#aka idk how tumblr works anymore

[pxlution]

pirate lewis 🏴‍☠️

[ominous-feychild]

✦ Writer Questionnaire 2 ✦

Thanks for the tag, @the-golden-comet! (And @the-letterbox-archives tagging me when I was almost done here, haha)

Heads-up! Long post!

How long have you had your writing Tumblr/Writeblr? A fast and loose estimate is fine!

Two months ago to the date actually??? Or, at least, that's when I first uploaded a story here. My first actual Writeblr post was me hopping in on an open tag on the 6th of June, haha. I thought it was just a month, but looks like the summer's gone by in a flash! 😭

What led you to create it?

So, I'm a writer on Tapas! I'd been attempting to social network on other social medias (twitter and bluesky) but wasn't getting anywhere, didn't like the general formats, and uh... I'm sure I don't have to explain why I don't want to touch Twitter with a 10-foot-pole anymore. Let's just say, if you haven't seen, it's just as bad as (if not worse than) everyone says. Anyhow, I'd seen lots of Tumblr short stories on other platforms and started investigating what it's like here. Didn't know what "Writeblr" was or that it even existed, but eventually stumbled into the field after posting my short story. Thanks, @darkandstormydolls! ❤️

What’s your favorite thing about the Writeblr community?

How supportive everyone is??? Like omg you guys are so sweet, idk how to take it. Also I love seeing how much passion everyone else has for their writing, haha.

What’s one thing you’d like your mutuals to know about you?

Uhhhh, I think I'm pretty open about the things I'd like people to know about me, haha. I never mean to offend, so if I accidentally say something wrong, please tell me! I'm autistic and very dumb.

Is there anything you’d like to see more of on your dash?

I'm ngl I keep meaning to build out my followed tags for my fandoms, haha. The only fandoms I really see things for are TMAGP (10/10, TMA is my obsession. I am obsessed. It is one of my Special Interests and I love it with all my heart) and House of the Dragon??? Except I'm not even a fan of HotD??? So that's kinda annoying, haha. (Aka, my fandom stuff, but that's on me.)

WIP it Good

Which Works-in-Progress (WIPs) or writing projects are you noodling about, lately?

Rising From the Ashes, tragically. (Because it's one of the LAST things I should be working on right now, haha.) Otherwise, I'm of course always obsessed with the Arcane Rifts. Then I force myself to be obsessed with Sun and Shadow, though it's slowly growing on me, haha.

How long have you been working on them?

Haha, so I've historically jumped around a lot in working on different things, so these are approximate guesstimations!

Rising From the Ashes has likely had 3 or 4 years put into it/the characters. If you include the Calamity Crew (which overlaps with it in the timeline and originally ended up merging with the cast of RFtA), I'd say definitely 4 years!

The Arcane Rifts has had 5 years put into it.

Sun and Shadow is very new; I'd say it probably only has about 4 months of work in it? It's part of why I'm less interested in it, haha. Less I've put into it and less I'm attached to.

Do you remember what inspired them/what got you started?

Oh... oh dear. How could you ask me this??? 😭😭😭

Rising From the Ashes has existed since, I think, 2016. It started (tragically) as an RP starter on Google+. I wish I was kidding.

To those unaware of how it worked in that space (and likely similar ones to this day), you'd post a starter and people would join in with their own characters. 99% of the time, they'd drop out before long. However, I'd work out details of the characters in the process and carry that info over into the worldbuilding. I eventually stopped RPing with the masses and settled down with a single "partner" who I'll call Kris.

She's the one who stole my docs.

The Arcane Rifts technically originated as another RP starter? It never got attention, though, and instead my ideas for it simply carried over into the worldbuilding in general.

One of the characters of the original starter was important in the worldbuilding. It was not a character you see in the early books of tAR, though, so don't bother trying to figure it out. But, since he was so important, his origins were also important.

The Arcane Rifts started in 2019, as I wanted to make a story building out said character's origins. It was originally going to be a duology, the first book being Gene's backstory and the second being how Gene and The Other Guy's lives intertwined. (No, they were not gay for each other! 😂) It's since changed a lot, and focuses basically exclusively on Gene, haha. The last book in the series will probably be focused on the other character, though!

Sun and Shadow started for a romance novel competition on Tapas which has since ended. I didn't get to finish it in time for a lot of reasons, but I primarily cite stress and exhaustion from working full time at a physically-intensive job. It grew shockingly quickly and I had some fans donate to me related to it, so I'm kinda forced to work on it, haha. Dw--I like it! It's just harder to work on for a number of reasons, haha.

How much time, in your best estimation, do you spend thinking about them?

Tragic, the questions you're asking me--

It depends, haha. I'm autistic and hyperfixate a lot. Also, for one, that's a suuuuuper vague question??? Like what do you mean "how much time"--how much time within the day? How often in general? Idk, man, haha.

I think about the Arcane Rifts a LOT!

I've put an incredible amount of time and effort into it, and I'm in love with 90% of the characters there. Even the background characters have had a lot of work put into them, getting relatively fleshed-out backstories to make their motives understandable (even if not agreeable!), and I love them all so much, haha.

Except Katerina. She's a bitch.

I also think about Rising From the Ashes a good amount, and it's invaded my brain again lately, haha.

I took a step away from RFtA and basically all of my other stories late 2021 when Kris (my ex-writing partner) and I had a falling out. It was incredibly difficult for me emotionally to look at anything I worked with her on, and obviously RFtA was a huge one (actually, tAR was the only thing of my early works she had nothing to do with). Since early this year, I've finally been able to work on it again and it's been incredibly fun removing her stuff, actually!

I think all that is a good part of why I keep randomly getting obsessed with it again, haha. It's like looking at old friends (the characters, not Kris) and being all "omg??? I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN FOREVER??? PLEASE TELL ME EVERYTHING YOU'VE BEEN UP TO!!!" except it's removing Kris's stuff, haha.

I think about Sun and Shadow a lot more than you might expect with how much I talk about not preferring it, haha. I love the characters! Crow and, actually, Valyarus especially. They're both super interesting characters, and I'll randomly find my brain working out scenes between characters interacting with them.

(The problem with SaS is that, as a book, it's incredibly different from my usual works. It's a small cast of Frey/Crow and technically Daleira, while most of my stories focus on larger casts. It makes for a VERY different experience, and so it's a lot harder to work on)

When someone asks the dreaded, “What do you write about,” question, what do you usually say?

Actually, I've got a ready answer for this one! Until SaS, I was dedicating my time to the Arcane Rifts and had prepared the answer:

Percy Jackson meets Lord of the Rings in a steampunk fantasy world full of ���mysteries waiting to be uncovered✨

(I'd say the "mysteries waiting to be uncovered" part ironically/accidentally mockingly most of the time, whoops, haha. I always feel awkward advertising my works.)

It was awkward when people would get actually interested in it from there and ask more questions, haha.

To clarify: that's my tagline for the Arcane Rifts! The story has gods and demigods messing with mortals, using them as their playthings and being REALLY immature babies because they don't really face consequences for their actions like PJ. Then, it's a lot more "grounded yet fantastical" like LotR, where magic is kinda infused with reality and yet you still have issues like starving to death and whatnot.

Let’s Rotate Blorbos

Name any characters you created.  Side characters, protagonists, antagonists, characters who’ve never been written, the first original abomination you ever pulled from your ass; whomever you’d like!

UHHHH THERE'S A LOT TO LIST???

Try this for a taste! These are just the guys I've gotten colors for!

Freya, Crow, Daleira, Valyarus, Grimnir, Soren, Gene, Tazin, Mislav, Adilzhan, Ludmila, Rada, Caspar, Nikolai, Gennadi, Oska, Rieka, Liesel, Carmin, Nora, Sammy, Kieva, Caron, Varik, Elazi, Riaan, Roman, and Tiberius! (Though Tib is getting a name change sooner or later)

Who’s the most unhinged?

Unhinged in which way? There's a lot of options there, haha.

I'm going to give honorary mentions to Valyarus, Gene in the later books, Tazin, Rieka, Gennadi, and Tiberius ! (Why does it not surprise me that most unhinged characters are from tAR? 🤣 Also I swear it's a coincidence most of the unhinged characters are red.)

(... Probably.)

In general, I'd say that, incredibly ironically, the Existence of Order is the most unhinged of all my characters. She's just incredible at hiding it.

(Tbf half of the Existentials probably belong on the "unhinged" list anyway but eh. They still don't compare to Order!)

Who comes the most naturally for you to write?

I'm going to give this as a tie between Gene and Sammy!

Gene has my 'tisms and just about all of my trauma, so we have a lot in common, whoops, haha. Also there's a... very specific detail about his character that makes him easier to write in general. It's just a major spoiler. 👀

Similarly and actually identically to Gene in some ways, while Sammy has a lot in common with me, he's also incredibly perceptive! (Although we don't share that fact.)

Due to the way I write, their analytical natures allow for them to spit straight facts about the worldbuilding and the people around them rather than beating around the bush, haha. Both are highly investigative, try to learn and understand everything around them, and notice small details other characters wouldn't! It makes it much easier for me to write, because uh... well here's an example of what my outlines look like.

Long story short: I include a lot of detail which I then transfer into the POV's character narration, cutting out details which they wouldn't notice or think about, haha. In Sammy's case (which that scene has Sammy as the narrator/POV character), very little information gets cut out because he's so perceptive!

(Here, as a treat--have another example!)

(In this scene, Nikolai is the narrator. Even the outline gets "filtered" to mirror the characters' way of thinking--like it's Nikolai himself seeing Caspar as "doll-like". The crossed-out stuff is details I most likely won't mention, but noted for myself, haha. I do the same thing if/when including details about the motives and thoughts of non-narrator characters.)

Do you ever cringe at them?

Gene and Sammy?

A B S O L U T E L Y .

Gene is a wreck in basically every way and desperately needs help (that he won't get until he meets Dimitry). As much as I love him, there's a lot of moments where you just can't help but wince and be all "shit, did you REALLY have to do/say that?"

Sammy on the other hand? He's a terrified, control freak manipulator who panics the moment he feels like he's losing control of a situation. It can be painful to watch, even if simultaneously fascinating.

How much control do you feel you have over your characters?  AKA, do they ever “write themselves,” refuse to cooperate, or do things you didn’t expect? To what degree? Are some less cooperative than others?

I explicitly go out of my way to add backstory to and develop each and every one of my characters until they "write themselves", haha.

I want my characters to feel like real people, so I do my absolute best to make them as real as possible. (That's part of why tAR is so massive...)

Special shoutout to Dimitry here, btw. Dude COMPLETELY screwed over the planned and intended from the earliest days path of the Arcane Rifts. I've mentioned before that Gene is villain-coded, yeah? Want to know why?

Because he was MEANT to be one! Then Dimitry had to come along, be the sweetest, nicest fucking person around to Gene while he was going through the worst part of his life, and keep Gene from slipping off the deep end!

MITRY, YOU PIECE OF--

Do you enjoy people asking questions about your characters? And do you have a preferred means of receiving said questions? For example, as Asks, as replies, as reblogs, as tag notes, as comments on AO3, etc.

I absolutely love, love, love!!! people asking questions about my characters!!! 🥰

I would absolutely prefer them as Asks sent to me, and especially would prefer if separate subjects/questions were sent in separate Asks! Like, say you were going to ask me about Gene and Dimitry. I'd rather two separate Asks, one asking for whatever you wanted to know about Gene and another for whatever you wanted to know about Dimitry, haha. However, if you wanted to ask a single question about both, that obviously is fine as a single Ask!

On writeblr engagement

What makes you want to follow another Writeblr account? Do you follow ‘em as you see ‘em, or take time scoping out the blog to make sure you align with its content? Do you follow based on WIPs, or vibes?

I definitely scope out before I follow, yes.

I choose based primarily on the personality of the person behind the blog, but the WIPs/vibes can also have an influence on my decision, haha. I'd rather follow people with kind/supportive personalities, and I'll eventually start liking their stories even if they're not initially my thing!

What makes you decide against following?

Bigotry. Moment I see it, I'm on the lookout for even the slightest hint of more and, if I see it, I'm OUT!

(That includes things like: homophobia, transphobia, TERFs, ableism, racism, xenophobia, etc.)

Also, while I include angst in my stories, the people who are big on "I have nothing but bad stuff in my writing and I'm proud" are, uh... not on my "follow" list. While they can write what they want and enjoy it, grimdark is not my thing. Angst is best in moderation and I very purposely control the amount of it in my life.

(Also Kris's--my ex writing partner's--obsession with "grimdark-ness" is a good part of why I'm so ecstatic to remove her stuff from my writing. Yes, I've tried it. For years. I hated it. Please and thank you. Also note that I proudly call myself an evil writer, so it's not like I don't love angst, it's just--moderation. Seriously.)

Do you interact with non-mutuals often?

Yes! I think a good 50-30% of my interactions are with non-moots, haha. I go out of my way to try to support my moots, but I'll definitely share support with anything that catches my attention, no matter who it's from!

To be fair, though, I think a majority of non-moots I interact with are on my mental "probably going to follow soon" list. I can be slow to make decisions, haha. It doesn't help that I try being active with my moots, so I'm trying to avoid growing that list too quickly!

Do your mutuals’ characters occupy space in your noodle?

Haha, depends what you mean by that? My brain is definitely too full of my own characters to have any space for anyone else's, but I definitely do think of others' characters at times! There's plenty of y'alls characters I really like, haha.

Just... omg, my hyperfixated AuDHD brain refuses to focus on anything except for the Hyperfixation of the Moment™.

This was a huge one! Hopefully I'm not screaming into the void with this one, or you guys enjoy finding out more about me and my WIPs.

If you're curious about the reason this is labeled Writer Questionnaire 2... well guess what!

Tagging (gently! This is a lot, haha): @honeybewrites @yourpenpaldee @paeliae-occasionally @mysticstarlightduck @illarian-rambling @.darkandstormydolls (tagged you earlier in the post haha) + open tags!

Divider from @cafekitsune!

[randomalistic]

Anyways here’s a rambling infodump thing about all the similarities between Spamton and Turbo and then some. (you should bully me for this)

My fixation on both of them… they feed into eachother.

3 foot tall FREAK !!!!!

THE INSANE SMILER…

Glitchy and pixelated

Full of envy, pent up hatred, DESPERATELY CRAVES REVENGE.

Kinda ugly </3

Or at least. Unconventional!

Used to drive a car when he was popular

I know there’s a difference between being a car spokesman and being a racer but it’s close enough <3 Spamton would not know how to drive a cungadero they just told him to pose in there and smile. Ok Headcanon OVER !!!!

Had it all in the 80s/90s before losing the spotlight

Turbo did his bullshit in 1987 (actual road blasters release year) and Spamton did his bullshit in 1997

Only really known as an unspeakable rumor and lives in infamy

It’s more like everyone “moved on” from Spamton and forgot about him (or at least tried to forget about him…) where with Turbo what he did was so bad that he’s only known for that ONE thing

Goes in hiding for decades

Spamton has his alleyway dumpster, and maybe other areas of cyber city with low traffic. Turbo’s hiding was implied to have been in the depths of game central station until Sugar Rush was plugged in. (Which I think was asked about in an AMA) Both are like. ~30 YEARS of hiding 💀

Would go any length for the same attention again

The interesting thing about this is Turbo DOES win. He does get that attention back by disguising as King Candy and being able to race again, and he keeps it for however long Sugar Rush was around for before the events of the movie. Spamton never gets it back…

But at least Spamton doesn’t get INCINERATED so I’d say he’s better off, even if the best outcome is him becoming an item

Dependent on some kid for his plan to work

Although Spamton’s relationship with Kris (dependent on them helping him) is pretty different than King Candy’s relationship with Vanellope (dependent on her not interfering) I still think it’s funny that they both have beef with children

Later attempted murder of said kid

Quality villains out here not even hesitating to kill kids to get what they want !!!

Imitated/fabricated identity

Spamton imitates Swatch, Turbo fabricates (?) King Candy

Stupid catchphrase

NOW’S YOUR CHANCE TO BE [TurboTastic!]

BOSS BATTLE FORM IS FUCKKKKED

They essentially have the same monologue of “THANKS TO YOU I'M MORE POWERFUL THAN EVER!! But it's not enough... so I'm going to kill you anyways"

I think King Candybug’s Face resembles SNEO in a weird way. Mostly just the big eyes and weird nose and THE SMILERRRRR. They have very similar vibes! I will stop myself now!

Virus/malware adiacent

Turbo literally claims he’s a virus by the end of the movie and Spamton is Spamton

Critically Acclaimed Tumblr Man (and hated)

From my RESEARCH. (Aka. Looking up art of him) Apparently a lot of people on tumblr liked Turbo in 2013. And those people have since become spamton people (perhaps ……) I guess that is me now too. Really unfortunate

Lore ties into a real life video game (Petz & Road Blasters)

In the sweepstakes spamton was kinda confirmed to come from a Petz game. I also didn’t know road blasters was Real until I started looking into it . (TurboTime is fake tho) But there’s a very specific similarity for you. Fucked up characters blurring the lines into real life my beloved

Rivalry/broken friendship with Those similar looking fellas (I’m running out of brain power here)

Spamton had the Addisons, which were like his friends? Fellow advertisers. Looked a bit like him, just taller with different colors. Spamton left them after becoming a big shot because he thought he didn’t need them anymore…

Turbo had the “turbo twins” (the 2 other blue racers in his game) idk if that’s their official name cuz they kinda barely exist in canon.. I think it’s popular fanon that Turbo is shorter than both of them, but that’s actually not true. But I’m still gonna count it. Anyways he KILLED them when he got turbotime unplugged. THEYRE DEAD.

Extreme temperature related death (is this a stretch)

Less of a similarity and more of an interesting contrast

Turbo burns to death when he’s INCINERATED in diet cola mountain. I could ramble about this a lot but. That’s for my second account

And Spamton NEO (in snowgrave at least) is FROZEN SOLID by noelle. He shouldn’t have asked for that ice cream man

Anyways I get similar vibes from those guys..

I hope they explode.

Also thinking more about this is making me realize how similar in concept deltarune and Wreck it Ralph are. As in, those apps and computer programs in the computer lab ? Yeah they’re alive and theres a whole ass cyber city and mansion and theres a ton of little guys living in there! (And same goes for the card kingdom in chapter 1)

Like if there was a dark world created in an arcade, it would probably look something like the WIR world. In a way, lightners would be the “players” because everything the game characters (darkners) do is to serve the players. I’m just saying !!!! These pieces of media are both Really Good!!!

[tigertofu]

ok i've been chipping away at this Thing for a long time and i think it's finally ready to be vomitted out into the internet. without further ado, here is my

Stupid-Long List of Trevor Headcanons

divided into chronological sections !

((the NSFW shit is hiding at the bottom))

CW's for: mentions of drugs/alcohol, addiction, cannibalism, violence, gross sex stuff. typical Trevor things

and heres a gif of him cuz ig thats the tumblr thing to do idk i never made one of these lists b4 :x

the past

• he's a scorpio and the reason he has a scorpion tat on his hand is bc he's like. very mildly into horoscopes. he was born some time in november

• he doesn't have a middle name cuz his mom didn't give enough of a shit to give him one

• despite playing hockey and golf as a kid, he was never really that into the sports themselves. he only did hockey because he saw it as a way to beat up other children and not get reprimanded for it, and he did both in the hopes of being good enough at something to earn his mother's praise for once (it did not work :()

• hates his dad bc of how he treated his mom and is glad he abandoned him at that shopping mall when he was a kid

• he (w/ Brad's help) would play "pranks" on (aka BULLY) poor Lester during the north yankton days. some fav pastimes included (but were not limited to): pantsing him, hiding his walking cane, and replacing his asthma medication with laughing gas

• was highkey jealous of how easy Michael could get girls during the north yankton days. when he actually was able to convince a girl to come back home with him, he would make sure to be loud as hell about it so that Mike would know he wasn't the only one getting chicks

• all of his hand tats and a lot of his other tats were done in prison, even tho he was only in for like 6 months

• prison was a mixed bag for him. on one hand, anal. on the other, having to restrain himself from arguments and physical altercations so he could get out early on good behavior

• went thru a breakdancing phase in the 90's (i THINK this one might be canon. idk. could've sworn i've heard him try to tell Lamar this in an attempt to impress him. pls feel free to prove me wrong or right)

• one of the scars on his eyebrows is actually the result of getting a fresh eyebrow piercing ripped tf out during a barfight in the 00's. prob for the best that it was cuz we all know that shit wouldve ended up getting infected and rejecting out of his face anyways

• he moved to Sandy Shores not just because it's nice and isolated, but because it was the place most opposite of north yankton he could think of. never any snow. he absolutely fucking hates cold weather and snow because it reminds him of a certain bank heist that happened in '04

• between Ron, Chef, and Wade, Chef was the first one he met after moving to Sandy Shores. they used to cook meth together in a trailer out in the desert (another one that i THINK is canon but im not sure idk. it all blurs together, idk whats canon and whats not anymore, my brain is too rotted from spinning Trevor around in it like the world's most dried out little shriveled husk of a rotisserie chicken for the past three years, the fog is coming, yk how it is)

• he acquired Liquor Ace the same way he "acquired" the Vanilla Unicorn. the previous owner just mysteriously disappeared one day. nobody in Sandy Shores cared tho once word got around that the new owner was gonna start cooking crystal in the upstairs and selling it

• yk how in the game he said that his heart momentarily stopped once cuz he put an axe thru a power cable? he did that cuz the power had gone out in the middle of him watching an Impotent Rage episode he hadn't seen yet. for some reason (was prob very high and very angry) he thought that he could bring the power back by hitting the sparking wire with an axe. it didnt work. he smelled like overcooked bacon for a week afterwards. he enjoyed that part tho

the present

• he makes Ron cut his hair with a pair of rusty kitchen scissors when he needs a trim. he used to go to the nice barber lady in Sandy Shores but got banned after loudly moaning about how good her nails felt on his scalp once

• once smoked an entire cigarette in one long inhale. Wade witnessed this and found it extremely impressive

• he'll eat pretty much anything but he especially likes foods with strong flavors. salty, sour, super sweet, spicy, etc cuz his taste buds are SHOT from the years of smoking/drug abuse. he abuses condiments, especially hot sauce

• thinks that any restaurant that doesn't have a drive-thru is a "fancy" restaurant

• LOVES candy cuz the meth has given him a major sweet tooth, but prefers anything with chocolate over fruity/gummy candies

• has a weird fascination with eating raw meat.....of any kind. except for sushi. he thinks sushi is "fancy prissy city people food"

• also has a weird fascination with making stews/soups similar to the eyelid one that he tries to feed Michael in that one cutscene. it's the only type of food he knows how to cook. may be a comfort thing for him because microwaving a bowl of canned soup was the most effort his mother ever put into making a meal for him when he was a kid. and she did it like, twice, maybe. he for sure remembers both times very clearly tho and considers them to be some of his fondest memories

• will go for days without eating anything solid before finally sitting down and consuming enough food to feed a family of 5. sometimes he just like. forgets that eating is necessary for survival

• can open beer bottles with his teeth. between that and the meth habit, its an absolute miracle he still has all his teeth

• go-to pizza order is a large meat lover's. he tries to make vaguely sexual passes about "loving large meat" at the poor pizza delivery guys every time he orders delivery. does not tip, but will say shit like "hey, if you come inside i've got a little tip for ya" while the delivery guy quickly vacates the premises

• honestly? i think there is a good 50/50 chance on whether or not he is ACTUALLY a cannibal. maybe he posters as one cuz he likes the reactions it incites, maybe he genuinely enjoys the psychosexual intimacy of consuming the flesh of another human being........ who knows !! not knowing is half the fun :)

• ok ok hear me out u know that stupid tiktok sound that was going around a couple years ago that goes "hi my name is carmen winstead -- HAAAAAHHHGGCHH" ??? look it up if u don't cuz that's what his snoring sounds like. the fucking "HAAAAAHHHGGCHH"

• once he's asleep he is out like a fucking light. guy could sleep thru nuclear war

• is not opposed to drinking hand sanitizer when out of other sources of alcohol. it tastes just like the shitty moonshine Ron makes in his backyard anyways and gets him even drunker so why not !

• hates horror films bc they make him angry. at least, any of the ones where somebody survives at the end. thinks the murderers in them are stupid. starts yelling shit at the TV like "HE'S GETTING AWAY YOU STUPID FUCK,, WHAT ARE YOU DOING !!!!"

• believes baby pink and orange are "his colors"

• will sit on his sofa or bed and try to shoot any cockroaches scurrying around his place with a pistol for funsies when bored sometimes

• enjoys playing darts at the Yellow Jack with anyone who'll play him but absolutely fucking sucks at it cuz of his shaky hands. accidentally threw a dart into another bar patron's head once. will rage and insist his opponent cheated when he loses. will then get physical if anyone tries to tell him its impossible to cheat at darts. is much less of a sore loser when playing with Mike, Frank, or Lamar tho he will still grumble about losing for up to hours on end afterwards

• is an illegal immigrant bc he never became a US citizen. does not own an actual ID, but has several fakes lying around, all with fake birth dates and fake names that are wildly varying levels of believable

• will absolutely flip his fucking lid if Wade comes around him while wearing Juggalo face paint

• speaking of Wade. yk how he has a shitty tattoo of his own name on his arm? (at least i think he does. i tried looking to see if he does and i couldnt tell so now im unsure if thats just yet another detail that my brain completely made up or smth that i actually saw). ANYWAYS, Trevor gave it to him (stick n poke. it was a longggg process but Wade didnt mind too much cuz he was high at the time and consented to it beforehands anyways) when Trevor first "took him in" cuz he kept forgetting his name and got tired of referring to him as "Hey, you" (which Wade did not respond to most of the time anyways)

• is an ugly crier. like, a butt-ugly crier. snot, drooling, wailing, red face, the whole nine yards and he is loud as hell about it too

• loves back rubs cuz ofc he does he's an old man. often makes Ron or Wade give him massages

• his boomer-ass super-zoomed-in LifeInvader profile pic was taken by Ron. it took them a dozen tries before they got it

nsfw

• he sucks at eating out.........kinda? but what he lacks in precision and consistency he makes up for with sheer (sloppy. slobbery) passion. and endurance. can stay down there (and will, if you let him) for hours

• is not much better at blowing. "accidentally" uses too much teeth every time

• ~4 inches. MAYBE 4.5. good girth tho. not cut

• has a thing for chubby/thicc ppl

• is a biter and won't ask before biting so uhh watch out ! part of the reason for the above is bc there's more to bite

• loooooves loves loves to suck on things. fingers, necks, tits, dicks, anything. also looooooves having it reciprocated. particularly likes shoving his fingers in your mouth

• loves to involve mouths as much as possible. spitting/being spat on, the aforementioned biting as well as being bitten, eating food off of your body or having food eaten off of him, the type of makeout sessions that involve shoving each other's tongues down each other's throats.. anything that involves mouths and/or the motions of eating drives him fucking wild

• will beg you even when not explicitly told to when he's not feeling dominant. will beg and beg and beg and beg and it's hot but can also quickly become incredibly annoying

• but he LOVES to be annoying on purpose too. via the begging, or by teasing/edging, mocking, etc. loves to get a rise out of you and loves the attention (even if negative.. ESPECIALLY if negative) it gets him

• occasionally cries after sex. will expect you to hold him while he does. will start to angry cry and say you don't actually love him if you refuse

• now ik this one is nothing groundbreaking and seems to already be the general consensus amongst the Trevor enjoyers but im gonna say it anyways. he def has a thing for public/semi-public sex. be careful about sitting next to him while in any public space. he WILL try to touch on you and it WILL be in a way that makes it obvious to everyone in the immediate vicinity what's going on. does he do it on purpose as an exhibition thing? maybe...... does he genuinely think he's being slick about it? also maybe. if ur with him, expect to be banned from multiple establishments

• lowkey has a breeding kink in the sense that he loves to finish inside (not just bc it feels nice but also bc of the intimacy of it) and thinks that pregnant women are hot as hell

• is most likely infertile due to the years of meth use tho

• loves to both overstimulate and be overstimulated. just bc you've both climaxed doesnt mean he wont keep going for god-knows-how-long

..................andd that's all she (i) wrote. ty for reading !! i've got more shit to say about Trevor cuz ofc i do but this is already like 2k words so if u wanna hear my headcanons on anything specific at all,, pls do throw it in my ask box ! <33

[spampai]

Struggle.

Mine, Aka Spampai/Clsketches

…

Sigh.

Thoughts again. I know people will probably skim thru this, but I don’t have the heart to care right now. I’m sharing because I trust you. I’m aware of the dangers of the internet and how they can use to manipulate, but I just don’t care right now.

I don’t really care if this gets 1039390384 notes or less than 10, and I don’t care what time I’m posting this, because apparently now it’s the dead hour ‘til nighttime, but I don’t have the patience to wait.

I’ll place an image of Bitty because I don’t like false hashtags and I relate to him in some way. Favorite character, is all.

Everytime I boot up Tumblr, my expectations boost up to the max, expecting notifications, feedback, reblogs, likes, comments. I see none. I leave quickly with a frown.

It also happened on Instagram; it’s just the same thing happening all over again in Tumblr.

In my last post on a ramble, everyone convinced that it takes time, which of course, is true. But I always find a way to come back to this occurrence, and I can’t take that thought away. What’s happening?

Are the artists not reblogging because of poor quality? Is it because I have poor management on when to post? Is my hashtags outdated? Is it because the content I’ve posted is dead?

Or is it the luck? People tend to base their account out of luck of people, big artists, communities, to find, like, reblog, comment. I’ve rarely got that, and whenever it’s about them, I get more likes.

Am I like-driven in some way? I don’t know.

Am I promoting the manga way too much? I don’t know?

Is it spam content? I don’t know.

Does my content stand above the rest? I don’t know.

Do I post too often or too less? I don’t know.

Is my account worth to reblog on? Art-wise? Comment-wise? I don’t know.

I just don’t know.

I don’t know anything.

Too much questions, too much.

My brain can’t think. My heart can’t feel.

They can’t cooperate and work together.

All the brain does is overthink; the heart mourn, carrying more burden everyday.

Even if I did take a break, it’ll never stop my pursue for more feedback. The only thing I ask myself to do is to stay positive, commit to my goals and be happy, but I think it’s wearing off over time, slowly.

…

I’ll just see u in my next post.

Thanks for everyone who commented in my last ramble. It helped, and I hope I can see more someday. Whenever that is.

Thanks to all the artists who convinced me to stay here; idk if any of u are reading this but love ya and keep the positivity.

Support my manga, reblogging if u like it or smth. I need it. Physically and mentally. Use #Talk Your Way Out! Or smth I don’t know anymore on how the algorithm works. I don’t know if the upcoming chapters will receive as much, but idk. Idk if this counts as more spam promoting.

Part 1:

Part 2:

I’ll just add this. I’ll be working on Part 3 now, ‘cause I spend way too much time on this post. See you.

[hellorosie]

unremarkable loser back from fucking off!

aka i made a tumblr again after like half a decade away from it... anyways, idk how this shit works anymore but i am looking for more mutuals/ppl to follow in gen sooo!

hazbin hotel and helluva boss enjoyers (over the age of 18 please & ty) feel free to int 👾 and i'll follow u !!

[coridallasmultipass]

brocal for the ship bingo?

The OTP to end all other OTPs... (Man. This wound up being basically Cori's Masterpost of BroCal. AKA... this got long and has some images, since I realized I can post my own art directly instead of just a text link to it lol.)

Wasn't actually expecting this to wind up with a bingo? But I got basically 2?? (Will explain the lighter heart later.) This is A LONG post, and definitely gonna get SUGGESTIVE, bc man, am I obSESSED with BroCal. I'm just gonna go thru each checked box, since I don't know how else to structure this post lol.

Read More to save ppl's dashboards:

I want them to make out with blood: OKAY. I HAVE A WHOLE THING PLANNED FOR THIS CONCEPT. I AM NOT GOING TO GO INTO DETAIL ABOUT IT JUST YET BC I ACTUALLY WANNA WRITE IT. I'm obsessed with this one fanart of Bro licking Lil Cal, and it spurred on an idea I outlined and really wanna write: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/739969858334294016/hiiii-mutual-i-am-secrecy-asking-if-u-have-anymore

((Sorry for the plain text links, Tumblr app is NOT cooperating with me right now to add hyperlinks. I'd post the image directly if that one was mine.))

Basically, I just really need to see Bro and Cal making out with blood in their mouths, and I started a whole convoluted, unrelated outline in order to make that hapen. It'll probably just be a really short thing that ends at the uh climax, since otherwise it's gonna end up sadstuck. And I don't like sadstuck lol.

Undeniably t4t: Bro and Dirk are always trans for me, and Lil Cal's got that uh... what percentage did I calculate it out to be? 13% of Dirk is in Lil Cal [ My shitpost calculations: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/746702663327072256/i-ran-out-of-tags-rambling-about-this-so-im-just ] so Lil Cal is at least 13% trans because of that much of Dirk being in him, plus however you feel about the other components being trans. LMAO this is ridiculous to type out. Moving on.

EDIT: FUTURE CORI INTERJECTING WITH A:

"Lil Cal Top Surgery Healing Progess: Day 1"

Terrible for each other affectionate/derogatory: I don't even know where the affectionate/derogatory split occurs. I multiship BroCal as both Bro/normal puppet Lil Cal and as Bro/evil juju puppet Lil Cal, and whatever combination in between or outside of that. Terrible in that Bro is so obsessed with Cal that he doesn't have normal relationship/social skills and uses Lil Cal as both a crutch and motivator alternately, in a terrible cycle, or maybe rather... spiral. And also terrible in that Bro is caught in the allure of playing the role of puppeteer while also being a puppet for the darker parts of Lil Cal, whether he actively knows it or not. (Honestly though, I feel like it's dismissive if you try to blame all of Bro's faults on Lil Cal like this tho, which is why I tend towards liking Lil Cal as just a regular puppet a lil bit more. Or at least, a regular mildly supernatural puppet since that can be a little more entertaining if Cal can get into mischief while no one's looking or give off the vibes of his mood more directly, rather than like entirely inanimate or 'just LE, trapped in a puppet body.' Again, I like all of these concepts.) ((I mean that can also be a whole post of its own, like, by the time Bro gets ahold of Lil Cal, are any of the other components still alive in there? Like, are ARquius and Gamzee still in there or did Caliborn kill and consume them entirely? Idk how it works, man. This is why I like Lil Cal as his own person, maybe just influenced by the feelings of the others. LaCroix: CalGamARquius essenced water. Lil Croix.))

They need to get weirder with it: YES YES. 1000% YES. I need entirely shameless Bro doing entirely shamless things to Lil Cal. I want them inseparable and doing unspeakable things to each other. I want Bro taking full advantage of Cal having a puppet body and all the intimacy that comes with making repairs and being elbow-deep in stuffing.

Playing with them like dolls cute/psychological torture: This is the same divide as with the 'terrible for each other' point, so I'm just gonna go with the cute one, since the torture one is self-explanatory. I want them fucking married. Like. Full mushy cute romance type of relationship that Bro has never felt for any of the people in his life (cough aromantic cough). I made this comic not too long ago, and I often fondly look back on it, because I adore the concept of Bro being lovey and romantic and everything out of character around Lil Cal because he feels safe and loved and comfortable around Cal:

[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/750602227910131712/brocal-4-lyfe-so-i-had-this-idea-of-dave-being ]

I made a post a long, long time ago (not gonna link that one bc it was personal and I was being very obviously mentally ill ["C'mon, like you're not being obviously mentally ill while typing paragraph upon paragraph about BroCal still in 2024 like 10 years later??" Fair.]) But the gist of it was that, like, having objectophilia or objectum sexuality is like, from an outsider pov, it's a way to express love to yourself. You filter all your self-hate through the object you love, and you get back unconditional love in return.

Lil Cal is never gonna hate Bro, no matter what Bro does. As a regular puppet, Lil Cal doesn't have the capacity for hate. And so that only brings them closer, since Cal is never gonna reject Bro for any reason. (Back to being a crutch. RSD is real, and Dave is probably a big trigger for that since he's not on the same wavelength of weird as Bro [not blaming Dave, obviously, this is a post about BroCal].) Bro can experience receiving positive attention from Lil Cal, without feeling 'fake' or uncool by expressing that same attention or affection directly to his own self. (Things are always done through multiple layers with the Striders, aren't they?) ((And I'm not saying Lil Cal doesn't love Bro, or that their relationship is just pretend - it's real, I'm just like, 'What's going on behind the curtain in the mundane situation?/ How is the relationship appealing?' Lil Cal luvs Bro 5eva 4 lyfe and that's a hard fact. Could cut diamonds with that shit.)) Example: maybe Bro is dealing with a bout of body/gender dysphoria and is trying to take out his frustration with working out, and it's not helping, even if he's powered through a set better than normal. Then, he notices the way Lil Cal is watching him, and he can feel the excitement seeping off Cal. He can sense the echoes of a wolf-whistle ring out through his mind, and it's like. Okay, none of that shit from before matters, he's got all the validation he needs right there in Lil Cal. Maybe flex in Cal's direction, Bro?

Oh, so back to being cute: isn't it wonderful how the template maker phrased it as 'playing dolls'? But yeah, I want all the mush and everything. Bro has a whole wardrobe for Lil Cal for every minor event that occurs in the Strider household. I want them going on genuine dates. Maybe even... holding hands. Bro blushes for the first time since he was 16. He even gets to take Lil Cal with him when he goes out to DJ or put on a show. Not to mention the whole website business. (I've talked about Cal's role in that before, but I'll mention it in a moment...)

They will die in a heart shaped pool of blood: I mean, kinda did happen, even tho Lil Cal didn't perma die right there. I don't think this one needs any explanation, since it basically happens in canon.

'You should see the other guy...': Okay, so. About 11 years ago, I had a really great idea. About how smuppets enter this world. I expanded on it in the following more-recent post (adult only content lol): https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741683686717669376/back-in-the-day-my-friends-called-me-insane-when-i

To sum it up, whenever Bro makes a new smuppet design, he then gives it a video debut on his website, where uh, Lil Cal births the smuppet like it's a horror movie scene, fake blood and poly-fil gore all over the place as the smuppet crawls out from the viscera. Bro then gets to play aftercare by lovingly and gently cleaning up and restuffing Lil Cal as they get to admire their new creation and rake in the dough lol.

So it's technically not a 'you should see the other guy' kinda situation, but it does involve one of them being... idk what word would describe it. Injured by the other? Usually a character loses a fight and says this to act like they got out of it better than the other guy, but... We could have someone knock on the door during the filming of a scene like that, and Bro has to answer it with fake blood up to his elbows, and be like 'You should see the other guy.' (But obviously, that's a terrible idea and would cause more trouble than it's worth... Maybe worth it for a persistent door to door salesperson, though.)

Though, I guess I should also say, I'm not opposed to Bro beating on Lil Cal in or out of the bedroom. Or in the case of animate Lil Cal, Cal choking out Bro. In or out of the bedroom, lol. Depends on the situation, like I said I will ship this ship any which way. But my preference for animate Lil Cal is to be like a totally normal puppet around Bro (or mushy in-love with Bro) and then evil-murder-puppet towards anyone else in Bro's life, like a... toxic yaoi guard puppet. (New Phrase Achievement Unlocked!) Bro brings home another guy to have sex, who tries to stay the night due to the late hour, but the guy wakes up shortly after to see Lil Cal standing there with a knife in the dark, eyes glowing red. Panic ensues when the guest screams and freaks out, and by the time Bro's got a light on, grabbing his sword, ready for a ninja vs ninja fight (bc an intruder would've had to bypass all the traps), Lil Cal is just innocently splayed across the desk chair, no knife in sight. Relevant post (well, the caption on the post too, saying how Bro can't seem to hold onto any relationships besides Lil Cal):

[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741830516962164736/i-want-you-so-youre-mine-always-selfishly ]

Uh, lol, also Cal choking out Bro in the bedroom, adult only drawing: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/754328907438800896/i-wouldnt-wanna-be-my-ex-when-he-found-out-who

Thinking about them always and forever: Listen. My Tumblr as proof, I've had BroCal on the brain for at least 11 years at this point. Definitely longer, since I first started reading Homestuck. I fucking love puppets and dolls and plushies and I always have. Man, if I hadn't deleted Tweets (automated app I used to do, and I couldn't choose what to save) from when I was in high school, you could've seen me @ ing my fave band when they were taking lyric suggestions on a fan-inspired album, where I was telling them 'make a song where the theme is puppets' and, while I don't know if they saw that or took the suggestion (they had responded to me before bc they weren't huge yet), there is indeed a song titled "Puppets" on that album, and it was my favourite song on there. Point is, I was fated to ship BroCal before I even knew it existed.

Sicko 2 sicko communication: I mean, does this even need explaining? Bro and Cal aren't just on the same wavelength of freaky, they're the fucking source of the wavelength, and it's causing a feedback loop between them. And it does as feedback does, which is, it amplifies with time. (Going back to the spiral symbolism here, lol.) ((Actually, time can play a symbol here, too, I guess, but idk how to word it, I'm starting to run out of steam.))

Let them have a happy ending: God, I need this so badly. I know Bro's story ends in Homestuck, but like. Pls. Someone needs to officiate their wedding. Currently placing the dreambubble order, but I can't organize a wedding by myself. OH speaking of. In that lil comic I did above, where Bro is accepting Lil Cal's proposal, I had the Natural Born Killers wedding scene in mind. I was gonna draw that as a follow up, but I think I have too many WIPs going. Just two people on the run, saying "I do" in a scenic but completely ordinary roadside location. Idk why, I keep going back to that movie for things related to Bro (I mention it in a very important scene in a longer WIP I've been writing, as something Bro watched and internalized as a kid lol.) It's not the best movie lol. Anyway.

The devotion omg: I feel like I have already gotten my point across about this, but let me reiterate:

[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/735842968450269184/in-the-name-of-iconic-magical-girl-anime-ill ]

Bro and Lil Cal absolutely beat the shit outta Jack Noir before he gets prototyped. And even then, they fight together till the death, like. C'mon. Nothing more romantic than fighting a losing battle side by side. Also, like, Lil Cal having his own protective chest for safekeeping as seen in the Strider living room? Like, you don't just have a protective case for any old thing, especially something meant to be handled, especially something that is regularly used to smack other things/humans. What I'm saying is, Lil Cal is durable and resilient, and yet, Bro still has a case for transporting Cal safely. Oh, wait, I just thought of something funny, what if Lil Cal goes feral like a cat, and basically the chest is like a cat carrier so Bro can drive without being constricted lmaoooo, I've been typing for hours can you tell?

Kind of homophobic: Listen. I HAD a Cal. Took him to college. Staked my claim on the top bunk bc I am royalty. Proceeded to not have anywhere to set my water cup and had to use a cardboard box as a table up there. Spilled water. Melted Cal's sharpie-drawn face. And then proceeded to cry. I have a WIP of Lil Cal 2, but that requires actually remembering to work on him. I wanna do better by the pattern, too, since I rushed to finish the first. I have all the material! I have the project started! So it's just a matter of reordering my WIP priorities, honestly.

Where is all the fucking content?!: For realzz. I was actually venting about this the other day (didn't end up posting it), but it's like, either there's no BroCal content, or there IS BroCal content, but I can't reblog it for reasons I don't want to get into on this post. I'm dying of thirst in the ocean, basically. Whatever. This just means I need to make more BroCal content myself, which I am more than happy to do. I've just had a rough past few months, so I'm glad I got to type all this post out, and hopefully I can get back to creating soon.

Last one! I hope this one makes up for the absurd length of the post, it's prob my new fave idea I just came up with on the spot.

[TW drink spiking by a stranger mentioned in this.]

Committing atrocities as their silly little activities: I think we all know what this means, but I am going to ignore that elephant with my special x-ray vision. Because this is a BroCal post. I'm digging deep to the meat and bones of this. Honestly, this could go multiple routes, it depends on how you take your Lil Cal.

One could place emphasis on the 'guard' part of the, ahem ahem, toxic yaoi guard puppet. Maybe someone is actually trying to harm Bro, and Bro legit can't do anything for reasons outside of his control - let's say his drink got spiked a while after he invited a stranger home that he thought was chill. As Bro gets shoved down on the futon, his memory of the night is only a few flickers. Familiar orange plush, roiling around above him like a dancing windsock. Flashes of Lil Cal's face all distorted and stretched wide like a funhouse. J-Lo and Ice Cube on the TV. But when Bro is finally able to fully wake up in the morning, everything is as if he just got home alone last night and passed out on the futon. Cal looks totally normal and content tucked under Bro's warm arm. Except when Bro gets up, there is a pair of shoes too big to belong to him at the door. Maybe Bro knows. Maybe instinct tells him to run. Maybe he does, but he's running towards Lil Cal, every time.

[strawberrisncreme]

Only A Minute in Gojo Satoru's Mind.

{Read HERE on AO3 ♥ I promise the formatting is way better bc idk how Tumblr works anymore}

Pairing: Satoru Gojo x Suguru Geto Summary:

*SUMMARY CONTAINS S2 ANIME SPOILERS* His mind struggled to reconcile the impossible sight before him. What stood there…was somebody whom he killed last year, with his own hands …his best friend.

AN:

Hellooo this is my very first JJK fic+ my first fic in 5 months wahoo idk what tf I'm doing I just know that SatoSugu makes me sad and fills me with yearning so this is the result of that :))   Will maybe? be OOC?? I tried my best though ;; ((AKA: My interpretation of satosugus relationship and the memories that flowed through Gojo in the 1 (one) minute that Kenny needed before locking up Six-Eyes McGee))

"Prison Realm, Gate Open."

"Yo!"

"Satoru."

His eyes widened in disbelief as he stood frozen.

The all-too familiar voice sent a sharp chill down his spine.

Slowly, mechanically, his body twisted toward the presence behind him.

"Huh?"

The world seemed to blur momentarily, his usual impeccable vision reduced to mere hazy impressions. The ambient noises of the subway station became drowned out by his own roaring pulse resounding in his ears.

"Long time no see."

His mind struggled to reconcile the impossible sight before him.

What stood there…was somebody whom he killed last year, with his own hands

…his best friend.

A fake?

Some kind of transformation technique?

All possibilities are rejected by his six eyes.

No.

It’s really him!

The corners of his mouth twitched upward.

The motion came to him easily, familiar, instinctual.

The result of years of habit etched into his very soul.

And then it all came flowing into his brain.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Bangs.

That’s the first word that pops into Satoru Gojo’s mind as he took in the appearance of the youth before him. Appearance-wise he didn’t seem all that special, jet-black hair with those weirdass bangs that only covered the left side of his face. But well, he’d be hard-pressed to meet anyone as special as he is, being the pride of the Gojo clan and the first person in four hundred years to inherit both Limitless and the Six Eyes (not to brag but he’s totally bragging).

The boy in front of him seemed completely uninterested and unimpressed as he gave Satoru a quick once-over before offering what was CLEARLY a smile for the sake of only being polite.

“Satoru…Gojo, is it? Pleased to make your acquaintance, my name is Suguru Geto. Yaga mentioned that we’d be pairing up for a mission today…although he didn’t mention that you would be an hour late.”

Satoru felt his left eye twitch at the tone that the boy- what was his name again? Suguru?? Anyway, that Suguru used with him. Two can play at this game. “Am I late? I hardly noticed!” He drawled, voice dripping with sarcasm. “I guess some of us actually have important things to be doing instead of sitting around all day.”

Was he being petty? Sure! Is it true that he is maybe a little late by an hour or so??  PERHAPS!! But who’s counting really? Besides, he’d be damned if he was going to waste his precious energy being all polite and shit to someone who came swinging at him from the very start. 

The apprehension between the two hung heavy in the air as they sized each other up. Suddenly, a tiny laugh rang through the empty classroom that Satoru belatedly recognized to be Suguru’s cut through the tense atmosphere. “Is that so?” Suguru hummed, tapping his fingers on the desk in front of him. “Well, we’d best get moving then so you can get back to your ‘important things’, don’t you agree? Gojo-kun? 

And if it weren’t for the fact that Satoru was so focused on the way his name rolled off Suguru’s tongue, then he might’ve found it in himself to actually come up with a snarky response. Instead, he opted to grumble a few complaints under his breath before turning on his heel. 

“Yeah yeah whatever, let’s just get this over with. Geto-kun. ”

————————————

Satoru gawked with open disgust as Suguru casually swallowed the small black orb that was once a rather disgusting looking spiky-wormy curse without batting an eye. “Blegh, gross. What do those things even taste like anyway?” Exorcising curses was bad enough, Satoru couldn’t even imagine having to eat them too. 

Suguru paused, “...Why do you care?”

“I don’t.” He shrugged, “Just trying to make some conversation, be friendly, blah blah blah-” Satoru’s monologue cut short as a huge tapeworm-thing pierced through the ground, lunging at him while filling the air with an annoying high-pitched SCREEEE .

“I’m sure it’s a difficult task for you, but let’s save the chit-chat for later! We’re in the middle of a mission here in case you forgot.”

“Haah? Don’t tell me you’re scared of a little danger, Geto-kun .” He taunted, easily dodging out of the way. “And here I thought that being able to use cursed spirit manipulation meant you were something like a Pokémon master…guess you’re just another weakling!” “Oh for the love of- JUST SHUT UP AND FIGHT ALREADY! ”

————————————

“Hey, you’re still alive right?” Satoru carefully nudged Suguru’s prone body with his foot, his tone half-joking but also kinda worried as he scanned over the still-bleeding scratches littered across the other’s face. “It’d be really embarrassing if you died in such a pathetic way, you know that right? At least try and hold out until we can get outside the veil Geto-kun! You know the only one who can use reversed curse technique is that girl right? What was her name again? Shaka? Soho? Whatever. Anyways, my point is that I’ll never let you live it down! Not to mention you owe me for getting you out of there in one piece after all, I expect you to at least get rid of a few more of those things-” “You talk too much.” Suguru interjected, groaning as he shifted around, carefully positioning himself upright. “Besides, don’t just casually pronounce me as dead.” He grumbled before flashing Satoru a bold, confident smile. “I have no intention of dying any time soon.”

His blatant courage stirred something inside of Satoru… inspiration? Meh, probably adrenaline. Whatever it was, it gave Satoru Gojo a sense of exhilaration. “ You know …now that I’m looking at you, you’re actually kinda cool.” Satoru grinned, cracking his knuckles in anticipation. “Alright! But just so you know, if you do die on me, then I’ll kill you.” Suguru laughed.

————————————

Shoko (righttt, that was her name!) brushed off her skirt as she stood, patting Suguru on the shoulder lightly. “All done~ good thing that you two have me in your year huh? Anywho, two packs of cigarettes will do as thanks Geto-kun! Since you seem the least likely to get carded after all~. ” “Thank you Ieiri-san…” Suguru smiled gratefully, “I’m in your debt.”

As Shoko floated out of the room, Satoru pushed himself off the wall he was leaning against, sauntering next to Suguru’s bed. “Speaking of debts…you also owe me. Remember?” He quipped, not that he actually needed anything when it came to money or material things. But if he was being honest with himself, there was something about Suguru Geto that piqued his curiosity. He wanted to know him better. 

“Ah…right.” Suguru looked at him cautiously, which, ouch. Did Satoru really seem that unapproachable? “...So? Name your price.”

Satoru paused, trying to make his tone seem nonchalant. “Got any cursed spirits in that collection of yours that can fly? Suguru . ”

A moment of silence passed between the two before Suguru burst out into laughter, the noise brightening the room and filling up a hollow in Satoru’s chest that he didn’t even know existed until then. “I do.” Suguru beamed. “Want a ride? Satoru .” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Three years of his youth. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The streets of Kawasaki buzzed with activity as waves upon waves of people crammed themselves into a small area for some type of festival. The tantalizing smell of food stalls wafted through the air, enticing passersby to indulge a little as stall-owners waved eagerly at customers to take a look.

The two Second-Years had just finished up a mission nearby, and decided to take a well-deserved break before heading back to Jujutsu High. Satoru stifled a yawn as he hovered behind Suguru whose attention was currently invested in a booth selling what claimed to be the ‘Best Hojicha Tea in all of Japan!’ which, sheesh , overconfident much? “ Suguruuuuuu. ” He groaned, purposefully turning off infinity to knock his head repeatedly into the other’s back which was actually really solid to his surprise considering how slim Suguru looked in his uniform. “Can we leave yet? I can feel my stomach slowly starting to digest itself! If I don’t feed it within the next 10 seconds I could die…and then who would be your best friend then, huh? And here I thought that you cared about me! Even Shoko wouldn’t be able to fix me if I were dead, you know that right? Suguru? Hey, Suguruu- ” 

“Is that so? Guess all that rumbling I heard was your stomach then Satoru . And here I thought it was a special grade curse making all that noise.” Suguru thanked the cashier before turning to face Satoru with his usual easy smile.

“It’s too hot here and you promised you’d treat me to ramen while we were in Kawasaki, yet here you are rambling on and on about tea leaves with some old geezer!” Satoru was aware that his voice was coming out more petulant than he would’ve liked but Suguru was used to his complaining at this point, BESIDES! He was hungry and tired of standing for so long. “Patience is a virtue, Satoru.” Suguru cooed, rubbing the back of Satoru’s neck comfortingly. “I’m almost done, I just need to find one more thing before we leave so hold out for a little while longer will you?” His voice was soft, which is extremely unfair because he knows how weak Satoru is to him when he talks like that.

“Fine.” He caved, “But I’m not following you. I’m gonna find some shade to rest under while you continue with your retail therapy.” Suguru chuckled, giving Satoru an amused look. "Suit yourself, Satoru. Just make sure you don't get into any trouble while I finish up here."

As Suguru weaved his way back through the lively crowd, Satoru found a shaded spot near a small fountain and decided to take a seat on its edge. He watched the people passing by, the vibrant atmosphere of the festival creating a pleasant backdrop. Despite his initial complaints, Satoru couldn't help but appreciate the energy surrounding him.

Just as he was about to drift off into a light doze, a presence in front of him caused his eyes to fly open. A mischievous smile played on Suguru's lips as he stood before Satoru, holding a pair of sunglasses. Even from a glance Satoru could tell that the silver frame was made from high-quality material, elegantly encircling each lens which upon careful inspection, had a bluish tint to them. 

"What do you think, Satoru? Found something interesting," Suguru said, holding the shades closer up for him to see.

Satoru raised an eyebrow, eyeing the mask with skepticism. "Don’t tell me you want to start wearing matching sunglasses? No offense but that just screams tacky Suguru."

Suguru chuckled. "Not exactly. I thought it would suit you. Didn’t you mention your current pair was starting to get scratched up? Come on, put it on. Consider it a souvenir and apology for making you wait so long."

Satoru hesitated for a moment, eyeing the sunglasses before finally relenting. "Well, if it's a gift from you, I suppose I can't refuse." He winked before taking the sunglasses from Suguru, appreciating the craftsmanship and the stylish design. As he put them on, he couldn't help but admit they felt surprisingly comfortable.

Suguru grinned, nodding in approval. "They look good on you, Satoru."

Satoru couldn't help the flush of heat that rose to his face, hoping the blush would be hidden beneath his new shades. "I guess I can forgive you for making me wait this time, Suguru. These are pretty cool." 

The two friends spent the rest of the day immersed in the festivities of Kawasaki, their laughter and banter echoing through the bustling streets. As the sun set and the vibrant lights of the festival illuminated the night, they found themselves at a ramen shop, finally fulfilling Satoru's earlier request. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Although it was just an instant… ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The first snowfall of the year had blanketed Tokyo in a pristine coat of white. The city's bustling energy had quieted to a hushed serenity, and even the cursed spirits seemed to take a pause in their mischief. Amidst this winter wonderland, Suguru and Satoru found themselves unexpectedly united in a rare moment of peace.

On the outskirts of the city, where the snow lay undisturbed, the pair stood facing each other. The bitter cold nipped at the tips of their ears and their exposed noses. A mischievous glint sparkled in Satoru’s eyes as he glanced at the untouched snow around them.

"Hey Suguru… I challenge you to a snowball fight," Gojo declared with a playful grin.

He raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing on his lips. "You're on, Satoru. No Limitless allowed though, that’s just a natural cheat."

“Hah!” Satoru’s grin widened, “Not like it would make a difference! You’ll never land a hit on me.”

And so, the two powerful sorcerers began their impromptu snowball battle. The quiet landscape echoed with the sounds of laughter and the soft thuds of snowballs meeting their targets. Geto's precision and Gojo's speed made it a fierce competition, each trying to outmaneuver the other in the whirlwind of flying chunks of snow.

After a particularly intense exchange, they found themselves panting and covered in snow. A truce was silently declared as they sat side by side on a snow-covered bench, catching their breath. The quietness of the snowy landscape seemed to seep into their souls, the air was crisp and the only sounds were the soft whispers of the wind or the occasional rustle of a nearby tree branch weighed down by snow.

"Who would have thought that a snowball fight could be so... therapeutic?" Suguru remarked, a hint of amusement in his voice.

Gojo chuckled, a rare genuine smile gracing his usually carefree expression. "Snow has a way of reminding us of simpler times, doesn't it? Before curses and duty were at the center of our lives."

Their conversation was interrupted by the distant chime of a nearby shrine bell, signaling the approach of the New Year. The significance of the moment lingered in the air, and they both felt the weight and the anticipation of the year to come.

"I suppose even you can be sentimental then," Geto mused, breaking the momentary silence.

Gojo nodded in agreement. "Maybe we should make this a tradition—annual snowball fights to remind us of the fleeting joy in life."

As they stood up from the bench, brushing off the snow, the cold no longer felt as biting. The untouched snow around them held the promise of a fresh start. The city lights in the distance twinkled like distant stars, and for that brief moment, there were no curses or obligations that held them back. They were simply Suguru Geto and Satoru Gojo in a quiet, snow-covered corner of Tokyo.

“Let’s go home, Satoru.”

Hand in hand, they walked back towards the city, leaving behind them two pairs of footprints embedded in the snow. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For Satoru Gojo... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Star Plasma Vessel mission.

Riko Amanai’s Death.

Applause.

Applause.

Applause.

“You’re late, Suguru. No, I guess you got here fast. There are several Star Religious Group facilities in the city after all.”

Applause.

“Satoru? Is that you? What happened?”

                                                                                       A ppla  use.

“I see you already saw Shoko.”

                             App   la  use.

“Yeah, she healed me. I’m fine now. No, me being safe doesn’t help anything here.”

“I screwed up. You’re not at fault.”

“Let’s head back.”

Ap      p  au  s e.

“Suguru. Should we kill these guys? The way I feel right now...I doubt I’d feel anything about it.”

“No. There’s no point.”

“No point…huh. Does there really need to be any point to it?”

————————————

“Are you the strongest because you’re Satoru Gojo?”“Or are you Satoru Gojo because you’re the strongest?”

“What the hell are you trying to say?” “Listen to me!”

“If I were able to become you,”“This foolish ideal would become a lot more grounded and real.”“Don’t you think?”

“...” “Don’t think anything strange. Just please come over here!”

“I’ve decided how I’ll live my life.”“Now it’s just a matter of doing the best I can to achieve that.”

“...” “I’ll listen to you so please-”

“If you want to kill me, then kill me.”“There would be a point to that.”

"Say something!”

——————————————

“You’re late.” “Satoru.”

——————————

“Do you have any last words?”

————————

“No matter what anyone says”“I hate those monkeys.”

“But”

“I never held any hatred for those in Jujutsu High.”

“I just couldn’t wear a heartfelt smile in this world.”

——————

“Suguru.”

“ █ ████ ███ ”

———

“Pfft-”

“At least curse me a little at the very end.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One minute had passed a long time ago. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“So.”

“Who the hell are you?”

“I’m Suguru Geto!” “Don’t you remember me? How sad…”

“All the information provided by my Six Eyes is telling me you’re Suguru Geto.”

“But.”

“BOTH MY HEART AND MY SOUL KNOW OTHERWISE!”

"Gate Close."

[erose-this-name]

Primer On Stylistic Elements Of Internet Speak (Zoomerese) (from what I've learned by being terminally online)

This is just text, like, normal fucking text. nothing special about this.

Because base English 🥱 only has support for shouting :O (!) questions🤨(?) and statements ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) (.), and we wanted to add new registers of voice :P, (and keyboards limit the ability to add new symbols) :-( a lot of new features to the language have to be made out of other symbols or be made of stylistic elements instead of a dedicated symbol. And since there's no dedicated authority to teach people new abstract symbols, they had to be faces so they could be intuitive. ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ♡

This isn't sARcaSTIc at all, I mean come on, why would anyone EVER want to indicate SARCASM by OVEREXAGGERATING to compensate for """"English not having a sarcasm punctuation mark""""? Like, c'mon, it's not like "/s" or ".~" can also be used AS a sarcmark.~

Oh, yeah? "RanDOM CaPS mAKeS IT sOunD LIkE mOCkiNG" that's what you sound like.

This is TOTALLY post-irony OR meta-irony, where you just, like, SAY what you actually mean but IN A SARCASTIC WAY??? Uh, what is this, some kinda "gen z exclusive" comedy/slang feature?? Like, wow, I guess you would need to do that to "create some distance" between you and your beliefs by giving you the ability to say you were "JuST KiDDinG", or as a "joke" because ""zoomers"" are so oversaturated with content that normal single level sarcasm doesn't work anymore and they need to layer that shit up two or three times, or some bullshit like that.

I'm finna splain txt messg shorthand, aka sms language. its like faster 2 type & kinda gives u a valley grl vibe. itz actually a bit harder 2 learn than the rest of these and I'm not gud at it. kthnx

This. Is. Putting. A. Period. On. Every. Fucking. Word. This. Shit. Makes. It. Sound. Like. You. Motherfucker. Are. Very. FUCKING. Angry. And. Authoritative. (this prosody is also a new [and relatively rare] feature in spoken English as well.)

UwU, what's this? Nya, thiws iws uwu/owo voice! (UwU)! Iwt iws meant towo sowund wike a baby voice, vewy cute (hazawdouswy cute) (UwU!), awnd iws used excwusivewy by fuwwies awnd femboys awnd fuwwy femboys uwu awnd anyaone who uses iwt "iwonyacawwy" iws secwetewy owne nya of those pwobabwy uwu. use at youw own peril (you will wose bwaincewws awnd become gay) nya! RAWR XD

Dis ar teh LOLCAT, it be VRY OUTDATD MEME, but sum bits ov dis style ov brokd grammar an spellin' still appears on teh interwebs in TINY DOSES 2 mak it seem cutr an dumbr or leik a cat 4 ironic purposez, LIEK ONCE OR TWICE PER POST!!!1!1 DO NOT OVAR USE IT LIEK IM U WILL DYE!!!1!1!

uh all lowercase and without punctuation makes it seem childish/lazy which can be used for irony if what youre saying is actually very important or authoritative but you dont wanna sound that way because you are depressed or just wanna feel cute or maybe some other reason idk im just a boy

Exclamation marks (!) indicate excitement and energy! My Dad (ex-typographer) whose really really cool says that exclamation marks (!) mean you're SHOUTING and not to use them!!! And he's really cool, but that's not right anymore because SHOUTING IS INDICATED BY ALL UPPERCASE!!!!!

AAAA WHY ARE WE SHOUTING!?

fUCK CAPS LOCK IS ON THIS LOOKS LIKE AN OBVIOUS MISTAKE/UNINTENTIONAL SHOUTING FUNNY JOKE.

This is Capitalizing The First Letter In Every Word, which is done on Tumblr Dot Com but not much elsewhere. It brings to mind how Titles and Headlines also sometimes Capitalizing The First Letter In Every Word, and gives your post an aura of Authority and to Nounify Something.

Most other parts of the internet™®© do this where they spam copyright and trademark symbols®©™®©© to achieve the same effect as capitalizing the first letter in every word©©™.

>be me >go on 4Chan.org >dies immediately.exe >looks into posts >discovers entirely unique and interesting writing style called greentext >ask why its called that >Get called a "newf*g, desu" >it's mostly used by incels to gaslight fa/tg/uys and /b/***** (they wouldn't censor that) into reading stories they made up about themselves where they become a sex haver >literally no one believes that any greentext has ever actually happened >find incest greentext >ew.wav >read it anyways because ******** (utter self-loathing is important for authentic greentext) >it's just the plot of Star Wars: Empire Strikes Back >mfw

I learned 4Channerish so you don't have to. Seriously, don't.

(If I've missed anything please reblog to expand our VALUABLE COLLECTIVE EDUTRAINING ABILITIES)

[cringefailcabitha]

sorry i dont have tumblr (i only use it to stalk cabby art LOL) and idk if youll answer this but i am known as the cabby yapper by my friends so i wanted to bring this up to someone who thinks about her as deeply as me

do you ever like think about how terrifying mephones plan for a season 4 would have been to cabby specifically? out of all of the final 3 she has been hurt by the game the most (with no closure mind you unlike balloon), i think having to go through everything again would genuinely break her. even if shes less misunderstood the game still puts pressure onto her to be a facts machine, a strategist. when shes literally the kindest person ever, trying to comfort silver (despite his constant mistreatment of her), and sacrificing almost every post merge challenge for the sake of somebody else (i.e giving up her inani-mate for yinyang, sacrificing herself in episode 13 to put herself on the line with yinyang even if she was manipulating them out of obligation, AND EPISODE 15 SHE DEFINITELY WOULD HAVE WON IF SHE HAD USED HER FILES and completely foiling blueberrys plan, but she didnt because she cared about bot)

in the episode when shes reading the file, the screen actually starts shaking a little. implying she was absolutely horrified at what she was reading. and she had every single right, especially considering what shes gone through.

the other thing that’s absolutely insane to me is the fact that this information was conveyed to her via a file. aka her disability aid, something she relies on. that mustve been horrifying to see something so person to her used against her in such a way.

sorry i regurgitated a lot of this info from the shut i put on tiktok. im just genuinely crazy about cabby

ALSO UR A CABTUBE TRUTHER IM LITERALLY SO IN LOVE WITH CABTUBE i am lesbian cabbys number one truther and see her shipped with men far too much. but like i was so hoping test tube would at least apologize or something. it irritates me how they can make one sided silvercandle canon but they cant show us anymore one-sided cabtube. just make her blush or something. but tbh it made me emo when test tube (and pb bc they nodded) oraised cabby, it made me genuinely crazy.

also unshout out to everyone bullying cabby this episode genuinely why were half of them so mean please let silver Die slowly and painfully. also if lifering (i hc him and cabby as father and daughter, like u cannot convince me lifering and floory arent her dads) switched up on cabby i will personally take his soul like the grim reaper he will be seeing these hands.

sorry feel free to ignore this!

-🍭

😭 I was for real thinking about that earlier today like hasn’t she been through enough… Yes Cabby is a very competitive person but after everything that happened to her in this season and the fact that she’s Still in a vulnerable place right now I don’t think she would find it particularly enjoyable to not receive a prize and then immediately be thrust into a new season of competition— and as a team leader, no less.

Test Tube thanking her for apologising was,,, weird to me. I literally rolled my eyes. It gave me the impression that she (and Paintbrush) think Cabby *should* be apologising to everyone for making some of them uncomfortable? And I just don’t agree. As polite as it is, I think it’s way overstating her actions. Like… why is it “right” to apologise to the entire jury for her past behaviour making “some of them uncomfortable” pre episode 7 when she had never even worked with half of them when said behaviour was supposedly occurring? It’s so frustrating to me, like… how much smaller does she have to make herself for them to be satisfied? I don’t get it.

And of course, “making them uncomfortable” thing again comes back to her files. It’s basically impossible for her not to internalise the idea that keeping information is bad because she Might get things wrong (which. Is another thing. As far as we’ve seen, her writing is almost always correct, barring Bot which is an obvious outlier, and erroneously attributing Suitcase turning on her alliance in season 2 to Balloon’s manipulation.) In episode 15 too, aka the worst Test Tube episode to me, she says Cabby thinks everyone is just “what she happened to write down” as if Cabby is careless and doesn’t do her due diligence when writing her files. Which to me directly contradicts her calling Cabby’s Fan file “impeccable” and having “so many notes” back in episode 2?

And as for Test Tube’s assertion that Cabby would turn on her the moment she stopped being useful, and that she treated everyone like chess pieces on her little board, it really felt like her jumping to conclusions because of what happened with Fan. Because she has done that to no other member of the Pinkers. And there is way less manipulation on Cabby’s part in the show than Test Tube’s irritation would have it seem.

I’m not sure if the writers intentions were to make Cabby as manipulative as Silver from the beginning, but if it was and that’s why this is all going on, well. Mission status isn’t exactly a success to me— the only manipulation she does is in episode 2, when she tries to get Bot to vote out Fan (and presumably the rest of the team as well), and episode 7, where she makes a big show of approaching Silver about how it would be better for him to stack the ice cream because, knowing him to be lazy and careless, it would increase the odds of him screwing up the challenge and make it easier to vote him out.

I’m at least relieved that Test Tube seems to have been thinking about things whenever Cabby says something self-effacing or seems to be nice, because it gives me hope that she may finally realise she’s been taking it too far and maybe Cabby will get an apology, but the fact that she’s been just sitting on it for like 3 episodes by now is killing me,

[edith-is-a-cat]

OMG!! i love crystals so muchhhhh that's got such a good vibe you captured me perfectly :D

i also love minecraft foxes especially the Rotund Ones in that one mod. i'm so excited to see more arctic foxes in game because those are my favorite :) i would keep your netherite sword safe!!!

also dw i'm not worried :3 i don't mind anxiety, i have it myself. i'm not the most social person in the world but online i tend to be more outgoing. i'm kinda getting back into the tumblr scene after a year or two of neglecting it so i'm a little anxious here and there too lolol. patting your head! don't drink too much energy stuff~

in return, i am telling you to look up blue tiger's eye crystals, since you seem to like blue and you are also a cat. :) they have really cool banding and it's so reflective and pretty. one of my favorite crystals.

THE NOISE I MADE I LOVE READING LONG ASK THEY ARE SO SWEET 💕 (My older sibling made a noise back at me from downstairs 😭)

RAH SINCE I WAS REMINDED I MUST SHARE THW RANDOM CRYSTALS I KEEP IN MY ROOM AND BATHROOM (with many sea shells too)

yes all the photos have flash on because im a "one of those creatures who've evolved to spend their entire existence in a pitch black cave that's closed off from the world" (direct quote from my friend) an i never have any lights on i just run into things

WUGH WHAT MOD EXACTLY??? IM GOING TO WRITE IT DOWN AND HOPEFULLY USE IT ONE DAY!! (I haven't gotten minecraft on my pc yet, ive wanted to mod minecraft for a while but couldn't bc forever on an ipad, but i have modded stardew valley and it wasn't as scary as I thought it was! Now i can live happily with my 6 wives!! Plus ive been wanting to mod Deltarune for the Ribbit mod! but its more scary and complicated since there isn't as big of a modding community around it, ill figure it out though!!!)

also if u were like a little fox in minecraft i would give you a special nametag using my magic §!! (you can get that symbol by holding down &!! idk if your keyboard is the same but that how i get it!! It changes the text color depending on what letter you put by it!!!) Also i would construct you the best enclosure ever (or just plant a forest!!)

WUGH SO REAL if real life was like being online everything would be so cool (and maybe suck a bit more?? people get more voiced online for better and for worse ;~;)

+ I got back into tumblr like!!! October 2022, well i was never really into it but I did have my first blog that i never really did anything with (its now my reblog account)

also on the energy drink note my chem teacher said i had a problem 😭 (I dont!!! I exist like a month without any!! (I love her i showed her my can locker where i had filled my school locker with energy drink cans and shes just like "cool bud" SHE ALSO WAS ONE OF THE TWO TEACHERS TO ASK FOR OUT PREFERRED NAMES I LOVE HER))

On the blue tiger's eye note!!!! Yes. please. give. I need them i have so many things to decorate!!!! I need to put up shelves around my bed so i can look at my random stuff i adore!!!!! (the only thing i have up on my wall is something i drew for my art class and my Undertale heart locket aka one of my most prized possessions... sadly the the music box in it doesn't work anymore i played it so often, cries, it broke when i was trying to wind it for the little kids at my old school)

OKAY DID NOT KNOW I COULD TALK SO MUCH!!! DJFJDB

[j2lx]

Major life update... And maybe the end

Hello everyone! You might have noticed my lack of posts and the fact that I haven't written since the year has started, and I'm just here to address that (out of my own will, not because anyone is harassing me don't worry).

So basically the main point is that I've gone back to school after a good two month holiday! And it might just be the start of the year but I have club activities thrice a week, a research programme once a week and just a heck ton of school work to finish on a daily, and weekly, basis. It's notoriously known as the hardest school year, and I can tell you that it's true =") I've basically had to do school work till 11pm (at least) everyday and it really has taken a toll on my body too.

I'm in a sports club, and we have a lot of training... Yeah. Long story short, my body hasn't been very good with handling everything so far, and I've been on the verge of collapsing from exhaustion more than I should have recently. I'm definitely not getting enough sleep, and my physical and mental state is weakening by quite a lot.

Writing used to be my escape from all this stress, and I used to be very very happy when I started to write. But now, with more and more pressure (mostly from myself, please don't blame yourself for this) to write better, I'm feeling burnt out and I just have no motivation to think and explore all the ideas I have. I'm losing interest in jujutsu kaisen too, and I just overall am having an extremely long and horrible writer's block.

Right now, any time I have to myself (which is scarce enough) is spent watching anime, reading manga or gaming (aka time to myself and just time to forget the rest of the world). I seriously can't find the time to write anymore, and I can't keep pushing things (including school stuff and mental health) out of the way to write in general. From fanfic to the stories I was thinking of submitting for a writing programme (that I might not apply for anymore, idk) I just cannot bring myself to touch anything writing related.

So on an even more serious note, I don't want to disappoint anyone with my subpar writing or whatever, so I probably will just be throwing out and posting out the fics I've forced myself to write and finishing whatever requests I have left, before leaving for goodness knows how long. And if it gets to me too much, I might either delete Tumblr just as a way to get rid of this stress, or delete this blog altogether (trust me, I don't want to do it if I can help it).

Yeah so that sums up pretty much everything going on right now, and I really would like to thank everyone for their support (and if you took the time to read through this). Life just isn't easy rn and I hope you understand.

dreamer out 🫡

[bitter-sweet-coffee]

ngl when i came back to tumblr i was forcibly pressured into adopting certain headcanons and relationship dynamics and ships from the sonic fandom. and i hold this grudge VERY strongly. because (un)thankfully, i’m a longtime fan and can at least be free to my own interpretations having been here long enough. like, i can VOUCH for something being popular at another time because i saw it myself. i’ve played all the games at some point or other, i read archie and fleetway albeit it’s been a while, and i have a good grasp on lore.

but what about new fans? what about the people who DONT get to choose. who DONT know that their headcanons are valid and fun and work with other canons. when you have popular fanon dictating what is acceptable and what isn’t, you have new fans who feel scared to say things like “oh i always interpreted silver and blaze to be a romantic pairing” or “i take shadow’s physical age literally and headcanon him as 50” because a) it isn’t what everyone else says and b) there are people who will attack them for this.

and look, i get that this isn’t the biggest issue in the world, it’s just fandom stuff. but god, it bothers me how 2022 was the sonic renaissance and we have all these new fans joining, an entire generation, and before they even think about or manage to experience the games and comics themselves, they’re being told to not read archie because penders is bad, and that amy has comphet, and shadow’s game sucks. stuff like that. and to just embrace the fanmade content that’s there and popular, because it’s cute and wholesome and the angst isn’t problematique.

idk, it feels wrong. it bothers me a lot. i love when people get to make their own little worlds with new headcanons and variety, because even if i don’t agree, i like that freewill and expressionism and personal touch. sometimes i feel like we don’t get that anymore. i know it wasn’t a perfect place in the fandom’s past, it was actually just as aggressive at times, but i expect more from the future fanbase when it comes to free expression and the coexistence of different fanon interpretations. but i guess i expect too much lol

note: i’m not proship. i have shipping boundaries and this isn’t a dogwhistle for people to make gross shit like the stuff you see when you google cream and vector without safesearch on. THAT is fucked up. i’m talking about having literally any opinion that isn’t squeaky clean aka espio is… a morally grey person who is arrogant, hotheaded, violent, and wishes death on people… because that’s canon and i like it and stuff like that. not everything is cute y’know?

[marzowo]

One more post b4 i sleep

Warning that this au is 1:A beast Au x Original Au mix

So its gonna make like no fucking sense

2:Ive never read or watched Bsd or beast bsd

sorry,im hoping someone will help my au makes sense

3: There are probably so many timeline incorrect things with this au,Aka why i got frustrated and gave up :/

Anyway first is the hc that i have,its a small one

But i hc that atsushis hair was originally black,and it turned white during his days in the orphanage and thats how the orphanage knew he was a monster (they didnt know what he was,but child with 'magic' in a toxic church?) probably a demon

They didnt know he was the tiger until later on

The next hc is a huge one :D

and it has to do with religious trauma,Im not going into detail but basically Atsushi has some severe,like some severe religious trauma,not only was he physically abused, The Orphanage's religion was used as a vice of punishment not only for atsushi but all the Orphanage kids,his was just the most severe(like cult typa shit,maybe ot was actually a cult)

Now for the O!bsd x B!bsd au

,l like to imagine for my ver of the au That theres technically 2 headmasters of the orphanage, The original headmaster and his son, when atsushi was a child he was a teenager Atsushi kills the original headmaster and its the son that gets into a car accident later in the bsd series, or you could switch it to atsushi killing the son and after he dies the father repents bcs he knows it was technically his fault.

[This is when shots starts to go downhill and starts to mention timelines]

Atsushi's orphanage bg is exactly like beast au,up to when mori finds him {i think mori might have gone to retrieve him} (this is as someone who nevee read beast tho,so im not sure if shes there but) atsushi escapes the orphanage instead of being kicked out,he roams the streets for awhile mostly sticking to alleys and he eventually finds himself close to ig one of the many bases that the PM has (idk ive never read or watched bsd or beast bsd) and elise is out running an errand(or something IDK WHAT SHE DOES SMH), we all know ellise knows shit she shouldnt,and she recognizes atsushi (idfk maybe she doesnt recognise him,she just finds his hair pretty.) but she takes him to mori and mori takes care of him for some time bcs why not (idk why i made this but,im now realising it makes no sense...) but mori gives him the decision of the port mafia or the ada (this is after a large timeskip btw,atsushi works in rhe shadows and noone,not even dazai knows he works for the pm,everything is essentially like cannon) and he decides he wants to take a break from the mafia for abit {this sounds like a wattpad fanfic,kill me now

and goes to work for the ada,just not in the usual sense, since noone knows who he is and he still works for mori (Queue Cannon) Atsushi basically is a hella good actor. [fuck this idea,all my homies hate this idea. Atsushi is an actor yes but he actually quits the pm instead and goes i to his found family arc.] he decides to join back the pm after the ada goes down Idk but the (current?) arc with dazai and fyodor passes and the pm somehow ends up unscathed but relocated and dazai goes missing [Last i heard he disappeared down an elevator shaft or sumn]

Idfk where this au has gone anymore

Yea :)))

Heres one more HC/AU thingy based off somone elses AU that i saw

The persons Au! - The tiger has the ability to steal abilities when astushi eats the ability owner.

My Additon to the AU: Now i hc that as WR atsushi ate someone who had the ability to change size and appearance (maybe a notorious criminal who didnt pay off his mafia debts) so when life got too interesting or dangerous for him he'd change age and looks and just start all over again (and bcs of his tigers regeneration ability, just like with deadpool he's essentially immortal)

This is a rant,its going on tumblr

UGH

My brain is too full :/

i didnt mean to make it this long tbh

Anyway im hoping somone will like my HC's and AU's and appreciate me pls thank u

GN

[glorioustidalwavedefendor]

O.K. I had it with the constant "tumblr is to hard to use for uwu new users ... they are digital natives but can't be expected to learn a new platform whine whine whine ... "

You know why I am on tumblr?

Becasue I could never figure out any of the other platforms

Becasue they where to hard to use for me

They just didn't vibe with teh way my brain works ...

There

And yet tumblr is pretty selfexplanatory to me

Like sorry ... no one took my hand and explaiened thinsg to me ...

So ... Idk ... if it is hard to use for someone ... idk ... maybe this is not the place for them ... just saiyng ...

Maybe they would be happier elsewhere (Becaue that is usually teh kid of person that will coplain about all the clowns in the clown car ... )

Like sorry but if you flee your platform becasue of the way it is ... and then complain that the new platformisn't like the old one ... then maybe YOU are the problem?

But tumblr is in the red ... whine whine whine ...

Yeah ... so maybe they shouldn't alienate their core audience for people that will leafe wenn ever the new hot thing comes along ... they did it before they will do it again ...

I mean how well it workd to throw away their core audience for the generally audience can be seen with marvel ... they alienated their hard core fans ... (aka the peope who make content and promotion for free, watch the same movie n times and get butts in seats ... ) ... and all of a sudden ... they aren't doing so well anymore ( I mean they still make a lot of money ... but not as much as they are used too ... )

Wow ... looks like the generally demographic watches marvel movies wenn they are the new hot shit .. but they will watch other things wenn those things are the hot new shit ...

But no ... it is "super hero fatigue" ...

Well ... I'll bring popcorn to watch "tumblr fatigue" hit ...

the "tumblr is hard to use 🥺" comment from staff is so funny bc like. its not untrue. but the solution isnt to make everything algorithmic, its to stop hiding the FAQ pages deep inside the site. just like. explain shit to new users. a concept. also obviously just fix the search function

[kittykatinabag]

The good news: the mental health nurse practitioner got me an ssri prescription right away with only the usual background questions asked. This time it's fluoxetine (aka prozac) since I told her that escitalopram (aka lexapro) worked but only up until a point and then I plateaued. I tried to explain that the reason I didn't up the dosage on it was because I was afraid of the sleep troubles getting worse since I know they were tied to taking that, but she didn't seem to fully understand that logic. Fair enough I suppose, I'm not a trained medical professional. But yeah we'll take the first pill tomorrow morning as it was too late today when I picked it up to start it.

Bad news: the fucking health insurance is all fucked up right now. I technically do have a plan, but that plan has not sent me the insurance card (or literally any indication that I am in fact on the plan beyond what's on the states health portal). The plan I thought I was on expired at the end of last month because I qualified for more benefits (I think, idk I'm still confused about it). I could call them (and probably will have to), but I might also look into just going in person to the state health insurance people and figuring this out. The only thing is, Monday is a holiday so it would have to be on Tuesday. Mildly annoying. At least goodrx made the prescription only $20. Even though it should be free on my health plan 😒

More mildly annoying news: the nurse practitioner can't meet again until November. And this is telehealth too, not even in person. I did say to her I'm interested in getting back into therapy, but only being able to check in monthly is pretty useless with my memory. Even weekly can be a stretch sometimes.

Also mildly annoyed that I spent like four hours filling out the damn intake paperwork (including two very confusing consent forms for releases of information that I did not understand fully and I hope I filled them out correctly because no one answered my "hey wtf do I write here if I don't have a PCP anymore and have gone to multiple providers for mental health services" email), yet the nurse practitioner didn't even seem to glance at the answers. I know they're required to do the whole intake interview questions to hear it straight from me, but it definitely seemed like it was the first time she was becoming privy to any of that information, even though I went into dumb amounts of detail in the forms. Because I'm literally that tumblr post that says something like "if I just explain it in more detail and clearer and with different words maybe then they'll understand me" so I just keep putting down details. (Kind of like how I just keep writing these life update and opinion posts).

But anyways, ending off with more good news: this weekend is a cat show and I am going to see many many beautiful cats and hopefully remember to take pictures. Very excited about that.