#ahaha first series ever!

[elrondsimp]

Bilbo Baggins X F! reader

“Unnoticed love?” PT1

Being the only girl in the company was undoubtedly challenging, especially as a hobbit. The dwarves had never encountered a hobbit lass before, and they initially hesitated to let Y/n join the journey, fearing she would slow them down with their preference for comfort, specific meal times, and plumper physiques compared to other races. However, Y/n's unwavering determination eventually won them over. She vividly recalled the events that led to their acceptance.

The moon bathed the Shire in its ethereal glow, casting a beautiful blue tint upon the ground. Y/n observed Bilbo cooking and preparing tea for both of them.

"I apologize for missing tea this morning. A wizard tried to recruit me for an adventure, but I declined," Bilbo said, placing a cup of tea in front of Y/n. The sweet aroma wafted towards her face. Bilbo knew exactly how she liked her tea, with a touch of cream and plenty of sugar.

"No need to worry, Bo. I witnessed the interaction on my way to the market," Y/n replied, lifting the cup and taking a small sip, her laughter escaping as she did.

"What's so amusing?" Bilbo asked, curiosity evident in his voice. "Oh, just the expression on your face when you went inside. It's not every day one sees a displeased Bilbo, unless it involves those Sackville-Baggins," Y/n chuckled, picking up one of the sweet treats Bilbo had prepared and taking a bite.

The two of them often shared meals together, almost like a tradition, which had led some of the other hobbits to speculate about their romantic involvement. However, Y/n knew deep down that her feelings were unrequited, despite her yearning for more. If only she could see the way Bilbo looked at her.

Their comfortable silence was shattered by a loud, insistent knocking on the door, startling both hobbits. "Were we expecting company?" Y/n placed her pastry down and stood up. "I don't believe so," Bilbo replied, joining her. He approached the door, hesitant about turning anyone away. What if they needed help? Taking a deep breath, he grasped the doorknob and opened the door. A dwarf stood before them, his features highlighted by the moon's glow, giving his beard a bluish undertone.

"Dwalin, at your service," the dwarf introduced himself, bowing and eyeing both hobbits. The interaction was awkward as he barged in and helped himself to some food, leaving the hobbits dumbfounded. "I guess what they say about dwarves is true," Y/n huffed, observing him devour their food.

Before long, more dwarves arrived, including Balin, the brother of the first dwarf, and two brothers named Fili and Kili. The wizard himself also made an appearance, followed by a swarm of dwarves stumbling over each other as they entered.

Y/n found amusement in watching their squabbles as they struggled to regain their footing. One dwarf tipped his hat and winked at her. "Bofur," he introduced himself, extending his hand, which Y/n shyly shook. "Y/n, a pleasure," she replied in a soft, cautious voice. Bofur placed his other hand on top of hers, grinning. This gesture did not go unnoticed.

The situation escalated when the group began singing, resulting in chaos. They clanged silverware together, tossed food, and spilled wine everywhere. It was a spectacle that surely alerted the neighbors. Y/n attempted to catch plates, while Bilbo desperately tried to prevent further damage, including potential plumbing disasters.

Now in the kitchen, washing the dishes, a young dwarf named Ori approached Y/n. She smiled, looking at his bashful face, as he handed her a plate. "Thank you, Master Dwarf," she said graciously.

Since that fateful night, Y/n found herself surrounded by the dwarves. Initially, there was tension due to her outburst with Thorin, but she felt more at ease with the others. When she wasn't conversing with Bilbo, she would engage in discussions with Bofur or Balin. Bilbo observed from a distance, his stomach churning with a sense of neglect. He couldn't quite pinpoint whether it was jealousy or anger, but he despised the feeling. He would watch Y/n return from the river, her wet hair clinging to her face, her flushed cheeks after a battle, or her cheeks puffing out when she ate. Observing her lick her lips only heightened his desire.

"Are you alright, Master Burglar?" Fili nudged Bilbo, snapping him out of his reverie. "Hm? Yes, I'm quite alright," Bilbo replied, fumbling with his hands, worried that he had been caught staring at his beloved friend. "It must be challenging being away from home, let alone on a perilous mission. But at least you still have some comfort with you," Fili remarked, glancing at Y/n. "I don't know how you manage to stay focused," he continued, his gaze lingering admiringly on her curvaceous figure. Bilbo couldn't blame them; he himself was guilty of such thoughts. He watched Y/n's every move, her hair still damp and sticking to her face as she walked alongside Ori, listening to his rant about his older brothers.

Bilbo's desire for Y/n remained unspoken, buried deep within. One side of him yearned to claim her as his own, to let the world know that she belonged to him. But he knew the truth—she was not his. They weren't courting, which meant she was available for others to pursue. The other side of him simply longed to drag her away into a secluded tent and express his desires, hoping she would reciprocate.

"Bilbo," Thorin's voice echoed, breaking the momentary trance. "Tend to the horses," he commanded. Bilbo sighed, watching Y/n fulfill her duties.

The company continued their journey towards Erebor, which meant passing through Mirkwood—a prospect that displeased Thorin but left him with no alternative. It was no surprise when they were captured by the elves. While the other dwarves underwent thorough searches, the elves were uncertain where to begin searching Y/n. One male elf patted down her sleeves, but that was the extent of it. "Hey! Why are you putting your filthy hands all over us but ignoring her?" Kili exclaimed, but the elf sighed and ignored his question. "We should have hidden our weapons on her," Gloin grumbled. "Excuse me?" Y/n turned her head, astonished by the remark.

They were presented before the king himself, Thranduil. Thorin gritted his teeth, looking beyond him. "Mr. Thorin, are you alright?" Y/n glanced at her leader, witnessing a softening in his gaze when he looked at her. She appeared so vulnerable, restrained—though they all likely did—yet he remained silent.

A gentle hand slid under Y/n's chin, redirecting her attention from Thorin to Thranduil. "Sweet hobbit, what brings you so far from the Shire?" Thranduil cooed, treating her as if she were a child. Y/n remained silent, her mind plagued by numerous

questions. Would everyone be alright? Would she be safe? And, most importantly, where was Bilbo? Unbeknownst to them, he observed everything from his hidden vantage point. He had never seen her look so fragile before, kneeling before a king, beneath someone who wasn't him.

"Are you at a loss for words? No matter, we will take good care of your friends," Thranduil declared before instructing his guards to remove them, leaving the two alone. Bilbo knew he had to act swiftly, despite the heartache it caused him. He had to find a way for them to escape as soon as possible.

Thranduil circled around Y/n, resembling a predator stalking its prey. "You never answered my question. Are you here to reclaim Erebor as well?" His tone carried a taunting quality, as if he couldn't believe a hobbit would willingly leave the comfort of their own home for an adventure. "Release them; they are my friends," Y/n spoke softly. Thranduil chuckled, ceasing his circling motion and kneeling before her. "Friends? Oh, my dear, you are merely a pawn in their game. Once they have the opportunity, they will discard you as if you were nothing," he said, gazing into her eyes. "Oh, little one."

He lightly caressed her cheek, smiling. "I believe it's only fair to say you will be treated much better here. I cannot allow your delicate hands to become even more roughed up than they already are," he remarked, alluding to the skirmish with the giant spiders. "Stay with me," he urged. "No," Y/n replied firmly.

"No?" Thranduil removed his hand from her cheek, repeating her answer. "No?" Rising from his kneeling position, he stared her down. "Why not? Do you truly wish to fight alongside these... these creatures? Oh, my dear, you should learn to choose your battles wisely because...," his voice darkened, "I'm afraid you won't be spared." "I'm doing this for someone I love!" Y/n blurted out. Instead of a chuckle, Thranduil burst into laughter. "You? You love one of the dwarves?" he exclaimed. "It's not the dwarves. It's..." Y/n's voice trailed off. Thranduil sighed, instructing Tauriel to apprehend her alongside the others.

Now sitting alone in a dark and desolate cell, Y/n was left with her thoughts. Worries washed over her, refusing to dissipate. They were trapped, and Bilbo was nowhere to be found. What if he had been devoured by the spiders?

[beloveds-embrace]

hi, this idea kind of comforts me but it makes you feel uncomfy just ignore this request.

but since you do poly 141, I was thinking of a fic where reader comes from a bad abusive family but she doesn't talk about it and thinks it's normal. and the 141 tries to get angry/frustrated with her because they are concerned for the fact she is fine with people treating her badly or not prioritising herself they come to realise it's just how she thinks. and they remind her that she now doesn't have to survive and fade into a background or is a burden and that she can live and be happy.

i know it sounds complicated and specific but I kinda have this really serene picture in my head that if that happens everything will fine AHAHA idk. but again if this idea doesn't correspond with your writing or feeling or comfortability please just ignore this. apologies if it made you feel uncomfortable.

hope you have/had a nice day or night!!♡♡

I hope you have a nice day/night as well!! And i hope you enjoy this! CW: past abuse, past emotional abuse and neglect

You met them first through a mutual friend, an unplanned introduction that turned into something you hadn’t quite expected: a tentative relationship, but one that had happiness blooming like the flowers and greenery you tend to. It was unconventional- a group of elite soldiers who spent most of their time between missions scattered across the world and a civilian- but when they returned, it felt like they brought your home with them.

You still didn’t understand why they liked having you around. You were just a florist who helped them with decorating their new house, or who listened when they needed a friendly ear. You didn’t ask for anything, and they were kind enough not to question it even if you'd seen their displeased little frowns and furrowed brows whenever you'd refuse.

But recently, you noticed them getting… concerned.

It was Soap who brought it up first, his frustration seeping into his usual easy smile.

It happened after you’d offered to run a series of errands, insisting they rest after a mission. As always, you tried to downplay your exhaustion, helping them settle in their home, making sure everything was clean and in order for them before you even considered sitting down.

Soap watched with a frown, noticing how you brushed off the heaviness in your movements and the bags under your eyes, doing your best to tend to them, such a sweet thing. But after you finished, he gently grabbed your arm.

“Dove, why do you do this?” he asked, voice softer than you’d ever heard it.

“Do what?” you replied, a little too quickly, trying to pull your arm back almost instinctively. Almost like a habit.

“Act like you don’t need anything. You haven’t even eaten today, and you’re lookin’ after us like we’re helpless. What about you, aye?”

You stared at him, unsure of what to say. You didn’t know how to explain that putting yourself last was just what you did. That it felt right, somehow, to stay in the background, to make sure everyone else was fine before even thinking about yourself. It was normal, no? It was how you were raised, and your parents only ever insisted that discipline was needed.

“Just… used to it, I guess?” you finally mumbled.

Soap’s brows drew together, but before he could say more, Gaz stepped in, giving you a gentle, worried look. So Johnny... wasn't the only one who thought so?

“It’s not right,” Gaz said, frustration simmering in his tone. “You’re allowed to put yourself first, you know?”

You shrugged, glancing away. Allowed. You hadn’t thought of it that way.

Price was the next to notice it, his observant eyes always catching the little things: how you’d flinch ever so slightly when they raised their voices, the way you stayed at the edges of conversations, nodding along but rarely chiming in. It had been the same when they'd met you, but he had assumed- hoped- it was merely you being naturally shy.

But this clearly went beyond that.

One night, as you were tidying up after dinner, John approached you, folding his arms across his chest. He stands close, but not too close.

“Why don’t you sit with us, love? Someone else can do the dishes. You barely let us help you cook or set the table either.” He says, his voice gentle, but with a hint of a command.

“I’m fine, John. I really don't mind.” You answered quickly, quietly. You couldn’t meet his eyes, a reflex you’d developed over years of keeping your head down.

He tilted his head, as if trying to see past the answer you’d given him. “No, my love,” he said softly, but with a firmness that made you pause. “I think you’re used to telling yourself that, but I don’t think you believe it.”

You froze, unsure how to respond, feeling something painful stir in your chest. The idea of asking for anything, for taking up space- of needing more than what little you had- seemed wrong. Like wanting was a burden in itself. But it is. It's what you've learnt and been taught.

John sighed, his eyes warm but sad. His hands raised to cup you face slowly, gently. “You’re not a burden, you know that, right?”

You gave him a small, shaky smile, one that didn’t quite reach your eyes. “Yeah.”

The next time, it was Ghost.

He was usually silent, lurking in the shadows, watching with that keen, unreadable gaze that only ever softened for you and them. But one evening, as you were dropping off supplies at their base, Ghost noticed you hurrying off after you’d finished. He easily caught up with you just outside, his hand gentle as it grasped your shoulder.

(Yet it still had you flinching.)

“You don’t have to go, birdie.” He murmured, voice soft but clear. You met his gaze, startled by the gentle concern in his eyes.

“You… don’t mind?” you asked, trying not to look too hopeful. You always worried your company might be too boring, unproductive. Unwanted.

Ghost shook his head. “If anything, we mind when you don’t stay,” he scoffed quietly. Then he sighs. “We’re worried, you know. About how you treat yourself, luvie. Like you don’t deserve anything more than the bare minimum.”

You swallowed hard, his words hitting deeper than you’d care to admit. He waited, patient, a pillar of quiet understanding.

“I just… it’s what I know,” you finally whispered, unable to look at him. “Growing up, I was never… important. And I don't have to be! I'm not demanding it, I promise-”

He was silent for a moment, and then he took in a deep breath that cuts your frantic mumbles off, as if finally understanding something he’d long suspected. “Well,” he said, his voice a low rumble, “you’re with us now, birde. You are important.”

Something warm spread in your chest, something unfamiliar yet comforting. You managed a nod, finding a small sliver of strength in his words, and a little smile forms on your face- leaning into Ghost's knuckles so lightly caressing your cheek.

After those days, things began to change more and more. For the better.

Kyle would check in with you every day, insisting you take breaks with him, sharing laughs over simple things. Soap began inviting you to meals, not taking no for an answer, piling food on your plate until you couldn’t help but indulge. Those two especially adored taking you out to sample new cuisines, delighting in getting you to be more open with your expressions and reactions.

John and Simon would go on walks with you, listening to the little stories you’d been hesitant to share, showing you that your presence mattered to them as much as theirs did to you. And slowly, day by day, they chipped away at the walls you’d built around yourself. Showed you that what your family raised to be wasn't right, was cruel to you.

One evening, as you sat on the couch in the common room, leaning against Johnny's shoulder, Kyle leaned over, a gentle smile on his face.

“You know, love, you don’t have to survive anymore,” he said softly, meeting your gaze with a warmth that made your heart ache. “We want you here because you make us happy. Just as you are.”

The words felt foreign, but you let them settle over you, warm and safe. Kyle gave your hand a gentle squeeze, reassuring, a silent reminder that you didn’t need to hide.

“We’re here to take care of each other,” Soap murmured, his arm wrapping around your shoulders, “and that means you too, aye?”

You gave them a tentative smile, feeling that familiar ache soften just a little.

Simon, sitting nearby, nodded in silent agreement, and John leaned back in his chair, giving you a small, proud smile. “You’re one of us, love,” John said quietly, his voice steady. “And as long as you’re here, you’re part of this family. We won't just let you fade into the background. That isn't fair to a dove like you.”

And looking at them now, at the love and gentleness they held for you, it wasn't hard to believe their words.

Maybe, just maybe, you’d finally found a place where you belonged.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

── THE GLASS PRINCESS // SIX

Series Synopsis: You wake up in a strange room with no memories, broken glass at your bedside, and a prince named Zuko as your only chance at figuring out who you really are.

Chapter Synopsis: Two separate encounters with two different Firebenders yield revelations of the sort you are unprepared to face.

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Zuko x Reader

Chapter Word Count: 8.4k

Content Warnings: complicated relationships (strangers to friends to lovers to enemies to strangers to lovers to enemies to lovers), amnesia, alternate universe, lots of secrets and lying and mystery

A/N: i have been writing like crazy recently AHAHA but anyways apologies in advance to anyone expecting anything different from this 😫

“I’m so sad that the break is over. It wasn’t nearly long enough,” Jia-Li said as the two of you returned to your room for the first time since you had left it for Ember Island.

“Our beds look a lot smaller in comparison to the ones on Ember Island,” you said. Jia-Li snorted.

“That’s for sure. And did the room shrink while we were gone?” she said.

“It definitely looks like it,” you said. “At least we don’t have class until tomorrow.”

“Do you think Ty Lee is back yet?” she said. “We should go to the market. It’ll be fun.”

“I should probably do some reading so that I’m ready for tomorrow,” you said.

“Don’t be a spoilsport! I doubt you forgot anything in the short time we were gone, seriously. You’ll be okay if you skip out on reading for one day and come enjoy yourself with the rest of us,” Jia-Li said.

You gave the stack of books on your desk a longing look before nodding firmly, knowing Jia-Li was right, and furthermore that Ty Lee would agree with her. It was just as important for you to socialize as it was for you to study hard, and going to the market wasn’t so time-consuming that it would leave you unable to do anything for the rest of the day.

“Alright, but only if you don’t complain about me reading tonight,” you said. “The book I’m on currently is really interesting.”

“What’s it about?” Jia-Li said.

“The history of Ba Sing Se,” you said. “Since I was found there, I thought that learning more about it might spark some memories in me. All things considered, it’s not as boring as one might expect. The chapter I’m about to start is on the royal family and the construction of the palace.”

“To be honest, I don’t see how you find that so fascinating, but if that’s what you like, then who am I to stop you? Sure, you can leave the candle burning a bit longer in order to finish your chapter if we get back too late,” she said.

“Thanks,” you said. “You are the best roommate ever.”

“You flatter me,” she said. “Open up, Ty Lee!”

“What if Kaho is the one at the door?” you said, grabbing her hand to stop her from continuing to bang on it. Jia-Li huffed at you.

“She’s not going to be back until the evening. Don’t you remember how much she was bragging about having to stay late to submit her official reports from the meeting and all of that?” she said. You let go of her hand, for you did remember that. Once freed, Jia-Li continued to knock.

“Coming!” a muffled voice said, and then the door was swinging open to reveal Ty Lee, who was standing on her hands for some reason. “Ursa! Jia-Li! What are you guys doing here?”

“We wanted to ask you if you would come to the market with us,” you said, twisting your neck so that she would come into proper perspective. To your chagrin, it did nothing but make you dizzy, so you gave up and decided to just look down on her upside-down visage.

“Sure!” she said, rocking herself onto her feet and standing properly. “How were your breaks?”

“They were good,” Jia-Li said. “Very relaxing, but way too short.”

“We did see you at one point,” you reminded her. Ty Lee giggled.

“Right, at that stupid party! I heard you guys ended up partaking in the festivities, if you’re catching my meaning,” she said.

“Yes, that’s right,” you said. Jia-Li grinned, flames dancing in her palm before she curled her fist and extinguished them.

“It was fun,” she said. “You were on to something, Ty Lee. It was exactly what we needed.”

“Jia-Li’s brother was not happy with us when he found out,” you said. “But it’s fine. He’ll make up with her, I’m sure, and as for me…it’s fine if we never speak again.”

“Onto the next,” Jia-Li said. “It’s alright. You win some, you lose some.”

“Exactly,” you agreed. “What about you? What were you up to when you weren’t on Ember Island?”

“Strategizing with Azula, mostly,” Ty Lee said. “You know, she killed the Avatar around when Zuko took over Ba Sing Se.”

“Really?” you said. Ty Lee nodded.

“Yup, I saw it myself! He was about to go all glowy-white-eyes on her, and she just shot him with lightning before he could,” she said.

Killing an Avatar as a normal person was unheard of, and Princess Azula wasn’t even a master yet. She was clearly a prodigy, but you knew from Ty Lee that she was still training, though her training was so advanced that it was theoretically impossible for normal Firebenders such as Jia-Li and even Kaho to accomplish. The fact that she had done something as legendary as defeating an Avatar without full mastery of her element spoke to her skill and talents, and you swore then and there to never get on her bad side.

“That’s insane,” Jia-Li said. “I always knew she was on another level from the rest of us, but I didn’t realize until now just how large that skill gap was.”

“Mhm, but for some reason, she’s gotten to be crazy paranoid recently. She’s convinced that he’s not really dead, and she’s been losing sleep over it,” Ty Lee said. “It’s tainting her victory, and she’s been meeting with Mai and I nonstop on what we should do in case he proves to be alive.”

“It’s better to be prepared than not,” you said. “Though she probably doesn’t have much to worry about. If the Avatar was alive, he probably would’ve made himself known, don’t you think? I doubt it would be easy for an Airbender to hide himself, especially not one as powerful as the Avatar surely is.”

“That’s what I’ve been telling her, but she’s still worried,” Ty Lee said. “So my break was mostly work, except for that one weekend on Ember Island.”

“That’s a shame,” Jia-Li said.

“Next break, I’m going to sleep the entire time,” Ty Lee vowed. “Every day I’m at the school serves as a reminder of why I dropped out in the first place, and I need my body and aura to recover from this kind of environment.”

“I always forget you did that,” you said.

“Why’d you come back?” Jia-Li said. “It’s obvious you hate it here, and you have a place in the palace already, so it’s not as though you’re going to climb the ranks socially by attending.”

“Simple! I’m here to keep an eye on Ursa!” Ty Lee said. “Not that she needs it, but Prince Zuko asked me to come along and help her acclimate to the environment of the academy, since we weren’t sure if she’d be able to handle it or not.”

“That’s a lot more logical than you suddenly developing a passion for the scholarly pursuits, which is what I had previously thought was the reasoning,” Jia-Li said.

“I don’t think I’ll ever develop that,” Ty Lee said, wrinkling her nose. “I’ll leave the academic stuff to Ursa.”

“Me, too,” Jia-Li said.

“Hey, come on, guys. Reading is fun,” you said, though it was obviously unconvincing, as both of them made faces at you. “Or not, I guess.”

“Let’s stop talking about school, please,” Ty Lee said. “It’s bad enough that we have classes tomorrow. We don’t need to ruin our free time by thinking about them now, too!”

“It’s not a problem for me,” Jia-Li said. “Maybe Ursa will have some difficulty, though.”

“Shut up! No, I won’t!” you said. “You won’t hear me speaking about school for the rest of the outing.”

“Does that include whenever you drop your random little factoids to explain whatever’s going on at any given time?” Jia-Li said.

“Hopefully not,” Ty Lee said. “I’d be way too confused without her narrating everything.”

“True,” Jia-Li said. “Okay, you can talk about those, but no more explicit mentions of the academy. Or of reading. Or of other things along those lines.”

“I already agreed!” you said. “Honestly, you guys have such a low opinion of me. Anyways, do either of you have anything specific to get at the market, or are we just wandering around?”

“Maybe I’ll get a new hair ribbon, but I’m not particularly attached to the idea, so I’m alright no matter where we go,” Jia-Li said.

“I don’t have anything I need, so we can go look at the hair ribbon stalls if you want, Jia-Li,” Ty Lee said.

“It’s the same for me,” you said. “Besides, it’s not like I really have money to spend, which means I’ll just admire the different shops, so I have no particular preference for where we go. Lead the way, Jia-Li; you’d know the market best, anyways.”

“Ty Lee probably knows it pretty well, too,” Jia-Li said.

“Nope, I ran away to join the circus, remember? I haven’t been here for a while! Even when I came back to the palace, I was always with Azula and Mai, and they’re not really the type to enjoy walking around the market, so it’s been a bit,” Ty Lee said.

“Then it really is up to me,” Jia-Li said, straightening her shoulders and nodding firmly. “Follow me, girls!”

You and Ty Lee marched after Jia-Li as she strode towards a stall decorated with hair ribbons of every shade. Some were patterned the way Kaho’s was, whereas others were solid-colored, like the one Jia-Li tended to wear. All of them were beautiful, richly made and finely dyed, and you could not help running your fingers over a few of them in appreciation.

“What do you think of this one?” Jia-Li said, holding up a red ribbon that had white flowers embroidered on it. “The one I have right now is so plain.”

“It’s very nice,” you said.

“I like it!” Ty Lee said. “You should get it.”

“Do you think so? Let’s see. How much is this for?” Jia-Li said. As she began to argue with the merchant about the price, you found yourself wandering off, observing the hustle and bustle of the marketplace, the different vendors and their goods, the mothers with their little children rifling through their purses full of gold coins, the serious soldiers standing at attention in uniform — and the not so serious ones with their helmets off and tucked under their arms as they talked to each other. Though the market was so large in scale, it was more like a collection of small, intimate snapshots of domesticity than a grand, epic portrait woven together out of perfectly conjoined parts.

There were so many different stories happening at once. People cried and laughed and argued and bantered on these streets. They lived their lives, unknowing of what would happen to them next or what those at their sides were going through. It was one of those mundane sort of miracles, the sort that were so commonplace that nobody would find them miraculous unless they stepped back and thought about them for a moment.

“Did you hear the news?” someone said to you. You tilted your head at the woman, who had her hand held in front of her mouth politely. “Apparently, there’s a prisoner on the loose!”

“What? In the capital?” you said. She nodded.

“Word has it that he deserted the army during the fall of Ba Sing Se and was promptly captured by Prince Zuko, who sent him to prison. But now he’s escaped! It’s all so frightening,” she said. “Be careful. You’re a student at the academy, aren’t you? My daughter is in her first year there, so I recognized the uniform. You should hurry back to the campus — it’s much safer there.”

“Thank you for the warning,” you said. “I hope you stay safe as well, madam.”

It had been an odd encounter, but for some reason, it wasn’t the random nature of the conversation that made you uneasy. Such things happened at markets, and especially because you apparently went to school with her daughter, it made sense that she had approached you. No, it was the story itself that you were worried about.

The History Mistress had never mentioned anyone deserting the army, besides the former General Iroh. That meant that this escaped prisoner, whoever they were, must’ve been some foot soldier so unimportant that they were not even worthy of the simplest sentence in your lectures, but that begot another question — how had a simple foot soldier escaped a Fire Nation prison?

The haggard man in front of you walked with a limp, and the exposed skin that you could see was littered with scars. Unlike what you would’ve assumed, though, the scars were clearly not from burns. They were cuts, deep lacerations that stood out red and furious against his arms, his neck, his ankles and even his face.

He must’ve been in a terrible battle, but for some reason, no one paid him any mind. The crowds parted around him before melting back together, like he had never been there in the first place. It was only you that followed, you who was entranced, matching his every step with your own. There was some burning desire in you that needed to follow him. You couldn’t place it, couldn’t understand its origin or any part of its existence, but you just knew you had to fulfill it. So you went after the man, growing steadily closer and closer until you could hear what he was muttering to himself.

“Gave everything…fought for that damn prince…what does it get me? Going to kill that girl. Going to kill that girl. What does it get me? Gave everything for that damn prince. Going to kill her. I have to kill her,” he said, over and over, repeating the same phrases on loop.

“Excuse me, sir, but are you alright?” you said when the two of you reached a dead end and the man stood still, facing the wall, continuing to say the same breathless things.

“I knew it,” he said. “I knew someone was following me. We Soldiers of Agni, we know these things.”

“Soldiers of Agni?” you said. The man still did not turn around, pressing his hands against the stone wall and resting his forehead against it. “They’re all dead, sir. They fell during the invasion of Ba Sing Se.”

“And don’t I know it!” the man said. “We gave everything for that prince, and what did it lead us to? Death! Death, you foolish girl, all of my comrades are dead! I’m the only one who survived that wench’s onslaught, but instead of being treated as the hero I am, I was renounced as a traitor. Prince Zuko took my status as a Soldier of Agni away, and he threw me in some dungeon to rot. Tell me how that’s fair!”

“I think you’re confused, sir,” you said, stepping away from him, questioning your own instincts for landing you into this situation. Because this was definitely the prisoner that the woman had been talking about, and since that was the case, you were almost certainly in danger. “Prince Zuko would never do something like that. He is a kind and just person. He even saved me!”

He spun around. “He saved — you!”

Before you knew it, there was a blast of fire heading directly for you. You barely leapt out of the way and readied yourself to fight, but even if the prisoner was telling the truth and he really had once been a Soldier of Agni, his reflexes and musculature had faded during his time locked away. No matter how much he tried, nothing but wisps of smoke escaped his hands, and he shouted in fury before rushing at you.

“What are you doing?” you said as you began to run as well.

“I’m going to kill you!” he said, his voice breaking as he did so. “You took everything from me, so I’m going to kill you!”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about!” you said in distress. “I’m just a student at the Royal Fire Academy! I haven’t taken anything from anyone!”

“Is that where you are now, you sly witch?” he spat. “It wasn’t enough for you to destroy us all? You have to infiltrate our nation, too? Get out of here, scum!”

“What are you saying?” you said.

“My comrades are dead because of you,” he said. “I’m in prison because of you. I have to — I have to get justice. If that Agni-damned Prince Zuko really did save you, if he really is just letting you walk around and pretend to be one of us, then the Fire Nation is doomed. I have to do what I must for my country! In the name of Fire Lord Ozai, I will kill you, once and for all!”

“Huh?” you said. “I was a prisoner in Ba Sing Se! I don’t have the faintest clue how I could’ve killed your comrades.”

“That’s rich, coming from you. You don’t have to lie in front of me. I was there, wench. I know what you really are,” he said.

“And what might that be?” you said, skidding to a stop before you crashed into a wall and turning to face him, getting into the hand-to-hand combat stance that you had been trained to adopt at the academy.

“The—” Before he could finish, his eyes widened, and then he was falling over. It was Ty Lee; she had jabbed her fingers into his pressure points in a quick but familiar succession, and now she was standing over him, disapproval etched on her face.

“Ursa! There you are!” Jia-Li said, rounding the corner and almost tripping over the fallen man. “Who is that?”

“He’s an escaped prisoner,” you said. “He claimed he used to be one of the Soldiers of Agni.”

“I thought they were all dead, though?” Jia-Li said.

“They are,” Ty Lee said. “He must’ve been rambling about nothing.”

“Definitely,” Jia-Li said. “What Soldier of Agni would just faint like that for no reason?”

“It wasn’t exactly for no reason. I used my chi-blocking to take him out!” Ty Lee said.

“Chi-blocking?” Jia-Li said as the man groaned, beginning to wake up.

“It’s a pretty useful skill,” Ty Lee said. “All sorts of applications. It can temporarily take away bending, incapacitate people, and more! It’s the way for nonbenders like me to level the playing field and stand a chance even against the strongest of benders.”

“That’s why you aren’t afraid of Kaho!” Jia-Li said.

“Yup!” Ty Lee said.

“Who are you girls?” the man said groggily, pushing himself to his feet.

“I thought you knew who I was?” you said. “You said so yourself!”

“How would he know who you are?” Jia-Li said.

“No idea, but he seemed pretty sure just a second ago,” you said.

“For some reason, I think I do,” the man said. “But I don’t know how or why. There’s just a blank spot in my memories. I can’t — I can’t remember anything.”

“That’s strange,” Jia-Li said.

“He must’ve hit his head when he fell,” Ty Lee said.

“Right,” you said, though when she stooped over to pick the man up and bring him to the nearby soldiers, you narrowed your eyes at her.

You knew that chi-blocking sequence. You knew it well, because Ty Lee had used it on you before, still used it on you even now. You had never questioned it much, never found any merit in doing so. Ty Lee was infamous for being an airhead, so you had always put the strange ritual down as another one of her oddities. But what if it wasn’t? There was no way that the man had hit his head hard enough to forget everything so quickly, especially not when he had been so confident only seconds prior.

The more likely scenario was that Ty Lee had somehow blocked his memories when she had blocked his chi. It made the most sense, but if that really was the case, then what motive did she have to do the same for you? It was uncomfortable thinking about it, but you couldn’t stop the question from reverberating around your mind for the rest of the day.

Was Ty Lee the reason you didn’t remember anything?

That night, when Jia-Li was asleep and you were getting ready to settle in bed yourself, there was a knock on your door. Quickly blowing out the candle and making sure that the door was locked, you leapt into your bed and pulled the covers over your head, squeezing your eyes shut and pretending to be fast asleep.

“Ursa?” It was Ty Lee. “Are you awake?”

You knew what she was there for. It was about the time for her to — if your assumption was correct — block your chi, and possibly your memories. You had never protested, and you didn’t want her to grow suspicious of you in case that led to her taking even more drastic measures, but you also knew you had to avoid her for the time being if you ever wanted to remember who you were.

Just for a couple of days. You only had to stay away from her for a couple of days, and if nothing changed, then you would return to her side and act as if you both were friends once more.

“Are you and Ty Lee fighting?” Jia-Li said the next morning. You were currently suffering from a massive migraine, massaging your temples as you tried to block the light from hitting your eyes, but you managed to shake your head in the negative.

“No, we’re not,” you said. “Why?”

“You didn’t talk to her all morning, and you sat next to me instead of her, the way you usually do. I think she was a little sad about it,” Jia-Li said.

“I just have a really bad headache,” you said.

“Do you need to go to the infirmary?” Jia-Li said. “If you can’t handle class, I’ll tell the Etiquette Mistress. You’re already her favorite pupil, so she shouldn’t mind.”

“No, I’ll go,” you said, knowing that it was of the utmost importance that you didn’t go anywhere alone. It would be an opportunity for Ty Lee to chi-block you again, one you did not need to create, not if you wanted your experiment to be successful. “I’m sure I’ll get over it with something to drink.”

Yet, despite the cups upon cups of water you chugged, it didn’t do anything to dissipate your headache. It was like there was someone pushing on your brow, crushing your head together, the heaviness seeping down behind your eyes and into your jaw. You thought you might be close to implosion, but there was never a moment of relief. The pressure just kept mounting and mounting until you really did wish for someone to take a hammer to your skull and break it open so that you could finally be freed from the pain.

“Ursa, Jia-Li,” Kaho said as you entered the classroom, her voice filled with venom. “I can’t believe you’re daring to show your faces today.”

“Why wouldn’t we?” you said, far too preoccupied with your migraine to temper your irritation with your usual politeness. “We’re students at the academy, the same as you, Kaho.”

“I thought you might be ashamed of yourself after your performance during the break, at Ember Island,” she said.

“What performance?” you said.

“You destroyed my house!” she said. “I know you all did. You and that group of losers from the beach, whoever they were. My brother told me all about it.”

“Your brother’s the biggest fool I’ve ever met,” you said. “Followed closely by Ruon-Jian. Neither of them recognized the prince and princess even when they were right in front of them.”

“Don’t call my brother a fool,” she said.

“It must be a familial trait,” you continued.

“Ursa, what are you doing?” Jia-Li said.

“I have way too much of a headache to deal with her squealing right now,” you said harshly. “Chan is an idiot and we helped destroy her house. It’s true, but it matters little to me, and I wish she’d just go and wallow in her misery somewhere far from where I am!”

“You’re playing with fire,” Jia-Li fretted. “Quite literally.”

“Can you just leave me alone for once, Kaho?” you said.

“You think you’re so much better than me, don’t you?” Kaho said. “You’ve taken my spot as the top student, and you’re favored by Prince Zuko, so you believe that makes you my superior. But there’s one thing that you’ll never have.”

“And what might that be? An insufferable attitude, or a particularly hideous—” you were cut off by Jia-Li slapping her hand over your mouth.

“She doesn’t know what she’s saying,” Jia-Li apologized. “The migraine is making her delirious.”

Kaho ignored her, staring directly at you, the anger which she was so well-known for blazing to life in her irises. It was the same way she had glared at you after defeating that one underclassman in an Agni Kai. It was the same way she glared at you every time you corrected her in class or got a better result than her on an exam. It was the same way she glared at you whenever you received a letter from Prince Zuko while in the dining hall.

She hated you. You had known this for some time, but you had never understood it until that moment. Kaho despised everything you were, but more than that, she despised that she was jealous of you. She was used to everything going her way, and yet, here you were, a girl who had no memories and no background and no bloodline, taking without difficulty everything that was once hers.

It should never have been yours. To Kaho, you were nobody, a girl from rubble who stole everything from the rightfully deserving. And now here you were, insulting her in front of everyone, clearly rising above the place she had designated for you in her mind. It was an offense of the highest order, and in that instant, you came to the conclusion that you would not escape unpunished. Kaho would no longer allow you to walk over her without retaliation.

“Firebending,” Kaho said. “That’s what I have, and I will always, always be your better, because you can’t even bend.”

“Maybe not,” you said, swallowing and then deciding that if you were already doomed, you might as well have the last word. “It makes it more embarrassing for you, though, doesn’t it? That a nonbender has beat you so thoroughly in everything else? That you can only cling to your bending to maintain your sense of superiority?”

“That’s it,” Kaho said. “You know what I’m going to say, don’t you?”

“You’ve really done it now, Ursa,” Jia-Li groaned. “Don’t even think of asking me to be your proxy. I don’t have a death wish.”

“I do,” you said. “And I’ll save you the trouble. I challenge you to an Agni Kai, Kaho.”

If an Agni Kai was declared, classes were suspended so that the school could watch. Though they were so brutal in nature, they were actually encouraged by the administration, as they served to weed out the weaker students, leaving behind only the strongest, the best of the best.

At present, the field where you and Kaho were going to fight was utterly cleared, though staff and students alike gathered on the edges to watch the event. It had been anticipated for some time, this clash between the two top students of the academy, even if one of them couldn’t Firebend.

“You’re seriously not even calling a proxy?” Jia-Li said.

“Who would I call?” you said, rolling your shoulders. “She’s beaten every girl at this academy already, and I’m not about to beg the prince to save me.”

“Let go of your pride for once and do exactly that!” Jia-Li said. “You couldn’t even take me in a fight, so you can just forget about facing Kaho.”

“Actually, she can manage,” Ty Lee said grimly. You didn’t know where she had come from, but there she stood, her face set, her posture stiff. “Ursa. I don’t know why he said it, but for some reason, Zuko seemed to think that you were strong. Stronger than the rest of us, in fact.”

“He told me as much,” you said. “I don’t know why he said it, either, but for some reason, I don’t think he was lying. At least, he seemed to really believe it, which means there must be some thought behind it all.”

“It doesn’t matter if you’re a prodigy with weapons on par with Master Piandao himself!” Jia-Li said. “Against someone like Kaho, you either need to be a bender or have unusual skills the way Ty Lee does. Can you claim either of those things?”

“I don’t know, Jia-Li,” you said. “I don’t think so. Yet I have to do this all the same. She’s gone unchecked for far too long.”

“And you’ll be the one to check her?” Jia-Li said, throwing her hands up in the air. “I wish you had just gone to the infirmary like I had told you to!”

“Let’s go, Jia-Li,” Ty Lee said. “It’s time. Good luck, Ursa.”

Another pang. You forced yourself to smile through the pain, not wanting to show weakness right when you were about to get into a fight. Ty Lee smiled back, though Jia-Li did not muster the same energy, wailing despondently about how she was going to lose another roommate as Ty Lee dragged her off the field.

“This is your last chance, Ursa,” Kaho said. “If you fall to your knees and grovel, if you accept your place in this world, and if you renounce your ties with the royal family, then I will spare you.”

“I cannot do either of those things,” you said. “And you cannot ask me to.”

“I will not be gentle,” Kaho warned. “I was kind in my last Agni Kai, so perhaps you think that you will get off in a similarly unharmed way. If that is the case, then I want you to know that you are wrong. I will burn my victory into your skin so deeply that you can never look into the mirror without being reminded of the day you angered the wrong person.”

“My head is already full of pain, nearly to the bursting,” you said. “What is one more wound? Do your worst, Kaho. Even if I lose today, I will still have won in the end.”

“And how is that?” Kaho said. You grinned at her.

“Because I’ve shown everyone else at this academy exactly the sort of person you are,” you said. “You can’t beat a nonbender at anything else, so you have to challenge them to an Agni Kai in order to cling to the last threads of your former glory. You’re really very pathetic, and no matter how thoroughly you burn me, you can’t change that.”

“Did no one ever teach you to hold your tongue?” Kaho said, taking a deep breath, fire flickering at her fingertips.

“Certainly, at some point, someone must have,” you said. “But I shouldn’t know when or who or what the purpose of the lesson was. Don’t you recall that I have no memories?”

No one could say that Kaho wasn’t talented. The way she used her Firebending was like an extension of herself, as brutal and efficient as her clinical personality. It wasn’t that she was incredibly powerful �� she just did not waste even a drop of energy, focusing her entire being into her forms, which were done with a clear accuracy that was difficult to dodge.

She punched a lick of fire at you, deadly hot, the air shimmering in the aftermath of it as it dissipated into nothingness, barely avoiding singing the edges of your clothes. You employed every trick you had learnt, for the longer you could draw out the fight, the worse it looked for her.

It was a game that you could not win. It was a game you were destined to lose, but — and maybe this was your past knowledge speaking — you had to play along. The outcome was determined, but you still had to play.

“Why did you come here?” Kaho screamed, her careful control slipping the more times she missed burning you. It was like her words drove a knife through your head, and the only reason your faltering was not a fatal blunder was because she, too, was growing more and more errant in her strikes. “Why are you doing this to me?”

“You’re the one trying to immolate me!” you said, sweat pouring from your brow, your shirt sticking to your collarbones and your pants clinging to your legs. “Why don’t you raise that question to yourself?”

“You!” she said. “Why are you speaking so elegantly? Are you mocking me?”

“Of all the things, you choose to criticize my manner of speaking? Your sense of prioritization is as horrid as your personality,” you said.

More fire. This time, the hem of your shirt did catch alight, but you put it out before it could reach your skin, so it didn’t count as a first burn. It did, however, mean two things: you were getting tired, and Kaho was losing even more of her composure.

“You came here,” she said. “I was alright before! But you came here and decided that everything I had was yours. My place in society, my standing in the school…the happy ending I was born to inherit has all gone to you!”

“Happy ending?” you said. “Do you think I care about something as superficial and fantastical as that? I don’t even have a beginning! Have you ever taken a second thought about your hatred? You can choose the direction of your life, Kaho. Whether happy or sad or anything in between, you know who you are. I do not have such a luxury. You resent my friendship with the prince, but if I do not have him, I have nothing left of my past! I helped destroy your house, yes, but at least you have a house — and it was only one of many. I don’t even have a shack in the woods to call my own!”

“Exactly,” Kaho said. “You should be begging on the streets, yet you are here. But no longer. No longer will I allow you to exist beside me, as if we are equals.”

Your eyes widened as her words sank in. This wasn’t just an Agni Kai anymore. She would not stop once she burnt you. It didn’t matter how completely; you had been wagering that you could eventually heal from whatever she inflicted on you. But, according to Kaho, she was not planning on you ever healing. She was planning on you dying.

Without Kaho’s fire, the air was almost cold. Goosebumps raised on your bare arms, though whether it was from chill or fright, you were not sure. Kaho was incredibly still, her eyes closed as she inhaled deeply, centering herself, drawing strength from the core of her bending — her breath. Everyone else was silent, though you thought you could hear someone, perhaps Jia-Li, repeating a prayer to Agni frantically, begging him to protect you from Kaho’s wrath.

You did no such thing. There was a voice in your head, whispering past the pain, telling you that Agni was not your god. You could not pray to him. You could not pray to a lord of destruction. You could not pray to the deity who had ruined your home.

You did not question this voice, though by all rights it was contrary to the little you knew of yourself. You were a Fire Nation soldier. Agni had not ruined your home, he had saved it. He was the one whose banner you had fought under. He was the one whose name you had been tortured in. He was your patron.

No. He was not. He was Kaho’s. He was Zuko’s. He was Jia-Li’s. But you were not a Firebender. You were something else. What? It was inexplicable, but your bones resonated with that truth as the effects of Ty Lee’s continuous chi-blocking began to crumble, your headache finally alleviating as you had your first breakthrough.

Kaho opened her eyes, and then fire gathered in her palms. You stood your ground this time, rooting yourself into the dirt of the field, and as a wave of fire rolled towards you, destroying everything in its path, you cringed back and screwed your eyelids together but refused to move. This time, you would not move.

Right when the blistering temperature got to be too much, it was cut off, asphyxiated before its source could reach you. Then Kaho was hurling insults at you, calling you a mongrel, a filthy half-breed, a daughter of mud. You cracked your eyes open, wondering why she did not attack you once more, why she had ceased her assault at the instant before she would have won for certain.

There was a large wall of stone erected before you, shielding you from Kaho, impenetrable by even the hottest of fires, which certainly she did not possess. That wall had not been there before, and the names which Kaho was calling you suddenly made sense — because you had created the wall. It was yours.

You were an Earthbender.

Within seconds, every single person that had borne witness to the Agni Kai was slumped over on the ground, including Kaho herself. Ty Lee used her momentum to flip over the wall, dropping to her feet before you and crossing her arms.

“You knew,” you said. “The entire time, you knew.”

“No,” she said. “Not exactly.”

“You’re the one who’s been blocking my memories, though,” you said. “Right? You would block my chi so that I couldn’t remember my past or use my Earthbending.”

“That’s right,” she said, bowing her head. She seemed apologetic, but nothing resembling pity filled you. The only emotion you could muster was disgust.

“Why?” you said. “What could have convinced you to do something like that? I thought we were friends, Ty Lee. Was that all a lie? Were you only staying close to me so that you could keep suppressing my memories?”

“No!” she said. “That was the reason at first, but I like spending time with you, Ursa. You really are one of my friends.”

She reached out as if to embrace you, but you took a step backwards so that she could not. She pulled back as if you had wounded her.

“My name isn’t Ursa, is it?” you said. “Who am I really, Ty Lee? Tell me the truth.”

“I have no idea,” she said. “He didn’t tell me anything about you. He just said it was for the best if you didn’t remember anything. I was so afraid the whole time, I thought Azula might be angry if she found out, but he was always so kind to me when I was younger that I thought I owed him at least this one favor…”

“Who?” you said. “Who is he? Who demanded you keep my memories from me?”

She gave you a miserable look. “Zuko.”

“That liar,” you said. It wasn’t just anger for the specific betrayal; there was some old rage quivering in you. You hated him. You hated him. You couldn’t say why, but you hated him. The ground shook, and Ty Lee glanced around nervously, but you paid her no mind. “He lied to me! He pretended like he cared, but the whole time, he was the one who did it! It’s his fault that I’m like this!”

“Don’t be angry,” Ty Lee pleaded. “I’m sure he had a reason. Just talk to him, and I’m sure he’ll explain!”

“Explain?” you said. “I don’t want to hear his explanations. I want him to pay for what he did!”

Another stake driven into your mind. It was your chi, you presumed, chipping away at the place where your memories were stored. There was still nothing concrete, but a sense of claustrophobia was creeping over you. You weren’t supposed to be here. You were supposed to be somewhere else. You were supposed to be doing something, but Zuko — Zuko had snatched you away from that fate.

“Ursa,” Ty Lee said.

“Stop calling me that,” you said. “It’s not who I am.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t know what else to call you,” she said, clearly near tears. “Please calm down for a little bit. I blocked everyone’s chi in time; no one will remember this happened, so take the moment to settle and think things over. There’s no rush.”

“You can’t just do that,” you said. “You can’t keep blocking people’s memories at whim. They’re not yours to play with like that. Anyways, won’t they remember again? Are you really going to go around once a week and block everyone’s chi?”

“I was quick enough, and it was a small enough memory, that just one time will be sufficient,” she said. “No one will know what you’ve done, and I promise I won’t block your memories again if you stay.”

“I can’t trust you,” you said, straining with all your might to drive the stone wall back into the ground. “I’m sorry, but I really can’t.”

Dust flew up everywhere, but once it cleared, the field looked placid and undisturbed — barring, of course, the scorch marks left in the wake of Kaho’s attacks.

“What are you going to do now?” she said.

“I’m going to my room,” you said. “You can go ahead and tell Zuko I can Earthbend again. I’m sure you’ve been keeping him updated this entire time, so I won’t stop you.”

“He’ll want to come visit you,” Ty Lee said. And, because you did not want her to get in trouble, because despite what she had done there was still fondness for her buried deep within you, you only sighed and then nodded.

“Then he’ll do just that, I’d expect,” you said. “Goodbye, Ty Lee.”

You weren’t sure if she knew what you meant by the farewell. Maybe she did. For her own sake, you hoped she did not, or at least that she pretended that that was the case. She had in the end only been a tool of Zuko’s, so though you did not forgive her, you did not hate her, either.

Perhaps by a stroke of good fortune or perhaps by design, Jia-Li did not return to the room before dinner. This allowed you to collect your meager possessions, shoving them in the bag you had brought with you to Ember Island. Changing out of your uniform, you bit your lip before placing it in the trash. It was beyond salvaging, and besides, your time as Ursa was over. Now, you had to leave behind the life that the prince had created for you and figure out who you were, what your own life was like.

Fastening a cloak over your shoulders and tossing the hood up over your head to further disguise yourself, you slunk through the dormitory, staying in the shadows and hiding whenever people passed. In that manner, you managed to escape detection, reaching the academy’s aviary before anyone noticed you.

“Bian,” you whispered to your messenger hawk. She was instantly awake, cocking her head at you. You shook your own at her in the negative. “I don’t have a letter for you. There’s no one left for me to write to. I just wanted to tell you something: I’m leaving.”

Even if Bian had once been meant to be Prince Zuko’s, you had difficulty thinking of her as anything but yours. She was your friend, yourhawk, and though she was of the Fire Nation, of your time as Ursa, you could not let her go without saying farewell first, the way you would with the rest of it.

“I can’t tell anyone else,” you said. “It’ll just put them in danger. I can’t even say bye to Jia-Li. She’ll think I just ran away for no reason, and she was too loyal of a friend to deserve that, but I cannot implicate her in my defection from the academy. She’ll be the first they question, and I don’t know that she’ll lie convincingly enough to escape suspicion. So, then, when she says she has no idea where I’ve gone, she has to be telling the truth.”

Bian cooed at you; well, maybe calling the throaty sound cooing was being generous, but there was no other way to describe it, and the sentiment was the same. She was trying, in her own way, to comfort you, and you extended your arms to her perch so that you could rub the soft, tiny feathers of her cheeks.

“Thank you for being my hawk,” you said. “Be good for whoever owns you next — unless it is the prince, in which case I give you full permission to bite his fingers whenever he tries to give you letters.”

With that, you turned around, your hands dropping to your sides as you walked, then ran out of the aviary. If you turned around, you would cry. If you turned around, you might not ever be able to leave, so you sprinted until you reached the stables where the various animals belonging to the academy were kept.

Passing by the sleeping dragon moose and the corral of komodo rhinos, you ducked into the stall of one of the mongoose lizards. Throwing its saddle on, you patted it on the forehead.

“I’m sorry,” you said, swinging on and kicking it forwards. “I promise you can go home once you get me out of the capital.”

The mongoose lizard was fast, but more than that, it was stealthy and could traverse many kinds of terrain. Scuttling through the campus, it climbed the walls at your direction, though it was obviously unsure, as it had been trained not to leave the academy, even when given the opportunity.

Looking up, you saw a shadow cover the moon briefly, and you furrowed your brow as the dark shape came hurtling down towards you. The mongoose lizard continued to dash through the streets of the capital, and you used your hands to shield your face from the incoming projectile.

You needn’t have. At the last moment, it flared its wings, landing gently on your shoulder, careful not to dig its talons into your flesh despite the subsequent loss of balance.

“Bian?” you said. She nipped your shirt collar like she was chiding you for daring to leave without her. You laughed in relief, scratching her crest. “Oh, my dear Bian. I should never have tried to go without you. Thank you for finding me.”

She hopped off your shoulder, sitting on the pommel of the saddle, surveying the terrain with the regal bearing of a figurehead. With her at your side, you weren’t quite as lonely, and though it was selfish of you, you were glad that she had made such a choice, that she loved you enough to follow you away from the comfort of the aviary.

You traveled for a while at top speed, but once the mongoose lizard began to show signs of fatigue, you reined it to a stop. Whistling for Bian, you slid off of the beast. It made a clicking noise at you, and you smiled at it.

“Thank you,” you said. “You have done your job well. You may go back now.”

Without hesitation, the mongoose lizard spun and headed in the same direction it had come from. You didn’t wait, either; the palace certainly had methods to track you, so it would be a folly for you to stay in the same place for too long.

When the search began depended on Jia-Li. If she reported your disappearance immediately, then you were in trouble, but you sensed she would not. You had a habit of coming back to the room later than her, so she’d likely not realize you were gone at all until she woke up and saw your bed had remained undisturbed the entire night.

That left you with a window of time in which you could eat and sleep. After that, you had to walk to the nearest village and appropriate a new mount that could get you even farther from the academy and the capital and Prince Zuko’s grasp.

“It’s just so strange,” you said to Bian as you made a small fire using kindling, the way you had been taught in the academy. “If I’m an Earthbender instead of a former Fire Nation soldier, then there really is no explanation for any of it. Why did he abduct me? Why did he order my memories to be subdued? What significance did I hold?”

If she knew anything about the heart or mind of her former master, she did not reveal it. Rummaging around in your bag for the bit of food you had scrounged up while packing, you chewed on it pensively before pulling out the book you had been reading.

Opening to the page you had left off on, you promised to only finish the chapter on the royal family before you went to sleep. Maybe it was foolish to sacrifice any of the precious little rest you could get, but you longed for something to soothe your mind, and you thought that reading, as a familiar habit, might accomplish that goal.

The last ruler of the Earth Kingdom was the 52nd Earth King, born Kuei. He is famous only for his ineptitude. Ascending the throne at the age of four, he was a puppet monarch for much of his life, until the day he was deposed of by Prince Zuko and the Fire Nation forces. 

For some strange reason, there was a lump in your throat reading about the 52nd Earth King, as if he was someone that you greatly missed. But that was not even the oddest thing — it was the next passage that made you truly gasp. Memories upon memories poured in as you read and reread the paragraph, which was more of a footnote than anything.

The 52nd Earth King also had a younger sister, though no one ever saw her. A nonbender like the king, Princess Y/N remained shut away in the palace her entire life, reputedly for her own protection. Because of her fragile and essentially invisible status, her own subjects mockingly referred to her as the Glass Princess.

She, along with her brother, was killed during the fall of Ba Sing Se.

[loquaciousquark]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Spread the self-love ❤️

This week has been hell and now that I'm finally coming to the end of it, I'm going to sit down & enjoy this! Sorry in advance for the length.

My favorite fics vacillate wildly depending on my mood, interest, and the time of year, but right now, I think this is what I've got. In no particular order:

Invicta, Invictus (2016)

Magister AU. Hawke ends up owning Fenris while in Minrathous & they fall in love anyway. This fic was difficult to write for a lot of reasons (a main one just being my fear of not doing justice to the premise and underselling the slavery aspect), and it took nearly a year to finish between the writing itself, the rewriting and additional scenes required from @jadesabre301's beta, and final edits. By the time I started posting I felt confident that I'd written something solid, but despite the otherwise positive response, I did end up receiving a series of extremely angry, lengthy critical comments from someone who basically accused me of perpetuating the glorification of rape, the enslavement of people of color, and the entrenchment of cruelty against victims of sexual assault. (I vividly remember a comparison between Thomas Jefferson & Sally Hemings.)

This came out of the blue from someone I knew & had otherwise quite respected; it was a blow that shook my confidence to the core, despite several wonderful people reaching out to me at the time, and while I finished posting the fic, I completely stopped writing otherwise. I ended up not writing anything of significance for three full years afterwards. It wasn't until I got extremely drunk on a work trip (after a personal dinner, no colleagues around) and went back to my hotel to jot down the first lines of the Hawke-is-rescued-from-the-Fade fic that I even entertained the idea of picking the hobby back up.

Now, looking back after almost ten years, I've long come to terms with her criticism. I've decided that I disagree with her, that I'm actually still okay with what I wrote, and that I'm proud of the work I did in that fic. I think the premise is good and the examination of the social and political structures is sound, and I think the fic does what it needs to where the relationship strains against the societal boundaries around it. Not to mention I think it has some of my best Fenris characterization I ever managed, and some of my better Hawke jokes. I think the letter exchange at the end is effectively poignant even after all this time (though I do wish I'd written Danarius's actual death a little differently), and I still find the ending as they approach Kirkwall very satisfying. I'll also never turn down a chance to let Varania have a moment or two.

I'm proud of this one, and I'm glad I wrote it.

A Midwinter's Carol; in Prose; Being a Ghost Story of Baldur's Gate (2023)

I think this fic has some of my best technical mimicry I've ever managed. I've always enjoyed a good stylistic parroting, but this was the first time I'd attempted Dickens, and I genuinely think I did a good job. 😂 I've always been fascinated by the mechanics of language, and I had a great time spoofing his oddly frank addresses to the reader and his serpentine asides.

It's quite short—less than 10k—but I think it does exactly what it's supposed to, and I'm genuinely proud of some of the AU elements. @eponymous-rose gave me Christmases Past and Present, so I can't lay claim to those (aside from execution), but the way Future's demand resolves & the Thayan book standing in for the door knocker were all mine, and I still think they're genius, ahaha. (I also fully acknowledge that I owe Jade big time for helping me clarify the final deal Astarion strikes.)

I think the wordplay throughout of what it means to be redeemed is well written, and I'm genuinely pleased with the turn of the mood during the Future sequence. I can tell my love of flippant characters having stark face-to-face encounters with gods is probably a little strong at the end, but Megan Whalen Turner was a formative influence, and I still love it the way it came out here. This is a fic that did exactly what I wanted it to from start to finish, and I love rereading it.

I also think Astarion refusing to participate in the narrative and Tav's modern voice against the Dickensian backdrop are utterly hilarious.

Iron Bound (2023)

This is the most ambitious project I've ever tackled, even considering Invicta above. I knew this would be a long fic, and while I'd daydreamed about scenes from it for nearly a decade, I genuinely didn't know if I had the technical ability to execute it the way I wanted. Once I finally, finally, finally sat down to write it, the words came out like butter, and I wrote almost 70k words in two weeks.

This fic was interesting because it included a love triangle, which is not something I have ever had the slightest interest in reading or writing, but I felt the relationships were strong enough between all three pillars that I wanted to give it a shot. I love Hawke & Fenris, obviously, but the Fenris + Sebastian brotherhood is likewise vitally important to me, and I've always treasured the Sebastian + Hawke friendship as well. Getting to examine all three of them closely here was wonderful from start to finish, and I loved looking at where the lines strained and grew lax as they got to know each other.

Likewise, I've also adored characters who have to face the conflict between love and duty, and this premise let me marinate in every part of the idea. Knowing that I'd be able to give them all happy endings—knowing that they'd be rewarded for doing the right thing—was very pat and yet very satisfying, and I enjoyed every minute of the tension before the resolution.

This fic was in many ways an homage to Patricia McKillip, one of my favorite authors, and also a frank wish-fulfillment exercise for me. This is the one where everyone lives. This is the one where no one suffers for too long. Malcolm, Carver, Bethany, Leandra—even Varania and Sebastian and Anders and the dog. Everyone lives. Everyone is happy and loved and fed and secure and will remain so for the rest of their lives, and I remain thoroughly unapologetic for it.

I do think (despite Jade's attempts to correct it) that there's some marked narrative clumsiness in the back third, and with a little distance I can see ways I could have revised the Danarius confrontation and the series of epilogues to hang together more cleanly. There are also some heavy-handed sequences regarding the broader world politics which I think stand out against what is otherwise fairly mature writing, and I wish I'd threaded those through a bit more deftly.

That said, I'm still immensely proud of this project, and once I finish this post I'm probably going to reread it start to finish. 😂

This Lethal Light Falls Softly (2023)

I was very passionate about the central conceit of this fic, and I think it shows. It's cleanly written with no wasted time—even rereading it now for this post, there's only one exchange I'd still tweak—and I'm very happy with the way I wrote the Tav & Astarion relationship at this stage. They're a wholly different beast to Fenris & Hawke, who are friends for seven years before they finally embark on a real relationship; Tav & Astarion know each other maybe a few weeks before they sleep together for the first time, and even with the most generous possible interpretation I don't think the game can take more than a handful of months. This meant I was writing lovers with new-to-me insecurities, and with Astarion's own basketful of bugaboos on top of that, everything felt fresh and exciting and a little terrifying. I think you can feel that energy in the prose, and I really like it.

Aside from that, I'm very happy with the solution I came up with to Astarion's vampirism. It was hardly inventive, but I did feel it was both practical and lore-friendly, and I felt like its cost (Tav's absence for Astarion, the exhaustion and battle and injuries for Tav) balanced out the number of boons it provided. It also made negating the vampiric effects an active, ongoing choice for Astarion, which I deeply prefer over more permanent solutions like True Resurrection or a god restoring him to mortality.

I also just honestly think it's just fun to read. I like Astarion being snippy and short-tempered while still being overjoyed to see Tav alive. I like Tav confronting the idea that Astarion loves her as much as she loves him and that her silent absence was an active harm to him. I think I did a pretty good job setting the scenery and conveying the appropriate atmosphere where it was important, and I think there are some turns of phrase throughout that came out quite lovely.

I also think ending on the button of him seeing himself in the mirror is hilarious. (Not pictured: Tav having to ask him to put down the hand mirror for literal weeks.)

ah! this grief like cold bells ringing (2020)

This is probably the most difficult fic I've written in terms of headspace. COVID's forced isolation was particularly awful for me, and I didn't know how to handle it except to try to write it out of me. This, like Iron Bound, contained something I never thought I'd write (rape/rape aftermath), but the gravity of the situation and the world at the time seemed to demand something likewise grave, and I ended up feeling like it was an appropriate choice. Hawke has been a tool of many kinds for me over the years, and I remain both glad and weirdly grateful for her resilience.

This was also the first fic where I felt like I didn't shy away from or veil Tevinter's atrocities (a necessary artifact of the premise). While it was hard to write, it wasn't hard to write, and looking back I'm glad I made the choices I did; I think to hamstring the severity of the moment would have broken the story's teeth and dampened the recovery which came after. The instinct to quit flinching away was the right one, and I think the fic is better for it.

I also think this is some of the most effective writing of catharsis I've ever managed. When I'm having a really difficult time and need to read a moment of recovery, the second chapter of this fic is always my first stop. I've actually only reread the first chapter a few times since I posted (usually the pain's not the part I need), but I've reread the second chapter a hundred times or more.

I also do think that the style of the prose—a little flatter and more direct than I usually write—came out well, especially given the subject matter. While I'd prefer never to go back to that emotional place, I'm glad this came out of it.

Honorable Mention:

Lacrimosa (2011). Still one of the oneshots I'm proudest of. I think it's technically proficient and emotionally very effective, and I love the structure of it.

A Detailed Accounting of the Rigorous and Remarkable Struggles Faced by One Fereldan Refugee in the Singularly Capricious City of Kirkwall, as Experienced by the Illustrious Author (2022). While the writing is not the best I've ever managed (it began life as a warm-up exercise, after all), it took ten years to finish, and I'm deeply proud of both finishing it and of the execution of several sections.

Find Me a Wayward Sun (2023). I like the emotional complexity of this fic very much. This was the first place where I felt like I really started to understand the dynamic between Tav & Astarion, especially in the complicated back half of Act Two, and I've gone back to it several times when I need to recapture that feeling of confused selfishness and nascent, uncertain affection.

[storm-angel989]

you don't have to do this if it makes you uncomfortable but could you do a Valentinos Daughter but the 3 vees found out she had sex with their enemy(Alastor Carmilla or Angel Dust)

Hi friend,

Ahaha. This is actually sort of perfect because it runs into the overarching issue that will eventually come to light in the OTO series. Enjoy!

<3 Mandy

Alone in his office, Valentino couldn’t believe what he was watching. A quick fumble of the remote and the screen went dark before he could see any more of his daughter than he ever wanted to. Disgust filled every inch of his body as he stood up and began to pace, his mind racing.  He knew his daughter was sexually active. Hell, Velvette had given her condoms and the talk not too long ago. It wasn’t something he could ignore, but it wasn’t something he wanted to think about either. After all, that was his little girl. 

But really, Angel Dust? In his studio? On his stage? In the very position he himself had…

He gritted his teeth and shook the thought violently from his head. No. It wouldn’t do to go that far. He picked up the phone and dialed his wife, his reader. To his relief, she picked up on the first ring.  A simple I need you, and two more phone calls later, Vox, Velvette and Reader stood in his office, watching the same footage he had laid eyes on minutes earlier. As he had before, he clicked the screen off before he saw too much of his daughter. 

“Well? What are we going to do about this?” Valentino demanded to the three unperturbed faces. 

“I mean, Val, she’s technically of age and can legally do what she wants, I don’t see the issue here other than her having sex with Angel on your stage….” Reader began. 

“You don’t see an issue…you don’t see an issue?!” Valentino snarled. “Angel changed her diapers, babysat her growing up and…”

“And is a sex demon that carted her out of the bars at eighteen and protected her when we couldn’t,” his wife continued. 

Valentino looked to Velvette and Vox. To his relief, their expressions indicated they saw and issue with this. But then again, they knew the contract he held with Angel. They knew that he has been in quite literally the same position with Angel his daughter had been caught in. 

Just the thought turned his stomach. His mind raced as he considered his options to handle the situation. He could finally come clean- tell his wife the terms of the contract, admit to having been in love with Angel Dust early in his career as an overlord. Or worse- admit to the terms he agreed to as one of the first souls bought and bound to him. But he worried what that would do to their relationship. And the last thing he wanted to do was hurt the love of his life. 

“Honestly, Val? I would just talk to her about boundaries,” Reader said after a moment of silence. “It’s your studio, I think it's best coming from you. But don’t punish her for having sex. It’s in her blood, after all.” She walked over behind the desk and grasped Valentino’s arm as he kissed his cheek. “I have to get back to work, let me know how the conversation goes honey bun.” 

Valentino sighed and watched as she sauntered out the door. Once it was safely closed, he looked to Vox and Velvette.

“You both…see the issue here, right?” He asked. 

To his relief, they nodded. He leaned forward and gripped his desk. 

“Talking to my wife isn’t an option. And talking to my daughter is just a risk of her opening up. Which means we need to…”

“Have a discussion with Angel Dust. Yeah, that’s about all we can do,” Velvette said sarcastically. “Unless of course, you decide to open up to your wife and…”

“Not an option, Vel. She can’t know just how bad this side of me, she can’t see me…” Valentino began.

“Yeah, yeah,” Vox interrupted, “we know your stance. No need to repeat it. Look.  Vel and I will handle Angel Dust- point out a few lines in his contract that will keep him away from your daughter forever. You pick up the pieces when she seems down. See if she’ll talk to you about what happened. Be the father you are to her, and give her the love and support she needs.” Vox turned towards the door but paused, “but Val? You can’t hold this secret forever. Someday, it’s going to come out.” 

Valentino watched as he and Velvette walked out of the room. He sank down in his chair and buried his head in his hands. Somewhere deep inside, he knew they were right.

[cirilla-fiona-riannon]

Make Me Feel Alive Episode 2

Gilbert von Obsidian's Birthday Story

This is simply a fan translation and is not intended as a replacement for the game. Expect grammatical errors.

Several decades ago, a series of unfortunate events occurred in Obsidian, involving the deaths of members of the royal family and powerful nobles.

It all began with the assassination of the crown prince, followed by incidents such as accidental falls, carriage accidents, bloodshed due to tangled love affairs, and executions.

The unfortunate events continued as if someone were orchestrating them behind the scenes, and those who had been enjoying the power desperately tried to gain favor with the surviving influential figures.

The one who caught the attention of several people was a young prince who was still a child back then.

Despite the repeated deaths within the royal family, the one-eyed boy walked through the castle with a smile.

With just a few words, he demonstrated wisdom beyond his years, and it didn't take long for people to see in him the qualities fit for a king.

The one-eyed boy would eventually become the emperor.

The rumors spread like wildfire, and people did their best to gain his favor.

Gilbert: "It was fun back then. People who never paid me any attention suddenly bowed their heads, and the grown-ups kneeled before me."

Gilbert: "I wish I could've shown you how embarrassing that scene was."

(His childhood stories are always lonely.)

Gilbert: "Ahaha! Stop making that face. We haven't even gotten to the main part yet."

Emma: "Is this even related to your birthday?"

Gilbert: "Yeah. Think about it. If you were trying to win me over, what would you do first?"

Emma: "I'd bake lots of sweets."

Walter: "Please, stop with the carbs."

Emma: "S-Sorry."

Gilbert: "Shut up if you don't want to die, Walter."

Walter: "It's my job to watch over your health."

Gilbert: "Noisy outsiders aside, your idea is correct. You're going to give me something that I would enjoy, right?"

Gilbert: "But a gift, by its nature, cannot be given without a reason. That's why many people focus on一"

Emma: "Your birthday?"

Gilbert: "Yup. At that time, people saw me as a child. And what do children love? Presents."

Gilbert: "One certain year, a useless noble threw a birthday party for me."

------------Flashback-----------

Noble: "Happy birthday, Prince Gilbert."

Noble: "I sincerely offer my congratulations to you, Your Highness. This gemstone is a gift from our family."

Gilbert: "Fufu, thank you. But I don't need that kind of thing."

Noble: "Prince Gilbert?"

Gilbert: "I'm tired and sleepy, so I'm heading back. Goodnight."

Noble: "P-Please wait!"

Gilbert: "Ahaha! Don't worry. I have plans to meet with you tomorrow."

Noble: "Plans?"

Gilbert: "Yes. Well then, let's meet again at the execution ground."

Noble: "What!?"

---------Flashback Ends--------

Gilbert: "The next day, I killed him."

Emma: "What?"

Gilbert: "I just tried to make an example out of the guy."

I was so shocked that my mind went blank.

Roderich: "He was executed for human trafficking and illegal drug possession."

Roderich: "He was an underground merchant who trained unidentified orphans with drugs and illegally traded them. Prince Gilbert had been一"

Gilbert: "Hey, did I ever say you could open your mouth?"

Under his murderous gaze, Roderich fell silent.

Gilbert: "Anyway, I killed him."

Gilbert: "How did the people react? Of course, they thought that celebrating my birthday had upset me."

Gilbert: "After that year, there weren't any more daredevils."

Gilbert: "I was able to eliminate those who celebrated my birthday. All's well that ends well."

Emma: "Why did you hate being celebrated that much?"

(His birthday is taboo for the Obsidian people.)

(But celebrating itself shouldn't be a bad thing.)

Gilbert: "I wonder why?"

Seemingly reluctant to delve into the matter, Gilbert hid his words behind a smile.

Even when I looked at Roderich and Walter, they just shook their heads.

(Maybe no one really knows the reason.)

Gilbert: "Now then, little rabbit. As you said, my birthday is approaching soon."

He suddenly stood in front of me, gently placing his hands on my neck and squeezing it lightly.

Gilbert: "Will you also celebrate my birthday at the risk of your life?"

Episode 1 ╎ Episode 2 ╎ Episode 3

[starlightiing]

I saw you were sad about your writing before you deleted that post. Wanna tell us about some WIPs you have? 🥺 ❤️ 💙 💜

Thanks anon I appreciate you. I kinda want to throw all my WIPs in the trash actually ahaha but uh lemme gather my documents and see what I have...

Pierresteban:

1. Car Crash fic. Pierre gets in a horrific car accident while they're in Texas a week before the GP. He and Esteban had a nasty break up and quite literally only speak for work purposes. Pierre, however, forgot to update his emergency contact and Esteban got the call at 2am. Tired and annoyed, he brings himself to the hospital with his proof of identity, expecting to hear that Pierre was stupid and broke an arm or something. It's much worse.

2. Android AU - Pierre is a very high tech android, the first and only of his kind. He's incredibly hyper realistic, so much so that he managed to fool a doctor. However, when he's debuted to the investors, they're afraid of how realistic he is. They tell the devs to turn him off and put him away for now, but Pierre was built with self preservation and he knows that means death. He runs away from them and seeks refuge with one of the mechanics that works for the company that created him - Esteban Ocon. Chaos ensues. Esteban steals this multi million dollar android and runs away with him to save his life.

3. Jurassic World AU - Pierre works at the hatchery with baby dinos. He's a "veterinarian" in a sense, and he plays with/mothers the baby dinos and makes sure they are socialized and enriched and such before they're put in their enclosures. Esteban works park security and special operations. When the park goes down, a series of events leads them both to miss the evacuation boat and thanks to Esteban losing his heart monitor in the scuffle, his security team sees him "flatline" and they think he's dead, so no one is coming for them, either. Survival AU for the boys.

Landoscar:

1. Young Forever AU - this one is a bit odd, but it's a sort of "if you fall asleep you die" scenario, only its "if the music stops you die" - based on the line "the best of the drums keeps us alive" from the song Young Forever by The Ready Set - tying it into the beat of the drum being the beat of their hearts. If they're without music, they're without a beat, and therefore their heart stops. It sounds dumb. I promise it won't be. I'm still working out the kinks. It's going to be the strangest thing I ever write I think.

2. Soulmate AU - Don't want to go too far into this one, but Lando is a star that is humanized when he makes it to Earth. Yes, it sounds similar to the movie Stardust, no, it's actually not. Oscar has Lando's stardust inside of him, and so he literally lights up from his veins up to his heart when Lando touches him, because it's the stardust inside of him reacting to its host. Oscar has to help Lando figure out how to be human, they fall in love, there's issues, ect ect. Their bond is moldable. It's cute.

3. Flatliners AU - this one has a lot of pairings but the main focus is landoscar. Lando, Oscar, Pierre, Esteban, Alex, George, Charles, and Logan are med students in their residencies at the same hospital. Lando is focusing in neurology and has taken a special interest in "life after death" and what the brain does when the heart stops. He approaches his friends with a very casual, "I want you to stop my heart" to mixed reviews. Oscar's focus is cardiology and also he has the most sense out of them all so he highly protests such a stupid idea. Majority rules, though, unfortunately for him.

Lestappen / Galex / Landoscar / Pierresteban:

1. Angel AU - first part has been posted. Post apocalyptic world. Some humans started being born with genetic mutations: wings. Wings are worth a lot of money on the black market because the feathers have dust on them that are used for making hallucinogenic drugs. Humans are viciously hunting angels down to make a buck. A lot of underground bunkers from the apocalypse are commandeered by GOOD humans who set them up as sanctuaries to hide angels in. Alex Albon runs a sanctuary (he's also a doctor). Charles is his right hand man, and alongside Lewis, they lead raids and missions to find angels, save them, and take out hunters. Lots of subplots in this one, but it's a lot of fun. And a lot of pain.

Alex/Logan:

1. Soulmate AU that I have not decided on yet.

Yukierre:

1. Soulmate au with soulmarks. Featuring Pierre being rejected by his soulmate which causes the biggest downward depressive spiral when his soul make disappears and another doesn't manifest in its place. Lots of angst here. Yuki saves the day.

Charles/George:

1.Inception AU - this can also fall under Pierresteban and Landoscar. It is literally just the dumb boys in the universe of Inception, invading dreams and doing very illegal things while dressed up in very fancy expensive clothes. Also they have guns.

[the-daiz]

Flashy flash, falling inlove?

Genre; fluff, hcs

Pairing; Flashy flash x reader

side note; My brain does not shut up save me please save me from my suffering. Also I should make this a series, no?

long

not proofread cuz its 2:40 am

I can only think of 2 types of people he’d fall for: someone who is strong, close to his strength or even stronger, or a normal civilian who completely gives 0 shits about him.

Because the other scenario is funnier, I’m gonna do that one. But if you want the first scenario too, just lmk 😋

Your first encounter with this guy was when you were heading home late, after an exhausting, long shift. You had a taser on you, if you live in a world full of Monsters and chaos you’ll have to learn to protect yourself, no?

also, you just so happened to always attract monsters where ever you go.

Unfortunately for you, however, the monster that you encountered that day was immune to the electrical voltage of your stun gun.

When you had jammed your taser into its body, and it gave no reaction, you attempted to run but the feind yanked you by your arm, and started taunting you.

but before anything else could happen, a small gust of wind wizzed past you, and the monster was left in clean-cut pieces on the ground. It took you a moment to process what just happened before flashy flash suddenly appeared, standing over the orge’s dismantled being.

first thing you did when your mind gears started shifting again was glance down at your body, and make sure all your limbs and belongings were intact. All while flashy flash stood, rather awkwardly, before you. Probably waiting for some kind of reaction.

When you finally felt his intense gaze, you offered him a flat ‘thank you’.

then started walking away.

he was taken aback by your reaction.

He stopped you from leaving, and started almost lecturing you about walking alone at such a late hour. You just stared at him, trying to hide your annoyance. You just wanted to get home.

When you still gave him a monotoned response he said. “I’m flashy flash...”

You stared at him with unamusement.

”…the S-class hero.”

”oh, that’s nice…?” -You

”you do know who I am, no??” -flash

”ahaha,, oh yeah! Definitely!” You, obviously lying.

His ego was wounded.

How could you have not heard of him before? Him! The fastest hero alive!

there was definitely something wrong with you, no normal person would react the way you did. So he decided he needed to get to the bottom of this.

He starts following you around. And takes note of everything you do.

there isn’t much to you, though.

He concludes that: You’re just average, and overworked. And you look quite nice too, your outfit choices are perfect. They really compliment you. Also the way you handle yourself is rather refreshing, not to mention your resilience and…

But also, you attract trouble a lot. And since he’s always following you, he ends up taking care of a few himself, but he does like to watch you take down the monsters yourself too, he enjoys seeing how you catch them off guard with your taser, and how you rarely ever look the slightest bit shaken before them, no matter how grotesque they look.

After 5 times of him saving you from yet another problem, you start to grow suspicious and confront him… he plays it off well, and starts to pursue a small conversation with you….

then finds out you don’t even remember his name.

”what are you talking about, I definitely know your name… uh, flashy dash, right?” -you.

Yeah, he needed to stop being around you for the sake of his own mental health.

To help himself cope with your nonchalant attitude and the fact you didn’t even bother looking him up once after the countless times he saved you. He just stops stalking you.

I mean, why would he? He already crossed out any suspicions he had of you.

When he stopped, though, he started missing you??

he didn’t even understand what he was feeling. I mean, yeah, sure, your face was nice, and I guess you were a little cool. You’re strong in a way he didn’t even know someone could be. And I guess you’re a pleasant person. And he likes your hobbies, and what you do, and watching you do it. Maybe. But so what??

He starts growing irritable. You’re always consuming his mind.

It must be because he was around you for so long, his brain is simply not used to the switch of routine. Yes! That’s definitely it!

A month passes. With him going out of his way to avoid even the mere sight of you.

AND HIS EMOTIONS ARE GETTING WORSE!

worse as in stronger, more roudy, and more overbearing.

He starts to resent you in a way, and he feels frustrated with himself.

How could he be so allured by someone so incredibly normal, someone who doesn’t even remember his name, while he knows every single detail about them!?

When the feelings get too intense, to the point they’re interfering with his hero work. He decides to go and confront you.

Maybe if he speaks with you, he could find something to hate about you. Something he doesn’t like about your personality, or about your face, just anything that could trick his mind into being revolted by you.

”oh, hey flashy flash.” -You

His heart leaps. His breathing stops for a moment and his mind goes blank.

you remembered his name, you greeted him first!

He sucked in a deep breath and masked the ghostly joy on his features.

He was going to insult you, or make a backhanded comment, just anything to tick you off and make you feel the slightest bit frustrated, like he’s been frustrated for the past month.

But when his lips parted to spew out the harsh sentences he had been practicing in his head on the way here… nothing would come out.

He couldn’t do it. Not with the way your gorgeous hues were peering at him with genuine curiosity.

He just asked about your day instead. His voice was low and a bit awkward, but his face was firm with his usual stern expression.

He tried to ignore the racing beat of his heart when you smiled at him, or when you asked about his day, or cracked a light-hearted joke every now and then

He tried to calm his breathing through his nose, but he didn’t think he could keep his composure for long.

He quickly wraps up the discussion, and felt his heart ache slightly when you didn’t seem the slightest bit bothered by his urgency to leave.

Either way. He couldn’t stop thinking about that interaction. His mind kept wondering back to the way you looked at him, to the gravitating way your lips moved, to your words, to your voice-

He definitely couldn’t avoid you after this. Maybe he’ll just enjoy having these feelings for you, for a little bit…

He starts going up to you more often. A lot of the times when your heading back from work, and there aren’t much people on the streets.

You question his intentions, and he simply states that you attract too many monsters, and it’s his job to take care of them. You didn’t really buy it but didn’t bother probing much.

He was wrong about something. You weren’t normal. You didn’t care about what other people thought. You carried yourself so definitely from everyone else. You knew what to prioritize.

You didn’t treat him like a hero. You treated him more like a good friend. He didn’t know how good that felt until you had entered his life. (actually he’s the one that entered your life but anyhow)

and you were simply enchanting.

Still, he didn’t like that you barely knew anything about his very flashy, and amazing, career and talent.

How he confesses… One day, on your usual walk with flashy flash after work, you ask him about his hero work. He gets slightly excited at that and straightens his back a little.

He tries to keep everything he says low-key, like “Yeah, I do this and that. I mostly work alone. i neutralize the enemy quickly. I’m very busy mhm.”

You just nod attentively and continue to ask more questions, and to say that he was elated would be an understatement.

It was when you ask. “What rank are you in again? B, right? Or A?” (you forgot S class even existed) that everything goes south.

He stops walking and tries to hide the disheveled look on his face.

He hated the constriction in his chest.

He was an S-class hero, one of the strongest, the fastest. Defeated the most viscous monsters to walk this earth

And, yet he was still another hero name, still another rank you could barely remember.

How weak does he seem to you?

”S-class.” He muttered, his voice cooler than it had been before.

”oh? What does that stand for, special-class?” You let out an awkward chuckle, trying to lighten the mood.

“I have to go.”

You’re about to protest and ask him what’s wrong, but he’s already gone in a blink.

He couldn’t stand it anymore. You, a weak civilian, looking down on him?? You didn’t deserve him. (or at least that’s what he was telling himself)

Even though he couldn’t deny the yearning in his heart, he started avoiding you like the plague. Going out of his way to patrol areas that he knew you had no way of being in.

a few days after the incident, when flashy flash is no where to be found, you knew you had done something to hurt him, and that he was avoiding you.

So you start looking for him,

it takes you weeks to finally catch him.

you’re at a minor incident site and wait patiently behind a wall, hiding away from the monsters, for flashy flash to hopefully appear.

And appear he does.

your face lights up at the sight of him, and after he takes care of the few weak monsters, you rush iut of your hiding spot and yell out for him, grasping his arm so he couldn’t leave.

He doesn’t look at you and stays quiet, trying to contain the turmoil in his mind.

You start apologizing for everything wrong you think you could’ve done. And admit that you missed him.

He’s a bit taken aback by this, his eyes visibly widening at the confession.

He explains how he was hurt by the fact that you didn’t acknowledge his strength or rank. He didn’t mean for his thought to spill like that.

You two have a bit of an awkward back and forth, and when silence settles between you two, that’s when he confesses.

His words are elegant and romantic, even if his voice is a bit strained, and his features are slightly distressed, it still doesn’t fail to leave you awe-stricken. (Shhwhahhawgwahahah)

He’s not surprised when you reciprocate his feelings. (cuz his ego is still high asf)

How he is in a relationship,,,

He’s a very busy man, so he doesn’t spend much time with you, but when he does, he makes sure to shower you with compliments and love. He’s very skilled when it comes to verbal affection and doesn’t shy away from showing off his talent.

Speaking of showing off, he always tries to show off to you. If youre watching him fight, he’ll use unnecessary, extra-flashy moves, and glances at you every once in awhile to make sure you’re watching.

When you’re on a date, he makes sure there are zero distractions for him, and rarely ever has to excuse himself because of his hero duties. He wants everything he does for you to be perfect.

his love language is gift giving and quality time.

he SHOWERS you with expensive gifts, and anything you want. If your eye lingers on something, he’s already at the checkout with every colour option of that thing.

He has the money, so of course he’ll spoil you rotten.

Your outings too are also very lavish.

Even though he does spend a lot of time fighting monsters and saving the city, he values the time he spends with you more than anything. He doesn’t care what you are doing as long as you’re beside him.

Honestly, I don’t see him being big on physical touch, he loves it from you though. Adores it when you lovingly caress his face, embrace him or nuzzle closer to him.

PDA is a no-no, BUT, if he gets jealous of someone who is getting a little too close to you. His hands are magnets and you’re the metal. He’s pulling you close by your hips, pressing you close to his chest as he makes passive-aggressive remarks or simply glares at the individual he’s jealous of. (How cliche)

When he’s having a bad day, he’ll collapse into your arms and asks you to massage his scalp while he complains about it, his arms wrapped around your waist.

His kisses are very passionate and lingering. He’ll often have his hands softly holding the side of your face while the other cradles the back of your head. He loves planting kisses all over you.

[turbulentscrawl]

I hope you dont mind me sending a req and it should be angsty right?

I absolutely adore your modern reader and i very much like andrew. So do you mind me sending a request about the modern reader with andrew part 2? To connect with the angsty part, personally i want you to write something about how the modern reader feels lonely for being the only one who comes from the modern timeline, like feeling alienated or estrangement from everyone who comes from the past and struggling with the no internet or new media to consume (personally i think anyone who is from our time could probably feel a withdrawal of internet. I know i do. It suck and i look crazy when it happened.)

Ooo.. considering how our mannerism, fashion, and hygiene routine differ a lot from the past can also cause friction with others can be a good angsty idea. And also food, assuming the reader come from a well off family, their food would looked like what royalty ate. With salt, pepper, cinnamon cost a fortune back in time. You can go wild, i am sorry if this is a long req, i merely gives suggestion. Dont mind me if you dont want to write it.

I think this is the longest individual scene I've written so far! I got carried away ahaha. Actually, this might need to become a multi-part series. ewe

Warnings: fem reader (it was relevant for this), hurt and comfort

Another day of staring at the wall. Or the garden, as this particular moment would have it.

It had been about three months since your arrival now, according to Freddy. (Tracking the days was the one thing he was good for outside of matches, as far as you were concerned. The guy was meticulous with records-keeping, you’d give him that. But he was also a dick.) Three months of boredom, monotony, and a critical lack of stimuli.

The first few weeks had been fine, if only because you were too busy trying to survive a potential witch hunt. Turns out, being hated and blamed for everything has a way of distracting the mind from its homesickness. But the worst of that had passed now, leaving you to take in the reality of your situation: you were more removed from your old life than anyone else here. Your entire way of life was gone.

There was no internet, no television. There was a library, but it was only ever added to at the whim of the man named Orpheus. There were no cars, and there was nowhere to go. There wasn’t even a washing machine—everyone took turns doing their clothes by hand. The stove in the kitchen was gas, and fickle. The doctor, Emily, and Luca made efforts to introduce you to the ways of this more ‘primitive’ environment, but the sheer disappointment of it all made it hard to make an effort. The hygiene standards were different, too, and it was jarring to see what some of these people considered ‘clean.’

“What are you doing out here?” A voice calls. You jump a bit, rattling the chains of the bench swing you’ve occupied. When you turn around, the ‘Gravekeeper’ is behind you in his dark casual wear. The moon is but a sliver in the sky, so if it weren’t for the paleness of his face and hair you might not have seen him at all in the darkness.

“What does it look like?” you ask in response and face forward again. ‘Andrew’ isn’t a bad person, from what you can tell. He doesn’t seem to hate you like some of the others do. But he’s defensive, sticks his foot in his mouth a lot, and you’re too tired for an argument.

“…It’s past curfew,” he says, voice moving around the swing slowly. He’s in your periphery now, hands folded over his chest like he’s still holding that shovel of his. It’s some kind of comfort item for him, you think, but he doesn’t have it with him.

“Luca said that’s just a suggestion,” you reply. “And even if it’s not, you’re out here too.” Andrew pauses after you say that, awkwardly shuffling in his spot, looking between you and the garden. There are no birds, no crickets out. You can hear him swallow thickly in the silence.

“I saw you from the upstairs window,” he says slowly. “I…thought I should come check.”

“Why?” You’re waiting for a ball to drop. To be tricked.

“You’ve been quiet lately,” Andrew says, wiping his hands on his pants. Sweat, maybe. “When you first showed up…I thought you were really loud. You and that little box both…. You used to play that terr— eh, that music on it all the time. But I haven’t heard it in a while.” Your eyes are drawn to him as he explains. You can’t help it, you’re stunned. Not many of the other survivors bothered to show concern for you, and they often weren’t around because they had their on things to attend to. Luca had his inventions, Ada had Emil’s treatments, Luchino his research. You didn’t know Andrew paid any mind to you. He mostly kept to himself.

“I’m stewing,” you whisper, answering his initial question.

“…Do you…need to talk about it?” he asks.

“You don’t want to hear it,” you reply quickly. Andrew scoffs, a flash of his attitude returning.

“I asked didn’t I? I may not understand half the stuff you say but that doesn’t mean by ears don’t work,” he snaps weakly. It sounds like something someone back home would say. It sounds genuine. You look at Andrew again, now with tears in your eyes and a lump in your throat.

“I feel gross,” you croak. Andrew was scowling for a second, but your words shock his face back into something more relaxed. He shifts around again, awkward, unsure, and steps towards the bench. You stop rocking it long enough to let him join you and he sits closer than you would have expected. “I hate it here.” Andrew nods, watching your face, your fidgeting hands, your bouncing knees, and everything spills out like vomit.

“It’s all gone. Everything I knew. There’s nothing to do here besides survive, necessities and shit, and everyone fucking hates me here. No one talks like I’m used to, or behaves like I’m used to, or treats me like I’m used to—but I’m the odd one out so it feels like it’s all my fault that I don’t fit in. I miss my friends, my clothes, my room, my food. I miss my movies, I miss my technology, I miss my products—you guys don’t even treat hygiene the same way we did back home for fuck’s sake--” You’d learned early on that it was considered odd to bathe daily. Water reserves weren’t a concern in the manor, but everyone mostly stuck to the routines they knew. The only saving grace was that you hadn’t had a menstrual cycle since before you arrived. One less thing to worry about, at least.

“—and thank god, because none of you even KNOW what a tampon is!” Andrew makes a face that’s something between embarrassment and horror. You can tell from the way he’s subtly looking himself over that he wonders if he seems gross to you, but you’re too deep in your own misery to bring it up right now.

“And I’m sick of how some of them men here treat me! I don’t give a fuck what it was like for you all, I’m an equal to you all, god damn it, not a punching bag, or a whore, or unpaid maid! Like—I get that you all don’t realize what you’re doing—I get you haven’t been told it’s bad yet, but I’m gonna crack Edgar’s glass jaw if he suggests I wear a skirt ‘like the other ladies’ one more time!”

“If it helps,” Andrew says quietly, “I think that’s just him liking skirts. He’d probably wear one himself if he had an excuse.”

“I don’t care,” you gasp, grabbing Andrew’s forearm suddenly. He tenses under your touch, blushes. “It’s—it’s just all of it together! Look, I-I already feel bad being so angry! I understand why I seem scary, and I understand the world was a different place for me, but I hate that I have to say goodbye to all of it just because no one wants to learn about how things were for me! Fuckin—Emily was interested in how I lived through Covid, but all that got me was being treated like a plague rat. You guys don’t even get sick here! And Norton asked about the economy, but now he thinks I’m some rich bitch when I wasn’t even middle class! And Fiona acts like I’m some beast because of how I talk and curse so much! And Kevin asks about me feeling safe, but then he treats me like a damsel who needs constant rescue! I just…I just….it’s always something! I just want someone to treat me like I’m normal again.”

You crumple into full sobs, forehead landing on Andrew’s sturdy shoulder. He’s completely silent while you break down. His free hand eventually comes up to hold the back of your neck, a gesture that tells you it’s fine for you to be there, against him. Andrew is not a man of many comforting words, but this is enough, you decide. It’s an effort, which feels like more than you’ve gotten in some time.

You don’t know how long you stay like that, but when you finally calm down Andrew suggests you get some sleep.

“I’m not tired,” you croak. You are. It’s a lie. But if you sleep it will be tomorrow instead of being this moment of rare comfort. Andrew hums an acknowledgement.

“Alright. Neither am I," he says.

You think that’s a lie, too.

[benedictscanvas]

be still, my foolish heart [4] - jamie tartt x reader

pairing: jamie tartt x fem!reader

word count: 3k

series warnings: lots of language throughout, some allusions to smut but nothing explicit, a LOT of fucking fluff mostly ngl

a/n: this gif whewww <3 this series is so FUN omg. i'm so glad people are even still reading it ahaha. enjoy the last chapter before the Euros!

series summary: when jamie gets called up to the england team for the first time, he’s terrified. enter you, all smiles and swearing, and suddenly his only fear is falling head over boots for you.

previous chapter | series masterlist | next chapter

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chapter four - imagine being loved by me

Tomorrow, Jamie’s getting on a plane to Italy, where England’s Euros campaign will begin. He’s not scared anymore, because he’s trained hard the last few weeks, he gets on with his teammates, he knows realistically how many minutes he’s going to get. It’s so different to his role at Richmond, where he knows just how important he is to the team and so does everyone around him. Here, though, his importance is less obvious, but he still feels it. Still feels part of this team.

It’s this change in attitude and newfound confidence that’s led him to playing at his best level in the past week of training. When he jogs out onto the pitch for their final session before they leave, he’s lighter than ever, tipping a splash of water from his water bottle down Gondo’s neck as he passes him with a cackle.

Yes, he’s stewing over the fact that he hasn’t spoken to you in four days, but he’s really trying not to dwell on it.

When he was on the pitch, it was one of the only times you wouldn’t pop into his mind randomly. A vision of you in Richmond red, sat on the edge of a pool, beaming down at him like some fucking angel or something. It’s plagued him enough that he hasn’t volunteered for any PR in those four days, so he hasn’t properly seen you. Doesn’t even know if you’re disappointed he’s not showing up anymore. He’s not sure if he wants you to miss him or not.

His gut twinges when he thinks about it though, and he definitely wants you to miss him a little bit.

It feels like it’s the only fear he has left. Either he gives in to this infatuation with you that he’s unwilling to admit to and probably fucks it up within the week, or he stops talking to you until he can think about your face without a smile appearing on his.

The latter feels safer. He hasn’t even thought about anything romantic with anyone since way back in his prick days, and the thought of reverting back to that with you makes him sick.

“Let’s get to it, boys! Full 60 minute match to test our endurance today, second team grab bibs and let’s go!”

One of the coaches claps enthusiastically as the second team grabs a bib, Jamie included, who is excited to get out there and stop fucking thinking. It’s not sure it’s ever been a strength of his.

Once he’s on the pitch, he’s in his element again. Rife is first team and marking him, so it’s hard work, but he gets a goal within twelve minutes that feels like a cracker. He gets the now familiar pats on the back and bites back his wide grin.

“Thanks for the assist, man,” he says to Gondo, slapping the back of his head. Gondo mutters something about payback for the water incident earlier, but he’s smiling. Jamie feels like, just maybe, this group could win the Euros. They’re that good. He could be part of that.

Still high on the adrenaline of his goal, he skips past one of the Arsenal boys in defence and has another clear run on goal. Or so he thinks. He doesn’t even see the other central defender, who comes clattering into him full force a second later and Jamie’s on the ground before he knows what’s happened.

Usually he’d be rolling about by now to get the free kick, but he’s stuck in place as he reaches down for his ankle.

Fuck. Fuck fuck shit fuck.

He might be saying that out loud, he’s not sure. There’s a physio beside him all too quickly as he lets his head fall back onto the turf, not hearing anything but noise from the teammates surrounding him. The physio must prod something, because Jamie lets out a groan that he feels in his chest and then he hears the word stretcher. That brings him out of it.

“I’m not leavin’ on a fuckin’ stretcher,” he grinds out, sitting up and reaching out for the guy who’d brought him down to pull him back up. The teammate in question, Wire, is apoloigisely profusely, shaking his head, “All good, mate. All good.”

Jamie can’t believe he’s comforting someone else right now. His ankle fucking hurts but he leans on the physio for support and hobbles off the pitch. Gareth claps him on the back and whispers in his ear on his way out, but he honestly didn’t pay attention.

His dream’s over. He’s never ever going to play for England and there’s gotta be a reason for this and maybe this is finally his punishment for how-

“Sit down,” the physio insists, pulling a chair practically under him as they reach the physio room. She pulls another chair opposite him, “Elevate it. We got this.”

He nods, grateful for the vote of confidence as she bustles out of the room again to get ice. No words could convince him though: he’s still 100% positive that his dream is over and it’s all his fault and he should have been more careful and this is the universe telling him it isn’t meant to be and and and…

“Fucking fuck, Jamie! What the fuck? Is it your ankle?”

You come barrelling through the physio door, shutting it behind you with your foot as you crouch down next to him. It’s too many shocking things in a row, so he just stares at you, blank faced. He’s really hoping those aren’t tears he feels in his eyes.

You seem to see his distress a minute too late. He hears you swear again under your breath, then you pull up yet another chair to sit beside him, leaning forward with your elbows on your knees as you look back at him.

“Sorry. Not helpful. We’ll just wait and see what she says, yeah?”

He wants to nod, but he doesn’t think he actually does. It’s like his muscles aren’t listening to his brain. The physio returns and immediately gets a wraparound ice pack on his ankle, crouching down to secure it. She tilts her head to give you a look, but you glare at her enough that she relents. Jamie isn’t sure what that interaction means.

Underneath the ice pack, the physio uses gentle, prodding fingers to initially assess the ankle. If Jamie was trying to be brave before, he was in a whole new realm of that now, desperate not to let out another yelp with you present. It only seemed to be one specific place where the pain spiked when she pressed down, but he had never been one to listen closely to physios so he had no idea what that meant.

“We’re going to keep this on for fifteen minutes to start with, alright? Then I’ll bring back the mini-ultrasound and we can assess it properly,” she said, and Jamie was listening intently, still just nodding in lieu of words. The physio in question, and he wished he knew her name at that moment, began to walk out, but stopped at the door, “I’m not supposed to get your hopes up, but it really feels like an impact injury to me rather than a sprain or a tear. Don’t tell anyone I said that.”

She fixes both Jamie and you with a glare that tells you she’s serious, and then she’s gone. Jamie is left with eyes blinking back tears and you, sat beside him, leaning back into your chair with a deep sigh. He can’t even turn to look at you properly as he speaks.

“I knew this was too good to be true.”

A pause. He can feel your eyes on the side of his face, studying his profile.

“What?”

“This. Being here. Playing for England, like. I’ve dreamt about it since I was a fuckin’ kid, ya know? Tryin’ to escape the life I had. Finally thought I’d fuckin’ done that and here we are.”

It was strange how quickly he felt his self-deprecation turn into anger. Yes, there was a voice telling him this was the punishment he’d never received from Ted for being such a shit, but now that some of the adrenaline was wearing off, a larger part of him knew that wasn’t true. That he’d put in the work to make sure he did deserve this. To have it taken away felt like some cruel joke, designed to crush his self-esteem. Like fuck he’d let it.

“Jamie…”

“Nah, y’ know what? I’ve worked hard. Really fuckin’ hard. Trainin’ with Roy to get better and sorting meself out. When I went home to me mum last, she said she was proud. Proper proud, and she didn’t mean about the football shit. I’ve done the work. This is…it isn’t-”

There are those tears again, stinging behind his eyes. He really doesn’t want to cry, because he can hear his dad shouting the word ‘weak’ in his ear until he turns red in the face, but he wants to be past that. Needs to be. So he lets a tear fall, even if he’s quick to wipe it from his cheek with a rough knuckle.

He hasn’t looked at you through his speech, too consumed by all the thoughts going into it, but when he does risk turning his face to yours, he’s shocked to see similar tears in your own eyes. You must see the look on his face, because you’re quick to duck your head and try to rid yourself of them.

“Sorry,” you mumble, blinking rapidly as you look back up at him, “I always cry when someone else does, it’s stupid. But you are right. You do fucking deserve this Jamie, and if you don’t get it, then the world’s unfair. But you’re on this team already, remember. You’re in that dream you had as a kid right now, even if it doesn’t feel like it. Think you’d be your own hero right now.”

It’s a way he hasn’t looked at things before. He thinks a lot about making his mum proud and he used to think a lot about making his dad angry but he’s never really thought about his younger self, what he’d think if he could see himself now.

“Yeah,” he breathes, “Maybe. Thanks, for sayin’ that. And, you know, for comin’ here.”

He’s still not sure why you came. Later, when he’s doing that terrible thinking thing again in the comfort of his own bed, he’ll replay the image of you rushing into the room, out of breath, coming to check he’s okay. It’s stuck with him.

“Oh, I shouldn’t even be here really. I was just- I was pitchside and saw you go down. Panicked a bit for you. Sorry I barged in, actually, I can go if-”

“No no, stay,” he says, too quickly, “If y’ want to, like.”

“I would,” you confirm and somehow despite his situation he feels his heart beating a little faster at the smile that takes over your face as you continue, “Gotta be here when she gives you the all clear. Here we are, crying and shit, but she’s totally about to walk in here and tell you there’s nothing to worry about.”

She did say it might be an impact injury. He doesn’t want to get his hopes up, but he still asks you as stupid question.

“You think so?”

As if you’d know. Still, he’s rewarded for his dumb need for reassurance when you reach over to take his hand in yours, just for a moment. A singular squeeze. When you let go, his hand stays in place.

“Yep. Only thing that makes sense. If you’re not cleared to play in our first match in two days, I’ll have to seriously rethink my whole optimistic worldview. It would be very damaging.”

You’re kidding around. Distracting him. You’ve done it before, even if you didn’t know it at the time, but this time you’re doing it on purpose and he’s so grateful. It’s one of the first times he’s been struck by how much he wants to hug you, hold you close to him, rather than how desperate he is to kiss the air from your lungs (even if he still really wants to do that too).

“Ah yeah. Well, we can’t have me ankle damagin’ your whole cheerful thing you’ve got goin’. Would be very selfish of me.”

“Very. And from what I’ve heard, you’re not the selfish type anymore. Unless I’ve heard wrong, Tartt?”

He places a hand on his chest, wounded.

“Already back to me last name? You’re a cruel woman,” he says, eyes glinting mischief, “I’ll make sure me ankle’s alright to play then, I suppose. If it’s for you.”

Now that was dangerously close to flirting. It had just come out.

“Very kind of you,” you retort, but it’s closer to fondness than the same flirty tone as his voice had accidentally taken on. Message received. He knew he shouldn’t flirt anyway and you not reciprocating was only the confirmation he needed of that fact.

The two of you sit in silence, then, but it’s not as uncomfortable as it could be. There’s a charge in the air, maybe caused by both of your adrenaline still dissipating, but he’s quite happy to sit in silence with you, especially when you’ve just succeeded in both making him feel better and distracting him from the matter at hand.

After what doesn’t feel like very long, the physio comes bundling back into the room, pushing her ultrasound machine on a trolley. She’s clearly been setting it up in the hallway already and Jamie faintly wonders if she’d left the two of alone to talk deliberately.

“Right, it’ll be a little cold, that’s just gel. Try and relax, and keep still.”

He does just that. He rocks his head to the side and sticks his tongue out at you, just to see you giggle. There’s a pit in his stomach that this woman is about to snatch the little bubble you’d created for him away, but then he sees her smile. She stands to take off her gloves and Jamie holds his breath.

“No evidence of any damage, Jamie,” she says and he huffs out all his breath at once in a half-laugh, “I think Wire just managed to catch you right on the bone which is where the pain’s coming from. It’ll bruise and be painful to the touch, but shouldn’t bother you when you’re playing. Ice for twenty minutes every three hours over the next day, though, yeah? Just to be sure.”

It’s the most attentive he’s ever been. He grins at the physio as he thanks her then pushes up to hug her as well, hearing your laugh in the background at his ferocity. He even asks her name, wanting to thank Heather with the respect she deserves. The relief is buzzing through his whole body, so he doesn’t really think about it when he launches himself into your arms next.

He’s so glad he threw caution to the wind. You wind your arms around him tightly, clutching at his shoulder blades, pressing your chin into his collarbone. He buries his face in your neck just for one indulgent moment before he pulls away to arms length, still grinning.

“Knew you weren’t selfish,” you say, happily, squeezing his arms once before you let your hands drop.

“Couldn’t be when you’re so fuckin’ nice to me. Weirdo,” he says, trying not to blush too much at your new proximity, “Thank y’ for staying.”

You roll your eyes and brush it off, but he wishes you’d accept what he was saying because he meant it with his whole heart. Then he remembers he’d been avoiding you for days, and quickly needs to make it right.

“Oh, and anything you’ve got comin’ up the rest of the day, PR wise, I’m in. And the rest of the tournament, actually. Just put me name down on all the forms.”

“There are no forms, you nerd,” you laugh, but he can see a sliver of surprise on your face at his words. Maybe you had noticed his absence, “But I’ll consider you a sure thing when I need you.”

You’d said when I need you. Not when we need you. Just the wording made his grin wider.

“Good.”

“Good.”

“Would the two of you get the fuck out of my physio room now, please?”

Jamie jumped when Heather the physio spoke up. He definitely hadn’t completely forgotten she was there. The two of you apologised lowly and then scurried out of the room, only both laughing once you were out of there.

“Well, I’m gonna go back to trainin’ like I’ve risen from the dead,” Jamie says excitedly, “You comin’?”

“I’d better get back to work, I wasn’t even supposed to be pitchside anyway,” you admit, “I’m sure they’ll be very excited to have you back after a whole half hour without you.”

“Wonder how they’ve coped,” he agrees, shaking his head as he pretends to feel sorry for them.

“Gondo and Kips are coming by my office later for a new Instagram idea, do you want to join them? If you meant what you said, of course.”

“I did. I’ll see ya then,” he said, willing himself to just leave without hugging you again. He walks a few paces backwards.

“Great,” you agree, also walking a few paces backwards. He decides to be the one to turn away first, and he’s already running back to training, ankle feeling good as new now that it’s been iced and nobody’s pressing on it.

He thinks back to the stunning goal he scored earlier and suddenly he realises you would’ve been around to see it. It makes him beam as he jogs out onto the pitch to finish what he’d started.

[goldenpinof]

curious about your perspective – what do you think is the primary reason for the current comeback, and for the large scale of it (daily videos, new heavily marketed merch, etc)? are they trying to make up some monetary loss? is it true revitalized passion? the influence of the new management? lead-up to a major project/announcement? i'm guessing there's an element of at least the first three, but interested in your opinion as a noted non-cynical cynic (compliment btw)

under the cut because that's a lot. and it's not even all of my thoughts, unfortunately.

no one is gonna read it. but if you are, i'm sorry in advance.

ahaha. about merch. did you notice how they just continue to promote the calendar and the catboy sweater even though the initial release and promo had a deadline aka till December 1st? this is a fishy marketing right there. and i would love to know: why they did what they did (i'd assume they printed more calendars than people ordered by Dec 1st, but that's not our problem as customers. we shouldn't have been put into a framework in the 1st place if there was a chance for this shit to go south. this theory goes against the "pre-order" with a start of shipping in 2-3 weeks); why their managers allowed it (from a legal perspective); and why dnp didn't say anything. anyways.

i do think that Dan is trying to compensate for wad losses. and i know that he was "joking" about not making money or making negative money on tour. but i saw ticket sales a day before each show (only public information, not the inside official data from venues), it's still on my blog. and the sales didn't look good. so, how much of it was a joke? and compensating by making content that we and they enjoy isn't a bad thing, btw! i also think that he feels guilty for leaving us and the dnp brand behind for so long without actually giving us anything in return. thus so many comments on this 5-year hiatus and potential future ones. blame youtube originals, i know. not really his fault, but his choice of (the lack of) communication is his fault. and again, i always come back to wad. something fucking clicked in his head when he saw not as many people as he hoped for (or expected), how dedicated were some of those who still supported him during wad, and also he realised that without stronger managers he was not gonna make it solo. and he dragged Phil along because they do everything together and only then it works the best, and also dnpg's return in full force needed new energy for the amount of sponsorships they decided to do (i think, it's mainly Phil's pushing, because he is pro-sponsorships, they just need to be more careful with it on dnpg because Dan (hopefully) has principles when it comes to this. which is amazing. you go, girl!)

i'm very suspicious of dnp's new management right now. so idk. i think, again, most of it comes from Phil, because Phil thrives on their gaming channel, and that's basically the only easy way to survive on youtube and make money right now (for him). i'm glad dnp separated dnpg from their solo careers at least on the management and content levels. it gives Phil the room to use dnpg as a brand to pitch and fund his ideas/projects if it's ever needed. and now, after we survived the hiatus, they can pause dnpg for a couple of months to focus on their solo projects without losing the majority of the audience because technically we would know the reason and also we grew a thicker skin.

i do think that Dan is using dnpg to later help himself with a stand-up special or tour or some sort of series (danisnotokay). i also think he will use it to promote wad dvd (which is good. i will be disappointed if he doesn't use dnpg. like, bitch, why are we even here then? those who went through wad with him, i mean). i wonder if Inter Talent (i'm separating their name intentionally at his point because they piss me off) was smart enough to announce Dan and Phil's signings 2 weeks after UTA announced Dan to just make us pay attention to Dan's solo career again. as a hint of something coming our way. you know what i mean? i wonder if it was intentional. like UTA made a huge announcement, Dan retweeted it and posted it on instagram stories. it was a big deal. meanwhile, dnpg began thriving again and our eyes were on Dan anyway, so of course we noticed that solo career was on the maps again. Inter Talent was basically silent as another representative of Dan (and Phil), despite having them on the website for at least a month. and now 2 weeks after UTA's announcement (which was on November 22, 2023) Inter Talent was like, "hello? do you remember we signed Dan? and also Phil, and their joint channel?" Dan said wad dvd is almost cooked. wouldn't it be genius to stir our interest up step by step? (a part of me still thinks that Inter Talent's social media managers are just slow as fuck though. also they don't even care to check facts about their clients. UTA didn't fuck the announcement up like that, btw. and i doubt Inter Talent realises how nosy dnp's audience is, and that we are very likely gonna notice and spread even this stupid announcement. maybe they are dumb and it's me who is a fucking genius planning steps to present wad dvd to the masses, ugh. when will Dan pay me, like for real.)

i'm surprised you don't think it's heavily connected to new projects. i would bet my kidney it does. Dan will fuck off the moment he needs to focus on danisnotokay or someone offers to sponsor another tour (which, please, someone do. i need to see him for professional reasons). the question is, fuck off for how long and if it's gonna be communicated thoroughly or not. i'm not saying he will leave for 6 months without giving us something in return to balance things out. no, no, no. i don't think he would dare. but 3-4 weeks, maybe 2 months? sure.

is it true revitalized passion? well. *nervous laughter* i'm gonna defend Phil like i'm a phillie, even tho i'm not. he wanted it just as much as we did. so i believe it's a true revitalized passion at least on his part. i hope he fights for it if it's necessary, i hope he asks us for help if needed. i hope he threatens Dan with an actual divorce and forever home if needed. like, bitch, if there's a chance to keep dnpg alive without Dan actually losing his will to live, we should use that chance. Dan's stubbornness and delulus are not the reason to kill the most fun and profitable thing they ever created aka dnp brand. let it exist, even if alongside solo projects, even if it's 2-3 videos a month. damn, even 1 video (i don't mean during pauses made specifically for the peaks of solo projects). i do think Dan enjoys the attention, money, and possibilities their returned audience can give him. he also enjoys working with Phil. he certainly does not enjoy promoting their videos. and he is lucky he has Phil for that. is it a true passion for the gaming channel and joint branding solemnly? i genuinely don't think so. now, this dnp brand puts Dan into a framework, unfortunately. and i understand his desire to grow as a "strong independent Dan", and i wish him the best. i will root for him no matter how much of a floppy-ding-dong it can potentially be. i want him to fulfill his dreams and have a team that will fight for his interests. and i hope to god, UTA and Inter Talent are the ones. don't fucking tempt me with your unprofessionalism. but do i think Dan's head and heart belong to dnpg or dnp brand? no. i'm happy that he is at least trying. a part of me doesn't even care about the reason. i'm curious, but in hindsight, it wouldn't matter or change anything.

other thoughts, because apparently i decided to vomit on a keyboard tonight:

i'm glad dnp took back a bit of control over the editing on dnpg. i hope they will try to edit more themselves when gamingmas is over. or they will teach their editors better. because man, we need to slow down with these cuts.

i do think that dnp brand will expand, and dnpg and merch aren't the only things we should expect. (twitch, podcast or liveshows, onlyfans or its equivalent, vlogging series not limited by ditl, and other things that i forgot). reaction videos are already a thing and it's very funny because it's what youtube wants, so Dan must feel amazing right now falling for it :)) it's good thought because it's fun and torture for all parties involved.

i think by these reaction videos they are trying to rewrite their internet history a little bit for those who are new. it's not gonna work with us but at least dnp can control the narrative in new people's heads (i wonder for how long though).

with new people, the phandom will become more generic and dnp will love that. it can actually help Dan with new projects i think. Phil as well, but we don't know shit about it right now.

i wonder if Dan returns to working with charities.

if they involve more phannies, not only artists, it's gonna be interesting.

in case i'm wrong, don't step on my neck, i don't know anything for a fact. half of it is alleged, the other half is wishful thinking <3

[prince-liest]

The specific phrasing of “hurt very pretty” is. I knew before this series I was more into the soft sadism/dom thing but it’s soooo rare to find someone who does the exact flavor I’m into and I think that phrase in my head sooooo often

Ahaha, I'm so glad you're enjoying it! I've always really liked, as you describe it, soft sadism, where it's about the intimacy, the connection, and the sort of delightfully recursive loop you get when the suffering is enjoyed, and the enjoyment of the suffering also contributes to the suffering, whether it be via enthusiasm or humiliation. Funnily enough, despite the kind of stuff that I write, S&M that feels genuinely callous and miserable is fully capable of squicking me if it hits just wrong. I really like writing sadism that feels tender, even when it's violent.

Five more asks under the cut! If you sent something about 666 in the past 24-ish hours, it's probably there!

Your newest channel 666 fic had me so mixed on how to feel "Oh ok they're drunk and Al's on his lap... that wasn't in the tags oh no vox isn't advancing... nevermind he's electrocuting Al, i get it, a little something to get the blood pumping oh no wait he's actually electrocuting him oh good lord he's screaming in pain"

Hahaha, god, tagging this chapter was really a fucking nightmare - if there's anything you think I missed that's important to include, PLEASE let me know, because I tried to cover my bases but I really had to give up after a bit. It's just One Of Those Chapters and the first time I've used the Graphic Violence archive warning for something that was just fully consensual sexy times, haha. I hope it was at least enjoyable overall! Alastor certainly had a good time.

I've binged your 666 series and it irreversibly changed my brain chemistry It's more canon than everything that happened in the show itself to me - @grimfeywizard

Ahhhh, thank you so much! >:D I definitely tried to mimic the style of canon for the characters, especially for the first installments before they kinda went their own way character development wise, haha. I'm glad you like it!! <3

I was at a convention all weekend and when you updated BOTH times I snuck out of my group and into a corner to read them I am completely obsessed with this series 🙏🙏🙏 -@urlocal-cryptid7

Omg, glad to add the cherry on top of your con experience, hahaha. Thank you so much!!

hey there, just wanted to say i’m absolutely enraptured with the 666 series! it’s absolutely amazing and one of my favorite fics out there right now. i’m always looking forward to it and checking for updates, great work!!!!

Ahhhh, thank you for the kind words!! I'm really enjoying writing it in all of its weirdnesses, so it's always so nice to hear that people are enjoying the odd directions it goes!

Another fun radiostatic song: The Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer - @butwhyaretheycalledstrawberries

This is 100% what I had playing in the car on repeat when I wrote one of the previous installments, hahaha. It's a fantastic radiostatic song, especially with the level of sadomasochism I write into 666.

(Anon who was awaiting the drunk Alastor shenanigans here) Me, pre-installment 8 of 666: Oh My God, it’s happening. Everybody STAY CALM- Me, post-installment 8 of 666: *ugly sobbing* it was everything i could ever hope for, your honor. The Prince(TM) is good and merciful. So yeah, expectations met as always 👍

Omg, ehehehe - drunk Alastor was honestly SO fun to write, because it's just... taking away a lot of his worries and inhibitions, and the behaviors that normally accompany them. I took what Mimzy said about him being a kitten when he's had a few drinks and lets loose and ran with it, and it turned out very enjoyable. I'm glad you also had a good time reading, hahaha!

[kmmachilles]

heres the list of my favourite shadowhunter couples from all the series (not including twp for obvious reasons) bc i cant sleep

TID: Gideon n Sophie. I KNOW KNOW EVERYONE LOOVES HERONGRAYSTAIRS I DO TOO THEYRE MY HEART ND SOUL but gideon n sophie man. cmon. theres sweet hurt sophie that thinks men like gideon r assholes bc of her former employers son and will, and gideon REINFORCES that by constantly talking in spanish while hes actually absolutely down BAD for sophie. she thinks shes not good enough for him, her being a mundane 'servant' and 'ugly' from her scarred face and him being the eldest son carrying the great shadowhunter lightwood name. and then hes just there ordering scones to his room just to see sophie, and ending up stashing them under the bed bc he doesn't even LIKE them. and pretty, smart sophie, although FURIOUS at first, goes 'so yea u dont like scones. what about SPONGE CAKES???????? THEYRE MY SPECIALTY' and then he falls so in love with her and proceeds to tell everyone hes marrying her before even proposing to her. i love them.

TLH: Alastair n Thomas. i love love love them not only their pair but them as separate characters too. esp bc the two didnt have the kind of shit the other ships had to deal with like james n cordelia were 'OH HE LOVES GRACE BUT I LOVE HIM / OH I LOVE GRACE BUT IM MARRIED TO CORDELIA / I SHOULD RUN AWAY W MATTHEW / fuck im in love with cordelia.' and lucie n jesse were like 'IM IN LOVE W A GHOST WHO'S THE SON OF A WOMAN WHO HATES MY FAMILY / shes only in love w me bc im a ghost and she likes writing stories so im one of her stories SHE DOESNT REALLY LOVE ME BUT I LOVE HER BUT IM A GHOST SO I CANT *REALLY* LOVE HER PROPERLY LIKE SHE DESERVES' and ari and anna were like 'OH I LOVE HER BUT I WANT KIDS SO I'LL MARRY CHARLES WHO, BTW, IS GAY :3 / OH I LOVE HER but im a stony heartbreaker women, lock your daughters and then yourselves im coming after you / oh my god i cant marry charles I LOVE YOU ANNA TAKE ME BAACK / ha! im stony heartbreaker.' and we all know the problem w matthew n cordelia, and alastair and charles AND grace and christopher (my heart stopped beating i swear to you). like i know Alastair and thomas definitely HAD to overcome some shit but Thomas KNEW he liked guys and alastair and alastair was pr sure about it too so when they got together, they GOT together ykwim??? no hanky panky. plus theres also the 'thomas-is-basically-michelangelos-david' so yea. no brainer. theyre my fav.

TMI: Alec and Magnus. okay so this is for both obvious reasons (fan favourite) and some other personal ones. Living where i do, i had no idea you could like the same gender as yourself or ltr anything about the LGBTQ+ community at all. These two were the first gay ship i had EVER read and they are what lead me to be as confident in my sexuality as i am right now. they introduced me to the concept of thinking beyond what i was told or shown by the people that surround me and look into the world the right way, without projecting judgement. i love them for that. theyre my comfort characters and the one of the biggest reasons i am who i am right now. also magnus is pr much why i adore glitter and i manage to put it on my face every other day ahaha

TDA: Diana n Gwynn. a very, very close second is Mark n Cristina n Keiran. but about Diana and Gwynn, they literally have my entire soul im not even kidding you. Gwyn is the first person Diana opens up to about her transition and its honestly so heartwarming that Gwyn, the leader of the Wild Hunt, known to be vicious and feared by faerie, is literally just there for her to lean on. He supports her and is so, so calm and soft with her it genuinely melts me. like, this man is basically the reaper of souls and he rides a magnificent steed into the night but hes so gentle with Diana. obviously my obsession w them is reinforced by the fact that the FIRST time Gwynn sees Diana he goes 'O' and is all like 'HELLO my fair lady beautiful one gorgeous strong lovely lady' and gives her an acorn like 'call me ;)' and diana my love just, THROWS the acorn to julian and emma and goes 'do w that whatever u will' and acts like she doesnt care and when they call on gwyn he comes to help nd immediately goes '...THAT WASNT FOR YOU but ig i'll help bc ur the magnificent lady's brats :/'

so yes thats it. now pls, whatever fucking ghost is haunting me with these thoughts, PLEASE LET ME SLEEP

[mystwrites]

Belated Birthday Gift!

Summary: Tanjiro didn’t tell Rengoku when his birthday was. As a result, Rengoku decides to have a little fun with his tsuguko during training

A/N: Tanjiro’s birthday was yesterday so happy birthday to that sweet boy!!

Tanjiro’s eyes went wide one moment and then the next, he was shrieking and giggling as he lay on the grass, Rengoku’s fingers poking and prodding up and down his ribs and sides. It started off as a normal day, meeting up to train, however Rengoku had a different plan in mind. Rengoku decided to start with an ab workout and while Tanjiro couldn’t complain since he was able to lie down for the first half of his training session, he couldn’t do much to protect himself once Rengoku began poking and prodding up and down his sides, telling him to keep his core engaged.

To be fair, his birthday had been the day before and he failed to tell Rengoku. He found out from Inosuke, Zenitsu, Genya, Kanao and Muichiro. Rengoku said this was a little belated birthday gift and suddenly started tickling him after he decided to stop poking around his sides but Tanjiro knew it was just a playful punishment for not telling him about his birthday. There was no way Tanjiro could complain and say he hated this. If anything, Tanjiro was having fun, laughing and squirming on the grass.

“Rehehengoku sahahahan!! Ihihi’m sohohorry!!” Tanjiro squealed, Rengoku now kneeling next to him and letting his fingers dance all over the boy’s ribs, making their way up to his armpits. “Nonono!! Hahaha!! Nohohot my ahaharmpits!!”

“Sorry, young Kamado! But this is your belated birthday gift from me! Hey! Ahaha! Don’t try to stop the tickles!” Rengoku chuckled, watching Tanjiro try his best to slap his hands away.

“You ahahalways tihihickle mehehehe!!” Tanjiro whined, shrieking as Rengoku gently dug his fingers into his armpits.

“Yes, when you’re discouraged or you mess up your breathing. Other than that, I hardly tickle you, my boy! Is this you saying I should tickle you more often, ESPECIALLY on your birthday??” Rengoku prompted, suddenly tickling the sensitive spot above Tanjiro’s knees.

All he could reply with was a frantic head shake. Tanjiro couldn’t help but squirm and attempt to get away. It was out of pure instinct but once Rengoku’s fingers successfully worked their way up and down to his thighs, Tanjiro resorted to curling up and laughing his head off. He honestly hadn’t received birthday tickles since his thirteenth birthday and found himself to be very happy in this moment, laughing as Rengoku tickled him silly.

Now that the tickles we’re heading towards his stomach, Tanjiro’s laughter grew, now unable to protest as Rengoku’s fingers skittered and scribbled up and down his sides in quick successions before he started clawing at his belly. Tanjiro couldn’t fight him off even if he wanted to, rolling around for a few seconds before letting out the loudest fits of belly laughter he’s ever heard himself make.

“Ohh?” Rengoku observed, chuckling as Tanjiro’s laughter reached new heights upon poking him in the stomach. “Is this your worst spot? This tummy of yours?”

Shaking his head, Tanjiro flailed for a few seconds only to give in, curling up around Rengoku’s hands as his stomach was clawed at. His legs kicked out and Tanjiro gasped as he suddenly let out a loud snort, his cheeks blushing with embarrassment as his hands flew up to his mouth, covering up his giggles. Rengoku easily removed Tanjiro’s hands, smiling as he saw the bright pink cheeks and the happy smile. Scribbling from his hips up to his armpits and back down to the center of his belly, Rengoku laughed, hearing another series of snorts escape.

“Happy belated birthday, young Kamado!!” Rengoku shouted, giving Tanjiro’s hair a ruffle, deciding that he had enough birthday tickles. “Now that your ab workout is complete, let’s do some sword swings!”

Tanjiro gasped for air, curled up on the grass still, not responding, just giggling hysterically from the residual tickles.

“Unless you want more tickles?” Rengoku added, squeezing Tanjiro’s sides. “I can certainly tickle you a little more if that’s what you want!”

“GYAAHAHAHA!! GIHIHIMME AHAHAHA BREHEHEATHER!!! I’LL DOHOHO THE SWOHOHORD SWIHIHINGS!!” Tanjiro screamed, flailing until Rengoku stopped. “PLEHEHEASE REHEHENGOKU SAHAHAN!!”

“Ahaha! Alright, alright!” Rengoku chuckled, patting Tanjiro’s back. “Five minute break. Then we resume training. Happy belated birthday, Tanjiro!”

Tanjiro smiled, thanking Rengoku for the birthday wishes, resting for a few minutes before getting up and swinging a wooden katana.

[ashwii]

THOUSAND YEAR DOOR FOREVER! That will always be one of my favorite games of all-time! I played it so much as a kid & it was my first RPG ever & I just love everything about it & it's so fun! And when I started replaying it again earlier this year it was still just as fun,& I discovered some new strategies to use with badges & I even learned how to Superguard.

Oh MAN dont even get me started! TTYD was one of the earliest games I remember playing as a kid. Like "couldn't even read yet" age ahaha.

How did I even manage to play the game without knowing how to read, you may ask ,,, Man idek, but I knew I had fun XDD

From then, it's always had a special place in my heart. Beautiful worlds and characters, a really interesting story I fell in love with as I grew older, So many weird little details that I just love so much. I've always gone back to a lot of Mario games over the years, but TTYD was one that I consistently went back to ALL the time, Constantly thinking about it and wishing there was more in the series like it, day-dreaming for that true return to form some day. TLDR I really love TTYD a lot, and mario games in general XD

[infiniteeight8]

Okay ahhh this is the first time I’ve ever written a prompt I guess?? But after reading like,, most,, of your writings, I honestly just wanted to complement you.

I absolutely ADORE your Ironstrange soul series and am always eager to read more :D (honestly I adore all ur mini series but still)

I know you’ve just finished writing one but I feel as though you enjoy this story just as much as we do ahaha

*beams* Thanks so much! Both for the lovely feedback and for sending in a prompt!

At this point, no one is surprised that this one got long, are they? LOL. Under a read more for length.

Edit: I almost forgot! You can find the first few Tony & Soul ficlets here.

-

Ever since Soul started sharing Stephen’s emotions with Tony, being around him feels like being wrapped in a soft blanket. Call it affection, fondness, friendship; whatever word you used, it felt very, very nice. It also made it kind of hard to be annoyed with him.

“I don’t need to meditate,” Tony argues, sitting cross-legged across from Stephen on the floor of one of the practice rooms. It was nicely padded, at least. “I can just ask Soul.”

“Oh, certainly,” Stephen says dryly. “So when you fly the armor, you just sit there and let FRIDAY do all the work?”

Tony scowled. “You know I don’t.”

Stephen groaned. “And you know that I’m trying to make a point.” A small orange spike shot through the soft blanket feeling.

Well, at least if Tony couldn’t quite be annoyed, Stephen could be annoyed for him.

“I’m not a wizard,” Tony grumbles.

“Neither am I.” Despite the words, a bright flare of amusement illuminates Stephen’s emotions. “Look, don’t think of it as meditation, if that helps,” Stephen goes on. “This of it as…” Tony can feel him casting about for the words, and then a shot of satisfaction as he finds them “...learning a new user interface. Sometimes it’ll be easier to ask Soul for information, like asking FRIDAY. But sometimes it’ll be faster, and easier, to just access the data directly.”

That makes sense. Damn it. Tony sighs. “Okay, fine. Remind me what we were doing?”

“Soul can sense the connections between people,” Stephen says. “You want to try to sense them for yourself.”

“Sense?” Tony groans. “I’m not psychic, Merlin.”

“The word does also apply to the five senses you already have,” Stephen says dryly. “Your perception can represent them however you’re comfortable with processing the data.”

Well, Tony always had been an extremely visual person. There was a reason he built holograms into everything. Closing his eyes, he takes a deep breath. Soul?

I’m not supposed to do it for you, Soul reminds him.

Yeah, I know. But if I’m accessing a new UI, I need to know where the on button is, right? Just show me that.

Soul considers for a moment. Very well. Relax. Open yourself to me.

Christ, magic was full of hand wavy bullshit. ‘Open yourself to me.’ Still, Tony concentrats on his breathing and tries to relax. Slowly, everything seems to go quiet around him. The feeling that there’s something just on the edge of his vision—closed eyes and all—starts to grow. Tony’s brow wrinkles. He tries to reach, but it seems to retreat. “It feels like I’m nudging it with my fingertips,” he mutters, “and it keeps rolling away.” 

“May I?”

Tony has no idea what Stephen was suggesting, but he nods anyway. Abruptly, the shallow sense he has of Stephen’s emotions deepens like the bottom has fallen out of a well and revealed an ocean. Tony catches his breath, and then it’s like Stephen’s hand is on his, showing him how to lift just enough that the thing he’s reaching for is under his fingertips instead of in front of them. As he makes contact, the sense of that ocean vanishes.

Tony opens his eyes. “Holy shit!” He’s surrounded by threads of light. No, not surrounded—they’re coming out of him.

“Tony? Is everything okay?”

Tony blinks and focuses on Stephen and realizes that one of the strands is connecting him and Stephen, except this one can hardly be called a thread. It’s more like a cord, a good inch in diameter.

“Tony!” Astringent concern floods the soft affection that emanated from Stephen. He’s on his knees now, hands coming to rest on Tony’s shoulders.

“I’m okay,” Tony says. Blinking some more, he manages to meet Stephen’s eyes and smile reassuringly. “Just, I’ve got the new UI working and there’s a lot more information than I was expecting.”

Slowly, Stephen lets his hands slide from Tony’s shoulders. He sits back a little, but stays close. “What does it look like?”

“Like thousands of threads radiating out from me,” Tony says. “They’re all orange, like Soul. There are a few thicker ones, too. There’s one between you and me, and one… Whew. That one’s big.” It’s almost as thick as his wrist, and it stretches off into the distance. Pepper, maybe?

“Concentrate on it,” Stephen suggests. “You should be able to identify the person on the other end.”

Tony stares at it for a moment, but that doesn’t help, so he reaches out carefully, like he would with a hologram, and taps it. Rhodey’s face fills his mind's eye and he grins. “It’s Rhodey.”

“Well done,” Stephen says warmly, and Tony looks back at him, enjoying the buoyant feeling of admiration. “What about the others?”

Looking around, Tony finds another thicker cord. It’s not as solid as the one with Stephen, but definitely substantial. Curious, Tony touches it and sees Pepper. He lets go and swallows hard. “Assuming the thick cords are with people important to me,” he says, “what are all these thin ones?”

“I could guess, but I assume Soul can tell you,” Stephen says.

Anyone who thinks about you regularly has a connection with you, Soul explains. You have many because you are very well known. Most have never met you. 

Tony relates that to Stephen, frowning. “I’m not sure I like being connected to people I’ve never met, who I never asked to be connected to.”

“It’s only a representation,” Stephen reassures him. “You matter to people, Tony. As a hero, or a role model, or a business interest. That’s the same as it ever was.”

“But with Soul, it’s more than just a representation, isn’t it?” Tony touches the connection between him and Stephen lightly. He doesn’t try to affect it, but he knows he could. Soul sends a feeling of affirmation and Tony knows that Stephen has received it as well from the way his expression goes thoughtful.

“Well,” Stephen says eventually, “I suppose that’s one of the responsibilities of being a stone bearer. They bring us power, and we have to choose how to use it, and when. I could turn back time every time the outcome of some encounter displeased me. I don’t, because I know these abilities aren’t to be used lightly.”

Tony takes a breath. “I’m not sure I’m the guy you want carrying that kind of power around.”

Stephen laughs and Tony shoots him an offended look. “I’m sorry,” Stephen says, still chuckling. “I don’t mean to make light of your concerns, but of everyone in the world, you’d be my first choice to carry that kind of power around. You chose to protect people when you could have lived a life of ease. But more than that, between your wealth, your genius, and your fame, you have plenty of experience with influence and how seductive it is and how careful you have to be with it.” Stephen smiles at Tony. “I can’t think of a better man to wield Soul.”

It’s all Tony can do to hold back the blush. He clears his throat and tries to keep his tone light. “Thanks for the vote of confidence.”

It comes out a little too sincere, but that isn’t too scary with the soft blanket of Stephen’s affection wrapped around him.