#all inferior names to my genius

[literaryvein-reblogs]

How do I write mean insults that's in character for a character to say? I'm personally poor at coming up with insults that don't sound generic or would actually cut deep, being mean in general. I want to write a snarky character with a dry sense of humour when it calls for it but don't know how to go about it.

He's also recovering from a superiority and inferiority complex.

As the writer, you know your character best, and what insults would make sense for them to say (also considering the bigger context of the scene). So, I'll just provide you with a compilation of prompts and notes from different sources, and you can choose which ones are most appropriate to incorporate in your story.

Writing Notes: Insults & Dry Humor

A List of "Sophisticated" Insults

Craven - having or showing a complete lack of courage; very cowardly

Fatuous - silly or stupid; complacently or inanely foolish. From Latin infatuate, which once meant "to make foolish," but which now usually means "to inspire with foolish love or admiration."

Insipid - not interesting or exciting; dull or boring

Obstreperous - difficult to control and often noisy

Obtuse - stupid or unintelligent; not able to think clearly or to understand what is obvious or simple

Pusillanimous - weak and afraid of danger. It's been used by such notables as Ralph Waldo Emerson ("It is a pusillanimous desertion of our work to gaze after our neighbours"), and the disgraced Vice-President Spiro Agnew, who called journalists "pusillanimous pussyfooters."

Sanctimonious - pretending to be morally better than other people. It once meant "possessing sanctity; holy, sacred." The genuinely holy aspect faded, and William Shakespeare is credited with first using sanctimonious to mean "hypocritically pious or devout."

Twee - sweet or cute in a way that is silly or sentimental. Just as buddy is believed to be a baby talk alteration of "brother", twee is a baby talk alteration of "sweet". Although twee is still considered a chiefly British term, it's increasingly popular in American English.

Unctuous - revealing or marked by a smug, ingratiating, and false earnestness or spirituality. Unction can mean "anointment" or it can name something used to anoint, such as a soothing or lubricating oil. That idea of oiliness led to unctuous, which can describe the slickness of false sincerity.

Vacuous - having or showing a lack of intelligence or serious thought; lacking meaning, importance, or substance

The insult would also depend on which other character it is directed at. Here is a list of "funny" insults for adults from Reader's Digest:

My days of not taking you seriously have come to a middle.

You are the human equivalent of a participation trophy.

If you were a spice, you’d be flour.

You may have a sparsely attended funeral.

I smell something burning. Are you trying to think again?

You’re like a lighthouse in a desert: bright but not very useful.

Don’t worry—the first 30 years of childhood are always the hardest.

May your life be as pleasant as you are.

You’re as useless as the “ueue” in “queue.”

Your face is just fine. It’s your personality that’s the issue.

...and for your character's significant other:

I like you. People say I have no taste, but I like you.

You continue to meet my expectations.

I’ll never forget the first time we met. But I’ll keep trying.

If genius skips a generation, our kids will be brilliant.

We were happily married for a month. Too bad it’s our 10-year anniversary.

I admire the way you try so hard.

You’re entitled to your incorrect opinion.

Have you tried doing it the way I told you to the first time?

The best part of watching a show with you is when you fall asleep because then I can watch my show.

Don’t call me crazy—you’re the one who married me!

You can always alter these to better suit your character. You can read the full list here, which also includes some insults for kids, best friends, and family.

Tips for Better Humor Writing

Humor writing isn’t all about landing a good joke (except for when it is). In creative writing, the effect is usually a bit more nuanced. Here’s a few writing techniques to get you started:

Subvert expectations. Try to undermine the audience’s expectations or reform them with structural elements.

Save the best for last. Humor is often a release of tension, so the sentence builds that tension, and the pay-off—the punchline—happens most naturally at the end. This is also sometimes referred to as the “rule of three,” where two thoughts act as a build-up to the final humorous closer.

Use contrast. Are your characters in a terrifying situation? Add something light, like a man obsessing about his briefcase instead of the T-Rex looming behind him.

Use good wordplay. Sometimes words themselves are funny, and just as often, their placement in a sentence can make a difference. Some words are just funnier than others, so make a list of those that amuse you the most.

Take advantage of cliché. While clichés are something most writers try to avoid, it’s important to recognize them,so you can use them to your advantage. Humor relies in part on twisting a cliché—transforming or undermining it. You do this by setting up an expectation based on the cliché and then providing a surprise outcome. In humor writing, this process is called reforming.

Use humor as a counterbalance. If you just pile on one terrible thing after another, it starts to become ridiculous, and people won’t buy it. Using humor is a great way to achieve the proper balance between fantasy and real life. Remember, if a roller coaster only did twists and turns the whole time, it wouldn’t be as fun to ride.

Level of Intensity

There are people who shrug off an insult (“That’s just the way she is”) and people who commit murder over an insult (“I’m avenging my honor!”). Plus, of course, everything in between. Which is your character?

To be believable, consider the following:

Personality. How hard does your character take events in general? Does s/he get really excited over good fortune and really depressed over setbacks? Then we’ll find it believable that s/he gets really angry and reacts accordingly.

The second cause of an intense reaction is the nature of the specific fight that you’re creating on the page. Lily Owens lets most of her father’s insults go by (“the art of survival”). But when he starts in about her mother, the topic is too important to Lily to gloss over. Lily’s reaction is intense. She runs away. Another type of character might merely have seethed silently. Still another might have fought T. Ray more intensively, setting fire to the house with him inside.

Finally, the strength of fights is culturally determined. Where public or even private scenes are disapproved of (upper-class London, old-money Boston, “well-behaved” families), arguments may be muted, even when the subject matters a great deal. In other cultures, volatility is not frowned on, and people may feel free to scream at each other in public. In extreme cases, murder may even be considered a duty, as in avenging a sister’s sexual assault.

Where is your story taking place? Are your arguers in tune with local or family culture? Maybe not. You can create interesting effects by portraying the rebels against the local mores: the meek child born into a battling family, the furious feminist in polite 19th-century English society.

On Dry Humor

Dry humor - is all about the subtle irony of the facts being stated plainly; it is the contrast between sentiment and reality that makes the situation funny.

The technique is known for its simple, often matter-of-fact declarations that will make the audience laugh or be perplexed (humor is subjective, after all).

With dry humor, delivery and intention create a sort of comedic cognitive dissonance or contrast. Sometimes it is as simple as using a bit of sarcasm, but it can also be more than that.

Dry humor lives and dies on the back of doing less.

Less facial expressions, less props, less setup—less is often more when it comes to landing the joke. You aren’t using a big, dramatic setup or a grandiose vocabulary to make your point.

Essentially, these jokes are derived from saying the opposite of what is meant or delivering them in a way that purposefully counteracts the supposed meaning of what is being said.

Dry Humor in Writing

The function of dry humor has often been to highlight the absurd.

It is effectively executed in moments where satirization of the circumstances at play require little more than noting the facts aloud.

When writing this sort of humor, quick, cutting accuracy is key to making the jokes land.

Simplicity is king, and an honest statement of the facts will always lead the way to finding the funny.

Sources: 1 2 3 4 5 ⚜ More: References ⚜ Humour ⚜ Laughter & Humour

Hope this helps with your writing!

[marybeatriceofmodena]

What did Andrew Lloyd Webber do to make Patti Lupone upset? Sorry, saw your tags and i was curious

Oh.

Oh honey.

You sweet child.

Anyway, get ready for one of the most infamous showdowns in all musical theatre history, with the guy who writes the straightest musicals on Broadway (derogatory) and the one and only, the matriarch, the queen, two three-time Tony award winner Patti LuPone.

So, Andrew Lloyd Webber was basically kind of a boy genius in his prime - he met his future collaborator Tim Rice when they were 17 and 20 respectively, he wrote his first big hit, Jesus Christ Superstar, at 22, with Tim Rice writing the lyrics. And it was kind of a big deal at the time because the topic was controversial (you know, the Passion with rock music), but also because Broadway wasn't that far off from its golden age and let's just say the music and style were very different from, say, My Fair Lady. Or The Sound of Music. Or Funny Girl. It was basically the Rent/Hamilton of its time. (Yeah, Stephen Sondheim was around at that time, he worked on West Side Story which was revolutionary in of itself, but he's kind of an oddball in this case. You'll understand why later.)

Their real follow up (I'm not counting Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat for a variety of reasons) was a little musical called Evita, which you might know mainly because of a song called Don't Cry For Me Argentina. Or at least, your mom has probably heard it once at the very least. It's that song that's oversung from a musical while being out of context along with I Dreamed a Dream for Les Misérables. Or Memory from Cats.

Evita tells the story of Eva Peron, the wife of an Argentinian dictator, who basically screws her way to the top and ends up becoming the mistress of Juan Peron and the most beloved woman in her country through guile and deceit. Yes, I know the historical accuracy is very much debated but I know jackshit about Argentina's history except the bare basics so don't come at me. It was first produced in the West End in London, with Elaine Paige in the role, but because of Equity issues, she couldn't reprise her role for the Broadway production. So a Julliard graduate who was mostly starring in David Mamet plays got the part instead, and that was Patti LuPone.

Patti... did not have a good time during Evita, because the part is basically the kind of score where you can tell the composer is used to writing male parts, but most female singers have a two-octave range (yes, you got Julie Andrews who used to have a three-octave range, and many others, but they're exceptions), so she struggled a lot. That being said, if you listen to live recordings of her, you wouldn't be able to tell, and it got a lot easier later on. But she had this to say:

"Evita was the worst experience of my life. I was screaming my way through a part that could only have been written by a man who hates women. And I had no support from the producers, who wanted a star performance onstage but treated me as an unknown backstage. It was like Beirut, and I fought like a banshee."

This is from Patti's autobiography, which she wrote in 2007 - 8 years after shit with ALW went down. With all that said, she won a Tony Award for Evita, and she pretty much became a musical theatre household name from then on. She played Fantine in Les Misérables, Nancy in Oliver!, Reno Sweeney in Anything Goes. Meanwhile, ALW's next big hits were Cats (I'm not even kidding, Cats was a hit), and, you guessed it, The Phantom of the Opera, which he wrote in part to showcase his then wife Sarah Brightman's triple threat talents.

So, you need to understand before I continue that ALW, from my perspective, has always had a bit of an inferiority complex. He's basically associated to writing these commercially successful musicals that show a big spectacle but aren't ultimately substantial. I'm not sure I entirely agree with that, but I do think that if he didn't have Hal Prince, Maria Bjornson, Charles Hart and Gillian Lynne backing him up for Phantom, it would have probably been a Rocky Horror Picture Show knockoff people would have forgotten about pretty quickly. This is what I mean:

Yep, that was Phantom before any of the people I mentioned above (and Michael Crawford) were really involved.

Remember how I said Stephen Sondheim was an oddball? The thing with him is that his musicals weren't always commercially successful, but in general, in part thanks to being Leonard Bernstein's protégé, he was generally pretty well-respected and it was considered that his work was bringing musicals to a whole other level. Without Sondheim, you wouldn't have Jonathan Larson, and you wouldn't have Lin-Manuel Miranda. I am convinced ALW is resentful of that, and when you stop and think about it for more than 10 seconds, it's so obvious he REALLY wants to be Sondheim or at least command the same level of respect, but that's a story for another day.

So, after Phantom, ALW had other musicals that followed that either got a meh reception or outright flopped. Then there was Sunset Boulevard, which is based on the movie of the same name with Gloria Swanson. Despite all of her griefs for Evita, Patti LuPone agreed to partake in the musical as Norma Desmond, for its production in London, with the promise that she would transfer to Broadway once that production would open. And overall, after a string of flops, Sunset was actually doing pretty well.

HOWEVER. One day, while reading the gossip column of a newspaper, Patti found out that contrary to what she was promised, Glenn Close, who was meanwhile starring as Norma in the Los Angeles production, was to play Norma on Broadway. That was a complete surprise for her since no one on the production team had bothered to tell her it was happening - and keep in mind that for the news to come up the way it did in a gossip column, it probably would have necessitated a delay of a few weeks between the producers and the newspaper, which would have given them plenty of time to break the news to Patti. And Patti kind of needed the leg up because she was pretty bitter that a) Madonna was cast in the Evita adaptation instead of her; b) they actually lowered the key to fit Madonna's voice range, and she still had to expand her own to be able to sing the (lowered) score. And trust me, Patti is mad about it to this day.

So of course, she trashed her dressing room, the cast and crew weren't even mad about it because they were as shocked and angered as she was by the news. Patti sued Andrew Lloyd Webber for breach of contract, namely for 1 MILLION DOLLARS (yup, those are the real numbers), won, used the money she got from the lawsuit to get a swimming pool, which she called (and I SHIT YOU NOT) the Andrew Lloyd Webber Memorial Pool. Since then, Webber is dead to her, to the point rumor has it she had part of a building blocked during an event so she could get out of it without coming across Webber, because she hates him so flipping much she doesn't even want to be in the same building as the guy.

(There's also drama that happened with Faye Dunaway who was supposed to replace Glenn Close after she went from Los Angeles to Broadway, except they abruptly closed the show down after Close left, but that's a story for another day)

So with all the bad press, and with ALW forced to pay 1 million dollars for Patti's lawsuit, that led Sunset's productions to close earlier than expected. ALW has stayed around since, with... mitigated output, so to say. The lowest point for a lot of people is Love Never Dies, the sequel to Phantom, which some people love, and that's fine, but it didn't do well with either critics nor fans of the original show, which ALW is EXTREMELY BUTTHURT ABOUT. And like, there are so many stories I could tell about LND alone, but I will share my own crack theory about it, since it does relate to the ask.

Anyway, buckle up.

So. There have been jokes going around for years that the Phantom in LND is basically ALW's self-insert, where he displays to the world that he's totally not over Sarah Brightman leaving him (in part because making Phantom kinda ruined their marriage lmao), despite, you know, having married since. (Aaaaaakward.) So LND basically becomes this really uncomfortable therapy session where a man writes a self-insert musical about how his ex-wife made a big mistake of leaving a sensitive artistic soul such as himself. The characters from Phantom who appear in LND are all more or less unrecognizable as a result, and one who gets it worse (in my humble opinion) is Meg Giry, who was basically Christine's sweet and loyal ballerina friend who basically went into the Phantom's lair on her own to save her friend despite the danger. In LND, she's basically a bitter hag (because ALW hates women, guess Patti was right about that), who really likes the swim and even has a stripping vaudeville number about it, written in universe by the Phantom, no less.

For comparison, here's Don Juan Triumphant (the Phantom's opera in the original):

And here's Bathing Beauty (the vaudeville number):

Yeah, so... do you see why people hate LND already?

And that's not the only thing with Meg! She's also pining for the Phantom to pay attention to her and threatens to drown the Phantom and Christine's secret love child when he makes it clear that he's gonna love Christine for EVA AND EVA.

So, with everything we learned today about ALW, would someone like him view someone like Patti LuPone as some sort of crazy, bitter diva who's obsessed with him for whatever reason? Absolutely. Would he be petty enough to insert Patti LuPone into his self-insert musical, which gave us the version of Meg Giry we got in LND? Of course. Why does Meg love to swim so much and why does she drag Gustave out ostensibly for a swim? Is it a dig at Patti's Andrew Lloyd Webber Memorial Pool? Maybe.

I kind of hope we find out one day if that theory is true. And maybe start a kickstarter so Patti can add this painting from the 2004 movie in her collection.

Fun fact: during the process of casting for the 2004 movie adaptation of POTO, ALW allegedly suggested Patti LuPone to play Carlotta... only for Joel Schumacher to have to awkwardly remind him that they were not on speaking terms. The idea was therefore promptly dropped.

[nileqt87]

Jamie McCrimmon in Tales of the TARDIS

The most special thing that's come out of Doctor Who in years. But the most important return for me will always be Frazer Hines as Jamie McCrimmon. I want him back in a full episode. His story is so rich for a return that could only involve the Doctor (and/or the TARDIS), as well as not only having clear parallels to Donna Noble's mind wipe, but also being the Classic companion who most meant it that he'd never have left the Doctor willingly and would've followed him until the end.

For the record, this Jamie was the inspiration for Jamie Fraser (note the actor's first name being Frazer) in Outlander, as The War Games (my favorite Classic serial) was what Diana Gabaldon was watching when she came up with her idea, which is arguably Doctor Who fanfiction that 'ships time-traveling highlander Jamie McCrimmon with that serial's WWI nurse, Lady Jennifer. Frazer Hines is well aware of being the inspiration and even cameo'd.

Jamie was not only the longest-serving companion in Doctor Who history (yes, even more episodes than the Brigadier, though Sarah Jane beats him with her spinoff) with his 116 episodes (1966-1969, 1983 and 1985) and this short (2023), but he's also one of the greatest examples of the Doctor's closest and most-beloved companions not necessarily being chosen for being the most "equal" (the idea that companions from humble or easily-belittled beginnings like Jamie, Jo, Leela, Rose, Donna, etc…, who all struggled with insecurity over their worth due to their backgrounds, are his intellectual inferiors and thus not as worthy or appropriate as non-human companions like Romana or River, or even human genius Zoe here, for the Doctor to love--which is an insult to the Doctor and what he fell in love with humanity for), but for being the most human, genuine, loyal and loving as well as brave. This is one thing that Russell T Davies understood so well and Steven Moffat didn't quite get.

Jamie was hardly afraid to call the Doctor out when he disagreed or thought the Doctor had callously gone too far, by the way. Just watch/listen to The Evil of the Daleks for that, which is where the Doctor manipulates Jamie's very humanity to get him to rescue Victoria from the Daleks along with him being the source of the "human factor" used to create human-Dalek hybrids. Jamie's desperate, heartbroken, unrequited reaction (sadly, reduced to just audio, which captures the sound of a kiss) to Victoria's departure likewise puts to bed the idea that sentimental emotionalism and the Doctor dealing with companion reactions at their most human began in the Russell T Davies era.

Jamie certainly was more of a skirt chaser, albeit quite innocent, than you'd assume would be depicted in Classic Who! As much as Ian and Barbara, and then Ben and Polly, were depicted as couples in the TARDIS, they never got such an explicit declaration of feelings as Jamie's in Fury from the Deep.

Jo is the Classic companion who arguably admitted to having feelings for the Doctor himself, describing Cliff Jones as a younger version of the Doctor for why she's choosing him. These shorts allude to this moment as well, though frame it in retrospect as Jo having chosen Cliff over the Doctor, despite her arguably having more of a basis for feelings towards the Doctor than Sarah Jane in School Reunion and her inability to move on (highlighted beautifully when she walked down the aisle alone after her wedding day betrayal, only to be comforted by the Doctor, not to mention her adopting all the children she never had), which made her a mirror to Rose's future. Jo is thus a mirror to Sarah Jane as the companion arguably in love with the Doctor in a not-so-platonic way who moved on and found real love vs. one who didn't move on until it was too late, and who was likewise a mirror to Rose, who is famous for being the companion most explicitly in love with the Doctor to the extent that her moving on involved ending up with the Doctor's Metacrisis (but ultimately choosing him, their daughter Mia and a human life over the Eighth and Eleventh Doctors in Empire of the Wolf).

The Second Doctor's favoritism of Jamie extended so far as to go back for him (quite rare for the Doctor) when he was forced to work for the Time Lord Celestial Intervention Agency (season 6b, which isn't so much a theory anymore) and the reaction towards Jamie was probably the most cuddly and warm the Sixth Doctor (to the extent that the turbulent relationship with Peri got a little better for that one serial because of Jamie's presence) sadly ever got on screen before Big Finish salvaged the era. Jamie always brings out of the best in the Doctor and what the Doctor loves humanity the most for.

That Frazer Hines was so genuinely close to Patrick Troughton in real life (they were quite the mischievous pair, often sneaking gags in past the censors in addition to their pranks!) comes across so beautifully in every voice impression of his old friend and through his portrayal of Jamie whose love for and wish to have never left the Doctor is unquestionable.

Obviously, there was that fear of what he had left to return to, but also his belief that he needed to be there to protect the Doctor, which he always took it upon himself to do. Jamie would no doubt get along very well with the Brigadier (whose first story was with Jamie), Leela and Ace in their willingness towards protective violence, not to mention Ian and Rory often facing having to fill that role a little more reluctantly. And most of all, one of the deepest, most-loving friendships among Doctor and companion. Yes, there is exactly one iteration of the Doctor whose closest, most-favorite companion (that tendency towards favoritism was already there) was unambiguously not any of the female ones and was an even firmer break from the Doctor's old model of replacing his granddaughter with a relationship that felt far more like friends/partners in crime with a hint of fatherliness or mad uncle. And of course, this twin mop-topped Odd Couple fit in nowhere. Jamie was as out-of-place and "alien" as the Doctor wherever the TARDIS landed.

And given where he was sent back to by the Time Lords, his future without his memories looked pretty dire. His immediate return involved being being shot at, hanged, put on a slave ship by the Redcoats or fleeing to France--which was the context of his situation when the Doctor saved his life and he walked into the TARDIS when he was a piper from the Battle of Culloden in 1746 who could neither swim or read, and who was as likely to call an airplane a "flying beastie" as calling a Cyberman "the Phantom Piper", and then was returned to that sans all memories but for his first adventure before entering the TARDIS.

Obviously, Russell T Davies has given Jamie quite a happier ending than his tragic comic fate in The World Shapers in which old Jamie has finally gotten his memories back, but his family (he married Kirsty McLaren, daughter of the laird whom he was a humble, orphaned piper for, from The Highlanders) has abandoned him over it and he rapidly ages to death in sacrifice. The Tenth Doctor also had a comic companion named Heather McCrimmon (descended from those five daughters, but still retains the surname!) who still carried her ancestor's Artron radiation energy from the TARDIS. I would love to see Jamie meet Heather, who would be awesome to see realized on screen.

[playertwotails]

Per the poll I put out I'm gonna ramble about how Tails displays his genius vs how Eggman does.

It's long so under the cut it goes

We'll start with Eggman. Now Eggman clearly has a complex. He's talked about being compared to Maria his whole life which has made him want a lot of attention. Which a valid feeling but then Eggman being Eggman takes it to the ^nth degree.

See he has to make sure EVERYONE knows how smart he is. He plasters his face over everything he makes, names everything after himself to some degree, and is loud bragging all the time about his latest greatest creation and everyone being inferior to him and his genius.

He's gonna make sure that people recognize him and what he's done no matter what.

With this mindset, all of his creations are only for the benefit of he, himself and no one else. Every invention he creates falls under 3 categories.

Expanding the Eggman Empire

Kill Sonic

Or both

Even when he has "allies" he very rarely gives them any of his inventions unless they directly benefit himself (hello start of the Zombot arc). His selfishness and self importance has him only making things that fuel his own desires and wants.

On the flip side of this though we have Tails.

Now Tails also has houses that look like him and has his own logo (and I'll get into that a little later). But in contrast to Eggman Tails doesn't brag much about his creations. He'll be proud of them and talk about them but never in a condescending manner.

(Side note: off the top of my head I think the only times we may have seen a slightly more condescending tone is a few times when he's talking to Sonic but it always came off as more of a "little sibling being a little shit" kinda tone)

Tails showing his friends his inventions is never in a "Look how much better than you I am cause I made this" kinda way. It's always felt more like a kid showing people their macaroni art cause they're proud they were able to make it. (which he is 8 so def fits lol)

And half the time his inventions are for the benefit of not only himself but all their friends, allies and just other people in general. He makes things to share and help improve what people already have to make their lives easier/safer. I mean look what he did to Sonic's plane. and their communication devices.

Now onto my next point: Quality over Quantity

So switching back to Eggman, he gets so focused on making these massive armies and sprawling cities/bases with his face plastered and designed into everywhere he's not gonna be able to do that by himself. So most of his creations are made in production lines not by his own hands.

Most of the time when we see Eggman he's not making something he's at a control panel directing things to be made. He's very hands off with the majority of his own creations with the exception of his more one of a kind creations like Metal Sonic.

Meanwhile we see Tails is always fiddling with things, taking them apart, and improving them, sometimes it's Eggman's own creations Tails messes with. Tails is typically shown to be very hands on. And yeah his house and inventions have his logo or face on them but their all one of a kind, hand crafted creations not massive bases that go on for miles (lol). So it feels more like a signature than an announcement like Eggman's does.

Now bringing this all together it comes down to the one person Tails is boastful to and constantly saying their not as smart as him --- Eggman.

Now, Eggman on multiple occasions has recognized how smart Tails is but we rarely if ever (off the top of my head) see Tails saying the same about Eggman.

Most of the time Tails is roasting him about shoddy craftsmanship and how Eggman's plans are dumb. One thing I've noticed too is we always see Tails hacking and messing with Eggmans tech but we've never really seen the reverse as far as I can recall.

Heck we've seen multiple time Tails taking apart Eggman's machines and talking about how weird and unorganized all his bots insides. We've seen Tails casually hack into Eggman's networks in the middle of fights.

Which brings us back to the quality over quantity thing. Because Eggman's armies and bases are mass produced mostly at this point so the craftsmanship quality goes down. Eggman is a genius for sure but even if his designs are great since he's not behind every robot creating them, his own genius suffers. He's too busy trying to make it big and loud that what's actually produced it of a lesser quality.

And then we have Tails who is one on one with all his creations and that makes them harder for Eggman to destroy cause Tails can personally check everything is up to snuff for all his inventions. (meanwhile too Tails rips Eggman's robots apart for extra screws probably)

I just think that it's very funny that while Eggman goes to great lengths to show the whole world he's smarter than everyone else, Tails just needs Eggman to know he's smarter then him.

[katcadecascade]

If you believe the lies I tell

This is a preview chapter of my self-indulgent Snowjanus fic. Some of it has been edited to conceal some other stuff I have already wrote. For the entirety of the fic, I am still writing it and once it is completed is when I'll start posting to Ao3.

That will definitely take a while so I wanted to at least share this fun chapter as a new years special.

-

Coriolanus has to formulate a plan on what to stash away from the dining hall, anything to join the muffin intended for Tigris. He has to make backup plans after backup plans if Clemensia ever interferes. This is all he can think about during their class before lunch hour. 

Their calculus lesson had to take a pause for their professor to receive documents from the ink and printer room. Urban Canvill, top student of the subject, was asked to assist. 

“And there he goes, our calculus genius,” Gaius mourns like a nurse bidding a soldier farewell. 

Apollo taps a pencil on his textbook, “I swear there is a calculator in his head, it’s the only explanation.” 

“Or you’re bad at math,” Diana teased. 

“Hey, I scored higher than you last I checked.”

“Well, twins, you’re both beneath me,” Arachne butted in, believing she was always a part of the conversation.

“Okay, can we just all agree we hate math,” Domitia said.

“Minus Urban Canville,” Festus winked. “Get it? Minus?”

Only Persephone Price laughed. 

Gaius fake-yelled, “Boo! Get off the stage!”

“I’ll be here all week, folks!”

“Besides, I don’t think anyone is gonna out calculate Urban,” Florus said, tapping a pencil on Apollo’s head. 

Diana had to interfere before the boys started sword fighting with their stationary. 

“Really? That’s quite the statement.”

No one expected such a mocking tone from Sejanus. 

Coriolanus feels his eyes burning at the rich boy. He gives the attention no mind, soaking in the way their classmates stare curiously or irritatedly.  

“I’m surprised that none of you have tried hard enough to beat Urban’s score.”

“Excuse you,” Vipsania stands up and points at the mocker, “I am one of the top ranked students here.”

“That doesn’t sound like you’re actually the top student. We all know that’s Coriolanus.”

Eyes flicker to him and Coriolanus burns at the way Sejanus said his name. He’s using his name to further make their classmates inferior. 

It’s a brag, is his delayed thought. It’s equally a praise. 

Coriolanus still refuses to visibly acknowledge Sejanus, so he turns to Clemensia, “Do you have any idea what’s going on? It sounds like a mess.”

She tuts, as if she’s a disappointed mother, “They are a mess.” 

While that further infuriates most of their classmates, besides her, Lysistrata giggles at Clemensia. The girls exchange more laughter, like they’re sharing an inside joke. Coriolanus merely raises an eyebrow at her, surprised that Clemensia’s partaking in the biting comments. 

“They can still clean up their act.” 

Sejanus commands everyone’s attention back to him. 

It’s effortlessly done. 

Coriolanus wonders where Sejanus learned to say all the right words. To manipulate the crowd. It’s the opposite of what Coriolanus does. 

Coriolanus Snow charms the audience to keep everything in order. 

Sejanus Plinth riles up the audience for chaos.

“The upcoming calculus test.” He scans his audience, yet somehow skips over Coriolanus. Air is trapped in Coriolanus’ lungs. “Anyone who replaces Urban Canville’s number one spot gets a Plinth prize of my own.” That gets people to mutter about but once again, Sejanus shuts them up. “Not money, that’ll be real boring. I’m offering up a favor.” 

“What are you on about?” Arachne scoffed, “We don’t need anything from-“

“Shush!” Festus nearly throws his body on top of her desk, shoving a single finger against Arachne’s red lips. “Let the man bake!”

Persephone corrects, “Don’t you mean cook?”

“Yes!” 

His enthusiasm is uninterrupted when Felix strong-arms him off the desk. Festus straightens up and behind him, everyone ignores Arachne dramatically gagging into a napkin that Felix passed her. 

Festus explains, “He’s right, we don’t need his money but making Sejanus Plinth do whatever we want? Now that’s a real prize!”

Persephone winces, “You’re making it sound cruder than it would be, Festus.” 

He winks at her, “Only if you think that way.” 

Besides them, Arachne and Domitia shared appalled, mocking faces. 

“Actually, I'm with him on this. It would be interesting to see Sejanus hold his end of the bargain.” Felix Ravinstill approaches Sejanus Plinth, “Anything we ask?”

“Don't make him do anything illegal,” Persephone warns, proving that she really is the nicest girl in class. “That’ll be too far.”

“We’re not that chaotic, can’t let our families find out after all,” Their class president assures her with a smile, but to Sejanus it is anything but warm. “But, Sejanus, don’t think it’ll be anything simple.”

“I would hope not,” he smiles and reaches out a hand.

The most politically rich boy shakes hands with the richest outsider of all of the Capitol. 

A deal has been struck. 

“Sejanus, why are you doing this to Urban?” Gaius asked, so far the only one willing to defend Urban. 

“I’m not doing this to Urban, this is about all of you.” False gratitude has never sounded so much like a threat before. Sejanus has them all eating out of his palm. “Prove that you really are the best and brightest of the Capitol. Also why not have some fun with academic rivalry.”

“I hate calculus, but I admit I’m intrigued,” Apollo grins even though his twin elbows him roughly. 

“This is what finally gets you to take math seriously?”

“Hey, I’d love to win something. After all, it’s gonna be Coriolanus who wins the actual Plinth Prize.”

A few heads turn to the leading candidate for the scholarship money. 

He only has mere seconds to decide what mask he has to wear. Anything to maintain the image of the perfect Snow. 

“Do you really think that Apollo?” Coriolanus performs with a million dollar smile, “Well, one more test to ace isn’t a real problem for me.”

Now that raises everyone’s ego. The chance to take something away from the untouchable Coriolanus Snow. 

He sees in the way Arachne whispers to Felix. As Florus and Apollo immediately plan a study session that Diana of course invites herself in. Coriolanus despises them a little bit more. They just had to prove his thoughts right. 

Everyone in this school feeds off of others’ failures. 

Urban Canville, the challenge, no - the obstacle, arrives and the tension in the room shifts. 

“Why’s everyone staring at me?” 

“We’re just talking about calculus, buddy,” Festus is instantly at his side, very touchy-feely, roping an arm around Urban’s neck, “and how you’re so good at it.” 

Behind Urban’s back, Festus glares at everyone to not snitch. It's mostly aimed at Gaius who does concede. Class resumes without a hitch. 

Coriolanus has to wait until everyone leaves before confronting the most annoying person in his life. Clemensia needed to be placated with a promise of not taking too long, that he’ll catch up later. 

When it’s just them, there’s no more performances. 

“What the hell was all of that?”

Sejanus squirms in his chair, finally acting like his usual, uncomfortable self. 

Seeing this just makes Coriolanus angrier. 

If this guy can behave two-faced so easily, manipulate their classmates, how is Coriolanus’ own mask believable?

He has the urge to pace around, think of better ways to lie, to analyze how exactly their classmates were suckered in by Sejanus. As suspicious as his actions were, they only focused on their own world. 

Pride on the verge of narcissism. 

It was too well played out but it was enough to pique their interest. Coriolanus would be impressed if not for his irritation over Sejanus. Specifically about how he knows Sejanus better than anyone else. 

And right now, Sejanus knows him better than anyone Coriolanus has allowed. 

He stays rooted in front of Sejanus, needing to figure out what’s exactly in his head. 

Sejanus bites his lip, for once considering his words. If only he was always like this. 

“Sejanus,” the name is harsh on his tongue, “tell me, now.”

The command should make him feel powerful, from just the way the he looks up at Coriolanus. But those brown eyes full of pity sends poison down his veins. 

It almost makes Coriolanus squirm, targeted under the weight of Sejanus’ undivided attention. 

“It was the only way I could think of to-”

“To give me food?” His pride takes over, already regretting this conversation. “You’re telling me that you proposed some idiotic bet for all your enemies on the chance that I would accept your generosity?”

He expects Sejanus to lie to him. Or say something absurd like he’s doing this out of the kindness of his heart. How Sejanus’ sense of judgment and righteousness demands to treat Coriolanus like this. 

That’s a terrifying relationship. Coriolanus refuses to be an object that sits pretty for every compliment, to receive a feast for doing absolutely nothing. 

“Yes, I did.” Something just clicks behind those brown eyes and Sejanus’ expression hardens. “You said it yourself, you’re not spoiled. Coriolanus, you’re hard working and twice as stubborn than everyone else.” He stands up, preparing to leave with his bag slung over his shoulder. “You don’t have to win this competition though, that’s up to you.”

He sees it and he hates it. 

Sejanus is trying to rile him up, trap him into admitting that he has something that Coriolanus Snow needs. 

As if. 

“I don’t want handouts.”

“This isn’t a handout. This is a choice.”

He is right. Coriolanus could choose to not partake in zealous efforts of reaching the top. 

But it is not in his nature to lie down and let his competitors gain what he deserves. 

Coriolanus deflects, “So you made a spectacle? That doesn’t sound like you, Sejanus.”

“I’m just speaking your language.” At Coriolanus’ scoff, a reflex to mask his confusion, Sejanus steps closer. He lays a hand on Coriolanus’ arm. “I know you can beat everyone in this class. Do what you do best, Coriolanus Snow. Be at the top.”

An exhilarating thrill buzzes throughout Coriolanus Snow. 

He does not need Sejanus Plinth’s permission. 

It’s natural for the sun to shine brighter than the stars.

For the ocean to knock down sandcastles. 

For snow to land on top. 

The real Plinth Prize waits at graduation day.

But today?

His classmates saw a chance, no matter how small, to best him. It’s maddening to have a target on his back but at the same time, Coriolanus welcomes them to try. Eager to see them all fall. Graduation and university is too far away. After seeing their glimmer of hope, he craves their defeat now. 

This is more than a predator nature or survival instincts born from starvation. This is what Coriolanus truly greeds for. To actually feel like the top of a mountain peak. 

Anyone else would tear at him with teeth and claws, exposing this bloody animal he locks under a perfect mask. Yet with Sejanus it’s a scalpel, a clean cut. 

In an impossible way, Coriolanus feels seen. Layers of flesh exposed and undone, revealing a hungry creature, a void that will devour. 

Beyond status or wealth, Corionlaus Snow can and will dominate any who opposes him. 

It’s a taste of something better than any food served on a silver platter. 

All provided by one Sejanus Plinth. 

He gives Sejanus one last glare before storming out of the room. 

-

Thanks for reading!

[marvelfanfn2187a113]

Hey guys! It’s been a while but I’m currently obsessed with the BBC Sherlock and was struck with this idea for a tword fic, so here I am.

Warnings: literally none lol, I guess hurt feelings (Sherlock’s a bit of a jerk at first) and tword?

Sherlock x teen sister reader

Holmes Sweet Holmes

Y/N Holmes was about to throw her Pre-Calculus book into the wall. Considering her brother Sherlock had previously shot bullet holes in it, she didn’t see how she could get in trouble for it. She was just about to pick up the book when-

“Are you still working on those problems?” Sherlock asked absentmindedly as he strolled into apartment 221B.

“Yup. Help?” She pleaded. It was not often that she asked her Genius brother for help, she never wanted to distract him from a case, but she had a test tomorrow and had barely gotten any sleep this past week trying to understand the concepts, and she still couldn’t work them out.

“I’m busy,” he responded airily.

John, sitting in his chair by the fireplace, cleared his throat—his sign to Sherlock to remind him to be nice to his little sister.

Sherlock groaned “oh alright,” and snatched up Y/N’s math book. She grinned widely.

“Thanks, Shock.”

Sherlock gave her a sideways glare, and John looked up from his paper, “you know, you never did explain where that nickname came from.”

Before Y/N could explain, Sherlock huffed out a response.

“When my dear sister was learning to talk, she could not wrap her tongue around two syllable words, and Shock was all she could get out. Now, though she is practically grown and fully capable of pronouncing my full name, she chooses to remain with the nickname.”

“I see,” John smirked and went back to his paper.

…

It was a full two hours later that Sherlock’s impatience really began to heat up.

“This is a very simple equation, Y/N, I don’t see how it’s still confusing you.”

Y/N’s cheeks turned bright red, and she rubbed her bleary eyes as she tried to focus on the paper.

“I just don’t understand why-“

“If you don’t understand at this point, there’s really no reason to try to further explain. You clearly cannot grasp the concept no matter how simply I explain it.”

“I-I just-“

“Even Mycroft, though he was not nearly as good at these subjects as me, had Calculus down easily when he was years younger than you.”

Y/N bit the inside of her lip hard to keep it from quivering. She wouldn’t be able to hold her tears back for long, she knew, so she closed her math book and gathered her homework sheets, keeping her eyes averted from her big brother’s.

“Yeah, ok. Thanks for trying Sherlock.”

And she rushed to her room, closing her door before finally allowing her tears to fall.

…

“She’s not Mycroft, you know.”

Sherlock ran a hand over his face before turning to look at John. “What are you talking about?”

“Y/N. She’s not Mycroft.”

“Yes John, that much is very clear.”

“Well then don’t treat her like Mycroft.”

Sherlock frowned “I’m not following you.”

John groaned and threw down his paper. “Don’t be so thick. You and she both know that she doesn’t have the genius mind of either you or Mycroft. She’s not a superhuman, and you’re not in competition with her the way you are your brother.”

“Why would you want me to treat her differently just because she’s normal?”

John glared at his friend. “Because when you and Mycroft belittle each other, you’re really only knocking your egos down a peg. When you belittle Y/N, you’re just kicking her when she’s already down, and I’m sick of it. She’s too sweet, she doesn’t deserve that, and growing up with geniuses for brothers I’m sure she already feels inferior as it is.”

Sherlock hesitated before dubiously attempting to see the situation the way John did, or perhaps the way Y/N did. It didn’t take him long to come to the conclusion that John was right.

“Sherlock?”

“Alright then. Fine, you win, I’ll ease up on her in the future.”

John rolled his eyes “Now. Don’t wait for the future, go in there now and talk to her.”

Sherlock sighed “alright, perhaps I will.”

…

Sherlock knocked gently on the door. Y/N quickly tried to rub the tears off her face and her math book.

“Just a minute!”

The door swung open and Sherlock strode into the room.

Y/N ducked her head, letting her hair veil her face “Sherlock I didn’t say come in.”

“No, you didn’t, and I know why,” he hesitantly reached his hand up and brushed her hair behind her ears, revealing her tear stained face. “I know I’m not the best with emotion, but you don’t have to try so hard to hide yours from me.”

“You have enough to deal with with me just being here, I’m not going to add more to your plate.” Y/N grumbled, turning her face away.

“What are you talking about?”

“I know you wish that mother and father had sent me to Mycroft when they got too old to deal with me. I know I bother you, and I know you hate it when I can’t keep up with your mind. I’m sorry.”

Sherlock didn’t know what to say to this. He didn’t know how to deal with emotions, with his little sister’s feelings of inferiority. But as much as he wanted to leave her room and not come back until she felt better, he knew it was somehow his job to help her.

“Don’t apologize to me. I know I’m not a very good big brother.”

Y/N looked up. “Don’t be silly, you’re great. I just-“

“No.” Sherlock interrupted. “If you’re convinced that somehow you have to be me, or that you aren’t good enough just because you’re not like Mycroft or I, then clearly I’ve done something wrong. I don’t want you to be like me, ever.”

Y/N stared at Sherlock “you don’t?”

“Of course not. There’s already two of us in the family, and you’ve seen how we are at getting through life.”

“What are you talking about? You’re both doing great. I’m the idiot.”

Sherlock winced. “Perhaps you’re not as perceptive as Mycroft and I, but you’re worlds ahead of us when it comes to how to really live in this world, and enjoy life.” He pushed her math book away from her, and sat on the bed next to her.

“Really?” Sherlock had to strain to hear her croaked question.

He smiled “of course. I’ve never met anyone as vibrant as you.” He hesitantly placed his arm on her shoulder. “You don’t have to be me. Or Mycroft. You’ll do just fine in this world as you.”

Y/N smiled “thanks Shock.”

“Now, let’s take a look at that maths book.”

…

Y/N closed her maths book, a sleepy smile splayed across her face. “Thank you. I never would’ve figured that out.”

“My pleasure.”

Y/N groaned and laid across Sherlock’s lap, startling him. The comforting speech had put him out of his comfort zone enough for one night, or so he thought.

“Shock, I’m bored.”

Sherlock rolled his eyes “I believe it’s time for bed.”

She huffed “I’m not tired.”

Then she made a horrible mistake. She reached up and began to poke Sherlock’s side.

“You really should stop that.” Sherlock warned.

“Aw, c’mon Shock, don’t be a spoil sport. She poked him again, and he had to fight hard to keep a straight face. He really wasn’t very ticklish, but if she hit the right spot…

Y/N squeezed his side, and a tiny laugh escaped him. A huge grin split Y/N’s face before Sherlock reached down and pinned her hands together.

“Whahat are you doing?” She laughed nervously.

“Teaching you a little lesson about listening to your big brother.” Sherlock smirked and began to use his free hand to poke at Y/N’s stomach.

“AHAHA, Sherlock no!” Y/N squealed.

“I thought you were bored! I’m helping you!” Sherlock insisted, fighting a laugh himself as he watched his sister struggle to free herself, giggling constantly.

After a minute, Sherlock switched his tactic, scratching at Y/N’s neck, then under her arms, then back to her stomach, before he began to pinch at her ribs.

The sound that escaped her barely sounded human.

“Oh-ho! I believe we found the best spot!” Sherlock laughed, continuing to scratch at her ribs.

“SHOHOCK NOO!” She squealed, struggling like mad to free her hands.

“What on earth is…” John peaked his head in the room and froze, staring at the strange sight in front of him.

Sherlock laughed “John help me, trust me it’s great fun.”

After the shock had warn off, John just shook his head and chuckled. “No thanks Sherlock, I think I’ll just leave you both to it,” he backed out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

Sherlock continued to dig at Y/N’s ribs until her face turned bright red and her laughter turned silent as she gasped for air, then finally he let up.

“You’re so mean, Shock,” Y/N giggled as she shoved him off her bed.

“But it worked, didn’t it?” He smirked.

“What do you mean?”

Sherlock reached down and pulled the covers up to Y/N’s chin. “You’re tired now, right?”

She tried glared at him, but couldn’t keep the smile off her face.

Sherlock leaned down and kissed her forehead. “Sleep well, little sister.”

She smiled sleepily at him as he turned to leave. “Shock?”

He looked back “yeah?”

“Thank you.”

[kruinka]

VERY LONG! blue lock romfan hcs

i am not a writer and idk how to format but hear me out

isagi as transmigrated mc but before he transmigrates he was playing this otome game and was shitting on all the leads

“theyre all assholes why would the mc ever like them ew”

but he had to play it bc he promised his friend he would and isagi is a nice man and then next day he takes a soccer ball to the face and falls on a rock or smth and dies

-now hes in said game world as a side villain -bc yukimiya is the original mc -and side villain shows up for one scene shits on yuki and is never to be seen again

original mc yukimiya is def the horribly ill only child of a really doting marquis father who lost his wife (slept for three years and this tragic story is known everywhere)  -wakes up the day isagi transmigrates

boom

plot

rin & sae are imperial princes of the empire

BUT

sae self exiled and demoted himself to the far north so sae is ALSO the northern duke trope -which leaves rin in the palace having all the heir duties pushed onto him -but he doesnt want to be the next ruler bc he wants it to be sae -it was always meant to be sae until he uP AND LEFT HIM LMFAOOO

sae left bc he knew his supporters were plotting to kill rin to secure saes seat on the throne bc rins influence on the ppl as a prince was growing

so he gave up his right to the throne and left so rin would be safe in the palace

rin is the tyrant prince thats mean to everyone but also very hot and then you find out he has hellaaaa issues -including but not limited to: inferiority complex, abandonment issues, anger issues, emotionally constipated, 50 shades of anger and depression -the rin and sae routes are most definitely the most dangerous ones bc how do people not die when brothers fight

💪💪💪can u tell my brain opens big when it comes to romfan

kaiser is the young and newly crowned emperor from an empire across the seas or smth -ok bastard child born from a one night stand between emperor and a commoner maid -commoner maid became a consort but empress no likey -so empress and her children constantly go after his life -but after emperor dies kaiser kills them back?? and takes the throne himself and to protect his birth mother

ness as master of the magic tower -neutral faction -but ness himself comes from wherever kaiser is from and was his childhood playmate -ness is a funky guy that is smiley but has the power to destroy a village with a snap of a finger -fire magic user probably

nagi is one of the newcomers to the magic tower -a genius bc in these tropes not everyone can use magic -and even less are actually good at magic -wind magic bc its literally his NAME

nagi was commoner but one day found out he could use magic -bc he wanted to save his cactus or smth -and then elder of magic tower was like weewoo come with me i pay u lots and u just sit there and hes like okie

GASP

NAGI USED TO WORK FOR REO AT THE COUNTY AND THEY WERE CLOSE AND REO WAS DEVASTATED TO SEE HIM GO TO THE MAGIC TOWER OMFG

reo is heir to the richest county in the empire -nagi used to be his gardener or smth idk -so when nagi left him he went through his breakup arc -in original story he would fall for mc yukimiya who helps him out of his slump -but due to isagi shenanigans he somehow made up with nagi -and tries to buy him back from the magic tower????

bachira is human raised by fae -funky boi who hasnt lived amongst humans -also in magic tower -brings nagi to escape at night to go play and ness wants him dead sometimes

isagi is obv replacable with urself bc i want to make it so mc yuki falls for isagi too bc isagi harem yuhh

chigiri is illegitimate son of a marquis -the cheating wife dressed him as a girl and raised him like a girl so the marquis wont kill chigiri -bc if the illegitimate son was a boy he would have a right to be the heir and marquis no likey -if girl then he just wont give a shit abt the girl -later the wife has a son with the marquis which means chigiri is fucked -bc marquis wants HIS son to be heir but his son is younger than chigiri -should chigiri ever reveal himself to have a pp he would have to be sent off to the afterlife -after he becomes a legal adult he kills his dad or smth and becomes marquis himself or he just runs away -and hes hella traumatized

barou king of mercenaries must i say more

shidou head of some knight's division idk -but he swore loyalty to sae specifically -hes still guarding the palace tho

itoshi "why dont you listen to me" rin and shidou "i only take orders from itoshi sae" ryusei

kunigami is a war hero turned sword of the empire -traumatized by war -hella

kurona is palace attendant that has a bit of a crush on mc yuki -on the bad end of his route he dies trying to help mc yuki escape -but after isagi stuff theyre all besties and alive i guess

or more wink wonk

hiori is a smiley boi who became count at a young age bc he is very responsible and nice -but he actually owns the biggest information guild in the empire and has a whole assassin squad under him -do not mess with him he is gamer

karasu is the emperors assistant and he just wants to retire -everyday not only does he have to deal with the emperor -he has to deal with rin throwing fits -and making sure sae isnt actually starting a coup in the north

nanase is the mandatory best friend of transmigrated mc

noel noa as the legendary hero but is also a transmigrator that came before isagi

chris prince is the wacko shaman that lives in the forest that gives out this info abt noel noa i think thats it?? all the important ones at least

[ask--eggman]

Doctor, you remember how one of the other employees asked if you knew someone named Giovanni, correct? Well, Giovanni is the leader of a crime syndicate named Team Rocket, which is in another universe. A universe where there are animals that look human, plants that look and have animal-like body parts, and animals with plant parts exist, with magical powers. Oh, and there are mostly normal animals there too.

Hmm, interesting. Those animals still don't sound any more impressive than my genius creations that are superior to all nature on this world too! Still, perhaps there could be some potential value in them serving as energy or tools for my creations just as the inferior ones here do too. I'll have to look into it. Perhaps in the process I'll learn some more about this "Giovanni" character you speak of.

[sugutoad]

matchup trade for @hannibalhhusband !

HOUSE OF THE DRAGON MATCHUP

SFW HEAD CANONS —

My choice of Daemon Targaryan should be absolutely no surprise to you. We have done lots and lots of matchups concerning the world of House of the Dragon and even after all this time, my heart is still firm on the Rogue Prince as your lover. The two of you are Westeros’s power couple and the fates halves of Otto Hightower’s worst nightmare.

Whenever the mistaken form of any common phrase or slang words escapes your lips, Daemon would make a quick mental check at the back of his head to tease you to your ends about this slight mistake in private. While with other people, the Rogue Prince wouldn’t mind making them look inferior in front of others, he refuses to put you at a lower level then you are currently at (his forever equal) and would cut anyone who dares to venture to say anything towards his love that might hurt you soul or body. 

Normally, Daemon is the one who allows his anger to escape (this man wears his anger on his sleeve, but his love and joy for others deep in his heart) and you, being the far calmer one, can get him to relax and prevent him from doing anything that could harm him or anyone else in mere seconds. It usually just requires you to look dissatisfied with his tactics or a simple ‘no’ (if the situation has already escalated, a soft whisper, for only him to hear, that tells him to calm down alongside other advice may be needed.) It still baffles the Royal Court how you always manage to get Daemon Targaryen, the Rogue Prince and the constant doer of Sins, to not lash out on others when he has done so frequently before. But sometimes when your emotions and anger are far too bottled up and released because not even the best of people can truly remain composed at all times, even your beloved Prince can not calm you down. 

One of his main love languages is physical touch. Wherever he would walk down the halls and come across you, he would acknowledge you with a nod in front of everyone and walk towards his original destination, but first he would make sure to brush his arm across you in a way that no one else seems to notice (or at least in his delusionals because it seemed the whole court secretly knew of this scandalous affair). Oh, how he yearns for your touch. Whenever you are at back Dorne, he doesn’t want to do anything else, but to fly to you on Caraxes and let himself fall into your hugs. Fuck the crown, all he wants would be if you allow him to simply hold on to you as you run your fingers through his hair, whispering his name like a prayer.

He would love to take you riding on Dragon back. It is such a cute sight for him when you first saw a dragon, that is before you claimed your own. Hazel eyes were wide open and a small laugh betrayed you. A part of you was scared though and held tightly on Daemon’s sleeve for a split second until you realised your actions and let go of him immediately, a soft pink sprinkled on your cheek. The Targaryen prince simply smirked at his Martell ‘friend’ and took you to Caraxes. During the entirety of the flight, you sat behind Daemon, hands clutching tightly around his waist and your nose buried in his back when Caraxes began flapping his wings. Never had Daemon found you so adorable before until now and this smug idiot began commanding his Blood Wyrm to go faster. 

He spoils you almost all the time. It is not his fault that almost everything he comes across reminds him of you in one way or another. He would buy you those strange books you seem to love (why you would care so much for history is still confusing to him) If you ever mention a type of flower you like, the next day he would buy a garden of those specific flowers. He would commission gothic and ouji clothes that bear both the Martell sigil and the three headed red dragon of his own to be made by the best tailors. 

I was listing to the song ‘Genius’ by Sia and it just reminded of you and Daemon

NFSW HEADCANONS —

This man is rough (Unless his beloved pleads and begs him to slow down, then he might reconsider his current speed.) Daemon is a person who pents up his anger within his heart as we had discussed earlier. Usually it requires not much to evaporate the growing anger in his heart, but sometimes he would put that anger towards you during sex. He will leave crimson patterns all over your skin and tug on your hair, his slender fingers tangling in a mess of black locks.

He is obsessed with the idea of getting caught — it is so thrilling! Sex is supposed to be fun and with the idea of getting caught hanging over the edge, makes it far more exciting. Sometimes it would be in semi private places such as in an unlocked closed room during a party or a closet. But sometimes it is outright crazy such as fucking agaisnt a bookshelf in the library or bending you over on the Small Council meeting after everyone leaves, whispering his complaints about his brother in your ears. 

He loves getting you riled up. Stroking his finger against the skin of your thigh, biting your ear when no one is looking, kissing you roughly and randomly pulling away and walking away as if nothing happened. You name it. He wants, no scratch, he needs to watch you beg for him, tugging on his hair as he sits down while holding on to your waist. 

He is not a big fan of eye contact. During sex, he is incredibly vulnerable and despite how close you are to him and how near he holds you in his heart, he still refuses to show it. He can wear a mask of different emotions easily, even during his time of pleasure, but his eyes are a window to his soul. This is one of the many reasons his favourite sex position is doggy style (and the fact your ass looks cute from the back in his opinion)

He isn’t the King of Aftercare, sadly. Sex with him is great, but he isn’t the best at comforting and helping you better. At most, he just holds you close to his chest, his nose buried in your hair as he draws constellation patterns on your naked skin. To be honest, he would prefer to be held instead as you run your fingers through his hair and whisper how good he was. 

MARRIED LIFE  —

The two of you would definitely live in Dragonstone. It is his only home where he feels like he is in control because he knows in King’s Landing, his brother will try to somehow send him away to anywhere or everyone will always remind him how his throne was stolen from him and given to his niece. He is definitely the type of person to wake up early, so he would just hold you and watch you sleep. You always look so stressed out because of something, but when you are asleep, you look so peaceful - a look he rarely sees on your face. Three years of your time together was robbed because of the war that he had to attend. He later returns with a crown, calling himself King of the Narrow Sea. He would definitely take you on Caraxes back all the time. He knows you have your own dragon, but he loves how you hold on to him from the back. He isn’t the most domestic, but he is absolutely proud of his husband. He waited so many years for the death of his Northern Bitch (his first wife) just so he could marry you. 

DATES  —

The Rogue Prince is a busy individual, but for his love, he is willing to drop all his work to spend time with you. Dates only existed before Ian’s birth, after that there were too many kids to look after. He doesn’t mind what you want to do as long as you are the one who is the happier one of the duo. He will buy all your favourite things to see you laugh and take you to see plays and enjoy festives. Daemon would sometimes ask his servant and cooks to prepare him a picnic. The two of you would go a place with beautiful scenery in dragon back, eat the best food and later enjoy the stars (though he is busy looking at you instead of the stars)

CHILDREN  — THE UNOFFICIAL TEAM RED MEMBERS (plus you and Daemon) 

JAXTON TARGARYAN is the eldest son and first child of Jaecrrell Martell and Daemon Targaryen — a year older than Aegon Targaryen. He was born during the marriage of Daemon Targaryen and Allara Stark when Daemon was hiding an affair. So he really should be called Jaxton Waters since he is, by law, a bastard, but no one ever dares to say that in front of him unless they wish to be blown apart by his dragon, Vermithor, or one of the many guns he makes in his free time. He absolutely loathes wearing any fancy clothes, rather preferring leather jackets that are far more comfortable according to him. He is pretty and he knows it! (Though his heart is only reserved for one which I will get on in the relationship area). Like most of his brothers, he is closer to Daemon then he is with Jaecrrel and is like Daemon in many ways — for starters he is a wanted criminal because he simply doesn’t care if he puts a bullet through one’s head. He is the life of the party and often goes out drinking with his friends. He is a good dancer and singer, though he would rather die than get caught. He likes most people except one, who he loathes with all his heart for absolutely no reason (if you have a reason, you can absolutely add!) — his ‘beloved’ half-sister Aenneth Targaryen who is the result of Daemon’s first marriage with a Stark and Aegon’s Queen. He later passed this hatred and told his younger siblings (especially Lucian, Nikolai and Veritas) horrible things about Aenneth and they also grew a similar hate towards her. 

ARGENTI TARGERYAN is the second child of Jaecrrel and Daemon. He isn’t part of the Kingsguard, but he is still a knight ( a really good one at that!) He is elegant and loyal to almost everyone he loves. He is absolutely gorgeous to go along with his beautiful personality and is always wearing his armour (his armour is made out of Valyrian steel and lined with beautiful jewels). He takes lots of time doing his skin and hair to look this pretty though. While he loves all his siblings and messes with them for fun, he is the closest with his older brother, Jaxton, who is 2 years older than him (A year older then Helaena). Argenti was always seen clinging onto his older brother as a child. He has a really pretty voice and is always complimenting others. This is a big bonus for him because he is a poet and his words literally have people swooning! He is a curious soul who is always asking questions to know more and more things. He is also extremely friendly and one of the sanest brothers in his siblings and has a healthy relationship with almost everyone. While he enjoys sword fighting, he also loves roses, romance, chocolate covered strawberries (Aenneth and him are bonding over this Fr), writings, instruments and dancing! Similar to his older brother, he tries to learn many languages and is a quick learner. His dragon is a black one that people rumour is the only egg that comes somehow from Cannibal.

NEUVILLETTE TARGARYAN is the 3rd child of our couple here! He isn’t really a human, but rather a dragon god who is in the form of a human. He has been living for a long time, but every time he dies, he gets reincarnated into a new life (such a creative idea by the way). No one seems to mind that fact in his family, but rather tell him that he will be treated like all his siblings no matter what. While he appears aloof, he is actually so polite and sweet towards others — a true chivalrous gentleman. Sadly, not many people know that because of his difficulty in showing human emotions and his desire to stay indoors more than going out. Despite not being the oldest, he is a father - figure to all of his siblings, even his older ones who always turn to him when they don’t know what to do. Neuvillette is a reliable and honest person, so he always gives his true opinion to them. He is really respectful of everyone around him. His family is an absolute priority. They matter the world to him. Like I previously stated, he is so sweet and honest and wants to know everything about his friends and other humans. Literally a walking green flag! He is extremely patient with anyone and it’s really hard to get him to hate you. He upholds Jaecrrel’s court at times and brings Justice to the world in the name of the King, his father. He managed to claim Grey Ghost and enjoys riding his dragon more than anything. While he doesn’t enjoy training, he isn’t that bad at self-defence. He just prefers watching other people train while he sits at home and has little tea parties or is in the library doing god knows what (usually studying, cooking or reading ) . He refuses to commit in a relationship because he is immortal and he does not want a heavy burden in his heart when he lives a new life. He is the same age as Helaena. 

IAN TARGARYAN is the 4th sibling, a year younger than Neuvillette. Out of all his siblings, he is by far the gentlest soul. He is often called lazy because of his constant tiredness. Like most of his siblings, he is extremely intelligent. He is the person who always looks out for everyone, almost like a peacemaker. The whole Dance frustrates him because everyone overlooks him and coddles him too much when he wants to help achieve peace in a political way. He is good with younger kids and has always imagined having a family of his own. He is a Commander for Jaecrrel’s army and later leads them into multiple victories before dying during the Battle of God’s Eye while he was helping Daemon kill Aemond. His dragon is the mate of his eldest brother’s dragon — a she-dragon known as Silverwing who also died with him. A part of him is scared of war and combat, but he refuses to show it so everyone assumes everything is ok. While his siblings are trouble makers, Ian barely gets into any trouble by his parents and other adults, but is usually the one who helps his siblings out of it and scolds them later. He is sensitive to loud sounds and often gets annoyed. He loves animals and insects, going as far as to having a pet bird that would sometimes settle on his head. He even got a pet Lion on his birthday, a gift from his father (Jaecrrel). A big animal lover! He usually doesn’t stay inside and prefers the outdoors. 

LUCIAN TARGARYAN is the 5th child of Jaecrrel and Daemon (Probably the same age as Jace) He is one of the few siblings who lean towards the calmer and more timid side. He was far more outgoing as a child, but as he grew older, he drastically changed. He is logical and rational whenever it is needed at the Council table. He has a park in him that constantly desires for any sort of control of power. He learns and manipulates this control by learning how to sword fight so he can manipulate battles in his favour alongside his dragon who isn’t big in size, but incredibly quick. He was able to get the sword that once belonged to the Bloodstone Emperor in the time of the Empire of the Dawn. He absolutely loathes Team Green with all his heart and helped his father with the murder of his half-sister first son. Though for him, I believe he doesn’t want Rhaenyra OR Aegon on the throne. He believes the throne should have passed to Daemon and his children. He can easily heal himself. Like Jaxton, he is a criminal in the eyes of many kingdoms… oops? He is a very observant type of person. His solution to most problems is pulling out his sword to kill or fight or to just scare the person off. Major psycho vibes from him… He doesn’t shy away from arguments or problems, but faces them head on with a smile. He managed to claim Cannibal as his own. He enjoys lonely walks and tea/coffee. He is easily Daemon’s favourite child (Daemon never said it out loud, but it’s pretty obvious)

NIKOLAI TARGERYAN is the 6th child and the older twin, a year after Lucian’s birth! If you believed that Lucian was psychopathic, Nikolai is far worse. He is stubborn and narcissistic, his heart pouting with acidic hatred. People go as far as calling him ‘The Coming of Maegor’. He acts only on impulse, enger thinking properly before doing anything major. No one likes being with him much because of how quickly he commences violently which causes people to panic. Somehow he is still alive after all his thrill-seeking risks. He was a sweet guy at one point tho! Similar to Aemond, he didn’t have a dragon or even the normal Targaryen looks so his cousins would bully him, especially Aegon (If Nikolai went up to Aenneth and told her everything, she would have stopped because she may not like Daemon, but those are her siblings no matter what. Alas, Nikolai was too scared of her because of the horrible stories Jaxton made up about her). He, like most of his brothers, looked up to Jaxton and Nikolai even had a similar gun like his. He takes his anger out on other people a lot. He loves making jokes all the time, whether they are sexual, dark, sarcastic or even make people uncomfortable. He is one of Team Green’s biggest threats and they believe it was him who caused the death of Jaehaerys. Aegon sent Aemond to go and burn down Nikolai, hopefully killing him in the process. But Nikolai was Aemond’s closest form as a child so he made sure to not kill him, but to only injure him.  He now has horrible burns on his body. He is a master at card and boards games, anything that involves using your mind in a strategic manner. He reads sometimes, but only erotic novels.

CAINE TARGARYAN is Nikolai’s younger twin and the 7th sibling. He is one of the few siblings who lean on the sane side. He is calm and manipulative, only when he needs to though. He is aware of his strengths and weaknesses. He is a quiet soul, but not necessarily shy. If he needs to face a situation, he can easily do so with a calm facade. He is extremely apathetic, the death of his close ones not affecting him at all. While Nikolai murders for him, Caine is only willing to get his hands dirty if it results in his benefit or one of his family. He is able to see through anyone’s demeanour and recognize their true emotions and potential. This is why he refuses to participate in the war on either side because he already had a hypothetical guess for its ending. He is able to share the most disturbing news with either a straight face or a sweet smile. [Guess who just died! :) !] He is always hiding in plain sight and scheming with his own plans, acting alone instead of with Team Black. Unknown to most, he is actually very mischievous and plays pranks on many people all the time, they just never know it’s him because of how quickly he disappears from their sight. He is always away from the crowd and hiding somewhere. It is a habit he developed as a kid. Whenever there was a storm, he would hide under his bed because he felt safe there. He doesn’t fight much of offence,  but he is really good at self-defence.

VERITAS TARGARYAN is the youngest child of Jaecrrel Martell and Daemon Targeyan. He fits in the mature and calm category alongside some of his other brothers. He is one of the siblings who keeps them all out of trouble, but he later scolds them for their stupid behaviour. While almost all his siblings are intelligent, none of them really use fancy big words aside from Veritas who tries to model himself after Jaecrrel. While his other brothers prefer the company of Daemon, Veritas prefers his other father. He always tries to learn new things and was often found sleeping in the library and surrounded by a pile of books as a kid. Because of his intelligence, he looks down on people who are ‘fools and idiots’ — their mere company is dreadful to him. He knows a lot about medical issues, crime, law, history etc. and is a master at puzzle and problem solving. When people first lay their eyes upon Veritas, he has this mysterious vibe around him ( it is calming and creepy). He is extremely sarcastic and sassy and a winner of almost every argument he has. He has either a resting bitch face or an annoyed facade. He refuses to sword fight because he doesn’t like getting dirty, he is a gentleman afterall. He doesn't like his family asides his fathers. His brother’s mock him for everything he does, Aemond is too cocky, Aegon is a drunken fool, Heleana is weird, Aenneth is not his ‘true’ family, Viserys is too weak to rule and where is Daeron even? 

AGES DURING THE DANCE: TEAM RED

Jaxton (22)

Argenti (20)

Neuvillette (19)

Ian (18)

Lucian (16)

Nikolai (15)

Caine (15)

Veritas (14)

Jaecrrel (41)

Daemon (48)

PARENTING —

Daemon: Daemon is not the best dad, but he does try. He has a tendency of favouring specific kids because of small little things, but it is a habit he tries to get over. His family is his top priority. He would train the boys to train and defend themselves. A part of him wants to hold a little girl of his own in his arms, but as we know, they never happened. Mayhaps in another life where the dance doesn't happen. He would go absolutely ballistic if he sees one of his kids hurt and would be willing to burn down a whole House or village out of anger. He takes the kids out with him a lot, especially on his dragons when they were kids since most of the kids ( aside Argernti, Caine and Veritas) the rest of them were n't born with dragons and didn’t claim them until later in life. Even the kids that were born with dragons couldn’t fully ride it until the magnificent beasts are older. 

Jaecrrel: I feel like you would be a really good dad! You are the dad - friend after all. You assure your kid’s safety above everything, fussing over the smallest of things. Since Daemon is pretty chill with the kids, it is your job to discipline them. They learn most of their studies, languages and hobbies from you actually! You are fully aware that most of the boys prefer Daemon, but that doesn’t diminish your love for them. 

VACATIONS — 

Vacations are so chaotic! With so many trouble makers on board, something almost always goes wrong. Worst case scenario: someone dies. Best case scenario: someone breaks a bone. Umm not exactly the most fitting? Vacations usually happen in Essos since most of the kids don’t like Westeros since they are continuously reminding throughout that continent that Viserys is the King and how important he is. Every time the family goes out, they almost get bankrupt because of how many things everyone keeps on buying! 

RELATIONSHIPS  —

Jaxton is best friend’s with Aegon. The two of them go out drinking a lot and are similar in age. Their friendship slowly started drifting apart once Jaxton learned that Aegon was a bully to Nikolai and with his disgusting half-sister. His main enemy is Aenneth (no surprise!) He doesn’t consider her proper family because they weren’t fully related and she lives with those ‘disgusting’ Hightowers. His lover is Alys Rivers. 

Argenti is best friends with Jacerys. They grew up as childhood friends and are the responsible ones in their family that try to settle this stupid war. His enemy is most likely Aemond. He hates how cocky and intense he is, it frustrates him a lot. And anyone Jace doesn’t like, Argenti doesn’t like. His lovers are both Cregan Stark and Jacerys. This relationship happens in a good ending where nobody dies after the Dance, 

Neuvillette is best friends with Ian. It isn’t uncommon for a person to look toward a sibling who is close in age as their best friend. Ian was the one who always understood him the most. His enemy is Aegon. It is a one sided hate. Aegon simply hates most of the boys, but he hates how special Neuvillette is and always says that he is trying too hard to be likeable.  It is a hatred mainly rooted from jealousy. 

Ian is best friends with Neuvillette! I already explained a bit at the top, but Ian never had many people his age growing up so they always stuck by one another. His enemy is Jacerys. It isn’t really an enemy situation, but more of trying to be the better one because of how similar they are so they clash with one another. His lover is sweet Helaena. They would be the sweetest couple to exist that doesn’t deserve any sort of pain at all. 

Lucian is best friends with no one. Everyone is a waste of breath in his eyes, sadly. He is, however, enemies with almost everyone except his family. He doesn’t care for team black or green. His lover would probably be Baela. She matches his fire and fierce nature, but can easily calm him down. 

Nikolai is best friends with Aemond. They used to be best friends as kids before Aemond claimed Vhagar and became obsessed with Valyrian purity. His current best friend is Caine. His enemy is Aegon. Aegon was one of his biggest bullies as a child and one of the reasons he turned out like that. Congrats Aegon for being the main enemy of not one, but three members on Team Red. 

Caine is best friends with Nikolai. There is no bond stronger than the one between twins who share half of the same soul. His enemy is Aegon as well. He didn’t care much for this war, but when Nikolai was hurt and nearly killed under the commands of Aegon, Caine loathed that man. I feel like he isn’t in a relationship because of how detached he is. 

Veritas is best friends with Lucerys. He was absolutely devastated at the death of his childhood friend who grew up with him in Dragonstone. Plus, Lucerys was the only one, aside from his lover, who respected him besides his parents. His enemy is Viserys. He hates this war and in his opinion, it all happened because Viserys was a weak ruler. His lover is Rhaena. They would be another cute couple that doesn't deserve any of their pain. He sort of married her out of pity and respect since she lost Luce, her fiancé. Don’t worry, feelings were later developed. 

Jaecrrel is best friends with Rhaenyra. They were friends and when Rhaenyra’s throne was taken, Jaecrrel came to help her. Her eldest son’s name is also inspired by him. His enemy is Alicent. Jaecrrel never was that close to her in their childhood and once he learned that she tried to usurp Rhaenyra? Game over. His lover is Daemon. I don’t think I need to explain this! 

NETTLES —

Most of the boys hate Nettles so much. Daemon comes with a new girl shortly after your death and they are supposed to just accept it (a girl who is the same age as Veritas too)? Most of them try to keep their distance away from her and only Caine, Veritas, Argenti and Neuvillette show some respect to her and are friendly with her. It isn’t fully her fault that Daemon chose her, right? Team Red is extremely family oriented. Anyone who isn’t family is an enemy (even their half-sister. Their requirements are that they must be all fully related). So when Nettles and, she disrupted that chain and they think that Jaecrrel is being replaced by someone of such… modest beginnings as Gwayne once said. Most of the siblings (aside the 4 earlier mentioned) are lowkey planning her murder. Nikolai and Ian couldn’t give a single fuck about her. It is actually Jaxton and Lucian who hate her so much. 

[mitigatedchaos]

[ @lokifreign ]

is it helpful to imagine that the Dem party s earnest about its philosophy & goals? how does that assumption fit with their policies and choices since Carter?

I never ended up reviewing much stuff 1980s-1990s, and mostly touched on 1970s as part of branching of my investigation into the effectiveness of charter schools - namely that 1970 is around the time we started to work on the matter seriously, so we've been trying at it for about 50 years.

But...

What I know, and what all of the Rationalists know, is that evolution is a property of all information systems that conform to certain rules.

There is no fundamental requirement that every possible way you slice humanity, it all has to be equal. There's only a statistical chance that they'll be close enough that it doesn't really matter on average. Which would be nice, in some sense, but it's a hope. It's not a law.

This is why most Rationalists are also Transhumanists; they want to raise humanity's material standard of living, but also they're liberals, so they don't want to hurt people to do so. If some people have bad spines, then we'll just make cool robot spines for them at a factory. There's no point waxing hysterical about how having a bad spine is oppression by society (it isn't), or flipping out and killing everyone that has a bad spine for being "inferior" (rather defeats the point).

Understanding evolution as a property of information systems, which does not require that everyone has a good spine, is available to anyone with about +1.5 SD without stating it, if education includes most of the basic background assumptions, if you catch my drift.

And the individualist meritocratic system hedges for this. It just measures the performance of each individual person's spine. It doesn't make assumptions about the underlying distribution of spines. And if you find great vitamins that fix people's spines, then it just accepts this benefit and moves on. Throw in some welfare to search for or distribute spine vitamins and you're mostly set.

Okay, now to get to the point.

Because this information is available to them, the progressive left/post-lib ≥ +1.5 SDs either knowingly, willingly, and deliberately chose to defect and selfishly promote graft; decided to be cowards when their capabilities should have them as officers; or their opinions are so socially determined that they can't be said to have their own opinions, and should be subordinated.

The ≤ +0s buying into the ideology after years of saying to be nice to everyone is disturbing, but they don't have the same responsibility.

Using individualist meritocracy for this purpose, while soft-suppressing the Nazis through social pressure, plus money for development, is a powerful technique to manage the problem at the current level of technology. We manage to promote individual behavioral justice until the problem can be solved, set the system up to function correctly if the problem solves itself, while quietly attempting to solve the problem, without making information accessible that more cognitively vulnerable populations might attempt to weaponize to undermine the project - the dangerous stuff is only to be discussed in obscure scientific journals you need +1 SD to even read.

This combination is genius. For a liberal, it's tough to do much better than this at current levels of technology, including social technology.

And the progressive left/post-lib +1.5s broke that within 10 years, in order to gain... no improvements on any worthwhile metric.

This gets into why I'm so furious with them. Now they might even break the medical establishment, science, and even all of the power plants outside of East Asia, pushing back the possibility of building a factory for cool robot spines by decades or maybe even centuries.

[faggotryandtransjesterism]

VegasPete Fic Rec Masterlist (Pt. 1)

favorites are marked with a (*)

Lost Pet by @clandestinegardenias | 12k | E

Vegas has very few things he truly allows himself to care for, in this life. Going through the routine of feeding his hedgehog, only to find that a second pet has left him in as many weeks, might finally be the thing that pulls him under.

i can't really point to why i like this one so much, but it was my first vp fic and i always come back to it.

spend the rest of your life (what could have been) by toomoon | 15k | M

“I have an idea,” Pete says slowly, and Pol looks up at him. “But you’re not going to like it.” “I’ll take anything at this point,” Pol tells him. “Tell me.” Pete tells him. Pol doesn’t like it.

Pete and Pol get put in charge of a surveillance operation on a potential business rival. The only way to avoid rousing suspicion is to take over a small family restaurant. Vegas is the only person in the Theerapanyakul mansion that can cook. It's all going smoothly until the restaurant actually becomes a success.

vegaspete running a restaurant, what can i say? i love the vibes and the premise of this fic so much. also features trans!Pete, which was a nice surprise.

Sustenance by @givemeunicorns | 14k | M *

His grandmother told him when he was very young that there was no love in the world so filling as a place at the table. That there was no greater kindness, no greater expression of devotion, than to feed another, no better way to make them whole.

As the smoke begins to clear, Pete waits and wonders.

i adore this fic with every bone in my body!! food as a love language my beloved. i remember feeling like i'd been punched in the gut when i first watched ep. 14 and pete said because I'm hungry, and this fic really taps into that reaction, and builds on it with some beautiful character study for both pete and vegas.

fuck it all back down by @syzyg3tic | 4k | E *

Everything about sex is performative. There is no such thing as fucking without an agenda, at least in Vegas’s experience. He wouldn’t have survived to adulthood if he was precious about shit like that.

Vegas and some of the men he sleeps with in his desperate, rage-filled attempts to be loved or hated--either will work.

unparalleled, genius, the Vegas fic. great character study and really influenced the way i perceive him. also sparked my obsession with big and also with vegasporsche friendship. (obligatory CW for vegas' psychosexual obsession with his cousin. Freak <3)

hoping at the gates they'll tell me that you're mine by puckbaes | 34k | E

Missing scenes between Vegas being gunned down and waking up again.

Pete takes care of an injured Vegas, what's left of the minor family's business and Macau. He's reminded that while he resigned from his job, the family that loves him are not going to abandon him.

Bamf!Pete, found families, and glimpses of life after Vegas wakes up.

nice little fluffy domestic vegaspete fic :) i don't read much fluff for this pairing for obvious reasons, but this one's cute.

Five-Star Southpaw by Anonymous | 106k | E *

When Vegas is handed the keys to a failing major family hotel and told to bring it back to life, he knows it’s not a gift, or a test, or even an opportunity to prove himself. It’s a taunt. It’s a way to set him up for failure so everyone can rub his nose in the shitshow he’s left with, defeated and inferior to his cousins like always. It’s the death sentence of his pride in a gilded cage.

But misery loves company and all that, and he finds a surprisingly fitting cellmate in an unassuming looking employee named Pete. Now if only he could get Pete to stop playing hard to get, this cage could become a lot more comfortable.

Obviously. We all know. this is The VegasPete Fic, it's glorious, it's perfect. i think about it at least once a day.

stay with me a minute (swear i'll make it worth it) by incendir | 2k | M

Pete hadn’t anticipated how much breathing would hurt.

[Or, an unseen moment in 1x13]

incendir is an author i read consistently, all of their oneshots are great, so definitely check out their page after you finish this one!

while I do my thing in the background by TheDameJudiWench | 1k | G

"I have a gift for you. This is Pete."

tankhun-centric vegaspete fic my beloved...

First Impressions to Love Expressions (Chapter 12) by @iffervescent | 6k | E *

this is part of a series of stand-alone kpts fics, but i think this is the only vp one. anyway, it's immaculate. the little delve into pete's backstory, his connection to vegas and the family throughout his life are all amazing. great writing, great characterization, highly recommend.

like a trigger (get me ready to shoot) by @veliseraptor | 6k | M *

sadism: psychosexual disorder in which sexual urges are gratified by the infliction of pain on another person. (Encyclopaedia Britannica)

As far as Vegas can tell, there are normal people who want normal things, and then there's whatever he's got going on.

another marvelous Vegas character study, beautiful characterization. lise is another author i read regularly, so you'll see a lot of them on my lists.

That's it for part 1! I'm just going through my bookmarks in reverse order, so there's no real rhyme or reason to the ordering here. If anyone knows of any more of these authors that are on tumblr, pls feel free to tag them!

[kenonade]

stella maris reading log #1

its about damn time i start noting down how i feel when i read what i read. hell yeah. hopefully this makes me a better writer.

spoilers not really about the plot (bc honestly is there even a plot in the sense of a plot) but more about the language below the cut woooooo

tldr: book cool. writing insane. wtf. wtf. wtf. head ouchie. 越级打怪的后果就是头晕脑转 (dizziness is the consequence of attempting to read beyond my level). ooga booga man talk abt english

reading stella maris is so interesting because im just sitting here wondering like. how the FUCK did mccarthy accumulate all this knowledge about a variety of very distinct fields. my brain hurts. this is so much information. im learning nothing and learning everything at the same time. how the man managed to learn all this stuff and how he managed to put it together like this puzzle me equally intensely. its one thing to acquire knowledge. its a whole other thing to convey it in language so dense with information but also character. like, not to be that guy, but when osc does his infodumps i think to myself okay old man lets get you to bed. every time alicia opens her mouth i confront my intellectual inferiority and contemplate the meaning of life because it is alicia talking.

not to mention what the FUCK alicia. if only you’d have KNOWN. EUGH. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT.

my head hurts. the reason why im writing instead of reading is because ive already reached my reading breaking point where my eyes glaze over and the words go in one and out the other. its only been two hours. difficult language i can handle fine, verbosity is fine, i inhaled the ender stuff and only took breaks when osc pissed me off, but stella maris is information overload in a way that i’ve never experienced before. im like, texting three separate people all the time. oh i should vet this w my math guy. i need to show this to my psych classmate. this has to go to my orthopedics bestie.

i started this book saw the page number and went oh sure. its half the length of the passenger. the style means that it’ll contain less words overall too. i should be able to finish this on a three hour hsr ride. WRONG. i CANT. it’s TOO DIFFICULT. im running into roadblocks very similar to what i felt when i read the passenger: dont know place/name/context/big word. except im finding stella maris to be even more difficult because unlike some nautical jargon or random place in the midwestern usa that i can just look up, i cant. i think its impossible to even begin to comprehend all this math.

that’s definitely part of the charm of stella maris. the format of audio transcripts creates a much more intimate connection between the characters and the reader. the target demographic of this novel, though niche, is definitely not as niche as to comprise only of genius mathematicians with a burning passion for music and a hatred of psychology. the reader might be a master in one of these fields, but alicia outsmarts them in it along with all others. viewed through this lens, the reader is the doctor. the reader is the one who converses with alicia, trying their best to piece together a mind that is so extraordinarily genius and extraordinarily tormented. it’s a position of emotional significance. the reader sits through these audio recordings because they want to understand alicia. and to understand alicia is to love her. (this is a certified when i truly understand my enemy i love him moment)

all of that sits in stark contrast to western’s narration in the passenger.

i wrote an entire paragraph but tumblr fucking ate it. im pissed. its ok. for love i’ll write it again.

western’s narration is detached. it’s impersonal. mccarthy’s clinical and direct use of language alienates the viewer and prevents the formation of any sincere rapport, allowing only mild sympathy for western’s continued suffering. the reader is merely an observer, piecing together the life of a strange, curious creature through inference and deduction. nor is the reader meant to empathize with him. he’s the one who chose to abandon alicia, the one reckless enough to chose race car driving over his degree, and therefore the one who shoulders alone the responsibility of alicia’s death—or so he thinks. in a sense, because western is comparatively lucid, the detached narration becomes almost a punishment for the guilt he’s assigned to himself. he’s not the one in the mental asylum, afterall.

its interesting to me how mccarthy presents this duo to the audience. i have many Thoughts on alicia’s sexuality and stuff but i should finish the book before i synthesize those thoughts. anyway. thanks for reading 👍

[shinagawa-division]

Verbal Justice (CodeX Ver.)

Bring The Beat!

[CodeX:]

CodeX!

[Sumire:]

Our intelligence is lethal (Lethal)

A combination of regal and evil (Evil)

[Miho:]

Don’t expect us to show any mercy (Mercy)

Bow down, baby, bow down (Down)

[Ritsuko:]

We’re on top of the divisions

Taking them out with precision

This is your final hour

Behold our great power

[Sumire:]

C-O-D-E-X

An encryption so powerful and complex

Come at us, ya fucking pleb

Good luck getting out of this spiders web

Nothing and no one can match our pace

We’ll put you in your place

I’m Diabla, Hell’s Queen

Ain’t like nothing you’ve foreseen

[Miho:]

Pests: destroyed

Empathy: devoid

Objections: rejected

Victory: expected

This royale is filled with people who are inferior

Doesn’t take a genius to know that we’re superior

Iron Maiden here on my golden throne

I’m going to take everything that you own

[Ritsuko:]

Has it finally settled in on who you’re up against?

Still challenging us, you don’t have common sense

Save your breath

Against Strychnine, your only option is death

It’s all part of my design

Getting rid of anyone in my way, this world shall be mine

And you’re up next

Be prepared to face the best

[CodeX:]

We��ll take up our Hypnosis Microphone

Paving the way to our brand new world

This future now belongs to CodeX, to CodeX

Spinning a web you can’t stop from being unfurled

We’ll take up our Hypnosis Microphone

Paving the way to our brand new world

This future now belongs to CodeX, to CodeX

Hold fast to the ideals of our verbal justice

[Miho:]

It's a coup d'état, can’t stop us, we’re taking over

[Sumire:]

The world that we will rebuild is coming ever closer

[Ritsuko:]

Be grateful for this exposure

[Miho:]

We’ve got an iron resolve

[Sumire:]

The rest of you continue to devolve

[Ritsuko:]

The three of us will continuously evolve

[Miho:]

(SHUT UP) If you wanna complain

[Ritsuko:]

(SHUT UP) You’re forever plain

[Sumire:]

(SHUT UP) Stay in your lane

[Miho:]

We’ll always be on top

[Sumire:]

It ain’t something you can stop

[Ritsuko:]

It’s rather amusing watching you flop

[Sumire:]

It’s over, we’ve won this game

[Ritsuko:]

You only have yourself to blame

[Miho:]

Don’t ever forget the name

[CodeX:]

CodeX!

[Sumire:]

Our intelligence is lethal (Lethal)

A combination of regal and evil (Evil)

[Miho:]

Don’t expect us to show any mercy (Mercy)

Bow down, baby, bow down (Down)

[Ritsuko:]

We’re on top of the divisions

Taking them out with precision

This is your final hour

Behold our great power

(THIS IS THE POWER OF CODEX)

[CodeX:]

We’ll take up our Hypnosis Microphone

Paving the way to our brand new world

This future now belongs to CodeX, to CodeX

Spinning a web you can’t stop from being unfurled

We’ll take up our Hypnosis Microphone

Paving the way to our brand new world

This future now belongs to CodeX, to CodeX

Hold fast to the ideals of our verbal justice

[night-unfurls-its-splendour]

🌤️ 🌩️ ☔

🌤️Share your favorite piece of dialogue from your WIP.

Published or unpublished? Because have so much favorite dialogue from all of the published chapters. And not much to choose from for Ch. 8. So I guess I'll do one of each.

The first is from Chapter 5, where Erik has just played her an excerpt from his new composition and Christine is feeling quite inferior to him, as an artist. She says that she has no genius of her own. Which Erik is of course very offended by:

"You must never forget that skilled as I am, though I say it myself, I am not so powerful as to be able to imbue talent where there was none before. I am only able to foster what nature has already gifted you. Do you understand me? And please say that you do, Christine, for you must know—know—that it is not in my nature to lie about music to spare anyone's feelings; even yours."

And then I don't have much dialogue at all written for Ch. 8, but this kind of connects to the above incident:

"Father always said he wasn't really talented," she sobbed quietly. "He said he simply practiced well. When he would tell me of the Angel of Music, I asked if he'd ever heard the Angel, and he shook his head and told me that he'd never been so blessed."

And Erik connects this with the fact that Christine did the exact same thing earlier in the evening.

🌩️ Share something funny/cracky from your WIP.

OK its not terribly funny, per se. I've been forced to confront today that I just don't do a lot of comedy in my writing. Except perhaps for the passage in chapter 5 where Erik mentally calls Carlotta a "contemptible cow" and then considers making her "moo" instead the next time.

But this is a scrap I have written for a future chapter:

Only Meg Giry had made any effort in those first few months to befriend her, and that had been an exercise in understanding when Christine required her solitude. That must have been quite an effort for little Meg, curious and nosy as she was. More than once he'd had to hold closed some hatch or panel which Meg had sniffed out to prevent her from confirming her discovery. She was a chronic pebble in his shoe.

☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it?

Ah okay this is actually excellent. Yes.

So I've been reading Driven by the wonderful and lovely TryingNotToLoveYou, where each chapter is named after and accompanied by lyrics from a different Depeche Mode song. Now I LOVE Depeche Mode. Every fic (published or WIP) that I've ever thought of for poto has a title taken from a DM song. It's just such PotO music.

One song in particular has always stood out to me: A Question of Time, in which the narrator expresses his fear and concern for a young girl and how it won't be long before "They" (this can be interpreted to mean men specifically or society in general) start to take advantage of her. He says "I've got to get to you first, before they do". The song also contains the lyrics "I'll take you under my wing; somebody should" which of course brings to mind "The Angel of Music has her under his wing".

This song was released in 1985 and my idea is for a movie based 1985 AU where a young Christine is an aspiring singer who gets signed to Erik’s record label.

I would love to write this fic. The problem is, its more of a vibe, an atmosphere, than an actual story in my head. I don't think I could write a story for any time period after 1918 to be perfectly honest.

In some ways I feel like I have a better understanding of life-patterns older periods. And the 80's would be particularly tough for me because its kind of in the middle as far as history goes. Its not far enough back to feel like fantasy-land but just far enough back that I wasn't alive yet and I don't even have a firm enough grasp of life in the 90's to fall back on (I was born in 95). So even though I'm probably the most familiar with the 80's out of any period in the mid-20th century pop-culturally, I still feel unqualified. And as for plot? Beyond this starting point, I have no idea where I would even start. I can't imagine writing any kind of long-fic, especially a modern!AU one. When the Longing Returns is actually just a short fic that has been stretched out by my excessive wordiness 😅😂

[katcadecascade]

If you believe the lies I tell (Snowjanus fic: Chapter Three)

Ao3

Tumblr Chapter Index

Chapter Three: Competition

Word Count: 1,953

By the time he’s in class, Coriolanus’ number one priority is to ignore Sejanus Plinth. An easy task since he doesn’t cause a scene. Relatively is left alone unless someone pesters him. Today seems like a good day for both of them. 

Coriolanus barely glanced in Sejanus’ direction and Sejanus only had to deal with Vispania’s belittlement. He shut her up with a reminder of her recent blunder in their debate exam. 

Everything was back to normal. 

Coriolanus is formulating a plan on what to stash away from the dining hall, anything to join the muffin intended for Tigris. He has to make backup plans after backup plans if Clemensia ever interferes. This is all he can think about during their class before lunch hour. 

Their calculus lesson had to take a pause for their professor to receive documents from the ink and printer room. Urban Canville, top student of the subject, was asked to assist. 

“And there he goes, our calculus genius,” Gaius mourns like a nurse bidding a soldier farewell. 

Apollo taps a pencil on his textbook, “I swear there is a calculator in his head, it’s the only explanation.” 

“Or you’re bad at math,” Diana teased. 

“Hey, I scored higher than you last I checked.”

“Well, twins, you’re both beneath me,” Arachne butted in, believing she was always a part of the conversation.

“Okay, can we just all agree we hate math,” Domitia said.

“Minus Urban Canville,” Festus winked. “Get it? Minus?”

Only Persephone Price laughed. 

Gaius fake-yelled, “Boo! Get off the stage!”

“I’ll be here all week, folks!”

“Besides, I don’t think anyone is gonna out calculate Urban,” Florus said, tapping a pencil on Apollo’s head. 

Diana had to interfere before the boys started sword fighting with their stationary. 

“Really? That’s quite the statement.”

No one expected such a mocking tone from Sejanus. 

Coriolanus feels his eyes burning at the rich boy. He gives the attention no mind, soaking in the way their classmates stare curiously or irritatedly.  

“I’m surprised that none of you have tried hard enough to beat Urban’s score.”

“Excuse you,” Vipsania stands up and points at the mocker, “I am one of the top ranked students here.”

“That doesn’t sound like you’re actually the top student. We all know that’s Coriolanus.”

Eyes flicker to him and Coriolanus burns at the way Sejanus said his name. He’s using his name to further make their classmates inferior. 

It’s a brag, is his delayed thought. It’s equally a praise. 

Coriolanus still refuses to visibly acknowledge Sejanus, so he turns to Clemensia, “Do you have any idea what’s going on? It sounds like a mess.”

She tuts, as if she’s a disappointed mother, “They are a mess.” 

While that further infuriates most of their classmates, besides her, Lysistrata giggles at Clemensia. The girls exchange more laughter, like they’re sharing an inside joke. Coriolanus merely raises an eyebrow at her, surprised that Clemensia’s partaking in the biting comments. 

“They can still clean up their act.” 

Sejanus commands everyone’s attention back to him. 

It’s effortlessly done. 

Coriolanus wonders where Sejanus learned to say all the right words. To manipulate the crowd. It’s the opposite of what Coriolanus does. 

Coriolanus Snow charms the audience to keep everything in order. 

Sejanus Plinth riles up the audience for chaos.

“The upcoming calculus test.” He scans his audience, yet somehow skips over Coriolanus. Air is trapped in Coriolanus’ lungs. “Anyone who replaces Urban Canville’s number one spot gets a Plinth prize of my own.” That gets people to mutter about but once again, Sejanus shuts them up. “Not money, that’ll be real boring. I’m offering up a favor.” 

“What are you on about?” Arachne scoffed, “We don’t need anything from-“

“Shush!” Festus nearly throws his body on top of her desk, shoving a single finger against Arachne’s red lips. “Let the man bake!”

Persephone corrects, “Don’t you mean cook?”

“Yes!” 

His enthusiasm is uninterrupted when Felix strong-arms him off the desk. Festus straightens up and behind him, everyone ignores Arachne dramatically gagging into a napkin that Felix passed her. 

Festus explains, “He’s right, we don’t need his money but making Sejanus Plinth do whatever we want? Now that’s a real prize!”

Persephone winces, “You’re making it sound cruder than it would be, Festus.” 

He winks at her, “Only if you think that way.” 

Besides them, Arachne and Domitia shared appalled, mocking faces. 

“Actually, I'm with him on this. It would be interesting to see Sejanus hold his end of the bargain.” Felix Ravinstill approaches Sejanus Plinth, “Anything we ask?”

“Don't make him do anything illegal,” Persephone warns, proving that she really is the nicest girl in class. “That’ll be too far.”

“We’re not that chaotic, can’t let our families find out after all,” Their class president assures her with a smile, but to Sejanus it is anything but warm. “But, Sejanus, don’t think it’ll be anything simple.”

“I would hope not,” he smiles and reaches out a hand.

The most politically rich boy shakes hands with the richest outsider of all of the Capitol. 

A deal has been struck. 

“Sejanus, why are you doing this to Urban?” Gaius asked, so far the only one willing to defend Urban. 

“I’m not doing this to Urban, this is about all of you.” False gratitude has never sounded so much like a threat before. Sejanus has them all eating out of his palm. “Prove that you really are the best and brightest of the Capitol. Also why not have some fun with academic rivalry.”

“I hate calculus, but I admit I’m intrigued,” Apollo grins even though his twin elbows him roughly. 

“This is what finally gets you to take math seriously?”

“Hey, I’d love to win something. After all, it’s gonna be Coriolanus who wins the actual Plinth Prize.”

A few heads turn to the leading candidate for the scholarship money. 

He only has mere seconds to decide what mask he has to wear. Anything to maintain the image of the perfect Snow. 

“Do you really think that Apollo?” Coriolanus performs with a million dollar smile, “Well, one more test to ace isn’t a real problem for me.”

Now that raises everyone’s ego. The chance to take something away from the untouchable Coriolanus Snow. 

He sees in the way Arachne whispers to Felix. As Florus and Apollo immediately plan a study session that Diana of course invites herself in. Coriolanus despises them a little bit more. They just had to prove his thoughts right. 

Everyone in this school feeds off of others’ failures. 

Urban Canville, the challenge, no - the obstacle, arrives and the tension in the room shifts. 

“Why’s everyone staring at me?” 

“We’re just talking about calculus, buddy,” Festus is instantly at his side, very touchy-feely, roping an arm around Urban’s neck, “and how you’re so good at it.” 

Behind Urban’s back, Festus glares at everyone to not snitch. It's mostly aimed at Gaius who does concede. Class resumes without a hitch. 

Coriolanus has to wait until everyone leaves before confronting the most annoying person in his life. Clemensia needed to be placated with a promise of not taking too long, that he’ll catch up later. 

When it’s just them, there’s no more performances. 

“What the hell was all of that?”

Sejanus squirms in his chair, finally acting like his usual, uncomfortable self. 

Seeing this just makes Coriolanus angrier. 

If this guy can behave two-faced so easily, manipulate their classmates, how is Coriolanus’ own mask believable?

He has the urge to pace around, think of better ways to lie, to analyze how exactly their classmates were suckered in by Sejanus. As suspicious as his actions were, they only focused on their own world. 

Pride on the verge of narcissism. 

It was too well played out but it was enough to pique their interest. Coriolanus would be impressed if not for his irritation over Sejanus. Specifically about how he knows Sejanus better than anyone else. 

And right now, Sejanus knows him better than anyone Coriolanus has allowed. 

He stays rooted in front of Sejanus, needing to figure out what’s exactly in his head. 

The alpha bites his lip, for once considering his words. If only he was always like this. 

“Sejanus,” the name is harsh on his tongue, “tell me, now.”

The command should make him feel powerful, from just the way the alpha gazes up at the omega. But those brown eyes full of pity sends poison down his veins. 

It almost makes Coriolanus squirm, targeted under the weight of Sejanus’ undivided attention. 

“It was the only way I could think of to-”

“To give me food?” His pride takes over, already regretting this conversation. “You’re telling me that you proposed some idiotic bet for all your enemies on the chance that I would accept your generosity?”

He expects Sejanus to lie to him. Or say something absurd like he’s doing this out of the kindness of his heart. That he’s a good alpha providing gifts to a good omega. How Sejanus’ sense of judgment and righteousness demands to treat Coriolanus like this. 

That’s a terrifying relationship. Coriolanus refuses to be an object that sits pretty for every compliment, to receive a feast for doing absolutely nothing. 

“Yes, I did.” Something just clicks behind those brown eyes and Sejanus’ expression hardens. “You said it yourself, you’re not spoiled. Coriolanus, you’re hard working and twice as stubborn than everyone else.” He stands up, preparing to leave with his bag slung over his shoulder. “You don’t have to win this competition though, that’s up to you.”

He sees it and he hates it. 

Sejanus is trying to rile him up, trap him into admitting that he has something that Coriolanus Snow needs. 

As if. 

“I don’t want handouts.”

“This isn’t a handout. This is a choice.”

He is right. Coriolanus could choose to not partake in zealous efforts of reaching the top. 

But it is not in his nature to lie down and let his competitors gain what he deserves. 

Coriolanus deflects, “So you made a spectacle? That doesn’t sound like you, Sejanus.”

“I’m just speaking your language.” At Coriolanus’ scoff, a reflex to mask his confusion, Sejanus steps closer. He lays a hand on Coriolanus’ arm. “I know you can beat everyone in this class. Do what you do best, Coriolanus Snow. Be at the top.”

An exhilarating thrill buzzes throughout Coriolanus Snow. 

He does not need Sejanus Plinth’s permission. 

It’s natural for the sun to shine brighter than the stars.

For the ocean to knock down sandcastles. 

For snow to land on top. 

The real Plinth Prize waits at graduation day.

But today?

His classmates saw a chance, no matter how small, to best him. It’s maddening to have a target on his back but at the same time, Coriolanus welcomes them to try. Eager to see them all fall. Graduation and university is too far away. After seeing their glimmer of hope, he craves their defeat now. 

This is more than a predator nature of dynamics or survival instincts born from starvation. This is what Coriolanus truly greeds for. To actually feel like the top of a mountain peak. 

Anyone else would tear at him with teeth and claws, exposing this bloody animal he locks under a perfect mask. Yet with Sejanus it’s a scalpel, a clean cut. 

In an impossible way, Coriolanus feels seen. Layers of flesh exposed and undone, revealing a hungry creature, a void that will devour. 

Beyond status or wealth, Coriolanus Snow can and will dominate any who opposes him. 

It’s a taste of something better than any food served on a silver platter. 

All provided by one Sejanus Plinth. 

He gives Sejanus one last glare before storming out of the room.

-

Thanks for reading!

[minteayoongimakesmewoozi]

idk if you watch/read jjk but if you do,what do you think abt jjk!fits au where the Higuchis are related to the Gojo clan?I'd pity them for having to endure Gojo's bs but i admit that watching Ayame interact with him would be 10/10 entertainment

i don't read or watch jjk but my friends do and i know a fair bit about it through osmosis and wiki pages. not nearly enough to be able to make one proper au, but here's some musings from someone who only knows jjk on the periphery!

AYAME AND SATORU ARE COUSINS + SAME AGE AU

- from what i know of satoru...... poor ayame

- ayame is someone who puts a lot of pressure on herself to be calm and composed. she forces herself to remain humble, and as a result, she tends to look down on her own achievements a lot. we all know our sweet girl has low self-esteem, what can we do?

- satoru is..... basically the opposite. he's the strongest sorcerer and he knows it. it's an undisputed fact, no one else can lay claim to that title as long as he's alive.

- the higuchis are basically an off-shoot of the gojo clan. powerful enough to remain jujutsu sorcerors, but never powerful enough to be part of the big three. they split off some time in the meiji - or maybe taisho - era, although they still have close ties with the gojo clan.

- one thing about the higuchi family is that they're a family, not a clan. there has only ever been one branch in the higuchi family that can utilise cursed techniques.

in a way, you can say that it's like the universe itself makes it so. anytime there is more than one higuchi sibling who can utilise cursed energy, only one will ever be able to carry the lineage.

the history of the higuchi-family-as-cursed-energy-users is short, but the lineage can be traced back relatively easily back to the gojo clan

- ayame and satoru are cousins, but also not really. that's just because they can trace their ancestry back to one particular ancestor - and that's all.

- satoru still happily calls ayame his cousin. she's pretty much the only person in the whole world who is both unimpressed and unfazed by his abilities

- i still don't know enough about jjk to be able to give the higuchi family an inherited technique with a name, but they should have one. it should be visual-based - or maybe sensory-based that manifests as visual.

ayame is... she's not a genius at using their inherited technique. that was akihiko, but he's gone now

- (sorry for always killing you in almost every au, akihiko.......)

- if the higuchi family was a clan, ayame is the undisputed head of the clan. after akihiko, she's the most proficient in their family's inherited technique. she even surpasses her father, even at her current level

- fast forward to jjk present, where ayame is also a teacher at jujutsu high. she's teachers with the jjk sensei squad, but also tanjirou, zenitsu and inosuke

- and of course with satoru

- ayame never gets annoyed with satoru, although she does find him annoying. they've played together since they were children, when they attended gojo clan meetings together and had nothing else to amuse themselves

- surprisingly, she doesn't have an inferiority complex with satoru. she knows that they're in different leagues - satoru, as the inheritor of limitless and the six eyes; ayame as a somewhat proficient user of her family's inherited technique. they aren't the same, and that's fine. she'll do well as she is, and satoru will reign as the head of the gojo clan

- she wishes he did take his duties as the clan head a little more seriously though.....

- ayame is pretty much the only person satoru can be satoru - not gojo satoru, strongest jujutsu sorcerer, but satoru, who's kinda annoying and very ridiculous

- they're cousins, for all that the blood shared between them is as thin as air

- ayame is one of the people who uses megumi how to use weapons! her specialty is the katana, and she's the kind of person who teaches through hard work and perseverance

- also megumi using ayame's "hn" is just cute

- megumi calling ayame "obasan" will murder me actually what the heck i'm pinching his cheeks

- outwardly, it looks like he respects ayame more than he does satoru, but he actually respects them the same. they're both strong in different ways and he wants to learn as much from them as possible

- also tol satoru and tinie ayame just standing together or walking together is such a nice image. best buddies, bros just walking while ayame scolds satoru about something or another

- (if u ask satoru, he would actually admit that ayame is more like a sister than a cousin. he'll protect her with everything he's got - mostly emotionally, cos he has a lot of faith in her own strength and capabilities as a jujutsu sorcerer)

- yes there's tanyame in this. satoru ships it. nanami ships it. shoko ships it. hell, megumi, yuuji and nobara ship it! it's hard to find someone who doesn't ship tanyame. goddamn when are those two idiots going to get together already?!?!???! (satoru has screamed that phrase too many times to count)

- zenitsu, having known tanjirou and ayame since their high school days, is simply resigned to the fact that the only way they'll get together is through some superbly stupid circumstances. he just needs satoru to understand this (satoru will never understand this)

AYAME AND SQUAD AS THE SAME AGE AS THE MAIN TRIO

- the lore still applies as before, but this time ayame is infinitely more annoyed by satoru-nii

- like who wouldn't be, right? lmao

- this time, ayame grows up alongside megumi, which means that megumi and ayame share a few moves since they trained together for so long

- u know that scene where megumi and maki switch weapons? that's ayame and megumi like all the time. you don't want to double-team against those two since they've been training together since idk middle school or something

- also zenitsu senpai tickles me something fierce

- i think zenitsu would have a crush on maki. he likes strong girls and he admires the way she doesn't let her weakness stop her from becoming an amazing jujutsu sorcerer

- ayame supports this (in the hopes that zenitsu will also not let his own fear stop him from doing... well, anything, really)

- also i think tanjirou deserves to be a little jealous about ayame's and megumi's closeness. as a treat. yuuji, stop teasing ayame and megumi about what a cute couple they'd make! it isn't funny! (stop messing with tanjirou's poor heart like that!)

- i only know OF the shibuya incident, i don't actually know it. someone who knows about jjk more than me should say something about how ayame would react to it

- oh right. ayame and satoru. let's get back to the real reason we're here

- satoru doesn't try to fill in the big brother role. he might be satoru-nii, but he's still just satoru. he may tease ayame a lot and never let her get in a playful hit, but he'll be one of the first people to hug her if she really needs it. he's watched her grow up and there's something admirable about the way she doesn't let titles or the way the Big Three work stop her from trying her best and fulfilling her duties

- given the chance, he'd be the first to make her the head of the higuchi clan. if it ever became a clan (spoiler: it probably doesn't become a clan)

- i should really start consuming jjk media. After i finish fits

- but my god. what i know of jjk isn't any less sad than whatever happens in fits canon

- i think ayame would eventually be pretty fiercely protective of yuuji. she's a protector at her core, and despite his background and character lore, he'd be one of her closest friends (but seriously, itadori, stop teasing ayame and megumi about being a couple. think of how tanjirou feels!!!)

i don't know much about jjk so i'm always open to more headcanons about these aus!