#all i can see is daisy and eggsy

[drinkingflowertea]

TARON AND CHLOE?

[elletromil]

The Way of the House Husband

For @honey-bee-britt

Some crack we talked about years ago set in the Come Back (Home)

The Way of the House Husband

Harry would like it noted that, for once, he didn’t start it.

He had been doing his best to completely ignore the men that had been following after him for the better part of the day.

He even sent a text to Merlin about them, trusting that Kingsman would deal with whatever that was about in the next few days. It’s not anyone’s fault that the henchmen had proven themselves to be complete amateurs by deciding to act a mere hours after starting to stalk him.

Of course, Harry knows that he looks rather unassuming now, out of his suit, with his beard and his eye-patch. But had their roles been reversed, he would have waited at least a few days to properly establish his mark’s routine before attempting anything.

And if he walked into a deserted alley that isn’t part of his usual itinerary, it is simply because the men following him had already been closing in on him and he hadn’t want to accidentally involve any innocent bystanders in whatever was going to happen.

He had not been goading them into action. Not at all.

One of the men suddenly grabs him by the elbow to stop him and Harry sighs inwardly as he dubs that man ‘Amateur #1’. If he had had an ounce of intelligence, he would have waited for the rest of his group to properly block all of his target possible escape route before making his move. The alley Harry lured them into isn’t quite so narrow that at least one of them couldn’t have made it in front of him

But no, the five of them are all still behind him. A good push on Amateur #1 and a short run towards the nearest busy street would be all Harry needs to escape them.

If he had felt like he was in any actual danger at all.

So instead, he turns around to face the men, easily slipping out of the grip on his arm in a way that feels entirely coincidental, offering his most polite smile. “May I help you gentlemen?”

It’s Amateur #2 who answers, which might mean he’s a a leader of some sort for this group of thugs, but since he seems as much of an idiot as the others, Harry doesn’t bother relabelling him as such in his mind.

“You’d better follow us quietly gramps.”

A couple of them smile in a manner that is probably meant to be menacing, but Harry has seen fiercer expression from Daisy the last time they played pirates. He does take offence at the ‘gramps’ however.

He knows his hair is more grey than brown now, but surely he doesn’t look that old, does he?

He’ll have to ask Merlin next time he sees him. Or maybe Roxy. Eggsy, no matter how much he loves him, cannot be trusted on this.

“And why should I?”

He’s still going for hapless innocence, but judging from the worried look Amateur #5 throws over his shoulder, the mask is probably starting to slip. Or maybe that man has better survival instincts than the others and can subconsciously feel that they ’re the ones currently facing a predator.

“Let’s just say it would be better for your health. It’s your boy toy we want.”

He can feel his eye twitch lightly at what the man just insinuated about Eggsy. It wouldn’t be the first time people make an assumption about them after seeing them together, but that doesn’t mean Harry’s blood will ever stop boiling over such comments.

“Yeah gramps,” Amateur #3 continues, without noticing how Harry’s smile has hardened into something that is definitely less polite, “just don’t make a fuss. We don’t want to hurt you.”

“Oh well, that’s a relief. Unfortunately for you, I have no such reluctance.”

His smile is all teeth now and before any of the men can process what he just said, he swings the grocery bag in his left hand at Amateur #1’s face.

~

The fight is over quickly, leaving five unconscious men laying on the ground and Harry barely out of breath.

Either he’s kept in a better shape than he expected since retiring or whoever hired those men truly scrape them from the bottom of the barrel.

What a waste of his time.

He sends a new text to update Merlin on the situation and ignores his friend’s attempt at calling him. He’s already too late to start on the lasagna he had planned for dinner tonight and if wants a chance to finish plan B before Eggsy’s return, he can’t allow himself any further delays.

***

Whatever Harry is cooking tonight, it smells delicious, not that there’s any surprised there.

Eggsy deftly avoids stepping on the dogs trying to jump on his legs as he beelines to where Harry is standing at the oven in his apron, pressing his face between his shoulders and wrapping his arms around his waist. Harry, as always perfectly aware of his surroundings, relaxes into the embrace for a moment before his attention is taken back to the pans in front of him.

After the day he’s had, Eggsy doesn’t mind and just lets himself follow whatever movement Harry is making, basking in the silent domesticity of it all.

When he finally steps back after a quick kiss under Harry’s jaw, he notices the bags full of grocery sitting on the counter.

“Busy day on your end too luv?” He asks as he starts putting away the items.

“Hmm. No, not really. About the same as usual, I’d say. Tell me about yours instead.”

Eggsy knows a deflection when he hears one and usually he wouldn’t insist. Whatever it is Harry doesn’t want to say, either he’ll resolve it on his own or he’ll come to Eggsy when he’s ready to talk about it.

But then he gets to the cans and, considering how Harry has been doing most of the shopping since his return to London because he has much higher standards over quality than Eggsy does, seeing the state they’re in is kind of worrying.

“Harry? Why are these cans so dented?”

Most people wouldn’t notice the way Harry grows slightly tense at the question, but Eggsy isn’t a Kingsman spy for nothing.

“Let’s just say I had a little incident today.”

Unimpressed, Eggsy raises an eyebrow in Harry’s direction, even if the other man is still keeping his back to him. Given the fact it’s a habit he’s picked up from Merlin whenever the handler is reacting to Harry’s bullshit, there is no way Harry doesn’t know what expression he’s making right now.

“Does that ‘little incident’ have anything to do with Merlin asking me to tell you to stop ignoring his calls and also that you owe him a whole batch of baklava?”

He hadn’t worried when Merlin contacted him via his glasses when he was making his way home, mostly because the handler had only sounded exasperated, but maybe he should have. With their decades of spy work, even taking Harry’s few years of retirement into consideration, sometimes the two men have a rather skewed judgment.

“Probably.”

Harry has the decency to turn away from the stove at that point and offer him a sheepish smile.

They look at each other for a moment, until Eggsy decides that if Harry isn’t telling, then he doesn’t really need to know. If Merlin hasn’t gone into the details with him earlier, the issue has probably been dealt with already. And as long as Harry isn’t hurt, which he doesn’t seem to be, Eggsy is finding it hard to muster the energy to care.

Until he gets to the last bag, that is.

“The fuck you did to those carrots Harry?”

[tideswept]

14 and 17 for the ask meme :)

14. Are there any tropes you would only read if written by a trusted friend or writer?

Euthanasia/slow death fics. I have to be very willing to trust you. It's triggery territory for me, and while I'm experienced in handling myself, it still has to be worth the effort.

17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it?

My brain: TELL THEM ABOUT THE CRACK. Me: no, they'll judge me :( My brain: WARRIOR BOND WITH MUTUALS. SHAME IS THE MIND KILLER.

for Hartwin: Labyrinth AU with Harry as Jareth, Daisy as Toby (with Dean or Michelle having wished her away) and Eggsy as Sarah. (Eggsy possibly might have been wished away himself, but doesn't remember?)

for Obikin: MMO AU where Obi-Wan and the Usual Gang (sans Anakin) start up a company that ends up creating a hit MMO with a huge mainstream success because it's run like seasonal campaigns, and even non-gamers can play it. Obi-Wan has always been on the legal/money side, not the artistic end, and as he's getting older he's feeling unhappy with what he's done with his life. So Quinlan suggests that Obi-Wan play the game himself.

Obi-Wan does, and meets Leia, Luke and Anakin, who take one look at him and go "Oh my god, you're a noob, we must protect you at all costs" and take him under their wing. Obi-Wan learns to love the game he helped create (even if it was indirectly, by taking on the tedious work) by seeing it from the perspective of the children, and maybe starts flirting with their dad a little too much.

(Bonus point: he starts to feel like a genuine part of their family, but is hesitant to meet them in real life because that's... that's commitment, and he doesn't do commitment.)

[bluesfortheredj]

The spy who loved me.

Smut ahead. Like, seriously. Smut.

It had been a long time, a very long time, since seeing Eggsy. Even professional spies weren’t immune to the restrictions and rules when it came to lockdown. The daily texts, phone calls, and video chats had satiated your need for contact with him only so much, and you were both desperate for some intimacy with one another in person. At this point even the thought of holding his hand was enough to make you feel giddy; those slender fingers of his linked with yours again before exploring your body… it was positively breath taking.

Eggsy had stayed in London with his mum and sister in the new house he’d purchased for them only a couple of weeks before the world turned upside down and finally, now that lockdown was being lifted and you could form bubbles with other households, you were on your way to join them thanks to your job allowing you to continue to work from home; not that you were planning on working too much when you arrived. Butterflies were fluttering around your stomach as you pull up on the driveway and see his car parked half in and half out of the garage, and when you knock on the door your heart leaps as you see his familiar shadowy figure walk towards it.

He opens the door with a breathy ‘hey’ and you immediately fall into his chest before his arms wrap themselves around the body he’d missed so very much the last few months. The two of you stand there for what seems like hours yet minutes all at the same time, only separating when you shiver from the cool breeze blowing around both of you in the doorway. His hands stay on your arms as he leans away with a smile to take in the sight of you standing there in person finally, then he bends down to scoop your suitcase up and leads you inside, kicking the door shut behind you both.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” he sighs in disbelief as places your luggage down at the foot of the stairs before taking you through to the large lounge, “is this actually real?”

You press your lips to his in what begins as quite an innocent kiss but ends as a desperate, sloppy, heated embrace as he pushes you against the nearest wall before his hands begin to explore every inch of skin he can possibly touch underneath your top. Your hands grab at his jeans blindly, trying to find his belt so you could set him free from the confines of his underwear, and the two of you are freely moaning at the heightened feel of touching one another after so long. Neither of you hear the front door open and then close again, and Eggsy’s mum has to loudly clear her throat for the two of you to even notice that someone else was in the room.

“Shit!” Eggsy gasps, facing away as he does his jeans up.

“Oh my god,” you whisper with hot cheeks as you smooth your clothes down, “I’m so sorry Mrs. Unwin.”

“Sorry mum!”

“I think it can be forgiven under the current circumstances,” she chuckles, “good to see you again (Y/N)!”

Daisy sits in her pram giggling at her own foot and your heart melts at the sight of her, “it’s lovely to see you both, Daisy’s grown so much!”

“She’s eating us out of house and home!” Michelle exclaims, “she’s going through the longest growth spurt I’ve ever known of!”

“Well that’s lucky, because a little birdie told me that she’s partial to a certain dinosaur shaped biscuit, and I happen to have a couple of packs of them in my suitcase.”

“You’re a life saver,” she sighs in relief, “Eggsy, why don’t you show her around the house? I guess you didn’t quite get that far...”

“Will do mum,” he nods as a blush creeps up his cheeks, “this way.”

He picks your suitcase up and leads you up the floating staircase as you take in the very modern and expensive surroundings you now find yourself in.

“Bloody hell Eggs, this house is amazing!” you exhale in disbelief as your fingers glide along the wall.

“Nice, init?”

“Nice? Bit of an understatement!”

“Wait until you see our room… the walk in shower is to die for,” he says with a wink and a light bite of his lip, “plus we’re the opposite end of the top floor so we don’t need to be too quiet.”

You give his arm a playful slap and he takes your hand as the two of you head to his side of the house and the more than generous bedroom he got to call his own until life could continue as normal. It felt as if you were in an episode of Grand Designs with how modern and clean everything was, and you walk through the wardrobe space with long rails either side of you filled with variations of the same suit to the extravagant en suite with charcoal tiles lining the floor and walls and the biggest walk in shower you’d ever seen in your life; only one sheet of glass slap bang in the middle of the room to separate the shower area and the toilet and sink.

“This is literally bigger than my flat,” you groan, “I think I need to become a spy as well.”

“Don’t even joke about that,” Eggsy scolds as his brow furrows, “anyway, you’ve got me, and what’s mine is yours.”

“Yeah but that’s not fair for me to rely on you like that, plus I don’t have anything to give you in return.”

“Uh… I would disagree with that statement…”

“Huh?” you question as you look up at the square shower head and wonder what it must feel like underneath it.

You’re so transfixed by the fitting you don’t even notice Eggsy creep up to you until his sultry breath flows over your ear, “you have plenty to give me,” he whispers.

You shiver involuntarily as his fingers creep their way around your hips before walking along into the waistband of your jeans. Your head rolls back to lean on his shoulder as your hands grip firmly onto his forearms while his fingers tease your lips apart and stroke along your hidden folds gently, and you can feel his own excitement at the intimate touch against your backside.

“What would you two like for dinner?” Michelle shouts up the stairs, tearing you both away from your quiet moment and forcing you back to reality with a jolt.

Eggsy groans in frustration as he reluctantly retracts his hands from your body and you find yourself now completely worked up and more than ready for him to show you exactly what you’d been missing the last few months. A sigh escapes your lips as you steady yourself on the shower screen and Eggsy can see just how desperate you are to continue what he’d just started.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers.

“It’s fine, I just didn’t realise how much I missed that.”

What the two of you needed right now was, quite simply, a fuck; something that would just purely release the initial tension that had built during lockdown. You had plenty of time to make love romantically now that you were staying there, and you could take your time with it hen Michelle and Daisy were out doing the food shop or something, but what you needed at this precise moment was a quick and messy release. The two of you look at one another, knowing exactly what was going to happen, and Eggsy quickly runs downstairs to give his mum an idea of what you wanted to eat that would take at least half an hour or so to give you a small window of opportunity.

“Right,” he exhales as he shuts the bedroom door behind him when he returns, “oh…” he pauses as he sees you’re already in his bed, your clothes and underwear in a pile on the floor next to it, and he discards his own clothing on his way over to you.

“How long have we got?” you ask as he settles on top of your body and adjusts the duvet accordingly.

“Like half an hour I think?” he grins before removing his glasses and leaning down to kiss you.

He’s almost pressing his entire body weight onto you as your mouths move around one another’s in a sloppy kiss that’s more teeth and saliva than anything else in all honesty, and your hands are grabbing at every inch of skin you can get a hold of as he manoeuvres himself between your legs hastily and carefully guides his length inside your already slick walls that had been waiting for him for what seemed like so long. The sensation of him inside you and his body on top of yours once more is overwhelming, and it doesn’t take you long to fall into a fast and needy rhythm as you two of you moan unashamedly while the bed rocks beneath you. This is exactly what you both needed; passionate, hot, fast, handsy, loud sex. It was purely to scratch an itch that was in desperate need of attention, and as the need to orgasm heightens with each deep thrust you find yourselves going out of rhythm as the aching for release takes over.

“Eggsy… Eggsy!” you moan as his lips attempt to kiss your neck.

“Fuck, (Y/N), I ain’t gonna last,” he pants against your skin.

The sound of your bodies slapping against one another in quick succession drifts up from underneath the duvet and the two of you are truly lost in the haze of impending orgasms just as Michelle opens the door while asking a question that isn’t even distinguishable to either of you until there’s a gasp at the doorway which shocks you both to stillness.

“Mum!” Eggsy shouts, “get out!”

She quickly retreats and slams the door shut before you hear her practically running away down the landing towards the stairs. You look up at Eggsy who slowly turns to face you, then his lips land on yours within seconds as his hips start up again; his stiff member filling you with ease as your legs wrap around his backside.

“You know I love you,” he breathes heavily between intermittent pants.

“I know,” you nod, “I love you too.”

“Good,” he smiles, then leans his head down and bites onto your breast so he can flick his tongue over your nipple.

You cry out with pleasure at his sudden move and your hands weave their way through his hair to keep him where he is as your muscles begin to tense inside, ready for the much needed release. Before you can get to yours though, Eggsy lets out a hot, stuttered breath over your chest and his entire body tenses as he finally lets go with the longest groan you’d ever heard him make. He soldiers on after his climax and with some encouragement from his thumb rubbing over your sweet spot, you soon clench around him and release to the sound of whispered pants of his name which are emanating from your throat without you even realising. You blink away the stars in your eyes and finally look at his satisfied face hovering above you, then he flops down next to you and takes your hand in his as you both catch your breath.

“You do realise I will never be able to look your mum in the eye again, right?” you chuckle after a few moments of silence.

“Same,” he grimaces playfully, “I think we’ll just hide up here the rest of the night.”

could you make it as smutty as possible with some fluff, there visiting his parents back home and they can’t keep their hands off each other and his parents notice but don’t say anything until his mum walks in on them on the sofa in a very heated and handsy make out they apologise and try forget what happened but then she walks in on them the next evening in his room having sex there embarrassed again but still continue after she has left as they just can’t get enough of each other – Taron or Eggsy – @sarahegerton96

[brogues-b4-hoes]

Kingsman the secret service, first draft liveblog.

I’m reading the original draft for Kingsman: The secret service and being just blown away by how different but the same™ it is so I’m gonna list some things that made me go :0 

Huntsman and sons doesn’t really sound like a spy org. it sounds like a rustic b&b in the scottish countryside. Not a bad thing but Kingsman does sound a bit more “knightly” and “cool” 

Also Jack Lincoln is just not it. Harry Hart is where it’s at. 

SO about the ages: In this script Eggsy is 21, Harry is 49, Merlin is middleaged (I’m assuming that means like 44-45 ish), Roxy is 22, Charlie 23, Lancelot 39. 

Merlin was supposed to be “black, handsome” And frankly my first thought was “....Idris Elba?” lmao 

The medal Eggsy gets is called a Guinevere Cross and I immediately came up with a whole scenario of how the first Guinevere sacrificed themself in an act of bravery, which is why the Kingsman medal of honor is named after them. 

Lancelot was supposed to fight Gazelle before losing but ig getting cut in half from behind has more shock value. (Just give my boy a bit more screentime) 

I’m glad they changed Michelle’s whole approach to Daisy, cause in this script it comes across like she couldn’t care less about her literal toddler, which makes her kind of unlikeable :// I’m glad they didn’t do Michelle dirty like that in the final script. 

Arthur really was just a sexist, elitist bastard now wasn’t he (while looking at the candidates his reaction to Eggsy being proposed is “at least it’s not a woman, I mean wtf are all these women doing here??” .....There’s three women being proposed out of twelve candidates, Chester.)

On that note, I’m glad they ended up giving Merlin more of Arthur’s lines - mostly because it makes sense for Merlin’s character to play the part of handler besides being the tech wizard he is- but also Make! Arthur! Say! Less!

I think it’s an interesting choice to have the candidates be from all over the world, as I Imagine the agents who were abroad just chose the best person they could find from that area, and if that’s true then the other agents were away in: France, Germany, Denmark, Japan, Italy, Ethiopia, South Africa, India, Persia and America. Do what you want with that info.

Yeah Roxy was american originally lol

I’m glad they acknowledge the lack of privacy in the first dorm set up, because I always looked at that in the movie and thought “If I had to use a bathroom out in the open with eleven peers just hanging out behind me, I would simply not use the bathroom lol” 

Glad they cut the whole subplot of Harry infiltrating some bank, especially because it involved dressing up as a woman to get acces to the ladies room, which, given the current climate and the whole jkr situation would not have gone down well, to say the least. 

“That sounds exhausting” in which Harry is me. 

"Training starts tomorrow, which I will have nothing to do with. Watching people train is boring.” Spoken boldly for a guy who then subsequently shows up at every. single. training scene, Merlin. 

God I’m glad they cut the whole puppy obstacle course scene, it was just alot lol 

A lot of stuff is the same but what really stands out to me is how little Eggsy actually does on his own, in this version he only passes tests through dumb luck or because Harry straight up gives him the answers, which makes it difficult to root for him in this script. So I’m glad they changed that. 

Idk what to think about the implanted chip being a bluetooth earpiece originally, like who wears an earpiece all the time?..... Ig the writers thought the same thing in the end lol 

“Medic! We need a medic!” Me, internally: SO YOU ARE SAYING YOU HAVE MEDICS?? Merlin: “No we don’t.” me, internally: IM NOTING THIS AS PROOF THAT YOU HAVE MEDICS, GALEN IS CANON CONFIRMED

I like that Elton John is just fully in this movie, what exactly is it about Elton John that made Matthew and Jane continue to write him into both movies??? IS HE GOING TO BE IN THE BLUE BLOOD TOO? :0

I’d like to note that I do not like Elton John pelting shit at Valentine lol 

The way that they really wrote a whole Heathers the musical “shut up, Heather!” scene but with Arthur, Harry and Merlin saying “shut up, Eggsy!” I CAN’T WITH THIS SCRIPT

Broke: “Lady Gaga” woke: “Lady G’gar” (as pronounced by Arthur lmao) 

Okay so in a cut test, there’s a mentioning of Huntsmen security, which I will take as proof for my whole “The entire plot of TGC is bullshit because there had to be more staff at Kingsman than just Merlin, meaning more survivors of the bombing” 

AND THE PLOT THICKENS WITH THIS: Harry (to Eggsy): “Look, I’ll be back in a few days. Stay here ‘till then. I’ll call Merlin, and when everything’s calmed down I’ll take you in and finesse things. If we’re lucky we can get you a job in admin or train you as a pilot.” HELLOO WHERE WERE THE ADMINS AND PILOTS AND SECURITY IN TGC 

“Thank you. I’ll do anything. I’ll be a cleaner, even.” THEY HAVE CLEANERS TOO MATTHEW YOU’RE KIDDING ME

The ending is so different omg What is Happening? why is Usain Bolt, Lady Gaga, Jamie Oliver and Elton John fighting together avengers style? 

All in all: I much prefer the way they handled things in the final script because this felt a bit too much like the types of movies you write with your friends in middleschool for shits and giggles and less like an actual film you’d go see in theatres. But of course it’s important to remember that this mess led to one of my favorite films ever, and I really enjoyed the insight into the process and changes that led the writers to the final version. T’was very cool. 

Also I read the novelization of The Golden Circle and I can’t say which one I get the biggest yikes from (yes I can it’s the novel. It’s so bad lol) 

[madamebaggio]

OMG! They were roommates Daisy Johnson (Agents of SHIELD) x Eggsy Unwin (The Kingsman)

as chosen by me.

***

“You’re a terrible influence.” Eggsy accused from his side of the couch.

“Right.” Daisy snorted. “Just because I don’t let you act all posh inside the house?”

“I’m trying to be something different, you know?” Eggsy grumbled.

“Good for you, bro.” She teased. “You don’t need to be a completely different person all the time.” Daisy pointed out. “You can still be the same person you were before, just more mature. You’re a spy, you can be anyone you want.”

“Why can’t I be posh?” He insisted.

She grabbed the remote and turned off the TV. “Because the moment you get an excuse to not act posh you grab it. You don’t like it.” Daisy pressed. “You put on those suits, carry that umbrella and talk like a lord, but that’s not who you are.” She turned fully to him on the couch. “And that’s fine.” She told him firmly. “You changed as a person, and those were good changes. You became more responsible, learned to focus and you found a purpose. But that doesn’t mean that everything about you was bad. You don’t have to completely erase the Eggsy you used to be.”

Eggsy narrowed his eyes at her. “How come you’re so smart?”

Daisy narrowed her eyes back at him, but she was grinning. “It’s a girl thing.” She teased.

Eggsy snorted, but Daisy was glad to see him relaxing again.

Since SHIELD and the Kingsman had partnered up for the time being, Daisy was living in Eggsy’s house -he’d offered.

They had a lot of fun together; they were both more easy-going than the rest of the other agents, they liked the same tv shows and Daisy enjoyed the beer Eggsy normally bought. They thought similarly and managed to work things out in their own way.

Merlin and Coulson learned that sending them together in missions was always the best way to get work done.

They were also quite aware of the gossip that happened behind their backs. They knew everyone was just waiting for them to say they were together -there was a rumor that Dagonet had a bet going.

They weren’t dating.

Yet.

Daisy had the impression that they were both convinced they were going to. At some point, it would just make sense and they’d start dating. At least that was how she felt. She wasn’t pinning for Eggsy -as if -but she liked him -a lot -and she just felt that they were going to date eventually.

It wasn’t immediately, and she didn’t know if it would be tomorrow or the day after; she just knew it was bound to happen.

She didn’t know for a fact that Eggsy felt the same way, but he’d said things once or twice that made her think he did.

“If you’re so smart, how come we aren’t dating yet?” He teased.

Daisy almost choked on her beer. “Jesus, Eggsy. Some warning, please?”

He snorted.

“I was waiting for you to move your English ass.” She threw at him.

Eggsy hummed and took a sip from his drink. “Good to know.”

She rolled her eyes.

[myriadimagines]

Characters: @lilyswritings​​​​ x Eggsy Unwin

Warnings: —

Prompt: Your family ditches you for the holiday so I take you home with me, except my family thinks we’re dating now, and I don’t know how to tell them that we’re not.

Word Count: 552

A/N: LILY FIRST OF ALL I HOPE I COORDINATED THIS RIGHT WITH TIME ZONES BUT HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!! im sorry to be that person and combine ur birthday and christmas gift together ajksdhas but anyway ily and i hope u have a wonderful holiday 💖💖💖

“Are you sure it’s okay, Eggsy?” you nervously ask your friend, smoothing your hands over the material of your top. You and Eggsy are standing outside his apartment door, and you stopped him from opening it. He had been kind enough to invite you over to spend Christmas with him and his mum when you found yourself unable to go back home with your own family, but you suddenly felt as though you were intruding. Eggsy can’t help but smile at you, and he leans over to give you a teasing shove with his elbow. 

“Yeah, my mum will love you, and you’ll get to meet Daisy.” Eggsy reassures you. You nod, taking in a deep breath, and Eggsy continues, “Besides, it’ll be good to have you. I’ll have someone to talk to other than that prick, Dean.”

You can’t help but laugh, and Eggsy grins at you. He opens up the apartment door, and the two of you are greeted by Daisy sitting by the couch whilst Michelle frets around the kitchen, trying her best to cook dinner. She perks up upon seeing the two of you, and she wipes her hands off before rushing over to the both of you. She smiles at you, raising her eyebrows as she momentarily shoots Eggsy a look you can’t quite interpret, and Michelle remarks, “I didn’t know Eggsy was bringing home a date.” 

Eggsy’s eyes widen, and you can feel your cheeks getting hot as Michelle holds her hand out to you. You take it, speechlessly shaking her hand as Eggsy stammers out, “Uh, mum, this is y/n.”

“Oh, y/n!” Michelle’s eyes light up with recognition, and you can feel your head spinning as you wonder why Eggsy hasn’t corrected her about you being his date. “Eggsy talks about you all the time. I’m so glad to finally meet you!”

“Mum!” Eggsy quickly blurts, interrupting her, and you notice he looks as embarrassed as you do. Michelle simply laughs, and Eggsy is quick to steer you away from her, ushering you towards Daisy as he says, “Uh, this is my baby sister, Daisy.” 

“Hi Daisy,” you gently greet, the both of you sitting beside the young girl. You look over your shoulder to see Michelle return back to the kitchen, out of earshot, and you whisper to Eggsy, “What was that about?”

“I’m so sorry. I don’t know what she’s on about with the whole dating thing.” Eggsy groans, resisting the urge to bury his face in his hands. Shaking his head, he continues, “I didn’t know what to say to her. Honestly, it might just be easier to roll with it.”

You bite back a smile. You know he’s only teasing, but you can’t help but respond, “I mean, I’d be okay with that.” 

Eggsy looks up at you in surprise. Slowly, a smile spreads across his face, and your heart skips a beat. “Well, if you’re okay with it...”

“Eggsy!” Michelle calls out, and the both of you look up at her. “Will you help me with the cooking please?” 

Eggsy nods, getting up to his feet, but not before playfully winking at you. And as you feel your cheeks getting hot all over again, you think that maybe Christmas with Eggsy won’t be as nerve-wracking as you thought. 

[missredherring]

Take His Gun and Send Him Into Battle - Part One

Agent Whiskey x OFC Jolene Smith

Rating: PG

Warnings: Mentions of canon character death.

Summary: An AU where Whiskey isn’t killed and turned over to Statesman instead. No longer Agent Whiskey, Jack Daniels is going to have to find out who the man beneath the Stetson really is. 

A/N: This is going to be a slow burn. My ideas are mostly focusing on making Whiskey deal with his trauma, but I do want to slide some romance in there cos that’s my jam. This man needs help. Maybe 3 or 4 parts.

Eggsy stood over an unconscious Agent Whiskey, his gun pointed at the man’s head. His arm held firm, but his finger trembled when he tried to move it to pull the trigger. All it would take was five pounds of pressure. 

“He’d be about your age.” Whiskey had said, and the misguided life lessons and advice during their mission made more sense. The memory of showing Daisy where to get the best fish and chips in the neighborhood, their fingers and lips coated in vinegar, rose up and Eggsy lowered the gun.

“Eggsy.” Harry said. His tone was questioning but only that. The rush against time was over. The antidote had been sent out and the immediate danger was gone.

“I can’t- There’s been enough death.” Eggsy couldn’t get the rest of his thoughts out. Merlin’s sacrifice was too near, the wound of Roxy’s death still too raw. Kingsman was in tatters, and it was only luck that kept Statesmen from the same fate. 

Harry nodded. He understood the valiant heart of Eggsy well. He looked around for something to secure the Statesman with and found some tape behind the counter. It would have to do.

“We’ll give him to the Statesman and be done with it.”

Eggsy’s whispered thanks was faint, but Harry smiled. The screech of tape being pulled from the roll was the only sound in the diner for a long time.

***

Jack came to strapped to a bed. His head felt fuzzy and his whole body ached. The ringing sound of a spittoon being hit made his eyes throb and he grunted, pulling at the restraints in an attempt to move.

“You said not to make it personal.”

Jack screwed his eyes, trying to block out the harsh lighting and see at the same time.

“I- Those guys were going to- It would’ve been better-” He tried to get some coherent thought out, but everything was mixed up.

“I know exactly what happened, Agent.” Champ’s firm glare and tone held no room for argument.

Frustration and anger and grief burned in his veins. God damnit, the grief. He’d worked hard for decades to bury it and now it was sitting right on top of his chest like freshly turned manure.

They stared at each other, the recycled air of the med bay heavy between them. Champ chewed on his cheek and spit again, the action more out of habit than necessity.

“I’m putting you out to pasture, son.” Champ said, bending down to move the spittoon back into a corner. “The official story will be that due to complications with your injury you will be put on extended medical leave until you recover.”

Champ sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Jack thought he looked older in that moment than he had ever seen him. The old man was tough as nails, but the weight of the world - of Jack’s own actions - weighed heavily on his shoulders.

“I’d be a fool to believe that myself, but God knows I want to. Transport will be here in a couple of days. You’d best get your head on straight.”

The warning was clear. This was his last chance before he’d be put down. The life of a Statesman agent burned hot and fast and was all consuming.

The door closed behind Champ before Jack could get a word out, but when he did they were all curses. He yelled himself hoarse and fought against the restraints. It was useless, he knew, but he kept at it until the exhaustion took over and he passed out.

***

“You ready, Whiskey?” 

“You can just call me Jack, sweetheart.” Jack said, trying for his usual charm. His swaggering gait felt off and he couldn’t quite bring himself to leer over his sunglasses like he usually would have.

He’d been told an old Ford truck pulling a horse trailer would be taking him to the farm today and this was the only one he’d seen pull into the Statesman distillery today. It was old but kept in good shape. He felt a sudden pang for the Bronco he’d be leaving behind.

The woman who had been securing the door turned around with a frown on her face. The horse’s tail flicked out and narrowly missed hitting her. She wore dirty jeans, a jacket, and ball cap on her head. She didn’t look much different from the employees who worked in the stable across from the distillery. 

“I was talking to the horse.” 

“The horse’s named Whiskey? Should I be proud or insulted?” He tried for a joking tone, but his pride was too battered to back it up. She didn’t answer him but stepped towards him and held her hand out.

“I’m Jolene. Champ said you’ll be joining us over at the farm while you recover.” She said. It was an innocent enough statement but it made something heavy sink in Jack’s stomach and he didn’t like it at all. 

He took her hand and shook it once. Having spent the majority of the last few years dealing with business men he’d become used to the wet-fish grips of men who’d never worked a day outside in their lives. Their palms had been sweaty from their nervousness and anticipation to make a deal with Statesman and it’s reputation. Her grip was firm and her hand was calloused, catching over his own from decades of wielding the whip and lasso.

“I’m ready to leave when you are.” He said, pointing over his shoulder to where he’d tucked his duffle bag out of the way of the tourists an distillery employees.

The morning had been terrible. He’d been officially relieved of his handle and had to hand over his weapons and even his Statesman-issued Stetson. Everything he’d packed to take with him had been gone through and the new Agent Whiskey herself had given him a pat down before he left headquarters. There was no one who knew Statesman tech like Elizabeth and she’d know on sight if he’d tried to sneak anything out. To her credit she hadn’t looked like she was enjoying the process too much.

“I do hope you get the help you need, Jack. Honestly.” She’d told him before the doors closed between them, shutting him out of the intelligence side of Statesman. It was that earnestness about her that’d always rubbed him wrong and it felt no better today when he was effectively left to fend for himself.

Jolene nodded and patted the side of the trailer on her way to the driver side door.

“Alright. Grab your bag and let’s get going.” 

Jack did so and as he made his way around the trailer he looked inside and made eye contact with the horse, Whiskey. It snorted and stomped a hoof as if telling him to hurry up. He didn’t need to be told twice, suddenly eager to leave the distillery and what lurked beneath behind.

[playbucky]

The One

Requested by @spiderdahlia - Eggsy imagine request please! The reader is Eggsy's best friend since childhood and one day he just sees the way she acts with his mom and sister and he realizes his in love with her and she's the one he wants to marry. Very cute and fluffy please. Characters – Eggsy x Reader. Word Count – 690 A/N – Y/F/N equals your favourite meal

‘You alright Eggsy?’ You asked, he shook his head slightly before blinking, he smiled widely and nodded. ‘With you here, always.’ He replied, you rolled your eyes before you turned to the small baby in your arms and talked to her. ‘Y/N love do you want to stay for dinner?’ Michelle asked you, you turned to her. ‘May I ask what it is?’ You asked. ‘Why so you can decide whether it’s rubbish or not?’ She teased you. ‘Never, everything’s amazing that you make.’ You told her, she smiled. ‘It’s so I know whether I’ll be crashing with Eggsy cause I’ve filled myself up and can’t move.’ Her smile grew and she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. ‘Y/F/M.’ She told you, you gasped and looked at Daisy ‘Eggsy, you better be ready to cuddle.’ You warned him, when he didn’t respond you looked up and he was staring at you, but you knew by the look he had on, he wasn’t in this planet.

‘Marry me.’ He said, appearing in his room behind you. ‘What?’ You asked confused, you had just pulled on the shirt. ‘Marry me.’ He repeated again, you still shook your head as you looked at him as if he had grown an extra head. ‘Eggsy are you feeling okay?’ You asked, raising a hand and pressing it to his forehead, but he reached up and grabbed it bringing it to his chest, pressing it against the warm skin. ‘It’s you, I want to marry you.’ He admitted, you were sitting on his bed as he stood in front of you. ‘Okay, you’ve said that but your talking gibberish now.’ ‘I love you, I know it’s the cheesy fallin’ in love with my best friend, but I couldn’t imagine my life any other way.’ ‘You know everything about me, include things you really shouldn’t know and ones that have scared past people away but you’ve always stayed with me.’ He told you, rubbing your hand as you stared at him shocked. ‘Eggsy.’ You said, but he shook his head. ‘No.’ He said. ‘Please just listen to me.’ You begged him, he nodded. ‘I’m not gonna marry you, at least not now.’ You said, smirking slightly. ‘I mean, we’ve got to date a least a year before we do anything serious.’ You said shrugging your shoulders, you looked up at him and noticed he was gaping like a goldfish. ‘Shut your mouth or you’ll catch flies.’ You told him, reaching up to his chin he snapped his jaw shut. ‘Are you serious?’ He asked. ‘Would it be cheesy to say that I always fancied you, at it sky rocketed when you showed up in my room in the middle of my night with a suit on.’ You told him, he smiled and chuckled. ‘You’ve got a good punch on you.’ He said, remembering that you punched him in the gut before switch the light one when he groaned out his name. ‘Yeah, well we did grow up together.’ You reminded him. ‘And I wouldn’t change it.’ He said, wrapping his arms around you before pushing your back on the bed, you let out a groan. ‘Get off me, your suffocating me.’ You groaned out, he simply rolled onto his back and pulled you on top of him. ‘Is that better?’ He asked, his face still tucked in your neck. ‘Much.’ You said. ‘You know, I think all the mums around here had a bet on us.’ You mumbled into his shoulder, he let out a laugh before you pulled back and looked at him. ‘Who do you think won?’ You asked him, he looked at you and his brows dropped. ‘Either mum, your mum or Cathy on the third floor.’ He said. ‘Why, Cathy?’ You asked him. ‘She’s like a witch.’ He replied and you burst out laughing. ‘You know we could just ask Michelle?’ You offered to him, he tilted his head to the side and shrugged his shoulders. ‘We can ask her at breakfast.’ He said, compromising. You nodded before you moved to get comfortable so you could both drift off to sleep.

[elletromil]

Hi Elle!!!! Omg that single parents AU idea was so sweet ♥

<3<3<3 Here’s some more for you dear ;)

-

When the doorbell rings, Harry and Liam are still in the process of washing the dishes from lunch.

Harry sees his son’s eyes go wide with excitement and he nearly trips down the stepping stool he still climbs on to reach the kitchen sink properly in his hurry to get to the front door. “Daisy!”

“We don’t know that yet,” he calls after him as a reminder to not actually open the door without him present as he takes a second to dry off his hands.

But of course Liam is still waiting even if his fingers are already on the lock. Harry would still rather he hadn’t touch it at all, but he’s willing to let it go for once. After all, it’s Liam first play-date where a friend comes over as he usually only sees his friends at the park when he’s not at school.

But Eggsy, Daisy’s father, had suggested the play-date when they had picked their respective kid up Friday afternoon. Harry had been slightly hesitant, but he would have to be deaf, blind and probably brain-dead not to have picked up on the fact that Daisy and Liam were well on their way to become ‘best friends’. It’s all very cute.

He nods at Liam to finally opens the door and it’s no surprise to see Eggsy and Daisy on the other side. Eggsy is holding the little girl by the shoulder, probably to stop her from propelling inside the house without a proper invitation first. Harry knows he’s done the same with Liam whenever they visit his parents or Merlin.

“Daisy!”

“Liam!”

Of course no one is currently holding the little boy and the two children are hugging each other within seconds of the door opening. Well, tackling would have been more like it, but thankfully Eggsy managed to keep everyone up-right even if Daisy definitely stepped on his foot.

He doesn’t seem to mind at all though, judging by the grin on his lips.

“Heya Harry, may we come in?”

He hurries to step aside, letting Eggsy usher the children inside.

Before he can say anything, Liam is showing their guests exactly where they should be putting their shoes and it takes less than a minute before the two children are running towards his bedroom.

Harry watches them go fondly. He wasn’t really sure what to expect from the play-date, but apparently the children are perfectly capable of entertaining themselves. It’s... kind of a relief to be honest. He loves Liam dearly, more than life itself, but he’s the first to admit that he’s out of his depth sometimes.

He wonders if Eggsy ever feels the same. Sure he hasn’t had much interactions with him outside of idly chatting together when they’re waiting on the kids after school, but he’s never mentioned having doubts or difficulties of any kind with Daisy.

“Would you like some tea?”

“Oh my god, yes please.” Eggsy is looking at him like he’s the Seven Wonders all wrapped up together.

“Rough morning?” he hasards a guess as he leads them towards the kitchen.

“Mmhmm. Daisy was being a hellion. Which, I completely understand considering she was excited for her first play-date, but yeah. I haven’t really had the time to sit down.”

At the words, Harry gently pushes him on the nearest chair and tries very hard to ignore the butterflies that are set off in his stomach at Eggsy’s little groan of satisfaction when he sags into it. He’s known he had a thing for the other man since... since he first saw him actually.

And he’s pretty sure that he’s not imagining Eggsy being interested back into him, but...

But he’s got Liam to think of and Eggsy has Daisy. And Harry hasn’t dated since before Liam was born.

He hasn’t even thought about dating until a few weeks ago when Eggsy suggested they exchange numbers just in case. And sure, Harry has been too much of a coward to actually text him, but he would be a liar if he pretended he doesn’t think about it at least once a day. Though in his defense, Eggsy hasn’t texted either. Except earlier today to say he was on his way with Daisy, which really doesn’t count.

Anyway, right now is not the time to think about all this. He’s got some tea to make. And even if the kids seem to be fine on their own right now, Harry knows it’s only a question of time before he’s needed. Or before he worries too much and goes to check on them.

[stronglyobsessed]

If you’re still taking prompts, I’d love Merwin with Merlin realizing how much he loves to hear Eggsy talk when put in a situation where he can’t hear him (be it Eggsy in the hospital, on a secret mission with no audio, or whatever you want) and deciding that he’ll do whatever he can to make sure that not another day goes by without Eggsy’s voice in his life :)

If I’m ever not interested, or willing, to write angsty hurt/comfort Merwin, assume I’ve been replaced by a poorly designed clone ;).

Breathe...

There were many times Merlin assumed he’d never hear the sweet sound. A soft, gentle whisper where the warmth of his lover’s breath brushed against his ear, or the mirth filled chuckle through mission audio. How quickly Merlin knew it could be torn away. Assignments where Eggsy’s life was put at greater risk than the average man. There was always that uncertainty, that perhaps Merlin’s job wasn’t enough to bring the young agent home. To bring his husband home.

A relationship with a Kingsman agent brought so many risks. Some more deadly than others. So the last thing he’d expect to hear, were the voices of sorowful cops.

“...an accident.”

“...rushed into the ER.”

Merlin felt all the air leave his lungs. His chest ached with need for oxygen that his body just stopped providing. How could he be concerned with something as vital, so important to his survival, when he was being told his husband fought for his own life.

“...cab ran a red light. T-boned him before he could see it coming.”

It was painted for him. An accident Merlin hadn’t witnessed with his own eyes, but be damned if he wasn’t going to pull up surveillance around the city. Though revenge was the least of his worries, especially when his presence was needed at hospital. Merlin was fortunate to be dressed for the day, though he doubted clothing would be of a concern, and followed without question. He left behind a curious JB, and made sure to notify Harry on his ride. Thankful the cops offered him a lift; Merlin was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to drive himself.

Worry. Merlin lived in a constant state of worry. He had to learn to separate it from the job, needing to be the best he could be, guiding all agents; his own husband included. Worry was well ingrained by now. And worried he did, but he never once accounted for worry that would be brought by a civilian accident. Not when Eggsy faced the worlds villains on a regular occurrence.

Suddenly that bright, sunny laugh that resonated through their home, when JB did something that tickled Eggsy, or Michelle sent a video of Daisy walking on her hands, it all vanished. It was as if, in their five years of marriage, he worried for the first time he’d never hear it again. Or how Eggsy crooned their wedding song when missions went poorly, and Merlin was left feeling failure and regret. Soft melodies that caused him to yearn for a child, hoping one day Eggsy would sing tender lullabies to their children.

These were things Merlin worried, mourned the loss of, before he had a chance to find out how bad Eggsy was. Logistics didn’t concern him, not as he barreled through hospital doors, demanding information before he gave his name. His heart pounded, doing leaps and bounds against his chest, threatening to bust through his chest cavity and rush to find Eggsy. The man who was his world, every reason for living, his physical, breathing, living heart. Who at this very moment lay on a surgical table as London’s finest surgeons removed a lung—damaged beyond repair, Merlin was told—and repaired his shattered femur. The question of his ability to walk without assistive devices were on the table, but none of this was what troubled his mind. If Eggsy made it out of this alive was of the utmost importance.

It felt like years, decades, before he was given more information.

“...he made it out.”

“...if he wakes...”

IF he wakes. Merlin felt his heart stop, breathing halted at the notion Eggsy could possibly leave this Earth.

“...a long road ahead of him. He has age on his side.” They ran down the list. Four broken ribs, removed lung, repaired femur, broken humerus and wrist. All on the right side. Multiple contusions, bruises and swelling accompanied the ever growing list.

Merlin thanked them, and counted the seconds until he was permitted to see him. It was hours, Merlin was sure, when a nurse called his name. He felt numb. Unaccustomed to being the one to receive the information, and not the informer.

“We have him under a medically induced coma, to help him recover from the trauma.” The nice, short middle-aged nurse said. Bethany, he read her name tag, guided him through double doors that proclaimed this area the ICU. “He can hear you,” she promised with a gentle smile.

The expression was thought to bring him comfort, but he felt little right now.

From the right side Eggsy was near unrecognizable. The swelling was so sever it nearly took up his whole face. Merlin would have been afraid to touch him, but took some comfort that he could caress his left arm, avoiding wires and IV’s as he did. He didn’t speak for a long moment, afraid if he tried, he’d break down and if Eggsy could hear him, his ears would be filled with the sorrow of his husband. That’s not what Eggsy needed to hear now, not when his life hung in the balance.

It was as if Merlin’s voice was taken, too. Because he barely said a word since he’d been brought here. Only enough to insist on answers when Doctor’s gave updates. He waited, with baited breath, when they eased the sedatives three days later. Pleased with Eggsy’s recent MRI results, the swelling on his brain had gone down. They were uncertain if there would be any lasting damage from traumatic brain injury, unable to determine that based on his scans.

The first signs were slight, hand twitching, involuntary movements that confirmed Eggsy was in the process of waking. It wasn’t like you saw in movies, where the injured woken and recognized their surroundings, or even the person who sat beside them. The process was far slower, painful as it were to watch, and took a solid week before Eggsy opened his eyes.

They were unfocused and blearily scanning his surroundings. Merlin would have jumped the first moment Eggsy did this, but he knew not to startle him. He very carefully reached over Eggsy to press the call-light, earning attention to himself even as he tried to avoid it.

Glossy blue-green eyes widened for a moment, until recognition washed over his features, and his eyes softened.

Before he could speak a word, hoping to coax a small response out of Eggsy in desperation to hear his voice again, nurses and his surgeons arrived. Merlin was ushered out in order for an examination to be done, and by the time he was allowed back in, Eggsy was asleep again.

They told him he’d wake sporadically. Eggsy may or may not address him, but this was the process. Again, not flowery and romanticized like films. It was a long, grueling thing. Torture to the one who had to watch it, but watch he would.

And he did wake, on and off, sometimes he stared at Merlin, others it was just quick little spirts that didn’t even last thirty seconds. A day went by, hours passed where Merlin hadn’t seen Eggsy’s gorgeous eyes. His longing grew. When would he wake WAKE and just say his name? The answer was not an easy one to bear. Time, he was cautioned.

On the second day, when Merlin was sure he’d slip back into a coma and never speak to him again, Merlin began to sing their wedding song.

The Way You Look Tonight, never sounded as smooth off his tongue. His voice was too deep and certain notes were beyond his abilities to match Frank Sinatra. Though that never seemed to be a problem for Eggsy.

Merlin was on his second attempt at the song, feeling sure he butchered something that repressented the best day of his life, when someone softly said:

“I sing it better.” The voice was rough and scratchy, a hushed whisper that could barely be heard. “Hamish.” It was his name spoken by this foreign, yet familiar, voice that earned his attention. Eggsy’s eyes locked with his, realization filled the pair that Merlin loved so much.

All he could do was chuckle as tears filled his own, spilling down his cheeks until they soaked his face, and nodded. “Aye. Ye do.” He wouldn’t voice how relieved he was to hear Eggsy speak, not when his careful kiss said it all. “I love ye,” Merlin whispered in a rush, worrying Eggsy wouldn’t be up long enough to hear that.

Dry, chapped lips drew up in a crooked smile as Eggsy’s left hand fumbled to hold his. “I love you, too.”

Eggsy didn’t say much more past that, not for another day, but it was everything Merlin needed to hear to keep hope.

His heart would pull through.

[agentsandbutterflies]

I don’t know if you’re still taking prompts but could you do something with Reggsy where Eggsy finds out she’s alive after defeating poppy? Or when he goes back to Statesman head quarters

I do still take prompts! I am however painfully slow at filling them, I’m sorry.

----

The last few days have been like no other days in Eggsy’s life.

That’s saying a lot seeing how the last two years have been. His home was destroyed, Kingsman wiped out, Roxy was murdered, all his colleagues were murdered, Brandon was murdered, his dog was murdered, Merlin fucking sacrificed himself for him, Harry came back from the dead...

...and somewhere in the middle of all this, he’s managed to befriend Elton John?

He’s running on fumes as he makes his way from the cab to his mum’s front door. He knows he should have insisted on Harry coming with him, but when Harry had said no at the offer Eggsy had no energy to argue with him about it. If Harry wants to torture himself by staying in Merlin’s flat, then it’s his choice. Not like Eggsy has a leg to stand on anyway, seeing how he had lived for two years in a shrine dedicated to Harry.

Daisy comes running as soon as Eggsy’s in the door. She throws herself at him and he almost starts crying when he gets down on his knees to hug her properly.

-x-

Eggsy is still dazed and jetlagged when he picks up Harry in his mum’s red Honda the next day. Harry looks about as worn down as Eggsy feels and it doesn’t help that he’s wearing Merlin’s clothes. A not insignificant part of Eggsy’s energy goes into not yelling at Harry for it.

Again, he does not have a leg to stand on here.

“How did you sleep?” he asks when they stop at a traffic light, because he can’t help himself.

Harry gives him a all too knowing look. “Sleep?”

“Yeah.” Eggsy sighs. “I think I still have a prescription of Zimovane if you want some.”

“I think scotch will have to do until I can get my own.”

Eggsy hums and starts driving again as the light changes. He finds a parking spot a few streets from Savile Row and they walk the last way to the shop. Or to where the shop once was. Eggsy can’t help thinking that the last time he was here, he pointed a fucking gun at Merlin. Makes his stomach turn.

The area is closed off, but people are still coming and going. Eggsy frowns. It’s… It’s a construction site? That’s not, that’s not right!

“Hey!” he yells, walking faster, not caring that he’s leaving Harry behind. “Hey! Stop that! You can’t--”

“Eggsy?”

Eggsy stops dead. Standing there, in a hard-hat, with red, angry marks over her entire face and her arm in a sling, is Roxy. She seems just as surprised and confused to see him as he is to see her. Eggsy feels like there is a fair chance he’s hallucinating.

“...the fuck,” he whispers.

“Ms Morton?”

“Harry?”

Eggsy looks between them. Well, at least he’s not hallucinating if Harry can see her too. Roxy just keeps staring at the both of them as if they are ghosts. He can’t blame her.

“How about a coffee?” says Harry. “There’s a decent place on Cork Street if I remember correctly.”

Roxy laughs. Or sobs. Then she starts to run towards them. Eggsy stumbles back when she hugs him the best she can with one arm, hitting him in the face with the hard-hat. He holds her close, burying his face against her neck.

This time he does start to cry.

-x-

The café Harry remembers is still there. They sit around a small table, Roxy holding Eggsy’s hand in a tight grip. For the longest time, the only thing she’s managed to say is “but you’re dead.” Most of the time it has been directed at Eggsy, but every fifth or so has gone to Harry.

In short, very concise sentences, Eggsy tells her what happened. He tells her about Charlie. About finding Harry. About Merlin. About Poppy. He doesn’t talk about Whiskey or the Statesmen, because there are just too many people around. He also leaves out Elton John for now, because he’s pretty sure she won’t believe him.

She tells them -- or Eggsy, she only looks at Eggsy -- about waking up under a pile of rubble. About slowly suffocating and about deciding not to. About getting to hospital. About not being able to contact anyone at Kingsman. About coming back to the shop and seeing the ruins. Her story is even more chopped up than Eggsy’s, at least until she says:

“I realised that if I’m the only agent left, it’s on me to rebuild the agency. So I decided to start with the shop.”

Eggsy stares at her in shock and awe.

Harry, on the other hand, bow his head slightly. “Arthur.”

Roxy starts giggling. She leans over, resting her head on Eggsy’s shoulder. Eggsy grins, happy and confused and not at all sure this is real yet. Still he brings their joint hands to his lips and kisses Roxy’s.

If this is a dream, he never wants to wake up.

[darcyfirth]

For your incredibly generous fic-gift-giving: Hartwin! I'd be so happy with pretty much anything, and cheesy is my jam! :) As for a trope, how about decorating for Christmas and/or leaving out food for Santa with Eggsy's little sister? If that doesn't work for you, maybe the two of them got snowed in on a job somewhere and Christmas just happens to them?

I love both of your ideas and since this fic fill is months late I’ll combine them into one cheese-ball monster :’)

“I’m afraid I can’t make it home in time, Eggsy,” came Harry Hart’s muffled voice on the other end of the phone. He had left for a quick transaction in Russia several days ago and meant to come back to their house before Christmas Eve. This year’s snowfall certainly made it a tough job for Harry to keep his promise.

“That’s alright, Harry,” said Eggsy, not letting the hint of disappointment seep into his voice, lest Harry grew anxious of letting him down. “You can always find a way to catch another flight after the storm’s settled down.”

“I will, Eggsy,” Harry said firmly.

“See you soon,” whispered Eggsy before the call is hung up, by whom he didn’t know.

“So Harry’s not going to be here with us on Christmas morning this year?” Daisy asked. She was standing next to Eggsy during the phone call, holding a plateful of cookies freshly baked out of the oven.

Eggsy smiled ruefully and mouthed a soft ‘No, Daise,’ and when he saw how his little sister’s shoulders drooped down visibly, Eggsy gently ruffled her hair and said, “But he’d be here with us on New Year’s Eve.”

“You’re right,” Daisy exclaimed happily and stood on tip-toe to set the plate on the table, next to a glass of milk which Eggsy had poured minutes ago.

Eggsy led his sister by her hand to the bedroom, kissed her forehead goodnight and wished her a merry Christmas like he did every Christmas. He returned to his own room next to her and texted his mother, who was at her company’s Christmas party, to come home safely after or call him to pick her up, whichever worked for her. 

Then, Eggsy set his phone on his bedside table, a thing he rarely did at 9PM on a weekday, and tried to think nice things, happy thoughts, and without a shadow of doubt they all happened to be with Harry.

*

It was several hours later, a long time after Eggsy had opened the door for his Mum and went back to bed, when he heard the creaking sound coming from outside his window. The leaves rustled as their branches were weighed down by something that was decidedly not a bird.

Eggsy carefully picked up his bat on the floor, a Kingsman gun or umbrella was out of the question for this kind of intrusion anyway, and stealthily crouched next to the shadowy area in his room, where the moonlight could not reach.

He waited. Several broken branches later, his window finally swung open by a man’s hand, one Eggsy thought was eerily familiar.

The index finger immediately pointed up as his other fingers curved into a fist, oddly enough, Eggsy could imagine that the intruder was trying to make a point to him somehow.

“Eggsy, please kindly put down your bat and help me up,” said Harry Hart’s voice, a strange turn of event, as his voice wasn’t supposed to be in London at this hour physically-speaking.

“Harry, you are Harry?” Eggsy said, dropping his bat with a clang.

“Yes, and you are Eggsy, my fiancé, soon-to-be husband,” Harry joked, and Eggsy honestly would find a deserving rebuttal to his smartass comment had Harry wasn’t dangling with half his body out of the window right now.

“You said you wouldn’t be able to make it home in time,” Eggsy complained breathily as he helped pull Harry’s whole body into the room.

“Oof,” Harry gave a little noise of relief once he finally landed on something soft. The soft thing was Eggsy.

“You’re here,” Eggsy grinned, not bothering to move an inch from his current position.

“I’m here,” Harry echoed, cheeks slightly flushed from the exertion of his juvenile climbing and sneaking around.

Hands finding themselves wounding around Harry’s neck, Eggsy leaned upwards to kiss his boyfriend soundly on the mouth.

“Did you lie to me?”

“Not really. I was in Russia and there really was a storm, hours and hours ago. Then I just expedited things up a little.”

“A little?” 

Harry kissed Eggsy back instead of replying, both of them knowing the real answer to it already.

“Did you set out cookies and milk?” Harry said minutes later, mouth no longer attached to Eggsy’s.

“We did.”

“Can I have some?”

Eggsy laughed. “Cookies? Course. Not the milk though, it went bad.”

“Shame,” said Harry, pulling Eggsy up without much hassle at all.

They both trod lightly down the stairs, fighting the urge to giggle like a couple of teenage kids, shoulders to shoulders, barely an empty space between them.

Harry started to work his way into the plate of cookies eagerly, as if he didn’t have a proper meal before coming here.

Eggsy held his hand and beamed at their intertwined fingers, Harry’s ring finger had his engagement ring on, the mission was really over.

“What’s the matter?” asked Harry, swallowing the crumbly chocolate chip bits.

“Nothing,” Eggsy shook his head, eyes shining because he couldn’t help it, “just, merry Christmas, love.” And he brought Harry’s hand up to kiss his knuckles, softly and gently.

Harry was a tad surprised at Eggsy’s sentiment, it showed on his face as he paused mid-bite, but he soon recovered and smiled, genuine and fond, “Merry Christmas, Eggsy.”

[fyrapartnersearch]

Going to attempt to keep this short and sweet, although for actual roleplay I enjoy a good mix of quality and quantity - without branching into purple prose.

21+ (seeking 18+ partners for 18+ characters) and currently residing in the UK. I am looking for someone who is down for regular replies. Whilst I understand and respect that real life comes first, I’m unfortunately without much to do until September so I’m looking for long-term distraction.

I have no limits but would ALWAYS respect yours. I enjoy slow-burn, forbidden romance, angst, fluff, smut... everything under the sun. Let’s discuss what we enjoy. I’m down for OOC chattering and would like a partner who is happy to share pictures, playlists etc. But this isn’t a requirement, just something I enjoy!

I also love side characters. I’m not keen on doubling per se but I love being able to write and give personality and story to other characters. Parents, friends, that random girl in the coffee shop... let’s make them stand out. I typically enjoy m/m and f/f mains only but I am happy to include m/f as a side ship and play any gender.

Okay. The good stuff! Bold is who I want to play.

Fandoms:

La Casa de Papel

- Berlin/Palermo

- Palermo/Helsinki

- Nairobi/Tokyo

I have got various plots in mind for any of these ships, both canon and AU.

Doctor Who

- Clara/12

- Jack Harkness/The Doctor (Open to any Doctor from 9-12.)

The Umbrella Academy

- Diego/Klaus

So, it’s coming back soon! Anyone else excited? I’m buzzing to see them all again. In terms of Diego and Klaus, I’ve seen a few cute pieces of art around that I’ll link my partner to and would love to pull from. One that recently hit my pinterest feed was a Pushing Daisies (anyone remember that??) AU in which Diego is still a cop and Klaus helps him solve crimes by communicating with the dead. We could take this anywhere. Make it that they’re still related and wind up reconnecting - either in a different way or as canon with Reginald’s death. Or we can have it that they meet randomly and don’t know each other, maybe Klaus gets arrested and in a drug-fuelled state ends up babbling about something that helps Diego and Patch solve their case.

So open to other ideas for these two!!!!

Misfits

- Nathan/Simon

I’d also be very happy to work with a crossover between TUA and Misfits with any sort of crossover pairing or just working with the different characters. Also more than happy to just write Nathan/Simon on their own. Maybe how things would have played out if they’d got together.

Vis a Vis (Locked Up)

- Maca/Zulema

- Saray/Zulema

Kingsman

- Harry/Eggsy

Would love a AU for this. Let’s make them the same age, living in different parts of the city. Class differences. Maybe they meet when Harry sneaks away from his family and ends up near the estate. Forbidden romance. Secret meetings. Angst galore.

Originals:

- M/M or F/F. Character A and their opposite sex partner seem like the perfect couple living the perfect life. Then Character A’s partner announces they are going abroad to stay with their family for a while. Suddenly Character A finds themselves infatuated with Character B, their partners cousin/childhood friend/distant sibling... Lots of drama available here. Slow burn. Forbidden romance. Summer romance. I would prefer to play Character B for this!

- M/M or F/F. Heist. Not much of a plot for this but I would love to work with a LCDP vibe. This could be robber/hostage or robber/robber. Although you don’t necessarily have to have watched La Casa de Papel for this, I would be keen to have someone willing to do a bit of research into the premise. I would like to play a robber in this. I don’t like playing ‘strictly good or strictly bad’ characters nor do I like trying to make bad people seem actually good but with the nature of LCDP, I’d enjoy there being a good reasoning behind the robbery. A revolution of sorts.

- M/M. Small Town Monster. Kind of Stranger Things. Character A is a Police Chief/Politician/Beloved figure in the town. Maybe a widow? Maybe a father? Older. Character B is a bit of a trouble maker, petty crime etc. When trouble comes to the boring town in the form of some sort of creature, the two of them end of coming together to fight it and love blooms along the way. More forbidden love. Age gaps (all 18+) and secret meetings in the midst of chaos. I’d like to play Character B for this!

- Good Omens type story. Angels and demons hate each other (obviously) and are always trying to one up each other. This time, Hell decides to send a Demon in disguise to Heaven. Let’s just pretend it’s plausible. What the demon never expected was to end up very attracted to an Angel. Funny workplace shenanigans. Angst. Smut. Forbidden romance. A big event overarching? Let’s chat. I’d like to play the Angel as well as taking on any angelic or demonic side characters.

Human/Demon with a twist. The apocalypse has come, but instead of zombies it is simply the rise of the supernatural. The creatures are living in the ruins of the new world, ruled by a King (Demon or really any supernatural creature). Humans, like in all apocalypse stories, are fighting for their lives. Constantly on the move. Killing each other as well as the creatures. Several of them have formed large groups in an attempt to end this horror show. I’d like for there to be some sort of threat to the supernatural community too, beyond just humanity. An ancient creature who some of them worship and believe to be a more fitting King, perhaps.

More forbidden love tales, as one day a human in one of those groups fighting the supernatural ends up hurt. I would really like to start this off with either a supernatural creature or the actual King (in disguise or not) helping to patch him up. I would like to play the human, as well as taking on any human or supernatural side characters!

- Bring me YOUR ideas! I’ll hear anything out and be honest about what I think and if I’d be interested or if we would vibe. Let’s chat!

My email is middleofthemultiverse@yahoo.com

[madamebaggio]

Notes: Haunted House AU

***

“If I die here, you better hope you die too, because if you survive, I’m going to haunt you for the rest of your miserable life!” Daisy hissed furiously at Eggsy.

“Now, love…”

“Don’t call me that!” She snapped.

“How was I supposed to know this was really haunted?” He wanted to know. “I didn’t even believe this bullshit before!”

“Well, welcome to real life! Where -apparently -murdering ghosts are a real thing.”

Eggsy put his hands on Daisy’s shoulder. “Hey, take a deep breath in.”

She did as told, trying to calm herself down.

“I’m really sorry I got us into this, ok?” He told her softly and earnestly. “When we get out of here, you can kick my ass all the way to China.”

Daisy snorted a laughter despite herself. “What if we…”

“Hey.” He chucked her gently under the chin. “We’re getting out of here. I got you into this mess, I’m getting you out.”

“Ok.” She sighed, took another deep breath in. “I’m sorry for freaking out on you.”

Eggsy shrugged. “It’s kinda cool seeing that even you have your limits. Drunks harassing girls? Punch them in the face. People being rude to waiters? Tear them down. Haunted houses? Fuck no.”

“Fuck no.” She repeated. “I’m gonna get my hands on this ghost and kick its butt.”

“That’s my flower.”

[taronunwin]

Think about who Eggsy was at that time in his life. He’d probably already been friends and enemies with the same people as when we first meet him, he’d probably toyed with drugs and guns and alcohol and sex and everything else his friends were doing but somewhere along the way, he decided he wanted to do something more with his life. Maybe it was someone he knew from school, someone who wasn’t all that different from him, had a pretty hopeless future in front of him, and this guy suddenly stopped showing up at school and when Eggsy asked around about him, assuming the worst, he learned that this kid had left to enlist as a Marine.

And two weeks later, Eggsy still couldn’t shake that.

It haunted him in a way—the knowledge that the guy got out of this life and was now on his way to doing something actually important. So Eggsy, having just turned 18, and after a ‘party’ that his Mum insisted on having that ended with Dean coming in drunk and telling Eggsy’s friends to get the hell out before he started throwing beer bottles, resulting in Dean passed out on the couch while Eggsy and his pregnant Mum picked up the glass, that he decided he was done with this and he was ready to enlist.

He also decided that he wasn’t going to tell his Mum because she’d just tell him that things were going to get better. She’d been saying that for years. And even after Eggsy had pushed harder than he ever had to get her to leave with him before the baby was born, willing to risk angering her to the point of her choosing Dean over him, she still was determined to stay and make it work. Eggsy had never understood her loyalty to a man who treated her like he did, but he knew that somewhere, deep down, it was because the man she’d really loved, Eggsy’s father, had died and now his Mum was determined to never lose someone else again, no matter how rotten they were.

But Eggsy couldn’t live by her standards. So one night, without telling her, he packed his duffel and snuck out at 3 a.m., leaving a note in the fridge on a bottle of juice he knew Dean would never touch. It simply read, “Mum, I’m going to do something good, I’ll call when I can.”

And he enlisted right away, immediately feeling a sense of pride that he’d never felt before—pride in himself for breaking away from the life that was threatening to choke him. And to his own surprise, he started making friends. Sure, some of the guys were dicks, that was nothing new, but some weren’t and they accepted him and mirrored his own nervousness and feelings of being unqualified. But those worries dissipated as he started going through training and discovered he was actually really good at something for once, and not just stealing or committing petty crimes. No, he was actually good at doing good.

Didn’t matter how early he was awoken to do a drill or how many hours they kept him up to test his endurance, he never wavered, never gave up. His CO took him aside one day when he was reaching the halfway mark, thoroughly exhausted but still running on the thrill of making himself into a man his Dad would be proud of, and said, “Son, you’ve got exactly what it takes to be a Marine. Your parents must be proud of you.”

Ironically, two days later the only parent he had showed up on the base, somehow finding out where he was, and made a huge scene, demanding to see her son. When Eggsy heard about it, he hesitated. He knew if he saw her crying, screaming, no doubt hiding some bruises from Dean, he’d cave; he’d go back for her. And he just didn’t want to do that. Not even a little bit.

But when his CO called him to the main office, he knew he didn’t have a choice.

Walking through the door, he found exactly what he’d expected: his Mum sobbing, heavily pregnant, and broken by his absence. He immediately rushed to her, kneeling in front and holding her head to his chest as she clung to him. “Eggsy, please, don’t do this,” she begged through her sobs. His eyes squeezed shut, fighting tears. He couldn’t bear to see her like this. “Please, baby, don’t do this, you’ll die, and you can’t die, you’re all I have, please!”

Hearing that, he pulled away and angled her face, holding her there until she finally opened her eyes. “Mum… did you leave Dean?”

She lowered her eyes, ashamed, answering his question as loudly as if she’d yelled the reply. Eggsy wanted to punch something. But instead he pulled her tight to him again, allowing her tears to soak into his uniform.

He knew this was his only chance. If he gave this up, he’d be stuck in a life he hated with no way out because his Mum would never let him try anything like this ever again. His body was shaking with anger and panic.

“Please, Eggsy,” she repeated against him, almost drunkenly from her weariness. “I can’t lose you, too. Please don’t make me lose you, too.”

He felt broken inside. The pride he’d had in himself slipped away as he looked at his CO who stood nearby, watching silently, and felt the man’s pity. Minutes passed as Eggsy wavered between his two options, this feeling like the most pivotal decision he’d ever have to make. Finally, with tears burning his eyes, he stood, pulling his Mum to stand with him. “Come on, Mum. Let’s go home.”

Her wet eyes widened. “Do you mean it, luv?”

He nodded once, his jaw clenched so tight it hurt. “Yeah, let’s go.”

His CO gave an affirming nod and quietly said something about making an excuse on his form. “Family emergency,” he called it. Had he let Eggsy title it, he would have chosen “Family obligation.”

Dean started laughing at him as soon as he walked in the door of the apartment, saying, “Ah look at the big man, off to war. You look like a f*ckin’ idiot, ya prick. You really think you'da been able to make it? Nah, you’re a coward. Always have been, always will be.”

Eggsy pushed him away, resisting the urge to make good on his training, and, as usual, stuffs that anger down. He went into his room, slamming the door and locking it behind him with a lock that only worked half the time, and slowly, once he’d cooled down, began peeling off that armor, the uniform that made him feel taller, stronger, more like his Dad, his eyes constantly returning to the picture of his Dad on his cabinet as he returned to his clothes and popped his cap back on. It felt all wrong now, but… it would have to do. He’d fake it until it felt right again, if it ever did.

And he went out that night to the pub, didn’t bother giving his friends the real reason he’d been gone for so long, instead saying something about a girl and a trip, which they only half bought, and he drank until he couldn’t remember the Marines anymore.

Days passed after he moved back home and he felt a gaping void inside of him as the days blurred together, mornings spent staying in bed as long as possible before Dean banged on the door, demanding he get up and do something for him.

The only good thing that happened after was that his Mum went into labor and little Daisy was born. That gave Eggsy something good to focus on.

And the first night in the hospital as his Mum slept, after Dean had left for home, Eggsy stood by the window holding his new baby sister, humming softly to her. Her eyes opened and focused on him and he smiled down at her.

“I’ve got you, little one. Don’t worry. I won’t let anything bad happen to you.” And he meant it. That would be the good he could do now.