#again some painful thoughts
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Grindeldore Headcanon #10(more of a 9.5)
Albus actually never loved lemon cake or lemon candies that much. He liked the taste. They were fine. But he was never that obsessed over them as Gellert thought he was.
But he always got so happy when Gellert brought him some. Not because it was lemon candy, but because Gellert brought it. He felt like the candies tasted better when Gellert was the one that got it for him.
So in time, he had grown to like lemon sweets more. He loved how something sour can be yet so sweet. He also loved how Gellert always had some for him. Just because he thought Albus loved them so much.
After that summer, lemon candies never tasted that good. But Albus started to like them more. Because then, he realised what he loved about the candies.
They tasted like loving Gellert.
Sour, yet sweet.
And eating them was just like remembering all the things they did together that summer. All his memories with Gellert.
Sweet,
And yet sour.
#idk why im doing this to myself#again some painful thoughts#but it's grindeldore so of course it's painful#grindeldore#albus dumbledore#gellert grindelwald#fantastic beasts#jamie campbell bower#the secrets of dumbledore#albus x gellert#mads mikkelsen#gelbus#harry potter
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alternate surface au inspired by a few ive seen around on tumblr :3
#my art#pressure roblox#roblox pressure#sebastian solace#painter pressure#thought more abt my headcanons for seb’s anatomy and like. lol that tail is not pure muscle hes got guts in there.#that + the fact that there’s spinal cord in there means itd be a bad idea to try and amputate it#the wagon/eventual wheelchair is mostly for outdoor use i imagine.#<- specificallt]y for outdoor surface textures/debris that’d be bad for him to slither on#also. chronic pain have i dont think suddenly shrinking his whole body did much good for that#i imagine he and painter have like. a pool. to help with that and other needs he has now.#but he wouldnt wanna use it for a long while#there was a sort of. disconnect between his idea of freedom from urbanshade vs the reality of it i think.#like. thinking things could. on some level. go back to normal#and not considering that some of his mutations would be irreversible#and having to confront/cope with/accomodate himself about that#seb wants to be normal again but we cant all get what we want can we!#sometimes healing involves working with or around irreversible change buddy!#btw if feligayzed sees this. hiii hii your au was one of the big things that kicked my brain off on this and i wanna make fanart sometime#oh yeah this is . also.#sebpainter#pressure pathways#pathways#wow i dont think ive written a wall of tags that big in a long time. can you tell im having normal feelings about them
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i'm sorry, siffrin. and thank you, loop.
#In Stars and Time#ISAT#ISAT Spoilers#ISAT Loop#ISAT Siffrin#illustration#digital art#fan art#the creativity process#portfolio#id in alt#yall thought i was done inflicting siffrinised loop pain? if you did YOU THOUGHT WRONG#also i made sif's different by removing the eyepatch since i wanted some variation#instead of just redrawing siffrin again#tw eye contact#cw eye contact
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creation meets creator in the most terrifying way possible (you wont believe what happens next)
#rainbsart#animation#shipwrecked 64#sw64#shipwrecked spoilers#shipwrecked64#broadside beach#shipwrecked fanart#bucky beaver#rex broadside#kinda#blot the rabbit#cw flashing#ask to tag idk#i spent all day on this lol it was only supposed to be rex spawning in but i got a little silly#animating in ibis is next level pain im never doing it like this again#lmao#i always thought the way rex/blot spawns in is so cool#idk smth about it#i hope i did it justice here bc the first draft of some of it was. hoo
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Sometimes I feel like celiac disease doesn't actually count as a disability since it's so easy and stress free compared to deadly allergies, but then I remember that I have to meticulously plan every trip I go to and play 4D chess with uni campus restaurant menus and for a brief moment there was genuine consideration if I should be put on growth hormones because I was so small from not getting enough nutrients
#...but then again its so easy. its no deadly nut allergy or diabetes#but then again i cant go to some countries?????#but then again i dont even have to take like medication and im not in pain constantly#but then again i was so pale and small before they found my celiac. there was no growth in my body and i shouldve been taller#but i wont DIE if i ingest gluten#but i would have a landslide's amount of other symptoms if i did ingest gluten regularly to this day#but its really just a stomach ache its nothing#but the food is more expensive and that really adds up in the long run when theres no welfare for celiac from the government#but its so accessible nowadays its like theres no issue at all#but... i have been told people feel sorry for me#but its so easy! it doesnt really count.#not fish#complicated thoughts about a lifelong autoimmune disorder is all
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Bonus:
#criticalroleedit#critteredit#critical role#keyleth of the air ashari#vax’ildan#vaxleth#c1e115 1h33m27s#c3e51 4h4m16s#mgifs#ngl this is not how I thought their reunion would go#but then again this is like On Brand for vaxleth so yeh#anyway here's some Pain. enjoy
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I just finished Dead Boy Detectives and I'm low-key disappointed in the fandom for not mentioning
"Are you always a woman"
"Yes"
I MEAN EDWIN?? WHERE ARE THE FRICKING HEADCANONS????
#just the fact that this was an actual scene#makes me think that they will bring ot up again in#season 2#it gotta have atleast some importance?#atleast i thought that we would get some headcanons!#but nooo#hopefully we just have to give the fansom some time tho#it's all still very new yk#dbd#dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives agency#edwin paine#edwin payne
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At home in the shadows. Forgotten dreams.
Solas: Dragon age
Ink on paper
#I just wanted to paint our favorite sad elf#Who doens't cry a bit when you hear Solas thoughts through Cole??? It broke by heart#He hurts#an old pain from before#when everything sang the same. You're real#and it means everyone could be real. It changes everything#but it can't.#ughhjejnfkjeewf#sad egg#look at this pretty ancient elvhen baby#yes he made some questionable life choices but who hasn't? ha ha#I like my favourite character to carry a load of angst and unprocessed trauma on their backs just like the rest of us <3#dragon age inquisition#my fanart#dai#dragon age#again#dragon age: dreadwolf#dread wolf rises#solasmance#fen'harel#the dread wolf#original art#dragon age fanart#dragon age portraits#solavellan#solas#traditional illustration#traditional painting#illutration
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I’m curious about the onesie now
also @pizzaplex-stargazer cuz you noticed too!
here's what Moon was rocking before Clip started making clothes:
after their PizzaPlex went under, the DCA bois had to figure out a lot of things, one being: clothes. unfortunately, Moon's really big, so he struggled to find things that fit him and were comfortable. the onesie is the first thing he found that fit him and made him feel really cozy. so he still wears it at home (he prefers comfy clothes at home anyways) when he needs a pick-me-up.
of course, he can't work at the salon in a bunny onesie, so here's what Clip made him (under Sundrop's direction):
Moon does prefer comfy clothes, but he has to admit, sometimes he likes the attention these clothes get him. he's iffy about them though, he feels that they show too much of him and he prefers the specific kind of comfort that comes from being an amorphous bundle of coziness.
#fnaf moon#fnaf sun#fnaf dca#dca fandom#New Do Same You AU#Moon New Do Same You AU#Sun New Do Same You AU#this AU is full of silly and angst i swear#look Moon in a rabbit onesie! (:#he likes it because it hides his body and he can momentarily forget that he was forced into a body that isn't his ):#he can be a silly little gremlin again (:#and not think about what he looks like under the fabric ):#the bunny onesie was honestly just a silly idea i had early on even before i thought of Moon's body upgrades#i just thought it would be in-character for Moon to like comfy clothes and would wear comfy clothes when he's not out in public#but i was worried the bunny onesie would be too silly?#but after chatting with friends about it#i just#i had to keep it in#look at how happy Moon is!#he's a little moon bunny!#let him have some joy#i've wrote a painful backstory for him anyway let him have this#traditional art#crab art#bright colours#ask the crab
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umm i guess im treating this like an au now ahah
pmd2 darkrai hasn't had time to figure out wtf is going on (he's been here for like an hour tops). he's lost his composure immediately lol
#this is stupid hgsdjgs#cresselia is a PAIN to draw btw#too many smooth shapes aaaa#anyway. i like to think the pmd series is its own universe with only one darkrai and cresselia there. and they hate each other's guts#so pmd2 darkrai got chucked into a different universe. where that darkrai and cresselia are more chill w each other#(which seems to be the case in the games and anime.. sometimes?)#pmd2 darkrai is BAFFLED that they aren't mortal enemies here lol he's so expecting to get beat up all over again#he would be running away so fast if he weren't being dragged by the hair hgfhdsfkjg#i didnt put much thought into how this would even work i just thought it was funny and ran with it LOL#pmd2 darkrai probably woke up saw another him and went 'ah yes i must be in the past now there's two of me to work together'#talking like 'haha this is perfect let us combine our might to plunge this world into darkness' or some shit#and the other darkrai just. stares. says to themself 'yeah im too tired for this shit im taking this weirdo to cresselia' LOL#pokemon#darkrai#pmd darkrai#cresselia#two darkrais au#pmd au
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Thinking of vlr Akane is so conflicting cuz on one hand I’m so upset that she doesn’t ever get a moment to just rest and enjoy being alive again I’m upset that she just gets deeper and deeper into this role she’s built for herself and she loses her humanity and will never ever be that girl who died in the incinerator. But on the other hand, I need her to get so, so much worse I need her to be so obsessed with perfection she has this unique ability to change the course of history and she will burn everything and everyone to the ground in the blink of an eye if it means she can "reset" and get a perfect timeline and I desperately need her to never be satisfied with anything because really, is there anything that’s worth all the damage she’s caused?
#zero escape#akane kurashiki#virtues last reward#yeahhhhh just having so many thoughts about akane and sigma and junpei and yeah im screaming eyes bloodshot#i want akane to just like post 999 just do silly shit with aoi get a cat be a gamer try to heal the best she can#and i want her to be so evil i think theres still some crimes she hasnt committed yet she should do those#i really really really want her and junpei to just beat the shit out of each other in a boxing ring. specifically post vlr#need them being old as shit throwing chairs everyone is cheering#and damn like vlr akane just cant agree with junpei on his philosophy that a life with pain is still a life worth living cuz then thatd mean#everything she did in 999 was all for naught like to accept even the bad timelines where she died as valuable...#thats a kick to the dick especially when she fought so hard to live and how her death was so unfair#except she was just a scared kid with no choice then. now whats her excuse#i just want it to be possible you know? possible that akane didnt need to do this and she couldve been happy#cuz yeah the trauma would be horrible but surely itd be better than the trauma she has now since she took that dive#i wonder if she knows that no matter what she does she’ll never erase her trauma and eventually she will have to face it#or if she actually believes she can figure it all out and win the perfect timeline and magical mental stability will happen#basically akane is avoiding therapy soooooo hard but then again who would even be her therapist#no one can possibly understand her...right?
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I chuckle seeing how sometimes Yuji be punching Sukuna back into walls, bringing him to the ground on his knees or back, etc, like Sukuna's big ass weigh nothing.
And I wouldn't even say this is just him using cursed energy. Nah, that is that raw strength.
#same kid who punched through and broke concrete from a jump#same kid who throw things 5+ times his size#a door? he's gonna 'some... BODY' it#YOU'RE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE#i can see why sukuna got pissed#bro eager to fight yuta again because yuji was throwing him around like a ragdoll#embarrassing~#*sighs* their dynamic is just so entertaining#painful but entertaining#just kiya's thoughts#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk manga spoilers#jjk spoilers#yuji itadori#itadori yuji#yuuji itadori#itadori yuuji#sukuna#ryomen sukuna#sukuna ryomen#ryoumen sukuna#sukuna ryoumen
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[PUT INTO PLACE, TIED DOWN AND ARRANGED, AND IS NEVER THE SAME, AGAIN.]<-listen to my favorite songs. VAMPIRES ARE WONDERFUL ARENT THEY. THE FLESH IS SO MUCH MORE DURABLE. SO MUCH STRETCHIER THAN HUMANS. THE STRESS DOESNT KILL A VAMPIRE THE SAME WAY IT DOES A HUMAN. YOU CAN TAKE THEM APART THREAD BY THREAD AND LEAVE THEM WIDE AWAKE WITHOUT WORRY OF THE BRAINMATTER SPOILING UNDER VINEGARY AGONY.
#cw gore#WEEEE WHIPPING OUT ALL MY BELOVED PIXEL HORROR GAME SOUNDTRACKS FOR THIS ONE#STILL A WIP#SORTA. FORKSFORKSFORKS INSPIRED ME TO START WORKIN AT IT AGAIN. AND NOW IT LIVES. IT LIIIVEESS!!!#MOSLT.Y ATLEAST. I MIGHT MESS W IT MORE LATER. WE SHALL SEE. ANYWAY GABRIEL MONTEZ HUH. WOW POOR GUY#THERES A FASCINATING FEELING THAT COMES WITH BEING ON A OPERATING TABLE.AND BEING IN IMMENSE PAIN#ONE OF MY FONDEST MEMORIES IS LAYING ON A DENTIST CHAIR. SHAKING AND INVOLUNTARILY CRYING AFTER MANY MANY#NEEDLES TO MY THE MOUTH. I METABOLIZE THE NUMBING STUFF QUICKLY APPARENTLY. THEY NEEDED ALOT OF NUMBING SHOTS#BUT I WASNT AFRAID OR DISTRESSED. THE DENTIST WAS VERYVERY NICE AND ALSO UH. PRETTY. BUT THATS BESIDE THE POINT#THE POINT IS. THAT IT WAS FASCINATING TO REALIZE MY PHYSICAL RESPONSE TO PAIN UNDER A CONTROLLED ENVIRONMENT#I DIDNT KNOW HOW EASY IT WAS TO SHAKE AND TO CRY PRYVIOUS TO THAT EXPERIENCE.MY DENTAL ADVENTURES CONTINUE#THEY CONTINUE TO HELP ME UNDERSTAND WHAT ITS LIKE FOR PAIN TO BOIL AWAY THE TIME. TO DISTORT THE PASSING HOURS AND CONSUME EVERY THOUGHT#DO YOU REMEMBER PAIN? THE MOST SEVERE PAIN IN YOUR LIFE? NOW WILL YOU IMAGINE RED LIGHTS? RED LIGHTS AND SHIFTING FIGURES#NOW WILL YOU IMAGINE PAIN UNRELENTING.PAIN WORLD SHATTERING.PAIN IMMORTAL.CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING PULLED APART#THE HUMAN MIND CAN ONLY WITHSTAND SO MUCH PAIN BEFORE IT SHUTS DOWN AND HIDES.IT NEEDS TO PROTECT ITSELF AFTERALL. PAIN CAN ALTER#PAIN SHIFTS THE CHEMISTY OF THE MIND OF THE FLESH OF THE SOUL. FOR HUMANS ATLEAST. BUT YOU ARE NO LONGER HUMAN#YOU CHOSE OTHERWISE DIDNT YOU BOY.BECAUSE YOU WANTED MORE.STATUS.POWER.APPROVAL.SECURITY.SAFET.Y.#OHHH YOU CAN WITHSTAND THE PAIN FOR THAT. FOR ALL THAT. YOU WERENT TOLD THERE WOULD BE PAIN BUT YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WERE PROMISED.#ITS ALL WORTH IT IN THE END. NOW LETS JUST HOPE SOME BLONDE TWERP DOESNT PROVE TO BE STRONGER THAN THE STRONGEST PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE#LETS HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. LETS HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. I LOST MY TRAIN O THOUGHT#anyway dawww poorr gabeee that shit probably huuurrrrtttss but so much time has passed that your body got tired of screaming and squirming#why havnt you passed out yet? maybe you might as well have at this point. like sleeping with your eyes open and your nerves awake#OH HEY FUNFACT ABT THE ART. I FOUGHT W IT ALOT. TOOK A LONG WHILE FOR ME TO BE REMOTELY HAPPY W THIS.#i was thinking abt pixel horror video games when i made it.just as i do with all great things ofc ofc#i love you pixel horror game i love yooouuuuu.i struggled so much w the colors for so LONNGG UHGHGHGH but im finally happy...im finally fre
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The mention of college gave a new direction to Gilbert’s thoughts, and they talked for a time of their plans and wishes . . . gravely, earnestly, hopefully, as youth loves to talk, while the future is yet an untrodden path full of wonderful possibilities.
Gilbert had finally made up his mind that he was going to be a doctor.
“It’s a splendid profession,” he said enthusiastically. “A fellow has to fight something all through life . . . didn’t somebody once define man as a fighting animal? . . . and I want to fight disease and pain and ignorance . . . which are all members one of another. I want to do my share of honest, real work in the world, Anne . . . add a little to the sum of human knowledge that all the good men have been accumulating since it began. The folks who lived before me have done so much for me that I want to show my gratitude by doing something for the folks who will live after me. It seems to me that is the only way a fellow can get square with his obligations to the race.”
“I’d like to add some beauty to life,” said Anne dreamily. “I don’t exactly want to make people know more . . . though I know that is the noblest ambition . . . but I’d love to make them have a pleasanter time because of me . . . to have some little joy or happy thought that would never have existed if I hadn’t been born.”
“I think you’re fulfilling that ambition every day,” said Gilbert admiringly.
And he was right. Anne was one of the children of light by birthright. After she had passed through a life with a smile or a word thrown across it like a gleam of sunshine the owner of that life saw it, for the time being at least, as hopeful and lovely and of good report.
#anne of the island#so old fashioned#rivals to lovers#and I want to fight disease and pain and ignorance#oh to be 17 again#to have some little joy or happy thought that would never have existed if I hadn’t been born#smitten Gilbert#Finally Gilbert rose regretfully.#“I think you’re fulfilling that ambition every day” said Gilbert admiringly.
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I know everyone loves talking about Katniss and Peeta being affectionate in everyday life and mirroring her parents, but I also go crazy about them being affectionate and Peeta realizing he has a safe home filled with love unlike his parents. I just imagine him remembering his parents just tensely being with each other and contrasting that with him and Katniss who are always touching in some way and greet each other with kisses and hugs.
no because throughout the first two books he’s so physically affectionate to her (even though i’d assume this isn’t learned behaviour from his home) can you IMAGINE what it’s like when they’re safe and living together and in an established relationship? when he realises that she enjoys and takes comfort from his affections??
#anon you sent this ask TIME ago so i hope you’re still around#i’ve been having some thoughts recently about peeta healing from his childhood pain which i think a lot of the time is overlooked#more so because of the hijacking and that kind of takes over as. yknow. trauma numero uno. #and i also had an idea for a story like this but i’ve never written before so that will probably never come to be#even though the urge is there#but 1000 times yes to them having a home filled with love and affection#everlark headcanons#asks#you know he kisses her goodbye every time they have to part and greets her again with a kiss too.
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okay prepare yourselves this will be embarrassingly sincere but i'm actually not finished talking about the reunion scene and everything i love about it. i love that it's the first real and honest conversation louis and lestat have ever had on screen. i love that it's raw and painful and unjudging. i love that louis allows himself to express the pain he feels around his suicide attempt for the first time. i love that it's about many things but above all it's about how they both failed claudia. about how they both carry her with them and are the only ones who can understand. i love siri pause. i love that louis thanks lestat for the gift, that it's more meaningful to both of them than a love confession could have ever been. i love that there's no love confession. i love that louis is the one who closes the gap between them and i love that it's in response to lestat expressing shame and regret over how he failed to be a good father to claudia. i love that that's what louis needed to hear from him more than anything, more than the apology for dropping him from the sky or for how he treated him. i love that louis owns up to the way he behaved during the relationship not because i think lestat necessarily deserves that from him but because it's an important healing moment for louis himself. i love that louis is soft with lestat and that he's the one talking to him and comforting him at the end when we can't hear them, a true role reversal from the turning scene in the pilot. i love that they don't get back together. i love that the world is being destroyed outside the house and that it starts to fall apart around them because that is what their love is, destructive and painful but true. i love that this is how we leave them, not knowing what the future will look like for them. i love that louis gets to choose to reunite with lestat on his own terms. and most of all. most of all. i love that lestat looks like a wet miserable pathetic rat with an unwashed greasy bob. and that his honkers are out
#iwtv#iwtv spoilers#loustat#interview with the vampire#scene of all time truly they have invented love and it's awful#anyway sorry for being cringe shipping loustat like i'm 14 again. i'm surprised by this also#like i really thought this was a classy party but as i've said before my heart is simply not made of stone#when the pain and love show is about pain and love and painful love?? and i'm shocked by this for some reason ??#anyway stream lestat's insanely slutty low cut tank top dirty robe & horrible bob look#peace#one last thing. if this post gets zero notes i don't CARE i NEEDED to say this#my posts#iwtv meta
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