#akutagawa head canon

[oikasugayama]

maybe some domestic fluff w/ aku like lazy mornings together? making tea/coffee, cuddling, him not letting you get out of bed🤭 hope you feel better lovely, the laundry detergent is literally foul bruh WHO DOES THAT :(((

I feel like Akutagawa is so soft and sweet in the morning. No one can be all tough and scary right after they wake up, you know??? one of my favorite posts that i think about literally every day is "humans are not meant to wake up and jump straight out of bed, they're meant to stretch and wiggle and hit snooze" and i quite literally live by that

akutagawa is all tired eyes and messy hair, and he's prob just in a black t-shirt and shorts or his underwear or something. he might have sleep lines on his face from where his arm or his pillow was mashed into his cheek for hours.

the sun shining in the room from the open curtains would make him look so soft and fuzzy (in that way the sun kinda blurs your vision sometimes yanno?)

you could probably reach over and play with the ends of his hair really gently or push his hair out of his face and pulls the blankets up over his shoulder to tuck him in a little more, and he probably wouldn't react because even subconsciously he knows he's safe, he knows he's with you. in the past or if he was alone he would jump at any little touch, but on a nice coy soft morning he's still and he sleeps deeply which he doesnt usually do

when he does finally wake up--probably at the feeling of the bed moving as you try to get up sneakily--his arms instinctively reach out for you. the first thing he wants to do in the morning is make sure his love is still there, still safe, still with him, so even before his eyes are open, even before he's processed any noises or movements, even before he's stretched and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and checked what time it is, he's reaching for you.

when he realizes that you're trying to get up he makes an incoherent noise, some type of grumble as he tries to take his voice up, just some sort of noise to let you know that he's displeased. no, don't get up, he's basically saying. stay with me. lay back down.

you usually relent. it's a game, kind of, trying to get up without waking him up. you'd feel accomplished if you could do it, but you'd also miss the feeling of him reaching for you. you've never actually managed to get all the way up without him waking up. the final loss of your weight on the bed always wakes him, and his arms or his hands always manage to find you before you can fully get away.

sometimes you think he's fallen back asleep as you're laying there, wrapped up in his warm arms, waiting for him to open his eyes. he always denies it when you ask, though, the first crackles of his voice tumbling out defensively. "i am awake, if only barely"

"shall i make us some morning tea?"

"five more minutes."

and you always oblige him, always without fail you lay together, him counting seconds off in his head until he has to force himself to let go of this single piece of peace that he gets in his hectic life, and you relishing in being held, in holding, in being warm and loved and calm and good

[rhai-stars]

Bungou Stary Dog Head canons(Pt.1?)

Dazai had a lisp when he had braces as a teen, and Chuuya would tease him about it

Tachihara convinced Gin and Hirotsu to get matching Black Lizard Tattoos

When Nikolai first discovered his ability, he would use it to absolutely terrorize people in games of hide and seek and tag.

Every year on his birthday, Dazai will skip out on work and bring a drink and extra glass to Odasaku’s grave. He pours the whisker into the extra glass and places it next to Odasaku’s grave, and drinks straight from the bottle.

Hirotsu was assigned to teach Dazai, Gin, and Tachihara how to drive. 

Dazai never paid attention so he still sucks at driving

Yosano is Ranpo’s wing-woman whenever he needs one

Junichiro is a theater kid

Kouyou is the member the Port mafia go to when they need a haircut

Kajji is banned from playing UNO with the executives because the last time he played, he got mad and tried to use lemon bombs

Fyodor learned of his ability when he and his significant other had been murdered by a stranger, and he had taken the culprit's body. Left alone without his S/O

Going back to ^, Fyodor avoids gaining meaningful connections in case of instances like this

Akutagawa and Gin share an apartment, and Tachihara will show up uninvited

Chuuya takes Q and Elise to the playground around once a week

Naomi’s natural hair color was blonde but dyed it

Kunikida calls his mom weekly, but has to stay away from Dazai because he will make interruptions 

Yosano, Ranpo, and occasionally Dazai will meet up to just talk about Gossip

Ranpo knew from day one Dazai was a PM executive

Fukuzawa gets father’s day cards from Yosano, Ranpo, Kenji, and now Kyouka every year

The coat that Dazai has is one of the One’s Oda had in his closet

Dazai didn’t wash his hands for days after Oda died

Atsushi let Kyouka paint his nails before

Every time Kenji returns to the ADA from his farm, he brings Kyouka a new flower for her hair

Q and Elise will have tea parties together

When fyodor wrote sigma into the book, he forgot to write a gender, so Sigma is essentially genderless

Dazai should wear glasses, but he’s too lazy to

Kouyou judges Chuuya for his haircut sometimes

A part of Chuuya was disappointed when Dazai left, but he just pretended to be relieved

Love craft showing up to any Guild meeting is a once in a blue moon event. 

Jouno and Tecchou have had arguments about Pineapple on pizza that lead to having Teruko break the argument up

[kalcium-yippee]

BSD emoji headcanons

This is inspired by my last post. The 5 last used emojis by bsd characters.

Atsushi: 😃😧🤣😸💗

Akutagawa: 🤬‼️🦶🏻👀🫁

Dazai: 💀🤡🙏🧑‍🦰🗣

Chuuya: 🤬🥱💀🖕🥊

Kunikida: 😡📒🖊💥👍

Ranpo: 🍩🍰🍫🦝🥰

Poe: 🦝🤔🤓🍩📘

Nikolai: 🥳💔🤞☠️🤡

Fyodor: 👍💣✌️🤡🇷🇺

Sigma: 🫥💜👍👎🛝

Jouno: 🚶‍♂️💩👽🐽👩🏻‍🦰

Tecchou: 🍙🍥😐🙄🚷

Before you question me trust I am Asagiri's overgrown left pinky toenail

[solsticelosthermind]

The more I learn about bsd!beast the more i feel like beast!dazai makes more sense to me than beast!gin and I’m. Goddamnit that’s a terrible sentence.

[n1thy4na]

This is so ridiculous that it would definitely work xd

Atsushi and Dazai should just start shit talking to get Aku and Chuuya to break out of the vampirism. just like “not u losing to a vampire ability rn damn no wonder port mafia sucks” bc personally I couldn’t let that slide pure pettiness and spite would awaken me

Dazai: not u growling and hissing at me rn I always knew u were a dog Chuuya: Chuuya: u will die by my hands today. Dazai: aaaand he’s back <3

Atsushi: Dazai put us together and look at u playing for the other team tsk tsk he’d be so disappointed Aku: Aku: what did u just say to me Atsushi: omg ur back. sorry I was just joking Aku: no what did u just say to me

enough of that “this isn’t like u [begging eyes emoji] [sparkle sparkle]” it’s time to switch tactics. RISE. RISEEEEE. where is ur fucking rage? where is ur anger?

[mitta-likes-moths]

me consuming any kind of media at any given moment:

That’s a neat habit

very cool and nice I like it a lot

…

oh shit I do that too

:0

[crushmeeren]

no bc thinking about akutagawa, the port mafia dog that everyone thinks is so scary (he is) but who is actually the biggest gentleman. who hates plants bc they’re such a hassle to take care of, but who buys you flowers and puts sugar in the water vase to keep them alive ! 🫧🫧

who also just loves biting you. who is the biggest dick in bed, choking you and watching you cum with slits for eyes. who’ll kiss your throat right after he bruises it.

i forget if this is canon or not, but i saw somewhere that he doesn’t know what the frilly thing around his neck is called 😭 (i think its a cravat?)

Oh my FUCK!! Just like that I’m being sucked in and writing about him… Also I think that’s correct, it’s a cravat. Levi from AOT wore one too.🤤

master list link

You’re right…. Ryuu is such a fucking guard dog — a Doberman, if you will. He’s tightlipped and terrifying when he tails you around town, or anywhere really.

You want a few inches of space while you’re in the bar? At the store? At a birthday party? Too fucking bad. He sneers at everyone who gets too close, challenging each person who dares chat you up in his presence without a single word. You smack him in the chest when he pushes the line, teasing him with a “down Ryuunosuke, be a good boy.” He huffs, unhappy, but backs off for the time being. Until something sets him off again.

Although you have to use an unfair amount of willpower not to show it, Ryuu’s aware, and smug, about the fact that his protective and obsessive behavior tugs on the part of your brain that tells you to shove him into the sheets when you get home.

This isn’t to go without saying that Ryuu’s such a sweetie when it comes to you. Like tooth rotting sort of sweet. It’s not so much displayed through words, but rather it’s spelled out in his actions. As stated above, the man does not have a green thumb. First off, plants require far too much attention. Attention that he’d rather spend on you. Second, even if he has tried to grow plants before, though he swears he hasn’t, they just seem to mock him. They die and if he’s honest, he can’t be bothered with whether they live or not.

But, for you, Ryuu did just enough research on how to keep flowers off of life support. When Ryuu brought you flowers for the first time and he noticed how your eyes brightened, how you buried your nose into soft petals and inhaled a lungful, only to hum in delight and aim the single most affectionate look he’s ever gotten at him, well, he needed the flowers to live for as long as you willed them to.

Ryuunosuke loves to suck bruises along your throat, your collarbone, any unmarked part of your body he can get his hands on. It absolutely ties into his possessiveness. You tell him he’s a “territorial ass,” but you moan his name and tilt your head to the side, spreading your thighs open as you insult him. You ask him for more kisses without really asking him.

He rolls his eyes but one side of his mouth twists into a smile, fitting himself snug between your legs. He always comes back with “Yeah? Well you’re a fucking brat,” pressing the harsh words into your collarbone. “You think I won’t mark what’s mine? That I’d let anyone not know who owns you?”

It’s got to be common knowledge that Ryuu is a jerk in bed. That he likes to tease, likes to edge you, even ruin your orgasm once in a while because his dick gets hard when you cry. A thrill races down his spine when you let him choke you, stomach drawing in tight. The pads of his fingers press deep into the sides of your throat, making your head throb and your cheeks flush hot to the touch when all your blood rushes to them. He almost bites the tip of his tongue off when your pussy squeezes the life out of his cock.

On the other side, something probably scratches the out of reach itch in Ryuunosuke’s brain when you take the reins from him. He’s always got too much on his plate, and being able to give up control satisfies his secret desire to be taken care of. His expression is never more open, never more loving, more tender than when you’re riding him. It’s slow and steady, you appreciate every inch of his cock as it slides in and out of your pussy.

You brace your hands on either side of his head and Ryuu stares up at you, his heavy lidded gaze mirroring yours as he pants, these small puffs of air that are just loud enough to make out. You repeat the smooth, steady rise and fall of your hips, lips parting and a breathy “Ryuunosuke,” drips off your tongue. You play it up a bit, knowing how worked up Ryuu gets when you moan his full name.

It works this time as it has all the others.

His breath stutters in his chest, nails digging in and pinching your ass. “Ryuunosuke, please baby, make me cum. Your cock is so good, help me.” Your pussy squeezes tight around him.

Ryuu’s eyes begin to roll, lids fluttering before he lets out a breathless laugh. “You’re playing with me, angel.” He’s too smart, he realized what you were doing from the get go. He secures his arms around your waist and rolls until your back hits the mattress. “Such a helpless little thing for me, aren’t you princess?” He pushes his hips forward and you swear the tip of his cock presses against your cervix.

Ryuunosuke trails his fingers up the underside of your forearms, tickling you, and laces your fingers together, pinning your hands by your head. He dips down to whisper in your ear.

“You don’t have to worry, my angel. I’ll ruin you. You’ll never think of another man or want someone else’s cock ever again.”

You belong to Ryuunosuke, but you knew that already, didn’t you?

[anexplosionofchaos]

so. guys. that new bsd chapter???? how we feeling??? we alright??

(insert deep breath)

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ATSUSHIS FACE. hes so fucking conflicted he wants him gone but still thats practically his FATHER. ohhh shoot me 87 times instead that would HURT LESS. his eyes being scribbles make it worse harukawa you are EVILL

i love the combination of the titles. dont even i love it so bad the chapter titles were pieces of the full sentence..... ajdflgjkg im Going Insane. this isnt okay im not okay im going to crash out so hard

oh.

oh.

this is insane. do you all know how insane this is. whos face, (or words) come to mind instead?? instead of the mentor akutagawa has despised yet idolised for half his life?

SHUT UP. SHUUUUTTTT UP.

SHIN SOUKOKU FANS WE ARE BEING FED. WE ARE FEASTING. these past chapters have been SPOILING US.

akutagawas reason to live, to keep going, its atsushi.

do yall know how absolutely insane this is. im tweaking out So Hard like this is INSANE. SHIN SOUKOKU WE ARE SO BACK. WE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN BACK. IM CRASHING OUT TWEAKING SHIN SOUKOKUUUU

THE FUCKING MOMENTS. THE FUCKIGGN MOMENTS WITH THEM FIGHTING ASAGIRI AND HARUKAWA WHAT HAVEE YOU DONEEE. guys atp stop writing the fics canon is all we need 😭

the fucking QUOTES atsushi said to him??? about true strength???? might as well have chucked a brick at me.

im so insane this chapter isnt okay

THE LIGHT COMING BACK INTO HIS EYES????? AT THE MEMORY OF ATSUSHI????????? THIS ISTHE MOST QUEER THING EVER SHIN SOUKOKU YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS

no but do yall know how wild this is. him getting that "light" in his eyes because of atsushi. do YALL KNOW. his eyes being dark for most of the manga (showing how dark his soul is) BUT THIS. THIS IS THE BRIGHTEST THEYVE EVER BEEN. and its at the thought of saving ATSUSHI. HIS RIVAL MORTAL ENEMY. no this is wild actually

harukawa my lord and saviour i love you.

HIS REASON TO KEEP FIGHTING. HIS REASON TO KEEP GOING. hes LITERALLY fighting god to get atsushi back. literally fighting something practically unkillable to get his jinko. asagiri i fear this is the hardest you have ever cooked. shin soukoku this is the queerest you've ever been. we are winning so hard. my brain is a jumbled mess of shin soukoku i cant go live my life when this is happening.

NEW CHARACTER EVERYONE CHEERED

they look so cool im genuinely so hyped for them. bsd is getting insane i Swear. im actually so fucking excited for what happens next i feel all electric and tingly

genuinely this chapter was insane. im going to go mentally scream in my head all day and not think of anything except sskk now. goodbye

[kyouka-supremacy]

And it's already been said a million times, but Atsushi must have replayed Akutagawa's last moments in his head day and night. I mean, we got three flashbacks of that scene in canon already, and counting. He quoted Akutagawa's last line word by word, down to mimicking his facial expression perfectly. How haunted was he by that moment? How long did he spend replaying that nightmare in his head? How many sleepless nights? How many times did he wish he had done things differently? How much did he beat himself up for not being able to think faster, act readily enough, for not being able to save Akutagawa? How many times did he wish Akutagawa would have lived– how many times did he wish he would have died in his stead. Praying and praying and praying their places could be switched.

But it's no use, because Akutagawa is gone; until he isn't. And Atsushi has been haunted by that tragic episode every day since Akutagawa died, and little does it matter that Akutagawa doesn't recognize him, he knows precisely what he has to do. He's replayed this scene countless times in his head, he knows what to be on the lookout for, he knows he has to protect Akutagawa at any cost. And when Atsushi dies for the other, he's exactly every bit as serene as Akutagawa was; because now, dying for someone he loves, he feels no regret.

[himi-wiz]

Tags. Tags are absolutely right.

Don't get me wrong I find Dark Era Dazai's still an idiot who lacks the sympathy or patience to mould someone that's obstinate amd full of rawness properly as Akutagawa but there is no way he views his apprentice as a mere tool. His whole thing is he's the one that's no longer human compared to the rest of the world that clicks together in society.

Sorry friend I know you kin Aku but you're actually wrong about what he means to Dazai. Also I wasn't joking. This is literally me pointing and going "This is what Dazai said was his reasoning for why he trained him like that." This is an example of how Dazai feared Aku would treat all his problems when he first met him. I only worded it as a joke because I'm funny like that.

[marichild]

ok i would LOVE to know more about ur interpretation of skk it sounds so based

sure anon [rubs hands] this is such an unpopular take but what the hell. so much of this was given form in dms with friends please

okay so when I say siblingcoded I absolutely do not mean I see them as siblings. it means: you know how siblings fight, and fight horribly, and get so angry with each other — only to forgive each other so easily without needing proper explanations for why you pissed each other off? when I fight with my siblings, it's loud and explosive and generally a horrible time for anyone else to be near us, yet you'll find me with my head on my sister's lap or yapping about anime with my brother the next day.

that's what skk are like — they fight and rage and whale on each other bloody but at the end of the day they'll always come back together without needing an explanation for why they did what they did. simply understanding that they managed to piss each other off and they fought but it literally doesn't matter anymore. what's the point of keeping it up? (this is especially true on chuuya’s end because he's incapable of holding proper grudges forever but dazai isn't and the way they both are about betrayal is fucking hilarious when contrasted actually).

the thing about them is that they've been falling into bed together since they were teenagers and it doesn't necessarily have anything attached to it; they understand the reasons they each do things and don't necessarily want explanations out of each other for things they know they're going to figure out eventually given time — this is most frequently highlighted in that chuuya is willing to go along with any insane plan dazai comes up with because it's dazai and he trusts that dazai will make it work somehow. dazai's never failed him where it truly matters and he does not believe that, as much as dazai annoys him, would ever purposely do anything to hurt him or endanger him.

something about bsd that I forever admire is the way asagiri handles priorities/ideals/values/loyalty/etc. vs. personal feelings for people. the thing is that the organizational divide literally does not matter to skk. dazai truly doesn't hold it against chuuya for being loyal to the pm and the same applies to chuuya about dazai and the ada. this is also why chuuya being so blatantly betrayed and furious with dazai over leaving the pm in fanon has always felt so...off, to me.

which is not to say it's not an aspect you can't play with and make fun in fanworks but as per canon chuuya really doesn't care that much the way I see it tbh. I mean — would he have been hurt and upset that dazai straight up disappeared without warning and then resurfaced working for an organization that they clash with frequently? of course. they were close in a strange way and trust doesn't negate that dazai does owe chuuya the truth. but I think it's important to remember two things:

chuuya is logical and rational, always has been, able to pick out and piece things together correctly based on even innocuous details, even as a temperemental and violent teenager (remember 15 and how he pinpointed rimbaud? or the whole of stormbringer?) which he is not anymore; his brutal physical strength doesn't negate his intelligence and ability to think logically in the face of emotions. how do you think he made it all the way to pm executive, if he were a firecracker and a liability to mori? (this is different from akutagawa who (1) brings results that are useful and substantial despite being a loose cannon (2) is mori's specialest little guy I literally have textual evidence from the manga for this that I can't get at rn bc no wifi lmao)

he fought with dazai for approximately ten minutes and then decided jt wasn't fucking worth it. this is his first appearance in the series. it is genuinely so funny to me that he was trying to play at dude who was pissed off as all hell (and of course he was, because again, dazai did just up and leave), but he knew and dazai knew that he just doesn't care that much anymore and honestly probably never did lmao.

extra third point that's more a characterization of chuuya complaint: it does irritate me that people make chuuya this angry guy swinging fists when he's literally such a chill and normal guy. the lab baby is the normalest guy in this series yall. once again he got as far as he did in the pm hierarchy for a reason 😭😭 he and dazai just revert to being 15 year olds in each other's presence but even then the difference between 15/16!skk and 22!skk is so clear in the way they interact and carry out their plans. they've both grown a lot as people. please give this to them <3 especially chuuya <3 this is also why the end of live action beast is simply not real to and ignites intense rage in me

all this to say: points to the siblingcoded point again to say. chuuya literally gets it + understands why dazai left the mafia. chuuya is one of the people closest to dazai who would've seen how the mafia environment was destroying dazai and sending him further into the pits of mental health hell — I don't think it takes a genius to realize that dazai's genuinely been better (but not entirely,) since he left.

also it's just like. chuuya understands how the mafia works and is loyal to them anyway and this is separate to his insane-trust-fall thing with dazai; he would've gotten that mori had gotten dazai's best friend killed and that dazai's other best friend had been involved in it. what does one expect dazai to do at that point? he was just eighteen years old — and don't take this as me criticizing mori PLEASE. this blog liberally blocks mori haters ♡ I am capable of nuanced thought in that direction too ♡

skk's thing is entirely separate from their loyalty to their respective organizations. they're partners who know each other the best. they know what makes the other tick. they move in sync even when it appears out of step. chuuya trusts dazai to not get him killed and dazai trusts chuuya to be able to perfectly execute his plans no matter how crazy they are because he understands chuuya the best. there are parts of them the other will never understand truly because they grew up into their current selves away from each other — and that's fine. it's truly fine, because it's not necessary for them to be eternally stuck together as a bonded-do-not-separate pair.

okay this brings me to my last point: doesn't this all sound romantic? sure. if you want it to be. but my constant thinking about skk doesn't agree. help. </3

to begin with I don't think it's cut that clearly considering (1) asagiri is very insistent on placing equal importance on everyone's relationships throughout their lives without giving them clearcut labels or placing them on a hierarchy, so to speak; connections make you who you are etc. (2) dazai is in love with everyone he's ever chosen to keep close in some odd way and it is not necessarily romantic he's just weird /aff forever (3) romance and friendship aren't mutually exclusive; they're different words for things that feel similarly but can be different if you so wish it to be. labels are descriptive not prescriptive etc. skk, to me, just happen to fall onto the side that's less romantic.

I probably have more to say but I'm running on 3 hours of sleep (again) and more caffeine than I should probably have in an attempt to trick my adhd into thinking it's working. placebos are so important....

edit: first reblog and it's already my favorite ILY KAVI LMAO

[noapendragon]

i'm going so insane over bsd 123 it needs to be studied.

(spoilers below)

first off, ueda. i don't even know why but i'm just like. attached. already. after three lines i've created a version of him in my head that could be totally inaccurate and yet it's eating my brain. the potential goes so crazy.

then atsushi. i mean my brain is constantly atsushi atsushi atsushi but now. AAAAAAA. yelling at the director, rejecting him, growing and getting over his trauma - he's doing it all and i'm so happy i can't even describe it. and there's still the attachment. THE LOOK ON HIS FACE AFTER "I'LL BE GONE. AS EARLY AS TODAY, EVEN" despite it all, despite everything he's done that's his FATHER, man. the contrast between beast atsushi who can't leave the orphanage until he breaks the watch and gets over his attachment, and canon atsushi who's getting there but he's not fully there. he's so close to being rid of him yet at the last moment he's not certain. he doesn't know if he can be without him. i.

and don't even get me started on the sskk. both getting over their trauma, and just everything akutagawa said in that chapter. thinking of ATSUSHI, not of dazai. barely reacting to his own imminent death, remembering atsushi's words.

[inamagicalhallucination]

fic where akutagawa's insults gradually turn into sarcastic "compliments" (canon) like referring to atsushi as a 'do-gooder' or 'soft' or 'overly kind' but in a mocking way but the sarcastic tone flies over atsushi's head and he assumes that theyre besties now and no matter what aku says atsushi wont be un-persuaded

[dancing-dawn]

for the character ask game: Akutagawa, since you already got an Atsushi ask~

*turns around, fluttering eyelashes*

Oh, me? Oh, no, I definitely wasn't just waiting for that name to appear in my inbox, why would you even think that, it's not like the character attached to it has already been running through my head all day every day every moment of my joyous life every fragment of my time on this earth it's not like I had this questionnaire already half prepar-

Favourite thing

Oh. This man. This man has THE MOST compelling character development in the whole series. Possibly even out of all media I've ever consumed. It is impossible to put this little fella in a box. He's Rashomoning his way out of the boundaries of any coming-from-a-13-year-old mentally deficient take on his character that tries to paint him in solid blocks of black and white. Nu-uh, my man here is a whole rainbow (also very gay but that's beside the point), he has so many nuances and flavors he might as well be a 10-course 5 Michelin star meal. He has single handedly broken EVERY SINGLE stereotype for an antagonist and even recently turned co-protagonist.

He is a marvel; he has the heart of an angel and the soul of a devil; he is flawed; he has so many damn issues; he is so fucking hot; also kinda funny ngl; he is a born protector, nourished as a murderer; he is the heartless cur with a heart on fire, burning with the the desire to live, to love, to feel, yet he CANNOT because this wretched world of pain and death and senseless duty is his damnation and you are damn right he is going to crawl his way out of this living hell, find his purpose and make this right.

Least favourite thing

Non-existent. Next question. :D

Favourite Line

“And then… And then.”

listen lisTen LIsteN i DO NOT care this is an internal thought and not spoken dialogue, okay? good. gooood good good. lemme explain myself as eloquently as i can without going insane (i am already insane ty)

This is a turning point for his whole character arc and the new beginning he so desperately needed to go on living. It is the moment of revelation, of clarity, of finding his purpose, escaping the clutches of his false deity, of reaching the light - giving into it, surrendering all of himself, wholly and truly. It is a moment of transcendence, of gazing upon the soul of his rival and seeing nothing but his own fractured reflection, of embracing all of his vices and virtues and giving them a new meaning, a new life, purpose, reason. It is acceptance and understanding and it is everything it was meant to be from the very beginning. He was meant to grow, he was meant to find love, he was meant to not only survive but to thrive, flourish. 

He was born with the most kind and gentle and caring heart, only for it to be ripped from his clutches, shattered across the corpses of his family and buried into the ground where he too belonged. But he never gave into his wretched fate, never listened to the voices, never stopped trying and trying over and over. No. He hung onto the thinnest sliver of hope for existence, seeking something that truly matters. And look just where he found it…

brOTP

Oh, I have so many here, I don’t even know where to start. So many possibilities for wholesome platonic dynamics.  

Aku & Gin - they sooooo need to interact more in canon, I love love love tragic siblings to my bones.

Beast!Aku & Kenji - I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Farmer Aku = Best Aku. Their unlikely friendship is my favourite part of Beast and you know that monologue about the world in halves, yea, that always makes me cry.

Aku & Tachihara - I got this idea from a fanfic (waiting room btw, i can never recommend this one enough) and I’m still not over it. I believe they would make for a fun duo in canon too, given the right opportunity. I sense a lot of fun brotherly protective shenanigans if Tachigin comes into the picture too tehee.

Aku & Chuuya - Chuuya is the best thing to happen to Aku in the Mafia, so that one’s pretty self explanatory. I imagine Chuuya as being very supportive and understanding, which would soothe the wound left by Dazai - for both of them, actually.

OTP

MMMMmmmmmm yea I can’t really make the same joke twice, gets old, gotta think of a new one, ahem…

A boy with righteous soul,

with the most heroic goal -

to bring the world to light,

meets the deadliest of plight.

A soul with no compassion,

in a savage, brutal fashion.

With destiny of bone and blood,

to wither, crawl into the mud.

Until he found a strength reborn,

in this world dark, forlorn.

In the eyes of fated partner

who turned to fallen martyr.

He cried out, born of fire,

with a need so raw and dire,

to reverse the flow of time,

and return that which was mine.

He swore to take him back,

for the boy became his heart,

his hope and reason, fate,

to survive another day.

Until their destined meeting,

in a world lone and fleeting.

Where he needn’t fight alone,

as he found his mirrored soul.

…ye, it’s sskk, big surprise here <3 (yes i wrote that in an hour literally only for the sole purpose of not repeating the jest from the Atsushi one yes)

nOTP

Okay after spilling my heart out in every possible shape and form of poetic ramblings about what I love, it’s a bit hard for me to discuss that which I do not. But it’s Akuhigu, of course, simple as that. It’s not even because “oh it gets into the way of sskk bla bla bla,” no - it’s just genuinely plainly unhealthy as it is even on its own. I feel bad for Higuchi (even tho I accept her role as a character as a reference to irl!Akutagawa’s work) and I’m always going to pray that someday she gets the spotlight she deserves, preferably aside from being a manifestation of Akutagawa’s shadow.

Random headcanon

He has the biggest collection of expensive tea and is soooo judging Atsushi for drinking the cheap supermarket stuff and daring to call that muddied water tea. He also has regular ‘tea dates’ with Gin where they chill with a book and a cup in hand and argue on their favourite flavors.

Unpopular opinion

*cough* bottom aku *cough cough cough* if u know me, u know *faints dramatically to reinforce my statement*

Song I associate with them

Ye, you can blame @gothicmatter again for this one - absolutely and definitely and certainly “Sacrifice” by London After Midnight. I have this shit ingrained in my brain and it is not etching itself out anytime soon. I still listen to it at least once every few days.

Especially the verse…

Darkness is all I want to see

I could never put in to words

What it is you mean to me

is spinning in my head like the Cosmo Clock at all times.

Favourite picture

Oh. Oh, this is where we get um,, how do I say it… a bit unhinged.

HAVE YOU SEEN THOSE MAN’S THIGHS OH MY GOD LOOK AT HIM FFS HOW DARE HE I CANNOT EVEN TAKE HIM DYING SERIOUSLY WITH THIS LITTLE CUNTY SLICK TO HIS BODY OUTFIT. BRO, ATSUSHI, MY MAN, IF YOU WILL NOT, THEN I WILL.

EXCUSE ME UMM WHO DO YOU THINK GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO LOOK LIKE THIS WHILE GETTING STABBED MY DUDE I AM TRYING MY HARDEST TO PAY ATTENTION TO THE PLOT HERE YOU CANNOT JUST PULL THAT FACE WITH BLOOD SMEARED ACROSS YOUR CHEEK AND LIPS AND TEETH AND EXPECT ME NOT TO BO-

[fawncherries]

to know each other is to know oneself

shin soukoku

2 chapters, ongoing

post-canon, mission-turned-vacation, ability issues

“I saw it,” the weretiger says, quiet. His eyes are closed when Akutagawa turns back, bandages clasped in his hands and gripping so tightly he can feel the gauze rubbing against his skin. “I saw all of it, Akutagawa.” “What are you rabbiting on about now?” Akutagawa asks quietly, breathlessly. He sinks back to his knees, in front of the weretiger, and begins his process of wrapping his torso. “What did you see?” The weretiger snaps his eyes open, tilting his head. “Do you know what is before the core of amenogozen?” “I was not gifted enough to be in attendance.”

or: atsushi loses control of his ability and the logical solution is to go on a trip with the guy who you just had some weird mutual life saving experience with, right? (ft. dazai scheming, a little bit of patching up, some very weird sskk conversations and general domestic fluff-ish)

🔗 read on ao3

[nihilo-sensei]

Stray Thoughts on Bungo Stray Dogs: 55 Minutes [SPOILERS]

I just finished the amazing 55 Minutes light novel. These are some thoughts I occasionally typed out as I was reading.

(If you haven't read the novel this is all going to sound batshit.)

Casually admitting to breaking into the weather bureau because a weather report was wrong is a top-10 Kunikida moment.

Dazai giggling in trash cans reminds me of the laughing honey pot from the "Heffalumps and Woozles" sequence in Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day.

Poor Atsushi bombing at improv in front of the thieves while trying to stall for Kunikida to show up.

Okay, so we can add "Watched everything I know and love perish before dying myself in an earlier timeline, having the memory imprinted on my present self, and redoing an investigation from the beginning with a new ulterior goal with millions of lives hanging in the balance" to Atsushi's extensive list of traumas.

Kunikida puts just as much faith in Dazai as Atsushi does.

Atsushi taking the time to scare Dazai is such a little brother move.

Dazai immediately getting Atsushi back is such a big brother move.

Oh my god, Atsushi and Akutagawa died together in the other timeline! And now this timeline's SSKK are imprinted-memories-of-a-localized-apocalypse buddies! I can totally be normal about that. Maybe.

Oh good, Atsushi gets to embarrass himself twice when dealing with the thieves. At least he handled it well the second time around.

Jesus, how much pudding did Dazai force-feed a guy for it to qualify as torture?

Nice to know that canon!Atsushi and (presumably) BEAST!Atsushi share stealth skills. Makes sense. They both snuck into the kitchen to make themselves a decent meal at an orphanage that would beat them for just breathing.

Confirmation that Atsushi is "covered in scars" beyond the two burns on his torso, meaning that he only recently inherited the tiger's powers of regeneration.

Higuchi celebrating getting a compliment from Akutagawa is adorable.

I love watching Atsushi grow as an actual detective. It's easy to miss because he's often around Dazai and Ranpo, but I've always maintained that he's pretty smart in his own right. He figures a lot of things out for himself.

Kunikida heading the "How to save Dazai if he dies" committee is very sweet.

It's funny how the easiest way to get SSKK to get along in the early days was for a villain to suggest that they could get along.

"Finish it. Bring him peace." Damn, Aku.

That last bit with Wells… Fuck.