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h4ndwr1tten · 2 years ago

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𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭?

characters — nanami kento x reader

note — this took me a long ass time to write. if it seems familiar to any other works, i requested something with the same plot on someone else's blog lololol. THIS IS PART 1 AS IT'S A LITTLE LENGTHY!!! dividers by benkeibear.

(am i posting this on nanami's birthday? yes.)

cw — not proof read, established relationship, kinda ooc nanami? like one mention of sex, pregnancy, strong language, arguing, crying, accusations of cheating, hurt/no comfort.

synopsis — the test results are positive and you aren't ready. when you try to hide this from your boyfriend of 5 years, he assumes the worst.

part 1 | part 2

this wasn't supposed to happen. it shouldn't have happened. you both took every precaution possible to prevent an outcome neither of you were prepared for — from condoms, to birth control, to plan b. it had kept you safe for as long as you started having sex. you never found yourself worried about carrying a life in you for 9 months.

so why now does the test read positive?

it felt like the world stopped moving. you didn't even know if you were still breathing. your heart had fallen into the pit of your stomach, your eyes wide and full of disbelief. you couldn't believe it. it couldn't have been correct. the 99% accurate claim on the kit had to be lying. there was no way it could've been true.

it took some time, but you were able to tear your gaze away from the test. you looked up to the ceiling, blinking away the hot tears you could feel building up. you took a few deep breaths and tried to swallow down the lump in your throat, your fingers trembling around the test.

you've thought about having kids before. you did want them, just not now. you were unprepared for this. how do you raise a kid when you aren't ready, when you aren't even married?

then it hit you — nanami's involved in this too.

the realization made you feel 10x worse. if you weren't ready for a child, you could only imagine how he would feel about this. his life was going so well right now. he was happy with his career and his salary, he was content with the apartment you both shared, and he was even more happy to be with you. he had his whole life and future planned out. he knew when he would retire and even what he'll do in life after he retires. nanami saw you in his future, you were always there when he would think of it. but would you still be there if he found out you were currently pregnant with his child?

you two had never fully talked about having kids together. you both were confident that you would spend the rest of your lives together. you've discussed marriage, homes, and briefly, kids. it was never a deep conversation — you only ever talked about having them and how many there would be. but never about having them earlier than expected.

gosh, you felt like shit. utter, absolute shit. you felt even worse for nanami. you felt like you were going to ruin his life plans. you felt like this would be the downfall of your relationship. and if it was, who knew if you would ever recover.

your phone buzzed with a notification, pulling you back to reality. you didn't realize tears had fallen until one slipped from your chin and landed on the hand gripping the test. you stood from where you sat on the closed toilet and checked your phone. it was a text from nanami.

i'll be home soon, my love. do you want me to bring anything home?

he was so caring. always considering you, always putting you first. you couldn't help but feel even more guilty.

hi ken. could you get some takeout pls? i'm sorry, i'm not in the mood to be cooking rn.

of course. want anything specific? are you feeling alright?

i'm fine. you can choose tonight :)

alright then. i'll be home soon, i love you ❤️

i love you too 💕

you shut your phone off and placed it back on the counter, screen facing down. you felt horrible — he was always thinking of your needs before his. would this end now that your carrying his child? certainly he wouldn't want to have to worry about another person in his life at the moment. you wouldn't want him to worry.

you stood from the toilet seat, about to leave the restroom when you caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror. your face was bright pink and red, your eyes also red but not super puffy and swollen. some people might think it was allergies, but not nanami. nanami wasn't some people — he knew you better than anyone, perhaps even yourself. he could see right through you, read you like a book. you began to worry what he would say if the pigment in your face didn't fade in time, if he would ask if you had been crying.

what would you say if he did ask? he knows you so well, it's nearly impossible to lie to the man. you could say you were rewatching your favorite show and got emotional, or reading another chapter or more of the book he bought you the other day. but nanami isn't dumb. he would catch on before you could even finish your excuse, he'd know something's up.

you sighed, inhaling and exhaling deeply. you didn't know how this was going to play out. you didn't know how to act or what to say to nanami when he came home. you were just hoping for the best.

the lock on the door clicked once, twice, and then the door opened. you had been in your shared bedroom, watching some corny rom-com to ease your mind. you had hidden any evidence of the pregnancy test. you threw away the box and instructions, then threw out the trash bag you tossed them in. you kept the test, however, and hid it in your purse that was now laying on your bed. nanami wasn't one to snoop. if he wanted to check something of yours, he would ask permission. and if you didn't grant it, he would respect your boundaries like he always does.

"my love?" you heard nanami's voice echo throughout the apartment. normally, you would've been waiting by the door for him and greeted him excitedly, but for obvious reasons, you weren't.

leaving the bedroom and walking to nanami, who was walking in the hallway and you assumed he was looking for you, you gave him a small smile.

"hi ken," you said quietly, wrapping your arms around his waist instead of his neck where you usually do. you stood up on your toes to reach his lips, kissing them gently and not for long. when you pulled back, nanami leaned down for another, a longer one. were you ever going to get these kisses again if he found out you were carrying his child?

for real this time, you both pulled away. you still smiled softly up at nanami, but he was observing you closely, worry swimming in his honey brown eyes.

three things were running through his mind right now: why were your cheeks and eyes tinted a bright red, as if you had been crying? why didn't you seem as eager to see him after work like usual, wrap your arms over his shoulders and around his neck, and kiss him for more than a second? something was wrong. did he do something? did you know what food he bought and were you not pleased by it? were you feeling sick?

"ken?" you asked, breaking him out of his thoughts. "are you alright?"

"are you alright?" he returned, worry still plastered throughout his face.

you then looked confused, though you weren't, slowly nodding your head, "yeah... why?"

nanami stayed quiet for a second. maybe you were just tired, maybe he was overthinking this. but that idea didn't sit right with him. it was like his gut was telling him that something was up with you. but he didn't know what.

not wanting to push you, he answered, "nothing. i missed you though. let's go eat?"

throughout dinner, nanami noticed how quiet you were. if it were any other day, you would have been telling him about your day, the latest gossip, about the episode you watched or the chapter you read. you were barely even touching your food too. you occasionally took small bites, but most of the time, you were just poking it with your fork.

while he was putting the dishes away, you grabbed yourself a glass of water. that's when nanami asked you, "love, are you sure you're alright?"

"yeah, i'm fine. why do you ask that?" you replied unsurely, looking down at your water.

"i'm sorry. you just seem... off." nanami washed his hands, looking you up and down carefully.

that was another strange thing he noticed. you hadn't looked in his eyes when you told him you were fine. you always make eye contact with him. you're never afraid to and you're not one to break it so quickly, much less avoid it.

he was beginning to question whether you were really fine.

you had just finished getting ready for bed, teeth and hair brushed, skin care routine done. nanami had finished getting ready before you, so he was waiting for you by the bed. but instead of reading a book or even scrolling through his phone, his eyes were glued to you in worry. you could tell he was becoming suspicious of you, and you wished you hadn't made your troubles so obvious. your head was beginning to ache and you were desperately hoping that nanami wouldn't ask any questions.

those hopes were left unsatisfied.

"my love, are you sure you're okay?" nanami asked for what felt like the hundredth time today.

you sighed deeply. "yes, kento, i'm fine," emphasizing the fine. "my head just hurts right now. have you seen the tylenol?" you added, hoping that it would be enough to stop his questioning.

"no, do you want me to check your bag?"

you felt stupid for having kept an small extra bottle of tylenol in your bag. nanami reached over to your side of the bed, grabbing your purse. he had pulled the zipper open when you realized what was about to happen.

"no!" you yelped, practically sprinting to the bed and snatching the bag away from him. you checked to see if the bag had been open enough to see the test, which it hadn't, and some relief washed over you. but then you realized how much worse you had made your current situation with nanami.

fuck. i fucked up. i'm fucked.

nanami's brows were furrowed together, his face painted with a mix of frustration, confusion, and concern. he looked you up and down over and over again, gaze switching from you to your bag repeatedly.

"okay, y/n, seriously. what the hell is going on with you? first, i come home and you don't seem as excited as you tend to be. then your face is all red like you had been crying. then you—you barely talk to me, hell, even look at me throughout dinner! you touched your food like, what, 5 times? and then when i try to look through your bag to help you, you panic and snatch it away from me?"

kento's ramble had you silent. you didn't know how what to say, what stupid excuse you could use, how to explain your behavior. you only avoided his gaze and stared down at your bag. the thick, suffocating silence lasted for a moment longer, then nanami finally spoke again.

"y/n, are you..."

he paused and took a deep breath, as if to prepare himself for what he was about to say.

"are you cheating on me, y/n...?"

you were dumbfounded. in absolute, utter shock. how could nanami, the person who you believed to have the most trust in you, think that you would be unfaithful to him? yes, you realized how skeptical your behavior was. but for him to come to the assumption that you'd cheat on him? it stung a little—a lot, actually.

"what? no... no, of course not, kento! how could you say that?" you retorted, finally looking him in the eyes.

"gee, i don't know, maybe 'cause you can barely even look at me and you're very obviously hiding something!" his voice raising more with each word spoken.

you had no argument to counter what he had just laid out to you because he was right. you couldn't look at him for more than 5 seconds and you were hiding something. you eyed the floor beneath you, opening and shutting your mouth as you tried to think of something to say. nothing ever came out though.

a heavy sigh cut through your thoughts. you looked up from the floor and saw nanami shaking his head, running his hand down his face. he was so disappointed, you could feel his hurt radiating off of him.

"i'm going to sleep," he muttered, reaching for the lamp and dimming it. lying down, nanami shuffled into a more comfortable position, facing away from your side of the bed, and pulling the covers up to his shoulders.

"ken—"

"night, y/n."

you didn't know what you were going to say anyways. tears slid down your cheeks and the least you could do for nanami was keep quiet and let him rest. you realized that you wanted to apologize. apologize for the way you had been behaving towards him this entire evening, for making him doubt your faithfulness to him.

you slid into bed next to him, facing away from him as well. your body shook with the sobs you fought hard to keep in, nose stuffy and pillow quickly becoming soaked. you thought that the positive pregnancy test would have been the downfall of this relationship—now you wonder, will this argument turn these past 5 years into a mere memory?

m. list

#this has been in my drafts forever #nanami x reader #nanami kento x reader #nanami kento x you #nanami x you #nanami angst #nanami kento angst #hurt/no comfort #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x you #jjk angst #jujutsu kaisen angst #nanami kento #jjk #jujutsu kaisen

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envy-of-the-apple · 8 months ago

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I cant stop thinking about mafia boss suguru constantly changing plans for reader on the fly everytime he meets her since the DAY HE MET YOU IN PERSON

I just feel like he is because i kept thinking back on reader's fumble at suguru's meeting and making her sit on his lap, that's just an out of pocket thing to do to your employee(especially if youre turning a blind eye to him and his tame advancements) and my brain got out of hand with its assumptions every moment suguru decides what to do with reader

I mean it would be a cute (twisted)romance when he mentioned doing his background check with apathy then when he met you for real he never expected a barrage of feelings he felt for you, so originally he would pimp you out, but in you go to do office work instead because youre mine or rather ours now, and then proceeded to do an impressive feat of lightning quick decisions that luckily tips to his favor, like your confrontation with your father's aggrieved enemies and was presented with fool proof of an opportunity to have a solid future with you(im fuming he just let that dude go and let men from rivaling groups vex us!)

As much as premeditated machinations go, lucky bastard suguru is unironically funny and brushing with your father's enemy feels like a moment he never anticipated?? Idk, that part cemented what my brain is cooking of him

Would you ever consider dropping another part for suguru's pov? I really wanna know at what point he fell for reader(and i wanna know what hes thinking when reader said "just for one night 🥺")

omg seeing this in my inbox was such a treat! I love it when yall get analytical.

What can I say? Suguru is an opportunist, he's sadistic enough to let you get bullied and tossed around a little, just so you can plead and cry so prettily in his arms. If if makes you feel any better, Suguru was keeping a close eye on the men who crashed Miss Gem's apartment, and made sure you weren't there to get hurt. He just wanted to scare you enough to coax you into his arms lololol. So many people theorized that he was the one who orchestrated it, (he didn't, suguru hates getting his hands dirty). How could he have known that letting that man get away would cause this domino effect? If anything he and his husband are the good guys for giving you a refuge for such a low price.

Omg the love at first sight trope is so funny for Suguru. Buuut if you reread the fic again you might find that's not exactly what happened:).

I really like the way this ended so I probably wont be making a part two or anything in suguru's pov. buut to answer your last question suguru was definitely nodding along but in his head he was going 'right like we're ever letting you go after this'.

After all, it wasn't really a choice. But for your sake, he made you think you had one. See, he really does love you;)

#yandere jjk #dark jjk #yandere #yakuza au satosugu #dark geto suguru #yandere geto suguru #RAST ask

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wheatnoodle · 2 years ago

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i love you, evangeline

og post | part 1 | part 2

evie didn’t sleep a wink that night. she stayed up, tossing and turning in her pink sheets until ultimately giving up and passing the time watching movies on her laptop.

the sun rises through her curtains and knowing robin has an early shift, she pulls herself out of bed and into the kitchen.

there’s french toast in a pan on their stovetop when the thoughts that had plagued her all night came back. she misses dustin somethin’ fierce. thinking about being able to sit with him and hear all about the years she’s missed not being there, of telling her everything my she’s always dreamed of telling him. all the things he had missed as well.

she wanted him there for every accomplishment they’d had out here. she wanted to open the letter with him when she got into college. she wanted to wake up after her confirmation surgeries to robin AND dustin waiting by her bedside (she at least had robin for those which she is eternally grateful for. everything evie has done since she left, she wanted dustin there with her.

robin comes stumbling in, all bed head and smudged mascara. she flops into a stool at their kitchen table, eyeing evie suspiciously as she places a plate in front of her, a mug of hot tea following soon after. evie sits next to her, her own plate and mug on the table.

“what’re you doing up?” robin asks through a yawn and picks up her mug.

“good morning to you too,” evie says and reaches out a hand to try and tuck some of the tangles of robin’s hair behind her ear. robin rolls her eyes and sighs heavily.

“good morning, dingus. why are up?” she smiles and sips her tea. evie’s poking at her french toast with her fork, her eyes down at the table rather than where robin’s are burning holes into the side of her head.

“i wanted to talk to you,” is what she decides on.

“about what?”

“…i wanna see dustin…when he comes to visit.”

robin’s brows shoot up under her bangs and she can’t stop the warm smile growing on her face. she’s been waiting years to hear those words. years she was more than happy to wait, but years nonetheless.

“i’ll let him know. maybe he can come over for dinner,” she rests her hand on evie’s knee and smiles at the little nod her friend gives. this is good for them.

~🌷🌻~

taggie waggies:

@lololol-1234 @xo-r4e @paintsplatteredandimperfect @homohomohoe @charlies-candid-corner @tartarusfairy @howincrediblysapphicofyou @crying-trashcan @steddie-as-they-go @bestwifehaver @sexymothmanincarnate @zoeweee @romanticdestruction @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @breadboi66 @shadowofaliar @mollymawkwrites @lofaewrites @estrellami-1 @ronance-is-my-wife

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meowyn · 9 months ago

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Linger

gender neutral reader, just some comfort set directly after chapter 11.

a/n - started to write this at 5am and it's now 7:30, god help me. this might be ooc & really short i'm sorry i've not actually posted something recent in years lololol but i love last legacy & felix sm so!!

felix didn't miss the way you clung to his side after his (and your) return from the hells, the two of you finally settling down for the night. he was perched on the edge of his side of the bed, meanwhile you lingered behind him, casting worried glances his way whenever you decided to look at him directly. though, he noticed you hadn't looked at his face once, which made his heart ache terribly for you.

whilst he was in the midst of figuring out what to say, how best to soothe your anxiety, he felt your head bump lightly onto his back while your arms slowly circled around his waist. he waited silently as he heard you inhale deeply, shakily breathing him in as you often did, and for once as you exhaled the tension didn't leave your body at all.

a worried frown tugged at his lips before he spoke, quiet and (he hoped) comforting, "what's the matter, love?"

of course, he knew what was wrong. he had just died, after all, and he'd be an absolute fool to miss the sheer terror in your eyes at that fact. he just wanted to give you a chance to let it all out yourself, to please just trouble him with this, at least.

as if you could read his mind, a muffled sob escaped you and you squeezed him tighter, and he didn't know wether he what he felt was relief of devastation.

"i'm sorry.." you murmured, sniffling in a futile attempt to stop the seemingly endless flow of tears, "you.. died today, and here i am, crying like some sort of idiot."

he sighed at that, gently untangling your fingers from his shirt before twisting around to face you.

"oh, my sweet.." he cooed, cupping your face in his hands as he wiped away your tears, kissing at your nose for good measure, "as i told you, i have died many times so-"

"that doesn't matter!" you surprise both of you by blurting out, holding onto his wrists tightly and looking at him so desperately he feels his heart nearly tumble out of his throat.

"it's just.." you mutter, pushing past your initial statement in hopes you could get your point across to him, unaware that he already understood perfectly, "i was so worried, you were so cold.. and your eyes were so hollow that even now i'm afraid to look."

he nodded empathetically, about to respond until he saw your expression change to a deep frown as you suddenly glared at him, rendering him speechless.

"god, for someone so smart you can be such an idiot. why would you jump in front of me like that? who do you think you are? batman?" frustration laced your tone as you spoke, sniffling once more as you were about to continue ranting. until you glanced at his face, that silly, boyish grin adorning his features making any negative feelings you had dissipate, in turn making him laugh fondly as a blush crept it's way up your cheeks.

"batman? who is that?" he asked, still smiling even as you shot him another glare for his teasing tone, "forgive me, but i cannot quite feel the full force of your anger when you're pouting like that."

felix chuckled again as you sighed in defeat, leaning forward until you were wrapped up fully in his embrace, he pressed a soft kiss to the crown of your head.

"i'm not angry at you," you murmured into his chest, head tucked where his shirt was left unbuttoned so you could feel his heartbeat against your ear, "though i will be if you frighten me like that again."

"i understand, however," with his fingers under your chin, he urged your head up to look at him, "whenever i have an opportunity to keep you safe, i'm going to take it. you don't understand how precious you are, do you?"

you're unable to argue with that, especially as you feel the days exhaustion set in and felix's hand rubbing soothing circles into your back.

"you're precious to me too, so please, no dying if you can help it." as you utter the words, you already know what he's thinking, and when you share a look you think back on his earlier words to you.

'but death would never keep me from you. not for long.'

then, when he holds your face in his hands once more, you're both smiling as he kisses away every remnant of your upset with every bit of devotion a votary saves for their diety. he loves you, you think, and you know you love him.

#felix escellun x reader #last legacy #last legacy felix #last legacy felix x reader #thisisterribleimsosorry

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gingergofastboatsmojito · 5 months ago

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His avoidance

I read this quote a few days ago and it reminded me of these two:

Source: Marriage.com YES! MARRIAGE DOT COM LOLOLOL!

So since I already went over her avoidant behavior 🔗 that might have as well cost us SYDCARMY this season:

Now I am gonna be fair because Carmy is avoidant too but differently. They are like "50 shades of I DON'T WANNA DEAL WITH MY FEELINGS, I RATHER COOK".

And in the bonus track, I will focus on the only great part of being a master avoidant.

So, Carmy... His avoidant behavior is a different shade of avoidance because while also being a defense mechanism, it is rooted in his C-PTSD, which he described in the AA meeting S1 monologue pretty well. He grew up in a totally different environment than Syd 🔗 but he also felt lonely and that scared him emotionally.

Avoidance resulted from that emotional scaring process that affects him even to this day. C-PTSD and PTSD are not the same, so it's important not to misdiagnose the two. Also, C-PTSD can cause autobiographical memory gaps but it only affects functional memory.

That being said, Carmy is extremely self-aware because he is an introvert. My theory also includes his AUADHD type, but I will not dive into that neurodivergency in this post, I will focus on his introverted type and avoidant behavior. That self-awareness is what differentiates him the most from Sydney who is an ambivert (extra-introvert). She defaults to denial, and he defaults to sublimation.

I went over his sublimation several times:

Here 🔗

And here 🔗

Yeah... I gave it some thought ok?

Carmy doesn't avoid feeling, he avoids acknowledging, but he's not in full-on denial, he just dances around an idea, a concept he's fully aware of, and then decides to disregard it thinking that by doing so it will disappear. It doesn't and then it becomes ART.

It becomes ANGER.

It becomes INSOMNIA.

Just like in Syd's case, it becomes PANIC/ANXIETY.

It becomes ADDICTION.

It becomes silence that feels like something crashing his chest and not letting him say the words he wants to say OR cry. It becomes PARALISYS.

And he runs away from it by cooking or sketching, smoking, etc. Instead of facing it even if it hurts, elaborating on it and letting it out verbally, crying his heart out if necessary, and eventually healing.

I am positive that ended in 03x10 when he was strong enough to confront his nemesis and then have a good cry, finally!!! I was sooo happy for him, it broke my heart, but I was happy. He's finally on the mend.

Carmy will continue avoiding feelings he doesn't feel ready to cope with, deflecting and diverting to other stuff to fool himself, sure!

But this will not traumatize him anymore.

He will go about it differently now that he can let out certain things that were stuck in him for far too long. This will also enable other "un-stuck" processes, such as finally leaving C behind after having an adult conversation / giving that relationship the closure it deserves, which he has been avoiding since last season.

But for that, he will have to quit avoiding the reason why he stalled it in the first place, which I explained → here 🔗

I am sure S4 will be all about that because that's exactly where he ended last season, so it's the logical progression:

I bet everything on his success.

Avoidants are masters of the unspoken communication

Bonus track: Both Carmy and Syd are masters of unspoken communication, that's also why they end up overdoing it, they end up abusing that skill they have and it turns counterproductive. But it is a skill nonetheless. THOSE LOOKS, THOSE SILENCES, THAT UNSPOKEN LOVE, THEY CAN SAY IT ALL WITHOUT PRONOUNCING A SINGLE WORD OR BETWEEN THE LINES OF THE FEW WORDS THEY SAY. THEIR TRADE MARK. THEY MASTER SILENCES AND INFLECTIONS LIKE NO OTHERS. THEY CAN SAY IT ALL "DIFFERENTLY".

They got this. Let's give them more time. S4 is gonna be all about them learning to use their words "properly" after they stop avoiding the conversation they owe each other.

Remember to follow my tag #Gingerpovs 💋

#sydcarmy #his avoidance #the bear #carmy berzatto #gingerpovs #the bear meta #sydney adamu #carmy x sydney #the bear season 3 #the bear season 4 gingerpredictions #carmen berzatto #the bear fx #syd x carmen #sydcarmy endgame #USE YOUR WORDS

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torahoes · 6 months ago

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(IDOLiSH7) Touma Inumaru - An Idol's Daily Life Rabbit Chat: Part 1 - Send-Off with an Idol's Smile

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Please note that I am not a professional translator. If you come across any mistakes, feel free to let me know and I will make the necessary corrections.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Inumaru-san, good work. Thank you very much for appearing as a guest on MEZZO"'s radio show today!

Tsumugi Takanashi: Both of them seemed very happy and said they had a lot of fun talking with you about various topics!

Touma Inumaru: Good work today, Takanashi-san! I love music and often listen to MEZZO"'s radio show, so I had a blast too!

Touma Inumaru: I was so caught up in the deep conversation with Sougo that I forgot I was at work and got really fired up lol

Touma Inumaru: So much so that when Yotsuba kept asking me stuff without hesitation, I wanted to share so much with him, but time flew by too quickly.

Tsumugi Takanashi: You all were chatting in the waiting room after it ended too! And thank you so much for the King Pudding you brought for him!

Touma Inumaru: No problem at all! I was really glad that he was so happy! His eyes were sparkling when he went, "Can I eat all of it!?" It was adorable.

Touma Inumaru: Although Sougo immediately stopped him, saying, "You can't eat ALL of it" lololol

Tsumugi Takanashi: He said he planned to eat one tonight and one tomorrow morning. Lol

Touma Inumaru: I did that when I was a kid too. Whenever I bought a box of ice cream, I always wanted to eat several at once.

Touma Inumaru: I didn't think anyone would notice because there were so many, so this one time I secretly ate like three at a once and ended up with a stomach ache lolol

Tsumugi Takanashi: Three at once…? That's enough to freeze your stomach...

Touma Inumaru: I was dumb lololol. My mom found out immediately and got mad, so I started planning when to eat them over the week.

Tsumugi Takanashi: When you're a kid, you take snack times really seriously, don't you? Lol

Tsumugi Takanashi: It wasn’t ice cream in my case, but when my dad bought me a tin of cookies, I would get excited and carefully choose which one to eat each day.

Touma Inumaru: So you actually stuck to the plan? That's impressive!

Tsumugi Takanashi: Well... sometimes I couldn’t resist and secretly ate two at once… > <

Touma Inumaru: We're all the same lolololol

Tsumugi Takanashi:

Tsumugi Takanashi: By the way, I saw on the morning show that you're going to appear in the "Send-Off with an Idol's Smile!" segment!

Touma Inumaru: Thank you! I'm just a guest for a week, so I'm going to do my best to leave a good impression.

Tsumugi Takanashi: It's a popular segment, so I think it will have a big impact…!

Tsumugi Takanashi: I often hear how people are thrilled to receive a "Have a great day!" from their favorite idol right after the weather forecast.

Touma Inumaru: I heard it gets a lot of buzz on social media with tags like "Today's XX-san" trending!

Tsumugi Takanashi: Yes, they make posts with the "I'm off now" tag right when the idols say, "Have a great day" on the show. It trends every morning!

Tsumugi Takanashi: I'm sure when you’re on, "#Today's_Inumaru-san" will be a hot topic.

Touma Inumaru: I'm looking forward to it, but I'm also a bit nervous lol

Touma Inumaru: Honestly, when I got the offer, I was really surprised. Like, me? Seriously? The people that come on this show have a fresh image that fits the morning vibe, so I wondered if my smile would be a good fit.

Touma Inumaru: The other day, I offered my hand to a kid who fell in front of me and he started crying lolol

Tsumugi Takanashi: Maybe he was just startled > <

Touma Inumaru: I don’t have a friendly face like Haru or Mina, so maybe I scared him. I was also wearing a hat pulled down low and a mask.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Perhaps it was because of that disguise...!

Touma Inumaru: Now that I think about it, I was also wearing sunglasses, so that might be it lol

Tsumugi Takanashi:

Tsumugi Takanashi: Riku-san also said that he feels he would be energized being sent off with Inumaru-san's smile.

Touma Inumaru: Rikuuuu!! He’s such a nice guy!!

Touma Inumaru: I’ll send him a Rabbit Chat later!

Tsumugi Takanashi:

Touma Inumaru: Actually, I wanted to thank you, Takanashi-san!

Tsumugi Takanashi: Eh, did I do something!?

Touma Inumaru: When you sent MEZZO" to the booth saying "Have a great day," it felt so fresh and warm. I thought it was really nice.

Touma Inumaru: I was like "I definitely have to learn from this!" and made sure to take mental notes lol

Tsumugi Takanashi: I’m honored you would say that > <

Touma Inumaru: Do you have any tips?

Tsumugi Takanashi: I haven't thought deeply about it, but I always try to convey a sense of "Do your best!" when I send them off.

Touma Inumaru: I see, so it's all about conveying that feeling. That's important!

Touma Inumaru: I hope I can send off the viewers with a feeling that energizes them too!

Tsumugi Takanashi:

End of Part 1.

#idolish7 translation #zool #idolish7 #ainana #i7 #id7 #touma inumaru #inumaru touma #toma inumaru #inumaru toma #rabbitchat #rabbit chat #i7 translation

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authorraville · 1 year ago

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Changes of heart.

Sorry for not updating, I was busy with life but I got this in my draft so enjoy?

Trigger warning: Abuse

He doesn't know. He doesn't know what the hell is wrong with him, even after 25 minutes, Lucifer hasn't stopped whipping him.

" Have you learned your lesson ? "

The voice echoed around the room.

" Get up the punishment isn't done. If you stop being such a hassle you wouldn't get here in the first place. "

Of course, even if he's not the one who did it.

His back felt hot as if he just got burned, he felt like dying, he wants to cry but no tears came out.

It's useless to beg for mercy to his so called older brother who will never be fair. even so he's still waiting for his older brother to cares about him.

He eventually grew tired of waiting. How long does he needs to wait? How millennial years does he needs to wait?

" You know the rules. Don't try to escape until midnight. " Lucifer sigh as he fixing his gloves.

Just when he thought everything ends there, his 'little brothers' finally comes out of their rooms just to make fun of him.

Asmodeus make a gesture of a fake microphone stupidly asking mammon

" how does it feels to be a halfwit? "

" Stop it Asmo, he's probably not smart enough to understand that 'complicated' word. Let me rephrase that. " Satan scoffs.

" How does it feels to be an idiot ? "

A bright flickering light start to flash on his face. Mammon's used to it but somehow it started to hurt his eyes.

" Lololol you look so stupid right now. " As usual the third born would come up with something similar each day.

Beelzebub standing far away watching them while munching his snacks, it's not unusual to watch his brothers 'teasing' his older brother after all.

" Hey I'm your older brother show some respect to me "

" You should act like one then. You act nothing like an older brother should be "

Belphegor scoffed.

mammon stay silent as the brothers keep mocking him, well atleast until they get bored and goes to their rooms.

They don't love you anymore.

some voice started to whispering in his head.

' it's noisy, shut up '

You're so pathetic taking your brothers insult knowing it too well that half of it isn't even right.

If he could he would close his ears just to shut those voice down. But he's tie up

Why are you being like this?

Nobody loves you for being yourself.

Nobody accepted you.

you're pathetic.

Those words keep ringing in his ears, he's gasping for air and hoping that what he hears isn't real. His brothers love him. His brothers must love him. They're brother after all, they must-

But are they though?

They've never appreciate him when he does his best. They never accept him as he is, always throw an insult knowing pretty damn well it'll hurt. Blaming him for their own mistake and benefits.

Do they even love him?

His eyes grow tired reflecting his feelings. The feelings that he treasure for his brothers were no longer there. The hope, love and trust is all gone.

" I believe you already learn your lesson. Don't do it again mammon. It's a warning. " as he untie mammon from the ceiling.

He expected his younger brother to be no more than crying or sulking like he always does. But somehow this time felt different.

" understood. " Mammon said walking away to his room ignoring the eldest.

' He must be sulking '

Lucifer thought while going back to his office.

Mammon stare at the ceiling of his room. The light were too bright so he had to close it. His back burned, the whipping left some scars.

' that's a pretty bad scars right there. '

" You should act like one then. You act nothing like an older brother should be "

Belphegor voice rang In his head.

Act nothing like an older brother should be ? Then let me show you how an older brother should be.

The next morning where the brothers usually eating their breakfast together somehow felt a little quieter.

" Ahem, Lucifer is our grades out yet ? " Usually the second born would be the one to start the conversation

" Ah it's out actually. And as usual mammon's the last one. Mammon when will you- "

" I will study don't worry about it. " Mammon cut Lucifer's words and quickly excuse himself out of the table make the brothers felt a little uneasy.

" Is he still sulking ? " Satan sigh.

" Rotfl what do you expect from him "

" I bet he will fall asleep in the class anyways. I'm going. " Satan excuse himself from the table followed by Asmodeus.

" Ehe if he didn't sleep you owe me $5 ! "

Asmodeus bet.

" If he get hit by the teacher you owe me $5. "

Belphegor slide.

" Heh so we're betting now. " Satan fix his tie as he carry his books.

" You guys do know he won't get better even if we're betting our money on him lol "

Mammon gaze upon the gloomy sky. Opening the book that was supposed to be the subject for today ignoring the voices that have been mocking him till' now.

" So you're acting like you're interested in studying now huh " Satan took a sit beside .

After getting no replied he eventually sit down due to the awkwardness. Usually mammon would sleep right when he arrived. Not to mention he would definitely be 'mad' at Satan. Well that's what 'usually' happened.

After the teacher closing the door the lesson has begin.

Right when it ended mammon close his book and headed towards the teacher.

" Usually he would be whining right now what is wrong with him ? " Asmodeus disbelief of what he just witnessed.

" I don't know he even focused in the class, it's bothering me. " shaking off the feeling of uneasiness in his heart.

" Mammon do you want to eat together ? You were not touching your food this morning.. "

As usual Beelzebub would ask one of the brothers to eat with him but since mammon have not eaten anything yet he thought it would be a great idea to do so.

" Sure. " Short but confirming. Mammon keep walking to the office ignoring Beelzebub who was reaching for him.

" What's up with him. " Belphegor can't stand the fact that beel just got ignore by him. What give that bastard the Right to do that?

At the office mammon bump into Lucifer and diavolo. Without hesitation he bow to the both of them.

" Excuse my imprudent self. " he said and head towards the teacher.

" Wow Lucifer I never knew he has this side of him haha. "

Diavolo finds it amusing how someone could change in just one night.

" I wonder what did you do to him last night. " He hum to himself.

" Ah I did nothing. You needn't worry Lord diavolo. " Lucifer sigh.

after asking a few questions to the teacher he eventually head towards the rooftops forgetting his promise with Beelzebub knowing that he probably went ahead without him.

Unfortunately he bump into his brothers on the way there.

" Ah mammon we were just looking for you! "

Asmodeus claimed.

" Yeah we actually went ahead and ate without you, I hope you're not mad. "

Belzebub confessed as he gives mammon the leftover food they have.

" You needn't worry about me. " Mammon walked passed them just so he could get up to the rooftops.

" Is he seriously still sulking.. "

" he seemed kinda mad ? " satan couldn't ignore the fact that he have been acting strange since this morning.

" It's probably nothing, he probably just throwing some tantrum or something. " Belphegor huff.

" Right it's stupidmammon after all. "

You see it for yourself now.

They don't care.

You see how they insult and ignore you.

thus the feelings completely died. He is not the person to admit defeat but he couldn't help but agree. He knows it. He know it all. That the brothers doesn't really care about him. And now he'll be returning the favor.

Mammon always come home late because of his gambling addict. Lucifer's now standing on the right side of the wall just to scold mammon if he came home later than 2 hours like he always does. But to his surprised mammon came home earlier than he expected.

it's not like mammon haven't expected Lucifer to be in the living room. He knows it all that Lucifer actually waited so that he could scold him.

" Mind tell me why you're late? "

Lucifer still not going to let go the fact that mammon's late 5 minutes.

" Late 5 minutes wouldn't change anything in my life. I apologize, please step aside so that I can go to my room. " Mammon state.

Something's wrong. Lucifer could feel it. Mammon's glare, attitude and tone. his tone is cold. His eyes is not beautiful anymore, it's as if someone else is controlling his 'brother'. His eyes were still blue like sapphire yet something's missing.

He stepped aside nonetheless. He couldn't be unreasonable just because of 5 minutes.

Mammon went ahead to his room leaving the eldest alone.

He's tired. He just want to sleep at the moment. But holding the urge and opened the books that he actually bought.

for dinner, Lucifer asked leviathan to call mammon. Even though He's complaining he'll still call mammon nonetheless.

" Oi stupidmammon the dinner is ready hurry up and get downstairs idi- "

His sentence were cut off by the sudden open of mammon's door. He thought mammon would go all happy and thankful that he actually call for him or even tease him but he actually greeted by a glare from the older brother.

" Watch your tongue. " Mammon head downstairs ignoring the latter.

Leviathan who were left speechless followed the elder to the dining room. He was surprised. ' what the hell is wrong with him, ' he thought. But Mammon's glare definitely left chill in his bone.

The dining table is quiet. In fact, a little bit too quiet. Usually mammon would be playing with his phone, or start talking about his day whatsoever but now he's just sitting there eating without doing anything.

He could feel his brothers looking at him.

" If you have something to say you can say it now. " He said while wiping his mouth with a piece of Cloth and start glaring at them.

The brothers were left speechless. Satan felt uneasy knowing that he doesn't feel any wrath coming out from his brother. So why is he acting like this? To get our attention or what?

" Ahaha how was your day mammon ? " Asmodeus trying to ignore his older brother glare.

His brothers has never asked him about his day. So he thought it was unimportant. But why are they asking about it now?

" Unnecessary conversation is not needed. I'm going to my room. " He state going back to his room earlier than the brothers.

" Is he like that while in rad? " Lucifer ask.

" Yeah it's true Lucifer he even focus in class I can't believe my eyes that time ! " Asmodeus claimed.

" He even ignore beel when he was reaching out for him, I don't know if he's just being ungrateful or throwing a tantrum. " Belphegor huff.

" Do something about this Lucifer, he's acting So childish right now. " Satan said while flipping through the book that he just bought.

" I see. I'll have a 'talk' with him. " Lucifer said while drinking his coffee.

The brothers know it damn well that mammon will get punished. They all smiles sinisterly.

Mammon was studying. He already understand all the subjects millennial years ago and reading it again just because.

Well his study session interrupted by Lucifer's text for him to come in his office.

" To what may have i done for you to call me here. " Mammon looked into the elder eyes.

" What's wrong with you? " Lucifer asked.

" Are you seriously still throwing a tantrum because of yesterday small incident? " Lucifer's scoffs.

Small incident?

His back is still burning from yesterday punishment and he still call it a 'small incident' ?

" I'm fine, need not worry about it. And I am not throwing a tantrum sir. " He stares at Lucifer. His cold and empty eyes shocked Lucifer.

" You.." Lucifer wanted to ask ' are you okay ?' but his pride wouldn't let him so. His brother cold and empty stares that he has not seen in years after taking mammon to become his brother from Michael.

" Since you seem to have nothing to say, please excuse me sir. "

Mammon intercept and immediately gets out of Lucifer's room just to be greeted by his brothers.

" Lol did you get punished again? " Leviathan sneers.

" Bet he did " Belphegor scoffs.

" I thought I told you to watch your tongue leviathan?. " Mammon said while wiping his hands with his handkerchief.

Everyone could see how leviathan tense towards mammon's words. ' what's up with Levi? Why is he scared? '

" This may or may not be the last warning. Watch your tongue you piece of shit. " Mammon walks away after cursing the younger avatars leaving them Dumbstruck.

They all see how cold Mammon's gaze towards them. The nostalgia of someone they've forgotten.

#mammon angst #angst #no happy ending

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stupidlovergirl · 2 years ago

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Levi! The Babygirl Otaku Shut-in!

A small collection of blurbs/headcannons of what it's like to date Levi!

not edited

Leviathan, who streams for money. He’s introverted and a little shy, but when he is live streaming feels different. He is pretty popular too, and people think his expressiveness is pretty funny. He plays all different kinds, but everyone can tell he has a soft spot for indie games and dating simulators. After you guys start dating, he accidentally slips up and mentions you while playing one. It was a simple “Oh! Me and my s/o did something like this the other day lololol.” Chat went absolutely FERAL. Shut-in otaku Levi!?!? WITH A LOVER?!?!?! They were demanding for a reveal. He discussed if you were comfortable or not. If you said yes he would be absolutely ECSTATIC, he would be ok with a no tho, he gets it can be pretty stressful. If you would just like to be on call, no face that's cool! He gets so happy if you say you are fine with a full reveal, face and all!! Brags about you so much, his chat clowns him so hard. They stop calling him by his name and just call him your boyfriend. Ever since then you sometimes play games with him, your choice! The chat loves you two!!! They call you two couple goals when you start making fun of each other.

Levi really likes to visit the beach when he gets out of the house. Hope you can drive, he cannot. If you can’t, better start preparing those puppy dog eyes to convince Mammon to take you two to the beach. He really likes collecting seashells for Henry’s tank on the seashore with you. I think Levi would be really good at surfing!! He heard about it from the human world, and really wanted to give it a shot. He kills it!! He also likes having picnics there too. Cute foods or leftovers are all fine with him, he just thinks it's fun. He’s a sap.

He makes mixtapes for you. He knows people make playlists now, but he thinks having a physical one is a little more meaningful. He draws cute hearts and a picture of the two of you on the CD. Are there a lot of anime songs on there? Yes. Your point? Miku didn’t make these to go to WASTE!!!! Also includes songs that remind him of you, and songs you mentioned that made you think of him.

Levi is a little bit more weird on how he shows affection. He never really had a long term relationship (maybe not even short term ones…). He doesn’t always get it. Show him you love him though your ways and he’ll show you how he loves. Making couples cosplay to even outfits you said you wanted but they didn’t have the correct sizes or lengths. He likes when you wear these, as they leave marks of him on you. He also likes giving you items he owns to wear. Bracelets, pins, shirts, whatever you want you can have!! Levi gets a little possessive, especially since he doesn’t attend class in person a lot. He also might bring back fossils. He just thinks they're neat. Also, stuffed animals are a must. He gets them for you on instinct. They're cute like you, and are good for nests! (I like to think demons nest. That is what Levi's bathtub bed doubles as since hardly anyone comes into his room)

Continuing his strange affection streak: physical affection. He bites softly on your cheeks or arms, cuddles almost look like he’s killing you because he wraps around you like a snake, just funny little things that make you laugh sometimes. He also like to cuddle because he is naturally a little colder, because he is a reptile based demon. Will surprise you with his cold hands and laugh at your misery. Kiss him in public and he shuts up. I bet he is so ticklish from lack of touch hnrgh. Tickle him till he cries!!! His laugh becomes so ugly and he snorts and starts crying and it looks so CUTE!!!! He is just a touch starved cutie please give him all the lovings! Do expect revenge for this though, he is not a merciful demon.

I think he glows in the dark. Bio-luminescent sea creature my dudes(gender neutral)!!!! Night light boyfriend!!! He likes it when you kiss those marks, because for a long time he was insecure of them. Honestly? Loving any part of his demon form makes him feel better, because he still hates them. He has made an uneasy peace with a lot of it, but sometimes he still feels intensely disgusted by them. Ask him permission and Touch! His! Horns! Tell them how it reminds of coral (I think they might be based off of fire coral specifically?). Pet his tail!! He appreciates it, even if you sometimes have to chase it because he gets excited and it starts to wag. You feel like you're fighting a beast trying to catch it some days.

These ones are a little more serious. Please remember he has bad anxiety!! Depression also comes hard on him too. You can notice because his hygiene starts to slip first. Levi might be a shut in, but he doesn’t like to smell. He escapes for little showers, or at least takes rag baths. Please encourage him to shower, sometimes that means being in the bathroom with him, not always necessarily in the bath with him though. He just likes your presence, you never feel overwhelming to him. He might ask you to wash his hair at these times. Speaking might be too much in these times too. Just turn on Ruri-chan or the TSL movies. They’re his comfort shows. Let him take his time. He’ll tell you soon enough.

Back to light-hearted ones now!! Levi really likes terms of endearments. His favorite ones to call you is Henry, Player 2, and when he’s being really cringe “his Waifu/Husbando”. He also really likes calling you “his”, not in a toxic way. He just sometimes likes knowing that you are his like he is yours. Just calling you “his s/o” makes his heart flutter. Levi likes any name you give him! Obviously there are the ones that are the matching one to it, like “Lord of Shadows” and “Player 1”. Please babygirl him, he loses his mind. He CANNOT believe he’s your babygirl! HIM! He doesn’t like when you say it in public, he can only take so much!!!! Much more prefers being called it in private. He really likes any softer pet names, he’s a soft guy!

#leviathan x reader #leviathan x you #i am obsessed with him. I will not apologize.#bunny's.game.collection

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aannonn · 1 year ago

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aaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIM SO NORMAL ABOUT THEM

I LOVE THEM SM ADWSAJDSWADÇLK

My favorite AU.... Is finally back after years. I love them very much.🎔

Mokke for sure did such a emotional letter.. Or maybe Kou is too emotional; Or maybe both! Either way, I love how Kou-kun looks so amazed to the point of crying by the gift Mokke gave him. He's such a great father! ❤ He loves his child so much--

I love them.

Also- Mokke from this art gives me ":3" vibes lololol

Tsukasa looks so shocked. It's like- He's just- Feeling sooOOoo many emotions at once, and the only thing he can do now is ":O", while Nene is just ">:D"

I love them.

And, of course, can't forget Amane here! He looks so flustered.. He's amazed, confused, shocked-

Just like Kou, he's flustered, but just like Tsukasa, he's feeling so many emotions at once that he just can't help but keep reading the letter over and over again and just stay quiet because omg my child just gave me a gift ldkjawdlswada ok act normal. act normal. act normal. act- whatthefu stop getting flustered over a paper omllll bUT ITS NOT JUST A PAPER ITS A GIFT MADE BY MY CHILD MADE FOR MEeEeeeeEE hOW SHOULD I REACT??????????

And Mitsuba is just: ":>"

And, of course; I love them sm aAAAaaa

Welp! I think that's it..? xD

Cya u all in my next post! Goodbye ~ !

lil' edit; Oh, almost forgot- Happy Halloween! Even If I do not celebrate it, I still wish those who celebrate it a happy halloween. 🎔

#jibaku shounen hanako kun #jshk #tbhk #toilet bound hanako kun #have a good day!#have a good afternoon!#have a good night!#Opow

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lansangprincess · 1 year ago

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One Piece Live Action thoughts

mainly about the ships lololol

Disclaimer: I did not read the manga nor watch the anime nor did i know what the plot was when I started watching. why did i start watching u ask? RORONOA ZORO.

I am not lying when I say the sole reason why I watched One Piece was because of Roronoa Zoro and his absolutely gorgeous actor

I like how they handled the production ! Even the most "regular" of settings/scenes already have that kind of animated feel so that when the really animated shit happens it never felt out of place.

I lowkey ship everyone with everyone lmaoooo (except zoro. he is my husband and mine alone.)

koby x luffy: "the next time we see each other we might be enemies" "for now we're friends" ok tempting me w that friends to enemies to lovers slow burn???? work

nami x luffy: the way luffy is absolutely fighting for her to see that she is treasured and valued and doesn't have to run away from close relationships? and it getting through to her?? brb abt to cry

nami x usopp: um hello?? sunshine and sunshine protector???? (u know who's who don't play with me)

nami x sanji: the potential??? the dynamic??? nami always trying to push people away while sanji relentlessly flirts until it chips away her hard demeanor and she becomes soft? years into the friendship she doesn't realize that he stopped flirting w everybody else except her?? i see it i want it i like it let me have it (this is the pairing i want the most sorry not sorry)

sanji x zoro: i'd like to address the nami x zoro stans. to be honest w u, going into the show i thought they'd be my otp bc they're both hotties but i am cementing it now—the only person i will give up my husband for is his enemies-to-lovers boyfriend

koby x haircut: i forgot his name okay? im not sorry. haircut obviously has a crush on koby. i dont really ship it per se but would it make me lol to see haircut go through that journey of denial? yea

usopp x kaya: the only pairing that has any sort of action. it's a predictable ship but i will always support a best friends to lovers ship so idc

kaya x nami: okok i don't exactly ship it either but nami going soft after one night w kaya? T^T I wouldn't be mad at it

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txtmetonight · 10 months ago

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Second Chances?

call summary ⋆ ★ Maybe he's too good for you or maybe your just an asshole

"reader accidentally cheats on member while drunk when he's overseas and he comes back and finds out even though reader tried to hide it from him. but reader truly doesn't want to break up and with a heavy heart tells him to do the same so that they would be even."

caller ID *. * Anonymous

pairing ⋆ ★ OT5 x Fem! Reader

genre *. * Angst, Fluff

warnings ⋆ ★ Cheating, erm toxic behavior, crying, bad grammar bc I was too lazy to check it lol, alcohol

call duration⋆ ★ 4.2k (Headcannons + a little story)

a/n*. * omg sorry this is so late 😭 I work with kids and no one tells you that working with small children gives you the immune system of a Victorian child 💀 and 3 of my classes had assigned me several essays to write. Hopefully this satisfies you bc i changed some of the stuff around so it didn't seem repeated for each member and may have taken your request and just ran with it lololol. Also if you see an uncanny similarities between one of my enhypen headcannons...no you don't zbzbzbz.

Soobin ˚ · • . ° .

✭ The first night that Soobin has ever cried to you, his lips trembled as he tucked his head into the crook of your shoulder, he had asked you not to leave him–to stay with him thick and thin for he couldn’t live a life without you

✭ Pressing soft kisses to his head, you lifted his head to leave a long-lasting kiss on his lips, melting into him before you pulled apart, love swirling on the pads of your fingers as you wiped away his tears

✭ “I will never ever leave you. I promise.”

✭ And you don’t, you really don’t, but now your lips are bruised with guilt that you can’t get rid of as many times as you wash your face, and your eyes are rimmed with tears that can’t seem to stop falling even each time you think that you’re leaked them all

✭ The bathroom mirror reflects a version of yourself that you wished to never see yourself–a lying cheater when your poor hardworking boyfriend was overseas

✭ You really suppose that you didn’t mean to, but you’ve been missing the touch of someone or maybe you were missing the feeling of exhilaration thriving underneath the skin so that’s why...

✭ That’s why you let Hyunjin let you kiss you so soft underneath the club’s lights while your brain fell into a drunken haze that you couldn’t escape

✭ You don’t dare to tell anyone though and for days on end you’re ridiculed with endless guilt and insecurity as you wait for your lover to come back home–which even them brings you more despair

✭ You love Soobin and your heart aches for him and so with much mulling over a despicable thought you had decided that you would hide the sinful kiss and continue with him normally even though your stomach churned in guilty displeasure

✭ And when your boyfriend came back with a flourish of his love, you kiss him hard against his lips trying to erase the pain that stirred deep inside you

“Are you alright babe?” He chuckles, pulling away from you to scan your face, cradling you in his arms. “I... I just missed you a lot” You whisper and pull him back into a kiss again, tears threatening to flood down your cheeks, a promise to yourself that you’d never ever let him find out–even as much as guilt as you felt.

✭ Too bad you weren’t as careful as you thought you were–because, after nights of unrestful slumbers and gut-wrenching pain, you find yourself in the hands of your own karma, hands that choke you slowly when Soobin pulls out a piece of paper that you didn’t even know existed

✭ That sinful night when you committed an act of immorality, it seems so that Hyunjin has slipped his number and rather disgusting words down the pocket of your jeans

“Soobin...” Your head hangs low as you chew on the bottom of your lip, swaying side to side as you watch your boyfriend unfold the slip with a tremble in his hands. “I had fun with you. Hit me up again? XOXO Jinnie.” His eyes are rimmed with red and you your guts swoop and tumble up your throat where they threaten to spill out of your tongue.

“I didn’t mean to,” you cry, walking a step closer to him, but stop when he flinches. “How am I–how am I supposed to trust you.” His words are vile like poison and send you spiraling and before you know it, you’re on you’ve buckled down onto your knees and Soobin’s right by your side in a worry. “(Y/n)–”

“I’m so sorry Soobin! I really–really didn’t mean to, I dunno what happened and all of a sudden, I–no he kissed me and I just–” You’re breaking down and your lover is wiping away your tears and kissing your cheeks. You feel worse than you felt before. You’re not sure why he was doing this but your heart aches for him. It’s about to burst.

“Calm down.” He sighs, pushing back your hair, gently turning your jaw to look at him with pity lacing his eyes. “You’re not going to leave me, are you?” You whimper, eyes widening and jaw going slack when he doesn’t answer. “Soobin?” You’re gasping for air by now and your brain makes you pant when you clutch his hands against you.

“Soobin–you can–you can cheat on me if you want to! I really–please don’t leave me!”

His eyes widen in shock before he shakes his head and pulls you closer to him, letting you curl against his frame while you shake. “(Y/n), sweetheart, I–no. I’m not going to do that.” He reassures but those aren’t the words you’re looking for, searching the expanse of his tearing eyes for them instead. Soobin notices and kisses you softly on the forehead.

“And I’m not going to leave you either.”

Yeonjun ˚ · • . ° .

✭ Yeonjun is truly one of a kind–a man that you couldn’t even start to explain even as much as your tongue twisted and turned with words that tried to describe him

✭ Yeonjun who is your boyfriend, Yeonjun who you love very much that your heart feels like it would explode in adoration, Yeonjun who you’re sure makes out with half of the girls he meets because, he is just so pretty and handsome, and he just can’t help it

✭ Perhaps you are really stupid, too blind in love to notice his tousled hair every other night, or the bright red lips that plaster his neck–a color that you don’t even own!

✭ And maybe you’re tired of it, you really are, but every time you have your body aches to leave him, you always find yourself back at step 1, kissing him fondly as he whispers sweet nonsensical words to you, having you drink it in like ambrosia

✭ You suppose you miss true love once more–and crave it in ways that you couldn’t imagine

✭ So, when you let a childhood friend that you’ve known has liked you for years, back into the space of your living room, just because you were starting to feel the shadows of Yeonjun’s absence on you...

✭ You let him tap his finger on your jaw and pull you in to softly kiss you, raw emotion bursting in your gut when Changbin pulls away, his fingers wiping away the tears that you cast

When Changbin places another kiss right on the corner of your lips, your heart melts and you sob, tucking into his chest for a chance to escape. “(Y/n), I don’t know why you’re still with him, but I promise I can treat you better.” You nod, closing your eyes as crimson paints your mouth, and after much thought, you say what you believe you deserve. “I–I’ll break up with him.”

✭ Yeonjun is more caring than ever when he comes back, and you wonder what happened in the span of a few months

✭ He stays behind more, helps you with the chores and you wake up every morning with his head snuggling the crook of your neck, placing kisses of love that you couldn’t find before

✭ He blamed it on the homesickness because you’re his home and he loves you very much

✭ And you blame it on the guilt and the bullshit

✭ But you can’t help getting the words out of your mouth and it scratches your throat as you stand next to him, in his embrace, where you find a bruise on his neck

✭ But you suppose fate was giving you one more chance when Yeonjun found Changbin’s sweater in your shared room

“(Y/n) whose is this? This definitely isn’t mine.” Yeonjun spits, throwing a bright blue sweater at your feet when you enter the room. Your eyes widen and you shake your head, mouth trembling when you pick it up. “It’s–it’s...” Looking at his furrowed brows you falter and take a step back. “I don’t know.” Yeonjun sneers, ‘Really? Is it not Changbin's? Do you really think I’m that dumb?!”

Tears leak down your cheeks when you realize that this is your chance. But you’re too afraid–you think. Too scared to imagine your life without Yeonjun. And so, you shake your head at his words, saliva slowly sticking your teeth close. “You’re such a fucking–” He bites his lips to stop his words and messes up his hair in frustration.

“Yeonjun...” You cry.

“What!” He barks.

“You can cheat on me back if you want to.”

Yeonjun’s lips quiver into a smile before it diminishes into a tight lip, slowly walking towards you to back you into the wall. “What kind of boyfriend would I be to do that? Cheat on my girlfriend? I’m not you, am I?” He chuckles, pulling back your hair when you look at his feet. “No, you’re not,” You say, softly pushing at his arm. “It’s whatever, sweetheart. I’m such a good boyfriend, not leaving you.”

You nod and clench your fists. “I’m so sorry Junnie. You’re an amazing boyfriend.”

✭ You don’t meet Changbin’s awaiting eyes when you and Yeonjun walk past him, figure trembling when Yeonjun flips him off

Beomgyu ˚ · • . ° .

✭ You and Beomgyu were complicated, but he doesn’t think so

✭ “He liked you” he would say, but he always seemed to ignore you in the eyes of the public, lips always tearing into a sneer when he found you staring at him with a rather pitiful look

✭ But why did he kiss you so softly every night, holding you in his arms when you cried to him about it

✭ You don’t understand him at times–he gives you severe whiplash and you’re not sure if it was intentional or not

✭ He gives and takes, and you’re exhausted when you watch him flirt with another girl in front of you but then drag you to the nearest alley because he missed your lips

✭ You’re not official in the eyes of his friends but you’re official in his heart–and it stabs you in the heart every single time when he acts like he cares

“You’re so pretty” He softly says, kissing the spot right below your ear when you turn around and face him. You have more to say, and he notices so he shuts you up with his lips. “Beomgyu I...” You pull apart and fiddle with his shirt, but he ignores your saddening mood, instead grabbing his phone. His eyes light up when someone texts him and you try to melt into the couch, shying away your gaze to the window. “Hey (Y/n), I have to go. I’ll text you later, kay?” He doesn’t even wait for your response and leaves the door shut in his wake.

✭ When Beomgyu leaves for a while, you come to an area of realization that him leaving you for a few months feels the same when he uses you like a toy–you’re alone in all the ways possible

✭ And you’re moping–which gets your friends confused and annoyed, so they’ve convinced you to go out with them for drinks

✭ Which ultimately ends up with you in the arms of an old friend that you haven’t seen in years, bringing Jaeyun back home with your lips tangled with his and his hands in your hair

✭ Yet you feel some sort of hole in your heart– and it aches and burns when his fingers expanse over your stomach and your neck

✭ When he leaves small kisses against your cheeks and forehead, while you two settles against the couch–the same couch where Beomgyu called you his so lovingly

✭ And it feels so wrong when he cuddles into your side, watching a movie that you supposed you loved when it was actually Beomgyu’s favorite

✭ So, when Jake quietly apologizes and says that he needed to pick up Heeseung because he shit-faced over a few drinks, you feel as though the rock on your chest had been lifted and you can suddenly breathe again

✭ But it’s back again, heavier than ever when you find Beomgyu ringing your doorbell just moments after, with a suitcase in hand and an angry tremor on his lips–which you just find so absurd

“Beomie, what...what are you doing–”

“Who was that?” He sputters, letting himself into your apartment. “No one.” Your mouth is clenched when you close the door behind him, cursing at yourself underneath your breath. “Seriously? No one?” He mocks, crossing his arms over when you don’t respond, but how could you when anger rolls off you and your nails dig into your skin? “I don’t know why you even care!” You yell, throwing a pillow at him in frustration.

“Ow! I–what do you mean I don’t care, of course I care!” You shake your head and grab his suitcase to take it back outside. “You’re always acting like I don’t exist when you’re with your friends but then you come back to me like nothing’s wrong! Are you embarrassed of me or something?”

“No of course not.”

“Then why?!” You stare at him for an answer, but he just looks at the ground, shuffling around with his feet. You sigh and tap your feet against the floor. “Whatever Beomgyu, just get the fuck out of my house.”

“Wait, (Y/n), I’m so sorry, I don’t know why–" His hands clasp around yours, pulling you back into him. "Just leave me alone, find another girl to cheat on with or something, because I'm done with your bullshit." You crack and suddenly you're being hugged, quivering when you start to cry.

"I'm so sorry."

Taehyun ˚ · • . ° .

✭ The first time you’ve ever cried over a movie was actually a Disney movie–Rapunzel at that

✭ And you were just sobbing because Flynn Rider loved Rapunzel and not you...which you quickly found out in a few years was a really stupid thing to cry over and served your mom a lifetime camera roll of videos that exemplified pure embarrassment

✭ But here you are now, almost 15 years later and tearing up over a boy (Jay Park) that you’ve had your eyes on for so long but can’t attain in a relationship

✭ Taehyun is in the same situation too, lost in the eyes of another girl (Yu Karina) whom he can’t help but admire

✭ So, when you sob to Hyuka about it, he immediately consults you to Taehyun and proposes a rather idiotic but genius plan that leaves you and the pink-haired boy nodding along idiotic but a genius plan that left you and the pink-haired boy nodding along

“You two should totally fake date! You know, like making whoever you want jealous. I think it would work out!” Kai’s loud and his words seem to echo inside your head while the boy you’ve met just a few moments ago stares at his friend with a rather interested look on his face.

“That’s not...a bad idea, actually.” He then turns towards you as you shy away into where you were sitting, looking back at Kai for help who does nothing but shrug. So, you sigh and slowly nod your head, growing a grin on Taehyun’s face. “Sure, why not. Wouldn’t hurt to try, I think.”

✭ Everyone was certainly shocked and surprised; eyes widening and several gasps falling from your friend’s lips (except for Kai) when you came out to everyone that you and Taehyun were dating–after some very detailed rules that you both agreed upon

✭ And it was nice you suppose, especially when you find Jay staring at your interlocked hands with Taehyun, or when you pretend to kiss him

✭ Yet sometimes, when Taehyun tucks your hair back and hugs you to his chest, your chest thrums a little in warmth and you long to indulge a little more in him

✭ You think you’re about to go insane–in turmoil, as your stomach aches each time you look at Jay and Taehyun, lips quivering at night at your feelings of love

✭ And oh god, it didn’t help that Taehyun was so nice to you, all gentlemanly-like while he pretended to care, pretended to love you as your own tenderness seemed to fester underneath your beating heart

✭ You were confused and hurt about yourself, so when Taehyun goes off for a while and you’re stuck at home, your fingers scratch at your skin for answers that you craved, bleeding at the tip of your tongue as Jay finally took his chance to kiss you in the back of a parking lot

✭ For a kiss you thought would be joyous, it was stale and gross when you recount it back sadly to Hyuka, cheeks red with shame when you see Jay’s text following up

✭ You weren’t exactly dating Taehyun so you haven’t done anything necessarily wrong, but the remnants of sourness burn your stomach, as though you were caught doing something so immoral

✭ When Taehyun comes back, you wish to cut off your lips so you wouldn’t tell him what had happened–but you quickly find out that your mutual friend had called him the very morning

The air is warm and mellow but inside your throat, it rages a storm of guilt and despise as you stare at Taehyun at the door, swaying softly on the balls of your feet when you both exchange greetings filled with unease. You’re being eaten alive, you presume when you let him in, knees becoming Jello when he sighs.

“You and Jay, huh?” He finally teases but his words don’t have a joking tilt to them, and rather are dull and blunt when it hits you. You’re not sure what to say, because you have millions to spew out to the boy next to you, a whirlwind of emotions that you want to express, but you stay silent and stare at your newly bought red boots next to the front door.

“It would’ve been nice if you told me earlier.”

“I’m sorry.” You softly whisper, not flinching at the way that his fingers rub at your knuckles. “It’s fine...I was going to ask you to ‘break up’ anyways, I didn’t think that it was working.” Your head shoots up at his words when you suddenly dawn on the situation at hand, on why your gut was churning so much when you kissed Jay.

It meant that this whole ordeal with Taehyun was going to disappear like nothing ever happened between you two. You also realize that you’re really fucking dumb when you reach out to grab his wrist, stopping him from getting up. His eyebrows raise and you feel bile in your mouth, swishing around as you try to figure out what to say.

“I–I don’t want you to leave.”

“Huh?”

You quickly shake your head, playing with the tiny rip flannel as you try not to erupt in a multitude of emotions. “I really don’t want you to leave. Just please–I... you can cheat on me if you want to, but please don’t leave me.” Your brain hurts when you think about him kissing another girl, but you’d do anything for him to be by your side, just for a little longer.

Taehyun furrows his brows and lets himself sit back down, taking your hands into his when you look away. “What’s going on?”

And finally, you sob. “I’m just so fucking sorry. I know I promised that I wouldn’t like you or whatever and that Jay was who I liked, but I can’t help it! And I really regret kissing him, and I really regret telling you to kiss another woman, because I’m going to be really fucking jealous–”

You’re shut up when Taehyun kisses you so softly, his hands tucking back a stray piece of hair from your face. “Taehyun...” You sigh, trembling against him when he wipes away a stray tear. “I like you too, pretty girl. But you promise you don’t like Jay anymore...”

Yoru heart clenches and your teeth grin but when he pulls you back into his chest, you nod.

“I promise.”

Kai ˚ · • . ° .

✭ Kai was your first sweetheart–the one that you suppose you’ve loved for your entire life without even knowing

✭ And oh god he’s so sweet, with honey eyes that never left you or a smooth tongue that spewed out countless messages of his love towards you with his tender fingers brushing a strand piece of hair away while you sat in his lap

✭ But as of now, your heart throbs with trouble and agony when you catch his faltering smile and when his plastic lips kiss you tightly, and you think that you’re going to sob–hard

✭ You assume that this was natural, feeling as though you were slowly breaking apart with him, but you find yourself praying over that it wasn’t, that you still love him as much as you did before

✭ But all that ended up doing was leave sour blood in your mouth from the number of times you bit your cheeks, hands tainted with guilt when you stared too long into the distance–just past your lover

✭ Falling out of love was maybe the best but you can’t seem to reason why

✭ Your teeth are starting to fall out and your head hurts as you try to wrap around the explanation–the revelation that’s making you and Kai feel this way

Your eyes hold tears that refuse to fall. Kai doesn’t notice and it hurts even more, but you sit next to him, watching the clock tick. You wonder if a clock was an animated object–would it get tired of its clicking? Tick Tock. Tick Tock. Tick Tock.

Your heart doesn’t beat faster anymore next to him, and you think that it got bored. When his fingers rub at your knees, rubbing in a scar, you do nothing but stare at the time. Time used to go fast but it’s dulled now into an inconsistent background noise of humming.

✭ Kai has never liked leaving you alone for so long nor did you, always whining on the phone for him to come back to you

✭ But now you find it almost melancholy when the house is empty and the thoughts of another don’t infiltrate the air–and so you breathe deeply

✭ You take fulfilling breaths that you couldn’t do, lips drawing into a smile when you eat breakfast or talk to your friends or when you start drinking bottles and bottles of Soju that leave you crying over lost love in the middle of the night

✭ It’s bad you know, but it’s the only way you know to cope, feeling alone in a maze that you were supposed to get through with Huening

✭You’ve never in your life thought about the prospect of cheating, not with Kai who was the world’s biggest lover

✭ But you think that you’ve just soiled your lips with the mouth of another, in a haze that you were slowly falling deeper and deeper into, desperately trying to climb yourself out before everything caved into itself

✭ You feel wrong and like throwing your guts back up when you realize what you had just done but you hadn’t drastically pale too much upon the thought even though you should have

✭ Your thoughts don’t run a million miles per hour, rather just a thousand but it’s still bad...

✭ Yet you come to a realization and a questionnaire after a cup tea and some crackers for your upset stomach–Would Kai even care?

✭ It shatters your heart though you know that the both of you are stringing the other on but can’t leave, like you’re addicted to a lasting bitter taste that resides just after a sugary smidge

✭ When he arrives back, you try your best not to slip up, though you really should

✭ An Instagram post spills your secret instead

You’re not crying, surprisingly. You really should be though when Kai sends you a screenshot of you in the background of Yeji’s picture kissing Sunghoon at a small dingy bar. You don’t respond to his text either, but walk solemnly back to your shared house, the smell of decaying love just on the tip of your nose.

And when you open the door, the smell wafts through the hall and the kitchen, where Kai sits at the dining table with a huge frown on his face. “I’m sorry.” That’s the first thing you utter when you walk inside. “You didn’t mean to, did you?” He asks and his words are like tiny daggers that prickle at your skin when you nod, pressing deeper and deeper as he stands up.

“(Y/n) I don’t know if I can do this anymore. I–I think I...” He trails off and tucks his lips under his teeth. Tears begin to well in his eyes and it hurts you to the point you can’t inhale. “I know. Me too” You whisper, pulling and teasing at a hangnail, sighing when you try to throw a watery smile at him.

“If you want to, you can...can cheat on me too. You know, kiss another girl, your choice.”

Kai chuckles. “That’s not healthy and you know that (Y/n). Maybe this was for the best.”

“So, are you just going to leave?” You ask, tonging at your raw cheeks.

He nods slowly and looks at you once more, straight in the eyes so you could flinch away from him. As though you’ve been slapped. “Yeah, I think so. For the best?”

“For the best.” The clock stops ticking.

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viperstrikes · 2 years ago

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SEND ME AN ANGEL (JJ Maybank)

➠ Pairing: JJ Maybank x Reader ➠ Genre: Angst, with a lil fluff ➠ Type: Series ➠ Trope: Soulmates ➠ Word count: 1,606 ➠ Warnings: abuse/mentions of abuse, trauma, swearing?, alcohol use, JJs (dickhead of a) father ➠ Summary: Soulmate trope where the bruises you get on your body matches your soulmates. If you get hurt, your soulmate will also get the bruise, and vice versa. ➠ Author Notes: I haven’t posted in a minute (like 6 years lololol) but let me know if y’all want a second part to this!

⟢⟢⟢⟢⟢⟢

It’s all so surreal, the way you find out who your soulmate is.

It happens in some sweaty, alcohol-stenched house in Pogues territory, a place you’ve called home for almost two years. You remember the music creating a rhythm in your bones, a sort of cloud fogging over your brain from how much of whatever the hell was in that punchbowl you had already downed. You came here with your friend Alice, and you were both on the dance floor having the time of your life.

You thought you guys looked stupid, but it still didn’t stop you.

Until, well...something else did.

It hits you sharply, the feeling sprouting from your lower abdomen so strongly that you stumble forward a little.

“Jesus,” Your hands dart to where you feel the bruise forming. “Not again.”

You knew what was happening, though, hell, given your soulmates track record, it was far from your first rodeo.

The first time you had ever received a bruise on your body—one that you knew wasn't caused by your childish antics—you were seven.

It happened suddenly, a powerful jolt shifting in your bones and the overwhelming sensation of something not being right following quickly after. It didn’t hurt—it was far from pain—but somehow, you knew in that moment that you’d rather experience pain a million times over than have to undergo the dull and almost numb feeling that made you feel so empty that you wanted to cry.

You ran to your mother, a blubbering mess while you rubbed at the bruise on your arm with an incoherent string of words tumbling out of your mouth. She had explained it to you then; opened you up into a world where soulmates existed. Where the bruises that seemingly appeared out of nowhere had meant that there was someone who was meant for you. Where the person you were bound to collide with was your other half. Your missing piece.

And you hated it.

But it wasn't the idea of soulmates that you hated. You didn’t mind having comfort in knowing that someone out there had the same fate string as yours.

Your issue was that your soulmate seemed to be a careless, chaotic idiot. Most people are careful, most people know that the second they get a bruise that their soulmate will sport a matching one, but your other half seems to be completely insensitive.

Even now, as you stand in the middle of a crowd but somehow feel more lonely than ever, that much is apparent.

You don’t feel like dancing anymore, and so you hurriedly break off from Alice - she doesn’t seem to notice, which, thank God - to get some space.

You trek up the stairs - pushing past a couple who’re sucking face, and pull open the first door you see, the world sounding like a murmur behind the door when you close it.

But then,

“Whoa, you ever heard of knocking?” The voice is only a sliver of familiar, if anything, but it’s enough to get you to turn around to see that you’ve taken refuge in a bathroom, and that JJ Maybank, of all people, is shirtless and staring at you through the mirror in front of him with an incredulous expression crossing his features.

“Oh.” You still, taking note of the blood in the sink and his shaky hands, but not staring for longer than you should.

The last and only time you spoke to the guy was a few months after you moved here last year, where you quickly realized how awfully smart mouthed he was. From what you heard, he got into trouble, was a bit rowdy, and has broken one too many hearts, but he’s somehow completely private about his personal life; keeps to himself a lot and really only socializes with the only three friends he seems to have.

“Yeah, oh, sweetheart,” JJ breaks eye contact with you and tenses his jaw, grabbing the rag on the side of the sink and dabbing it around his lower abdomen.

It’s then that you notice the bruise blooming on the surface of his skin; a bruise formed in the same place you’re feeling completely hollow in on your own body. You think it’s a coincidence, but when you see another fading bruise on JJ’s wrist - one you woke up to last week - your breath hitches a bit.

You expect the realization to hit you in some sort of way, get you excited or tingly or warm or even nervous. Something, anything. But JJ looks too angry and was obviously hurt, notably enough that the only thing you can wonder isn’t if JJ is your soulmate - the soulmate you’ve been waiting for - but rather why the pain you feel from the bruise suddenly hurts twice as bad.

You quickly look away, and you decide that it’s to let JJ hesitantly continue inspecting the wound - something that makes him hiss and wince and swear.

Definitely not because of the real possibility that you and JJ could be...

“I’m...so sorry, I didn’t know anyone was in here-” You tried again, but JJ pointedly cuts you off.

“Well someone is in here,” He's irritated. And a bit drunk, you note. But there’s something a bit off about the expression he wears on his face. Like he’s...weary.

You don’t blame him.

“Right,” You say, but there’s a foreign feeling pooling in your stomach and you find yourself stepping forward. JJ pauses then, eyeing you like you’d just done something stupid, a bit of drunken scrutiny laced in his eyes.

You ignore it. “I could help. Y’know, with...” You gesture towards his chest, “My moms a nurse so I know a few things.”

JJ doesn’t miss a beat to turn around and face you, silent but still wincing from the pain. The bruise looks worse in that light, like it stings and itches, but JJ doesn’t look phased about it at all. He just looks at you through a stoic-faced expression, jaw tightened - but, he nods, eventually. And you’re honestly really… surprised at that.

It takes you a few minutes, but you eventually get his wound cleaned and bandaged up, trying desperately to hide any sort of panic or discomfort that starts to grow alongside the bruise on your own skin. It feels the same as it always does, but different. Somehow.

Maybe it’s because you know who it belongs to this time. And that knowledge comes bottled with way too many questions that you don’t think JJ can handle at the moment. He looks too lost; somewhere deep diving into the pits of his mind, body slumped against the bathroom counter as he begins to pull his t-shirt back on.

The last thing you need to do is psych him out with the truth of knowing that you’re it. “The One”. Someone the universe had picked out for him.

“So, what was so urgent that you didn’t stop to check if the bathroom was occupied before going into it?” JJ breaks the silence, but there’s no malice to his words. Just a bit of amusement and a lot of curiosity.

“I-uh…” You don’t know what to say, or how to say it, really. JJ looks too tired and you don’t want to blurt out that you think you’re his soulmate - and even worse, that you’re fucking scared of the odds because it’s JJ Maybank. He has a rep with girls, and he doesn’t seem serious about...well, anything.

Except for maybe whatever had given him that bruise and gotten him looking pale and dim-eyed at this stupid, stupid party.

“Just needed to get away from everyone for a bit,” You give him a small smile, hoping it’s enough. And apparently, it is. At-least judging by the way he relaxes a bit, like he’s not on edge anymore.

“Yeah, these things suck ass sometimes,” He pulls something from his pocket and - oh. Blunt and lighter. “Don’t blame you at all. Shits stuffy,” He takes a few puffs after lighting it, lolling his head back before outstretching his hand and offering you some.

You blink, almost denying it before you figure that it could help you ease up; especially with you still trying to hold down the urge to cry because of how bad the bruise has made you feel this time around.

You wonder briefly if he feels it too, underneath the actual pain of it all.

“You gonna be okay?” You ask quietly, handing the joint back to him.

There’s genuine surprise in his face when you say that, and you pretend that you don’t notice the curious gaze he gives you - like there’s something about you he can’t quite pinpoint.

And - yeah. If only he knew.

“I’ll be fine. Always am.” He reassures, jaw a little slack, and then adds on hesitantly: “Thanks for the help, and for not asking questions or freaking out.”

“Course,” You nod like it’s that simple. Like you two have known each other for years and this was a common occurrence. Like there was nothing strange about sitting in a bathroom with JJ Maybank and getting high. “It was my fault for barging in, but I won’t tell anyone. Promise,” You hold your pinky finger in the air, and JJ raises a brow at you.

He seems to be pondering over something, but he decidedly reaches forward to lock his pinky with yours. He’s warm, and now that your thoughts have died down a little, you notice in this proximity that he smells a lot like a bonfire.

“Guess it’s a promise, then.”

⟢⟢⟢⟢⟢⟢

#jj maybank #outer banks #outer banks imagine #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank x reader #jj mayback x reader #*#smaa: 1 #send me and angel

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the-cult-of-riley · 10 months ago

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Sleeping With Ghosts (Act one: Chapter Fourteen)

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Female OC

[[Masterlist]]

A/N: I’ve decided not to put a song with every single chapter because there’s a fuck tonne of them and it’s getting harder to pick ones lmao I have a few saved for certain chapters, songs I listened to when I wrote them etc but from now on, there won’t be a song with every single one. Mostly because my OCD brain decided to only pick Placebo or NIN songs which is making my life harder lololol That being said, this chapter, ironically, does have a song lmao

Also, it took me an ungodly amount of time to realise how much of myself I put into Charlotte :’)

Placebo - I’ll Be Yours

I'll be your water bathing you clean

The liquid piece

I'll be your ether you'll breathe me in

You won't release

Well I've seen you suffer, I've seen you cry the whole night through

So I'll be your water bathing you clean

Liquid blue

I'll be your father, I'll be your mother

I'll be your lover, I'll be yours

I'll be your liquor bathing your soul

With juice that's pure

And I'll be your anchor you'll never leave

Shores that cure

Well I've seen you suffer, I've seen you cry for days and days

So I'll be your liquor demons will drown

And float away

I'll be your father, I'll be your mother

I'll be your lover, I'll be yours

Yours

The cold autumn breeze blew through the front garden and Simon glanced to his left, eyeing his companion as she wrung her hands nervously, her eyes wide as saucers. She had a look reminiscent of Privates going on their first ever tour, convinced they wouldn't make it back.

“Just breathe, love,” he murmured and he felt like a right bastard for putting her in this situation. He’d been back a week now and he’d been staying with her most nights but not all, didn't want to annoy her too much. But he’d mentioned how his family wanted to meet her because his mum wouldn't stop fucking nagging him about it and honestly, he wanted them to meet.

She’d been shocked for some reason he couldn't fathom but she’d been more than happy to agree. He’d decided it was best to split it up, not wanting to overwhelm her with too many people and knowing how Tommy can be. He settled on his mum first who wanted to cook dinner for her. After hearing Charlotte’s favourite food was bolognese, that's what she settled on making and he knew from experience his mum's bolognese was fucking mint. He planned on taking her to a pub to meet Tommy and Beth the next day, somewhere more neutral and a little less over the top so she could handle his baby brother who was a frantic ball of energy on the best of days.

Right now though, they were outside his mother’s house as Lottie seemed to suddenly realise what was about to happen and she had some sort of existential crisis. He felt bad for putting this on her now seeing how utterly nervous she was. Poor girl was shitting herself.

“It’ll be alright, Lottie,” he murmured, rubbing her back soothingly as she looked up at him with those wide, scared eyes.

“What if she doesn't like me? What if I say something she doesn't like and then she hates me and then you’ll hate me and-” she rambled anxiously and he pressed a hand over her mouth to stop her.

“Get outta that head of yours, Charlotte. Mum loves you already and she hasn't even met you yet and she's as soft hearted as they come. There's nothin’ you could do to make her hate you. And even if you did somehow, doesn't mean I’d give two shits, does it?” he asked, trying to calm her mind. He really hadn't expected her to get so worked up about it but then again, she had no parents of her own, did she? This whole thing must have been alien to her.

Her breathing was all over the place and the hand on her mouth moved to settle over her chest, rubbing it gently as if he could stimulate her lungs to function at a normal capacity. She started to take slow and deep breaths and he really looked at her. Despite the panic all over her, she looked beautiful. She’d settled on a sage green polar neck sweater and some black jeans. Her hair was down and wavy, a pretty clip of a raven pinning the side of her hair up and away from her face.

“I’m sorry,” she frowned once she got her breathing under control and he moved to press a kiss to her forehead.

“Don’t be sorry, it’s a big step for us. Just take it at your pace. If this is too much, we can go back to yours,” he said softly and he meant it too. Even if he would be disappointed, he wouldn't mind, it’d do no good to push her into something she wasn't ready for. She shook her head vehemently at his words, laying her hand over his on her chest.

“No! I… I want to be here, it’s just… I get overwhelmed easy, I guess,” her brows were pinched together and he didn't need to be inside of that pretty head of hers to know she was mentally berating herself for feeling this way. Those three little words almost fell from his lips, the urge to tell her, to reassure her burrowing its way into his brain. He ignored the urge though, now wasn't the time to fuck everything up.

“Just take some breaths and we’ll go in, yeah? I promise she’s nice, you got nothin’ to worry about,” as if on cue, the front door swung open and his mother stood there in a knee length floral dress, her shorter hair styled all nice, showing him she really made an effort for this and it warmed his chest.

She eyed the couple, her eyes shining with something Simon was unsure of as a smile spread on her face. It was then he realised his hand was still over Charlotte's chest and her hand was over his. It wasn't sexual by any means but it was definitely an intimate moment his mother had stumbled upon. Loving even. Maybe that's why she was giving him that look from the doorway. Charlotte stood there like a deer caught in the headlights as if his mother was a big fucking truck about to slap into her.

“Charlotte! It's so lovely to meet you!” his mother beamed, stepping out of the door. Charlotte relaxed a little, a shy smile tugging at her lips as Simon put a hand on her lower back and guided her to the door.

“You too, Mrs Riley,” she replied quietly.

“Oh, no need for formalities, hun. Just call me Anne,” she smiled and moved to give Charlotte a hug. Simon watched carefully, his heart thumping a little too wildly in his chest for his liking as he started to panic it would be too much for his girl. She hugged his mum back though and when they moved away he noticed her pink tinged cheeks.

“Our Simon told us you love spaghetti so that's what I’ve made. I don't know if it’ll be as good as you're used to, but my boys love it,” his mum babbled, acting like she hadn't seen another human in months and was so excited to see one.

She ushered the both of them in the house and Simon guided her to the living room/dining room. The large table was on the far side, already set out with placemats and a basket of fucking garlic bread in the middle. She never usually went this all out but maybe it was a big deal, being his first girlfriend and all.

“You two sit down, I'm just plating up,” his mum told them as she left the room to go into the kitchen. He glanced at Lottie, seeing her standing rigidly in her spot like she was made of stone.

“Wanna see a picture?” he asked, desperate to take her mind somewhere else so she’d finally relax. She turned her eyes to him then, nodding as she chewed her lower lip restlessly.

He led her over to the fireplace despite his mum’s previous insistence of sitting down, led her right to a framed picture on it. He grabbed it, a wistful smile on his face as he held it between them so she could peer at it. It was of him about 13 years old, holding Tommy upside down by his ankles, the pair with matching grins. He didn't often get to smile in his childhood but on the rare occasions his dad fucked off on a long bender, it happened.

He didn't have many pictures of being a baby or a child because of how rough everything was and it was something his mum had expressed regret over time and time again. He couldn't tear his gaze away from her as her eyes scanned the photo and her lips tugged up in amusement. He was relieved to see she was capable of calming down after all.

“You’ve always been a little shit, then,” she stated wryly and he chuckled, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and pulling her close to him as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

Movement out of the corner of his eye tore his eyes off her to the doorway, seeing his mum standing there with two plates in her hand. He wasn't sure how long she’d been standing there but she had this soft look in her eyes as she observed the pair of them, a warm and tender smile gracing her face as her eyes met his. His chest felt a little tight and he quickly looked away, dropping the arm from around Lottie as he suddenly became self conscious of having an audience.

His mum cleared her throat, breezing into the room as if she hadn't been peeping at them like their relationship was the next best soap opera. Simon guided her to the table and they sat side by side, his mother coming back with her own plate and sitting opposite them.

“Well, Charlotte, tell me about yourself. Simon’s been so embarrassed, I feel like I don’t know much,” his mum started with a smile and Simon’s eyes could have fallen from their sockets.

“Mum!” he chided, a stupefied look on his face as he shook his head.

“What?! I don't mean embarrassed of the relationship but you’ve been so hush hush. God knows it's your first relationship, Simon, it's okay to be feeling out of sorts,” she huffed and Simon wanted a hole to open up from the ground and swallow him whole. He was glad he’d told her about not having a girlfriend beforehand or this would have been a fucking uncomfortable dinner.

“She’s here for dinner, not a fuckin’ interrogation,” he bit out and his mum narrowed her eyes at him in exasperation. He didn't mean to be a dick but Charlotte had already been panicking, he didn't want to make it worse with his mother’s prying. Didn't need the girl getting spooked and running off.

“It’s okay,” Charlotte spoke up softly, looking at him pleadingly. The look very much said ‘please stop’ and he knew he was the one making it worse right now. He blew out a breath, giving his mum a firm look before he looked back at Lottie and his eyes softened immensely.

“I just don’t want you to be uncomfortable, love,” he murmured apologetically. She gave him a little smile and he felt her nudge her leg into his under the table. A small gesture that let him know she appreciated him looking out for her.

“I’m not trying to make her uncomfortable, Simon. I just… I’m excited to get to know her,” his mother added, only making his guilt get worse. There were a fair few times in his life where he’d snap at his mother and feel like an utter twat afterwards over it.

“I know, mum… I know. Sorry, I’m just…” he frowned, feeling like he’d ruined the dinner before any of them had even eaten anything. His mother reached out, a smaller hand settling over his own and he glanced at her, seeing her soft and affectionate look aimed at him.

“You're protective, it's sweet,” she murmured and he felt heat creep up his face. He figured it was best to just eat his fucking food now and keep out of it before he dug himself a hole and buried himself in it.

They all ate, Charlotte telling him mum bits and pieces about herself and answering questions as they did. He felt himself slowly start to unwind, muscles uncoiling with each passing moment. His mum got a little less overbearing and Lottie got a little more relaxed the more she spoke. By the time dinner was done, the pair of women were smiling and chatting away while Simon sat at the table watching, a warmth starting in his chest and spreading through his entire body. It was nice, seeing them getting along like this.

“I’ll go sort the dishes out, mum,” he said when there was a slight lull in conversation, not wanting to interrupt.

“Alright, pet,” she smiled at him and he piled the plates up on top of one another. He stood up, leaning down and placing a kiss to Charlotte’s head without a thought.

He disappeared into the kitchen, washing the dishes in the sink as he felt pleased it had gone well. He was glad Tommy and Beth weren’t here though, he was sure Lottie would have had a fucking aneurysm if they had been. He was still nervous for that exchange, but one at a time. He hadn't really known just how much it meant to him, having Charlotte and his mum get along like this, it felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders and he felt weightless. He was so lost in thought when he was drying and putting away the dishes that he jumped when the kitchen door opened. His mother walked in, a smile on her face.

“I really love her, Simon. It's easy to see why you do,” she breathed, batting him out of the way and taking over with putting the plates away.

“Mum,” he sighed, giving her a sharp look before he glanced to the door worriedly.

“She can’t hear us from here. And you should tell her anyway, you two are head over heels for each other,” she tutted. He knew she cared about him, he wasn't stupid, but his treacherous brain had a hard time believing she actually loved him. Not the way he did her.

“Thanks for dinner, mum,” he murmured sincerely and her face softened at his tone. If anyone could read him, it was his mother.

“Don’t mention it, just make sure you bring her around again,” she pointed an accusing finger at him and he raised his hands up in mock surrender.

“I will,” he answered and she nodded, looking pleased with herself.

“When is Tommy meeting her?” she asked curiously, turning to face him.

“Tomorrow. Gonna meet him and Beth at the pub in town we usually go to,” he explained.

“Just make sure you warn her beforehand, you know how Tommy gets,” she snorted fondly and he chuckled.

“‘Course I do,” amusement coloured his tone as he thought of his baby brother. He was pretty sure he never really grew up with the amount of energy he still had, it was insane.

“I’ll let you two get back then, you’ll both need rest for tomorrow and I think she’s probably had enough stress for one day,” the tea towel got chucked on the counter with her words and he nodded.

“You just want us to fuck off,” he replied cheekily and she gave him a dirty look.

“Mind your language, you cheeky shit,” she squinted and his lips quirked up before he left the room, his mum hot on his heels. Charlotte was sitting at the now empty table and he felt a little bad about leaving her on her own, despite knowing she probably appreciated a moment to herself.

“Right, love. You ready?” he asked her and she nodded, standing up and swiping at invisible crumbs on her jumper. He hadn't been sure how long they'd stay for but he was pretty sure his mother wanted rid of them because her soaps were about to start and she never missed an episode.

“Thanks for dinner, Mrs- Anne,” she corrected herself quickly, cheeks slightly pink as he guided her to the front door and opened it.

“No need to thank me and you’re welcome here anytime, you both are,” his mum’s words were punctuated by a pointed look at him and he knew she wanted to see more of him, of them both.

She leaned in to give Charlotte a hug, murmuring about how she couldn't wait to see her again and Charlotte nodded. Poor girl was flustered when she pulled away, he was sure she wasn't used to people paying her such attention. His mum moved over to him then, wrapping her arms around his middle and giving him a squeeze. He hugged her back and tried to ignore the pinching in his chest that always seemed to accompany him when he visited her.

“I love you, Simon,” she murmured quietly and the pinching got worse.

“Love you too, mum. Be by again soon, yeah?” His voice was low and soft and she moved away with a smile and an eager nod.

“I look forward to it. You both stay safe on the way home.'' With those parting words, Simon grasped Charlotte’s hand and led her down the path and out of the front garden.

She was quiet as they walked to the bus stop and he kept stealing glances at her.

“Alright, love?” he asked hesitantly as they sat waiting for the bus. He still had that worry that it had been too much for her, that despite her smiles when she was there, that she’d hated it.

“I’m okay. Today’s just been… a lot. It was good though, we got along. She likes me… I think,” her frantic eyes turned to him then, wide and pleading and he smiled, bringing her hand to his mouth and kissing it.

“She loved you, sweetheart. No need to worry,” he replied easily and it seemed to settle her right away. A relieved smile painted her face and her tension seemed to melt.

“You want a bath when you get in?” he asked her as he toyed with her fingers.

“You just want to get me naked,” she snorted impishly and he rolled his eyes playfully.

“Never gonna turn down an opportunity to get you naked, sweetheart, but I’m more concerned with makin’ sure you're not stressed out,” he murmured and her impish smile turned into something more sweet, those pretty blue eyes sparkling at him.

“I’m fine but I wouldn't say no to a bath,” she replied, blinking her long lashes up at him. He couldn't tear his eyes away, his heart turning to nothing but mush inside of his chest the longer he looked. She was like the opposite of Medusa, instead of turning him to stone, she was turning him into nothing but jelly.

Simon was happy, very fucking happy. In his current situation, he realised he’d been right to have Lottie meet his mum first, breaking the ice in meeting his family so to speak. She’d been nervous as they headed out to the pub, of course she had, but it hadn’t been as bad as when they’d gone to dinner at his dear old mum’s house. He wondered if part of it had been wanting to win his mum over more than Tommy. He’d told her a lot more about his brother and his antics and how he got on with everyone, so maybe it was less daunting than trying to win over his mum. He’d heard stories of nightmare mother in laws before who were weird with their sons and shit, maybe Charlotte had thought his mum would get possessive or something. Not that his mum was her mother in law, they weren't close to being married and the idea of popping that question to her was dizzying when he couldn't even get the balls to tell her he loved her.

Right now though, he, Lottie, Tommy and Beth were all sitting around a table in the pub, and right now, he felt like he was looking at a different person to the girl from the day before. Surprisingly, Tommy had behaved himself although there were a few embarrassing stories he just had to get in there but he’d kick the shit out of him later. But other than that, he hadn't been over the top and Simon was grateful, he knew his brother was reigning in it for a reason.

Lottie had really taken to Beth, maybe it was a girl thing or something or maybe she missed having that dynamic since her last best mate had fucked her boyfriend. Either way, the girls hadn’t stopped talking since they got here to the point that Tommy kept whining about how Beth was hogging Charlotte, the boy practically pouting. Things had been going smoothly, so smoothly in fact that he was pretty sure he jinxed himself while he sat there happy with the outcome.

The switch in her had been so minute that Tommy and Beth hadn't even clocked onto it, but he had. Of course he fucking had, there wasn’t a damn thing he wouldn’t notice about her. He couldn't quite place what set off his radar because she still continued to converse with Beth, still laughed at Tommy’s shitty jokes and still smiled, but maybe that was it. Her smile suddenly didn't reach her eyes, those blue eyes that had been just a moment ago vibrant and alive now dulled.

It made him anxious, worried about what had bothered her, wondered if his brother or Beth had said something that had somehow upset her. He couldn’t look away from her, his brain obsessing over where the fuck it had gone wrong. He didn't like it at all, didn't like her feeling uncomfortable or upset, didn't like not knowing the cause. He was half a moment away from telling Tommy and Beth they were going home and dragging her back to hers to get it out of her when she stood up, excusing herself to the bathroom.

Anxiety was eating him up from the inside out and his baby brother was none the wiser as he rubbed Beth’s now large belly and spoke in hushed tones to her. He drummed his fingers restlessly on the table before he got up too, not even bothering to say anything as he went to the back of the pub where the toilets were. He couldn't sit there and just allow this to happen, not if something was bothering her. He needed to find out what was going on and how the fuck he could fix it.

Charlotte blinked at her reflection for a moment, taking a long and steadying breath as she tried to get her head together. She hated her own mind sometimes, hated how it was ruining what had been a good night. It had been far less scary to meet Tommy and Beth and with how nice Anne had been, she hadn't been as nervous about it. She liked Tommy, had enjoyed witnessing him and Simon banter and try to upstage each other with terrible jokes and Beth had been lovely. She’d really gotten along with Beth and she hoped Beth liked her too, it was nice having a friend again. So why was her own mind trying to put a downer on the whole thing?

She took another deep inhale, telling herself to get it together. She didn't want to be that person, the wet blanket that always ruined the mood or a decent time. It was hardly a good impression if that was the case and Simon would soon tire of her and her overactive mind. She exited the bathroom to come face to face with the man in question and her heart faltered. He was leaning on the wall opposite the door, thick arms crossed over his broad chest. She tried to give him a smile as she walked the little distance between them.

“You alright?” He asked carefully. She should have known he'd pick up on her mood shift, he was crazy perceptive of everything.

“I'm fine,” she tried, getting narrowed eyes for her trouble that told her he wasn't buying it. He shifted on his feet, suddenly looking unsure of himself.

“If it's .. if this is too much then… then we can go back-” he started fumbling with an anxious frown, unable to meet her eyes. Her chest ached at the idea of him thinking he or his family had caused her upset. It may have triggered it but it was her own past haunting her.

“No! It's not…I-” she cut him off, mouth floundering as she tried to find the words. He relaxed but only minutely, dark eyes glued to her as if he was trying to see through her skull and into her brain. Trying to figure out just what was going on with her.

“It's stupid,” she sighed, feeling a twinge of heat bloom on her cheeks. She felt embarrassed for feeling the way she did, it was so inconsequential in the grand scheme of things.

“Let's get some air, yeah?” He asked, his tone telling her it was more of a command than a suggestion.

Before she could answer, he took her hand, leading her through the pub. He quickly passed by the table, letting Tommy and Beth know he wanted to go for a smoke before gently tugging her along outside. She’d found out in her time with him that he didn't smoke too often, he’d referred to himself as a social smoker. The air was crisp but not too cold and he moved them to sit on the wall surrounding the pub.

They sat side by side and she sat in silence as he smoked. She knew he was waiting for her to start talking but she wasn't sure how to bring it up without sounding like a whiny baby. His family had been nothing but kind to her and she knew she was being ridiculous. He gave her the space she needed until he was done with his smoke, stubbing it out and tossing it in the bin not too far from them. Decidingly having enough of her silence, he finally spoke up.

“Talk to me, Lottie,” he pleaded, taking her hand and pulling it to his lap.

“I told you, it's stupid,” she frowned softly, eyes glued to his fingers of his other hand that were slowly gliding up her forearm. They were tracing soothing patterns on her skin.

“It's not stupid. You're upset and I wanna know why,” he said firmly and she nibbled her lower lip for a moment. She blew out a breath, eyes still watching his fingers as she swallowed thickly.

“It's just… I've had a nice time and I started to realise that I don’t… I don’t have anyone to introduce you to and it's just… depressing. I met someone amazing and I’m excited about it and I don't have a single person to tell,” she lamented.

In the past, she’d at least had Jessica to talk to about things like this, about anything she was excited about, but now she had no one. She had Simon but she couldn't exactly talk to him about himself, could she? It had just made her realise how isolated she was, how miserable and lonely her life was.

“Charlotte…” he murmured sadly and she shook her head, blinking rapidly before the tears could start. She was already embarrassing herself enough, she wasn't about to cry in front of him.

“No, it's fine. I know that it's stupid, I guess it just hit me how alone I am,” she rambled.

“I wish that I could go back and change your past, change it so you don't feel so alone… But you've got me now. You never have to be alone again, I promise you that,” he insisted and she gave him a watery smile that didn't meet her eyes.

“You can't promise me that, Simon. You're in the army, anything could happen to you,” she uttered darkly, causing a deafening silence between them as his fingers stilled on her skin.

“You worry about that?” He asked in a low voice, sounding like he'd never considered it. It was her own fault really. She'd never voiced those very real fears she had, never made it known that him being in the military bothered her. It wasn't like she wanted him to get out or anything but it was something that always lingered in the periphery of her mind.

“Of course I do. Thought about it all the time when you were gone,” she admitted with a frown, unable to look at him. Those six months had been hell for her and knowing it would come again soon enough made her feel sick.

“Why didn't you say anything?” He asked, voice guarded and it made her frown deepen.

“What was I supposed to say? We both know the risks of you being there, it's just part of the package. Doesn't mean I don't worry about you though,” she huffed and he sighed, moving to put his arm around her.

“Don't need to worry about me, love. As long as I've got you to come home to, nothin’ll stop me,” he said sweetly, and while she knew it was a ridiculous statement and something so far out of his control, it still made her smile up at him that he was trying.

“I'll hold you to that,” she murmured, making him smile as he leaned down and placed a soft kiss to her lips.

“You and Beth seemed to get on well… maybe you two could become friends. Maybe that might help,” he uttered, nuzzling her temple softly and she nodded.

“I hope so, she’s really nice,” she replied, leaning into him more. “I’m sorry if I ruined the night for you,” she frowned, anxiety prickling at her.

“Didn't ruin anythin’, yeah? Wish you didn't feel the way you do but it's also understandable. You can always talk to me though, Lottie. Don’t want you keepin’ shit like this from me. I need to know when my girl’s sad so I can try and make it better,” he insisted and she felt a smile pulling at her lips at his words. His girl. It made her feel all soft and mushy on the inside.

“I know, I’m sorry. This whole thing is different to what I’m used to,” she confessed and she knew that he’d know exactly what she was getting at. Talking about her feelings in her last relationship hadn't happened because her feelings hadn't mattered.

“Well, you need to get used to it. You're important to me and I need to know you're alright,” he kissed her head again as if it would kiss some sense into her and she smiled to herself. She still couldn't quite fathom how she landed a man like Simon.

They sat like that for a moment longer as she allowed her sadness to ebb away, replaced by Simon’s tenderness. Maybe she was a little isolated right now but she had Simon and some potential friends in Tommy and Beth, some potential family in Anne. Maybe soon she wouldn't feel so alone, maybe by the time of his next deployment she would have people in her life to make it a little less lonely.

“Ready to go back in?” He asked after a while and she nodded. She was glad to get some things off her chest and now she just wanted to enjoy herself a little longer. Maybe she and Beth could meet up sometimes, become friends like Simon said.

When they stood up, she leaned up on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his lips. She felt him smile into the kiss as he grabbed her face and deepened the kiss. When he pulled away, he looked so happy, his dark eyes radiant and it made her stomach flutter.

“Thank you,” she murmured with a soft smile, hoping her eyes could convey what her words couldn't, not yet. His face softened even more, looking at her with that expression that always made her melt.

“No need to thank me, love,” he replied, giving her a tender smile before he led her back into the pub. She still had a long way to go with all her issues and insecurities but she was glad she had Simon by her side to help her through it.

#simon riley x oc #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost riley x oc #ghost x oc

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