#ah I'm so neurodivergent

[krash-8]

its almost a week into October does that mean I can be insane about every ghost related media known to man now

[blorboresidue]

I really wish I could find my glasses :(

[gynoidgearhead]

[Image caption for original post: quote as follows. It is attributed "John Waters on the sorry state of today's rebels (WSJ)". Begin quote.]

"When I was young there were beatniks. Hippies. Punks. Gangsters. Now you're a hacktivist. Which I probably would be if I was 20. Shuttin' down Mastercard. But there's no look to that lifestyle! Besides just wearing a bad outfit with bad posture. Has Wikileaks caused a look? No! I'm mad about that. If your kid comes out of the bedroom and says he just shut down the government, it seems to me he should at least have an outfit for that."

[End quote.]

 the only criticism of millennials l accept

[plasticstrawsmuggler]

When I was like 10(?) I got this book from the La Brea Tar Pits called "Big Cats and Their Fossil Ancestors" that was essentially an in depth breakdown of the evolution of modern day cat species and how they differ from extinct cats. I read it from cover to cover and looking back on it that was probably a sign that I was not neurotypical.

[thurio-edau]

SBG GANG MENTAL ANALYSIS

yup, him for part two. funny thing despite Aiden being my favourite character I'm most excited for the other three posts I'll make, especially the last one. there's a lot to unpack here so

also im writing this with a migraine pls read it-

Part 2: Aiden Clark

ah, yes. the obviously-mentally-ill from the start fan favourite Aiden Clark. let's go.

first, I want to start with something I find really important about his character, what makes him heavily mischaracterized in the fandom. the 'psychopath' cliche.

the terms 'psychopath', 'insane' and 'unstable' are often confused with each other due to media stereotypes, such as Aiden here. one, he is not a psychopath. psychopath literally means a self-centered person who lacks sympathy, affection and care; making them far from most other characters in their franchise. their lack of sympathy/empathy often makes them criminalized, here

disturbing content warning, for an example of a psychopath.

let's take Gressil from Homesick for example since a lot of SBG readers also read Homesick. so, here, Gressil is a perfect example of an actual psychopath. his lack of empathy makes him torment others, he's very self-centered. and when asked why he's doing this? he says he was bored. let's look at Aiden here. what does Aiden do when bored? probably dumb ideas or annoy Tyler. not torturing people for fun. Aiden is just a boy who likes thrills, but he has a sense of empathy, care and justice.

you wanna see a psychopathic Aiden?? the canvas is it

(our local Logan hater is publishing the canvas eps go checc beachy out)

but that's him, not our Aiden. canvas does not equal originals y'all

alright, now since we got that cleared out!! firstly, ADHD.

I think everyone in the fandom is already aware that Aiden is ADHD but I'm still going to talk about it just like Ashlyn's autism. Red has also said that she wrote Aiden with ADHD in mind but hadn't canonically confirmed anyone as neurodivergent. let's start with the main symptoms of ADHD, also known as Attention Decifit and Hyperactivity Disorder.

I know about 5 different ADHD people myself and did some research, it probably won't be extremely accurate since I'm not ADHD myself, but I'll try to do whatever I can. first with the AD part, Attention Decifit.

now as seen, he doesn't exactly have any problems with theorizing itself. but the problem is that his attention just goes away easily.

i mean cmon bro was making memes on the job

he tries to do work, but can't. he has a low attention span which makes him not able to concentrate. he can't keep it up for long, he'll get distracted or bored too easily about things that doesn't interest in specially.

it's just distracting. what his attention is on constantly changes, there's more to that after the ADHD part but we're here for now.

the hyperactivity... it's a lot more apparent. but I should explain the insane-unstable thing before that.

insane means that someone's mental health is not in an okay situation, where it prevents the person from thinking normally, acting rationally, very often found together with delusions. the person is seriously mentally ill where it might count as a disability.

unstable, however, where someone is prone to psychiatric problems, has moodswings etc. they're not exactly the most sane person, but they aren't insane either. Aiden here, obviously falls on the unstable side. maybe just a little bit insane if you squint. this will be brought up later too, but it mixed well with his hyperactivity too.

and as we all know, our boy isn't exactly the most stable person. (sorry for the collages, but since there is a tumblr picture limit i have to keep on collaging. yes i learnt from the last time) his hyperactivity mixes with his unstable mindset which makes him incresingly vulnerable to danger- which he likes. from when the first shift happened, he's been really careless about stuff but it's been all about his love for thrill.

and it irritates Tyler, too.

the main subplot about his character is that he's a person of excitement. guess what? ADHD people like the excitement, they like new things, they like the adrenaline and thrill. now, Aiden's main characteristic of being unstable mixed with ADHD makes him an even more reckless person. another thing mixing with the hyperactivity, is boundaries.

this part will mostly be about Ashlyn since the boundary issue only happens with her.

I talked about this on Ashlyn's side on my Ashlyn analysis, now it's time for Aiden's side.

he's really annoying to her at first. Ashlyn is someone with lots of boundaries, like high walls. and who tries to climb them with his dumbass? Aiden of course.

she kept rejecting his efforts to befriend her for some time, until the night they stole the jeep. then she managed to actually bring the walls down, and accept them all into her life. but damn was she blunt.

felt that honestly

and Aiden understands her that night, too.

Ashlyn was hesistant to hug him, yes, he was aware. but she still did which made him realize she was also trying. i have to tell you, people with ADHD and people with autism either have trouble getting along, or go perfectly well. my ADHD sibling for example, I have to push them away for a lot and tell them to lower their voice. but once they remember my boundaries it actually becomes a normal, even pleasant hangout. which, Aiden realizes and tries to get along with. he tries.

seeing his efforts on her boundaries makes something click in her mind. and she starts to be a lot nicer when they hang out in the arcade.

Aiden eventually learns and remembers what she's like and what she loves to do. he already tried to watch her ballet sessions once -got slammed-, he's been to her room where he remembered the mat from and her fighting makes it obvious. I'm sure he knew he'd get cooked by betting that. but he still did,

because he knew it'd interest her. which he succeeded, he saw her smile again. the arcade day went great until Barron and his gang pulled up, but if we ignore that part it all went well. Aiden started to understand and respect her boundaries.

anyways then Tyler fucking dies

he knows that Ashlyn feels guilty. Aiden wants to comfort her through it, but also do it correctly. without going over any boundaries. which makes him really,

really,

really surprised when she responds.

also including this pannel cause its hilarious

here we see that he's still trying. hell, I'm sure he spent minutes thinking if he should come close physically to help her. that's probably why he just nudged her softly before anything else. he's not used to it, he has to conciously make an effort to not cross said boundaries. keeping his voice lower, try to not be so reckless, not doing anything physically close unless she reciprocates. wow how i wish another someone i knew irl tried that hard instead of blaming it on me cOUGH COUGH COUGH

also other small things to include

he's yapping a lot

he has a comically large amount of puzzles in his backpack for one single trip

and sticks his head into lamps for some reason

but that's just Aiden and his little neurodivergent brain for ya.

now the part I wanted to get to the most.

Borderline Personality Disorder.

first, what is Borderline Personality Disorder?

shortened as BPD, borderline is when someone's mood is inconsistent and swinging. think of it's name; the person's mental state is in the border, in the border line, switching up fastly. the most easily understood and common type is when the person goes from a depression to a happy state. but no matter which state they are in and/or go to, one thing stays the same: it is unstable.

one thing about borderline is that it is frequently mixed with bipolar. however bipolar is a neurodivengercy which means it is what someone is born with and cannot be changed. but borderline is obtained later in life. it usually happens with depression. bipolar is much more random and the episodes last longer in comparison. it may last up to hours, and the person's memory might have trouble remembering their episodes. borderline, on the other hand, is a short-lived mood swing.

now here. here's the catch; people with BPD during mood swings can have reckless behaviour, suicidal thoughts -in his case as far as we know, lowered sense of protecting himself- or a loss of understanding danger. sounds familiar?

borderline's recklessness and dangerousness, sometimes self-destructive acts combines with ADHD's love for thrill and excitement, combined with Aiden's own personality all make up for a great condition of instability.

Aiden's behaviour constantly goes crazy, I think his most frequent mood swing might be his normal self (at least, as normal as he could be) to this more maniac way of acting. I noticed it from his eyes, when he's in a more calm-ish normal state his pupils are a bit more dilated. in the pictures above, you can clearly see that he's still in the episode; filled with the adrenaline, the unstable way of thinking.

but, what causes that? surely a mental illness such as borderline doesn't happen on it's own.

right?

cause it didn't.

it never works that way.

but it can get better.

eventually.

but what happened to him?

personally, as much as a large amounnt of people seems to believe it's something like family abuse I don't think so. maybe neglect, maybe withdrawal, maybe maybe. but we've seen his parents. I don't think they would hurt him like that. I can't put any more pictures, but this is the last part anyway. his parents seem to be kind and gentle, despite that picture in his house. I'm thinking the picture was only for the dramatic effect. his parents said that he used to be really calm and quiet during Lily's birthday, and both Aiden and Ben seem comfortable around them. they were happy taking Ben in too, any kind of abusive parent wouldn't do that at least that's what I believe. also there is that Aiden got serious and concerned when he learnt that their parents were also in the facility, most likely worried for his own as you would have thought.

there was a post that I've been trying to find for like half an hour, I commented on it but I can't find the post now. the person talked about their own theory. if I remember correctly it was that when Aiden was depressive as a child, his parents took him to a thrilling activity like the ones he's been talking about (bungee-jumping, skydiving etc.) and the thrill made him actually get excited. which is why his parents allowed him to go even more reckless, because they are aware of how prone their son could be to the depression.

what happened? let's ignore the parents factor. someone can have a loving family and still be traumatized, someone can be taken care of and still feel abandoned, someone can never have confronted a situation they are terrified of.

one of my theories is that, the loneliness. it must get to a child heavily considering children need to not be left alone, but Aiden was. he didn't have any actual friends since they always moved from one place to another from his parents' business, and they might have not had enough time to make for him (which I believe is bullshitting, every child deserves to be taken some time out for. some people quit their jobs entirely for their child.) and be unaware, and that doesn't change that he was still depressed and alone. his depressive state was seemingly before Ben was taken in. now here one thing with borderline, at least from my experience, is faking actions. smiles, laughs, friendships, conversations... almost as if there's two different lives; one fake, and one real. you keep on switching, you keep on swinging between the sides where you're yourself and where you're just mimicking 'normal human behaviour'.

it starts from faking a happy state during their depression, and by time you're faking it it becomes an automatic adition to your personality. to your mind. once it furthers, it becomes the disorder. Aiden we see is always smiling. it becomes a habit that only breaks sometimes. now, I'm not saying his smile is fake- I think his face is literally just stuck like that. it breaks ever so slightly sometimes. fake it till ya make it yanno? that kind of thing. and when he swings from his calm mood to his borderline-d mood, his pupils get small and his smile gets worse. noticably worse. I'll be rereading the series (AGAIN) and this time look at all the small details since Red loves putting them and I love theorizing so

which, wraps up the Aiden thing! im actually really proud of how i could put my thoughts into text which i never could. i'd love any additions because i love other opinions as well.

and you know what? im glad Ash and Ai are out of the place because the rest are what I'm actually looking forward to >:)

...and i should sleep. really.

(wow sorry yall i finished this hours ago and said 'alright reread to make sure its good before sleep' and fell asleep through it lol sorry for 4 hour delay ig)

(leaving for school rn see yall 8 hours later 🫡)

[youling-the-ghost]

Technically, it's both!

Botanically, the fruit is the ripened ovary of a plant that contains seeds. Technically the word "cucumber" also encompasses the vines on which the fruits grow, but it's used almost exclusively to refer to the fruit colliqually. If you want to get really specific with the pedantics, you can call the cucumber by its scientific name (cucumis sativus), but only nerds do that (/lh).

Meanwhile, a vegetable is defined as "a plant or part of a plant used as food, such as a cabbage, potato, carrot, or bean". So technically, all fruits are vegetables! The term "vegetable" actually has no set botanical definition, and it's mostly been used as a buzzword make something sound healthier (similar to the term "superfood" in a way). Here's an interesting video on the topic.

(this is totally not just a reason for me to promote Food Theory)

Weird conclusion, I know, but technically none of the boys are wrong! Unless they were arguing against it being a fruit and/or vegetable, in that case they were all horribly wrong.

watching a livestream and the guys just spent a whole two minutes arguing over wether a cucumber is a fruit or a vegetable I love these idiots

[pikatrainer99]

Kieran is autistic and you can't change my mind!

Okay, I KNOW that I'm not the only one who holds this headcanon...but I wanted to do an analysis on Kieran anyway, especially since my best friend @sinnohanvulpix said she'd love to see me do one. Credit to her for all the screenshots used btw. The GIFs on the other hand were either found on Google Images or created by me using gifrun.com and these YouTube videos:

I did not use my own footage for this at all...as proof here's what MY character in the game looks like...he has my real name but I tried to make him look like Orange which is why he has the orange eyes 😅

(Sorry for the bad quality btw...taking pictures of my Switch screen is hard 😅)

Okay, now without further ado, let's get started with the analysis!

First, Kieran has a CLEAR special interest in Ogerpon, he admires and looks up to her, he was obsessed with the story of the ogre, he was always trying to go to her den and meet her, he has a meltdown when Ogerpon chooses the player over him, etc. Carmine even says that Kieran "really really REALLY likes the ogre" and that made me think, "Ah! Special interest!"

And then at the end of the Teal Mask he gains a new special interest in getting stronger to beat the player...and he hyperfocuses HARD on that...to the point of it being detrimental to both his physical and mental health, as he was doing nothing but training during that time...he barely ate, barely slept, just trained...and that is not healthy. It's a rare example of media showcasing a special interest being unhealthy and absolutely CONSUMING one's life, and the consequences do actually show for it.

Kieran is very introverted and doesn't know how to make friends very well. I actually think the player is his first friend considering his surprised reaction when the player says they consider him a friend, and following this, he quickly becomes a bit...too attached to the player, as he doesn't quite understand how friendships work.

(This is also such a neurodivergent way to say "I'm so happy I finally have a friend")

He also struggles socially, as is a requirement for autistic people to qualify for a diagnosis. Kieran specifically has a hard time reading social cues, he struggles with making eye contact, he has clear anxiety when talking to people as proven by his little stutter he has at times.

(This is an adorable screenshot 🥺)

He also struggles with social and emotional processing (and might have alexithymia as well due to his sudden huge outbursts of emotion), and he also struggles with initiating conversation as well, as seen when he tries to talk to Penny at the League Club. They both have no idea how to even start a conversation with each other and it's honestly pretty adorable seeing the two quiet adorkable kids trying their best to hold conversation. I get it, you two, initiating conversation is really difficult for me too.

Also the way they try to start the conversation by talking about the weather...that's really funny and ironic to me because that's what NTs do all the time. NTs always use the weather as a small-talk conversation starter but NDs like me (and Kieran and Penny too apparently) just don't get that stuff.

(These two are so neurodivergent it's great and I love them both 🥺)

Kieran also has four in-game animations that I personally see as stimming. The first one is him tapping his fist against his hip when he's thinking or nervous.

(Focus your attention to his hand here and you'll see it.)

The second one is him playing with a strand of loose hair, usually when he's nervous.

(The little nervous side glance at the player is relatable and adorable 🥺)

The third one is a more agitated stim that he only does ONCE in the entire game...and that is tapping the front of his foot on the ground. I do that myself when I'm agitated or impatient, somehow it's comforting, especially since for some reason I really like the way my shoes sound when I tap them on the ground... especially since I got my brand new Infernape-themed shoes, they sound extra satisfying because they're brand new.

(This is not the way most people tap their foot...I've never seen an NT do it like this...only other NDs such as myself and one of my brothers)

The fourth and final one is, unfortunately, a stress stim...Kieran runs his hands very fast through his hair and it also looks like, to me anyway as someone who has self-injurious stims myself, that he is digging his nails into his scalp as well while doing that. I do something similar myself, though on top of running my hands through my hair and digging my nails into my scalp, I also pull at my hair...yeah... self-injurious stims are no joke...and I'm kinda glad Kieran's autism coding brings attention to that aspect of autism...at least in my eyes as someone who does those things myself.

(He's in so much stress here, poor kid 😔)

Another aspect of autism that I'm surprised and kinda glad that Kieran exhibits as an autistic-coded character is meltdowns and shutdowns. Kieran has actual meltdowns in the game! This is something we have never seen in such an in-your-face way in any Pokémon game, and as someone who regularly has meltdowns myself, it hit me in the feels whenever I saw him having them. His first meltdown is in the Teal Mask when he steals the Teal Mask and runs off to Loyalty Plaza where he battles the player. He yells at Carmine and the player for treating him like an outcast...which is unfortunately something that happens to a lot of autistic people, myself included. Kieran screams at the player and Carmine for for lying to him while doing his stress stim, before running up to the Lousy Three's shrine and punching it, without any regard for his safety, which is also something autistic people may do during meltdowns...I know I have no regard for my safety during mine. After that's all over he gives the mask back to the player and goes home, leaving the player to talk to Carmine alone, who says that she's worried and thinks it's just "teen angst". When I saw that I was like, "...Uh, Carmine...I don't think it's just that, I think your brother is neurodivergent and really needs a lot of help and support because he's struggling a lot right now..."

His second meltdown is also in the Teal Mask, when he wants Ogerpon to go with him but Ogerpon wants to go with the player...Kieran can't process that and doesn't understand how to take Ogerpon's feelings into account, instead demanding the player to battle him for the right to be Ogerpon's partner. He collapses on all fours after being defeated again, and it gets worse...he looks like he's crying while the player battles Ogerpon in order to catch her. After the player catches her, Kieran wonders why he can't be like the player, and runs off crying, locking himself in his room for the rest of the story. The end of the Teal Mask has him doing his stress stim while being consumed by a new special interest in a very detrimental way...that interest being becoming so strong that no one can defeat him...including the player.

Kieran's third meltdown is in the Indigo Disk, after the player defeats him in the championship match. That meltdown is a full-on cutscene, where it is CLEAR to see his spiraling mental state through the visuals, and he holds his hands on his head like he has a headache while trying to process the fact that he lost to the player AGAIN (which is also relatable as someone who struggles with processing difficulties myself...it really does give headaches and it is one of the worst feelings when I just can't process what's going on around me or the emotions I feel or anything really)...he collapses to his knees and looks like he's breathing very hard as he is so upset and distressed at this loss. It is definitely one of the most heartbreaking scenes for me because this is a CLEAR CUT MELTDOWN in my eyes and it hits me in the feels like a TRUCK to watch that cutscene.

Also, in the Terapagos fight, Kieran has a bit of a shutdown for a bit, standing there frozen, thinking he's useless and can't do anything right (which is relatable as I have regular shutdowns as well, and I also constantly feel like I'm a failure of a human being who can't do anything right)...but let me tell you, when the player finally gets him to snap out of it and convinces him to help and he opens his eyes revealing that the light is back in his eyes as well as visible tears...I cheered (and teared up myself). My boy was back, and I was so happy.

(When I first saw the tears I was like, "NOOOO don't cry Kieran! 😢)

Also in the Indigo Disk, Kieran seems completely different and "no longer like his usual self". His autistic traits are (mostly) nowhere to be seen as he becomes much more serious, angry, assertive,and aggressive. I personally see this as a persona he puts on by masking, which is common for autistic people to do. I myself can't mask, but Kieran definitely seems to be masking here by putting on this persona in order to get stronger and seem stronger as a person as well. This is NOT his real self, this is a FACADE!

We see him start to drop the mask again in Area Zero when he says it seems like they're in a spy movie or something and how cool that is, but once the crack in his mask is pointed out he immediately puts it back on.

After everything in the under depths ends, and you go back to Blueberry Academy, he drops the mask again completely, and goes back to his real, adorkable, relatable self...and stays that way from then on, which made me so relieved and happy.

(This is my favorite cutscene in the entire DLC because of how adorable it is and also how neurodivergent Kieran is being here while apologizing for all he did 🥺)

In conclusion, I think Kieran is a great example of an autistic-coded character who has many relatable traits, and also does a good job showcasing some of the more "unpleasant and challenging behaviors and traits" (NTs use that terminology a lot, not me... that's how NTs unfortunately view NDs a lot of the time) of autism. I used to be afraid of him during the post-Teal Mask pre-Indigo Disk era but that was my trauma and PTSD talking (I talked about the emotional rollercoaster Kieran's story arc took me on in another post from last year after I finally worked up the courage to play the Indigo Disk...feel free to check that out too if you'd like). Now though I can wholeheartedly say that I love and appreciate Kieran a lot as a character, and his relatability is definitely a big part of why he is a big comfort character for me now (please Pokémon put him in Pokémon Masters EX, PLEASE I will literally cry from joy if he gets added to the game)!

Hope you all enjoyed this autistic person's analysis of yet ANOTHER autistic-coded character in Pokémon! I know I had A LOT to say but that just proves how relatable Kieran is, and I love him for that. Let me know what you think and if I missed anything in the comments below!

[luveline]

If you ever start requests up again (if you don't thats fine lol), I'd wonder how Miguel would be with an autistic (or any neurodivergent disability) reader? Thanks regardless for the great reads you've given!

hi!! i don't have autism so please forgive any inauthenticity, but i have a frame of reference in someone close to me so I hope this is somewhat like you wanted! if you ever want to request with specific traits, please do! ty for requesting

"This is the worst thing that could've happened," Miguel says, furious. 

You, sitting on the table by his workbench, glance away from your book reluctantly. Your lips part, confusion a line between your brows as you ask, "Are you making a joke?" 

"It's hyperbole. I'm exaggerating." 

"I thought so, but it's hard to tell. You said it very convincingly." 

"Sorry," he says, glaring down at his broken doohickey. Useless plastic, useless screwdriver useless Miguel. 

"Exaggerating… you're upset," you say. 

Miguel is both surprised and not. He doesn't always expect you to be able to read him. Your autism complicates how you recognise emotion, but you're caring, and now you've been told an effect (exaggeration) you can identify the cause (Miguel's broken device). 

"I'm frustrated," he tells you, leaning back in his chair. "I really thought this one would work." 

"I think the wrong thing all of the time," you say, sympathy creeping into your tone. Some might think you're unemotional, and the reality might be true for others, even yourself when you're with unfamiliar people, but it's not true in this instance. "Maybe I can help." 

Miguel scoots back his chair and you stand between his thighs, eyes roving over the fragments of his device, taking everything in. You love engineering —your involvement with the Arachno Humanoid Poly Multiverse had been, in your own words, the best thing that ever happened to you, as it dropped you head first into new technology, better technology than you ever saw on your Earth. You spend longer than you should bending over books about science undiscovered on your planet, your life a pressing of hydraulics, centrifuges, holographic projection, and magbelt machinery that Miguel loves to play. 

"It's badly soldered," you say. 

He winces. No punches held. "I used to be better." 

"You're bad now." 

You asked him a while back to let you know if you ever stepped on his toes, so to speak. Usually Miguel would leap to agitated disagreement, but you asked, and he likes you. He explains.

"Ah, that hurts my feelings," he says, without heat. "I know objectively that you're right, but people appreciate fluffing when it comes to observational critique." Miguel scoots his chair back as you turn to face him. "It's okay. I'm not mad." 

"You're patient," you say, nodding. "Sorry. Fluffing… how would you say it?" 

"I'd say, your soldering is a little iffy." 

"It's a lot iffy." 

"That's the fluffing. A white lie. No one's feelings get hurt and the problem is still identified." 

You nod more. "I'm a little better at soldering. I can fix it for you." 

"Nice," he says. 

He stands up and squeezes your shoulder gently. Your face dips to his hand and holds it there, cheek pressed to his knuckles, a smile turning the corners of your mouth up. Miguel isn't expecting it, but he doesn't rush you. 

"Can we spend time together after we fix it?" you ask.

"If we fix it." 

"I can fix it," you say happily, straightening your head and freeing his hand. "I'm much better at soldering than you." 

Miguel's a prideful person by instinct. He walks to the side of the workshop where he keeps the soldering iron and associated paraphernalia, throwing a quip over his shoulder, "You think you're better."

"I know I'm better," you say, sitting in his chair. "Sorry. I know a little that I'm better." 

He should say, Hey, we'll work on it, but Miguel doesn't want to. He likes you just as you are, accidental insults and all. 

[so-long-soldier-writes]

drabble #15 - attention to detail

kai parker x reader

summary: kai admires the way you watch tv

tags: tv watching, fangirl behavior, neurodivergent behavior (?)

word count: 1k

a/n: neurodivergent and/or fangirl reader; idk, this is something i do, idk if i'm crazy for it, or if people relate to it. lmk if i'm crazy. i just want my weird habits validated by kai, mmkay! 😅

Your finger hovers over the exit button on your screen as someone enters the room. Anxiety grows in your chest, but you try to not let it show. They circle around you, likely to join you on the couch, but hopefully not.

“Hey,” the person greets. You relax at the voice of Kai. Despite his reputation, you quite like the guy. He has his own demons, and is learning his way about the world, and while you have nothing in common otherwise, you kind of relate to him in that way. 

“Hi.”

You don’t see it, but he smiles at your response. Just the acknowledgement of his presence is nice to hear. Especially in the gentle, non-accusatory tone you use with him. “Whatcha watching?” He saw a glimpse when he passed behind the couch, but didn’t want to make you uncomfortable by lingering. 

“Oh, just this show I’ve been into for the last couple weeks,” you say, not wanting to reveal the title and give him an opportunity to poke fun. 

“Ah, the one you were watching yesterday? With the- with that actor you like?”

A small blush rises to your cheeks as you squeak out a “yes”, and Kai finds it absolutely adorable. 

“What season are you on?” He asks, no judgment about the show, nor the actor you like. A wave of confidence splashes over you. 

“Six, technically, but I’m rewatching season four before I watch anymore of six, because I’m not ready to process new information.” You chide yourself immediately. What a strange thing to say. And you were doing so well until then. 

Kai narrows his eyes, but then shrugs. “Okay.”

“Like, something big just happened in season six. They’ve already introduced the Big Bad, but the Big Bad in season five was so detrimental to the team - it killed a bunch of folks, and mentally scarred a whole bunch of others - that I’m not really ready to deal with another, so I’m rewatching a season where I know what happens, so that I already know who gets hurt, so it’s less painful to watch. Plus, rewatching episodes always helps me see things I miss the first time, which gives me a better understanding of the plot and the characters.”

Kai tries to not study you like a bug, but he’s fascinated by your explanation. The empathy you have for fictional characters is something he can’t help but admire, as is your desire to soak up every detail like a sponge. He wonders what it would be like to care so much that watching any further would genuinely hurt him. For the first time, he wishes he could love, so he could love like you do.

“Sorry,” you say after a moment of silence, “I just… infodumped on you. That was probably really confusing and weird.”

“No, not weird. It’s nice.” Kai tries to reassure you, but can’t find the words he needs you to hear. 

“I should probably just watch the season and have one big cry at the end like a normal person.”

“No, I think your way is better.”

“Wait, really? Most people tell me it’s just a tv show and to get over it.”

“Well, yeah, it’s a show, but it’s something you love, so who gives a fuck how you like to watch it? They’re not watching it with you; they’re not even in the room. I like the way you say you take the time to learn the characters and understand the plot. Y’know, someone put a lot of effort into that show you’re watching, and you’re enjoying it the way they’d want it to be enjoyed. Like it’s a piece of art in a museum, and you’re pointing out all the brush strokes and reading the plaque to understand the medium.” When you give him a confused glance, he smiles sheepishly. “I know a little about a lot of things. Went to a couple museums when I was stuck in 1994.” 

“Ah.”

“But my point is, coming from a sociopath, the empathy you have for the characters in your show is really cool. And I can understand the rewatching bit, too. I haven’t rewatched anything with the intensity that you have, but obviously, I could only watch anything made pre-1994, and to hell if I’m watching anything black and white, so I’ve seen some of the same movies once or twice, or more. Sometimes I get tired of rewatching the same stuff, but sometimes, I’ll also pick out a funny line I missed the first time, or a hand gesture that reveals a character knew something all along.”

You smile at him, grateful for his words and engagement in the conversation. You feel a little less childish about your own habits, especially knowing Kai’s not one to lie or hold back his true feelings about anything. For him to go as far to say he recognizes your empathy is a lot, and nothing you’d expect from the newly-reformed serial killer. 

“Thank you,” you blurt out, not wanting to leave him hanging.

“For what?”

“For not making me feel stupid about my interests.”

His eyes narrow. “Who makes you feel stupid?”

“A lot of people. Family… Damon.”

“Well Damon tries to make everyone feel stupid, and family sucks.”

You snort. “True.”

“If he says anything again, he can go through me.” Kai sends you a wink. 

“Okay,” you giggle in response. 

“Good.”

The man watches you for a minute longer. You press your spacebar to make the show play, and he takes note of the smile that spreads across your face as the characters fill the screen once more. He wants to ask to watch it with you, but doesn’t want to push just yet, so he doesn’t. He’s making progress, though, and gaining your trust. Hopefully soon, you’ll be less shy around him. 

And you think the same, feeling his eyes on you. Your trust isn’t something that’s easily given, but this isn’t the first time Kai’s made you feel comfortable, and you have a feeling it won’t be the last. He stays on the other end of the couch, but sticks to himself, and within a couple minutes, laughs quietly at something on his phone. The air between you is pleasant. His words run through your head once more, as the same scene plays for maybe the tenth time, but this time, you aren’t as worried about the people in the room as you watch.

[im-not-samantha-im-samanta]

Hello again, nonny!

Oh god, I'm so sorry how long this request took me to make.

I really wanted to make your request since you seem really sweet, but I struggled so much! I changed formats and ideas for your request at least 20 times and I'm so burnt out both creatively and in my personal life.

I'm not fully satisfied with my work, I feel like this piece could've been a bit better. But anyways I really hope you'll find the final results acceptable, and I'm again sorry for the way too long wait.

_

🍎🎶//Not such an awful colour after all...//🎶🍎

(Lilith and Lucifer x gender-neutral!imp!reader)

___________________________________________

Type: Fanfic

Settings: Romantic

Genre: Fluff, though a bit of hurt/comfort feel,

!TRIGGER WARNING!: Reader is hinted to be lonely and maybe a little depressed, hints of Reader having been mistreated in the past, occasional swear words used, idk if it's a trigger but Lucifer is a little awkward at interacting with gender-neutral reader at first (but he's supportive!), mentions of typical Hazbin Hotel stuff like hell, violence, etc., I believe the interaction between Lucifer and Lilith will give you second-hand embarrassment (but I imagine them being this lovey-dovey with each other, sorry), reader is also quite awkward and you'll probably also have second-hand embarrassment from this, and maybe a bit of not-sexual predator/prey feel in some parts is you squint (really not intended in a sexual way), and that should be all!

Sidenote: Reader is written as gender-neutral as per request. But if reader seems to be leaning towards more feminine sense, it's purely unintentional and I apologize!

Sidenote: Lucifer's portrayal is based off what we've seen in the show. As for Lilith, she's written as how the fandom's been portraying her before official release,

Sidenote: It's possible that reader might be a little neurodivergent coded. I just wrote what felt natural to me, and since I'm not a neurotypical, it might've affected Reader's portrayal,

_

That should be all,

Enjoy,

___________________________________________

Ah, those skies of red. Those sweet skies of red, they're all you've ever known.

Just those skies of red. And streets painted in blood, their shade makes you feel at home.

Skies of red, bloodied streets. As well as endless labyrinths bathing in the shade of ruby.

This is what makes up your entire world as a whole.

What makes up every twist, and every corner, even the littlest of crannies.

The colour of red - it seems to be an ever present companion.

A never leaving company, one that cannot be escaped no matter where you go.

Perhaps it is a punishment given to the sinners - to spend eternity in a sea of blood.

And only have a few distant memories of all the colours life holds.

A punishment to daily remind sinners of that one simple truth.

That just like the Pride ring is drained of colours, they themselves are drained of humanity.

At least, that's what's being passed on as the truth...

You yourself are not one of them, you're not a soul lost to sin and temptation.

And yet, you live the same exact way they do - in a single colour world.

Which is the only world you have ever known.

You may be an imp, sure.

You may have the upper hand over sinners, being able to travel outside Pride.

However, hell works just the same way the human world does.

At least in some ways.

Same as with humans, if you in hell don't have the means, the only travelling you can afford is taking out the trash.

And that's all. Nothing more, nothing less.

If we're bring honest here, you actually don't feel like you have the upper hand in this.

Especially considering the fact you're a lowly imp that can barely make a living.

If anything, you would say that sinners are the ones in the lead here.

Because they had experienced something you'd never have - a life outside of hell.

Before getting to hell, all sinners got to experience all the wonders of life.

Especially all those beautiful colours life could hold and come with - something you could only dream of.

You often wonder, though, just how it must feel to have everything you know taken away.

First having everything, and then ending up in a place that lacks most of what used to make up your whole world.

It's a pretty good punishment for sins if you think about it long and hard enough.

But you still don't think it's fair this punishment to see nothing but shades of red involves you too.

You never did anything wrong, and yet you live the same way sinners do.

And that's a fact you've still not accepted, and you probably never will.

The other imps in the Pride ring never seemed to be as bothered by this though.

They never really agreed with your desire of wanting more than just this.

Not even those that were the same as you - without the option to travel or move out of Pride.

Even your own parents always said that you were making this into too much of a big deal.

They didn't understand you, just like none of the other imps around you did.

That fact alone has always made you feel really singled out throughout your whole life.

You felt alone, and like no one really got you or your frustrations regarding living in a single colour world.

You felt like such an oddball - and the other imps didn't really help on that regard.

Most of them would point their fingers at you, and ridicule you.

You experienced that treatment especially when you were younger, still a naive little child.

Because back then you didn't know it was better to keep your mouth shut if your opinions didn't match what the rest thought.

You didn't know any better, but eventually, you've learned to keep such things to yourself.

You had to if you didn't want to continue being lonely and mistreated.

And so, you've pushed your distaste for the colour of red aside, never mentioning it ever again.

Or well, that's how it was until a really unusual and extraordinary day.

On one certain day, a beautiful, vividly turquoise rose was found in Pride.

And it was such an unusual sight that the petite little flower was taken and placed into a museum.

Yet, no one really seemed to care for that small little bloom.

No one really rushed to the museum building to see that little piece of miracle.

No one was excited about it.

No one except you.

It sure felt lonely all over again to be the only one there.

The only one standing in front of the flower secured behind the protective glass.

The only one eagerly wanting to take in every little detail of the flower with true and genuine enthusiasm.

But at the moment you finally got to live your childhood dreams, it didn't really matter.

It was not your loss, it was your gain.

And so, you stood there, gazing fondly at the petite bloom.

And as you did so, you eventually found yourself talking to the flower gently.

"Aren't you just the prettiest little thing all of hell's ever seen?".

You melted over the little miracle as if it could hear.

You spoke to it, letting those turquoise petals know just how much you admired them.

And you could've cared less about whether or not you looked silly.

This was a dream come true - and you've made sure that the little thing knew.

"You have no idea how much I've been wishing for something like you to happen here in hell...".

You found yourself confessing, telling the flower all you've kept inside for years and years.

All of what you've had to push aside and share with no one until this single moment.

And it felt amazing to finally let it all out after suppressing it all for so long.

Even if that small thing probably couldn't even hear or understand any of what you've shared.

Even if all you got in response was just and only deafening silence.

Silence that reminded you that you're the only one around.

The only one to have these certain thoughts regarding your hatred for the colour of red.

And your frustrations about your desires to see more of the colours life can hold.

You really were all alone on this one it seemed...

"Truly a sight to see, am I right?".

A voice broke you out of your thoughts.

And you then found yourself facing a stranger.

An ordinary height man - one with porcelain skin and golden locks for hair.

And two vividly yellow pools for eyes, with their centers of blood red.

Blood red - that one damn, awful shade that you held so much hatred for.

And yet, despite that, you had to admit that the man was quite the looker.

And he definitely knew how to dress - all fancy, and, dare you'd say, flawless.

Well, flawless if you ignored the presence of the colour red in his attire.

But nonetheless, he was truly something you could stare at for hours and not get bored.

And it was quite the surprise that such a man would approach someone like you.

A lowly imp - a creature beneath nearly all of hell kind.

"I wasn't talking about myself, you know?".

The man's voice brought you out of your thoughts for the second time today.

And as his teasing words settled in, you realize that you've been caught staring at him!

A blush immediately covered your face at that realization.

And you profoundly attempted to apologize, stumbling over your words as you did.

The stranger, however, didn't seem all too bothered, nor did he seem disgusted.

If anything, he looked amused, and the warm chuckle he gave reassured you about that assumption.

"Oh, it's nothing to get worked up over,".

The man silenced you gently, waving his hand dismissively.

"I am aware of the effect I have on women, men...".

He went on casually before pausing, and looking you up and down.

"As well as pretty little things such as yourself...".

He grinned at you seductively, but then you could almost see the gears turning in his head.

And as his eyes widened at what seemed to be a realization, his face shifted to a look of panic.

"Sorry- am I allowed to call you a thing? That's not offensive, is it?".

He questioned, making your embarrassment ease up.

He seemed as socially awkward as you at that certain moment.

And you couldn't help but smile as he sputtered some more.

"Fuck- sorry, would it be more acceptable to call you a pretty little person?".

The stranger asked, looking genuinely panicked about the situation.

But before you could reassure him, he went on a tangent.

"Wait- that's probably-".

He sputtered, stumbling over his words without catching a break.

It would be quite a comical sight to see - Him, a gorgeous demon - stressing over possibly having insulted a mere imp.

And to the point of nearly crumbling and begging for forgiveness too.

Truly a scene one doesn't get to see on the daily basis.

You might've even laughed at him if only you didn't feel quite bad for him.

He was obviously a decent person and meant well.

Which was not something you see in hell everyday either.

"Sorry! I've not romanced a gender nonconfirming individual before,".

The man chuckled awkwardly, nervously reaching out with his hand to fix his hat.

But then he almost seemed to choke back on his own chuckle before he, as if in a rush, added:

"-but I'm not actually trying to romance you! I'm just-".

He didn't get to finish his ramblings as you've decided to finally ease his nerves.

"It's all good, no worries,".

You gently cut the stranger off with a friendly chuckle.

And you even offered a soft smile to add to your reassurance.

You genuinely didn't want for this man to stress himself out - he seemed quite sweet.

"You did pretty well for your first time,".

You added in a light-hearted voice, feeling the need to relax the man further.

And to your words, the stranger responded with a surprised blink of his eyes, and his mouth going agape.

But that reaction was short lived as he soon grinned, looking pretty proud of himself.

"I did?".

Was the following verbal answer your reassurance received.

And being the good-natured person you were, you nodded in confirmation.

You didn't get annoyed with him, you actually enjoyed this interaction a lot.

It was like a breath of fresh air to finally talk to someone real.

And someone who was friendly and not a mean-spirited bitch at that!

"Wow, that's... That's a huge relief!".

The stranger chuckled again, but this time it was less awkward, and more warm and relaxed.

"It sure wouldn't do my reputation any good if I were to insult one of my subjects,".

He mused casually while tugging a little at his coat and fixing it to his liking.

"even if by complete accident,".

He added, but then his previous words sunk in, and you had to do a double take.

What did he mean by 'subjects'?

"Um... subjects?".

You voiced your thoughts and confusion, to which the man, still grinning, raised an eyebrow.

"Well, yeah?".

The stranger said with a voice tone that hinted it should be obvious, as if there was no place for confusion.

But you only stared at the man, clearly not getting the memo.

Yet, the man didn't seem offended, he actually seemed more amused than anything.

"Wait, you actually-?".

He broke put into a short, yet hearty laugh as he gripped onto his hat.

He laughed, but he didn't seem to be ridiculing you or have any ill will.

He just seemed to find the whole situation entertaining.

"My- oh, my!".

The stranger's laughter died down, only a few low chuckles leaving him as he uttered those words.

"Now that's something I don't see every day! You don't really do politics, do you?".

He asked you with a playful smirk, his sharp teeth peeking out from under his upper lip.

And you answered with a shake of your head, confirming the man's suspicions.

"Ah, that explains it,".

The stranger mused as he casually leaned onto his cane in the shape of an apple.

"Well, fortunately for you,".

The man began after a short pause, his eyes half-lidded and relaxed.

With a laid-back grin to complete the look.

"I'm not really one of those stuck-up royals who quite literally lose their shit over people not recognizing them,".

He gave a warm chuckle, along with a look of the same warmth as his laugh.

Like sweet honey stirred into a warm cup of tea.

Then, the stranger with the eyes of ruby put his free hand on his hip.

And he casually crossed his legs, all while still leaning against his cane.

He made his pose look so easy, and completely effortless. Like he had no weight the cane needed to support.

It was quite impressive.

And you wondered whether the man really weighed close to nothing.

Or if it was some sleight of hand kinda deal used to gain admiration from others.

Well, whichever case it were, the cane was perfectly still and straight.

As if the handsome demon wasn't even leaning on it.

"Yeah, that's not really my style,".

You heard the male say, drawing your attention back to him instead of the spear-like cane.

And you looked at the male just in time, because you got to see him casually checking his nails at the end of his statement.

Or well, you got to see him looking at where his nails would be as the stranger had black gloves on, giving no access to his nails.

But still, the gesture got the point across.

You understood the action was to deliver his words in a more smug and careless fashion.

Like he saw himself as above the rest of the popular demons.

And maybe as if he looked down on the others.

Not others as in low class.

Others as in the other royals, those who felt insulted if one didn't recognize them.

But that's beside the point.

What mattered more than how he said it, was the context of what he said.

Because the message that sunk in was clear - this man was a high class it seemed.

"Oh... so, you're a royal...?".

You found yourself saying in a way that made it seem like you were asking.

Like you weren't just repeating what was said to you, but like you wanted to hear a confirmation.

But despite that though, the voice tone you spike in wasn't really impressed nor intimidated.

Unlike what would've been expected of you upon such a find.

But your reaction was genuine, contrary to what one might think.

You truly weren't really impressed or intimidated by the revelation - you didn't find any reason to be.

One could call you naive, but you didn't feel the need to cower or be in awe.

Because this handsome demon didn't seem to want that sort of thing.

At least, that's what you assumed based on your interaction so far.

For the demon acted like a normal and ordinary demon, an equal to you even.

And not just that - he's been sweet and considerate the entire time too!

Not to mention you never got just why were royals such a big deal.

So, your disinterest in the man's status was your genuine reaction, it was no act.

"Sure am,"

The stranger nodded in agreement with your words, a low grin decorating his flawless face.

And you couldn't help but feel this laid-back aura coming off him, he seemed like he had little to no care in the world.

And he gazed at you with soft eyes that welcomed you in despite how much you despised their colour.

Oh, and the way he looked at you...

It made you feel like he wasn't bothered by your lack of reaction or lack of appeal for the fact he was a hight class.

It actually felt like he appreciated it. And his next words seemed like a confirmation of that.

"but, you don't have to worry your pretty little head about it,"

He waved his hand dismissively before addressing you with a:

"my dear little any-colour-but-red enthusiast.".

And the way he's addressed you made you pause.

And as your eyes widened, you had to do a double take.

You needed to let the title he's given you fully sink in.

And oh, when it did, your entire being filled shame and embarrassment.

Because if you got it right, then the man's heard your one-sided chat with the flower!

That one embarrassing heart to heart conversation no one was supposed to hear...

"Wait-".

You muttered, feeling your face beginning to heat up.

"you... you heard me...?".

You asked, and you couldn't even say anything more.

You were so embarrassed!

If one could die from shame, you'd be found dead right on your spot at least twice.

And yet, a part of you still hoped the male wouldn't confirm your worries.

A part of you still believed the situation wasn't so bad.

But then all your hopes were shattered.

"Mhm, I sure did,"

The handsome stranger confirmed much to your dismay.

And you were internally screeching.

You were caught sharing your frustrations with a petite bloom.

Talk about awkward.

You were surprised the stranger didn't run from you.

Fuck, this embarrassing moment was gonna stay on your mind til you die.

Even on your death bed this moment would be in your head on repeat.

"Oh my fucking-".

You sputtered and buried your face into your hands.

And you couldn't stop the involuntary, annoyed groan at the situation.

"I... damn... I'm sorry you had to see that...".

You eventually managed to tell the stranger after getting the courage to face him again.

"I would swear to you thar I'm not as odd as I may look right now,"

You went on, despite not knowing why exactly.

You felt the need to explain yourself, make yourself look better.

But you couldn't really.

"but I, unfortunately, do shit like that pretty often,"

Followed your confession.

Being true was the key, right?

Maybe it'd help in your case? You didn't count on

it.

And yet, the friendly demon surprised you.

"That's quite alright,"

You heard him chuckle.

And just like you previously reassured him, now he was to reassure you.

"if anything, I think you're quite endearing.".

He reassured you, voice warm and sweet, just like his eyes and the look he was giving you were.

And you did feel a bit calmer after his words for sure, although you still couldn't get over the fact this man's heard everything.

After all, what you told the flower wasn't something you'd tell just anyone. Let alone to someone you didn't know at all.

But then, the male spoke up again.

"And, between you and me...".

He started, looking into your eyes.

And then, he said those words you've always wanted to hear.

"I agree with you, hell could use more colour.".

There it was. Those words no one's ever told you. Those words you've always craved to hear.

Someone was agreeing with you and sharing your frustrations.

It felt like a dream.

You needed to pinch yourself, just to be sure this was real.

Your ears weren't deceiving you, were they?

"You... you really think so?".

You asked the stranger, your voice low, words cautious.

You didn't want to risk anything.

Your thoughts were racing, you were all tense, and you almost held back your breath as you waited for the man's response.

The male was quiet for a bit, prolonging your nervousness.

But it didn't seem like it was deliberately to make you suffer.

Since his expression softened - his grin was less wide, less smug.

And his eyes held something in them that was hard to read.

It seemed like recognition or compassion...

And maybe if one looked close enough, they would see a hint of sadness and longing.

As if, long time ago, the man's lost something he cherished dearly.

You've never seen anyone look like that.

And maybe this was why you felt the stranger's words were true.

That he was sick of living in a world made of shades of red just like you were.

"Yes, I do,".

He nodded, melancholia taking over the demon's features.

"Losing the opportunity to witness all the colours life can carry is something I mourn over from time to time...".

He confessed to you as he stood straight again, hus stance no longer relaxed, and he gazed longingly at the turquoise rose.

"You know, when I'm in a certain mood...".

He added with a bit lighter tone and a soft smile sent your way.

As if he was trying to make his words seem more light-hearted and not bring the mood down.

His words made a few questions arise in your head.

He confessed to have known a world filled with colours, which would hint at him being a sinner.

But then again, he said he was a royal, so he couldn't be a sinner.

It was confusing, and you had several questions, but you didn't have it in you to ask.

Instead you remained silent, gaze fixating on those turquoise petals.

Yet, you didn't leave the stranger without a reaction.

It may have been daring, maybe even improper, to do this to a royal, but you felt it was the right thing to do.

And so, you gently placed a consoling hand on the man's arm.

And when the male looked at you with a surprised look, you offered a soft smile and eyes full of compassion.

A look to let him know he wasn't alone in this.

And that gesture seemed to mean a lot to the demon as he offered a light smile back, his eyes seeming more lively after your act.

And you two exchanged a gaze of understanding one another, both of you feeling seen.

And then, the two of you gazed back at the turquoise rose, both of you admiring it in silence.

But this time neither of you were alone. This time you both had someone there with you. Someone to share this special moment with.

This was a moment that meant more than any personal possessions - this moment meant everything.

Yet, getting to have everything at one moment doesn't necessarily mean you'll get to keep that everything.

Such moments were a matter of a few minutes, not a lifetime.

And the reminder of this simple truth, came in a form of a voice.

A female voice that awoke a sense of familiarity in you.

Yet, you could not remember where you've heard that voice before.

And and picturing the owner has proven to be even more hard - it was out of the question.

"Ah, there you are!".

A female voice rang through the empty museum halls.

The sound it carried was smooth and feminine, with elegance.

And it evoked a cozy feeling, if that even makes sense.

There was also this slight raspy quality to it, yet the voice was sweet.

Pleasant to the ears.

You and the handsome stranger both turned around.

And the sight you were met with - oh how to even describe it?

You almost found yourself doubting that you were still standing in hell.

Because you could've sworn you were literally seeing an angel.

The woman that approached was like a divine painting.

Her figure was well-endowed, with long and thin legs.

And her face was sharp and flawless, looking as if made up by angels.

As if to add to her beauty - she had blonde long hair.

And that hair draped over her body all the way to the floor.

Like a veil made of gold.

She truly looked like a being straight out of heaven.

And you would dare to say that she rivaled all the depictions of Eve you've heard of.

Though there was one thing ruining the divine image of hers.

And those were her horns.

Wine red, long and curled horns decorating her head.

"Lili!".

The blond male next to you perked up.

He eagerly waved the woman over, a wide smile on his face.

His sharp teeth exposed.

His entire person appeared to have completely livened up.

Contrary to how solemn he was with you just a few moments back.

"My one and only! Where have you been?".

He asked the woman.

Or well, Lili - as he's addressed her.

And he gazed at her with pure adoration, excitement written all over his face.

And the demon stepped forward with a fond look.

"I could've sworn you were by my side the whole time before- poof- and you were gone!".

The handsome demon went on.

His pace of speech was fast and energized.

And he was almost jumbling his words together in the process.

And with his gesticulation coming on strong, the male had a truly disorganized look to him.

He looked as if his thoughts and emotions were all over the place.

As if they were going millions of miles per second.

It was quite a wholesome sight to see.

The previously seemingly well-composed man turning into a little ball of energy?

Just because he laid his eyes on the much taller demoness?

That was a truly cute and wholesome moment, a heartwarming moment even, if you'd dare to say.

"But that's not what happened, Luci."

The demoness responded to the shorter demon.

Or well, Luci, if we're going by how he was addressed.

And the female chuckled warmly.

She didn't seem bothered by the male's antics.

Instead, they seemed to be something she adored and held dear.

And the look in her lilac eyes held nothing but devotion.

Matching the one in the red eyes of 'Luci'.

Then, at her response, the male demon looked confused.

"It's not?".

He questioned, to which 'Lili' shook her head, chuckling again.

And then came the following answer:

"No, not quite. It was actually you who wandered off.".

'Luci' seemed taken aback by the reply,.

And pointing to himself as he questioned further:

"Me?".

'Lili' then nodded softly.

The fond look never leaving her face.

"Are you- are you sure? I don't remember it happening like that...".

The blond male then mused, his brows furrowing.

And gripping his chin in thought, he puckered up his lips.

He seemed genuinely confused about the whole thing.

Which made him look quite silly.

Though you yourself, personally, found the look quite cute.

And 'Lili' probably shared your view on that matter.

Because she chuckled melodiously.

Which was a truly heavenly sound to your ears.

And as she did, she seemed to almost melt over the male.

"And how do you remember it, dear?".

She questioned, and her lilac eyes held a comforting feeling.

Like that one of summer evening.

When it's getting dark and everything is cooling down.

Getting to breathe and rest.

With a campfire nearby, a good chilly drink in hand.

And the sound of crickets in the background.

A warm, yet still cooling feeling.

"Well, first we were holding hands..."

'Luci' began to explain to his female companion.

And as if on cue, his strong gesticulation began anew.

And with that, he followed through with:

"Then we stopped by those Lust jewels - y'know, those Asmodeus used to wear before eventually donating them here,".

Then he paused for a moment.

He seemed to be trying to remember the rest of the details.

"Then, I noticed the signs about the new expositions...".

He added after a moment of silence.

A pause, and then eyes seemed to sparkle.

Almost as if he's made some sort of accomplishment.

He most likely managed to remember more details of what's happened.

At least, that's what you've guessed.

"Oh, yeah!".

The handsome male chirped eagerly.

And he almost jumped on his spot as he went ahead to fill in the rest of what's happened.

At least according to him:

"And then I go: Look, Lili! The sign here says the turquoise rose is on the upper floor! Come!".

He said, imitating, what you assumed, were his previous actions and words.

"And I rushed upstairs while leaving you by the Lust jewels.".

The demon finished casually as he smiled.

He seemed so proud of himself for remembering everything.

But then, his yellow eyes widened, everything apparently sinking in.

"Oohh, yeah... It really was me who wandered off,".

He muttered as an embarrassed and disappointed look took over his features.

"You were right, yeah...".

'Luci' admitted, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly all while 'Lili' had a knowing look.

It was that smug 'I told you so' look, but without the ill-will in it.

Instead the look held a playful feel.

A playful feel like that of a simple lovey-dovey banter.

A lovey-dovey banter with no hard feelings.

"Oh, Lili- my love!".

The handsome male called dramatically.

And he took ahold of the taller demoness' hands, squeezing them.

"I have committed such shameful act! Can you ever forgive me, my queen?".

He asked in such a over exaggerated, over dramatic voice.

And he looked a few seconds away from dropping to his knees.

Possibly to loudly and unnecessarily plead for forgiveness.

But that wasn't all yet, because 'Luci' added to the scene.

'Luci' began planting soft kisses onto the female's hands.

Yeah, that wasn't really a scene you'd care to watch.

Talk about uncomfortable.

You just had to look away from the two.

And not only was the scene unpleasant to witness.

But you also didn't want to be seen as some kind of perverted freak.

Like, being caught watching this sort of scene?

Yeah, that wasn't on your bucket list.

And so, you directed your focus back on the turquoise rose.

You wanted to give the two the privacy they probably should have.

And surprisingly, it wasn't as hard to tune the two out.

If you focused on the little bloom hard enough, that is.

You were only brought back to the conversation when you heard yourself being mentioned.

"And who's your friend, Lulu?".

The blonde female asked as her gaze met yours.

Her lilac eyes flashed red for a moment and the shade made you really uncomfortable.

It made you want to shrink, if not straight up run away.

And it was hard to tell if you felt that way because of how much you hated the colour red.

Or if it was because the woman's gaze was suddenly so strict and intimidating.

She seemed to be sizing you up, analyzing, judging...

But before you could muster up the courage to introduce yourself, 'Luci' did it for you.

Or well, he attempted to do so.

"Oh! That! That's...".

He eagerly attempted to introduce you.

Motioning to you with his hand as he grinned wide.

But when the blond male realized he actually didn't know your name, he let his hand drop back to his side.

And he chuckled awkwardly.

"I actually have no idea!".

He chuckled awkwardly, making you feel somewhat more nervous.

The way 'Lili' studied you left you quite uneasy and all tense, you were a little panicked.

Because suddenly a thought came to your head.

What if the woman could see you as some sort of homewrecker?

As someone trying to get with the male she so obviously dated?

That thought caused a tight feeling in your chest.

You found it hard to breathe.

And 'Luci' wasn't making it much better, despite not having any ill intent.

At least you hope he didn't.

"I guess we just got a little lost in our conversation,".

The male said.

He sounded much more casual with this statement.

And he fixed his hat a little.

"Isn't that right, my any-colour-but-red enthusiast?".

'Luci' addressed you with a grin.

Pulling you into the conversation without giving you any time to prepare.

Yeah, he wasn't making this situation any easier to handle.

And not having expected to be involved in the chat, your mind went all blank.

You had not anticipated that.

You were not prepared for this scenario.

So, the only reaction you could come up with was an awkward smile.

An awkward smile and a quick nod sent towards the tall female.

You really hoped that if 'Lili' was reading between the lines, she'd see it really was just an innocent interaction.

An innocent interaction and nothing more.

"Ah, I see... how sweet".

'Lili' hummed.

Unbothered, unphased - that's how you'd describe her.

She seemed so well-composed and proper in every way.

Even all of her movements were just so elegant and correct.

If that makes sense.

Natural - that's another words you'd use for the female.

All her responses seemed just so natural and right.

Especially compared to you.

Yeah, nothing about her said 'socially awkward', unlike how it was in your case.

And, as if that wasn't enough - she was also truly hard to read.

You couldn't tell what she was thinking, she was unpredictable.

She could be planning on tearing you apart and you'd never be able to tell!

And that made the demoness so much more intimidating to you.

Especially considering you had a feeling that, unlike you, she could read you perfectly.

That, or she could be potentially misreading you - that would definitely make things worse.

"And I take it your little chat must've been quite entertaining if you've managed to hold my dear husband's attention for so long,"

The blonde's lilac gaze bore into yours once again.

Her long eyelashes gave her eyes a thin and sharp look.

They were like two black, massive folded fans.

You couldn't tell if they were natural lashes or false ones.

Anyways, her words were followed by a smirk - one that made you feel unsafe.

Predatory, dangerous - that was the air her smirk carried.

And you felt like you were about to fall prey to the demoness.

Like you were going to meet the same fate a little mouse meets at the claws of a cat.

Even the female's pupils seemed to be cat-like slits, as if to only add to that feeling.

And you were so sure that 'Lili' would've pounced on you.

If only 'Luci' didn't chime in.

"Hey! My attention span isn't so bad!".

The male demon called, hands on his hips as he looked quite offended.

Yet, he smiled playfully afterwards.

So, it was safe to assume that he wasn't truly as insulted as it may have seemed.

And another argument for that claim would be the man's next actions.

For his body took a much more relaxed stance, and he added:

"But yeah, yeah, it was a good chat,".

And he then simply fixed his hat a little as it previously nearly slipped off his head when he so intensely perked up at his wife's little jab at his person.

But shortly just after fixing his hat, the demon perked up again.

Almost sending his hat flying off his head once more.

"because-".

'Luci' jumped up.

He seemed to have recalled the exact context of the chat he had with you a few moments ago.

And suddenly, he no longer looked relaxed or casual.

Instead, in an blink of an eye, his calm demeanor switched up for a much more energetic one.

He acted like a little ball of energy once again.

"you won't believe it, Lili- but this little imp actually shares our passion!".

The blond male said with a wide grin.

And he started gesticulating strongly again.

Almost as if he was practitioning pantomime.

He seemed just so eager to share this with his female companion.

And he spoke so fast and excitedly that he almost struggled to breathe.

But after a long and deep breath, 'Luci' managed to sputter out the rest:

"They also think hell could use more colours! Isn't that- isn't that awesome, Lili??".

And at the mention of your desire to see more colours in hell 'Lili's eyes seemed to spark with interest.

"Oh, you don't say.".

She mused.

Her thin fingers grazed her face for a second, her eyebrows raising up a little.

And her expression softened.

Then, another light smirk appeared on her face.

But imposing isn't a word you'd call that smirk she wore.

This certain smirk was different than the previous ones.

This one seemed much safer, and almost friendly.

And 'Lili' had something more lively about her as she said:

"Well then, it seems we'll get along just perfect,".

And with those words, the blonde demoness took a step towards you.

"May I ask for your name? I'm sure that'd be much preferable than being referred to as any-colour-but-red enthusiast.".

The female told you with a short, yet warm chuckle.

And a hand casually rested on her curvy side.

Most of the intimidating demeanor she previously had seemed gone.

She seemed to have eased up.

Which gave her a more approachable feel.

And thanks to that, you yourself felt much more at ease being in the woman's presence.

So, it wasn't as difficult to muster up the courage to speak as it was before.

"Oh- y-yeah... I'd much rather be called by my name, yeah, that'd be much better, totally,".

You chuckled awkwardly.

And nodding your head with a light smile, you rubbed at the back of your neck.

You were rambling a little too.

You still felt a bit of unease.

But that was to be expected.

Considering you've not had this much of genuine social interaction in years.

But, 'Lili' didn't seem to mind.

She just looked at you with almost a motherly, compassionate look.

And she waited for you to introduce yourself with patience.

"Oh- damn- I'm rambling again, sorry,".

You said nervously after a short pause when you were processing your own actions.

And you almost started rambling anew before you caught yourself going that direction.

And you stopped yourself.

You needed to compose yourself.

You didn't want to drive her away by your social incompetence.

"Ahem, anyways, yeah, my name... I'm (Y/N),".

You finally introduced yourself.

And proud of your accomplishment, your inner self did a little victory dance.

Then, remembering how social interactions work, you added in:

"It's really a pleasure to meet you.".

You nodded with a smile before perking up and quickly saying:

"Ah- erm- both of you,".

And you sent a timid smile towards 'Luci', wanting to acknowledge him as well.

You didn't want for him to feel left out.

Your gesture seemed to be appreciated as the blond male smiled right back.

But instead of 'Luci' speaking up, it was his wife to follow though with the conversation.

"It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance as well.".

'Lili's voice pulled your gaze right back at her figure.

And your full focus was on her once again.

"Truly it is, (Y/N).".

The demoness added in, nodding her head as if to confirm her statement.

After that, another smile formed on her lips, and she had this slightly amused look to her.

"Now, normally I would suppose that there's no introduction needed on our part,".

She mused, a hand resting on her chest while she leaned over a little, towering over you.

Her tall frame casted a bit of a shadow over you, making you feel much smaller than you actually were.

And she got so close that you could smell her expensive perfume.

But that was the least thing you needed to focus on.

You needed to listen to her words - which you forced yourself to do.

"but judging by this entire interaction, I would say you have absolutely no idea who we are,".

You heard 'Lili' say as your focus was back on the context of her words.

And her entire person was once again imposing as she finished her sentence.

She was wearing a light, entertained grin - one that exposed her pearly white fangs.

And despite her grin being quite pronounced, it did not take off her elegance.

If anything, it only made her more heavenly gorgeous.

And showing those pointed teeth some more, she asked:

"Am I correct in that assumption?".

With that question, she raised an eyebrow.

Her expression wasn't confused as one might have assumed, though.

No, the demoness seemed to already know your answer.

And that knowing look she wore only further confirmed that claim.

Perhaps you were right when you assumed 'Lili' could easily read you.

That realization alone made your eyes widen, and you sputtered:

"Oh- y-yeah- that would be right.".

You nodded your head with an awkward smile, feeling both nervous and embarrassed.

And your nervousness was, of course, affecting you, as you rambled a little just like you previously did:

"Yeah, I have no idea who you two are... I don't do politics and famous people... buuuut, you're... probably someone... important...?".

At your guess, both 'Lili' and 'Luci' chuckled, and they exchanged a glance.

"Oh dear, you have no idea,".

The blonde demoness stated as another soft chuckle left her lips.

Then she covered her lips with her fingers for a few seconds, looking amused.

And the way 'Lili' and 'Luci' were gazing at you left you unable to do anything other than smile awkwardly.

Their gazes were hard to describe, but you felt preyed upon.

Just like you previously felt with the women at the start.

Except it felt a bit different in a way you couldn't quite describe.

Not to mention that this time 'Luci' was a part of it.

The male demon's even gotten closer to you just like his wife did a while ago.

"They're precious, aren't they, Lili?".

'Luci' suggested as he stepped forward.

His gaze was focused on you, and he was giving a sharp toothed grin.

A grin that called for you - begged you - to read between the lines.

But that could be just your imp nature speaking, right?

After all, imps were used to being the prey to other demons.

So it made sense for you to be alert around other demon species, right?

Well, even then, the answer 'Lili' gave to 'Luci's question didn't help you feel safer.

"Quite so, Luci,".

'Lili' mused as her gaze trailed over your whole person.

She was looking you up and down with predatory eyes - like a snake looking at a little mouse.

Her gaze was unnerving, and the female didn't seem to bother with doing that action subtly either.

As if she felt no shame in doing so.

Almost as if she wanted for you to be aware of what she was doing.

And as if that wasn't alarming enough, 'Lili's gaze then trailed off towards 'Luci'.

The two looked at each other, exchanging a certain gaze.

You couldn't tell what kind of gaze it was exactly, but it made you feel so much more preyed upon.

It appeared as if the two were wordlessly agreeing on something, plotting even.

And you didn't like that one bit.

But before you could even think to perhaps run off, the couple directed their attention back at you.

"Well, dear (Y/N)... It seems an introduction is in order,".

'Lili' then told you in a smooth voice as she once agai leaned over you in one elegant movement.

Meanwhile 'Luci' stood aside, watching the further interaction with an eager grin.

"Allow me to introduce myself, my name is Lilith,".

The blonde demoness introduced herself, a hand on her chest.

Then, she motioned to the male beside her with her hand.

And the demon in question stepped forward, placing his hand into the female's palm.

"And this is my husband, Lucifer.".

Lilith introduced the male, making you pause.

You needed a moment to do a quick double take on that information.

But before you could even questioned anything, the mentioned male spoke:

"Lucifer Morningstar. It's a pleasure to officially meet you, (Y/N).".

And with those words, the world suddenly seemed to stop and freeze in time.

Your mouth and throat went completely dry, and your pulse seemed to halt.

The room seemed to begin to spin, your body breaking into cold sweat.

And all you could hear was loud and painful ringing in your ears.

This couldn't be real.

"W-wait...".

You attempted to speak, your eyes wide.

You wanted to say something - anything!

But your brain seemed to have crashed and gone blank.

You were unable to formulate a single simple sentence.

You were at loss for words.

And at loss for breath too it seemed.

Your throat was all closed up, and all you could give was a pathetic little gasp for air.

"Oh? Oh? What is it, dear?"

Lucifer looked entertained - and it was the same for Lilith.

The pair watched you do a bit of your mental gymnastics with amused gazes.

Both were grinning.

Seemingly finding some kind of joy in you finally realizing just who you were dealing with.

"Do those names... I don't know... maybe ring a bell?".

Lucifer asked you in a sweet and seemingly well-meaning, yet still condescending voice.

He sounded playful, as if this was just some kind of a game.

But when the demon got no response from you, he grinned wide and turned to his wife:

"Why, Lili, I have a feeling those names do ring a bell to them,".

And Lilith, seemingly equally as amused, nodded along:

"Yes, it certainly seems like it, Lulu,".

You had absolutely no idea as to what to do in this situation.

Your brain was way too overloaded to figure out a possible solution for this.

Thinking was out of the question, so was talking yourself out of this situation.

You were so fucked.

And so, acting on default, you dropped to your knees, hands in a praying position, attempting to ask for forgiveness.

You didn't dare look at the two, your eyes being directed to the ground as your entire body trembled.

And you pitifully tried to verbally ask for forgiveness of the pair too.

But all you could force out were just pathetic little noises and sputters of nonsense.

"Now, that's quite a bit of an extreme reaction, don't you think?".

Lucifer mused all so casually, sounding unbothered by the display.

And Lilith matched the casual, unphased voice tone, saying:

"Come now, get off the floor, dear. The ground is way too dirty for you to be sprawling all over it like that,".

After that, Lucifer chimed in again, following through with:

"Yeah, and you might want to wipe off those tears as well, they're a bit too dramatic,".

Their words and reaction confused you so, and made you pause.

You didn't know what was going on - you've not expected this.

They were supposed to tear you apart, weren't they?

Because you didn't recognize them and talked to them so casually, right?

Well, not even Lucifer's next words made that any clearer.

In fact, you actually ended up feeling even more confused then.

"And I gotta ask: is your memory not working well?".

Lucifer asked, and a hint of disappointment lingered in the air.

You didn't understand his words, or his voice tone.

Both only made more questions arise.

And you cautiously looked up to him,

"wha- what?".

You muttered, voice barely loud enough to be heard.

You felt almost afraid to question what Lucifer's said.

You just can't help yourself but be fearful of the male.

Even if he's been nothing but pleasant to you the whole time.

But, could anyone even really blame you for your unease and fear?

He was the literal Devil, and you've treated him like an equal.

There was no way that Lucifer wasn't insulted or upset over this.

"I mean, I told you I'm not one of those royals who lose it if one doesn't recognize them, no?".

Well, it turned out your assumptions were all wrong.

These words that Lucifer's said have proven you wrong.

He didn't seem upset whatsoever, and his words confirmed that.

Sure, he sounded just a little disappointed with you in a way.

But he was not upset, which definitely was a relief.

However, you still had yet to properly calm down and relax.

"Y-yeah... you did...".

Was all you've managed to clumsily force out.

And your voice tone sounded just a little surprised.

That was because you've experienced a bit of a realization.

Truth be told, you've completely forgotten about your previous conversation.

You've forgotten just what kind of a royal Lucifer told you he was.

And when you remembered the male's previous words, your eyes widened a little.

Yet, your mind didn't feel any clearer, you still felt the same.

So, saying anything more was a task you could not achieve.

But, the devil went on with the conversation anyways.

"Then what's up with that reaction?".

He questioned you, an eyebrow raised.

He sounded almost judgemental at that certain moment.

He even looked the part - an unimpressed gaze, a hand on his hip.

Yet, somehow, there was still no feeling of ill-will to him.

Still, it wasn't any easier for you to think of what to say.

"I- I... well... y-you see...".

You clumsily attempted to explain yourself.

But a weak little mutter was all that you could give.

You couldn't say anything more, your brain felt too empty.

Everything that's happened just left you with a clouded mind.

And your thoughts and emotions were all over the place.

So, a soft mutter and a distressed whimper was the best you could do.

But Lucifer didn't seem to mind that, not even in the slightest.

"Nah, I'm just pulling your leg!".

He called with a hearty chuckle.

And he dismissively waved his hand as he added:

"I totally get the whole dropping to your knees thing!".

"I mean, we're literally the rulers of hell, so it makes complete sense for you to act this way,".

The blonde male went on and on.

He seemed to be having a good laugh at all of this.

And he gesticulated and spoke all enthusiastically.

But you didn't really catch any of what was being said.

Your brain was way too overloaded to be able to do so.

And the longer Lucifer spoke, the worse you began to feel.

Much to your relief though, Lilith finally chimed in once again.

"Luci, I think you're completely overwhelming the poor thing,".

The queen of hell noted.

She sounded a little amused just like the male was.

Yet, there was a clear hint of concern in the way she spoke.

"Oh, am I?".

The king of hell paused.

Finally, he took a moment to take in your state.

And when he did, he awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck and mused:

"Yeah... I think I am,".

After Lucifer noted that, Lilith focused and spoke directly to you.

"We apologize, (Y/N).".

She started in a gentle tone.

And her expression was not as amused anymore.

At that certain moment, she seemed almost apologetic.

But not too much.

"It's just that it's not often someone doesn't recognize us, and we couldn't help ourselves,".

The demoness explained.

And you could've sworn her eyes held genuine concern in them.

Although her overall stance didn't really change much.

The tall blonde was still perfectly well-composed.

And she still appeared mostly unphased.

Then she finished her speech with:

"all was meant in good fun,".

At that final explanation, you paused.

Your racing thoughts came to a full stop.

And processing Lilith's words, you said cautiously:

"S- so we're... all good?".

Your words came out slow and soft.

And you were careful with your wording too.

You were kind of testing the waters in a sense.

The two rulers of hell kept surprising you.

They were continuously proving to not be a threat to you.

Yet one could never be fully sure - especially not in Hell.

And especially not as mere little imp.

Your question was met with a warm smile from Lilith.

And she nodded to your words, confirming them.

"Yes, we're all good".

She confirmed.

Relief washed over you then.

And you made sure to voice that.

"Oh- holy shi- I'm so relieved!".

You breathed.

And only then did you get off the ground.

"Fuuuuck,".

You gave a breathy chuckle.

And you wiped some metaphorical sweat off your forehead.

You felt on cloud nine - as if you've escaped death.

So, you couldn't really control your vocabulary at the moment.

Not like it mattered anyways.

"For- for a moment I thought-".

You stumbled over your words a little.

This entire thing felt just so unreal.

You were overwhelmed again.

But this time not exactly overwhelmed in a bad way.

"For a moment I thought it'd be off with my head or something!".

You admitted.

And you gripped your head.

You needed a moment to fully process everything.

"Whaaat? No! No, we'd never do that!".

Lucifer called, pulling your focus back to himself and his wife.

He looked and sounded astounded.

As if not grasping just where you got that idea from.

But then he paused, and he gripped his chin in thought.

"I mean, we probably did that at some point, centuries and centuries ago...".

He thought out loud.

And that made your eyes widen a little.

You couldn't tell of he was just kidding around again or not.

And you almost felt your unease returning.

But then came the following exchange.

"Or did that happen only in a dream...?".

The Devil mused, confused and uncertain.

To which Lilith shushed him gently yet disapprovingly:

"Lulu, you're not helping,".

That was all she said.

She didn't deny or confirm anything.

And Lucifer perked up just then.

"Oh- yeah, right... that was a little beside the point I was trying to make...".

Lucifer admitted awkwardly.

He even gave a slight apologetic look for a quick moment.

But that expression of his was pretty much short lived.

Since then he relaxed and offered a friendly smile.

"Sorry, dear (Y/N), I tend to trail off sometimes.".

He told you, voice calm and pleasant.

And his words were even accompanied by a low chuckle.

"I can confirm that,".

Lilith voiced in, her tone just as pleasant, as well as humorous.

The mood in the room suddenly felt much better.

It felt easier to just be in the moment.

Lilith's little jab at Lucifer's expense made the male give a playful glare.

And to that, the demoness offered a playful smirk back.

Then, the blond male spoke again.

"Anyhow, I think we should properly apologize for how we...".

Lucifer trailed off.

Seemingly trying to find the right term to use.

"had fun at your expense?".

Lilith filled the rest in.

Helping her lover name what they did correctly.

And the male nodded in agreement:

"Yeah... that'd be the word,".

Then, Lucifer added:

"So, what can we do to apologize?".

The words of the pair had you astonished.

After all, they did give you a verbal apology already.

So, you'd just assume the situation was over.

It wasn't like you wanted anything more from them anyways.

After all, getting an apology out of someone as an imp was near to impossible.

And having someone want to do a selfless act to undo their wrongdoing?

That was twice as impossible.

No one really cared for imps.

Nor did they really see them as equals.

And yet, here were the two highest ranking demons in all of hell.

Both of them treating you fair and with respect.

You were so beneath them.

Yet they treated you more kindly than your own kin.

And maybe even more kindly than you treated yourself.

"Oh- no, no, that's completely alright!".

You dismissed the pair's offer.

You really weren't used to such treatment.

And you almost felt bad if you were to accept.

"No real harm was done! All's good!".

You went on.

You really didn't want for these two to burden themselves for your sake.

Honestly, it felt a little wrong.

However, your dismissiveness got matched.

Lilith and Lucifer weren't accepting of you waving it all off.

"No, no, we insist!".

Lucifer cut your efforts off.

And he matched your own voice tone.

Dismissive and insistent, and also a bit loud.

"Truly, we insist.".

Lilith nodded along, not letting you speak.

"After all, words are just so cheap - actions speak much louder".

She persuaded some more.

And the Devil was there to her aid, saying:

"So, even if we shall do just a simple act like buying you coffee... We insist,".

Of course, your first instinct was to keep declining.

Yet, something in you had you pause and think.

This was an opportunity like no other.

For you seemed to get along well with the two so far.

And the pair seemed to understand you like no one else.

After all, the two shared your view on Pride needing more colour.

Who knew if you didn't have more things in common?

And perhaps this was the moment you've always been waiting for.

Did you really want to sabotage yourself and throw it all away?

The answer was no.

No, you didn't.

And so, with a bit of hesitation, you stated:

"I guess... that coffee does sound good?".

And with your sheepish smile and answer the deal was sealed.

Because the king and queen both grinned.

"Good, I'm sure we'll have a lot to talk about,".

Lilith hummed.

She sounded pleased.

"And we'll start with why Pride needs more colour".

Lucifer added in.

And he gave a playful wink.

Then, his red eyes met yours for a moment.

And the Devil smiled at you before calling eagerly:

"Off to a cafe we go!".

And with that, the male rushed towards the museum exit.

He seemed to completely forget about you and Lilith.

"You'll get used to it,".

Lilith told you with a smile.

And as her lilac gaze met yours, her eyes flashed red again.

But this time her red eyes didn't intimidate you.

You two then went ahead to follow Lucifer.

And on your way out of the museum, you had just one thought.

That being:

That now you couldn't really hate the colour of red as much as you used to.

___________________________________________

[limoki]

I said this on my twitter to bum-fuck no one but it's something I still feel so.

BPD (particularly Borderline Personality Disorder) has this really annoying consensus to it where "These people will find issues with finding and developing meaningful and healthy relationships" and most people will usually instead word it as:

"These people will never find a good friendship or Relationship."

or, even more annoying:

"Most abuser's have BPD."

And these are, by far, one of the most annoying, most harmful fucking things I've ever seen again, and again, and again.

Since this isn't twitter, I can actually voice my opinion on this without a stupid fucking word count limiting me. So! I have a lot to say.

I have BPD (again, Borderline). I am fucking paranoid if I'm abusing someone. I worry that I'm secretly not enough and that I'm going to be abandoned. I have sudden outbursts of highly positive emotions and also deeply negative ones. It's about as controllable as playing pool on a rocking sea ship. It's not that it's impossible. Just that I have to put way, WAY more work in to be considered what is the normal amount of an emotion to feel.

(I know that describing it like this is a loaded way to do so, but I don't want to get into what is considered normal by people who very obviously hate anything out of the norm.)

The way everyone talks about it, too. Fucking makes me livid.

This, got thrusted upon me yesterday. It really bothered me because:

ah, okay. Either all my girlfriends are just built different (good.)

OR

2. This person is genuinely being awful to his ex because they had BPD and don't know

And you fucking know what? Judging by what I was already figuring out (thanks to my one of my most wonderous girlfriend). It was probably, most likely 2.

I really fucking hate how BPD has become this fucking. Modifier that suddenly makes people hard to date. You gotta be patient, you gotta be gentle. The disorder is something, like all mental disorders, caused by trauma.

If you genuinely think this, ask yourself. Would someone with just depression be too much to date? How about someone with a disability? How about someone who is neurodivergent?

It'd be pretty fucked up to say "Yeah I don't wanna date someone with a wheelchair because they would be too much to help deal with their every day needs." So how is BPD any different.

I just want BPD to be treated like any other traumatic disorder, please. It can't be that hard to see it like this.

[rabbitsrams]

hi!! i love your neurodivergent reader and schlatt ideas :) do you have anything about reader slowly unmasking more the longer they date?

blush!!! :D tysm for sending in a req <3 i actually love this sm

i'm someone who has had to mask my stims and stuff many times in the past (and even the present) so i know how this feels lol

♡ on your first date, you kept your stims hidden

♡ drumming your fingers on your thighs out of sight, tapping your foot, you name it

♡ basically trying not to show him you're stimming

♡ he doesn't notice, ofc, but it's only when you're taking a walk after dinner when he notices you fidgeting

♡ thinks it's because of nerves, he's also nervous, but doesn't question it

♡ if you're having trouble forming sentences, he tries to say what you're thinking but eases off when it doesn't work

♡ but after a few times he lays off and lets you find the word and helps you if you need it

♡ being taken to a place where it's loud and you having to excuse yourself because it's too loud and you're getting sensory overload

♡ he follows you outside and sees you sitting on the sidewalk, hands over your ears

♡ "oh my god, are you okay?"

♡ "ah... n-no. i got sensory overload. way too loud."

♡ having to explain it to him

♡ takes him a bit to understand but once he does he makes sure you have a means to cover your ears (be it headphones or earmuffs or anything) if you're anywhere super loud

♡ vocal stims coming out unexpectedly when you're on a movie date

♡ your headphones are in so the sound in the theater is softer (you forgot them but he had a backup pair for u)

♡ repeating a line that you found funny for the rest of the movie and afterward

♡ he plays along, doesn't mind it at all

♡ "SUBLIME!"

♡ "me after you said yes to our first date."

♡ you often stimming while holding hands (mostly drumming your fingers against his skin or tracing patterns)

♡ very comforting to him and it's a sign you've grown more comfortable with stimming around him

♡ your first time infodumping about a special interest, you're apologizing for rambling too much but again, he doesn't mind and listens/lets you talk

♡ it becoming a normal thing as you get more comfortable around him

♡ i feel like he doesn't know a lot about neurodivergence but being with you helps him learn :)

♡ like i said before, easing up on teasing if you're not good with social cues/tones

♡ he tries his best and learns quickly as you grow more comfortable and unmask

[guujikaroko]

I'm re-reading LB1 and Daybit is so fucking funny. Beryl is there talking about how he can't have fun killing people if he's dead and Daybit chimes in with "Ah yes, it would be extremely difficult to engage in murder while your biological activity has ceased to function". The situation framed it as Daybit being a psycho but he actually just had a case of Eldritch Neurodivergence™ the whole time.

[albatris]

Snippet Sunday!

"Hey, Nat," Ripley said after a while, her voice taking on a tone Nat hadn’t heard before. "I really appreciate this, you know?"

"What?" he asked.

"You. Me. Hanging out," she said. "I don’t know if you’ve caught on yet but I am AuDHD through the roof. I’m not really good at friends."

"You seem way good at friends. You’re so chatty."

"Yeah, too much, dude. I come on too strong and weird people out." Ripley fiddled with the spirit box.

"Oh." Nat’s brow furrowed. "Well, I don’t mind. I love chatty people. It means I don’t have to talk as much."

"Fuck yeah."

"Fuck yeah!"

The box crackled to life, staccato bursts of static that dug into Nat's ears.

"Whoa," he said.

APPLI—CATION, said the box.

"Who's here with us?" Ripley asked.

The box spat out a bundle of nonsensical, rattling syllables.

"Can you repeat that?"

More static. Maybe TUNA.

"It’s been super nice to have another vampire around." Ripley switched the box off for a moment. "Someone who gets it, you know? And—you seem pretty neurodivergent, too. Someone who gets it on two fronts. What are you, even, though? You autistic?"

"Schizotypal."

"Oh. I don’t know what that is."

"It’s a personality disorder. I get a little bit of psychosis. A lot of paranoia. I’m awkward around people. I also dress weird, apparently."

"Personality disorder, huh? Childhood trauma gang rise up, hey?"

"Kind of. Maybe. I had a traumatic… teenhood, I guess?" Nat shook his head. "But nah, I was always a bit odd, even as a kid. I think I was born like this. But stress brings it out in force, you know?"

"Ah, okay," Ripley said. "And what do you think about all this?" She switched the box back on.

IN—DEX, said the box.

Ripley nodded thoughtfully, then said to Nat, "I'm dubbing thee honorary autistic."

"Thanks!"

[yourlocalmerchgirl]

The War Within - Part Two

Briefly Joel x Neurodivergant Reader Then Tommy x Neurodivergant wife reader

Part 1

Summary: The time has come after all these years for you to face Joel again. But when a conversation goes wrong and leaves you reeling after he finds out you and Tommy are married, your fierce protectiveness comes out as you defend Tommy after Joel accuses him of taking you from him

Warnings: 18+ MDNI, Reader admits to not wanting to be alive anymore in the last, Angst- Lots and lots of it in this chapter, Verbal fighting- lots of it , course language and lots of swearing, emotional, talks of anxiety, depression, Panic attacks, Neurodivergant reader. No use of y/n. Reader goes by the nickname Birdie. Use of typical pet names.

A/N: I hope you all love this new multi part journey I've been working on, I'm extremely proud of this story. I understand that this storyline/ themes aren't for everyone.

There is a possibility for a part 3 if everyone is interested that would be a look at Reader and Tommy's relationship and the love they have for each other and how they take care of each other following the events in this chapter so please let me know if you are interested in seeing that happen.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Your chest tightens, your thoughts dizzying as you try to comprehend what Tommy’s telling you.

“W-what?”

“He arrived today with some Firefly kid Marlene hired him to transport out here to some base. He immediately started asking about you, askin to see you.”

The look of panic in your eyes as you try to steady your breath has Tommy engulfing you in his warm embrace pulling you to his chest.

“I-I don’t think I’m ready to see him Tommy, I don’t think I can handle it”

“Sweet girl it’s ok, but I put him in his place, told him he had no right to demand to see you and that you had the right to decide. If you don’t want to see him you don’t have too, nobody’s gonna make you”

——————————————————————

Joels zoning out during dinner, they’ve been in Jackson for a couple of days, him and Ellie leave the day after tomorrow and he still hasn’t seen you much less heard anyone mention you. He’s starting to feel like you’re not here but that nobody wants to tell him. He’s pulled from his thoughts by Ellie’s constant chatter.

“Are you paying attention Joel?” Ellie teases

“Huh?”

“ I said I made a friend here at the stables?”

“Oh yea? The kids here do seem pretty nice”

“Not a kid dummy, an adult lady. She works at the stables and the barn”

“Ellie what did I tell you about bothering the people here?”

“I’m not bothering her, she’s really nice, pretty too. I’m not sure how old she, definitely not as old as you because you’re like ancient”

Joel chuckles at Ellie’s dig at him, but she doesn’t miss a beat.

“I met her the other day, I was trying to find somewhere quiet away from the other kids to eat and I ducked into the stables and she was there taking care of the horses and she said I could hang out in there. She’s been letting me help her feed the animals and talks with me. She keeps telling me I can come back and she teaches me more about the animals.”

“She sounds very nice, this mystery girl have a name?”

“Here’s the thing, she said her names Birdie, which i gotta admit at first I thought that was a friggen weird name but then she said everyone calls her that because of her love of animals which i think is pretty cool!”

Joel’s in shock, his mouth falls open when he hears your name, hears that you’re still going by that all these years later. Birdie was a nickname him and Tommy had given you before the outbreak because of you love of all animals. He’s able to snap his mouth closed before Ellie noticed his reaction.

“She has a radio in there and has these cassettes that my friend found when we were back at the QZ that she lets me listen too.”

“You should meet her, I bet you’d think she was pretty cool”

“Oh ah yea maybe, I’ll have to see if I can make it over there before we leave. I wouldn’t want to bother her.”

“Hey will you be alright here for a while? I gotta go talk to Tommy about some stuff before we depart”

“Oh yea sure, I’ll read more of those diaries I found in the bedroom”

Ellie hardly gets her answer out before Joel’s grabbing his jacket and racing out the door.

You’re already upstairs when you hear the frantic knocks at your front door.

You’re shutting off all the lights when you hear another frantic series of knocks before you hear him.

“Tommy you in there?” Joel’s muffled voice shouts through the door from the other side.

Tommy glances up the stairs to see you peeking downstairs from the darkness.

“What’s going on Joel? Everything alright?” Tommy asks as he opens the door.

Joel says nothing, just pushes past him into the house.

“Please Tommy just tell me where I can find her, we leave day after tomorrow and I just want to see her”

“Joel I don’t know what to tell you, I don’t think she wants to see you”

“Tommy please” Joel’s voice sounding more and more pained as they moved around the main floor of the house.

“Look I’m not sure if I’m gonna make it back from my journey. I ain’t what I used to be, I’m getting old, I’m slower than I used to be, I can’t think as quickly. Don’t hear so well out of my one ear. Im failing in my sleep Tommy, every morning when I wake up I feel like I’ve lost something. Please. If I’m gonna die I don’t want too of never seen her again.” Joel’s voice cracks as the tears start to well.

You’ve never heard Joel speak like that, with that kind of desperation and pain.

“I-it’s ok Tommy, I’ll talk to him” you say from partially down the stairs.

Joel stops, heart beat racing at the sound of your voice.

“She-she’s here?”

Tommy nods his head.

“Stay in here and let her come down on her own when she’s ready.”

Tommy heads up the stairs to meet you, he can tell by the way the dim light seeps into the stairway that your already crying.

“Ill be right up here if you need me sweet girl” Tommy whispers as he places a silent kiss on your forehead.

You wait a few beats before you slowly head down into the living room, taking a seat on the couch. Youre so quiet that it seems as though you’ve popped out of thin air when Joel looks up to see you sitting there eyes glued to the floor.

“Birdie?” Joels voice is just above a whisper, but you still hear it.

You pick your head up to look at him but quickly whip your head back down because the tears start as soon as you make eye contact with him.

Joel slowly makes his way to the couch, so quietly it’s as if he might scare you if he moves too quick. His work boots, the same boots he always had come into your life of vision.

“C-can I sit?”

You nod your head yes, still unable to get any words out.

“Birdie its-its so good to see you, I never thought I’d see you again”

“You too Joel” your voice is meek, your trying like hell to keep it together.

You can feel his gaze on you even though you’re not looking at him.

“I wish you would have told me you were leaving, we could have fixed things…. We can still fix things. I just don’t understand”

His emphasis on we can still fix things makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up.

“We couldn’t talk about things without getting into a screaming match Joel, how were we supposed to fix things?” You say finally letting your eyes meet his, tears rolling down your cheeks.

You flinch away when Joel reaches up to bush the tears away, but a couple of his fingers make contact, smoothing along the curve of your cheek.

“Sorry, force of habit” you mumble when you see his hurt expression at you flinching. Never in all your time with him had you ever flinched away from him.

“I just….I just don’t understand why you left.”

“You didn’t see my note?”

“I did I just….I would of done anything to figure things out. I would of done anything to take care of you”

“You say that now Joel but do you not remember telling me that night during our last fight that you should be taking care of Sarah instead of me, that for the Hundredth time you were upset that I was crying during our argument. Reminding me that I was too sensitive for the state of the world”

“I will never fuckin’ forgive myself for saying stuff like that in the heat of the moment that I never meant.”

“I know and take responsibility for the fact that I was a lot to deal with. I’m not trying to blame you solely for our issues. I know that i spiraled when the outbreak happened. Forcing me to cold turkey not to have therapy, to not have the schedule and consistency that I desperately needed to making it through life day to day. I know that my panic attacks, anxiety and dissociative tendencies where thrown at you all at once when you where trying to navigate the loss of Sarah.”

You pull your gaze back down to your feet before you continue.

“You have no idea how badly I wanted to of had the chance to show you those parts of myself slowly, in a different way. But our relationship was doomed from the start, we’d only been together six months When the outbreak happened. Nothing we could of done to fix anything, we just weren’t meant to be Joel and that’s ok.”

Joel scowls slightly at you. You didn’t mean for your words be be painful but they clearly stung him.

Joel sighs, rubbing his face with both of his callused hands.

“ I loved you. I hope you know that”

“That’s unbeknownst to me Joel”

“You can’t be serious”

“I’m not a fucking mind reader Joel. There are times when I thought you did. But we were together for years…years Joel and you never once told me you loved me. I told you everyday that I loved you. Hell I told you I loved you even on the days where all we did was fight and fuck. The only time I ever heard you say it was.” You stopped your self before you could finish your thought. You didn’t want to go there, to dig up all again.

You should of known Joel wasn’t going up give up so easily.

“The only time you heard it was when?” Joel pressed, eager to know what you had to say.

“ it doesn’t matter Joel, just drop it.”

“No I wanna hear it, I wanna figure this out”

“Please Joel just drop it, it’s not going to do anyone any good bringing all this up again. it doesn’t matter”

Joel sits back a little bit folding his arms over is chest. “ please just continue I want to hear it”

“ Fucking a Joel FINE, if you really want to hear it. The only time I ever heard you say I love you to anyone other than Sarah was the night I came home to see you buried deep inside Tess. Hearing you call her baby girl, telling her how much you loved her as you fucked her.”

You’re seething at this point. Burning so hot with anger that you feel like you could just burst into flames. Joel on the other hand looks like he’s just seen a ghost as all the color drains from his face.

“Oh my god…you-you saw that?”

“Of course I saw it Joel, I came home after being out all night looking for you to that”

“That’s why you were weren’t home? You were out looking for me after curfew? You shouldn’t have done that, those places are dangerous, you could of gotten hurt without me there to protect you”

“I shouldn’t of done that? No Joel you shouldn’t of fucked another women in our bed. I’m sorry that I risked myself to search all over the dark and seedy areas of the QZ for you because I was scared to death about the fedra guards catching you and beating the shit out of you when you were likely to drunk to defend yourself”

“I can’t keep having this conversation, it doesn’t matter Joel because in the end you both got what you wanted, Tess got you and you got someone you didn’t have to take care of”

You can feel the panic seeping in as your chest tightens and your heart races. Your desperately trying to breath deeply, trying to calm yourself as the panic spreads throughout your body. Joel notices your having a hard time and moves to wrap you in his arms, to try to comfort you the way he always should have.

“Ple-please don’t fucking touch me Joel, give me room to breath” you breath out as you snap your head up.

Tommy’s there before you in a flash. Running down the stair two to three steps at a time when he hears your breathy tone. The way your voice sounds when a panic attack is coming on, When he knows you need him without you having to express it.

Joel watches how good Tommy is with you with guilt and admiration. Seeing how Tommy’s able to help you through your episode, with the care that he himself should of shown you.

But those feelings are quickly replaced with red hot anger when he notices the matching rings you are both wearing when you bring your hands up to cup over Tommy’s hands as he cradles your face.

“Christ are you two fucking married!” Joel shouts, unable to hold it in.

Tommy feels you tense and whimper under his touch as Joel stands.

“We are, but now is not the time to discuss this” Tommy says in warning as he looks up at Joel, but his hands never leave you as he smooths his thumbs back and fourth on your cheeks to sooth you.

“This is why you stopped messaging me back isn’t it?”

“Enough Joel”

“It is isn’t it? Because you were ashamed to tell me, to admit that you took the one thing I had left away from me”

“Isn’t it?” Joel continues to press, seeing red and really unsure about what he’s even saying at this point.

You let out a strangled whimper, all the yelling and emotions overstimulating you, becoming to much to bare.

“It’s ok baby, don’t listen to him, just focus on my voice. I’ll protect you.. we can get through this” Tommy whispers as he rests his forehead against your head. He knew he wouldn’t take it well, and he was prepared to take all the verbal jabs, all the yelling and anger from Joel. He’s taken it before this time would be no different. All he cared about was shielding you, protecting you the best he could. It’s all he ever cared about was protecting you, keeping you safe. Tommy was terrified how damaging this was going to be for you.

“C’mon Tommy let me hear you say it! You never could stand me having something you didn’t.”

That what the final straw for Tommy.

“Fucking a Joel that’s enough, I said! You’re really going to do this in front of her even though you can tell she’s distressed.”

“I think she should hear it too, because I really have a hard time believing she just left without being persuaded”

Tommy’s standing now, facing Joel and directly in front of you as if he’s acting as a shield trying his hardest to protect you from the blow Joel is about to deal.

“What exactly are you tryin’ to get at Joel?”

“She wouldn’t just go off by herself, she was always by my side, to nervous to wonder around on her own much less leave the fucking QZ without me.”

“Funny, she might of never left you’re side but you ever think about all times you left her fucking side Joel?” Tommy snarls. Tommy feels you gripping his leg from behind him at the sound of him defending you.

“She was fucking fragile, always havin’ those episodes…”

“They’re not just fucking episodes Joel, they’re panic attacks” Tommy cuts Joel off, getting madder by the second. The fact that Joel is talking about you this way, insinuating what he’s insinuating.

“My point is she was fragile, she wasn’t of right mind, there’s no way she would of just decided to leave. You were around all the time, you knew she wasn’t ok and you used that to get her to leave”

Your squeezing tighter on Tommy’s leg.

“Enough Joel! This ends now. Do you even fucking hear yourself?

You let out a strangled guttural noise as you gripped Tommy’s leg to stand up on shaky legs.

Tommy turns giving you his full attention

“Baby it’s ok, dont push yourself. It’s not worth it”

“No I need to say something that he needs to hear” you say pulling away from Tommy, your piercing hazel eyes locked on Joel.

“ Your not the only one in pain Joel, your not the only one that’s hurting, that’s lost a loved one or experienced death. Did you ever even consider what it was like for Tommy to loose Sarah too? Or how going through the outbreak and doing some of the things we’ve all had to do to survive could have brought back horrific memories of his time in the military?”

Joel can’t do anything but stare back at you like a deer in head lights. So you take a deep breath and press on.

“The fact you would even think that Tommy would be capable of using my mental state to manipulate me into leaving you is low Joel, even for you. Like I can’t even fathom that you think he would do that to you and I. I’m going to make something very fucking clear to, I’m the one that asked him to join the fireflies. I’m the one that showed up at his door that early morning after seeing you and Tess because I needed to get away and I had no other options. Because if I’m being honest I wouldn’t have lived much longer if I stayed at the QZ.”

Joel arches his eyebrow in a concerned manner “wh-what do you mean you wouldn’t of lived much longer?”

Taking a ragged breath in as the tears begin to cascade down your cheeks you reply.

“I-I I didn’t want to live anymore. I was being suffocated by life, everyday the weight on my chest got heavier and heavier. Somedays it was nearly impossible to breath. I didn’t even feel like I was in my fucking body anymore. So i made the decision to leave on my own because I was fragile, because I didn’t want to die but I wouldn’t of survived feeling like that. To hear you admit you knew how fragile I was, how off I was is a special kind of hell thats going to take me along time to heal from.”

“Birdie…. It hurts me so much that I hurt you so badly” Joel moves forward to try to embrace you , to comfort you but you pull away from him.

“I always felt so small and weak compared to you. All I ever wanted was a fraction of the love and support I gave you in return. For someone to tell me it was ok, that I’d get through it. Just someone to fucking be there for me. The love between Tommy and I came slow. I agonized for 2 years about leaving, feeling selfish for not being there to care for you. But I had to think about taking care of myself.” You said before running up the stairs into the dark abyss of your room.

“ I hope your fucking happy with the damage you caused with what ever kind of point you were trying to make. I suggest you get the fuck out of this house before you cause anymore trauma for her, because I can guarantee you she will be reeling from this for a long time.”

“Tommy please I…”

“ I’m not messing around Joel get the fuck out. I need to go check on her and make sure she’s ok and I’m sure as hell not going to continue to fucking go there with you tonight” Tommy shouts as he slams the door.

Taglist:

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@coolchris77 @caitlynsixxx @natasharoblesjoneshi @jarman147 @bobgirllll @lovelessamai @hydralicious-bucky

@bellaramseysbitch @rav3n-pascal22 @saltymagazinecreation

@oriborealis250 @tybsbnbn @mellowbananacowboybandit @f1shb0nez @d19evyn @cafeznha @gigachadcowboy

@racheldon @elkenenvy @mirandablue1 @jellybeanxc

@adrien8097 @sweetlemonade11 @clownd1ck @nightmarebeforchristmas @moravalentine @silv3rmind

@miniatureangelhoundsoul @nopenopenope10484 @harryscumcloth @morgaussy, @kalllistos @spikershoyo @musings-of-a-rose @alongfortheridereader @princessmk21

[keithbutgay]

vat7k headcanons?

oh my gosh my time has come (you will probably regret this)

so first off imma reference my like three other posts i've made on the topic because i'm a nerd

starting with lgbt+ headcanons-

hugo is genderfluid and likes men i don't make the rules (he/she/they)

i am very much a trans varian truther. in my mind they use he/they pronouns and is also very biromantic

transing nuru's gender too- i love transfemme nuru (she/her) and also she's a lesbian definitely

yong gets the aroace nonbinary treatment

okay moving on to headcanons about languages-

its canon that varian speaks like three languages but i headcanon that he is fluent in coronan, saporian, and is learning the dark kingdom's language

hugo definitely knows so many languages because he gets around. i like to think he's fluent in ingvarran, coronan and bayangoran

i love the idea that yong is still learning coronan and that hugo sometimes has to translate for him or they repeat things for him sometimes because varian talks too fast or they use an unfamiliar word or like accents trip him up

on a seperate note in my mind coronan is german, bayangoran is mandarin, ingvarran is farsi (based on this post)

one of my favorite possible vat7k storylines is when hugo finds out about varian's past and i love the idea that he found out because of a wanted poster they found- perfect angst potential. on that note, i also believe that the rest of them would have heard about varian (the alchemist) when he was still wanted for example

hugo would have been told about him from donella, whether he was always told to be better and be like varian, or that he admired varian and thought he was really cool and dreamed of working with him

nuru had heard about him through horror stories about the kidnapping and attempted murder of the royal family. she most likely would have been scared of varian when she found out, not trusting him not to hurt her

i honestly think yong wouldn't understand. i don't think his parents would have told him if they even knew, and he would have been like seven at the time, so

hugo was varian's bi awakening except not really. he had liked guys before that but hadn't realized that was what he was feeling

they definitely met cass while on their adventures and she definitely had a girlfriend

ruddiger and prometheus hate each other

hugo is extremely jealous of ruddiger as well. ah yes him, his boyfriend, and his boyfriend's raccoon that's taking up all his attention

firmly believing in hugo showing up one day with period products because he might be a loser but he's not a jerk and nuru not knowing how to tell him she's trans while varian (also not out) comes up and just takes the pads being like 'thanks i needed these'

varigo-

t4t obviously

also they're both neurodivergent i dont make the rules

they hate each other but like not

like in the sense that, if they were asked if they liked each other, they would be like ew gross no i hate this man

and then at the end of the conversation varian kisses hugo on the cheek and is just like see you at home babe and everyone is like w h a t

they argue nonstop, to the point of being violent, and then someone changes the subject and hugo's in varian's lap

obsessed with that one au where they were in prison together

also obsessed with hugo dropping the piano on eugene's head

this entire post

might add to this later but here you go have fun!