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natashaslesbian · 16 days ago

Text

Under Their Gaze | N|M

Summary: Your first day of S.H.I.E.L.D training doesn’t go as planned

Request: First day of shield training with Blackhill watching

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings/Content: Past Hydra Experiment Reader

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You were just 5 years old when Hydra snatched you from your bedroom and murdered your parents. You were raised to be a ruthless solider and Hydra did everything they could to make you what they wanted. They put you through countless experiments in order to take control of your mind, and when they failed you were punished for their mistakes. You had accepted that this was your life now and you never could’ve expected the avengers to raid the base on a random Tuesday. Ever since you were little, you had idolised these heros. You grew up in New York and it was the avengers who saved your home when they first assembled in 2012.

You were 10 when the team found you, they were skeptical of you at first, being unsure if you were enhanced. You had never learnt English so you were unable to communicate with them, but a certain redhead just couldn’t leave you behind. When the widow first spoke to you, her Russian accent was clear as day. The widow could tell you understood her with your small nods and head shakes, she was able to convince her fellow avengers to take you back to the tower. The archer man had agreed that you needed medical attention, you couldn’t walk due to your injuries. It took a lot of convincing but eventually you allowed the Russian lady to lift you up and take you home.

Once you settled into the groove of things it became hard for the team to let you go. You grew within the avengers tower, and the hero’s you had once idolised soon became your friends. You always stuck close by to Natasha, following her everywhere she went. She couldn’t explain it, but Natasha felt a certain protection over you. She would always check in on you, and pulled you behind her when a stranger got too close. She can still remember the first time you accidentally called her ‘mama’. The redhead started teaching you English and your ability to learn was outstanding. After a few months, Fury approved you to stay with the avengers and eventually through the official channels, Natasha adopted you.

You loved your new family, but your mom was your favourite person ever. Over time, the two of you became inseparable and Natasha made sure you were given a normal childhood. By age 14, you had watched your mom fall in love with a brunette S.H.I.E.L.D agent. Natasha was worried you wouldn’t be very accepting of Maria, you were very territorial over your mother. The women were surprised when the first day Maria stayed over you asked her to stay. It felt like years but finally after a few months the agent agreed to move to the tower. You were overjoyed, you had finally got what you always wanted, a family. But something was still missing.

You had been raised to be a solider, and although Natasha had given you back a regular life, you could never escape the itch. You knew you wanted to be good, you would never let Hydra win and complete their task of turning you into a murderer. You wanted to help people, you wanted to be a hero. Just like your mama. It was late one night when you slowly approached your mothers’ bedroom. You knew Natasha would still be awake, waiting for her girlfriend to return from a mission. You knocked shyly onto the wooden door and heard the familiar sound of your favourite voice welcoming you in. “Hey sweetie, what are you still doing up?” Natasha softly smiled when she saw you.

She was worried when your eyes seemed watery “hey, come here baby” she said with open arms. “Are the nightmares back?” Natasha asked as you climbed into her embrace. It was no surprise that you struggled to sleep when you were first rescued from hydra, it was years after you arrived that you finally slept through the night. “No it’s not that” you sniffled as you cuddled into your mom. “You wanna talk? Or do you just need mommy cuddles” Natasha cooed as she began brushing your hair with her manicured fingers. “I always need mommy cuddles” you smiled “but there is something else, I just don’t want you to be mad” you murmured. “Sweetheart you know I could never be mad at you. What is it?” Your mom gently asked.

You sighed softly as you shuffled in your mamas hold. You had wanted to ask her for so long but deep down you felt like you were betraying her. “I wanna train to be an avenger” you whispered. Natasha paused in her motions and you were sure she was angry. “Ok” your mom said, not giving you any hint as to how she was feeling. You pulled your head away from Natasha’s chest and looked up to see her smiling. You let out your nervous breath as you smiled back at her. “Why did you think I would be mad about that?” Your mom asked. “Because ever since you found me, you’ve done everything you can to give me a normal life. I feel like I’m letting you down by going back to that stuff” you said shyly.

“Baby ‘that stuff’ was all you knew for those 5 years, and you’re right I have tried to give you a normal life but you’re 16 now. I don’t want you too, but you’re growing up, you get to make your own choices now. And I know that you won’t ever use ‘that stuff’ to hurt people, you’ll use it to help them and I couldn’t be more proud of you for that” Natasha smiled. “You could never let me down, no matter what you do. I am always on your side” your mom said as she pulled you flush against her. “I love you mama” you whispered. “I love you too y/n/n” Natasha said. “When can I start?” You questioned with a smirk after a few moments of silence. “I’ll talk to cap tomorrow and see what I can do” Natasha grinned.

It was a torturous 3 week wait until you were finally able to start S.H.I.E.L.D training. You had hoped your mom would be able to fast track you straight to avenger training but Maria insisted you should start alongside everyone else. She’d never admit it, but the brunette wanted to keep you as safe as possible for as long as possible, she already loved you like her own. When the day finally arrived you awoke at the crack of dawn and prepared yourself a hearty breakfast. “Now this is a rare occasion” Natasha said when she found you in the kitchen “since when do you wake up before me” she giggled. “I’m just so excited mama. Is Maria up yet?” You asked as you sat down to begin your meal.

“Yeah she’s up” Natasha said as she avoided eye contact. “Mom?” You questioned, you knew all her little quirks too well “what is it?” You asked. “Coulson can’t make training today, so Maria is covering and Fury has requested me to assist. You shoulders dropped at the news “but you’re not allowed to train me, or Maria. You’re family so they won’t allow it!” You frowned. “Maria’s sorting it baby, it’s gonna be okay I promise” your mom said as she came to your side “and if you have to start next week then you’ll start next week” she said. “No! I have to start today! Why does nothing ever go right for me!” You cried as you slammed your fists down on the table. “Y/n!” Natasha called after you as you stormed out of the room.

You ran down the hallway before you collided with a large figure “woah easy there little widow” the man said. “Uncle Steve” you whimpered when you finally locked eyes with him “I’m sorry I didn’t see you” you sniffled. “Hey kiddo what’s wrong?” The solider said when he noticed your watery eyes. “They’re not gonna let me start training uncle Steve” you cried as you collapsed in his arms. “Who sweetie?” He asked “Fury, and my mom. Phil can’t make training so mom and Maria are taking over which means I can’t go” you said, hyperventilating slightly. “Easy little spider, deep breaths ok” Steve said as he comforted you “you can start next week right? He asked. “That’s what mom said but I need to start now! I’ll fall behind if not” you whined. Your uncle continued to comfort you until an idea finally reached his mind “you’re not gonna fall behind, I promise you” he said. You pulled back in confusion at his words “what do you mean?” You asked. “Meet me in the gym in 30 minutes” Steve smiled.

Natasha was devastated when Maria returned to the kitchen with a frown. “She’s gonna be so crushed” the brunette sighed. “I think she already is, I told her we were taking training” Natasha said. “Where is she?” Her girlfriend asked “Steve said she’s gone for a walk, we’ll catch up with her later” Natasha said as Maria came into her arms. The pair slowly made their way to the training facility with dropped shoulders and sad eyes, they wanted nothing more than for you to be with them, it just wasn’t possible. The hour with the new recruits felt like a lifetime despite them rushing through to get it done. Natasha collapsed with a huff when it was finally finished, the new agents where extremely talented but the redhead just wanted interested today. “Come on” Maria said as she approached her love with open hands “let’s go find our girl” she smiled.

The two went to your bedroom first, figuring you would be back from your ‘walk’ by now. They were confused when they found the room empty, as well as their own bedroom. They searched the entire tower until Maria finally figured it out “we didn’t check the gym” she sighed. “Okay? Steve said he was gonna work out so why would she be…..oh uncle Steve” Natasha smiled as she finally put two and two together. Your mom knew that you were the most important person in Steve’s life, he loved you like you were his own and would do anything to make you happy. “Let’s go” Maria chuckled as the two ran down to the gym.

“Wait” Natasha said, stopping her girlfriend just outside the door “don’t go flying in, I wanna watch first” your mom said, pride almost tearing her apart despite not even seeing you yet. “Ok” Maria said as she gently opened the door, just a crack. It was almost comical how your mom and her girlfriend squished together to peak through the small opening. Natasha smiled instantly when she saw you effortlessly taking down the dummy in the boxing ring. “Good y/n!” Steve praised “right hook! Upper cut! Good!” He called, guiding you through your first training session. “What are you doing?” Maria whispered when Natasha almost knocked her over. “I’m getting comfortable” she shrugged as she perched on the floor. “Okay” the brunette giggled.

You never noticed your mom watching you, you’d learn later, but you continued working with Steve and exceeding his expectations. You wished Natasha and Maria could be there to see you, little did you know they were right outside silently cheering you on. They couldn’t be more proud of you.

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A/N: I kinda got carried away with this one but I hope you like it!

- Astara Bell

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[Taglist]

@saraaahsstuff / @dannipotatoo / @tobiaslut / @nevaeh-daughterofvalcarol / @marvelnatasha12346 / @yelenasdiary / @mousetheorist / @ashadash0904 / @strange-night-owl / @kkreader78o ?? / @hatergirl-69 / @asv-xx ??

#marvel #natasha romanoff #black widow #marvel fic #nat x reader #avengers #natasha x daughter!reader #maria hill #natasha romanoff x reader #maria hill x reader #maria hill x natasha romanoff #blackhill #agents of shield

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tvseries-writings · 7 months ago

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From a great power comes great responsibilities

Wandanat x Bioquake x Bobbi x reader

Plot: Reader goes beyond her limits with her powers to help others (exhausts her powers)

TW: death for a moment(?)

It all happens so fast that you don't realize it until the building starts collapsing over your heads. You see a chunk of concrete the size of a car fall on top of you, and before your brain can connect, your body acts on instinct, carrying you, Daisy, and Bobbi out of the building. You concentrate on teleporting all three of you, intact, inside the quinjet where Jemma, Natasha and Wanda are running the operation, or at least, were before everything went to hell.

You land on the floor of the plane with a thud, falling forward and coughing hard to expel the dust that has filled your lungs. You glance at your girls making sure they are okay and then, you cross your arms to teleport again but Natasha's hand on your left arm stops you.

"Don’t even think about it, everything is collapsing, you can't teleport in there. It is suicide and you are not going to save anyone if you are dead, do you understand me?"

You swallow, watching the building collapse, and so, with a small smile on your lips, you lean toward Natasha and kiss her. It lasts a few seconds and she is distracted enough to let go of her grip on you.

"I'm sorry but I have to do this," you whisper and then, you close your eyes and feel the earth vanish from under your feet. You focus on the 'one safe place inside the building that you know with absolute certainty will not collapse. The beauty of a secret Hydra base was the bunkers, after all. Those crazy fucking Nazis had thought that sacrificing at least a hundred of their own people was a fair price to pay to take out three S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, and they had blown up the load-bearing walls of the building with a simple and very trivial click. Nazis, they never change.

When you open your eyes again and realize you are not dead or under some boulder, you gloat internally and mentally thank Natasha for forcing you to learn the floor plan of that base. You remember perfectly her stern look when she had presented you with the mission and forced you to learn every single detail by heart. At that moment you had hated it but now...now you really wanted to kiss her.

You raise your hands in the air when you notice a score of soldiers pointing their guns at you, hiding behind them their "incentives," as Hydra liked to call them. Wives, husbands, children, mothers and fathers hid behind those men and women in black with a crest that did not belong to them.

"It's okay, I just want to get you out of here. I can teleport you all but in multiple groups."

You curse yourself internally, you know you'll never be able to take this much effort, the last time you tried to teleport five people together you fainted and were unconscious for six hours you can't even imagine what would happen with forty, including soldiers and families.

You take a deep breath and think quickly about how you can take everyone out of there. The floor under your feet trembles and just as the children begin to cry, the earpiece in your ear comes alive.

"Y/n, damn it, Daisy can't hold it much longer...you have to get out of there, do you hear me? The structure won't hold much longer" Bobbi yells in your ear and you nod, well aware that she cannot see you, before giving her a verbal response.

"I'm trying honey, thanks for the advice though."

You mumble sarcastically, no longer listening to what your girlfriends are shouting at you over the comms and focusing instead on getting the people in front of you to safety. The soldiers lower their weapons and pull off the bands on your arm, throwing them to the ground.

"Are there others in the base?"

"They're all dead, ma'am" the lieutenant, or who you think is the lieutenant, answers you by looking around as if to confirm what she just said. Your stomach clenches at the thought of all those people who died for a cause they didn't even believe in but you quickly shake off that feeling, you don't have time for it. You quickly count them, noting that there are twenty-five of them before thinking about how to get them all out of there safely.

"So… I can take all the children outside."

You point to the little ones; some of them are crying while others are looking at you with wide, fearful eyes but charged with the same admiration and hope with which a child looks at his favorite superhero. There are nine children but you can make it, they are worth four times one adult, right? You can even take four adults with you, then; you have to do it, you won't have the strength to make three more trips, you are sure.

You gather them around you and have each of them touch arms or legs, depending on where their little hands reach, and do the same with the four women, two old and two young, who accompany them. As they say, women and children first.

"Y/n, we have set up a camp out here, four hundred meters from the base in a southwesterly direction."

-What the hell is the South?" you think, before shrugging your shoulders and closing your eyes. The feeling of the floor vanishing beneath your feet is not something you will ever get used to, if you have to be honest. You hear the children scream, whether from excitement or fear you can't tell, and then, in less than a second, you find yourself at that poorly set up base camp Jemma told you about a few seconds ago. A little dizziness forces you to lean on the ground, on the hot sand beneath you, and small drops of blood color the grains beneath your fingers. You raise your hand, reaching up your nose and finding the source of the bleeding. Children are being rounded up by an officer but you fail to recognize him as your girlfriends run toward you. Jemma has a first aid kit in her hand, but before she can set about playing cheerful surgeon with you, you scan to the side, staggering on your own feet.

"I'm fine, I've got to get back in there."

"You can't stand y/n, you can't-"

You frown, noticing only in that moment that Daisy is not there with all of you.

"Where's Dee?"

"She fainted, tried to absorb as many shocks as possible. She's collapsed y/n and that's also what's going to happen to you if you continue, you're already in a very bad way."

Jemma lifts your head, causing your gazes to cross and looking critically at your pupils and the nosebleed that doesn't seem to have any intention of stopping coming out. You back away a few steps, looking into their eyes.

"Go to Daisy, I'll take care of this," you say and then disappear again.

You repeat the same process as before, surrounding yourself with six soldiers and watching the remaining six.

"I will come back for you, I promise."

And as you disappear into thin air, another tremor shakes the ground.

The landing is more abrupt this time. Your heart beats so weakly that you feel as if oxygen is not getting to your brain. Contrary to what you expected, Natasha grabs you by the arms before your face can splat on the scorching sand. You struggle to stay awake and if so out that you don't even notice Daisy, pale, sweaty, and trembling, over the shoulders of the former Russian spy. You blink a few times to focus on the image in front of you and finally the sounds reach your ears again.

"Y/N!"

Natasha shakes you by the shoulders and you awaken from your stupor. The worried gazes of Wanda, Jemma, Daisy, Natasha and Bobbi are fixed on you as Natasha gently lays you on the ground and Jemma places a bottle of water on your lips, helping you drink it. As soon as you remember where you are, you try to sit up but Daisy stops you, simply putting a hand on your chest to keep you down.

"I'm-I'm fine, mm-missing six people-D-I have to an-go."

You stammer, the effort you've put in doesn't even make you able to utter a coherent and clea sentence. Another jolt shakes the floor beneath your feet and Daisy groans in pain, bringing her hands to her head and squeezing her eyes shut. That small advantage allows you to roll over and with an absurd effort you manage to get to your feet and disappear back under their gazes.

When you get to the bunker, the first thing you do is fall to your knees and throw up. You completely empty your stomach under the disgusted gaze of the six soldiers in front of you. You wipe your mouth with your suit, wrinkling your nose at the disgusting taste of vomit in your mouth and leaning against the wall to pull yourself up without passing out. You must hold on a little longer, just a little, and then you can collapse to the ground.

The six soldiers surround you-diligently avoiding the pool of vomit on the ground and the blood that keeps coming out of your nose-and in a moment you are out.

As soon as you hit the sand, you sprawl to the ground. Your cheek scrapes against the sand and this time Natasha is not quick enough to catch you. Jemma drops to her knees next to you, turns you so that your face is facing her but your eyes are closed. She checks your chest and when she notices that the latter does not rise or fall, she checks your pulse before a gasp of terror and fear escapes her lips.

"Bobbi, adrenaline and defibrillator. Now!"

Natasha tilts your head back, her eyes glazed over as she opens your mouth and blows air into your lungs. Jemma begins compressions.

1,2,3,4,5

Nat puts air into your lungs and your chest rises and falls once before falling back inert. Wanda's sobs and Jemma's barely stifled ones are the only sound before a crack makes your girls nauseous.

"It's okay, it happens during compressions," Jemma's voice trembles as she says it and then, she performs another round of compressions. Your arms burn but that pain is nothing compared to the dull ache that is burning in your chest at that moment.

1,2,3,4,5

Natasha forces your chest up again and then Bobbi arrives with defibrillator and adrenaline in hand. She is sweating and her heart is racing. She has never run so fast in her entire life.

"Bobbi, take my place."

Jemma continues with compressions, then, on her go, Bobbi gets in place and follows her own rhythm.

"Come on rockstar, it's not your time yet, come on."

Bobbi's breath barely hides the tremor in her voice but not the tears that line her cheeks. It takes two defibrillator shocks before your heart starts beating again.

"Oh my God" Wanda bursts into tears, leaning over your face and gently kissing your forehead, brushing a few strands of sweaty hair off your face.

"Good, you did great love" Natasha whispers, taking your hand in her own as Bobbi laughs from relief.

Daisy instead stands by, frowning, and Jemma is the first to notice.

"Dee, what's wrong?"

Daisy looks at you and then, nods.

"Something's wrong, her heart, it doesn't have the usual vibes, non-"

And then, your heart stops beating again.

"Fuck, Bobbi give me the adrenaline."

Jemma Simmons never swears but there are always exceptions.

Jemma performs two more rounds of compressions before injecting adrenaline into your chest. She hooks you up to one of the monitors that Fitz had devised a few months earlier, at the request of the biochemist, for just such situations, and when he sees that the line remains flat, his heart, too, seems to stop for a few seconds.

Your body is shaken by the shock emitted by the defibrillator; it arches upward and then falls back to the sand as hard as a puppet whose strings have been suddenly dropped. The line remains flat and Jemma's tears now gush without limit.

"No no, Jem you have to try again. She can't, she can't..."

Wanda bursts into tears, looking at your lifeless body lying on the ground. Natasha punches the ground with such force that the crack that can be heard echoing cannot mean anything good. Bobbi cries as she takes the former Russian spy's hand and gives her a look. Anything not to think about what just happened.

"No, it doesn't end like that."

"Daisy...she-"

Daisy takes your lifeless body in her hands, shaking it by the shoulders.

"Do you understand me? You can't fucking die, you can't. You promised us, you stubborn idiot, you promised us!"

The Inhuman hits your chest hard, her fist closed, and without her really being able to control what she's doing, a powerful jolt goes through your chest and crashes against the ground, creating a small crack beneath you, and then, the flat line of the monitor disappears, replaced by regular little roller coasters.

"W-what?" Daisy whispers, sitting on the floor suddenly much more tired than before from the effort she has just made. Jemma hurries to personally check your pulse and when she feels the pulse under her fingers, a shuddering breath of joy leaves her lips.

"I...I think your tremors got her heart beating again Dee."

Jemma does not detach her fingers from your wrist, lulling herself into the sweet sensation of your heartbeat, albeit weak. Wanda covers her face, bursting into tears, and the other girls also let out a liberating cry, releasing all the tension and fear they had felt up to that moment.

...................................................................................................

Your body takes five days to heal just enough to open your eyes. You realize you are in the Quinjet's medical capsule within seconds, by now you have been there so many times over the years that you know the smallest details: the familiar beeping sound of your heartbeat, the red button to call Jemma just below the lamp behind the back of the bed, the IV that feeds drugs into your veins, and the glass from which Jemma checks that you are not doing anything the doctor has forbidden you to do. A little unfair of her since she is the doctor. You feel as if a truck has hit you and then a car has run over you to complete the job. You raise your hand to scratch your nose but the oxygen mask prevents you from doing so so you squeeze it between your fingers to remove it but just as you are about to do so, a hasty knock against the clear glass causes you to smile a small smile of exasperation. Even before you turn around, in fact, you already know that you will see your beautiful doctor on the other side. To your surprise, however, she is not alone.

"You just woke up and already you want to take off your mask, I have no words really. Who is the doctor here? You have to do what I tell you if you want to get better, between you and Dais I really don't know who is worse."

Jemma admonishes you and you blush, feeling like a child being scolded by his parents.

"Hey, what do I have to do with this now?" Daisy pouts before slinging herself into your arms. You can't help but notice that his forearm is completely bandaged. When he notices where your gaze points, the Inhuman shrugs.

"It was worth it."

She slides the mask off your face, kissing you with so much passion and love that it leaves you breathless for a few seconds before the Inhuman promptly rushes to slip the mask back over your face.

"You scared us malyshka" Natasha approaches you and her plastered hand makes you frown. The Russian blushes, and for some reason you realize you don't really need to ask her how she broke her hand. Wanda caresses your cheek, leaving a tender kiss on your forehead.

"How are you feeling detka?"

"I'm just a little tired but I'm fine; exactly what happened?"

Their faces darken and that joy you had seen quickly fades.

"You collapsed, your heart couldn't take the strain, and we had to revive you twice." Bobbi's voice trembles as she says this and you reach out your hand toward her; the blonde grabs it and intertwines your fingers, turning a small smile to you.

"You were really a rockstar but if you do that again, I think we might actually kill you."

"Oh yes, don't think we haven't thought about what punishment to give you. Besides not being able to use your powers for at least four months-"

"What? Four months? But that's an eternity-" you jerk back to your seat, removing your mask and immediately regretting it as your vision blurs and the pain in your ribs increases exponentially, so much so that you lean to the right and vomit into the only thing you can grab.

Jemma strokes your back while Wanda holds your hair as you empty the meager contents of your stomach. As soon as you finish, you are so weak that dizziness takes over and your head falls back forward. If it weren't for Wanda, your face would be splattered against the floor. Jemma casts a glance at the heart monitor, and the value it reads makes your heart beat so fast you're afraid your chest might explode. She puts on your oxygen mask and then checks your vitals again.

Your pupils roll back, and as you fall helpless into Wanda's arms, the Sokovian panics a little.

"Hey, hey, detka wake up."

Wanda taps your cheeks but the only thing that changes is the further lowering of your heart rate.

"Jem, what's going on?" Daisy strokes your face, putting her hand on your chest to check your heart vibrations.

Jemma rummages through the drawers of the medical capsule and then, at the fifth drawer she ravages for something, she finally finds what she is looking for. In her hands she clutches a small glass case, inside which she glimpses a metal disk less than three centimeters in diameter and less than two centimeters thick.

As soon as she sees this, Bobbi cuts off your suit exposing your bare chest except for the three electrodes and the black bra you are wearing.

Jemma places the diskette on top of your left breast, just above your sternum, and presses the button above it. The disc blends in with your skin, being invisible to the human eye, and your body jerks, before your heartbeat returns to normal. The small jolt causes you to open your eyes and grimace in pain.

"What the hell-" you mutter, reaching out to massage your chest but Jemma stops you before you can.

"Hey, your heart rate was extremely low and I had to put a pacemaker on you. It's not invasive, Fitz designed one that blends in perfectly and doesn't give any problems whatsoever but you'll have to avoid EMPs but you can't take it off love, okay? I think the effort you put in was such that it damaged your heart, and without a peacemaker you could have another heart attack so until we find another solution and until we have done more tests, you can't use your powers."

You nod, squeezing your eyes shut as fatigue takes over.

"Rest now, we're here malyshka."

Natasha leaves a kiss in your hair while Daisy leaves one on your cheek. Jemma dims the lights to allow you to rest and Wanda lies next to you in the crib while Bobbi closes the glass curtains facing outward to give you all some privacy as you fall into dreamland surrounded by your girls.

You don't know it yet but one of those children you saved is going to become one of the best agents S.H.I.E.L.D. has ever had so maybe a slightly battered heart is worth it.

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. Leave like, comment and if you like support me on ko-fi. Have a great day!

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