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saffronapplemanga · 2 years ago

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GANGSTA. - ギャングスタ - PART 2

CRIME, ACTION, DRAMA

(8 volumes, hiatus) Mangaka Kohske-sensei is sick and works on updates when she can. There are chapters beyond volume 8 in JP that haven't been collected into a volume yet here.

Available in English here

Anime - Yes. I'll admit it's crunchy, poorly paced, and disappointing because the studio went under literally a few days after it finished airing and it shows, but it’s still fun? They did cut stuff from the manga and there's so much they didn't adapt, so I'd recommend reading it. I'm begging for a remake and a season 2 or something...

Links to my other manga posts here

~Part one of this post is here~

This is a continuation of my part one post, so go check that out if you haven't and come back here!

Let’s continue talking non-stop about my precious found family trio ❤️

***Trigger warnings for everything you can think of for this series.***

Part one was broken up into: Why You Should Check GANGSTA. Out - What's It About? - Lots And Lots of Character Analysis (And Gushing) - Where It All Began - Nicolas and Nina - "Nice vs. Kind" - Worick and Alex

This part two post will continue the character analysis and is broken up into: Nicolas and Alex - Nicolas and Worick - Nicolas - The Trio and The Scene That Had Me Bawling My Eyes Out - Brief Shoutouts to Characters I Also Want to Talk About, But This Post Is Already Long Enough

***SPOILERS UNTIL CHAPTER 56 FROM HERE ON OUT***

(Note: the manga pages/panels I included for reference are arranged from right to left reading order btw)

Nicolas and Alex

I touched on Nic and Alex's relationship a bit earlier, but let's dig deeper. We established that Nic is having trouble opening up to Alex, and she's having trouble figuring him out. Gradually though, they start to click.

I've already said that one of the ways Nic shows affection is by teasing. Early on in chapter six when the boys are rushing out the door mid-meal, Nic stops halfway out the door, turns around, and signs something to Alex. And if I'm not mistaken, it's the first time he's initiated talking to her. Alex looks up the sign in the book and realizes he said the food was, "So-so." Even though earlier in the same chapter he felt unapproachable and ate alone down in his space, he's making an effort to communicate and thank her for the food... in his own awkward Nicolas-way lol.

At Constance's shop after Alex's withdrawal meltdown with Worick, we can see Nic keeping an eye on Alex from afar. She starts recalling some memories and is on the edge of having a panic attack. At this moment, Nic comes inside the shop to ask Constance for more paint:

Be still, my beating heart.

I think he asked for the paint as an excuse to casually come closer to Alex. Whether he actually needed more paint or not, he chose this moment to get up from where he was and come inside. After he calms Alex and helps her open the pill bottle, he leaves once she stops trembling, likely to give her some air and not have her feel like he's hovering over her — so that she doesn't feel like she's burdening or worrying them. Since Nic and I have similar love languages/displays of affection, I tend to do the same. I don't like to make a big fuss over something so the other person doesn't feel embarrassed and like they have the spotlight on them. At the same time, I try to make sure they know I'm always around and can come to me when they need to/are ready to.

Next, we have these pages where Alex was helping with a job looking for a lost cat to "earn her keep" when she sees a Twilight child being beaten and about to be SA-ed by Normals. She steps in and whacks one of them to allow the child to escape, but she's up against three big guys and gets caught. Luckily, Nic comes in the nick of time hehe:

I can't believe they cut this out of the anime... Nic is a cat whisperer but Alex is not a Nic whisperer... yet, LOL. She'll get there. And him constantly pickpocketing the people he knocks out is so funny. But also it’s sad because it’s a habit he picked up as a kid to survive.

I know I sound like a broken record, but I love the casual kindness in this series. Nic saves Alex and the child, and gives her the cat and the money he pickpocketed from the men. Then he gave some to the child and walked away. The way he did all this sort of reminded me of this saying that’s found in the Abrahamic religions that goes, "Give without letting your left hand know what your right hand is doing." Except Nic is a leftie lol. This saying is about not seeking a reward for doing something good. To not “announce” your good deeds for attention. Nic does what he does, doesn't make a big deal of it, and just goes about his business (it's "nice vs. kind" again!). Alex stands against injustice even when it put her in great danger. In this case, she put herself in danger for a Twilight she didn't even know, and I'm sure Nic appreciates that.

Even though Alex is struggling to get on Nic's wavelength, it doesn't stop her from trying. She takes the initiative to learn sign language when she's alone. Before heading home from the clinic together, Alex stops Nic to convey her feelings about her situation, but in sign. It's her first attempt at signing a full conversation. Nic waits for her to finish without interrupting her, but then says, "Idiot. Your signing sucks. I can't understand it. Try again. And quit being so rough with that book. It's the only copy we have." To me, it sounds like Nic knew that Alex was studying sign, and he appreciates her effort and is teasing like he always does. They're starting to meet each other halfway more and more.

When Alex regains her memories and passes out from a panic attack, we get this scene:

This is an example of what I meant by, "I try to make sure they know I'm always around and can come to me when they need to/are ready to." He's just there, quietly watching over her when she's in a vulnerable state. He chose to read his book in Worick's room next to her instead of the living room or his room. It's such a simple gesture — a reassuring presence at a time when she's working through her trauma, waiting by her side with a comforting drink in hand.

A scene I adored was this:

Kohske-sensei, once again killing it with conveying things through wordless pages.

After comforting a grieving Nina, Nic takes her to Bastard to watch Alex sing. He leans against the speakers so he can feel the vibrations of her performance in an effort to connect to Alex since he can't hear her singing. If this isn't the cutest thing... idk what is...

Also, this:

A little bit after leaving Bastard, Nic's 'roided out on Theo's drug and is about to do some reckless shit. He's leaping over the rooftops to his destination and we get this page of him drifting in the air... humming the tune of Alex's song... AHHHH!!!

Nicolas and Worick

I talked about the Handymen and their relationships with other characters, but what about with each other? As early as the first page of chapter two, we already get hints that Nic and Worick have a... complicated relationship.

From their banter and how they bounce off each other, we can tell these two are beyond close. But the more we progress, the more we see how close. Worick usually presents a silly, charming, and laid-back attitude, so it's jarring when we see him seriously snap at the girl badmouthing Nic at the brothel. It's kind of scary to see him like that. Time and time again, we see how protective he is of Nic. When one of his clients suggests that Nic should "join them" Worick declines and is angry on the inside. He thinks to himself that Nic isn't a sex worker. While Nic couldn't join Worick in working at the brothel, Pussy, because no Twilights are allowed, I get the feeling Worick wouldn’t have let him anyway. He's traumatized by his sex work and seems to keep Nic out of it. Hell, he owns Nic and he could have made him sell himself, but my impression is that he's against it. Maybe I'm reaching, idk.

With their backstory, we learn a lot about them, how they met, why they are the way they are, and more. I love that Worick took Nic in and gave him the education he never had. They bond as children and become friends, but we can see SO MANY times, Nic bows to Worick. I've lost count of how many times he does it. I think this is because his whole life, Nic has been taught to obey his "master" which was usually his father, and now, Worick. Now, these two hurt little boys are brought together, and they need one another to survive.

Worick asks, "Why don't you run away?" and, "How can you act so calm?" There are various reasons Nic hasn't run away and acts calm, so allow me:

Worick doesn't know yet at this point, but Nic's father, Gaston Brown, has his supply of Cerebret. Nic can't source it himself and would die without it if he ran away.

He's a child. Where would he even go? He has nowhere to go.

He's acting "calm" because, to him, this is his "normal". It's not unusual for victims of abuse to not register things they experienced as abuse. If that's the only perspective they've known and have been conditioned to, it becomes their "normal". Or some believe they "deserve" that treatment. Worick's "normal" also consists of constant abuse, but he at least has a contrasting point of reference in his brother who gets treated much better than he does. Nic doesn't have that.

No matter how terrible, Gaston Brown is his father at the end of the day. It can be ridiculously hard to cut parents out, even when you hate them. This applies to Worick as well, but I'm going to expand on this point more in a bit.

I'm sure Worick was asking these questions out of frustration, perhaps asking himself those questions rather than actually directing them at Nic who he knows isn't listening.

The two are suffering abuse at the hands of their fathers, but the abuse isn't just physical. Although, that's the most obvious form that they are both experiencing at the same time:

It's common for victims of physical abuse to say, "I fell," or say they had an accident when asked about their injuries. Worick is the first to bring up the topic in chapter 13 (right page) as he's been observing Nic and his behaviors more and more. Nic pauses before coming up with a lie, saying that he, "...fell down". I wouldn't be surprised if he was told to either hide that his father was abusing him or maybe he thinks it was his fault and takes the blame for his injuries. Worick understands what he actually means though. It's glaringly obvious that Nic's arm has been stomped on by someone wearing military boots. Then in chapter 15 (left page) after Nic comes back from a battle, he asks what happened to Worick. And Worick mirrors Nic's response of, "I fell." I think Nic knows about Worick being beaten by this point, and his asking was more like, I'm the one that just came back from war. What the heck happened to you? Are you okay? Or something along those lines.

After this, the boys really start to get along, even more than before. They enjoy each other's company and feel comfortable with one another. They understand each other in a way no one else around them does. But then, Worick learns that Nic is a Twilight, and he's been taught that Twilights are monsters. At first, he's in denial when he finds out but ultimately challenges his teachings. He's spent time and shared intimate moments with this so-called "monster" and quickly works towards saving Nic from his father. So, he buys Nic's contract and a supply of Cerebret.

This scene... stomped on my heart. After being injured in a battle he, A 12 YEAR OLD CHILD, was forced to fight in, Nic wakes up, leaving the bed and assuming his spot on the floor — like he's been "trained" to do (more on this in the next section... ugh.) He rips out his IV and runs out in the rain calling after his father, clinging to the bars of the fence... only to be thrown away for money and called a monster. His expression on the last page killed me. That's the face of a child who still hoped for their parent to show them love, even after everything they had done to them. Yes, Worick has saved him from his father's tyranny, but part of him still hoped...

The next day, Worick has been beaten once again. Nic has been "freed" but not actually. As Worick says, "Great, nothing's changed at all." (This is a theme that comes up constantly.) Nic is still a child soldier who's a slave and Worick is still his father's punching bag. Nic's response? He signs, "Should I kill him?" referring to Worick's father, as it is now time to free Worick from his abusive situation. It's also the only thing he knows how to do. Nic snaps the next time Worick's father beats him, killing the whole family. Worick is in a panic, "Father, it wasn't me! Please believe me, Father..." and he seems angry at Nic. When he tells him, "I won't allow you to die that easy! You're going to hurt real bad before you die! The worst kind of pain you can imagine! That's an order!" he's taking out his frustration on Nic while also begging him to not die and leave him behind. Nic is Worick's only friend after all. The expression on Nic's face when he gets yelled at is interesting. At first his eyes are open wide, then he relaxes his face accepting what Worick says. It reminds me of his face when his father left. It's worth pointing out that Nic's previous master was a white/blonde man with an eyepatch who was bigger than him and was rough with him. And now his new master is too.

I think... Worick is ultimately glad his father is gone, but he's conflicted. The thing with some relationships, especially family/parent-child relationships, is that it's never that simple. No matter how terrible, a child will always crave the love of their parent. Somewhere inside, they hope that a crumb of affection will come their way. Often times in abusive relationships, it isn't always all bad. The abusive parent can still have moments where they are good to the child victim and show care and gentleness. The child is powerless to run away, powerless to fight back, and naturally seeks the love of the parent, so they don't have much choice other than to endure and hope for "good times" to make their appearance.

While I was writing this, I was skimming through the manga again to refresh my memory and I saw this page at the end of vol.3 that I either missed or completely forgot about that supports what I'm saying:

Apparently, Worick's picture is only in the Japanese volumes.

Gaston Brown is... hugging Nic. I think... this is the only time we see Nic smile as a child. And he did put the last name "Brown" on Nic's tag. Did he see him as his son, even a little? I want to mention that the flashback is all from Worick's POV, and we never directly see Gaston physically abuse Nic. Worick's POV could be skewing our perception of Nic's story and he might be projecting his experience with abuse onto Nic, assuming it was Gaston when it could've been the other men. I could argue points in Gatson's defense, believe it or not. Like how he actually told the guys to lay off of Nic, or maybe he sold him to Worick because they could take care of him better than he could, and so on and so forth. Still a piece of shit and not father-of-the-year or anything, and this could totally not be the case. It's something to think about but I'll leave it there for now.

The same is true for Worick. He's had nice moments with his father as well. But now, there is no chance Worick can ever hope to have a relationship with his father. While no longer being terrorized, the boys lost all hope for parental affection as well as any kind of familial support system. It's normal to feel great loss and regret. It reminds me of Ash's relationship with his father from Banana Fish, and that One Piece character who had a dedicated arc semi-recently (I don't wanna spoil anyone, but if you know, you know). Like Ash and in One Piece, Nic and Worick were failed by their parents and pushed to desperate measures to survive. But ultimately, all these characters can't bring themselves to completely hate their parents and feel nothing for them. It's harder than it seems to throw your family away even when you hate them. Whenever people are like, "Just cut your parents off! They're not the boss of you!" it's like... shut up, it's complicated.

Surely now, things will be on the up and up now that they're out of those terrible situations, right?

Wrong.

Worick is selling himself to support them, and Nic is frankly a burden. His medication is expensive, he can't work regular jobs, and all he knows how to do is fight and kill. Worick is excited to take Nic somewhere where they can get something decent to eat, and to eat together at a place that allows Twilights. But he rounds the corner and sees that his friend is beaten and bruised. And Nic says it himself, "All of it is pointless." (Again, this is a constant theme.) They're constantly stuck in a crappy situation. They're NOT free even after running away. They're still two scared little kids with no support system, fending for themselves just like before. And Twilights will always be oppressed. They'll always be slaves. The whole Three Laws is a facade to "free" the Twilights when in reality that's not the case. It's probably why Chad says he doesn't like the Three Laws and not to talk about them around him. Even if Worick didn't own him, Nic and the other Twilights would be slaves to the system.

In the current timeline, the boys are doing pretty well for themselves. Their business/home, their neutral status, and freelancer flexibility are PEAK luxuries. If you look at their current lifestyle and think, "Man, they live in a shitty place and their jobs kinda suck," then I say to you, that you haven't tasted poverty and desperation. I always get pissy when I see those, "I tried living on poverty wages for a month!" things because... fuck you. One of the worst parts about poverty is that there's no end in sight. You can slave away day in and day out and not get anywhere. There's no promise of "moving up" if you just work hard enough. But if you KNOW it's over in a month or even a year or more? You can pace yourself and stick it out. That's nothing. That's EASY. At least there's an end in sight. But even if you get out, you always live in fear of slipping and going back. Anyone who thinks poverty is caused by people being lazy or whatever is just exposing how ignorant they are. Poverty is a failure of society — all of us as a society are failing the poor and oppressed. Poverty is a form of violence, and not a failure of the individual. I don't want to harp on about this for too long, but just know, I'm proud of the boys and I love their crappy little home and wish them luck on their morally dubious jobs.

But, these two are codependent on each other while also having some awkward power dynamics. Nic needs Worick to be his contract holder to afford him as much "freedom" as he has, and to keep others from using him. Early on, he relied on Worick to provide for them. Worick needs Nic to keep him safe, and I'd argue that Worick would've been taken out for his "storage" ability being a liability ages ago if it wasn't for Nic's presence being a threat. Beyond bodily survival, they need one another in terms of emotional well-being and keeping each other in check. They're aware of their "master/Twilight" positions and for the most part, do well to thrive together despite it. It does come up though and continues to be a point of contention in their relationship.

Back to the Arcangelo family massacre, maybe part of Worick was angry at himself for not being able to do anything and Nic having to dirty his hands. Plus the way Nic killed everyone was... gruesome. It proved to Worick what Nic was capable of and that he really is a Twilight, a monster, and all of this shocked him. The boys were friends, but after the massacre, part of Worick likely hated Nic and he was cruel to him in some ways (as we see more of in the Blu-ray manga where Worick even calls Nic his dog. He was playing along with Monroe, but still...) There's definitely resentment. You could say Nic ruined his life as much as he saved him.

However, two years later (I'm assuming after the attack on Monroe), we get a scene of Worick crying to Chad as Nic is hospitalized, and I believe he starts to realize once again that Nic is just a kid and not an invincible monster. He realizes that throwing Nic into that situation with his planned attack on Monroe almost got his only friend killed for real (which might be why Monroe later says that Nic attacked him for his master's sake, that bothers Worick because he now sees them as friends). At this point, their relationship takes another turn.

The reality is that he's still technically Nic's master, but they're friends too. So now they went from friends, to master/slave, and now to master/friends. It's an awkward line to walk, and Worick is trying his best to keep it more on the friendship side. Like, when he tells Nic not to make him give orders because he doesn't like flexing his role as master. No matter what, the legal ownership of Nic is always hovering over them. It's... complicated... good lord.

I do find it interesting to think about how Worick is probably the first person who treated Nic normally at first because he didn't know he was a Twilight. Nic probably never experienced that any other time.

One last thing — I love that they got matching tattoos because it was to cover the serial numbers on Nic's back and Worick got one too. I think it was Worick's idea because Nic doesn't seem like the type that would bother. Cute...

I know I mainly talked about their past together and there's so much subtle stuff from the present like their conversation at Connie's place and Worick hitting Nic with the hammer to test his sense of pain. But maybe another time or else we're gonna be here all day. I could literally analyze this series page by page, panel by panel.

Nicolas

Now, I'd like to further break down aspects of Nic's character I have yet to cover in this section dedicated to him because he's my baby girl.

Worick's family had it coming. If only Nic took out his own dad while he was at it.

I am not deaf, nor will I pretend to truly understand what it's like for those in the deaf/hard-of-hearing community. I can only give my perspective on the portrayal of Nicolas as someone trying to relate and understand from my limited knowledge, my own experience with disability, and through my experience with a deaf relative of mine. So please keep that in mind whenever I address that aspect of Nic. If I got something wrong, please let me know! I’m always open to learning more.

Nic expresses himself differently than Worick, from his mannerisms, how he shows kindness, etc. Why is he the way he is? I've seen some people say that he doesn't show a lot of emotion. While I do think he was emotionally stunted from childhood, he actually displays a lot of emotion. He's just more subtle about it, except for when he wants to fight I guess.

From the start, he gives off a feral kind of energy. Nic has an itch for battle, yes, but it also shows in his body language in his daily life and how he acts outside of battle.

I know I call him an animal here, but I say it affectionately, I swear. I want to throw hands with his dad who treated him like a literal animal (ง’̀-‘́)ง But we'll get to that... They cut this detail out of the anime too!

A panel that stood out to me early on is this:

Nic often curls up on furniture, like when he sat next to Nina on the couch. But here when he's alone, he's hunched over his food, not even properly sitting on the loveseat. He sits downstairs alone to eat instead of joining Worick and Alex. Worick mentions that, "I've known him since we were kids, but we've only been eating together for the past two or three years." Later at the end of one of the volumes, we get a layout of the Handymen's home and it turns out Nic doesn't have a bed. His "room" is the open space by the kitchen and his "bed" is either the loveseat or he just sleeps on the floor. It's like... he doesn't know how to sit "normally" or behave in a "typical" manner sometimes.

Listen, I sleep on the floor with a Japanese-style futon and I'm that kid that has to sit cross-legged on everything — couches, desk chairs, those insufferably uncomfortable science class/art studio stools, you name it. But Nic's body language was telling me that he's been hurt and abused before I even got any info on his backstory.

Sure enough, his backstory proved me right.

We talked about the physical abuse Nic and Worick went through, but there's more to it than just that. Worick is also being emotionally abused by being othered and hated for being the result of his father's infidelity. Nic is being abused on so many levels — he hasn't been given any kind of education (abuse!), his medication is being kept from him and he's only given enough to barely function (medical child abuse), his mother was killed by his father and he was taken to be a child soldier (yikes...), and he's being treated like a literal dog! OH MY GOD!!!

His feet don't even reach the floor... How could you be so cruel to this child...

Multiple times, we see that Nic goes out of his way to come down off of furniture and curl up on the floor as if he was a dog that got scolded, and to take up as little room as possible. Worick realizes that Gatson Brown probably "trained" Nic to do this, so he tells him he doesn't have to do that around him. He can just sit on the chair. Nic nods in response but he keeps getting down and sitting on the floor again and again. It's like it's been hardwired and beat into him — engrained into him, and he's having a hard time breaking the habit.

When Nic wakes up after passing out, he looks startled. Normally, I'd think that he's reacting to Worick finding out that he's a Twilight, but Nic can't hear them and likely can't read their lips from where he is. Maybe he could tell from their body language? But to me, this feels like he woke up and thought, Why am I in a bed? Oh no, I should get out of this bed before anyone sees me. I'll get in trouble. I'm doing a lot of assuming here, but that's my impression because the first thing he does is jump out of bed and curl up on the floor next to the IV stand. He flips through the book and lingers on the signs for "Family/Father". Then he gets up, rips the IV out, and runs outside to chase after his father. That's when we get the heart-wrenching scene where he's abandoned that we discussed in the previous section.

The abuse that takes form in Nic's lack of education and accommodations for his disability is something that got me REAL heated. Like, yeah, the child soldier thing is horrible but I don't think I need to expand on why... I touched on education in my Tenmaku no Jadoogar: A Witch's Life in Mongol post, but in summary, education is a human right! Access to language is a human right! A deaf child not having access to language is child abuse! Whether it's spoken or sign language, they need to be able to convey their wants and needs and communicate with those around them. Humans are social beings! I've seen firsthand a mere glimpse of what a deaf child who hasn't been given proper access to language goes through, and I raised hell over it! I won't get into details out of respect for their privacy. I can only imagine how lonely and isolated Nic must have been his whole life. His deafness and language deprivation can also be symbolic of Twilights not having a voice in society.

And I want to be clear that I'm not saying deaf or hard-of-hearing individuals need hearing aids or cochlear implants or anything like that (Nic probably couldn't get some anyways, but that's not the point). Deafness isn't something that needs to be "fixed" because there's no such thing. Whether one wants to utilize medical devices, wants to learn spoken language/speech therapy, wants to learn sign language, and how they want to use them in whatever combination is a deeply personal choice. These are all tools and some people in the deaf and hard-of-hearing community chose not to use medical devices of any kind. Some, like Nic, prefer sign language over speaking. They should be presented with their options and be able to choose what suits their needs best.

Why is he always itching for a fight? My opinion? It’s all he knew for so long and he's depressed and needs to feel something. The whole thing about the Cerebret making him numb and lose feeling reminds me of the numbness you feel when depressed so that could be symbolism or something? Also... I think Nic might be kinda suicidal... Like in a trying-to-get-himself-killed and having self-destructive tendencies kinda way if that makes sense. He's accepted his fate of dying young, of always being seen as a monster.

Seeing Nic say something so profoundly sad, echoing himself as a child, while simultaneously having people around who love him do everything they can to help is just… heartbreaking. He feels hopeless. This goes back to what I said in the previous section about how Nic knows he and the Twilights will never be free no matter what.

Despite this, he's still SO KIND!!! A scene that turned on the waterworks for me is this:

He's having seizures and is in extreme pain. Theo is about to call the test off but Nic stops him. He knocks the downer out of Theo's hand since using it would ruin the test results. Then, he grits his teeth and smiles, points to Yang indicating to Theo, I'm fine. Go help him. Now that he's accepted his death that's coming sooner rather than later, he's offering his body to help Theo figure out how to help other Twilights...

Nic is a perfect representation of what Twilights face in this world. From being born to be a weapon, being oppressed and abused, having no voice, and even the manga not having much of his perspective. The past was Worick's POV and the present is a lof of Alex's POV. Nic's POV is pretty much just his memories of Veronica. We don't get to hear from him about what he thinks very often, and most of the time we have to infer a lot of things. He fascinates me and I want to learn more about him!!!

The Trio and The Scenes From Ch 43 and 56 That Had Me Bawling My Eyes Out

Note: I read the post-vol. 8 chapters in Japanese. I'll be using my own translations for the post-vol. 8 chapters I'm referencing.

We get various moments throughout the series of the trio interacting. Most of the notable moments have been one on one — either Nic/Worick, Nic/Alex, or Alex/Worick. The scenes I want to talk about here are ones where things start to… converge (?) in a way. Like, things regarding the three of them coming together? I’m not quite sure how to put it. Hopefully, as I talk about the scenes, things will start to make sense.

Chapter 43 was relentless, from beginning to end. We check in with where the trio are mentally/emotionally. While separated from one another in this chapter, they’re all… really going through it at this point, to put it mildly.

First up is Worick, who has just made some WILD moves in the story. Like, holy shit, Worick!!! I trust you sweetie, but what’s going on in that big beautiful head of yours? I was anxious when he found out about Monroe's betrayal and he made a face I'm used to seeing on Nic, but not Worick himself — an unhinged grin that says, Oh, I'm about to fuck shit up. And I was nervously laughing like... haha, what're you gonna do Worick...? Oh no... I have a bad feeling about this. AND THEN HE ROLLED UP WITH MILES' HEAD IN A BAG! And wants to see Uranos Corsica! WORICK!!?! He's doing a convincing job of making everyone think that he's siding with Corsica, the notorious Twilight-hater.

While I have to say, Worick is scaring me a bit, I don't doubt him at all. He's constantly shown what a wonderful person he is. He's gone above and beyond to protect Nic and doesn't let people speak ill of his partner. And it's precisely in the midst of Worick taking frightening, extreme measures that we get this scene:

Sometimes, murder is moral, kids. But his face... the way he hesitated to hug her back...

It opens with a flashback of Worick in his teens having just stabbed a man who was cruel to Twilights and he's taking it upon himself to stand up for them. We've been shown that Worick hates the discrimination against Twilights despite having been taught to hate and fear them before he met Nicolas. And now, I'm genuinely worried for him because he could very much get himself killed. Nic's not with him. No one is. He's doing this alone. Big Mama is on his side, but she still works under Corsica.

Speaking of Nic, I don't think Worick filled him in on whatever the plan is. Nic was passed out after having a seizure when Worick decided to raise hell against Monroe. He's the next in the trio we check in with. But right before we do, we see Chad on the phone with Gina where he's forced to acknowledge that he's helpless to do anything for the suffering Twilights. He remembers what Nicolas said as a child — "All of it is pointless." I'm not crying.

Back at the clinic, Nic is still out of commission from the experimental drug's side effects. He's remembering the night he killed Worick's family and Worick yelling at him. Nina puts her hands on his shaking ones, trying to soothe him:

Just fuck me up... Don't make that face... Theo, I’m gonna need you to come in clutch and figure something out. Can we get this man a juicy research budget or something…?😩💦

Nic, once again, looks so hopeless. So defeated. He's accepted his fate. He still wants to help the other Twilights. *Punches the wall* DAMNIT STOP HURTING MY BOY LIKE THIS!

Theo says Nic's contract has been "voided" and Nic says, "My master is going to a place where he doesn't need a Twilight anymore" while looking distraught in my opinion. That line makes it sound like he may have some idea of what Worick is doing. Or a more depressing interpretation is that he thinks he's useless and has been tossed aside, but I refuse to entertain that idea. And then he says he still has an order to follow. I think this is in reference to what Worick told him that night Nic killed his family — "I won't allow you to die that easy! You're going to hurt real bad before you die! The worst kind of pain you can imagine! That's an order!" Like, You're not allowed to die on me. I also think the order might be to keep Alex safe and get her out of the city (which is why he’s looking at the blood under his nails where he accidentally scratched her). And I want to point out that even though his contract is voided, Nic from this point on keeps constantly calling Worick his master. Maybe it's a sense of loyalty, or because he doesn't want Worick to leave him behind. I honestly can't say for sure, but it hurts me... I'm holding my head in my hands right now... ugh...

Finally, we have Alex closing the chapter. She comes back to Handymen HQ with the intention of it being the last time — "Barry, you were right. I was crazy to think I'd found a place where I belonged. I've never had a home I could come back to. And I'm sure this time, I'll never come back here again." I'm NOT crying. But then, she finds a beheaded body the moment she walks through the door.

I gotta say, I laughed a little here because the first thing Alex does after realizing what she’s looking at is to lock the door and close the window shutters. Her first instinct is to try and make sure nobody finds out that one of the boys BEHEADED A MAN in their living room. I mean, yeah she was freaked out by the body, but more so than that, she didn’t want the boys to get in trouble for murder!!! Whether she thinks they did it or not is unclear, but even if they did, it doesn’t matter to her! She trusts them 100%!!! She did meet them murdering Barry and all, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Alex, you boobalicious babe, you’re such a real one!!!!! She might make a great getaway driver, tbh.

Anyways, back to the scenes ruining my life:

By this point in the chapter, I’m just sitting in front of a tissue box with a pile of used tissues in my lap… I’m reading through tears. I can’t see shit.😭😭😭

Right after she tries to cover the boys’ asses for homicide, her train of thought goes down memory lane. Her eyes wander around the room, recalling her life since Barry, and the men who saved her from the streets of Ergastulum, asking for nothing in return. We see a note from Worick and an envelope of money he left for Alex, bloody hand prints everywhere. Even in the midst of him BEHEADING A MAN IN THE LIVING ROOM, making some extremely risky moves, and heading into the lion’s den, he still thought of Alex — not wanting her to get wrapped up in their mess and the turmoil that's enveloping the city. I am bouncing off the walls, crying, screaming… I love them....... The care and love they all have for each other is... *sobbing*

-----------------------

Before moving onto the scene from chapter 56 that I've literally made my desktop background, I wanted to dig a little further into whatever Worick is planning, so I'm going to jump to chapters 50-51.

I said that I don't think Worick filled Nic in on the plan, so I was wondering how Nic felt about what his partner was up to. We get a scene where he looks shocked when he's told, "Your contract holder, Storage (Worick), has committed taboo." And I'M over here like, Nic, are we freaking out? Are we chill? What’s the vibe buddy? I can’t tell if we’re in trouble or not...

But then:

He smiled. Okay, so Nic seems okay with this. Now I can breathe a little.

The flashback scenes of the boys when they were working for Monroe show that they had a good relationship with Miles. It looks like they genuinely cared for each other. Miles even says that if his son was still alive, it would be nice if he was like Worick. So while I still have faith that Worick knows what he's doing, and after being reassured by Nic's smile, I must say the flashback portion did add salt to the wound. At first, when Worick shows up with the head, I started to think if there was any possibility that he didn't actually kill Miles and that it was a trick or something. Later, however, at the end of chapter 43, we check in with Alex and see the beheaded body at the Handymen's home. Unless there's some kind of twist, I guess he really did kill him and that makes me sad after seeing these flashback pages. Now I'm wondering how Worick feels about everything. He's clearly under a lot of pressure. I'd like to see more from him in future chapters about all this.

-----------------------

And now, the scenes that've been living rent-free in my head...

Captured by the Paulklee Guild, Nic and Alex have some tender af moments. In chapter 53, Alex wakes up and immediately starts asking about Nic's injuries and apologizes for not being able to do anything. He cuts her off by placing the back of his hand over her mouth and responds with this:

Nic: "You missed your chance to hightail it out of here again, slowpoke."

Alex: "...Yeah... I guess I did."

I LOVE THEM!!!🥺❤️

This is the most... what do you even call it? Tender? Loving? Casually comfortable? Whatever it is, they are totally clicking now!!! And it continues in this scene that had me kicking my feet and crying buckets in chapter 56:

Alex: "He's even got scars behind his ears..."

Nic: "...WhAT?"

Alex: "I always thought you were completely different from him."

Nic: "WhAT abOUt NOw?"

Alex: "You suck."

Nic: "Heh."

"No need for you to answer the phone anymore. So what do you wanna do now? You can go back to being a prostitute, or keep chasing after my master. If you wanna keep playing diva, that's fine too. If you wanna break out of here, I'll make it happen."

Alex: "Hm..."

Nic: "ChoOSe wHAteVer yOu WAnt, bECaUse yoU'Re diffERenT fRoM Us."

Alex: "...Yeah."

When she reaches for him, Nic's reflex is to grab Alex's hand when he feels something approaching from behind. Then he notices her hand is injured from when he hurt her during his seizure. There are panels of him before this looking at blood under his nails, probably from digging them into Alex's hand. He lets go and signs, "Sorry." I want to point out, there's NO text box for this sign. I don't know any Japanese sign language other than "thank you" because this manga taught me that one. That's a lie, I also know "kill" which is sure to come in handy. But it's incredible how I know that he signed "sorry" without knowing the sign for it. They didn't put a text box for that sign and they didn't need to! So good. Peak. This is peak fiction I say unironically. They joke and banter while in a grim situation, and it's tooth-rottingly sweet.

Nic, who’s usually on guard, is completely relaxed now. He lets Alex caress him. Worick, who usually has a calm and cool facade on, is tense after his nightmare, unable to keep his usual mask up. He too, lets Alex caress him, and we get mirrored pages of Nic in the current moment and Worick from chapter 16. They trust her and Alex is trusting them after suffering abuse at the hands of others, growing closer to them. All three of them allow themselves to have some vulnerability with one another after living such harsh lives, constantly clawing to survive.

Then, Nic tells Alex to do whatever her heart desires. Whatever she wants, he'll make it happen. She's "different" and doesn't have to be stuck in this crappy cycle like them. But she looks a bit upset when he says this. Like she's mad he thinks they're doomed to live a hopeless existence and to suggest she abandon them for her own sake. I'm hoping that now Alex is mostly recovered from her withdrawals, we'll get to see more of her kindness with the boys and helping them in their time of need like they did for her.

They're so soft.........

I personally don’t perceive any of the intimate scenes we get throughout the manga as romantic. I don’t think there’s going to be a love triangle or that Alex is going to get paired up with one of the Handymen. Especially with the mirrored pages of Nic and Worick from Alex’s point of view in chapter 56 shows she loves them the same. I can understand why people would see these scenes as romantic, because honestly, they’re more “romantic” and emotional than a lot of romances out there. While talking to my friend, I jokingly referred to this as “platonic romance/romanticized friendship” where you love your homies and family so much and feel you’re able to bare your soul to them. I’m aware that Kohske-sensei has drawn old art of Nic and Alex as a couple, but that isn’t canon so I’m not counting it. You can ship your characters and not make them a couple in canon lol. But if she does go that route, I trust her to do it well.

Brief Shoutouts to Characters I Also Want to Talk About, But This Post Is Already Long Enough

Nina

I already talked about Nina in part one so I won’t say much more. But what’s up with her? Does she have some One Piece Haki powers or something??? Is there something you’d like to share with the class, Nina?

Theo

I’d like to think that Theo isn’t being as reckless with the experimental drug as it seems. We’ve seen that Theo is much kinder than he lets on. He obviously loves Nina (whenever he wraps his lab coat around her, it's so damn cute!!!) and he’s made it his mission to help the oppressed Twilights, even going as far as to make his own generic Cerebret which puts a target on his back. So yeah, Theo is great and I’m hoping he figures out a way to let Nic and the other Twilights live long, healthy lives. And there's a lot about Twilight biology that we don't know, and I hope Theo gets some answers. In particular, I'm curious about their psychology, especially after what happened with Delico and Monroe. And since a lot of the story leans towards a Worick-centric perspective, I want to know more about what Nic's thinking.

Marco and Constance

I want to say a lot but I’m still in mourning right now so I’m just gonna say — Marco, Connie, you guys were such badasses and deserved better… I know Marco was a war criminal but that wasn’t his fault and he’s a sweet guy now, so we’re going to overlook it!

Kohske-sensei, how could you… I actually thought they’d survive.

Loretta

You know the cliche line that goes like, “Someone’s gotta make the hard choices,” or whatever? Yeah, that’s basically what Gina is doing in the latest chapters when she’s refusing to open the guild’s doors to the civilian Twilights. The thing is, people who do this are never making the actual hard choice. What they’re doing is easy — just sacrifice people you don’t care about and turn the other way. Especially easy if you don't have a big guilty conscience. Yes, Gina makes some points about why, and she’s not wrong, but I stand by what I said.

But Loretta? Nah, my girl Loretta is making the real hard choices. Characters who make choices like Gina see two options: A) Help people and inconvenience myself/cause myself to fall with them. B) Oh well. It’s unfortunate but what can you do? — not Loretta though. Those options are unacceptable so she chooses “Option C”, also known as the actual hard choice.

“Option C” in any narrative (and in real life as well) is always the one that takes the most effort and the most commitment. You have to forge the path for “Option C” yourself. Loretta is going to have to put a ton of work in and stay on top of things if she’s going to have any chance of success. Thankfully, not only is she amazing, she’s wise enough to know she can’t do it alone and asks Gina to release Nic, Alex, Nina, and Theo so they can lend a hand.

LORETTA SWEETIE YOU’RE DOING AMAZING! When she was calling Gina out to “make the humane choice” with that look in her eyes, I was like, DAMN GIRL, GET HER ASS! I am rooting for you sis!!!

Veronica

Everyone seems to be blaming the Handymen, and Nic in particular for whatever happened to Veronica. We don't have much to work with, but part of me thinks that Nic and Veronica both had/have the bad habit of overdosing and it didn't end well for her. Like, she bit off more than she could chew and they both had self-destructive tendencies? Maybe... idk. When Gina shot Nic full of downers that one time, she did say, "I believe I've already told you to quit overdosing on Cerebret. Especially the uppers. Do you want to end up like Veronica?" I think Gina cares about him even if she would never admit it, dawww. There is more to it though, but we don't have enough info right now. And I need to stew on her for a while, so I don't have much to say at the moment.

Monroe

The way Monroe spoke about Delico was… a red flag. He likely did the same with Nic. In the Blu-ray extra manga, we see a bit of how he talks about Nic in a similar way when he was a child. Monroe isn’t much different than Gaston Brown. He’s a father figure who uses people, particularly Twilights, as tools/weapons. He’s abusive and manipulative. But his way of going about it is different. He’s won the affection of those he abuses because of his charm and giving a place of belonging and a support system to those who have nothing. These are common reasons why people join gangs in real life as well, but I won’t get into that here. It would be interesting to see more of how the Handymen’s relationship was with Monroe when they were younger. I wonder if they were to look back, would they start to realize signs of his manipulation from their childhoods with their current perspective?

Everyone else

Shoutout to everyone I didn’t name. I love a lot of the characters in GANGSTA. and those who I don’t love, I still find interesting. But, my shoulders hurt so let’s end it here.

I'm... Done...

I feel like I could have picked apart the characters more, panel by panel, and there's stuff in GANGSTA: Cursed, but I had to stop somewhere.

I'm super happy that I finished catching up to this series on chapter 56. I loved the chapter as I've made abundantly clear already, and I can't wait to see how things shake out. So many questions I want answered!

Godspeed, my son.

If you’ve made it this far… you’re a real one 🫡

#GANGSTA.#manga #manga recs #manga recommendation #manga discussion #seinen manga #漫画 #おすすめ #青年漫画 #ギャングスタ

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stormydreams · 2 years ago

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[spoilers for naruto]

o h my goodness. so, in my memory of the anime, sasuke went to the nearby village to look for itachi, but in the manga (also with the later panels, and also judged off of the one scene of the fight scene against gaara where sasuke gets up and says something like "i won't watch those i care about getting killed again"), he actually goes to look for naruto, to warn him.

he doesn't want a repeat of what had happened (e.g. his brother killing people he cares about.) all those little things i notice about sasuke having so much love for his nakama is heartbreaking, because i know it's going to change very soon.....

-- also, on a more personal note: i have decided that i can't add image descriptions to everything. i am in my offline life fighting for my survival, every day. so when it's just personal posts like this, that i do for myself as a kind of online diary, then i won't put in the effort. if it's for other cartoons, where i actively want to contribute to the fandom and add tags and all of that, i will add image descriptions. (also, i have no followers, so it's fine for the things i post without tags lol)

but first and foremost this blog is for me to express all things i need to about my special interests and such, so be prepared for an onslaught of naruto fanboying in the next weeks!!! ✨

#mypost #taggedfandomthoughtz #taggednarutoz #taggedanimez

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10dance · 1 year ago

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The end of this chapter certainly took a very different approach! From Nino's speech to Fabio's ad, there's so much to unpack here...

I liked how Nino just kept talking while Suzuki was still in his angst phase, haha. It's rewarding to see Nino so determined to get Suzuki on the world stage after dismissing Suzuki's skills for so long.

(Both Shinyas look so hot in this update, so here's a nice Suzuki panel)

And I wonder if Nino will figure out that the Shinyas love each other romantically after he sees Suzuki's reaction at the mention of his name? He already concluded that Sugiki is into Suzuki to go all this way for him, but he didn't know that it was reciprocated... And like Suzuki, I wanted to cry a little when Nino flatly admitted that Sugiki was a victim in all of this politics. After so long we finally see the fruits of Sugiki's labor: Suzuki officially has Nino's blessing to compete in the 10 Dance. With this statement, I feel that the story has progressed into the final arc, and I'm so excited to see what Inoue has to offer.

Next up we have Fabio's ad. It got a little confusing because Nino's whole speech on the origins of dance overlapped with the imagery in the ad, but I know that's Inoue's intention, and overall it had a very cool effect of being half-tied to the current plot, but also leading us to the big reveal of the ad being played on the billboard in a busy part of Tokyo.

I'm surprised how heavily Aki is featured in the ad considering that most of the focus with the patron and the whole "Suzuki Shinya Project" was on Suzuki, but I love that we got to see more of Aki. The contrast between lightning and flowers is an interesting choice too, especially when we've seen lightning being more associated with Suzuki (because of Sugiki's imagining of him as the Santeria/Yoruba deity Xango). And it's so cute that Aki can be a menacing force while also fangirling about Nino Zolche in a corner, she can do it all!

The story shifts focus back to Sugiki and Max who are drinking even more alcoholic beverages lol. Once again, like back in chapter 30, the two are having another negotiation, on Sugiki's conditions this time. Max seems ready to give Sugiki everything he has, but Sugiki is still playing hard to get lol. He's going to help his loved one in his own way before learning what Max has to teach him...

I have to say that Sugiki's hotness was off the charts this time (it usually is already very high). His disheveled hair, his glances... He even called Max "Papa"??????? I really have to know if they'll keep it as Papa or change it to Daddy when the English version comes out, because I have seen it localized as such before. Either way, Sugiki is killing me.

Finally, this is my favorite page from this update. Nino says (or thinks) to Suzuki "you are the future", with both Shinyas being drawn from the same angle as if mirroring each other. I like to think of it as meaning that they're both the future, as well as they are each other's futures. And it makes me emotional to think that Sugiki could see a future in Suzuki's dance all this time and that's why he's spending all his efforts on him. It gives me the feels.

The end of chapter 40 was certainly not expected, I didn't know how to react when I first read it. But as I went through it more times and discussed it, I really like the direction the story is going in! We don't know when the next update is coming (might be very long since the exhibition is going on right now), but we'll all be waiting!

10 Dance - chapter 40, part 3 summary

Nino talks to Suzuki about the current state of the dance industry, and speculates about how he could change everything. Meanwhile, Max tries to convince Sugiki to accept his offer.

Full summary and highlight images under the cut

Chapter 40, part 3: Come On-a My Life

Published online on September 1st, 2023, available to purchase on Comic Days, or rent for 10 days on Yanmaga.

Nino starts explaining to Suzuki that the ballroom dance industry is in decline; it’s been a long time since dancing was used primarily as a means of communication between young men and women. The industry is currently being supported by old people who were young long ago when dance was flourishing, and since that affluence keeps the industry afloat, that’s the sort of audience it attracts. Suzuki internally wonders what Nino’s getting so worked up about, and thinks about him saying that he wanted to become his coach. Nearby, Norman notices the pair talking, and thinks that maybe Suzuki has finally won him over just as Sugiki planned. Nino continues on, saying that the bigwigs in the industry who reap the benefits may have once been dancers themselves, but now all they care about is fighting for their positions. Suzuki holds his head and internally thinks that his mind was just full of thoughts about Sugiki and he doesn’t get what Nino’s talking about. Nino states that Sugiki is a victim of this current system, which Suzuki reacts to strongly enough that Nino wonders what he just felt (This also sets off a visual sequence that starts running simultaneously as Nino continues talking, which I’ll describe after each paragraph to keep the summary less jumbled). Nino says that he’s going to grant Sugiki’s wish, which causes tears to start pouring from Suzuki’s eyes. Nino asks why he’s crying, and whispers that he’s going to make sure he can compete in the 10 Dance even with his D rank classification in Standard. He says that just being the 10 Dance champion isn’t the height of what Suzuki can do, and there’s much more that lies ahead for him. He can become a superstar, and has the power to transcend the limits of competitive dancing.

The visual sequence starts with imagery of prehistoric creatures up to the evolution of humans, with an image of Suzuki dancing and narrative text about an undulation manifesting from one’s DNA. It says that dancing is not about the movement of one’s legs, or the steps that are performed, as the running legs of both a large cat and human are shown. The moment before each step is taken, one absorbs power from the earth, the floor. Aki appears, and her hair turns into flames.

The scene moves over to Max and Sugiki, where Max has fixed him another drink. He says that he uses drinks like this highball to measure the sense of distance between himself and the person he’s talking to, similar to how the Japanese or British might use talk about the weather to gauge the other person’s state of mind. He thinks it’s a smart way to not close the distance too suddenly. Though right now is more the time to attack directly, as he’s looking for a successor, yet no one accepted the role. Sugiki asks if he’s saying he doesn’t mind the Muldaur family’s special training being utilized for the dance industry, and Max says Sugiki is free to use it to help the one he loves. He leans in closer and says Sugiki could even learn how to seize control behind the scenes.

Back to Nino’s speech (which now in addition to the fantastical imagery is also accompanied by scenes of people gathering around a street corner to look at something high above them), he says that Suzuki has a powerful ability to transmit to people; in fact, it’s more like an infection. He can excite people who have no idea what ballroom dancing is and make them want to dance. In ancient times people communicated through gestures, songs, and dancing, to the point where children might learn to dance even before they could walk. He says Suzuki unconsciously awakens these memories that still lurk in people’s DNA. The people who want to dance because of him will shout his name to the whole world. The dancer named “Shinya Suzuki” will become known the world over, much like how people who know nothing about basketball still know the name Michael Jordan.

The imagery continues with Aki appearing to be underwater moving among various sea creatures, and the narrative text says that electricity flows through the earth we stand upon. Suzuki appears surrounded by flowers and the text says that amid the wind and waves a fluctuation appears. Absorbed into the rhythm, dance is life itself.

Sugiki asks Max to confirm that he’s not thinking of actually formally adopting him, to which Max replies that he is correct. Sugiki says he has some conditions to lay out, stating that he has his own plan to see to completion, so he won’t take on any guidance from Max until that’s done, and also Max can’t interfere in any way with what he’s doing. If he can’t grant him that, then he should find another successor. Max asks if he has any idea how many other people he’s considering for the role, and says it’d be best for him to decide now. Sugiki gets up from his chair and says he’ll be taking his leave now, thanking Max for the things he’s done for him. Max wonders if he’ll give an answer to his proposal as he offers to have someone take him home, but Sugiki says he’ll go back on his own. As Max keeps wondering, Sugiki says he’s in no hurry to give him an answer and calls him “Papa” as he walks out. Max feels like he may have just sold his soul to the devil.

Nino declares that Suzuki can fulfill the world with his rhythm, and that he is the future. The narrative text says that dance is the heartbeat, and that it has no need for costumes, showing an unclothed Suzuki and Aki standing next to each other. It’s revealed that the dramatic imagery and narration from the chapter was from a large video ad for Fabio Schiaparelli’s brand playing on the side of a building, which many mesmerized passersby stopped to watch.

Previous chapter: #40 part 2

Next chapter: Currently, there is no information on the date for the next update.

#rb #spoilers #10 dance chapter 40.3 #10 dance volume 8

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notimeliketoday · 2 years ago

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Exploration on Two Shots, Maya Kitajima & Togashi’s Possible Intent Behind The Story’s Relationships. (1)

PART II

Or to put it bluntly, a musing on the popular conceptions people have with Kurama and Maya's relationship - a different take.

Please excuse my ramblings and random date mentions. I'm just keeping track of how long since I started writing this whole thing. This may be the longest length of time I dedicated to writing my takes on something - just imagine an entire year.

Let me just mark this as posted on September 11, 2022 6:24 pm UTC +8 / GMT +8 because with the unrivaled dedication I poured into this, I deserve to remember when I decided to throw my hands up and left caution to the wind to post this whole thing lol.

Thanks to @yyh4ever for the translations and additional help with the whole thing, and @ombreecha for your insight.

Note: the first one's for the manga version.

Where did it all begin? Kurama in a corner while his peers in class were talking about an incident involving students going missing. The rest is history.

From the beginning, the heroine's introduction is off to a bad start. She was unfavorably compared to her nameless female friend. The first bad sign of what's to come.

The reader is then shown who this "Maya Kitajima '' or just plain "Kitajima" that an irrelevant and nameless character mentions. She started to include Kurama into their conversation, getting more and more animated the longer she talked. That was when her personality came into full display.

Interesting to note, and the first inconsistency I noticed concerning the "Kurama fell in love with Maya from the beginning" notion, is that during the entire conversation with her, Kurama's body language suggests distance, that he doesn't see her any differently from the rest of their classmates. He was even turned away from her when he answered. If Shuichi made an effort to at least be more open, Togashi would've drawn him turning even just his head towards her. In fact, when she then stated how boring his logic was to the disappearances, he gently told her how idiotic her ideas were.

Not to mention the way that Maya's subsequent replies sounded utterly nonsensical by the minute, with her gestures exaggerated, sets it up so it greatly lessened the impact when she said that she had Reikan. Shuichi went so far as to focus more on the eraser than her at that point.

Really, Shuichi?!

The implication on how easily the eraser captured and retained his attention when she's saying something important about herself I leave to you all.

Maya was meant to be an adorable weirdo whose unique hidden potential draws Kurama's attention. That was how Togashi built her up. One could say he played with the chuunibyou trope with her since she's legit, possessing the spiritual energy she brags about.

It's almost no different from the so-called spiritual masters Genkai promptly humiliated during her disciple selection. You'd think a potential love interest would be treated a lot more seriously from the start.

I'll say this: for all Keiko is his least favorite character, Togashi didn't treat her as badly as he did Maya.

I read the whole manga to see exactly how he did things and for accuracy and comparison's sake.

Just as interestingly, her outfit blends with her friends. This is the supposed heroine of this side chapter: indistinguishable from other nameless characters.

Kurama got a different outfit from his peers in this chapter but she did not, even with her prominence. It's not important I'm sure.

It's a sad thing that the very first time she was mentioned was a jab to her by one of her friends and thereby ensuring she isn't going to be truly significant no matter how important she's framed with her first appearance.

Centre aisle everyone?

However, the next panels indicate she may be more important than first assumed after all.

Kurama was then musing about said missing incident when Hedoki showed up and bragged about his intention to kill him, which Maya saw.

So she was right after all and that means Kurama can finally have someone he can talk about his past, and the truth of his identity, and later become his official love interest right? Yay!

No.

I'm sorry, but his response is outright gaslighting her. He even thought, "She was actually able to see it?" and his affirmation of its existence sounds more like a concession with how it was followed by him thinking his presence awakened it in the first place. This means he thought little of her ability and he believed that whatever little spiritual awareness she had had awakened and heightened from his close contact with her.

Then to really hit it home: "What do you mean? Maybe it was just your imagination."

Doesn't sound romantic, does it?

He could've just said that it's nothing and leave it at that and Maya's response can still be the same. I know it's the same gaslighting, but the insult is less harsh than how he did it.

There lies the second inconsistency with the romance route. You think Kurama would've demeaned the potential ability of his first love in the manner he did? Perhaps it can be argued he did it to protect her, and it's true in a way. But I've just discussed how his reception to it went above. There was also how he answered her questions and theories in the classroom. It wasn't even her claim of possessing spiritual energy he subtly questioned at that point, it was her very own sanity. He was all "you really believe that?" with his "I think that’s a bit far from reality"/ "Not possible". All in all, he sounds more like he thought very little of her as a person.

It can be taken that he didn't mean any insult and simply stating a fact, but his deliberate distance, not bothering to turn even just his head to address her, says differently.

Its purpose is to portray to the readers why Maya's female friend would be defensive in her level of credulousness, and show us the depth of Maya's own credulity through her interaction with him in that scene, though we are supposed to see this trait and her antics as endearing if only through Tasaka's (the male friend) crush on her and Kurama's supposed feelings in his inner monologue during his rejection.

He was acting like he was only speaking to her for the sake of politeness and her insistence to get into his personal space. There is nothing that says "I like this girl more than a classmate".

You can't even say that's him pushing her away when he could've treated her better than that.

I mean, is this the look of a guy who's looking at his crush?

His eyes are not as dull-looking and lifeless when he is talking to Hiei in his room!

In all actuality, if this intends to illustrate that her antics are cute or simply has any effect to Shuichi/Kurama and overall a lighthearted interaction, he would’ve reacted something. Maybe he could’ve sweat dropped like he did with Botan’s own flights of fancy, or even just smile towards her. Anything could’ve work better than this cold indifference. **

So where does that possibility of Kurama loving or his feelings of fondness for her come from?

The narrative sets her up for that role when it illustrates how Kurama-centric the root of Maya's ability from, as if she on her own won't possess it if they never meet. She's also the only one to get it through her contact with him.

(Something that isn't somehow repeated with Keiko and Atsuko with their much greater exposure to demons and entering Makai itself.)

Screams "meant to be", isn't it?

Tragic to think that it also implies that it is only her wishful thinking and interest in occult stuff that makes her believe she's special at the same time beforehand.

What happened next was her insisting that she wasn't wrong. That what she'd seen and heard was true. It's good that she got that much faith in her ability, otherwise she would've been crushed by Kurama's words.

Here comes her true reason for paying so much attention to him. She sensed he was different from the others, just like her. Then she added how happy she was to find the sort of person she'd long wanted to meet, someone who can relate to her, and maybe help validate that the strange things she saw from time to time is not just a product of her overactive imagination. Just as luckily, it's the guy she fell in love with.

We can see that he didn't even know about her feelings for him because of his surprised look and Maya saying, "So you really didn't know?"

Now here's the answer to how romance came into the picture. Maya detracted from her original question the moment she asked if he didn't know [of her feelings]. So when she persisted with "but you still haven't answered me yet" it now diverted from her asking him about the demon to how he feels towards her.

Kurama tried his best to dissuade her from probing further, and here's the awaited hint that he may reciprocate her interest after all.

"I can't... I can't say it". / "If I tell her how I really feel, I'll surely put her in danger."

(JP direct translation from @yyh4ever on twitter )

I will be blunt: this came out of nowhere.

At least the most accurate Japanese translation is. When I asked my friend @ombreecha - who I also requested to read this specific chapter - where it was hinted he reciprocated her feelings, she pointed out this one (the translation she read was the "I can't say it" line), something I agree with.

There's nothing that indicates he thought of her as his crush regardless of his need for distance from his peers in the classroom. If anything his body language and actions when talking to her is borderline rude, his words aside. That's too much for his "pushing her away for her sake" schtick.

He never repeated this level of distance in the series to anyone else. This is the rudest he could ever be to anyone not his enemy. Does this still scream romantic to you?

In comparison, her twist as the real deal possessor of spiritual energy is handled a lot better, and even that is not that good. His inner monologue and surprise over her feelings implies he didn't care to pay closer attention other than to know she got a hidden ability, yet it's still barely enough for his acknowledgement.

Not to mention they are supposed to be talking about that demon they both see and the admission of truth concerning their abilities while Kurama is doing his best to deny it. Then it suddenly flips into him hiding his feelings out of nowhere where it somehow becomes the most important thing to zero in.

That's what made this baffling.

It makes more sense if Kurama DID reject her claim that he is extraordinary. She was pushing him to tell someone about his abilities (i.e. herself) and put pressure on him that compelled him to deny it just to hide the truth about the incident and himself. It will flow better why she would say "[she] is ready and listening" rather than her confessing and probing him for his. The reason she will get so hurt by his answer then is because he inadvertently rejected her and her desire to get closer to him.

It need not be romantic on his side.

Ironically, the "I can't say it" translation flows better with this interpretation.

Maybe this is why the translator chose this wording.

What this part should have been would be him conflicted with his conviction to make her stay away from him or to finally have a true friend who knows who he is, not a love interest - yet. It would then be supported that there's an underlying implication he wanted to form a stronger bond with her, thanks to her spiritual sense and potential to be sympathetic to his true nature through her own interest in occult stuff, but couldn't due to the risk it posed. The reason I can say it need not be romantic in nature - at first - would be thanks to Hiei and what he offered later on.

It's actually thanks to this sudden change of topic that Maya sounds cocky and made her unlikable in my opinion because she's implying he should know about it in the first place. Granted, the whole class presumably knows but that required a level of engagement he wasn't interested in. It's like she thought she and her feelings are important enough to warrant such attention, or one was really blind if they didn't know something so blatant. It's funny, however, because she herself isn't sensitive enough to his own feelings and just tries to force her friendship without trying to understand what it is that he wants, only her interests. She's lucky he supposedly got a crush on her and he really did want to bond with someone who can understand him, otherwise her actions would have been intrusive had he been more like Hiei.

If she had pressed him to finally admit his hidden ability while offhandedly confessing her feelings, it may be more sympathy-inducing when he blew her off. It meant she did not pressure him with her confession but that she is open for more should he choose to confide in her.

Something like...

(Original dialogue spilling her feelings) and then this:

Maya: Admit it! You've really talked to that demon! Come on! Don't be shy. I understand that very well. It's not easy to be unable to share our experiences because other people won't believe us. But if you open up, you won't be alone anymore. I will be here to lend you an ear.

"Go ahead. Tell me.. I'm ready. I'm listening." - (Her own line in the confession above.)

It's precisely because this was not how things went that his rebuff made her only look pitiful with how cocky sounding she was before that.

I do believe that making Kurama open up to her is the original point of her probing him to tell her but the timing of her confession circumvented her words as though she's actively pressuring to get a confession out of him with the expectation he felt the same.

The OVA pulled it off in such a way that she really WAS pressuring him for his feelings towards her for the romance to be much clearer.

As I stated above, the whole thing with Maya was done poorly from the start. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say that Togashi attempted a then-atypical method of an underdog heroine for this chapter and did not bother to develop her initial characterization. She was built up as this chuunibyou with love of occult who turned out to be real but the payoff wasn't satisfying due to the sudden insert of the romance at her most critical moment.

Not saying that the romance is impossible but with the lack of build up on Kurama's side for that aspect, it's still premature on his part. It should be just a prelude to that specific possibility, not the actual mutual pining.

It's also an observation Ombree shared as well.

She gets shot down! Gently.

She then leaves with the sting of bitter rejection. What's more, it's a triple blow she got.

Let's think about it. Her feelings getting rejected, getting gaslighted by her first love and the crushing disappointment. Perhaps she was tired of feeling being alone in her uniqueness and wanted to maybe finally be taken seriously for once. Maybe she's not unaware of how her friends thought of her love of occult stuff and her credulousness and it pained her. More than anything, it hurts the most knowing that Minamino-kun was not so different from the rest after all. He also didn't believe in anything occult-related. He thought of her ideas stupid, and even insane. The way she immediately accepted and turned away just from a few words showed that this is expected despite hoping otherwise. It didn't mean it didn't hurt her though.

Oddly enough, she merely got sad during her rejection but didn't cry. It seems that in the manga, at least, she was not hurt as badly as her OVA counterpart because she already braced herself for a negative response, and her hopes weren't as steep. I see this to mean that she's already used to disappointments.

It was at this point that it's clear that though Togashi made an effort to build up Maya and the potential for the romance through mutual points such as her spiritual powers and interest in occult, which helped bridge their gap to one another, he also spent just as much time tearing them down - did it side by side in fact.

Even the little tidbit about her worrying over her weight hindering Shuichi did not escape as another means to demean her. Because the natural (and common) anime response by anyone in her position would've been to ask what's going on first and worry about the situation instead of focusing on how heavy they are. That's why Kurama answered her "that's not the problem right now" as it was not the right question to ask right there.

It was showing that she still got the mind to be conscious of her weight over prioritizing the more pressing matter in front of her.

I do concede it could also be just to show how out of depth Maya was with what she found herself and her crush in. She was responding according to how her brain processed the happenings; she was just a naive adolescent in the middle of a confusing situation. The point still stands however, due to Kurama's answer to her question and how she was written thus far.

When he grabbed her, she looked hopeful. Perhaps he's changed his mind and it's all a prank?

But his stance and words scream caution.

An enemy attacks!

Nah, false alarm on both ends. It's just Hiei.

The new arrival was just a demon looking for an Ice Maiden, and our male lead thought he's one of the enemies they each thought were working for their target.

All the while, Maya's forgotten and got taken during the scuffle. Togashi didn't even make Kurama gently drop her off before fending off Hiei.

I know it can be explained away as her distraction from the fight in front of her that she didn't sense another demon from behind her back but Togashi creating the proper conditions just so she would inevitably get caught was yet again to mean how little her spiritual powers matter in the grand scheme of things. If anything, Maya was more shown as the girl who was infatuated with Shuichi while her potential was just barely an afterthought.

So they learned who they were meant to fight and a new acquaintanceship formed which upgraded to alliance with her kidnapping.

It's obvious Kurama would never have joined the fight had she not been captured, and just as obvious Hiei wouldn't win the fight against Yatsude by himself. Maya's purpose was fulfilled.

When Hiei asked him for his motive for joining, he answered with "nonsense" / "don't be smart" which means he didn't want someone he just met thinking of his link with Maya.

Yet another point against the romantic view. The OVA alters this line with "we both have our priorities / we're both concerned" that recognizes her part for his cooperation. It makes sense with how it altered their dynamic.

Of course, the real enemy needed to show up at some point.

This is the other part where people are so convinced of Kurama's romantic feelings for her. How else would it explain his only instance of recklessness throughout the entire series?

I tried to make an objective view as possible so Ombree gave me her take on this part. I also tried to look for any official sources that discuss this one-shot and Maya to the best of my ability (and the language barrier), and went back to rereading and rewatching the whole thing many times for a year now (since the 2nd week of September 2021 iirc). I also asked for help on the translations as well as for clarifications from mori on twitter as well.

Ombree said he's more enraged at her loss and doesn't feel guilt is present when I asked her for it. But I think it's both and more. In her defense, this is the only chapter she read.

It can also be explained as his rage at losing control of the situation, anger that someone was killed so brutally, as well as anger towards himself for failing his classmate. It's a myriad of emotions manifesting into deep hate against the enemy. It need not be solely romantic for him to react this way.

How else do you expect him to react to the only kidnapping he "fails" at?

It's a logical fallacy to assume that the more explosive his reaction to someone's kidnapping and threats means that it's how strongly he feels towards someone.

It's like saying he loved his mother less than Maya because he didn't react this way for her sake. Willing to die sure, but get into a reckless rage he didn't do for her.

Or Amanuma, whose death provokes him to mercilessly punish Elder Toguro more than he did to those who threatened her.

It's like saying Hiei cared the most about Yusuke with how reckless and angry he was over the latter's second demise against Sensui, to the point Kurama himself points out he doesn't care about surviving the fight.

See a pattern here?

Maya, his supposed love interest, and Amanuma, a boy he just had the misfortune to strike down thanks to the machinations of a madman on the same day they met, invokes the same degree of intense hatred from him in two different ways.

All because of two aspects: they "died" during the ordeal. Only Kurama also bears the burden of those "deaths".

See these two important common factors.

It's why these failures are much more crushing to bear than the one time the group faced Yusuke's second death, for one thing.

Even saving his mother got outside help twice - Yusuke giving a part of his life, and when he, Jin and co. helped him defy Yomi's orders alongside the threat of Mukuro defeating him that ensured his mother will not suffer the consequences of his rebellion.

To the rescue!

I can say that even in this, it's shown that Togashi handled this kidnapping as though it's no different from him trying to rescue any other girl.

Proof?

He never called her by name when asking Yatsude. Sounds way too impersonal to me.

Now, I would agree with the accusation that this will just be nit picking on things but we need to look at the other times he referred to a girl this way.

These examples have something in common: he wasn't even acquainted with the girls in question yet during those times.

He could've easily said "Your underling grabbed my friend (or even just "my classmate") Maya earlier today. Where is she?"

She's already captured so any more extra caution about their connection should be obsolete but he still chose not to acknowledge it to the enemy. He still chose to put up a front that she was just a nobody he was trying to save.

Compare that to Yusuke who always mentioned Keiko's name even when the villain didn't know her at all.

I also agree that this on its own is negligible.

Except….

When Hedoki captured Maya, he was thinking of taunting Kurama about her through Yatsude, indicating this was his objective in handing her to him. However, there was no dialogue between them that clues us that the latter had known her ties to Kurama or treat it as anything important. If anything, he was merely saying that she would make a good gift for him and congratulating the former for doing a good job selecting his meal.

You know, like if he caught any other girl since he prefers them.

If he even bothered to care about asking the purpose for Hedoki’s gift, Yatsude may have perhaps used her to taunt Kurama for real. He would also not say "Is she a friend?" if he knew the capture was intentionally done to provoke him.

He was merely reacting at their invasion in his hideout rather than caring about provoking another demon through someone they care about.

The taunts he did were more coy and detached than the usual kidnapping case regardless if the subject in question was a then-unknown Ice Maiden or just a random girl his underling chose for him. He is really indifferent about them beyond how tasty they are, though there was more emphasis on the Ice Maiden since he made that false rumor about eating one presumably to increase his reputation.

If we actually compare his responses to Hiei's and Kurama's demands, it looks more like he baited Hiei more intentionally. Kurama was just another pest he had to deal with at the same time.

At a closer inspection, Hiei's attempts to find the Ice Maiden is actually a parallel to what was happening with Kurama and Maya.

Let's remove the knowledge that they're siblings and the plot between him and Yukina, and just look at this one-shot through a first timer's eyes.

This guy goes to such lengths to find a maiden whose name isn't revealed yet. Someone attempts to find out the nature of their relationship, but he was evasive about it because his personality is that of an arrogant lone wolf archetype. So his relationship with her is questionable, but one that can be mistaken as romantic.

Sounds familiar, right?

She was then said to be eaten by the enemy he's currently pursuing to gauge the truth. The ferocity he is fighting the enemy automatically cements that it must be for a romantic reason because, let's be real, we really don't immediately think they're a brother and sister especially with his character archetype - especially during those times until today - unless it's outright stated. This archetype is even one of the most common male leads in romances, particularly in shoujo works where the heroine is the one to thaw the ice for them to care about her.

(It's actually hilarious in hindsight how he played this role with Mukuro but in reverse. He was the one who did the thawing of her heart even before they officially met, according to her inner monologue right after his duel with Shigure, and after the Three Kings arc with her past.)

The villain in question seems like he's baiting the guy because he specifically mentions eating an Ice Maiden, even if it's a lie just to up his reputation of strength - the very type he is looking for. It's also lightly implied it isn't the first time they fight. Another clash is obviously inevitable.

Though he partially succeeds with his goal, we are still not told precisely what their relationship is until the end.

Just as how we are not told precisely what Maya is to Kurama.

Continuing that parallel later which reveals this bond as siblings and not romantic, then it also matches how in the end the relationship between them stayed as friends.

But there's a contrast as well and it is really recent, like just this May recent, that I noticed it.

The way Hiei questioned Yatsude is pointed and very specific. The identity of the maiden in question is important for him to know. So Yatsude responded the same way by treating it as a great secret only those in his confidence know about.

Kurama on the other hand worded his question as if he's asking about some girl that honestly could just be anyone captured that afternoon - like how should he know which one? That's why he was taunted with a random leg of a dead girl.

The only reason he could determine which one after his defeat was because her death was delayed thanks to him eating Hedoki first so he wasn't hungry yet before Hiei and Kurama barged into his territory.

It may seem like nothing but it matters a lot. You'll see why below.

Through comparing the two girls' importance presented we can see that the Ice Maiden is more relevant in the eyes of the villain of the story as though she's the heroine due to her significant usefulness for him both for his reputation and his strength - nameless and faceless as she is then.

This bit is brilliant because it subtly establishes that the then unnamed maiden will be a more prominent supporting character than the "heroine" of this portion. It's also a nod to the earlier volume where a villain really did use Yukina for his own gains; chronologically, it would've been a foreshadowing for that as well.

How in the end Maya is never seen nor relevant again (aside from an anime removed flashback in Dark Tournament).

She's even the foil to Maya's human.

You trying to tell us something, Togashi-sensei?

In my opinion: yeah, definitely. In more ways than one, especially considering the observations I laid out above.

It's also a hint to what he thinks will fit Kurama best.

Now, I actually thought that these are all there is to analyze about the plot and characters but it turns out there are more.

(Yeah, behold the beauty of taking almost a year to post one's thoughts. There's room for revision and new ideas. The one with the double asterisk above and below itself is conceived just this September 3 and made me internally scream because at this rate I may never get to publish this at all!)

It literally only came up to me right when I was in the middle of studying for my exam to boot! Hello to my July 23, 2022 struggle!

So, I said that Maya is the heroine of this portion and Shuichi/Kurama the male lead. Following the common conventions of shoujo plot romances, Hiei would have been the second male lead. In a way, he is. However, there were things subtly established by Togashi to avert tropes associated with the typical shoujo stories.

Hiei, as the second male lead, should've been besotted with Maya the heroine, but he not only looks down on her, he also only speaks about her in derision and scorn.

He also has his own heroine to save - a heroine later revealed to be not a romantic partner but a sister.

Where the end of the story should've culminated with the male lead ending up together with the heroine while the second lead ends up heartbroken but accepting of her choice, it ended with her getting cut out of her love interest's life while the two male leads form a new bond without her in the picture.

Maybe this is why Togashi showed Kurama dropping her and completely forgetting about her the moment he clashed with Hiei in favor of chattering with the latter until Tasaka called him asking her whereabouts?**

I know Togashi is a genius in his works but this is really the time it truly amazed me. To think he did all this angry and tired. The subtle nuances especially on the parallels and contrasts between each character are masterfully conveyed especially if you care to look deeper.

It is not merely just a meeting between both male leads that he was forced to make. He really did make an effort to the best of his abilities to tell this story and how it connected to the main story thematically and chronologically.

This is the reason for its popularity. He did not treat this halfheartedly but poured his heart into it. So anything shown here is done on purpose.

Those irrelevant on its own are collectively relevant to parse together the whole picture he wants to impart.

If this still doesn't convince people Maya's just a plot device however, I dunno what to tell you.

Poor girl got the short end of the stick!

Not even in this was she given her due as the supposed first love. I can no longer make excuses about this now. It's already far past the point for it.

Kurama is also the sort of character to be protective of girls because he's a mama's boy already by then. There is that too.

When I read this part, it feels like Togashi needs to give something to make Kurama and Hiei fight together for the first time that doesn't involve the former's mother getting kidnapped; who better to use than a classmate who liked the former and for whom he could possibly felt the same in turn?

They defeat Yatsude. Their issues are solved. Yahoo!

It did, except that this solidifies Kurama's principle not to get too close to anyone, while also ensuring Maya doesn't end up suffering trauma from the incident or worse get kidnapped again this time by demons wanting to get revenge or fight against him. This means her memories got to go.

There's a plausible second support for the romantic route on this portion. Kurama looked wistful when he removed her memories. It felt like he didn't want to do it and finally cut off ties with her.

However, it can also be perceived as his sadness with his decision to sever the bond with a friend he will never again allow to get close to him.

Hiei's impact in this (not) love story.

Everything one needs to discredit the romance is all thanks to him!

Need I also say how it took some of the focus from Kurama and Maya and shifts into getting to know more about Hiei and who he's searching for, and the last conversation exchanged at the ending?

The moment Hiei appeared was the moment Maya's role started to diminish. I'm not talking about Hiei's status as a main character, but at the standpoint of their interactions with Kurama.

Where he was guarded during his brief interactions with her, he had no problem probing into personal territory with a demon he just met. Hiei even calls him out on it. So this shows that Kurama would open up to someone who is at least aware of his true nature while being withdrawn from ordinary peers.

Hiei's advent unfolded the possibility that he once entertained venturing with Maya. It's more apparent with how they bonded immediately.

I believe he is the tool to tell the readers what Kurama wanted at that point (if you really wanna go there - ideal friend*) and to downplay the romance. I believe his nature as a demon also greatly influenced this closeness simply for the sole reason that he's the only one who can understand him as one of the same ilk. It's why out of everyone, they are the closest of friends despite the difference in temperament. It's why her spiritual awareness is what made her notable above the rest of the classmates. It's why the only thing he could say, and implied to notice, about her is this hidden ability.

It's why many can say that the romance is not strong enough to support the pairing between Kurama and Maya in the manga (even the OVA to an extent) chiefly due to how much better his dynamic with Hiei is, for all that they just met.

Most of all, it's why she was never shown again in person during the series proper. He already obtained what he secretly longed for with the gang. Her role ended the moment they cooperated against Yatsude.

From what I’ve seen, I can also say that the reason Kurama was first drawn to her was thanks to her status as a novelty to him in the sense that she's the first person with spiritual ability that isn't hostile to him since his rebirth in the Human World. He may not respect her meager abilities but he may have thought she will do for a potential close friend he can be completely honest with as not only is she the only one around him at that point with any spiritual ability at all but also because she’s the only one to bother trying to befriend him. Maybe he also finds her entertainingly cute with her antics.

This unfortunately adds more weight on why he immediately went all chummy with a certain fire demon after things were cleared, and why he loves taunting and annoying him. The ease in which he opened up to the gang in their first meeting, as though they're long time friends just after the Three Dark Artifacts portion is also a clue to this. It is yet another plausible reason why he was never shown again with another potential romantic partner. That novelty wore off by the time the series started.

(*I said friends not lovers. Togashi makes it clear who he thinks suits Hiei best through Mukuro.)

#yu yu hakusho #two shots #shuichi minamino #kurama #hiei #maya kitajima #yoshihiro togashi

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earthstellar · 2 years ago

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saw this and because I literally never stop thinking about Transformers I immediately realised that in Pharma’s med bay on Messatine, Ambulon was absolutely “the resident”, lmao :’(

I know this because it’s hard to even find panels where he’s not actively working, lol, with the fucked up paint job and everything, look at him

you know he was Having Some Kind of Time through the whole rust plague thing because the entire time he’s been at Delphi he’s just been like “when can I transfer, can I get Pharma to give me a reference, does First Aid know anybody who might be hiring, if I go back to Cybertron is it worth the pay cut, if they ask me for my certifications do those databases even exist anymore”

I mean technically he was a Ward Manager, but we don’t know how medical career progression works in the TF universe and I always get a distinct “forever resident” vibe from Ambulon (possibly just because life dunked on him so hard), so I’m just gonna stick with that in my own perception of things lmao

also since Ambulon was working under Pharma/alongside First Aid, and we know he went through his Act of Affiliation relatively recently, I wonder how that might have affected his role in any healthcare provision duties... or how previously being not-an-Autobot might have impacted the way he was treated professionally by others, at least at first.

I also wonder about the process of integrating Decepticon and Autobot medics together into non-factional healthcare services after the conflict ended

because oh my god...

holy shit can you imagine what the Reintegration Act post-war was like from the point of view of the fucking medical teams

“hey we’re going to be introducing a few more staff members, check out the new roster”

“thank Primus, we need more people in... wait...HE’S THE BOT WHO KILLED--”

“yeah I know, he got some of mine too. he’ll be on the Cyberpathology Team.”

can you fucking imagine this process!!!!

like we know medical units were a target during the war, as unfortunately they are also often targeted in real life (my dad was an Army medic, I know this to be true)

and enemy medics may well have been asked to advise on any strategic actions against opposing medical units... it’s grim, but that’s war, and Cybertron has no Geneva Convention.

it would have been so fucking rough trying to form a non-factional healthcare system on Cybertron after the war, hooooly shit

thinking about all the possible safeguarding concerns, like the amount of shit that probably went into figuring out how to manage the Reintegration Act in regards to healthcare services must have been next level

I would imagine healthcare/medical services were probably among the last services to fully actually integrate, even if they did start to attempt integration efforts early (if only for the sake of ensuring all Cybertronians regardless of any prior factional allegiance may then feel able to access and obtain care if needed without fear of bias or lingering factional discrimination)

it’s a hell of a situation to have to figure out

I’d imagine they likely had people working in pairs for at least some time while sorting out how to fully integrate in a safe and agreeable way, lmao fuuuuck

(the reason I say that is because when a healthcare worker is suspected of intentionally harming or murdering patients in a hospital, it is often the case that staff will then be made to work in pairs whenever possible for the sake of surveillance until the investigation is concluded. sadly, this is very much a real thing which has happened on some notable occasions.

paired working can also be mandated when a service’s mortality statistics are notably higher than what is expected, typically also as part of a further investigation; it might be only certain staff etc. that are asked to pair up, or depending on the investigative approach, they might bring in externally affiliated observers either as an alternative or in addition to this type of measure. lots of variables, but it’s something that can and has definitely been done in specific situations.

it’s super grim so I won’t go too much more into this, but if you want to know about this kind of shit, check out the Stafford Hospital Scandal and the Stepping Hill Hospital Incident for a couple examples.)

it was probably not a great time for anyone for a good minute or so!!!

circling back around to my original point here though LOL, I truly feel for Ambulon, dude went through nothing but bullshit lmao

anyway, consider this post part of my never-ending campaign to get a canonical Med Bay mini-series of some kind, please just give me Scrubs but with space robots already, god it would be so good

#mtmte #lost light #ambulon #tf pharma #idw pharma #med bay #maccadam #maccadams #medbay #medbay posting #long post #analysis post #transformers analysis #transformers lore #reintegration act #idw 1 #idw transformers

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ayameyumesaki · 2 years ago

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Tokyo Babylon - CLAMP Premium Collection - Commentary Part 11

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Finally! We come to my favorite chapter ever in Tokyo Babylon, Save Chapter 😭 Another chapter that speaks about Subaru's personality, and a touching chapter with matters I think most of us could relate. I hope this chapter will help whoever shared, or know, the same problem will be able to relate and take Subaru's action into heart....but it will be talked in the next part lol

Talking about the chapter cover first, when I saw his clothing here, I was like "wasn't this Eagle (MKR)'s outfit?????". I think it's not exactly Eagle, but one of his staffs, but ANYWAY, in this chapter, we are going deeper towards the main plot and one of major chapters in this series.

So, we started our story from a certain school, where this school will go to Shizuoka for their school outing and stay for one night. They will create groups for room assignment etc., and the girls were excited for it---except one girl.

The teacher said it's been decided, and the teacher called Hashimoto. She hasn't been assigned to any group, so the teacher asked the other team to accept her, and they went "noo" "I don't want tooo". She stayed quiet and the teacher called her.

The teacher then told her, it's okay to be calm, but she should be assertive as well. If she didn't make an effort, then she won't be able to make friends. She probably couldn't do it during the breaks or lunch break, but anyway, if she didn't put an effort, she won't be able to enter her friends' circle. She is already a second year as well.

Then he told her, if you don't make friends during your school times, then when you entered the society, it will be boring. Well, this is an all-girls school and all of them are just children, so they aren't bad. If Hashimoto makes an effort, then you can make a friend as well. I think Hashimoto also has a responsibility for why you are always alone.

Okay, so up to this point, we are introduced with a high-school girl named Hashimoto and she was outcasted by the students in her class. The teachers told her to give her best on making friends, but she hasn't shown speaking to anyone so far. But it's pretty clear, to me, that her friends were the one who doesn't want to accept her, and she doesn't want to do anything with them as well.

Why?

This panel should be enough to tell the reason.

Save me, she said.

You see. So, after she was done with the teachers, her classmates stopped her when she wanted to come home and they kinda kicked her for nothing, even when she didn't say anything. They threatened Hashimoto if she spoke about them what they do to her to the teacher they won't forgive her, and when Hashimoto showed a slight hatred to them, they began to kick her down and used her body like a mat. They left her alone under the rain, and that's the panel above.

Hashimoto is a bullying victim. That's the main theme for this chapter. Actually, this will be talked further in the next chapter, but let's keep the theme of this chapter first for now.

In the next page, we got this panel and the whole conversation is just so cute 🥺

Subaru, seemingly to be in rush, came out from his room so cutely it hurts my heart and Hokuto-nee-chan is already prepared everything for him. She however told him that "it's strange that Subaru is sleeping until after noon" and Subaru, in panic as he prepared his bag while buttoning his shirt, replied with "yesterday I have work until late night, so I just slept this morning".

Then Hokuto asked him when he slept and he said "around 10 AM" and Hokuto goes "THEN YOU ONLY SLEPT FOR TWO HOURS!?" 😭😭 did he really sleep for two hours and still functioning properly, like boy, if I got only two hours of sleep I will pass out the moment I wake up huhu I wonder how he can stay alive if he slept for two hours a day?

But no! He didn't sleep just two hours!

He told Hokuto that he slept longer than two hours and said he slept for two hours and ten minutes. The vertical panel's Hokuto is me. 10 minutes oversleep isn't adding anything for me as well 😥

Then Hokuto told Subaru that lately, Subaru is so focused on his jobs and Subaru said "yes, because..." and Hokuto continued with "this is his job, after all".

Hokuto then asked, "Because you are someone who wore seriousness like clothes and walked around with it, even when it's a holiday because of our school's founding anniversary, you still go to school for supplementary lesson, right?" while tying Subaru's tie (in her way) and Subaru replied with "Yes. If I didn't do it, then I don't have enough attendance numbers."

Hokuto also said that "Japan's compulsory education only applied until middle school, and Subaru is already a first-year of high school, so you want to go to university?" and Subaru said "yes".

Hokuto said "so you don't want to give up your old dream, huh?" and Subaru cutely replied with "ye--yes" while blushing 😭 CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE Hokuto-nee-chan even sighed and said, "Sumeragi Clan who has been protecting Japan from spiritual side since far past. You, the thirteenth head of Sumeragi Family who has been standing as the top of onmyoji whose number has been reduced like protected species, his childhood dream is to be a zookeeper... I can't even make a gag for that" with Subaru still blushing at how embarassing that dream 😭😭😭 this whole scene

But Hokuto also asked what will he do with his current job. Subaru said he will keep doing it, but if he can find someone who is far stronger in ability than him, then he will ask him to takeover. He doesn't want to give up his dream no matter how long it will take.

Boy... You really shattered my heart into pieces by allowing me rereading this painful scene, especially when I remember what happen to you later. What is heart anyway? Has been losing it since I started CLAMPism in my life.

Anyway.

Hokuto confirmed again that if Subaru wants to go to veterinarian major and HE CUTELY SMILED. I give up 😭✋ he goes extra cute whenever he talks about his dream.

Then Hokuto said, "Subaru, since before, is a honest and good child, but you are also a blockhead" and she smiled happily for him too. Supportive sis Hokuto 😭 If only you didn't (beeped). She also said she will support him so he should do his best.

She even created a newest version of a shoujo manga, from Onmyoji x Serial Killer to Zookeeper x Veterinarian romance story. I would choose the second one. But Subaru commented that their obaa-chama (I still can't at Subaru called Obaa-chama with Obaa-chan... Like it's so out of character... Like it's so not Subaru who is ALL POLITE TO ANYONE except Hokuto so him actually calling Obaa-chama with Obaa-chan feels so wrong... anyway,) said that not all people with Sakurazuka surname is related to Sakurazukamori.

Yeah. Not if they aren't onmyojis. But that Sakurazuka you know understood high-level techniques you used, boy. Red flag as usual 🚩🚩

AND GOOD THING IS.

Subaru said that "such a kind Seishiro-san wouldn't be a serial killer" and Hokuto said, "yes, he looks kind, but... It's still questionable if he is truly kind."

Hokuto said she can only do basic techniques, right? Of course, she is so down-to-Earth that she won't reveal her actual abilities.

Just as Subaru is about to question what Hokuto means, the phone rang and Hokuto helped Subaru prepare his clothes. Subaru told Hokuto to call the school that he couldn't come to supplementary class because of job. And I don't know, Subaru smiled, but it seemed like he was sad of the fact that he couldn't go to school as well...

Hokuto-nee-chan to the save! She immediately hugged her brother and told him, that she will be with him, so whatever happen, don't ever give up his dream.

That's a nice advice over there and indeed, Subaru took that advice to his heart------but for a certain different dream. What dream is it? Read X.

No No NO but seriously I was like... Subaru is a geniune 16 years old who had a normal dream of being a zookeeper because he likes animals 🥺 and everything that happened in his life; being born with an ability to interact with spirit, onmyoji, and even the head of Sumeragi family; it suddenly feels so cruel... He has a heavy burden in his shoulders, and the only person he actually allowed to see his young, teenager side is only his sister, Hokuto... (and to some extend, Sei-chan)...

It's sad...

Okay, move aside your sadness because that's not the end of the wheel of foreshadowing in this chapter.

Subaru went to the meeting place, which name I can't read because the Kanjis are too small but I will make an effort to read it one day, and he looked here and there until he heard a bell. He looked at where the bell is and touched someone's shoulder accidentally. He apologized for it and someone familiar talked to him in Kyoto dialect...

OBAA-CHAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 😍😍😍😍

Not on story side, but Obaa-chama's clothings? That full-bucked kimono that probably weigh more than 10 kilograms? So gorgeous and beautiful 😭

Cough.

Subaru asked why she didn't tell him that she is coming to Tokyo and he will come for her, but she told him that, when she visited the Imperial Household Agency in Tokyo, the head of Intelligence and Research Cabinet told her that he has a request to Subaru, so she passed it along to him. She also said she has something she needs to tell Subaru.

They first talked about the job. Obaa-chama asked if Subaru is aware of the rise of cult religion groups and Subaru said yes. The Ministry of Education had a request for Intelligence and Research Cabinet to look at one of those groups. Subaru wondered why the Ministry of Education requested a research towards it. Obaa-chama said while it's not strange for Intelligence Cabinet to conduct an investigation towards cult religions, particularly, this one religion group's members are middle and high schoolers. Since the members are students, Intelligence Cabinet had limitation on how much they can investigate the internal. They want to ask Subaru, who is a high-schooler, to help them with the investigation.

Before continuing, I want to note something first. When you search about Japan, you will probably come across an article that say Japan's religion is Shinto or Buddhist, but in fact, Japan is not a religion country. Of course, there are Buddhist practices in the temples or Masses conducted in churches, but there has been no official religion in Japan, and so, most Japanese doesn't have religion, or musukkyo. People don't recognize themselves with a religion there, and I bet when Subaru was asked what religion he adopted, he would be confused, except those who actually realized that religion is be a part of their life and baptised out of their own will.

Then, cult religions appearing in Japan is not uncommon. Rather than religion, I would like you all to think it as a cult. They gathered and did practices just like a religion, but it's their teachings which is questionable. Because of this, Japan's government would keep an eye at newly appeared cults and if they started to create a problem, the government wouldn't just stay still and watch. So, please keep in mind about this!

Back to the topic,

Obaa-chama asked if there is nothing change, and he said he and Hokuto are living just fine.

Obaa-chama revealed that during their monthly fortune reading, she read Subaru's fortune. Then Subaru asked what's the result, and Obaa-chama said...

Subaru-san will be abducted by 'sakura'.

I want to put a meme for this fortune reading but the panel? The high-detailed page picturing Subaru being in the middle of cherry blossoms, seeming to be getting lost in it? Pretty beautiful. Need appreciation.

The line?

Those who didn't know TB ending: HMMMM first it's Hokuto, now it's Obaa-chama???? Is Subaru going to be taken away by Seishiro?

Those who know TB ending: Grandma I love you but it fucking hurts 😭

(Honestly at this point if you don't think Seishiro is sus, please reread volume 1 to 3 and tell me why you don't think he is a walking danger?)

Oh, fun fact. That hard-looking Kanji used in that line, 攫う (sarau), has several meanings, which is: to carry off, to run away with, to kidnap, to abduct, to monopolize, to make one's own. Since it is written in passive verb, if we took Seishiro as the subject of the sentence, then we can get the meaning "Seishiro is going to monopolize/to make Subaru as his own."

Pretty interesting.

Subaru was confused. Sakura? Obaa-chama asked Subaru again to never take off his gloves and she said, "that time, if I don't let you waiting for me alone, if I didn't let you alone..."

Subaru-san can't be abducted by sakura. Please, don't ever let sakura take away your heart.

Obaa-chama, he is this close 👌 of having his heart being taken away by a certain sakura, so don't worry. He will not be okay. *cries in the corner*

Scene shifted, and we returned to Hashimoto. Now, they were having PE class and the teacher told Hashimoto to join the game or she won't get a score for this class. The girls purposely attacked her with ball and one even broke his nose.

The teacher helped her to wake up, but he said "if there is an injured student during PE, they will finish him during the meeting". Hashimoto, who heard it, was shocked in silence. WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU SENSEI!? Damn I have so much question to the people in this school.

Hashimoto cried in the park alone as she asked someone to save her, and a certain fishy woman appeared in front of her. The woman offered her handkerchief, but instead, she wiped her tears. She told Hashimoto that she can tell her anything, but Hashimoto didn't say anything, so she guessed that she is bullied. She said she understands the heart of people who is suffering. It's the power that God gave to her. Hmmm... Okay...? Fishy enough.

Hashimoto then when to the cult religion which Obaa-chama actually mentioned, MS Research Institution, and this fishy woman told her that they want to save her. Hashimoto asked how she is going to save her. This woman then told her to tell her worries.

She then told Hashimoto that she is her ally and she wants to save her. And right outside the window, there is nandarou???

Oh, yes. Vibing in front of a high building? Of course he will look cool like this. And how he comes down again? Using his 😎 vibe probably---I mean he upgraded his skill by standing above a cross in the future, but at this point, he probably also had a fetish for high buildings as well.

We will talk about 😎 later but the next day!

Hashimoto was still bullied at school and she came to the institution again, saying that she is praying like what Kumiko-sensei told her, but nothing changed. The teacher told her that her praying wasn't enough yet, and she should rush for the result, that the day when her prayers will be fulfiled will come. The teacher then introduced Hashimoto to our Subaru, who said that he entered the institution by himself because he wants to learn about it.

Then, Hashimoto looked at Subaru like that and Subaru was panicking 😭😭😭😭 He is not used being stared by a girl other than Hokuto. (or his gaying is showing lol)

Anyway, Subaru started observing things in the classroom and HIS WRISTWATCH HAS A LID??????? Damn boy, talk about rich, or is it the fashion style at that time 😭? Either way, he noticed that it's Friday, but it's still school time (Subaru never attends classes anyway so he is an exception), and whoever he saw is middle school or high school students. He then recalled the information about the research institute.

The institute was built in 1989 with 10,000 members currently. The average age of its members is 16,7 years old. The main institution is in Shinjuku. The institute's purpose wasn't to spread religion teachings, but to purify one's own soul, so there are a lot of differences with other cult religions. There are 20 mentors which is called "teachers", and they guide the students in form of "classroom" just like a cram school. There is no leader, but their greatest teacher is Nagi Kumiko.

As Subaru thought about it, that Kumiko-sensei entered the room and everyone stood up.

And look at how flustered Subaru was!!! Cute cute cute cute cute. He also commented that it really felt like a classroom. Kumiko-sensei introduced herself, and Subaru thought that since his job is to do an investigation, how should he do it?

Meanwhile.

Hokuto came to Seishiro's place and said she comes to make Seishiro a dinner. Seishiro asked what about Subaru and Hokuto said he has a job and she doesn't know when he will come home. Seishiro asked if it's okay for Subaru, because if Hokuto doesn't watch him, he won't eat---someone who will lose himself in his reading. Hokuto said that she already prepared a white stew for Subaru, and she thought that eating alone is boring, so she will prepare Seishiro's meal.

Seishiro asked Hokuto what work he is doing now and when Hokuto told him, his face.

HIS SHOCKED FACE AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA this is honestly the highlight of this chapter, and it's his actual mask that's been falling off.

Seishiro: DID HE REALLY GO TO THAT PLACE ALONE BY HIMSELF, AND TRYING TO MAKE A FRIEND!?

Why did he show that face though? Hmmm... Interesting 🤔🤔

So, that's it for this chapter!

There aren't many things regarding the main problem of this chapter itself, but we got a major touch regarding the main plot of TB. Hokuto actually hinted at Subaru that is it true that Seishiro is kind? and Obaa-chama told Subaru that he is going to be taken away by cherry blossoms, right after what Subaru went through in previous chapter, is pretty interesting.

Let's thing about it. While Subaru established Seishiro as kind in previous chapters as well, right in one chapter before this, we saw him actually doubted who Seishiro is actually. But when Hokuto told him that he is probably different from what Subaru thought, his instinct goes to try to question what Hokuto means. He also elaborately erased the possibility of Seishiro being sakurazukamori when in previous chapter, the reason he doubted Seishiro's kindness is also because he is possibly involved with sakurazukamori due to his knowledge in onmyojutsu and previous events in which he was involved. He was unconsciously realized that Seishiro is somehow alarming, but he decided to subside it, and I think he would never question Seishiro's credibility as sakurazukamori, even with strange stuffs that happened around him, from this chapter onwards.

Also, it's interesting that Obaa-chama already predicted what will happen in near future, that Subaru will be taken away by cherry blossoms, and like I said, he is this 👌 of being taken away by that sakura. But why did she do a fortune reading on Subaru?

Because Subaru ever asked her about Sakurazuka, in the past.

Only several months has passed since volume 2 which happened in November, and since Subaru and Hokuto wore thicker clothes in chapter 4, I guessed that volume 3 happened around December, and chapter is around January or February, thus not many times passed since their last meeting. Obaa-chama also wore thicker kimono here, so I guess this should be around the end of February or beginning of March. Only three or four months passed, so it made sense for her to wonder why her grandson would ask about a Sakurazuka.

Well, there are many confusing things about the timeline, which I will explain later after we get into volume 5.

So, what's your opinion about this new foundings??? Like I said, this is one of my favorite chapters in TB and so much things to talk here! Let's continue in the next part, where things turn pretty interesting 👀

#also seishiro being shocked at the last panel #you two faced 😎😎#tokyo babylon #clamp premium collection #sumeragi subaru #sakurazuka seishirou #sumeragi hokuto

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sylvieserene · 1 year ago

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Ahhhhhhhhh Thank you so much 😭❤

Okay so how I found it is a funny story lol

I found it wayyyy back but didn't have the basic needed resource or idea to find it until very recently.

So there's this Hindi YouTuber called "All Awesome Facts" who primarily makes interesting fact videos or basic information videos on specific series and he made a fact video on this series as well back in 2019. From 1:18 - 1:20 he shared this image

NOW it was also around the time I was revisiting the anime (this series is something I grew up with lol ) and I was scouring the Internet to find the manga and what possibly might have been in it and when I couldn't find it, I got bored and decided to fill my hunger seeing some good ol' fact videos to maybe learn some new tid bit of information and saw this. I was SHOOKETH. Mind you, I have been searching for the manga for a WHILE so when I saw someone post a brief image of what definitely seemed like the real deal of the manga, I became incredibly excited. I instantly commented on the video asking where he got it which garnered some likes yes but the message was altogether ignored by the youtuber.

Back then I had potato of a phone which was a 2015-17 Xiomi model which lagged all the time and had no Google lens so no image searching for me and all typing for me >:(

And even when I desperately searched with redoubled effort considering the youtuber found it which means the pages would have to be out there SOMEWHERE, I simply couldn't find them... And after spending a few more days with constant non stop search, I remember giving up and I think I moved on from the show and forgot out about it due to personal life stresses catching up

So here I am, all these years later with a MUCH BETTER PHONE FOR THE LORD'S SAKE; I returned to the Idaten Jump Fandom once again! I think last year? Around the same time I joined tumblr for the first time, I'm pretty sure. I remember asking about the whereabouts of the manga as one of my first posts lmao but yea scrolling through some of the stuff, I was feeling pretty nostalgic! And a few days ago I think someone brought up something about the manga about how no one has seen a page of the manga, it could have been @idaten-jump (sorry for the ping, buddy) I don't really remember but I think they said it and Idk HOW but some gear in my brain just *clicked* like yk that feeling when you know you are forgetting to remember smth but don't actually do? That happened and I remembered that image I saw years ago and gradually all the heavy hunting I did for it back those years ago. And after much effort, I remembered it was some facts video and it had something to do with the word "Awesome" and blue so I just searched Awesome Facts on YouTube lol

Thankfully he was the second channel that appeared and I instantly recognised the Channel PFP (which fortunately he didn't change) and I searched for the Idaten Jump video with a slight unjustifiable fear of him maybe unlisting or deleting the video off (I have too many bad experiences of that happening so plz don't judge lol) and I found it relatively fast and started watching the video and voila, just like I remembered, there was that manga panel so I screenshot it and quickly ran a Google lens search on it and lemme tell you, it DIDNOT go as expected LMAO

Like Google lens gave me bs no matter HOW I presented my stuff and I was starting to give up again thinking it was some wild goose chase again until I noticed this teeny tiny option

Most of the time I use it, it literally gives me random useless links so I had no hopes since the thing I'm searching for is quite literally a "lost media" and the youtuber could have bought the manga itself for all ik so yea, the hope was lower than room temperature UNTIL THIS SHOWED UP

And boom, I went into the website and it offered 4 sample pages from the manga and that's how I found it 🙏

So there ya have it, my story on how I found it! The website offering it though is giving it for very cheap, if any of you can afford it, I'd say definitely and please go for it! AND SHARE IT ON THE INTERNET LIKE PLEASEEEEE You'd be doing the fandom a huge favour!!!!! It's literally worth some cents if you convert to dollars.

I FOUND 4 PAGES OF THE ACTUAL MANGA

@idaten-jump pinging you just in case tumblr removes this to the abyss

This is the website btw

#idaten jump #manga #origin story #pretty much #so this is basically how I found it #it took so long #but seriously please someone buy it #its not even expensive #infact its cheap af lmao #I tried to order it myself but they cancelled it last minute stating they dont ship to where I live :(#my luck sucks #but you guys please try #compared to other websites selling each volume/issue for an average of $13-$15 this is literal cents #its the best shot we have at making this 'lost' manga a 'found' manga #so please #give it a shot :(

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ootahime · 3 years ago

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analyzing every gojohime moment in the manga 😈

this series will probably have more than one part because tumblr only lets me upload ten images per post </3

warning: there are disgustingly long paragraphs in here and delusions

chapter 32

utahime’s first introduction! akutami lets us know right off the bat that she thinks gojo is an idiot (so true).

chapter 32

i love the contrast between miwa and utahime’s reaction to gojo’s appearance.

chapter 33

NAH BC TELL ME WHY HE WENT OUT OF HIS WAY TO NOT GET HER ONE LMAOOOO!! when he traveled overseas to meet with yuta, he picked up the tribal protection charms and thought to himself, “let’s get enough for the kyoto students as a gift since i am such a great and caring teacher, after all. mmm, i should skip utahime to make her mad~” this guy puts way too much effort into getting on her nerves. his mind = utahime brainrot

chapter 33

she’s laughing at him here because he’s getting disciplined for being a lil shit. i wonder...what would he say if he saw her laughing at him like that?

chapter 33

this interaction between them is a little strange don’t you think? i feel like over the years he’s learned how to pick up her mood based on the way she’s acting towards him. you’re probably thinking, “well any person can figure out how a person’s feeling based on the way they’re talking or acting.” yes, that’s absolutely true, but it’s kind of different with this. she’s acting normal. utahime has a rather indifferent expression on her face and what she says is spoken in a calm tone, but gojo still asks her if she’s mad at him. it’s likely that he knows her well enough to be able to notice these subtle things. even if she wasn’t actually mad at him, he was being considerate for a split second, then he went and said, “of course. i didn’t do anything wrong and all.” what a guy LOLOL. to me, this implies that maybe he made her genuinely angry in the past to the point where he realized that he went too far, and thus decided to be more careful of her feelings. she has definitely gotten annoyed at him so many times after that so whenever she seems angry, he probably asks himself if he took it too far. i’m curious to see if he can pick up if she’s upset with something that’s not involving him. would he console her? how does gojo satoru console someone?

despite him always annoying her, she’s still courteous and brings him a cup of tea during their talk. she didn’t have to go out of her way to get tea for him but she did. that’s the kind of person utahime is. a kind and caring woman who would never put her students in danger. in the anime they were sitting far away and not facing each other like they’re doing in the manga. she also has her own tea cup. i think that little panel of her placing the cup down on the table and him picking it up to take a sip is a nice little detail. it just proves that her hating him most of the time isn’t actually pure hatred but annoyance because of his shenanigans and teasing.

chapter 33

i touched upon this a little bit in my previous post, but i wish to go more in depth about this panel. first of all, he ends the sentence with her name twice. two times too many, mr. gojo. i like how they can be serious with each other too LOL. i wish we got to see them talk about the traitors because they did figure it out together after all. does it always end in bickering? can they interact with each other like adults all the way through? somehow, i feel like that’s not possible when it comes to these two. furthermore, notice how gojo confides in utahime about his suspicions. from what we know, she is the first person he brought it up to. i mean, i guess he has to start investigating the schools and would need extra assistance to save time, but he could have done it himself if he really wanted to. by deciding to ask for her help we know that he thinks she’s trustworthy, smart, and strong enough to face whatever considerable risks this task may entail.

i didn’t point this out in my other posts but see how he makes a hand sign in the last panel when she throws the cup at him? gojo is manually activating his infinity. why though? about a year after the whole star plasma vessel incident happened, gojo develops the ability to keep his infinity up at all times by using the reversed curse technique to consistently heal himself to prevent exhaustion. this means that it really makes no difference whether he leaves it on or off. there are a few times where we can witness someone actually touching gojo. for example, yuuji giving him a hug. did he turn his infinity off, or was it able to deduce that yuuji was not a threat? the erasers and pencils shoko and geto threw at him during his demonstration of his new ability aren’t dangerous normally, but is it the speed that makes them dangerous? even if it did hit him, it wouldn’t hurt. how does the infinity know when to allow an incoming object to touch gojo? i believe it is up to gojo himself to let things touch him; his infinity restricts anything and anyone. some people say it could just be the fact that water is not dangerous to him, so therefore, he has to manually put his infinity up. i thought this was a reasonable explanation as to why he put up the hand sign when the tea was thrown at him, but then i realized that it couldn’t be. remember the second opening? it’s raining and everyone is carrying an umbrella, then it pans to gojo with a bouquet in his hand and rain drops slipping off his infinity. if he DID manually put his infinity up to prevent getting soaked then that implies that he chose to turn his infinity off. you can argue and say that jujutsu high is a safe place with students so there’s no need to have his infinity there, but do you remember when he stepped on the ants in front of gakuganji and yaga? the ants were perfectly fine after which insinuates that his infinity prevented his shoes from crushing the ants. he most likely had his infinity on during the baseball game even though he was in a safe environment. how does this long tangent relate back to utahime? well, it simply indicates that gojo trusts utahime so much to the point where he can be vulnerable around her. turning off his infinity symbolizes completely letting down his guard in a way.

how about what happens next? utahime throws the tea at him, he turns on his infinity to deflect it, and he responds with, “scary! hysteric women aren’t popular, you know!” why would he even say that LMAO?? utahime doesn’t even try to deny what he said either. she just hits him with the good old, “i am your senpai!” could it be that he’s trying to poke fun of her relationship status? maybe, maybe not. doesn’t he like people a lil crazy? he did say that all jujutsu sorcerers have to be a little crazy because they’re willing to put themselves in danger constantly.

chapter 0 p.1

i wonder who he’s thinking of when he said that. could it be utahime? it seems like he’s reminiscing or thinking about someone. he wears an amused expression on his face as he laughs - almost like he’s seen his fair share of how scary women can get :>>

chapter 34

the pattern behind gojo and utahime is called yagasuri “fletching,” a traditional japanese design. this design is inspired by arrow fletching. it's a lucky charm for weddings and other celebrations since it's based on the Japanese belief that an arrow shot once never comes back. brides were given kimonos with this pattern for good luck during the edo era (1603–1868) to ensure they would not have to return to their original family home. this pattern can have numerous meanings such as steadfastness or determination to achieve a goal, or a wish for the happiness of the bride. there is a belief that a bow and arrow represent the fight against evil. honestly, this meaning fits the narrative of the story. utahime and gojo are unearthing the traitors that are feeding intel to the curse users and cursed spirits. they are in the middle while the kyoto students surround them, which could mean that it’s their job as adults to protect these children from the grasps of evil slowly making itself more prominent. do you also notice that the arrows are pointed toward utahime from gojo? from all the images i’ve seen, the arrows are usually pointed downward. what could this mean? is gojo trying to protect her (in the future (?)) or does he have a big fat crush smh...

i think it’s a good time to mention utahime’s clothing. she’s wearing miko attire. miko are shrine maidens who were once thought to be shamans (you connecting the dots?). in their service to shrines, miko used to perform spirit possession and takusen (in which the possessed person acts as a "medium" (yorimashi) to communicate the divine will or message of that kami (god) or spirit; also included in the category of takusen is "dream revelation" (mukoku), in which a kami appears in a dream to communicate its will). this was back in the old days, of course. to become a miko back then (shaman), one needed to have potential. neurosis, hallucinations, odd behavior, and hysteria (HYSTERIA HELLO???) are some of the signs that a person is being called to shamanism. when a miko is communicating with a kami (god) or spirit by acting as a medium, she is in a trance-like state, and so she must learn techniques to control herself when this happens. chanting and dancing were used to accomplish this, so the girl was taught melodies and intonations that were used in songs, prayers, and magical formulas. all of this could give us insight about utahime’s technique and explains why she’s good at singing :) maybe she can’t control herself when she uses her technique which is why she isn’t shown using it because it should be used for dire situations. i imagine being possessed by a spirit or god must consume a lot of cursed energy. it makes sense that utahime and gakuganji wear traditional clothing. they’re the staff of jujutsu high’s kyoto branch. in chapter 0, kyoto is known as the sacred land of jujutsu. it’s more traditional compared to tokyo. if you want to learn more about miko, you should check out the wikipedia page!

chapter 34

i swear he tries to annoy her every chance he gets. i bet he sets a goal for himself to see how many times utahime lectures him about respecting his seniors every time he’s within the same vicinity as her. at least he called her utahime-sensei!!!

chapter 40

this isn’t even a gojohime moment tbh...i just wanted to share a pic of them sitting next to each other HEHE. why are they sitting next to each other anyway? it’s not like they have assigned seating.

----

that was so long and i apologize for the gargantuan paragraphs you guys had to read through. i’m writing this at 4 in the morning and i’m feeling borderline delirious so i apologize if there are any errors. i’ll edit this when i have time <3

the next part should come shortly.

#gojohime #gouta #gojo x utahime

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tonguetiedraven · 2 years ago

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Why do you always defend Ryuji during the impure king arc? He treated Rin terribly!

I'm going to come at this from the pov that you actually want to know and aren't just trying to bait me.

So...

This is one of my favorite panels (it's from chapter 34.)

It's rare to get a group shot with everyone (even Takara) and it's fun because everyone is going casual. (Also Renzou's side eye always gets me speculating. Yukio or Izumo? Who is he staring at? Is that an Illuminati foreshadowing? I have so many questions, lol.)

Now, something I always notice (partly because he's my fave, and partly because I use it in fics a lot) the only one with any visible wounds is *drumroll* Ryuuji. Bandage on his cheek and lip.

Funny thing about that? He didn't get it in the fight. Nope. That's from Rin. The only visible injury on any of them was one Rin gave them.

Is that fair to say when Yukio also decked the hell out of Rin, and Yukio got his ass kicked by Toudou? Nope. That bandage disappears and reappears through chapter 34 (Kato's human and sometimes forgets to draw things in) but still, the only one of the students to be shown with a wound is Ryuuji. That he got from Rin. Which I think is a big thing.

Now, the Kyoto arc is a big deal for me because it's basically Ryuuji's arc, and if it wasn't obvious, he's my fave, lol. But I think that the anime season-- which I dearly love -- also leads to people making a lot of incorrect assumption about the exwires&Yukio (minus Izumo because of the bus scene.)

and I don't particularly think the anger that group gets is at all warranted. I've gone to bat for Yukio about all of that, and I'm all too happy to explain why I don't think Ryuuji was in the wrong for that arc. (Not to say Rin is either. I'll get to that.)

First thing first. Ryuuji is the only child of Tatsuma Suguro, the master of the Myodha. They are a Buddhist sect of exorcist monks that were united when Ryuuji's ancestor defeated the Impure King. When Ryuuji was a baby, Satan murdered a lot of people in the sect. By the time he was about ten, they'd lost more than 2/3rds of the monks in his order, the temple was considered to be bad luck and everyone in it was ostracized by the community. There was no escaping that kind of constant look down. At that point, his father decided to join True Cross, which a lot of monks looked at as a betrayal of their core beliefs. A Catholic presenting organization? Blasphemous! They lost even more members.

They were forced to confirm to True Crosses restrictions/protocal and get meisters --but Tatsuma did not get any. At that same point Tatsuma stopped putting a lot of effort into the temple and started to go to bars and clubs and things, and get a terrible reputation as a drunk womanizer. (We the viewer know this is because of Karura, but Ryuuji doesn't learn that until much, much later. For Karura to work, Ryuuji had to believe his father was the dead beat he pretended to be.)

Ryuuji, who deeply loves his people, saw all this happening and got more loyal to his people and more determined to make them as powerful as they had once been. He grew to resent his father and the shameful life he led, and went to True Cross to get his meisters without Tatsuma's permission. In fact, he was ordered not to go. He went to the Academy with the intention to not return until he had been licensed, and then only to start working at the Deep Keep and eventually take over the Temple duties.

Now, for my anime only peeps, there are a few key scenes they cut out for time (or something. I don't know. I didn't plot the anime out, lol.)

One: While Koneko is in the hospital for the arm Amaimon broke, he lectures Bon about how reckless he was to run into the forest after Rin. That he is the heir of the Myodha and that he can't be reckless. While that is happening, Renzou brings news that the Deep Keep (the True Cross office connected to the Myodha temple) was attacked and that Renzou's father and Ryuuji's father were there and probably hurt.

Two: The train scene goes down differently than the anime. They have an argument about Rin's flames, Rin ignites and gets in Ryuuji's face, and Ryuuji is surprised he isn't burned, but before any further convo can happen, Shura makes them spend the rest of the train ride with Bariyons.

So by the time they get to Kyoto, Ryuuji, who has seen Rin use his flames twice now when he was angry -- and likely has realized he's been using them all along and has yet to see Rin do anything like control them -- chooses to more or less not interact with Rin for a while. He is immediately pulled away from the group to get extra debriefings (benefit of being the bocchan) and learns that one of the people he's devoted his entire life to are likely a traitor.

Meanwhile you have Rin -- not knowing any of the stress and drama going on, but able to tell that everyone is stressed because no one in the Myodha is good at pretending they aren't stressed to hell and back -- trying to get his friends back. He's always around, always trying to start convos, and when he isn't doing that, he's up on the roof, failing to light his candles properly and clearly annoying Shura with it.

Ryuuij's next interaction after the train is to tell Rin to shut up when Rin is following him and won't leave him alone. He takes the bento and storms off and finds out more about traitors and is still not allowed to find or talk to his dad. (And it is hilarious that Rin got to have a convo with Tatsuma while Ryuuji hasn't and he would be so annoyed about that if he knew, lol.)

They then don't really see each other --yeah there was breakfast but they're both hungover and not really talking -- until the break in at the Deep Keep.

This is THE KEY moment in the struggle, in my opinion. This is the core of their problems, and it happens because neither one bothered to ask what the other one was going through. Both boys react in an entirely reasonable manner to what they know/believe.

Ryuuji has no idea that Shirou died and that Rin was there, and that Rin considers it entirely his fault. None of the exwires do. I don't even think Yukio knows most of the details there.

Rin has no idea how neglectful Tatsuma has been, or what any of Ryuuji's issues with him are. He just sees Ryuuji yelling at his father without hearing why he's yelling. So Rin intervenes and tries to get them to make up -- because he knows how much it hurts to have your dad die and your last words be hurtful.

But at this point, Tatsuma can't apologize and he needs Ryuuji to think the worst of him because honestly, Karura is a little trouble making bitch and forget the Impure King, he was the big bad of this arc, lol. (The contract Tatsuma has with him requires him living a double life. Karura feeds off lies and mistrust.)

So Ryuuji, who at this point is trying to come to terms with this boy he really thought he knew being nothing at all what he thought, who has seen him failing to control his flames over and over again, is now being lectured by someone he knows doesn't understand anything about his relationship with his dad. He writes Rin's words off and tells Tatsuma to get lost anyway because it's clearly all his dad seems to want to do. His temple is crumbling around him and Tatsuma is the only one who can intervene, and as far as Ryuuji can see, he just won't, and he can't keep fighting to get his dad to fix it.

Tatsuma does go, and even if Ryuuji doesn't show it, that hurts because Ryuuji really did idolize his dad and really just wants his dad to take back over the temple and fix everything.

Rin yells at him that he isn't cool, and starts to ignite. Bon doesn't react to that until Rin is charging him, then he reacts by summoning a shield that Rin breaks through before grabbing him by his collar and yelling. Rin decks him so hard during this fight that he flies across the room. So hard that he is the only one of the group bandaged during the Kyoto Tower trip.

Ryuuji doesn't get Rin off him. Nope. Juuzou jumps between them to save Bon, who he genuinely believes to be in grave danger. Ryuuji just watches the entire thing happen in a kind of shock.

Rin once again displays to Ryuuji that he is not in control.

And with that in his mind, while he's icing his swollen cheek, Ryuuji hears that the boy he trusted, the boy that was lying during all their friendship (he doesn't know Rin was told to lie, and he doesn't know if he can trust anything Rin has said about himself because once someone shows that something they said was a lie, it's hard to know if other things were a lie too) the boy who has now shown on three separate occasions that he wasn't in charge of himself and very dangerous for that lack of control-- is in imminent danger of being executed and he immediately goes to help him. He finds out about his father and that most of the stuff he's believed his entire life was in fact a lie, and he still gets Rin free and still goes to help.

The Kyoto Arc is Ryuuji dealing with the fact that everything he believed might not be true. It deals with him having the things he thought were foundational torn away and still striving forward. It has him deciding to trust his friends and pushing past his own prejudices and assumptions to grow even when it seems like it won't make any difference. It has him offering to sacrifice himself for his friends and family and ends with him, bandaged cheek and all, going on an outing with his friends to places he's never even seen, damaged, changed, but better for it all.

So yes. I absolutely support Ryuuji in this arc and every other arc. He's a wonderfully written character -- like all of Kato's characters -- and he follows his gut and morals and expects everyone else to do the same. He never asks anyone to do something or give something he isn't willing to, and he didn't (in my opinion) treat Rin 'horribly' at any point. He told him his flames were dangerous, he was shocked that the son of Satan had just been chilling with the other students like he couldn't ignite, and he mostly just tried to not interact with Rin because he had a lot of other shit he was dealing with and Rin was just not that big of a priority for him to figure out at that time. Ryuuji was a HUGE priority for Rin, because getting his friends trust back was his only real goal in that arc until the Impure King stuff happened, but it wasn't the same for Ryuuji.

So yeah. Ryuuji wasn't wrong and he wasn't right. He was just doing his best with what information he had, and he made adjustments when he got new info.

And at the end of the day, he's a great character. A character doesn't have to be correct or always in the right to be great. I think aoex has a lot of great characters, and some of them are very much on the 'wrong' side. You don't have to like Ryuuji. You can think he's just a bully and it really won't change anything. I shall keep writing about him and all the other characters because it's fun and they're wonderful to create stories for.

Hope that helps!

#bon suguro #ryuuji suguro #ryuji suguro #ao no exorcist #blue exorcist #aoex #ane #aoe #i could gush about these characters forever #i love them all #and they're all so complicate #and their reactions are so real #and they act like broken and damaged humans #and it's fantastic #kato is brilliant

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nanakah · 3 years ago

Text

about Ishigami, his growth and Miko's role

most people, myself included, thought at some point that Tsubame's rejection (or acceptance) could wrap up Ishigami's arc and even his past's flashbacks neatly, but Osaragi's arc suddenly revealing there was more to his relationship with Miko made me reflect more and think nah...if anything we're halfway there. It also showed glimpses of him already struggling to find his place in the world by quitting his clubs, even though he was successful at them and there was no Ootomo incident yet to undermine his self-image.

It seemed odd that despite everything he went through he still has his "hair=shield/averting eyes" theme going strong, but it makes sense if you consider even though Tsubame helped him see the way to be more accepting of people and cleared his name, his self-esteem still is super low. I spoke of this in my "sutera" meta, but to Ishigami, his life still has been a sucession of failures and almosts. At his core, he still hasn't fully opened up to people or learned to use his vulnerabilities to his advantage.

If I have grabbed your interest thus far, keep reading for more considerations!

Tsubame is kind to anyone and attempted to do good for him, but ultimately he was never fully himself around her, nor she tried/he alllowed her reaching out to the deepest parts of his insecurities. She doesn't show her own flaws to him either and to this day we get the feeling we don't know her well, just the best parts that Ishigami wanted to see. Kaguya, Miyuki and Chika contribute a lot in a sibling-like way, but there's a limit to how much Kaguya in particular can inspire him. Miko however, has scratched a little beneath the surface and has expressed an interest in helping him with that, even if he himself is still avoiding the topic. She's also more relatable to him in the sense that the rest of the stuco has a history of successes in their lives, while he was able to watch Miko's hardships and failures closely. Their panic attacks even look similar and they're always watching the other to provide backup (in a very roundabout way, at least before) when they happen.

While their personalities are fundamentally different, his arc and struggles remind me a lot of Miyamura from Horimiya and today, as I was musing on what is so different about them as of now, I believe it's how Miyamura didn't have a single *traumatic* mistake to get over, so he goes down his development road much faster. Putting it another way, it's ultimately that Ishigami hasn't yet learned to be kind to himself like Miyamura has through Hori. Like Shirogane and Kaguya are through themselves. In Miyamura's case, sympathizing with how Hori despite her strong exterior can be very fragile inside but still support him (fight for him, defend him, accept his true self, not judge him, hear him, make him feel good enough) made him feel compelled to grow stronger to protect her back.

Miko as she was at the beggining of the story couldn't provide Ishigami this sort of stability (and that's where Osaragi's "prettier story"/"you weren't there for him" reasoning fails) even if deep down she wanted to, but now after making many mistakes, learning from them and becoming more flexible, she absolutely can. Both Ishigami and Miko have deeply rooted issues that took them more than just each other to flesh out and develop, but they're very much the missing puzzle piece the other needs.

Miko still very much has room for growth as well, mainly concerning finding a middle ground between her "bad girl" and "good girl" personas that Ishigami can easily see through, as demonstrated by the consolation chapter. She tried being "bad", she attempted lying but was still saying half-truths, because her love of justice isn't just out of parental abandonment issues or loneliness - she does believe them sincerely. The moment Ishigami headpated her and shared genuine, spot-on words of concern and admiration (thus a hint of fondness), it was all over for her trying to keep up the love-warfare upper hand.

That's not actually new - Ishigami has always demonstrated he was able to see glimpses of her true self, be it teasing how she's an otaku or a closet pervert and such, he never fully bought the strait-laced image she aspired to make real. But it did take him being around her more to see she could be sweet to him and as he puts it, that smiling more is not a bad look on her. Miko says to Osaragi your true self only comes through interacting with others, so given how lonely she has always been (and how the one person close to her - Osaragi - was actually keeping things between them superficial because of her own problems), it's no surprise she's only finding out now who she is. Ishigami can help Miko find a better compromise of good/bad after both not following any rules at all for so long and recently learning that hard work can pay off. Miko immersing herself in his hobby will clash with her rigid study schedule sooner or later, and he'll know how to help her with that better than anyone else.

On the other hand, Ishigami's moral compass, romanticism (love for flowers, planing dates etc) and idealism aren't things he is proud of...yet. He protects himself with layers of cynism, especially in his first appearances, but he is always being contradictory and letting it slip how idealistic/pure he is at heart. He also is only now learning to like his outward image with things like fitness/studying and finding out it's not like he never cared about it - it's just that he was scared shitless of failure, thus never even tried hard in the first place to avoid being hurt. And as I have advocated for in the Sutera post, I expect Miko in some level to help him come to terms with seeing good in himself. Heck, even being able to game with her now and showing off how good he is and having her appreciate it is gonna do wonders to make him feel more "adequate". Tsubame's arc had a lot of him changing himself to become "better", but Miko on the other hand is trying to put herself in HIS shoes to maybe go "hey, I like you as you are. I'm trying to understand you more and put effort in for you".

Ishigami and Miko start out watching out for each other behind their backs - which instead of helping their relationship, drives them further apart because they think the other side is showing no appreciation. As the story progresses, they're slowly learning to make each other more aware of their support, and it is making them open up more in general.

They have a strong belief the other wants to be rescued and there is truth in that. Both want help and to be recognized for their efforts, but won't cry out for it. In the unplugged earbuds chapter Ishigami takes it upon himself to protect Miko's reputation in spite of himself, the election arc has him actually putting effort into the campaign just for the sake of protecting her and at first posing as a rival of hers to Shirogane only to reveal he's trying to "make Miko smile", he is constantly fending off men from interacting with her as protection (while also sounding jealous), he was way more protective of her when she was wearing that cast than needed and is now being able to openly headpat her and sounds almost like her "soothing sounds" from the days of yore lol Sure Tsubame seems like his start to becoming "a better man", but all the way back on the election, it was for Miko's sake that we first SEE him putting effort into *anything* without being coerced by anyone to take action.

And while it's more discreet compared to Ishigami's "white knight" attitude, Miko also tries hard to protect him - cheering him on during the sports festival race and wanting to console him before the stuco intervened, telling him he should study (but he thinks it's just nagging), christmas (which I'll elaborate bellow), making sure he was able to graduate middle school by actually confronting school staff and, of course, their very first meeting as recently revealed.

Many people hated the entirety of Osaragi's arc, but 232 gave very juicy info indeed. Ishigami's reason for supporting Miko from the shadows comes from admiration AND part gratitude for her attempting to talk to him and listen to what troubles him, and seeing they actually had a "falling out" argument was game changing.

He looks sad and troubled to have shut her down there, not simply angry, and so does she (there's tears in her eyes when her face is shown in the next page) - despite her black and white sense of justice at this point of the story, she still wanted to listen to him. And even after that outburst she still believed the rumors weren't real, unlike Osaragi sees it - otherwise she wouldn't have made the effort for him to be able to move on to high school. Why would she care, if she truly hated him and thought he was in the wrong?

If any further proof was needed at all that this info is important, I'm happy to say we have more. I noticed the Christmas stairs scene mirrors this exact falling out moment: "Go away"/"Suit yourself"

But this time Miko had already decided to change, had already seen the mess their relationship became the last time she did not reach out to him and thus already had their previous falling out in mind - meaning she decides to chase after him.

I don't like how the scanlations handled this scene because reading the japanese raws, my interpretation was that Miko was sounding "annoying" because she was still kinda drunk/unfiltered and freaking out when talking to Ishigami, not outright berating him like the Jaimini's box translation made it look like. She also sounds too angry after the fall, so I generally thought Viz's version (the panel shown above) was closer to the original.

"I always have to take care of you! You keep putting youself in danger. You can't make it on your own." is a better translation than Jaimini's, and also parallels better what Ishigami is often telling Miko as well (That she keeps putting herself in danger and that he has to be around to keep her in check). But with 232 in mind, I think it misses a nuance of the original line: "ほんとあんたは私が居ないと危なっかしく駄目ね" - "Honto anta wa watashi ga inaito abunakkashiku dame ne" - while I'm a novice at japanese studies, gathering from what I can read and trying to get a feel of the whole sentence, it's closer to "So it really is dangerous to you if I'm not there/ It's no good if I'm not around you". You can take that as her being full of herself, which is the route Jaimini's goes ("You'd be screwed without me") but that's too hostile - Viz's got the spirit of wanting to protect him better, but the original has an implication that she has "tested not being there"/failed being there before (due to not fully siding with him in middle school) that's absent elsewhere.

IMO the reason Ishigami's "closed his eyes" arc is not over yet is because he hasn't accepted or gotten over or fully learned from his past yet, he simply shut it down. That's why briefly during the sports festival his eyes are in plain view, then go back to their usual for the balloon gag. I'm not sure if Ootomo herself will make a comeback, may or may not - regrets are regrets and sometimes the only solution to them is letting them stay in the past. But the topic of how he saw Miko in middle school and the letter certainly are being set up to still show up in the story.

If I compare him to Miyamura again, he'd still be at the point before Miyamura's haircut - not wanting to face the parts of himself he doesn't like, not quite ready to change. Not quite ready to patch up his own wounds yet and instead silencing everything from his past.

In this sense, Miko does wonders to make him feel more confident even if he hasn't realized it yet, and she's always dropping little hints she'd like him to worry about his future not in a naggy way, but because she genuinely prays for his success. He unconsciously wants Miko to think well of him and it fills him with confidence and a more prideful image of himself he doesn't really display to anyone else, not even Tsubame - like his usages of "ore" (a more manly/confident way of addressing himself) around her (AND HER ALONE):

( I don't like the available translations to the staircase scene either, lol. Zaibatsu has conveyed the tone of the second scene up there perfectly. For the staircase line, I've seen "I'll be there to catch you" and "I'll save you" which are contextually correct, but to me the original "俺が絶対守る" - "I (ore) will absolutely protect you" carries a much more romantic nuance or ambiguity, regardless of him realizing it at that point. It's like, the title to one of the most romantic moments/songs in the CCS Clear card anime ost, for instance. OF COURSE MIKO LOVES HIM. The narrator doesn't overexplain or take apart Ishimiko's interactions like for Prezguya, but all the evidence needed is there. And I gotta add the very next chapter to the staircase one is the "eternal love" x "real love" I'm super fond of that says fate is irrelevant and to find real love you must use your head to realize/understand things, so makes the romantic subtext even greater.)

This whole affair is also making me open my eyes that I should try to study japanese more...of course I'm happy to have translations and scanlators working hard, but there is something inherently lost in adaptations because it robs you of connecting with the author's intentions unless it was the author who wrote the translation in the first place

Thinking back on Ishigami's early "i wanna die/i'm going home/don't look at me" role, it seems unbelievable we're at the point he's now able to directly confront a "stranger" (lololol) or make serious promises with so much confidence.

PLEASE DON'T END SO SOON MANGA, I NEED MORE.

( off-topic kind of, but i'm lazy to make a separate post just for it: Since I mentioned things lost in translation, I saw something on Discord about Ishigami having an unreliable narrator moment in the "compliments" chapter/Iino Miko cannot love part 4 and holy molly, it is true. He first says something akin to "You're just too beautiful" out of context, Miko HEARS IT - and that's why she looks so shocked before asking for clarification - and he DID SAY IT in the speech bubble, but after she's nice to him and he thinks back to what he said he adds a "Your handwriting is just too beautiful" to his flashback. I'm ONTO HIM. ONTO HIM I SAY. It is what he meant, but it's like his mouth betrayed him. Whether it's unconscious or denial...it totally is something. The scanlation completely skips this and had the same line both times it's mentioned.)

#kaguya-sama #kaguya-sama spoilers #meta #ishigami yu #yu ishigami #ishimiko #it's ishigami focused but i'd be a dirty liar to say i'm not at least a lil bit biased #longpost #spoilers #yes i am an overthinker and overanalyzer did u notice #horimiya spoilers #yeah i kinda mentioned miyamura lol #i'm not even procrastinating anything this time i just rly care for them #kaguya-sama meta #this is a clown here that procrastinated 3 months to write a thesis but is churning out meta after meta for manga #plz forgive typos i'm still lazy to spellcheck this one lol #ishiino #ishigami using ore again to invite miko to the dance makes this post qualify for fridge brilliance now

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captnjacksparrow · 4 years ago

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So does Kishi officially hate NH and SS? Because I can't help but think like that when I see them in Boruto. Like no way he wants them to be seen as happy or content. Also, it seems like he still hates Sakura because just just look at her, she hasn't really changed. Her dynamic with Sasuke hasn't really changed. She gives chase, Sasuke ignores. Except Sasuke looks more depressed.

Hey, after fifteen years of us chasing after the story and characters we invested in so much, at least give us some indication that they are least happy after sooo many sacrifices, like they deserve that happiness.

But no, if anything, they seem totally miserable. What made Kishi do that? Yes, he can't show them ooc, but Sasuke marrying Sakura is already ooc. Naruto being a bad father is already ooc. Like why go to the extent of showing Sasuke trying not to touch Sakura and pointedly showing that they never kissed? That's just like a determined effort on Kishi's part to show that their marriage is not working. Naruto works way more than any of his predecessors and sleeps in the office or couch so as not to disturb Hinata, when Hinata is specifically designed to accommodate anything that Naruto might require.

Don't get me wrong, I think Boruto is trash. But I am still in interested in SNS in Boruto because that's still canon. Just makes me wonder how Kishi will finally conclude SNS, because their bond still shows clearly in Boruto. Do you think he will kill them any time soon?

Good ask, Anon☺️☺️❤️❤️

Before answering this, I am going to tell you that I don’t watch Boruto. But I know what happened so far, vaguely. Like, Gaiden arc, Karma seal, Kawaki adoption, Kurama’s death, loss of Rinnegan, Time travel arc. Anyways, I might have missed many interactions between Sasuke & Sakura in the filler episodes or other canonical episodes. I would be happy If you send me an episode list or timestamps in where they interact, so that it saves my time instead of me, watching that entire shit show.

So does Kishi officially hate NH and SS?

In this post, I dissected SS from a non-SNS perspective. It seems Kishi went all out of his way to make their interactions too insincere, blunt and toxic. I mean Sasuke’s absolute lack of interest in her was very evident even until chapter 693. That is right before, their final VoTE fight. And even after Sakura comes to heal their injuries, he just said ‘Ummmm..... I guess Sorry’...

Kishi could have made Sasuke say some corny shit to Sakura like how he felt bad inside for hurting her, how he missed her, wiping her tears or whatever (Puke!!!! 🤮🤮🤮). Because in the previous chapter, Sasuke basically confessed to Naruto internally about how he felt about Naruto when he was a child. Kishi could have done the same for Sakura in just 4, 5 panels. But anyways, my point is, Kishi’s moment to salvage that ship is chapter 699.

But he didn’t.

Did Kishi tried to build their bond after marriage?

He definitely could’ve. But he didn’t.

This shows his clear distaste in SS.

As for NH, Kishi is indifferent. He neither hates them nor loves them. Kishi created Hinata as a pairing fodder and she still is.

Also, it seems like he still hates Sakura because just just look at her, she hasn't really changed. Her dynamic with Sasuke hasn't really changed. She gives chase, Sasuke ignores. Except Sasuke looks more depressed.

Hmmm, I don’t know whether Sasuke hates her, anon. Again, maybe I’ve missed those parts. But when he looks at her, it’s always filled with regrets and an urge to avoid her (like Itachi avoided Sasuke, but for totally sad and genuine reasons).

But this again begs the question, ‘Why feeling regret or hesitant even after 12 years?’.

Believe me anon, Love/Bonds/Understanding can happen at anytime of your life. From where I come from, not everyone marries out of love. Arranged marriages are common. But still, many couples make effort and work out their difference, and find love. Kishi could’ve done the same for SS too.

Is Sasuke that heartless? No.

He was once a boy who bear hugged his brother every time Itachi comes back from the Academy. Itachi’s presence itself made Sasuke so happy.

Did he become heartless after the massacre? Also no.

Even after the trauma, Sasuke just became aloof and cold. But he always becomes a child who can pout, be silly, becomes animated, bicker around Naruto. So, he can be lovely, but only around the people he choose by himself.

Still, Sakura is not that person. So, he looks like he is depressed and wants to escape from her at any given chance because of a certain guilt.

What made Kishi do that? Yes, he can't show them ooc, but Sasuke marrying Sakura is already ooc. Naruto being a bad father is already ooc. Like why go to the extent of showing Sasuke trying not to touch Sakura and pointedly showing that they never kissed? That's just like a determined effort on Kishi's part to show that their marriage is not working.

To answer, this goes way back, anon.

Kishi is a person who prefers to write love through intense friendship, sensei-student dynamics and brotherhood. He can occasionally write cute and sweet romance but it can only be short like 2 or 3 pages... or a chapter, max. He can’t go on doing it for 70 chapters for romance. Which was evident from Minato & Kushina, Dan & Tsunade, Obito & Rin.

But the real deal of Naruto manga is the bond between Naruto and Sasuke. The bond between Itachi and Sasuke also played a huge role in this series. And then comes Hashirama and Madara, Jiraiya and Naruto, Kakshi and Obito, Kakashi and Naruto and many more. So, Kishi pretty much gave an ending he wanted for a long time in chapter 699. He successively pulled off a great manga without corny and shitty romance but with just friendship and brotherhood alone. He didn’t give two shits about NH or SS before chapter 700.

Naruto series’ another success lies on it’s characters tragic backstories. I simply loved them all and most of them made me cry.

Kishi wanted to move on from Naruto.

But then Money played a big part. Naruto series can be milked in a lot of ways. Editors wanted all the characters to become some baby making dolls. So you have to create pairings. Based on the popularity polls, they decided NH and SS.

In my opinion, Sasuke is a goal-oriented person. He is a wanderer who works on his own accords. Ever since he left Konoha when he was 13, that was his path, so you can’t make him stay in one place. At every stage of his life, he had different goals.

At age 8-15, he had one goal. To kill Itachi. Can he have a romance here? Nope.

At age 16, his goal is to destroy Konoha. No chance of romance in that dark path.

At age 17, he wanted to Revolutionize the shinobi system. Since he wanted to be alone for that goal, no possibility of romance.

At age 18, he adopted Naruto’s dream as his own. To make all shinobi cooperate and look out for Kaguya remains. Romance cannot happen here as he was constantly wandering around and he prefers to work alone.

This is how Kishi designed Sasuke’s character throughout.

Now all of a sudden, if you ask Kishi to go OOC by asking him to write corny romance for his favorite character Sasuke just for the sake of making him relevant to Boruto series, what will he do?

Since Boruto is a series which is a sequel to Naruto, you pretty much know everyone’s backstory. Those 12 year old New Gen kids possibly can’t have tragic stories like Naruto or Sasuke.

Kishi being a troller, used this opportunity to create a piss poor sob story for Sarada by making Sasuke as an absentee father and an unloving husband.

He created a sad story for Sarada and he gets to shit on SS ship. Two birds, One stone!!!!

Now, Sasuke being an unloving husband is OOC ? Nope. He was never a marriage material in the first place. So he is perfectly in-character.

Sasuke being an absentee father is OOC? No and Yes. No, because it’s the effect of the cause I mentioned above. Yes, because unlike Naruto, Sasuke once had a father. He can try to reach her out now and often. but he prefers not to do instead he cares more about Boruto. LOL.

Sasuke being not family oriented is OOC? Nope. He is a goal oriented person. His goal is same as Naruto’s dream. He will go to any extent to fulfill it, even at the expense of his family’s happiness. Because that’s what he learnt from Itachi. What Itachi taught him was, even at the expense of his own happiness and Sasuke’s trauma, he preferred Konoha and Shinobi World’s peace. That’s what Sasuke is doing now.

Naruto works way more than any of his predecessors and sleeps in the office or couch so as not to disturb Hinata, when Hinata is specifically designed to accommodate anything that Naruto might require.

As for Naruto,

I think it’s very funny. And I guess, I know why.

Just like Sasuke, Naruto is also a goal oriented person.

Remember, in that Boruto movie, Sasuke knocks Naruto’s door at the midnight?

Imagine if Naruto opened the door.

Sasuke will be like, ‘Alright mothafucka!!! I wanted to die in the VoTE itself. You wanted me in your dream world. Am working my ass off for your stupid dreams and trying to reach you without even meeting my own family. And yet here you are, sleeping well and sound. Am just gonna Chidori you!!!’ LOL.

I think you get my point.

If you make Sasuke to be an hardworker, then Naruto must work even hard to fulfill his dream. So you possibly can’t have Naruto playing duet with Himata or whatever trash.

So kishi pulled his Two birds, One Stone for NH here!!!

In short, Kishi gets to make his New generation shine through this pathetic sob stories and at the same time, kept his favorite characters without going OOC.

So, it’s a polite way of Kishi showing middlefinger to SS and NH for making him do this. He is saying, ‘Alright folks, you wanted this all along. But this is what you will get!!!’.

Just makes me wonder how Kishi will finally conclude SNS, because their bond still shows clearly in Boruto. Do you think he will kill them any time soon?

I think about this all the time. How will they end?? How will they die??

Now, don’t think I am some sadist for wanting them to die. I am just being practical and honest here. This is a new generation series. Of course, at some point, Naruto and Sasuke has to die for the sake of character development. And I will be happy if they die because I don’t like their miserable portrayal in Boruto at all.

Naruto series has a pattern when it comes to death portrayal. Meaningful characters (except Neji) always die protecting someone/something they cherish. Jiraiya died for Naruto, Yahiko died for Konan & Nagato, Itachi died for Sasuke & Konoha, Haku died for Zabuza, Obito (younger) died for Kakashi & Rin and so on.

Ever since Naruto became Hokage, his death is pretty much plastered on his head. He will die protecting Konoha just like all the Hokages from First to Fourth who sacrificed their life for Konoha.

But Sasuke???

I am going to say he will die protecting Naruto or the village. But for Naruto mostly. Either way, Sasuke will die first.

Dying for Naruto, the reasons are crystal clear. He already died protecting Naruto once in the Zabuza arc. He will never hesitate to do it again. Which was evident from the way he told Naruto in the Boruto movie while giving his Susanoo, ‘If they capture the real you, then everything is gone’. Somewhere in Boruto Manga chapter 38 (I don’t remember properly), Sasuke was yelling at Naruto, ‘If you are gone, it’s pretty hopeless’ and was praying ‘Naruto, don’t you die’.

So it’s pretty much Sasuke saying to Naruto, ‘I’ll protect you, You protect everyone’

But why the village?? Why will Sasuke die for Konoha which caused him so much pain?? I know anti-konoha stans wont like this, but that’s the reality.

It seems many Sasuke fans never paid attention to his character. After hearing the story from all the Hokages, Sasuke said, ‘I will not let Itachi’s life and this village into nothing’. He really meant it. Because for Sasuke, Itachi was more precious. Itachi died saying, ‘I’ll have protected my village as Uchiha Itachi of Konoha once again. I have no more regrets’. Sasuke wanted to respect his brother’s wish finally and that’s why he openly claimed in the battlefield, ‘I am going to protect Konoha and become it’s Hokage’. Sasuke’s another precious person is Naruto. He is the Hokage now.

Don’t you think Sasuke will die protecting something Itachi and Naruto values so much??

He even claimed it openly in Boruto Manga. ‘I would die anytime for Konoha, as has your dad (Naruto)’

Sasuke even said to Boruto, “I will stop you even if I have to kill you”. And do you think Sasuke is just pouring out some empty words??? Sasuke will not let Boruto to turn into an Otsutsuki monster and destroy the village.

Like I said, Sasuke will go out first. And eventually Naruto will follow him. Or they both die protecting the village together. I don’t see them dying for their wives or children. Because, their relationship with their family is not too strong and their ambitions are far beyond their own families.

Maybe for this reason, Kishi is trolling NH and SS in Boruto. LOL.

Naruto’s bond with Sasuke was formed even before his birth, when Kushina asked the 3 month old Baby Sasuke to be friends with Naruto.

However, One thing is for sure. One will not live very long without the Other or Both will die together. That’s how their bond should end.

#naruto analysis #ask #sasuke uchiha #naruto #naruto uzumaki #sasuke

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