#agaIN THERE ARE PROBABLY BETTER EXAMPLES BUT THESE WERE ALL I COULD FIND

[mcmansionhell]

the motel room, or: on datedness

I.

Often I find myself nostalgic for things that haven't disappeared yet. This feeling is enhanced by the strange conviction that once I stop looking at these things, I will never see them again, that I am living in the last moment of looking. This is sense is strongest for me in the interiors of buildings perhaps because, like items of clothing, they are of a fashionable nature, in other words, more impermanent than they probably should be.

As I get older, to stumble on something truly dated, once a drag, is now a gift. After over a decade of real estate aggregation and the havoc it's wreaked on how we as a society perceive and decorate houses, if you're going to Zillow to search for the dated (which used to be like shooting fish in a barrel), you'll be searching aimlessly, for hours, to increasingly no avail, even with all the filters engaged. (The only way to get around this is locational knowledge of datedness gleaned from the real world.) If you try to find images of the dated elsewhere on the internet, you will find that the search is not intuitive. In this day and age, you cannot simply Google "80s hotel room" anymore, what with the disintegration of the search engine ecosystem and the AI generated nonsense and the algorithmic preference for something popular (the same specific images collected over and over again on social media), recent, and usually a derivative of the original search query (in this case, finding material along the lines of r/nostalgia or the Backrooms.)

To find what one is looking for online, one must game the search engine with filters that only show content predating 2021, or, even better, use existing resources (or those previously discovered) both online and in print. In the physical world of interiors, to find what one is looking for one must also now lurk around obscure places, and often outside the realm of the domestic which is so beholden to and cursed by the churn of fashion and the logic of speculation. Our open world is rapidly closing, while, paradoxically, remaining ostensibly open. It's true, I can open Zillow. I can still search. In the curated, aggregated realm, it is becoming harder and harder to find, and ultimately, to look.

But what if, despite all these changes, datedness was never really searchable? This is a strange symmetry, one could say an obscurity, between interiors and online. It is perhaps unintentional, and it lurks in the places where searching doesn't work, one because no one is searching there, or two, because an aesthetic, for all our cataloguing, curation, aggregation, hoarding, is not inherently indexable and even if it was, there are vasts swaths of the internet and the world that are not categorized via certain - or any - parameters. The internet curator's job is to find them and aggregate them, but it becomes harder and harder to do. They can only be stumbled upon or known in an outside, offline, historical or situational way. If to index, to aggregate, is, or at least was for the last 30 years, to profit (whether monetarily or in likes), then to be dated, in many respects, is the aesthetic manifestation of barely breaking even. Of not starting, preserving, or reinventing but just doing a job.

We see this online as well. While the old-web Geocities look and later Blingee MySpace-era swag have become aestheticized and fetishized, a kind of naive art for a naive time, a great many old websites have not received the same treatment. These are no less naive but they are harder to repackage or commodify because they are simple and boring. They are not "core" enough.

As with interiors, web datedness can be found in part or as a whole. For example, sites like Imgur or Reddit are not in and of themselves dated but they are full of remnants, of 15-year old posts and their "you, sir, have won the internet" vernacular that certainly are. Other websites are dated because they were made a long time ago by and for a clientele that doesn't have a need or the skill to update (we see this often with Web 2.0 e-commerce sites that figured out how to do a basic mobile page and reckoned it was enough). The next language of datedness, like the all-white landlord-special interior, is the default, clean Squarespace restaurant page, a landing space that's the digital equivalent of a flyer, rarely gleaned unless someone needs a menu, has a food allergy or if information about the place is not available immediately from Google Maps. I say this only to maintain that there is a continuity in practices between the on- and off-line world beyond what we would immediately assume, and that we cannot blame everything on algorithms.

But now you may ask, what is, exactly, datedness? Having spent two days in a distinctly dated hotel room, I've decided to sit in utter boredom with the numinous past and try and pin it down.

II.

I am in an obscure place. I am in Saint-Georges, Quebec, Canada, on assignment. I am staying at a specific motel, the Voyageur. By my estimation the hotel was originally built in the late seventies and I'd be shocked if it was older than 1989. The hotel exterior was remodeled sometime in the 2000s with EIFS cladding and beige paint. Above is a picture of my room, which, forgive me, is in the process of being inhabited. American (and to a lesser extent Canadian) hotel rooms are some of the most churned through, renovated spaces in the world, and it's pretty rare, unless you're staying in either very small towns or are forced by economic necessity to stay at real holes in the wall, to find ones from this era. The last real hitter for me was a 90s Day's Inn in the meme-famous Breezewood, PA during the pandemic.

At first my reaction to seeing the room was cautionary. It was the last room in town, and certainly compared to other options, probably not the world's first choice. However, after staying in real, genuine European shitholes covering professional cycling I've become a class-A connoisseur of bad rooms. This one was definitively three stars. A mutter of "okay time to do a quick look through." But upon further inspection (post-bedbug paranoia) I came to the realization that maybe the always-new brainrot I'd been so critical of had seeped a teeny bit into my own subconscious and here I was snubbing my nose at a blessing in disguise. The room is not a bad room, nor is it unclean. It's just old. It's dated. We are sentimental about interiors like this now because they are disappearing, but they are for my parents what 2005 beige-core is for me and what 2010s greige will become for the generation after. When I'm writing about datedness, I'm writing in general using a previous era's examples because datedness, by its very nature, is a transitional status. Its end state is the mixed emotion of seeing things for what they are yet still appreciating them, expressed here.

Datedness is the period between vintage and contemporary. It is the sentiment between quotidian and subpar. It is uncurated and preserved only by way of inertia, not initiative. It gives us a specific feeling we don't necessarily like, one that is deliberately evoked in the media subcultures surrounding so-called "liminal" spaces: the fuguelike feeling of being spatially trapped in a time while our real time is passing. Datedness in the real world is not a curated experience, it is only what was. It is different from nostalgia because it is not deliberately remembered, yearned for or attached to sweetness. Instead, it is somehow annoying. It is like stumbling into the world of adults as a child, but now you're the adult and the child in you is disappointed. (The real child-you forgot a dull hotel room the moment something more interesting came along.) An image of my father puts his car keys on the table, looks around and says, "It'll do." We have an intolerance for datedness because it is the realization of what sufficed. Sufficiency in many ways implies lack.

However, for all its datedness, many, if not all, of the things in this room will never be seen again if the room is renovated. They will become unpurchaseable and extinct. Things like the bizarrely-patterned linoleum tile in the shower, the hose connecting to the specific faucet of the once-luxurious (or at least middling) jacuzzi tub whose jets haven't been exercised since the fall of the Berlin Wall. The wide berth of the tank on the toilet. There is nothing, really, worth saving about these things. Even the most sentimental among us wouldn't dare argue that the items and finishes in this room are particularly important from a design or historical standpoint. Not everything old has a patina. They're too cheaply made to salvage. Plastic tile. Bowed plywood. The image-artifacts of these rooms, gussied up for Booking dot com, will also, inevitably disappear, relegated to the dustheap of web caches and comments that say "it was ok kinda expensive but close to twon (sic)." You wouldn't be able to find them anyway unless you were looking for a room.

One does, of course, recognize a little bit of design in what's here. Signifiers of an era. The wood-veneer of the late 70s giving way to the pastel overtones of the 80s. Perhaps even a slow 90s. The all-in-one vanity floating above the floor, a modernist basement bathroom hallmark. White walls as a sign of cleanliness. Gestures, in the curved lines of the nightstands, towards postmodernity. Metallic lamp bases with wide-brimmed shades, a whisper of glamor. A kind of scalloped aura to the club chairs. The color teal mediated through hundreds if not thousands of shoes. Yellowing plastic, including the strips of "molding" that visually tie floor to wall. These are remnants (or are they intuitions?) of so many movements and micromovements, none of them definite enough to point to the influence of a single designer, hell, even of a single decade, just strands of past-ness accumulated into one thread, which is cheapness. Continuity exists in the materials only because everything was purchased as a set from a wholesale catalog.

In some way a hotel is supposed to be placeless. Anonymous. Everything tries to be that way now, even houses. Perhaps because we don't like the way we spy on ourselves and lease our images out to the world so we crave the specificity of hotel anonymity, of someplace we move through on our way to bigger, better or at least different things. The hotel was designed to be frictionless but because it is in a little town, it sees little use and because it sees little use, there are elements that can last far longer than they were intended and which inadvertently cause friction. (The janky door unlocks with a key. The shower hose keeps coming out of the faucet. It's deeply annoying.)

Lack of wear and lack of funds only keep them that way. Not even the paper goods of the eighties have been exhausted yet. Datedness is not a choice but an inevitability. Because it is not a choice, it is not advertised except in a utilitarian sense. It is kept subtle on the hotel websites, out of shame. Because it does not subscribe to an advertiser's economy of the now, of the curated type rather than the "here is my service" type, it disappears into the folds of the earth and cannot be searched for in the way "design" can. It can only be discovered by accident.

When I look at all of these objects and things, I do so knowing I will never see them again, at least not all here together like this, as a cohesive whole assembled for a specific purpose. I don't think I'll ever have reason to come back to this town or this place, which has given me an unexpected experience of being peevish in my father's time. Whenever I end up in a place like this, where all is as it was, I get the sense that it will take a very long time for others to experience this sensation again with the things my generation has made. The machinations of fashion work rapaciously to make sure that nothing is ever old, not people, not rooms, not items, not furniture, not fabrics, not even design, that old matron who loves to wax poetic about futurity and timelessness. The plastic-veneered particleboard used here is now the bedrock of countless landfills. Eventually it will become the chemical-laced soil upon which we build our condos. It is possible that we are standing now at the very last frontier of our prior datedness. The next one has not yet elided. It's a special place. Spend a night. Take pictures.

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[vetyr]

hi, i ireally love your work and i don't know if you've answered this before but, what kinds of studies do you do or how did you learn color theory? i wanna get better at rendering and anatomy but im having trouble TT TT

Hi! Long answer alert. Once a chatterbox, always a chatterbox.

When I started actively learning how to draw about 10 1/2 years ago, I exclusively did graphite studies in sketchbooks. Here's a few examples—I mostly stuck to doing line drawings to drill basic shapes/contours and proportions into my brain. The more rendered sketches helped me practice edge control & basic values, and they were REALLY good for learning the actual 3D structure behind what I was drawing.

I'd use reference images that I grabbed from fitness forums, Instagram, Tumblr, Pinterest, and some NSFW places, but you could find adequate ref material from figure drawing sites like Line of Action. LoA has refs for people (you can filter by clothed/unclothed, age, & gender), animals, expressions, hands/feet, and a few other useful things as well. Love them.

Learning how to render digitally was a similar story; it helped a lot that I had a pretty strong foundation for value/anatomy going in. I basically didn't touch color at all for ~2 years (except for a few attempts at bad digital or acrylic paint studies), which may not have been the best idea. I learned color from a lot of trial and error, honestly, and I'm pretty sure this process involved a lot of imitation—there were a number of digital/traditional painters whose styles I really wanted to emulate (notably their edge control, color choices, value distributions, and shape design), so I kiiind of did a mixture of that + my own experimentation.

For example, I really found Benjamin Björklund's style appealing, especially his softened/lost edges & vibrant pops of saturated color, so here's a study I did from some photograph that I'm *pretty* sure was painted with him in mind.

Learning how to detail was definitely a slow process, and like all the aforementioned things (anatomy/color/edge control/values/etc.) I'm still figuring it out. Focusing on edge control first (that is, deciding on where to place hard/soft edges for emphasizing/de-emphasizing certain areas of the image) is super useful, because you can honestly fool a viewer into thinking there's more detail in a piece than there actually is if you're very economical about where you place your hard edges.

The most important part, to me, is probably just doing this stuff over and over again. You're likely not going to see improvement in a few weeks or even a few months, so don't fret about not getting the exact results you want and just keep studying + making art. I like to think about learning art as a process where you *need* to fail and make crappy art/studies—there's literally no way around it—so you might as well fail right now. See, by making bad art you're actually moving forward—isn't that a fun prospect!!

It's useful to have a folder with art you admire, especially if you can dissect the pieces and understand why you like them so much. You can study those aspects (like, you can redraw or repaint that person's work) and break down whether this is art that you just like to look at, or if it's the kind of art that you want to *make.* There's a LOT of art out there that I love looking at, probably tens of thousands of styles/mediums, but there's a very narrow range that I want to make myself.

I've mentioned it in some ask reply in the past, but I really do think looking at other artist's work is such a cheat code for improving your own skills—the other artist does the work to filter reality/ideas for you, and this sort of allows you to contact the subject matter more directly. I can think of so many examples where an artist I admired exaggerated, like, the way sunlight rested on a face and created that orange fringe around its edge, or the greys/dull blues in a wheat field, or the bright indigo in a cast shadow, or the red along the outside of a person's eye, and it just clicked for me that this was a very available & observable aspect of reality, which had up until that point gone completely unnoticed! If you're really perceptive about the art you look at, it's shocking how much it can teach you about how to see the world (in this particular case I mean this literally, in that the art I looked at fully changed the way I visually processed the world, but of course it has had a strong effect on my worldviews/relationships/beliefs).

Thanks so much for sending in a question (& for reading, if you got this far)! I read every single ask I receive, including the kind words & compliments, which I genuinely always appreciate. Best of luck with learning, my friend :)

[mommypieck]

𑄽୧ mutual masturbation with yuuji𔓘 ᰍ

kinktober day 13: touch me please!!!

✿ aged up!yuuji itadori x jealous!reader

✿ warnings: masturbation, fingering, jerking off

You and Yuuji have been best friends ever since you were little. He was always the bubbly golden retriever, and you were his shy black cat. he always stood by you when you were little, and he always stands by you now.

"And then she asked for my number," he exclaims, showing his hands all around. His smile is bright, and you're happy for him. He's so delighted that a girl hit on him for the first time. But there's something inside of you, that tells you it shouldn't be that way.

"What do you think of her?" Yuuji asks, almost breaking your nose with his phone. The girl in the picture is pretty, but you feel like Yuuji could get someone even prettier. For example, you think you are way cuter than that girl.

"Do you think I could lose my virginity to her?" The questions throw you off guard. Of course, you know that Yuuji is a virgin, but you didn't think he would lose it to someone he just met.

"Maybe we can practice," you mutter shyly, you don't want him to go and fuck some other girl. He kissed you when you were little, and even though you're both adults now, you can still feel that kiss on your lips

"Like to have sex?" he asks you, his eyes wide. You snort at him, "Of course not sex, but you probably don't know where the clit is."

He almost looks offended by your statement. Of course, he knows where the clit is, he thinks to himself. Gojo told him it was another name for the pee hole.

"You can just teach me a bit," you tell him, looking at him skeptically. His face suddenly turns serious, and you can see the wheels turning in his head.

"Okay." he breathes into your ear.

"Is this okay?" he asks, his hand traveling up your skirt. He almost whines when his fingers meet the warmth of your pussy. Yuuji rubs you over your panties, he's inexperienced, but he thinks he has an idea of what he's doing. You let out a surprised moan when he finds your clit.

"Did I find it?" he shoots you a teeth-full smile. You nod, he, in fact, found it so quickly. he hooks his fingers on the hem of your panties, pulling them down your legs. It's awkward with you sitting next to him, but he managed to do it.

"Oh my god." he moans, staring wide-eyed at your pussy. You want to slap him at that moment.

"What's the matter?" you ask him as you bite your lip.

"It's my first time seeing real pussy." he confesses, making you roll your eyes. You open your legs a bit more for him to get a better look, earning a whine from him.

"Do you want to touch me too?" he asks you, grabbing the tent in his pants and shoving it in your direction. You nod shyly, unable to look at him.

Your hand reaches out to cup him over his own hand, moving your hand with his own. he pulls down his pants, giving him a perfect view of the bulge in his boxers. You suppose he's big even though you have never seen a dick before.

Your hand slides into his boxers, fingers just gazing against his hard-on. You feel the veins on his dick under your fingers flexing. Your hand finds his tip, and you cringe at the slimy precum on the top.

He pulls his boxers down, finally revealing the hard-on you were playing with. You shut your lips shut, he's so pretty. He's pretty pink with his tip being a bit darker than the rest.

Your body shuffles closer to his, and you lay your head on his shoulder. Your hand cups his dick again, and you wrap your fist around him. Yuuji moans, and you can't help but think about how perfectly he fits in your hand.

While you're occupied with studying his cock, his own hand finds your pussy again. He tries to look for your clit again, and after a few swipes, he finds it again.

You lay side by side, your hand on his cock while he is between your legs. Both of you don't say anything. The only sounds are heavy breathing and moans and whines.

His fingers tease your opening, collecting all your juices on his digits. You jump a little at his gesture, closing your legs around his hand.

"Come on, let me touch you inside," he whines, pulling your legs apart so he can touch you again. You shake his head, there is no way you are gonna let him finger you.

"I'm gonna give you a kiss if you let me put fingers inside." Yuuji offers you, and your ears perk up. Maybe if he kisses you, he's gonna forget all about that other girl. You think for a moment before pecking his lips in a quick kiss, catching him off guard. He smiles at you, and he plants a kiss into your hair.

He carefully pushes one of his fingers inside, making you wince in pain. even just one digit is too big for you. Your hand speeds on his cock, trying to find some distraction from his hand. You have to agree that his finger doesn't feel as bad inside of you. It's a bit strange, but the spot he massages makes you see stars.

His whole palm is pressed against your pussy, adding pressure on your clit while he discovers your insides.

You can feel his twitching in your hand, indicating he's super close. Your focus is set on his cock, you wanna see how it looks when he cums. You grip him a little tighter, jerking him faster. It takes a few tugs before he's cumming all over your hand.

His hand between your legs doesn't stop, in fact, it gets rougher, trying to bring you to your orgasm too. Your stomach feels weird, and your whole body tenses as you cum. Your body jerks on its own as you ride out your orgasm.

You don't realize you closed your eyes until you see him smiling up at you. He looks like an angel, his eyes screaming a worried look.

"Did you like it?" he asks you, making you hide your face in the crook of his neck. He can feel your hot cheeks telling him that you did.

"I am not gonna answer that girl. I liked being like this with you."

taglist: @mcharris747 @huuuuut30 @krispsprite @bejewelledd @cawwn @veryninjanacho @jamayah @dngerwayz @nwptune @universlypiratecolor @ffakegucci @merachannie @d1lf-luvr @th3girln3xtdoor @nobody289x @iheartpieck @gia999 @kawasgirl @st4rrlighttt @candyeyeroll @7haze @banchangsbbbg @nigthmar3moon @softlilpeachxx @d1gitalbath @jaenniii

@satorustar @balenciagarette

[lucysarah-c]

"Those are my fries, and those are yours,"

"Come on! Does it really make a difference if I take just one?" You retorted.

"Settled accounts keep old friends," he mumbled, mouth half full of food.

You giggled as he took off the top bun from his burger, piled on a bunch of fries, and took a huge bite. The scene was downright chaotic, and you burst out laughing. Levi, who normally cared about appearances, was wolfing down the McDonald's meal with an intensity that didn’t quite match the polished image he’d shown earlier, even though that suit probably cost a fortune.

Ketchup stuck to the corner of his mouth as he raised an eyebrow, silently questioning what was so funny. Once he'd swallowed, he muttered, "Eat before the fries get cold. They taste horrible like that."

You couldn't help but reflect on how the night had gone. The House of CB dress you'd bought and saved for a special occasion, the hair you had done at the salon, the makeup you practiced to mimic the subtle but lovely glam of the latest Bridgerton season—none of that had been planned for you to end up in your boyfriend's car, surrounded by a ridiculous amount of fast food from a drive-thru at 11 p.m.

The empty parking lot outside, with snow accumulating, could have been eerie if you weren’t sitting next to Levi. Fries slathered in extra cheddar sauce were scattered everywhere, and Levi shoveled them into his mouth without a care. No lights, no music, but it didn't matter—you felt safe with him, though neither of you was keen on tempting fate by keeping the car lights on in the middle of nowhere.

Taking a bite of your own burger, you chuckled again. "I don't think I've ever seen you this hungry."

Levi paused mid-chew to take a swig of his Coke. "Tch, those posh assholes. They dragged me around for hours—hours! Examples of this, representation of that, and handshakes with whoever. From 3 p.m.! They didn’t even let me grab a sandwich at the reception. Finally, they serve dinner at 10—TEN!" he grumbled, the delay clearly having been the final straw. "And what did they serve? One shrimp, a tiny cube of cheese, and some grass they picked from outside and called a gourmet dinner."

"Rich people don’t eat much; that’s why," you teased. "It’s fancy to have tiny portions on huge plates."

"That’s because they’re all on Ozempic, buying up medicine that people actually need. Fuck them," he muttered.

On any other occasion, Levi would’ve cursed you for eating in his car, but tonight he made an exception. "How are my ice creams?"

Levi glanced outside where the ice creams were stored in the cold air to keep from melting. Processing your words, he turned back to you. "My ice creams? You mean ours."

"Oh, Levi, aren’t you going to gift me one? What kind of gentleman are you?" you teased.

"Right now, I’d bite your arm off if it weren’t for the fact that McDonald’s is still open," he replied with a smirk.

You laughed again. It had been the government holiday party, and you’d been so excited to attend, ready to rub elbows with high society. One of the older women had even told you, "You should've asked for a brand to sponsor your dress, coming as Levi’s plus-one!" Erwin had insisted that Levi attend as a representative of the Ackerman family, much to your boyfriend's dismay. Uri had agreed, probably because any option was better than Kenny for a formal event.

"Erwin will kill you when he finds out," you said, remembering how Levi had messaged you to sneak out. You’d never imagined he’d drag you through a bathroom window, across the estate grounds, and into his car for a McDonald’s run. "What about Uri? I ran into him during dinner. He was so nice!"

Levi hummed in approval, acknowledging that the old man had always been a saint in his eyes. The only one capable of dealing with Kenny for so many years.

Suddenly, Levi's phone lit up, its ringtone breaking the quiet. "Fuck!" you panicked.

"Don’t answer. If we do, they’ll know I’m reachable," Levi said, ignoring the calls.

Message after message flooded his phone—texts from Uri, Traute, and Erwin: Where are you? Levi, answer the phone ASAP. Come back here this instant.

The calls came in one after another.

"They won’t stop," you muttered. "Maybe we should just tell them—"

"No. They’d send the national guard to drag me back to that snob-filled hell," Levi spat. Despite not picking up, both of you whispered as if the unanswered calls could somehow hear.

At some point, the whole situation became hilarious. You found yourself resting your head on his shoulder, chuckling as the phone buzzed incessantly. Levi kept refusing to answer, and in the midst of it all, you shared sloppy kisses in the darkened car.

"I’ve got an idea…" you said, a mischievous glint in your eye. Levi looked at you, confused, the noise from the phone distracting from the moment you were building.

Casually, you swiped up on the screen and answered. "Levi? Where are—"

With a fake gasp and an exaggerated tone, you moaned, "Ah, Lev—Yes!"

Levi had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing as he realized what you were doing. "Play along," you whispered. And before you knew it, he began thumping the side door, mimicking the sound of… well, thrusts.

"Harder!" you managed between giggles before the call abruptly ended, leaving both of you in hysterics.

"Well, they’re definitely not calling anymore," Levi shook his head, still grinning, knowing full well this prank wouldn’t go unpunished.

"You can always say we were busy working on the Ackerman heir they keep asking for," you teased.

Levi grimaced, entertained by the thought. "I mean…" His hand slid up your thigh, the mood shifting as his touch grew more insistent. "We could actually be doing that."

Your hips began to move slightly over his lap. A quick glance at the clock—the only light inside the car—showed 12:05 a.m. Finally past midnight. "Whatever the birthday boy wants," you purred.

—

"He picked up? What did he say, sir?" Traute asked irritably in the event staff area, where they were waiting to bring out the enormous, decorated cake for the final part of the evening.

Uri chuckled, a faint blush coloring his cheeks. "I think he’s already celebrating. Let’s just carry on."

(No idea what this is, the idea just pop up in my mind)

Link to my masterlist and my other works if you feel like checking them out. Tags!: @nube55 @justkon @notgoodforlife @nmlkys @humanitys-strongest-bamf @quillinhand @thoreeo @darkstarlight82 @aomi04 @levisbrat25 @fxnnyackerman @secretmoneybearvoid @trashblackrainbow @l3visthighs @hannieslovebot @flxrartsstuff @feelingsandemotionsnotexplored @starrylevi @rithty @mariaace @ackrmntea @emilyyyy-08 @levisfavoriteteashop @katestrophes @katharinasdiaryy @ackermanswifee @levistealeaf @an-ever-angry-bi @youre-ackermine @searriously @blackdxggr @storiesofsung @abiatackerman @braunsbabe @moonchild-12345 @galactict3a @lemonsupernova @hyuckwon-my-husbands @heyitsd1yaa @sydneyyuu @love-for-faeries-go-burrrr @mandaax @sugacor3 @r0ckst4rjk @vegetasgirl2799 @catiwinky @pinksaiyans @sparklykeylime Wanna join my tag list? Here!

[jonnywaistcoat]

Hey, Horrormaster Sims. I have a wildly different question that barely relates to TMA (Sorry about that) but its about your own process. Please, if you could, can you tell me how your first drafts made you feel? I'm on the fence about writing my own thing (not a podcast, and again, not Magnus related, though I have a million little aus for that delightful tragedy you wrote, thank you for that!) But I'm discouraged by the collective notion that first drafts are always terrible, because there's no ... examples I can solidly use to help the dumb anxiety beast in my brain that tells me everyone who is in any way popular popped out a golden turd and not, well, you know. One of my friends said 'Oh I bet Jonathan Sims's first draft was nothing like what he wanted' and I got the bright idea to just. Send you an ask, since you're trapped on this hellsite like I am. Anyway, thanks for reading this (if you do) and if you'd rather ask it privately, I am cool with that. Alternatively, you're a hella busy man with Protocol (you and Alex are making me rabid, i hope you know) and you can just ignore this! Cheers, man, and good words.

To my mind all writing advice, especially stuff that's dispensed as truisms (like "first drafts are always garbage") are only useful inasmuch as such advice prompts you to pay attention to how you write best: what helps your workflow, what inspires you, what keeps you going through the rough bits. There are as many different ways to write (and write well) as there are people who write and so always consider this sort of thing a jumping off point to try out or keep in mind as you gradually figure out your own ways of writing.

On first drafts specifically, I think the wisdom "all first drafts are bad" is a bit of unhelpful oversimplification of the fact that, deadlines notwithstanding, no piece of writing goes out until you decide its ready, so don't get too hung up on your first draft of a thing, because a lot of writers find it much easier to edit a complete work than to try and redraft as they go. It's also important to not let perfectionism or the fact your initial draft isn't coming out exactly how you want stop you from actually finishing the thing, as it's always better to have something decent and done than to have something perfect and abandoned.

But the idea of a "first draft" is also kind of a fluid one. The "first draft" you submit to someone who's commissioned you will probably be one you've already done a bunch of tweaks and edits to, as opposed to the "first draft" you pump out in a frenzy in an over-caffeinated weekend. For my part, my first drafts tend to end up a bit more polished than most, because I'm in the habit of reading my sentences out loud as I write them (a habit picked up from years of audio writing) so I'll often write and re-write a particular sentence or paragraph a few times to get the rhythm right before moving to the next one. This means my first drafts tend to take longer, but are a bit less messy. I'm also a big-time planner and pretty good at sticking to the structures I lay out so, again, tend to front load a lot of stuff so I get a better but slower first draft.

At the end of the day, though, the important thing is to get in your head about it in a good way (How do I write best? what helps me make writing I enjoy and value? What keeps me motivated?) and not in a bad way (What if it's not good enough? What if everyone hates it? What if it doesn't make sense?) so that you actually get it done.

As for how my first drafts made me feel? Terrible, every one of 'em No idea if that's reflective of their quality, though, tbh - I hate reading my own writing until I've had a chance to forget it's mine (I can only ever see the flaws). I suppose there's theoretically a none-zero chance they were pure fragments of True Art and creative perfection, but Alex's editing notes make that seem unlikely.

[knuppitalism-with-ue]

Something that has both fascinated me and frustrated me to no end as of late are the lacrimal crests of allosauroids and other such theropods. No living theropods, to my knowledge, possess such structures. The closest analog I could find were Geese. I'm being driven up a wall trying to figure out what they would have been covered with in life. How would they have been incorporated into the face of the theropod? What display structures could they support? Air sacs, keratin, or caruncles? How pneumatized were they? Were they even for display? Most paleoartists just reconstruct them as odd stones sitting on top of the animals head, or say they were just for shading the eyes, but that can't be it, right? It feels like something is missing.

As a Paleoartist, is there anything you can say on this? Because I don't know nearly enough.

Oh boi, this is a tricky one.

Cranial ornaments come in all kinds of shapes, sizes and surface textures. For Allosaurus it seems likely that they simply had keratin sheets on top of the lacrinal crests, at least that's what the rough surface and striations suggest. However it also seems like air sacs were reaching up from the antorbital fenestra

This is how I would reconstruct that part of Allosaurus in the moment.

There could have been more though, you can see in this photo of the skull of Big Al II that this animal had large opening behind the lacrinal crests, so there could have been other structures involved.

Maybe even better to look at is this 3d scan of Arkhane, from Brussels.

This could have been related to theroregulation, more display structures or simply further weight reduction.

There is quite a bit of wiggle room when it comes to the interpretation of dinosaur facial features and there is way too much already published and at the same time too little to put it all into a single blog post.

Also not all dinosaurus follow this patters, the cranial crests of oviraptorosaurs show no good indication for keratin crests for example. So it's better to say good bye to cassowary interpretations of these animals and instead cover them in skin and/or inflatable sacs, because these hollow chambers appear to be extensions of the sinuses. (my version of Corythoraptor on the right, Citipati from Wikipedia on the left.)

And then again in other theropods like Abelisaurs we see very rugose skull tops but without the striations you see on the lacrinals of Allosaurus, potentially indicating large scales. Here my, slightly over the top, interpretation of Skorpiovenator. And even then: within abelisaurus you have stuff like Carnotaurus which shows clear signs of keratin sheets on its horns.

This all has been complicated in recent years with new methods in bone histology, because as it turns out the internal structure of a bone can tell us stuff about it's outside, that's how we for example found out that Amargosaurus neck spines were no horns and probably conected with soft tissue, or that the osteoderms of notosuchians were covered by skin like in leatherback turtles.

Going back to Allosaurus and other allosauroids. Keratin sheets, scales, air sacs, all these were probably present in these animals, but their exact distribution is still a question of debate.

Here a paper from a few years back that maps para-nasal sinuses in extent and extinct archosaurus which gives you a little idea how complex their internal anatomy could get

https://anatomypubs.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/pdfdirect/10.1002/ar.20794

[stick2vamp]

Halllo and welcome to the Sebastian Solace fans!!

This interest me, Im in the Welcome home fandom and one of the characters is self-aware so I've wondering if Sebastian is self aware that he know the player is just playing game

What is his reaction? (It's okay if you don't want to- I can request other one- ÚvÚ

That's all and have a lovely Day or Night

𝜗 ˖ ❝ you're not what you seem. ᵕ ♡

— in which sebastian realizes something is off with you, and everything else that's ever known. ✧

↷　 sfw 𓈒 implied sebastian uses you a bit 𓈒 no happy ending 𓈒

When SEBASTIAN figures out that he is nothing more than a character in a videogame, one who has no control over the ending of the story, he is upset for a lack of better words.

It made sense, now that he thought about it. Why his memories of the past were oddly fuzzy as if they weren't truly his, why he never seemed to be unable to find things for his shop, why you kept coming back over and over again.

He's mad both at himself and you and the situation: himself for not realizing sooner, how could he be so stupid? You for never mentioning it to him, although you very well knew. And the situation: because that means everything he went through didn't have to happen, and was made for someone else's enjoyment.

In the midst of his anger, though, he realizes that you are trapped just as much as he is, if not more.

If everything was some game, some story, then that means only certain things had actually been written into existence. The path you followed on your journey, for example, was the only path there could be. Your goal couldn't be anything but getting the crystal.

Maybe he isn't real to you.

But his experiences were real.

His agony was real.

And he was real to himself.

Which is why he began to change things. You couldn't break your character's code, but he could break his. You'd occasionally hear little 'secret' voice lines that haven't ever played before, animations that seemed more lifelike and diverse. You'd see how Sebastian didn't show up just once anymore, no, he showed up frequently.

Yes, once you reached the end, you would be forced back to the beginning. But would he? It wasn't in his code to force him back, was it?

Sebastian began to stick by you more and more, trying to win your favor. It'd be easier to board with you if you grew attached — sympathetic towards him. It'd also be easier for you to give more documents. One of the only things you had control over was when you chose to buy from him. He endlessly looked through the research documents you gave him to see if there was anything about this: but nothing.

And when you finally had the crystal and were waiting for the submarine...

Sebastian swopped in and climbed into the submarine alongside you. You didn't put up a fight—well, you probably couldn't even if you wanted to. Luckily, there were no guards in the chamber, so he wouldn't be spotted until you made it to the surface.

He was finally going to be free again.

This may be a game, but it's his life.

He would finally —

— Sebastian was back in his shop once more.

Right, because games don't load their unused areas, oops!

[maybejj]

The Beginning of Us. Part 3

babydaddy!Rafe x sweetheart!reader

masterlist

warnings: mentions of child abuse, mentions of bruises/blood, slight flirting, slight possessive rafe ?

summary: You and Rafe were high school sweethearts that continued into college however Rafe went down the wrong path and you found out you were pregnant. 4 years later finds you and Rafe trying to navigate co-parenting your 3 year old son while overcoming life’s obstacles and past experiences.

word count: 2.2k

“Listen, I’m not going to make it. Rafe’s out of town and I don’t have anyone to watch Asher. I’m sorry, truly.” You apologized to Madeline over the phone while you continued to make dinner. Asher was at the kitchen table drawing in his coloring book, tongue sticking out to the side while he tried to color in the lines.

It was shaping up to be a quiet night when Madeline, one of your girlfriends, had called asking if you wanted to tag along to see the new romcom that was in theaters. You would normally jump at the opportunity to hangout with your friends but with Rafe out of town, you couldn’t leave Asher.

You heard your friend whine playfully on the other side of the phone, “Maybe you could get Sarah or Wheezie to watch him for a couple hours. You know they adore him.”

You squeezed your eyes closed tightly. You knew in your soul they would never hurt Asher. They weren’t capable of it and they did adore your son, worshipped the ground he walked on. They always showered him in love and gifts and hugs whenever they saw him but there was that voice in the back of your head that said it would happen again if you left Asher alone with anyone other than Rafe.

It had only been three months since it happened and you were still reaping the fallout from all the chaos. Asher was getting better, he could finally sleep in his own bed though it was you who held off on making him sleep alone because you wanted him close, wanted to protect him. Rafe was the one who gently coaxed you into letting Asher back in his room after sleeping in your bed for two months. You had sat outside your son’s bedroom door, hand over your mouth, quietly sobbing that whole night.

You sighed deeply as you turned to watch your son. He was so young and already he had been exposed to how cruel the world could be. You wouldn’t let that happen again.

You shook your head even though Madeline couldn’t see you, “They’re probably busy. I’ll have to rain check on this one but you guys have fun.”

There was silence on the phone for a moment before Madeline’s voice traveled through the speaker, her tone of voice held a hint of frustration and annoyance, “I know it’s been hard but you’re going to have to let people help you, Rafe won’t always be here. This is a prime example.”

You were stunned by her words, completely catching you off guard. You knew she could be blunt and up front but this was a sensitive topic.

“Until you have a son of your own, you don’t get to tell me what to do. Especially after someone beat him like a punching bag,” You said as you hung up abruptly. You set the phone down roughly on the kitchen counter while your hands came to rest on the top, your back turned to Asher. You closed your eyes once you started to feel the sting of tears. You dropped your head to your chest and counted to ten. You could feel yourself shaking as you tried to block out the images of seeing him in the hospital, the bruises, the blood. You could still hear Rafe’s frantic voice over the phone telling you to meet him at the hospital. It was the worst day of your life.

“Mommy?”

You sucked in a deep breath and quickly wiped your eyes before turning around. Asher was staring at you with wide eyes from the kitchen table, his drawing abandoned, “Yes, baby?”

He squinted his big green eyes at you, like he knew something was off but couldn’t explain it, “You seem sad. Like when I can’t find my favorite tractor.”

A laugh you couldn’t stop escaped from you, your hand coming up to cover your mouth as you started smiling, “Mommy’s okay. I promise. I was just counting to ten.”

You could see his little mind was going a mile a minute trying to make sure you weren’t lying to him. You always told him lying was frowned upon and that you should always tell the truth. He was a very intelligent toddler for only being three years old. He was very observant too, something he inherited from his father.

“Like you and daddy showed me when I get sad?” Asher quietly asked you. Your heart squeezed in your chest as he recalled what you and Rafe had taught him.

“Yes, baby. That’s exactly right,” you smiled sadly at him. It was something you and Rafe had taught him when he would get upset and didn’t know how to control his emotions. You had taught him to close his eyes and then slowly count to ten, with the hope that it would help clear his mind. After he had calmed down, you and Rafe would sit down with him while he tried to explain what he was feeling so you both could help him through it. Most of the time it worked.

“But that means you were sad mommy,” He furrowed his eyebrows at you while sliding off the chair, making his way towards you. Once he reached you, he wrapped both arms around your waist and hugged you tightly.

You gently put your hand on the top of his head, stroking his hair out of his face while you smiled down at him. You had so much love for this little boy. You were suppose to be there for him, protecting him and here he was doing it for you.

You squat down to your knees so you’re face to face and hug him closer. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and kiss his temple, “You are the sweetest little boy, Asher Cameron.”

You heard him giggle against your neck, “Daddy said I had to take care of you while he was gone since I’m the man of the house now.”

“Did he?” You say as you pull away from the hug, your eyebrows raising as you grin at him.

He nods excitedly. Just as you were about to respond, your computer starts to ring from the living room coffee table.

Asher instantly grabs your hand and drags you into the living room, dinner abandoned on the counter tops. You both plop down on the couch as Asher opens your laptop to an incoming FaceTime call from Rafe.

“It’s daddy!” Asher squealed while you laughed and pushed the green accept call button. Rafes face instantly popped up on screen. You could tell he was sitting against the headboard of his bed in the hotel room. He was currently in New York closing on a deal with a big corporation. As soon as you and Asher came into view, Rafe had a soft smile on his face.

“Hey big man, you taking care of mommy?”

Asher nodded his head and scooted closer to the screen to get closer to his father, “I am! I’m the man of the house now daddy, that’s what you said.”

You smiled at your son, shaking your head. Seeing Rafe and Asher interact never failed to give you butterflies. He was such a good dad to Asher. He always made time for him, no matter where he was. It made your heart squeeze in your chest in the best way possible.

You could hear Rafe’s laugh through the computer as he responded, “I did. It’s a big job I can only trust you with.”

“You can trust me daddy!” Your son said seriously, hand saluting to the computer. Rafe saluted back with a big smile on his face. Before Rafe could say anything more, Asher started talking about his tractor drawing he was working on before dinner. You gently sat back against the couch, tucking your knees underneath you as you watched the father and son talk back and forth. Asher was speaking fast and talking with his hands as he got excited about his drawing he couldn’t wait to show Rafe. It warmed your heart, this was exactly what you needed after the phone call with Madeline.

“And then mommy had to count to ten so I gave her a hug like you do when I get sad.”

Your eyes went wide as Asher recalled what happened in the kitchen just moments ago. Rafe’s attention shifted to you in the corner of the screen as he furrowed his eyebrows, talking a bit slower now, “You did good buddy. Just like we taught you. Why don’t you go finish your drawing so it’ll be done when I get home tomorrow, yeah?”

Asher immediately jumped up from the couch, briefly saying goodbye to his dad on the laptop before zooming to the kitchen table to do as his dad said. Once he was seated, you turned your attention back to Rafe who was already watching you. You leaned forward slightly to turn the volume down. You knew this conversation wasn’t for little ears.

“Anything you want to talk about?” Rafe quietly asked. He didn’t want to push you but he wanted to be there for you. It was a fine line he had been walking since Asher was born. You weren’t in a relationship but you still trusted him more than anyone else.

You glance back to make sure Asher was occupied before speaking softly, “Madeline called earlier. She just said some things that she shouldn’t have. Made me think about what happened.”

Even through the laptop screen, you could see Rafe’s jaw clench. His eyes slightly narrowing as he tried to think about what Madeline had said to you. He had never been fond of Madeline. He thought she was self centered and blunt. Not the kind of good blunt where people needed to hear the truth, it was the kind of blunt where she hurt people’s feelings on purpose to get what she wanted. She was what he classified as a mean girl. He didn’t understand why you were still friends with her but every time he brought it up you demanded he drop it.

Before Rafe could say anything you started talking again, “I already know what you’re thinking and after what was said I don’t think we’ll be hanging out anytime soon.”

“Good. Never liked the bitch anyways,” Rafe was smug when he responded. You rolled your eyes and checked on Asher to make sure he didn’t hear the swear word despite the volume being low.

Rafe hesitated before he spoke next, “Are you okay though?”

“Yeah, I’ll be okay,” You paused briefly before continuing, “I don’t know if you’ve heard but I’ve got a man of the house looking after me now,” You grinned as you brought your elbows to lay on your knees, hands resting under your chin.

Rafe let out a big, booming laugh. His hand came into the screen as he ran it across his chin, a huge grin sliding across his face, “The only man I’ll allow to take my place until I get back.”

You paused as you studied his face and his comment. Despite you two not being together, you did flirt back and forth with each other. It was just natural, you couldn’t stop it if you tried. Just because you weren’t together didn’t mean you no longer found him attractive and as he got older, he only got hotter. The buzz cut he got about a year ago was still your favorite look and made your mouth water.

“The only man you’ll allow, huh?” You countered back, a smirk tugging at your lips.

“Thats right, sweetheart. Don’t act like you got someone else. Besides, Asher would’ve spilled already,” He winked at you. You quietly laughed because you knew it was true. Asher and Rafe were two peas in a pod.

“Yeah I’m aware. My own son would sell me out,” You shook your head as you glanced down at your feet, smiling.

“As long as you have us, you don’t need another man,” Rafe said confidently, shrugging his shoulders.

“Like I want another man. You two are handfuls already,” You couldn’t even imagine starting a new relationship. Having to introduce them to Asher and Rafe. That just sounds like an experience you’d rather not go through. While Rafe was respectful of your boundaries, he still could get very jealous whether you two were dating or not. The good thing was you had no desire to start dating again. Your main focus was your son.

“And don’t you forget it,” He chuckled as he glanced at his watch, yawning. He started stretching his arms above his head as he said, “I should get some sleep. Early flight tomorrow.”

You nodded your head, tucking the hair behind your ear as it started to fall, “Get some rest. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

Rafe said his goodbyes and ended the phone call. You closed the laptop as you got up from the couch, ready to finish dinner. As you walked to the stove, you noticed Asher was almost done with his drawing. As you got closer, you could see he had drawn three stick figures in the corner of the page. One of the taller stick figures had long hair, which you assumed was you while the other stick figure stood taller than the rest. The last of the stick figures was small with green eyes, just like your son.

“Is that mommy and daddy holding your hands, baby?”

Asher nodded without glancing at you, too determined to finish his artwork, “You think daddy will like it?”

You leaned down to press a kiss to the top of his head, the love you have for your three year old bursting out of your chest, “Daddy will love it.”

[thankskenpenders]

Amy's fortune cards

The Sonic fandom has long been the kind of fandom that takes minor details very seriously, for better or worse. On the one hand, this means fans will really dig for the diamonds in the rough, latching onto fun character interactions, animations, bits of background worldbuilding, and more in pieces of Sonic media that many would write off as "the bad ones." But it also feels like every week another needlessly hostile debate over Sonic minutia erupts on Twitter, whether it's over individual lines of dialogue, fanart that makes Tails' shoes blue, or the ideal length and volume for Sonic's quills.

So it was probably inevitable that a fandom-wide debate would erupt upon seeing Amy's new gameplay style in the DLC for Sonic Frontiers, which takes the once-obscure fact that she enjoys reading tarot and shines a spotlight on it like never before.

I mean:

The thing is, while I basically always try to tune out Sonic fandom bickering... for once, I kind of sympathize with the detractors? Don't get me wrong, I like Amy's tarot stuff, and people on all sides of the discussion are being overly nasty about their opinions, as usual. (Sonic Twitter remains my personal hell.) But when I set aside the hyperbole and zoom out, I do think I understand why some fans are put off by the sudden shift in focus for the character, even if I think it's cool.

It's complicated. Let me attempt to present the cases for and against Amy's fortune cards

For years, I was always one of those fans who thought it could be fun if they played with Amy's tarot reading, or even leaned into some kind of magic with her. Part of that is my own biases showing, but there's just something that makes sense there, especially when you look at Sonic, Tails, and Amy as a trio. (I would argue that's the real "Team Sonic" these days, especially in the comics where Knuckles is more likely to be stuck on Angel Island or otherwise doing his own thing.)

You could argue that Tails is all about logic, relying on science and technology and deductive reasoning to solve problems. But Amy is all about emotion. She wears her heart on her sleeve, is extremely empathetic, and is very prone to magical thinking - both figuratively and sometimes literally. Her origin story has always been that her tarot cards told her it was her destiny to meet Sonic on Little Planet. She's claimed to be able to "sense" peoples' presences - particularly Sonic's. She's the type to believe that The Power of Love is a literal magical force. So, on some level, it makes sense to mirror Tails's science by having Sonic's other best friend believe in magic. And then Sonic is somewhere in the middle, primarily following his own gut instincts but taking advice from both of them as needed. This isn't totally accurate to how their dynamics actually function in canon stories, but I think it's a mode that could work for them.

Going off of that, it's fun to lean all the way into Amy being a magical girl, or even a witch, using her fortune telling as a foundation. Take, for example, this version of Amy from Diana Skelly's old Sonic cast redesigns from before she freelanced for Archie and IDW. This is one of MANY such redesigns for Amy.

Fast forward to the 2020s, and Amy's tarot cards are, in fact, finally getting brought up again in canon. Which is fun! I like seeing that. I like all of the individual stories involving Amy's fortune cards. This is a fun character trait for Amy, a fun nod to old lore, AND a fun storytelling device, all in one. It's really cool that the Sonic universe has its own thematically appropriate arcana, and that the cards are getting made as physical merch. And sure enough, the official card backs and borders were designed by none other than Diana Skelly, in yet another cool example of an ascendant fan leaving their mark on the series.

BUT... when you step back and look at the big picture, I get why some fans find this shift in focus jarring. At the moment, it's starting to feel like every new story about Amy involves her fortune cards to some degree.

The most recent mainline comic arc to feature Amy as the lead character, 2021's Trial by Fire arc, prominently features a sequence where she reads fortunes while camping with the girls. The Origins version of Sonic CD now bookends the game with scenes of Amy and her tarot cards. Sonic randomly mentioned it in a scene in Frontiers. And now, just this week, we got the (very cute, gorgeously illustrated) Amy's 30th Anniversary comic with a story revolving around Amy's tarot cards, followed the very next day by the Frontiers DLC in which she gets a brand new tarot-based moveset. Even her base melee attack now has her throwing tarot cards instead of swinging her hammer. Again, I like all of these individual things, but after years of it almost never coming up at all, it's VERY noticeable that Amy's tarot cards are suddenly everywhere.

To be fair, I'm looking at this from the perspective of a superfan who's actively following ALL Sonic media. Casual fans - especially kids - aren't necessarily going to be reading the comics every month, buying the thousandth rerelease of the Genesis games, or playing the ultra-hard new alternate ending DLC for a game that came out last year. Each of these stories is going to be someone's introduction to the idea that Amy can read tarot, and that's probably part of the idea behind this unified push.

But to play devil's advocate, for my fellow superfans, I understand why it feels like a very minor footnote of Amy's character is suddenly becoming the entire focus of her personality. While Amy has always been said to enjoy fortune telling, that wasn't really a character trait in and of itself, but rather an example of her being a typical girl who hopes she'll be able to find true love one day. It's less that Amy can literally predict the future and more like her using a cootie catcher or going "he loves me, he loves me not" while picking the petals off of a flower. So I get not vibing with this stuff, or feeling like it's being pushed very hard out of nowhere.

What I don't agree with are comparisons like "it's like if they made Knuckles' moveset revolve around him liking grapes." Like, I get it. Ian Flynn loves shoehorning in his little winking references for us nerds, and mentions of Amy's tarot cards were previously on the same level as other random bullet points from old Japanese manuals. But a multifaceted hobby like fortune telling that opens up so many narrative and aesthetic possibilities is obviously very different from having a favorite food. It's ALWAYS been a part of her story, not just a random fact, and there's no reason why the fortune telling can't be elevated to something more.

And, hell, even if it wasn't an established character trait, there's nothing inherently wrong with injecting new ideas into a character. One of the best Amy stories in recent years, the Free Comic Book Day special "Amy's New Hobby" written by Gale Galligan, came up with the idea that Amy's secretly been drawing little comics about her and her friends. Is this based on Lore? No. But it's cute, and helps tell the story of a younger Amy who's still coming out of her shell as both a hero and a friend.

Certain fans are also looking at Amy's Frontiers moveset and using it as evidence that once again the Vile American Contributors like Ian are CORRUPTING Sonic Team's perfect vision of Sonic with their misinterpretations. And like. Come on. Ian does not control the gameplay. He's a freelance writer. The tarot stuff is clearly something that Sonic Team likes if they made it the basis of Amy's new moveset - and, you know, if they keep approving comics and animations about Amy's fortune telling. None of this gets made without their blessing, and lord knows how much they can micromanage shit and shoot down ideas over the most minor of details.

Like, yeah, Amy's fortune telling was probably conceived less as a sign that she Knows Magic and more as a pretty mundane hobby for a lovesick young Japanese girl to have. But you're gonna sit there and tell me that using Amy's tarot cards for more than that could only be the result of a cultural misunderstanding? That nobody in Japan uses tarot card theming and aesthetics (or the general idea of magical cards) for the cool factor? Stardust Crusaders? Persona? The Astrologian class in FFXIV? Cardcaptor Sakura?? Hello??? Do you think Capcom put Gambit in Marvel vs. Capcom ironically because they thought using magic to throw cards at people was stupid? There's tons of precedent for this! It's nothing like Knuckles throwing grapes at people, be for real.

Giving Amy a very magical girl-esque moveset also just makes a lot of sense. For decades her hammer attacks have literally made sparkly heart shapes appear around her. Leaning into both that and her tarot cards in her new moveset makes a lot of sense to me.

But, admittedly... I do think it's very odd that her hammer is treated as a secondary element here, rather than having her primarily use her hammer and adding the cards for extra flair. If hitting the attack button made her swing her hammer instead of throwing cards, I'm not sure we'd even be having this discussion right now.

But the tarot-cycle and Amy riding her hammer like a witch's broom are fucking SICK and I will not concede on this point

The thing is, this whole fortune card discourse is but a small piece of a bigger problem. Amy's been a character who needed some work for ages, but there's basically nothing you can do with her without pissing SOMEONE off.

Years of stories where Amy's crush was her primary motivator and Sonic went "Ew, cooties!" have lead many casual fans to believe that being Sonic's obsessive fangirl is Amy's entire personality. At best people might call her Sonic's Minnie Mouse. This isn't just a matter of Amy having haters within the fandom - venture outside of that bubble and you'll realize that this is how MOST video game playing people seem to see her to this day. I don't feel like this is a fair assessment of the character, but this idea didn't come from nowhere. No matter how much good deeply entrenched Sonic fans may see in their old dynamic where Amy perpetually chases Sonic, this is a very real problem that Sonic Team has to contend with for their leading girl. Of course all those games where the way-past-cool protagonist thought Amy was annoyingly clingy and tried to get away from her made people think less of her.

If new stories were to go back to emphasizing Amy's crush on Sonic a little more, they'd probably be taken as confirmation that Amy's just the girl with a crush on Sonic and that this is her entire personality. Conversely, when the crush is played down, you piss off the hardcore SonAmy fans who don't seem to understand that they're Charlie Brown and Sega is Lucy holding the football. You can't win.

And so here we are. In the absence of what was once her defining trait, now reduced to an occasional blush or wink in Sonic's direction, new stories are trying to mine Amy's past for additional material to work with. Having been a thing fans wanted to see for years, right now we're getting a lot of tarot, but we're also getting reminders of her compassionate nature and her desire to go out of her way to help the little guy. This is an ongoing process. I continue to hope that her bubbly, exuberant demeanor can shine more in future stories. Now, I also hope that the tarot stuff gets balanced out a little better with other traits of hers. But I don't want it to go away. I think it's fun.

This course correcting is far from exclusive to Amy. Knuckles is getting stories that remind us that he's a competent fighter, an experienced treasure hunter, and even a self-taught archaeologist after years of him being perceived as either the dumb one or just the guy who stands in front of the Master Emerald all day. And Tails has been getting some stories reminding folks that he's a capable hero in his own right and not just Sonic's timid kid sidekick.

But no supporting character will ever compete with the sheer number of new ideas Sega has tried with Sonic himself. Like Amy, his Frontiers moveset has also given him half a dozen new superpowers that he never had before, from the Cyloop to air-slicing projectile attacks to his own take on Shadow Clone Jutsu and beyond. He's also been a hoverboarder, a swordsman, a time traveler, an Olympic athlete, a racecar driver, cursed with a Flame of Judgment, imbued with alien power, a fucking Werehog with stretchy powers, and on and on and on.

If Sonic can do all that, Amy can try out using a tarot-cycle.

Anyway TL;DR the REAL problem with Amy's current characterization... is where the FUCK is Amy's bestie, Honey the Cat???????

[uyuforu]

Astro Observations: Lunar Return Chart VI

Hi people, it's been a while since the last time I posted. I thought of doing another LRC Observations since it has been the end of one of mine, and this is still a thing in astro that doesn't get enough recognition. So here we are! Hoping you'll like it.

All pictures were found on Pinterest

Other posts you could like:

જ⁀➴ Lunar Return Chart III

જ⁀➴ Lunar Return Chart IV

જ⁀➴ Lunar Return Chart V

READINGS BOOKING OPEN

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₊˚⊹♡ Mercury 12H will make you be terrible at communicating this month.

₊˚⊹♡ Sun 11H is a big indicator to spend a lot of times with friends, but also to spend a lot of time online.

₊˚⊹♡ 12H Ruler conjunct DSC means you'll probably dream of your FS or love one.

₊˚⊹♡ If the 12H Ruler conjunct DSC also conjuncts Moon it means you'll have vivid dreams about your FS or love one.

₊˚⊹♡ Jupiter conjunct Moon 6H can mean you'll be in a good mood mostly this month, you'll feel probably optimistic.

₊˚⊹♡ Mars 7H is a sign you'll be mad at your partner this month. There could be a lot of anger.

₊˚⊹♡ Mars conjunct Groom is very similar, you could be mad at your FS, if you met them already.

₊˚⊹♡ Mars 7H is usually also a sign you'll want to rush things with someone this month.

₊˚⊹♡ Jupiter 7H or conjunct DSC usually means you'll be feeling content about your romance life this month, or you'll feel very in love with your partner. If not one one those, then you'll probably feel like you are popular when it comes to romance. Or just content with your situation. Moreover this could alsoooo be a sign of meeting a potential partner.

₊˚⊹♡ Venus 9H is a sign of taking interest in a new thing that is more creative.

Example: the month I had this placement I took interest in a lot of creative tools such as crochet & embroidery.

₊˚⊹♡ Uranus 5H could mean you could discover new hobbies this month, but this could be quite sudden, or you could felt like you may have manifested it. It could also be a sign of playing more video games this month.

Example: the month I had this placement I discovered a lot of video games in thrift shops that I used to play as a child. I kept thinking about how bad I wish I could play that again, and a few days later, find those in a shop for literally nothing. Happened 3 times the month I had this!

╰┈➤ Get your own Lunar Return Chart, from 15€ to 50€ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

₊˚⊹♡ 5H Ruler in 9H can be a sign of going on vacations in foreign lands, yet it could also means discovering new hobbies, and hobbies that someone older than you could also share with you.

₊˚⊹♡ 7H Ruler in 8H means you'll discover things about your lover, partner, or person you are interested in.

₊˚⊹♡ Sun 8H means you could be better at manifesting this month, you could also find out things in general this month. Even without searching for it. You could also have a bigger intuition this month.

₊˚⊹♡ 10H Ruler in 9H can mean you'll take a break from work or public attention this month.

₊˚⊹♡ Jupiter 6H is a sign you'll feel less tired this month, but you could also just work well this month, or have a lot of opportunities, clients, etc.

₊˚⊹♡ Moon 6H is a sign you could feel a little more emotional this month, and you could also want to work on it, or you could just feel emotional, nostalgic, everyday. But if it has good aspects then it will just be you being sensitive.

₊˚⊹♡ Moon 10H means you'll be very into your career, job in general. You'll feel the need to put yourself more into it. Though it means you could also be highly into finding a good job.

₊˚⊹♡ Moon conjunct Chiron is a usual placement that explains stress and anxiety, and the house will be the reason for that anxiety.

₊˚⊹♡ Moon conjunct Chiron 10H means you'll feel stressed and anxious about your career. It could be about your current job or if you are searching for one you could be stressed about that.

₊˚⊹♡ 10H Ruler conjunct Jupiter could be a sign of getting a job opportunity. But if Uranus is also there, then it could be very sudden.

₊˚⊹♡ 10H and 6H Rulers conjunct each other is another sign of having a job.

Thank you for reading!

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[reneesghostinthelivingroom]

clarisse x gn!child of nemesis!reader where the reader keeps a black book of everyone who's pissed them off and why and clarisse gets curious. love your work! :)

The Journal

|| Clarisse La Rue x genderneutral!nemesis!reader

|| Warnings; swearing, Clarisse and reader have a small argument, Clarisse invading reader's privacy, short drabble

|| Summary; when Clarisse comes looking for reader at their cabin, what she didn't expect to find was a black leather journal coated in red scribbles. Curiosity gets the better of her.

Requests open!

Started; october 9th

Finished; october 9th

~~~

Clarisse and you have been dating for some time now. The two of you were a pretty intense combo, beyond loyal to each other but almost always fighting about something. Most of the time it's just for fun, though. None of your arguments are really serious. You just like keeping each other on your toes. With you being a child of nemesis and Clarisse a daughter of Ares, it's no wonder things were intense. Both of you had such intense Godly parents.

Despite all that, today was a rather calm afternoon. Clarisse had just come into the Nemesis Cabin to look for you when instead she found a black leather journal on your bed. Scrawled on the front in red was a bunch of crossing lines and scribbles which peaked her curiosity.

She walked over and picked it up, right away she noticed that there was just something intense about the book before she even opened it. When she did open it, she immediately realized why that was. Her eyes widening slightly as she reads through the text. The book was full of names of people who had clearly pissed you off, you even stated why. Most having a massive paragraph or two. The more she looked through, the more she noticed that some names were even repeated. An example being Drew, the daughter of Aphrodite. She was in there more than three times. Damn, you and her really didn't get along.

Clarisse sat herself down on the edge of your bed, looking through the book. At one point she even found her own name, though the reason you had was fair enough. It was after one your more intense arguments with her. She couldn't necessarily fault you for that.

The daughter of Ares took her sweet time reading through it, enjoying everything about it and making mental notes of those who'd wronged you. She knew you had probably already gotten back at most of them by now, but she was still going to do some stuff herself. She was your girlfriend, after all. Plus, she needed to start some fights anyways. She was getting bored.

She found herself wondering if you'd always kept books like this and if you had anymore laying around. This one specifically only went back a few months, so it was relatively new but there were still lots of pages filled regardless. You seemed to have a lot of enemies, which she thought was kinda cool. You definitely weren't afraid to speak your mind.

"Clarisse?"

The sound of your voice got her attention, her head snapping away from the book to look at you with wide eyes. Then glance at the book in her hands before looking to you again.

"Y/N..." She muttered and cursed, setting the book aside," hey."

You folded your arms across her chest as you stood in the cabin doorway," 'hey'? Really? Were you going through my shit?"

She immediately shook her head, trying to defend herself from what you just saw." No, I swear I was just coming in to find you then saw the book laying there so I got curious."

You rolled your eyes and walked over, picking the book up." How much did you read?"

"Enough to know that a lot of people pissed you off, including me." Clarisse admitted, you were the one person she could never bring herself to lie to," ...could I help plan your revenge?" She asked, hoping that maybe if she showed interest you would forgive her.

And you did think about it. For a long moment. You knew you couldn't stay mad at her forever, no matter how badly you wanted to some days." Fine..."

"Fuck yes." She couldn't help but grin. This would be fun.

[manicpixiedreamedwins]

Some thoughts on Edwin tonight:

I’ve talked about how I think Edwin is so interesting because he goes against the grain of the very reserved and stiff Edwardian archetype, but something else I find interesting about him is he lets people know exactly where they stand with him. Here are some examples:

Niko:

This one is highly quoted. Admittedly, Edwin does not say this right to Niko because Niko could not see him at this point. To Edwin's knowledge she was not going to be able to see him. She is alive, and perhaps he did not anticipate the sprites a near death experience. All that being said, this was as close as he could get to expressing fondness to her at the moment.

Charles:

Edwin actually does a great job making sure Charles knows when he is doing well on cases, like when he praises Charles' quick thinking with the sprite jar. Even when Charles isn't present, Edwin identifies them as "best friends, if you must know". But of course, Charles is rattled after the Dead Dragon case for a lot of reasons. So Edwin reassures him that he is, in fact, the best person he knows (even after he has met many new faces).

Crystal:

Although they got off to a rocky start, Edwin lets Crystal know (tentatively perhaps, but earnestly still) that he does value having her around. He pushes back against the assertion that he did not want her on the case to find Monty's friend "Gladys" because he did- and he ultimately believes in Crystal and has built a relationship with her.

Monty:

This scene is really interesting to me because we tend to think of Charles as someone who fawns more out of these two (and Charles does-he'll be the first to put his feelings aside to try and smooth the group dynamic time and time again). But here we see that Edwin also has some capacity to fawn, especially with people he considers friends. He continues to try and smooth things over with Monty well into the evening.

Until Monty was revealed to be a crow, Edwin was still working on smoothing things over. Edwin tried to reassure him they were friends, even if his feelings were for Charles. He did seem a bit (or a lot) disappointed by being misled about the whole witch-familiar thing.

The Cat King:

I don’t think we talk nearly enough about this moment :

Their bond is a bracelet. Ultimately, Edwin probably would have left TCK behind in the cannery if not for the caging spell. Some often forget Edwin would not have entertained all of the harassment, taunting, and interruptions to his casework if he hadn’t been trapped in a caging spell- a spell which trapped him in Port Townsend, allowed him to be located by The Lost and Found Department, and ultimately led to him being sent back to Hell. As an aside, that trip back to Hell was the only reason the bracelet fell off- it was never removed intentionally. The Cat King even had his own final cat count wrong- whether by accident or on purpose is debatable (however, TCK did threaten to “stop playing nice” in this forest scene, so it is debatable if he ever would have given Edwin a clear answer).

Charles (again):

When Edwin realizes his feelings for Charles, he attempts a confession before he is sent to Hell- but is sadly interrupted by the giant spider made of babydoll heads. His second attempt on the stairway is much clearer.

Edwin makes it abundantly clear that his feelings for Charles are romantic- and he needs him to know, for better or worse. It's brave to lay a heart bare like that (and admittedly, Charles does his best to meet him where he can, while they are being chased by an eldritch horror).

In short, Edwin is someone who actually knows how he feels about the people in his life and articulates that more clearly than many give him credit for.

[bangchansgirlsblog]

i was wondering if we could have an argument or really angsty fanfic kind of i nEED to be hurt lolll

Keeping up with the Bhangs

Not the angstiest them all but yeah.

Warning: Angst, fighting, broken arm

Summary: Chan is a billionaire who can’t seem to stop demanding so much from his wife.

Pairing: Chan x reader.

**

"Chan I'm so mad at you," she exclaimed as she walked out their bathroom. It was as big as 4 bathrooms combined but better and more expensive.

She made her way into their walk in closet where Chan continued to put on his tie obviously not bothered by Y/n's rant.

"Baby, can we not do this right now? I have work right now," he put on his shoes and grabbed the jacket that Y/n had neatly ironed for him.

This annoyed her so much because why was he being so dismissive about the situation. He had always listened to her.

"But Chan, you can't just expect me to drop everything I have to come with you later," she crossed her arms together and glared at him as he walked up and down their room now trying to get everything together for the day.

Yes, even tho he was the CEO of one of the biggest companies in the world he still chose to be in time for work so he could be able to set an example.

"Christopher? Are you even listening to me?"

The tension in the room was high.

"I'm not Y/n!" He snapped turning to look at her, "I have work, I have meeting, I have things to do! You having to put on a pretty dress and smiling for one of the biggest events of the year shouldn't have to make me hustle like this. So please," he rubbed his temples and grabbed his phone from the table stand.

His phone was blowing up. Probably all calls from the office or his assistant. God, his assistant. The thought of her made Y/n skin crawl. Anger was  slowly fueling her outburst.

"Chan you know Joon-Ho has soccer all day and you already told me to go to it without you. Then Ji has a play. You want me to drive back home get dressed for a night out?"

The kids were downstairs watching tv while getting ready for their day. Their usual routine set by Y/n who chose to be THAT kind on mum. You know? The pretty, laid back, almond mum? It was working great for the kids.

"God! Why do you have to be so difficult. Fine. I'll just go with my assistant," he didn’t mean it but he was so angry he couldn’t hold back. He knew how much Y/n hated his assistant. How much she got jealous whenever she was around.

She frowns and the anger she initially felt, slowly melted. She couldn’t speak. She was hurt by his words.

"Chan that's not what I mean-"

"Then what? What do you possibly want from me?" He growled, "this conversation is over."

He grabbed his laptop bag and left her to stand there alone. The rising sun sending sun rays through their big windows. Her body slowly shock as each sob left her mouth.

This wasn't there first argument. They had argued the night before about the same thing but this time Chan was really laying it on her.

Chan always tried to understand her. He always listened but recently the more his business became successful the more rough and snappy he became and it wasn't helping her at all because having 3 children and one on the way was heavy.

Yes they had nanny's, yes they had drivers, yes they had maids but she didn't like to bother them. She liked doing things by herself because at the end of the they were her kids. She didn't know what evil intentions these workers had against her or her babies.

**

"Mama!" The voice of her littlest rung through her ear. Her scream making her body completely go numb.

"Soo-min? Babygirl? What happened?!" She gasped finding the little one on the ground holding her wrist.

"Mama!" She cried and jumped into her arms seeking comfort from Y/n.

"Soo-min, you have to tell mama what's wrong," Y/n panicked. How could she be so blind. She turned her back for one second.

"Mama it hurts!" She screamed once again in agony as she still held onto her wrist. Y/n's heart skipping so many beats.

It was only 10 minutes till end of the game. Why did this have to happen to her? Her brain was trying to process the situation. Trying to figure out what to do. The nanny was quick to be by her side trying to help in any possible way.

"Let mama see princess," she begged her little one, "did you fall down?" She questioned the crying girl.

"Mummy, can I go with the girls before the the play?" Ji-Yeon, their middle child, asked her.

"Not right now Ji, your sister’s hand is hurt-" she was shitting it down but a tantrum began. She couldn’t handle everything that was going on at once.

"But mum! You never let me go play! I wish daddy was here instead of you!" This stung. This hurt Y/n. This made her feel like the worst person in the world. Her husband hated her, she couldn't take care of her kids and they hated her. Her mental breakdown was slowly building up.

"Can you behave right now? I can't deal with you bratty attitude right now,"

"I hate you!" She barked back.

"Ji-Yeon. Do not try to tempt me right now or so help me God. Go sit over there and keep quiet or you're grounded."

Although she was in the middle of a tantrum the girl was scared, so scared she got up and made her way to the table where she continued to sulk.

"Soo-min, let mama see okay?" The little girl handed her mum the little hand. Her hand was so tiny that Chan loved to call it a baby paw because of the shape in made when it was in a fist.

Her wrist didn't look okay, it looked broken and that only made Y/n's anxiety grow larger but she kept her cool and continued to carry the little one to the nanny.

"Take her to the car right now, I'll get the rest of the kids. I think she broke her wrist. Please inform Chan to meet us at the hospital," the nanny agreed and slowly carried the crying girl.

Y/n rushed over to the coach and teacher to apologize for her abrupt leave. She explained to them the situation and told them that their other driver and nanny would be there to pick up her oldest son. She made sure security was with him before kissing him goodbye as he continued to play on with his game.

**

It was 6:30 when Chan run through the door. He was panicking and his tie was loosened around his neck.

"Is she okay? What happened?" His breathing was quick but his body relaxed once he saw his wife.

"How could you let this happen Y/n?" He barked at her.

"I was just trying to collect everything so-"

"She's a kid! A 4 year old. You guys should be paying close attention to her. Where's the nanny? Tell her she's fired, I can't believe you right now,"

"Are you fucking kidding me right now? Who takes care of the kids on a daily? Me! Who goes for all their shows and their sports events? Me! Who's there to pick up the pieces whenever you leave home? Me! So don't you dare come in here and say it's my fault Chan," hot tears poured from her eyes and she glared at him. He was taken back. Everyone in the room was.

“I’m not saying it’s your fault…” he looked at the floor. Regret was eating him alive.

"I want a divorce Chan." Chan didn't allow her to even get the chance to walk away before he grabbed her hand and dragged her to the private hospital lounge. He wasn't going to have this conversation out there where nurses and doctors were watching.

Just like the kpop world worked, the Korean business world worked the same. Dispatch and everyone was ready for the biggest millionaires to crash and fall. Everyone was waiting for the latest scandal or drama and this was not going to look good for him.

"What do you mean you want a divorce?" He asked in disbelief. Her brain felt foggy and she felt exhausted.

"Chan, we're always fighting. You treat me like shit. You barely listen to me. You think I'm some baby making machine. All you care about is our image!" She exclaimed gasping for air, "I wish you never became rich, I want the old you back,"

His hands wrapped around her instantly. No hesitation. Her scent filled his nostrils and his body automatically relaxed. De ja vu was hitting him hard.

"I'm sorry," was all he could say. "Let me fix this, please my love?"

"C-Chan I can't. I can't do this anymore," she cried harder. A panic attack slowly passing by.

"Shhh, hey? Look at me. We're okay. I will fix this. I love you so much." He whispered while leaving kisses on her forehead.

"Can we finish up from the hospital and talk at home? Please my love,"

"Fine," she sighed, "but I'll go use the bathroom to wash up."

So she did, she washed her face and made her way to their daughters room where she found Chan goofing around with Soo-min. The poor little girl was so intrigued by her father that she forgot all about the bandaid they were wrapping her up with.

"Mum, are we still going to my play?" She asked softly. Y/n had totally forgot. How could she forget?

"Yes my love, let me talk to your dad really quickly, go get your bag," she giggled and quickly grabbed her bag, "can we stop by Yoona's house mama?"

"Yes princess, we can but only if you behave," the little girl smiled and quickly sat in the chair waiting for her mum to finish having a conversation with her dad.

"Chan, I have to take Ji-Yeon for her play, I totally forgot. Can you finish up here? I'll meet you at the house in like 2 hours,"

"Yeah sure, are you sure you wanna go for the play? You don't look too good love, I can go instead..."

"'No, I've got it. Once your finished up here, I called the chef to cook her some soup. Just feed it to her and then put her to sleep," she instructed Chan, "also make sure when you warm her bottle it's room temperature, she doesn't like it too hot or too cold. Also when you put her in bed you have to cuddle her Chan only for 5 minutes and she'll be out like a light."

Chan admired her as she wrote down the instructions down on the paper. Watching her be so controlling and being such a good mother was low key turning him on.

"Babe, we will be okay. I've done this before-"

"Yeah like 3 years ago before you became mr boss man," she teased her and quickly gave Soo-min a kiss on the cheek.

"Mummy loves you princess, I'll see you in a bit," the little girl waved at her mum and continued to admire the pink plaster that wrapped around her hand.

[eternalfics]

*holds hands out like a little peasant boy* do you have any crumbs.. perhaps, saiki kusuo as a bf with a reader who can sing? perchance...

saiki with a reader that can sing!

a/n: hmm, perhaps I maybe have some leftovers.. and uhh rlly sorry if u have been waiting 4EVERR 😱 (or maybe I just don’t pay attention to my notifications and it’s been a day.) but still sorryyy

warning: a lil joke about blackmail..

the song I was listening to while writing this:

you’re basically just in the friend group, whenever the group goes somewhere you follow. but you and saiki have the most in common, you guys are like bread and butter. you have so much in common, that’s probably why saiki asked you to date him. like you both are quiet, you both like quiet. anything do to with quiet. 😊 of course you still have conversations, but everyone calls you “the definition of shy”.

so saiki doesn’t expect for you to sing at karaoke night when everyone goes, he just thinks you’ll sit and chat with him. but something told him that you weren’t really interested in talking about coffee jelly right now. as you were looking at kaido singing TERRIBLY, you were kind of thinking of pushing him off and singing the rest.

and you did! well, you didn’t push him off. you obviously waited for your turn 😭 and you obviously SLAYED. your confidence rose up so fast, and you shocked everyone around you. you swear you were about to burst out laughing as soon as you saw saiki’s surprised look. but another part of you was so proud of yourself! it was basically saiki saying oh wow, but without words and using his facial expression. (I REFUSE to watch s2 without it being dubbed.) and guess what! you saw a glimpse of teruhashi’s angry face, looking like she was about to tear you up like a dog in the corner of your eye.

and basically since that day, you’ve been singing everywhere WITH ✨CONFIDENCE✨. you sang in your Pom, near saiki, near your friends, at night (quietly bc people are sleeping 😒) , when your favourite song is on, you know it. and everyone got used to it, that shy, uncomfortable y/n you knew was gone 4ever. now, they got replaced a new, confident y/n ✨

saiki, as your boyfriend, had to hear it all the time. and he wasn’t sick of it AT ALL. (sometimes he was, when he was trying to sleep with you on call or when you were singing just. too. much! but that didn’t happen often.) and sometimes, he’s just a big softie. 🙂 saiki asked you one time (in a very flustered way) if you could sing a lullaby for him to sleep, and of course you did it! (right after you teased him and pinched his cheeks.!) now in random moments, you remind him of the moment and you have a very red-faced kusuo saiki at your side. (sometimes you use that information for blackmail-)

whenever you get into arguments, saiki doesn’t like it at all, because he’s used to hearing your voice all of the time. 🕰️ and whenever you’re angry you don’t sing AT ALL. like AT ALL. and saiki has to find ways to make you feel better, he reads your mind, he’s follows you around like a lost puppy, and he tries to signal that he’s sorry but he doesn’t say it, like for example: giving you his LAST, EXCLUSIVEEEE 😱😱 coffee jelly 😓. but you always forgive him in the end, and then he can have that sweet voice near his ears again.

one time, you were at his house and you were coming downstairs secretly. saiki had that ring of his on, you never knew that saiki wore rings? but you always thought that it suited him. but as you get closer, you hear some humming, sweet, unexpected humming. he was humming that song you always sing. 🎶 when you start humming along with him, he jumps and looks behind him, seeing you, he visibly relaxes. seeing him relax, made you giggle. but you guys both knew that you were gonna tease him later.

damn I wrote a lot

[chrysalis-the-butterfly]

What I Mean When I Say, "I Ship Huskerdust"

When I say, "I ship Huskerdust," I don't mean that I think it would be a perfect example of a healthy relationship. Because it wouldn't be.

They've both got issues that they would need to work through if they wanted their relationship to succeed.

On Angel's side, there's the fact that his prior interactions with Husk basically consisted of him flirting with Husk, and Husk making it clear that he wasn't interested, and Angel ignoring that and doing it again. That's harassment.

Yes, Angel stops doing it after Episode 4, but he never explicitly apologises for it. That was a missed opportunity, in my opinion. It was a change for the show to say loudly and clearly, "Hey, trauma sucks, we get that, but it's not an excuse to treat people badly yourself. You grow by owning up to your mistakes and trying to be better than the person who hurt you."

Speaking of trauma...

Angel is being abused by Valentino and exploited in the porn industry. That's not a personal failing. It's not Angel's fault. But it has affected him deeply, and it's something that he and Husk would need to work through.

It's not going to be all sunshine and rainbows. Angel will cry, Angel will get angry, Angel will lash out. He will behave inappropriately, and he will keep being hypersexual because he knows how to do it and sometimes it feels like the safest option. And he will have no idea how to just rest with a loved one and trust them. So Husk will need to be the bigger person and take all the ups and downs and keep loving Angel through the dark days.

But I don't know if Husk has what it takes to do that.

That leads me nicely onto the issues on Husk's side. For starters, there's his judgemental attitude. He's a gambler, and therefore believes he can read people and know everything about them. Angel's "It's not an act!" outburst shakes Husk and makes him realise that he didn't really know what was going on.

But even after that, Husk is still judging Angel. It happens in Episode 6, when Angel is offered drugs by Cherri Bomb and Husk says, "Look, you wanna fuck up all your progress, be my guest. I just ... I just thought you were better than that."

Addicts can relapse if they go back to their old environments and old relationships. It happens. And it's probably not a good idea to be so condemnatory about it.

Can you imagine what Husk's reaction would be if Angel really did relapse? Would Angel feel safe opening up to Husk again if he knew how badly Husk could take it?

Sometimes, it seems as though Husk puts Angel on a pedestal. In Episode 8, when he tells Angel, "I guess you have changed," Angel doesn't look convinced, instead changing the subject. Husk sees Angel as better than Angel thinks he is.

And that goes hand-in-hand with when he was judging Angel more harshly in earlier episodes. Husk applies higher standards to Angel.

I think part of the reason why Husk is so hard on Angel is because Husk sees something in Angel that he doesn't see in himself - youth and potential. Husk has made it clear that he isn't trying to get into Heaven. He probably doesn't think he deserves it. That's why he told Angel not to look for answers to problems at the bottom of a bottle, but continued to drink himself.

My theory is that Husk is working on Angel because he finds it easier than working on himself.

It's much easier to judge and boss around others than to acknowledge and rectify your own flaws. To borrow a metaphor from Jesus Christ himself, Husk is trying to take specks of sawdust out of Angel's eye while he's still got plenty of planks in his own eye.

One of those planks being his complicity in the Overlord system.

Yes, I should probably mention that Husk used to be an Overlord. He used to participate in the very system that is now trapping and torturing Angel.

And he gambled with the souls that he owned! He put their afterlives at stake! Can you imagine being owned by Husk, thinking you knew where you stood, and then waking up one day to be told that you were now owned by someone else? Potentially someone as bad as Valentino?

(Now, I don't think Husk ever actually played a game with Valentino, given that he can't seem to remember Val's name in Episode 6, but still, the implications are horrifying.)

Angel didn't have too big a reaction when Husk opened up about his past. But that's probably because he was still reeling a bit from his own outburst. Once it had sunk in, how did he feel?

How can Angel feel safe and loved around someone who used to own souls and gamble with them carelessly? Someone who apparently still has his Overlord powers? Someone who could turn into yet another Valentino in the wrong circumstances?

How can a romance work?

Can a romance work?

Despite all of that?!

No, when I say, "I ship Huskerdust," I don't mean, "I think they're fluffy and adorable and 100% unproblematic." I mean, "Huskerdust contains interesting dynamics that are fun to explore." There's something about their interactions that I enjoy.

And Huskerdust could be a good way for the cartoon to dive into its themes of redemption and second changes.

Husk could change Angel for the better. We can see that, after Episode 4, Angel is willing to be more honest about what he's going through. He actually tells Niffty about the gruelling 16-hour shift Valentino put him through, instead of trying to pretend he's been all right.

If they became an official couple, Husk could show Angel what it's like to have someone genuinely care for him and his wellbeing, not just use him for money-making or self-gratification. Since Husk isn't interested in Angel's hypersexual porn star persona, it would be a chance for Angel to take the time to figure out who he (Anthony?) really is.

Angel could change Husk for the better, too. Other Tumblr bloggers have pointed out that Husk seemed to be drinking a little less after Episode 4. Perhaps watching Angel attempting self-improvement encouraged Husk to give it a go as well, albeit in a more low-key way.

And if Husk was the one who got Angel out of his contract with Valentino, that would be a great culmination of his character arc. It would be his own personal redemption for participating in the cruel Overlord system, because he'd be freeing someone from an Overlord's control. He'd be correcting his past mistakes. I for one would love to see that in a future season.

That is what I mean when I say "I ship Huskerdust."

TL;DR Angel and Husk are not perfect people, not by a long shot - but they could be perfect for each other.

[kick-a-long]

i find it so desperately sad that goyim generally would be so much less antisemitic if jews started physically fighting back with guns or sticks in every country. calling for the murder of muslims all over the world, if the jewish population was big enough to have large scary groups of crazy fringe fundamentalist synagogues all over the world, a billion strong, that preached murder and hate so goyim could look down on jews like some noble savage in need of assistance and western education and protection. so we could be reformed in obvious patronizing ways because there were so many of us that we had militant violent fringe extremists, like christians and muslims have, mixed in with the normal jews.

if jews didn't have such a reputation for success and intelligence maybe conspiracy theories would stop blaming us for controlling the world. if we felt less in danger maybe we wouldn't be so obsessed with long term survival.

is antisemitism some warped form of envy? maybe. what sucks is that jews are no better or worse than anyone else. some jews are brutes and some are the most wonderful people imaginable, just like any other group. what sucks is we don't all live up to the reputation of tactical geniuses and wizards with mind control magic. all of us jews are just tired and abused humans who have lived with 2000+ years of generational trauma and the endless fall out from a popular jewish book written 3000+ years ago describing the best practices of jewish culture. It has some great stories, histories, life advice, diet recommendations, hygiene, and rules about how to treat others.

is that such a crime?

trying to show a path forward? not demanding anyone else follow those rules but wanting to do our best to follow them anyway? how to live a good life that makes the world better and makes you proud to have been on earth for the time you were there? jews fail to do this all the time, just like everyone else. I fail all the time. why are people so obsessed with that? people say shylock is a stereotyped antisemitic character but,

"I am a Jew. Hath not a Jew eyes? Hath not a Jew hands, organs, dimensions, senses, affections, passions? Fed with the same food, hurt with the same weapons, subject to the same diseases, healed by the same means, warmed and cooled by the same winter and summer as a Christian is? If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge? If we are like you in the rest, we will resemble you in that. If a Jew wrong a Christian, what is his humility? Revenge. If a Christian wrong a Jew, what should his sufferance be by Christian example? Why, revenge! The villainy you teach me I will execute, and it shall go hard but I will better the instruction."

so why do jews always have to be the better man? why do we have to apologize for being angry and sad and hating the people that attack us? that was written by Shakespeare, a christian in the 1600s who who had probably never met a jew, they were expelled from england, but imagined us as money lenders, the only profession left to jews at that time. even he saw the double standard. it makes a good point.

now, i don't want vengeance, i don't want violence, but i feel vengeful. i feel angry that i am unsafe because of play actors and terrorist supporters who want revenge for jews existing but scream bloody murder when jews refuse to dig their own graves, beg forgiveness for ever being born, and lay down in them to be mocked and pissed on and abused in the worst ways imaginable for the entertainment and conquest of it. i want peace with them. they are as human as i am, full of foibles and anger. i want nothing to do with them. i want them to never come near a jew again for the rest of time.

i am sad. all i want is to feel my feelings and advocate for what is the most ethical and practical work around to a world filled with unending suffering while i am still alive. i want them on thier side to live in the world they want and me on my side to live in the world i want. why don't these children of all ages, lost in delusions of fantastical battles and ultimate good and evil, see that? why can't I be a human first as well as a jew first? why do they ask me to pick? why am i not allowed to pick?

it's been almost a year. we're all so tired.

I'm going to a music festival. I'm trying to decide whether to wear a star. why is it dangerous to wear a star around my neck?