and getting gifts and I'm walking past the isles in the stores and it just hurts. Just wish this year could just be fall and then spring. No winter.

I know this year is tough for everyone so I don't want to ruin whatever comfort my friends may be getting from the holiday, but it's a painful reminder to me and I was already avoidant of christmas on account of celebrating the Solstice instead. Before I could celebrate christmas with friends who did and had my own fun surrounding it but now all I can think about is how the last light of my life died of a preventable respiratory infection because the emergency vet office was closed. I'm the one who should have died of respiratory issues. That's what I'm predisposed to. Not her. It's one of the most horrific ways to die and I'd only ever wish it on my worst enemies. How many times have I scraped by from viral pneumonia and everything else and when my Zippy gets kennel cough for no fucking reason they just fucking kill her without telling me.

The thing is, the Spot photos are from Christmas so I wish I could just associate it with Spot instead but no.

I meant for this post to be positive primarily but in writing this out I think I've pinpointed why the seasonal depression is so hard on me right now.

My friend and I are going to be watching horror movies in costume on Halloween eating candy so I'm looking forward to that.

A green apple scented Spot is also coming from Lilsprout (same person who made Penumbra) so that's something good to look forward to as well.

I may try weighting and scenting my new Spot who I'm planning to get a service dog vest for. Also if anyone knows how to fix heat damaged fake fur fabric please let me know.

I just wish I could ignore christmas. It's such an alienating and depressing holiday if your loved ones are dead and you feel alone and hopeless.

I've started taking melatonin and it is really helping me sleep. Apparently it causes very lucid dreams. The first night I took it I had a lucid dream that was like I was awake but not. Briefly the new Spot lying beside me shifted into being Zippy (her specifically, not Spot) and I felt such a profound comfort as if she had visited me. I feel that's what Red Spot originally felt like when I was little, thinking this imaginary dog was Spot visiting me.

Was sad when I finally woke up though. Tried to do the thing where I stayed in the dream but my back pain got too bad and I had to get up.

Once I've done the laundry tomorrow and had some time to rest I'm sure I'll be more active online again. I hope. Will is streaming the Seventh Brother on the 30th so a bunch of friends are finally going to see the movie that the tired and weak crying puppy is from.

I don't really have any tasks out of my house to do right now except maybe some more groceries in a couple weeks. Of course my desire to go to thrift stores is ever present. I help buy gas so I should get to go lmao.

Think I'll listen to upbeat music now and then take my medicine. Hopefully less serious updates in the future soon.

For now my test stream is still available in VOD form on my twitch http://www.twitch.tv/finsterhund and I'm planning to upload it to YouTube later.

Take care of yourselves, and if you see stuffed dogs I'm your travels that look like Spot... I am interested. 👀

#text post #negative #long post #update

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fountainpenguin · 7 years ago

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Hey, now that we're touching on the subject in your writing, want to tell us more about Sunnie and the gang? You know, personalities and who is playing host to which spirit? That kind of thing?

Yeah, I touched on them in THIS post, but admittedly that was very superficial information, and some of the information is slightly outdated too.

To be fair, I thought I’d have more time to introduce you to each spirit and host one at a time, since they weren’t supposed to appear in my works yet. “This Is Halloween” was originally going to be about the mirror caves throughout Anti-Pixie Isle for ~foreshadowing~ reasons that you’ll see later, but then this happened instead. Sorry for the info-dump. But not very.

Okay, so let’s talk about the zodiac spirits again. Luckily for me, I can just steal some of this stuff out of the Anti-Fairy worldbuilding dump I’m posting on the 7th since there’s no fanfic update that day, and link back to this post.

Be aware that this post is massive. But when you’re ready to learn, here you go.

NATURE SPIRITS AND ZODIACS

What is the point of you creating nature spirits for your fanfics?

Giving Anti-Fairies culture that doesn’t totally revolve around evil. Don’t get me wrong- this is definitely a ‘fic about Anti-Cosmo’s rise to power. It’s an “innocence to corruption” type of story.

However, I see canon Anti-Cosmo as a guy striking out mostly because his people are majorly discriminated against by the Fairies. I needed reasons for him to believe his people deserved to not be discriminated against, and reasons for the Anti-Fairies not to think, “Well gee, maybe if we stopped attacking people, they would accept us!” So, the way Anti-Fairies appear in my works is, many of them are good, cultured people who just happen to feel the urge to make mischief and deal with bad luck.

They’re bearers of bad news, but you shouldn’t kill the messenger, so to speak. Many of them are offended at being called evil. We’ll watch Anti-Cosmo get past the point of caring and embrace the evil title. That was one of the harder things for me in writing Frayed Knots, but I think I did okay.

Anti-Fairies are creatures of bad luck, so I started by giving them a zodiac and major beliefs in astrology, fate, destiny, horoscopes, and I built out from there. This was also my way of explaining things that appear in canon, like the Darkness, or the temple to the chicken seen in “Chicken Poofs”. Additionally, many Fairies believe the stars are Fairy warriors. Anti-Fairies believe they’re stars. H.P. belongs to a religion that believes fairy dogs can die. In the show, Sparky stated that they can’t, so the Zodii believe they can’t. Different stuff like that so I can encompass as many bits of canon in the show as possible.

Finally, it was nice to create an entire culture so starkly different from H.P.’s, who grew up in Fairy World in my fanfic Origin of the Pixies. Considering the mixed feelings between Fairies and Anti-Fairies, it seemed appropriate to give them drastically different cultures and beliefs. Additionally, many fans love the Anti-Fairies and wanted to hear more about them in the show, so I wanted to have fun with this. I also wanted to keep my readers engaged since Frayed Knots is my second fanfic and has to cover some of the same worldbuilding stuff we already saw in Origin. I wanted to keep some unexplored territory.

AND, I wanted Anti-Cosmo and Anti-Wanda to be kept busy a lot of the time, which is why we don’t see them with Foop in the later seasons. I didn’t want them to be purely working on evil plans, since it seems their son would have wanted to get in on that action. Instead, I gave them a culture that has super strong traditions and beliefs, and made Foop the oddball who still has loyalty to his culture and reacts badly when he sees Fairies mock it and the Anti-Fairies, but he still thinks most of it is dumb and doesn’t want to get in too deep, so therefore pulls away from his parents and does his own thing.

I knew I’d be writing an extensive ‘fic that would probably take me years to finish, so I needed to have fun.

Don’t worry- while Knots does include a lot of nature spirit stuff, the zodiac still just Anti-Fairy culture and isn’t what I would call “the main plot”. This is still an FOP fanfic that tries to stay close to canon without veering the story into tons of OCs. Anti-Cosmo will be doing a lot of things in this story that have nothing to do with the nature spirits. We don’t even meet Sunnie until the war over godchildren is over. Then we get a big burst of nature spirit stuff before it fades out and we pick up the other plotlines again.

What are the levels of nature spirits?

Wise Ancients - Major deities; for all intents and purposes, they’re gods. I prefer using the terms “nature spirits” and “Ancients”, but they’re basically gods.

Ex: Mother Nature (Space), Father Time (Time), Tarrow (Reality), The Hocus Poconos (Unreality), The Grim Reaper (Death), The Cycling Hen (Life), Prince Morn (Light), Princess Eve (Dark)…

Those are all the Wise Ancients I’ve thought up at this time. More might come later. They’re the overarching set, and the other spirits are their children.

The way I see it, space and time existed and mixed together. From this union, Reality was created. Reality gathered the sentience to take on solid, sentient form, and taught Space and Time how to take shape like him (Mother Nature and Father Time; Tarrow’s name obviously comes from tarot since he’s also viewed as the influencer of luck). Others followed suit.

Spirit Bears - Also considered Ancients, although they are always spirits of the land. They’re a subset of the Ancients who can only kiff-tie (I’m using that term to suggest reproduction in this sense) with other spirit bears. They’re basically personifications of different lands rather than aspects of nature. In Origin, we see H.P. doing paperwork and political things to get Pixie World recognized as an official World. In Knots, we see Anti-Cosmo dealing with the birth of the new spirit bear cub who represents Pixie World. Same timeline of events, but they play on different fields.

Ex: Fairy World (Tír Ildáthach), Anti-Fairy World (Hy-Brasil), Pixie World (Sprigganhame), Anti-Pixie World (Solis Infinitum), and what I suppose we would call Fairy Refract World (Avalon).

Things like Patio World and Mattress World are small towns that don’t have bears. I’m not sure about Hairy World and Scary World yet, but I’m leaning towards those just being nicknames for different planes of existence, so they don’t get bears either.

I drew a comic that I plan to color and upload about H.P.’s interpretation of the spirit bears vs. Anti-Cosmo’s. I also drew H.P. holding Sprigganhame in one of my Inktobers.

Demigods - The children of the Ancients. The term “demigod” is meant to be all-encompassing, so it always refers to the children of the Ancients, exception being people like Tarrow who are considered major deities and therefore Ancients. As far as you’re concerned, I have listed the Ancients above, and their children are the demigods.

Ex: Dayfry (Love; Friday), Saturn (Fire; Saturday), Sunnie (Water; Sunday), Munn (Sky; Monday), Twis (Soil; Tuesday), Winni (Breath; Wednesday), Thurmondo (Leaves; Thursday)

They’re major spirits. Imagine it like, Tarrow is Zeus, and the demigods seen here are the other major gods on Olympus.

There are other demigods (Ex: spirits that symbolize good harvests, good fortune, friendship, patience, travel, wood, stone, certain types of animals) who have similar powers to our gang, but while they might have small shrines, they don’t have official Temples. I mean, maybe some do, but that sounds complicated for my worldbuilding, so let’s not get into that.

Proper ways to address them would be as “the Seven” or “the zodiac spirits”. “Deity” is another acceptable term, as is “nature spirits”, though nature spirits refers to nature spirits as a whole, and zodiac spirits refers only to the Seven.

Minor Spirits - The children of the demigods. Some of them might have the same masteries as actual demigods, but if they aren’t born of the Ancients, they aren’t called demigods. Powers get watered down through the generations.

Ex: Multiple spirits of mist, clouds, lightning, mud, oxygen, etc.

Anything you get when two aspects of nature combine. Periodic table level and stuff. Also known as lesser spirits. There are hundreds if not thousands of them, but they’re not as important . Like I said, they tend to be combinations.

I feel like it’s also worth pointing out that Fergus Mór mac Eirc’s Wikipedia page lists his mother as “the mist”. Literally the mist. Thus, I decided that H.P.’s namesake here (H.P.’s name is Fergus in my headcanon) is the grandson of Sunnie. This gets increasingly interesting when you do further research and find out that Fergus the Great died in a “freak storm”. Apparently, Sunnie had a temper tantrum and he got caught in it. H.P. is terrified of Sunnie as a result. Considering that I dropped Anti-Cosmo in the Water Year at random when I originally decided he was born in the Year of the Black Lake, this is very interesting to me.

Additionally, when minor spirits have kids, you go even smaller. This is where you get guardians of individual rivers, mountains, or particular forest groves.

Nature spirits are “everywhere and everything”, but they all have a single manifested form that embodies their sentience, heart, and that they use to communicate. If they want to talk to you with words, they have to haul their manifested form all the way to where you are, which is often inconvenient if they’re light-years away. Even they can only travel so fast. Otherwise, the most they can do is mess around with their aspect of nature (their “mastery”). For example, by making streams bubble or leaves fall or wind blow.

So, all those signs you think you see in nature in answer to your pleas? Pure laziness. They usually only get up when they have really important messages to deliver, or they’re on the run. If you pray to them, they might be interested enough to respond, but they’re not going to get up to do it and tell you directly. They just shake branches and stuff to signal that they’re paying attention. Super simple stuff that is easily waved off as coincidence by those who don’t believe.

It’s a whole network of spirits, but don’t try to keep them all straight. Focus on the main seven.

Who are the zodiac spirits?

Seven nature spirits who are the grandsons of Mother Nature and Father Time. They each represent a different element on the Fairy zodiac, and are named after the days of the week, which was my way of excusing why the days of the week were called such in the cloudlands long ago. I cared.

Each of the zodiac spirits is a son of a deity called Tarrow the Luck-Twister (also called “the cosmic jellyfish”). He’s basically the deity of fate, and since Anti-Fairies are obsessed with luck, you can see why they like him.

However, each of the zodiac spirits has a different other parent (whom they tend to draw their element from), so they’re all technically half-brothers. Since nature spirits can produce children with either sex, some have a mother and some have two dads. Sunnie is an exception who was created asexually; he’s the water spirit and was formed from Tarrow’s tears after he got dumped by the Hocus Poconos.

I mean, the zodiac spirits are basically major region Legendary Pokémon, and then the minor spirits are each region’s lesser Legendaries. The Ancients would be Mew, Arceus, Rayquaza, etc. They’re above the main region Legendaries.

How does sex/gender work with the nature spirits?

Any nature spirit can deliver an “energy manifestation” (“child”) after they pair. The less dominant spirit will be the one to do so (*Dramatic music* The Fairy zodiac is organized according to age/dominance of the zodiac spirits). The “parent” who is “pregnant” with the spirit can decide the spirit’s sex, because some animals like insect queens can do that but I didn’t get to use that on the actual Fairies, so I gave it to the nature spirits instead because I don’t know.

My favorite dumb joke is that Tarrow is the ultimate dominant spirit against every spirit except for one, The Hocus Poconos, and this is actually the reason why he’s head over heels for her, because she’s the one that’s different. He only had one kid with her - Dayfry - who is his obvious favorite. The other kids were borne by their other parents. Nature spirit pregnancy only lasts for like thirty seconds after the spirits separate, I feel like I should point out.

Nature spirits have “true forms” and “projected forms”, as I will explain later in this post. While their true form would be their biological sex, the gender of their projected form may be different. Everyone interprets the spirits differently, remember? So if you interpret a biologically male water spirit as female, then the projected form you see would be a female water spirit. The nature spirit still interprets himself as male, and while he is aware of your interpretation, it doesn’t change the way he himself sees himself, which is his true form.

What are the Zodiac Temples?

Buildings in the cloudlands that are open places of worship for anyone who wishes to come, regardless of race. Anti-Fairies are by far the most frequent visitors. Aliens aren’t common since this is the Fairy zodiac here.

Each Temple has a public area that’s all decorated. That’s where most people visit. You can also visit one of a few more private side rooms so that you can meditate in peace and place your offerings in the provided dish.

The most important room in the Temple is the echo chamber, and only camarilla members and anyone of their zodiac who have been given explicit permission can visit there to meditate.

The Temples were created during the Sealing War, when the zodiac spirits were considered too powerful and imprisoned. Their manifested forms are inside the echo chambers of their Temples, bound with magical golden chains. As such, while they can still communicate by creating aspects of nature, they can’t go anywhere except inside their Temples.

Sometimes when you’re in their Temples, they’ll appear to speak with you, but only when they want to and their advice should always be taken with a grain of salt- they generally have their own agendas in mind, and even when trying to help, they struggle to comprehend mortal affairs.

As a general rule:

Dayfry (Love) - Knows his name carries a lot of weight and doesn’t like to throw that weight around. So, he rarely reveals himself. However, if you appear to be desperate and crying, you can probably bring him out; he hates seeing anyone miserable.

Saturn (Fire) - You can win him over with impressive offerings and displays. He’s a sucker for flattery, but probably won’t show up if there’s nothing in it for him.

Sunnie (Water) - Sometimes appears if you seek his advice and he finds you interesting, which usually means intellectual. If he doesn’t think you’re worth his time, then you aren’t and there’s nothing you can do about it.

Munn (Sky) - Will reveal himself to almost any Sky year who asks, as long as he’s impressed. He rarely gives out advice, good or otherwise. Mostly he just listens to people while he eats the offerings they brought, and cracks jokes.

Twis (Soil) - Reveals himself next to never, even to his own camarilla representatives. Mostly, he only approaches a Soil High Count or Countess. No one beneath them has enough power to interest him. He’s a stubborn butt.

Winni (Breath) - Doesn’t always appear, but when he does, he’s nosy and likes to tell you what to do. Likely to get offended when you reject his advice, even when it’s terrible.

Thurmondo (Leaves) - Might appear if you push him hard enough, though he’s pretty nervous and spacy and doesn’t like offering suggestions. Not too helpful.

A nature spirit who gets “killed” while out and about will wake up again in their echo chamber. Like the shaman’s reincarnation site in Populous: The Beginning, though I don’t think many of you know that computer game. I was raised on it. No Temple means no reincarnation, so any Temple lost will send the camarilla into an immediate frenzy to rebuild it.

On the subject of Populous, your mana charges faster when you have a higher population. I borrowed that idea for the zodiac spirits too. More people born in their year on the zodiac boosts their power. People of their zodiac actively practicing in their name (namely, visiting a Temple) boosts their power further- no matter what race those visitors are, or which Temple they’re in.

So yeah, if you’ve ever wondered why they refuse to strike their own people, it’s because it hurts them. They have more fun knocking each other’s forces down and cutting each other’s powers supply than they do actually paying attention to the political and moral skirmishes going on. You probably shouldn’t ask them to help you out in times of war. They’d just as easily wipe out your allies who were born under different zodiacs. They play for their own team.

What do the zodiac spirits do?

Act as impartial votes on matters that concern multiple races, mostly (like the Bake-Off and the Olympics). We saw Mother Nature in “Balance of Flour”, but her children and grandchildren sometimes take the role of judge instead. They’re all in agreement that Nana’s brownies are delicious, much to Anti-Fairy irritation.

Mostly they chill at their Temples, snack on their offerings, and badger people to make monuments of them. It’s more complicated than this, but this is all you need to know for now. Just realize that the nature spirits have their own agendas and don’t like sacrificing their wants for mortals, and you’re good.

Yes, they are very powerful and they could snap their fingers and grant you a miracle as long as it falls within their zodiac influence, but that would be bad storytelling. Their powers are what got them into their high positions. They’re considered deities for a reason. But nowadays, their powers are limited due to being bound to their Temples. Mostly they just talk to you and give advice instead of solving all your problems.

What do the zodiac spirits NOT do?

Don’t worry - No major quests in the name of the spirits, no cryptic prophecies, and no manipulating anybody’s life without their knowledge. No major cosmic games that we’ll see Anti-Cosmo get dragged into.

The spirits definitely have their own agendas and sometimes use mortals as means to achieve an end, but the “cosmic game” they’re playing right now is ~mostly~ a competition about who can get the most worshipers and monuments. Like I said, it’s more complicated than this and there are rules that I as the author need to know to keep them in check. We can go into that one day if you want, but let’s get deeper into Knots first. These are the basics. All you really need to know is that Sunnie is a sore loser and he rage-quit a long time ago, so he doesn’t join the current play until he gets his hands on Anti-Cosmo.

But the “cosmic game” isn’t some major world-shattering thing. It just gives the spirits something to do to play with each other. Everyone’s gotta have something to work towards, especially when imprisoned.

The spirits are minor gods who are easily bored and need the camarilla to play card games with them and read bedtime stories more than anything else. Anything that keeps them entertained. A bored or angry spirit is the kind of spirit who will mess around with nature to the point that it’s annoying (Ex: Sunnie might dry up a river, whereas Saturn may make a volcano erupt).

What are true forms, projected forms, and manifested forms?

Manifested form - The single being that basically holds the brain and heart of the element or aspect of nature in question. Ex: Death is a huge thing. The Grim Reaper is Death’s manifested form. This is his soul, his brain, his mouthpiece, etc.

True form - The form a nature spirit was born into. The spirit sees himself in this form. For example, Sunnie’s true form is as a creature made of black crystal, with lynx-like ears. He has turquoise eyes and wears a turquoise cloak. He has really long white hair. That’s how he sees himself. That’s the way Anti-Cosmo sees him when they kiff-tie. It’s taboo to discuss or make monuments in the shape of a nature spirit’s true form. Immortals, however, can’t see projected forms, and only see true forms.

Projected form - The way a mortal interprets a nature spirit. This would be Sunnie’s water genie form. The Darkness projects the black and red vortex we saw in “Wishology”. Tarrow projects his jellyfish. Their true forms show very obvious weak points on their bodies, typically their chests. I mean really, really obvious. Flashing and glowing kind of obvious. Projected forms don’t show those weak points. Anti-Cosmo interprets Sunnie as a water genie, but Sunnie can’t see what Anti-Cosmo interprets him as; that’s his projected form. Sunnie only sees himself in his true form.

What does it mean to host / take a nature spirit’s favor?

A favor (spelled “favour” in Knots) is a piece of jewelry in a zodiac color. It can be any small token or piece of clothing. The spirits generally have a form they prefer (listed by spirit below), though shapes and sizes may differ, especially based on the personal preference of the one carrying it. The spirits are not technically the favors, though sometimes it’s believed that they are.

It’s very important to note that the spirits ONLY take members of the Unseelie Court as their hosts. Namely Anti-Fairies. This is because Anti-Fairies turn to smoke if they’re “killed”, and automatically regenerate within a few seconds or minutes. This means that if another member of the Unseelie Court, like another Anti-Fairy, turns to smoke near them, their particles might get mixed together when they reform. The same is true for the nature spirits, who turn to steam. Their particles combine as they regenerate. That’s kiff-tying.

So this is all… sort of a cross between “Miraculous Ladybug” and “Steven Universe”, apparently. But also Populous: The Beginning. Listen, I already had to drop my original plan of Anti-Cosmo’s accidental influence over bad luck when I discovered “Milo Murphy’s Law”. I refuse to drop the nature spirit stuff too.

As of now, 4 of 7 favors are held by the camarilla. Twis is extremely picky about who he gives his to, and Dayfry’s favor was lost a long time ago and hasn’t yet been found. Which spirits have active hosts depends on the camarilla at the time. When a new High Count / High Countess takes power, their old camarilla shifts out and a new one is called.

If you’re carrying a zodiac spirit’s favor but you’re not on the camarilla, you have to return to the Temple and return the favor to the spirit. That spirit then chooses if he wants to take a new host or take a break for awhile instead. Sometimes the break-ups can be difficult and a spirit will refuse to accept the new camarilla member, and instead throw a fit until the High Count or Countess reluctantly reinstates the old. Sometimes the extinction burst can’t be endured /shot

If a spirit has a host, they can split their awareness between their manifested form, their Temple, and as many hosts as they have, viewing all locations simultaneously. A spirit with no host is limited to viewing only their immediate surroundings and their Temple.

Rogue spirits can take hosts too, but rogue spirits usually avoid the cloudlands because that’s the territory of the main spirits and they don’t want to infringe. They hang out on Earth or other planets in the universe where their parents or older cousins won’t boss them around. Rogue nature spirits can only manifest their favors as simple beads on a simple string. You may have noticed none of the zodiac spirits has a necklace design. Those are considered “simple” and are for rogues. The zodiac spirits are too haughty for that nonsense.

There could be a few Anti-Fairies who’ve met rogue spirits and have agreed to carry their favors, but that’s something they’d likely want to keep to themselves. I don’t imagine rogue spirits are looked on very favorably. But it probably depends. A small town might worship a particular rogue who sticks around their area and always selects hosts in that town. Who knows.

The seven zodiac spirits mutually agreed to only have one host at a time for quote-unquote “cosmic game” purposes to cut down on power-playing. Thus, as a rule, they default to one of the two camarilla members for their zodiac. Because it’s Anti-Fairy culture to hold the camarilla position and retire with dignity if replaced, that creates a regular turnover rate and prevents the spirits from being stuck with someone who refuses to give their favor back and dies alone with it somewhere.

I mean, there’s no rule saying they HAVE to pick from the camarilla. But that generally gives them the most influence over politics, and it would certainly cause a stir among the Anti-Fairies if a random commoner was running around representing them and attracting attention.

What does it mean to be bound to a Temple?

First, I want to point out that the chains binding the zodiac spirits are gold. On the mural in the Blue Castle, the chains are painted on with inrita, the chemical that drains Fairykind magic. Touching the chains in the mural makes an Anti-Fairy’s skin tingle, and their fingertips will go numb for about two minutes. Inrita has no effect on the nature spirits, but inrita is painted on the mural to remind the Anti-Fairies that gold has a similar, painful effect on the nature spirits that inrita has on them. That probably won’t ever come up in Knots. We’ll see.

Being bound to the Temple means the zodiac spirits have a manifestation of themselves chained within their Temple. However, this is a bit difficult to explain, so I’ll do my best. Technically, the zodiac spirits still exist on Plane 23. Plane 23 isn’t physically “higher up” than the other planes. It overlaps every plane. Passing into Plane 23 puts you on the spirit level, and the spirits can wander around and see people, even if they can’t directly interact by touching them or anything. They’re like ghosts.

The zodiac spirits are bound to the Plane 23 version of their Temple. Therefore, you won’t see them every time you visit the echo chamber, although they can see you. They can choose if they want to create a manifestation of themselves within their echo chamber, which is pretty draining, but they can do that and will if they want to talk to you. It’ll knock them out for a week afterwards, though, so they can’t do it with everyone.

Okay, so then we get this:

Sunnie’s manifestation there is what Sunnie can use to communicate with Anti-Cosmo directly, using his mouth and words. That’s the aspect of Sunnie that Anti-Cosmo kiff-ties with. What this means is, this Sunnie turns to steam and Anti-Cosmo turns to smoke through a special ceremony where Anti-Cosmo agrees to carry and care for Sunnie’s favor, and then, well… knives are involved.

You’ll just have to watch things unfold in Knots to see how that goes down: All you really need to know is, Anti-Cosmo is basically Sunnie’s yoo-doo doll when they’re kiff-tied. Sunnie can feel everything Anti-Cosmo feels, as well as see the world through his eyes and hear through his ears. Sunnie used to be able to see the universe without a host, but he can’t do that while he’s bound. When Sunnie broke his tie with Anti-Cosmo in “This Is Halloween”, we saw Sunnie’s manifestation again. That’s the little Sunnie. The Prince of Water is still at the Water Temple, and has the ability to vaporize his manifestation at any time. However, if he did that, he wouldn’t have any other manifestation, and would completely cut off his awareness of what was going on in the Castle.

The Prince of Water can continue creating manifestations to talk to other people in the echo chamber even while kiff-tied with a host. As I believe I mentioned, the zodiac spirits can create lots of manifestations of themselves. However, it’ll knock them out for a week, and the manifestation will disappear if it isn’t tied to a mortal host. And, for “cosmic game” reasons, the zodiac spirits all agreed that they’re each allowed only one host.

Technically, because Sunnie quit, he’s not bound to that rule. He can have as many hosts as he wants as long as he’s not playing, but he would have to rescind all but one to enter the current play. However, that would be out of character for him and then he wouldn’t be Sunnie. When Anti-Cosmo meets Sunnie, Sunnie explains that he hasn’t had a host for… I think it was nine hundred thousand years. He’s a sulker.

Okay, are you following? This is where it gets trickier. The Princely forms of the nature spirits can still interact with one another despite being bound. Imagine that Plane 23 is an empty white void, except the zodiac spirits can see all the Temples. If they weren’t bound, they could see everything. So, the Prince of Water can basically go as far away from his Temple as he wants, floating in an empty white void, until he meets another spirit. Probably the Prince of Soil.

They can hang out, talk, picnic on food from their offering dishes, kiff-tie, whatever they want. They’re just in a white void that occasionally has floating Temples. The golden chains stretch forever. Like I said, if they weren’t bound, they could see all of Plane 23. But while they’re chained, it’s a void for them.

That’s what it means to be bound. The kids are grounded from playing outside unless they’re supervised by a host, but they can still play with each other inside and hang out in their rooms. So obviously, Winni and Thurmondo are together like, all the time.

Don’t really know how much we’ll get into this in Knots. We’ll see hints of Anti-Cosmo floating in the white void when he kiff-ties with Sunnie the first time.

OKAY! That was the encompassing overview that I was going to share in the worldbuilding post next week, but it’s fine, you can have it now.

Now, let’s look at each zodiac spirit in more detail. Their powers were mentioned in a previous post. Now we’ll look at them more as people and demigods.

TARROW: The Cosmic Jellyfish

Deity of creation, fate, and destiny. Not technically represented on the camarilla. His color is red, and the First General wears a magical red cloak with a jellyfish clasp. The First General does not host Tarrow or carry his favor, but only strives to act impartially and make the final call if the camarilla get locked in a debate. He is meant to act impartially.

The cloak is mostly only worn when appearing before the public, especially during ceremonial events. Anti-Buster, the First General before Anti-Cosmo whom we see in Knots, adores it and wears it almost everywhere, except when he’s sleeping. He thinks it makes him look dramatic and you will see him constantly swishing and flicking it during this story.

DAYFRY: The Hummingbird, Leader, and Peacemaker

Love Years: 1989, 1996, 2003, 2010, 2017; Fairy New Year starts March 15th)

Mastery: Love, balance, loyalty, duty, politeness, gentleness, sacrifice, honor

Parentage: Reality (Tarrow) x Unreality (The Hocus Poconos)

Preferred Favor: Amethyst ring, usually worn on left middle finger

Modern Medium: None (Would probably be Anti-Kanin (Caden))

Overview: Dayfry is the King Solomon archetype- the wise leader of the zodiac spirits… or at least that’s what he tries to be. In reality, he’s a social creature who loves getting his family together to play games and enjoy the holidays. He tries to balance them all out by rushing around and soothing everyone, and keeping them from strangling one another.

All the zodiac spirits gave their names to the day of the week they were imprisoned in their Temple. Coincidentally, they were all imprisoned on different days, in the order of their birth. Wow! Amazing mythology coincidence! Dayfry, of course, gave his name to Friday. Friday is the first day of the week in the Fairy calendar. The work day starts Friday afternoon, and it goes until Wednesday afternoon. People get Thursday off, since the Big Wand gets recharged on Friday morning as we learned in “The Big Fairy Share Scare”, so obviously it must be running at its dregs on Thursday, and people don’t want to use magic or go out and about too much. Friday is a late start day every week. Nice. Additionally, Friday the 13th obviously occurs on Friday. Thus, Dayfry is a very respected deity in Anti-Fairy culture.

Because of this, Dayfry doesn’t get out much. He may be social with his brothers, but he’s shy around mortals because he’s a huge celebrity. Also, he doesn’t like kiff-tying much. I’m sure he’s done it with a host before, but it’s just not interesting to him. We’ll only see him once in Knots, briefly, when he arrives to visit at the new Water Temple with all his brothers before it gets consecrated with Anti-Cosmo’s blood.

As previously mentioned, Dayfry is the only child Tarrow had with the Hocus Poconos, and is his dad’s obvious favorite. He’s present in spirit at a lot of ceremonial events, but he likes to stay out of the limelight. Like I said, shy celebrity archetype.

Note that Munn is the spirit of kindness and caring for others, whereas Dayfry is more the spirit of acting professional even when you have to work with someone you don’t like. Dayfry is the spirit of swallowing your pride “for the greater good”, of loving the people and prizing the community as a whole above yourself. Additionally, Dayfry is more the spirit of thoughtfulness and wisdom whereas Sunnie is education, logic, and hard facts.

Everyone is always shocked to hear that Dayfry is single and possibly aromantic asexual. But, well. Spirit of youth and virginity, I guess. I figured that a spirit of Love should either be completely asexual or completely pansexual, and since we’ve already got Tarrow running around… yeah, I went with asexual. Also, he’s purple. That’s obvious. He’s the spirit of balance, after all, so it just makes sense that if all his brothers are paired up, he just hangs out by himself as the odd one out. Not that he really minds. You could say that he gave his gift of love to mortals.

Temple: High South (Navy) Region - Plane 4 - Crowfeld, Anti-Fairy World

The Love Temple isn’t far inside the border of Anti-Fairy World, as it’s one of the places that non-Zodii Fairies frequently visit too. It’s actually the church-like building where Cosmo and Wanda were married as we saw in “School’s Out: The Musical”. I mean, come on, guys. It’s purple and people get married there. That was obvious.

Dayfry’s Temple is mostly your stereotypical place of worship. It’s a reverent, quiet area that allows peace and self-reflection and whatnot. It’s shaped like a circle and his echo chamber is in the very middle of it.

Bonds:

Dayfry is on decent terms with all his brothers. They mutually respect him. As the spirit of Balance, he has healthy purple bonds with all of them. However, he has no interest in kiff-tying. He just kind of does his own thing.

SATURN: The Lizard, Warrior, and Team Dad

Fire Years: 1990, 1997, 2004, 2011, 2018

Mastery: Fire, energy, comfort, emotional strength, passion, family, justice

Parentage: Reality (Tarrow) x Light (Prince Morn)

Preferred Favor: Ruby bracelet

Modern Medium: Anti-Julian (Electro) (Note- I pronounce his name with the ‘H’ sound. I… I don’t know. He’s just always been that way for me.)

Overview: Saturn is the energetic, passionate warrior always willing to take up arms and fight to defend his loved ones. If you mess with his family, you mess with him. He’s even willing to deliver the first blow if he suspects you might mess with his family, though he’s not quite as paranoid about everything as Sunnie is.

Saturn is short-tempered, but as the embodiment of Energy, he’s also super productive. This guy gets things done, and fast. Quality may be questionable sometimes. You can perhaps see why he doesn’t get along well with Twis, who prefers to take things slow and do them right. In mythology, Saturn is the guy who cuts corners, and always has to be humbled by going back and doing them over again more carefully. Though when he doesn’t want to, sometimes he gets frustrated enough to set things on fire. Obviously, when volcanoes erupt, Anti-Fairies panic that someone has horribly offended Saturn.

Saturn is also said to have created the first genies, on level with the creation of Adam and Eve. These genies are called Asja and Galeras, and were mentioned in THIS post awhile back. As a genie breeder, Anti-Cosmo obviously has an interest in Saturn, and visits his Temple when facing major decisions regarding his genies.

So, Saturn is the warrior who cares deeply for his family. That’s probably his main personality trait: His passion. He stands up for what he loves and acts as a brave captain leading the armies of the nature spirits in battle in mythology. He’s easily irritated and revenge-seeking, definitely not someone you want to upset. He tends to devise sick and twisted tortures for those who offend him. He’s not exactly sly and subtle- he’s just the unstoppable, terrifying force, and if you engage him in battle, you will almost certainly lose.

However, he’s not so hot-headed that he’ll forgo logic to fight you. His military training always takes priority. Saturn isn’t the rash enemy who charges you when he’s taunted. He’s the brilliant battle captain who will organize his troops, calculate your weak points, and destroy you. He relies heavily on his faithful strategist, Sunnie, to help him organize his forces, although Sunnie usually tries to calculate plans that result in the least amount of people getting hurt, whereas Saturn is the guy who does care about casualties, but considers them a necessary evil to be sacrificed to win the war if need be.

Previously, I pointed out that the Fairykind don’t have important beliefs about solar or lunar eclipses, because they can’t see those events from the cloudlands. Though, they do have the Fairy-Clipse. Anyway, it seems appropriate to state this again seeing as Saturn is the child of the sun / light / day god and Munn the child of the moon / dark / night goddess. There aren’t any myths about Saturn, Munn, or their parents in regards to solar or lunar eclipses.

Temple: Far West (Maroon) Region - Plane 6 - Shadeblink, Anti-Fairy World

The Fire Temple is shaped like a chocolate chip. It’s all black, smooth, and shiny, with colorful windows where different flames burn behind the glass. There’s a transparent column in the center of the Temple where waves of fire flicker from the bottom and head up towards the top, and burst out occasionally like a colorful volcano. The echo chamber is at the base of this column (not transparent).

This Temple will most likely appear in Knots, probably more than once, but I haven’t gotten to that point yet.

Bonds: (Ordered from “best(?)” relationship to worst. Note that the Anti-Fairies took note of the bonds that the nature spirits share, and believe that similar relationships extend to those born in their year. For example, Saturn and Munn have a close bond, a “yellow” bond, so therefore they believe that Fire and Sky years are naturally compatible.)

Yellow - See Munn’s yellow section

Blue -See Sunnie’s blue section

Pink -See Winni’s pink section

Purple - See Thurmondo’s purple section

Green -See Twis’ yellow section

SUNNIE: The Turtle, Scholar, and Strategist

Water Years: 1991, 1998, 2005, 2012, 2019

Mastery: Water (+ ice), focus, tact, introspection, education, logic, tranquility

Parentage: Born of the tears of a god

Preferred Favor: Turquoise brooch, clasp, or badge

Modern Medium: Anti-Cosmo (Julius)

Overview: Sunnie is basically a self-serving conspiracy nut who takes advantage of Anti-Cosmo for his own gain, but only when he wants to. He doesn’t like going out of way for things like that. That’s wasted energy, and isn’t practical. It took he and Anti-Cosmo a while to warm up to each other, but they’re usually a good team who work well in sync, especially when studying and making plans. It’s just… they have opposite attitudes about a lot of things. Sunnie will always prioritize survival, especially of himself, whereas Anti-Cosmo prioritizes things like protecting or helping others, even if it puts him at risk.

Sunnie doesn’t really get the concept of honor, and will frequently take the coward’s way out by running off when things get tough. He doesn’t like to get involved, and when he does, it’s out of necessity. He can be very blunt and calculating, not afraid of stepping on people’s feelings in order to relay accurate information. However, he has low self-esteem and gets panicky and flustered in the face of criticism. He’s easily offended when holes in his plans are pointed out. He’s a scholar and a strategist. Book-smart, but not people-smart.

As previously mentioned, Sunnie is a strategist who puts his all into thinking, and so he’s also a very sore loser. While he doesn’t yell, he pouts and sulks a lot, and will often vent to Twis as Twis plows his fields. Captive audience, right? Sunnie is a complainer, but as a strategist, he does like to try and fix things. But only after complaining and sulking and having his feelings soothed. He likes having his back stroked and patted while he sprawls across your lap.

Sunnie is the scholar who loves to learn. He’s the guy you’d make offerings to when you have major exams coming up. He also has some stereotypical cat-like behaviors, such as sitting on your keyboard when he wants attention and knocking things off desks and cabinets just because he can. You can scold him, but he’ll give you that, “Try me” look and try to stare you down.

In addition to the liquid form of water, Sunnie is also the demigod of snow and ice. Technically he can also be the demigod of boiling water and steam, and he is, so long as we’re talking about steam from water. Fairies turn to dust and Anti-Fairies turn to smoke, but the nature spirits turn to steam. Sunnie has nothing to do with that.

Despite his sacred animal being the turtle, Sunnie is a very agile creature, and this gift extends to those who carry his favor. He’s quick on his toes and capable of rebounding off walls and ceilings with ease in a fight. One of the highlights of Anti-Wanda’s life is the time she convinced Anti-Cosmo to dress up as one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and take advantage of Sunnie’s agility field bonus. He denies this ever happened.

Temple: Central Star (Purple) Region - Plane 3 - Inkblot City, Pixie World

After H.P. knocked the old Water Temple down because of reasons, Sunnie’s bonds broke and he escaped. Anti-Cosmo chased him down and ordered H.P. to build Sunnie a new Temple. As such, the modern Water Temple was rebuilt in Pixie World, coincidentally also fulfilling the requirement of the law that in order to be legally called a city in the cloudlands, a place must have a Temple on the premises. Funny how things work out sometimes.

The modern Temple is square and very fancy. H.P. spared no expense, much to Anti-Cosmo’s horror at the over-the-top tackiness of the place. It makes its first (fully-built) appearance in “Sunnie Rise”.

The echo chamber is in the “undercloud” area, in the basement.

Bonds:

Yellow - See Twis’ yellow bond section

Blue - Saturn is Energy, Sunnie is Focus. Together, as Stone, they act as though hyped up on coffee and energy drinks.It’s worth pointing out that when I say, “as Stone”, we’re not talking about Gem-like fusion here. No. The Prince of Stone has two forms- either Saturn wearing Sunnie’s favor, or Sunnie wearing Saturn’s favor. It’s usually the first way around, Saturn being more dominant by nature. It’s the same title, even though the two are different.

The personality, mannerisms, agenda, and speech pattern of the more dominant spirit will remain intact, with just a bit of influence from the lesser spirit creeping in (for example, Sunnie’s agility bonus, or Saturn’s battle training); it’s not quite as harmonious a union as Gem fusion. It’s just one spirit borrowing the other one’s powers for a boost. The other spirit is essentially along for the ride, with no ability to control the body- they merely observe the outside world from a passive standpoint while the dominant spirit draws from their energy.

Basically, imagine Saturn wearing Sunnie’s brooch, his personality intact, but hyped up on energy drinks and with the grace of a dancer. The personality is the same, but the physical condition here (energy drink influence) and level of ability (agility) are different. The Prince of Stone will work ceaselessly on whatever task you set him too, usually without getting too distracted.

And of course, when they come apart (the more dominant spirit takes off the less dominant one’s favor), the less dominant spirit will be “pregnant” for about thirty seconds before giving birth to - you guessed it - a spirit of Stone with a personality and interests similar to whatever was just going on with its “parents”. The title of prince is reserved purely for when two demigods wear each other’s favors, though, and isn’t passed on to the energy manifestation. The “child” is simply called a minor spirit of Stone.

Pink - See Thurmondo’s pink section

Purple - See Munn’s purple section

Green - See Winni’s green section

MUNN: The Albatross, Prankster, and Traveler

Sky Years: 1992, 1999, 2006, 2013, 2020

Mastery: Sky, acceptance, compassion, hope, faith, cheer, speed, safe travel

Parentage: Reality (Tarrow) x Dark (Princess Eve)

Preferred Favor: Sapphire piercings (usually earrings), but for those uncomfortable with piercings, his favor can even manifest as headphones

Modern Medium: Anti-Wanda (Venus)

Overview: Munn has a cheery disposition, quick to joke and look at the bright side, though he does have his nervous moments. However, he would rarely be described as “sad”. He gets disappointed at times, but he usually shakes those feelings off without dwelling on them much. He’s just a naturally happy guy, even in very stressful situations.

Munn plays the antagonistic role in much of Anti-Fairy mythology, as he’s viewed as a prankster who often taunts other spirits and creatures and gets into trouble. As the spirit of compassion, he’s a bit backwards in Anti-Fairy society. Anti-Fairies are often kind towards each other because they’re a social species who gather in colonies, but Munn takes things too far by suggesting they make friends even with people who have wronged them, like the Fairies. Gross.

As I mentioned, his prankster nature tends to get him into trouble. He’s a spirit of scouting, stealth, and the arts of escape, and loves to learn people’s secrets. He’s not the blabbermouth that Winni is, though they have been known to team up on occasion to gather information (and do things like set up the Wind Wand on the blue moon in the Vegon system while embodying the Prince of Wind).

Munn may play the antagonistic role in much of Anti-Fairy myth, but he’s still a very nice guy. He just gets excited and puts silly plans into action that usually result in stealing someone’s sacred item and realizing as he runs off with it that yeah, he probably shouldn’t have done that. His brothers generally catch and scold him, and he gets punished for his offenses, but no one’s ever upset enough with him that they would go as far as destroying his Temple and then hunting him down and killing him. They’re still family, after all.

Still, Munn’s adventures aren’t limited to the zodiac spirits, and he appears in mythology as the guy who pulls crazy stunts such as taunting Death and opening the gates of the spirit world into the living realm. Munn is the guy who would stumble across an ancient scroll about how to resurrect the dead and then follow it because, “That would be hilarious if this actually worked”. But, being Munn, he’ll probably mix at least one of the ingredients up, and end up with more than he bargained for.

Sometimes he tries to solve problems on his own, though most of the time when he knows he’s in trouble, he’ll flee to Saturn for protection, to which Saturn’s deadpan response when his half-brother comes skidding in is, “What stupid thing did you do this time?” But, those two are very close. Most people don’t like to mess with Saturn, and will let Munn off with a warning. Most of Munn’s punishments involve Munn helping to clean up the mess he made and return anything he may have stolen, and grovel his apologies. Saturn lets them do that. He just doesn’t like people hurting his family and will step in if they’re punishments entail lots of violence, is all.

Munn is also the demigod of fast, safe, and enjoyable travel, and the guy you would want to make an offering to, perhaps along with a copy of your planned route, if you’re seeking his blessing before a journey. His field bonus is Speed. Anti-Wanda, you see, was a brilliant choice for the Anti-Fairy to sprint during the Fairy World Games. Munn’s speed bonus extends much more to flying than it does to the ground, but Anti-Wanda is still a fast little gal.

Temple: Far East (Pink) Region - Plane 7 - Comet Falls, Fairy World

The Sky Temple is hardly the place you think of first when you think “temple”. Munn cares less about being worshiped directly than he does making people happy and enjoying himself. His place tends to be a wild party all the time, and a lot of sketchy things go on here. Comet Falls is a party town as it is- it’s the place where they had the clock tower that we saw in “School’s Out: The Musical”, when all the godparents were thrilled about the change of the season for their godkids. Anti-Wanda has been able to navigate it without getting into too much trouble, though.

The echo chamber is in the upper, dome-shaped part of the building. The Sky Temple is not scheduled to make any appearances at this time, though I have a loose Prompt about Anti-Wanda planned that will probably end up there.

Bonds:

Yellow - Saturn is Energy, Munn is Acceptance. Together, as Lightning, they are the embodiment of fun and new discovery in a relationship, and their bond is viewed as one of pleasure, exploration, playfulness, excitement, and perhaps a bit of lust. Together they’re seen as spirits who represent the honeymoon phase of a relationship.

Blue -See Winni’s blue section

Pink -See Twis’ pink section

Purple - Sunnie is Focus. As Cloud, they embody everything between playful teasing and deadpan sarcasm. You basically get Sunnie with speed powers and punk piercings, never missing a beat as he roasts you. It’s worth noting that Anti-Wanda carries Munn’s favor and Anti-Cosmo carries Sunnie’s, so these two could take on their Prince of Cloud state every time their hosts decide to be intimate.

In case you haven’t figured it out by now, this is the joke from that one Inktober piece I drew about Foop saying he just got “the talk about where clouds come from” as he stares accusingly at his parents. It’s also a very funny joke about the giant cloud that accompanied Foop’s birth.

Green - See Thurmondo’s green section

TWIS: The Donkey, Farmer, and Merchant

Soil Years: 1993, 2000, 2007, 2014, 2021

Mastery: Soil, dedication, work, ambition, planning, harvest, physical strength

Parentage: Reality (Tarrow) x Some random gravity spirit Tarrow took an interest in, but whom Twis never really knew seeing as he was abandoned after

Preferred Favor: Thick brown belt with a citrine buckle

Modern Medium: None

Overview: Twis is the “solid as a rock” archetype in Anti-Fairy myth, stubborn and proud. He’ll usually be polite, if a bit gruff, unless you offend him, in which case he’ll probably leave and not come back. He holds long grudges, even if he doesn’t act on them quite as much as Saturn. For the most part, Sunnie is the only one who can sway his mind when he’s being an especially irritable grump.

He’s a dedicated worker who doesn’t cut corners and will get the job done and get it done well, but at his own pace. Don’t rush him. He hates to be rushed. He doesn’t like criticism, or people in general, and is reluctant to reveal himself to anyone of less authority than a High Count or High Countess born in the Soil year. With exception of relying on the sunlight and water to grow crops, he prefers to work alone and will be extremely frustrated if you try to help but you don’t measure up to his standards. He doesn’t see working with young kids as a way of teaching or bonding with them, and instead will send them off anywhere to get them out of his way. He takes pride in his work and doesn’t like it when his stuff is messed with.

Twis is the spirit of harvest too. He works in tandem with Sunnie to grow crops. He’s also a spirit of bartering, as Anti-Fairies believe that all land has life which is represented by a spirit bear. Twis, then, is the helpful spirit who carries messages to the spirit bears if someone is too embarrassed to pray to them directly. He’s the spirit who gives you strength to stand in front of a crowd, even if Winni is the spirit of communication and memory who helps you find your words and speak clearly.

Twis recognizes what people want and is always willing to put forth the effort to ensure all parties are happy. He’s the merchant spirit who is there when you strike up deals in the marketplace. He’s the careful planner who is there when you are struggling with funds and trying to stick to your budget. He’s a spirit of making deals and keeping loyal to your promises above all else. If you remember, H.P. was born in a Soil year. I think that’s fitting for the Head Pixie.

However, while Twis may be a spirit of work, budgets, and planning, he’s not so much a spirit of charity. He’s very much the ant in “The Ant and the Grasshopper”, a believer that you reap what you sow. He doesn’t enjoy straying from his plans or making sacrifices for someone he can’t prove has put forth their best effort. Of course, he doesn’t like watching these people work either, because he has things to do, nor does he like them working with him. It’s a complicated feeling. The guy just doesn’t like social interaction much, and only Sunnie seems really able to get through to him. Even that’s because Sunnie is helpful and practical, and emotionally distant.

You would think he would be a brony or something, having an affiliation with equines and all, but ain’t nobody got time for that when they live in a paradise with temperate climates year-round. There’s so much to plant and harvest! Also did I mention that he will completely work himself to exhaustion, because he will.

Temple: Lower East (Teal) Region - Plane 5 - Mudhale

The Soil Temple is built straight into a mountain, and it’s the entrance to many cave systems throughout Anti-Fairy World. It collapsed during the early years of the War of the Sunset Divide. H.P. was actually born in the year it collapsed, which is appropriately named the Year of the Fallen Mountain.

After the war, the Temple was restored to its former state. It’s in the same location and is more stable and less likely to collapse now. The echo chamber is deep in the back, among caverns of glowing mushrooms and interesting fauna. Twis doesn’t like visitors and wanted his chamber out of the way.

H.P. and Anti-Cosmo visit the Soil Temple in “Dust to Dirt”.

Bonds:

Yellow - Sunnie is Focus and Twis is Devotion. Together, as Mud, they are the embodiment of loyalty in a relationship, and their bond is viewed as one of tenderness, sweetness, warmth, and pure affection. Together they’re seen as spirits who represent companionate love (the post-honeymoon phase of a long-term relationship).

Blue - See Thurmondo’s blue section

Pink - Munn is Acceptance. As Sand, they embody peace and friendship.

Purple - See Winni’s purple section

Green - Saturn is Energy. As Ash, they embody instability and resistance. Saturn is a creature of passion, and Twis isn’t much for emotions. Saturn likes to rush, Twis likes to take things slow. Twis sees Saturn as sloppy, and Saturn sees Twis as slow. They wouldn’t kiff-tie willingly unless there was a huge emergency. They just don’t get along.

WINNI: The Leopard, Teacher, and Healer

Breath Years: 1994, 2001, 2008, 2015, 2022

Mastery: Breath, communication, health, teaching, sewing, rest, self-care

(Note: Anti-Fairies don’t believe in medicine, because it doesn’t work on them like it works on Fairies. They believe in either praying for miracles or in herbal remedies to soothe pain even if they don’t cure sickness. So instead of being the “spirit of medicine”, they consider Winni the spirit of “remedies”.)

Parentage: Reality (Tarrow) x Life (The Cycling Hen)

Preferred Favor: Beryl button or pin (Anti-Bryndin wears the button on his scarf, Foop / Hiccup would wear it on a vest or coat were they to take Winni’s favor)

Modern Medium: None (Anti-Bryndin hosts him in Knots)

Overview: Winni is the neat-freak homemaker of the family, who cleans his echo chamber obsessively. Between his nosiness, big mouth, his obsession with cleanliness, and living in a very frequented Temple, he’s the most likely to manifest himself, but you’ll probably get a tongue bath or preening in the process. For someone who so despises dirt, it’s a little surprising that he gets along much better with Twis than he does with Sunnie. Then again, it’s mostly Sunnie that finds Winni annoying rather than the other way around. Winni is still somewhat young for a spirit, and looks up to his elder half-brothers greatly.

Even so, Winni embodies the bossy mentor archetype. What he wants done, he wants done his way, and soon. He’s a bit of a jack-of-all trades, which means that many things come easily to him, which means he struggles to understand why other people can’t seem to measure up to his standards. Though he easily gets frustrated, he tries his best to shrug things off, put on a happy smile, and once again go over his instructions in careful detail. He doesn’t mind repeating himself, but he does get upset if you don’t want to listen to him.

As the spirit of medicine and herbal remedies, Winni obviously knows what he’s doing there. However, he has his set mindset about what helps what, and isn’t good at keeping up with the allergies of individuals, or even noticing if he’s just given them a deadly poison that wouldn’t kill a nature spirit. He means well.

Winni is basically the demigod of teamwork. Sunnie much prefers to work alone. Thus, the two of them are opposites, and because Anti-Cosmo plays on Sunnie’s team, Winni is a bit of an antagonist in Knots. Doesn’t help that he’s the spirit of Communication, and he’s a people-reader and a bit of a manipulator. He’s also horribly impatient, nosy as I mentioned, and a massive blabbermouth. In his free time, he enjoys all types of knitting, weaving, sewing, and embroidery. Most of the zodiac spirits prefer offerings of food, but Winni enjoys offerings of newspapers that keep him updated on the goings-on of the outside world, and he becomes super flattered if you make cross-stitches or sew plushies for him.

His inability to keep his mouth shut most of the time may have something to do with the fact that he screams every morning like a rooster, despite the fact that the rooster is Thurmondo’s sacred animal and Winni’s is the leopard. Maybe his mom and the little Leaves spirit rubbed off on him. The way I see it, Winni’s true form is actually heavily based off a rooster because of his mom, but because he spends so much time with Thurmondo, the rooster became associated with Thurmondo instead of him.

Temple: Lower West (Green) Region - Plane 3 - Godscress, Fairy World

The Breath Temple is also known by the name Temple of Healing. It’s a place of rest and strengthening, and rapidly speeds up the healing rate of all inside it- especially for magical creatures like the Fairykind. It contains a magical fountain, because in addition to being Populous trash, I am also confirmed Age of Mythology trash and I had to reference the Healing Spring.

Winni’s echo chamber is in the middle of the giant fountain. It’s like a volcano, but with healing water.

Bonds:

Yellow - See Thurmondo’s yellow section

Blue - Munn is Acceptance. As Wind, they embody politeness and structure.

Pink - Saturn is Energy. As Lava, they embody laughter and joy.

Purple - Twis is Devotion. As Roots, they embody oaths and fierce loyalty.

Green - Sunnie is Focus. As Blood, they embody sorrow and anxiety.

THURMONDO: The Rooster, Inventor, and Caretaker

Leaves Years: 1995, 2002, 2009, 2016, 2023

Parentage: Reality (Tarrow) x Death (The Grim Reaper)

Mastery: Leaves, curiosity, courage, initiative, understanding, mercy, humility

Preferred Favor: Jade circlet or tiara, usually of overlapping metal leaves

Modern Medium: Anti-Kyler (Rufus)

Overview: Thurmondo is absentminded, tending to get lost in his own thoughts as he thinks up new inventions, or wanders off after an interesting falling leaf. He’s the type who doesn’t mind being alone to work, though he does love people, and talking to them, as he finds them fascinating and loves to hear stories. He’s generally low-maintenance, though he’s nitpicky about special ceremonies and insulted when they aren’t done to his specifications.

Namely, Thurmondo knows his place as the youngest and submissive. He and those born in his zodiac are often followers rather than leaders. A stickler for tradition, Thurmondo becomes upset when, for example, someone born in his year attempts to lead someone of another zodiac through a ceremonial dance. Traditions like that. He’s paranoid about getting in the way and a bit superstitious that if doesn’t play his part, order and structure will collapse.

He has a shy nature, though if pushed far enough, he will make an effort to stand up for himself. Of course, the results of that effort depend on the reaction of whomever he’s standing up to. Thurmondo has a brave heart, but also a humble one, which can lead him to second-guess himself. This prevents him from rushing into battle like hot-headed Saturn, but the more Thurmondo starts to second-guess himself, the more nervous he becomes.

He used to be bolder in his younger years, but Winni’s really done a number on him; now, Thurmondo is viewed as more of an awkward and cowardly spirit than the clever inventor he once was. He still picks at his projects, but he doesn’t spend as much time on his research as he’d like to. His 24/7 relationship with Winni keeps his mind pretty busy. He’s easily distracted and can’t split his attention between separate tasks like Sunnie can.

Thurmondo may not be the one you would seek out for advice most of the time, but he would be the one you pray to when you don’t think you can go on any longer, especially when in unpleasant circumstances like abusive relationships (not even romantic ones necessarily). Thurmondo is the spirit of pulling through, the one who wants you to succeed and escape even if he can’t.

I wrote a potential Prompt about him and Winni, but because of the nature of abuse and coercion, I’m still deciding if I ever want to share it. If I do, it will be towards the end of the project, where only those with the determination to make it through the rest are likely to find it.

He’s basically given birth zillions of time and has oodles of children. The little guys never seem to last long, though. They often get… eaten.

Temple: High North (Blue) Region - Plane 4 - Near the FGP, Fairy World

The Leaves Temple is a quiet museum at its back, and the area at the front is full of puzzles, games, toys, and stuff to experiment and play with. Lots of fun for kids. the echo chamber is on the top floor.

Thurmondo’s Temple first appears in the distance during “Cotton Candy Oatmeal”, and is later visited in “Letters and Numbers”.

Bonds:

Yellow - Winni is Communication and Thurmondo is Curiosity. Thurmondo is also the spirit of change, especially the seasons. His spring form is one of innocence and discovery, of tentativeness and losing virginity. His summer form is one full of passion and delight. His autumn form is one of uncertainty, shame, passive-aggression, and reluctance. Finally, his winter form is one of fear and struggle, the relationship between him and Winni a drastic power imbalance of lust and abuse. Every winter, Thurmondo swears he’ll keep his memories and remember what Winni is like in winter and avoid falling back into his trap, but he loses his memories on March 14th every year, and with the new year, Winni patiently teaches him that he’s a nature spirit all over again.

Together, as Oxygen, they are the embodiment of uncertainty and hope in a relationship, and their bond is viewed as one of development, learning, realization, adaptation, and teamwork. It’s worth pointing out that from Winni’s perspective, the pair are literally creating oxygen when they’re together, so when Thurmondo resists him, Thurmondo is literally strangling people who need oxygen to breathe. Additionally, as a spirit with the ability to heal at an extremely rapid rate himself, Winni has some difficulty comprehending physical pain in others. Due to the oxygen thing, he’ll freak out when Thurmondo isn’t around, and is willing to use his powers of Communication for dirty manipulative tricks to make Thurmondo feel selfish and worthless when he wants to take a break.

Winni’s winter form has a better understanding that what he’s doing is wrong and might even feel guilty for it if you press him, though he’ll still shrug it off because he thinks he’s just doing his duty. In his autumn form, he is completely 100% convinced that he’s doing the right thing and that the people need them. In his spring form, like Thurmondo, he can also be viewed as a spirit of losing virginity, though he’s the “rite of passage” and “coming into adulthood” type of losing virginity as opposed to Thurmondo’s “wanting to give it to someone you love” or “the time just feels right”, because of course he is.

Together they’re seen as spirits who represent staying together out of necessity for the benefit of their children. Abusive relationships aren’t good from a human point of view, but for Anti-Fairies, who end up in relationships with those their counterparts do, it’s comforting to know that Thurmondo is sticking it out. When they remember the abuse Thurmondo takes from Winni every winter, suddenly the faults in their own partner don’t seem so bad.

Blue - Twis is Devotion. The weirdest thing is, Thurmondo’s field bonus is Copycat. Despite being the automatically submissive spirit, he actually can influence the mindset of those he kiff-ties with. As the Prince of Mulch, Twis’ Devotion combined with Thurmondo’s Curiosity would give you Twis’ body and personality, but instead of being devoted to farming, Twis would suddenly find himself super interested in Thurmondo’s inventions and research projects. Good luck dragging him away from those.

Pink - Sunnie is Focus. Again, Thurmondo has the power to influence the spirit in control, though whether he knows he’s doing it or not is up to debate. The Prince of Dew will lose Thurmondo’s spaciness, and is instead a brilliant mastermind who will rapidly learn anything and everything about whatever you give him to study.

Purple - Saturn is Energy. The Prince of Nitrogen is fast and furious, easily distracted, and prone to running off after anything that catches his attention and tackling it into submission. He’s super touchy-feely and will poke your face.

Green - Munn is Acceptance, but he’s also the spirit of compassion. Munn is a spirit of consent and joy, and when he and Thurmondo aren’t kiff-tied, he views his youngest half-brother in his hormonal summer form. However, when they are together, the Prince of Fungus gets slammed with all of Thurmondo’s burdens and self-doubts, and becomes overwhelmed with grief and shame. Munn doesn’t know how to deal with Thurmondo’s emotions, so the Prince of Fungus shuts down, withdrawing into himself and being mostly unresponsive, apart from the occasional snarky comment. He’s not too helpful and has a scathing outlook on the world at all times.

It’s super rare for Thurmondo to kiff-tie with other nature spirits, though, considering the hold Winni has on him. I can’t imagine any situation in my works when it would come up. Thurmondo’s fate is pretty set, and this post is simply here for you to think about the different possibilities that could result. But you shouldn’t really expect to see them in practice.

Here’s an overview zodiac kiff-tie chart. The background color of each box shows the color of the bond. The color of the text is the default dominant spirit.

There you go! That basically covers everything you could possibly need to know about the zodiac spirits! Whom you won’t be seeing until like Act 3, but okay, you do your thing and I’ll do mine.

#asks #Anon #ridwriting #FAIRIES!#Tiny Love prince #Fire lizard prince #Water genie prince #Sky monkey prince #Soil centaur prince #Breath moose prince #Chained Leaves prince #Frayed Knots #Bat cube and associates #The bat with the hat #The best bat queen #Nerdy blue bat son #Origin of the Pixies #Nature spirit ref #Long post

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