#alfred taught bruce to sew

[syresdcthings]

Just imagining my favs sitting down and making their own little outfits. Like Twoface making that little suit with the different colours... there's no fucking way he bought that from a designer he sat down and stitched it together piece by piece. Joker making all his fits DIY because he can't just trust some shaky handed lady to cater to his style perfectly even with a gun to her head.

(Bonus: that page with Robin!Dick drawing his hero costume except its him drawing Discowing and thinking "Yeah this is fine")

[hellfiredarling]

Been having thoughts about the Batfams different hobbies and I can't stop thinking about cozy rainy afternoons in the manor with everyone sitting around doing their own lil crafts/hobbies I feel like Jason crochets and/or knits (Babs taught him how to knit). And he's really good at sewing and can do pretty intricate embroidery. He and Alfred used to/sometimes still do sit around and mend clothes/costumes and talk about their lives and whatever else. Damian obviously likes to draw and paint. Sometimes Duke will join him (not because he's particularly amazing at it but because he enjoys just chilling). Tim is a sucker for puzzles of all kinds and I think that speaks for itself. Sometimes Dick or Bruce will pop in and help him unprompted (Tim pretends to be mad about it) Cass, Babs and Steph will sit around for HOURS doing those really intricate coloring books and they'll shade and highlight and everything. The table is completely covered with colored pencils, crayons, gel pens, you name it.

[moider-time]

Model Bruce AU

As a kid, Bruce always enjoyed dressing up in Thomas and Martha's clothes. They taught him that clothing isn't specific to a gender so if he wants to wear suits or skirts, tights or trousers, it's all ok. Martha would love taking him shopping and trying on clothes.

One of his fondest memories is of the three of them dressed up as the Three Good Fairies from Sleeping Beauty for a Halloween charity gala. After they died, he framed all of their outfits and hung them up in his study.

He meets Selina in college. He wants to be a doctor and she wants to be a vet. She also has a hobby of sewing and making clothes and he got suckered into being her mannequin. Harley helped with the suckering. To this day, Harley says she got him his first gig cause she introduced the two of them. Bruce never denies it.

The first time he models is for a university fashion show. The winner gets 5 thousand dollars donated to a charity of their choosing and as Selina says "the kitties need their money". It takes a lot of convincing though. Trying on her clothes is one thing but walking a runway? Yeah that's totally different and Bruce definitely panics a little about that. Harley, Bruce and Selina have a whole Model Bootcamp which is basically trying on heels and watching America's Next Top Model.

The theme is 'Red Carpet After-party' and so Selina dresses him in a two piece, floor length dress with a navy lace top and a navy skirt with gold sequins and strappy gold heels. Also gold hair tips and a shimmery navy eye shadow, and his nails match his skirt. (Idk if y'all can tell but I suck at describing clothes)

To cut a long story short, they demolish at that fashion show. Bruce, after a pep talk from Harley and Selina while Harvey was standing there drooling, makes that runway his bitch. He walks like a hooker trying to make her quota. If he wasn't the campus hottie before, he is now. He and Selina eventually go their separate ways but they always look back on that day fondly.

And he gets a lot of offers from big time modelling agencies. They say all the things like he has "potential" and they wanna turn him into "a star" but, while he found it fun, he kinda just wants to do something small. He chooses a small cologne brand that Alfred likes. Alfred tears up at this which makes Bruce tear up and well they're both messes.

They dress him in a smart suit with deep purple eyeshadow to match the bottle of the cologne. His nails get a silver coat like the cover of the bottle. That cologne ad gets so much attention that the business nearly runs out of bottles.

He gets asked if this modelling thing is just a phase, he gets shamed for his clothing and makeup and he generally just gets badgered. He replies the same to all of them "I like doing it so I'm gonna do it"

He kind of a jack of all trades. He models clothes, colognes and perfume, jewellery, shoes, nail polish,(lingerie 😏), he's even appeared in ads for games and toys. He once got all dolled up only to play with Lego but it was so much fun.

Not that Bruce never walks the runway again. He does it for charity, whenever Harley blackmails him into doing it and whenever he feels like. He took Harley with him to every fashion week cause he goes nowhere without his makeup artist.

Nobody could ever connect Batman and Bruce Wayne because while Bruce is a bit shy, he's very graceful while there are too many YouTube compilations of Batman tripping over himself or walking into things.

( @bruciemilf )

[gffa]

Currently chewing drywall over Nightwing #109 because of the explicit parallel of Dick Grayson's fears--the fear of heights, of falling after someone he loves, someone he feels he let down, people who did die and someone who will die if he doesn't fall that impossible height, paralleled to the fear that Bruce's life will depend on him if he doesn't know how to sew up stitches, that if he doesn't keep his focus, if he doesn't move through the fear, people he loves will die. The things that his parents and Alfred taught him, the things that his dead parents taught him, John, Mary, and Alfred are all gone from the world now, but what they taught him allows him to save other people that he loves, if he can get past the terrifying fear gnawing at the edges of his mind that they might die, and I'm going to lose it a little. That Dick Grayson keeps being asked to overcome not just regular frightening things, but the kind that slice you to the bone--jump off a ledge that was high enough to kill your parents or she dies, learn to sew up stitches while someone is dying or your second father will possibly die, all the traumas that hammered into Dick's bones when he was still just a child, he's being asked to leap over them because people he loves will die if he doesn't. He can one day save Bruce's life, save Bea's life, if he gets over the fear of learning how to sew up dying loved ones. It's about how little room there is for self-doubt and questioning his own worth, despite that those fears are still there, they just get compressed and compressed until one day they're going to explode, because Dick Grayson cares so deeply for others, he loves so deeply that he can move mountains, and people trust him because he made of so much love and life and light, but eventually he's still mortal and there won't be enough of him left to buffer out the fear and he'll crack.

[why-rock-look-tasty-if-no-eat]

My older sibling and I have grown up speaking one full language, and fragments of like. Four different languages (two because of white washing, one from fear of community anger during WWII, another because we randomly had a foreign TV channel) so we'd just use them all at once no matter the place or time.

We'd butcher the syntax and grammar to fit our agendas of slander to the point that we were tripping over English, our second language. It got to the point that when I was talking to a friend in middle school I asked, "We AM go?" which was supposed to be, "Are we going to AM?" (AM is just a study room that was an on and off thing at school).

So I guarantee you that the batkids will have the same problem. I can see them just blanking on whatever they were going to say while on a talk show. However their civilian persona doesn't know that language they know the word in. Now they have to badly explain what word they're thinking of in English. The batkids are laughing their asses off and yelling out the word in English to mock their fallen sibling.

Dick doesn't have this problem though. He's lucked out that it's public knowledge that he's a polyglot and now he can trash talk them in different languages, publicly, and they can't even react to it.

I do think though that the batfam would absolutely throw cultural heritage galas and wear their traditional garb and only speak in the language of their heritage.

Bruce teaching Hebrew to the kids who come up to him (he's genuinely smiling because he gets to share the culture that his parents taught him)

Dick is sharing the history of the Romani and explains the differences between Romanian and Romani (does anyone know which Roma branch he's in? Dick does a Flamenco dance that Jason joins in on, sharing Romani stories and phrases)

Cass makes tea and coffee for those who ask for a drink, because both are popular in Hong Kong (I'm going with Cass not knowing much about her heritage but because of her time in HK she wants to show off the island nation that wormed it's way into her heart.)

Jason embraces his Latino upbringing that he hid to pass as white and goes all out (Loudly yelling, having a blast talking to people, dancing and singing, drinking with his family, wearing the bright colors that he totally never would normally wear.)

Tim absolutely gets into the finest detail and spent multiple nights researching everything on his heritage (give my boy a concrete race please, but I like to hc as French. Tim would bring only the finest of French cuisine to force the people he hates to eat it because France is still a culture, even if it's seen as 'generic' nowadays)

Duke would try to have samples of food and facts from every tribe in Africa (he also totally has toys he made himself to give to the kids, and spent early morning hours with Alfred learning how to plate foods simply because of how many he wants to make and display)

Damian also has a tea and coffee set up, with snacks that Alfred definitely didn't have help making (he makes the public brew it themselves 'so that they may put their brains to use for once and be grateful that I taught them how to enjoy the superior tastes of my people')

If they manage to get Alfred to join them, he'd ask Jason if the boy has any ideas of which era of Britain to go with (Damian draws out a custom suit for Alfred, Dick hand embroiders him a handkerchief and neckerchief pair, Tim does quality control on the fabrics and shoes, Duke keeps Alfred off their backs, and Bruce got bullied into making the calls all of the people needed to get the fabric/sewing items/shoes/and services needed)

I love how most of the batkids are fluent in multiple languages.

Think about all the fun.

Them talking five different languages in two sentences and everybody understanding it without problem.

Calling each other insults in a language they know the other person doesn't speak.

They have a conversation in a language that has informal and formal 'you' and they are addressing each other with the formal 'you' because they know it annoys the other person

[karlyanalora]

There’s no medic to call for when you’re a spy. You just had to do it yourself. Alfred bit down on his jacket and yanked his shoulder back into place with a sickening pop and blinding agony. He took a deep breath, rolled his shoulders, plastered a smile on his face, and waltzed back into the lion’s den.

----------------------

Bruce learned to bandage his own bloody knuckles at the tender age of eight and a half. Alfred wouldn’t let him get them in training, but Bruce sure got them picking fights at school. His tolerance for bullies had vanished with the death of his parents, especially when the older boys picked on young Molly Jenkins. She’d never been the same since her best friend was killed in front of her during a mugging last year. She was skittish now, jumping at any sound that mildly resembled a gunshot, and was prone to tears. The boys thought it was funny; Bruce did not and he cut his knuckles on their teeth.

After the fifth fight, the nurse stopped tending to him first. He had to admit he had the poor woman overwhelmed today. So he found the bandages and did his best to apply them himself. They stuck to the scabs and at home Alfred had to tear them off, though the process was made a bit easier with the use of salt water. He then taught Bruce how to do it properly next time and decided to tutor him at home.

--------------------------------------

Falling off the R-Cycle was not fun and when you didn’t wear pants meant a bad case of road rash. But Alfred was always there to treat it. But that wasn’t the case anymore, was it? Falling off a motorcycle as Nightwing meant a much more manageable road rash that could be easily treated at his apartment, but Dick could still feel tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. It made him homesick, yet another reminder that he was alone as he picked the rocks out of his skin.

--------------------------------------

Giving yourself stitches was almost a rite of passage in the Batfamily. It’s an important skill, almost second nature, and for some whacked-up reason, Jason finds it soothing. Maybe it’s because in the back of his mind he can hear Bruce’s deep voice walking him through the steps and Alfred’s “Well done, Master Jason” when he ties the knot. Or maybe it’s the fact is that if all it takes is stitches, the wound can’t be that bad. Most of the time Jason just handles it out in the field and goes on with the rest of his day.

That hadn’t been the case when he first became Robin. He’d been much more fond of the superglue method, content to stay as far away from needles as he could. But Alfred had placed a grounding hand on his shoulder as Bruce stitched up his gashed leg, gently explaining everything he was doing.

According to Dick, that Bruce had died with Jason. The light of gentleness had gone out and he had never returned to the man who was good with kids and called you “chum” and “lad.” Just another reason Jason was a mistake and his coming home wouldn’t fix that.

And yet Batman still wouldn’t kill the Joker.

Jason cut the thread with his teeth and went back to work.

--------------------------------

Tim had the Mayo Clinic pulled up on his computer and his poor blistered feet sprawled out in front of him. He’d washed his hands and feet already. He’d nabbed one of his mother’s sewing needles, which was probably an antique since she didn’t sew, and cleaned it with rubbing alcohol. He swabbed the blister with rubbing alcohol as well since their first aid kit didn’t have any iodine. He winced as he pricked the blister near the edge and watched as the liquid oozed out. Already it felt better. He put on some Vaseline and covered it with a bandaid before moving on to the next one. He had school in the morning and he didn’t want his parents to ask why he was limping. If they even noticed.

--------------------------------------------

Cass washed her arm in the river before wrapping an old shirt around it. She’d gotten caught on some barbed wire while out scavenging for food. She would need to find some soap to keep it clean or some of the other things her father had used to treat her training wounds. But this would have to do for now. The air was growing colder every day; wounds she knew how to treat, but how to survive on her own was something new. Her stomach growled as she pulled the knotted sleeves tight and set out once more.

-----------------------------------------

Steph hissed as she gently prodded the giant goose egg that was forming on the side of her head. Stupid Dad. Stupid Steph too; she should have known he was in a bad mood. And with Mom out of commission at the moment, Steph was on her own. She popped down a couple of Ibuprofen and waited for Dad and his “friends” to clear out so she could grab a bag of frozen peas. For now, she wondered how to cover up her newfound lump in time for school tomorrow. Makeup for the bruising and a hat maybe?

-----------------------------------------

Damian had always tended to all his own wounds. Supplies and demonstrations were provided, but that was all. But this scratch, a mere skinned knee, was nothing.

“Grayson, this is ridiculous.”

“I repeat: do you want a Superman, Wonder Woman, or Flash band-aid?”

“I can handle this myself.”

“Yeah, but being part of a family means you don’t have to.”

[coffee-latte-sprite]

Damian al Ghul and The Annoying Reporter

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Chapter 2

Agedup!Damian al Ghul x fem!reader

Warnings: violence, talk of death

WC: 1,200

Synopsis:

Wanting to make a name for herself, Y/N does the unthinkable and tries to interview the heir to the League of Assassins. Although, it doesn’t go as planned. How will she be able to salvage this, especially when Damian Al Ghul doesn’t like strangers.

The older man sat upon his throne as his grandson stood before him. Both draped in the most expensive silk robes the world had to offer. Golden ribbons sew into the forest green clothing as it draped around their solid frames.

Both wore a scowl as the air was tense.

The grandson held the hilt of his sheathed katana harder.

“Grandfather, if-” Damian, the 22-year-old man began.

His mother’s father put up his hand to silence Damian, “No, and you are dismissed.”

Damian clenched his jaw as the rise of anger is willing to combust within him.

But, he knew better than to go against Ra al Ghul. Even with the family relation, his grandfather is not soft towards him.

Damian bowed his tall form and stood back up and walked out.

The only sound left in the room was his fading steps towards his quarters.

===

He slammed his door as walked further into his room.

“I-I,” he kicked a nearby plant, he yelled out in anger, “I can’t with him!”

He cried out as he collapsed back on his king-sized bed. He’s had the same room since he was born into this hellish place.

Ever since he was born, he’s had more responsibilities and expectations put on him than a president. And even with a president, they wouldn’t endanger his life every day.

The room was larger than life and filled with nothing.

He was taught young, to not have an attachment to things, it was a weakness to have.

But deep down, Damian always wanted to be his own person. And he proved this when he was fifteen years old.

He was hiking by himself in the mountains when he found something. And soon, grew an attachment.

What is this thing you ask? Well, it is now currently trotting towards Damian.

“Titus, I’m fine,” Damian said as he sat up and looked at the black Great Dane. Titus sat as he peered at Damian.

Titus has been a very loyal dog and listened very closely to anything Damian said.

When Damian brought him to the league, he lied and said that Titus was with him to help him train more.

No one questioned it.

Although, when Damian was seventeen, he adopted another friend, a cat. Which he called Alfred for some reason. Alfred was a very. . . judgemental cat, which made Damian love him more.

Damian had the excuse that Titus would not help him train well unless he had a companion.

No one questioned it.

When Damian was eighteen, he was on a mission in southern Asia, it is where he met yet another friend, Jerry. Jerry was a very special friend, but the friendship did not last because Damian had to leave. Damian wanted to bring Jerry home, but he was worried that Jerry wouldn’t pass the al Ghul test of sustainability. Thus making Damain have a lasting hug with a turkey named Jerry.

Lastly, when Damain was nineteen, he met another friend. A cow.

Damian fell in love with this cow immediately and named the cow, Bat-cow, a joke to his biological father, Bruce Wayne.

Each of his friends were stationed in his room and made sure to not make any noise, they were scared of what would happen to them and Damian.

Damian slide off the bed and onto the floor as he softly petted Titus’ head and as Alfred curled up beside Damian’s muscular leg.

The small black cat purred as Damian ran his fingers through his silky fur.

Bat-cow remained seated by the window since she was too big to walk around. Damian understood, and he also wished he could just lay around for hours too.

Damian’s stress slowly started to fade as his pets were calming him.

The reason for Damian’s distress was because he and his grandfather were in talks about how Damian will soon inherit the league, and how his grandfather will soon leave this world. Once and for all.

Damain loved his grandfather and didn’t want him to leave this world. He’s - sadly enough- grew an attachment to his grandfather.

“Do you think I am ready?” Damian asked his friends. The question had been dwelling in Damian’s mind for hours, and now he was finally able to voice it.

They bark, purr, and moo.

“Ah, thank you.” He said as he concentrated.

They didn’t think he was ready.

“What do you think will prepare me?”

They don’t respond.

The attitude of his friends truly was astonishing.

He softly smiled as he continued to pet their furs.

“You three are-” Damain stopped as he heard the faintest of sounds. The winds sounded as if they were being cut and getting beat against.

The sounds of motors grew louder as increasing anxiety ate away at the heir.

“Helicopters?” He asked in disbelief as he stood up abruptly. Alfred and Titus growled in protest.

His mind spiraled as he tried to find an answer.

Who would be up this high in the mountains?

Then, he heard shots. Rounds and rounds of ammunition were fired.

Damian’s mind cleared and jumped into action, “We have to move now!” Damain said as he grabbed Alfred. Titus and Bat-cow followed him out of the door.

Damian knew of a secret passage out of the league and out onto another mountain top, he had to get his friends to safety.

He pushed through officers who were running towards the fight. Damian paid no mind to their looks of surprise.

They knew better than to voice their thoughts.

Bat-cow and Titus were hot on his heels as he rounded another corner to a dead end.

He felt around for the lever to open the panel, then he felt it give. The door opened wide and Damain ushered his friends through, Alfred still in his arms.

They flew down the steps as Damian’s heartbeat was thick in his ears, his only goal was his pets.

Damain saw the dying sunlight near the end of the stairwell, hope reigniting in his chest.

Hooves, paws, and feet hit the ground as they started to run along the rock bridge, a deadly drop on either side.

“Okay, Titus, you’re in charge, lead them up to safety,” Damain said to his loyal companion as Titus nodded his head and turned running to the winding road up the mountain.

Damian’s mind settled as his friends were safe.

He breathed a sigh of relief as he turned back towards the fight, ready to defend his home.

===

Click. Click. Click.

Shot after shot was taken.

The owner readjusts as she brings up the camera to her eye level and continues to take pictures of the sight before her.

The League of Assassins is being gunned down by a man in a helicopter, five more seeming coming behind the first.

Y/N was in awe of the sight in front of her, this is it. The story of a lifetime. She was finally going to be able to make her mark.

Then, she sees half of the base be blown to pieces by a missile.

She gasps as she presses her finger down on the button to take more pictures.

She was far enough away that no flying debris would hit her, but she still cowered.

This was insane.

The headlines she was going to make with this.

As she brought up her camera again, she feels the light tap of metal by her neck.

“Who are you?” A deep voice asked behind the katana.

Tag list: @royalmuffinsworld

[the-astromeners-bakery]

How the Wayne’s reacted to meeting Cassandra’s girlfriend (Me) and also the gifts I brought them-

Bruce Wayne-

He was pretty nice. He told me that as long as I treated Cassandra right and made her happy, we would have no problems. He even asked Cass my allergies so he could plan the meals accordingly. It was hard to get a gift for a BILLIONAIRE, but he seemed to like the fruit basket-

Dick Grayson-

He was very excited. Apparently, I’ve been the first person to ever beat him at Star Wars trivia. He said he wanted to meet me in a week for a rematch. He really like the playing cards and chess set I got him.

Jason Todd-

Pretty chill. Asked we what I read and if I wrote. We had a long discussion about grammar and the best writing tactics. He offered to teach me Spanish. He appreciated the pack of rare novels I got him, and even offered to pay me for them. I said no but I still found 300$ in my Paypall.

Tim Drake-

He shared his coffee maker with me, so that’s a win. He asked me the stereotypical questions, how we met, how long we’ve been together, etc. He also said he’d been willing to help me if I’m struggling in anything. He said he’d out the coffee mixtures I got him to use, as well as the new laptop.

Stephanie Brown-

She gave me a semi-tour of the mansion, told me if I ever wanted to move in there was always room. She also admitted that she was the one who ordered that giant load from my shop just so I could have extra spending money, which made me glad I choose to see her some purple dresses.

Damian Wayne-

I knew he would be tough to please, so I brought a basket with all the kittens in it to hopefully a good impression. He didn’t say much to my face, just leaning down to pet them, but Cass told me I had his approval. I decided to take the risk and get him a peacock… I almost thought I saw a smile.

Duke Thomas-

Listen, this dude is a sweetheart. He ate the majority of the baked goods I gave him, and quietly asked if he could have more the next time I visited. He’s about Christie’s age I think, so I offered to tutor him in literature.

Harper and Cullen row-

I put these two together because they never left each other’s side. Harper was pretty open about it, while Cullen took a little convincing. They both liked the art supplies I gave them, and Harper asked if I wanted to meet again to draw with them.

Helena Wayne/Bertinellie-

Are they twins or something? No clue. I got them both gift cards because of last minute shopping- they still seem to like and respect me.

Luke Fox-

Also a sweetheart. Challenged me to a few rounds of basketball while asking me questions. I lost most of them, but it was good game. When I gave him a ball pump, he pat me in the back and thanked me.

Barbara Gordon-

Lovely woman. Said she’s ‘grateful that Cass is dating an empath’. How did that woman know?! Anyways, she loved the headphones and wheelchair bag, so that’s great.

Carrie Kelly-

Really energetic kid. Cass told me she wanted to get into sewing, so I bought her a beginners kit and taught her the basics. Safe to say, I might be her favorite non-sibling.

And of course..

Alfred Pennyworth-

Sweet old man. If anyones hurts him I will personally kill them. No one deserves him. I brought him some herbs I grew and he seemed to appreciate them. He called me “Young Master” as first. When I told him I wasn’t comfortable with that, he didn’t even blink before calling me “Young Lass” instead. Sweet old man.

Safe to say, I’m pretty much welcome back anytime. Apparently, there’s still some family I haven’t met that just couldn’t make it, but I’ll see them at what Mr. Wayne called “Introduction part 2”. I’m glad it all worked out fine.

[hummingbirdsalt]

Batfam as Borrowers

Because I'm always down to combine my favorite pieces of fiction with the concept of borrowers 😌 This'll just be a mess of ideas so... buckle up lol

Borrower!Bruce, like his canon counterpart, lost his parents at a young age.

There's no shortage of danger when you're only inches tall, and I kinda sway towards their death having something to do with a human. Not a deliberate act, but something unintentional and mundane, like rearranging furniture. The human doesn't even know such tiny people exist, let alone that they're in just the right spot to be crushed.

Bruce is traumatized, and left with an even greater fear of humans than his kind already has. Seeing the damage they can cause, even unintentionally, sticks with him.

Borrower!Alfred is here, too, 'cause I said so. He's been something of a neighbor, living in a different section of the house but visiting frequently. He takes Bruce under his wing after Thomas and Martha's death, and teaches him how to borrow.

The thing is, I want Bruce to be a loner for a while... we're certainly not gonna kill off Alfred, so let's just say they get separated. That's sad enough already, though it does leave a glimmer of hope that they'll see each other again.

Now alone, Bruce doesn't like to stay in one place for too long. When it comes to making a secret space for himself inside a wall/under a floorboard, it's a hideout, not a home. With his frequent moves, meeting other borrowers isn't too uncommon. He usually keeps interactions to a minimum, just giving or receiving basic info about the house and its humans.

But things change when he meets Dick. The young borrower is alone, and hurting in a way Bruce finds all too familiar. There's no way he can leave him.

The next time he goes in search of a new hideout, Dick comes along. Bruce tells himself that eventually, he'll find someone better-suited to take care of the kid. But every time they cross paths with another borrower, that initial feeling persists... he can't leave him.

He can't leave the next one either. Or the next. Or the... well, it's not like he went looking for all these kids.

I just love the idea of Tiny Tired Dad Bruce ❤️ And I'm very open to hearing thoughts about the various batkids as borrowers, because I don't claim to have in depth knowledge. Of course, there's a lot of freedom with this AU, but it's nice to integrate things from canon!

Off the top of my head, I like the idea that Dick is still something of an acrobat. For whatever reason, it's how his parents taught him to move about, and he is constantly climbing things or jumping around in such needlessly dangerous ways. Bruce gains several gray hairs just watching him.

For Jason, maybe they meet him when he tries to steal food from their stash? It's nothing malicious, just desperation from a kid who barely knows how to take from humans.

Cass is just... the Best Borrower. All of them are baffled by how well she can evade detection even in the most high-pressure, human-is-literally-one-move-from-seeing-you situations.

I realize that not every batfam member has a child/parent dynamic with Bruce, and I don't wanna change that, but it does complicate things. Like... am I gonna kill off Jim just so I can include Barbara??

Maybe 😏

sjsjdndkfgj NO. But we need the lonliness, we need the Angst. So at the very least, they've all been separated like Bruce and Alfred, and may see their loved ones again. Or you can imagine death, if you want that extra shot of pain lol

For Barbara, all I know for sure is I don't want to erase her disability. It'd be cool to see her design and create her own tools for mobility in a uniquely borrower way.

Also... Damian. Is borrower!Brutalia a thing?? Or is he adopted in this 'verse?

Either way, Damian is absolutely that borrower who carries a sewing needle/pin/whatever tiny sharp weapon is available. He is ready to stab.

Admittedly, I'm running out of steam, and my brain has yet to conjure anything specific about Duke, Steph, or Tim 😔

But no matter the specifics, or how the character dynamics exist in this world, they're undoubtedly a family. A dysfunctional, ever-growing family that Bruce does his best to lead. Sometimes he fucks up, of course, but he's fiercely protective, and all of them know that their safety is his top priority.

As the family grows, the moving becomes less frequent. It's difficult enough getting everyone to agree on finding a new place, nevermind the nightmare of packing. Plus, Bruce is pretty sure the kids are trying to wear him down.

So when they make what is likely to be their final move, they decide it ought to be a big one. In fact, they end up all the way over in Metropolis 👀

I'm gonna write a follow-up to this post some other other time, and we can talk about Clark's role in all this!

(also don't ask me how a bunch of teeny people can logically travel that far... just know my brain is rotating scenes from Mouse Movies like The Rescuers or American Tail where mice stow away on human transportation 😂)

[mochegato]

I Can’t Fight This Feeling

Chapter 5

Chapter 1     Chapter 4

The Gotham air was clear and crisp and so very still.  Noises from traffic and strays rummaging through trash floated up, filling the otherwise empty air.  The peace was barely broken by the sound of two sets of feet landing on the rooftop.  They stood there awkwardly shuffling next to each other for a few minutes.  Finally something seemed to break and Red Hood removed his helmet, still not making eye contact with his companion.  Nightwing looked at him for a second before following suit and removing his domino mask.  They were far enough up that nobody could see them and if Jason wanted to talk eye to eye, Dick wasn’t going to deny him.

When Jason still hadn’t spoken a few minutes later, Dick took the initiative and spoke first.  “Thanks for helping us today.  I don’t think we could have handled it without you,” he clapped Jason on the back.

“You would have been fine.  You would have figured it out,” Jason shrugged.  “You always do.”

“Not easily.  Not without a lot of pain,” Dick corrected him.

Jason chuckled.  He gave him a skeptical look from the corner of his eye.  “First time I’ve been accused of not being a pain by you guys.”  

Dick laughed and nodded.  “It’s been a while.”  He paused and watched Jason for a few seconds.  “It felt nice… working together again.  I missed this.”

Jason looked out over Gotham.  “Yeah, wasn’t so bad.  Don’t think B was too happy though.”

Dick grimaced at the reminder.  “Bruce, he… you know he doesn’t approve of your tactics.  He isn’t sure how to handle you, what to expect.  And the bat on your chest.  It makes it seem like he approves of your methods.”

Jason nodded.  “Not going to lie.  That was the original intent.  To mess with B as much as possible.  Cause as much pain as I could.  But that’s not why I use it now.  The bat… I use it so the kids don't get scared.  So they know they can trust me.”  He sighed, his eyes flicked over to Dick quickly before returning to the skyline.  “But, I think they’ve started to figure me out.  They know who I am now, so I can change that. I can take it off, use something different.”

Dick shook his head.  “No, you keep it.  I’ll smooth it over with Bruce.”

Jason nodded absently and kept his gaze focused on the city.  He shifted anxiously for a few moments nervously twitching.  Dick eyed him curiously.  He couldn’t remember the last time Jason looked nervous.  Angry? Yes, he’s seen that a lot. Annoyed, most definitely.  He’s even seen surprise and fear.  But he didn’t think he’s seen nervous since before… well, just before.

“You know, haven't killed anyone in a long time, right?” Jason asked quietly.

Dick’s eyes widened in surprise.  He had noticed, but he wasn't sure if it was intentional or a tactic to lull enemies and Bruce, though Dick wasn’t sure if Jason considered them as separate categories, into a false sense of security.  Dick kept his eyes looking out over the city, matching Jason’s gaze.  Jason was starting to open up, just starting to show some vulnerability, and Dick would be damned if he scared him off now.

“I did notice,” he nodded slightly.  “I just didn’t know the reason behind the change.”

Jason looked down again, shifting even more nervously now.  The sounds from the cars below floated up to them, filling the silence between them while Jason collected himself and prepared for the rest of the conversation.  “I'm getting married, Dickie bird.”

Dick gasped.  His head whipped to face him. He opened his mouth to say something, but before he could even figure out what he wanted to say, Jason continued.  “And she's good, Dick.  She's really good.  She used to be a hero, but doesn't remember it.  So when you meet her, you  can't say anything.  I’m only telling you so you understand just how good and trustworthy she is and B can never know.”

Dick stared at him, mouth a gape and eyes wide open.  When?  Did Jason say ‘when’?  He had heard that right hadn’t he?  “…too good for me,” Jason continued, ignoring the effect he was having on Dick.  “But she won't let me say that in front of her.  It's almost like she actually believes it, that I deserve her.”  He chuckled ruefully and shook his head at the floor.  He looked up at Dick searchingly, like the lost little boy Dick remembered from his childhood.  

“Can you believe that? Somebody actually believing that.  She's everything we were ever supposed to be, but better.  She’s more compassionate than you.  She’s smarter than Tim.  She’s more creative than Damian.  She’s braver than me.  She’s perfect.

“And you know how when you actually meet someone that you think really highly of and actually spend time with them, you start to realize maybe they're not as amazing as you thought they were?  That they’re just human and they have issues and failures just like the rest of us?”  Dick nodded absently, still focused on Jason saying ‘when he got to meet her.’  

“She's not like that,” Jason continued.  “I met her.  I’ve spent so much time with her.  Hell, I'm living with her now. And the only thing I’ve learned is she’s even more amazing than I originally thought.  She is everything to me.  She makes me want to be better, but never asks me to be because she already thinks I am.  She’s seen me at my worst and she still thinks… she still loves me.” He looked up at Dick with tears shining in his eyes.  “Can you believe that?  Can you believe someone thinks that?”

Dick gave him a small smile and pulled him into a tight hug.  “Yeah, Little Wing.  Yeah, I can.”  His grin grew wider as he replayed the words in his head.  Jason was happy.  He was really happy.  He was loved. His baby brother was getting married. He let out an excited laugh. “You’re getting married.”  He pulled away to look in his eyes.  “Tell me you proposed in an over the top romantic way.  I’d hate to think all those classic, romantic novels were for nothing.”

Jason chuckled and clapped him on the shoulder.  “I did,” he assured him.  He settled down on the edge of the building and patted the space next to him for Dick to join him.  “Lots of flowers and candles and nostalgia.  She cried.”  He clasped his hands together in front of himself and smiled into them.

“You did too, didn’t you,” Dick teased knowingly.

Jason shot him a halfhearted glare but nodded.  “Yeah, yeah I did.”

Dick sat with him for a few minutes just basking in being able to sit next to Jason peacefully for the first time in a long time.  Finally, he looked over at Jason with a curious look.  “So, she’s the reason you stopped killing?  She asked you to stop?”

Jason shook his head then bobbed his head to the side instead.  “Yes and no.  She’s the reason, but she didn’t ask me to stop.  I stopped before she knew what I did exactly.  I stopped before she found out.  I stopped before I disappointed her.”

“Does she know…” he vaguely motioned to Jason’s costume.

“Yeah.  I told her. She knows everything.  She isn’t thrilled about a lot of it… almost any of it, but she never left me.  So… she knows who you guys are too.”  He grinned at the memory.  “She said the butts definitely don’t match.  Batman has padding.”  He pursed his lips in a pretend annoyed face.  “She said Nightwing’s matches though.  She wants to know your workout.”

Dick barked out a laugh loud enough for it to echo down the street.  Jason narrowed his eyes at him and pointed at him warningly.  “Yeah, so keep your ass away from my fiancé.”

Dick laughed louder and threw his arm around Jason’s shoulders and pulled him into a side hug.  “I’ll make sure to only face toward her at all times when we meet.  No turning around.”  He nodded in mock seriousness.

Jason shoved him away playfully and groaned.  “Don’t make me regret this, Dickwad.”

Dick laughed again.  He grinned over at Jason.  He’d missed this.  He’d missed this connection, the banter, the brotherly teasing.  He’d missed Jason.  “So… has she met anyone else?  In the family, I mean.”

Jason gave him a mischievous grin.  “Oh, she’s met all of you, you just didn’t know who she was.”  Dick looked at him questioningly, his mind started racing through all the women they’d met for the first time in the last year. Having had two galas in that time frame and a launch party and quite a few charity events didn’t help narrow down the possibilities.  “She won’t be a new face to you.  But, Alfred knows who she is.  He’s met her. He’s the only one that knows about us. Alfred loves her.”  He grinned again remembering them together.  His eyes lit up at the memory.  “They bake together.  He taught her how to shoot a shotgun.”

Dick barked out another laugh.  “No way! He won’t even teach us.”

Jason smiled pointedly at him.  “Bruce won’t let him.  But, Bruce doesn’t know about her and he doesn’t control what happens outside of his manor.”  After a few minutes he looked down and furrowed his brow in thought.  “She really likes you guys.  I think she and Tim would be good friends if… if I… if it wasn’t for me.  That’s one of the reasons… Family is so important to her and I want to have one with her someday.  So I thought… I thought maybe I should start with the one I already have.”

Dick nodded.  “It sounds like she’s had a big impact on you.”

Jason smiled back and stood up.  “She has. So, dinner?  Tomorrow?”

Dick stood up next to him and gave him another hug.  “Definitely.  Just let me know where and what time.  I’ll be there.”

“And Dick?”  Dick turned back to him questioningly.  “I don’t… I’m not ready for anyone else to know yet.”

Dick nodded in understanding.  “They won’t find out from me.  See you tomorrow, Jaybird.  Can’t wait to meet your fiancé.”

<><><><><> 

“You’re back earlier than you expected,” Marinette noted with a smile as she looked up from her sewing.  “Is that good or bad?  Quiet patrol?”

“Yeah.” Jason answered absently.  He ripped off his helmet and jacket.  He threw them both on the chair as he made his way over to Marinette. She squeaked as he picked her up and placed her in his lap.  He buried his head in her neck.  “Hey, Pixie.”

Marinette immediately dropped her fabric and wrapped her arms around Jason. She slowly stroked his back and gently scratched his head in an attempt to comfort him.  She nuzzled into his hair.  “Hey. Are you okay?  What happened?”

“It was fine.  I’m okay,” he assured her, hugging her a little tighter.  “I just ran into Dick tonight.”

She sucked in a breath and tightened her arms around him.  “Oh?” she tried to force her voice to stay casual despite the way her heart was racing.

“Yeah.”

Marinette waited a few minutes before continuing on.  “And how did that go?”

Jason pulled away from her so he could see her face.  He brushed some hair over her shoulder and settled his arm back around her before he spoke again.  “It went well actually.  He noticed that I changed.  He’s really excited to meet you.”

“Oh? You mentioned me?” she asked carefully. She knew how he felt about sharing any part of his life with is family.  Hell, she knew how he felt about his family in general so if he was sharing about her, it must have gone really, really well.

“Yeah… and I… um… invited him to dinner tomorrow, if that’s okay with you.”

Marinette’s heart stopped for a second.  He invited his brother to dinner.  He invited his brother back into his life.  This was… this was huge.  “I’m okay with it.  How do you feel about it?  Are you okay with him coming here?”

Jason settled his chin on her shoulder.  “I’m nervous… but excited.  I’m looking forward to it... I think.  I just… I don’t want to be a disappointment.”

Marinette pulled away from him just far enough to cup his face gently.  “The only one disappointed in you, is you. And you are far too hard on yourself.  You don’t deserve the way you treat yourself.”

“And B,” he added.

“Fuck Bruce,” she grunted before pausing.  “Not in a sexual way, obviously.”

Jason huffed out a laugh.  “Obviously.”

She stroked his cheeks gently.  “Parents make mistakes.  They have flaws and foibles just like everyone else.  You don’t become a parent and suddenly you’re perfect.  All the same flaws and foibles you had before are still there, just amplified by stress and fear of making a mistake.  But those aren’t yours to take on.  You aren’t responsible for his flaws.”

Jason chuckled, a mischievous glint in his eyes.  “Foibles, huh?”  He waggled his eyebrows.  “Oh yeah, talk literary analysis to me, baby.  Break down those characters for me.”

Marinette pushed his face away with a groan.  “Nerd.”  He laughed and hugged her closer.  Marinette looked back up at him adoringly and smirked.  “Just focus on the chaos when he finds out it’s me.”

Jason grinned back at her.  “He’s going to be so annoyed.  You’ve been working with them for months and he never knew.”  He chuckled at the thought.  “It’s going to be brilliant.”

Marinette laughed along with him.  “You should make sure to take a picture.”

Jason turned back to look at her.  His smile turned loving.  “You’re brilliant.”

Marinette rolled her eyes.  “Yeah, sure.”

“You are.”  He moved his head closer to hers.  “You’re brilliant” He kissed her forehead.  “…and beautiful.”  He kissed her cheek.  “…and brave.” He kissed her other cheek.  “…and… um… benevolent.”  He kissed her jaw.  “… and…”

She grinned at him and moved her lips until they were just a few centimeters from his.  “Run out of attributes already?”  She looked down at his lips and back up to his eyes.  “Shame.”  She stood up and walked out of the room with a flirty glance over her shoulder.

“Hey!” he called after her.  “I wasn’t done.  That was just the B’s.”  He grinned as he watched her swish her hips as she walked down the hallway.  “Come back here and let me love you, woman!” He jumped over the back of the couch and raced down the hallway after her.

End

Tags:

@jasonette-july-event @jayjayspixiepop @aespades @how-to-function-properly @pawsitivelymiraculous @maribatserver @toodaloo-kangaroo

[incorrectbatfam]

Can I get headcanons for an au where Bruce adopted the kids when they /were/ babies, please?

Use the bathroom, get comfortable, and maybe have some tissues on hand.

For these headcanons, we’re gonna assume they were adopted in order of age, and that they’re all under 18. So Dick and Babs are 16 (with Babs being older), Harper is 14, Cass is 13, Jason is 12, Tim is 7, Steph and Duke are both 5 (with Steph being older), Carrie is 3, and Damian is 1. Yes, I’m aware that it diverges from canon age gaps but once you keep reading you’ll see why I did that.

Now for the headcanons (in no particular order):

Alfred is “Grandpa” and Bruce is anything from “Dad”, “Pops”, “Old man”, “Baba”, etc. All the other adults, like Kate or Clark, are aunts and uncles.

Steph and Duke compete over everything, like who can tie their shoes the fastest or learn to ride a bike first. Steph makes a point of letting everyone know she’s older, but Duke fires back with the fact that he’s taller. They’re both at the top of their kindergarten class and are known for butting heads, but God help anyone who decides to pick on one of them.

Harper got her first period at school while wearing white shorts. Thankfully, Dick and Babs came in clutch.

At school, Kon told Tim that he got ten dollars every time he lost a tooth. Tim tried to hack the system by pulling a bunch of teeth out at once (thankfully to no avail) until someone caught him.

Babs has a different secret handshake with each person.

When Damian first came along, everyone expected Carrie to be angry or jealous since she’d no longer be the baby of the family. And she was a little jealous at first. But the moment she saw him, her eyes went wide and she whispered, “He’s so tiny” and vowed to protect him with everything she had.

The last business trip Bruce took was when Cass was a baby, and the reason why it was his last one was that while he was abroad, Alfred sent him a video of Cass taking her first steps and he burst into tears in the middle of a meeting because he wasn’t there to witness it in person.

Dick once used Damian as a wingman to pick up girls. It worked so well that Jason tried the same thing, only to have it grossly backfire on him.

Whenever Bruce needs a break, Alfred will call everyone to the living room for one of his infamous spy stories.

Cass is the queen of April Fool’s.

Tim, Steph, and Duke regularly climb on each other’s shoulders to try to reach the cookie jar.

Harper is a pro at getting gum out of people’s hair. Tim is a pro at the exact opposite. 

Bruce gives Dick “the talk”. Dick then gives it to Harper who gives it to Cass who gives it to Jason and by then it’s so misconstrued by then that Bruce has to re-give it to all the kids.

One time Jason lashed out at school and it led to the teachers referring him to a therapist. Bruce stayed with him during the first appointment and Jason admitted to feeling unwanted because of what some kids at school said. Meanwhile, back at home, all the other siblings were trying to get their names to be Damian’s first word, like a competition. None of them ended up winning because when the other two came home, Damian called out to Jason. (And Jason cried on the spot because it didn’t matter what people said at school, he was wanted by the right people).

Group outings with the Kents or the Allens are a normal occurrence.

Harper gave Bruce a heart attack when she DIYed her hair dye and piercings.

The first time Tim saw a shooting star, he was convinced that aliens had arrived to take over the world. His conspiracy-driven panic spread to his younger siblings and that’s how Alfred found them all hiding in a blanket fort wearing saucepans as helmets.

Steph once got lost at the mall and the first thing she did was buy ten Build-A-Bears. 

Cass regularly carries her younger siblings like suitcases.

Bruce never rushed Dick into getting a license or helping out around the house.

Harper once snuck on a train to the next town without telling anyone because she wanted to ask Kate advice on coming out.

Nobody got any sleep for the forty-eight hours when Damian’s favorite stuffed animal went missing.

Duke is a LEGO kid. Carrie is a horse girl. Together they created the ultimate toy equine sanctuary.

Bruce can’t ground the kids. They’ve unionized.

Jason is no longer allowed to pick movies on account of the time he chose an R-rated slasher.

It’s an open secret that Cass accidentally left Tim at a haunted house once. 

Alfred custom sews a ten-person "get along" shirt.

Duke once snuck Damian to school for Show And Tell. Steph ratted him out almost right away.

Jason tried to make his younger siblings reenact Shakespeare. It lasted a good thirty seconds before it dissolved into people hitting each other with props.

As a big mystery/conspiracy theory person, Tim was wholly convinced that Damian was an extraterrestrial because the first time he saw him, it was at the hospital where Damian was hooked up to a bunch of machines after he was born. It wasn’t until after three different people explained the concept of preemies to him did Tim finally get it.

Carrie loves to play dress-up and will rope in anyone in the vicinity.

Bruce’s favorite song to sing to someone when they’re upset is Lean On Me by Bill Withers

Cass taught everyone obscenities in sign language and it was all fine until someone caught Babs at school and she got detention

Alfred can’t remember the last time the house was not babyproofed.

Between birthdays, holidays, Gotcha Days, and other special days, there’s always a reason to celebrate at Wayne Manor.

Whenever they fly on the private jet Duke's in the cockpit insisting he knows more about airplanes than the pilots (Alfred or Kate) bc he watched the Planes movie.

Harper got matching leather jackets for all the sisters.

Bruce gives Tim "coffee" that's 90% milk and a splash of coffee for flavor.

Cass and Jason communicate solely in inhuman grunts.

Carrie can and will latch onto the first person she sees like a koala bear.

There's a running gag among friends on how many siblings Dick has because he tells stories without ever using names.

Bruce comes home after a long day of work and everyone drops what they're doing to dogpile on him.

Harper only got an after school job to pay for her Club Penguin membership.

They all make snowmen in descending size order with Bruce's being this huge towering one and Damian's being like three inches tall.

The girls have a "no boys (except the baby) allowed" zone.

Carrie can't pronounce the letters "R" or L".

When Damian learns to crawl suddenly all the other family members become a jungle gym.

Bruce doesn't notice when someone invites a friend over without permission because what's a few extra kids anyway?

Harper comes out and for a week people wouldn't stop making bi puns.

They try to do that thing where each family member puts a different colored handprint on the mailbox and they end up running out of space.

As the oldest Dick gets stuck with babysitting or he's forced to let Jason tag along when he goes out (bc all parents make their older kids do that) and he resents it but at the same time no one can talk trash about his siblings.

Damian's animal collection begins when he brings in a mouse from the yard. (Cue the hilarious siblings-helping-him-hide-new-pets montages.)

Someone beat Bruce for “World’s most attractive man”, but that’s okay because he was voted “World’s happiest man” instead.

[hood-ex]

So from the looks of it..Robin and Batman #1 is so far better than Seeley’s Robins?

Robins #2 is mostly cringe. The character voices, for the most part, aren't the best. Some of the diction is siiigh. I don't like the implication that Dick and Tim are the goody two-shoes while Jason and Damian are the opposite. And even though Dick proved that he wasn't, it was weird how Jason and Damian acted so surprised about it.

The Robin and Batman #1 storyline is a bit more interesting to me. I think it shows a different view to Dick's grief for his parents while also showing his doubts about living with Bruce:

Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe I never should have gone with him. But what was the alternative? At least I’m not alone anymore. When I’m alone for too long, the ghosts come.

The line, "What was the alternative?" sticks out to me since Dick didn't have a choice in where he ended up. Depending on the iteration, it was either be taken in by Bruce or stay in the orphanage/juvie.

I think it makes sense for him to question his place in Bruce's life since he's still new to the manor and also having a rough patch with Bruce over being Batman's partner. At this point, he wouldn't see himself as Bruce's son. He would be viewing himself as Batman's upcoming partner. If Bruce takes away Robin from him then what is he to Bruce? What is he supposed to do?

(That was touched on in RYO when Dick ran away from home. “You don’t want a partner. And you don’t need a son. I’m sorry I failed you.”)

So I like to see him questioning his purpose in that way.

And then it all snowballs into something worse when Alfred suggests that maybe Dick can go out into the field in a few years, and Dick is like, "That's not why I agreed to come here! That was not part of the deal!"

It seems odd that Dick "agreed" to come to the manor. That doesn't match up with him having no say on where he was placed in some other iterations.

Unless it's like Dick's first appearance in comics where he agreed to help Batman, did that, and then Bruce was like, "So you wanna head back to the circus or what?"

And Dick was like, "Nah, mom and dad would want me to continue fighting crime. And I love adventure."

Robin definitely helped Dick feel like he had a purpose in the family (and in life) rather than just being the orphan Bruce took in but didn't really interact with (depending on the iteration). So I just think it's interesting that it's implied that Dick never would have agreed to come live with Bruce if he didn't get to help in Bruce's crusade. Referring to it as a "deal" he made is a bit odd.

ANYWAYS. Dick sewing a Robin costume is kind of fun if you imagine his mom or dad teaching him how to sew in case he ever needed to sew part of his circus costume or something like that. Or maybe even if Alfred had already taught him some basic sewing stuff. But him knowing enough to sew a whole outfit for himself is... maybe a little questionable sladkja. Maaaybe. Whatever. It's not like his handmade costume is his official one.

Killer Croc recognizing Dick's costume from the circus because he was part of the circus as The Monstrous Crocodile Man is... I don't even know, really. Actually, no. I do know. I think it's just another Gotham villain somehow getting personally tied to Dick's backstory unnecessarily. Dick's already got the Owls, Raptor, and Melinda. Now we're adding Killer Croc to the list? Aight. Regardless, I'm curious to see where Waylon's storyline in this issue is going.

Oh, and about the soldier thing. Bruce referring to Dick as a soldier is something I ignore at this point. It's been a word used to describe the Robins so many times, and I've gotten to a place where I'm mentally like, "Mhmm. Kay. Moving on."

All in all, some things about this are a bit questionable, but I'm looking forward to the next issue. It's interesting since it takes place around the time that Dick was newly orphaned. And it's nice for us to get an insight into how overprotective Bruce was in the early days (even if he does come off like a bit of an asshole in the process). The art is also a plus 👌🏻.

[batfoonery]

Crafty Batkids

Literally. Just batkids doin' crafts. As someone who does..... way too many crafts to list here (I'll send a list if asked but just trust me) I feel like I've gotten a good feel for this.

Dick

My man grew up in a circus, regularly checking ropes and tensions....

Macrame. He's a pro at macrame. Maybe he doesn't do it often, but like. For his friends, he'll sometimes surprise them with lil gifts.

When any of his Titans buds move he makes them those fancy hanging macrame plant holders. Donna and Kori both love them, and have been known to fight over them during white elephant/dirty Santa type gift games.

Probably doesn't have the ability to sit still for long periods of time, so can't do anything that'll unravel if he puts it down. It takes him a long time to finish a project, so he really only buys materials as he starts a new one, and doesn't have any excess stuff lying around his apartment.

Jason

You cannot tell me he doesn't crochet to unwind. Like. Idk if he's any good at it, but he def angry crochets.

Probably has been working on one scarf for like five years

Never has consistent stitches

Likes touching all the yarns at the store

Probably just enjoys squishing the yarn in general tbh. It's slightly more satisfying than ever actually doing anything with the yarn.

Cass

One time Bruce took her to like. Silver Dollar City or somewhere else that had someone with a loom, and she was fascinated. She made him buy her a shawl and then made Tim put together a power point about why she should have a loom.

Bruce ended up caving and buying her one that's skinnier, for like table runners. It's great, because she's mostly fascinated with making gradients in her weaves.

She learned Swedish Weaving (it's a like an embroidery/weaving hybrid) so she could embellish her works.

Mostly gives them out as gifts. She gave one to Selina, who guards it possessively. Harley tried to borrow it once and about lost her fingers.

Probably also learned to make little tassles for the ends

Tim

Attention to detail? Obsession over the minutia? Oh. You know my boy is an epoxy resin artist.

Has a crafting station in his room that's meticulously organized. There's cubbies for pigments, flowers, glitters, bits of ribbons and strings, etc etc

Probably makes all kinds of thing tbh. Phone cases, trinkets, you name it. But pens are his favorites, because they're both simple and practical. There's like a whole army of pens that just... keeps growing in Titans Tower because he always forgets where he's put his.

None of his teammates realize he is the source of the pens. They (Kon, Cassie, Bart) just think the pens are an infestations and/or are pairing up and making baby pens. But Cassie and Bart love them bc ✨aesthetics✨

Probably has a tik tok or an insta where he posts videos of himself de-molding things to soothing lofi tracks. Literally just. All the vibes. It's gorgeous.

Steph

Also all the vibes. She is a bujo/stationary queen.

Her collection is much messier than Tim's, but has a surprising amount of overlap. Sometimes they borrow things from each other, and have collabed on their social accounts (he makes journal covers, she makes them into notebooks, he supplies her with pens, she uses them when making a weekly/monthly set up, etc)

Stickers and glitter everywhere

Probably sponsored.

Canonically draws cute little cartoons in the comics, they absolutely are a regular on her socials and in her bujos.

Duke

For some reason I don't peg him as being as craft-oriented as his closest-in-age sibs? He probably has less expensive coping mechanisms tbh

That being said I can see he would enjoy those stores where you go in and paint pottery and they kiln/glaze it for you? Like he isn't into sculpting it himself, but painting the little kitchenware pieces or statuettes is relaxing.

He paints mugs for all his sibs on their birthdays, and for Alfred.

Alfred probably has a whole army of custom mugs made for him by the kids, now that I'm thinking about it. Like half of them are from Duke, because he doesn't know what else to do with them. There are just so many because it's so simple.....

Kate Kane, Tatsu Yamashiro, and Jeff Pierce also all have mugs. Actually... Lowkey highkey I can see that Tatsu might have introduced Duke to this kind of stuff in the first place? I can see that she would enjoy something simple that you can do while trying to clear out your mind.

Damian

Well. Damian is a gifted artist, but this translates differently into actual crafts. It just does.

He's probably a good printmaker. Not only does this take advantage of his art skills and keen attention to details, but it's one of the oldest artforms still in practice today. Most printmakers develop their techniques by perfecting one of several forms of the art, which have been passed through generations, and have a really firm grip on art history. Those stories would appeal to Damian, in addition to the craft itself.

Damian is the most likely of his siblings to be able to sit still for prolonged periods of time and do a repetitive motion. In fact, it may actually be something he can enjoy if it means he can just zone out for a bit. So, he's probably actually decent at spinning yarn. If the sky is grey and rainy, he drags out a wheel and some pre-sorted rolags and spins yarn, exclusively for Cass, who then weaves it. He enjoys the progression of colors in the fibers as much as she does, and they bond over it.

The feeling of different fibers slipping through his fingers is also really soothing. Bad day? Time to spin some merino, because it slips like water through his touch. Need to feel grounded? Time to spin a cotton blend, because you have to be present enough not to chafe your hands on the rough fibers...

Probably also really good at embroidery, for the same reasons. Plus, it's really satisfying to feel and hear the pbt-psht, pbt-psht of the needle and thread pulling through the taut fabric.

Bruce

Obviously knows how to forge/metalwork. I like to imagine he's also dabbled in lost wax casting.

Probably has little trinkets he made when he was younger scattered around the house. Maybe he donated a few to charity auctions.

Has made rings/jewelry pieces. But doesn't talk about them. (One ring went to Selina, and a pair of earrings went to Talia)

Alfred

The all-talented, all-knowing. There's probably nothing he can't do. He already sews all their outfits. So I mean.

Sometimes it feels really good to have something to stab. I'm not saying he does needle felting, but I'm not saying he wouldn't.

Probably was the one who taught Bruce about lost wax, and the one who helps Damian research about printmakers.

Silently supplies all the kids with all the art things.

Has a chest in his room filled with all the things that he's been gifted with over the years. There's little uneven macrame hanging from when Dick was just getting the hang of it, lumpy scarves that are too short for anyone to realistically wear from Jason, linen sets made by Cass, various trinkets from Tim, handmade cards and notebooks from Steph, mugs from Duke, and old embroidery pieces from Damian in unevenly stained hoops.

[batwngs-archive]

okay once more. outside of vigilantism. batfams favorite hobbies and do they try to share their hobbies with others 😌😌

omg holly ilyyyyy 

dick’s hobbies :) he plays the guitar and is a photographer! while the guitarist one is canon, I think he does it more with friends and fam, but its nothing professional on his front. he probably enjoys playing it for his friends and for dami and cass. as for photography, it’s something donna taught him and of course he isn’t a professional with it, but he loves to take photos of his friends goofing off together-- he keeps a photo album of all these memories and its something he really treasures; but, I dont think he shares the album with others, it’s something really precious to him so its probably like locked in a safe 

babs canonically sews! she makes little plushies of everyone’s alter ego and they’re soo cute 😩 she definitely shares these plushies with the fam, mostly with cass since they did spend a lot of time together. I think babs even tries to teach cass how to make them and generally sew 

jason I think would try to get into book binding and restoration; bruce and alfred collected classic first editions together, so I think jason would try and find some first editions to send to alfred but obv a lot of first editions, let alone used books, are not in the best condition so he might try and dabble with fixing them up! it might help him stay focused and ground him when he has his panic and anxiety attacks; and it may remind him that his hands are good for something, that they aren’t for destruction but for repair (kind of poetic that a once dead now resurrected man can use his hands to resurrect dead tales) I don’t think he shares this hobby with others, probably jut alfred

I think duke and tim might get into like building computers together idk why but I feel like they would watch a movie together and just try and tech it out and they just ended up building a computer. I also think duke would be into legos for a bit with damian like they would build extravagant landscapes and settings together :) other than that, duke writes poetry! he loves the freedom of expression and the rhythm poems can possess! there’s a lot of free range with poetry and he loves just spending time by himself writing poems about his experiences. I don’t think he shares this with others, and if anyone were to find out he would deny it

send me questions or headcanons bc im bored <3

[dilfbatman]

dil do you have any spare soft dad bruce headcanons? love that dilf

omfg... my brain is always on soft dad dilf bruce mode

- bruce loves to hang out w his kids any chance that he gets bc he knows time is priceless/his babies have grown up right before his eyes and he just wants to be aware/attentive to his kids

- does a family photoshoot/portrait every year! it’s pretty casual and he does a family one and makes sure to get one w each of his kids (and lets the kids/himself/alfred do memey ones) - and his picture with jason is one of his favorites bc jason is genuinely smiling and has his arm slung over bruce’s shoulder and bruce is v overwhelmed w emotion and just hugs jason afterwards and cried a bit. the whole family is now in a huge bear hug and bruce is crying laughing and jason is holding his tears in laughing and everyone else is trying to jump onto bruce & jason

- bruce and tim are so similar in so many ways and they both will sometimes at 4 am go to the batcave and play games on the batcomputer <3 they both have Gamer Chairs and eat chips and drink energy drinks until they knock out and tim will Absolutely be snuggled into bruce bc bruce is a human space heater and gives the best dad snuggles <3 tim also is one of the main batboys who loves to lecture bruce and bruce can’t help but listen to tim’s conviction and is ultimately put in timeout by his own son LMFAO but also bruce is a brown immigrant father so he will cut up fruits and such for his kids and does so for tim all the time... that’s how he shows especially that he loves tim and he gives it wordlessly

- i have a vision in my brain that one day dick is doing a performance at a circus either for fun or for a mission and his whole fam is in the audience and he’s smiling super wide and he takes that step to do the trapeze and all bruce can do and all everyone can do is watch in utter awe and at the end bruce is really crying hard bc it’s such a full circle moment... like it all started w having dick in his life and he hugs him and cries so hard and then everyone once again groups hug it out (damian punches bruce near the balls so he can hug dick) (valid) <3 in the carride home dick and bruce can be seen blasting music and singing like back in the old days

- bruce cass duke are like SO unbelievably close in my mind... they’re his babies and he can never say no to them so like everyone else they’ve been taught the art of asking for dumb shit bc bruce is incapable of seeing his kids be Sad... cass wants to buy a ballet studio? done! duke wants to buy a ferrari? lemme guess it’s bright yellow... done! cass and bruce like to knit together and sew and w duke bruce loves to go out! they go shopping or minigolfing or go on bike rides and i think in his heart he has some of the softest spots for them... they’ve seen how hard and cruel the world can be but they choose to do good and it makes him v proud

- bruce and jason... now i have so many feelings about these two... it reminds me of that quote “it’s rotten work” “not to me. not if it’s you” i think no matter what life or death throws at them you can’t get rid of that genuine love! bruce still has a picture of jason in his wallet (he does of all his kids but jason is the only one with 3 pictures) and when jason has nightmares bruce is there to hold him! jason teaches bruce how to bake and cook so they both like learning new recipes together :’) they bring back their reading time and they also like to ride their motorcycles together

- bruce & dami <3 i love the idea of damian warming up to the people he loves by giving them art & paintings! one day damian gives bruce a portrait of bruce & his parents that damian made himself and bruce is speechless but he’s about to cry so unbelievably hard and he hugs damian so fucking hard and just whispers i love you’s and thank you’s and damian knows how much it means to him :’) bruce puts it above the mantle! they both also fund many animal shelters together! bruce & dami can be also found at the arcade playing cheese viking and you can always find bruce somehow holding his son when they’re out :’)

- also. again bruce is a brown immigrant father therefore he is ALWAYS done w his children. he has his kids on a physical leash like when they go to batmart or something bruce has damian on a bat leash bc damian will always run away and jason is sitting in the cart and so is dick and duke is on bruce’s back getting a piggy back ride and cass and tim are both on the side of the cart annoying jason & dick respectively <3 alfred is in the maldives drinking a mimosa

[rosalineandrosemary]

one final goodbye

hi! i wrote this for @maribat-angst-fluff-april with prompt 14, goodbye. you can check out my partner, @yoltastic09 ‘s fluff submission here. anyway, warnings for major character death and descriptions of blood and the fic is below the cut!

the video is blurry, filmed with shaking hands. when it focuses, they see a girl coated in red spotted spandex. she’s leaning against a wall, eyes closed and smiling softly, but their eyes are locked on the stab wound through her abdomen.

“thanks… thanks alya.” her voice is soft and raspy, and behind the camera, someone chokes on a sob.

“lb, please. just hold on a bit longer. chat... carapace. Someone will bring your lucky charm and it’ll be okay.” the voice, alya, trembles, and the spotted girl’s eyes fly open.

“i didn’t tell you, did i? alya, there’s no saving me. that’s why we’re recording this. I have his miraculous but my lucky charm can’t fix me. it’ll fix paris and i’ll still be here.” the camera falls to the ground with a clatter, and beyond the black screen they can hear alya’s sobs. 

“alya please, I need you to do this. I need to be able to tell them myself. I need to be able to tell you myself.”

“tell me what?” alya’s voice is thick and broken, and the camera is lifted off the ground. they see a girl, fox ears coming from her head and in another spandex suit, before the camera focuses on the bleeding girl again.

“hello viewers, hi alya. my name is marinette dupain-cheng, also known as ladybug. and this is my final goodbye.” 

the dark room where they sit is filled by the sound of things shattering, a mug falling to a ground, a wine glass being crushed in someone’s tight grip. 

“alya, i love you. it’s been an honor fighting alongside you as ladybug, and despite our ups and downs, and even how things were before you got your head on straight, it’s been amazing being your friend. i’m so sorry that this is how things turned out.” alya sniffles, and her soft words are easily picked up by the mic.

“mari, please. you can’t leave us, please.” marinette smiles and looks away, faltering. she takes a deep heaving breath and looks back at the camera. 

“maman, papa, i’m so sorry i couldn’t tell you about this. i’m so sorry that i can’t say goodbye properly. i’m sorry that i lied and i’m sorry that i kept this from you. i just didn’t want you getting hurt. you two are the best parents a girl could have and i’m so grateful to call you two mine. please don’t blame yourselves. i chose to keep this a secret to protect you, and you raised a pretty clever little girl. there isn’t anything you could have done to stop this.” marinette is crying at this point, tears streaking across the red of her mask and down her cheeks. “make sure they see this alya. please make sure they see this.” 

“of course, i promise girl. i’ll do anything.” alya’s voice is broken but marinette nods solemnly before continuing. 

when they see this, marinette’s parents wail and sob, the sounds echoing throughout the arrondissement. their neighbors tense, waiting for the destruction their akuma could cause, but hawkmoth is gone, and tom and sabine dupain-cheng are free to mourn their only daughter. 

“bruce, or, well, dad. i thought you might want to hear me call you that at least once, considering i’m not going to be able to meet you again for you to hear me say that legitimately. i’m sorry i didn’t tell you about this. i’m sorry that when i said goodbye, that when i said i’d see you again soon, that it turned out like this. it was nice being your daughter, at least for a little while.” the viewers turn to look at him with the mention of his name, and bruce opens his palm, glass shards falling to the floor. he stands up, staggering to the side, and walks out of the room.

when bruce had first met marinette, he thought she’d fit in with the rest of them. he wasn’t oblivious to the jokes his kids made about the black hair, blue eyes, and the way she held herself made him think she’d fit in in other ways too.

she was always cautious, always nervous, like she was expecting something to attack her out of nowhere. she was good at hiding it, beaming sunshine smiles and a charming yet genuine demeanor, and he could see the resemblance from miles away. he had seen her baking with alfred, laughing with dick and jason, drinking coffee with tim. she had found a slot in their family and fit herself there perfectly, and in the short time he knew her, he had grow to care for the daughter he was unaware he had.

the last time he saw her, she hugged him and smiled, a soft tentative thing, as she whispered goodbye. she turned to leave, but her back was too straight, her shoulders too tense. he swore to himself that he’d find out what was troubling her back in paris and that he would see if there was anything he could do about it. 

bruce never got the chance. 

“dick. you’re a great older brother. i’m sorry that i couldn’t be your younger sister for very long. it could have been fun. we might have done acrobatics together, or you could have showed me trapeze if you wanted. you try so hard to take care of people, please remember to take care of yourself.”

marinette, dick thought, was tiny. she was so much shorter than he was, and she looked up at him when she introduced herself. bruce’s other unknown child. she has the hair, and the eyes, clouded with the same world-weariness he had seen in all of them. he hadn’t been the first to meet her, as that honor had gone to bruce and alfred, and tim had been walking by when she walked in the door, but he had been the first to declare her his younger sister. he asked her questions and she responded, she asked him questions and he responded. 

he learned of her love of fashion and cooed as she bashfully showed off her outfit that she had sewed and designed herself. he told her of his gymnastics and trapeze skills, and she was wide eyed and nearly glowing when she asked if he could teach her. he had swallowed heavily, looked away and back at her, and told her that “maybe we can next time, marinette. i think b-man has an itinerary for you and everything.”

she had looked disappointed for a second before composing herself. “okay, maybe next time. but speaking of mr. wayne, i should probably go find him again, talk to you later dick!” he had heaved a sigh of relief, scared of bringing her so close to something that had already taken his family once. 

when he hugged her goodbye before she left for the airport, small hands clasped around his back, dick resolved that he would try to teach marinette the trapeze next time she came over. There would be nets and she wouldn’t get hurt and then there would be more memories of the trapeze that didn’t come with the bittersweet tinge of all his memories at haly’s circus. 

dick didn’t get that chance. 

“hi jay. i was making you something, did you know that?” marinette laughs softly, then inhales sharply as she aggravates her wound. and yet, she continues. “no, of course you didn’t. i didn’t tell you. it was almost done, just had a few finishing touches. you could still wear it though. it's a leather jacket. i saw that the one you had seemed to be getting worn out, thought you might want a new one. a new leather jacket for my big brother.” her tears quicken and she attempts to curl in on herself, even as her body lay against the wall. she looks so small. “even if your advice wasn’t the best you were still there and i was happy to be ‘pixie pop.’ i wish you were here. you’re safe, you know that? you feel safe, like if anything tried to hurt me you’d fix it. And i’m scared but at least other people are safe now. Thank you for making me feel safe.”

jason todd did not think he was a good man. there was too much blood on his hands for that. and even if the bastards had deserved it, it still didn’t make him a good person. so when he had seen the tiny slip of a girl who ran into him as she attempted to find bruce, his first instinct had been to stay away. she was so tiny, so pure, and no amount of washing would ever be able to clean his hands. 

but then she had flinched and started spewing out apologies, hands flying everywhere as she drove herself further down this spiral, and he saw in her what he had seen in so many of the other street kids. fear of retaliation, a desperation to appease him because she was afraid of what he might do.

and jason was furious. not with her, but with whoever had taught this girl (bruce’s daughter. he had warned them all about her, telling them to hide the objects that showed their “nightly pursuits.” he hadn’t told them she’d be so small.) that she had to apologize like this. whoever had traumatized her in this way. 

“hey, no need to apologize, pixie pop. no harm, no foul, right?” she had looked up at him, confused, and he grinned at her and clenched his fists, trying to dispel some of the anger festering in his chest. 

“who’s pixie pop?” she had said, eyebrows furrowed adorably.

“you are, of course. because you’re so tiny, like a little fairy. and all my siblings need nicknames, like dickie-bird, or replacement, or demon spawn. and since you’re my little sister now, you get a nickname too.” she had smiled and nodded, responding with a soft “okay,” and he swung an arm around her shoulder.

“so let me help you find bruce. but on our way there, is there anyone you’ve got any problems with? Any bullies you’d like big bro jason to deal with?” she had tensed, pursed her lips, and shook her head.

“there’s nothing you can deal with. it’ll be fine.” he hadn’t believed her, but he wasn’t going to pry.

when he hugged her goodbye, she had shook, clutching the sleeves of his jacket within her hands, but when he went to ask her what had happened, she said she’d tell him next time. he said he’d help her through anything.

jason never got the chance. 

“cass.” with this, she attempts to lift her hands from where they lay on the floor. she’s shaking with the effort, but manages to hold them up to her chest. slowly, she signs out every word with her hands. “i think that you could tell something was up. i don’t know how, and i’m not sure even you knew it would end up like this, but i think you could. thank you for trusting me, even if it ended up like this. thank you for being my friend, and i’m sorry i couldn’t improve my sign language fast enough to have a full conversation with you. i hope this is good enough.”

cass could tell that marinette was like them from the way she held herself. she had muscles curled under her clothing, and whenever she tripped she shifted her center of gravity if she didn’t catch herself first. 

cass hadn’t really spoken with her, standing as bruce introduced her to marinette. she could tell when marinette had processed bruce saying she preferred sign language, and when marinette’s shoulders sunk, she could tell it was with concern instead of malice. 

marinette turns to her with a small frown, apologizing for not knowing any sign language. marinette smiles afterwards though, and reaches out a hand. “i’d love to learn asl though! and i’d also love to be friends if you’d want to be. of course we don’t have to be, i don’t want to…” she trails off as cass takes her hand and nods. marinette’s smile grows wider and a small warmth grows in her chest. 

friends sounds nice. and marinette promises that she’ll try to learn asl and they’ll have a conversation in a way that cass is comfortable with, talking with that same smile. 

the last time cass sees marinette, she signs goodbye. marinette’s right hand goes up, thumb out, and she closes the rest of her fingers to her palm. she continues with the sign for cass’ name, and cass responds in turn, goodbye and marinette, and marinette leaves, excited at getting it right. 

marinette inhales, a wheezing breath, and the video is interrupted by the sound of heavy footfalls and a man’s calling voice. “ladybug? rena?” 

alya lets out another sob and the man approaches. they can tell when he sees marinette, as he stalls before sprinting towards them. 

he’s clad in blue and snake print, teal tips at the bottom of his black hair, and he goes directly for marinette, trying to press a red and black spotted objects into her hands. 

“ladybug please, please take it you can fix all of this with the lucky charm. just do miraculous ladybug and the magic will fix it.” he begs her, voice jumping. marinette clutches the object in her hand but makes no motion to do anything with it, and he speaks again. “ladybug…” he hesitates for a second before continuing. “marinette, my melody, please don’t die on me.” her eyes widen slightly before she looks away.

“i should have known you already knew, mon coeur. but you also have to know this is the end.” she smiles at him, lifts the object in her shuddering hands and attempts to yell miraculous ladybug. she’s cut off halfway through by her own coughing, shaking her whole body and sending blood spilling from her lips.

it works regardless though, and the remaining waynes watch in awe as glowing ladybugs reverse the property damage. they fix the walls and the pavement before crowding around marinette’s body, but when they leave the wound is still there. the blood is still there. 

marinette’s eyes are drooping, and when she tries to talk, it comes out a whisper. “damn it. i thought i had more time.” she coughs again, more blood dripping out of her mouth. “tim, i was so happy to be your work buddy. steph, you are so fun and so important and it was so so lovely being your sister and your friend. damian, i wish i could have been your sister without scaring you, but that won’t be a problem anymore.” her breathing is shallow but she continues going, trying to say all the words she’s scared she wouldn’t be able to. “alfred, being your granddaughter, baking with you, all of that was such a pleasure. babs, spending time with you was so much fun and i wish we could do that again, that we could be friends for longer. duke, i know we didn’t interact much but i wish we could have.” she exhales, leans her head back against the reformed wall. her eyes flutter closed. 

“goodbye.” she says, one last word before her chest stills and marinette dupain-cheng dies.