#alexandre berthier

[hoppityhopster23]

Late to the game but I’m adding because why not.

62. Don’t ask Larrey why he came to the treatment he’s using on the wounded. It’s all the right things for all the wrong reasons.

63. It’s not worth being neutral. Believe me, cities have been bombed horrendously for being neutral. If you do plan on it doing it anyways, just beat the British to it and blow up your own ships.

64. If involved in an affair with the Danish king, don’t bother cheating on him or try to run off. You may get exiled. But why should you? He pays well, and any kids with the guy will live richly.

65. Don’t speak badly of religion or the monarchy in Denmark. You may find yourself permanently exiled.

66. Don’t ask the Danish monarch about the lack of mailboxes in his kingdom. Just don’t.

67. What happens Danish officer parties stays in the Officers parties.

68. Please don't put the French and Russian Peacocks in a room. we don't need to watch that.

69. If Larrey needs something, he will tell you, no matter the time it is or what you are doing.

Napoleonic War Survival Tips for the French Army

1. Don’t refer to Marshal Murat’s uniform as “peacock wear” within earshot of him.

2. When Napoleon pulls out a map, don’t ask, “Are we lost?”

3. If your cannonball doesn’t quite reach the enemy lines, just blame the wind. Or Berthier.

4. Don’t accidentally toast “To King Louis” at an officers’ dinner. Ever.

5. Avoid playing cards with Marshal Lannes – unless you enjoy losing your entire month’s pay.

6. Foraging in enemy territory: Always ask what’s in the stew before you eat it.

7. If you’re sent to negotiate peace, don’t open with, “Our emperor said this would be easy.”

8. During winter campaigns, remember: snowballs do not replace musket balls.

9. Don’t try to outdo Napoleon in recalling historical battles. You’ll lose.

10. If Napoleon is inspecting the troops, resist the urge to ask, “Is it true you’re shorter than Murat?”

11. Never, under any circumstances, suggest that Wellington’s redcoats “don’t look so tough.”

12. If Marshal Ney orders a charge, just assume it’s going to last until nightfall.

13. Do not ask Marshal Davout if his nickname Iron Marshal comes from his cooking.

14. If your bayonet charge fails, remember: retreat is just “advancing in the opposite direction.”

15. If someone says “This mission is simple,” expect nothing but complications.

16. In case of defeat, remember: it’s always the Austrians’ fault. Even if they aren’t there.

17. During peace negotiations, “bombing their latrines” is not considered a formal strategy.

18. If you happen to capture a British officer, refrain from gloating by saying, “See you in Paris!”

19. When bivouacked near rivers, don’t bet on crossing without some form of disaster.

20. Finally, do not point the cannons at the Emperor’s tent, even as a joke. Especially not as a joke.

[captainknell]

*BOOK REPORT*

By Command of the Emperor, by SJ Watson

(my copy is plain and blue, but I'm guessing it once had a book jacket like the one on the right)

I initially did not know very much about Marshal Berthier but through @gabrielferaud I began to learn of the abuse he endured from Napoleon and I remembered I had this book.

I was surprised to learn that Berthier was 16 years older than our Emperor, and already had an accomplished life before Napoleon came into the picture.

In 1779,

Alexandre was now twenty-six years old. He had served as a topographical engineer, as a lieutenant in the infantry, and as a cavalry captain; and he was now on the personal staff of an army commander.

By the next year, he was serving overseas under General Rochambeau in the American Revolution alongside Washington and La Fayette! After three years in America, he returned to France.

And so Berthier - a cadet at the age of twelve, a general at thirty-nine and a private at forty - quietly resigned himself to the end of his military career, the more so because he had never held any personal ambitions other than to do his best.

Berthier would have been better off if he had retired at forty and had never met Napoleon Bonaparte. He would have disappeared into obscurity, but fate would have different plans. Alternately, Napoleon was very lucky to have found Berthier. I'm going to go out on a limb and say without Berthier, Napoleon wouldn't have been anywhere near as successful as he was. Yes, he was a great general, a great leader, a genius, but he needed someone who could understand his intentions and make sure his plans were executed with precision. That man was Alexandre Berthier.

For 18 years, Berthier served Napoleon. He was the chief of staff and the first to be made a Marshal of France under Napoleon. He endured Napoleon's temper and unjust scorn. Napoleon called him, "Uninteresting" and "no good" and "in the way". Napoleon hardly ever let Berthier take credit for his success but was quick to blame his own faults on Berthier. But Berthier was loyal through and through. When warned of Napoleon's temper early on, he said, "But remember that one day it will be a fine thing to be second to that man."

It was a very good book with only two things I thought were odd. 1) Napoleon forced Berthier to marry and it was later mentioned that he had two young sons. Nothing was mentioned about his wife being pregnant or the birth of his sons, or even their names. 2) Berthier died from a fall out of a window. The book implied that he was dizzy and fell out or that Caulaincourt (his friend!) had him murdered. I think he either fell or jumped on his own. I don't think anyone - especially Caulaincourt - had anything to do with it.

But all in all, it was a very good and informative book. I learned a lot about Marshal Berthier and saw another side of Napoleon that I am not used to seeing. Like with most books that aren't a general biography of Napoleon, I would definitely suggest having some background knowledge as things that are going on are not always explained fully.

[meneeddeadmenyaoi]

happy late halloween🎃

[sunsolii]

Decided it'd be fun to turn random Smiski pics from Pinterest into Napoleonic shitposts, enjoy

[thealexanderi]

Hi

[dinakisss]

Marshal studies

Guys I had to delete the other post cause I realized fuckass tumblr cut off oudinot and davout!🤬🤬🤬

[kririawhahha]

Instead of rewriting my notes for math I sat on twinote making random images of the sillies 😓

for some stupid reason nowadays tumblr wont load and all I see are blurred images and loading screens this is absolutely outrageous 😡😡

[itz-skyline]

Happy birthday day to Berthier, Napoleon's wife!

And here is a meme as an extra gift

[largecucumber]

Everyone’s tired after a long battle, but at least Marshal Murat looks great in his ridiculous hat 🎩 😮‍💨

How’re y’all doing?? 😣💖 I’m so bored. All I do is school and exercise. I’m so so shy when I go to the gym! There’re these huge men lifting huge weights like omg how?! 😖🏃‍♀️💨 Anywayssss, I’m so sorry about Eugene 😢 I don’t actually know what he looks like lmaooo

[kelvinthegoatt]

Doodles

[senechalum]

Could you draw Berthier, laughing as he was in Desaix’s description of him?

SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG !! I'm actually trying to answer all of my requests this week-end, and I started that one more than 10 days ago :(

I hope you didn't wait too long... sorry ;; I had a lot of fun drawing Berthier though, but his hair man. I really hope you'll still like him like that 🫣 I'm trying different brushes and how I can work with them, so the next few posts might have different brushes or different rendering... I desperately want to get better !!

[norrevu]

some sketches done from 'Kutuzov' (soviet film, 1943)

Alexander I, Napoleon, Kutuzov, Murat, Barclay de Tolly, Berthier

[captainknell]

Happy birthday Marshal Berthier! November 20, 1753

[meneeddeadmenyaoi]

A gift for myself as I've gotten to napoleonic fandom for 1000(+3) days🥰!

[sunsolii]

I know 'Euphoria' has been out for a few months now, but I still wanted to make a meme out of Davout and Bernadotte's beef using the iconic verse from the diss track. Plus, it's my favorite out of Kendrick's diss tracks

[cadmusfly]

i saw this warhammer meme on my dashboard and i knew i had to immediately apply it to dead frenchmen