#after Valerie does some therapy

[phantomphangphucker]

Phic Phight - Reassembly Required

For: @berry-berry-blu @faeriekit @dykesville @idiot-cheesehead-archenemy ghxstkids @nat-space-obsessed @fan-dot Cake @carelisswriting @redactedgoose @jessaverant

For ghosts organs are optional, bones are optional, skin is optional, limbs are optional, heads are optional. Meaning that: head, shoulders, knees, and toes; all these pieces certainly must go!

Valerie just really hates jigsaw puzzles now.

Okay, Valerie is dealing with some shit right now. Not the normal kind of shit either… well it was still ghost related just not in the way it normally was. Decidedly not. And she’s not entirely sure what to do about that fact alone. Another fact she’s not sure what to do about is the fact that she is currently helping, yes helping, a ghost. Actually helping, not just being battle buddies. Sure it’s Phantom she’s helping and he or it or whatever was… okay… okay-ish. But he’s also why she even does everything.

Good-ish behaviour or not Phantom’s still a ghostly menace.

And here she is.

Helping he/it.

She’d question why but well, it would be pretty messed up of her to not help someone/something, anyone/anything, who had somehow survived -if being still dead but not gone counted as surviving- being fucking dismembered (who does that to someone?!?!?!?) and having its/their parts ‘conveniently’ wrapped/stored into a bunch of garbage bags.

She hadn’t even realized it was Phantom in there. But vaguely squirming black bags plus suspicious looking men -who were not in white suits- was a damn good cause for concern, and for theft of said vaguely squirming bags.

On that note, did you know that apparently disconnected ghostly body parts just squirmed and wiggled on their own? And were more gooey messy stuff than solid matter? Yeah no, probably not. She definitely hadn’t and would have like to have kept it that way. Instead she had committed vehicular break and enter, with maybe a side of arson, all to wind up finding out that fact when she opened the bag.

She expect kittens, or puppies, or something equally horrible. Horrible but both less horrible and more normal than this. Zone, human babies would have been less startling, much more upsetting though.

You win some you lose some right?

Oh god.

She needs fucking therapy. Especially after this bullshit. Grimacing and having to readjust the repurposed laptop bag strap she’s using to hold down what she thinks is a section of a forearm so she can continue sticking it back on to what she’s absolutely sure is definitely an elbow. She really hates the whole squirming on its own fact.

That… or Phantom is being a dick and is actually conscious and is just messing with her. She’ll end Phantom herself if that’s the case. She doubts it though.

At least she’s got one hand back together, why those whackos decided to remove each segment of finger at each and every joint she will never know. Doesn’t want to know even. Phantom will absolutely tell her though, be he thinks body horror is ‘funny’. Asshole.

Even pretends he ‘forgot’ that that kind of body horror usually kills people to do. With Its stupid, “oh yeah”, line.

Zone why is she doing this for this asshole again? She’s probably going to give herself nightmares, and what’s up with how goddamn gooey everything is? She expected some kind of solid matter, or at least a sturdy internal structure perhaps. But this fucking Jello and jet black semi-solid bone chunks mess might be better, because see, she made a plan -kinda maybe- after she opened up the first bag and was met with a goddamn swear-to-the-zone-and-back toxic green eye staring back at her unseeingly and twitching like people’s eyes do when they’re having chaotic dreams. The fucking whole skull, completely de-skinned because people are CRAZY, and loose teeth really added to the nightmare. All the green made it less nightmarish but oof, she hadn’t been okay with that and still wasn’t. But she has a plan at least.

That plan? Stick all the ‘ends’ together and the ‘bits’ back into or onto whatever they were supposed to be in/on, then all that ecto goo ghosts were apparently actually made of would just, you know, stick back together? Zone she’d seen Phantom just ‘pop’ an arm back on before.

But no. Apparently not. Because now she’s sitting in her room, with a bunch of her-damned and Phantom-damned bags of ghostly body parts attempting to put everything back together with a sewing needle and some thread she scrounged up from her closet. It was a little gross and dusty but surely ghosts can’t get infections from dust, right?

Whatever, Phantom should be thankful she’s doing this for Its sorry ass even if he does get some kind of dust infection.

And fine, maybe, maybe, ghost just being pure ecto, and not having a more proper firm structure like living beings, should have obvious but shes not a damn scientist okay?

“Shit!”, Valarie has to jump up, practically scrambling to catch the now run away hand; abandoning the nearly finished elbow and maybe-half-a-forearm. Having to jump on it to pin it to the ground like a cat after a mouse, “do I have to chase you every time we meet?”, and glares at the hand as she picks it up; it spasms a bit. She hopes that wasn’t some kind of ‘response’. Again, she will end Phantom otherwise.

At least the part she was working on is still secure. Small mercies.

Anyway, where was she? Oh yeah her mild mental crisis about helping Phantom/a ghost that she’s mildly using to distract herself from the fact that’s she sewing together a disturbingly close to human body but like it was made of jello. Phantom could never make things easy on her could it? She’s maybe a little rougher than necessary about ripping open another bag to maybe try and find more arm bits; it’s a serious struggle not to gag. Muttering, “you’re doing the right thing. You’re doing the right thing. You’re doing the right thing”, repeatedly to herself all the while.

Would it be messed up of her to demand a burger after this? Yeah. Probably. But she’s making the spook get her a damn burger anyway because fuck him and his/its unending bullshit.

Besides, what kind of super powerful ghostly maybe-hero gets chopped into bits and tossed into trash bags like something out of a B list gangster film? Her life and his afterlife were in the supernatural genre, zone damnit.

What?

Did Phantom agree to it?

Did It lose a bet with oddly high stakes?

Got caught up in a ghost body part trafficking ring?

Take a nap in a trash compactor that was just missing a lot of teeth?

Grimacing to herself… okay he might actually do something like that, and then finds a genuinely completely intact upper arm. What a blessing.

Ugh.

Well at least all she needs now is the rest of the forearm and she can stick the hand on. Hopefully the arm matches the hand, it might not. Does she really care though? If it still works than no. Phantom can rip Itself apart and slap Itself/himself back together again later, without her involvement, if he’s unimpressed with her workmanship.

She physically sits on the hand, so it can’t escape again, as she gets to work stitching the upper arm onto the elbow. Well she would get to work if the damn elbow would stop flailing and bending rapidly or occasionally liquifying, “would you goddamn stop that, I’m trying to help you here”, sighing as it just seems more erratic and wiggly, “why is this my life. I hate you so much”.

She winds up having to strap the elbow top down with some electrical tape she found in her drawer. It’s old and clearly not going to hold for long so she absolutely speeds through trying to stitch on the upper arm; it’s sloppy as hell and she doesn’t care.

The tape does indeed not hold and she gets smacked in the chin by the exposed upper portion of the arm for all her hard work. Zone she just feels so appreciated right now.

…

Now she’s also struck by the fact that she’s going to have to clean up her room after this, after Phantom is just leaking and flinging Its fucking ectoplasm goddamn everywhere. It’s in her hair, on her hands, covering the floor, there’s arches and splatters across the ceiling, her bedsheets are a hundred percent a lost cause, and now there’s also definitely some on her chin. At least what’s still sluggishly leaking out of the mostly rebuilt arm is just doing it very slowly; so it’s just kind of drooling out of the end and squirming in gooey strings. Rather than getting actually splattered around.

Electing to shove the hand in an old candle jar to stop any potential repeat runaway attempts before going about searching for the rest of the forearm.

It’s not fun. It’s really not fun. Pretty shit actually. Having to go bag by bag -was eight separate bags really necessary?- and push around mounds and globs of disconnected and disjointed ecto-flesh and ecto-organ soup (or maybe just organ-like things, she’s pretty sure ghosts do not have organs of any kind at all) hoping to find the particular bit of ecto-flesh that she’s actually looking for. Since spreading everything topour out on the floor was a bad idea for so many reasons, the hands escape attempt being one. Plus, that tactic didn't work with ikea furniture, it wouldn’t work for people… or ghosts in this case.

…

It was in with the, ugh, head bag. Which was the last one she checked. The one she most wanted it to not be in. Seeing a goddamn SKULL and eyes, unseeing or no, was a couple of notches past more disturbing than she’s honestly all that willing to put up with. Even for the maybe-good maybe-hero that is Phantom.

Frowning at the bit of forearm, “but if this was reversed, he’d do this for me without hesitation”, shaking her head, “ugh. Stupid idiot”.

If he wasn’t a ghost… she probably couldn’t bring herself to hate It at all. That had to be hypocritical of her, right? Plus she definitely wouldn’t piece back together someone she actually hated, Zone, she’d find a water bottle full of old piss and dump it on Vlad’s exposed parts before helping him out; maybe shake the piss filled bags around a little. So maybe she didn’t hate Phantom, he was okay, definitely okay enough to not be left as a collection of Bits & Bites™ mixed in with broth to make Campbells Chunky Soup™.

Scowling at herself and then glaring at the forearm to forearm sticking she’s doing, “Zone damn it Phantom, you’re corrupting me”. Morbid humour can’t be healthy, regardless of Phantom’s love for it. He’d never let her live it down if It knew she had referred to It as a snack food that’s just a bag full of a random collection of other snack foods mixed in with soup. You know. Like how he was currently bags full of a random collection of body parts and liquid ectoplasm.

At least the forearm being actually securely tied down, regardless of the upper arm still flailing and wiggly madly, makes the reattachment go smoothly enough.

Okay. So. The hand…

She chooses to just wrap some of the bedsheet around the hand to keep the fingers from flailing and scratching anything before putting hand stump to forearm stump and getting to work. She is very thankful that all Phantom’s parts are currently doing is random movements and not, like, randomly shooting off ecto-beams or making ecto-ice. She’s not foolish or prideful enough to think she’d actually survive being in an enclosed space with Phantom, with any part of It, randomly sending off attacks in random directions. She’d never realized how much he was holding back when she was young, when she first started, but she sure as shit figured that out after seeing the state he left Vlad’s -ugh- lab in.

It is definitely weird that that makes her feel better about the spook though. It could obliterate her and everyone else yet actively made a point to not hurt anyone intentionally or directly. Still did though, because he was a dumbass and also because she was, admittedly, over aggressive.

Right now though, she thinks it’s his hand and arm that are being ‘over aggressive’. Watching the fully reattached thing smacking itself into the floor with audible thumps. “The downstairs neighbours must hate us”. They did. They complained. A lot. Or they used to, until she bitched to Phantom about it during patrolling down time, after said neighbours had stabbed a broom into their roof to ‘make her quiet down’ so hard it punctured through her floor. Apparently Phantom ‘haunted their asses’ for three days and infected their fish tank with ‘signal signs’, she did not ask for an explanation. You know, that whole thing about gift horses and mouths.

Speaking of mouths, that is the last part Phantom’s getting reattached; for obvious reasons. Zone he could just never shut up; and trying to make him shut up just made the ghost more talkative.

She should do the other arm right? She got one figured out so round two should be assuredly easier… hopefully.

And it actually is. Weird. It’s just in two whole halves, an upper and a lower. Left arm? Maybe? It would make sense because if Phantom was defending Itself -which he damn well should have been- It most likely would have used Its right arm more to do that… meaning more damage would be done to the right arm.

…

If that’s the case she definitely attached the wrong hand. Shaking her head and shrugging, “Oh well. Phantom’s problem”. The only real downside to the more intact chunks is they’ve got a little more power, or energy maybe, to thrash around with. Little less ecto leaking though, an alright trade off really. Plus she still has to deal with another hand, which she is not looking forward to at all. Though wait, if the fixed hand was so turbo fucked then it has to be the right hand, because why would a mangled hand be attached to a less mangled arm?

Snaking her forehead, “I’m a dumbass”, sighing, “I can just check which side has the palm and thumb the right way. Ugh”. Getting up and abandoning the mostly stitched back together arm, which starts bouncing around on the ground gurgling out ectoplasm, to check the hand.

…

It’s the wrong fucking hand. Why is her luck such horseshit? Why is Phantom’s luck such horseshit? Why didn’t she have the brain cell required to actually check before attaching the hand?

Whelp, she ain’t fixing her fuck up now. But maybe she won’t attach the other hand to the obviously wrong arm; Phantom can deal with it.

… Unless she needs to put him back together completely for his sorry ass to wake up. That would be just the cream on top, wouldn’t it. Either way she goes back to finishing the other arms stitch work; which thankfully doesn’t go horribly and doesn’t get her smacked in the chin again. Which fine, might because she was on guard for a repeat offence this time.

Standing up after using her desk leg to sort of pin down the arm, putting her hands on her hips and eyeing the bags, “okay, legs; since I’m making the second hand Phantom’s problem”, grimacing, “and because I am deeply disturbed about what I’m going to have to deal with with the torso, and the head is, frankly, too freaky without shotgunning at least one Redbull™”, frowning more, “and maybe cracking open a Monster™ too, for good measure”. She just mildly hates this entire situation.

…

Scratch that, she aggressively hates this ENTIRE situation. She found feet skin. FEET SKIN. Fucking. Hollowed. Out. Floppy. Feet. Skin.

Who does this shit to someone??????? What the fuck???

Sure. Maybe. Phantom’s ’feet skins’ -Zone fucking Hell why- are more… boot? skins? Its feet outer ectoplasmic shell was just white boots after all, but still DISTURBING. What is she even supposed to do with this? Scowling, “Woe to those men. Dishonour on you, dishonour on your cow. Fuck”.

…

Now she has to go garbage bag digging for probably mushy feet innards. Fun. Exactly how she wanted to spend her afternoon. Groaning and looking back into the bag with the… feet skin and hoping it’s at least in the same damn bag.

Glaring down at the actually intact feet innards sludge, “I am currently thankful you are one of the weird ghosts that actually likes to maintain the illusion of bones, holyshit”. The black feet and toe bones ‘appear’ to be holding together the innard ectoplasm of his feet. It’s weird, vaguely solid-ish and needlessly gooey all at once. But regardless she gets up with that nightmare in hand and grimaces at the feet skins, this was gonna suck.

She now has the ‘fun’ task of stuffing wriggling feet ecto-innard goo and ecto-bones inside of pulsating feet/boot ecto-skin, like she’s putting on a seizing persons decidedly gushy and grippy socks. She has to stitch it on some since it’s not just snapping into being attached and, unlike socks, is not made of body hugging elastic.

The feet go in the candle jar immediately.

Wheezing to herself and shaking herself off some, “that might have been the worst thing I’ve ever done”, and shuddering before resuming looking for legs.

…

She doesn’t find legs. Like, at all. No thighs. No hips. No shins. No calves. No knees. Nada. You know what she does find though? A ghost tail. Yup, a full ghost tail. Which makes zero sense. Picking up and making faces at the surprisingly completely limp -though vibrating randomly- noodle-like thing, “how do or did you have both feet and a tail? What the Zone, Phantom?”. Better yet why couldn’t he have just had the tail? So that she wouldn’t have had to go through the crap she just did?!?!?!?!?!?.

… well at least it’s whole and intact. Fuck her life.

This unfortunately means it’s either torso or head time. Neither of which she wants to deal with. Especially not after that bullshit. What if she puts his goddamn face skin back on and the eyes in and everything and he just starts talking to her??? Yeah nope, not dealing with that. Not a chance. Yes if Phantom did do that It might be able to explain shit that she honestly doesn’t actually want explained but morbid curiosity is a thing, or be able to provide some advice on what the heck she’s doing.

Cause frankly?

She doesn’t know if she’s actually doing any of this shit right. Zone she already maybe put on the wrong damn hand!

She refuses to deal with his bantering though. Big ol’ fat no. An even bigger, fatter, ‘No’ if It banters while Its head is still detached from a torso.

So torso reconstruction it is. Meaning organs. Ugh. And considering she knows what bag the head, it’s skin, and the eyes and teeth, are in; she actually can just dump everything else, at this point her floor can go fuck itself. Anything that wiggles or squirms too much goes back in its plastic confines as punishment.

Valerie drops the tail and turns on the rest of the -head free- bags, dumping them in a messy pile unceremoniously. It’s a mess. It’s disgusting. It’s writhing and dripping and squelching. It’s a lot of things. Mostly it’s a mass of maybe-bones, maybe-organs that are maybe whole, and ecto-flesh; ectoplasm leaking and dripping in and out (somehow) of the squishy jello mound.

Her blinking, “… maybe making a fucking flesh mound wasn’t the best way to go about this, dear zone”. Breathing and massaging her temples, “okay. Okay. Let’s see. Uh”, sighing and dropping her hands, “drag out the outer ecto-flesh, hope it’s entirely intact even though I damn well know it ain’t gonna be. If it’s not intact then, fuck, try? to piece it back together like a very disturbing flesh puzzle”.

Not only is the flesh not intact -big surprise there. Not- but it’s also still connected to random bits of innard ectoplasm. Some is still connect to ecto-bone even. Even worse some of the innard ectoplasm and ecto-bone is also connected to other innard bits; making basically strings and webs of semi-solid mangled nightmare mess. She’s has precisely zero chance of figuring out what everything is and where everything goes.

Shoving everything around on the floor and throwing her hands up, “I give up on making sense of any of this”. So here’s the new plan, stitch the skin back together at random with mild attempts to make things straight-ish and aligned-ish; while giving very little fucks about how nice it looks since it will all probably have to be removed and redone.

By Phantom. Not her.

Who knows maybe he has experience stitching Itself back together from head to toe, he gets hurt enough that it’s possible… she pities him sometimes honestly. Like he’s out there doing the whole sorta heroing thing and getting shit kicked beyond shit kicked for it. Sure so was she but she didn’t get de-limbed vaguely regularly, not to mention this whole mess.

Lifting up a very square section of ecto-flesh, watching the stringing connections to what seems like a rib or half a rib, it warbles and makes a groaning noise. Valerie drops it immediately, whisper muttering, “what the fuck, Hell no”, a couple times. She does swallow and keep working on stitching together different pieces though, she’s not letting freaky ghost shit stop her from doing what she’s decided she’s going to do. Being extra freaky or not.

Unfortunately that is not the last time she encounters random moaning… stuff. She drops every single piece that does it and moves onto a different part every time.

And then the apartment door opens, or sounds like it does at least, making her freeze. Okay, alright, two options. Option one: they’re being robbed. Unlikely but possible, very unfortunate for the robber though because she WILL fuck their shit up while actively covered in gore. Option two: her dad’s home. Technically safer but ho boy, not good. He might be… alright more or less with her chosen profession, at this point. But being okay with your daughter kicking ghostly ass and occasionally getting slightly hurt was entirely different than walking in on your daughter reconstructing what’s practically a goo ghost corpse; a ghost corpse of the well-loved, highly respected, and celebrated town hero. Also her room looks like a fucking nightmare, Zone she probably looks like a fucking nightmare.

There’s the sound of keys being hung up, shoes being dropped on the ground before tucked away, the fridge being opened and closed, the coffee machine starting up, and a loud sigh. Yup. It’s her dad. She is so fucked. The vaguely more person-shaped mound seemingly agrees and moans from some part of Itself; the squelching is louder than the moan yet unfortunately less disturbing.

“You home, Sweetie?”.

Valerie swallows, yes or no? He’ll want to check in on her room either way so maybe if she tells him to, ugh, not come in then he’ll listen. Or he’ll make her at least come out and see him so he can see she’s fine. Normally it was just mildly inconvenient but made her feel warm and happy inside, but right now she’s positively covered in ectoplasm and bits of ghost flesh; if she was injured he wouldn’t be able to freaking see it past the ecto.

Which fine, that might have covered her from his worry more than once but Phantom always noticed because apparently blood had a noticeable smell, a thing she chooses not to think about too much.

Ah fuck it, if he comes in that would be worst case scenario here, “I’m home!”.

Apparently the downstairs neighbour has something to say about that, “I KNOW! I HAD TO PUT DOWN A GODDAMN BUCKET TO CATCH ALL THE GODDAMN ECTOPLASM DRIPPING DOWN FROM YOUR GODDAMN FLOOR! SORT YOUR SHIT!”, followed by a, “please don’t get me haunted again!”.

Okay, she can’t help but chuckle nervously at that. Damn it. But… glancing around and right yeah, all she did to fix that ‘hole’ was throw cardboard over it. Cardboard that is fuck soaked in ectoplasm now. Whoops. She’d apologize but that would just make those folks feel more bold to yell up through the floor.

“Valerie…”. Now her dad sounds unimpressed and concerned, more unimpressed than concerned; good.

Her vaguely attempting to squish around the person-ish mound -she thinks she actually managed to get one shoulder looking actually right, go her- so it looks slightly neater and maybe to get it to stop bubbling? and weakly flinging itself around in sections. “I’m fine, dad. I’m just, ugh, patching up Phantom”, muttering, “stupid ass ghost”, under her breath and very specially at the blob. The arm with a hand picks that moment to free itself from the laptop bag strap and spastically bounce wiggle itself into the ceiling with a wet thwack. Valerie glaring, “thanks Phantom, I definitely needed an entire arm and hand print on my goddamn ceiling”.

“Oh? It’s not too bad is it? Do you need help? Him?”, he sounds closer to the door now; she’s seriously praying he does not come in. Let her, and Phantom honestly, have that little ounce of luck.

Hurriedly responding, “no, no, no, no help necessary. But, it is bad, dad”, wincing, “I think he’ll be fine since he hasn’t started fading or anything”, muttering quietly to herself, “I have no clue how though”. Because really? How was this in any shape, way, or form, survivable to any degree? “You don’t have a protective suit or anything so you definitely should not come in”. Please let him listen to her, please let him listen to her, please let him-

“If you’re sure, I don’t like the sounds of that though and you know it. Once you do have him patched up, I want to see both of you just for my own peace of mind; okay?”.

She knows damn well she can’t get out of this one, but Zone does she wish she could. Plus she doesn’t exactly know how possible that will be for Phantom. Even if she had somehow by some miracle actually managed to put the ghost back together again perfectly, which she clearly didn’t, there’s no way It wouldn’t still be hurt and exhausted and whatever else. He’d probably want to go see that doctor he’s said he/It has; that still baffles her some. Ghosts having fucking doctors. Sighing to herself, “okay. Can’t guarantee Phantom will be super up for a chat though”.

…

“Based on him not making some joke I’m guessing he’s unconscious?”.

Valerie winces, over both the comment and the fully intact arm plus hand practically slapping into the torso flesh mound, “yes?”.

Thankfully her dad sighs, “I’ll be in the living room then. I will check in every hour on the hour though, missy. And I will come in there if I don’t get a response”, and sounds like he’s walking away from the door.

… So looks like future her and future Phantom will have that problem to deal with. After dealing with the current, much more dire and insane, one.

Sighing and frowning, she pries the spasming arm hand out of the torso mound, “stop hitting yourself, you idiot. That’s my job”. She gets the hand arm tied back down onto one of her bed legs, at least the other arm -still sans a hand- was still pinned down by her desk. And the-

Shit.

The feet escaped their candle jar jail, Zone damn it.

Standing up abruptly and looking around, “fuck me, fuck me, fuck me. Where did you go you stupid bastard”. Getting down on her knees to check under the bed, yup there’s a foot, it’s kicking her wall, flopping over, flailing, and spasming up and down like a goddamn game glitch. “Every single part of you is unnecessarily dramatic, Phantom. Now come here you”. Today was going to give her extremely unique nightmares. Like a mob of mildly sentient feet attacking her from beneath her bed. Hooray for probably eventual insomnia induced creativity.

The foot goes back in the jar, her putting a desk weight on top of it for good measure while she hopefully goes to find the other missing foot.

She spends a good twenty minutes almost ripping her room apart, no foot. Okay so either it A) dissolved, a very bad omen. Or B) it’s successfully hidden itself and Phantom will have to find Its own shit. Or, and this is the really shitty option, C) its escaped the apartment entirely and has begun terrorizing the other tenants or random people on the street with its mere existence; meaning she’ll have to hunt down Phantom’s dismembered foot, which is probably leaving a mild trail of ectoplasm drippings and streaks where ever it is.

As it is she’ll have to deep clean even under her entire bed and the damn wall back there now. Ugh, cleaning everything was going to be a nightmare. Groaning into her hands, “if I get It back together then maybe Phantom can be helpful”, groaning again for good measure before moving back over to the torso mound and blink, titling her head, “I think it’s reconstructed itself? Or rearranged itself?”, well either way it was less horrific to look at. Though watching as some of the stringy connections warble and leak out more ectoplasm from somewhere -how much ectoplasm can one damn ghost have?- before shaping? a bit better; yeah this was still distinctly freaky. Making faces, “are you, er, conscious now? Reforming?”. She gets back the clicks, screeches, warbles, whistles, and static that she knows is ghost speak.

b̶̳͔̝̫̜̖̾̎̿̅͂͒̑͂̕͜ͅà̶͉̠̲̇́̿͑̽͒c̷̘̻̤͍͔̖͍̣̿̔͆̕͠k̶̛̬̤̻̗̄͊̊̔͆͊͑̕ ̸̻̂̃̿̍͗̉̏̕o̶̯̲̙̻̰̳͈̠̣̎f̷̢̰̟̹͝f̶̱̫͌̈́͊͋̇́͝.̷̢̣̥̻̹͚̉̿̈́̊͝ ̴̩̟̙̗̌̈H̷͓̪̳͉̻̄u̶̙̬͈͈̔̾͂̐̃̚̕͠ͅr̸̗̓̚t̸̛͍̱̰̰͍̩̏̈́͆͐͛͛͑͝ͅͅ.̷̫̜̭̤̺̖͍́̌̔̋̅͆̚ͅ ̷͎̟̠̖̲͌̋͛̈́͊̒̊́P̵̪͙̰̲͆̾̿̆a̵͍̙̠̼͕̪̪͑͌̏̿̃́̑i̷̺͈̜̯̩̝̓̆̏̐̊̍͜n̵͕̱̠̗͋̀̇̀͝͝.̶̧̢̱͕̦̀̍̋̆͑̆́͠ ̶̧̓̉̎̂͑͘F̴̧͕̙̥̝̭͚̲̓̽̚͠ḯ̵̜̝̊̈́͐̀̀̈́̾͠x̶͇͇͒̈́̉̿̈́͋̂͌.̵̰̀̉̾̓̈́̌͠ͅ ̶̨̥͖̣̱̕Ṣ̷̡͓̗͓̟͈̊̉̓̕ͅt̷̡̪̔͂̌̍̍̀͊̚̚͜ͅạ̸̹̥͕̮̍̓̋̅̐̃̑̔̌y̴͍̭̘̘͒̾ͅ ̴͔͋͗̋̽̂̍ą̴̨̛͚̹̦̜͉̌̓w̴̘̺͓̥̝̩̘̟̓ấ̸̫͕͕̱́̽͒̿͝y̷̙̻͔͚̽.̴̡̀ ̵̖̥̲̦̿̄̎̓͗̾̍͘͠N̶̤̦̝͗̈̒̊̈͗͂͘͘ȍ̸̢̯̤̻̘̥̩͓̒ ̷̜̝̼̗̾̍͜t̸͇͎̩̏̀̀͋o̴̖̓͒̊͗͑ͅǔ̵̘̾͐̿̔̅̇̐̚ͅc̶̡̜̤̼̖̗̲͉̝͂̾ḥ̷͍͉͓̹̗̦̽̊͜ͅ.̷̗̳̝̘̙̦̦̀̊̀̌̀̀ ̴̰̝̣̙͙̟͕́̓̑̀̎Ḙ̷̡̬̗͓̼͚̜̐̃̍̚ͅw̵̥̬̔̂́̕͘

Valerie blinking, glad she’s gotten used to ghosts enough to not instinctually flinch or cover her ears. Not that she can remotely understand what ever was just said or if the mound even actually said actual words and not just random sounds. Phantom would be the type to just make random sounds purely because It could.

Standing up and eyeing the one untouched bag, ugh, “okay if you’re maybe sorting that mess out I guess I have to deal with the… head now”. Maybe she’ll get lucky and he’ll have at least his eyes or skin back where it should be.

Is she that lucky? Of course not! Why would she be?. Closing the bag again and breathing, “yeah okay. Nope”. Walking off to her desk, throwing a glare at the pinned arm before ripping open a drawer and grabbing a RedBull. Promptly stabbing it with a knife, one that isn’t infused with ectoplasm or nano bots or covered in ectoplasm, and shotgunning it; grabbing a Monster right after and cracking it open.

Moving back over to the bag and sitting down, still glaring, putting the Monster to the side and opening the bag up again. It’s still a nightmare but at least it’s a nightmare she’s dealing with while caffeinated now. Officially grabbing out the fucking soft skull and just staring for a beat; there’s squirming squiggly muscles attached to it which is somehow both better and so much worse. It looks like the thing is covered in a mass of writhing green worms and parasites.

“Valerie?”.

Valerie jumps a little, apparently so distracted by Phantoms Zone damned skull that she didn’t hear her dad approach, “I’m still okay and still doing patching up, dad”, eyeing the singular foot in a jar. Naw, it’s better if she doesn’t tell him to search for a dismembered foot; that’ll worry him even more.

“Alright”. It sounds like he’s walking off again.

Shaking herself and looking back to the skull, hopefully this is the only time she’s going to see someone’s skull to any degree. Tilting it and squinting in through an eye socket, the inside of his skull was glowing blue of all things. Is that good? Bad? Related to how Phantom, of all ghosts, wound up dismembered? Sticking a finger in to poke it, which she was actively trying not to think about, and jerking her hand back with a faint hiss; glancing at the ice on her finger. “Alright. Ow. Not doing that again. Point taken, geez”.

Then immediately scrunching up her entire body in a disturbed cringe as the skull vibrates, mouth clicking open and shrieking loudly at her.

She definitely hears her dad rushing over this time, “you okay?”.

Shaking herself off, “yeah, I just pissed Phantom off a little I guess”, cracking her neck and shaking herself off a little more, “dick”.

And then the fucking skull snaps back at her, opening its toothless jaw wide, holy fucking shit. “h̵̙̓ē̶̼ý̸͔ ̷̙͂f̶͎̋u̴͈͊c̴̘̏k̶͎̈́ ̵̳̀y̴̤͂o̶̖̚ủ̸̼ ̷̞̊t̷͎̚o̷̳̊ȍ̵̭ ̷̫̽t̸̮̍h̷̞͂a̵̢̔t̸̫͂ ̴̻̃h̶͙̓ủ̸̼r̸̖̿t̴̪͆.̵̬́ ̸̧̈́W̸̮͋h̵̲̍ǎ̵͉t̴̡̛ ̶̰̽t̶͙͘h̶̬͝ě̷̥ ̷̗̔Ź̶͍ȏ̸̰n̶̮͒ẽ̵̩?̶̺͐”.

She instinctively flings the skull into the ceiling, it falling to the ground, squishing a little, and rolling a bit before she cautiously picks it back up. That… that was vaguely English, she thinks? she understood that. Her dad’s wince is almost audible, “I hope that’s all it was”, before sounding to go back to the living room again.

Then… the skull speaks up again; or Phantom speaks she supposes, “O̷h̶ ̶g̸e̸e̸z̷ ̶w̷h̴y̷ ̴a̴m̸ ̷I̶ ̴a̸ ̸m̷e̵s̴s̵?̷”.

Closer to English, good for him; this is a nightmare. She is having a goddamn conversation with a disembodied skull. “I am deeply disturbed, Phantom”.

Apparently It doesn’t like that response, “W̶h̷y̵ ̵i̸s̸ ̷m̸y̶ ̵h̷a̸n̴d̸ w̶r̴o̶n̴g̵?̸ W̴h̴e̴r̷e̶ ̴t̷h̸e̸ ̶f̴u̷c̶k̷ ̴I̶S̸ ̶m̷y̵ h̵a̵n̵d̸ a̴c̵t̴u̶a̶l̷l̷y̵?̶ W̴h̸y̷ ̵i̵s̸ ̵n̸o̴t̸h̸i̵n̵g̶ at̸t̵a̸c̷h̶e̶d̷?̸ ̴W̸h̷y̸ ̸i̸s̵ ̵m̴y̸ ̸a̵r̶m̵ ̸b̷e̷i̵n̶g̶ ̵s̴t̸a̸b̷b̷e̵d̴ ̷b̴y̵ ̸a̷ ̶f̷u̸c̸k̷i̷n̴g̷ ̶d̴e̸s̷k̴?̵ ̸B̴y̶ ̸t̸h̴e̵ ̵A̶n̴c̷i̷e̷n̷t̸s̷,̵ ̵V̵a̷l̸?̵”. She just stares for a beat, letting Phantom continue, “w̵h̶y̴ ̵d̵o̸e̷s̷ ̴i̷t̸ ̷f̵e̵e̷l̴ ̶l̶i̶k̷e̷ ̸o̶n̷e̴ ̴o̷f̶ ̶m̴y̶ f̸e̸e̷t̴ i̷s̴ ̸b̵e̸i̶n̸g̶ ̴b̵o̸i̴l̸e̵d̸?̵ ̴W̵h̵y̴ ̶d̴o I̷ h̶a̶v̶e̸ ̸f̵o̵u̴r̷ ̶f̵e̷e̴t̸!̵”.

She hopes by ‘four feet’ he means the ghostly tail that’s still laying limp on the floor. “Excuse you, I’ve spent multiple hours stitching you back together like a nightmarish puzzle. Zone I even rescued your sorry ass from the whack jobs carrying you off in garbage bags”. This conversation should be starting with a thank you as far as she’s concerned; she slapped It back together from something that damn well should have ended the ghost.

While the skull stays silent Valerie pulls out the face skin with as few fingers as possible, she might as well have this conversation with a proper damn face and not a freaking skull. Zone. She feels like she’s being judged as she just kind of tugs the skin down over the skull and prods it to move it where it’s more or less supposed to be.

She’s very glad the skin does actually snap or suck back on this time, as if it had never been off to begin with.

…

Phantom’s mouth opens again, the fact that Its still toothless is not a good look, almost as disturbing as being faceless, when combined with the lack of eyes. “D̷i̷d̴ ̷y̸o̴u̶ ̴j̴u̷s̷t̵ ̵p̴u̸l̶l̷ ̵m̷y̵ ̴s̷k̶i̵n̵ ̵b̵a̵c̸k̵ ̸o̷n̷?̵”.

There’s honestly not much she can say to that, “yup”.

“h̴u̶h̵”.

“Yeah”.

“t̷h̶a̵t̸’̷s̶,̴ ̷u̴h̸,̸ ̸p̷r̸e̸t̴t̶y̷ ̷f̵u̴c̸k̴e̸d̴ u̶p̴ ac̶t̵u̵a̵l̵l̵y̴”.

Valerie rolls her eyes, bleeding sarcasm, “you think?”, leaning over to grab an eye with a grimace, she’s got questions about how the actual fuck it’s actively leaking out ectoplasm. It’s completely covering her fingers and dripping down her arm onto the ground. “You’re getting an eye back too”.

“C̴o̸o̶l̶ ̷b̶e̸a̶n̶s̷”.

Valerie gapes a little at him, what the fuck kind of response is that? Here have back your eye that was removed from its eye socket by probable psychos. Oh that’s neat thanks for the solid, man. Stupid stupid Phantom. She basically rams the eye back in without any degree of precision, “screw you!”.

Phantom makes faces as the eye seems to, ugh, resettle. “f̸i̵r̶s̸t̶ ̵y̶o̴u̵ ̴s̵t̸a̴b̸ ̴m̴y̷ ̵c̶o̸r̷e̵,̴ ̵t̴h̷e̴n̶ ̵y̵o̷u̸ ̵s̵t̴a̸b̵ m̷e̶ w̸i̴t̵h̸ ̴m̸y̴ ̶o̸w̴n̸ ̴e̴y̸e̴!̶”.

“You say that like it’s something that regularly happens to people”.

“D̴o̸e̶s̵n̶’̴t̵ ̸i̶t̸”.

Valerie practically growls at the gaul of It, “no! Things that kill people don’t regularly happen to them, you twat!”. Why did Phantom have to be so damn insufferable sometimes. She grabs Its other eye a bit more aggressively than is necessary. “Do you want your other eye back or not”.

It glares at her with Its one attached eye, “N̴o̵t̴ ̴i̴f̷ ̶y̷o̶u̴’̸r̷e̵ ̵g̸o̸i̷n̴g̷ ̷t̵o̸ as̵s̵a̷u̵l̷t̷ /m̴e̵ ̸w̸i̶t̴h̴ ̴i̸t̷ ̷a̴g̶a̷i̷n̴”.

What kind of person or ghost just says ‘naw I’ll pass on having both eyes’??? She absolutely rams the eye in while Phantom shrieks in annoyance at her. Fuck him and fuck his annoyance too.

They just glare at each other for a while before Valerie huffs, scowling, “why am I still holding you, you suck”. Turning and throwing Phantoms head at the torso mound like she’s trying to slam it down.

It makes a loud squishing noise and indents into the torso mound some. Phantom speaking, muffled, “r̵u̶d̵e̶,̶ ̷b̶u̸t̶ ̶a̷c̸c̵e̴p̷t̵a̴b̵l̸e̵”.

She has no idea what he means by that, until the torso mound fucking squirms and starts globulating and reforming grotesquely like something out of a hard core eldritch body horror flick. There’s strings of almost starry gore scrapping against and snapping on to things, definite organs literally slapping into each other, stomach bile? squelching around black ribs in granules before settling, muscle fibre stretching unendingly and almost crushing in bone and ectoplasm. The ghostly tail slithering across the ground like the snake in the garden of eden itself to reattach to the severed lower section of torso, respawning to Its familiar legs; the normalcy of that particular change is more unsettling than it has any right to be.

She is strongly resisting the urge to vomit, it’s a fucking blessing when It’s suit reforms in perfect condition over the torso and neck. Phantoms back arching backwards in a stretch, head and neck craning back then forward then around with loud cracks. It rolls Its shoulders, with nothing attached to them, before looking over Its shoulder back at her, “I̷ ̴a̵m̴ ̵n̷o̴ ̸l̶o̵n̴g̶e̷r̸ ̷b̸o̶d̸i̸l̴e̶s̵s̴”, tilting Its head, “o̸r̸ ̶n̶o̵ ̶l̶o̶n̷g̶e̴r̸ ̶h̵e̵a̴d̸l̵e̷s̴s̷,̶ ̴d̴e̸p̷e̴n̴d̵i̵n̶g̴ ̸o̸n̸ ̴h̴o̶w̸ ̷y̶o̶u̵ ̵l̸o̵o̴k̸ ̵a̶t̷ ̶i̷t̴”.

She almost squeaks at him, “I didn't want to see that at all”. Scratch out everything she said about all the other horrific horror bullshit she’s seen tonight, that was the most nightmarish thing she’s ever seen and she will be having nightmares tonight, Zone she’ll be having them for the next week.

It levels her with a flat glare, “I̴’̴d̴ ̷s̴a̴y̸ ̶s̵o̵r̷r̸y̸ ̵b̸u̷t̸ ̸y̵o̷u̴ ̷p̷u̸n̷c̵h̶e̷d̴ ̴m̶e̴ ̷w̸i̷t̶h̴ ̴m̴y̴ ̶o̸w̸n̵ ̷e̴y̵e̵,̷ ̵t̸w̷i̷c̴e̷”.

She glares back and wheezes in pure disgust. Phantom nodding its head at the strapped down arm with a hand, clearly expecting her to go get it for the ghost. She is having none of that, “get it your damn self, you utter nightmare fuel”. Their glaring match goes on for a bit before she huffs and gets up, unstrapping the hand arm and giving It over by smacking the ghost over the head with it. Phantom managing to bite onto the wrist and muffle growl at her for hitting It; doesn’t stop glaring though, looking from the arm stump to Its shoulder stump then to her.

…

Is it not just going to reattach like the… torso? Fuck her luck, “do you need me to stitch it back on?”.

It nods happily, almost grinning like a damn puppy.

… Guess she’s doing this again, stupid Phantom for being like this. She huffs but does shuffle over to work on stitching the arm, Phantom holding it up with his mouth all the while; at least now it looks like It’s healing is helping the process along now.

Phantom dropping Its wrist out of Its mouth, “n̸i̸c̶e̴”.

Was that almost a thank you or is she hallucinating?

The ghost raises Its eyebrows at Its hand as it opens and closes, flexing, the wrong goddamn way because it’s on the wrong goddamn arm; before just shoving Its hand into Its head.

…There comes a point where disturbing shit just kind of stops being disturbing, you get to point where it’s just ‘ah okay this shit again. Fantastic’ and at least Phantom shoving Its hands into Itself suddenly wasn’t super new behaviour. It keep that thermos in Its stomach half the time for Zones sake. Phantom pulling a blue orb out of the front of Its face is goddamn new though, her watching as It promptly shoves the orb in Its chest.

Then, because apparently It wasn’t done being a pain, the handless arm and jarred foot go intangible, escaping their confines, and zip over to Phantom to reattach. Followed by Phantom biting off Its hand and sort of maneuvering it onto the left arm, right hard reforming from right arm stump out of thin air; the other foot also reforming from nothing.

Valerie blinks, speaking blandly, “well at least I know why I never found the other hand”. At least that means It did actually damage Its dominate hand more. “And what? Too lazy to go get the run away foot?”.

Phantom rolls Its eyes, “har har, I’m not reattached something that’s been basically boiled to a crisp in what I think is some guys stove top pot. Let the have my ecto blood as a broth additive”. She can only nod in acquiescence. Then It gets that stupid soft gentle ‘I care’ look that pulls at her heartstrings, before outright hugging her.

What?

It pats her back gently, “thanks a lot, really. Thanks so much. I’m fine, I’m whole; it’s okay for you to stop shaking now or for you to throw up if you need to-”.

She was shaking? When? How hadn’t she noticed?

“-I can summon you a shock blanket if you don’t have one. Or a soothing tea maybe?”, mumbling more to himself, “I’m sure Nocturne wouldn’t mind me taking some. They’d probably be happy, since they always say both of use are always too stung out and don’t sleep enough”.

She kinda hates that that would probably actually be a good idea, because all of this was all kinds of fucked up and supremely disturbing in every sense of the word; and the energy drinks were coming back to kick her in the ass. Had she even finished the Monster? Probably not. That was a waste right?

Phantom stops hugging her, leaning back but putting his hands on her shoulders, watching her face and tilting his head curiously, “you better? Better enough at least?”.

She fucking throws up right on his lap. Yeah okay, disturbing stomach churning shit, plus apparent mild possible shock, plus nerves about fixing a horrifically injured battle buddy, plus excessive caffeine, was maybe not the best idea she’s ever had. And Phantom be a gentle asshole rather kills her spite fuelled pride.

Her wheezing and whipping her mouth, while Phantom furrows his eyebrows together and purses his lips, “yeah. Yeah that’s- that’s fair. I definitely deserved that”.

“Fuck you”.

Phantom snorts at that but at least stops holding her shoulders. It leaning back on his hands and staring unseeingly at the wall, “I guess you probably want an explanation for the horror show I dump on you”.

Honestly? No. No she does not. That’s reasonable she thinks. Yet a stupid part of her is filled with that stupid morbid curiosity. Also, yeah, she definitely is shaking and she doesn’t know if that’s shock, adrenaline, or caffeine.

…

There’s also a blanket on her shoulders that definitely wasn’t there before. Stupid Phantom. Stupid stupid Phantom. He puts her through a fucking medical nightmare, then a body horror visual metric ton of nightmare, than has the audacity to be nice and kind and gentle. Zone she hates him… that’s a lie obviously but still…

Her swallowing, “the blue orb?”. That was at least something that won’t be horrifying, hopefully.

He grins and his eye light up, clearly happy to not talk about the shit that happened to him which was probably traumatizing, him turning to look back at her, “ah! yeah I guess you would have no clue what a core looks like, huh?”, shrugging loosely, “I’m sure Maddie and Jack have explained them some. Think heart and brain and lungs and bone marrow and everything”, pointingat his chest then to his head, “I moved my to my head to protect it”.

… All she can really think to say to that is, “well at least you protected yourself for a change”.

“Ouch, cut deep why don’tcha?”, and he grins stupidly, laughing a little.

She’s baffled how It can laugh at all after all this bullshit? She somewhat fixed him but everything she ‘fixed’ was things that were done to him. Scowling without any real feeling, “how are you not freaking out”.

His smile wavers a little but he shrugs anyways, “I’ve been through a lot, Val”.

“Don’t call me that”.

It actually winces, “right, sorry”, rubbing Its neck, “though yeah, getting dismembered by a ghost body part trafficking ring was a new, and very unpleasant, one”.

Zone fuck she was joking when she thought up fucking organ trafficing as a why for all this crap. Glaring, “seriously”.

Phantom smirks, “what can I say? It’s an Ancients be damned weird world. It’s tied to some cultural or religious thing, don’t quote me on that, that thinks wearing or consuming ghostly parts and ‘true ghost ectoplasm’ is healing and empowering. Yeah, it’s fucked up”.

Both of them jump at her dad suddenly interrupting on the other side of the door, “still okay in there?”.

Phantom just looks confused while Valerie shakes herself off some, “yeah dad, Phantom just came back around and is, you know, explaining”.

The man’s relieved sigh is extremely audible, “good. Good. Remember what I said though, you and me and Phantom and tea. Okay?”.

She sighs, “yeah, I know”, and starts pulling off the blanket to fold on her lap. Fuck she’s exhausted and doesn’t want to deal with this, but it’s her dad and she doesn’t want him to fret. Meanwhile Phantom is glancing around and eyeballing the ectoplasmic mess straight out of a slasher flick and wincing; eyeing her up and down and again wincing. She knew she looked a mess alright? No need to be a dick about it. Besides, he looked worse. So much worse, holy fuck.

Her dad humming, “good, will you both be out soon?”.

Phantom clears his throat, “yeah sure, I wouldn’t call myself super presentable quite yet though, so give me a beat, yeah?”.

“Of course! No worries, just sooner rather than later. Please”.

Both of the local town heroes wince at that, giving matching, “okay”’s before her dad walks away again. Her eyeing Phantom as he stands up with a bit of a grunt. Her frowning, “are you good?”.

His laugh is a little bitter and hollow, “I’m one part reformed mangled flesh soup and one part enough stitching to make me a patchwork doll. Not a chance in the entire Zone am I ‘okay’”, him kneeing down by some of the ectoplasmic mess, “but I’ll be okay, eventually. And there’s a gnarly mess to clean up and a worried father to placate”.

She blinks at him, confused, “mess to-?”, and cuts herself off at seeing all the ectoplasm splattered and smeared and coagulated around start pulsing and flowing to and seemingly inside of Phantom. What the actual fuck??? “What the fuck Phantom”.

The ghost shrugs, not looking back to her, “yes I can reabsorb my lost ecto, it’s just really not efficient or worth the effort. I produce and absorb ecto quick enough to replace whatever I’ve lost that it’s redundant to absorb what I’ve lost”.

Valerie shakes her head and forces herself to get up too, “what a technical way to say you’re over powered”. Which results in his cheeks instantly lighting up green, much to her amusement. He’s… actually okay-ish by some fucking stroke of pure luck.

Phantom clears his throat and points at her, making general gestures to her entire body, “well, ah, Amity’s also my lair so that helps”.

She scowls at It, “fuck you, again”, sighing and glancing down at herself, “if you think I’m going down and having tea with my father while covered in your ectoplasm, you’re kidding yourself”. At least he chuckles at that before poking her and seemingly absorbing his ecto. Fucking small mercies she guesses, since she wasn’t sure what to even do about the mess at all. “Some dripped down into Karen and Kevin apartment, they were bitching”.

“Fuck Karen and Kevin”.

She snorts at that which just results in both of them chuckling a little manically. Phantom gesturing to the door, “shall we?”, then shaking his head, “we need therapy”.

Valerie shakes her head to but moves towards the door, “so much therapy”. “Hey I’m supposed to be the issue, stop copying me”; there’s too much genuine sadness in than to make it really passable as a joke. At least the jackass wasn’t floating or anything, that always made him feel a little less inhuman; which was probably the point. That and the ghost was apparently still right shit, as he fucking deserved to be after the crap he just put her through.

Damian smiles and waves at both of them as they enter the living room/kitchen/dining room area (small apartments, am I right?), “so what do you want, I’ve got elderberry, chamomile, lavender berry….”.

As he continues to list on, both smile at him, it’s a little faked and the calm postures are a bit forced, but it’s something. Something tells her that Phantom’s is just a little bit less faked than hers though, which… just makes her pity the ghost more.

End

[redbleedingrose]

What do you think the ic would react like if you told them about if we keep it simple abt mental health problems haha?

Hi dear!! Please reach out if you ever want someone to talk to, if you wanna do that anonymously that is alright as well. I hope that you are doing okay, and things well get better <3

TBH every one of them would act differently!

I think every one of them handles their struggles in different ways! But the most important thing is, they would be there for you in whatever way you needed.

Azriel would be such a good listener. He would listen to all your problems, holding you close, his shadows would swirl around you and play with your hair, and he would allow for his chin to rest on your head as he strokes your back, wrapping his wings to enclose you in a warm caccoon. And he would just murmur words of encouragement, and then would help you fall asleep. He is gonna make sure that you get enough rest, and is your silent rock.

Cass is so emotionally intelligent. He undoubtedly would offer the best advice and would be there for you to help you with managing your emotions. He would cook you a nice dinner so you can eat, make sure you are drinking your water. He would go as far as making sure that you are able to get out of bed and going on walks with him. Anytime that he can get you out of the house and out of the dark place you are in, he will take.

I think Rhysand would do just about anything to help you. You already know he is going out of his way to find the best therapist in Valeris and is booking you an appointment. He is buying you small gifts or flowers or dresses just to see you smile, even if it is just for a little. And I think he would also be booking a vacation outside of Night Court to Summer or Day or Dawn even. He wants you to relax, to not be worried about the things at home, and maybe escape a little from the problems that you are dealing with. And he is absolutely hiring cleaners so when you get home, your house is clean and smelling fresh, and bright. That way, when you come home, you are refreshed and ready to deal with some of the stuff that is bothering you.

I think Morr would such a cuddler. She is coming over every day to check in on you, especially when you are not getting out of bed, and will just climb into bed and cuddle with you. If you don't talk, she will fill the silence with little anecdotes about her day or what she is looking forward to. I think eventually, she will just start tidying around your room and pulling you out of bed. She will have you get in a warm bath and will help you wash and clean yourself. And then she is gonna rub some lavender lotion all over your body and help you get ready for the day. She would most likely take you out shopping, especially to help redecorate or for clothes. And then she is taking you to cafes or your favorite restaurants and ordering your favorite food for you to eat, and then after she will take you out for wine tasting where you can open up and discuss everything while drinking some of your favorite alcohol.

I think Amren would also be a silent support. TBH I feel like she would act like she doesn't care, but you know she does. Because she is coming over to check in on you, silentely leaving food on your bedside or a good book or something she saw in the market that would maybe lighten your mood. And whenever you are ready to talk, she would let you. I think she would be the one to give you the least sugar coated advice, but it would be solid advice. And maybe at the end, when you have talked everything out, she will give you a 2 second hug with a quick kiss to your temple that she will deny she ever gave you.

Mental health can be really hard to deal with, and it is a struggle for a lot of people. It is just as important to take care of your mental health as your physical health! I highly highly highly encourage therapy, and reaching out for help from a support system that you have whether it be family, friends, a teacher, or even your doctor. I also highly recommend taking things one day at a time, and giving yourself grace through your struggles. You are not alone, and you are loved.

Suicide and Crisis hotline: 988

[recentlyheardcom]

“Health is not a body size. Health is not the number you see on the scale,” the Food Network star saidValerie Bertinelli/Instagram Valerie BertinelliValerie Bertinelli is feeling beautiful after finding her old “fat clothes" in the back of her closet.On Monday, the Food Network star, 63, posted a video on Instagram after finding the outfit she wore in her very first “before photo" as a Jenny Craig spokesperson.“Health is not a body size. Health is not the number you see on the scale. Your worth as a human being isn’t dictated by your body,” she said while standing in the mirror while wearing a pink button-up shirt and jeans.“I thought I was fat the last time I wore these clothes,” she said. "I’ve never felt more beautiful, more at peace, more mentally and emotionally stable than I do today and I’m wearing my ‘fat clothes.’ That’s f—ed up.”Bertinelli added in the caption that she found the old clothes in the back of her closet and although she doesn’t know why she kept them, she’s glad she did.“I continue to work on not suppressing or numbing my feelings with food or alcohol and here I am. I am enough,” she wrote. “Our bodies do not define who we are as human being’s. A number on the scale does not define how much love your heart can hold. 🩷Please love yourself, every single part of you. YOU ARE ENOUGH 🤍✌🏻”Related: Valerie Bertinelli Says She's Going Down a Size in Jeans After Doing Dry JanuaryBack in June, Bertinelli posted an Instagram video sharing how much healthier she feels after making some lifestyle changes and prioritizing her mental health in recent months.“So it’s getting about time for me to probably go down another jean size. I can’t believe it. And this all started in November, the month I got free,” she said in the clip, referring to her divorce from Tom Vitale. “And I started really concentrating on my emotional and mental health. And when I started doing that, I started caring about the nutrition that I put in my body more.”“The harsh words and abuse can never be unheard and taken back, but here’s the thing, I wouldn’t have taken them in and believed them in the first place, if I hadn’t been saying harsh and unkind words to myself first,” she added in the caption.At the time, Bertinelli explained that she’s started to care more about how she treats herself and the foods she puts in her body after a year of therapy, journaling, meditation and more.She continued, “Caring not so much about calories but what are in those calories? Am I getting enough fiber? Am I getting enough protein? Am I getting enough vitamins, naturally, in my food? Am I drinking too much? What makes me feel better?  What makes my body feel better? Keyword, FEEL better.”Dominik Bindl/Getty Valerie BertinelliNever miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE's free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from juicy celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.Bertinelli also noted that she’s “cut back exponentially” on alcohol, which has helped losing weight, which she said she was “carrying for protection.”“I don’t need protection any longer. I’m really starting to love myself. Deep down,” she ended. “All this to say I have a lot to talk about and will continue to do so. Thank you for coming on this journey with me. Please be kind to yourselves. You deserve it. We all do. We are enough. 🤍✌🏻”In February, the Hot in Cleveland star posted a TikTok video sharing the "side effect" she experienced after giving up alcohol for the month for Dry January."So, here's a nice little side effect of Dry January. These jeans that I'm wearing were so tight a few months ago that I couldn't comfortably button them. Now, they're so loose it's time for me to go down a size," she said with a laugh. "Yeah, I like that side effect."Under the video, one follower commented that they've also been feeling a lot healthier after doing not only Dry January but Dry October as well."Oooh, sober October. I like it," Bertinelli responded. "I may also do dry July.

💃🏼💃🏼💃🏼"For more People news, make sure to sign up for our newsletter!Read the original article on People.

[trek-tracks]

Can you just imagine being Bones in The Undiscovered Country?

The Undiscovered Country is literally Bones' worst nightmare greatest hits, three months from second retirement.

1. Couldn't save a life despite his best, most desperate efforts.

2. Peace rested on his saving that person, and now millions might die based on his failure.

3. The Chancellor was probably beyond saving, but Bones feels helpless because of the information he just didn't know. Remember when Bones said "All my knowledge, and I can't save him!"? You know, when Sybok made him relive the death of his father? His "I was desperate to save him!" at the trial calls back to that moment, as well.

4. Gets called an incompetent drunk in an official setting, which is absolutely humiliating, but plays on his lifelong insecurities. If he's not a competent doctor, what is he? What does he have left?

5. Gets sent to yet another damn ice planet to die via hard labour (again, three months from retirement: "What a way to finish!") primarily because the Klingons want revenge on Kirk and he just happens to loyally be there at the time, asks to be left behind to freeze to death for the THIRD time.

6. Watches Spock force a mind meld with Valeris, causing him to relive his own trauma with Mirror Spock, which now no longer differentiates between them in the one thing he told himself his universe's Spock would never do, so he could eventually regain his equilibrium after what happened...

and we never even get a closeup on his face at this moment:

Rude.

All I'm saying is, this man deserved one hell of a retirement party...or at least an apology, and some serious therapy.

[omg-im-such-a-masochist]

I absolutely love your writing...

Can I possibly get some smutty make up sex with my MadKing, Eddie Kingston? Maybe Eddie being an ass after a loss and he takes it out on the reader...

Thanks 💋😘❤

Thank you so much 🥰 Oh boy 😏 yes you can!

You’re welcome and thank you for your kindness 😘💋

@theworldofotps , @drewmcintyrekoccsrocbwdgfan , @alyhull , @new-zealand-chic , @waywardwrestlewritingwaif , @sassymox , @aerynscrichton , @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch , @ava-valerie , @ecarroll1978

If there’s one thing Eddie for sure can’t control

It’s his temper

You’ve never seen someone so moody as he is before

And learning how to deal with it was...difficult

Because sometimes you want to punch him in the face

While others you just want to take care of him

But today?

He was so angry you didn’t even know how to act

He. was. FEROCIOUS

“Eddie-“ You tried to speak but he lifted his index finger in the air in a motion for you to save it

“Not today, fox! Not today!”

“Eddie let’s talk-“

“I don’t want to fucking talk about my feelings like I’m in some kind of shitty therapy session!” He closed the distance between you until your foreheads almost touched each other “Fuck off!”

Mox tried to pull Eddie away from you

Trying to put some reason on his mind, and make him aware of the shit he was about to do

But you were having none of it! You know Eddie and even though he’s all bark and no bite, you on the other hand, is the complete opposite

“You did not just speak to me like that! What the fuck is your problem?” You snapped at him

“Get. The. Fuck. OUT! I’m in no mood to be around people even more around you and your ridiculous ‘let’s talk about it’ that does nothing but piss me off even more! Fuck off, Y/N!”

“Y/N?” Your voice sounded broke and hurt.

Eddie NEVER called you by your name! He always said that it was too impersonal to him and he’d rather call you something else. Something only he would use

No matter what happened you were ALWAYS “Fox” never “Y/N”

Tears threaten to roll down your cheeks but you’d never let him see you like that

“Fine, Edward” The mention of his ‘full’ name made him frown.

He didn’t like that. You never called him Edward. Not even when you were extremely mad at him. *This is not right* He thought to himself

“I’ll leave you alone” You couldn’t hold back your tears anymore as you took your purse out of his locker “I’ll stop by your house tomorrow to grab my stuff” And just like that you left without looking back

“See what you just did, asshole?” Mox slapped the back of his head “I told you to shut the fuck up! Now she never wants to see you again, congratulations!” Mox grabbed his duffel bag and before he realized it, Eddie ran out to the parking lot

“FOX! HOLD UP!” He screamed and ran towards your car like a maniac

“Stupid thing, just go, damn it!” You tried to start your car but the cursed thing wouldn’t work

“Fox, open up” He tried to open the passenger door “C’mon baby, please” He knocked on the window

“Fuck off!”

“Foxy, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t-“

“Save it, Kingston! I don’t care” You tried to start the car again, but no luck, the damn thing was still dead “Let’s go, fucking thing!” You slapped the steering wheel

Soon after you heard a knock on your window “Please, fox? At least roll down the window so we can talk” His voice was so smooth and soft that before you realized it, you did just as he said and spat “What?” Without looking at him

“Please look at me?” He asked and when you stared into his green eyes, he continued “Thank you... I’m sorry. I love you so much and yes I was completely wrong! I shouldn’t lash out on you about something you didn’t do and it was clearly not your fault, but I was fuming with rage and when you asked if I wanted to talk about it-“

“I was trying to help you” You murmured

“I know, baby. I know you were and that’s why I’m an asshole! Because here you are a gorgeous, perfect woman, who for some reason loves me, trying to help me and my dumb ass keeps fucking it up. I-“ He sighed “I’m an asshole and I deserve all of your hate, I’ll even let you punch me if that will make you feel better” He said and you couldn’t help but laugh at his statement “I mean it!” Eddie frowned at you “Kick me in the balls as hard as you can, if you will. Just please don’t leave me” He whispered “I can’t live without you, fox”

You saw pure honesty in his eyes “I’m still upset with you”

“Let me make it up to you then, please foxy” He placed his head inside the window until his lips were mere inches away from yours “I love you and I’m truly sorry” He quickly pecked your lips, to see if you were ok with him kissing you “Please forgive me” And when he found no signs of you shutting him off, he deepened the kiss

“Open the back door” He smirked

“Why?” You frowned but did as he said

Eddie quickly sat on the backseat and met your eyes on the inside rearview mirror “Let’s relive our first date, foxy”

“You wanna?” You gasped and looked back to him “In here? Eddie no!” You laughed

Eddie slapped his thigh “C’mon, fox. No one will know” He chuckled while helping you jump to the backseat

[themculibrary]

Bucky/Darcy Masterlist

A Curse and A Blessing (ao3) - Anogete E, 46k

Summary: Bucky doesn't think touch therapy can cure his insomnia. Steve disagrees and recruits Darcy to "treat" Bucky with hugs each day. It doesn't take long for things to escalate when you've got a flirty ex-assassin and a lab assistant with a crush.

A Fairy Tale (ao3) - acaseofthemondays M, 84k

Summary: A wintershock story based on the original version of La Belle et la Bete with all the interfering fairies and none of the talking furniture.

A Mask of My Disguise (ao3) - amidtheflowers E, 86k

Summary: He didn't think much of her at first. She drank bubble tea every day for Christ's sake. But he won't make that mistake again--not when her taser stares down his nose.

"I really hope you didn't think I couldn't handle myself."

Best Supporting Soulmate (ao3) - Valeris M, 46k

Summary: There were thousands of studies about what a person’s soul marks did to their psychological development. Darcy generally thought that they were bullshit.

Daybreak (ao3) - Anogete E, 70k

Summary: Darcy eavesdrops on a therapy session between Bucky and Sam Wilson and wants to find a way to make Bucky's life a little better. The problem is she doesn't know how to introduce herself without sounding like a creep. Lucky for her, Bucky isn't as clueless as he might seem.

First Sight (ao3) - grimeysociety E, 20k

Summary: Prompt: Rebuilding Avengers HQ on a new site, and they get Jane to help with some of the science bits. Darcy comes with her. Bucky’s is smitten on first sight and of course Steve and Sam are stuck between lightly teasing him and trying to get him to at least talk to her.

In Love with the Moment (ao3) - Anogete E, 73k

Summary: Jane and Darcy have been recruited to help support and rebuild the science side of the Avengers after the events of Endgame. Darcy can't believe her luck when the hottest guy around offers to help her with the luggage as they arrive. She's not exactly sure what his deal is, and he doesn't exactly seem willing to share, though. Eventually discovering his secret doesn't stop her from inviting him to come along to her parents' house as her fake boyfriend. Bucky can't seem to stay away from the pretty brunette with the big eyes, not even when spending time with her means meeting her parents before he's even kissed her.

Interlude (ao3) - sarahbeniel E, 66k

Summary: Bucky and Darcy are having trouble communicating. When Bucky suggests they take a break, she assumes it's over. But sometimes a break is just what the doctor ordered...

Just Keep on Keeping Your Eyes on Me (ao3) - Hollyspacey M, 3k

Summary: Darcy and Bucky don’t say very much to one another at first, but that’s ok with them both.

Never Have I Ever (ao3) - Wunderlass E, 8k

Summary: Darcy hates drinking games. They always make her feel inadequate.

Oh lights go down, in the moment we're lost and found (I just wanna be by your side) (ao3) - sarcastic_fina T, 4k

Summary: Allen took an instant liking to Darcy, asked her out on the spot, and this was their second date.

Second. As in the first one went well enough that she was willing to see him again.

It made Bucky’s gut twist.

That Which You Seek (ao3) - Wynn T, 52k

Summary: The man in the booth before Darcy stares down at his pancakes with suspicion.

A few days after Bucky discovers his true identity, Darcy encounters him in a diner 50 miles outside of D.C. having apparently transformed from a handsome long-dead war hero into a creepy, scruffy, pancake-hating serial killer. So of course she tries to help him.

the dame in the silk pajamas (ao3) - notahotlibrarian T, 4k

Summary:

Bucky wants to know three things about this woman: 1) How does she know Clint? 2) Does she ever wear real clothes? 3) How can he get her number?

Alternatively: five times Bucky sees Darcy less-than-fully dressed, and one time she sees him that way.

(trade your) broken wings (ao3) - bloomsoftly E, 75k

Summary: Bucky wonders if she’ll react like all the others when she recognizes who he is; as much as he understands it, he’s so tired of the fear.

She doesn’t.

-or-

the development of a relationship through trust and food. lots of food.

Why Not Today (ao3) - sarahbeniel E, 129k

Summary: With her biological clock ticking and her uncompleted doctoral thesis festering, Darcy Lewis wrestles with questions of how to steer herself into a future that will tick all the right boxes. When an unexpected relationship develops between her and Bucky Barnes, and she finds herself living more in the moment, things get even blurrier.

[sabre-tooth]

Basement Arc #4

It's time to talk about how the basement arc ends. The answer isn’t pretty. It ends in attempted suicide. Again. Honestly how else can it end? So far Sabretooth has:

sought help for his psychological breakdown and trauma

been denied treatment/medication

told he’s weak for needing treatment beyond talk therapy

locked in the basement, forced into restraints

treated like a sub-human

*Attacked and lobotomized

treated like an actual animal on a leash

been deliberately re-traumatized with accusations of past deeds

the only person who showed him any tentative trust or affection was rejected by her peers because of it

So yeah. Sabretooth breaks out of his prison in the X-mansion and attempts suicide by cop/suicide by X-men. Let’s see how that goes down.

It starts in Uncanny X-Men #328 with professor Xavier telling a heavily bound and restrained Sabretooth that Xavier feels he’s beyond help, and that he’s giving up trying to help him.

Despite his heavy restraints, Bishop is still waiting outside-- literally waiting for a reason to shoot Sabretooth.

And what exactly was the reason that caused Xavier to finally lose faith and give up? Sabretooth imagined killing and eating some deer in the fake digital jungle environment that Xavier was keeping him in. An environment that he specifically said he didn’t relate to and didn’t want to be in. And not even real deer. Not even real fake deer. Imaginary fake deer. Sabretooth imagined killing and eating some deer, and Professor Xavier decided that meant he was beyond redemption.

Xavier excuses Magento’s crimes as resulting from his trauma, but completely fails to acknowledge that Victor’s trauma played any part in his actions or mental illness.

Xavier, in front of Sabretooth, calls Valerie Cooper and says he’s done all he can and is turning Sabretooth over to the government.

Then Tabitha shows up where they have Sabretooth restrained, accuses him of lying to her, and slaps him. What he’s supposed to have lied about is not made clear. Its entirely possible she doesn’t even know, as this is directly after the ‘intervention’ bullied her into refusing to be kind to him. Betsy is there, egging her on.

After being slapped, Sabretooth taunts Tabitha and gets under her skin enough to get her to attack him-- destroying the restraints around him. He thanks her for helping him escape, and then Psylocke immediately attacks him. Psylocke tells Tabitha to go, but she doesn’t.

Sabretooth and Psylocke fight, and she tries to pacify him with her psionic knife, giving him the pacifying ‘glow’ that he had been trying to get the psychics in the house to give him the entire time. But it doesn’t work, apparently because Wolverine’s lobotomy cured him of.

Sabretooth carves a hole in the wall and flees the mansion without hurting Tabitha.

Sabretooth Special (1996), Sabretooth flees into the sewers, knowing the X-men are coming after him, and considering himself ‘prey’.

Caliban catches Sabretooth, and they fight. Sabretooth tries to convince Caliban to try to kill him.

After beating Caliban, Sabretooth goes back to his Manhattan safehouse. The X-men guess that he may go there and they break in.

I think this is the thing that somehow galls me above all else. The X-men are in Sabretooth’s apartment. His tidy apartment full of books, art and a bonsai tree. And Jean says this. “What are you implying, Scott, that Creed would escape from the mansion-- only to hide from us by acting like a regular human being? He can’t become civilized anymore than you or I could pretend to be savages!”

In fact this pisses Sabretooth in the comic off so much that he attacks them immediately, despite having been hiding and listening. He tells them to get out of his home.

Sabretooth fights with the X-men and he tells them he’s not going back. Never. He takes a hostage and escapes into the subway. He fights with Beast, taunts him, and insists, unconvincingly, that he never wanted help from the X-men. He fights with Angel on the rooftop and wounds him.

Sabretooth squares off with Jean in the subway and puts a fine point on the events of the last few months. “It wasn’t supposed to be this way, was it? Nooo--I was gonna shove down the animal inside a’me ‘cause I wanted to, right? ‘Cause all you X-men showed me it would be the right thing to do! Look inside a’me, Jeannie-- find out why I couldn’t do what Xavier wanted me to. See why I ain’t never gonna be man enough t’beat back the burning inside a’me… the way Logan does every single day of his lousy life.” To which Jean responds by calling him garbage.

He squares off with the X-men again, and in case you thought I was exaggerating on the ‘suicide by cop’ thing, Cyclops calls him out on it.

“For the past few hours, Creed, you havn’t been running away from us, have you? You’ve been running to something. Your death! If you can’t hurt us--kill us--then you’d rather die here tonight, wouldn’t you?” Sabretooth doesn’t deny this at all. In fact, he asks Cyclops if he’s ever seen the end of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

Then Cyplops lays him out-- and Val Cooper’s tactical team hamburger him with bullets, pronounce him dead, and take him away to force him to be in X-factor. I guess I’m gonna talk about X-factor later.

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom 14-20 thoughts!! I finished up s1 :D these last few eps were actually really really good!!!

-did. did tucker really just say esperanto was a dead language only spoken as a secret code between geeks. google says around 100,000 people actively speak it. oh my god...it being an auxiliary language doesn't mean its 'just for geeks to speak in code' ...it helps bridge gaps between people who don't have a language in common...

-danny really isn't pulling punches when it comes to fighting the ghost-cop possessed people huh. like he SLAMMED KWAN INTO THE CONCRETE SO HARD. HE THREW PAULINA INTO A BILLBOARD. will that...I mean it WOULD carry over to their bodies non-possessed, right? like if the ghost piloting their bodies gets hurt?? itd be so upsetting to be possessed, lose time, then wake up covered in bruises (and possibly, broken bones??) real horror movie stuff im sure wont be addressed in any way

-tuckers parents seem nice! I like them :)

-WULF IS CUTE AND I FEEL BAD. im so glad the gang realized he was only causing trouble bc of the shock collar walker put on him and helped. also, him wearing that big hoodie with the hood on, and thinking its subtle. we can tell youre still a giant wolfie :) THEN GETTING SUCKED INTO THE PORTAL AAAAH :( anxiously waiting to see Him Again....

-DANNY BLASTING HIS PARENTS THINKING THEY WERE OVERSHADOWED LMFAO GET THEIR ASSES. maddie marking how many ghosts she gets with lipstick tallies on the side of her portal gun? kindaaa iconic tho. (ALSO, SHE WAS LIKE, 2 FT AWAY FROM HIM RIGHT AFTER SHE TRIED TO SHOOT HIM. HOW DO YOU NOT RECONINZE YOUR OWN SON??? like sure, he might have diff hair/eye colors. but like, if one of my family members dyed their hair, and was wearing contacts, its not like id be like 'wHO IS THIS STRANGER!!!' ...he still has all his facial features!! same everything!!! I hate it here)

-paulina being #1 girl realizing danny's a friendly ghost immediately. smart queen. lancer and kwan ran away right after he made this sweet baby face at them:

which is hilarious.

-ok. im not saying his bullying is JUSTIFIED, but. dash looked so pleased with the (cute!) poster he just painted, and danny comes thru the wall and spills paint on his nice letterman jacket. his anger is justified maybe 65% of the time so far...(not the way he handles it, but STILL.) at least lancer is stepping in!! and them making a silly little bet was...cute?? until dash pulled out his GROSS UNDERWEAR AND SAID DANNY WOULD HAVE TO EAT THEM???? WHAT THE FUCK MAN. TUCKER WAS SO RIGHT ITS FUCKING WEIRD TO CARRY THOSE AROUND EWWW. THIS KID IS UNWELL. lancer was right, his animatronic setup was SUPER IMPRESSIVE?? hes actually pretty creative. danny meanwhile is stealing the fright knight's design...I hope dash is taking art classes or smth with his sports

-fright knight is the most bestest ghost so far i LOVE THAT DESIGN. I am biased towards knights, and characters with swords, but he fucks so severely. and should sue danny for copyright infringement for stealing his design for his haunted house. if some 14 yr old broke into MY house and stole MY sword, id also be pissed. his evil winged unicorn rules too with its FANGS. and he just CAN SHOVE THE PORTAL OPEN WITH HIS HANDS??? is he the strongest ghost weve seen so far? idk but hes my fav. SOUL SHREDDER IS SUCH A COOL SWORD NAME TOO. ANY NAMED SWORD ALSO FUCKS. 'flaming bedsheets of DEATH' funny king. ALSO he was polite to dash and tucker when just asking for directions and telling tucker 'oh maybe, just a suggestion, maybe be nicer to me and be more respectful :)' I LOOOVE HIM.

-I noticed this in the Ember ep, but jazz has an electric guitar in her room!! talent musical queen!! its cool to see hobbies just in the bg.

-fright knight's murder castle reminds me of the booby trapped murder castle in zexal!! another supposedly 'for kids' show with murder/trap castles! we love that. if you are a dp fan reading this, give yugioh zexal a try. its also got 13-14 year old protags and involves (alien) ghosts. the cardgame is just a vessel for the plot, which is really good. (I just want more people to watch my fav yugioh, man)

-danny. with a SWORD.

-danny doesnt NEED TO WIN this contest, dash didnt STEAL HIS DESIGNS AND STEAL A SWORD. he also got excited to hear lancer got sent to a dimension with his worst fears too just so he could win the contest? DANNY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!!! BRO MAYBE YOURE 14 AND HAVENT FULLY DEVOLPED YOUR WHOLE BRAIN YET, BUT...THATS FUCKED. this kid casually says the most deranged things, I do worry for my spooky son. once again, therapy needed. that judo toss was great tho. I wonder if he actually did pick up some martial arts stuff from his mom?

-danny can fly 112 mph!!! thats so fast! I love the lil montage of him and his friends testing his abilities and stuff, very cute and a good way to showcase what he can do by now and how much more proficient he's gotten from ep 1!!! I'm sure he's going to get more abilities :)

-im glad...maddie's at least TRYING this ep. I do feel for her because her husband is a man baby. but the fact it took 16 episodes to get a kinda semblance of any kind of real concern or attempts at bonding. hmm. jack's 'BACK OFF SHES A MINOR' @ the ghost trying to attack jazz. also was very funny. and him wanting to make an action figure of her? are the parents redeeming themselves to me? slightly. they gotta Work Harder

-THE GHOST. IS FLYING. THE PLANE.

-fenton machete. but she doesnt carry a PHONE??? ???

-I mean I expected vlad when you namedrop him earlier in the ep, and also the title card picture, and dalv corp being fucking vlad backwards. but seeing him just pull up on a golf cart made me bust out laughing. WITH the gift baskets prepared. why wouldnt you at least be suspicious. also, if he wants danny to be his lil sonboy, why is he so fucking malicious?? dude you are going about this in such a bad way. stop it. get some help.

-maddie not even hesitating to drag danny out. fucking good. danny is so right, go on the internet to date. get a cat. how do you spend...how many years?? has it been since college?? at least 20, right, since the parents/vlad are in their 40s? hung up on ONE girl. my god, man. incel drama queen. her kung fu IS impressive, but dude. 'we both know hes a creep' SO right. it sucks but they do need a phone and shit being in the middle of NOWHERE. also, just stealing his helicopter was great. <3

-'you must be exhausted carrying the weight of that mistake you made years ago' 'well we all make mistakes. maybe I'll make one now!' WHY DID THIS EXHCHANGE SEND ME. AND VLAD WITH THE BREATH SPRAY EWWW BITCH. 'OLD BAIT BREATH' SOO RIGHT. both danny and his mom playing him HAHAH hes so dumb. or rather, I think he thinks with his emotions too too much and is...actually pretty gullible? lmao he believed danny was ready to give in SO fast. (which is sad hes that hopeful, like you have SO MUCH MONEY YOU COULD EASILY GET ANOTHER GIRL WHO HAS A KID. AND WOULD WANT TO BE WITH YOU AND BE SUPPORTED. GET OVER THIS (1) WOMAN ALREADY IM GETTING SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT AAAAH)

-GHOST BEAR GHOST BEAR GHOST BEAR. it was also in the title card, but I still got very excited. we love bears here

-SAM'S BAT SWIMSUIT COVERUP!!! her outfits are simply iconic.

-'i'd tell you to go to the mens room, but I don't think you qualify' top paulina transphobic moments. :( and him wearing a tanktop to the swim park? hmmm! (actually I think she was overshadowed by then, so, KITTY top 10 transphobic moments??)

-kitty just piloting paulina around makes me feel SO bad tho, paulina's gonna wake up and be like 'wtf do you mean I was dating this rando' like youre leading danny on to make johnny jealous, and also just POSSESSING POOR PAULINA. dude take your relationship problems ELSEWHERE. last time we saw them, they seemed like such a cute couple!! wtf johnny!! I mean, she sucks for trying to make him jealous, he sucks for looking at other girls...maybe they need a break, but Not Like This. or, you know, just. better communication...

-and the A-listers having a full packet and a stamp system. who organizes this. kwan fucking owning being the new danny though, this is hysterical. THE TUCKER/KWAN FLOWER FIELD TWIRL. UNIRONICALLY ADORABLE. and him giving it his all for the poetry slam. bless his HEARTTTT.

-Star owns. actually, all of the extra characters are shining this ep and I love it.

-INVISO-BILL??? NOOOO THEY DID HIM SOO DIRTY. DANNY SWEETIE IM SO SORRY.

-johnny and danny bein friends and staging a fake fight (which danny takes too seriously, once again this child has aggression he NEEDS TO WORK OUT) I hope these three stay friends, I said it before but danny needs more friendly ghosts to hang with.

-at this point, Danny's ghost enemies are a lot like, I dunno, batman's rouge gallery is the first thing that comes to mind. they all have their own gimmick and unique designs, but most of them are easy to beat after learning the Moral Lesson. I still get excited when any of them show up again, though. 18 is another valerie episode!!!! :D skulker really said you two will get along if I have to handcuff you together <3 and the gym teacher really said, youre married now, have a flour baby! ngl, I'm not really watching this show for the shipping stuff (which I am very scared to look at the fandom for after I finish this watch through- I feel like there's probably discourse/arguing about ships...) but. I'm gonna put my opinion out there. valerie/danny > sam/danny. maybe I just really love the enemies to lovers trope. And the secret identity stuff adds Extra Flavor.

-SKULKER JUST HAVING THE BOX GHOST AND DANGLING HIM BY A STRING. HILARIOUS. and him watching them with binoculars and making his silly little commentary. AND MAKING THE SACK BABY CRY. LMAO. THIS DUDE IS A BABY KIDNAPPER. skulker is super fun

-danny, you just...collapsed the water tower. and then attacked the nasty burger machine...mascot thingy...out of anger..I KEEP SAYING HE'S GOT ANGER ISSUES BUT. HE REALLY NEEDS A LESSON IN MANAGING COLLATERAL DAMAGE!!! So does valerie!! They're both pretty focused on each other. I mean it's good of Danny to say he's trying to make sure PEOPLE don't get hurt, but... (I mean I guess it's not something 14 year olds WOULD worry about, but as an adult im like, who's going to fix that? how much money will that take??)

-TUCKER MAKING BANK. and sam and tucker being super emotionally attached to their flour baby and being pretty good parents. that's cute...also him just straight kissing her and being like. WAIT. O_O JDSKAFHD. his mom baking them into cookies was the funniest possible result. tbh I dont feel like this is on tucker, if anything the other kid's shouldve been more responsible! He was just taking an opportunity to get that $$ which I respect

-Danny being more understanding of Valerie's situation in the end (helping her at her job, too, and trying to keep that a secret for her!!!) And seeing them work together this ep, and also her letting phantom get her out of the ghost zone...was very sweet. LOVE that. more valerie eps pls

-me when I realize vlad's big stupid house exploded because of his own carelessness with changing the ghost portal ectofiltrator or whatever: *pointing and laughing*

-me when I realize it means he's gonna go make danny's life hell for it somehow: >:(

-SCOOBY PARODY!!! I feel like there's gotta be some scooby doo/danny phantom crossover stuff, right? also, 'guys in white' men in black wishes

-'oh, that's right! dad married the love of your life! you're bitter and alone!' DANNNNNYY GET HIS ASS ONCE AGAIN WE ARE POINTING AND LAUGHING AT VLAD

-'jack, you captured the ghost boy!!' UMM. he did nothing <3 'we have a weapon's vault??' YOU HAVE A WEAPONS VAULT??? and jack didnt put a handle on the inside. of fucking course he didnt! why would you leave that to your son!! or expect him to clean YOUR LAB when its where you work with probably dangerous chemicals and weapons and hes 14!! give him normal chores, like, I dunno, vacuuming, laundry, dishes...CMON. I hate it here. But I'm glad Jack is more chill about danny while he's a ghost, and willing to work with him for this ep. AND. I DID ENJOY JACK PUNCHING VLAD IN THE FACE. AND GENERALLY JUST OWNING HIM. the ghost punchy fists are actually amazing. like yeah, just punch a ghost in the face. that rules.

-ep 20 opens with the coolest fucking ghost lady design. her tattoos can come off and fight. MA'AM. I like ur nose ring and your cape maam hello 👉👈😳

-sam's grandma is hilarious and the most valid member of her family and I love her. thats my grandma now. and tucker covering for sam by dressing as her. thats true friendship <3 also skipping school to go to a goth circus. just bestie things! sam's parents are haters but for all the wrong reasons.

-'my family has controlled ghosts with this for generations!' WAIT. WAIT FREAKSHOW /ISNT/ A GHOST? I didn't expect that...he's just a fucked up guy controlling ghosts? anyway watching danny shoot at police cars and rob banks while mind controlled. its like, the most stereotypical 'bad' things lmao. (tbh an evil ghost circus troupe is a sick concept)

this gives off big deviantart emo edit vibes

(I'm going to assume evil circus reaper danny has a lot of fan content. people love an edgy au, except this one is canon (even tho its via mind control...having the protag go evil otherwise might be hard, I guess?) but au where he stays with the troupe...that has to exist, right?)

ANYWAY. excited to start s2!! lowkey surprised by how many notes some of these posts have gotten. I've gone back and tagged them all with 'dp thoughts' so they're easier to find on my blog! ^^ and I will probably possibly do (more) fanart on my art blog after I finish the watch of the whole show, so like. @sanchoyodraws follow my art blog :)

[dw-writes]

Can I get a request for a John Kennex x Reader? Soulmate Au or maybe even that fate keeps throwing them together? You're freaking amazing BTW *Hugs*

SCREAMS YES??? I LOVE SOULMATE AUS SO MUCH!!!!!! And, I mean, look at him!! What a cutie. What a fucking smartass. I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS!!!!! Also @writerdee1701 here is some John Kennex!! ( @outside-the-government i think ive seen you reblog Kennex stuff but if not!! i’m sorry!)

A soulmate wasn’t something you wanted. You had sat and suffered and cried over thinking that you had one only to lose it because it wasn’t real and for what? Because the world – the universe? – told you that you were supposed to have a soulmate? Because the moment you turned eighteen the first words your soulmate was meant to say to you appeared on your arm?

No way.

So, after months of intensive therapy and accepting a new job in a city on the opposite side of the country, you did what any sane-but-majorly-depressed person would do: you got the tattoo covered.

You brushed your thumb over the healed black band that encircled your left arm, smiling to yourself – your sister, bless her, had suggested adding flowers, and your tattoo artist had been more than happy to include blooming flowers all around the band, even going so far as to outline them in UV ink, so that you could see the pieces that would be covered by the band itself. You tugged the sleeve of your shirt down to your wrist as you walked into the building, ready for another day at work – another case, another job well done.

You sighed and nodded at your MX-43 as you sat at your desk.

“Don’t look so excited to be here.” You looked up at the voice and felt your lips curl in a smile. John Kennex returned it and held out a second cup of coffee. You took with a grateful grin. “Dunno if you heard, but we’re workin’ a case together today,” he said, leaning on your desk.

You arched an eyebrow as you took a slow sip from your cup. It was just how you liked it, and it warmed you from the inside out. “Again?” you finally asked after another deep drink. He nodded. “You know, if I didn’t know better, I’d almost say we were partners,” you teased.

“I think the captain likes our closure rate,” he pointed out.

“Uh, you mean my closure rate,” you said as you drained your cup and stood, “You just happen to be along for the ride.”

“Oh?” he challenged.

You nodded and grabbed your things from your desk. “Yeah.”

“Those sound like fighting words,” he remarked.

You hummed. “If they were fighting words, I’d say you were there to look pretty, but that’s Dorian’s job!” you chirped. You wrinkled your nose. “You do give good hugs though, so, there’s that.” You patted his chest as you walked past him. “Let’s go!”

Captain Maldonado leaned out of her office as you and John walked past her with a shout of, “Masks!” Both of you lifted your hands and waved over your shoulders.

You didn’t mind sitting in the back of John’s cruiser with your MX, rubbing your thumb over your tattoo as Dorian and your MX rattled off the particulars of the case. You felt eyes on your face throughout the ride but didn’t look up to meet them. When John pulled up to the crime scene, he waved Dorian ahead with your MX and grabbed your arm before you walked past. It took you a moment to look up and, when you did, he was frowning.

“Where are you?” he whispered. You opened your mouth. He shook his head. “Don’t say here, or thinking about the case,” he murmured, “You didn’t hear a word Dorian said on the way here.”

You sighed. “My sister found her soulmate,” you said as you waved towards the bright light line of the ticker tape. John shoved his hands in his pockets as he walked with you. “It’s funny, she’s been living next door to him for a year while teaching in Scotland, and she didn’t know it was him until she ran into him in the hall during laundry day. He had a bird on his shoulder, this big thing, she sent me a picture of it, actually.” You adjusted your mask and pulled out your phone, opening the picture. It was side by side with another photo, one of a bird with its wing in a splint.

John nodded at it. “What’s that?” he asked.

You smiled to yourself. “Before she left, we found a bird in our building parking lot. It had a broken wing, and Maria, she’s got this huge soft spot for birds, so we took it to the vet and they walked us through how to take care of it.”

“And it’s the same bird her soulmate has tattooed, right?” he asked.

“How, how, how does it know that?” you asked, stopped short of the crime scene. You scratched at your arm through your sleeve. “She got her mark when she turned eighteen just like everyone else, and it was a, a, a set of card suits to a losing hand of poker, which turned out to be the exact same hand that Richard had when he lost a bet that ended up with him applying to college to be a teacher.” You shook your head. “I don’t—I don’t understand.”

John’s eyebrows were arched high when you finally looked at him. You ran your fingers behind your ears to adjust your mask while he carefully pulled his off and scratched his chin. “If it makes you feel better,” he said with one of those crooked, amused smiles of his, “I don’t understand it either.”

“No, it doesn’t make me feel better, John, because no one understands it,” you shot back, puffing your cheeks. You turned on your heel and stalked towards the dead body and Dorian and your MX were patiently waiting for you by.

“I’m just trying to make you feel better!” he shouted after your retreating form.

“A for effort!” you shouted back.

The case was a bust in terms of being complicated – the body was a mess, but there was a phone left behind, and a tagged post from the victim with someone else, a boyfriend, who confessed the moment he saw you rolling up to his apartment by shouting out of his window and jumping from it. He wound up with a broken leg and was sitting for sentencing.

John paused at a desk in the bullpen when the two of you returned. You glanced back quickly to find him talking with Valerie, and smiled, pulling off your mask. Dorian followed after you as you wandered back to your desk.

“What’s your mark?” he asked when you sat down.

You glanced up from setting your mask in the UV sanitizer. “That’s…” You leaned back and cleared your throat. “That’s a little out of the blue for you, D.” You shook your head, then picked up your keyboard and started to type out your report. “What, uh, what gives?”

“Saw you and John talking about soulmates earlier,” he said as he pulled up a chair. When you glanced up, he smirked. “I can read lips,” he answered.

You gently tossed your keyboard away from you and sighed. Your eyes drifted across the bullpen. John’s smile still hadn’t faded. “Do you know Chromes don’t have soulmate marks?” you commented.

“No, no, I didn’t know that,” Dorian replied.

You nodded, “Mhmm.” Then, scrubbed your hands over your face, you tilted your head back over the back of your chair. “Something about the way that the changing of genetic make-up eliminates whatever code is programed in us that makes the soulmate tattoos.” You dropped your hands. “He could pick Valerie and no one would argue about it.”

“You’re jealous,” Dorian replied.

“Not jealous,” you shot back.

Dorian adjusted his feet and leaned closer. “So, what’s your mark?” he asked again.

You wrinkled your nose and sat up, pulling your keyboard back to you. Dorian continued to stare. You turned your arm over and yanked up your sleeve. He took your wrist to turn your arm out more. “I got it covered up,” you said, stroking your thumb over a spot in the middle of the black band. “I kinda had a melt down after my mark appeared, and when I finally started to really believe that a soulmate doesn’t make a person, I got it covered.”

“So, what was it?” he asked again. He pushed your thumb aside and brushed his fingers over the band. As he did so, you felt eyes land on you. You set your cheek on your fist. The lights on the side of Dorian’s face lit up. “I see UV ink,” he said as he continued to trace the tattoo, “Flowers?”

“Moonflowers,” you answered with a shrug, “They only bloom once and in very specific conditions.”

“Like a soulmate,” he added with a smile. He looked back down at the band. “Is that a rectangle?”

You pulled your arm back and tugged the sleeve down. “Yeah,” you said. You swallowed a lump that had formed in your throat. “Yeah, just a rectangle.”

“No, there was something else—”

“Everything okay here?” You and Dorian looked up. John stood in front of your desk, glancing between the two of you with a concerned frown. You scratched your neck and nodded, motioning to your screen. Dorian stood and pushed the chair back where it belonged. “You sure?” John asked you.

You nodded again. “Yeah.” You sat back, adjusting the keyboard in front of you. “I’m gonna stay and finish this report. I’ll send it in for the both of us, okay?”

“You sure?”

“I’m sure.” You smiled. “Get outta here.”

He hesitated by your desk, knocking his knuckles against it. “Let me know if you need help, okay?” he murmured.

You stared at him. “John—”

“I’m goin’,” he sighed.

You fished around in your bag and pulled out a set of wireless headphones, then synced it up to your phone, and got to work. Valerie left with a man you didn’t recognize, and Richard walked out after her a few hours later. Captain Maldonado left shortly after them. The lights dimmed and the MX’s headed off to the elevators that took them down to the basement. You stretched your arms above your head and groaned, then tugged the sleeves of your shirt up and twisted around in your seat.

Someone pulled your headphone off. You jumped. John stepped back, holding his hands up. The set dangled from his fingers.

“Didn’t mean to scare you,” he said with an amused smile.

“Why are you still here?” you sighed, rubbing your face. You flopped back into your seat and turned to your computer. John pulled up a chair. He set the headphones down after powering them off, then slid a glass over to you. You stared at it.

“It’s bourbon,” he said with a nod to the glass. You turned your chair slowly until you faced him. “Thought you could use it.”

You picked it up. “You thought right,” you slowly said. He held up his glass. You clinked your own against it with a smile.

As John took a slow drink, he pointed at your arm. You turned it out towards him. “Dorian said it was a moonflower?”

You stopped, the glass to your lips. “Why?” you hesitantly asked.

He stared at your tattoo for a long time. Then, he gulped down the rest of his bourbon and pulled up his sleeve. On the outside of his bicep was a simple rectangle. He turned his arm out and showed you the inside of his arm. The outline of a familiar flower stared back at you. You practically threw your glass onto the desk and slid to the edge of your seat. You traced the flower with a faint touch.

“It was on my leg,” he said after a long stretch of silence. You bit your lip. “Nurse in the ICU was nice enough to draw it better for me after about a hundred ugly little sketches.” You gasped out a laugh, dazed at the fact that it was there, right in front of you. “So, what’s in the rectangle?” he asked.

You glanced up, too engrossed in the fact that your flower was tattooed on his skin. The flower you had thought a good representation of a soulmate - something you made, that was unique, that only appeared after certain conditions were met. You shook your head faintly, and whispered, “The name Reginald in your shitty handwriting.”

“You knew?” he asked.

You licked your lips and hesitantly pulled your hands back. “I dunno, I didn’t know for sure, I hadn’t seen the handwriting since I got it covered up, I—”

John cupped your face in his hands, cutting your sentence off. He leaned in, paused, then closed the gap between you both in a surprisingly soft kiss. Your eyes fluttered closed.

Soulmate or not, you couldn’t believe that he returned your feelings. You gripped the front of his shirt and kissed him back.

[leigh-kelly]

The Nanny

So the last thing I should be doing is writing a new fic, but this is a gift for @yourstreetserenade who has been an absolute gift to this fandom especially during such a difficult time. I’m not sure how frequent updates will be, but they will come!

Just after finishing with four separate brides in the bridal shop she works at in Flushing, Queens, Brittany Pierce hops up on the counter and crosses her legs, tossing her head back. Sugar Motta grabs a bottle of water and thrusts it into Brittany’s hand, before jumping up on the counter next to her. The two of them sit in silence for several minutes, taking in the fact that they have no customers, before the bell on the door tinkles and Brittany takes a swig out of the bottle and climbs down, smoothing her dress.

“Oh, hey Dani.” She grins, walking over to her girlfriend. Before she can give her a kiss, Dani puts her hand up, and Brittany furrows her brow.

“No kiss?”

“Look, Brittany, we need to talk.”

“Uh, sure, shoot.”

“Somewhere private.” Dani gestures over to Sugar, who makes herself look busy with her boss’ presence in the store.

“Don’t worry, no one’s in here.” Sugar pops her gum and sticks a pin into the dress on one of the mannequins.

“You are, Sugar. Brittany, let’s go into my office.”

“Aw c’mon Dan, I’ve told you a thousand times, if you tell me something, I’m just going to tell Sugar anyway, you may as well just say it. Besides, we’ve had a real rush in here today, and I don’t wanna leave her stranded if it happens again.”

“Fine.” Dani sighs, exasperated. “We’ve had a good run, Britt, but there’s someone else.”

“Someone else? What are you talking about? We’re pre-engaged.”

“Yeah!” Sugar agrees. “We’ve already been picking out Brittany’s wedding dress.”

“Sugar, this is really a couple’s conversation.”

“How are you going to say it’s a couple’s conversation if you just said we’re not a couple anymore?” Brittany tries to hold back her tears, but she finds that she’s failing miserably. “How could you do this?”

“It just happened, Quinn and I ran into each other a few weeks ago at—”

“Quinn? You’re breaking up with me for Quinn Fabray? How am I supposed to work here knowing that you’re sleeping with that shameless hussy?”

“You sound a little like your mother, Britt.” Sugar interjects.

“Shut up, Sugar.”

“Well, about that.” Dani wrings her hands in front of her body. “Quinn needs a job, and, well…”

“So not only are you breaking up with me, you’re firing me?” Brittany grabs her purse from behind the counter and makes toward the door as Dani reaches for her. “Don’t touch me. You can’t fire me, I quit!” She pushes the door open, gets halfway through and turns around. “No, you fired me, that way I can collect unemployment.”

----

“Kurt!” Santana Lopez calls out, sitting behind the desk in her home office and shuffling through a stack of paperwork. “Come in here!”

“You bellowed, Ms. Lopez?” Kurt opens the door, adjusting his tie.

“Have any of the prospective nannies arrived yet? Rachel is on me—”

“She wishes.” He mutters under his breath.

“Excuse me?”

“Nothing.”

“Rachel is on me about the party on Saturday night. If Tyler scares one more nanny away, I’m sending him to boarding school.”

Santana puts her head in her hands on continues to go through her paperwork. Ever since her wife died five years ago, she’s been overwhelmed by the demands of her career and taking care of her three children. Valerie, the oldest, had been thrust into puberty and is off the walls with her emotions, Tyler does everything in his power to force anyone who came into the house to leave, and Abigail, the baby, is in therapy twice a week and trying to deal with the fact that she barely remembers her mother at all, but sometimes Santana thinks it’s making her worse, not better. On top of all that, she has Rachel who is constantly demanding every moment of her attention, and she’s been through eight nannies who just can’t seem to manage her children, so she can give the focus she needs to her career.

“There’s the bell.” Kurt breaks her from her thoughts. “Let’s hope the ninth time’s the charm and this nanny that the agency sent over can actually manage Master Tyler.”

“Tell her I’ll be with her in a minute, I just need to finish up in here.”

“Yes, Ms. Lopez.”

Kurt exits the room and goes to answer the door. Standing before him is a leggy blonde in a bright pink mini dress and stiletto heels. She’s not exactly what he expected from the agency and is certainly a far cry from any of the other nannies they’ve seen over the past five years, but he steps back and lets her in.

“Ms. Lopez says she’ll be right with you. I expect you have your resume?”

“Resume? I—uh…” The blonde clutches the makeup kit she carries close to her chest and looks around.

“Yes, resume. You know, the list of your previous experience as a nanny, which I presume you have quite a bit of?”

“Resume. Nanny. Right. Yeah, I, uh…totally have it. Say, butler man, do you think I could get a glass of water?”

“As you wish.”

When Kurt leaves the room to get her a glass of water, Brittany scrambles through her makeup kit. She had no intention of applying for a job as a nanny, she was just at this gorgeous mansion to try and sell makeup so she could get out of her parents’ house, now that she was no longer living with Dani, but like she always thought, when opportunity knocks, she’s got to answer. Unfortunately, all she has with her is an order form and a few tubes of lipstick, but she’ll make do, quickly scribbling her name and phone number in Monroe Red along the back of the form and trying to write down her years of working at Dani’s Discount Bridal before the butler comes back with her water. She’s just about finished when a dark-haired boy bursts into the room clutching a knife to his chest and collapses on the floor with a pool of ketchup staining his white shirt.

“Eh, mediocre performance.” She stands over his twitching body and his eyes pop open. “Next time, you want to get some of that fake costume blood off of Amazon. Ketchup is so 1990s.”

“I’ll have you know.” The boy feigns a gasp. “I’m dying here.”

“We’re all dying, kid.” Brittany laughs. “What’s your name, anyway?”

“What business is it of yours?”

“I’m just making conversation. So, you live here, or what?”

“No.” He deadpans. “I just hang around random mansions looking to scare unsuspecting nannies.”

“You’ve really gotta get better at this scaring thing. I’m telling you, I could give you some tips that’ll have you winning Academy Awards.”

“I’ll have you know I’ve scared off seven nannies in five years, and if you’d stop messing with my plan, you’d be number eight.”

“I don’t scare easily, you’ve never met my mother. Trust me, she’ll tell you the story of the time she thought she had to poop, gave birth to me in a barn and wrapped me up in a Mr. Submarine wrapper, and you’ll be scarred for life.”

“Ew.” The boy sticks out his tongue. “That’s disgusting, and I don’t think my mother would appreciate you telling me that story.”

“Your mother will make that decision.” Brittany’s jaw nearly hits the floor when a gorgeous brunette in a pencil skirt and blazer steps into the room. “Santana Lopez, it’s a pleasure to meet you Miss—”

“Pierce. Brittany Pierce.”

“Miss Pierce. Now what was this story you were telling my son?”

“Oh…I…uh…never mind.” Brittany stammers. “We were just getting to know each other.”

“Well, you haven’t run screaming from the house yet, so I suppose that’s going well. Tyler, go get Valerie and Abigail.”

“But Mom—”

“Go.” She shoos him off, and Brittany can’t help but stare at the woman in front of her.

“Santana—”

“I’d prefer if you call me Ms. Lopez, thank you.”

“Right, sorry, Ms. Lopez. Um…he’s a character.”

“That’s one way to put it.” She sighs. “Your resume, please.”

“Oh…yeah. Well, I kind of forgot to bring one with me, but I have this.” Brittany hands over the lipstick scrawled paper, and Santana holds it between two fingers.

“So, you came to an interview without a resume? Is that lipstick?”

“Well, I’m kind of having a bad week, you know how that goes.” She bites her lip, figuring she may as well just show herself the door.

“You’re not here for the interview, are you?”

“I—look, I wasn’t exactly called her for an interview, but I’m telling you, I’m great with kids. I have like…thirty-six little cousins, and I could totally be a nanny.”

“Yet you have no experience. I see here that you worked for…Dani’s Discount Bridal?”

“Mom!” A little girl with her hair in long braids tumbles into the room, and Brittany smiles at how much she looks like San—Ms. Lopez. “Tyler pushed me again!”

“Kid, what’s your deal?” Brittany asks him. “Why do you want everyone not to like you?”

“You can’t talk to me like that! Mom, tell her she can’t talk to me like that!”

“She’s not wrong Tyler. How many times have I had to tell you to keep your hands off your sister?”

“I don’t know.” He rolls his eyes. “About a billion.”

“Look, Miss Pierce, clearly I need more help here than you’re qualified to give. Thank you for coming, I’ll have Kurt see you out.”

“But—”

“I’m sorry. Thank you for your time.”

Kurt enters the living room again holding Brittany’s water, which he immediately sets down on the coffee table, sensing the tone of the room. While he’s escorting Brittany to the door, she catches a glimpse of the oldest Lopez child and she sighs, thinking that she probably could have made some kind of difference in their lives, even if she doesn’t necessarily have any formal training as a nanny. When she gets to the door, another short brunette enters, who gives her a dirty look, and she just exits without another word.

“Santana!” Rachel cries out, looking at the ketchup on Tyler’s shirt with disgust before the kids all scatter from the room in her wake. “I’ve been on the phone all morning with the caterer for Saturday night. I’m telling you, if this party is a disaster, then we’re never going to get the funding we need for our play. They’re going to immediately jump ship and support the next Lin Manuel Miranda production, and we’ll be out in the cold again.”

“Rachel, it’s going to be fine. I just have to focus on getting a nanny for these kids today, and then Saturday will go off without a hitch.”

“What was the matter with that one? Scared off again by Lord Ketchup?”

“No.” Santana looks to the door, feeling like perhaps she’s made some kind of mistake just as the phone rings. “She’s just not right for our family.”

“Well, you better find someone who’s right. We have three million dollars riding on Saturday night being a success, and as much as I adore your children, I just don’t think having them run around our cocktail party will do anyone any favors.”

“Yes, I’m aware, you’ve told me that about forty-six times this week.”

“Ms. Lopez.” Kurt interrupts. “It’s the nanny agency on the phone for you.”

“Rachel, I have to take this. Go into my office and look over the notes for our pitch.”

“You know that I’m your partner, not your employee, right?”

“Okay.” Santana pinches the bridge of her nose. “Decide if you want to look over the notes for our pitch so you can be prepared for Saturday night.”

“I think that sounds like a great idea.” Rachel chirps. “I’ll be waiting for you.”

“Great.” She takes the phone from Kurt and sinks down onto the couch. “Santana Lopez speaking.”

“Ms. Lopez, this is Mindy from the agency. Unfortunately, the interviewee we were sending out to you today was offered another job and has decided to cancel. I can get someone else to you on Monday, maybe Tuesday.”

“Monday or Tuesday isn’t good enough.” Santana snaps. “I’ve told you a dozen times that I need someone for this weekend.”

“I don’t think I’ll be able to do that.”

“You have got to be kidding me. I have three kids who need a nanny, and I have an event Saturday night. Next week is unacceptable.”

“I’ll do what I can, but I don’t think I’ll be able to make it work.”

“Goddamnit.” Santana hangs up the phone and looks at Kurt desperately. “Why is it so hard to find good help in this town?”

“I believe I can still decipher the lipstick on Miss Pierce’s ‘resume.’” Kurt offers. “Maybe you ought to give her a shot. She certainly wasn’t afraid of Master Tyler.”

“She has no experience. And did you see what she was wearing? What kind of influence on Valerie would I be bringing into this house?”

“You certainly seemed a little…preoccupied with her wardrobe if I do say so myself.”

“Honestly, shut up.”

“You need a nanny before Saturday, and she clearly needs a job. Hire her on a trial basis, then you at least have yourself covered and you can resume your interviews next week.”

[oraclememehacker]

I’m going to shill a little bit and gauge reaction here! Cause I can of course. Here are my OC’s that I’ve created over the past years and a little explanation about them.

Adelina Fincher: Age 34, My Ace Attorney OC

She’s a prosecutor for the district of Los Angeles but didn’t originally live there. Her parents are Katherine and Victoria Fincher, highly regarded actors and noted perfectionists. As a kid she was emotionally neglected and abused by her parents who never found anything that she did good enough. This lead her to be more closed off and barely made any friends because she was too busy trying to please her unpleasable parents.

She wanted to be a prosecutor growing up because of law shows but her parents insisted she become an actor like they were and she learned a lot about playing a role because of them. However, she eventually convinced them that she would go to college and get her law degree, and that they would help pay for it. On one condition. She’d get a 4.0 GPA. And she did! At the expense of her social life again aside from 1 friend. But when she graduated she was saddled with a ton of debt because her parents were broke and were going after her for money.

She is straight forward, honest and doesn’t hold anything back. She is also sharp witted and is able to figure out things about people when they are holding back from her. She also has a crippling addiction to pepsi and drinks a 12 pack during court. It takes her a while to warm up to people because of trust issues (her parents betrayed her, she’s had others betray her and so on). But if you break her shell she is very friendly and cracks all sorts of puns and jokes.

Elly Lane: Age 25, a trans female OC

Growing up in San Diego California well before she came out as trans, Elly lived a relatively normal life, though her parents were highly religious. One time as a joke she was forced to wear a dress as a humiliation tactic and she found that she actually found it quite comfortable and that was the start to her becoming trans, though it would be a long time before she realized what it meant. As she grew up, she wore dresses more and more, having to hide them from the prying eyes of her parents who were convinced that she was mentally ill and needed to be subjected to some form of conversion therapy.

Elly took refuge behind a computer screen and is a massive fan of anime and manga. Her favorite Anime/manga of all time is a made up for her anime series called Princess Rikako, a series about a Princess with the ability to shape shift into whatever she wanted, albeit with more realistic limitations to it in terms of being able to change back. It was also a big part of what made her come out as trans. In person she is soft spoken and quick to emotional outbursts, usually tears because getting overwhelmed emotionally is very easy to happen to her.

Online though she is argumentative and defensive of her favorite shows. Japan and it’s culture are her favorite things and she has spent years learning to speak and write and read Japanese on her own, and while she’s not perfect, she was able to go to Japan on vacation and that’s when she eventually came out as trans. In the rp universe I have with her on discord she met up with Ren/Akira and Futaba in Akihibara and eventually became friends with the phantom thieves, and was able to get a job at Leblanc Cafe and stay in Japan whilst working towards her naturalized citizenship. And is currently in the midst of transitioning.

Valerie Mable, Age 33. My buff girl OC

Growing up in Minneapolis Minnesota Valerie grew up to a relatively poor family who didn’t have much to their name and as a result she valued food because it was scarce. However there come a point where her family ran across a large sum of money and her life turned around instantly. No longer was food and essentials something that had to be treasured but instead it was something that she could just have whenever. That resulted in her eating a lot and gaining a lot of weight. Even though she is 6′0 she was seen as very fat, being over 350 lbs at one point in her life.

She wanted to be a lawyer, a defense attorney and ended up going to the same college that Adelina did and she considered Adelina her only friend there, and was defended against when her weight was used for bullying. Despite being roomates with Adelina the two didn’t talk as much as expected and when Valerie graduated she didn’t even get to say goodbye to her friend. She went on a mission to lose weight and ended up developing anorexia as a result and nearly dying having lost a ton of weight in such a short period of time.

Afterwards she got her life back together and devoted herself to fitness where she became the buff fitness guru that she is today. She is a defense attorney in the district of Minneapolis and holds herself in high esteem, and will put your ass to work if she feels that you need a good workout. She is open about her jealousy towards other women and seeing buff women was the reason why she became so fit in the first place.

Leiko Enomoto, Age 23, my crazy destruction filled OC

Currently going to the same college that Makoto Nijima is, she is currently working on her degree to become an architectural designer. Her goal is to create the tallest structure in the world and she already has a mockup in blender to show this design. Plus she has worked on designs for buildings like big bang burger. As a kid she was rambunctious and a hard time for her parents but she was still loved regardless. Part of this was because of her then undiagnosed ADHD.

When she was little she played around in her father’s workshop and had a hot piece of iron fall on her face and that created a permanent crescent moon shaped scar on her face. She is reckless and often gets herself injured for various reasons. Her parents were killed in a burglary gone wrong and she was sent to live with her grandparents who did their best to take care of her despite her ways. Eventually she was diagnosed with ADHD but by then she was just seen as a nuisance by a lot of people. And she played into that, cursing and swearing a lot, dying her hair multiple colors, the picture has her with rainbow colors but she also does warm and cool colors depending on her mood.

She is a tinkerer by nature, working on such things as a custom battery for a power wheels jeep, a custom vibrator (she is really open about her sexualness and is a proud bisexual, she’ll talk about using her toys out in the open) a potato cannon and a flamethrower. Her tinkering keeps her mind occupied along with the work she does in blender for buildings. She loves explosions and watches action flicks just for the destruction.

These are my OC’s that I’ve made since 2017 and I want to know if anyone is interested in me doing a blog with them! I’ve been rping with them with my SO for a long time now (Leiko is my newest) and been a really enjoyable time. If I need to I will put this in a readmore because this post is rather long. Thanks for reading if you had the attention span to do so! And please ask if you have any questions.

[carynsilver]

Favorite Fics: Darcy Edition

It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these. Things started going on that hurt my soul, and I just felt like, who cares about some fic recs when people are getting hurt? But… I don’t know. I still find solace and comfort in reading stories, even when things are hard—especially when things are hard. So, I finally felt like maybe it was time for another. If the fic writers out there are giving me escape, warm fuzzies, and enjoyment during these weird times, then they deserve some love directed back at them.

So far, I’ve listed my top 10 favorite Stucky, Drarry, and Stony fics. I love them all, but… that is a lot of dudes. I decided it was time for a little girl power in my fanfic recs. One of my favorite BAMF female characters is Darcy Lewis—one of the best and most under-rated, under-explored characters in the MCU.

I love Darcy as the every-girl who has the moxie and chutzpa to hold her own in a life full of superheroes. The girl tased the God of Thunder because he was freaking her out, for goodness sake! I love her being BFFs with Jane, being Thor’s lightening sister, and creating a found family. I love her living in the tower and caring for all the superheroes and science geniuses like they won’t care for themselves. There’s enough leeway in her backstory for fun twists, too, like being Jewish, or—one of my absolute faves—secretly being the daughter of Tony Stark.

There are a ton of good Darcy fics out there, but these are my top 10. Thank you, writers, for sharing these amazing stories with us!

Casa de Island Avengers by @inkbert

I clicked on this story because of WinterShock (Darcy/Bucky), which is a favorite ship of mine (I feel my love of Bucky has been previously discussed at length, lol), but it has become one of my favorite fics of all time. Not even just in the MCU—if I were listed my top five fanfics ever read, this one is on the list.

The concept is simple—post-Ultron, the Avengers started falling apart as a team, so Steve spearheads the effort to get them all on a two-week vacation to Tony’s private island in a last-ditch bonding effort. Every character (except Thor, but he does get some good screen time) has his or her own point of view for at least a chapter or two. Sometimes, this leads to characters sounding the same, but @inkbert really grounds each character in their own backstory and makes their inner monologues sound unique. Then, so many wacky hijinks ensue—camping, drinking, movie nights, girl bonding, sailing, pranks, and the most competitive game nights and challenges you’ve ever seen.

The ships included are Darcy/Bucky, Steve/Natasha, Pepper/Tony, and Clint/Wanda, but this story isn’t only about the ships. It’s about all these crazy characters bonding—found family at its finest. This is probably my favorite Darcy/Jane BFFs story ever, and the Bruce/Tony science bro connection is classic. The story is fully seated in cannon (up through Ultron and moving to the ccmpound), except no Clint/secret family and Pietro lives. Read it. Read it now! And if you enjoy it, there are several one-shots that follow, including a Wanda-centric one that shouldn’t be missed.

Best Supporting Soulmate by Valeris

I love a good soulmate fic, and this is an excellent one. The first thing your soulmate says to you is written on your skin, and there are both romantic and platonic soulmates. Darcy has Jane as a platonic soulmate, but it’s her other soulmate who made her life crazy before she even met them. What are you supposed to do when your soulmate’s first words to you are to let them die? 

The two primary ships in this fic are Wintershock and Stony, which work well together, but the story delves into a lot more relationships. I don’t love the whole amnesia trope in a Stucky fic because losing all that history and friendship hurts so much, but in a WinterShock fic, I have a real soft spot for Darcy being able to help post-HYDRA Bucky learn how to person again, and she does that in spades in this one. She also cultivates friendships with just about everyone in Avengers Tower and beyond. Darcy/Johnny Storm BFFs are amazing, and the deep friendship Darcy develops with Tony in this story gives me all the feels. This is a great version of BAMF Darcy who can see what the tortured characters need and is able to help them get there. And there is some interesting conflict with the Fantastic Four, as well.

This was one of the first, if not the first, WinterShock stories I ever read. I had been trying TaserHawk, but it wasn’t really my cuppa, and then somehow found this one and got hooked.

Road Trip of Champions by @leftennant

Natasha and Steve are going on a road trip. Steve wants Bucky to come with, but they feel like they need a fourth to make things even. Natasha bribes Darcy into coming with, and over the course of the trip, we get a lovely WinterShock romance. The road trip concept is fun, and Darcy and Bucky have a light enemies to friends to lovers vibe going on. Bucky is recovering, Darcy isn’t going to take anyone’s crap, and Natasha and Steve really just want a little private time along the way. And the bit at the end of the main story when they play paintball—classic and a scene that has stuck in my mind long after reading many other fics. The protective vibe Bucky has for Darcy after all this and how it even affects paintball is adorable. There are other one-shots in this ’verse as well that should not be missed. You might never think of lemons the same again.

Daybreak by @anogete

Anogete has a really good touch with snarky, caretaker Darcy. I love all her WinterShock stories, but this is the one that’s stuck with me the most. The concept of Darcy trying to help dismantle Bucky’s trigger words by creating new memories for each one was so compelling. The therapy aspect did give me pause (a personal thing; it is dealt with as respectfully as possible in the story), but it all works out in the end. The fact that I loved it so much despite a mild personal ping with the concept speaks to how well it’s written, honestly. :-) And, if this one isn’t to your taste, Anogete has plenty of great WinterShock to read, so definitely try one of them instead!

The Run ’Verse by themonkeycabal

Though it eventually becomes a WinterShock story, my favorite thing about this universe is the Tony-Stark-is-Darcy’s-father trope. This is probably my absolute favorite version of that relationship. There is also time travel, and BAMF Peggy Carter. And even though I don’t love the Darcy-becomes-a-Shield-agent thing as much as Darcy the Scientist Wrangler, this story has a great, cannon-compliant reason for why Tony, Clint, etc., weren’t able to come help Steve, Natasha, Sam, and Maria in CA:tWS. There are a ton of stories in this ’verse, and I enjoyed every single one. My favorite, though, is the one where Darcy and Tony go visit Howard’s forgotten secret bunker and have three generation’s-worth of overdue conversations.

A Morbid Taste for Ice by sitehound

This is probably my favorite TaserTricks story, though I haven’t read nearly as much Darcy/Loki as I have other Darcy ships. I think it’s because writing Loki in character and making it believable to me that Darcy would fall in love with him, especially post-Avengers 1, is a fine line. If the fic apologizes too much for Loki’s wrongdoing without enough repentance/reformation, I don’t buy that she would legit be able to fall for him, but, go too far on the redemption and Loki gets OOC.

This story hits all those beats pretty perfectly and combines them with the whole Darcy/Jane/Thor (and now Loki) found family thing, Thor/Loki brother angst, Jane/Darcy BFFs, and a really compelling murder mystery to boot. There is also an interesting subplot with Loki being what basically amounts to a magical mechanic that I found really interesting amidst the snark, romance, and mystery solving. I’m sad this writer only has the one story up because it is so good!

Bygone by @inkbert

This story is Shieldshock (Steve/Darcy), not WinterShock, so even though I do try to only choose one fic per author (mostly), I’m totally fine having two by @inkbert on this list. Besides, this fic is amazing, and it’s not like there are anyone’s rules to follow on these fic rec lists but my own, lol! This is hands down my favorite ShieldShock story ever. 

Jane’s experiment goes awry and sends Darcy into the past—specifically after Bucky left for basic but before he shipped out and Steve got tapped for Project Rebirth. Darcy ends up living with Rebecca and Mrs. Barnes, and she falls head over heels in love with tiny Steve, so much so that they get married despite not knowing what the future holds for her. Then, the night before Steve is going to report to basic, Darcy blips out again, and when she blips back in, Steve is dead. The rest of the story has Darcy blipping her way through time, making friends with Howard, Peggy, and the Howling Commandos. Ultimately, though, it’s her brother/sister relationship with Tony that is the most poignant, especially by the time they catch up to the present again. And Darcy is a complete BAMF the whole time—going on missions, learning to fly anything with wings, doing anything and everything to keep her found family together. This story also gave me a plan for what I would do if I were ever shot back into a timeline like this where I couldn’t sew or cook or make a living—become a typist… genius, Darce!

Their Hearts Said by @anogete

Another Anogete story because I just can’t resist. All her stories are really good, be they WinterShock, ShieldShock, or even her really good Loki/OC fic. I would definitely suggest giving all of them a try.

This ShieldShock story is my favorite post-Infinity War tale. It picks up a few weeks after the snap, with everyone grieving and trying to figure out what to do next. Steve is barely holding it together while the remaining Avengers try to figure out what they can do. After Jane and her family disappear, Darcy heads to Avengers Tower, hoping against hope that maybe Thor knows what’s going on. Darcy and Steve start sleeping together as more of an escape from the awfulness around them than anything else, but as the team works on a plan to save the day and bring everyone back, they develop real feelings for each other. There is also time travel and I really loved the minimalist way she wrote how the day was saved in this. It balanced well with the character stuff. This story is much preferable to End Game—too bad cannon didn’t go like this!

Good Madness by Em_Jaye

Normally, I prefer my Darcy embedded within the MCU cannon. I adore that every girl keeping up with superheroes thing. But, I do enjoy a good AU on occasion, and this is one of my faves. It’s ShieldShock and kid!fic. Darcy runs a bakery that was left to her by her mother (real You’ve Got Mail tones there, but no creepy identity porn), and Steve comes in for treats on occasion. One day, he brings his daughter, and the rest is history. I love the Steve/Darcy romance in this one, and Steve’s daughter is a sweet character. I love the Full House thing Steve has going on co-raising his daughter with Bucky and Sam. And there is a nice Bucky/Natasha subplot and some really good Tony, which I would say more about except that I don’t want to spoil the surprise. My favorite story in the series is the five rules one at the end, so definitely keep going long enough for that. And if you like Em_Jaye’s writing, you should check out The Long Way Around—a Shieldshock, time travel, Endgame fix-it WIP that is excellent, as well.

One Year by @steeleholtingon

This story is WinterShieldShock. OT3s aren’t my favorite trope, but somehow with Bucky/Darcy/Steve, it works. Maybe it’s something about the boys’ history and Darcy dragging them into the future. Kind of what she does for each of them individually in WinterShock and ShieldShock, but with even more oomph. I haven’t read the whole tag, but One Year is my favorite.

Bucky’s Winter Soldier recovery has pushed both Steve and Bucky to the edge. Steve ends up leaving (at Bucky’s demand, but also because the team is afraid he’s going to do some kind of suicide via superhero duty if he doesn’t get his head on straight). The wrinkle—the night before he left, Darcy and Steve had a comforting one-night stand that resulted in two pinks lines on the test. The resulting story takes place one month at a time. Steve tries to piece himself back together and put his feelings for Bucky in the past whilst falling for Darcy over text messages. Bucky, on the other hand, realizes how he fucked it all up and vows to be there for Darcy and Steve’s baby while Steve is gone. Darcy navigates the waters of an unplanned (but wanted) pregnancy while balancing her feelings for both of them. And all the rest of the Avengers, science crew, and other Avengers-adjacent peeps support all three of them through it all. Angst, recovery, and a happy ending. So good!

So, after all that, what are you guys waiting for? Get to reading all this Darcy goodness! :-)

And now I need to figure out what fic rec list to work on next. I have a Stranger Things one (Harringrove and Mileven) almost ready to go, and then I need to decide what to do with the ships and characters that I don’t have a full top ten for. Group them together, perhaps? Bughead and LoVe might be a good combination, lol. And WinterHawk and WinterIron.

[ambitionsource]

Who in the a class is in some kind of therapy?

what a question LMAO. but honestly, a very fair one indeed. while discussing this, es and i ended up basically dividing it into three groups (if someone isn’t mentioned, it just means none apply)

Is In Therapy Currently

Isadora || as we know from the canon of S3, isa is currently in therapy to work through the grief of valerie dying as well as like... the built up abandonment issues, anxiety, and struggles she has articulating or processing emotions lmao. it also helps her learn better methods to work with her autism

Farkle || i mean... we all watched S1 & 2. we know why he’s there LMAO and by god does he need it. it’s good that he’s improving though!!

Chai || she officially started therapy after the events of S1 while she was abroad because evidently her parents divorce really fucked with her emotional state and coping mechanisms -- as well as having sort of emotionally distant parents and having to navigate the world on her own. basically, money =/= nurturing. but yeah i think she realized what she did with tormenting her classmates wasn’t Healthy perhaps and so she sought out the resources to fix it on her own. her parents certainly weren’t going to be much help

Clarissa || clarissa has been in and out of therapy here and there since she was little, mainly for managing OCD. usually she’s fine and her appointments are infrequent (monthly at this current rate), but she tends to go back to her therapist when circumstances get very stressful, like the events of S2 (she mentions going back to therapy in a scene with charlie and haley in 210)

Not In Therapy Currently, but Has Before

Riley || though not by choice, riley went to therapy for a stretch of time in the aftermath of her bullying experience freshman year. by the start of S1, though, she’s on the tail-end of it after a whole summer full of it. she also had stints in family therapy when she was little when cory and topie were having their first bouts of marriage problems, but she doesn’t remember all that obviously. she’s thought about going back for herself because of all the divorce strain, but ultimately opted against it bc she didn’t want to go through cory or topanga. she mainly sticks to talking to eric if things get too overwhelming and using the coping mechanisms she already has

Darby || miss darbs spent some time in therapy in late elementary school due to having issues socializing with her peers. i think she’s always been a bit awkward and desperate to please, so that can get messy with kids cause kids are mean. she was also definitely bullied at that age for being really tall and so i think her parents put her therapy out of genuine concern just with the hopes that like, she’d be able to develop some coping mechanisms and have a safe space to get advice if they didn’t have the answers. and in some ways it helped, other ways no -- her friendships aren’t the healthiest still (as she’s the doormat), but i think she holds her own BETTER with the plastics having gone to therapy than if she never developed those emotional tools at all

Has Not / Is Not but Really Fucking Should Be in Therapy

LUCAS || this is like the most obvious blinking lights sirens wailing example ever. he is a walking textbook for endorsing therapy. between the domestic abuse, mommy and daddy issues, self-esteem in the subbasement, lack of life purpose, inability to read others well emotionally, inability to process his own emotions, the physical aversion due to his trauma, his kleptomania, his risk-taking behavior, his habit of lying, the fact that he has canonically walked off for days at a time with no warning, explanation, or safety net, that he sleeps in a fucking technician’s booth, he used to free-climb buildings SOMETIMES IN THE RAIN, no sense of self-preservation, intrusive thoughts, inability to express appreciation or affection in a normal non-stressful way...... this man is a therapist’s dream and nightmare. they could spend YEARS unpacking him. but will he ever go to therapy? no. because he a) doesn’t think he needs it, b) can’t ask for help ever, and c) could never afford it. and at this point, d) if his dad heard he was seeking help like that he would shut it down instantly. anyway, he’s the biggest case here. underline him in red

Charlie || charlie is a great example of someone who is like coping... sort of... not really... it Looks like they’re coping but they aren’t really and they really need help. like yes, charlie has stability in certain areas of his life that others don’t, and he’s extremely self-aware of his privileges, but i think that’s part of the problem. he’s convinced himself he doesn’t need or shouldn’t get external help because there are people who have it so much worse than him and he doesn’t... he doesn’t really need it, does he? he’s fine. he’ll be fine. and even if he did think about getting “help,” i think his first instinct -- and advice from others -- would be to go to his church leadership, which is not a suggestion made with ill will but just isn’t helpful considering half of his trauma is tied to his relationship with god and the church and faith. he needs a more objective space to unpack all of that, and obviously church itself is not the answer. i think that charlie will be able to work through a lot of his initial issues on his own with time and patience with himself (something we’re in the thick of right now -- we’re just barely in the acceptance phase), but he should really go to therapy in the future just to like... work through all of the long-term trauma he endured from his upbringing and bridgette’s exile and the dueling psychology of church vs sexuality. like... that’s gonna take some time to unravel and he needs to be in the right place to pursue that on his own. will he, i dont know, but i think when he does a certain heaviness he’s been carrying his entire life will finally like... lift. and he’ll be able to breathe better

Asher || so asher is a bit of a clusterfuck LMAO like he’s diagnosed officially with generalized anxiety disorder but he never saw a specialist, his mom diagnosed him since she’s a psychologist. the complexity here is that because of that... well, they say you should never let family be your personal doctors and i think that’s true for mental health professionals too. like emily basically gave asher the generic coping rundown when he was really young, and then he went on to develop his own coping mechanisms with, at least, a very fundamental understanding of what’s wrong with him. but he kind of developed his own complex about it all too, bc i think emily took pride in him being able to figure it all out and be so capable with his own mental health without ever going to therapy and he kind of internalized that, as well as having internalized a lot his mom’s perspectives and opinions as a mental health professional in a way that its like... well my MOM said that, so i feel kind of some type of way about it. so its all really complicated and twisted in his head and he just doesnt bother to unpack it (something, ironically, therapy would probably help lol). the thing about asher is that for all intents and purposes, he does cope well and he is really in tune with his own mental state. it’s just that he could seriously benefit from having an objective party help him untangle some of his neuroses i think and it would take some of the constant stress off his shoulders, but he’s honestly too stuck in his ways at this point to go. that being said, he’s a vocal advocate for therapy and its benefits -- just not for himself

Nigel || as discussed a bit in the ask i answered about him, i just think nigel carries way too much pressure on himself and he could benefit from someone helping him work through things instead of carrying all his stress on his own -- even if its less complex than some others. he’s like same range as clarissa.

Maya || maya has no issue with self-esteem, but i think she could still benefit from someone helping her actually unpack her issues over her dad and why she is the way she is. a therapist who specializes in narcissism would be a good fit for her -- not because she is one, but she does have... certain quirks where i think having that specialization can help unravel her motivations and actions a little more easily

Missy || she’s just a fucking mess. she shouldn’t be redeemed but i think therapy could really do her a favor and maybe make her less terrible and psychopathic towards people who aren’t like her. maybe

-- Maggie & Es

[oh-theatre]

Objection!: Chapter 29

Chapter title: Staring Into Hell

A/n: Ew EW EW EW I HATE THIS I HATE MY WORK I HATE EVERYTHING WHY ARE YOU STILL READ AAAA BLEH! ANyway heres a new chapter, hope you enjoy I guess anD PLEASE LEAVE ME COMMENTS

First | Previous | Next

words: 2224

summary: With Logans remaining anger, they all just try to get through the days

pairings: Eventual logicality, prinxiety, platonic demus, romantic remile

warnings: Murder mention, child murder, Law and Courtroom, swearing, blood, hospital, crime scene,  murder, gun mention, guns, swearing abuse, graphic descriptions, alcohol, shooting, crying

Ao3 Link  

“A wheelchair?” Logan baffles, he doesn't understand but Patton does. His mind already races quickly and goes over everything he’ll need to adjust for his lifestyle. He can hear Logan shooting questions towards the doctor but he can't focus on the deep set panic. How will he make his commute, take his children to school, oh my how may he present himself in court? “I simply do not understand doctor” Logan finishes

“I know its a difficult situation but it seems as though his injuries could worsen if we allow him to return to his normal life instantly it could have detrimental effects” He explains, Patton takes Logan's hand comfortingly, kissing it sweetly.”This is a precaution of the most vital need, he will attend physical therapy and we will make sure he is in top shape.” Logan huffs, a disappointed scowl. Patton gives an apologetic look to the doctor, he takes his cue. “Ill leave you two to discuss”

“Lo..” Patton ushers, Logan sits himself on the bed, in front of Patton. “I want to be able to hold my kids, I want to walk through the courtroom, I want to be able to…” He feels the ring around his finger, Logan had returned it almost as soon as Patton had awakened. “I want to be able to walk down the aisle” He smiles. Logan chuckles, though still restrained he understood.

“Alright...Alright” He nods, Patton gives him a grin. His hand places itself carefully on the lawyer's chest as Logan pulls him in for a kiss. “Now to more grim matters…” He proposes, Patton sighs averting his eyes. The room had been severely decorated by Emile. Who wanted nothing more than the father to feel at home. At his bedside table were three framed photos. The first was of Patton and the children on the day of their adoption, he held the twins with vibrant tears in his eyes. The second was of Patton and Logan, a photographer had taken it while the pair had danced at the gala. The third however, he wished for it to be taken away, Virgil and him smiling exhausted as their children climbed them happily. That used to be his most treasured photo….

Used to be

Now the sight of Virgil conjured the worst of stomachaches and the most confusion. He shook it out of his head allowing Logan to kiss him on his forehead but he kept facing away.

“We will discuss it at a later time” Logan allows, Patton nods feeling his eyes grow heavy with exhaustion, listening to Logan's farewell. “I'm going to go and get you some food”

“Jamahl!” Patton yells, he serves the children already sitting at the table, happily bouncing for breakfast. Terrance flaps excited as Remus and Valerie chow down quickly. Patton huffs rubbing his hands on his apron. “Jamahl breakfast! Lets go!” Patton attempts again, Logan chuckles coyly taking Patton in for a gentle kiss on his cheek.

“Good morning busy bees” Logan greets, a kiss to each of their foreheads. Patton cleans, finally the kitchen looks untouched. And yet as Logan reads his paper, the children discuss in chatters, one piece is missing. Patton taps annoyed, he checks his watch once more. “Something bothering you love?” Logan inquires, washing away his cup.

“I have to get the children to school, Terrence to daycare and I have a court case” Patton lists, he looks to the stairs that lead up. “Jamahl!” He calls again, Logan takes him from behind, leaning his head on his husband's shoulder. “What on earth is he up to?” The clock buzzes giving neither time to answer. “Crap I've gotta go”

“I'll get him to school, you take the three musketeers,” Logan promises, his hand moving down Patton's arm while his pinky interlaces itself with Pattons. A quick squeeze before a blushed Patton rushes to get the children on their way.

“Wakey wakey Patton” A cold voice shivered down Patton's already sweaty back. He yawns sitting up, rubbing his blurred vision as he reaches for his glasses. Soon enough his blinking pays and he wishes it had not. “Feeling better cupcake?”

“Feel like i'm going to vomit” Patton replies, a scowl returns to his face. Liam smirks taking a spot at the end of the bed. “Why are you here?” He asks for what seems the millionth time. Liam inches closer, and for a moment Patton can just seem himself return to his sinking self. Liam could take his cheeks right now and Patton fears his own control. Thank god for his fiancee

What a stranger idea

Fiancee

He couldn't help but blush

“Liam, I'm going to give a single millisecond to remove yourself from the premises” Logan announces, Patton bites his lower lip. Liam nods but stands. “Go on now, coward”

“Actually I dont think I want to” Liam chuckles, Patton swears things moved too quickly. Logan grabs his collar, delicately but hes pinned now on the wall. “What the hell! Get off of me!”

Huh

Weird

That was Patton's line

“Get out and leave Patton and his childr-”

“Our!” Patton corrects “Our children” he smiles, Logan refuses the intense urge to grin but nods.

”-Our children alone” He makes the change, proudly. Liam groans, finally getting the clearly superior man off of him. He gives Patton one more glare before disappearing. Logan wipes his hands, sanitizing. Patton falls back on his pillow laughing. “What? I don't like him” Logan sits.

“You and me both dearest” Patton sighs, he stretches his arms gladly taking Logans water. “Hey” His tone softens, he reaches for Logans more than ready hand. “I want kids” He admits, Logan retracts, sucking in.

“I hate to inform you but you already do” Logan teases “Two in fact” Patton turns to his shoulder laughing, Logan would never get tired of that. Patton tugged carefully, Logan takes his lay next to him. He wraps him up, they lounge comfortably.

“I want more” He finds Logans fingers, interlacing them carefully. “With you” He requests, Logan lets out a sweet breath, kissing gently on the nape of Patton's neck. “I know we have the twins, and I love them more than anything, but I want more kids...i want a-”

“Family” Logan completes

~~~

“Talk to me Logan!” Virgil grabs the lawyers arms, the fuming rage he faces terrifies him. “Please just let me explain”

“You dont get it do you? There is no explanation” Logan faces him. “Thats it, nothing is justifiable ok?”

“It was for Damian! I had just gotten him, I was young and stupid and wanted to make sure my kid was ok! I have never felt so much shame in my life but I needed it” Virgil rushes, Logan keeps his face cold but he knows in a heartbeat Patton would figure Virgil.

“And Remy?” But before Virgil can answer his face resolves “Emiles surgery…” Virgil nods, shuffling his feet on the ground. “Still, you shouldn't have taken the money, there were other ways...other solutions. You're just lucky that Patton was able to get out of that situation.” Logan tries his hardest to remain calm, his breath quivers but he musnt. “But what would have happened if Patton had not, if he had stayed?”

“I know that! Look, don't tell Patton, I need him to forgive me in his own time...I don't want him to know why...he's too forgiving and he has every right to be upset but I needed you to understand” Logan nods, he still has his duvidas. “But Logan....why do you care so much if we took the money?”

“Because I didn't Virgil” Logan reveals, the detective's heart drops. Of course it was a stupid question in the first place, it was Patton, it was a bribe. “I had a case, we had a case. We could have gotten him out of there. But then strangely two of my testimonies dropped out”  Logan shook his hand, grunting. “I don't want to talk about this, or talk to you, or anything” He takes his coffees disappearing behind Patton's room. “Hey”

“Hi!” Patton smiles, the twins giggle from their hiding spot. Logan keeps his eyes forward however, as if nothing was heard. “I can't seem to find the twins, would you care to help me my love?” Logan breaths, a cheeky smirk .

“I suppose I can, I wouldn't want our children to disappear” He laments, soon the door opens and they both rush into Logan's arms.

“No dada!” They cry, he kneels hugging them tight. Patton watches from his bed, his heart couldn't comprehend this. Was this real? Logan carries the kids to the bed, all four of them. A happy family...their happy family. His…

“You alright honeybee?” Logan whispers as the twins focus their energy on the tv. Patton nods, cradling himself into Logan's chest, the twins following into their fathers. “You look sad”

“No no...far from it” He promises, kissing Logan. “Are you? I heard some frustrated voices outside” Patton fiddles with Valerie's hair, braiding it gently. “Sounded like Virgil…”

“Not right now Pat” Logan assures “We are here, together and…” He falters, Patton turns him. He wipes away the newly freshened tears. “I apologize Patton, it seems I am overwhelmed at the moment” Logan admits, Patton purses his lip struggling to reach the tissues. “I love you”

“And I you”

~~~

“Alright shithead, fucker, pile of trash-”

“Virgil” Remy kicks him under the table, the detective glares. “Liam” Remy seethes. “You want to tell me where you were approximately an hour after the situation was diffused?”

“I was behind the barricade, the doctors were checking me” Liam concludes, Virgil kicks the chair. He knows as soon as he checks with the emergency response team, Liam would be on their record. He may be a flaming pile of trash but he isn't a killer.

“You're free to go” Virgil bites his lip, feeling his skin almost chew off.

“And I didnt even have to pay you this time” Liam snarls, Remy holds Virgil back while Liam makes his way out.

“Argh!” Virgil pounds, Remy signals for the rest of the team to leave from behind their one way mirror. “I'm so sick of him beating us! Always beating the goddamn system!” Virgil huffs, Remy's hand placed on his back for support. “I shouldnt have done it, we shouldnt have taken the fucking money Remy”

“I know...I know..I know I know-”

“Stop it!” Virgil slaps the table “Just...I have to go”  Virgil grunts.

“Patton?” Virgil knocks “Pat? Ready to-” Virgil pauses listening to the grunts

“Shut it or ill stuff-” The voice pauses “Whos there?” The detective recognizes the disgusting voice of the slimy intoxicating man. Liam.

“Its Virgil, Pat and I have a lunch date” He knocks once more, quiet but annoyed shuffling can be heard before the door opens up. Patton whimpers on the couch, his beagle Molly comforting him, the twins safely away at his sisters. “Are you ready to go?” He addresses. The lawyer coughs, clearly wiping something away from his face. He stands, plastering a fake smile. Virgil sees the bruise, he sees it and he goes towards Liam as Patton gets into his car. “WHat the hell did you do?” He accuses

“Now now detective, remember that information is not for you...not anymore” His sly smile turns Virgil's stomach. “If I do recall, a hundred grand being placed in yours and detective Nyx’s name sealed that”

For damian

For damian

For me…

He felt sick

~~~

“You're not giving me much choice” Roman sighs,Logan smirks, rolling his eyes. The pair make their way from the cafeteria, holding three trays of food. Logans, Romans and of course Pattons. The breeze was chilly as the doors would swirl open every now and then. Roman enjoyed this moment, right now, everything was fine. Everything was ok.

“You alright?” Logan asks, turning the corner, he smiles politely to the nurses and doctors who rush by.

“I'm doing alright for myself specs” Roman catches himself in the bliss. James, Patton, his job, his friends...everything was alright. Pattons room was just up ahead, he could make out two figures. James must have beaten them to it. His phone buzzes in his coat, he holds them up for a moment. “Roman Reial!”

“Ro?” It was soft, almost a squeak but he knew who was on the other line. Virgil.

“What is it?” He felt commanding, a fierce tone as he demands an answer. He could hear the sniffles, the desperation and he softened. “Virge?” He whispered.

“I...I need to talk to you please” He begs, Roman could feel the heat rise. Logan furrows his brows but allows them to continue the conversation. “Just later? A-at some point?”

“Sure, yeah, of course” He rushes, the phone falls into his pocket. Had he hung up? Thank god he hadn't. They approach the door, swinging it open with charm. “Alright we hav-” His heart fell flat, the scene couldn't have played out like this. “James” Roman barely breathes

“That does appear to be my name” The judge says, Logans lips tremble angrily

“And you do appear to be pointing a gun at my fiance” Logan growls

“Well he just won't die” James claims, a quick click.

The safety's off

[nostalgic-pancakes]

Room 73- Chapter 3/8

The ghost is spoken to, but we also see more character trauma. (at least Virgil and Logan are having an okay time)

Pairings: Implied Thomas/OC, implied sibling-y c!Terrence and c!Valerie, sibling-y Analogical, Creativitwins and Moceit, platonic DLAMPR (soon to have a T in it!), and Romantic husbands Remile! (Also married parents but they don’t have names yet)

Read on AO3!

Word count: 2217

Warnings: References to shifty parenting, unhealthy relationships with food, depression, and of course, the general angst that comes with being yanno... dead for about a century with implications of period-typical sexism and the fallout that death has on your loved ones. Stay safe!

Other notes: Hi! I know this is sooner than usual (and also a bit shorter than usual) but I really wanted to get this out early, because there's two other things I'm working on! A c!Thomas-centric number+1 with friends and side interactions, and a Cartoon Therapy oneshot collection (with only cartoon therapy characters! no sides!) that has found family, Dot and Larry VS the internet, and everyone punting mitchell in the face because he deserves it. You can vote for which one you'd like to see posted FIRST on here! 

Now, sorry for that wall of text- here’s the chapter!

——————————————————————————–

Thomas didn’t have anything even remotely resembling a clue as to how he just did that. He hasn’t been able to so much as move for decades, now. Almost a century!

(The only reason he still knows the time is because classrooms date the boards. Everett is 96, Val 95, Terrence 87. )

But somehow, somehow these highschool kids around Thomas’s (? do ghost years count?) age managed to hear him hiss, and now he can talk to them.

In the words of that one kid here in the fifties who was usually half seas over, “ fucking shit!”

The one with the glasses (Logan? Or was it Nico? Naw, Logan.) is still tapping on the funny small glowing box. A phone, or something. (It looks too small to be a telephone, and it has no wires, but the future is pretty crazy!) and the other one, Janus is looking at the space that he inhabits like it’s on fire. Whatever else is happening today is happening, but the corner that Thomas lives in is definitely not on fire, that’s for sure.

Janus begins to step forward a bit, towards Thomas (!!!), and attempts to touch him. His hand goes through, like most things do (bar the occasional stray acid droplet, but they don’t burn anymore) and he pulls it back slowly.

Logan clears his throat, looking up from his ‘phone’ and at Thomas.

“Hello.” he says cautiously, not daring to hope. But Thomas can’t get the words out anymore, it’s like the single work took too much out of him to say it back. So he tries hissing in the morse code that Daddy taught him and (and he taught Val, because she’s amazing, woman or not) hoping, hoping they’d figure it out.

.... .. (hi)

Janus looks confused, but Logan lights up immediately, tapping frantically on his ‘phone’, until it shows something with morse code translations written on it.

“Could you possibly repeat that?” asks Logan, and he’s beaming, and that face is now one of the nicest faces he’s seen since he died. So Thomas tries again. It saps a little energy out of him, but not enough to really be an issue. Not like talking.

“Hello there, uh… do you have a name?”

- .... --- -- .- ... (Thomas)

“Thomas. That’s a nice name. Is it alright if we ask what year you ar- were from?” That question was unexpected, but one Thomas was willing to answer.

.---- ----. ..--- --... (1927)

“Nineteen twenty-seven”. Huh. Wasn’t this part of town a boy’s military school at some point back then?” asks Logan, and Thomas hisses again to signify the yes. He was a student there, under Pop’s behest, while Val stayed home to get ready for being married, even though she was all of eight years old and barely old enough to start her midwife training with basic first aid.

He wonders if she ever got to join the Red Cross like she’d dreamed to do. He hopes so.

Logan’s still asking questions, but Thomas is getting tired again, and the extra clarity letting him reminisce about his family is not helping at all. He makes a series of somewhat weaker clicks, trying to convey he’s tired, and Janus seems to pick up on it, patting Logan on the shoulder and motioning at the door for them to leave, citing a ‘Virgil and Patton’ (brothers?) as a reason to go soon, anyways. Logan huffs a bit, though clearly as a jest, and they say their goodbyes, probaby, based on their hand movements, but by now, Thomas has faded enough to lose a bit of track.

…

“Hey, Val.”

'___'

“Yeah, this is a gravestone. Didn’t expect you to reply. Well, I was always the talkative one before,a dn I can do it again.”

'___'

“So uh, Hey! It’s me again, Terrence, coming with the daisies as usual. I can’t believe that it’s me doing this, ya doof. It was supposed to be you, Val.”

'___'

“Yeah, I guess I should go back soon. Everett’s cold isn’t getting better, nor worse. I wonder what you’d do.”

'___'

“Yes, love you too. I hope you, Barry and Linda are doing alright up there. We’ll… probably see you soon anyways.”

'___'

“Hey- tell Thomas we said hello, and that we still miss him. All the time. Eighty years should be long enough, but it really isn’t, is it?”

(Tommy isn’t here.) …

“Okay, so you’re saying that the ghost, a literal ass ghost--”

“Language!” chirped Patton. It was starting to become routine. “Sorry Pat but okay, so a ghost talked to you over morse code??!!” Exclaimed Virgil, his tone getting more and more excited by the syllable.

“Yes, I literally just said that Virgil.” huffs Logan, pressing his knuckles to his temple. He loves his twin, but times like this really test his (already dwindling) patience with shenanigans.

“Okay, so what did he tell you??” asks Virgil, looking almost starry-eyes with the sheer level of excitement. It’s been a while since Virgil was this excited about something.

Logan clears his throat and taps Janus’s shoulder, taking him away from something he was talking about with Patton, which was involving hushed voices of some sort. Janus extracts the notebook from one of the many, many button-up pockets in his cloak (Patton is good at economical design, whie Janus handles the drama), after scrambling around for a few seconds trying to locate first the book, then the page, handing it to him very quickly before jumping right back into his conversation with Patton. Logan is mildly perturbed by this action, but tries to ‘roll with it’, as Roman would say if he took the bus.

“His name is Thomas, or at least we’re relatively sure that he’s a he, and he died in nineteen-twenty-seven. He was a student here back when the plot of land that is now Haley-Dove lower and upper secondary was a boy’s military school. He began to exhaust himself around here, so we dropped the questions.” Virgil nods, perusing the notes, scribbly as they are that Logan’s made as if they were a short story written by an author he really respects, like Leigh Bardugo, possibly. It makes Logan oddly happy to think about it that way. Virgil’s eyes keep widening over the course of his reading, to levels that are almost comical. Janus and Patton’s conversation has gotten a bit louder, but not enough to hear, still. At the moment, he can’t really bring himself to care. In the end, the bus stops before Virgil can finish reading, so Logan gives him the navy-covered notebook to keep for now and return for dinner, with the instruction to add in his own commentary and ideas on a different page.

Patton and Janus leave the bus last out of everyone, looking rather perturbed and avoiding each other’s gaze, though they’re still clutching each other’s hands tightly. Logan will likely ask what happened on Monday. For now, Amma is at the bus stop, waving at them. She’s the only Indian woman on the stop, so, decently easy to see. Amma picks up Logan’s bag, even though he’s insisted for years that he’s “adjusted accordingly for years, and does not require any assistance!”. Amma usually just retaliates that he shouldn’t need to get used to something with a rather strange expression, but he’s digressing now.

(She started saying it after middle school, and everything that happened there.)

“Hi!” she exclaims, while taking Logan’s bag. Virgil just has his laptop bag and notebook, with his headphones around his neck. They both smile the same.

“Hey, Amma. How’re you doing?” Practiced. Synced. It works every time, as Amma’s grin gets even wider, causing Virgil to start stimming with his ring and Logan to start flapping his own hands.

“Sooo- how’s your day? I see Logan’s notebook with you, V!”

“It’s for a…” Virgil looks at Logan, quietly betraying the fact that he has no clue what to say. Logan indicates to the lizard along the cobblestone path, and his twin’s expression changes into dawning comprehension, as he quickly finishes his sentence.

“It’s for a report on Lizards, Amma, that I’m doing with Remus. You know, Roman’s brother?” she nods, and then smirks.

“Oh, you mean the boy you have a cruuuuuusssshhhh on?” she teases, and Virgil goes red immediately, batting her hand away from his hair, where she was ruffling it.

Wait- how did Virgil have a crush on Roman? They had been friends for all of two weeks, and did not display any crush-like symptoms such as reddening of face, gushing about the crush for hours or purposely trying to get into more situations with the crush, or even doing simple things like taking an obnoxiously long time on singular texts. To his relief, Virgil shakes his head.

“No, it’s not a crush. He’s a good friend, but no.” he says, a bit more seriously, but not dismissively. To Logan, because Logan can hear those things, he says “Not yet.” Logan does not bring it up yet, because it feels like Virgil might need some process time for that, and besides, they share a room. Logan can grill him later, when Virgil is willing to be teased lightly. Or well, he hopes he’s light enough.

…

Mom and Dad are fighting again.

It’s not like the walls are soundproof, no matter what they seem to think. The argument is pretty typical. Small issue begins with civil conversation, becomes slight aggression as two very different people are unable to see eye to eye, and then someone in the middle of a bout of particularly aggressive mood makes an attack on personality, and then it’s all ‘fuck off’’s and crying.

Yeah. it’s a thing. But Remus and Roman know what to do- it’s the fight law. Headphones on, loud playlist on, door shut and internet in full use to avoid the fact that their parents are incapable of shutting the fuck up. This is fine.

Actually no, that’s what Roman says, but Remus knows it isn’t. Roman’s just too scared of conflict by now to bring it up. And who’s fault might that be, huh? (okay, so maybe Remus is a bit resentful.)

Whatever. It’s not like they’ll stop if he and Roman tell them. They’ve tried before.

The problem is that they’re good people. And parents. They definitely try to be the best parents possible. But Remus (unlike Roman) has never had the illusion that his parents are gods, only to have that slowly broken down over time to see his parents as people. They’ve always been people to him- people who try their hardest, but also fall flat in other areas, areas that also happen to be important.

But he should probably make his way to the kitchen to make some fruit salad. Roman probably isn’t going to eat anything else tonight, with how he seems to be doing. Otherwise, those stomach acids are going to gargle and gurgle till they consume his stomach whole! (it doesn’t feel fun to imagine that, so he stops)

(he’s so angry that those idiots thought it was a fucking joke. It’s something he and Virgil agree on, for sure.)

And if Remus tears the granola packet wrapper a little too harshly? Well, it’s not like anyone’s going to hear it at this rate.

…

Patton and Janus aren’t talking to each other, which is probably the one thing he never expected from them.

But they aren’t, and it’s becoming more concerning by the hour. They’re still hanging out together, currently working on one of their sewing projects- embroidering a hoodie in protection sigils as a paid commission for the witch’s girl, and they seem okay in each other’s presence, but they aren’t talking to each other. Just making overly meaningful eye contact, and looking away as quickly as they met eyes.

Patton in particular seems to be pretty upset, as a marked difference from his usual demeanor. He’s pricking his fingers left and right, something that never usually happens, choosing to hand stitch rather than go ahead with the sewing machine that he got for christmas, which was being used by Janus for the moment. In fact, Emile was about to get him some bandaids when he overheard them speak to each other for the first time since they got back.

“Pat, you can’t keep it in forever. You can't. It’ll kill you.”

Patton isn’t replying.

“It almost killed me, Pat please, please just… say something.” Patton does say something after that, but Emile can’t hear it, and he doesn’t feel like it’s something he’s meant to hear anyway. Janus lightens up after that, and Patton starts talking again, monosyllabically and softly, but Janus seems so relieved, that that must be a good thing.

Emile goes, heart heavy, and decides to speak with Remy about the best ways to show that they’re there for Janus and Patton. They’ve only been living with him for a few months, but they feel like their kids, and Emile (and definitely Remy- he’s the ultimate parent-friend) wants the best for them, and for them to be happy. They didn’t deserve the lot they got.

Hopefully, he and Remy can prove that yes, some things are

[eoleolhan-a]

I am STILL on my MonProm bullshit bc I’m grinding through Monster Camp so let’s do some more headcanons! This time it’s gonna be Jin’s opinions on the some of the more prominent characters from the two games, and what I think their relationships (platonic or otherwise) could be like. Obviously these are just my opinions, anyone who has any of these muses is free to disagree, ofc. I won’t include player characters (yet, maybe once Reverse comes out I will update) since the PC personality is kind of fluid to interpretation and change based on the player. There are spoilers for both Monster Prom and Monster Camp regarding main and side characters.

This is in alphabetical order just to make it easy to navigate.

Aaravi

He doesn’t trust her, straight up. She’s a monster slayer with a history of targeting demons and even with her therapy and growth in Monster Camp he’s wary. He’s worried she would turn on him and try to slay him too. He steers clear when possible but could learn to trust her if he could see her progress with monsterkind more directly.

Batniss

He really doesn’t know what she’s talking about most of the time. The main character thing is weird to him, but at least she’s interesting. He respects her combat skills and her archery prowess.

Calculester

He thinks Cal is cute, in the way someone thinks a puppy is cute. He’s just so clueless sometimes it’s endearing, like watching a baby giraffe take its first steps. On the other hand, though, something about this sentient computer robot is a bit uncanny. Since Cal is generally so nice, though, he tries not to let the whole “potential robot uprising/singularity” thing bother him.

Dahlia

He has absolutely no interest in being anywhere near Dahlia because of her reputation as a warmonger. He thinks she’s dangerous and doesn’t want to risk being the one who gives her the idea to try and invade the 2nd Circle. He absolutely doesn’t trust her, and is honestly a bit afraid of her. If he were able to give her a chance (ie probably forced to do school or camp things with her, or if they had mutual friends for some reason) he could grow to appreciate her determination and at times enjoy her exuberant personality. She has the capability to grow on him if given the chance.

Damien

Similar to Dahlia, he distrusts Damien. He knows of the LaVeys, and as mentioned in my big ol 2nd Circle/Cubi lore post sees their whole “we made love popular” reputation as a bit unearned (because I’m sorta canon divergent, but see that post for the details of that). He also doesn’t want anyone from the 8th Circle’s royal family to get anywhere near the 2nd Circle lest they try to take that over, too. He would also probably resent having to go to school or camp with a prince from Hell juuuust a bit, especially since Damien is considered one of the coolest/most well known students/campers. He would be envious of Damien’s wealth and status since that’s something he lacks, which colours Jin’s perception of him. He doesn’t know about Damien’s softer side, so he sees him as abrasive, dangerous, and annoying. Like Dahlia, if he were to give him a chance though he’d grow to like him, especially his fondness for hairstyling and makeup since Jin enjoys the latter (and being fashionable in general). He does, however, reluctantly admit that Damien is indeed hot even if he is an annoying LaVey baby.

Dmitri

Jin doesn’t really know Dmitri but he knows of him. He doesn’t really care about whatever the Coven is doing, but hey at least Dmitri is a hot vampire who never seems to wear a shirt. He doesn’t mind seeing him hanging around because he’s easy on the eyes. Jin would probably find his dramatic villain monologuing and cape swishing a bit funny.

Faith

Out of the Coven members he would probably like Faith the most. She seems pretty relaxed and chill, and he would respect her intelligence and skill as a witch. In general he appreciates the Coven’s colour scheme and fashion sense, though.

Hex

He thinks Hex is straight up irritating but if he was high then he’d probably like their company more.

Hope

His feelings towards Hope are similar to Faith. He isn’t all that bothered with their Coven shenanigans but does respect them. He would be confused by all of the Hope reincarnations but he doesn’t have much of a problem with her. She seems nice enough.

Interdimensional Prince

Although he can be kind of weird at times (maybe even a bit creepy) Jin has to admit the idea of being whisked off to another dimension by some handsome anime-alien-looking prince is kind of appealing. He would like the attention and ego-boost it would cause if the Prince ever flirted with him.

Joy

Jin would enjoy her company. They’d probably get along, but he does find her “main character saving the world” thing to be a bit Intense at times. Despite that he think’s she’s smart and cool and likes being around her, especially given how wild some of their classmates/campmates can be.

Kale

They smoke weed together and vibe. That’s all. 10/10.

Leonard

Jin wants to kick him in the face so hard that he flies into the sun. -10/10.

Liam

Usually he likes Liam and likes being around him. He appreciates his creativity and sense of taste, but sometimes Liam can be a bit pretentious and annoying. That’s fairly manageable though, and sometimes he’s quite the breath of fresh air compared to some of the more exuberant characters he encounters. Jin would especially enjoy indulging in fancy, rare artsy gourmet food so Liam could take pictures of it and he could eat it.

Milo

Out of everyone, Jin is fondest of Milo. Their sense of style, taste (wine and cheese platters? yes please), flirtatious streak (and not to mention good looks) would have Jin swooning. He would also find their personality a lot more calm in comparison to some of the other monsters at camp. The only annoyance would be Milo’s constant attachment to their phone and their somewhat self-centred nature. It takes attention away from Jin, after all. Competing egos.

Miranda

Jin likes Miranda most of the time. Sometimes he thinks her royal merfolk ways are a bit confusing, and he is a bit distrustful of foreign royalty in general but less so of Miranda; he doesn’t see any reason why the Merkingdom would attack the Cubi or really have much to do with them at all, but he knows that royal life can be vicious. He does find it interesting to hear about the culture and society of the Merkingdom, though. He also appreciates her manners and poise. Plus, they’re both pink so he’s a bit biased in that regard. Sometimes he does find the more murderous aspects of the Merkingdom a bit unsightly, and it can be a little frustrating at times trying to explain commoner things to her. He doesn’t like that he would sometimes feel a bit condescended or spoken down to by her, but sometimes this has more to do with his perception than anything she would be saying or doing.

Morty

He likes looking at Morty but his personality is a bit too self absorbed and intense even for Jin. Still, he appreciates the confidence and the sex positive energy. Sexual tension always makes rivalries better so Morty is a perfect candidate for Camp Rival Camp in Jin’s opinion and his presence is at least entertaining and engaging. Also he quite likes the heart-hole shorts, a bold fashion statement.

Polly

Polly is fun to be around. She can be boisterous, but at least she knows how to have a good time. Jin also likes that she isn’t bloodthirsty or a war criminal or something, so in theory they could just hang out like normal monsters/people. It doesn’t hurt that she can get good drugs, too. 

Scott

Scott is a himbo, Jin likes himbos. Case closed. In all seriousness, he would find Scott endearing because of his good nature and cheerful personality. Sometimes his airheaded antics can be a bit annoying, but he knows Scott means well. Jin thinks Scott would be a good friend because he seems honest, loyal, and kind. Those are also qualities that would make him a good date, plus he’s a big cute wolfman who Jin wants to pet in more ways than one.

Valerie

He respects the hustle and the on campus hook-up for all sorts of oddities. Plus she’s Vera’s sister, and he has mostly positive feelings about her so by relation he thinks Valerie is pretty alright. Also soft because cat.

Vera

Vera is intimidating but he respects her, in a sense. As someone who isn’t affluent he’s more wary of her scams and often disapproves if he thinks it’s taking advantage of vulnerable people, but so long as she’s scamming rich people he’s down for it. He definitely thinks she’s smart and an interest conversationalist.

Wolfpack

Bad, stinky, 0/10. Only tolerable because of their connection to Scott but otherwise obnoxious.

Zoe

Last but not least, Jin would like Zoe. He’d appreciate her creativity and particularly her ship fics. They would have a good time talking about crushes, who should date who, and the latest books in their respective favourite series (or perhaps shared shows or books). She also tells Leonard to shove it and since he wants to punt the kappa into the sun he likes that a lot.