#all ive wanted is to get better. all this time. how much suffering do i have to go through before i ~earn~ that better.

[megadoomingir]

For the past five days ive been doing hardly anything else besides read Stop Me. I want to thank you for this story, it is the very first transformers fanfiction ive read (well, second if you count the one I’m beta reading for my friend, but first one I chose on my own), I’m relativly new to the fandom and not much of a fanfiction reader, but this story has hit exactly the right notes for me. transformers prime was the very first transformers property ive seen, and I love how youve retold the story without erasing the events of the canon story, with indulgent focus on my favorite character starscream while keeping all the other characters relevant. I especially appreciate keeping the human characters involved as I loved that element of the original. you do such a good job with each characters’ voice, I love that you retain in starscream his anxiously conniving nature and dangerousness even as he learns to be more heroic as the story goes on, and his transformation is so satisfying, as is his tenacity to endure the pain and suffering his character is clearly familiar with. broke my heart that scene where knock out and breakdown first enter his room after he had just gotten another wholloping from megatron, and it just keeps getting better and better. juicy stuff, all of it! thank you for the work you put into this, and I will eagerly be waiting for the finale!

!!!!!!

I’m honored my work was your first chosen Transformers fanfic! That is indeed very special~ ^^

I’m also grateful that you have enjoyed all that you’ve read so far. I intend to write more and, for those who are curious, I now have a firm, personal deadline for when I’d like to have it finished. Completely. It’s not any time super soon, but it will be done.

Thank you for being a reader and thank you so much for reaching out to message me. :)

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[taikk0]

JUST SAYING ONCE I LEARN TO PRONOUNCE MY T'S PROPERLY ITS OVER FOR YOU BUTTNUGGETS

[ozlices]

ive never felt so simultaneously hollow and heavy at once. i genuinely cant breathe from how heavy my heart is in my chest. im so dissociated i have a worse headache than i already did from crying and it's so fucked up and cruel to make me feel like none of this is real bc i wish it wasn't more than ive wished for anything in my life but is is. it's reality whether it feels like it or not. i watched my light leave this world and now i'm trapped in darkness without her and it's so empty and cold and i can't get the images and sounds out of my head of it happening and it hurts so much and i don't want to fucking keep going bc i lost my reason to live and without her what the fuck do i have to look forward to???? slowly but surely losing my rights for fucking existing??? i just...

ive dreaded this... for so many years. i knew it'd break me completely. but it's under such worse circumstances than i could've ever imagined. ive already been under such a constant strain for literal years now that my health declines more everyday. and now this. on top of everything else. on top of everything else she's gone. she was my emotional support and she's gone and she can't help me anymore and she never will be able to again and it hurts and i don't want to be in this sick, fucked up world without her but i cant handle the thought of my loved ones feeling the way i do right now over me so im just trapped.

why is this real why is this real why did this happen i wish it didn't i wish it didn't i wish it didn't

[thatdeadaquarius]

So like I just went through almost all your language posts and I was wondering what if like the creator sometimes just switches languages out of no where and everyone is just like:😃. Cuz like they don’t understand what they mean and it happens randomly too or when they’re irritated and they just start cussing in like 3 different languages at once

IM SO SORRY TO DO IT TO YOU-

but i think ive written some stuff abt this before?

u know what tho.

ive got an even better idea. my “go-to” if you will.

Torture Alhaitham.

>:)

^^^ ALHAITHAM RUNNING U DOWN AFTER YOU SAY EXACTLY (1) WORD IN ANOTHER LANGUAGE HE’S NEVER HEARD-

☆

Sun: Gender neutral Reader (you/they/them)

Orbit: SHORT headcanons-ish?, Language shenanigans!

Stars: Alhaitham (suffer lol)

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: None Known & Trigger Warnings: None Known.

he’s watching you. constantly.

he’s always writing about you.

he’s following you around Sumeru City.

he’s following you around Port Ormos.

he’s at your house-

Alhaitham learns you speak multiple languages before any other akademiya schloar, and he’s submitting a thesis about “the Greatest Lords languages from their home world”

before you can even say “I’ll think about it” in any language u know lol

people have definitely mistaken him as your favored acolyte (not that he does much to deny it)

and talk to him like he’s your secretary?? …oh, welp.

Alhaitham knows your schedule for the next month within a week of following you

mans is willing to do the MOST to get you to sit down and just start talking in a language at him

want food? his specialty dish ingredients are always at the ready at his house

want literature? he’s offering to literally break into the akademiya (or giving you a copy of his house key to have access to his personal library all the time)

(tho kaveh is practically hugging you to his chest as you walk around perusing as he talks ur ear off lmao)

Haitham (he sometimes insists you call him when it’s just you two) wants to singlehandedly be the first person who understands every word you say when u coo at dogs in another language

or cuss out a fictional character for being stupid

CRYING U CANT EVEN GET MAD AT HIM BC

every time u get pissed he’s interrupting every other word you say to ask for definitions/clarifications of slang 😭

send help he’s made a red string theory board of all the languages you’ve used to try and just- make sense of all their rules and when you use them and how to tell the difference and oh no-

Alhaitham’s hanging pictures of you mid-sentence with ur mouth open or even worse when ur yelling.

…u know maybe its not for an akademiya project, maybe he’s just trying to humble you. 💀

☆

thanks again for sending this ask in!! :D

language sagaus my beloved <3

tbh i have likeeeee 54 things in my drafts rn? so needless to say im slow, BUT IM SO HAPPY U GUYS GAVE ME THIS MUCH TO FAWN OVER, REQUESTS OR NO <333333333333

:]

an iced coffee? for me?? :O

☆

Safe Travels Ariasdream,

💀♒

☆

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks

[h3arts4harry]

- privilege -

- one - two -

based on 'privilege' by the weeknd

warnings: UNRESOLVED ANGST, drugs, death, arguing, toxic friends

chris sturniolo x reader

-

"y/n i cant do this anymore, ive tried i really have but you-" chris backs away from me, struggling to find the words. "chris please, ill get better i-ill cut them all off, i please chris ill do anything" i step forward, tears stream down my face, he backs away again, "chris p-lease" my voice breaks, he shakes his head with swallowing shaking away the tears so desperate to fall "im sorry y/n, i really hate to do this but we're done." i drop to my knees sobbing, my head falling into my hands, chris has to fight himself to not comfort me so he turns to walk out the front door, "fine! LEAVE! ENJOY YOUR PRIVILEGED LIFE! SEE IF I CARE!" i yell, we both know i dont mean it.

chris checks his phone to see if y/n has messaged him but hes heard nothing since that night, not that he wants to hear that shes suffering, hes suffering too. he loved her more than anything in the world but he couldn't stand to see her destroy herself anymore, he tried helping her but she would just brush it off or argue with him.

the breakup hit me hard. i didn't fully realise it yet but it did. i got closer with my new, so called, 'friends' we would do any drugs we could get ahold f and drink til we physically couldnt take it in anymore almost everyday. i called up our dealer james, "sup y/n how you doing?" "i urm, good, i was just calling to see if you had anything on you?" "yea i just picked up some new shit, can see you in like an hour maybe?" "yea sounds good thanks" "aight ill hit you up when im there" "mhm bye" and with that i hang up placing my phone on my nightstand, laying on my back staring at the ceiling, waiting for the time to go past.

"thanks james" i say taking the bag from him "yea no problem, i'erd about your fella, these should be able to help take the blues away" he smirks leaning against my door frame, i nod examining the familiar bag. "imma head out, be safe now. or dont. up to you" he shrugs walking over to his car. i shut the door and head to the kitchen, laying the red pills on the counter before looking for something to crush them with. i pick up my credit card and cut it into lines, rolling up a dollar, then slowly snorting the powder hoping itll make me feel as good as it used to. its never as good as the last.

"just get in the car. you love parties itll be fun trust me" kayla says from the passenger seat, "ugh fine let me just get changed, ill be five minutes" i cave in, turning back into to house, i walk into my bedroom picking up a small black dress off my desk chair swiftly pulling it on, its looser than it used to be but i dont have time to look for another. i slip on black heels to match, running out the car where kayla, james, Allison, and tyler are waiting for me. "finally lets go" Allison says from next to me.

the next goes fast, i dont remember how many drinks ive had. i pull out my phone and dial chris's number while stumbling out into the backyard. "hello?" "c-chris?" "what do you want y/n?" "i-i miss you…chris?" "hm?" "do you miss me too?" "y/n.." "please chris i- i just need- i need to know" my voice breaks, i didnt realise im full blown sobbing into the phone until now"i cant do this. not to me. not to you. y/n please go get help"' "i cant chris! they dont care about me! they dont care about me or anyone but themselves! all i am to them is someone to drink with, smoke with, snort fuck knows what with! i-i cant do it anymore its to much.. they said our love was just a game but- but i dont care, i cant do this without you chris" i can hear his shaky breaths down the phone "y/n.. i tried to help you, for months i tried but you always went back. it hurts to much, i- i need to go" "chris wait please- just let me see you" "no y/n. i dont wanna hear about you suffering anymore. i- i cant." "NO NO PLEASE CHRIS NO WAI-" the small beeps were deafening.

"i know i said i didn't want to hear about you suffering but now if i could go back, i would've said that i couldn't hear you suffer anymore, it was so hard to see you destroy yourself, i thought that if i left you would've got help but i realise now that i shouldve helped you, i should've tried harder, should've forced you-" "but instead im stood here, talking to a headstone- shit." tears fall down his face as he sat kneeling at your grave.

you overdosed that night. you had been found laying there on the cold wet grass of a strangers house, drowning in your tears. because of him.

as much as his brothers constantly reassured him that it wasn't his fault it wasn't enough. chris couldn't feel anything but guilty, as if he had taken her life with his own hands. in his eyes he kind of did, it haunted him that he could've changed the outcome.

-

my first request! thank you for sending it in🫶🫶

ive never actually listened to this song before but i had it on repeat while righting this so i hope it meets your expectations lol

as always feedback is appreciated <333

THANK YOU FOR READING

LOVE YOU POOKIES

taglist:

@m0r94n @sturnzsblog @junnniiieee07 @chrisgetsmewetterxo @raysmayhem-72 @sturniolo-slvt @mattspolitank @cerismo

[stampgwifeyera]

why i love house md so much

while i don't use a mobility aid i do have a lot of chronic pain and because of that i relate so much to house. i think one of my favorite things is the way he'll self harm to distract himself from the pain like in season one when he broke his hand or when he gave himself a migraine or when he would pace around his room constantly to tire himself out even the fact that he uses his cane incorrectly causing him extra pain or how he constantly rubs his left leg (which HAS to hurt) its just so real to the chronic pain experience and i love seeing it.

one of my favorite scenes from the show is in S8 and Taub tells him that Wilson just doesn't want to be in pain and house just yells at him that "LIFE IS PAIN I WAKE UP I'M IN PAIN I GO TO WORK IN PAIN, DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES IVE WANTED TO GIVE UP? HOW MANY TIMES IVE WANTED TO END IT?" its just all too relatable and devastating as house lives for Wilson (and his job) so the fact Wilson wouldn't go through a fraction of the pain he goes through daily for him probably broke his heart. (not that I'm angry at Wilson or smth i get why he did what he did)

another thing too is the way he makes his pain his identity he doesn't want to get help because his pain is who he thinks he is hes scared of getting better because hes become used to being in pain, i remember thinking like that too because when you live in chronic pain you get so used to it you're scared of the change that it getting better would bring you'd rather suffer than change such an integral part of your daily life even if its torture. and i never thought id see something like that on tv but this show actually shows it and i almost cried seeing my experience represented so well.

being in constant pain changes you so much and i don't think a lot people truly realize what it can do to you.

anyways sorry for the rant i just love this show so much!!

[alessiamalfoyzabini]

𝐇𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐄𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 | 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐓𝐰𝐨

Pairing | Yandere Jungkook x Reader

Word Count | 1,672

Warnings | +18, bullying, attempted sexual harassment, panic attack

This does not reflect my way of thinking or living at all, it is just a work of fiction, it is like watching a horror movie, many of us love horror movies, but we would never dream of what we see in those movies happening in reality as well.

Simply put, this story was written for entertainment purposes, it should not be seen as a reflection of my values, opinions or morals. I absolutely do not condone such acts.

⤷ Summary | If she had paid attention earlier to the sin that dwelt behind those obsidian irises, she would never have trusted it.

If she had noticed earlier the devouring love that dwelled in his corrupt heart, she probably would have fled.

She had done none of that, and now she had to come to terms with her new reality.

➢ Author's Note | I'm back with the second chapter of Happy Ending, I hope you can enjoy it 🥰❤

Chapter List - I - II - III - IV - V - VI - VII - VIII / The End

Toward the end of class, some had already turned in their drawings, others had yet to finish, and Jungkook intimated that they should bring them the next time they saw each other. Y/N shakily got up from her seat, sent down too much saliva as she came within a few steps of the boy, who lifted his face in her direction, giving her a warm smile. "Y/N! Are you done?" The girl nodded, unable to verbalize her thoughts, so she placed the drawing on the desk, bending down a bit, this gave Jungkook a chance to get a better peek at how she was dressed that day, drinking in the sight of her legs and imagining how soft and creamy they might be in his adoring hands. He ran a hand through his hair, pushing the most unruly strands back, and Y/N froze, following his movements with her eyes.

"Wow, Y/N...great job, as always," he complimented, proud that his good girl had done such a detailed job of depicting the disembodied cloud with shapeless, skeletal hands-that to her was bullying, something no adult could see, but which managed to trap its victims in a spiral of suffering and muteness. The girl blushed at his words, bowing slightly before reaching her seat. Behind her back she sensed a slight snort that caused her to stiffen. Jungkook had to leave the command to another colleague, stared disgruntled at the girl, but vowed to do something for her, or rather, for both of them. He would not let that terrible pattern continue, Y/N deserved better, in his arms he would be able to give her the happiness and love she lacked, as he could clearly see.

And so the day continued, until it was time to return home.

Y/N hurriedly packed her things, the threat of Yoozu loomed over her, and anxiously walked out of the classroom. She didn't greet anyone, and no one greeted her, she looked fearfully at every corner of the corridors, a hustle and bustle of students and teachers did not allow her to increase her pace, she found herself pushing through the crowd almost in desperation, she wanted anything but to be in the jaws of her classmate. Oh, if only she had known... "So, beggar!" someone brutally grabbed her by the arm, pulling her to him right outside the university, Yoozu stared at her with anger concealed behind a fake smile, "We still haven't discussed the slap you so kindly printed on my face," he growled.

Y/N felt herself dying, she tried to wriggle out of her companion's firm grip, but it proved utterly useless, the boy's icy fingers pressed on her tender skin without restraint. "Let go of me! Let go of me, Yoozu!" she exclaimed in panic, her breathing shorter and her heartbeat faster, but he if possible painfully increased his grip on her wrist, painful bruises would appear shortly. "Not so fast, first you have to pay me back for the shit you made me look like today," he hissed, dragging her toward a more secluded alley, Y/N grabbed the mirror of a car parked nearby in a desperate attempt to save herself, but Yoozu was much stronger than she was, "Be good, I'll only need your mouth, then I'll let you go for today." Those words were the straw, the girl began to scream and call for help, Yoozu immediately plugged her mouth but it was too late. Someone had heard her, and that someone was smoking with rage.

"What the hell is going on here?" The quiet but unusually dangerous voice made the boy pale, and he suddenly let go of his grip on the girl. Y/N fell to the ground with momentum, right at the feet of someone she knew. She lifted her gaze and caught the icy expression on Jungkook's handsome face; she also seemed to catch a glimpse of murderous fury in his irises, but in fact she could not be one hundred percent certain. "I... nothing, I just wanted to apologize to Y/N for today," Yoozu dared to say, but Jungkook did not buy that pathetic excuse. "Is that so? It would seem anything but to me." Jungkook had seen the whole scene, had even managed to hear those vulgar words that had screwed up his self-control. "Professor, it really went like this! But Y/N didn't understand, she thought that-" a sob interrupted his absurd explanations, Jungkook's heart clenched, as did his eyes. "Kang Yoozu, you are expelled." "Wait, what! You can't do that! You are not the principal, and on the basis of what then?!" Yoozu panicked, Jungkook found it disgusting. "I'm not the principal, but I'm on good terms with him, as for the motivation...how does attempted rape sound to you?" he asked wryly, making the boy gasp. No, with such a charge no other university would have accepted him and his parents would have sent him to some godforsaken place in shame. "Professor, can we talk about this? Please, this will ruin my life," he prayed agitatedly, admitting his real intentions that way. "The more I listen to you, the more I want to ruin something else too! Get out of my sight, Kang!" he shouted furiously, Yoozu at first seemed not to understand, then casting a glance at Y/N's kneeling figure he took a step back and began to run.

Jungkook inhaled deeply, trying to calm himself somehow, he couldn't believe what had happened before his own eyes, he turned to the girl and felt only immense pain, she was on her knees on the icy asphalt wet with rain, she kept holding her head in her hands, trying to stifle her sobs. He lowered himself in her direction, god, she was beautiful even with her face overflowing with tears. He brought two fingers under her chin, gently forcing her to lift her face to his, chaining their eyes together. "Hey, Y/N..." he gently blew on her, gathering the tears that ran down her full cheeks with his thumbs, "Are you okay?"

If possible, Y/N exploded into more sobs, throwing herself on her professor. She pushed into his chest seeking comfort, Jungkook was frozen for a moment, he did not expect such a reaction from the girl, his heartstrings tugged filling with warmth, he returned the embrace immediately, holding that tender body to him. "It will never end," she cried into his neck, breathing hard between sobs and bathing the boy's skin with warm salt water, "It will always be like this." Jungkook stroked her hair, imprinting the sweet scent of her on his mind, mentally whispering to her that no, it would not be like this anymore, that he would protect her. "No, Y/N... I'll talk to the principal, they won't hurt you anymore, trust me," he said instead continuing to gently caress her back, having her like this was like a dream just realized, he didn't even know how long he had wanted it, "Can you trust me, Y/N?" He moved her face away from his chest, seeking a clear answer from her, he wanted to be sure she wanted his help. Y/N let a trembling sigh escape, nodding. Jungkook's eyes were so sincere and crystal clear that it was natural for her to trust him, although her body still trembled at the mere thought of what Yoozu wanted to do to her. "Yes, I can," she murmured, Jungkook felt the need to kiss her just then, she was so polite and tender his little girl, who knows if she would have said the same begging him to give her more.

"I'll drive you home, Y/N, I have my car right next door, okay?" the young woman nodded without thinking much about it, her mind still too shocked by recent events to really think. Jungkook helped her up, escorting her to his car as if she had been a little doll in his hands. They both climbed into the vehicle and Jungkook got directions to find their way, cast a glance at the younger woman's legs, his hand itching to touch them, but he forced himself not to go too far for the moment. Rather, he focused on the magnificent smell of his favorite student, but the closer he got to his destination, the more he found himself turning up his nose. He didn't like that neighborhood; it was one of the most dangerous in the fucking city. Every day on the news there were reports of robberies, or worse. He cast a sidelong glance at the girl, wondering how she had survived in that place so far. Knowing her in that bad place upset him in no small part, and when they reached the apartment building Jungkook's gaze grew hard-they could all get to those windows, they were pretty old, too.

"Well, I live here, professor! Thank you for the ride and... for the help," she found herself saying impishly, Jungkook melted into yet another smile that day, the real and sincere ones were all for her, she just didn't know it yet. "Just ask, Y/N...and I'll be here for you," he said earnestly, the girl nodded, unable to respond and opened the door to get out of the car, gave one last wave and then ran inside. Leaving behind the eager gaze of her teacher. She closed the door to her apartment behind her back, a deep warm throbbing did not hint at leaving her anytime soon.

Jungkook's presence was all she could think about, she let herself slide against the surface of the door, in her mind were imprinted images of the man holding the steering wheel firmly in his strong hands, his muscular arms still uncovered and damp with rain, seemed strong enough to carry her without any effort at all, not to mention how he had defended her without too much trouble, quietly defying the economic power of Yoozu's parents, she clutched her legs to her chest, hiding her red face between them. Damn, she was really in love.

[thecherrytarot]

𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐜 𝐝𝐞𝐛𝐭.

pick a hiromi higuruma to know about your karmic debt.

pile 1 → pile 2 → pile 3

Pick the photo you feel the most drawn to and please remember that this is a general reading so take what resonates!!

𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟏:

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐣𝐮𝐝𝐠𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞:

this pile is confusing me cause one, there are multiple messages and two, im not exactly sure what is the 'debt' that you owe but im seeing more of what is happening to you as a result.

you feel like you have lost all the structure in your well-balanced life due to some sort of authority figure taking control of you and your decisions, you have this feeling of helplessness and you keep thinking that "if i had control i would have achieved so much by now but things aren't aligning and i keep delaying my plans due to XYZ not making better decisions and life choices and i have to suffer the consequences of their actions while they get to live life easily while i settle" or something along the lines of that, (I was getting an even bigger message because i felt like you finally got a chance to communicate) you have bigger plans that you want to achieve and you know there is more to your life than what is in front of you but this feeling of not accomplishing your goals or what if you don't is eating you alive. for some of you, this may be due to you putting "minimal" effort in it and hoping that it everything magically works out but that is not the case sometimes. you let outside influence set you back and lose your will to progress in other areas as well. (i believe that it is okay to "fail" in certain things cause to me rejection is redirection and there is no harm in trying again) the advice here is simple; create and follow your path and put effort in, motivation will help you but only for a few days, what you need is discipline. do not let fear and your negative self-image hold you back from taking the direction that will take you in your desired direction. i don't know why but Santigo's journey from the book Alchemist came to my so if you haven't read that book please read it cause it might help you. learn to be patient with your decisions doesn't matter if they are long-term or short-term because regardless of that, they have consequences (our Karam) and it is important for you to not be impulsive to feel some sort of control over the decisions in your life. find a healthier attitude in your life and watch things change for the better, it is a slow process but it is worth it.

overall, the message is asking you to self-evaluate yourself and see if your actions have led to these consequences and what is that you are not learning. you always have a choice to make and it is a bitter pill to swallow but you can not blame others for it. i keep thinking about this dialogue said by King Baldwin IV, "When you stand before God, you cannot say, "But I was told by others to do this." Or that, "Virtue was not convenient at the time." This will not suffice. Remember that.”

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟐:

𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞:

the message is similar to some parts of pile 1 so if you felt drawn to it, do check it out.

some of you could have been knowingly or unknowingly avoiding the accountability of your actions. life feels unjust and cruel cause of outside forces but remember to maintain balance and stay true to your higher self because the way you will react to these situations is gonna create your karma. im seeing that you will have a chance to fix your negative karma into a more positive one. heal yourself and realize that nothing outside of you has power over you, you are the one who decides how you accept, feel, think and do the things in your life. learn from your lessons and grow through the experience instead of refusing to accept anything. this will set you free. the more you neglect it the bigger it will get. it may feel as if you are trapped but remember that sometimes it is an illusion that we create in our heads out of fear of both, failing (the 'now what will i do?' feeling) and succeeding (the 'then what will i do?' feeling) detachment with the results might help you with this. i keep thinking of this saying in Quaran, "kun faya kun" which means "be, and it is!" life is not simple for anyone and hardships are also a part of our journey. it may feel like it is easy to avoid it and run but for how long will you do that? you have the free will; either to repeat those same mistakes and hold on to the things that are no longer helping you or find something new for yourself. i don't know how to write this in a way that will make sense but the message im getting is that the karmic debt that you owe to the universe is just rising above this and making peace with yourself and your surroundings. put your energy into things that you know will help you instead of being manipulated by outside influence remember that you are your own person before you are anyone to someone else.

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟑:

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞, 𝐭𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐭.:

this pile feels a little heavy cause this includes past life karma (for some it could also be generational) and im pretty sure many of you are already seeing or sensing a pattern of past mistakes happening again and again and you feel like regardless of what you will do the outcome will be the same. the message here is that it is not entirely true but rather an illusion that you have created. you have your free will to continue it or change it. it is a slow and long process with lots of ups and downs as it is a cycle of multiple lives and not something that can fixed magically overnight. taking the shorter and easier route won't help you. it is important to heal, connect with yourself and trust your instincts. you may feel like the outside guidance is confusing you more rather than giving you clarity. the answer to this is simple; it is within you, catered to you since it is YOUR life and YOUR karma. you are becoming aware of the things that make you feel so restricted and some are even working on limiting the control others have on you, for others, the motivation is rising (if not use this as a sign) learn from the previous mistakes and avoid them. cause you do have a big purpose in your current life regarding this karmic cycle and you are being called out to make the necessary decisions to bring the change. You are not being punished for your past or someone else's mistakes, you are meant to learn a few life lessons to grow. for some reason, i felt picking out separate cards as a guidance message for this pile; your self-doubt is creating an illusion in you and you are letting it win. things get hard now and then but we shouldn't give in to our negative energy and insecurities. show determination and willpower, there is a strong desire in you to succeed and you need to execute it and it will be yours.

thank you so much for reading !!!

[threepandas]

Bad End: Traps

"Darling~!" A rich voice greeted me, as I stepped through the final doors leading to an opulent office. "You're looking better! Are you finally adjusting to the anti-poisons? I know they made you feel quite sick."

THAT was an understatement. Try worst cramps and fever of my life, with a dose of puking for days. They put me on IVs. Buuuut? I wasn't gonna say THAT. Not a chance in hell. We, team Earth that is, were supposed to be here for DIPLOMACY. So? Fucking LIE~☆

Yep! "Bit" sick. Just a touch. Hardly noticed, really. Took a nap.

Veneni laughed, rising from the elegant sprawl she'd been resting on one of her "not called couches but totally are" things. To be honest, her voice reminds me of those old "radio stars" from the clips at the museums. All smooth yet husky, curling around you, like they're going to invite you somewhere dark to learn a naughty little secret if you're very VERY good.

Kind of voice you could listen too for HOURS, reading the most boring shit imaginable, and it be the best time you'd had in years.

I am... SO gay, for Veneni.

Like? You DO NOT UNDERSTAND. She SASHAYS. Not walks. Not strolls. Sashays! Like life is a catwalk and she is the alpha bitch here to show these other models how it's DONE. But also? Like she doesn't even NOTICE! It's just... effortless. How she moves. All delicate hand motions and rolling hips and curves.

That I Can Not Touch because she is SUUUUPER poisonous.

Which is? Frankly? Homophobic and a crime against me, specifically. Yeah, her whole species is like that. And it's why all of us are suffering through the Anti-poison adjusters. But STILL! I can't even "accidentally" brush her hand? No potential kissing of hot hot hot alien gf? Illegal. Blocked. Everyone here is a bastard and I want to complain.

.....not, mind you, that I have the metaphorical lady balls to actually CONFESS anything.

But you know... maybe.... maybe if I pine hard enough?

Good ol' stand awkwardly nearby and mentally project "NOTICE ME SEMPAI!" At her? I put on my nice outfit! Makes the girls look-! Wait, does her species even give a shit about boobs? FUCK. Okay, see this? THIS is why I was a flight assist. Just inventory and handing stuff to people who knew what they were doing.

MASTER of the fine arts of "I Can Understand The Instruction Manuel, In Case Of Emergency"!

Pretty good at coffee, too. Not to brag.

But, like? Jokes aside? Things had been... Bad.

Everything had gone to shit. Then somehow found a shovel in the manure pile and started digging. Started OUT okay! Really, it had! Travel was unexpectedly a bit rough. Some sort of space storm that went RIGHT over my head, but we dodged every major catastrophe. Got here in one piece.

There was a fancy meeting party. Whiiiich? In hindsight? Terrible idea. WAY too many people with hella poisonous skin, standing WAY too close. Only reason we didn't IMMEDIATELY lose the head diplomate? Was the regulation "new planet, unknown pathogens" full body biosuit. He? Got a HUG. Like... right out the ship.

Oof. That would have been IT, for him. Unfortunately, he didn't make it past that much longer. Someone's pet bit him. And? Yep. Completely fucking venomous. Lethally so. A tragedy, right? Outlier, surely?

Ha!

No. No this planet was trying to fucking kill us. It was a toxin coated hellpit and had so far? Murdered just over half the diplomatic crew. Those that were still alive? Over half of THEM were in emergency care. With just over a forth of the OTHER survivors being the only ones who could safely care for them.

Rest of us were either in isolation or sick as FUCK.

Isolation for those who needed to get rescued, because the Anti-poison adjusters would fucking kill them. Or sick as hell, for those few who remain that finally, FINALLY had found a way to Not DIE.

ALL WHILE PEACE TALKS WERE TRYING TO HAPPEN.

It was a shit show~☆

I? Went from basically a nobody? To "congrats! By merit of NOT being dead or dying, you're the head diplomat by proxy!" Which? Fucking WHAT? You could physically SEE the stress radiating off the poor guys back home, as they tried to speed run me through "how to not Accidentally A War 101".

I was pretty sure his cup, did in fact, NOT contain coffee. But I wasn't telling.

Instead, I got the honor of carrying the video call. Literally. Since our tech was incompatible. I got to carry the whole set up. Portable battery included. So the ACTUAL Really, Actually, Trained In Diplomacy, Diplomat could call in. And then I could look pretty and nod seriously at the appropriate times.

Mmmmhmmm. Yes. I agree. I both understand what is being said, AND support Earth's position on these matters! I have definitely studied the materials. Am supposed to be here. We have DEFINITELY suffered no catastrophic loses, pay no attention to the chaos behind the curtains! Diploooomacyyyyy....

God, she is pretty.

Watching her smile, her sensors gently shift around her like flowing water, the way her hand delicately gestured as she spoke? I... I wanted to build her, like, a cabin or something. Bring her breakfast in bed. Maybe adopt an alien dog together. And like? I don't even KNOW how to build shit. But, fuck it. I'd learn.

Cause I mean... you KNOW you got it bad, when you look at Toxic Super Hell the planet, look at pretty lady, look BACK at the planet that in no uncertain terms ACTIVELY thirsts for your blood... and go?

"So when do I move? Feeling REAL patriotic for my new home! Wooo, New Home!"

Yes I have a problem. Shut up, I'm aware.

A quite click signaled the end of their talks. Finally done for the day. I definitely, in now way shape or form, perk up like an excited puppy hearing the word "walkies". Because that? THAT would suggest I had WAY more dignity. I am a thirsty, thirsty bitch, okay? SO PRETTY. Nice laugh! Calls me Darling!! I have a LIST!!!

"Mmmm, what an unpleasant man that was. Did something happen to Mr. Ho?" She asked, stretching in the slow rolling way of hers. It looked boneless and decadent. REALLY distracting. "I hope nothing Serious~. We were nearly on the cusp of getting you home! I do hope he gets well soon. But, ah~, where ARE my manner today, Darling? You must be starving!"

Veneni sweeps forward to tuck my arm in hers, pulling me against her side. Even through my biosuit and her modest dress... I... I can FEEL her body heat. How soft and warm she feels pressed close against me. She smells tingly and spiced, kinda like citrus and mulled cider. NOT! That I'm smelling her! WHICH I'M NOT!! Because that would be so, SO creepy! It's just-!? You know-?! AaaaaaAAA???

She guides me to our little table. Probably set up for guests in general. But... you know... kinda like to THINK of it? As ours?

I REALLY need to stop while I am ahead. Good fucking gods. Ignore me.

Mmm, yes, distraction cake! Let's talk about THAT instead! Wonder what she-? I then choked on my drink. Because... because after bringing out the usual traditional deserts of she was teaching me about? And dishes I could try? Veneni... c.. casually as you please rests her chin, propped up on one hand, then reaches out with the other... to place it on my hand, which rests on the table between us.

Hear that? That's my soul screaming at a pitch only dolphins can make.

OH MY GOD.

I'd like to say? I don't immediately embarrass myself? But that's a lie. I make a wheeze reminiscent of something dying horribly. Against all odds. She is NOT immediately disgusted and done with me. Dear lord, my parents may actually have a chance at seeing me married! Holy FUCK.

Wait. No. Slow your roll.

SMILE first. We GOT this! Seduce her!

I open my mouth... and stupid fell out. FUCK.

"Calm yourself, Darling!" She laughs, the bemused fondness lighting up her face. "You hardly need to impress ME! Believe me. I knew you were mine the second I saw you. Nothing could possibly change that~"

Her cute fangs catch the light, deadly sharp. Her's is a predatory species. I wonder if they like social touch? Cause I REALLY want to cuddle. Hold hands. Touch. Ooooother stuff~ But! Mostly the Hold Cute Alien GF! Assuming that's where this is headed. Please GOD let that be where this is headed!

"I was thinking... and I don't want to be too forward, of course," oh god please do "and I hope I'm not interpreting things incorrectly!" You are not. Take me you magnificent, purple, high femme queen amongst the masses. "But... I would VERY much like to... get to know you, Darling. On a more... personal level...?"

I kept my lips pressed desperately together to keep from literally shouting the word "Yes" in her face. Be cool. BE COOL! We are both cool and Very Normal About This! Scream in incoherent joy later!

Y..Yeah! Sounds great!

This is the best day of my-!

An explosion shook the biodome. While the whole planet WAS toxic as fuck? There were levels to it's toxicity. Some places too much for even native life forms to handle. And, of course, no place that non-natives could safely survive. Thus the capital's biodome. Highly filtered air, earth, and resources. Built for diplomacy and several critical care hospitals.

Now under attack. Another bomb exploded. Cracks in the dome.

I could only stare in mute horror at the pillar of smoke. Because... Because that was the isolation area. Our evac's. Someone just blew up... Then my brain seemed to comeback online all at once, as adrenaline flooded my system. I looked between the still unpacked call system and Veneni.

A piece of tech or a high ranking, probably high interest target. My maybe hopefully girlfriend. Not really much of a choice.

Fucking LEAVE IT.

We had to go. I pulled Veneni up, told her as much. She looked so startled.

"Of... Of course, Darling. Yes. You're right. I AM probably a target, aren't I?" The thought didn't seem to have occurred to her. God, I felt like a monster having to bring such ugliness to her attention. Scaring her like this. But ignorance wouldn't keep either of us safe.

"I...I think there was a safe room?" She faltered, arms crossing almost artfully, looking so uncertain I couldn't help but want to comfort her. "But, Darling, I'll admit.. I'm.. I think I'm rather scared. Will you protect me? Stay with me? ...please?"

I couldn't help it. She looked so scared. So delicately small. I stepped forward, arms going around her. Pulling her close like I could shield her from the world. I wouldn't let anything happen to her. I promised myself. Felt her arms, a few of her sensors, desperately curl around me.

I didn't see the smile, pressed against my front. That quickly vanished as she pulled back. Nor did I notice the calm technician, hidden in the shadows of a side hall, who nodded at Veneni as I herded her to "safety". Would think nothing of how, tragically, my rooms were hit in the follow up blasts. How very lucky, that Veneni has rooms to spare. But oh~ she would not want to over step!

I don't notice a lot of things. But hey, things are great! I got a girlfriend! Or, as she likes to joke,

She Got Me.

[nyxi-pixie]

Hiiiii.

Sorry to bother you, I wanted to know if you had any fic recs? Your writing is so good and your tastes are immaculate, and I am starving for any kind of good content. Please?

its not possible to bother me love dw <3

NOW. i dont actually read all that much anymore bc i am horrendously picky but this does give me an excuse to hype up the few authors that have satisfied my unreasonably specific tastes 🤩.

so. a few bsd recs for you (except theyre 99% skk because im horribly predictable forever). everyone go read all of these and tell the authors how wonderful they are in the comments please <3

anything @booksandpaperss has ever written is genius work and everyone should read it. could talk abt all of their stuff for hours (and i have🤩 they put up w so much of me bothering them godbless). also our brains do some accidental crazy mind melding shit whenever either of us write fic so if you like any of my stuff you will like theirs. thats the rules. <3

like twin stars in the dark (we collide)- dead apple skk porn as a vehicle for 22skk analysis. makes me salivate i have read it so many times. they get 22skk better than anyone🙏

my lies are for you to keep (my love for you to lose) - the only take on beastskk that matters to me ever. you can actually see me losing my mind in the comment i wrote on this fic bc of how fucking insane every single line made me. theres SO much packed into this thing its fucking crazy i NEEEEED everyone to read it. thats all <3

till death, I'll give you my breath - dazai death timeloop. this fic terrifies me so much i await every update with my teeth chattering and my heart pulsing so rapidly i should be hospitalised. the first scene of chapter 2 genuinely had me on the verge of tears im unwell about it.

(elli also has some jjk stuff thats REALLYREALLY good and if ur into jjk u should check that out too.)

NOW. aside from being a propaganda machine for my fav writer ever. Heres some other stuff i love.

the second perspective by @wildflowerteas. murder mystery/detective noir stuff w some time fuckery. the au of all time. mashes aspects of beast, canon, and some extra special niko sauce into a mixing bowl and goes crazy w it. just Such a genuinely impressive piece of writing. i could talk abt the technical brilliance of it for hours but i will stop myself. you gotta commit to this thing because it WILL make u crazy. also i loveee the sskk. its like if we had the beast first meeting sskk forever. SOSO GOOD!!!!

did fate guide the gun or did you? by @kanetheo. i read this pretty soon after chapter 109 and it genuinely fried my brain for months. the writing style is beautiful (as for everything they write AUGHH!!!) and the angst is delectable. the way it intersperses more fun silly skk moments with just. complete misery. GOD. it just hits. ive reread it quite a few times and it never fails to make me go crazy. srsly cannot rec this enough.

the decomposition of dazai osamu by @hella1975 this shot several bullets through my brain and i still havent recovered. i keep thinking 'oh i should reread that' and then i dont bc some part of my brain still concerns itself w maintaining whats left of my sanity. BUT its crazy good and everyone should read it and suffer at least once. EVERYONE LOVES YOU OSAMU!!!! EVERYONE EATS YOU!!! line of all time lets all kill ourselves.

smoke held conversations by feralrookie - i havent reread this in a while but it does cool stuff with nlh and the skkisms are really good in this too. ppl often write teen chuuya as less intelligent than he actually is. hes very observant, esp of dazai, and this fic gave me that 🙏

i called your name til the fever broke by forest_raccoon - vampire chuuya. biting is involved. i blacked out reading it. enough said.

[chaisshitposts]

Write A Letter To Yourself To Find The Answers You Want. || 'Dear Subconscious...'

have ya ever had a problem at hand that ya just couldn't figure out a solution to? it's such a deeply perplexing problem that ya just decide to shrug it off and maybe 'sleep it off.' and so, ya do just that... and maybe in the middle of the night, or as soon as ya wake up, or maybe even two days later in the middle of a totally unrelated task, ya get a random idea, a random thought, or perhaps a random solution that was the answer. that was yer subconscious, answerin' that problem ya were so stumped on.

which got me thinkin'... why haven't i considered askin' my subconscious a direct question? ive seen this happen in movies before, usually with— people who have DID or MPD, or perhaps someone who sleep walks, or suffers black outs. I've seen people leave notes and messages to themselves.

why haven't I just written a letter addressed to my subconscious and let it solve everything for me? why haven't I asked my subconscious to show me the answer or give me the answers I need to tap into being in the state of pure consciousness? the letter is personal to me, and my subconscious knows me best, so why the fuck wouldn't I trust what it has to say? i already do muscle testin' to get my yes/no answers, I already do fuckin' tarot readin's on myself— so... why not do this? can't believe I haven't done this yet.

and with that thought, I got my handy notebook, sat down at my dining room table, and got to writin', starting the letter off by saying 'dear subconscious...' I spilled my most vulnerable guts afterwards and the rest was history.

I'm gonna tell ya right now, full transparency, I wrote to my subconscious about how much I want to enter the void state/I Am State and asked it for clear signs in my letter, I told it to give me the answers I want in a way that only I could understand. an experiment worth while... originally, i wasn't gonna post this but then i got my answers and i wanted to share this with ya lovely folks of this lil' dandy community.

I bet you're wonderin' what was the answer I got from my subconscious. I got multiple answers, as terrifying as that is, and I cannot even fathom how I can explain them properly. All I know is that I feel unwavering peace in all aspects of my life. but if yer really curious, I got a message in a tarot readin' video and through the spinoff of adventure time that just came out, not too long ago on max. Fiona and Cake. the shit they say in the show is... I can't even explain how it made me feel, just finished watchin' the entire series today. it was everything I needed to know, I asked my subconscious for an answer that only I would understand and what would ya know... i love musicals and animated shows/movies, and behold, i gotta damn combo. i definitely recommend it to my fellow manifesters!!! they literally talk about how easy it is to create yer own REALITIES in the damn show... that's what we fuckin' do!!!!

how do I write a letter to myself?

address yourself a letter as 'dear subconscious' and then get to writin'. you're literally sendin' yerself a letter, say whatever ya want in it, write yer secrets, write yer fears, write yer dreams. ask yer subconscious whatcha need to do to get yer dream life guaranteed and ya shall receive. some people may not like the idea of this but, what's the harm in a lil' conversation with yerself and findin' out the answers ya need. It can especially help ya if you've been strugglin' for a while, 'specially with all ya folks out there who've been on yer void journey for multiple years. what better way to get yer answers than to speak to yerself through yer own mind... wah, that sounds fuckin' coconuts but I stand by it.

essentially, this is just a combo of commandin' yer subconscious and scriptin', that's not hard at all. and who said ya gotta handwrite it? ya can type it out on yer phone or even yer computer if ya want, do whatever feels good and allows ya to write out yer guts and frustration. after that, ya can relax and see what happens next. that's all in this post! thanks for readin' and I hope ya get the answers ya seek! until next time!~

p.s. this ain't a challenge, it's just another way to get to know what you need to do to accomplish your dreams as the individual creator of yer reality. you'll know when yer answers come. hell, might even come to ya in the middle of the night or even in a random movie in the form of a quote that is far too relatable to yer situation ya decided to sit down and watch one day. kinda like what happened with me... hehe.

[theoldoor]

a little late for summertime dont you think

just some post-talia bummery from these two i love them to the point that i have to remind myself that one isnt even canon like this is torture.

I dont have much to say for this post as ive said pretty much everything about post-talia them posts prior, I DO however, have a lot of talia rambling to do- which will be saved when i doodle enough stuff for it

They still have that little bickering and bantering thing going on, passive aggressiveness with one another and being the one who gets the other into silly troubles despite both being elites. Like how Jade said Topaz and Aventurine bickers like kids, these two however, bicker like those alt older brothers in coming of age movies and his bromantic bro bestfriend (ive said this before so manu times but i cant find a better way to describe them)

mayeb something like todd and wallace but theyre vashwood if you get what i mean - i’ve also been subconsciously projecting vashwood onto these two considering fenrir calls aventurine “vasha/vash/vashu” while aventurine calls fenrir “that wolf/wolfy/dumb dog” and ive yet to realize that until very recently when i was writing something for fenrir that goes like “he valued life as others and he also bets it on me.” and i get reminded of “he feared death twice as others” and it just hits “ive been projecting vashwood onto these two oh my god”

fenrir cares for aventurine more than he wants to, but he does regardless.

"You should never ask anyone for anything. Never- and especially from those who are more powerful than yourself. They will make the offer and give it of their own accord."

It’s something that Fenrir live by, is that genuine help would come without the need for obligations afterwards. During Talia, Fenrir actively create scenarios around him that make people that he’s dependent on rely on him, out of obligations or respect. So whatever help Fenrir gives, he calculated them all so that they’d be beneficial “technically” to him.

Yet for certain individuals, those he love dearly such as Hermia, Boothill and Aventurine- He was willing to suffer a loss for them, which, for a person all for survival like Fenrir, is a tough decision to take. He broke his own ideals and virtues so that he could protect and satisfy these people, his family and he hates whenever he does that because it showed him that someone is having control over him and he’s at their mercy, which means they could just leave him and he’s very vulnerable to them. To put trust in these people so much that he’d voluntarily help them is like to trust them with his life.

i also like the concept of Talia recycling everything, even people considering some people would see that they’ve been “used” beyond so they were given a chance again. that’s why i felt like aventurine was suitable for this considering his past and his potential inferiority complex there.

the foundation between aventurine and fenrir relies on a lot of trust, and gamble as they could not read one another. it connects back to aventurine’s eidolons being game theories and avidity’s being about desires and non-co-operative game theories (one wins at expense of another while game theory is both party wins through trust and cooperation). fenrir’s eidolons are still in writing, but i want it to be based on 7 deadly sins or something, he does have a lot of religious references for the new lore rework.

fenrir was created before i know of aventurine, but i did tweaked a lot of things about him when aventurine came out. though the fundamentals still stayed, they were just made for each other rurururouuouogugh….

[whalesforhands]

HAII NYV!! hope ur doing well!!

tbh,, i’ve been thinking. How do you think SSS trio would feel about Dyf!mc going the same path suguru did? (Yk, seeing riko die and going spiraling to the point that she leaves jjt n stuffs,,) Do you think they would try and beg her to stay? Or would they let her go willingly because they’ve always wanted the best for Mc? Also, when they see each other after 11 years, Who sees her first?

tbh ive js been having brain rot of dyf so like…a million AUs are coming to me about it at once LMFAOO. but hope ure doing well, love ur writing xx

tw: yandere

lol why does ur spelling of name perfectly describe how it’s meant to be pronounced

what makes you think you’re even allowed to leave them behind like that? what makes you think you’re even able to leave them so freely?

you won’t survive out there on your own, are you just trying to die quicker? are you just trying to make them suffer just as much as you?

you’re in pain. they know, they know. you’ll get food placed outside your room’s locked door, have all 3 of them talk to you from outside too. sometimes it’s all 3 of them hanging around, sometimes it’s just 2, sometimes it’s just 1.

it’s gojo satoru that has had enough of your slump, kicking your door down with little to no effort as you flinch from shock, hiding under your blankets when you feel the dip of your mattress, and a head landing atop of your cocooned self, letting out a disappointed sigh.

“I didn’t wanna do that, ya know? You’re making things hard.”

it’s only then that he would lay down next to your form, an arm over your waist and spooning you from behind as you start to break down even harder, taking his intrusion and hoarding the comfort he gave you in this moment.

and your door’s been broken so many times you decided to just leave it unlocked… letting him and the others come and go as they please, letting him wrap his long arms around you at every given chance, letting him kiss you on the forehead every morning he gets to spend in school, telling you that he’ll be back from a mission soon.

maybe that was how it started.

“There are no missions for you, (last name).” Yaga’s scratching his head as he flips through his clipboard, carefully scanning the words.

“W-what? Why?” Your arms are shaky as you hug a Baby Panda close to yourself, soft purrs emanating from him as you pet him mindlessly. You’ve been loitering around in the campus for… Close to 3 months now.

“I’m quite confused as well. There haven’t been any curses within your grade level as of recently—“ He pauses as he flips through more papers, eyes narrowing behind dark sunglasses. “There just isn’t—“

“Then m-may I take one above my grade? T-that would put me on grounds for promotion, right?”

“You can, but there aren’t any sorcerers available to invigilate and recommend you for promotion anytime soon. Earliest I could find one is—“ The incessant flipping of papers stop.

“In about 6 months.”

ieiri shoko lets you roam around the school campus, watching you, talking to you, trying to improve your mental health. she prods you to speak your mind, convinces you that the world outside was the one that was going insane, that it wasn’t you that felt trapped, felt cornered in here.

“The campus is where you can be safe from such things. Don’t sweat it.”

and you believe her. why wouldn’t you? she’s your beloved shoko. shoko who teaches you how to do first aid when she notices how lost and listless you’re becoming, who teaches you how to treat wounds, how to stitch up open cuts, how to stop internal bleeding… all just to take up your time. she’s patient with you, holding your hands, letting you take tea breaks with her… it’s peaceful with her. you’re at ease.

so much better than being out on field, right?

geto suguru takes his time with you. he reads your favourite manga with you, asks you about the novels you have been eyeing and wanting to buy, talks about the soba noodles he had on that one trip to nagoya... hell, he’s the one who cooks food for you and helps you clean your room when he thinks you’re getting sloppy.

“Let me do it for you, okay? You’re not looking well enough to do it on your own.”

maybe that was when you thought to yourself that, maybe, just maybe… you didn’t want to leave this place.

though, if you still have some fight in you…

out of all three of them, the one who would most probably fold to your whims and let you leave is suguru. maybe when you go limp in his arms, break down crying into his chest, go quiet when he attempts to feed you…

or maybe it was that decisive kiss under the blankets of darkness, a show of your desperation and longing for something more than this that he starts to crack, starts to break. it’s then that he finally thinks that, maybe, perhaps, he needs to let you go. he’s always been quite the emotional one.

11 years of free roam? more like 11 years of surveillance. it’s not like you were allowed to go with no strings attached, you were still standing on soil that wasn’t Jujutsu Tech ground because they’re the ones who have given you this right.

they’re the ones who let you go have fun, even letting you get a job as a regular salary worker, let you get a quaint little apartment nearby, let you live the life of a regular person.

but no, oh no. you wanted to play hero again when you saw a little girl getting chased, hunted by a curse? wanted to save a life again because that’s what you could do? wanted to do?

And you got hurt from your decisions?

let’s just say you’re in for a bad time.

[untitledmemes]

Hazbin Hotel Prompts

Part IV An assortment of prompts taken from the series Hazbin Hotel on Amazon Prime. Adjust as necessary to fit pronoun and/or descriptor. In case of Multimuse, don't forget to specify which one/s. Reblog, please do not repost or add.

“ Where is miss fearless leader anyway? ”

“ Isn't it about time for another 'doomed to fail' plan? ”

“ Oh, you look an absolute mess. ”

“ I have enough on my mind without hearing your sadistic idea of a joke, asshole. ”

“ How can I face them after failing them all so hard? ”

“ I never expected to see such a miserable display of self loathing from you. ”

“ I don't know how you can enjoy all this suffering so much. ”

“ Just because you see a smile, don't think you know what's going on underneath. ”

“ I know something you don't know. ”

“ Then... Let's make a deal. ”

“ What's a favor between friends? ”

“ I didn't even know that was possible. ”

“ They say insane shit all the time. How was I supposed to know this one was true? ”

“ There's a friend of mine I think you should meet. ”

“ Oh, my, stars. Do my eyes deceive me? ”

“ I know you're an ace in the hole. ”

“ Oh, always such a charmer. ”

“ Wow. When you ask a favor, you don't start small, do you? ”

“ I like your moxie, girl. ”

“ We can talk about it inside or I can yell about it out here. ”

“ Clearly I am not the helpless one here. ”

“ Why wouldn't you use what you know to fight?. ”

“ It's not rocket science. ”

“ You fight like someone unafraid of harm, and this is what you'll take advantage of. ”

“ How has no one else figured this out? ”

“ You need a different type of motivation or there's no way that you can handle this. ”

“ We're going to need more weapons. ”

“ What do you do when someone you love lies to you about who they are? ”

“ Romance? My specialty. ”

“ It can be difficult to admit to things you're not proud of, especially if those things hurt the ones you love. ”

“ She's flawed. But, hey, who down here isn't? ”

“ Words are cheap. Actions, they speak the truth. ”

“ Have you ever wanted something that was so clear in your mind that you could taste it? ”

“ That's a little violent, can we tone it down? ”

“ I concur, stick with her, you'll be on the winning side. ”

“ I really hope that I'm ready for this. ”

“ I ain't finding no new drinking buddies. ”

“ Teamwork makes the dreamwork. ”

“ What in the hell are you supposed to be? ”

“ Look, I can't resist a fight, okay? ”

“ Here's to being alive today and not dying tomorrow. ”

“ I guess you have changed. ”

“ You are... Have always been a worthy opponent. ”

“ Destroy that ass! ”

“ Let the slaughter begin. ”

“ Trying to focus, sweetie. ”

“ I am so hard right now. ”

“ You should know better than anyone what a soul can accomplish when they take charge of their own fate. ”

“ I'm going to wipe that shit eating grin off your face. ”

“ This is better than sex! ”

“ Get somewhere safe. ”

“ You did good, buddy. ”

“ Look who thinks they're badass now. ”

“ You always were weak. ”

“ Ready to die rather than accepting mercy? No. Live. ”

“ Gotta say, you really let yourself go, buddy. ”

“ Don't forget, you're in my house, bitch! ”

“ How's mercy taste, you little bitch? ”

“ Take your little friends and go home! Please. ”

“ Come on, little lady, why the frown? ”

“ You can't quit now. Hell, you owe it. ”

“ Sorry to disappoint this is not where this ends. ”

“ Once I figure out how to unclip my wings, guess who will be pulling all the string. ”

“ Your deal is done, and I'm in charge now. ”

[d8tl55c]

y ' a l l . it took me multiple weeks to start working on a pony town skin <- real <- i made SIXTEEN other ones before the one i wanted

so now you're gonna look at them :D

behold! i bring you: disheveled TCO & rehabilitated TCO

it was a long journey to get here and every freaking detail has some personal lore about it- so if you want to see some progress shots ive chronicled them below X3

ok so 💕✨\o_🎉

the original plan was to: 0. go for a cho post-Showdown and pre-Box 1. use my existing spacescug colors (so i wouldn't get overwhelmed and stop) to create interesting gradients with the black, 2. dress them in.......... WHATEVER seemed cool at the time, and 3. have fun.

SO! i did. ~

(fun facts: the spacescug is one of the 16 skins i crafted while anxiety-ing over ava/m (sometimes ill use it to SNEAK AROUND and admire people (pls say hi lol <3 )))

features. i went with the fluffiest hair i could find, a starry mask for privacy, a comfy sweater, and my two pride and joys: firetail and transparency-skirt.

see look look it's supposed to be showing the legs on the other side of the fabric :D :D :D !!! and, if you look close, it's discreetly distracting from the big shackle i added to the left hind leg. (if you look REALLY close, you'll see i drew some grass in the "hole" of the head. this is why im so excited about this i went ALL IN ;v;;;;) (transparency-skirt ruled as a concept, but in the end it didn't make it any further through my TCOs)

okay so then i spot this character.

i instantly fell in love with the way they did their head (never before seen by me), and was inspired to refine my own work a little,,, so i would fit in more with them when we hung out.

i tore the sleeves off of the cozy sweater, added a Rocket-Brand™-lookin collar, and retired transparency-skirt.

i enjoyed this version so much i didn't change it until fall rolled around....

in which, while re-doing my whole catalog of fav skins to match the new ground color, i changed like 7 entire pixels of the design which i am not going to waste your scroll bar with. <3

now it's getting real.

one day, i needed a break from a thing and decided to dev some more accessories. i had an idea to strap down the wings with one of the feather outline colors and a Waist item, and that quickly spiraled into changing several many, many, more things.

speed round! extra features include:

firetail upgrade! ++shiny

+detail on right hind leg: scars? a tracking device maybe?

aforementioned wing restraint

right cozy sleeve ripped further to install the

Rocket™ wristband: that can't be good

hair accents match accessories and each other better

Back Mane changed for ++disheveled points

Ear accessory added for ++disheveled points

Ear type changed for more fluff back there

and as you can see i bit the bullet and tried to make an homage to my new friend's head style, and i found that these closed eyes (left) look like frowny cho-eyes. :3

AND THAT WAS AWESOME. i felt great. stylish, even. i sat there with an extra 10% deduction to needless social anxiety in my new threads.

and i thought, huh. i've made this little guy suffer, mentally and physically, for fifteen outfits now. what changes if they escape The Situation? and heal?

i pondered this for a while, but i didn't get the boost to act on it until i met this MVP.

they taught everyone on that day cool and funny pony-making tricks! and they're sweet.

from them i was inspired yet again ☝

and this time, i mixed in EVERYTHING. slowly untying the ropes, healing the scars, repairing the hair. the glasses trick that TDL taught me to get the more expressive eyes. the colors and patterning i learned from making a troodon skin (another of the 16) to re-dye the hair and add a new layer of striped pattern to the clothes. yellow with the red so it nods to TDL AND represents more fire. thE SLEEVES ripped ALL THE WAY OFF!!! YEAAAH SHUCK THAT ANGST I MADE THE MARKS BASED ON HOW YOUR CURSOR INVERTS IN WORD

WHAT IF INSTEAD OF RETURNING TO GREYS THEY START DRESSING IN LITTLE EXPLOSIONS OF COLOR •-|,=-||-•|-',=•-|"/, |'['-•-|_|<,['- [,-|'"/,/_',= '////////

and

that's it.

except for ofcourse the :V s :3333333

SO THAT'S THE STORY OF THIS

WOW, haha, thank you for coming on this journey with me. if you know more about pony town than me i am so taking suggestions- i am still learning and having a great time doing it!

TOODLES 💕