#aliens can be named weird stuff

[magickpancakes]

(WIP) full body of my gal, Fillet

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

the vitriolic hatred most people have for things that look weird is so upsetting to me sometimes :(

[savanir]

A sister's love

The justice league hurriedly responds to a call for backup at a little in the middle of nowhere place by the name of Amity Park. 

The situation had seemed so simple. 

A Star Sapphire had suddenly shown up on Earth which isn’t immediately cause for concern but she was unidentified, so a lantern was definitely going to have to look into it if only just to make sure that nothing bad was going on. There are two planet side green lanterns, Simon and Jessica. So they responded to handle the potential situation. 

Things rapidly spun out of control when they realized it wasn't just a Star Sapphire. 

"I hate to say this but we're gonna need backup" Simon tells Cyborg, "the Star Sapphire has brought something with her. My first guess was a white martian but..." The other one can do some manner of density shifting, and he can go invisible, but they know ways around that. Whatever this one is doing isn’t that though.

"Why isn't this working!?!" Comes Jessica's slightly panicked voice in the distance, "he keeps just going through my creations! dammit, think think Jess" She tried to contain him with a flamethrower construct but he just ignored it, like he’s seemingly ignoring everything else she’s throwing at him.

"Our constructs have zero effect on the other one, the alien, meta? man I don’t know he’s human shaped" 

"What is the situation other than the two hostiles?"

"Uh we got some government agents who are retreating because of the Star Sapphire wrecking their stuff. And the civilian people here seem to be falling under her influence, so she must be human. She's from here, she needs emotional connection to pull that stuff off."

The people are furious, the violet glow around them clearly indicates that the girl is using her ring to amp them up but if Simon didn’t know any better he’d say this was red lantern stuff.

Well there are more ways to whip people up into a frenzy, by hurting their loved ones for example.

There is a brief moment where it can be heard that Simon and Jessica try to get into a more advantageous position. 

Simon grunts, "dammit, those agents seemed to have weapons that actually worked on the other guy but the Star Sapphire used her violet constructs to shield him and destroy their guns and we've been struggling since" this whole situation stinks, he has a weird feeling about all of it.

"Simon this is really really bad, i can't keep restraining all these civilians, we're running out of energy fast!"

Cyborg tries to get a visual on the situation from his position in the Watchtower while he’s notifying any league affiliated heroes who are nearby and available. 

But all of a sudden he realizes there is just nothing, just a big lap of void where the two lanterns are supposed to be, there is no cctv footage, no cell towers, no internet connection. Just what the hell is going on here.

Then the audio transmission starts to violently crackle.

A new voice laced with static can suddenly be heard, "There you two are"

"Shit"

"Is the justice league coming yet? Are they finally going to do something?" the staticy voice continues.

"Stay back you-"

"Or maybe they still need more of a reason to act" 

The audio cuts out. 

"Jessica! Simon! Come in!" ... "Shit!" 

Cyborg finally gets a clear picture with the satellite cameras and now sees the entirety of Amity Park has been covered with a crystalized violet dome. It’s then that he remembers the story Hal told quite some time ago now about a Star Sapphire who managed to put a whole planet into love stasis.

They are gonna need more help with this one he thinks.

Meanwhile Jazz is still shakily trying to figure out how her new pink powers work, now that all the fighting is over (for now), the GIW forcefully expelled from Amity, and the two Justice league people captured and restrained.

Everything happened so fast, one moment the GIW had knocked out her brother and were forcefully taking him away and while she saw them drive off (she was pretty sure she was screaming) a pink thing just froze her in place, She was pretty sure someone said something about “great love in her heart” and then she was… well she was flying and- and there wasn’t really any time to question things then so she may have kinda gone and ripped into the van that had Danny.

She’s pretty sure she healed him, and then things just completely spiraled out of control from that point on. and now she’s here.

She’s pretty sure this is crazy villain behavior, she’s going to get put on some sort of watchlist and then she’ll never get to be a psychologist but it’s fine.

Her little brother is safe, that’s all that matters. And she will keep it that way.

[bittershins]

went camping and someone found GLOW IN THE DARK FUNGI!!!!!! coolest shit, totally made up for being so sweaty that I lost all hope. Maaaaaaybe made up for getting two ticks

[obsessivevoidkitten]

The Invasion

Cat Man Alien Yandere x Gender Neutral Reader

CW: Painful noncon, reader gets smacked, biting, collaring, owner/pet, pet reader, reader tied up, reader is an idiot, alien invasion, shapeshifting, general yandere behavior

Word Count: 1.2k

(Popped into my head, finished at 2-3am this morning, hope you all like it. Please leave comments and consider tipping to support the senior's bake sale, I love you all <3)

Twiggy was a rescue. He had been brought into the animal shelter you worked at and was pretty injured. Once he was nursed back to health, you immediately adopted him.

He was a bit standoffish, even by cat standards, but he slowly seemed to tolerate you. Then, almost actually like you. It's like he would enjoy affection and then catch himself and hiss before running off.

Even though you made sure never to let him outside, he always seemed to get out anyway, mostly in the dead of night. 

In an effort to discover just how he was escaping, you set up cameras. But they always ended up knocked down or broken before catching anything. Then you put a cat cam on him, but every night, he would fling it off after you went to sleep.

You had enough. It was getting creepy. You decided you would follow him. He never tried to leave while you were awake, though, so you had to pretend to sleep. 

The sound of the door could very faintly be heard closing, so you got up silently and slunk into the living room.

Astonished, you looked at the door. It had been unlocked, and Twiggy was missing. He had somehow figured out how to open doors. It wasn't entirely unheard of for a cat to manage a door handle, but the lock?

You quietly left the building and saw Twiggy moving with purpose down the road.

After a while, you thought yourself stupid. He was just going to do random cat stuff. Why were you following him? He probably just smelled something that gripped his attention.

But as he kept going through various alleys and back roads, a few other cats joined him without any reaction from him. They proceeded in orderly and determined fashion right into the old abandoned factory. 

You followed and had to hold back a gasp at what you saw. Down in the basement level was Twiggy standing on a pile of scrap with dozens of other cats gathering below him.

It was some sort of cat cult. 

But if you thought that was shocking, you hadn't seen anything yet. Suddenly, Twiggy effortlessly shifted into a nude man with curly brown hair, a tail, and cat ears on his head.

After he transformed, all the others did the same. The room was filled with naked men and women with tails and cat ears. This was getting too weird. The best course of action now was to make a silent retreat.

As you began to back away, Twiggy pointed in your direction and stated something you were too far to really hear.

In a flash, the cat people were upon you, dragging you over to Twiggy and forcing you to kneel before him before they tied you up and gagged you so you couldn't speak. 

He addressed the others without sparing a glance at you. 

"I infiltrated this human's place of employment and then their home." 

He stroked your hair in a manner similar to the way you would pet him in his cat form. 

"I have learned that we can use their workplace as a front and get adopted as their pets. We will use this method to infiltrate every home before taking over and turning humans into OUR pets!"

Twiggy turned to an androgynous looking cat person.

"River, I need you to take the form of this human and work at the shelter as we discussed at the last meeting. Come over tomorrow to my human's house, and I'll give you the schedule."

River nodded in affirmation.

After that, the meeting came to an end, and Twiggy dismissed the others. He pulled the gag off of you and allowed you to speak.

"Twiggy, w-what's go-"

The cat man smacked you harshly. It left an echo resounding through the large empty room. 

"That's a gross pet name. My real name is Declan."

You whimpered and then flinched when he pet the spot he had smacked gingerly. 

"Sorry, I shouldn't have hurt you, you didn't know… You probably have lots of questions."

Of course, you had questions. And Twig- Declan… answered every one of them patiently. 

He explained that the cat people were aliens who just happened to have a form that looked like a common earth house pet. They could also look like any human they wanted, though they had to hide their feline features. He was the leader. And now that you were aware of everything, you got to be the first pet. His personal one. He promised to treat you well.

After the Q&A, he put on some clothes he had and took you back to what was no longer your house. He put your gag back in so you couldn't scream on the way.

True to his word, he treated you like a precious pampered pet, since you had helped heal him and took such good care of him. He even gave you a jeweled collar for you to wear as proof he owned and cared for you.

Though he had started to care about you in ways that he probably shouldn't have.

But after a while, he couldn't help it anymore. One night when your head was laying on his lap while the two of you watched a show he liked, something he forced you to do as he stroked your arm and side, his cock stirred under your head, and he had to give in.

He stripped you of all your clothes; you struggled and protested, but his strong, lean body easily overpowered your own.

He pulled off your collar and bit your neck hard to get you to submit as he mounted you, before shoving his cock in you deeply all at once with no preparation. 

The cat man fucked into you ferally, going off pure instinct, pushing your head into the couch cushion so no one could hear your screams.

You were sure you were going to die, that you were going to be split apart by his girthy cock, that the last things you would hear were your muffled screams, the sound of his nuts slamming into you, and his animalistic growls.

Declan's cock pistoned in and out roughly as tears streamed down your face. You felt a sense of shame as he forced you to orgasm despite the cruelty of the way he was violating you.

It wasn't enough that he took your house, job, and way of life and eventually would take your planet, but now he was claiming your insides with his throbbing cock as well.

He came in you roughly and finally seemed to gradually come back to his senses. He licked away your tears and the blood and cum that were mingled and leaking from your hole.

"I'm so sorry, I just couldn't help myself! I'll be more gentle and use lube next time, okay?"

The cat man comforted you as best he could, bathing you as you sobbed. He sincerely regretted hurting you, but he couldn't deny his instincts and really needed some release. Going forward, he decided you would be his mate as well as his pet, so he didn't go wild with pent-up emotions again. 

[keferon]

Sorry in advance for the word vomit but. I love the whole Jazz-and-Prowl figuring out the language barrier but also consider:

They don't.

Prowl's been captured by Quintessons and is currently thinking of ways to completely scrape his processor so they can't get any useful data, only to get rescued by a random mech. They fight their way out (the mech is extremely proficient in combat). At first he thinks it's a drone- it looks at him when he asks questions but doesn't answer (responds to noise, not language), it is sparkless (not alive) and it makes random but entirely incoherent noises and doesn't even ping (not able to communicate). Prowl has no idea what's going on but he's too injured to make it back to base alone and it's helping him? So. He chalks it up to some waylaid stealth military asset and tries to think of ways to both get it back to base whilst also making sure it's not some sort of Quintesson Trojan-horse [10%].

Meanwhile, Jazz was sent to blow up a Quintesson command camp by his organisation but instead he got thrown through a weird portal, and found a pilot all tied down and probably being tortured so naturally he busted him out but uh. He has no idea what the other is saying. He's talking in total tonal gibberish. Not that he's judging, he's heard some stuff about how far other piloting programs are willing to go to advance neural technology. And his face! He has one! A handsome one. Must be some advanced shit because he's got micro expressions and he's using them to frown as him. Anyways, Jazz's got bigger fish to fry. The sky's a different colour, there are two suns and atmo is reading terribly low levels of O2. Maybe he and this pilot got thrown into an alien planet? Cool- well, actually pretty bad but hey they're in this together.

Prowl knows by models that they're bound to run into another Quintesson patrol eventually, and based on the drones alertness to its surroundings, his previous observations to its capacity to fight, and how it doesn't stray to far from him, if patrol numbers are favourable [1-8 range] they can survive [70, .5]% the route back to base. But the drone is reckless and abandons him to the melee (how can a drone be reckless?) and Prowl gets injured worse. Energon drips from wounds, and the angle makes it challenging for him to patch it. But the drone creeps closer, folds to its (knees? Its joints are in an odd but effective configuration) and gently (gently?) begins to mimic (clumsily) Prowl's motions of patching his wounds. Here is where Prowl falters, because drones are not so careful. Drones do not do not look up multiple times at his faceplates, and become more delicate when they see you in pain. Drones don't hold out a servo and help you to your pedes when your done. Which begs the question, if he's not a drone, so what has been done to this mech?

Jazz on the other hand is freaking the fuck out. Naturally. Because uh, he started slicing Quints, expecting Frowny to do the same because his mech was still clearly operational, only for the idiot to completely disregarded normal combat standards which can be summarised as 'fight hard or die' and instead get chewed on by some big ass teeth.

Only to see the glowing purple dripping from his torn sides, only to see that he's bleeding.

Machines don't bleed.

So Jazz figures out Frowny is an alien first. He starts pointing at himself and saying his name, insistently, until Frowny repeats it. He points at Frowny, and records and replays whatever sound bite Frowny makes until Frowny's also nodding in confirmation. He still calls him Frowny, because even though he has his name? Probably? He has no idea what it means and can't actually pronounce it (no idea how to get a mouth to move that way) but hey! Progress! He does this again and again with small things (rock, hand, cyber?animals, music (Frowny's confused at that one it's pretty adorable) ect.

Prowl has no idea what to make of this strange mech. Is he a failed experiment? A runaway from Cybertron following the Functionalists rise or power? Thennn Prowl finds out one fateful night that the mech is actually an alien organic (in a fit of misunderstandings, and squeezes him pretty hard for it ouch and feels SO guilty about it later) and suddenly the language/culture barrier makes way more sense.

Prowl's injuries degrade (a line splits). He has no way to communicate this except for the energon dripping out of his chassis. The organic is clearly worried (how did he think he was ever sparkless), and Prowl can't reach the injury himself. So he guides the mech's servos past armour and wiring, down to protoform (near his sparkchamber) to the split line. Gestures and hopes the mech can figure out what to do from his miming[#^%]. That'll he'll be careful, and won't hurt him [5%, 87%, #*%, *########%].

Frowny is later picking shrapnel stuck in his forearm that's too small for him to remove, so Jazz gets out of his mech to help with his small human hands. Jazz has no way to communicate to Frowny that if he moves, he'll sheer Jazz's limbs clean off, but he goes in anyway, because Frowny's hurt, and speckled in blood. Because he's clearly struggling and hurt and tired. Because Jazz has to trust that he won't.

Frowny's injures eventually make him collapse, and Jazz carries him the rest of the way. Jazz has no idea how they'll be received (especially considering how Frowny reacted when he found out Jazz was organic). Jazz knows he might be dissected. Knows he might be pulled apart (again) but.

He remembers all the little moments they had on their journey (Frowny shielding him from falling rubble when Jazz was out of his mech once, them getting to gesticulating arguments, Frowny's reaction to his music, how he fell asleep on Jazz once and it was fricken adorable).

It doesn't matter that Jazz can't say (barely understands) his actual name. That Frowny probably doesn't understand his. It doesn't matter that they talk in halting miming, in broken sound clips and touches and half-glares.

He's already gone out on all his limbs, might as well put his head on the chopping block. And if it causes him to lose the damn thing, well.

He's a pilot. Dying horribly is practically his job description.

OOOUUUUGGGGGHHHHHHHHH DYING HORRIBLY IS PRACTICALLY HIS JOB DESCRIPTION,,,,,,,,,,,

[creature-wizard]

"How can I be a witch/pagan without falling for conspiracy theories/New Age cult stuff?" starter kit

Posts & Articles

Check your conspiracy theory. Does any of it sound like this?

Check your conspiracy theory part two: double, double, boil and trouble.

QAnon is an old form of anti-Semitism in a new package, experts say

Some antisemitic dogwhistles to watch out for

Eugenicist and bioessentialist beliefs about magic

New Age beliefs that derive from racist pseudoscience

The New Age concept of ascension - what is it?

A quick intro to starseeds

Starseeds: Nazis in Space?

Reminder that the lizard alien conspiracy theory is antisemitism

The Ancient Astronaut Hypothesis is Racist and Harmful

The Truth About Atlantis

Why the Nazis were obsessed with finding the lost city of Atlantis

The Nazis' love affair with the occult

Occultism in Nazism

Red flag names in cult survivor resources/groups (all of them are far right conspiracy theorists/grifters)

The legacy of implanted Satanic abuse ‘memories’ is still causing damage today

Why Satanic Panic never really ended

Dangerous Therapy: The Story of Patricia Burgus and Multiple Personality Disorder

Remember a Previous Life? Maybe You Have a Bad Memory

A Case of Reincarnation - Reexamined

Crash and Burn: James Leininger Story Debunked

Debunking Myths About Easter/Ostara

Just How Pagan is Christmas, Really?

The Origins of the Christmas Tree

No, Santa Claus Is Not Inspired By Odin

Why Did The Patriarchal Greeks And Romans Worship Such Powerful Goddesses?

No, Athena Didn't Turn Medusa Into A Monster To Protect Her

Who Was the First God?

Were Ancient Civilizations Conservative Or Liberal?

How Misogyny, Homophobia, and Antisemitism Influence Transphobia

Podcasts & Videos

BS-Free Witchcraft

Angela's Symposium

ESOTERICA

ReligionForBreakfast

Weird Reads With Emily Louise

It's Probably (not!) Aliens

Conspirituality

Miniminuteman

Behind The Bastards

[skelly-words]

Stuck on a Desert Island (Bring Your Tentacle To Work Pt. 4)

idk why my brain's been so empty lately this took me a year, anyway... this is for u bae @ellieangelbee (also an ask that i accidentally deleted but it was prob you too)

this is so weird and random, but i wrote it with my whole heart

tags/warning- monster fucking, non-con, aphrodisiacs, feat. random coworker (f/f), it's algae/slime stuff, idk i'm being creative

wc- 1.5k

You've been hiking for hours, trudging behind your coworker through the beachy forest. The two of you walk along a postcard coastline somewhere in the Virgin Islands.

You knew it was gonna be an 'adventure.' That's what your boss, Amelia, had called it when pitching the idea to you two. 'The adventure of a lifetime.' Experimenting with alien life was difficult and risky, but if you managed to find a useful botanical specimen... For now, you can only dream of the cushy office and generous 401k plan.

So you're hiking in 90 degree weather and humidity that makes it feel like you're drowning on dry land. Your shorts stick and chafe against your inner thighs. Every few steps you're stretching the spandex back down only for it to bunch up again. Your coworker walks a few paces ahead. A line of sweat drags down the back of her tank top as she flips through a book to identify native flora.

-

It's nearly sunset when you stumble upon something new. A couple moonpools reflect the golden sky. Luminescent algae grows out from the pools, covering the entire rock interior of the cool cave. Near the pools, the glowing green algae is most dense, thinning to a sparse lawn of polyps at the edges of the organism.

"What is it?"

You watch her set her satchel down. She pulls out a few containers to gather samples. You quickly kneel near in the mouth of the cave to help her. The ocean is at your backs and the open maw ahead is lined with the blue-green glow of algae.

"I dunno. We're just surveying the area. This is..." She trails off and drops the specimen jar. "Does something smell to you?"

You both take a deep inhale and shuffle forward toward the fragrant pools. The algae is slippery and you have to crawl on hands and knees. The goo coats your skin, getting everywhere, making your clothes cling uncomfortably. And there's still that funny smell. It gets more distinct the closer you are to the pools, but stays light on the air. When you sit by the edge of the moonpool, you can almost taste it. Cacao butter, Brazil nuts, toasted coconut. Your coworker catches your shoulder before you can lean in.

"Wait. We don't know what it is, right?" She sounds far away even though her breath bats against the back of your ear. "Lemme try first."

You watch her dip a hand into the pool. First up to her wrist, then elbow, and finally reaching down and pulling up a handful of the sandy bottom. It drips from her hand, making waves of light ripple through the algae wherever it lands. It looks beautiful, almost hypnotizing.

"Wow," you mumble as the water trickles from her fingers.

Your hand dips into the water next. Dribbles run from your fingertips at first, handprints on the ground as your crawl around the edge of the pool. It's even more humid in the cave and the temperature rises as the setting sun centers itself in the opening.

You take another deep breath, trying to shake the fogginess, finally being hit by the exhaustion of the hike. The air is so thick with that scent of sweet oil. You lean down and splash water over your face, letting it run down your neck and chest. Your nipples perk up under your tank top as the icy water hits you.

"Let's just..." You trail off, almost forgetting what you meant to say. "Let's just get samples and..."

You look toward your coworker, trying to remember her name, what company you work for, the point of collecting samples. The shorts you're wearing need to come off. They're so itchy. All of your clothes makes your skin crawl, and your companion feels the same way as the layers start to peel away. The space between you narrows with the shifting floor. The spongy floor dips slightly and you slide together into the divot.

The slime coming off the algae gathers at the bottom and along the sides so every movement inches you closer. Your ass hits the floor with a splash and the liquid coats you thickly, tingling on your bare skin. You want to cry out in disgust and tell your friend to get it off, but you still can't remember what to call her or what the hell the two of you are doing. Plus, she's also covered in the stuff, more and more so as she tries to drag herself out of the small pit in the algae.

"We're stuck." She comes to rest against you at the bottom. Her legs tangle up with yours, scrunched into a pretzel in front of you. Her butt sticks up like she's trying to show you the mess of slick she's collected between her legs. You can tell the viscous blue slime from the needy stuff dribbling out of her pussy. Your fingers drag through her slit. It’s so wet. Strings of slick stick to your fingers as she jerks away.

"Where are we?" She asks, flipping to face you.

"Um, who are we?" Your hand drifts up to your mouth and you taste you dirty digits.

"We, uh- well, I- I'm..." The other girl opens her legs to slide closer to you and the walls grow around you. Her arms wrap you into a hug and a leg slips over your hips to pull your bodies flush.

The touch makes you feel complete, so soothed and comforted. Tendrils begin to sprout, thin and wiry and wrapping around you. They twist together, one over the other, into vines that snake over your body. Your wet cunt presses against hers when the appendages yank your legs apart. The puddle of goo squishes when you shift and grind together, humping against each other as the aphrodisiac in the slime makes your clit pulse harder.

She groans, trying to lift herself off the bottom of the pit as the floor swells. Peaks begin to rise out of the gummy algae to bump at your holes. Her efforts to get up force you to sit back harder on the lumps. They stretch and stiffen in your pussy. Both of them worm their way up to your cervix before swelling up to full size.

You can hardly take being spread this wide. Your friend rubs her engorged clit against yours. She grinds on the tentacles stuffing you full and makes them press deeper. The bumpy texture distracts her from the tendrils shoving into her until they start to expand. One pushes into her tight pussy and the other fucks her ass open. She takes it so well, latching onto your nipple to muffle her moans.

"I'm c-cu-" Your hips buck up involuntarily as you cum as you grasp blindly at the slippery walls. Your cunny is too full, clenching weakly around the two limbs. One of them jumps inside you, twitching and vibrating. A load of thick cum empties out of it as the tendril shrinks back to its original size.

The glowing goo coats your folds as she drags her puffy mound up and down. She tries to talk around your tit, "I'm so- g-gonna"

More of the thin sprouts work their way inside your puckered ass and spent cunt. Her hand reaches down, spreading her glistening lips apart. She pinches her clit between two fingers as you jump against her. The excited tentacles swell and burst inside you. Your eyes roll back, hips lifting helplessly into the air to meet her carefully guided rhythm.

Her teeth catch on your nipple as she talks. "They're kissing. I'm making them kiss." She goes back to sucking on the hard bud and using her free hand on the other one. She mewls at the sight of your cute clits sliding together. Yours throbs and pulses as she picks up speed. The thick bed of tentacles between you makes it impossible to push your bodies together and she humps you harder, making sure her sloppy cunt presses to yours as she squirts. You moan while her lips drool around you, spurts cum on you, only adding to the shallow pool surrounding your tangled bodies.

The pulse on your clit makes you spill over the edge. A milky ring of cream forms around the vines of algae stuffed inside you. It mixes to a blue cream as you ride them, smearing the juices together.

Your friend has a swell in her stomach. You watch it change as the appendages empty and fill inside of her. There must be at least a dozen in you. If you could see over where she's playing with you, you'd see a matching bulge in your tummy. They feel especially good when they buzz, right before implanting that thick seed.

Her pussy twitches and cums again, this time releasing only a small dribble of piss. It mixes into the slick dripping down your thighs. The puddle just gets deeper. You slosh in it to grind your slutty cunts together because you can't help it. You need more, another release. The spongy tentacles take their turns keeping you full. They’ve made you into a perfect toy, just like your friend. Both of you take at least ten in each gaping hole. And that should be enough. But your hands can’t stay off each other. You pinch and toy with her pink nipples while she massages your cunt. She knows exactly how to make you squirt now, after spending so much time with her hand between your legs. And it's never too much. Every time the overstimulation starts to hurt or your but feels sore, one of the vines jumps and ejaculates. The soothing jelly fixes it up and you're back to being fucked brainless.

You have no idea how you got here, but why would you leave?

A/N- I think this is a fitting close to this series. tysm for 700. maybe vore bc they might've been digested, idk.

[tlouwhore]

modern!ellie headcanons

notes/warnings: pet names used (baby), sfw, loser!ellie a little (i cant help it), no race specific information, androgynous reader

★ she has an insane mug collection thats so strange, when you go to hers for the first time its such a weird thing

"you want something to drink?"

"sure"

and you'll go back to messing with her stuff that she left sprawled across her coffee table until you hear her clomp over and extend her arm, she'll be holding an inconveniently built mug out to you casually

"els, what the fuck is that?"

she tilts her head and furrows her brow, confused at your comment as if its unreasonable to ask why shes handing you a horrifically constructed alien mug thats bound to spill all over you

★ speaking of these mugs, she refuses to get rid of *any* of them. when you guys move in together you're begging her to just get rid of one but she refuses

"els, please. we dont have enough shelves for these, we need normal drinking glasses."

you sigh as the mugs sit across the kitchen counter, shes on one side staring at them while youre on the other side staring at her.

"i cant, i use them all"

she doesn't. she drinks out of one and she only ever drinks water from it. you go back and forth for merely minutes before you throw in the towel and just let her do her thing, if shes happy you dgaf about the normal water glasses.

★ shes a loud ass walker, you will hear her before you see her. you genuinely start to think she's doing it on purpose.

★ she has one belt and its one wrong move from completing snapping in two pieces, there is a literal half inch of material holding it together

★ needs to pet street cats every time she sees them, whenever you point out that they're probably diseased she scoffs

★ tries to pretend shes good at fixing things but has no clue what shes doing—the toilet isnt flushing properly and so she stands about 3 feet from it and stares at it with her weight shifted to one side. she'll have on a tank top on and slacked down carhartt pants engulfing her legs as she nods. she really likes to take care of you so she'll refuse to admit she has no idea what shes doing and when you walk away she looks up "toilet not flushing reddit"

★ she fucks with the twilight franchise but pretends to hate it because it doesn't "look cool"

★ she cant drive, she failed her permit test 3 times and pretends like every other driver on the road is the problem (shes the issue every time)

★ she drives a beat up car or truck, it smells a little funny and the radio gets three stations so you have to rummage through her mass cd collection to find something to listen to. half the cds wont even be in their case but instead haphazardly chucked around her car in random spots. the only ones she keeps in order are your cds, which have a specific bag so you don't have to scurry about in her car to find them.

★ 3 pairs of socks and they all have holes in them, she'll complain that the floor is cold all the time

"god the floor is so cold in here"

"can you just put some socks on?"

"i'm wearing socks right now"

"oh really?"

and she'll point as her feet, half her toes are out and her heel is fully exposed. its about the same as just wearing no socks at some point. you'll just stare in disbelief for a moment before scoffing.

"what'd you do that for?"

that small crease between her brows finding its way to her face as it always does.

"you're barely wearing socks"

"oh whatever"

★ has to physically restrain herself from telling you the gift she bought you for any holiday or event, shes tweaking out and cant function until she gives it to you

★ she loves to just be in your presence, she'll observe your routines. she enjoys perching next to you as you get ready, no matter how short or long or a routine she will be by your side

★ she can cook a crazy burger but that's literally all she can make

★ shes a blushing mess for you but she loves to get cocky and pretend she isn't when texting you

★ needy and will message you thirst trap ass photos in an attempt to get you to leave work early and be with her (it works)

[revelboo]

oh my GOD the way you write the scavengers has me melting, holy shit, thank you for the absolute feast

A Lifeless Ordinary Pt 3

Scavengers x Reader

• “Big TV’s talking again,” Spinister growls, lowering the organic onto the console and completely ignoring the look Krok levels at him. Reaching out a servo to nudge you away even though you shoot him your own look and make a deliberate show of walking around a button rather than over it. You don’t bother to offer him the hand gesture at least, seeming to mostly reserve that for Spinister and Crankcase. “We’ve been over this. It’s not a TV. Someone go see who’s hailing us,” Krok says as you sit precariously on the edge of the console, legs dangling. And stare him in the optics with that uncanny intelligence.

“Yeah, yeah,” Misfire mutters, rising from his seat and hesitating when you snap your little fingers, all heads turning to stare in surprise at the noise. Watching you touch your own face, then point at Crankcase. “Huh. Facial paralysis again? You should let Spinister fix you,” Misfire says, reaching to pat you on the head with a servo and smiling crookedly when you aggressively swat at him. There’s the angry hand gesture. Crankcase’s own hand lifting to offer Misfire the same gesture, because even not knowing what it means, it’s obviously not a friendly gesture.

• “We’re being hailed by someone named Swindle,” Fulcrum calls from the back and Misfire’s wings flick up aggressively. “He’s a crook,” Misfire yells back. “Don’t answer it.”

• “Answer it,” Fulcrum counters, venting tiredly as Spinister reaches across him to try and nab you and nearly knocks you off the console. “I’ve heard of him. Sold to both sides during the war and always had all kinds of contraband. See if he has food for organics.” Carefully curling his servos around you, he stands and heads toward the back where Swindle’s face is grinning widely at them all. Keeping you cradled to his chassis, Krok reaches with the other hand to push Spinister’s arm down when he starts to lift his weapon at the screen with a muttered ‘TV’s talking.’

• “Greetings,” Swindle says, leaning in closer. “Out here on the fringes, supplies can be a bit hard to find. But I’ve made it my mission to help my Decepticon brethren. For a price. Energon. Engex. Whatever you need. What about your little human? Hard to come by human stuff out here,” he adds, spreading his hands.

• “Human? This is a human?” Misfire asks before Krok can, waving a hand at the organic in his grip. “Do you have its language files?” Krok demands, taking a step toward the screen and watching Swindle’s grin become predatory.

• “For a price, friend. I have anything and everything for sale.”

• Docked with Swindle’s own vessel, Krok watches Spinister and their human picking through crates of human things. Extremely overpriced human things, he’s almost certain, but seeing how excited you are as you chatter to yourself and hold up a sparkly covering the same purple as his armor plating, it’s hard to be too annoyed. “You sure you want the language file? They’re cute until you can understand them,” Swindle says, watching them all with the air of a thief appraising his own kind. Probably not unwarranted as Krok spots Misfire and Crankcase both subspacing little things behind Swindle’s back.

• “I’m sure,” Krok says as Fulcrum picks up a stuffed toy animal as big as you are and offers it to you. Watching you smile hesitantly and reach for it, saying your nonsense. Pointing and making that weird snapping sound with your fingers to ask to see things. Being able to really communicate would help, though. “Humans are spacefaring?”

• Tucking the oversized teddy bear against your hip with the spangly dress draped over a shoulder, you lean to dig deeper in the nearest crate. Sucking in a breath and digging out a package of Oreos and hugging them to your chest. Because food? You’re starving and while your scary aliens have tried to find you food, it’s been hit and miss. Mostly miss and ending with you curled into a sick ball of misery. You have no idea who the smiley one is or why he has all this stuff, but that greasy smile makes you think of a used car salesman. Practically screaming untrustworthy.

• “They can barely make it to their own moon,” Swindle mutters as Misfire starts digging through a crate of foodstuffs. “Yours is far from home. A pet abandoned after the war I’d guess. Probably got tired of listening to it whining.”

• “I’ll risk it,” Krok insists, watching your excited little dance as you clutch a tiny blue package to yourself and then turn big pleading eyes his way. Language barrier or not, your message coming through loud and clear. They end up pooling their remaining Shanix and having to cull the pile you and Spinister have made into necessities. Feeling bad as you relinquish the slinky, purple covering, but having to let you keep the toy because Spinister gets agitated when Crankcase tries to take it from you and it’s not worth someone getting shot over. The language file is handed over last as Misfire corrals you into his hands, that blue package still clutched in your hands like you’re afraid it’ll be taken away from you.

Previous

Next

On the hunt for pins and buttons

[botanyshitposts]

Hey! I'm not a botanist, but I'm in circles where it's a bigger thing and I'm kind of curious about something.

So, from an outsider's perspective, the genus Garcinia has a lot of weird and messy classifications. For example, common species like G. intermedia and G. gardneriana are really similar to Garcinia brasiliensis, to the point that it's pretty controversial if they're actually separate species. The Garcinia species colloquially known as "achachairú" also appears to bear a lot of similarities to that trio (although much less than they share with each other), HOWEVER it's almost exclusively referred to (in cultivation and in studies) as G. humilis, a Carribean species with small oval-shaped leaves, despite actually having very long lanceolate leaves and being exclusively found in the Andean foothills of Bolivia. Also, multiple frequently cultivated species like Luc's garcinia and Russell's sweet garcinia haven't actually been described yet, despite for example the former having a decent amount of scientific interest and frequent genetic testing done on it.

All of these odd classification things and even more others have been pretty well known in my circles for the past 15 years-ish, but still nobody seems anywhere close to a conclusion for them. How long does it usually take for a genus to get organized when it has as many species as Garcinia does? And how do they do it? Do they go around testing every single species or only a few at a time? If a species is currently not named, do the same people usually describe them as part this endeavor, or just leave them for somebody else? I saw Plinia and Artocarpus recently got reshuffled a lot because of some prominent genetic studies on them, and several new species and even genera were added, but it just seems alien to me how stuff like that even ends up happening. There are so many plants out there!

Sorry if I'm asking the wrong person here, but I've been wondering about how this stuff will eventually be resolved for yeeeearrs

There are so many plants out there!

ok im kind of surprised i can offer a few possible answers to this question despite having never heard of this but i think i can. if the question is 'why aren't some plants actually described', this is the primary reason why.

when i was in plant anatomy class in college, the person teaching us was a plant anatomist who assigned us different plants from the greenhouse to dissect and describe in a paper for her, and she told us that we might find something that hadn't been described before, which was pretty shocking to me. what do you mean i could potentially find a new-to-science thing? has nobody in history looked at this plant that's just growing in the greenhouse upstairs??

what she said was that no, sometimes not. there are so many plants out there that it's difficult to do one exact in-depth description and published examination of each species, so what botanists end up doing is doing or finding one in-depth examination of one species in a specific group and assuming that all the others in the group are at least similar, if not the same. which is good because it saves time and works as a shorthand, especially if there's not much funding, but also sometimes it has the potential to overlook more nuanced differences that can go undiscovered for a long time. but that's just botanical species in the conventional sense, which i don't think is as straightforward in what you're describing.

another answer to this question that's more specific to the species you're talking about here is that plants are having sex. they have so so so soooo much sex. few things they enjoy more to be honest. and given that the most conventional (but not only) definition for different species is 'can't have sex with other species because it's too different from them', the lines get blurrier to deal with, and one thing botanists do when the lines between species get too blurry (because of all the sex) is to just assume that they're all part of some kind of hard-to-describe genetic soup with individual plants falling along gradients or spectrums of similarities or differences, and in this case you'll see botanists just name the most prominent species among them and call it the '[most common suspect] complex', which groups together all the ones that happen to be having sex with each other at the same time, just to make them easier to talk about. this typically doesn't mean that they're species-less, but more that they can be thought of as a group with a few distinct points where they can look very distinct, and those points are the species, if that makes sense; see the citrus sex graph at the end for an example.

i also see from a cursory google search that people seem to be planting and eating these in a more widespread way, and people are talking about them on forums and stuff. this is one of the cases in botany where things get tricky, because a person looking for traits in a fruit that's having tons of sex might not actually be looking for the same things botanists are looking for when describing a species-- it might seem easiest to just find which species or few species are the tastiest and grow those, but if it's a genetic soup then all you can really do is do it the old fashioned way and breed individual plants for the traits you want. which, who knows, could end up being a hybrid between all of them.

case in point: again i am not completely up to date with the lore here but i found a forum thread where people were debating which species to plant and the consensus was just to plant multiple species at once, which is fine but is also really funny given that it DOES facilitate even more sex, thus blurring the lines even further and-- if the posters decide to plant the resulting seeds from the fruits-- will create even MORE hybrid plants of no discernible concrete species in the plant soup. the hybrid of a hybrid of a hybrid of a hybrid or whatnot. when does one stop calling it a hybrid between two species and start calling it 'the tree in grandma's backyard that's the tastiest of the berries i've tried'? that is the question, truly, one humanity has had for millennia in the search for the tastiest berry, and at that point it might just be easier to call it a variety or cultivar, which are horticultural terms for just that-- a distinct 'kind' among the same species that taste good subjectively and can be reliably rebred and harvested, like all the apple varieties people debate about.

another reason is that plant phylogenies are hard and brain-twisting and plant taxonomists and systemisists are among our strongest warriors. it's not uncommon at all in botany to be researching something and to find out it's been reshuffled because of a new breakthrough on the case a bunch of people more qualified on the subject decided made more sense like a decades later. sometimes species themselves will even change names multiple times if it turns out that it was described earlier by someone else considering the new circumstances. if you're a really unlucky or just controversial plant all this can happen over and over again until, finally, the trees of math have been resolved in a way that makes sense. how long will it take? surely there is a concrete end to the madness? nah. lol

finally, if you're looking into studies on this, you should know that some phylogeny stuff is opinion-based or subjective, especially at first. what counts as a new group for one group of researchers might not count as one for another. so when you see stuff where people are inventing new categorizations or genuses or whatnot or merging multiple ones together spontaneously, it'll depend on how well supported their reasoning is and what the evidence seems to show, and the larger community of plant taxonomists will, overtime, decide what they want to do with that information-- which may include verifying it or refuting it with more evidence. what researchers are proposing when they split stuff off or merge it together is a new or updated model for thinking about existing information, and that model may be more or less useful than the existing one for the means of actually learning more about the plants.

anyway in short there are lots of reasons why this might not be sorted out and the more sex these plants have the longer it's gonna take. i'm strongly reminded of that one citrus sex graph (its this one) (screenshotted to see it on night mode):

[thagomizersshow]

I love when sci-fi/fantasy writers throw in a random fact about a fictional species that actually has big repercussions for that species' biology.

Like, there is a species in Star Trek called Saurians who are adorable dinosauroid looking dudes. They've had very little revealed about them despite having been mentioned as early as the original series by way of "Saurian brandy" — a drink that is so strong it can put a Klingon on their ass in one swig.

Other than that, most of what we know about them comes from snippets involving a reoccuring character on Discovery named Linus, who is mostly a comic relief character. Now the reason I bring them up is that in one episode there's a scene where Linus is eating bamboo of all things, and I'm not sure the writers realized how telling this is about Saurian biology.

Bamboo is a damn hard food to eat, and us humans can only eat the shoots of a few species. Even then, raw consumption of shoots can lead to cyanide poisoning if you aren't careful. We still don't know how exactly a lot of animals that eat a lot of bamboo (bamboo lemurs, red pandas, bamboo rats, elephants, gorillas) are able to digest so much of it without getting cyanide poisoning. There is some sort of neutralization process in giant pandas involving the rhodanese enzyme that turns cyanide into the non-toxic thiocyanate that they just pee out, but the process is still poorly understood in other species.

Bamboo is also hard to digest for the same reason all grasses are; their plant wall cellulose is hard as hell to break down. Like, your choices are:

a) you do a poor job of digesting it and just spend all day eating (giant panda, red panda, bamboo lemur)

b) you grow really big and have a big gut (elephants, gorillas)

c) you only eat the parts of the plant that are easier to digest (bamboo rats)

On top of that, bamboo is loaded with silica phytoliths that are like microscopic bits of glass. These evolved to make their tissues even harder to chew and metabolize.

It's hard to make out in the scene, but it looks like Linus is eating raw bamboo leaves. Just picking them up with his fingers and munching on them like it's nothing. That means his teeth and/or jaws would need to be very powerful (maybe hypsodont? or maybe tooth batteries?) AND, because he's eating it raw, he'd have to be immune to the cyanide in some way.

One explanation could be in the Star Trek Adventures TTRPG, where Saurians are said to have an ability called "Enhanced Metabolism" where they recover from toxins faster than other species (my guess is this was meant to reference their brandy being so strong). BUT, that's not the same thing as the immunity real bamboo eating animals seem to have. My head canon is that Saurians have a diet similar to red pandas, where bamboo-like plants are their main diet on their homeworld, but they'll eat other stuff too when it's available, AND they've evolved some way to convert cyanide into a harmless chemical they excrete, like a giant panda.

All of these whacky biology shenanigans stem (hehe) from the casual writing decision to make a supporting alien character seem weird by eating a weird thing.

[iamespecter]

Oh yeah, I have another AU and just like the Harlequin AU, it's a huge one

For the uninitiated, Origins AU is a slice of life + action adventure comedy centered around the Glamrock cast, as they try to get by starting their own band and maybe, kicking ass. No, Security Breach & Ruin isn't canon to this AU, its it's own world (though SB characters can show up as a minor cast).

I'm pretty sure the reason this au started was because I saw the baby Monty decal from Gator golf and thought, "Why is Monty the only one with this? The others should also have their origins too" (hence the name)

These are all SUPER old art btw, from all the way back to 2022

One thing led to another, and with the joint effort with my bf @nobody-nexus, Origins AU began with baby decal concepts, to fleshed out world(s), backstories and lore.

Lots, and LOTS of em. But for the sake of not boring anyone with details, I'll summarize.

Freddy is an Alien space bear Supersoldier called an "Ursin'ul" (play on words on "ursine" and "arsenal") crash landing on earth, refusing to participate in propaganda and colonizing other planets once he found out the truth about his kind

Chica is a rebellious yet naive meravian Princess who learns forbidden knowledge to be able to walk on land and explore the world beyond the sea, as long as she keeps hydrating

Roxy is the bad girl small-time rockstar that's closed off to most people due to her upbringing, and transforms into a werewolf when full moon hits

Monty is a 9-foot tall irradiated alligator being pursued by the government after he broke out, whom wants to study him in order to create potential bio-weaponized supersoldiers

And Bonnie is... Roxy's roommate getting caught in the crossfire. A normal guy with a lot of uncles (almost ALL Bonnies from the entire franchise are related to him), and owns a bowling alley. That's it lmao, he doesn't have a secret or a superpower like everyone, he's just the average menkisser

They're always pursued by The Rockstars in this AU, all with personal motives behind their actions: Francois being forced to find and retrieve Freddy by Levi's (Lefty) orders, Clarabelle wants revenge for her eye from Roxy, Felix is down horrendous for Chica and wants to marry her against her will, and Brian is tasked with retrieving Monty.

Other variants in the franchise have their own thing too lmao, HW dlc being weird country guys, Toys being a Mafia group/Toymakers with an ongoing feud with the Funtimes, Withereds/Classics being veterans in the ent. industry, and Fury's Rage enemies aren't enemies, but Monty's friends from his time in confinement. There's Nightmares too, but they aren't a thing until the end.

I've made lots of shitposts, artworks and designs alongside Nexus for this au, and one day, I wanna come back to it and work on tweaking stuff as well as story beats. For now, I got a lot of things I have to work on first and this serves as an archive for the au's ideas.

[not-so-plus-ultra]

Okay, maybe unpopular opinion time, but I started watching DanDaDan (ADORE it so far) and some of you are starting to become the meme of "that one friend who is too woke" about what happens in the first episode

TW for sexual assault + CW light DanDaDan spoilers if you haven't watched it yet. Its gonna be a bit ranty

First of all I wanna preface this with saying that, if Momo's scene with the aliens impacted you and / or you found it triggering, that's extremely valid. I am not claiming it isn't, specially for people who have any kind of sexual trauma. What I'm gonna say is not about that

What I mean is; I think we have gotten so used to a very big number of anime using sexual assault as a "funny" gag, having characters violate other characters' physical boundaries, or having a token perverted / incestuous / p*do character, all in the name of terrible "comedy" or fanservice, that we have started bracing up for any mention or showcase of sexual assault to be treated as a gag or as a "sexy" thing; specially when it comes to female characters, because sadly they're the victims of this 99% of the time. This, without going over the sexualization of characters in general, even when mundane things are happening

It's a sentiment I understand and share. I hate all of these tropes and "jokes" and it makes me really sad when a series I otherwise like has to include something like that. I actively criticize these kinds of things no matter how big a fan I am of a work in question

However, I think because of all this, we have forgotten that media can choose to use scenarios like that as an actual Bad thing to show. A bad and unfortunate thing that happens to a character that isn't used as comedy or as fanservice

I had heard about the sexual assault scene in DanDaDan prior to watching it, and I had decided I was gonna skip that scene, as I am someone who is both disgusted by these things and has trauma related to them. However while skipping quickly through the scene I thought it didn't look as bad as I was bracing for, so I decided it was something I could stomach. I was really surprised when I saw that the scene was strictly being handled as a bad thing happening to Momo, and that it also ultimately ended up with her escaping her assaulters before anything truly scarring happens

No jokes about the situation per se, no compromising shots other than the fact that she was in her underwear - and regarding that, the fact that she was built like a normal girl, her proportions and physical features weren't presented in any objectifying or exaggerated way, and through the whole scene she was fighting against it and being uncomfortable instead of submitting to the situation or being made to blush and get flustered about it like you can Disgracefully see in many other instances of other shows

DanDaDan is ultimately a horror / paranormal series. It's not as dark as others and it seems it doesn't pretend to be, but bad things are bound to happen. I think that, as long as you do it tastefully, almost any subject can be used for those bad things. Sexual stuff is sadly EXTREMELY misused in anime, and tbh in media in general, but I don't think it has to be a taboo thing to have your characters go through as long as youre not being weird about it

Furthermore, I think it's pretty clear that, at least the parts that have been adapted of this manga so far (I am not a manga reader btw, I have only seen the 5 anime episodes that are currently out, so if the manga later proves me defending it wrong, I'm sorry, and I'd like to hear it), are in part talking about bodily autonomy

Our mcs BOTH get assaulted, but nobody online ever pays attention to Okarun losing his genitals as him also having been assaulted simply because it's presented in a more unrealistic way. His initial motivation in the series is to retrieve his genitals, and even when he seems to have gotten them back the first time, something is still wrong (another part missing) and he can't just go about his life normally again as if nothing had happened, which I think is a clear metaphor of a victim's feelings after having been assaulted; and what is more, our first arc ends with the revelation that the ghost who did that to him seems to have done it to protect the place she's bound to, a tunnel, from men, for we get told that many girls have gotten sexually assaulted, killed and dismembered in it

About Okarun, I DO get that his situation is shown in a bit of a silly light because haha penis, but I am also afraid that people would have reacted a lot more if he was a girl losing his genitals instead even if it was painted in the same light. Both Momo and Okarun got out of the situation fighting, both of them were brave and as nonchalant as they could to their assaulters, but it's only Momo's situation which gets treated as the bad one. Both get terrible things done to them ! And both of them are being shown as bad things !

None of this means you personally can't be uncomfortable with any of the mentioned scene; after all, they're portraying something horrible that happens in real life. And again, I get that in Momo's case, although unrealistic elements are involved, the situation she's put in can look closer to a real life assault, and thus, it can be more triggering. But the fact is that the sexual assault of both characters is being used to showcase a terrible thing, it's not there just for a gag or for people to put their eyes on the characters' bodies, and I personally just think it's silly when I see people lump in the situations in DanDaDan with series like Undead Unluck, when the former is portraying assault as not only a genuinely bad situation but also as part of the many points I think the first act of the series makes about bodily autonomy, and the later uses it as a reocurring "funny" gag (I have seen people say it gets better later, but still, it's still used as a gag at some point)

This is brought to you by me seeing people on Twitter compare DanDaDan's assault scene to incestuous characters from other animes like Yuri from Spy x Family, Makoto from Saiki K., and Lance from Mashle. I am a big fan of two of those three series and let me tell you: those characters can fuck themselves, I don't find haha incest jokes funny or necessary in any piece of media

[somerandomdudelmao]

so I often think about the concept of good and evil, and how it’s so human. How it fits the majority’s mentality and morality. And I just think it fits so well with Ecliptica and the other aliens on their ship (forgive me I forgot what their alien name). Cause the thing is, they aren’t human. They’re aliens from another planet. For all we know they might have different organs and stuff too. Who’s to say their morals are the same as ours? I feel like Oscar kind of figured this out in his own weird way, kind of just a quick “uh oh” moment for him. But the concept of good and evil is a human construct. Not alien. It’s obvious and shows just beautifully in your comic. the lack of empathy towards other races, the toying with their prey and feeling just because they can? They don’t see that as a problem. They don’t see that as bad. They see that as another day on the ship, they see that as having a fun hunting trip. They see that as a regular boring day where they do what they usually do. They don’t think they’re the bad guys and it shows. They are creatures with a big ego, deciding they are a superior race, and they think that’s all a good thing. And god it’s so cool. in fact, I bet they have their own versions of good and bad, which is actually so cool because what is their society really like?? What are common things they do? How many planets have they devistated without a single care?

anyway your comic is literally so cool and uh. Sorry for the rant lol

Oh my gosh, I absolutely love this ask. Thank you mcnfjfj. I have a little separate plot planned about the Marmor culture and their idea of right and wrong, evil and good. A little episode about their home planet and society.

[chiiroptereh]

[Please zoom in, there's a lot of detail! And a massive file size...ouch]

Hi guys, long time no post! Been working on Art Fight and life stuff, but I've got something kinda fun for you.

This is a compilation exploring how a mortal Bill may interact with our world if there were still some kinda Euclidean instincts buried in there. Y'know, before the Book of Bill ruins all my headcanons >:P (EDIT: IT HAS BEEN READ. YAHOOOOOO)

Also quite an experimental piece as you can probably tell. Lots of details on both said headcanons and the art stuff under the cut, but I invite you to study the colorful texture yourself beforehand and think about what it might be representative of, just for fun because I got some really cool answers from my friends when asked :]c

TL;DR: the headcanon is that Euclideans have exceptional eyes for geometry. They find things like symmetry, tessellating patterns, graphs and fractals very aesthetically pleasing. If pushed into our 3D world, they feel comforted by the familiarity flat objects/spaces bring, as well as high-contrast patterns. Shadows especially are a familiar dimensional reduction that may bring them much comfort.

Bill would surely not be happy about these inclinations, constant reminders of a past long gone, but I'm not sure he's even aware of them here :P I think his ego gets in the way to the point where he just views these interests as common sense, which, of course, us lame humans just don't understand because we aren't nearly as cool as him. Of course he likes perfectly symmetrical leaves and staring at the kitchen floor, it's called taste, look it up!

And yet, he can't seem to shake the strange sense of melancholy he gets from viewing his own shadow.

~ End of TL;DR, long version below! ~

🔺 Headcanon Development

So, the catalyst of this idea was in relation to my friend and I's AU ( @love-triangles-au ). TL;DR, Bill's brought back mortal, meets another triangle named Y.V. (it's his hand holding the paper in the piece, actually), at some point they fall in yaois together, you know how it is. And, in writing a pair of triangles (or, more broadly, writing from the perspective of a different species), something I've had to consider was that you really can't get much further removed from a human being than sentient geometry.

The anatomical aspect was mostly figured out (see my piece on Bill's eye-mouth), but I wanted to consider what psychological differences might be at play. I wanted them to be weirder, more alien, double-so for Bill. At first I explored these possibilities through the lens of Bill and Y.V.'s relationship, specifically the question "what might a triangle find appealing about another triangle?"

Well, really the only things that came to mind were straight lines and symmetry, anything related to the geometric form of such a creature. That's more-or-less where that ended until the thought struck me that there's no reason this aesthetic appreciation couldn't extend to the rest of the environment, and then further when I realized, "wait, this is a species that is designed to live in a 2D environment. Like, they should seriously be really weird. I need to push this like 200% more."

So...yeah! I did some thinking and brainstorming with others and came up with a pretty long list of things a Euclidean in our world may be inclined to enjoy or find some level of comfort in. It's worth noting again that in this piece specifically this is a mortal/powerless Bill, so he can't really escape this Earthly environment. IF he's aware of these instincts at all (and that's a big "if"; when have you last been cognizant of your own instincts let alone known where they were stemming from?) I think he'd have snuffed them out in immortality and/or purposefully gone against them; he doesn't take kindly to being told what to do.

In order from left-to-right, top-to-bottom, here's an explanation for each!:

Flat objects such as paper are something he may find particularly engaging. It's basically 2D!

Tessellations are especially fascinating, and our world has them everywhere in the form of tile floors. Symmetry and such a predictable pattern...as the infinity of the starry sky might for us, the infinite potential of tessellations might invoke a similar sense of awe in him. Add on the maximum contrast of black on white kitchen tiles and the forms are only even better defined! A sensitivity to contrast would be very helpful for a 2D being navigating their environment.

Fields are flat and open, much like Euclydia itself. Laying flat may make him feel a little more at home.

More tessellation in the honeycomb of hymenopterans (bees, wasps and friends)! It helps that pain is hilarious.

The city is an absolute treasure trove. Rectangular buildings, precise architecture, square sidewalks and straight lines abound...he may as well be looking at a rainbow or an art gallery! I think a Euclidean's brain is very fine-tuned to mathematics, especially in regards to trigonometry. What may appear to be a straight painting might appear obnoxiously crooked to him.

Zebras are high-contrast :]

Another flat surface, another relaxing space <3

I think graphs are about as high as high art gets to most Euclideans.

I've touched on shadows before, and for good reason; truly they must be something borderline magical to the Euclidean and perhaps bitterly nostalgic.

This one kinda speaks for itself. Dweeb.

🎨 The Artsy Stuff

Lately I've been trying to find ways to fit more color into my work, as color is perhaps one of my favorite things in the world. My wardrobe is rather garish; my dad jokes that you could see me from space. My fursona is obnoxiously bright for a reason -- I feel my soul is a very colorful one!

I also realized recently that I don't actually know the exact style that speaks to me. I could talk about the phenomenon of the "style crisis" that many artists have all day, but in my mind the best cure for this feeling is to go against it entirely and begin stealing as much as possible.

So, I've tried to keep an eye out for more sources of inspiration everywhere I go, physical and digital. I've tried to train my mind into making a habit of considering, "can I do anything with this?" everywhere I go, and it recently paid off!

The glittery rainbowy texture you see plastered all over Billiam is this one, a photo-manipulated set of fruit stickers. I must confess I've been obsessed with this image for the past 72 hours, and this seemed like a good excuse to try it out!

I worried throughout the process if it might be so abstract that it loops back around to being horribly deliberate, if that makes sense -- like each sparkle was not a piece of a whole but rather an object in itself -- but it seems like that hasn't been a problem, so I'm grateful for that :Dc

I hope it can dazzle and delight you as it does me, but as long as you find it fascinating at the very least then I consider it a success! I really enjoyed hearing my friends' interpretations while workshopping it, and got tons of amazing answers from opal to kaleidoscope to fossilized bone marrow! I truly believe that the best art has some room for interpretation and it really excites me to be surrounded by that kind of creative energy that follows said pieces. That definitely adds to my pride in this work. It's weird, it's colorful, it's detailed and yet ambiguous. I'm feeling pretty autistic about it

Alright, I think that's about it. Thanks for listening!