#adhd struggle

[angelsonthesideline]

[coldblooded-angel]

Someone teach me to have the endurance and stamina for long fics because holy shit i have an au i want to write but my adhd is a looming threat to all my wips

[confused-mortal-being-ft-adhd]

Do other audhd people also deal with head empty but also there are bees in my head??

[nootcatt]

*Me at the start of my job*: this is temporary, I will leave in a few months, just until I can go back to the prior routine.

*me, continuing the job past the few months*: wth, why am I still here? This was temporary!

*me, now that I have to leave the job at the end of the month*: noooo I don't want to leave, I just developed a routine around this!!!

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

yay water

time to drink water woo hoo yay

[amalgamationillustration]

Today is a big ADHD shame day. Either my meds aren't working any more or I've somehow fucked up my life whilst on them. I'm pretty sure they're not working and I have an appointment in just over a month but god today I feel like shit.

I've gained back most of the weight I lost and I'm not in shape any more even though I felt amazing with how consistent I was with exercising. My joints and asthma are shit now again and it's literally my fault. The worst part is I'm not even that overweight but it just doesn't take much for my body to feel the struggle of it. It also sucks because really to be and maintain the weight I felt the best at I'd only need to cut like 200 calories max a day, but I just can't consistently maintain actually logging my food without getting bored, forgetting or realising I'm over so there's no point doing the rest that day. I dont then proceed to overeat after that but I just think eugh its gonna make me feel bad and some days it's unavoidable especially when I have such a small margin for deficit. Because I'm not super overweight, a big deficit isn't reasonable or realistic so I'm not going to start cutting back insane amounts, but weirdly its harder to just lose a smaller amount than it was when I was bigger.

I also feel like I'm bad at friendships and I've had one recently that's devolved because we just have different communication styles, I communicate too much and too often and she communicated less frequently and less consistently and so I always end up annoying her with my hyperactivity and she annoys me when she asks me to be less which is so hard when I have 0 self control skills, especially when my meds are out of action seemingly.

With my other friendships I've always struggled with making myself overly available for people and finding they then rely on that and start only really talking to me to tell me bad news or to complain and they actively disengage when I'm happy or successful at something. And I'm trying to avoid repeating the same patterns but it's hard to push people away when I know I can be there but in doing so I don't notice when its suddenly become all encompassing. I also struggle with friends not living near, not replying to messages cause they also have ADHD, not committing to hang outs which makes me stop trying. I have dreams about friends I've lost touch with because they're otherwise occupied with other friends or other things and I just feel like I fall so far down the priority list for some people that I'd list much higher.

The only reason my spending isn't out of control is because I cleared my debt and closed my credit accounts, if I hadn't I'd have already dipped back into them and I'm having to actively fight myself not to take out new lines of credit just to get dopamine purchases.

I'm just so eughh at the moment, I can't motivate myself to do anything, everything feels like it's either unrewarding work or it's something I shouldn't be engaging in because it's something I'm trying to be better at. So it's like I don't wanna get up and overeat for dopamine, and I don't want to spend money I don't have, but because I don't have any dopamine I also can't get up and do things I need to do. It's driving me fucking insane.

The worst part is knowing exactly what I need to do or should do because its what I've done when my meds work, and just still not doing it because my brain is too dopamine deprived to do something not bad for me that will give me dopamine. And if I do manage it I can't manage it for more than a few days. All I can manage is bed rot. Then I don't spend money or over eat or annoy anyone but I also don't get anything done that might help I'm so mad at myself it's so dumb and its not normally this bad. I am lucky to get an hour out of each of my meds each day, like I take short acting and it's meant to last 4 hours and I'm blessed if each one gives me an hour so I can have 3 useful hours a day, at a push.

[mychemicalissuues]

I hate my body demanding food, like shut up I'm busy, also you hate all foods we have

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Hygiene as an Autistic and ADHDer

A.J’s Brain

[fandomsandfeminism]

A reminder that food is morally nuetral.

That unless a food is literally poison or an allergy, it is not a bad food.

Your body needs carbs.

Your body needs fats.

Your body needs calories.

Maybe you struggle with moderation or getting the variety of nutrients you need to feel your best, but that does not make the foods you regularly eat bad.

Put the dressing on your salad. Add the cheese to the sandwhich. Grab a cookie to have with lunch. Add an egg to your instant Ramen. Mix M&Ms and teddy grams and roasted peanuts into your cup of yogurt. Put whipped cream on your coffee. Add frozen strawberries or Boba pearls to your iced tea. Sprinkle tajin onto your fruit cup.

Food must fuel your soul as well as your body. It is doesn't need to be a battleground. It can be a joy.

[celosiaceo]

Bashing my head in thinking about blorbos instead of work cant make myself work sobs

[laestoica]

[angelsonthesideline]

[lesbian-disaster-academic]

not relaxing, not doing work, but a secret third thing (screaming in my head while doomscrolling)

[seweage-monster]

All of you complain about overstimulation and sensory overload

We need to talk about under stimulation. I’m not saying I want to be overloaded with information. No I mean when I get panic attacks because there is not enough self stimulation in a situation. I have to walk out of meetings to pace around and think to calm myself down because my fight or flight response has activated from being not being able to stim.

I get so anxious when I cannot listen to music or have something playing in the background because I need stimulation that I choose to have and which I have control over

It physically hurts my brain.

[tunaricebowl]

i don’t know which autistic/adhd/any kind of neurodivergent person needs to hear this but: make a “just in case” bag

this is a pic of mine. it contains:

loop earplugs on the zipper

prescription glasses with a clip on sunglasses attachment

my public transport discount card

a pen

a glasses cloth + wet glasses wipes (which can also be used to clean my hands if needed!

wireless earbuds in case my headphones give out

tips for my apple pencil + silicon covers if i need a different texture/the sound is too loud

a sanitary pad (not for me, as i had a hysterectomy, but i like carrying one around for my menstruating friends)

a pouch with hair ties for when my hair bothers me

autism lanyard (not pictured, as i put it in after i took it)

will i use these every day? not necessarily. but it’s good to have these all in one place in a little pouch so it’s easy to throw into my bag as i use different ones for different occasions. that way i don’t have to think about all these things individually.

it might seem like common sense for some people, but i didn’t think of this until recently. so i wanted to share this in case it could be handy for other people. some more ideas for what to put in your bag under the break. you can make this as big or as small as you like so some ideas may seem a bit big

powerbank + cables (preferably a powerbank that has a LOT of charge)

snacks (do keep an eye on the expiration date)

painkillers/emergency meds (same thing about the expiration date)

sewing kit

deodorant/perfume

mini fan

hand warmers

scissors/nail clippers (for when tags/threads/your nails are bothering you)

tweezers

lucky charm (i have my lucky cat keychain. it just calms me to have)

plushie/stress ball/fidget toy

mints/a mini toothbrush and toothpaste

extra pair of underwear (for if you suddenly need to stay somewhere overnight or if an accident happens)

comb

band-aids + disinfectant

hand cream/soothing cream

soap/soap leaves

similarly, some mini shampoo or mini body wash (again for if you suddenly need to stay the night. there’s probably already some wherever you’re staying but again. this is a just in case bag)

q-tips

chapstick

makeup remover wipes

razors

hand sanitizer/general sanitizer

wet wipes/tissues

foldable bag

ruler/tape measure

this is a lot but keep in mind, these are just ideas. you don’t have to use everything, just pick out which things you think would be handy for you and make your bag accordingly. do feel free to add onto the list if you have any other ideas.

[ipostmysimpingstuffanonymously]

Gojo "Touch Starved" Satoru