#again i apologize for setting it deep in the caves! but between his strong fear aura and general :\

[sureihsan]

who: @mercy-grigoryan what: ihsan is eldritch!ihsan now and he's... 'eh' about that where: somewhere deep in the caves... im sorry for forcing u there mercy but he would be nowhere else rn!

" stop. " his presence was bound to be overwhelming by now, a horror so unintentionally strong that... well, it had killed many a man before. he tried to tame his own aura -- his own presence -- though that was always far easier to say think than to do. " if you must continue, you may now pass through. i advise you be quick about it. "

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

Scattered AU Masterpost Part 1

This is a collection of all material associated with the Scattered AU (read about the premise here)!

Join the new Discord server here

AU material under the cut (because this is growing super fast already)

Due to post length limit (which is apparently a thing), find Part 2 of this AU here.

A few ideas to get us started:

- Tango and Zedaph spawned relatively close to each other, but they haven't found each other yet and each think they are alone. They keep just barely missing each other in their exploration of the area. Maybe, with the powers of Zed's perfect sense of direction and Tango's laser-sharp perception skills, they'll finally stop walking circles around each other...maybe.

- Xisuma spawned alone, deep underground in a massive, confusing cave system. He desperately wants to figure out what's going on and how to fix it, but a bad run-in with the Warden damaged his helmet, leaving him unable to use admin commands.

- Mumbo spawned the farthest out of anyone, right next to a woodland mansion. He quickly realized that hoping to stumble across another person this far out is a lost cause, so he's trying to create some form of communication using a combination of redstone and Evoker magic. The Evoker isn't very helpful, and it isn't going well.

- Joe and Vintagebeef were the only ones to successfully spawn at spawn. They aren't really sure what's going on, but they've decided to build a small village as a base of operations while they figure it out (and to signal signs of life to anyone who might successfully find their way back)

- Cleo spawned in a village, and is currently hiding out in a house while trying to convince the villagers to trust her. Let's just say they aren't thrilled to have a zombie in their midst (and the iron golem is even less pleased)

- Impulse had the misfortune to spawn in a guardian temple. Between the guardians and the constant threat of drowning, he's been in a death loop since the world started.

- False and Stress spawned right next to each other. They figured out pretty early that something was wrong with regen, and using their combined strengths, they made it to the Nether to get ingredients for healing potions. They are now on a mission to find the others and distribute the potions to whoever needs them.

- Ren actually managed to travel a good distance back to the world center, before getting pretty badly injured. With no regen, and knowing he'll have to start the journey all over if he dies and respawns, he's decided to pull together a small base and take shelter while he waits to be found.

- Scar spawned on an outer End island, with no idea how to get back to the Overworld. He keeps finding strange glitches in his surroundings, and he swears he can hear soft Vex laughter whenever he turns his back...

- Keralis spawned in the Nether, and he is absolutely terrified.

That's all I have for ideas so far. The location of the others (and what happens next) is up to you!

Contributions so far:

- Bdubs spawns in the void, but he just doesn’t die. Maybe it’s spawn protection, maybe it’s the glitches, but he just keeps falling and falling and falling further from the bedrock, unable to do anything to help himself as he descends further into the void

- @fluffy-papaya

- After wandering around aimlessly for days or maybe weeks, Tango finds an automatic farm for... well... he's not sure, exactly. But he does know who built it- it's got Zedaph's mark all over it. So he stays there, fixing broken Redstone, trying to figure out what it does. And when Zedaph returns to collect melons (so that's what this thing is for), he finds Tango waiting for him.

- @rayveewrites

- Etho spawns in a underwater cave, but there is air in it and for some reason a shipwreck so he can get some wood and tools. But he has to get out to contact anyone because the reception in caves don't happen to be the best, little does he know just outside the cave is the monument where Impulse is, they're so close yet so far from one another

- anonymous

- Maybe Etho ended up spawning at the very top of a mountain, he could see far from up there and has a general idea of where he is, but no idea how to get down as all around him is powderd snow hiding ravines, and cliffs. . . And a few goats that Etho has narowly avoided getting headbutted by. (Etho went to the mountain after escaping the cave)

- @ciaravixen

- Welsknight spawned in the Nether

- (paraphrased) Ren fell down a ravine in the mountains on his journey to the world center, and decided to make a small cabin base rather than try to carry on injured. Doc spawned in those same mountains, and may find him eventually.

- anonymous

- Grian spawns on the tallest peak of the highest mountain. Surrounded by thick fog and almost ever-falling snow, with crevasses and cliffs that drops thousands of blocks to the ground around every corner. No trees, no life, and barely enough air to breath. It's so cold. A thin red sweater isn't nearly enough to keep him warm.... he's likely caught in a death loop for quite awhile as he refreeze over, and over, and over again. And when he does manage to climb down, an ice pillager lies in wait...

- @therainofsweetmelody

- Scar’s End spawn is on a single island- he can see other islands around him, but they’re just out of jump reach- he tried, and fell and died, and respawned back onto his little island with the whispering voices around him a tad louder, and the islands just a bit farther away. He stops trying to jump to them eventually, out of fear they’ll vanish and he won’t have anything to focus on besides the whisper of ice cold hands and wings on his skin

- anonymous

- Oh! Maybe since Xisuma’s admin helmet is broken and he’s unable to run any world commands, that means mob hermits like Cleo, Doc, and Jevin aren’t quite the same. Maybe Cleo locked herself in that house for the villagers protection as much as her own. Maybe Doc eventually joins a lone creeper pack. Who knows! -💧

- anonymous

- Zed and Tango spawned in the same jungle biome, explaining the melon farm and why they could be literally three blocks from each other and still not be aware of each other’s existence. -🟣

- The first thing Scar does once he first spawns in (besides from almost having a panic attack) is take a jump into the void. This of course does nothing. He checks out the rest of the end islands around him, and finds a rather large end city just in render distance. There should be treasure or something that could help him survive, right? -🟣

- Keralis was lucky enough to spawn in a warped forest biome and next to a basalt delta, so he’s got wood and stone. It takes a bit, but he gets full gold armor and finds his way to a nether fortress. He figures with the broken regen that the other hermits will try to go for potions. Maybe he finds Stress and False, maybe not. -🟣

- I apologize if I'm sending too many asks, please feel free to say if so! I'm just already so invested in this idea, and absolutely love where it's all going! Shattered au brainrot go brrrrr - anyways; Cub spawns in a valley within the messa. To one side an abandoned village covers the cliff, and to the other, mines drill deep into the rock. A stream luckily runs through the valley, though it's slowly drying up. He can hear strange sounds in the mines, and feels something in the village watching

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- what if the hermits caught in death loops start gaining scars and marks from all their deaths? like impulse had permanent scars from the guardians and grian’s hands are permanently blue from freezing to death all the time

- anonymous

- X finds some axoloyls in a lush cave and falls in love. He gets some wood from said cave and gets some buckets so he can keep them -🟣

- Cleo gets stuck in a death loop with the iron golem, who is blind to her not attacking the villagers. One of the smarter villagers realizes she’s not fighting back, and calls the golem off. -🟣

- (paraphrased) After the iron golem is called off, Stress and False find Cleo badly hurt in the village house. They make sure she's comfortable and safe before going to the Nether to get potions, where they find a battered Keralis and carry him back. They turn the house into a little hospital while they brew potions and take care of Cleo and Keralis until they're strong enough to move on.

- anonymous

- Stress and False have set up a Nether Portal near a Nether Fortress, for easy escape to the relative safety of the Overworld. Keralis has never been more relieved in his life than when he found that portal.

- @/rayveewrites

- Doc spawned a thousand blocks away from ren, not knowing hos friend was there he happened to go in that direction. He managed to get materials, tools and food for himself before he sees rens little hut

- anonymous

- Jevin was one of the luckier hermits, when it came to where he spawned. He woke up in the shallow green waters of a floral cave, illuminated by glowing rocks and berries. He wasn't... quite alone. Although no other hermits could be seen, he quickly found a small family of axolotl living in the closed-off cave. They became his companions as he tried to assess his situation, and served as comfort when he realised his communicator was almost useless. Being slime, the environment was very welcoming

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- Xb spawns in the middle of a desert, with not even a village in sight. While he's used to being in distant lands with limited resources, he's very much not used to it on the Hermitcraft server with limited contact to the others. As the nights go by and the sands grow more hostile thanks to never-burning husks, he grows more and more lonely.

-@/basaltdragon

- At first, Doc is elated when he spawns on a mountain surrounded by goats. That is, until he discovers that none of his fellow hermits are there with him. After being headbutted down the mountain into the snowy tundra below and left on precariously low health, he hunkers down in a nearby igloo. But it's not exactly easy in a food-scarce biome when his only contacts are two villagers and the horde of strays that gather outside each night...

-@crows-in-space

- in one sense of the word, scar is safe. There's enough chorus fruit on the island to keep him alive, and despite his concerns the enderman don't even bat an eye at him. Theoretically, he could survive for longer than many of the others. But the whispers keep nagging at him, pushing him closer and closer to the edge. Sure, he could survive, but how long could he stay on this deathly quiet piece of land before someone would find him? He can see the faint outline of an End City on one of the fading islands, and every passing moment it haunts him. If he could just give in for a moment, let the powers of the vex harness his body for just a few seconds, maybe he could make it over and gather some gear- maybe even an elytra- and then he'd be set. But fear and logic talk him out of it. He's made deals with the vex before, and that quick trip across the islands could put him in a much more dangerous position than only being stranded...

- @/crows-in-space

- What if after scar gives up, he finds his vex mask lying on the floor with a tag saying ‘do it, it’ll help you get across’ (shade's note: Scar does it)

- anonymous

- For the Scattered AU: Scar gets an elytra, and after much internal struggling he decides to take a chance and leap into the darkness for hope of finding another island. During his terrifying glide he hears a distant scream from the void that is so familiar, but he can't quite place it, and he's in no hurry to risk flying any lower to check it out. - M

- @petrichormeraki

- Iskall and doc's robotic eye glitch out so they don't have any depth vision, so no mater where they spawn, they Are bound to die a few times from missinterprating how far away an Arrow or trident is, and how fast something is coming at them.

- @/ciaravixen

- I initially thought of this for Ren, but since there was already an idea for him, it could probably work for Iskall instead; He spawns in the middle of a scorching desert. Dunes of sand for as far as the eye can see, with barely a cactus or dead Bush in between. No water, no life - only the ever-present heat of the sweltering sun, and the large skeletons everywhere. He manages to find an abandoned temple after days of dragging himself through the sand, and spies a desert village on the horizon

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- Scattered AU! The way the "not killing Bdubs in his own spawn in the void" glitches work is similar to the forgiving void mod works where when you hit the bottom of the void you are teleported to the top instead of taking damage, but since Bdubs can't see anything in the void he doesn't know this (beyond a constant falling) feeling until he manages to "fall forward" enough to find some end islands, he finds scar this way but is so excited to see him he died from fall damage right in front of him

- @theclockworkowl

- (Scattered AU) Piggybacking off the death loop scars ask, when/if Bdubs is rescued from the void, he's in ROUGH shape. His external limbs are blackened and freezing with frostbite from the void (voidbite?), and his bones are permanently weakened from his form being subjected to the cold abyss for so long. Bdubs needs to relearn gravity after falling for so long, and doesn't use elytra anymore. The solid ground under his feet is something he'll never sacrifice for convenience ever again. - M

- @/petrichomeraki

- Wels spawned in a giant crimson forest in the nether. Towering mushroom trees, thick red vines, with piglins and hoglins he constantly has to run away from. But he finds something.... interesting as he's exploring. A house has been built into a wall, a mixture of nether and overworld blocks. Stepping inside, someone clearly lives there - someone who's not a piglin. Imagine his surprise (and relief) when a certain familair knight walks through the door. "Helsknight?"

-@/therainofsweetmelody

- xB wakes up in a dripstone cavern. It's damp and cold and the spikes are very tall, forming a sort of natural cage around him. At the very least, zombies and mobs can't get through, but the longer he stays there, the weirder the sounds get. There... wasn't a new mob for the dripstone caves, right? Right? (i'm trying VERY hard not to do new hermit OR crossover headcanons for scattered au. i swear) ~@betweenlands

- Scattered AU! Everyone Etho dies He spawns in a new place, first it was the underwater cave, then it was the top of a mountain, but it wasn't until he spawned inside an ocean monument and saw impulse trying to escape just as he was dying he realise the importance of the pattern, He was cycling though each of the other hermits spawn locations, which made all the wierd almost hermit made wierdnes make sense, the underwater one was his but the mountain was Grian's spawn spot,

- @/theclockworkowl

- Can the hermits see death messages? (They can) I'm imagining the potential angst of that, where normal world messages (achievements, commands, deaths) go through just fine but the others can't chat. The helplessness of watching their friends' names endlessly filling the chat and having no idea where they are, having no clue how to help, not even being able to offer comfort.

- @/basaltdragon

- Someone had mentioned xisuma also ending up in a floral cavern with axolotl, right? What if this was the same cave Jevin found himself stuck in? After days and days of clawing at stone, xisuma finally breaks into a cavern filled with faint light. After discovering the friendly acolotls, he notices a strange blue mass floating in the water.... and is almost startled to death when he sees the skull faintly showing through the slime, and the familiar wobbly voice coming from it. "Xisuma?"

- Doc and Grian (and later on, ren) spawned on the same mountain. Grian, of course, at the very top: stuck in the endless snowpeak, towering high above the clouds. Doc, meanwhile, ended up at the base, surrounded by snow and goats and giant taiga trees as far as the eye could see. Once Ren got stuck in the ravine, he often heard a familiar scream before a sickening splat every now and again, as the ravine lies almost completely below the highest peak. He's afraid to check his communicator.

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- grian’s practically given up since there’s not much for him to do. there’s no food and his hands are too frozen to mine. a little fox stays by his side at least. he’s about to freeze again and his health is low and he hears crumching footsteps approaching. he assumes its the iceologer coming for him but instead he hears “grian?” and he can make out blurry figures before he passes out and wakes up wrapped up in a blanket infromt of a fire. (whoevers managed to find and rescue him is up to you :D) (Shade's notes: the person who found him was Doc, and he took him back to Ren's cabin to warm up)

- anonymous

- Scar isn't the only one changed by the time he reaches spawn. Impulse drags himself up onto land finally, breathing heavily, and there's something different about him. Sharper teeth. The shadow he casts more inconsistent. Always faintly smells like saltwater. And his eyes glow faintly, a pale washed-out non-color like light at the bottom of the ocean. Something suggesting nonhuman geometry. Something sleeping that had to reawaken to escape. ~@betweenlands

- Eventually, Etho spawns in a jungle. By a complete stroke of luck, he sees the smoke of a campfire. Tango and Zedaph are happy to see someone- anyone- else. Especially when it turns out Etho somehow managed to get the coordinates of a certain Ocean Temple. Sure, it's far, but they can make it. After all, there's an 'I' in team ZIT, and they aren't leaving him behind.

- @/rayveewrites

- (summary of a couple different writing peices) After escaping the Guardian Temple, Impulse set out to find any other Hermit he could. He has gained some unnerving qualities and abilities that he doesn't really understand, but he's trying not to think about that right now. After defeating several mobs he should not have been able to defeat with his level of progress, he now possesses one Totem of Undying. He met up with Zedaph, Tango, and Etho on their way to find him. They are now hosting him at their campsite and are glad he is safe, but Etho is unnerved and suspicious of his more unsettling attributes.

- I had sent this idea right after the inbox closed, rip. But anyways - what if mumbo ended up befriending the evokers and pilligers in the woodland mansion? Of course, it wouldnt be like that at first- the constant death to the axes and swords and magic, the growls and yelling and cursed glares. But he always came back to work on the redstone and evoker magic in a desperate attempt to contact the others. Eventually, the evoker stops sending their vex, and the pilligers stop swinging their weapons

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- (Scattered AU) After Scar gives in to the Vex. Bdubs is barely conscious to begin with; dying to the void so many times really took it out of him in every way possible. But when he is awake, what he sees makes him scared. Scar with faded, cold eyes. Scar with transparent wings, gone in a blink. Scar being able to do things he shouldn't. Scar says it's to get them out of there, but every day he gets a little paler, a little colder, and Bdubs grows more worried. - M

- @/petrichomeraki

- Perhaps xb and Iskall are on opposite ends of the same desert? On one side, high sand dunes covering miles, with a single desert temple and isolated desert village hidden amongst the cliffs and hills. On the other, the deep flatt valley next to a Mesa mountain, flat nothingness stretching far past the horizon. It would still take quite a long time for them to find each other, but at least there's a change they could meet... and, perhaps, over that mountain, cub could be somewhere in the mesa

-@/therainofsweetmelody

- Iskall and Xb eventually find each other in the desert. Sunburned, dehydrated, and sand-blasted, they hug when they first meet despite not knowing each other well. And they try their best not to die, because what are the chances they'll ever find each other again? Two heads are better than one for finding their way to the rest of the hermits.

-@/basaltdragon

- Its probably a week or so of falling before bdubs managed to move enough to finally see the end islands just barely rendering in the distance. As someone had mentioned, perhaps he became so hopeful that he missed his mark, hitting the ground with a sickening splat just blocks beside scar. It took bdubs almost another week to get forward enough to see the islands again. This time, he landed right on scar... sending the vex back to his spawn several islands away, and leaving bdubs alone for days

-@/therainofsweetmelody

- While Bdubs and Scar are more than happy to have found each other again, their moments together are tense and filled with gaps of uncomfortable silence. There's an unspoken agreement hanging over them: Scar doesn't question Bdubs' frozen and frail state, and Bdubs pretends not to notice how Scar's skin has gotten pale and ghost-like, or how he glances behind him often, like he's being followed by a shadow only he can see. Though of course, Bdubs does notice. The whole server does. Grian wakes up in a cold sweat from a dream of Scar's ruthless attempts to destroy the mycelium resistance. Cub feels his own ties to the vex magic acting up once again, now worrying more than ever what Scar may have encountered in this broken world. Even Mumbo's evoker friend begins acting different, though Mumbo can't seem to determine whether it's out of excitement or fear...

-@/crows-in-space

- Scattered AU After the Wels meeting Hels Headcanon I imagine maybe Hels offers a deal to insure his safety on the Hermitcraft Server in exchange for Wels safety in the Nether. Wels very reluctantly agrees adding to the deal that Hels won’t hurt anyone. To bad he didn’t notice his Evil counterpart cross his fingers while shaking on it.

- anonymous

- Scattered AU:  TFC spawns on the main end island, dragon and all. With out proper preparation he’s been stuck in a death loop since the world’s start. Sometimes, right before he dies, he wishes that the janky respon would de-age his body; he’s not the agile young man who could take down the dragon solo anymore.

- @liagrace-b

- Scattered!Grian can’t fly. His normal down-featherly wings look like every feather has been plucked off, leaving the very sensitive skin open to the elements. But the world’s code itself has altered the physics of the wings themselfs. Grian can feel how much heavier the wing structure sits on his back, meaning that they couldn’t let him glide even if fully feathered. Poor Grian hasn’t survived the freezing cold long enough to know if his feathers would grow back with enough time.

- anonymous

- EX somehow gets into the scattered mix. Spawning in the Deep Dark, the exiled admin is terrified, and will stop at nothing to find his brother. 🌙

- (Scattered AU) Scar and Bdubs, after months(?) of travel, make it to the Ender Dragon's island. Bdubs is scared for both of their lives; he is in no condition to fight, he can't even STAND, and he's so, so afraid to die and be condemned to falling forever in the void once again. Scar says nothing, only gently setting his friend down behind an obsidian pillar before his skin goes completely translucent, his eyes clouding white. (Paraphrased: Scar defeats the dragon, him and Bdubs meet up with TFC)

- @/petrichormeraki

- the plugins do not work, so singleplayer sleep is out. Beds do reset spawn point, so the Hermits who spawned in a place where they can get them would do well to make several and use them as checkpoints along their journey (and hope that they don't get broken, especially for those who had to escape death loops....)

- (my answer to some questions)

- Those trapped in death loops change, adapting until they aren't harmed anymore or till they escape. After all, what are players if not adaptable?

- @permafrost782

- Xisuma blames his broken helmet for being unable to admin, as some sort of comfort. But there is no comfort there. The truth is, not even Joe, Tango, Cub, or Hypno can access the chat, can even begin to run commands to fix what has gone wrong. If they could, they would have teleported everyone to 0,0 and reset the worldspawn. Those partnered with any of the admins feel a certain kind of hopelessness. Those without feel a different kind of hopeless.

- @/basaltdragon

- To add to the scattered AU: Though i had seen someone explain the void connecting to the end so Bdubs gets out of that fall, i had the thought of this; What if eventually the void loops around with the overworld's sky, so he's basically in a continuous loop if falling to his death and respawning in the void until he finally is lucky enough in his falls to get over water and live. After that he just has to stay alive otherwise he returns to the void..

-@aetosofvalla

- Somewhere, in the back of Scar’s vex-addled mind, there’s the worry of Jellie. Where is she? Is she with another hermit? Did she spawn in with another village again and will he have to find her again? -🟣

- (Scattered AU) Cub and Scar have been linked by the Vex ever since their deal. One day, Cub's iron armor burns against his skin all at once, and through the searing pain is a horrifying realization that Scar has given in. - M

-@/petrichormeraki

- After a while Cub gets the resources to build a nether portal, but then he finds his portal has connected with someone else's. He finds himself lost again, without access to the farms he's built or the resources he's gathered, but at least he knows a friend is close.

- anonymous

- The End duo come across another end city. There’s a boat at the far end. Scar flies up on delicate vex wings to get the spare elytra and other loot. They’ve been walking for far too long. He floats down (as if he had the slow-falling effect. There’s only health in the brewing stand. Bdubs’ worry for Scar increases) with an extra set of trousers, boots, an elytra, the potions and a pic. Scar offers the elytra to Bdubs. He refuses. It’ll take longer to walk, but he never wants to fall again🟣

- Mumbo gets caught up in redstone work and doesn't bother trying to find anyone else. So when another hermit finally finds him, he has to stop his evoker friend from attacking. Whether or not he's successful is another thing.

- Anonymous

- (Scattered AU) Consider. When Doc finds Grian on the mountain peak while exploring the terrain, a message sends through everyone's communicators. <Grian was blown up by a Creeper>. Doc doesn't get a death message that time, despite both of them suffering the consequences of a surprised Doc in a server where mob-oriented hermits are more volatile than they should be. Doc doesn't go looking for other hermits again after that, and Grian is shocked into numbness at the dawning realization that his monster friends might be so much worse off than he thought. - M

- @/petrichormeraki

A summary of where things stand so far

- scattered au pog!!! hypno is in a seemingly endless flowery field. it was nice at first, but there's no trees, no food, and hardly any water. the sun is so hot. flowers aren't filling. hypno thought he liked being alone.

- Anonymous

- Mumbo doesn’t succumb to the magic of the mansion like perhaps Cub and Scar have, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t entirely unaffected- his skin becomes a little more washed out, instincts a little more violent- he certainly can’t go into villages anymore, otherwise the iron golem will smash him to bits

- @/fluffy-papaya

- With Scar using Vex magic, the Vex turn their attention to Cub, trying to tempt him at every turn. More then once he's found his mask in one of his chests, staring up at him, or awoken in a cold sweat from a dream full of vex. So far, he's resisted the temptation. Wether that lasts is another question entirely.

-@/bat-connoisseur

- Maybe eventualy hypno realises Even flowers would need water to grow, or that the bees must have a bee hive somewhere around here, and the bee hive is always connected to a tree(I think thats the case in Minecraft). So he tries to find where the buzzing comes from and follow the bees around.

- @/ciaravixen

- cleo bases a lot of her identity around being a zombie, right? she probably isnt too happy to be cured. she probably cries all the time it takes her to heal. it had to be done, but that doesnt mean she has to like it. and she doesnt, not one little bit.

- Anonymous

- that ask about Mumbo not bothering to look for anyone got me thinking.... Mumbo getting too caught up in his work with the evokers to look for the others. Mumbo making friends with the illagers. Mumbo knowing that it's completely reasonable that nobody has found him yet, but still getting the creeping feeling that no one is coming for him. Mumbo spending all his time with his new friends because, after all, they're here, and the hermits aren't... All this to say that, when the hermits eventually do find him, he might not be very inclined to leave...

- @/crows-in-space

- At one point, Mumbo's new friends are just...watching him try to do his stuff, observing. Mumbo's getting increasingly frustrated when ne of the evokers watching him breaks off and hands him something. At first he thinks its a totem of undying, its shaped like one, but its strange. Made out of iron, and its eyes are diamonds instead of emeralds. Then it starts to burn his hands and he passes out from the pain. When he wakes, its gone and he moves on, a bit more wary of his 'friends'. Maybe it was a mean joke, or some kinda of strange inhiation for the mansion maybe Except next time he's frustrated, he thows his hands up annoyed and fangs rise out of the ground around him and snap at the air. He cries out, confused, before looking at his hands which almost look like they've been painted with gray paints. it wont come off. He seems mentally the same but now he starts to experiment with his new found abilities. Maybe they can help with his redstone or even find others.

- Anonymous

- after trying a poisonous flower, hypno respawns back in the field. this time, he tries walking in a different direction. maybe this is the way out.

- Anonymous

- The flowers in Hypno’s area are just so perfect... blooming dandelions don’t lose their seeds when he brushes against them, petals that are crushed underfoot quickly regain their shape- and if his mind wasn’t so affected, he would’ve noticed the flower he picked was quickly replaced by another

- @/fluffy-papaya

- The Moobloom has one unique feature: The ability to leave behind flowers in its path... that is, the ability to alter the world around it simply by walking. These flower plains are not particularly large, maybe eight or so chunks across in each direction, but glitched world generation spawned in a herd of mooblooms, and all they've been doing is walking around causing little distortions, one on top of the other. From the inside, where Hypno is standing, the plains go on forever. The air is thick with buttercup pollen that's slowly dulling his sense of space and time. He has to pull it together, somehow. Force the world to recognise that he's walking forwards in a straight line. Or he'll be wandering in circles forever...

- @/draconic-dreams

- another hermit- maybe beef? sees the edge of a deep, fragrant field. on the horizon, not far away, is hypno, walking in circles. he calls but he cannot hear beef. something tells the man not to go into that field- at least, not without a flint and steel. (Shade note: Beef and Joe saved Hypno and are currently sheltering him (unconscious) in their spawn sanctuary)

- anonymous

- Maybe if they went through the exit portal and it glitched but good. They don't think about the fact it should send them back to their spawns, Scar feels something at the back of his mind that very much isn't him tell him to change his mind, stay in this place becuase they'll just be trapped if they try to leave, but Bdubs grabs his arm and jumps in before Scar can say anything. For a second, blessed silence, Scar's mind feels clear and normal. then they show up at world spawn and scare theother

- anonymous

(Shade note: people at the spawn haven now include Joe, Beef, Hypno, TFC, Scar, and Bdubs)

- Once Keralis and Cleo are healed up, the village gang starts going to 0,0 to try to meet up with others. On the way, they find a flower forest (potentially the same one Hypno’s in). They find some mooblooms and fall in love (this was def not done bc I want some fluff, nope not at all /s) -🟣

- Mumbo receives a set of robes from his evoker friend. He’s loathe to get rid of his suit, but at the same time... well, all the better to fit in, right? This is a glitch and fluke anyway, and he might as well blend in if the illagers ever turn on him. That’s it. That’s the only reason he tosses the suit jacket into the fireplace, don’t be silly. It has nothing to do with the feeling that he just doesn’t want to leave...

- anonymous

- I’m imagining Shattered Impulse looking like the Fishman from Shape of Water + the teeth of an Angler fish and the ability to unhinge his jaw. Poor guy probably gets mistaken for a glitched mob when someone finds him.

- @/fandomrecycling

- Yes hello it's me again. After the pollen spells breaks for Hypno (and whoever else might have tried to save him beforehand...), he notices he's a little different. he can't always control how he moves, he doesn't like eye contact, and he takes an even bigger interest in his, well, interests than before. Basically Tourettic Hypno go brrr (I am tourettic so feel free to ask me clarification!)

- @/fireflower-dusk

- I don't think Keralis has been mentioned except for being in the nether so I would like to contribute that he spawned in that soul sand and skeleton biome that has almost nothing in it.

- anonymous

- Mumbo, being hundreds of thousands of blocks out from spawn, is the last hermit to be found. Even after the glitch was fixed, Mumbo was so caught up in his research and new abilities that he no longer felt it mattered. He'd been apart from the hermits for well over a year now; and a long time ago he gave up hope that they'd come back for him. This was, of course, until he woke up one morning to a disturbance outside. When he goes to check the source of the racket, he's left frozen in place at the sight of Iskall on his mansion's doorstep. And at the end of it all, despite Mumbo telling himself that he was better alone, Iskall's hand on his shoulder, reassuring that "Yes, I'm here, yes, I'm real, and no, I'm not leaving, you spoon." Is enough for Mumbo to break, clinging to Iskall as if he'd disappear at any moment, murmuring "I'm sorry" over and over like a broken record. -🧸

- Maybe after Wels and Hels make their deal, and Wels gets some gold gear and a respawn anchor to click, Hels shows him how to create a portal to Hels the place to which from there, they think they can get into the overworld. The only catch being that to get in to Hels the place you need to focus all of you emotions onto pure hatred and anger, but the question is could Wels do it?

- Anonymous

- Hels taunts Wels about how no one came to get him, and plants ideas about how this was done on purpose, about how he's the only one to spawn in the nether for a reason. He tells him the hermits want him gone. And Wels of course becomes angry but he becomes angry at Hels for trying to tell him his friends didn't care about him. He's also angry at himself though, maybe for thinking he hasn't done enough to make his friends want to keep him around. He is never mad at the hermits though, never them

- TFC's concerned. Even if he thinks it's great he found Bdubs and Scar, the latter shouldn't be able to just kill the ender dragon alone. TFC doesn't know much about Scar but the man can barely fly usually, why did he turn into a vex, anyway? vexes don't exist in the end. TFC need to ask, at least to make sure he's ok, but everytime he tries he stops in his track once the cold, icy blue eyes stare back at him. devoid of the usual warmth his green ones have.

- Anonymous

- (Scatter AU) Saw someone mention the other ops on the server and had a thought: Tango is a programmer with a specialty in game programming. He’s probably sitting at the campfire thinking of every single way the game must have been corrupted to cause this many problems. If he could just get into the code, maybe he could fix some of these problems. I’ll bet he’s driving himself a little crazy thinking of everything that could be done to fix the world and not being able to do anything...

- Anonymous

- Cub was lucky, he thinks. Seeing the many death messages in chat, he's torn between gratitude that he's ended up with what almost looks like a normal spawn, and worry for his friends. After gathering enough resources to stay reasonably safe, he knows what he has to do next. So when he encounters Xb, he eventually suggests he takes some resources and a bed he's salvaged from the abandoned village and heads towards 0,0, hoping there'll be someone there. (1/3)But as for him... well, there's an obvious place to head as far as he can see, for someone with a safe enough spawn point and the ability to gather resources. A place where he knows for sure he'll find someone else, someone who needs help. After all, unless this world is even more messed up that it seems, there's only one place where a player would be killed by the Ender dragon, and he knows exactly how to get there. (2/3) (Shade note: Him and xB were not successful in finding the Hermit who the mystery portal belonged to. They must have died in the Nether and returned to their spawn point. XB resists the idea that they split up, but he sees the logic in it and agrees to start the long journey for 0,0.) (pt. 3 was eaten by the inbox)

- Anonymous

- Maybe one of the reasons Cleo doesn't like being a human as much is because she had chronic pain (particularly in her back) when she was alive, and when she gets cured after meeting up with False, Stress, and Keralis, her back pain comes back (along with all the other pains of being alive)

-@/justme123abz

- Whenever Etho spawns, wherever Etho spawns, he takes it upon himself to tell each and every Hermit he can find to head towards 0,0. He's not sure why, but he believes that if they get everyone together, they can figure out how to fix the broken world.If there aren't any Hermits in sight, he'll make a sign out of whatever's avalible before going searching. It's a complete pain to try and build anything coherent out of sand and cactus, but he has to try. He has to get everyone together. It's their best hope. It's their only hope.Even Evil X. Even Hels. Everyone. He doesn't care about past grievances. They need to get through this. And their only option is to do it together. (Shade note: He doesn't stay with Team ZIT for long. He probably dies trying to protect them from something, knowing that it will only result in him finding another Hermit anyway. Even though he himself isn't making any progress toward the origin, he counts it as a victory every time he can guide one of his friends just a little bit closer.)

- Doc Ren and Grian himself thought that him being found and safe would fix everything right? yea no he has horrible fevor, he struggles to retain warmth depsite 2 feet from a fire, he's tired and has a hard time stay awake becuase on the mt he slept alot, he barley eats cuz he cant hold too much down rn. He cant stand being alone or he'll start to panic, ands he's just trying to ignore the new fox fetures he has desperately when he's aware enough to do. Doc and Ren have a hard time ahead of them.

- Anonymous

- Mumbo was trying to make a machine with redstone and evoker magic to contact the hermits right?so what if he did build the machine ad at first his only way to get the magic was to go annoy the evoker hoping he would try to hit him and instead hit the machine to power it. Plan backfired so many times because of the vex killing him before. So when Mumbo becomes apprentice he wants to try power the machine himself but it breaks because he can't control how much magic he uses yet.time to study magic

-@/artsarasp

- Etho dies with the Zit and ends up back in it. Next he ends up in X's spawn, there's no one around but he finds the bloody tunnel X punched himself, and races down it to see in the distance Xisuma and Jevin in a cave.He calls out to them, only to get overwhelmed by zombies that just spawned, He manages to gurgle out 0,0 before he dies again. (He's now determined to be the messenger of meetings, even willing to die on purpose to find them all). After that? Ren's old spawn, now he has to track ren

- anonymous

- I guess hypno’s been... hypnotizd 👉😎👉

- We need more Jevin and xisuma interaction content, be it fluff or angst, how aware is jevin by the time Xisuma gets there? How many axolotls do they take with them on the way to the surface?

- @/ciaravixen

(Shade comment: We need more Jevin and xisuma interaction content, be it fluff or angst, how aware is jevin by the time Xisuma gets there? How many axolotls do they take with them on the way to the surface? )

- Mumbo having to learn how to use the magic, the evoker will probably also try to teach him how to summon the vex, even if Mumbo really wants to just focus on the magic and not the evocation.What if he's able to summon Scar since he gave his name to the vex? just by accident and Mumbo gets so startled by Scar's new appearance that he immediately interrupts the evocation and makes Scar dissappear. Scar reappears where he was before confused cause for a moment he saw Mumbo?did he allucinante??

- @/artsarasp

- Scattered AU! So what if what happened with EX and Hels happened with old hermits to? Like Biffa, Generikb, Jessassin etc etc. Everyone is concerned as it is but then they see a death message from one of them and realize it's even worse then they thought.

- Anonymous

- Once Wels and Helssknight are in Hels the have to sneak around a lot. Hels isn’t as popular there as he had previously boasted, that’s why he had tried to take over the over world. Cue heart to heart talk before a Hels version of another hermit cuts them off. (Can you pick the Hermit I’m kinda stuck here)

- Anonymous

- Iskall must have not even known the direction he was walking from his desert spawn, so its purely by luck he ended up finding the mansion mumbo resides in- his cybernetic eye is fixed almost instantly upon his arrival by mumbo and iskall feels his hope fades as he realises they’re /so/ far from the hermits. I also guess he must be worried about whats happening to his friend right before him, mumbo wouldnt willingly give into the vex and evoker magic right? 1/2 But he isn’t so sure anymore, the days at the mansion are quiet and uncomfortable as Iskall has to be wary of the illagers that walk the halls, mumbo assures him of his safety, but theres no light in his eyes - he doubts the illagers welcomed mumbo at first- The usual banter isn’t there at all, its dead silence as mumbo keeps on working and Iskall can see how paler his skin becomes and the blue scars that litter his body 2/2

- Anonymous

- Etho died and respawned at the true spawn once. Beef was elated to see him and was afraid if he let him go, he would disappear. He didn’t want to lose his friend again. In the end, he does, he was actually with Etho when he dies, and he never lets the feeling go.

- @/harley-the-pancake

- aww poor etho! At least he's okay with this new role as messenger. Now i can just imagen he ends up at Ren's spawn and manages to track the man, nearly dying but staying alive and- thats a house in the distance! He goes over and nearly runs into Doc, who invites him in surprised and they catch each other up, their spawns and Etho's situation. They're overjoyed to hear about the others and Ethos glad to see them realtivly okay. Grian's condition is worrying however, changed and still weak (1) They agree they need to start heading to 0,0 but Ren is nervous about leaving safety, Doc wants them safe, and with Grian still sick and weak from laying in snow for weeks it'll take a bit until he's stable enough to travel (he'll probs have to be carried anyways). Etho stays for a few days at their insistence for rest, he wants to keep going there is more hermits out there he hasn't found, they are insistent that he take time to recover. Then, he lets himself die. Off to the next hermit! (2)

- Anonymous

- This is for the very very beginning, but maybe before False meets up with Cleo, she spawns in a warm ocean biome. Coral structures fill the water around her, and tropical fish dart between them. It would be almost peaceful, were it not for the fact that False was encased in a cage of coral.It’s a gamble every time. She has to try and smash her way out of her colorful prison before the tide rolls in, slow and steady water rising up her body and over her head. The water makes her movements clumsy and arduous as she tries to free herself, racing against time to escape the awful tide. (Pt 2) OH SORRY I HAD AN IDEA (this is from the coral False anon)What if Stress and False both spawn in that biome and they have to try and help each other out before the tide comes in?? Added angst if one of the times one manages to escape but the other doesn’t

- Anonymous

- (scattered au) Every time that a hermit dies the universe and the world file starts to corrupt, the way that things are going if everything doesn't go back to normal soon, then the world will crumble on itself with the hermits inside.

- Anonymous

- Admins log, day: ⬛⬛⬛ I've finally managed to find my way to the drip stone caves, weirdly I think I may have a good connection down here, I'll try to contact the others, if they haven't forgotten about me yet. (Shade note: Far away in the woodland mansion, Mumbo rubs his eyes and marks down another failure on his latest contraption. How long will it be until he can generate a signal? He has no way of knowing that, for a single moment, it worked. He stopped checking his communicator a long time ago, so he doesn't see the single message until much later: <Xisuma> can anyone hear me?)

- At some point Etho cycles round to Doc's spawn. His friend is long gone but there are five creepers in formation watching him. Waiting for something.It takes a moment for him to recall the trick of unfocusing his ears just right, so that their hisses resolve into words. He hasn't had to do it for years, after all. He hasn't run into General Spaz since he left Chocolate Island.“It'ssss been a while, Esssssho” the General says. “Let'sssss make a wager”The General reaches out for a handshake... it seems the glitch finally gave him a pair of arms.(ancient Etho lore go brrrr)

- Anonymous

- Both the snow and the void are cold, and getting stuck in there means getting frostbite a lot is fairly likely, so Grian and Bdubs would be unlikely to get out with all their fingers...

- @/bat-connoisseur

- Based on a little piece of this ask where it was mentioned that Hypno passed out only three steps outside the flower biome, I start to wonder, how long was he wandering in circles without food? Why did he collapse so immediately? Was the biome itself perhaps sustaining him? Keeping him "healthy" (if you could call it that) and alive? COULD he have starved to death if he hadn't been pulled out? Or would he have just kept walking? And walking. And walking...

-@/asexualbert

- An idea focusing on evil xisuma. He ended up spawning on the nether roof, stuck with nothing but mushrooms and bedrock as far as the eye can see. No communication, no water, no way out. He can probably eat the mushrooms, at the very least.... but there may be some bad side effects from it. It's disheartening and lonely up there, dying from starvation over. And over. And over. At one point, etho may have spawned there as well... but of course, he wouldnt last long. Condemned to endless roof...

-@/therainofsweetmelody

- Okay, hear me out: after Hypno’s been out of his illusion for a while, he starts to get headaches. He doesn’t think anything of it, until he wakes up one day with small horns growing and flowers in his hair. In conclusion: Moobloom!Hypno

- @/harley-the-pancake

Art:

- An Impulse

- A Grian

- A Guardian Impulse

- A Void Bdubs by @/sweetest-honeybee

- This Hypno by @/irys-97

- an Iskall and a Grian

- a fox Grian

- A Guardian Impulse

- a suffering Xisuma

- Mumbo and Evoker doodles

Writing:

Up. He needs to go up. He spawned too deep in the world, and though he'd heard of underground spawns there was no way, no way in the world that being so deep under was normal. Every cave he crawled up either came to a dead end or opened into a massive, mob-filled cavern, and somehow he still hadn't found even half a mineshaft. He could spend hours upon hours painfully clawing his way through the stone, but he keeps convincing himself it'll be faster to find a cave that leads to the surface. The pounding heartbeat of a warden stills rings in his ears, an ever-present reminder of his terrible luck. If only he could get some wood. Just a few planks, some torches. Anything. It's almost as if the stone doesn't want him to leave.

- @basaltdragon

- Buried by @arts-and-drafts

- Cleo grits her teeth and pulls a leather cap low over her head and stays on the outskirts of the taiga village, where the less scrupulous people go. She can't stay here long, if an iron golem catches her she's going to end up social spawning a bunch of less sapient friends and wiping out the village. The air is cold and thin out here, close to the mountains. The strays leave her alone. She's not sure how to feel about that. ~@betweenlands

- "A poem, by Impulse" by @/rayveewrites

- Pulse by @/arts-and-drafts

- Unnamed Impulse fic by @bat-connoisseur

- Another Impulse fic by @/betweenlands

- Don't think about it by me (@shadeswift99 )

- A poetic fic by @irys-97

- this short anon piece

- If I lose myself by @/arts-and-drafts

- Mountainside by @/basaltdragon

- Sleepwalk by @/betweenlands

- This Grian fic by @silverechosandsmileymasks

- A Jevin fic by @/basaltdragon

- This Hypno piece by @/fireflower-dusk

- This Iskall anon

- Alternate Impulse fic by @/rayveewrites

- Short Grian fic by @rk9-mew2

- an alternate headcanon for Mumbo

- This Xisuma fic by @/bat-connoisseur

[juniaships]

Odelloyd (Yodel shipping)

Since @minecraftninjerkid expressed interest I wrote a particularly long post about Odette and Lloyd Garmadon's relationship. It's basically set in my AU of the while Ninjago canon. It's pretty angsty in some parts, and honestly I love this couple because it's a story of two individuals who learn to trust and like TALK with each other and work out their issues together! Plus I feel like if Lloyd needed another love interest within canon it should be someone who can match his energy, a strong young lady who works side by side with him!

Harumi is still the princess but now she has a LADY IN WAITING!! YAYAY

Mostly because she needed a morality pet in some way but also a foil to show if Harumi hadn't been so consumed by personal demons

Odette was a homeless orphan living on the streets with her sister; often stealing from food carts to feed themselves

One night Odette made the mistake of stealing from one of the SOG and they catch her and bring her to their base

Instead of being mad Harumi was impressed by her thieving skills and decided to recruit her. Odette didn't want to at first but then she had second thoughts thinking the extra money could help her and baby sis

So Harumi brings her back and manages to convince the Emperor and Empress to hire Odette as a lady in waiting & decoy if Harumi needed to sneak out to do her business Odette is So instead of it being Harumi it's Odette who stays and befriends the ninja

Odette had NO IDEA her friend plotted to blow up the palace - with her still inside - not great thinking there o' Quiet One

She also had no idea how AWESOME Lloyd is on a motorcycle: "Sweet moves grasshopper!"

They stop at several places gathering clues on the location on the final mask leaving a lot of time for Lloyd and odette to bond; for the first time in forever Odette starts to enjoy life again

The Ninja take Odette in and decide to search for the final mask. Odette does what she can to help out (and find info) getting close to them and my OCs

Lloyd even buys her a gift: a lotus shaped hairpin to replace the one she lost in the palace fight

The jungle incident happens; Lloyd and Odette separates for a while and she comes across the real princess who had stalked the group the whole time undercover

But she's afraid that her big secret might come out everywhere she goes she's often looking over her shoulder

Odette starts to really enjoy the Ninja's company and all her perceived notions about them fade; but she still had to find Harumi to try to talk her out of her plot

Odette meets up with Lloyd inside the caves and they look for the final mask. Finally they see it and Lloyd grabs it, happy that they found the masks before the gang did but notices Odette isn't feeling the same

She's tells Harumi that they're all making a HUGE mistake with the Masks; Harumi of course refuses and orders her to stick to the plan or else

He asks her what's wrong and that's when Odette becomes hysterical and begs Lloyd to destroy the mask or run

Lloyd doesn't know whay she's talking about and tries to calm her down suddenly they hear some sarcastic clapping and in steps in Harumi. Dressed in full Royal Garb

Lloyd is confused and doesn't understand looking back and forth between the newly revealed Princess and the one next to him

Harumi reveals that she is - was - the real princess and that Odette was acting as her decoy to spy on the ninja. She hadn't count on Lloyd catching feelings for Odette which made it all the more sweeter

Odette pleas with Lloyd claiming that while she was ordered to spy, her feelings for him and his friends were genuine. Lloyd coldly brushes he brushes her off and calls her a liar and demands Harumi why she planned all this. The Princess explains that the Ninja failed to save her family from the Great Devourer & that it was Lloyd himself who unleashed such monster on the city killing her parents and several civilians

Harumi also revealed that she had the Emperor and Empress assassinated as punishment for their inaction during that event, and subsequent failure in treating her like a person. "They didn't want a daughter they wanted a Princess."

Harumi takes out her knife and begins attacking Lloyd; Odette watches helplessly as they fight and in the ensuing chaos Harumi knicks Lloyd and orders Odette to return to their group

The Ninja wait by the docks and discovers Odette and the real princess together. They're shocked to see two Princesses; the real Harumi admits her plan knowing they wouldn't last for long to do anything to stop her. An Angry Kai yells at Odette for selling them out

Then the monster attack happens because it is drawn to the mask's essence; Lloyd saves Odette from being crushed, she tries to use the brief chance to explain but he still brush her off

The SOG board their ship and leaves; Odette wallows in guilt Harumi snarky asks her if she really thinks the Ninja are her friends. Odette shakes her head no and looks out the window praying for them to be alright

Back at the city the SOG takes Misako (and Cole's gf Rhenée) hostage to draw Lloyd out. Odette is no longer in her casual clothes but in SOG attire; at the ritual she pretends to be clumsy hoping to stall the ritual long enough

Rhenée asks Odette if she's willing to risk her soul for the terrible actions of other, hoping that Odette can make the right choice. This makes her think about her placement in the SOG

Suddenly the ninja crashes the party just in time and battles the gang. Odette frees Rhenee and Misako and allows herself to be apprehended

Outside she's sitting in the police van when Lloyd walks by and she begs him to hear her out. He wants to listen but is furious with her for betraying them and cuts her off

The ninja head to a bar to celebrate their victory; Lloyd has an honest talk with his mother about Harumi and vows to never trust again. Rhenée says that while Odette lied to them she notices that she's very different from the rest of the SOG

At the jailhouse Odette is sobbing at having lost everything - her friends, her life, and maybe even her sister. She takes out the lotus pin and is about to throw it way when she hears some commotion outside. Apparently the ritual brought back a monster. Fearing for her sister's safety she uses the pin to unlock her cell and sneaks out

Lloyd is too occupied with protecting Baby Wu to fight off Harumi; before she knocks him off Odette arrives & saves him and the baby

In the chaos the Monster arrives and tries to crush them all, Odette gives Lloyd enough time to escape but she falls to her supposed death in the process

Once the battle is over the four original ninjas are nowhere to be seen and are presumed dead

They find out Odette disappeared also, and believe her to he dead too

Harumi and her gang express joy at their enemies demise; and the gang no longer recognize Odette as their own seeing her as a traitor. Deep down Harumi feels a tiny bit pain over the loss of her only real friend but quickly sets that aside to prepare one last scheme

Lloyd grieves Odette's loss regretting they never had the chance to really TALK about what happened between them.

Unknown to everyone, the ninja and Odette were transported to the First Realm

Seasons 9&10 ramps up the angst

Cole is the first one who demands to hear her explanation. Odette explains her backstory and says whole none of it justifies her lies she has now become aware of her actions and is willing to help the ninja FOR REAL FOR REAL

The ninja do NOT want Odette anywhere near them after her betrayal and for a while shuns her.

Zane is the second one; his relationship with former merc Jetta he understands a bit what it's like to choose bad things for survive

Jay and Kai takes the longest: Jay because he's paranoid that Odette may just be evil and insane as Harumi; Kai because he is very protective of Lloyd (who he sees as a younger brother, and even had begun to saw Odette as another sister) and furious that she'd hurt him and their whole team like that

This leads to a series of trials for Odette to prove that she's willing to atone; she actually finds the last dragon's nest and vows to protect it

Meanwhile in Ninjago the city started an underground resistance led by Lloyd and Nya; Lloyd took in Odette's sister to take care of her now that she is gone

Odette and the Ninja finds a way out of the first realm and arrives with their new dragons. Odette splits off to confront Harumi and sees her on top of a building...which is about to fall much to her horror

Lloyd witnesses the scene and shouts Odette's name; the building collapses and he sinks to his knees in fear

Everyone watches with baited breath and cheers as they see both girls and the dragon coming out of the smoke alive

Lloyd and Odette apologize to each other then go off with their friends to fight off the Oni invasion

Once everything is over & Harumi decides to turn a new leaf and surrenders, everyone gathers at the monastery to celebrate. Wu invites Odette and her sister a permanent home with them

After s10 they don't get back together that quickly. Lloyd still has trust issues as in canon and Odette feels like shit believing herself to tbe the cause. Lloyd says it's not her fault, he's simply fed up with random villains coming at him for the crime of being the Chosen One.™

Odette isn't exactly let off easy by the public; there's multiple conspiracies about her and stuff and some aren't exatly forgiving her for working with a group that killed the royal family and destroyed the city. In order to redeem herself in the eyes of the public Odette starts training to become a real Ninja, doing little side missions to help people even something as simple as helping little old ladies use an escalator. Lloyd supports her every step of the way, using his popularity "and natural charisma" to dispel any rumors about her.

[yandere-sins]

Imagine Yandere Werewolf Bakugou was kidnap and a slave by a witch then Y/N who is a retire knight kills the witch. Y/N sets him free but like he has no where to go. He has been a slave for a long time that his pack is gone some where, he is weak from the lack of food, and shelter. Y/N is like, "You can stay with me for awhile. I don't mind." Y/N lives in a comfy cabin and this is where Bakugou felt warmth in so long by this knight treated him kindly. Y/N thinks herself as an older sister.

@popcornsalazar Thank you for requesting, was a really interesting idea! ♥

»»————-———— ♡ ————————-««

When did he forget who he was?

He was Bakugou Katsuki, the strongest, biggest wolf of his pack, undefeated ever since he tore away from his parents and attract his own followers! He was a werewolf, a strong, dangerous creature that could maul any small little human figure. And yet, he had been captured by a simple witch, a nobody, someone who needed a piece of wood to cast some spells, say abracadabra and ride on a broom.

So when had he decided that this was okay? Living at the witch’s side for so long, being nothing but a guard dog, only ever taken off the magicial, invisible leash to scare away unwelcome visitors. He, the great Katsuki, a simple pup on a rug, chained down and greedy for every bone thrown his way. How could it have come to this?

And then, how had it come to you being allowed into the witch’s lair, cutting her head right off without even noticing him? You had no armor, no flag - a sign of belonging to a kingdom - stitched up on your clothes, and yet you had handled the sword with precision, blood splattering everywhere without even a wrinkle of concern on your face. At that time, he didn’t know why you even came, simply spilling blood without any word and turning to leave without a blessing or another thought.

If he hadn’t objected, ask you to help him, you would probably left him there to starve. Luckily, the moon phase had just ended, turning him back into a human, and he remembered your red face as he approached you, still chained and naked. Your first reaction had been to throw a fur rug at him, but at least you had heard him out, believed him when he told you his sad tale of captivity.

Just… the werewolf part. That he didn’t tell you.

Freeing him from his chains, you had helped getting him a cloak to cover up, inviting him to track back to your hut, so he could eat and get his strength back after being held capitve for so long. You must have noticed his rips shining through his skin, the countless scares adorning him. Even if they weren’t from the witch per se, it was a good thing he was so proud of them, loving to show them off, adding something to the pity you found for him.

For the first time in long, he felt alive again. Conversing, laughing, hearing of the outside world. It had been years apparently, since the witch caught him, as unbelievable as it was. Even if this wasn’t the rush of a hunt, the feeling of bones cracking in his jaw, it still was… satisfying. He couldn’t deny it.

Maybe he should have feared you. Feared the silver blades that you liked polishing and sharpening in case of an emergency. You were a knight, trained to kill, having done so countless times. The witch had done nothing to you, aside, apparently, taking a child from the nearby village. But you were just like him, a hunter, a killer. You liked the thrill, and didn’t mind the dirt and blood.

You were also annoyingly concerned about others how he found.

That was the only reason you even took it upon yourself to kill the witch and take him in. Nothing more than feeling so much empathy, that you’d even give him your bed to sleep in and cook more than you could afford to feed him, even if he couldn’t give you anything in return. Even when he swore upsidedown against that stupid hag that had captured him, you had been calm, patting his shoulders and promising it would be okay. That he was safe now. Like a child.

You always had the prettiest breathing rythm when you slept. It was always nervous and alert when you two went out, but you were incredible calm in your dreams, at least, for someone so ready for every attack that might come. Katuski had come to quite like being able to lay beside you, even when you still protested that he should have the bed alone. Guess you’ve gotten softer for him by now, trust building every day.

But this was bad, really bad.

All around him, it smelled like you. The cabin, the bed, the clothes he was wearing. It wouldn’t have surprised him if he smelled like you too. Truth be told, he had been ready to get home. He knew the city close to you and he knew how to get home from it, hoping he would find his pack in his territorry or maybe with his parents. Katuski hoped they bunch of idiots had been reasonable enough to reunite with what was closest to him, in hopes they could find him.

But how was he going to explain this smell? Everything about him smelled like you, and he got concerned whenever you two went out and he wasn’t able to smell you anymore. Sticky like honey, that’s how it felt, unable to seperate from him anymore. As if you had become one with him already.

Eyeing outside the little window above the bed, he could see the moon in full view. Soon enough, that damn, white ball of light would be complete again, giving him a new moon cycle to live out what he deep down was. A hunter, a wolf, a monster. Katsuki knew that if it came down to that, he wouldn’t be able to stay with you. How could a renowned knight like you ever accept someone like him, even if… Katsuki had long accepted you as his mate.

There weren’t many other explanations as to why it was so hard for him to separate from you. He had tried running away a few times already, not wanting to deal with staying with you longer than needed and getting more indepted to you. But by night, he had come back, and you had welcomed him even when he apologized only through gritted teeth. Why it made him crazy to not smell you and why he felt better smelling like you than smelling like blood and forest as werewolves usually do.

Those were only a handful things that showed him what this connection between you two really was. And he could deny it and curse the gods or whatever holy reigned over him, but undoubtedly, it was you. You were his mate, even if that made the neck hairs on both of your necks stand. The last thing Katsuki wanted was to be bound down by another spell, another inevitable strike of fate, but here he was, and his time to be angry about it run out with every second the moon revealed more of itself.

Latest by morning you would see it. His… form. You’d wake up next to a stinking mutt, only that this mutt wasn’t only technically bigger, but also ten times as dangerous as any street dog. And you’d jump for your swords, he’d slap them out of your hand and either maul you or devour you whole in his paniced instincts. So what could he do? Katsuki knew he should have just left, ran as far as he could and hoped he wouldn’t find back, but he found himself glued to the mattress, glued to the feeling of your back against your arm, you two having to sleep so close with how tiny the bed was.

And by your fucking scent.

So when had he decided that being with you like this was okay? That it was better to curse his existence than the rush of the hunt, the freedom of being a werewolf? Just because he wanted you in his life, was that worth it? Perhaps, because he was chained for so long, he had forgotten the taste of the other, so this was the only thing that felt good right now. But he wouldn’t know if he didn’t experienced going back to his better self.

Turning his head towards you, he watched you sleep peacefully while he was tormented by his thoughts. He knew that even if he tried to explain the situation, it wouldn’t go well, and it wasn’t like you could be with him while he roamed and pouched the forest. Maybe he was the next thing you’d set out to kill after he got too close to the village one day. But even worse so, he just couldn’t find it in himself to leave.

Overwhelmed with this feelings, Katuski found himself at a loss of what to do. Your scent would always lead him back to you, even when playing the role of the big bad wolf. In the end, with all the risks calculated, all he could do was hope that his other form could still recognize you, know not to hurt you. Then again, who knew what other things it wanted to do to you, besides shredding your body into pieces.

But it was his best bet. Not long from now, he’d be awaken, and this place wasn’t a good one to do that. Quietly, he slipped out, sharpened instincts helping navigate the dark and be quieter than a simple human like you could hear. It even helped him pick you up from your bed, wrapping a blanket helplessly around you before exciting the cabin, not bothering with closing the door.

If he couldn’t escape you, then you couldn’t escape him either. And if he had to make sure you both survived this, he had to get you away from there, shielding you from anything that stretched towards you two as he ran out of the forest, trying to find a cave, or a hideout for a while. Maybe he’d be able to explain it to you, maybe you two would be able to live alongside of each other if only you could understand him and his feelings.

Katsuki promised you quietly that he would be good to you, take care of your needs and provide for you in even the dire times. He could hunt, he could fight. He only lost his glory for a moment or two when he got captured. He’d lead his pack again, make them welcome you as his mate. Maybe build a family with you. Even if you two wouldn’t be able to see eye to eye at first, it would come eventually, the more time you two spent together.

Once you learned you could rely on him, your lives could weave themselves together easily, become one beautiful shared lifetime of joy. He was the greatest werewolf to live, he’d become it once again, to the point you’d look at him with awe in your face. And maybe, he would be able to learn to control himself, chaining you somewhere you couldn’t escape him, so he could learn patience even when he was blinded by his animalistic instincts. He just needed a chance to try this out.

And you needed a chance to see to which lengths he would go, just for you.

[factual-fantasy]

I WANNA SEE ALL UR UNDERTALE ART AND IDEAS🥺🥺🥺I WOULD LOV TO READ AN EXPLANATION OF UR LAST TWO POSTS

...Aight, bet.

I’m going to have to be slightly vague for a few reasons. For one, because people seemed to like this idea, I have been expanding it more and working through it, this means everything is subject to change. Second is if I go too far into detail it’ll take too long.

So, the story.

This takes place in a Refinedtale like universe. i.e. Chara, Asriel and Gaster are alive and on the surface after a pacifist run. Now, In this story Frisk, Chara and Asriel are friends with Monster kid, abbreviated to MK. Now they somehow end up in this huge cave system, with tunnels and huge rooms. A HUGE plot hole that made me shy away from posting about this story is I have no explanation for how they got there. They just wake up there separated for no reason. They weren’t doing anything strange or magic related, no they were just sleeping in their beds I guess and woke up in this weird place. No Its not supposed to be back in the underground.

So, the kiddos wake up confused, find each other and decide to look around. They come into a big room and find Toriel standing in the middle. Her outlines are white and the rest of her body is black. Her face is also blotched out, just like Papyrus in the first post. They try to approach her, but she attacks them with everything she’s got. Like really, she is trying hard to kill these kids. The kids fight back and keep trying to talk to her. Asriel manages to slip through the battle and pounce on his mom. He’s sobbing and begging her to stop and that she’s scaring him. She instantly stops. Her lines turn black and her body turns green. She becomes really connected to Asriel and becomes his servant all of a sudden.

The idea is that if one of the kids touch one of the blotched monsters, the monsters lines will turn black and they’ll change to what ever color the kids is. Asriel = Green, Chara = Red, Frisk = Blue, and MK = orange.

Toriel loves Azzy now and carries him around. hence this picture,

The kids are a bit nervous because she literally just tried to kill them. Now after that battle they start to look for more people.. and fine Undyne. Undyne was really intense, but MK managed to slip behind everyone and ram his head into Undyne’s leg, knocking her over and changing her silhouette to orange.

They now assume that a lot of other monsters are around here, and all you have to do to get them out of that state is to touch them. And depending on who touches them, their color will change and they will follow that specific kid around.

So they continue searching and find their next opponent, Undyne lends them each a small spear to protect themselves.. and.. its turns out Sans is next.. this one was really upsetting. I have touched a little on Chara’s inner demons in Refinedtale with this post. In this fight with Sans, the battle is really tense and hard, its a sense of bitter sweet nostalgia for Chara. Sans was always the most interesting battle in the timelines wasn’t he? Sans is seemingly the most harmless monster there is! So small, so frail.. But so powerful too. When Chara remembers the battles with him she feels shame, but also excitement! Sans’s battles were the best ones. Its because it was truly personal. Sans knew she did something. This powerful hatred came deep from within his soul. It was terrifying, and wildly exciting!! Being in this place again, where she could try and kill the comedian once more.. was just.. so thrilling! She couldn’t stop herself, she couldn’t hold back! She lost herself in the madness..

..and went way, too far.

Chara stood there for a moment, panting and smiling from ear to ear.. and then it hit her. The excitement was gone.. and in its place was just dread. Shortly after realizing what she just did, she burst into tears seeing Sans’s head scattered all over the floor. Everyone is shocked, a RESET isn’t an option here, Sans has gotta be dead. Chara crumples to the floor and cries. But next thing you know, Sans’s face shards gravitate towards his body on the floor. His face reconstructs itself, he changes to a light red color and Stands up. In the picture, her knee bumps Sans hand, thus counting as being touched. He walks over to Chara and helps her stand up. He’s now protecting her and loving her like Tori is to Azzy. After a long while of recovering and apologizing, they move on to look for more people. This is when they find Papyrus.

The fight with Papyrus was beyond anything they ever expected. It was like they were fighting Sans again.. but Papyrus was so much stronger than Sans, he was so much FASTER than Sans, it was insane! He could focus on every single one of them all at once! There was a post (that I can’t find) explaining how its very likely that Papyrus is stupid strong- he just holds back on you, anyway.. So this fight goes horribly, everyone is getting hurt. Chara tells Sans to do something, try to get Papyrus to stop, make it so one of them can touch him. So Sans teleports above and behind Papyrus’s head. In the picture above, that’s Sans in the middle of teleporting. He wraps his arms around Papyrus’s neck in an attempt to stop him. Making him lose his grip on Asriel.

Papyrus reaches his arm back, snatches Sans out from behind him, holds him up by his shirt and is about to kill him.. when..

Asriel begs “Papyrus stop!! Stop fighting us!!” Papyrus turns green.. the blasters and bones disappear.. then he gently sets Sans down. Not a word is spoken between the two brothers. But you could cut the fear and tension between them with a knife.

They all do their best to recover from this fight and move on. They keep searching and then find Alphys.

This one was hard because no one could get near her. She would sit completely still and the electricity would just come to them. The idea is everyone distracts her while Frisk sneaks behind her and manages to touch her. She turns blue and they move onto the next monster, luckily not much heart ache here.

Then they get to Mettaton, there’s a slightly angsty yet cool part where Mettaton is attacking Frisk and Alphys jumps in to protect her. Its like the Scientist vs its beloved creation you know? Anyway this is where things start to get fuzzy. I haven’t decided who gets Mettaton or how they get him. But lets just say its MK?

Now, I haven’t been able decide if Grillby will be one of the Blotched monsters. You might say that Grillby isn’t a significant character to the Undertale timeline at all, and you would be right. However in Refinedtale he is. Grillby plays a huge part in Sans’s life and to the overall movement in the timeline. And since this is Refinedtale based I figured it would make sense if he was in this.. but for some reason it just feels a bit off.. anyways, if Grillby was to be in this, he would be right after the Mettaton battle. I feel like Asriel would be the one to get him because he has a bit of a special advantage when it comes to fire type magic.

Next would be Gaster. Just like Papyrus, he was stronger than expected. The kids all kind’a saw him as a weak, broken old man that was way past his prime. Well they were completely wrong and apparently they forgot where Sans and Papyrus’s powers came from to begin with. So the battle is rough, the kids are tired and just manage to snag him. I can see Chara being fed up and charging through his attacks in a fit of rage and throwing him to the floor. He turns red and things are okay for a while.. They rest and try to collect themselves.

..they all know who’s next..

The four kids get carried through the cave system to conserve energy while they look for Asgore. They find him and decide that the kids trying to fight him is a bad idea. They don’t know if they can die here and they’re exhausted. Sans has demonstrated that the blotched monsters cant seem to die so.. they form a plan.

Sans, Papyrus, Gaster, Undyne, and Mettaton will all attack and just try to get him pinned on the floor, then one of the kids will run over and boop him on the nose. Simple! In the meantime Toriel (maybe Grillby) and Alphys will stand back  to protect the kids. Cool right?..

(warning, Gore reading up ahead)

..Well, there’s a reason why Asgore is the king of monsters you know. It goes horribly. Gaster is pinned to the floor by Asgore’s foot and has his rib cage smashed in. Papyrus is impaled in the chest by his trident and is pinned to the floor, destroying his rib cage as well. Sans is pulling hard on Asgores soul with blue magic, trying desperately to get him on the floor and off his family. He’s blasting him in the shoulder with Blasters and impaling him with large bone spears. Undyne has a spear dug into his other shoulder and is bashing him in the head and yanking on his horns. Mettaton is using guns and shooting him from every exposed angle, he’s using his arms to pull on his knees in an attempt to get them to buckle beneath him..

...but he just wont go down.. no matter how hard they try, its not working..

Asgore throws Undyne off of him and smashes her head against the floor, causing it to crumple and shatter. Sans is mercilessly yanked by the arm and thrown hard against the cave walls, causing him to break in every area and the kids to shriek and cry. He kicks Gaster aside and shakes Papyrus off of his trident. He then uses the trident to slash at Mettatons head so hard his head comes flying off.

(Gore reading over)

The terror sets in as Asgore makes his way over to the crying kids. Toriel is literally on fire, Alphys is sparking, (maybe Grillby’s flames are roaring) they’re both(/all) ready to fight. The 5 blotched monsters on the ground slowly regenerate, but they’re not doing it fast enough.

As he steps closer and the crying gets louder, Asriel looks desperately for a way out. He then notices Chara is gone. And Sans has vanished from his place on the floor. Before Asgore can make his move, Chara and Sans drop down from above him and land on his shoulders, Sans’s face hadn’t even reconstructed yet, he didn’t grab on to Asgore and simply slid down on his cloak and collapsed on the floor. Chara gripped tightly to Asgore’s neck and shrieked, “STOP!!”

..He turned red, put down his trident and stopped.

As to what comes after and why this all happened? I don’t know. I imagined the four kids wake up in their beds the next morning and remember all of this, but the blotched monsters don’t. I also thought this could’ve taken place during a picnic. The kids disappear for about 10-20 minutes and show back up running from the forest crying and wounded. I also thought that everyone wakes up on the forest floor and only the kids remember, and everyone else is just confused on how they got there.

Haven’t decided on a beginning or an ending. But that’s pretty much the story in as much detail as I’ve built so far. :} I hope you enjoyed reading this, it came out longer than I intended, but that’s alright I think. ,,^ ^,,

[frostsinth]

Lost Time - Pt. 2

- Part 1 - MasterList -

Apologies to everyone waiting for this update! I forgot I had mostly finished it and got side tracked with the Raffle winners. But here it is! I hope it was worth the wait.

Check out my MasterList above for other ramblings, and feel free to BuyMeACoffee while you’re there. If you’d like to commission a story or art piece, DM me for details.

I appreciate the comments, reblogs, and asks you guys always send! They make my day and give me life! Thanks for being so great! (Tag request: @decadentsoulbiscuitgoth)

I gasped, my heart racing, my head throbbing. I felt my hands moving of their own accord, searching for something to grab onto. Trying to anchor myself in the spinning void. There was a distant sound, a familiar sound, but I couldn’t place it. I was consumed by the sensation of falling, tumbling. Without an up or down to orient myself. Images flashed past me, blurred and indistinct at first. None lingered long enough for me to focus, and seemed to be wiping past me like trees out the window of a moving carriage. I opened my mouth, tried to scream. Tried to make a sound of any kind. I couldn’t tell if anything came out.

There! A light, a gap amid the strange assault. It spun and drifted, but it seemed to be moving with me. I reached toward it, felt my fingers scrape the edge. Then they passed through it, like an incorporeal cloud. Sparks zapped across my skin, leaving behind tingling skin. But the light shifted, pulsing. Growing larger and coming towards me. Before I could react I was engulfed, and had to close my eyes against the searing light or else be blinded. I instinctively moved my hands to shield my face, but couldn’t tell if I was really moving them at all.

“She can’t have gone far, My Queen,” Came a purring, rasping voice, distant. It sounded like smoke and tasted like sulfur. My heart skittered at the sound of it. “We’ll find her.”

“See that you do.” Another voice, female. Cold, angry.

I blinked, searching through the fading light. But all I could see were outlines and shadows. Blurs at the edges of my vision. A huge form, hulking and glowing as if on fire, though everything was bathed in that unnaturally blinding light. Another, smaller, more slender, more delicate. I sensed the second turn, sensed its eyes settling on me. My breath stopped, my heart raced. I pushed myself back, scrambled to get away. I sensed the figures retreating, as if sucked into a singular distant point; shrinking and swirling as they disappeared like draining water. Then I realized they had not moved. I had. Jerked back from a tether around my middle which bent me in two. I could see my limbs trailing behind me. Could see the tips of my long blonde hair, snapping and cracking like whips as I was yanked away. Tossed back into the swirling mass of images and sounds. A loud ringing was filling my ears, and I tried to scream again.

I woke in a cold sweat, choking on my heart in my throat. I sat up sharply, looking this way and that, my eyes wild. I quickly swiveled my feet out from the furs, moving to stand. I wasn’t sure why, I couldn’t piece together the jumbles of in-cohesive thoughts in my mind. I just suddenly felt this strange urgency. This deep set fear. I needed to move. I needed to run, and keep running. And when I thought I had run enough, I needed to run some more. I pushed off the bed to climb to my feet in the same fluid motion as I had swung my legs free.

I cried out as my bad ankle gave out beneath me, and fell to the stone floor. My rough descent had me jarring my shoulder painfully, but in my confused state, I merely wriggled to try and get my feet under me again. I was shaking so hard my palms slid, unable to find purchase. A growling grunt had me jumping again, and the ground shook just before a large form suddenly crouched down beside me.

“Anha wet, Shikobakin,” Came a deep, soothing voice, “Shie’ka natwe.”

I jerked my head up as a big hand came to rest between my shoulder-blades. As my blue eyes settled on the dark green face with broad features and copper eyes, it all started to come rushing back to me. Well, at least the previous day; waking in the forest. Twisting my ankle. Being rescued by Njord and carried to his home. But the hollow echo of a life forgotten weighed heavily down upon me as I strained to push beyond the dense fog that shrouded everything beyond yesterday.  I let out a breath I didn’t know I had been holding, then gasped at the air as if I had just emerged from beneath the surface of a lake. Each following breath came out ragged, then sucked into my lungs painfully. The big hand at my back rubbed soothingly up and down. As I came to my senses, I shifted, sitting back on my bottom. Stretching my legs out in front of me and wincing in pain as my bad ankle was jarred but hardly noticing it besides. I was still shaking, and I brought my clasped hands to my chest, hugging them to myself in an effort to still the motion.

Njord shifted, dropping one knee to the ground and leaning his elbow across the other. He considered me quietly from the side of his eye, his hand still at my back. I glanced over at him, shaking my head. Wishing to explain my behavior, or reassure him I was fine. My mouth flapped open and closed uselessly a few times, like a fish out of water. Unable to form the lies he wouldn’t understand.

“Netka non fa’alsita,” He murmured, “Anha wet.”

I craned my neck back, looking up at him, still quivering. I felt clammy and cold, as if someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over me. But I latched onto the sound of his voice, shaking my head again and bringing my shaking hands to my face. I laid my palms flat against my eyes, attempting to push away whatever dream or memory had so unsettled me. It was in vain; my shoulders shook even more and I felt tears stinging my eyes as my throat began to burn. It was even more unsettling as I had only the fear. I had no memory of what had caused it, which only frightened me even more. I longed to let it sink away with the rest of my life buried in the heavy fog.

I started as I suddenly found myself hoisted delicately from the ground. A moment later, I was enveloped in big, strong arms. Each nearly as thick as I was wide. My hands dropped in time to catch a glint of his copper eyes before Njord buried me in his chest. Creating a safe cocoon of dark green muscle and flesh. He held me firmly, all but forcing my tremors to cease, but also as gently as if I were made of glass. I didn’t bother to try to resist; for one thing, I doubted I could wriggle myself loose from his clutches. For another, I sincerely didn’t want to.

There was no explicable reason why; I didn’t know this man. Hell, I was pretty sure I didn’t even know what he was. And yet I didn’t care. I turned into his broad chest, ensconcing myself in his embrace. I drew in long, deep breaths of his musky scent, and even reached my arms up to wrap around his thick neck.

I felt his posture change as I did, and felt a bolt of electricity shoot down my spine unrelated to the lingering fear. Neither of us chose to acknowledge it though; the feeling we shared in that moment. One that needed no words. He grounded me, like an anchor in a storm, and I clung to him almost desperately for fear of being swept away. There was no space to consider anything else. I squeezed my eyes shut and tightened my grip around him. And slowly, my trembling eased. Then stopped altogether.

I took one last long, deep breath against his skin, then let it out. I started to lean back from his touch, and almost as soon as I did, I felt his arms loosening. I turned my gaze up to his face, and he side eyed me, half turned towards the back of the cave. But the corner of his mouth turned up, and his thick lips curled around his huge tusks.

“Yukna vat.” He said softly, and one big hand came up. With just his thumb, he pushed the long strands of my hair back from my face.

“I’m sorry...” I breathed, even though I knew he couldn’t understand me. 

I shook my head, looking away from him. There was not even a hint of the memory of what had set me off, but I still felt that lingering urge to bolt. To run far and run fast. It left me on edge, and I jumped at the sound of a branch snapping beyond the entrance of the cave. My heart faltered and my breathing skipped.

Njord paid it no mind, and his thumb traced distractedly down the edge of my hairline. “Netka non fa’alsita.” He told me, his deep voice echoing ever so faintly around the cave.

I peered up at him through my pale lashes, frowning slightly. He had said that before. Just after he had first come to my side. I saw him chew his lip thoughtfully, tilting his big head to the side. Seeming to appraise my questioning look.

“Netka non fa’alsita.” He said again, then lifted his hand, tapping the side of his head. He pointed to the bed, and laid his cheek over his knuckles. Closing his eyes. Even giving a few comically loud snores for effect. I felt a smile coming unbidden to my lips as I watched. When his copper eyes opened again, he tapped his temple, then made a deeply unhappy face. “...Netka non fa’alsita.”

I glanced over at the bed. “Neh..tukuh non fall see tah,” I echoed, working my lips around the foreign words.

He gave a grunt that came from somewhere deep in his chest. “NeTKa non fa’ALsita.” He repeated, emphasizing the strange sounds that he seemed to form in his throat rather than his mouth.

“Netka non fa’alsita.” I tried again, and managed a shy semblance of similarity to his.

He nodded approvingly, then made the sour face, reaching out to tap my temple lightly before pointing to the bed. “Netka non fa’alsita, Shikobakin.”

“Nightmare...“ I translated, and took note of the curve of my palms cupped in my lap to avoid minding the shiver that rippled over my skin at his touch.

His big fingers came under my chin, scooping it gently until I met his eye again. Unabashed by our close proximity to each other. Unashamed to brush his skin against mine and meld my warmth with his. I wondered briefly if it was a part of his own personality or a social construct of his species.

“Nit...Niightmaar.”

My smile returned as I recognized his near perfect attempt to mimic me. “You’re better at mine than I am at yours.” I complimented him.

He tilted his head, looking down over his broad cheek at me. Frowning. I wracked my brain for a moment, then nodded my head and smiled.

“Good.” I told him, then exaggerated my smile and nodded again. “Good.”

He considered this, then tipped his own chin at me. “Guh-d.” At my smile, he gave another deep rooted snort. “Ars’tok.” He grinned, showing all of his teeth, and I looked at him in surprise. It changed the shape of his face, and while the teeth themselves were large, set into the exaggerated smile made him an almost laughable sight. “Guh-d. Ars’tok.”

“Ars...TOkKK.” I almost spit at him, trying to make the deep throated accent as he did. It was less like his, however, and sounded more like I was choking on something.

A great booming sound emerged from him at my attempt, blasting into me with powerful reverberation and echoing around the cave. At first I jumped, but so accompanied was the roaring by his honest grin, that I quickly realized I was not in danger. After another belated moment, I realized he was in fact laughing, and felt my face flush.

“Easy for you to mock!” I scoffed, crossing my arms. “You’re apparently a natural at Common.”

His loud laughter subsided into quiet chuckles at my voice, and he lifted up one hand to gently cuff my jaw with his knuckles. He said something in his own tongue that I didn’t catch, but the amusement in his tone was plain. His thumb tapped my chin, and I heard him speak the name he had given me. He said it with a tenderness that surprised me, and made my heart flutter again.

I realized I was still settled in his lap, his big legs as sturdy as any chair. My face flushed for an entirely different reason. I twisted in place, trying to hide the new shade settling across my features and hoping he wouldn’t notice. I could see his head cock slightly out of the corner of my eye, considering my sudden shift.

I reached down and ran my hands over my swollen ankle, using it as an excuse. I winced, for it was still hot to the touch and extremely tender. And perhaps it was my imagination, but it looked more swollen than the day before to me. 

“...Di’chin yiya?” He asked, and I recalled the words from the previous evening.

I wasn’t given time to answer, and gave a soft squeak as he scooped me up into his arms. Again, I reached for something to hold onto, feeling perilously close to falling despite the fact that his arms all but completely engulfed me as he tucked me back to his chest. My own arms ended up back around his neck, and I felt his chest vibrate as he chuckled softly again. If possible, my cheeks began to burn hotter at that. I pretended to be concerned with where we were going, rather than the proximity of his bare chest and thick neck to my face. Not that there were many options.

He swept aside the canvass covering at the entrance with one hand, easily balancing me in the other, then walked over to set me beside the firepit again. He gathered up some more smoked meat, dropping to a cross-legged seat next to me so heavily the ground shook.

“Tikke.” He told me, holding out the fish meat. As I gingerly took it, he pointed to it again. “Tikke. Tikke.”

A wry smile twisted one side of my mouth at the eagerness in his voice. I gestured with the fish, to show him I understood what he meant. I hesitated. The word was not hard, or at least, didn’t seem to be. Yet my previous humiliation was still quite fresh in my mind.

Njord shoved my shoulder gently with his bent fingers. “Tikke!” He pressed, pointing to the meat.

I opted for a shy glance at him out the corner of my eye. “... Tick-key?”

His grin chewed up half his face, at least what I could see of the good side he always kept facing me, and pushed his copper eyes into his heavy brow. He nodded eagerly. “Ars’tok…” Somehow, he found more room for his smile to grow a few molars. “Guh-d.”

I returned his smile, wondering if he was humoring me. I took a bite, chewing it thoughtfully, glancing around. I started slightly as his hand came up, shoving me lightly again. When I turned back to him, he pointed back at the fish. Then gave a grunt, tapping my shoulder before pointing at it again.

My lips split with my fresh smile, and I almost laughed. “Fish.” I told him, holding up the meat.

His brow screwed up, and he moved his lips for a moment before speaking. “Fii-ssh.”

I nodded. “Good.” I held it up again. “Fish.”

“Fisshh. Fii… Fishh.” He repeated, then seemed pleased with himself. I saw him looking around himself as I took another bite of the meat. He picked up a nearby rock, showing it to me. “Wutbat.” He told me.

I did laugh now, and shook my head. He grunted, frowning, and holding up the rock again. He repeated the word, showing me the rock and pointing as well.

“Wutbat.” I echoed, more confidently and trying unsuccessfully to hide my amusement. 

He grunted again and nodded, then tried to pass me the rock. I scrambled to move the remainder of my breakfast to the other hand to take it from him. In his fist it had looked small, but my hand dropped slightly under its weight. He pointed to it, then to me. Gesturing and waving with his hand. My smile never faltered; I could hardly believe my own enjoyment of his eagerness.

“Rock.” I told him.

His eyes lit up. “Rock.” He repeated, without any issues. His long arm reached out, plucking up another and turning it around in his hands. “Rock. Roockk.”

I tossed mine off to the side, wiping my hand on my pants to get off the worst of the dirt. I saw his copper eyes looking around again, and quickly finished off the meat before he could find something else to shove into my hands. He noticed I was finished and stood, walking over to the cave entrance and scooping up his broadsword.

“Oh, please don’t drop that on me,” I begged, still grinning, “It’ll crush me.”

Njord gave one of his deep snorts, tilting his head to the side. His face appeared quizzical, heavy brow lightly scrunched over his broad nose but eyes bright. I wondered if he had a concept of what I had said, or was merely trying to decipher the tone. He shrugged his big shoulders then showed me the sword, twisting it this way and that in his hand. As easily as if it were merely a branch, rather than a few dozen pounds of cold hard iron.

“Sword.” I told him quickly, before he could prompt me. He grinned back at me, and made a few attempts before getting the word right.

“Tu’kegee.” He returned, and spun the sword deftly as if striking down an imaginary opponent.

Hearing the deep sound he produced in his throat to say the word, I shook my head. “Not this again.” I almost groaned.

His grin returned, and he displayed a few more practiced strikes with the blade. “Tu’kegee.” He repeated, then again as he spun and swung the heavy sword at the air behind him.

I was a little awestruck by his movements, and watched quietly. He seemed to enjoy having me as an audience, and executed a few more maneuvers. His big muscles moved with powerful grace, his shoulders exposed without the armor from the previous day. I felt a strange tickling in my chest as I watched, and my fingertips tingled. He repeated the word after each stroke and blow, and after a final, powerful downward sweep which had him using both hands, he settled his copper eyes on me once more. Jerking his square chin at me.

I sighed, rubbing at the back of my neck. “Tuckeggee.” I mumbled, not even bothering to try the throaty sound.

He grinned, digging the end of his sword into the ground and dropping to one knee beside me. “Ars’tok, Shikobakin.”

My breath caught in my throat as I looked up at him, his face only a few inches from mine. I saw him stiffen slightly as well, his smile slowly shrinking as some unknown thoughts drifted through the depths of his copper eyes. He watched me for a second, his eyes moving back and forth between mine. I swallowed, forcing a small smile onto my face.

“I’m not trying that one again.” I murmured. With him so close, I certainly didn’t have to speak loudly.

He studied my face, his lips tweaking slightly as he seemed to attempt to decipher my tone. A few strands of his dark brown hair fell around his eyes, and I had an itch to push them back out of his face. I barely managed to resist. A sonorous grunt came from his chest, soft despite the strength of it. It seemed a good match to my own soft words, as if an answer in and of itself. But he didn’t move, lingering with our breath intermingling in the air between us. After a few breaths like this, his big hand came up, skimming his fingertips along my jaw. I wondered if he had felt that strange tingling to touch me, as I did. I couldn’t explain it, but couldn’t help leaning into his grazing fingers slightly; almost imperceptibly.

There was a distant snap of a branch that broke the moment, and both of us shifted. Pulling away. The sound of the snap was followed by a different, softer sound. It was too strange to place, and I was far too distracted to analyze it.

Another grunt, deeper and louder this time, and he shook his head. Dropping his hand away and standing. He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye, then jerked his head towards the forest. Words of his own language came flowing out from between his thick lips, and I watched them form in a daze as he gathered up his armor and strapped it to each shoulder. I found I liked the way the straps sinched to his chest, and had to slap my cheek lightly to stop myself from staring. He turned at the noise, raising the brow on his good side. I gave him a sheepish smile. No use trying to explain to him that I found him very distracting… I wouldn’t even know how to begin.

He grunted again, coming back over with some grumbling words I couldn’t distinguish. Even if I had the vocabulary to understand them. But short of a discussion about fish, rocks, and bad dreams (and a very brief discussion at that), it was not likely to be a very lively conversation.

The strange sound was louder, pulling my attention back to it. It was a skittering, scritching sound. Filling the air. Like something scurrying around through the leaves. No… many somethings. It seemed more familiar now, and set me on edge. I looked around, one hand reaching for Njord almost nervously. He seemed wary as well, and I found his hand reaching out at the same time as mine. The hairs on the back of my neck shot up, just before hissing, chittering snarls filled the forest around us...

...

To be continued...

[honestlywrites]

Grass Fields | (Sith!Obi-Wan Kenobi x Reader)

Chapter One of Golden Hour

Summary: You recall your life with Obi-Wan, Ben, and how growing up with the Jedi made him the man that he is. 

Masterlist

Your first memory of him was when you were a small child. Running through the tall green grasses and laughing with no worries. Stewjon was a small planet with little to offer but the rich agriculture that grew, providing the beautiful fields that live in your memories. You and Ben would sit deep in the woods across from each other as the two of you explored your newfound powers that could make objects move. With the help of the Force, you would collect pinecones off of the high branches that loomed above, shielding the golden rays of the sun. Birds would sing brilliantly and you would run after them, following the sound of the small creatures that created beautiful songs. All day, the two of you would play until the sun would begin to set over the mountains that sat on the horizon. Yes, nothing did ever happen on Stewjon.

In the evening, your mother would call you for supper and you would hug Ben as tightly as possible, exclaiming how much you would miss him. Ever the gentleman, the young boy would kiss your cheek and bid you goodbye, leaving you with the memory of his cerulean eyes. 

One day, they would match the color of his first lightsaber. 

After supper, you would stay by your window, waiting for Ben to come back and talk to you about the many fishes that his family caught in the streams by his house. He would tell you about the creatures feasting on the small nuts in the trees and could weave beautiful stories with his incredible diction. Your conversations would last until the candle lights would burn out and your mother would grow tired of your chatter, forcing Ben to leave his place by your window. While you always knew you would see him the next day, you would never realize how much you took your time together for granted. It was not long before the Jedi came. 

On a cloudy day, one so unusual for such a bright and sunny planet, a Jedi starship came down from the heavens and landed in the middle of the grassy field, crushing the plant life underneath. You and Ben watched from the edge of the forest, eager to see such a foreign entity enter the planet. Out came two Jedi, soon to be known as Master Yoda and Master Qui-Gon. These two men would speak to your parents in hushed whispers before turning to greet the two of you.

“Obi-Wan, step forward,” Qui-Gon speaks softly, crouching down to meet Ben face to face. You frowned at the usage of his real name, the use of formalities sitting uncomfortably in your mind.

“Have something to say, do you, youngling?” Master Yoda asks and you look up, a deep frown settled into your forehead.

“His name is Ben!” you shout, and run up to your friend, pulling him away from the two foreign men. How right you were for not trusting the Jedi to correctly teach him. They built him up, forcing the two of you apart only to leave him to the dark side. 

Your mother reprimands you, smiling politely at the two men.

“I apologize, the two of them are very close,” she mutters and moves to stand by you, fondly smoothing down your messy head of hair.

“Strong in the force they are,” Master Yoda muses and turns to his compatriot. “Come with us, they must.”

“I agree with my master, these two younglings are far too powerful to not be taken to Coruscant where we can teach them how to use their abilities for good,” Qui-Gon smiles down at the two of you and before you know it, the cabin you grew up in grows smaller as you travel up into the depths of space for the first time. You would never see those lush grasses again, caressing you and reminding you of the simplicity of childhood. 

On the ship ride to Coruscant, you would not leave Ben’s side Your eyes were shut and you were frozen in your place, too afraid to look outside into the darkness. Your hand held his so tightly, the pressure of the bag on your back comforting you as the only tie to your home. It holds only a few items, no toys or trinkets inside. There was no trace of your childhood and no trace of your family.

Coruscant was large in the eyes of a small child. It still is, now that you are grown, but the whole city appeared like a maze even as you landed in the docking bay of the Jedi temple. There, you were whisked away to dormitories. When they forced you to separate from Ben, you did not let him go without a fight and he would not leave you alone with the others. The temple guards had to pull you from him, screaming. Maybe this should have been the first sign. When you entered your room for the first time, you would not come out. No persuasion from any Jedi could get you to leave before they gave in and got Ben to convince you. You were a child ripped from your home, of course you would not trust them. When your best friend appeared in front of your door, dressed in the clothing of the Jedi, it convinced you to change and join him at the mess hall with all the other younglings. The two of you sat alone, secluded and scared of making new friends. Your first day of training would help with this.

Over the many years when you trained as a youngling, your attachment to Obi-Wan began to lessen. You found other friends and were growing into a strong woman who would take on the world, not as a child, but as a Jedi. This did not stop the two of you from eating dinner together every night. Your love for him never waivered either. 

In the cool city nights with the sounds of ships filling the air, the two of you would walk the temple, telling each other stories of the day. Discussing the history of the Jedi as protectors and the vast cultures that the galaxy held. Every night, he would walk you to your room and bid you goodnight with a simple kiss on your cheek. It was your secret, hidden from the others. You would find ways to show your affections and while you knew little of romance, the bond between you was obvious. Hiding in the empty halls and talking to each other, fantasizing about what color lightsaber you wished for, these were the practices of two younglings who fell in love with each other long before they understood what love was. 

As years passed, the time soon came to put together your lightsaber and finally become a padawan learner. You were beckoned to the docking bay and found Master Qui-Gon waiting for you and Obi-Wan. Luckily, it was just the two of you. Boarding the ship was easy enough but once you were strapped in and taking off into the void of space, your childhood fears began to eat away at your stability. The shaking of the ship and the clanging of the metal filled your senses, your hand reaching out to take Obi-Wan’s out of sheer panic. He chuckles softly at the action but does not stop you, even squeezing your hand to provide comfort whenever the ship would jolt. In the cockpit, Qui-Gon notices your shared affections but does nothing to stop it. The moment was private and while he should break them apart to prepare them for the heartbreak of becoming a true Jedi, he too was questioning his practices as a Jedi Knight.

Landing on Ilum was a welcomed feeling as you pulled on a thick woollen coat and stepped down onto the far reaches of this snowy planet. Stepping into the caverns, you stare in awe at the glory of the sacred place, watching as Master Yoda allows the sun inside to melt the ice. Once the ice melted and the natural timer of the planet’s rotation started, you took off into the caves alongside Obi-Wan. Together, the two of you searched through the icy depths, looking for any sign of the specialized crystals. As the time is eaten up, the two of you find yourself at a crossroads.

“We have to split up,” Obi-Wan states, turning to you with worried eyes.

“Okay,” you mutter, looking into the dark depths. “Be safe.”

“You too,” he sighs and turns to look at the tunnel running alongside yours. “Come find me afterwards.”

The two of you take off down your own respective corridors, finding nothing but endless tunnels of ice and crystal. You wander the cave, admiring the beauty of the light that refracts off the different surfaces. As you find yourself going deeper and deeper into the cavern, the light quickly fades and darkness consumes you. Fear engulfs you in a blanket, trapping you inside your mind. The deep pounding of your heart is the only sound that fills your ears, leaving you to your own thoughts. You are isolated from anything and anyone, longing for Obi-Wan’s presence so that he may comfort you. What if you are trapped in the cave for another rotation and are lost forever in the snowy depths? You may die in these caves without telling your friend how much you love him. Screaming Obi-Wan’s name, your voice echoes throughout the tunnels, unable to be heard so deep in the heart of the planet. Your chest rises and falls quickly and you begin to lose sense of direction. The panic consumes your mind for a moment before you reach deep inside to pull from the practices of your training.

Sitting on the ground, you quiet your mind and regulate your breathing, allowing yourself to remain calm. The ice is cool underneath your touch, grounding you in the moment and allowing your senses a moment to breathe and relax. Memories of your childhood fill your mind, taking you away from the cold planet to the warm environment of Stewjaw. It is then when a wall of ice falls beside you and you see Obi-Wan doing the same thing. In the path between the two of you sits two crystals, one yellow and one blue. You stand, staring down at the two sources of light, trying to decipher which one belongs to him and which one belongs to you. When you look up at your close friend, you stare deep into his blue eyes, finding the power hiding behind the ocean. 

“Yours is blue,” you mutter, reaching down to take the blue crystal and hand it to him.

“How do you know?” he asks, holding the shard in between two of his fingers. 

“Your eyes, they’re the same color,” you reach down to pick up yours, frowning at the unusual color. “Only Jedi Temple Guards have this color lightsaber. Does that mean I have to become one of them?”

 Obi-Wan pockets his crystal, reaching down to take your hand in his.

“I don’t think so,” he muses and the two of you begin walking back to the entrance. “Besides, you feel too much to become a Jedi Temple Guard.”

And he was right, you did feel too much. The two of you made your lightsabers together on the ship, finding joy in the creation of an item that is so personal and would serve to protect you for the rest of your years. When you arrived back at the temple, an unwanted surprise was waiting for the two of you. Obi-Wan was quickly assigned to reckless Master Qui-Gon which was odd to you, seeing Obi-Wan go off with a master that was so different from him in all regards. Obi-Wan, while in love with you, followed the Jedi Code precisely, never straying from the rules. If anything, your personality was more suited for Qui-Gon, much more brash and loud. Yet, you were assigned to master Cin Drallig due to your unique lightsaber color. It was then when you were separated from your close friend indefinitely. 

“I will train you in the ways of security and negotiation. It will best suit you and your lightsaber to follow this path,” Master Drallig sets off into the temple with you closely behind.

“And what of Obi-Wan?” you ask, looking back at your friend who stares back at you.

“Don’t worry about him, you are a padawan now. You need to act like one,” he states sternly, souring your mood. While Master Drallig appeared as emotionless as the guards he commanded, you quickly learn about the countless battle strategies and ways of negotiation under him. He teaches you how to choose your words and to duel swiftly, always analyzing your opponent. After years under his teachings, it was easy to form a small attachment to him, but nothing would be as powerful and strong as your love for Obi-Wan.

Throughout your time as a Padawan, you see Obi-Wan less and less. Isolation grows and you find more comfort in the walls of your small room, allowing you to grow as an individual. You focus on your studies, honing your skills and reeling in your reckless nature. One day you will take over the title of Battlemaster and Chief of Security in the absence of your master, it is your duty as a Jedi Sentinel.

After a year of not seeing your close friend, a sharp tug into an empty corner of a corridor has you reaching for your lightsaber. When you are met with the soft eyes of Obi-Wan, your arms instantly wrap around his neck to pull him close to you.

“Obi-Wan! I thought you were on Mandalore protecting the Duchess Satine!” you exclaim, pulling back to look over him, checking mindlessly for injuries or signs of wear.

“The threat was terminated so we got to return home earlier,” he states and you sigh, breathing in the simple smell of clean cotton and wood. It was the smell of him, the smell of home. Staring deep into his eyes, only then do you realize how close he is to you. The two of you breathe the same air and you can feel the soft puff of his exhale against your reddened cheeks. Your eyes break from his only to look down at his lips, it does not stop him from wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling your lips to his. His lips were soft and his entire being engulfed yours, his body against yours warming your entire being. After several moments, you pull away only to catch your breath. He stares down at you with a smile tugging at the edges of his lips.

“I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” he mumbles and you let out a small huff, touching your forehead to his.

“You should have done it earlier, Ben,” his old nickname rolls off your tongue and you smile, pressing a small peck to his lips once more.

“I know,” he breathes in deeply before pressing his lips to yours once again. You welcomed his presence with open arms, allowing your mind to be open to his. Your soul intertwines with his bright blue one, creating a bright green connection through the force. It was beautiful and pure, untainted by the light and dark side. The two of you simply existed together, in love.   

Your first kiss was warm and secretive, hidden away in an alcove as a memory only shared between the two of you. This would be your first and last kiss with Obi-Wan before you lose him. 

It was a normal day. The sun was shining down on Coruscant, lighting up the many metallic buildings in the city-planet that you called home. You wake up to the soft whirring of the ships gliding through the skies, unaware of the peril that Obi-Wan is in. Staring out the window longer than usual, you reminisce about his last visit. You miss his presence and ability to talk like children, your mind wondering how different your life would have been if you had been a simple civilian. If you had no idea of the force then maybe you would still be on Stewjon, farming up plots of land and worrying about the next harvest that would feed your family. If you had a family. With Ben. 

The loud reverberations of the speeders that ride past your window break you out of your fantasies, reminding you that your life as a Jedi still remains and that your love for Obi-Wan is forbidden. After dressing for the day, you leave your chamber to meet with your master at the dining hall. You would never make it to the end of the corridor. 

Your knees buckle under you as a scream of anguish fills your mind, the vision of Obi-Wan crying above his master playing like a hologram in your mind. Rage fills your lover, consuming him with hatred and sadness. You want to reach out to him, to hold him and tell him that everything will be alright. The event transpiring makes no sense to you, yet all your thoughts are consumed by your lover and his loss of Qui-Gon. Years ago you may not have expected it, but the bond between a master and a padawan is one that holds a special place in the hearts of all Jedi Knights. You feel for him, understanding the situation. Yet, through your fantastical ministrations, you fail to see the bright yellow eyes that shine under the hood of Obi-Wan’s robe.

When he stands, he utilizes the force to call his weapon to him, and you stare up at your lover, waiting to see what he does next. The lightsaber is activated and the blue light illuminates the room but as he holds it in his hand, you hear the screams he unleashes, focusing his emotions into the weapon. You watch the beautiful blue kyber crystal break apart into an untamed red, tainting the light. The crimson glow highlights his yellow eyes that stare directly at you before you faint onto the rug below. 

Obi-Wan was gone and your chest had never felt so hollow. 

Tag List: @batsdothings

[sweet-sammy-kisses]

Fallen Bird

Make the World Bleed Chapter 1: Fallen Bird Fandom: DC Comics/Red Robin/Batman/Young Justice Pairings/Characters: Conner/Tim/Jason, Bruce/Clark/Diana, Core Four, Cassandra & Tim, Dick & Tim, Dick & Damian, Bruce & Tim, Tim & his Assassin Trio Summary: The Core Four have a bond that will never break, will never fade. When one of their own is hurt by someone who should be family to them the other three respond in force. When Tim's line is cut and he is seriously injured Conner, Bart and Cassie are ready to declare war against anyone who stands in their way of helping Tim, even if that means making a devil with the Devil himself, Ra's Al Ghul.  Author Notes: Written for the @badthingshappenbingo my prompt: falling from great heights. I love stories that deal with Damian cutting Tim’s grappling line and the fallout and aftermath that and my love of the Core Four turning into their dark selves this because one of their own is injured by someone is supposed to be family.  You can also read it on AO3

There were few things Tim Drake loved more than flying through the Gotham night sky as Robin and even though he was no longer Robin, something that still left a deep ache he refused to let the loss of Robin take away his wings and he was finally finding his place soaring as Red Robin.

Gotham was once a place that Tim called home. Once he thought he had found a family but the feeling of home and family were nothing but seemed in the distant past.

No longer could he call Wayne Manor or the Penthouse home. Nor could he call the other Bat's family.

He had realized that the hard way that he no longer belonged or he had never really been a part of the Wayne family.

Tim could feel himself on the edge there was only so much more he could take from Damian, only his team, Cassandra and surprisingly Helena saw how much the abuse was getting to him and the fact that he was just to turn the other cheek was slowly breaking him.

None of them could understand why the adults in Damian's life never once thought to take him aside and explain why he can't treat Tim the way he does. Not one of them set bounders for him. They reprimanded Tim because as the older of the two he should know better. And it was getting to the point that even Raven and Gar, who Tim didn't want them to get involved due to their strong bond with Dick, were reaching their breaking point. Several times they had to stop Raven from tossing the Bat-family into a hell dimension in their underwear.

Helena, Conner and Bart had been all for that idea and it was only because Tim begged her not to did Raven back down.

"If they keep placing the blame on you for Damian's actions I will do it," Raven warned, her normally warm eyes blazing with rage. Raven's vow whispered through Tim's mind.

No, shoving those thoughts to the back of his head Tim lost himself in something he loved.

Tim loved flying between the buildings it was one of his favourite things as a hero. His grapple line gave him a sense of freedom.

Freedom from the tension in the cave.

Freedom from the feeling that he didn't belong in the cave.

Freedom that he had lost a second family.

Then he heard it, something that shouldn't be happening not with a Bat-approved grapple the snapping of his line.  

Tim only had seconds to hear the snap before he was falling. "Conner!" He knew that he could count on him, his best friend who kept his promise that he would always be listening to his heartbeat.

But deep in his heart, he knew that it was going to be too late. 'Please Conner don't blame yourself.' Tim pleaded before darkness claimed him.

The pure terror in Tim's voice will haunt Conner 'Kon' Kent for the rest of his days as will his guilt for being a second too late in catching Tim. Looking at the broken boy of his best friend Conner felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest.

Pressing his comm to the rest of the Titans, "Guys you need to get to Gotham." Conner didn't care that his voice wobbled there was no way that he could stay strong or even pretend that everything was alright, nothing would be alright after this.

"Dude, what is wrong Conner? You are scaring me here." Bart's worried voice came over the line. It wasn't often that Conner would suggest that they break Batman's no meta in Gotham's rule. There was only one reason he would do so.

Bart's worse fears were confirmed when Conner whispered, "It's Tim, he's hurt badly."

Only the movement of his hair alerted Conner to Bart's arrival.

"Oh god." Bart felt like he was going to be sick at the sight he arrived at, he and the others had always been protective over Tim as he was the only human on their team but the one time he truly needed them and they failed him.

"I'm going to kill whoever did this." Bart snarled out, Tim was family and he would do everything in his power to keep those he loves safe.

"First we need to get Tim's help." Whoever did this will pay but getting Tim's aid comes first.

+******+

It was no secret among the Bat-family that there was a rivalry between the two youngest sons Timothy Drake-Wayne and Damian Wayne.

Richard "Dick" Grayson had hoped that they would grow out of it, he couldn't understand why Tim couldn't see that as being Damian's older brother he was to not let Damian's words get to him. Damian had come from the League of Assassins and his abusive upbringing was all he knew. Of course, he was going to lash out and Tim to Damian was an easy target.

Tonight Tim had let Damian get to him once again and stormed out of the cave, Dick only hoped that when he returned he was willing to apologize to Damian.

Jason Todd was fighting the urge to slam some heads together and at the top of his list is Dickie and the smug brat Damian. He had heard from Cass and Helena that things were pretty bad when it came to Tim and Damian and how Damian was allowed to get away with everything while Tim took the blame.

Yeah, he had tried to kill the kid, something that Jason hasn't forgiven himself for. He had allowed Talia to twist him up and he took it out on the one person who didn't deserve his rage. Tim might have forgiven him but he did and Dick sure as hell didn't. So he couldn't understand why Dick was allowing the demon brat to emotionally, verbally and physically abuse Tim and stay silent when he saw it first hand or got angry when Tim defended himself.

'For someone who claims to love family, he sure has proven that he can only love one brother at a time.' Jason felt for Tim. He was trying to be there for Tim but it was a work in progress.

It just baffled him and pissed him off that Bruce, Dick, Alfred, Stephanie and Barbara never once questioned why they allowed Damian to get away with treating Tim like he was trash. Why they never spoke up when Damian time after time told Tim that he wasn't wanted, that he wasn't part of the family. Why Damian sought to kill Tim and only Tim. Jason just hoped that they would wake up before it was too late.

It turned out it was too late.

For all of his skills, Damian found he couldn't move as the speedster kept him pinned to the wall, one hand wrapped around his throat the other vibrating right above his heart, "One wrong move and I vibrate my hand through your chest and into your heart." Bart Allen hissed, his happy-go-lucky personality replaced by a hardened man with no mercy left.

Damian refused to show any fear for that was a sign of weakness and he was anything but weak.

No help was coming as Cassie Sandsmark had Stephanie wrapped up in her lasso, she looked every inch of the Amazonian warrior she is.

Richard had his hands full with an enraged Superboy who was out for pure blood and Raven along with Huntress were keeping his father and Todd busy.

'I always knew that she was not to be trusted.' Damian thought bitterly at the betrayal from someone that was supposed to be one of their own. "I have no idea what you want but I suggest that you let me go and vacate the cave as well as Gotham and I might not seek revenge."

Bart's eyes burned with untamed rage, "Of course you would threaten violence for all the claims that you have changed you still fall back on old habits and isn't hurting Tim tonight enough for you? Or do you wish to stain your hands with blood some more?" Bart hissed at him.

Dick who was close enough to hear was confused, "What happened to Timmy?"

"Don't act like you don't know! You let this happen!" Conner snarled as he felt his eyes heating up and oh how he wanted nothing more than to unleash his heat beam on those who had harmed his Tim.

"Conner, I need you to calm down. I'm sure that Damian didn't mean for this to happen." Dick pleaded he needed to make Conner as well as himself believe that was true that Damian hadn't meant to hurt Tim. "I'm sure if we could talk to Tim we can clear this all up."

"Lies!" Conner hissed out, "This isn't the first time that little demon has tried to kill Tim and because he was never told by you Bruce or Alfred that killing Tim was wrong he found it acceptable and kept trying and now he has succeeded in seriously harming Tim. You are to blame as much as he is because you never took the time to explain that Tim is very much as a family as he is and Tim has the right to feel safe in his own home! Tim is fighting for his life right now because none of you had the balls to tell that demon spawn that killing is wrong!"

Damian froze a flicker of fear as Conner's words vibrated around the cave and all moment stopped.

Dick was sure that for a second his heart had stopped beating, "What do you mean?"

"I mean that Tim screamed my name as he fell knowing that I would always be listening for him if he needed me. I found my best friend's broken body laying on the ground. Bart found the cut zip line and Helena got Vic to look at the footage and what he found proved all of our fears Damian cut Tim's line, he fell because of him!"

Cassandra Cain was torn, she loved her family but Tim, Tim was special he was her little brother, her little bird, the one who never gave up on her and the first one to trust her.

"Hurt brother. Cannot forgive. Cannot trust. " It hurt Cass to say those words but she knew deep in her heart it was true.

Nodding his head Jason crossed his arms over his chest, "I agree with princess here. I knew this family was messed up but hell letting me then the demon spawn tries and kill replacement without consciences is a new low. At least I did my best to make amends with Timmy, and for some reason, he found it in his heart to forgive me."

"You were his big brother, the first one to believe in him and you turned your back on him." It was Helena's words that cut Dick to the core.

"Don't bother looking for Tim, he is somewhere safe and you will never see him again," Conner growled. Bart and Cassie stood united with him. They had once seen a future where they turned dark, where they crossed lines and for Tim, they were willing to do that now.

If it meant taking on Batman, his family and the whole Justice League they would do so in a heartbeat to keep Tim safe.

[lippskinn]

Limit to Love

Pairing: Sirius x Remus 

Rating: R 

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Warnings: Angst, Medical Conditions, Starvation, Nudity

The bear-like dog trotted down a narrow road in the Yorkshire Dales. It had crossed miles of barren land and had finally reached the last stretch of the journey. Tired and hungry, it dragged itself up to the stone cottage on top of the hill. The place looked uninhabited and resembled more of a sheep shelter than a house; roof tiles were strewn across the land and the door was boarded up with planks of thick wood. As the dog reached the door, it barked, and as the door opened, a familiar face welcomed it. Once inside, the dog turned into a man.

The cottage looked slightly bigger on the inside. It had only one room with a tiny kitchen. The bathroom was separated from the rest of the space by a curtain to grant a bit of privacy. Everything was tidy yet worn; most things were held in place by duct tape, and Sirius noticed the claw and bite marks on the furniture. Remus apologized repeatedly for the state of his house, but Sirius was simply glad to have a roof above his head; anything was better than the cold cave in the Highlands.

The journey South had quite literally eaten him up. The famished human before Remus was much skinnier than the man he had hugged in the Shrieking Shack (if that was even possible). Sirius looked beyond exhausted, yet desperate to tell Remus what had happened at the Triwizard Tournament. Something about Harry, Voldemort, Mad-Eye Moody and a dead student. He had such trouble focusing, however, that none of it made sense.  

When Remus offered Sirius to sit down, he almost collapsed on the couch, stretched out his limbs, closed his eyes, heaved a sigh and fell asleep on the spot. He had mustered his last bit of energy to reach the house. Remus stroked his head and cheek and put a strand of hair back behind his ear. He watched Sirius’ chest lift and lower. The old prison uniform hung so loosely on his body that Remus could see every single rib protrude from under the tightly stretched, scaly skin covered in scabs and dirt. A whiff of dried faeces, wet dog and putrid breath surrounded him. His head fell back onto the couch’s backrest, and his mouth gaped wide open. The sounds he made reminded Remus of a dementor drawing closer; the rattling and laboured breath.

Remus figured he wouldn’t wake up anytime soon and wrapped him in a blanket for the night. He gently lifted Sirius’ arms, which were about the size of walking sticks, and tugged the blanket under them. Despite their feather-light weight, the joins were stiff, and they were difficult to move. Remus feared he would break them if he moved them too much. He tried to take off the boots as well; completely removed the laces, widened them and then carefully pulled on them as the full sole came off with it. There were no socks left. His feet were bare and covered in black blisters and lesions. Remus gagged.

He carried what was left of the boots with two fingers, threw them in a bin bag, washed his hands and face, took a deep breath, and checked on Sirius again. He looked like an old man on his deathbed; cheeks hollow, skin stretched tightly over the face, thin nose and sunken eyes.  If Remus hadn’t been notified that Sirius was going to visit, he would not have recognized him. He’d been desperate to reconnect with his best friend but felt slightly repulsed by the state of him and at the same time worried he wouldn’t make the night.

So, Remus found himself tiptoeing around him all night. Always alarmed as soon as he made a sound; checked his breath, checked his pulse, watched him closely and added as many blankets as possible. An electric jolt ripped through his intestines every time Sirius coughed and sighed in his sleep keeping him awake until the early morning hours.

That morning, Sirius woke up early with Remus still resting on his shoulder. He stretched, gave Remus a kiss on his forehead, and got up to make some tea for the pair. Finally, Remus was woken by the sound of the kettle whistling, pushed off the pile of blankets, and joined Sirius, who was reading yesterday’s newspaper, at the table. Remus had a slightly lopsided gait and slumped down on the chair as he got to the table. He gave Sirius a wry smile and thanked him as he poured a cup.

“It’s the first time you’re staying for breakfast”, he joked moving in his chair visibly in pain.

“Just ignore my groaning. It will go away eventually,” he added seeing the worried look on Sirius’ face, “did you sleep well?”

“It was the most comfortable in a long while”, Sirius smirked and eyed Remus over the edge of his cup. He made a sound like a suppressed laugh and put his cup down. Remus noticed he’d been making the same sound throughout the night. “Thanks for letting me stay.”

When Remus got the letter from Dumbledore that Sirius was on the way to his home, there was no doubt about letting him stay whatsoever. Their last meeting, a year ago, had ended abruptly and they had not had time to talk. Now, that he was Sirius was awake, Remus hoped to learn a bit more about the events.

“I was waiting for an article in the paper but all they wrote was that Cedric died in the tournament”, said Remus pointing at the paper Sirius was reading, “they dismissed it as an accident.”

“The Prophet has always been a pile of rubbish”, scoffed Sirius, “that Barnabas Cuffe has his nose so deep in Fudge’s bum, he can smell what Fudge had for breakfast.”

“I’m sure Fudge will do anything in his power to lull the public. They cannot afford to admit that Voldemort has returned. Not after they let you escape.”  

“Frankly, I couldn’t care less. Let the whole ship go down and Fudge with it,” Sirius took another sip from his mug and set it down a little too hard. Something seemed to fall shut behind Sirius’ eyes. He stared at the cup in front of him for a couple of seconds, licked his lips and then seemed to snap out of it again. “Fudge only cares about a good article in the papers. He’d never do what’s right if it gave him a bad rep.”

“Do you think it will be like last time?”

Sirius seemed to ponder his answer. He scratched his beard, took another sip from his cup, waited a long time to swallow and said, “No.”

“Did Dumbledore tell you anything?”

“He sent me here. It’s not like I’ll be much of help, anyway, is it?”

Remus felt the strong urge to hug Sirius but all that came out of his mouth was, “I think you should rest. Take a shower, eat something, sleep. Dumbledore won’t be here before midnight and he’ll be happy to know I didn’t let you starve.”

“Do you still keep the chocolate in your nightstand?”

“There’s a limit to love, “Remus got up and put his cup in the sink, “I need to go to town. You have the whole place to yourself. Enjoy yourself. Not too much.”

“This is the happiest I’ve been in years.”

Remus smiled and a distinctive crease formed on his forehead. He turned away from Sirius, breathed out and in and limped over to the wardrobe where he’d hung a suit the night before. Sirius watched him take off his pyjamas. Nothing he hadn’t seen before and yet he couldn’t help but stare. His chest was covered in pink and white scar tissue and his body looked like someone who had worked heavy, manual labour all his life.

“Since when are you wearing suits?”, asked Sirius, “I thought suits were for posh people?”

“Since I am a registered werewolf and might have lied to my landlord about a steady income.”

“Is that your business in town?”

Remus froze, dropped his pants and then swiftly pulled them up, “I’m going to the store. Do you need anything?”

“A pair of new boots. Mine magically vanished overnight.”

“What boots?”, laughed Lupin, grabbed a heavy key and opened the door, “I’ll be back soon.”

Sirius watched Remus limp down the hill to the main road. As far as he could tell, it must have been an hour on foot to the closest town. Once Remus had turned left and disappeared behind a stone wall, Sirius cleaned the kitchen table and sat down on a chair. Although he'd only just woken up, he felt overpowering tiredness and his arms felt heavy. He was torn between hunger and sleep and couldn't decide if he wanted to raid the fridge or crawl under a blanket. He stared down on his feet and picked at the remaining fabric of his socks. With one tug, the cotton crumbled and he removed the tatters. His ankles were swollen and he noticed how much his feet were hurting from the journey. Every step felt like walking on eggshells. He rubbed his legs and decided that a bath would probably be best while Remus was gone.

Sirius poured himself a scorching hot bath and steam filled the whole house. He slipped out of his prison uniform and carefully sank into the water. It was as if layers of dirt were peeling off his body and he suddenly felt feather-light. He closed his eyes, leaned back and enjoyed the warmth. Every inch of his body ached as the water turned muddy. Soon the overbearing tiredness returned, he rested his head on the edge and let himself soak in the water. Sleep had won.

The next thing he knew was a wet and frantic Remus rubbing his chest with a towel. He was lying naked on the floor in front of the bathtub, his back propped against Remus legs whose jacket was dripping wet.

"How long have you been in there? I was away for three hours."

Sirius shivered. The last thing he remembered, he'd poured himself a nice warm bath. Remus had dropped the groceries by the door when he hadn't received a reply from Sirius. He'd dragged him out of the cold bathwater by his arms and put him on the floor to check if he was still alive.

"You could have drowned!"

Remus aggressively dried the rest of Sirius' body, wrapped him in a blanket and leaned him against the tub.

"I fell asleep", murmured Sirius drowsily.

"The water is ice cold", Remus put a finger in the muddy water and then removed the strands of wet hair from Sirius' face, "you could have died." Remus pulled himself up by the tub and pulled the plug. He gave Sirius the towel to cover himself and cleaned out the remaining dirt in the tub. He then walked over to the door where he’d dropped the groceries, collected them, placed them on the kitchen table and took off his wet jacket. “I’ll make us some tea and then we’ll start another attempt at making you look presentable. You look like the last survivor of a hunger strike.”

Remus gave Sirius a hand to pull him up; the towel slipped off him, and Sirius stood naked and shivering in front of Remus. He had a nasty scar on his shoulder, which Remus immediately identified as a werewolf bite. Remus shook his head, bit his lip and said, “Sit down.” He helped Sirius sit down on the edge of the tub, took the showerhead, turned on the water and felt the temperature with his hand. “Lean back, I’ll hold you.” Remus had rolled up his sleeves not to get wet and held Sirius with one arm while rinsing his hair with his other free hand. Sirius was still shivering, he had closed his eyes and let the water run over his head. The hair was matted and brittle; steaks washed down the drain as Remus tried to untangle them.

“We might have to try some of James’ hair brews or you’ll have to let me cut it off”, suggested Remus.

“There’s a limit to love, Remus.”  

[randomfandomimagine]

Soul of a Warrior. Chapter 4: Before The Dawn

Fandom: The Witcher

Ship: Jaskier x Nissa (OC)

Previous Chapter - Chapter Index - Next Chapter

AO3

A/N: If you’re enjoying it, please let me know!! Leave a comment and remember to reblog, it’s really important to me! :D

The cut in my arm burns slightly. We have properly mended our wounds and changed our bandages, but the reminder of that battle at the top of the mountain sticks with us. As we walk, the silence is suffocating me. The atmosphere feels cold and tense. Because of me. I can’t stop thinking about all the things I said. They treated me so kindly yet I lost my temper when I saw Jaskier carrying the dagger. After the myriad of emotions from yesterday, even he is quiet. The lack of his endless ranting feels like a blessing as it gives me the chance to breathe and understand my own state. At the same time, however, it leaves an emptiness floating in the air. The thought that they might resent me for bursting out troubles me.

“Uh... Yesterday...” I suddenly pipe up. My meek voice surprises even myself. Clearing my throat, I try again, this time with more confidence. “I didn’t mean to get angry, I just…”

The two of them exchange a look for a moment before turning to me. Our slow yet steady advance halts as we seize each other up.

“There’s something more, isn’t it?” Jaskier replies, sounding more serious than ever. “There’s a story behind that dagger”

I peer up at him, and the graveness in his eyes makes me uncomfortable. I suddenly miss his jokes and endless rambles. For a moment, I wish he could lighten up the mood as usual. Even if it would be for naught. Unable to hold his gaze, I turn to Geralt instead. He is silent, attentive and slightly alarmed. He only looks at me, waiting to see what I say or do next.

“It’s not fair to hide it from you” I plop down in a nearby boulder and feel the anxiety creeping up to me, setting in my chest. “Not when we’re traveling together”

My hands are shaking, but I put them to my face when I feel completely overwhelmed.

“Is someone after you?” The witcher asks, much calmer than last time.

I sigh as I drop my hands in my lap and stare at him. The intensity of his eyes is upsetting, so I look at the ground instead. I already feel out of breath, even before I start speaking.

“I don’t think they are, or they would have found me by now” Too restless to be still, I begin playing with my hands. “It happened eight years ago”

Kader smiled at me, hopeful and excited as always. I followed my brother to the path that led to the mountain, being as curious as him about what we could find there. A treasure? One of those magnificent creatures he always talked about? It was a mystery that we couldn’t wait to unveil. His eagerness was only infectious as it took over me and energized me.

“Catch up, Nissa!” He urged me, walking back to me.

“Yes, yes” I laughed out loud when he positioned himself behind me and pushed me forward. “Stop it, I’ll walk faster”

“Please do” His grin lingered, so bright that it nearly dazzled me. “I can hardly wait!”

“You might have to, though” I pointed to the sky as it grew darker above our heads.

Kader pouted, knowing I was right. We had been walking for a long time, and it wasn’t wise to keep going even though night slowly fell over us. We needed to make camp and wait until the following day to continue our ascent.

“Fine” He sighed in annoyance, stomping his feet as he went to look for a place good enough to rest. “But to be honest, I’m not sure I’ll be able to sleep”

I chuckled as I calmly followed after him. Curiosity and excitement bubbled within me, but not nearly as intensely as him. Catching up with him, I linked my arm with his and showed him a radiant smile. Kader eyed me carefully, realizing he might not like what I would say next.

“Behave like an adult, Kade” I told him between giggles. “You’re supposed to be the old one”

“How am I supposed to when there might be a dragon awaiting us?”

I smiled as he began talking about those magnificent creatures. He was never this loud and outspoken, but our quest was exhilarating for him. He kept speaking, wondering whether we would encounter a green one or we would be fortunate enough to witness a red or black dragon, perhaps even a gold one. I wasn’t as optimistic and settled for a green one in my mind, if there was a dragon to begin with. Nonetheless, I kept those thoughts to myself not to ruin his enthusiasm.

Happy to hear his rare endless talking, I settled down on the ground as soon as I found a place I deemed soft, sheltered and comfortable enough. Kader followed after me, fidgeting even after sitting next to me. I was tired from all the walking and my eyelids felt heavy already, but he might indeed not catch a blink at all.

_

When I woke up, the gentle sunlight welcomed me. The fire we made was extinguished. I idly stretched, conflicted between my laziness and the thrill of the adventure. However, I found myself alone in the camp. There was no sight of Kader.  I immediately stood up, feeling restless in my newfound solitude.

“Kade?” I called him, hearing my own voice echoing in the woods. “Kader?!”

Part of me hoped he didn’t go on ahead without me, but the other one knew him well enough to assume he did. Curiosity must have gotten the best of him and I was sure he decided to take a peek. We were close enough to the top to quickly go and back again. But he hadn’t returned yet, how long was he away?

A hunch grew in my chest and I decided to go look for him. Unwilling to get carried away by that irrational feeling, I reminded myself that he was probably okay... just gotten hold back by something quite silly. Like a beautiful flower that he would pick up to apologize for scaring me. He always loved wandering around fields and meadows to be surrounded with beautiful flowers and calming scents.

I ran as quickly as my legs would carry me. The ascent was unforgiving at such a fast pace and I had to stop for air several times. As I advanced, paused and then continued again and again, my mind raced. All worst case scenarios played in my head, each worse than the last. Adamant, I reminded myself of the flower. Of the sweet apologetic smile he would dedicate me. Of his excuses and childlike excitement as he explained what he saw. Of how he would take my hand and restlessly pull at me until I was there to see everything for myself.

When I reached the peak, I could see a big opening leading to a deep cave. The silence was deafening, bringing a dark omen to my heart. The inside of the cave was so mysterious and mesmerizing that it seemed to be pulling me in. Nonetheless, the anguish never let off.

“K-Kader?” I dared to whisper, although not too loud. I could sense danger, or perhaps I only feared it.

A sudden sound made me jolt up, but when I calmed down I realized I knew what it was. A horse neighing. Our horse?

“Pal” I recognized the chestnut horse hurrying my way and closing the distance between us.  He immediately nuzzled my shoulder, stomping his hooves in distress. I caressed his head with shaky hands, feeling tears of anticipation filling my eyes. If Pal was there freely roaming on his own, where was Kader? Where was my brother?!

I absently patted Pal’s neck and decided to venture into the cave. The shift in temperature hit me as I immersed myself in it, shielded from the warm sunlight and being welcomed by a cold humid air instead.

“Kader?” I called out again, and this time I received a response other than my own echo. Just not his.

“Who’s there?” A loud deep voice replied. From the shadows erupted a tall figure. I faltered before the new presence in front of me.

He had golden eyes and a scowl in his face. A dark and mysterious aura surrounded him. Kader had told me enough about witchers to recognize one on sight. He was definitely one of them, though not quite like I expected, not as heroic or visibly kind. Not as willing to help. He seemed rather inconvenienced in fact.

“I-I’m…” I gulped, just then noticing the bloody sword he so carelessly carried. “I’m looking for my brother, he’s… a bit taller than me, with light curly brown hair and…”

“You’re too late” The witcher saved his weapon on the sheath on his back. His expression didn’t change, not even when I let out a strangled noise.

“What…?” I uttered, searching his face for an ounce of empathy, but found none.

“He’s dead” He insisted, moving to the side to reveal the truth. I blanked when I saw Kader lying motionlessly on the ground. It was him indeed... on a puddle of blood. It took my mind several seconds to comprehend what my eyes were witnessing.

I didn’t understand how I didn’t collapse. How my knees didn’t buckle beneath me. My thoughts did freeze, as well as my body. I wanted to throw myself forward to prove the witcher wrong. My brother wasn’t dead, just hurt. He would be okay, he always was. He always smiled through the pain, because he was that strong. That time was no different.

“If you’re wondering what happened” The mutant said in a deadpan voice. “He meddled in where he shouldn’t have”

“W-What?”

“He was at the wrong place at the wrong time”

He didn’t give me any further attention as he began walking away. I wanted to stop him, to hold his arm and beg him to help me. To heal Kader, to bring him back, anything! Tell me who did it or… Wait, did he…? Was the witcher responsible? Who killed my brother?!

I snapped out of my daze and ran to his lying form. My stomach churned, yet my eyes were fixed on his motionless body. The rough surface of the cave’s ground scrapped my knees as I dropped next to him. His eyes were open, devoid of any brightness they previously carried. Dry blood covered his mouth, neck and chest. A terrible wound was on his stomach, the one that allegedly killed him.

My mind began racing even further. I weakly shook his shoulder, even knowing it wouldn’t make a difference. Of course, Kader didn’t respond. He never would. I would never speak with him again. Hear him ranting about amazing creatures and witchers and far off places. All those adventures were pointless without him. Everything was pointless without him.

I sharply breathed in, crumpling the material of his shirt in my hand, helplessly shaking him again. Why couldn’t he have waited for me? Why did he have to leave me alone?

Sobs escaped my throat as a knot formed in there, so tight that it didn’t let me breathe. Hot tears cascaded down my face, draining me and leaving me numb. I dropped backwards to the ground, sitting there helplessly. No matter how hard I cried, I found no comfort. A void settled in my chest, one that I felt would accompany me for the rest of my life. A far too heavy burden.

Aimlessly seeking anything to help me, I desperately glanced around the cave. It was then when I noticed the dead dragon. Its green scales were pale and lacking any of its former glory. Was that the witcher’s doing too? Did he kill both the creature and my brother?

An unharmed dragon egg lay close to the corpse. Apparently, the creature died protecting their own. Nothing made sense to me, because the witcher code forbid slaying dragons. Did that witcher kill my brother to defend the creature? Even though Kader would never hurt them?

A sudden rage warmed the coldness that had been left within me. Peering at the interior of the cave, my eyes fell over a weapon discarded on the ground. I picked it up from the spot next to him. It was filled with blood… it had to be the murder weapon.

I stared at the dagger in my hand, memorizing the golden handle and the small gems etched there, the curve of the blade and how it shone despite being stained in crimson.

Not knowing why, I looked back at my brother through my vision blurred by the tears. There were no claw marks on his body, only that stab wound. It wasn’t the dragon. Still, a monster did it. Even if that monster was a human. Or a mutant.

I clutched the dagger so tightly in my hand that my nails formed painful crescent marks on my palms. I sat there for a long time, dazed and immersed in my tangled thoughts. How was I to live with that loss? With that emptiness?

_

I look at my hands, almost like I can still see the blood staining them. Kader’s blood. My brother’s blood. I survived, he didn’t.

“Oh…” Jaskier’s low murmur brings me back to the present. “So that’s the story behind the dagger…”

“I’m sorry” The witcher mutters scarcely. I do not look at him.

My eyes are wet and hope that I have shed no tears. Cautious, I glance at them. Geralt is considerate enough not to watch me, but Jaskier is staring. His eyes seem to burn holes into my face.

“What?” I’m not sure I can take his pity, his condolences and sadness. Nonetheless, there seems to be only awe in Jaskier’s gaze.

“You have the soul of a warrior” The bard utters. “You kept on living, even after that traumatic day… You never surrendered”

“What was I supposed to do instead? Die as well?” I shake my head, biting my lip when I feel wetness in my cheeks. I angrily wipe the tears away and avert my gaze. “The only thing I could do was move on and continue living”

“But... you could have turned bitter…” Jaskier retaliates. “All that pain, and it only made you kind”

“I…” Having it so recent, I refuse to cry disconsolately like I did yesterday. A part of me is also frightened that if I start shedding the tears I have been holding back for years, I might never stop crying. “It was as though Kader watched over me still. He would have wanted me to…”

I shrug, not truly knowing what I want to say. Perhaps it only sounds stupid and a pathetic comfort for a poor girl maddened by grief. That confusion of feelings return, and not even I myself can identify them. There are far too many to pinpoint each one.

“He would have wanted you to be happy” Jaskier utters in a breathless whisper. ��Even without him”

I nod, doing my best to focus on everything else but my emotions, like on how far they are from me, keeping the distances as though I need a lot of room to breathe. My feet are idly dragging on the ground and hence I make a conscious effort not to. I don’t even remember when I stood up. At what point in my narration did I start walking?

And suddenly, I see it. The town is upon us. We have arrived. Jaskier turns to me, moving his head to look from the destroyed wasteland that now is my home town and returning to me. Avoiding eye contact, I take a few steps closer.

The smell of thick smoke and ashes is pungent in the air even though all fire has been completely extinguished. There are no signs that show the dragon stayed. The dead silence makes me think of the noisy state this town used to be in. People walking, children laughing and running, horses galloping. The clinking sounds of the tavern. The smells that filled the place, now all overpowered by the scent of everything burnt. The murmur of voices intertwining in the bar. Hana’s voice. Kind, stubborn and mature.

When a hand captures my arm, I grow aware of my erratic breathing.

“That’s enough” Geralt declares, tugging at me. “Let’s turn back”

I nod in a daze, fearing I might collapse if he drops my arm. Luckily, he doesn’t.

Once more I leave home behind, this time probably forever. It isn’t a home anymore. It has been reduced to nothing, to literal ashes. There is not a thing left, not a soul. Only that emptiness that mirrors the one inside my chest.

I absently go where Geralt takes me, trusting him enough to choose the path for me. Where he’s going, I don’t know. I only follow like a shell of a person. I’m reminded of the other presence next to me when Jaskier’s arm brushes against mine. I hadn’t realized he walked so closely by my side.

“If you don’t mind me asking…” He pipes up, quieting for a moment to clear his throat. “How was Kader?

“Huh?”

“Your brother, what was he like?”

“He…” I smile at the thought of him, even if it’s partly a sad gesture. “He was older than me, but sometimes he behaved like my younger brother. He always managed to make me smile”

“That’s nice” Jaskier grins sweetly, and the sight comforts me slightly.

“He was so very kind too…” As I have been for years, I try to focus on his memory instead of his painful absence. “I had never met someone as thoughtful and selfless”

“Sounds like a good man” Geralt says too, slowly dropping my arm now.

Boy. At twenty-two, he was just a boy still when he died.

“He was shy and quiet most of the time. Truly, he was a child at heart” The sound of his pure laughter echoes in my mind, one that I hope I never forget. “All he ever wanted was to see some dragons… At least, he got to see one, before…”

A knot forms in my throat and cuts off my air. I gulp, though it remains there.

“He was the only thing I had left after our parents died from the Catriona plague”

“Um… So tell me…” Jaskier speaks up again. “Did he look like you?”

“How so…?”

“Beautiful green eyes, stunning smile, silky long black hair?”

I smile in spite of myself, truly grateful for both his compliment and efforts to lift my spirits. He has no reason to be doing this, to go out of his way to cheer me up. Neither of them do, yet they are. Geralt too, on his own way, as I can feel his eyes watching me carefully. Even if he’s silent, he feels ready to reach out and catch me if I stumble. Despite the fact that neither of them are physically holding me up, I feel just as enveloped.

“He was blonder” I reply to Jaskier’s question. “But yes, green eyes as well”

“Ugh, I bet we would have been the best of friends” He says to my surprise, yet… he’s strangely accurate. They would have gotten along quite well. Even if Jaskier would inhibit him quite a bit, being too outgoing and extroverted for Kader’s introverted personality.

I grin at the thought, also imagining how mesmerized he would have been by Geralt. How he would have annoyed him even more than Jaskier. Just the thought of Kader bombarding Geralt with thousands of questions makes me chuckle.

“He would have liked you” I confirm, glancing up as I haven’t in several minutes. “Both of you”

“Hm” Geralt only hums, though dedicating me the smallest of smiles.

When I peer up at Jaskier, a bigger grin is plastered on his lips. He has a dreamy expression, perhaps picturing how Kader was. The sight warms my heart. For the very first time in days, I feel hopeful. Truly hopeful. After all, it’s always darker before the dawn.

Tag list: @x-joie-x​ / @x-jodi-x​ / @dancingwith-thesunflowers​ / @golden-guide​ / @alwayshave-faith​ / @this-is-whump-dammit​ / @legallyblindgamer727​ / @lilyevans1​ / @kingniazx​ / @molethemollie // Let me know if you want to be added to the tag list to be notified when I post next chapter!!

[natsunoomoi]

More SVSSS stuff because I just watched ep 5. I’m not in a position at the moment to pay for the VIP pass and plus it’s like one show that I’d be paying for, so eh. I think I can wait.

The highlight for me is definitely always just looking at Shen Qingqiu’s face. I really like how he looks. Like when they show grown Luo Binghe he looks nice too, but it’s not that often. When Liu Qingge comes out of the cave I’ll probably enjoy the eye candy for every episode thereafter. I’m not normally really like this, so I think the aesthetics of this show just touch on something very comfortable deep in the recesses of my memory of some kung fu movie I watched with my Dad as a young child that imprinted on me so I have a very specific weakness for men with that kind of a look.

I also have a very specific weakness for villain characters that have a kind of redemption or a complicated past with some inklings of maybe they could be redeemed even if overall they were kind of a dick for at least a portion of their lives. This is my Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho weakness that almost universally applies to almost all my interests in life. I think the idea that Shen Jiu set his owner’s house on fire and killed them all except for his friend relates rather strongly to that because that is the thing that Hiei ulitimately decided not to do, but was the thing the Koorime in Hyouka no Kuni feared. Except Shen Jiu acted on it.

But like Shen Jiu supposedly could have been saved if the original’s author was a better writer and wasn’t writing a bullshit stallion novel. Like the fact that he saved Haitang is a compelling example of how his heart wasn’t completely cold. Of course she was his fiancee and people kind of are iffy about if they really were, but like they probably were between each other. Even if he was a slave, she lived in his house and she was his friend and they talk to each other. Naturally if you get along with each other really well, maybe as kids you just say, “When I grow up, I want to marry you.” Then because they’re friends and they like each other, they agree and they plan it that way. Just between them. Nothing to do with her family or the reality of the situation. Just two cute kids making a promise innocently. But like with that backdrop, it’s kind of understandable that he would save her from his slaughter and the fire that he set to destroy her family house. The interesting thing is that he never once in his entire time living there or even in the aftermath tried to tell her what her family was really like and what they did to him. He left her to hate him for what he did and assume that her family was innocent and the attack was unprovoked. He didn’t do anything to destroy her image of her loved ones.

It’s really sad how strong his mistrust for other men is, but that’s trauma too. We’re not really given specifics of how exactly he lived as a slave. We know that he was the 9th one bought, but he likely slept in close quarters with other slaves because it’s not like a noble family would give a whole lot to their slaves and amenities were probably sparse. For very different reasons, the disciple quarters even on Qing Jing Peak are probably similar. Sparse to focus on training and cultivation and close because of the number of disciples and just the overall situation. Even if the quarters had relatively more space than his slave quarters, that does sound too similar for it to be a huge trauma trigger for him on top of being surrounded by mostly other males. Self-isolation as a result of the trauma and hyper focusing on just his cultivation as a means to survive and get by day by day and create the foundation for his entire identity and basically it’s definitely the set up for disaster and all of Shen Jiu’s problems socially that lead him to being the main villain for the original story. It’s very sad. If only Yue Qingyuan tried to actually talk with him more instead of apologizing. I know he probably figured ultimately his excuse doesn’t matter, and it doesn’t, but Shen Jiu really needed help and to feel like his whole world wasn’t cold. Just knowing that he was in his friend’s thoughts and he tried to come back maybe could have eased his suffering even a little and start to build up a new level of trust again for him in particular but even for men in general. It’s sad as well that no mentors in his time there as a disciple ever like kind of noticed and tried to like just talk to him. I know he keeps his cards close and probably didn’t show outwardly he was struggling, but like how come no one asked how come he was spending so much time at the Warm Red Pavilion with women? That’s strange right? No one was concerned? I mean, like even if ultimately you say, it’s up to you if you want to keep going and that’s your business, still maybe ask and be like, “Hey, so I notice you’re not sleeping along with the other disciples and spend every night with the ladies over there? Uh, what’s up?” I think like for his teachers that might have been an important thing they should have done, but no one did? That seems like a big plothole to me that he was allowed to just continue like that with no one asking even once or showing concern that the top disciple of Qing Jing Peak was not socializing with the other disciples or sleeping in the same quarters as them. I’m surprised even not one of the ladies in the Pavilion even asked why he was there every night. I mean, I’m sure they wouldn’t want to shoo a way a client, but like no one asked even like one time? I understand from the meta point of view that plothole is probably there on purpose to show how the original’s author was a dumpster fire to create a horrible world of super toxic masculinity as an ouroboros eating itself, but jfc I really feel bad for Shen Jiu that he was made to feel such suffering as a result of absolutely shit writing just to make him an enemy for Demon Binghe.

Oh and he just had a shit first cultivation master too. What the hell with the horrible luck. This poor kid is just trying to survive and he just gets a raw deal.

But I suppose that’s also like a masterful backstory on MXTX’s part to make us root for Shen Yuan’s rewrite and create a happy life for “Qingqiu” that he wasn’t able to make himself. He did it initially for his own self-interest, but the Qingqiu everyone knows in the end is much more well-adjusted. I’m still sad though that it feels like that means original Shen Jiu still left that world with Shen Yuan replacing him only knowing sadness.

So then I was poking around the tags on here and saw someone had a theory that original Shen Jiu got punted from his timeline and turning into Shen Yuan who knows the whole story and then dies and gets put into his old body. I actually buy this, but my version of the timeline is different. Like I was thinking Shen Jiu-Qingqiu died as a human stick under all the torture and everything and then became reborn as Shen Yuan reading through his whole life and mistakes through a horribly written story and then dying via food poisoning and brought into his own old life with a chance to redeem himself. I really like this idea except that Shen Jiu seems really, really straight and Shen Yuan may be a bit more fluid.

But all this to say, that I have an itch in a confluence of all of my weaknesses to want to really comfort Shen Jiu. ;o; There’s a small part of me that while enjoying Shen Yuan’s rewrites, also really wished Shen Jiu could have been happier so he didn’t turn into such a dick because literally no one else around him seemed to do anything except let him fuck himself over including the people who supposedly cared about him. So very sad. T_T

And then maybe this should be in a different post that’s a different topic. I kind of touched on a bit how the image of the situation probably doesn’t look great, but it looks like some people are like bashing on the Bingqiu ship? It’s the canon ship for one, so just stop there.

But if you really want to go into it, as another person pointed out, the actual teacher-student relationship was between original Qingqiu and Binghe. We’re reading a different situation because it’s Shen Yuan who was a Binghe fanboy who has the relationship with Binghe. The imaging isn’t great because he’s in and controlling Qingqiu’s body, and the rest of the characters in the world don’t know this, but the meta reading of this is that it’s okay because it’s a different person actually. In world, the other characters do probably find it a little odd and the issue with Qingge in the succubus cave as I mentioned before, he’s probably panicking when the succubus mentions that Qingqiiu’s love interest is a junior because he can only think of himself as that role and didn’t think to include a disciple into that description. It doesn’t seem like it’s completely unheard of or taboo though because there seems to be some implications that maybe Shen Jiu originally had some kind of designs on Ning Yingying because he’s also a bit jealous of Binghe for getting her attention too? A large part of his jealousy comes from his insecurity with his cultivation and other people having more advantage or potential to surpass him despite his hard work, because again trauma and hyper focusing on building his entire identity around one thing and no one helping him, but like also seems in this world there’s some leeway between teacher-student relations turning into something else. This is not really a normal kind of situation where they go into a modern school or anything. A lot of the disciples were probably at one point also juniors to their master before they graduated to become a lord, and when they grow enough to end their disciple term and can become more independent cultivators they’re not really obligated to stick by such a standard because they’re adults. Like maybe they hang around the sect still and work as like someone they happen to send out on demon slaying missions if they choose to stay instead of going off somewhere and it functions a bit more like an army in that regard where they’re not really learning anything new or getting any new instruction, but they’re still kind of a disciple. It’s not a perfect 1:1 relation to teacher-student relationships because of the structure of cultivation sects. It’s not great in the army to have a relationship with your CO either, but the point in the story when their relationship develops is more like that. But like Mingfan probably eventually would go back to his family and just live out a noble life because he is a noble, so it’s not like all the disciples would stay and perpetually be students forever. There’s some very important distinctions at play here in the story that the people who object to this aren’t understanding. 

Like this isn’t like an actual school like in Harry Potter or something where the kids all go off to Hogwarts and there are actual students and teachers and every Peak is like a Hogwarts House. They’re learning and the peak lord gives them some level of instruction, but there’s also a great deal of independent study because cultivation is very personal and bound by natural talent and how much you put into it. The fact that everyone has their own manual should tell you a lot about the structure and how it’s okay for Qingqiu to leave for 3 years to go meditate in a cave. The masters in these situations are more like more well studied seniors who just have more experience and have been appointed to help you get unstuck or something because they have more experience to troubleshoot. There’s some authority carried with that as well, but it’s a very different experience from like a boarding school, so such a relationship is not entirely taboo. It’s not perfect because if you’re still trying to play the old roles at the same as your new role as a partnership that can get kind of weird, but it can work out if there’s communication involved as with generally all things.

So yeah, Bingqiu is actually okay, and rather than harping on something that’s not an issue, I think the more interesting discussion is how obligated a person is to be faithful to a different person’s life if they end up in their body. Like for body swap movies where the change is temporary they’re always like “Hey, don’t f up my life!” But like this is a permanent change where Shen Yuan was inserted into Qingqiu’s life after he was already established. What is the philosophical theory to how much he should keep up Qingqiu’s responsibilities and how much freedom should he exert for his own desires? That’s the real question. I think the balance he struck became ultimately more happy for everyone in the sect, so eh.

I realize a lot of this is not related to the episode, but the episode is just a continuation of the sparring match and nothing much else to say about it. The most interesting thing is getting to see a flashback of the original Qingqiu and getting a better idea of who he was like instead of the Shen Yuan version we know.

[caswellsbeck]

“I just don’t want you getting hurt”

Tyrus Oneshot

He hadn’t really throughly thought through his plan. He didn’t know what kind of state Tj was in, if he could walk back to his house in one piece.

What he did know was he was finally going to see what a high school party was like.

Or

Tj & Cyrus’s first I love you’s

————

It’s not that Cyrus didn’t want to learn what it was like to go to a high school party. He had seen it plenty of times on television. The music, the dancing, teens drunkingly making out in any corner they could. He was always curious of the reality of it all.

And for one split second, he considered caving into Tj’s offer and going with him to their first high school party.

He wishes it would be Andi’s party’s in middle school, him and his friends dancing, smiling in the moment, forgetting their problems for one night and coming together to get lost in the music.

But the reality was, while Cyrus knew the beauty of a party, he also knew the side effects of a high school one.

Alcohol.

He wouldn’t admit it, especially to Tj, but the thought of drinking, people being drunk, it terrified him.

Not the cheery, good times, just two drinks kind of occasion, that seemed just fine to him.

But the drink a whole bottle of vodka, getting into fights, puking on the bathroom tiles the next day situation did not seem appealing to him.

Nor did he want Tj in that situation.

And that’s why they were fighting, that’s why Cyrus was standing with his hands crossed, trying to look as intimidating as he could to convince Tj to stay in with him that Friday night.

But Tj was set on this party.

“Come on it will be fun, I promise”

“You can’t keep promises like that when you’re drunk, Tj.”

“I promise you we don’t have to drink, let’s just have fun, Cyrus” He said, slightly mocking him by using his name in the same manner Cyrus had used his own right before.

This back and fourth banter had been occurring for a few minutes, and neither of them were set on changing their opinion anytime soon.

“What if you get hurt, what if someone peer pressures you to drink and you end up fighting someone. What if someone else fights you? What if the cops show up and we get arrested and you can never play basketba-“

“You’re rambling, underdog.”

Cyrus softly took Tj’s hand, in an effort to persuade his boyfriend into agreeing with him, but also for comfort.

“I just don’t want you getting hurt.”

“And I won’t, which is why-“

“We will be staying in and watching ocean documentaries all night, my place?” Cyrus smiled, assuming his planned work and Tj finally listened to his cries.

“I was gonna say we should go get ready cause the party starts in an hour.” Tj said, feeling defeated.

“Why Tj, why do you want to go so bad? So you can get drunk and not remember anything? What’s so cool about that” Cyrus’s mood started to shift, yet he was nervous to show Tj any emotion that wasn’t love, affection, and support.

They couldn’t have their first big fight, Cyrus thought to himself, not over something this minuscule.

“Because it’s the party to kick off the basketball season, my first season as the only freshman on varsity” Tj stated, putting emphasis on the word ‘only’

“And what, you need to do this to fit in? Tj you already have proved your spot on the team, everyone knows how amazing you are” He slightly smiled, and if he wasn’t so angry at Tj his smile would be much wider.

“They don’t accept me cause I’m younger, I just want to fit in- god cyrus why is this so hard for you to understand” Tj didn’t mean to sound aggressive. He hated when he grew mad at Cyrus, he hated the thought of the ‘old Tj’ coming back, even for a slight second. And when he heard his voice, the way he spoke to Cyrus in that moment, he became scared of himself.

“Why don’t you just listen to me Tj, do you even know who’s house your going to, who’s gonna be there, what’s gonna be there, are parents going to be home? These are upperclassmen? We haven’t even been to a freshman part-“

“And here we go again.” Tj let out a sigh, half admiration for how cute Cyrus was when he babbled on, half anger for him not understanding his side of things.

“You’re starting to sound like my mom,” Tj quickly said, lightly laughing, before Cyrus could start talking again.

“I’m just trying to protect you!” He exclaimed, his voice filled with more anger and force than he possibly wanted.

But Tj didn’t know that. He took it as anger and force, and used it right back, while slowly taking his hand away from Cyrus’s grip.

“Well don’t. I don’t need your protection.” He said, his voice colder than he wanted it to be.

But Cyrus didn’t know that.

“Then go to the party then Tj, just don’t call when it doesn’t end up going your way” Cyrus said, walking away. He walked as fast as he could, trying to get out of the park as quickly as he could to prevent any chance of him running into Tj’s arms and immediately apologizing.

He could hear Tj yelling his name, begging for them to make amends, but he ignored every last one, even if deep down, he didn’t want to.

He was mad, really mad. But he still cared about Tj more than he has ever cared about anything. And that’s what scared him the most. Not their first big fight, not that Tj might possibly never talk to him again. No, it was the fact that he possibly might of hurt Tj, or worse, that Tj might get hurt that night, that’s what left a few tears trickling down his eyes.

———

11:50 p.m.

Cyrus had been checking his phone, non stop, feeling as addicted to it as Amber was.

He tried to get his mind off Tj, putting on the Tv, trying to read a book, even a documentary about Dinosaurs.

However, none of those remedies helped his pain.

All he could think about was what he said to Tj, and what Tj could possibly be doing at that moment.

‘Showering’ he thought to himself, maybe taking a shower would cure the turmoil in his thoughts, at least make his inner voice less loud in the moment.

But as he reached to check his phone one last time, he got a call from Amber.

This can’t be good.

Reluctantly, he picked it up, scared for the news that might be on the over side of the phone.

“I’m closing at the Spoon tonight and I won’t get out of work for another hour but Tj just called and I need you to pick him up from a party” Amber spoke so quickly she dared to breathe in between her words. Cyrus had never heard someone talk so fast, so worried.

“I don’t know if Tj would want that, we-“

“Had a fight, I know, but Cyrus my little brother is puking in some random kids bathroom, please do me this one favor, baby taters on me tomorrow?”

Puking. Tj. Party.

All his fears quickly became a reality. It hit him like a truck, he quickly stood up with determination to find his boyfriend and take care of him. He was furious, his whole body filled with rage, sadness. But he wasn’t going to let his emotions stop him from going to Tj and giving him all the comfort he needed.

“What if he doesn’t-“

“Cyrus. My brothers a dumbass, I think we all can agree on that. But if there’s one thing that kid knows, It’s that he cares about you. And he needs you right now, so for me, please.”

Amber continued to convince him, but Cyrus didn’t need persuasion this time.

“Send me the address, I’m there.”

And with a quick text from Amber, Cyrus began his walk to take his boyfriend home.

——-

He hadn’t really throughly thought through his plan. He didn’t know what kind of state Tj was in, if he could walk back to his house in one piece.

What he did know was he was finally going to see what a high school party was like.

He could hear the music coming out of the house he stood in front of, shocked it hadn’t been shut down.

He was so nervous to walk in, intimidated by what may lay behind those doors, but he was suddenly there, standing in the party.

And it was not like he would imagine.

Sure, there was dancing, music, teens making out in every corner. But it wasn’t as romanticized as the films he had previously watched. There were teens talking, slurring their words, people who would clearly would be puking soon laying on the couch, laughing hysterically. But there was dancing, lots of sloppy, drunk dancing. And Cyrus admired that, how free they seemed.

But his thoughts quickly turned back to more important matters, where this bathroom was.

He was lucky everyone was drunk enough, preoccupied enough to not notice a random stranger walk in the front door. He tested his luck with that one, and didn’t dare test it again to ask someone where this bathroom was. So he searched, up and down, when he finally found his boyfriend, sitting on the floor of the bathroom, his head resting on his hands as he sat, using the toilet as a pillow.

“Hey, don’t get mad, I’m just here to see if you’re okay and bring you home” Cyrus said softly, not wanting to scare the blonde boy.

“You came! Amber told me you were on your way, I thought she was lying.” he said, before admiringly exclaiming “you’re really pretty.”

“Of course I came. But no time for compliments, time to get you home.” The anger he had for Tj increases as he saw the state he was in. He looked so pale, so sweaty, so weak. It was a side of him Cyrus never saw.

Cyrus was just relieved to see no sign of a black eye.

“I’m sorry” Tj apologized, as Cyrus helped him stand up for the first time in an hour. He felt dizziness and nausea through his whole body. He fell back down to the ground, and went right back into his previous position

“No standing up right now.” Tj crossed his arms, looking like a toddler who didn’t get their way.

“I’m sorry” those words left Tj’s mouth for a second time, another time where Cyrus refused to respond.

He didn’t know how to answer.

And when he didn’t answer, Tj repeated the words “I’m sorry” over. And over. And over.

Cyrus finally caved in.

“It’s okay, we can talk in the morning”

“I wanna talk now!” Tj insisted, as Cyrus noticed the spot of vomit covering the floor. He grimaced at the sight, but knew he had to stay strong. For Tj.

“Thelonious Jagger-“

“You don’t dare use my full name!” Cyrus laughed at how shocked he was when he used his full name, for the first time since he had told it to him.

If Tj could break a promise, he could, just this once, too.

“Thelonious. This is what I didn’t want, I didn’t want you getting drunk and puking all over a strangers bathroom! Why would you do this Tj, you know better. At least I thought you did.” Cyrus stopped his voice from getting loud and angry this time. It was silent as Cyrus reluctantly cleaned it up. ‘Only for Tj’ he thought to himself.

“I promise” he said, a wave of nausea hitting him before he could continue his next words. When he got control of himself again, he began to speak, as Cyrus stayed silent until he knew Tj was done speaking. “I promise I wasn’t going to drink at first. But then we fought and I just wanted to forget all about it. The thought of us fighting, worse- of us breaking up, I couldn’t handle it. All I could see was your cute, cute face in my mind” Cyrus could feel the emotions in Tj’s slurred words, and he couldn’t say he didn’t enjoy drunk Tj’s words about him. Even if they had been dating for months, Cyrus got butterflies everytime the other boy complimented him.

“You did this because of m-“

“ I’m not finished!” Tj would be yelling if he had it in him to. “I’m sorry Cy, I know how much you didn’t want this. I did it to forget what happened. I know me, big scary basketball guy, scared to feel actual emotions, shocking!” Tj’s little laughs, his intoxicating behavior. It was too cute for Cyrus to not admire.

“It’s okay Tj. I’m sorry I made you so upset you thought you had pull something as stupid and idiotic as this. But that doesn’t mean drinking so much you puke your brains out! I trusted you.”

“You don’t trust me anymore?” He looked up at Cyrus with the cutest puppy dog eyes, so cute that the anger inside Cyrus started to go away.

“After this? Not really” he shrugged, trying so hard not to argue with Tj.

“So you’re breaking up with me?”

“No, of course not” Tj was currently playing with Cyrus’s hair as he sat next to him on the disgusting floor. Tj definitely owed him a lifetime supply of cuddles. And Amber owed him a life time supply of baby taters.

“But you can’t do this, you can’t drink this much. You could’ve gotten more hurt, I don’t know what I’d do if you got hurt.” Cyrus had to contain his emotions, as he felt himself on the verge of tears. “I forgive you Tj, I won’t forget this, but I will forgive you. Now come on let’s get you home”

Cyrus helped the taller boy up with every inch of strength he had in his body. They began to walk home, as Tj stumbled, swinging Cyrus’s hand that he held up and down dramatically and badly singing lyrics to random 80’s songs.

They finally arrived at Tj’s house, and luckily his parents were not home from their date night yet, or else Tj would of had two other people to worry about being mad at him.

Cyrus picked out pajamas for Tj to wear, shamelessly the ones he thought looked cutest on the boy, and prepared to say goodbye. As Tj began to fall asleep, Cyrus kissed his forehead, and began to walk away, being stopped as he heard three very unfamiliar words from his boyfriend’s mouth

“I love you, Underdog.”

Those words.

Those words hurt.

All the emotions of the day hit Cyrus at once, like a rollercoaster at full force.

They had never said those words before.

“I love you too, but you’re drunk, if you remember, tell me in the morning.”

———

And at 10:36 the next morning, Cyrus got a text from a, extremely hungover, Tj, saying

“I love you, Underdog, thank you for last night. Sorry I was such a mess.”

and Cyrus spent the whole morning with the boy he loved, googling random hangover cures and eating baby taters Amber had brought to him, as promised.

[rosethornewrites]

Fic: leaves eddied over the earth’s scars (fixed)

Relationships: Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Jiāng Yànlí & Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn

Characters: Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī, Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Jiāng Chéng | Jiāng Wǎnyín

Additional Tags: Angst, Grief/Mourning, Trauma, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Regret, Implied/Referenced Character Death

Summary: Lan WangJi wakes to find Wei WuXian quietly grieving his shijie.

Notes: Spectre was supposed to be a one-shot, but guess not. The title is a line from the poem “Try to Praise the Mutilated World,” which is also the series title. Also, I dumbly initially set this in the fall, but Jiang YanLi's birthday is supposedly May 2. So I fixed it and added the symbolism of the magnolia blossom. For those who don't know, in China magnolia blossoms tend to symbolize womanly beauty and gentleness, which suits YanLi. This is the corrected version.

AO3 link

Spectre

---------

Lan WangJi wakes without knowing what has disrupted his sleep. The jingshi is silent, and Wei Ying’s side of the bed is empty and unrumpled. But he has grown used to Wei Ying’s late nights; that alone would not disturb his sleep.

The silver light of a barely-waning moon spills into their home, the door slid open and letting the soft, chill breeze of late April pour in. When Lan WangJi sits up, he can barely see the shadow of Wei Ying’s figure on the porch.

A sense of unease prickles at his skin as moments tick by and there is no movement, and finally Lan WangJi stands, drawing on his outer robe and bringing Wei Ying’s with, padding barefoot to the door.

Wei Ying is curled in on himself, seated at the edge of the porch with his forehead on one knee. In his lap is a rabbit that has of late taken a liking to him, a gentle white doe dappled in brown spots so light they were almost pink. Fallen white petals from the nearby magnolia tree surround him, a few adorning his robes.

The scene would be lovely to behold if not for tears that glimmer on Wei Ying’s face in the moonlight.

Lan WangJi moves to him immediately, stepping over what appears to be an unopened jar of Emperor’s Smile. He drapes the outer robes around his shoulders, then sits behind him and gathers him close, resting his chin on Wei Ying’s shoulder. There is a tension in him, as though he is so taut he might snap.

“Wei Ying, I’m here.”

“Lan Zhan,” he murmurs, shivering as he leans into his embrace. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

Lan WangJi wishes he had, wonders if there are other nights that find Wei Ying crying alone. Or, perhaps worse, drinking himself numb. Even if tonight has been the first time, the placement of the moon suggests it is after midnight; he has potentially been out here for hours alone, in quiet pain.

“Tell me?”

He makes it a request, not a demand, something Wei Ying is free to deny if he wishes. Over a minute ticks by in silence, so long he thinks perhaps all he can do was hold him in the moonlight.

But then Wei Ying lets out a long sigh.

“Next week would have been shijie’s birthday.”

Though it’s barely a whisper, Lan WangJi can only describe his tone as lost. He understands; for Wei Ying, it will be the first birthday since her passing.

After Wei Ying’s death every anniversary had felt like a fresh lash against his soul—their meeting, the cold spring cave, the battle against the XuanWu of Slaughter… all through the day he’d plummeted to his death. The first year had been the worst.

Lan WangJi wonders how many anniversaries he has quietly grieved alone like this, hiding his pain. He had faced his grief alone, refusing to impose upon his brother, but he doesn’t want Wei Ying to face this alone.

“Tell me about her?”

He keeps it as a request, willing to simply sit here and hold him if that is what Wei Ying needs.

“Ah, you met her, Lan Zhan.”

Something in the way he says it is hesitant, though, and so Lan WangJi responds gently.

“I do not know her as Wei Ying does.”

He purposefully keeps the phrase in the present tense, for Jiang YanLi lives on in the memories of her brothers. He knows Wei Ying has noticed when his breath hitches and he shifts to the side in Lan WangJi’s arms to lean his head against his chest, gently repositioning the rabbit as he does.

Comparing Wei Ying’s speech to a burst dam, though a common metaphor, is inaccurate; rather, words come slowly, sometimes haltingly.

Lan WangJi learns of Jiang YanLi’s dedication to keeping him safe and happy, how she found him up a tree and coaxed him down and home and filled him with warm soup and love. Of her smiles at his antics, and how he sought to keep her smiling through childish behavior. Of how she tried to shield him from Madam Yu’s rages.

Far more than a sister; he is grieving the loss of a surrogate mother. He knows of Wei Ying’s childhood, of the time spent fighting dogs for food in the streets following the death of his parents before Jiang FengMian had finally found him. Lan WangJi is reminded of his own inconsolable grief at his mother’s death. The similarities are incomplete, but pain is not meant to be compared—only acknowledged and eased.

If only he knew how.

Between the lines he hears another fear: that without  Jiang YanLi the rift between Wei Ying and Jiang WanYin will never mend, that she was what brought them together, that without her any reconciliation is impossible.

Tears have seeped through the layers he is wearing by the time Wei Ying falls quiet, his breath still hitching irregularly.

“It was my fault she was there. If I hadn’t stopped at Koi Tower…”

Lan WangJi knows how these regrets work, having questioned his own actions for years, critiquing everything he could have done differently that might have saved him. After learning from Wen QiongLin of Wei Ying’s secret, the loss of his golden core, he knows just how many mistakes he made.

“She would have sought you regardless,” he says, and knows it to be true. Just as he had come, Jiang YanLi would have out of love.

A tremor runs through Wei Ying, and Lan WangJi brings one hand up to thread through his hair in a comforting motion.

“She wished to protect you.” And she did goes unsaid.

“She shouldn’t have,” is so soft he barely hears it, and he can’t stop himself from clutching Wei Ying tighter against him. The rabbit kicked at them, squirming out from between them to settle on the porch beside them; Lan WangJi barely registers it.

“She sacrificed herself and I just—“

“Wei Ying.” He can’t bear for him to complete that thought. “That was not you. The Book of Turmoil…”

The sob that rips itself from Wei Ying seems to echo in the still air.

“How can you be so sure?”

There is an air of desperation to his voice, and it pains Lan WangJi that Wei Ying has been so wronged, lost so much, been led to doubt even himself.

“Su MinShan played at Nightless City, just as he did at Qiongpi Path.”

A tremor passes through Wei Ying at the mention of that place.

“His target was me,” Lan WangJi whispers. “Your death was his weapon.”

The events at Guanyin Temple had left him with little doubt: Su MinShan had killed Jiang YanLi to break Wei Ying, to leave him susceptible to the music, knowing he would be too strong to succumb without excessive measures. Just as the other cultivators had given into their worst inclinations, their amplified lust for power leading them to fight each other over the remains of the Stygian Tiger Seal, Wei Ying had succumbed to self-loathing so deep it had led him to...

He can’t finish that thought, panic and grief threatening despite the warmth of Wei Ying in his arms.

Lan WangJi suspects Jiang WanYin had been similarly affected, that perhaps some of the rage that the man still holds onto was truly anger at his own actions.

Or perhaps he just hopes this is the case for Wei Ying’s sake.

“That was not you,” he says again.

Wei Ying’s fingers trace one of the discipline scars that peeks above his night robes, as though he recognizes it as a physical symbol of their trauma. Lan WangJi resists the temptation to trace the almost invisible scar at Wei Ying’s throat, trying not to remember his attempt to convince him his life was not worth sealing his spiritual energy. Even so, he can’t quite contain a shudder at the phantom memory.

“Lan Zhan…” His breath is hot against his collarbone. “Does it ever end, Lan Zhan?”

He knows he is speaking of grief, of trauma and regret and guilt. It had for him, but only because Wei Ying had returned, the notes of their song played by a masked man on a mountain thirteen years into his grief bringing tears to his eyes and hope to his soul.

“I did not wish it to,” Lan WangJi admits.

Letting go of it would have felt like letting go of him, and that he couldn’t bear.

Fingers come to rest on his cheek, wiping at moisture he didn’t realize was there.

“Oh, Lan Zhan.”

Wei Ying’s voice is grieved, but the apology is implied rather than spoken. They had promised, after all.

“Together,” Lan WangJi tells him. “We can try together.”

“Together,” Wei Ying echoes, but adds nothing more.

Lan WangJi is not good with words; this conversation has required more of them than he can usually manage. But he knows Wei Ying still needs them, needs reassurance, from the way he is pressed close, pliable, drooping against him, the tension eased somewhat but still present under the surface. It would be easy to let action take over and distract, but that will not heal.

“How do you wish to celebrate Jiang YanLi’s birth?” he finally manages, uncertain of what else to say; he only hopes these words will help, not harm.

Nearly a minute passes in silence, and he wonders if he failed, but then Wei Ying speaks so softly he almost doesn’t understand the words, as though he is speaking to himself.

“I wouldn’t be welcome.”

Lan WangJi has to quash old anger before he can reply.

“I will write to Jiang WanYin. We will go to Yunmeng, if that is your wish.”

Welcome or not, there will be words if Wei Ying is denied, he decides. Perhaps sixteen years’ worth.

Wei Ying doesn’t reply, doesn’t say no, only trembles in his arms, and though he knows it is not, Lan WangJi decides to interpret it as cold, lifts him to his feet and wraps the robe more snugly around him.

He stoops to pick up the rabbit, leaving the untouched jar of Emperor’s Smile to put away in the morning. Wei Ying’s eyes are red-rimmed, his face pale in the moonlight, as pale as he had been at Nightless City. He looks delicate, like he might break. Again.

He looks exhausted.

Lan WangJi hands him the rabbit, then scoops him into his arms, meeting no resistance as he brings him into the jingshi, tucks him into bed, pulling away only to place the rabbit in a small hutch near the bed usually reserved for ill or injured ones.

He isn’t certain whether either of them will truly sleep tonight, but he gathers Wei Ying to him, runs a hand soothingly against his back until his breathing is calm and regular anyway. Even if he isn’t asleep, he is at least no longer so tense it feels he could shatter.

Tomorrow he will make arrangements for Uncle to take over his duties during his absence, will write the letter to Jiang WanYin and send it, will visit XiChen in his seclusion so he won’t worry at his absence and to explain his intentions in Yunmeng, will begin preparations for the journey.

Most important, he will watch Wei Ying, give him what he needs so they can face their pain together.

[tiny-maus-boots]

Wild West AU pt 16

A/N: Always a huge huge huge thank you to @chloes-yellow-cup for beta’ing and doing the thing with ao3 because I am intentionally incapable of doing it myself. 

also a thank you to @antiquesoul83 and @eleanors-rigby for letting me ramble and all the others that have left comments, kudos, likes, and messages. y’all are so kind. 

A/N 2: i guess i’m not as close to finished as i thought? i swear i thought this would be over chapters ago. 

Stacie 

“I know, I know darlin’. Just a little bit further….” Stacie lifted Aubrey as carefully as she could, her heart stopping in her chest every time a pained whimper slipped from the blonde’s lips. Beca and Chloe jumped down from their wagons and moved to help her lower Aubrey off the cart but Stacie held her closer unwilling to let anyone else put their hands on her girl. It was silly, she knew that, Beca and Chloe cared deeply about Aubrey, and she knew they would be as careful as she. But she couldn’t. Not just yet.

Beca gave a slight nod, immediately understanding Stacie’s need to keep Aubrey to herself. “I know Stace…but we ain’t got much time to waste. Let us help you. Please.”

She hesitated a second longer but Aubrey gave a soft whine and Stacie caved, nodding her agreement. Beca and Chloe eased Aubrey out of her arms and out of the wagon while she scrambled down quickly. Stacie immediately reached out for the blonde as soon as she was on the ground and Chloe settled Aubrey into her arms. The front door of the large house they were moving toward swung open and a man stepped out onto the wide porch to watch them.

“This doesn’t look good.” John shook his head and yelled over his shoulder to the interior of the house. “Ma, time to bid our visitors goodnight, Stacie’s come home with some friends.”

Gail poked her head out and surveyed the group as they all climbed down from the various wagons. She eyed them all with a slight frown then gestured to The Sisters. “You two will sour a man’s appetite in those getups. G’wan. Take those horses to the barn and stash those wagons.” When she was sure they were far enough out of sight she turned back toward Stacie and gave a soft snort. “Of course it would be you. Let’s get her inside.”

It wasn’t the warmest greeting but Stacie was beyond grateful that they were welcome at all. She kept her focus on Aubrey’s drawn face as she carried her, careful not to jostle too much. Each step up to the porch made her mate’s face twist as she fought the urge to groan out her discomfort. It made the tears fall from Stacie’s eyes faster, blurring her vision enough to almost make her miss the last step. Once she was through the door she stopped, suddenly unsure of where she should go.

There had been a time when she lived there at the house and her steps would have carried her to her old room upstairs at the end of the hall. But that was a lifetime ago. A lifetime before Aubrey. Stacie raised her head slowly and finally met the older woman’s gaze. “I dunno what to do here Ma…” It was more that she didn’t know what she would do if she ever lost Aubrey rather than she didn’t know where to go. But Gail took pity on her, gaze softening a fraction for half a second.

“Best take her into my boudoir.”

Stacie gave a nod and walked as quickly and carefully as she could to Gail’s room. Chloe yanked the heavy spread off the bed and Stacie gently laid Aubrey in it. The second that Aubrey’s warm weight wasn’t in her arms she sagged to her knees, kneeling by the bed with the blonde’s hand clutched in her own. “Please don’t die on me, darlin’. I still need you.”

Aubrey’s lips twitched and her hand gripped Stacie’s far too weakly. Beca rested a comforting, warm hand on her shoulder and it was all just too much. Stacie felt herself breaking down and knew it was something they could ill afford right then. Gail nudged her out of the way and inspected the injuries with a critical eye. “Stitch work looks good. She’s lost a lot of blood though. Pa, ring the bell and clear the house. I have a feeling we might need to hunker down.”

“Yeap, I figured. This is not a good way to do business Ma.”

John gave a quick shake of his head but stepped briskly from the room. The sound of the chow bell caused a flurry of movement above their heads and Stacie caught Beca looking up at the ceiling wonderingly. “Just spit it out already Bec.”

Beca dropped her gaze quickly blushed. “You lived here.” It wasn’t a question because she already knew the answer. They all did. Stacie gave a curt nod and kept her eyes on Aubrey’s face willing her to sit up and be well again. Heavy footsteps bounded down the stairs as several people left the bedrooms above them. She could hear the rough masculine voices grumbling out their displeasure and John making conciliatory sounds. She knew he was offering them a chance to come back the next day to finish what they’d started, it was just part of business.

Stacie bit her lip and nodded slowly. “A long time ago, yeah. Before she found me.” Stacie sniffed once and took a deep settling breath. “But you already know that.”

Beca nodded and leaned a little into Stacie’s side. “Still my favorite love story.” That did it for her, the kindness in Beca’s voice, the warmth of her words, it broke the dam she was barely holding up. Stacie couldn’t fight the crushing pressure of her pain and fear and she let out a gasping sob. Arms wound around her body and she was dimly aware that Chloe was holding her as she cried.

Gail looked at them huddled close to Aubrey, her gaze landing on each of the women crowding the room. “Alright let’s just get ourselves square here. You three give me some room, the rest of y’all can just git. Go on. Shoo. Go find a drink or a girl or a room, or all three, just get out of here.”

No one moved a muscle until Beca jerked her head at the door in a signal for them all to leave. When the door had closed behind Ace, Beca turned to Gail and pinned her with a deeply intense look. “They might be coming after us before too long, you’ll wanna clear out if they do.”

“They. Well who is it this time hm? Sheriff Cox and his posse?” Gail chuckled and only gave the barest glance at John when he slipped back into the room. “We might have some trouble coming, Pa.”

“I figured as much. Damned womenfolk always causing some kind of dustup. You especially.” He pulled a chair from the corner and settled into it with a sigh, his keen gaze holding Stacie’s. John took his time packing a pipe with tobacco and lighting it before he spoke again. “You know there were several gentleman callers that would have paid a good price to keep you on regular, maybe even marry you. All you had to do was give ‘em some babies.”

Beca gave a rumble of a growl and Chloe snapped her head up to stare at John with pointed defiance. Stacie wasn’t too bothered, that was just the way he was. Despite the type of business he and Gail ran, or maybe because of it, Pa never quite got over the idea that women were a commodity that could be traded and sold.

“Shut up John.”

Everyone turned to Aubrey who had finally opened her eyes again. She looked tired and far too pale but the heat in her gaze held the force of her personality.

“Oh you’re awake. You sure did piss off someone. Who did you steal from this time?”

Gail chose to remain silent as she set about the business of cleaning the dried blood from around Aubrey’s leg wound. She tutted softly at the damage but her hands were gentle and steady. Stacie brought her gaze back to John and shrugged. “Who says we stole anything?”

“Ha. Oh you are funny, girl. Very funny. Couldn’t lay on your back and make an honest living, you had to take up with notorious thieves. You think we didn’t hear about this one getting set to hang?” He gestured to Beca with his pipe and then pointed it at Aubrey. “And this one stole our best girl. So yes Stacie, I know you stole something from someone and they want it back bad.”

It was the first time he had ever shown real anger with her. Though in all fairness she never did manage to say goodbye when she’d run off with Aubrey. Maybe in her heart of hearts she had known that John wouldn’t take it well. Gail stopped what she was doing and gave him a tired sigh as if it was a tirade she had grown used to hearing over the years.

“I’ll tell you one time, John Smith…” Aubrey’s voice was tight and gravelly but her gaze was steady and penetrating. “I can’t steal what you never owned.”

It dropped between them all like a lead weight. John gave a mutter and she wasn’t exactly sure what he said but Gail turned quickly to him and pointed toward the door. “That’s enough now, you get out too. She’s weak not dead and I reckon still strong enough to put a bullet in your dumb ass. Now go.”

He got up and left without a backward glance but Aubrey’s eyes followed his every move until the door shut behind him. She let out a shaky breath and relaxed further in the bed. Stacie squeezed her hand and smiled at the firmer grip that Aubrey gave in return. It gave her hope that her girl would pull through. The truth was John was a little bit right though. Aubrey had stolen her. She had stolen Stacie’s heart the moment she crossed the threshold into Ma and Pa’s parlor and every day since. The memory made her breath catch and she had to look away to settle herself.

“How much trouble are ya in?”

Mercifully Beca answered with a shrug of her shoulders. “Fair amount. We’ll clear out soon as we can but we’ve got to take care of something first.”

“Hm. That something wouldn’t have something to do with settling a score would it?”

None of them said anything and Gail gave it a nod of acknowledgement before moving to clean up Aubrey’s shoulder. “You know Pa wouldn’t be this sore at you if you’d just apologize for leaving. After your father died…we were the ones what took you in. We fed you, clothed you…”

“And then there was business…right?”

Gail didn’t say anything to that for a moment. Her hand shook slightly but she gathered herself up and levelled a gaze at Stacie. “You were a grown woman Stacie. Maybe we didn’t give you good choices but you made the ones you made.” The older woman set the blood stained rag to the side and finally looked at Stacie fully. “For what it’s worth, I always thought choosing her…was your best choice ever.”

Stacie gave a nod and smiled down at Aubrey. “Yes she was.” The blonde smiled sweetly and closed her eyes with a sigh of content that was only marred by the wince of pain as she shifted her shoulder too quickly. It was a small reminder that they were running out of time and Stacie was torn between settling up with Avery and never letting Aubrey out of her sight again. Chloe reached out and put her hand over both Stacie’s and Aubrey’s joined hands.

“You don’t have to…”

“Yes she does.” Aubrey groaned as she struggled to sit up and Beca slid an arm behind her to ease her up gently. “Thank you Beca. Yes. She does. You three need to stick together now, you’re already one gun short and odds are bad already. You have to go, Stacie.”

She hated it, hated even more that Beca and Chloe didn’t try to argue against it. And hated the most that she knew deep down that Aubrey was right. “Bree…”

“I’ll be here waiting. Promise.” Aubrey had hit on her deepest fear and Stacie had to look away. She would never forgive herself if she left with Beca and Chloe and came back to Aubrey being… “Hey….I’m not going anywhere.”

It would have been easier to believe if the last time Aubrey said something similar hadn’t ended with her shot full of holes but she didn’t dare mention that now. Stacie licked her lips and nodded even though everything in her was screaming that it was wrong. “We’ll be back soon, then we’re all out of here. You hear?”

Aubrey nodded and gave Stacie another small tired smile and a nod. Chloe leaned over the bed and kissed Aubrey’s forehead. “I promise I’ll bring her back to you.” Beca gave Aubrey’s free hand a squeeze before she led Chloe out of the room to wait for Stacie outside.

Gail cleared her throat and lifted the wash basin with dirty water and slipped out of the room behind them. When it was just the two of them Stacie finally said what was plaguing her mind. “If I lose you Aubrey…I lose all the best parts of me.”

“Ain’t lost me yet.” Stacie gave a teary eyed nod but it was still too close of a call and she was worried now in a way she hadn’t ever been before. “Stace…look at me.”

The tall brunette wiped her eyes and looked at Aubrey, really looked at her. “It was too close.”

“Yes. Yes it was. And it will be closer still until you finish the job. Promise me something?”

“Anything.” There wasn’t even a hint of hesitation. For Aubrey, she’d blow up the world and never bat an eye at it.

Aubrey gave a brief nod of her head, her voice growing tight again with suppressed emotion. “Promise me you’ll kill that son of a bitch brother of mine.”

It was firm and direct and Stacie blinked once in surprise but nodded her agreement. It was the last thing she expected from Aubrey but it was a sentiment she could get behind wholeheartedly. It renewed her resolve to finish what they started and she could see that was exactly what Aubrey had intended.

“Yes ma’am I promise.”

[tserofweald]

My Dalish Warden headcanons

I journal my headcanons about my Dalish Warden Atheline Mahariel, but my hand is seriously giving out on the heavy writing. I have two other characters in development, Lethel Lavellan (she’s the first one I worked on).

This is for the sake of documenting my current development of Mahariel, and I apologize if I get any of the DA lore wrong :) They’re not really headcanons but more so going over my characterization of Mahariel.

Atheline Mahariel, Athy for short to her friends. She was 20 years old at the beginning of the Fifth Blight. She’s a warrior specializing in two-handed weapons. 

She’s stupid strong despite her short stature even for an elf. She’s very careless in battle and is the one to set off all the traps during combat. Zevran literally trains his ass off to up his lockpicking skills to disengage all traps beforehand. 

She and Zevran eventually get into a friends with benefit relationship. She had never experienced sex, and was never really interested in it until getting to know Zevran. She was pretty eager to give it a go, and really enjoyed it with him. 

Though Zevran was really on the idea of them just being friends with intimacy involved, Atheline had developed special feelings for him, though she didn’t really understand that she had those feelings at the time. She was satisfied with keeping things between them as just “friends.” 

Atheline wanted to explore her sexual experience more through sleeping with other people. Though she was definitely satisfied at the Pearl, she ended up reserving this space solely for Zevran. She didn’t understand why, but she felt some sort of a spark with Zevran but none with her other encounters (later on, she realizes it’s because she loved him). 

Though she reserves herself to engage sexually only with Zevran, she didn’t mind Zevran engaging with others than herself.

Atheline is proud of her Dalish heritage, but not in the sense Lavellan is. My Lavellan is interested in uncovering the truth of elven lore/history, whereas Atheline focuses more on her people standing up against slavery enforced by Tevinter. She takes the most pride in her people’s bravery and fortitude, fighting against forced human religion and exploit, knowing the consequences. 

Atheline was initially not a religious person. She didn’t really care to pray to the Creators, for she knew they wouldn’t be able to hear her prayers. But when Tamlen went missing and she had to enter the shem world as a Grey Warden, she prayed relentlessly to Mythal and Andruil for guidance. 

She got the same Vallaslin as Tamlen and didn’t put much thought into actually picking a god to draw strength from. No matter what god it represents, a Vallaslin is a Vallaslin, right?

The biggest value she learns from her culture is creating a close, familial connection with everyone in the clan. This is why Mahariel is so well accustomed to welcoming anyone who wanted to join her in her journey. She was able to create deep, personal bonds very quickly and easily with those around her.

Keeper Marethari also taught her clan that yes, learning more about their elven past is important, and they should continue to find supporting artifacts that’d expand their knowledge, but no knowledge is at the cost of a clansman. Safety and well being of individuals came first. Atheline really took that to heart, though she’d often forget this lesson in place for dangerous adventures.

Despite her deep love for her clan, she also craved adventures beyond the forest. She wanted to know what the world was like beyond the Dalish, beyond the elves. She’d sometimes sneak out of camp with Tamlen and Merrill to visit a nearby village. There’d be a summer festival, with food, music and dancing. She was so intrigued to see human traditions. Tamlen would tease she’s gonna become one of the “flat-ears.” They’d regularly sneak out to nearby villages every time the camp relocated, though Ashalle had caught them at some point and scolded them for it.

Mahariel never thought she’d be “adventuring” in the outside world at the cost of Tamlen’s life and feels guilty for becoming a Grey Warden. Why was she saved in place of him?

Tamlen and Mahariel were best friends since birth, and they met Merrill when they were 10 years old. While Merrill was timid and strict with herself as she was the clan’s First, Tamlen and Mahariel would try and help her relax and engage in fun stuff together. Tamlen and Atheline would invite Merrill out on hunting together, and the two hunters would compete who had the best kill. Merrill would be the mediator during these competitions. 

When entering their teen years, Merrill and Tamlen began having romantic feelings for Atheline. Merrill and Tamlen knew that they shared mutual feelings for Mahariel, and thus their relationship became strained and distant because of it.

Merrill stopped joining in on sneaking into villages with the duo, for she felt that her relationship with them were weaker than the bond between Tamlen and Atheline. She slowly continued to distance herself from the two, and eventually Atheline confronted her about it. Merrill simply says she wanted to focus more on her training as the next Keeper, and that she shouldn’t let such distractions keep her from her studies. 

“That’s bullshit, Merr. What are you doing pulling on Fenharel’s dick for? I’m sorry if I did anything to upset you, but I can’t change if you don’t tell me.” 

“It’s because I’m in love with you, you twat!” 

And there it is, Merrill blurted out the one fear she had, loving Mahariel, loving another woman. In my hc because there aren’t many Dalish people who can preserve the elven gift left by their ancestors (magic), having Merrill was a miraculous gift to the clan. And to keep the old magic alive in the clan, Merrill is expected to produce another bearer of magic. Being with another woman was not an option for Merrill. Merrill not only distanced herself because she knew how Tamlen felt and thought that she had no chance with Mahariel, but she also knew that her clan would never let her be with Mahariel. 

On Atheline’s part, I would like to think that she had feelings for Tamlen but was too late to realize it. She didn’t understand her feelings and was never really bothered to understand them, other than the fact that she cared really deeply for him, but she didn’t think it was any different from how she felt about Merrill (which is why she has a hard time understanding how she feels for Zevran). Atheline ends up rejecting Merrill’s confession, saying that she doesn’t feel the same way, but she always cares about her as a friend. This breaks Merrill’s heart and asks Mahariel if she’d instead be with Tamlen, to which Atheline doesn’t reply because she doesn’t know how to. Merrill and Atheline’s relationship become pretty strained because of it (this will be around the time Dalish origins starts).

Atheline only realizes her feelings when she sees Tamlen as a ghoul and when she was forced to kill him. 

Sadly, Tamlen and Atheline never discussed about his feelings for her. She wasn’t clueless; she knew he had something to say, but he’d just treat her the same as how he always had, and with how it ended with Merrill, she didn’t have the heart to force an answer out of Tamlen either. If he had confessed to her, she wouldn’t have known what to do. Reject him like how she rejected Merrill? Ruin the brotherhood they had together because she couldn’t sort out her feelings?

Tamlen knew how Atheline felt, which was why he decided not to speak to her about it. And they would never speak about it until he reappears into her life as a ghoul. 

“Always…loved you…”

Tamlen and Atheline wanted to go into the cave to find anything interesting to bring back to Merrill in hopes of mending their friendships, for they knew that Merrill was always delighted to discover new elven artifacts. They thought they could do the same with the mirror. 

When Atheline becomes a Grey Warden, she didn’t give up on searching for Tamlen. She made it her life mission and commitment to find him and save him. She didn’t believe Duncan and the clan when they said that Tamlen is dead. She found no body. He must be alive. And he was. 

She blames herself when Tamlen goes missing. She had let her arrogance and thirst for adventure get the better of her. The Dread Wolf had guided her this entire time. She blamed herself for Merrill’s heartbreak, for Tamlen’s unrequited feelings, and for the torture he must be going through with the taint.

Because of this, she becomes extremely protective of her party members during combat. She lets no one step into an unknown area until she examines it first. She’d take an arrow for her teammates when she can, causing her to take on the most injury out of the party. She’d tank her way through it if it meant letting her friends go unharmed.

Many of her companions thought she was arrogant and condescending because of her “I can do it myself” attitude, but when she takes that first hit for a companion, they realize it’s because she’s terrified of having any one of them injured.

It was finally during the trials to find the Urn of Sacred Ashes when Atheline finally accepts the idea of Tamlen being gone. It was when the spirit had taken the form of Tamlen and had said, “Goodbye, my friend. We will never meet again.” That she finally let herself think that it’s okay to forgive herself for this tragedy. 

But then he comes back. He comes back and she can’t save him. She regretted not telling him how she felt. She regretted letting him die without telling him how sorry she was she took too long to realize her feelings.

She does him one last favor and kills him instantly so that she may end his pain. She only feels empty. Alistair is the first to ask if she’s alright, that this was the only way and that it had been a mercy to him. She just wanted him to shut up. 

Mahariel goes into the forest by herself, with Tamlen’s body in her arms, wanting to give him a proper Dalish burial. 

Zevran followed her into the forest, and with not a single word, helps her bury Tamlen. She allowed herself to sob and cry relentlessly, and Zevran would simply wrap his arms around her.

After recovering from Tamlen’s death, she confesses to Zevran that she loves him out of the blues, completely startling Zevran and him rejecting her confession outright because an assassin cannot love. 

“And that’s fine. Just because someone loves you doesn’t mean you need to love them back. You don’t have to do anything at all, really. But I don’t want to make the same mistake I did with Tamlen. I love you, and that’s all there’s to it.”

This completely flusters Zevran and he has no idea what to do with it. He’s been growing fondly of her day after day and had become even more protective of her, but to have her tell him outright that she loves him is just….weird. Incomprehensible. 

[mademoiselleseraph]

12th Perigee's Eve with Some Minor Celebrities

A very belated secret santa gift for the @hiveswapsecretsanta2018 and @the-bisexual-dumpster about Charun, Chixie, and Cirava spending the holiday together and being best buds

~~~

Charun was running late, but when weren’t they running late? They supposed it was a small price to pay for looking nice.  They knew looking nice for them meant looking like a disaster to others but it was typical for -- what did people call them? -- oh yeah, avant garde types.  They were so avant garde. The avant-est of garde. Yeah.

They had already combed their hair (just to muss it up just right), brushed their teeth (doing what they could to dull their fangs), and washed their face (and applied some blood based paint to the sides of their mouth and one of their temples).  Next step was to say goodbye. They patted the shell of their lion-faced snail lusus, Speedy, promising to be safe. Then they went to the ventriloquist dummy they found one day and had a strange attachment to though they could not, for the life of them, remember where it came from or when they first saw it, let alone what species it was supposed to portray.  Some kind of demon thing? Maybe. They gave it a strong hug and gently placed it back down on the floor. Finally, they went to the wall.

The dummy always gave Charun what a friend of theirs would describe as “weird fucking vibes, man lmao.”  Looking at its glassy eyes and painted smile unsettled them. It gave them a jittery giddiness for pain and destruction that itched and disoriented.  There was a wall in the cave that had the opposite effect. The words scrawled all about in various shades of blood had a somber, melancholy look, but filled them with hope.  They ran a finger under the words where they seemed to start.

“Let it be known before all else,” it read, “that there is no sin in wanting to live.  Second, that to help instead of harm one’s fellow troll is nobler by far. Third, that worth and character cannot be determined by blood.”

And it went on.  Their favorite part of it was the tale of Twelfth Perigee’s eve.  This figure and his group traveled by day as often as they could, shielding themselves from the harsh sun with parasols, cloaks, and scarves.  But the Twelfth Perigee was the darkest of all perigees, and one could could walk freely without fear of burning on that one day. They celebrated the ease of their burden, baking sweet cakes for the orphans and sharing cordial among the adults.

And then they remembered the sweet cakes.  They had baked them in a fit of inspiration from the ancient scribblings to take to their friends for their Twelfth Perigee’s Eve get-together.  Oh right, they were really quite late now. They put the still warm cakes into an insulated bag, and then into another insulated bag to be sure they were kept warm, and then in a basket for that rustic charm.  They slipped on a coat, shaped to look like it had odd growths under the material and decorated with scrap metal, and headed out.

Meanwhile, Chixie was worried.  She was often worried due to various factors, mostly having to do with cameras and what they would capture and what others would do with it.  But it wasn’t entirely about that this time.

Her worrying was a major reason her friends agreed to meet at her place for Perigee’s Eve.  That way no one would catch her walking to anyone’s hive and start rumors that would convince her more powerful and more obsessive fans to take out the competition in gruesome ways.  Would that happen? No way to say for sure, but she’d rather stay on the safe side.

It must have been around the fifth time she looked out the window in the span of twenty minutes when Cirava called to her from the couch.

“Chix, I’m gonna need you to calm down,” they said.  “This isn’t the first time they’ve run late and it won’t be the last.”

“I know,” she replied in as un-snippity a manner as she could.  “but it’s been a while since you got here and you never know what kind of creeps are out there or what they’re seeing or what they’re saying.”

“Are people really watching your hive to see who comes and goes?”

“It’s not like I’m that hard to track down and it’s not exactly difficult to get into the bronze side of town.”  Her breathing quickened and her face contorted in panic as she continued: “And you know whatever they write about me, he’s gonna see it, and --”

“Chixie!”  They clamped a hand on her shoulder, trying to snap her out of it.  “This is ultimately your place so you’re gonna do what you’re gonna do.  But when you get worked up like this, you get agitated, then bitter, then hopeless, and that’s about when you tend to hit the bottle.”

Her shoulders drooped and she sank into the couch under their arm and squeezed the hand still holding her shoulder.  They were a wispy thing and by all logic their bony limbs should have hurt to be held in, but nothing could make anyone feel safer.

“I don’t mean to cross any bounds by sounding all conciliatory and shit,” they continued, “but you said you were tryna cut back, so I figured we should at least wait til Charun gets here.”

“You’re not crossing anything,” she insisted, hugging them back.  “I know you’re not meaning it like that, and I appreciate you trying to help.”

“While we’re at it maybe we could not talk about him today?  Whenever he gets brought up, you seem to feel worse, and I know I don’t have any fond memories of the guy.”

“Yeah.  I could use a break from even thinking about him.  When do you think Charun will get here?”

And just then there was a knock at the door.  Speak of the devil.

Chixie opened the door and drew Charun into a warm hug.

“I know I’m late...” they mumbled.  An unfinished thought, but soon to come again.

“Oh, we’re just happy your safe!” Chixie chirped.

“You had her worried sick, dumbass,” Cirava joked.

“...but I brought food,” they concluded, holding up the basket.  “Cakes for everyone.”

Cirava took the basket to the table and opened the insulated bags.

The lovely smell hit Chixie’s nose instantly.  “Chocolate?”

“And raspberry!” Cirava murmured, mouth already full of a bite.

“Glad you like ‘em...” Charun droned on.  “Made plenty…. Have ‘smany as you’d like….”

They tactfully did not mention the lack of cordial in respect for Chixie’s little problem, or the fact the inspiration came from a wall someone had written on in blood.

They talked fans, making sure to exclude him as promised, and the pressure of fame, and lusii of course.  They were still young after all. Eventually they stumbled on the subject of Chixie’s lovely home and decorating.

“Yeah, I normally don’t get too festive,” she admitted, “but I wanted to go all out for you two.”

“It’s….” Charun mumbled.

“Bitchin’,” Cirava stated.

“....Pretty,” Charun concluded.

She swelled with pride, took a deep breath, and let herself process that pride.  “Yeah, it’s not too shabby,” she said. “Actually, I think I did a great job!” It felt good.  It felt true.  None of that coy oh, you bullshit or false modesty.  She didn’t have to pretend around them because they knew it too.

Her hive really was decked to the nines.  Tinsel garlands, evergreen wreaths, the bones on the mantle, a roaring fire, candles, and of course the behemoth leaving with its own decorations.

“Why is that even a thing?” Cirava asked, gesturing to it.  “Like how did that start? It’s not entirely sanitary.”

“Oh, I know this one!” Chixie said.  “It’s excellent fertilizer. It used to be that you’d keep it in the hive so no one could steal it, and you’d put it on your crops through the planting season and they’d grow like crazy.  The decorations started with cloves and evergreen twigs to make it smell better.”

“And the bones…” added Charun, “...were good for crops too…. But also… after you suck the marrow out… you can string ‘em up like windchimes….  Scares off some aggressive species... if you live out in the middle of nowhere….”

“Speaking of aggressive species,” Cirava noted, setting up their husktop, “you guys wanna shout out to my fans with me?”

The others agreed and sat on either side of them as they got the microphone ready, put on their camera face, and hit record.

“Hey all you funky little weirdos.  I’m taking a break from streaming to spend the holiday with some dear friends, but I’ll be back the day after tomorrow.  Thank you so much for all the love and support, and I’ll be sure to link in the description where you can listen to some of my fresh beats til I get back.  But hey, from me and mine to you and yours--”

And then they all said, more or less in unison, “Happy Eve!” and waved at the camera. Cirava shut it off and posted the video to their chittr and other social media accounts, then put the husktop away.

And with that out of the way, and some touches of worry as to what her fans would make of it, Chixie decided it was best to break out the punch.  She made it in advance and left it to chill and had completely forgotten it. That must have been Cirava’s doing, she realized, keeping her mind on other things and away from the drink.  Though she restrained herself and made it significantly less boozy than she usually did, and apologized if that made it taste funny.

“Actually,” said Charun, “I think it’s… better.”

And she flashed a quick but genuine thank-you smile.  She never really drank it for the taste before.

And they went on like that.  Cirava and Charun passed a pipe between them, offering to Chixie.  She only took one hit, not wanting to dry out her throat. Cirava, on the other hand, blew all manner smoke rings and swished their hand in the smoke to make blurry semblances of shapes.  Charun tried to trace abstract outlines of them with their own finger. Something about it gave Chixie a cheery sense of ease that was quite rare to her. She asked Cirava if the case for their husktop was soundproof, which they confirmed, and she suggested they all put their palm husks in with it.

“So….  What was that about?” asked Charun.Chixie had the beginnings of a mischievous little smirk at the corners of her mouth and replied, “How about singing some carols?”

“Um, are you out of your gourd?” Cirava shot back.

“I already plugged the TV and anything else that might be bugged.  And besides, what’s Twelfth Perigee’s Eve without a little illegal activity?”

“We should steal…” Charun trailed off, “from highbloods!  And leave shit… on their lawnrings.”

And after some scared looks from their companions, they took it back.

“Nah…. You’re right… that’s a death sentence…. Let’s just sing some songs.”

Chixie started with the old familiar melody:

“Oh, merry moon

Lend me your tune

For on my pipes to play”

And then Charun in a surprisingly graceful baritone voice:

“And may the lonesome

Find a home

On this most holy darkest day”

And they both looked to Cirava waiting for them to join.  Eventually they caved.

“They killed him

And they cursed him

But it’s said he’ll come again”

And all of them in unison:

“So merry moon

Lend me your tune

To welcome an old friend”

And they sang songs about respite and recovery and joy to be found among friends and a fruitful new sweep with burdens lifted.  Songs that were outlawed and had to be sung in complete secrecy for fear that they could start a riot. Songs that made one feel like an honest rebel just for singing.  Man, Twelfth Perigee’s Eve carols are hardcore! Well, maybe not outside of that context.

And hours stretched on and on and the three friends drew closer until crammed together on a single couch cushion.  The smiles were genuine and the hands gestured naturally as they spoke about what happened sweeps ago and what might in the sweeps from then.

The softest, weakest bits of sunlight slipped in through the shades as dawn broke, getting a gasp out of Chixie.

“I didn’t mean to keep you out so late!” she apologized.  The light was dim enough to walk in but highblood customs involved drugs and destructive raiding well into the morning.  As one could imagine, it wasn’t safe.

“You’re fine,” Cirava said.  “Cool if we crash here?”

“Sure!” she replied.  “I just have the one ‘cuperacoon though.”

“Cirava can take… the couch,” said Charun.  “I just need… some pillows….”

“Well, actually, if you two don’t mind, maybe we can share it?”

“You sure…?  That wasn’t...virgin punch… it was still spiked….”

“Yeah, Chix, you really okay with this?  We can sleep out here.”

“I’m sure!  If you don’t want to, you don’t have to, but it’ll probably be much more comfortable.”  There was a slight pause as she gathered up the courage to say, “I trust you guys.”

That came as a pleasant surprise to both of them.

“Alright,” Cirava said, followed by Charun some time after.

They barricaded the doors, not that it would really stop anyone, but it did make them feel a little better, and Chixie led the way to her respite block

There they took their waking clothes off and realized just how wonderfully not-awkward it all was.  At no point did they feel like they should be ashamed or that they shouldn’t do it. Though it did get them all cracking up about a conversation they had earlier that sweep, about how if they couldn’t fill their quadrants in adulthood, they’d somehow find each other and pail.

“I really hope that’s not the case,” Cirava said after a good chuckle, “for your sakes.  I wouldn’t want either of you having to fill a bucket with my ugly mug.”

“That’s what…” Charun replied, “...paper bags are for…!”

And there was another round of hearty laughter as they all squeezed in together.  Admittedly, it was a tight fit, but not uncomfortable. Three kids in one recuperacoon.  That would have been some kind of safety code violation if there existed safety codes to violate on Alternia.  Besides the basic “do not fuck with the drones” but that was more common sense.

They realized just before drifting off that they were all holding hands.  And that morning with its cloudy skies and lazy sunshine was the most restful sleep any of them ever had.