#actually that sounds bad its just because i was an incredibly socially awkward and anxious child so they scared me

[venomgender]

i miss doing theatre

[katyasrussianaccent]

you’re so golden (corpse x reader)

Summary: You’re a faceless youtuber that sings cover songs. What happens when a certain faceless streamer slides into your DMs after you cover one of his songs?

Authors note: Part 3 whoop! I havent written fic in 3 years so Im hoping this is okay. Its about 4000 words, super long, sorry. I also dont play Among Us, but hopefully its not too obvious. Lemme know what you think!

You're nervous, though you aren’t quite sure why. The kind of nervousness that spreads to your feet, causing you to tap your toes against the side of your sofa.

Call you in 15. 

You look at the message again, staring at it till the screen goes blurry. Rubbing your eyes you exhale into the emptiness of your apartment; a feeble attempt at calming yourself down.

Logically it’s stupid to be nervous over a phone call. Logically you know that in the grand scheme of the universe, there are bigger things at hand. But you’re not a logical person, never have been. You’re all heart and emotion, both a blessing and a curse. There’s something intimate about a phone call, to have nothing but someone’s voice on the other end of the phone, talking to you and only you. It was a little scary; to think your purely online friendship with Corpse was going to be taken to a different level. You’re excited to think what that could mean.

“Fucking get it together,” you mutter to no-one as you exhale again, because there’s nothing else to do other than to wait and try to breath. There’s this frantic energy about you; like when you eat fizzy sweets, the flavour buzzing on your tongue. Your ancestors used to hunt wolves and here you were nervous over a single phone call.

The silence in your apartment’s too much now; too noisy. You grab your TV remote, clicking onto Spotify to find something. You’re scrolling so much, none of the artists feeling quite right for the moment before settling on Sufjan Stevens.

The dulcet tones fill the space, and for a brief second, you feel fine. You’re feeling relaxed and then your phone lights up.

Incoming Facetime Audio

“Fuckfuckfuckfuck” you say. Your face feels warm, your heart quickens in your chest. You could just ignore it, say you’re not feeling too good and that would be that, you wouldn’t have to do this. But it’s Corpse, you like Corpse and you’re kind of friends.

You swipe to accept the call, and press the button for speaker. 

“Hey,” you say, cringing at the meek tone your voice has taken on.

“Hey,” Corpse’s deep voice rumbles through your tiny speaker, distorting slightly and you press the volume button to turn it down a little.

There’s a beat of silence, a beat too long, and you already hate how awkward this is. You’re not great at social stuff, the concept of being a social butterfly is almost foreign to you. And it’s not because you dislike people, it’s just you hate this; the small talk, the awkwardness before you get comfortable and can hold an actual conversation.

You suddenly remember a tip from your customer service days. “How are you?” you ask, plastering on a grin so wide that it must look borderline demented. Thank god you’re single. 

“I’m okay thanks, how are you?” he asks.

You lounge back against the soft cushions of the sofa, lifting the phone up to your mouth as you do so. “I’m good, excited to be taught by the Among Us master.”

He snorts in disdain. “Hardly a master.” 

You chew your lip before you speak again, “I dunno, people on the internet think you’re pretty good.”

He snorts again, and you smile at the sound. It’s not something you’ve heard from him before, through your hours of watching his streams, you’ve become accustomed to his voice and the noises he makes. But this one seems to be new. And maybe it’s the weird, selfish part of you that likes to think he’s only ever made that sound for you. You shake the thought out of your head, because really? Getting happy over a snort is really such a ridiculous thing to do. 

“People on the internet say a lot of things.”

“True, but sometimes they speak the truth,” you reply, moving to get more comfortable; tucking your feet under your thighs. You wonder what he’s doing right now as he talks to you, is he sitting down? Or is he lying on his bed; his head propped up with pillows? There’s a brief flash of yearning, of wanting to be there in the same room as him, but it disappears as quickly as it appeared so you ignore it.

“Hm. We’ll agree to disagree.”

“Okay, you’re the boss Mr Husband.”

He chuckles softly, and again, you smile. You can feel yourself getting annoyed with yourself; you’re acting like a child with a crush; smiling at the phone. All you needed now was a notebook that had Mrs YN Husband written all over it.

“You know if you keep calling me that, we’re gonna have to get married,” he says, his voice a little lower than it was before. You blink and cock your head to the side, looking at an imaginary camera like you’re in The Office. Did you say that out loud? Is he...flirting with you? Sure, you’re flirty over Twitter, but it’s Twitter, Twitter isn’t real. There’s a fluttery feeling in your stomach at the mere prospect that he might actually be flirting with you.

“I’d be the best wife you could ever get,” you shoot back. There’s a brief second of silence before he answers, and you can hear shuffling on the other end. You want to ask what he’s doing, but you know it would break the conversation, and you’re curious to see where this goes.

“Oh really? And why’s that?” he asks, and you can picture the smirk in his voice. You have no idea what he looks like, no real care about it either, but you bet he’s got a beautiful smile. You bite your tongue before it tells him this, for once your brain actually works and stops you from making a fool out of yourself. It’s incredibly strange, how quickly he puts you at ease without a try, he’s just so naturally comforting. He’s not this flashy persona, he’s just a guy who likes to play video games and happens to be kinda good at them. And also has a voice that is literally like chocolate. Not just chocolate; dark chocolate. If dark chocolate could talk, it would sound like Corpse.

“Cos your girl can cook,” you say proudly, puffing out your chest a little. And that’s not a lie, you can cook. Okay, you’re not a Michelin starred chef, but you feel quite confident in the fact that Gordon Ramsey could eat your food, and probably (hopefully) wouldn’t scream that it was “fucking raw”. 

“And what would you cook for me?” he asks. 

You hum in thought for a second. “You’ll have to marry me first to find that out.”

He laughs, a proper laugh that settles in your stomach, spreading warmth through your chest. “I’ll think about it. I can hear music, what are you listening to?”

You straighten up a little, the question catching you off guard. You bite the inside of your cheek as you look at the song that’s playing. It’s not his type of music, you’re almost positive about that. You almost don’t want to tell him out of embarrassment. You’re not sure why you feel embarrassed; you know Corpse isn’t an asshole, he wouldn’t make fun of you. But music is so personal to you, so personal, it’s like baring a piece of your soul; which sounds so fucking cliche, but it’s true.

“Uhhh...It’s called Make out in My Car by Sufjan Stevens,” you reply.

He hums in affirmation. “It sounds nice; from what I can hear.”

“I can turn it up?” you ask, leaning forward to grab the remote off the coffee table.

“You could always sing some for me,” he offers. 

You laugh a little, scrunching up your nose. “And why would I do that?”

“I thought you wanted to get married. You have to woo me,” he replies.

“Woo you?” you ask, your tone incredulous. This isn’t how you pictured the conversation going.

“Yeah. Woo me, yn.” he says, dragging out the “o” causing you to laugh again.

You sigh dramatically. “I haven’t warmed up or anything, it’s gonna sound so bad” you warn as you put the song to the beginning.

“I’m sure you sound great. Go ahead, woo me.” 

You shake your head as you softly sing. “I'm not trying to go to bed with you, I just wanna make out in my car. And though I'm dying to fall in love with you, I just wanna make out in my car”. You stop and you’re suddenly very aware that you have essentially just serenaded him. Good going, brain.

It’s silent for a beat too long, and the smile that graced your lips starts to fade as the embarrassment starts to set in. 

“Well now we definitely have to get married,” he affirms. And there’s that fluttery feeling again.

You swallow, moving the conversation swiftly onto Among Us. You grab your laptop that was next to you, humming in acknowledgement as he walks you through downloading it. 

“So there’s a few of us joining us tonight, it should be really fun.”

“Oh. It’s not just us two?” you ask. You focus on the download, watching the number increase. You’re nervous at the prospect of playing with other people, strangers, for the first time. 

“No, it’s a 4 player minimum. We’re going to stream as well.”

“Corpse…” you start. You begin to pick at the skin around your nails, a habit you do whenever you get really anxious. This was meant to just be a cute moment where you learnt how to play a game, not a big event where people would be actually watching you, judging your every move.

“We’re going to do a few games off stream with you, you don’t need to be there for the stream after if you don’t want to,” he interrupts. 

“Okay,” you trail off, your teeth biting down on your bottom lip. You feel a little better, but not by much. You didn’t know who the other people were, what if they hated you? You ask this out loud.

“I’ll be there. You know Rae and Sykkuno. Felix, Sean and Toast will be there but they’re super nice, I promise.” His voice is sincere, and it soothes you. You don’t know him, not really know him, but you trust Corpse. You know he has his own struggles, and you believe his promise; he wouldn’t screw you over or put you in a situation you were uncomfortable with.

The rest of the call is him taking you through how to play and how to set up something called Proximity Chat so everyone can talk to each other in the game. He says it’s easier once you actually play, and it doesn’t sound particularly hard quite honestly, you just hope you don’t get imposter on the first try because you’re not the greatest liar. 

The game screen pops up, and you type in the code that Corpse gives you. You say goodbye to Corpse, who tells you to text him if you need any help. You drop into the game lobby, and you look at the little astronaut. There’s no time to dwell as a cacophony of voices hits you.

“YN!” Rae screeches and you chuckle at her enthusiasm. You’ve known Rae for a few years now, you met at college and had become fast friends. Though you had many different interests - gaming for one, you considered her your best friend. Rae was the type of friend where you didn’t need to talk every single day, you could message her a week later and it would be like no time had passed at all. And you loved that, sometimes you just didn’t want to talk to anyone. Sometimes your mood wasn’t the best, and you needed a little time to recharge. And she understood that, something that you were eternally grateful for. 

“Raebies!” you screech back, using your “pet” name for her.

“I’ve been trying to get you to play forever. But Mr Smooth Operator over there slides into your DMs and suddenly you’re a gamer now?”

“It sounds so sordid when you say it like that,” you reply.

“Hi yn! Glad to see you playing with us,” Sykkuno says. You greet him and the others, making sure to say hi to everyone in the game. You didn’t want to start off by being accidentally rude. You listen as everyone talks amongst each other, and you talk when spoken to, but you aren’t interjecting. It wasn’t anything against the other players, it was just a little overwhelming, and you were figuring out what everyone was like.

“Hello,” Corpse’s voice interrupts your train of thought and you greet him along with everyone else. 

“Aw, I wanted purple,” you say, frowning at Corpse’s name above the astronaut.

“We can switch,” he replies.

“No it’s o -” you start to speak before you realise he’s already switched to white. “Thank you, you didn’t have to.” You smile as you switch to purple, and you decide to add a flower for a little pizzazz.

“It’s your first game, I’ll kill you if I get imposter so it’ll even out,” he jokes and everyone laughs. The countdown begins and you puff your cheeks out, exhaling as it gets to 1. You’re nervous again, a seemingly common theme of the night. Your shoulders relax as the word CREWMATE flashes across the screen.

You watch as everyone but Corpse disperses from the cafeteria with haste, and you look at the keyboard to press the buttons to move.

“You ever see an old person text? That’s how I’m picturing you right now,” Corpse says as you walk together to Weapons.

“Shut up Sonny,” you reply in your best old woman voice, getting a laugh. You open up the task, shooting the Asteroids with ease. “Yay, I completed a task!”

“Good job,” Corpse replies, and you beam at the praise. You move down to o2, doing your task while Corpse does his.

“Wait, you could be imposter right? How would I know?” you ask as you walk together to Navigation.

“You wouldn’t, you just have to trust me,” he says, his voice full of charm.

You scowl. “Well that just makes me not want to trust you.” 

Before he replies, there’s a blaring alarm. DEAD BODY REPORTED. You blink at the suddenness; you were really enjoying the relaxing pace of the game. You look at the screen;  Felix has been killed.

“Who found the body?” Corpse asks.

“I did,” Rae answers. “I was in admin, and was going to lower engine and it was there in storage.”

“If you were in admin, why didn’t you go up through Cafeteria?” Toast asks.

“Because it’s quicker to go through storage,” Rae replies. They argue between themselves, and you listen intently and silently. It’s a lot of information, you can’t tell whose lying, but you guess that’s what makes a good player.

“Where were you yn?” Sean quizzes, and it takes you a second to realise you’re being spoken to.

“Oh. I was in um o2?”

“You don’t sound too sure there, pretty sus,” he says. Your face heats up a little, you’re not the imposter, but it feels like you are.

“She was in o2 and then we went to Navigation,” Corpse answers, and you breathe out as he takes on the interrogation.

“Oh you were together?” Rae asks, and you know that tone she’s got. It’s the tone that says she’ll be messaging you right away.

“Well yeah, it’s her first game, I’m not gonna leave her alone,” he says and you smile at that. 

“Yeah we’ve been together the whole time,” you add and it’s left at that. No-one votes anyone out, since no-ones really too suspicious. You carry on the game, and you find yourself really enjoying it, though the questioning part is kind of stressful. You can see why Corpse likes it so much, it’s really fun. You’re in electrical, humming as you do your task when Rae comes next to you. 

“Hey,” you greet her.

“I’m sorry, nothing personal,” she replies. Before you have a chance to say a word, she kills you and you look on in shock as your ghost floats above your body.  You listen into the meeting as Rae continues to lie and plead her case. She’s good, but Corpse knows better.

“Wait, you said you found her in electrical and you were where?” 

“I was in Upper Engine, and then I went to electrical to do my task,” Rae answers, her voice even and calm.

“I was in Lower Engine, and I didn’t see you,” Corpse says, and you grin at the fact Rae’s been found out. That’s what she gets for killing you.

“You were doing your task, I passed right by you,” Rae starts. She pleads her case, but it’s too late and she’s voted out.

“That was so much fun!” you declare. “I can see why you guys play it all the time.”

“Yes! We have converted another!” Felix shouts in victory.

“And all it took was Corpse,” Rae mutters sarcastically.

“Don’t get bitter Rachel, just get better,” you reply, causing the group to laugh.

You get the hang of it after a few games, and find yourself agreeing to stay while the others stream, though you decide against it yourself. You’ve only streamed once by yourself, and it was a very casual affair and you don’t want to feel too much pressure while you enjoy yourself. You know that Corpse gets nervous when he streams and he’s been doing it for so much longer, so you can only imagine how nervous you would be.

You tap your fingernails against the keyboard as the lobby counts down, any previous nerves have been replaced with excitement. 

IMPOSTER flashes across. You’re the only one, your astronaut looks lonely on the screen by itself, and the red letters almost taunt you. 

“Shit,” you mutter as your brain goes into overdrive. What was it Corpse had said before? Not to be too obvious. You don’t kill immediately, instead going at your previous pace to not look too suspicious. You were still fairly new to the game, and you were going to use that to your advantage.

You fake your task in Cafeteria before venting over to Navigation where Toast was.

“Hi Toast!” you greet, coming to stand next to him as you pretend you’re doing the task. 

“Oh hey yn,” he says. It doesn’t seem like he suspects you, and you’re not quite sure when to click the Kill button. You do it anyway before running out and going down and into shields. There’s adrenaline running through you as the dead body’s reported and you crack your knuckles before putting on your game face. You were going to play dumb, play the confused newbie - because to them, that’s what you were. 

“YN, where were you?” Corpse asks. Fuck. Maybe you weren’t going to get away with this.

You twiddle your hair as you draw out your words, playing the role perfectly. “Uhm I was in...shields? I think that’s what it’s called. I was in the cafeteria before that though.”

“Wait, you couldn’t have, I was in weapons. I would have seen you,” Sykkuno says.

You open your mouth to talk. “She could have vented,” Felix comments, and the rest of the group starts to agree.

“Guys, I don’t even know what venting is. I literally just started playing,” you point out, giggling.

“That’s true,” Rae agrees and you knew there was a reason you loved her.

“Bullshit! She’s playing you with her “oh I don’t know how to play” schtick,” Felix proclaims.

“Aw, that’s kind of rude, Felix. I’m just enjoying the game, doing the tasks,” you say, pouting a little. He’s the next on your list. 

Everyone skips the vote and you lean over your laptop, ready for the next round. You were going to win this. You kill Rae and Toast next, and yet again, manage to worm your way out of any suspicion. You can sense that Corpse and Felix are starting to get suspicious of you, and you know you need to bring out the big guns to throw them off.

You catch Sykkuno in Med Bay after checking the cams in Security.

“Hi yn!” he greets, and you almost feel guilty as you kill him. He’s so sweet and innocent, but unfortunately, casualties are a given. You pass Felix as he comes out of reactor and it’s only a matter of time before you’ll have to talk your way out of this one again.

“I passed yn as I came out of reactor,” Felix shouts with a hint of glee.

You roll your eyes; this is going to be tough. “Yeah I came from Upper Engine, I was finishing part 2 of a task.”

“I was in Electrical, where was the body?” Corpse asks.

“Med Bay. And the only one that could’ve been there was yn,” Felix starts.

“Well no, you could have passed me and killed Sykkuno then self reported,” you reply. “I think you can do that right?” 

Corpse hums in agreement. “Oh come on! She’s being really sus,” Felix argues.

“You are being a little sus yn,” Corpse comments.

“Corpse. You don’t really think it’s me do you?” You decide to lower your voice a little, your tone sweet but sultry. “You only taught me like an hour ago, there’s no way I’d be able to fool everybody so quickly.” You get close to the mic so it’s like you’re speaking only to Corpse. “Remember what I said? You’re a master at this.” You’re laying it on thick, and for a brief second you think you’ve been too over the top.

“This is difficult,” Corpse says, and you see the seconds count down, your heartbeat starts to quicken.

“Corpse, stop being a fucking simp and vote her out!” Felix demands.

“Corpsie baby,” you drawl out and you smile in success as you hear him sigh, almost shakily. You’ve got this in the bag. The victory screen flashes up and you cheer.

“Fuck yeah!” you shout, patting yourself on the back. You laugh as you exhale the breath you didn’t know you were holding.

“Good game yn!” Sykkuno comments, the others agreeing.

“Not fair, you used your womanly wiles against Corpse,” Felix says.

“Gotta use them for something. Not my fault Corpse knows where his allegiance lies,” you reply laughing a little.

You stretch, your back crying out in pain from being hunched over so long. You let out a long, loud moan of relief as you straighten your spine, your shoulders relaxing as you move from side to side.

“Your mic’s not muted” Corpse points out, clearing his throat. You feel your stomach drop and your face instantly becomes hot. Shit. 

“Oh. Uh. I totally forgot about that,” you say, forcing out a chuckle. You screw your eyes shut, any happiness has been now replaced by red hot shame. “So this was fun, uh, really fun, but um, I’m gonna, I’m gonna go. So...yeah. Bye guys, have fun!” 

You click to exit without giving anyone a chance to say a word, and drop your head into your hands. 

“Can’t wait to see what they say on Twitter about this,” you mutter into your hands.

TAGLIST (if youre bold, it wont let me tag): @teenageguitarist @fanworrior  @cherry-piee @mirahg  @clara-bee @cookinglovingalien @vir-tual @clubfairy @youretheonlyonewhomakesme @more-like-reyna @boiled-onionrings @moneybagmgk @brendalopez99 @delicateavenuenacho @dreamsofficialwife @hydrate-tion @little-red02 

[dungeonsndiapers]

Update

Posting about Kennedy starting school made me realize I missed posting here.

So update...

Kennedy, she's an awesome kid. She's funny and so damn smart. Her vocabulary is insane and often she says things and I have to makes sure that's what she actually said because it doesnt seem like it would come out of a 4 year old. She so inquisitive. I know its common at her age to never shut the fuck up, but she doesn't just ask questions for the sake of speaking. She wants to know so much about the world around her. Like I said in my previous post she started pre school. Its a 3 day a week program and she doesnt go all day, its mainly for social interaction. I knew when I became a parent that would be a difficult aspect for me to navigate, being someone who has such bad social anxiety that I find it difficult to leave the house... but I didn't know how much self judgement and hatred would be uncovered by this. So I am glad to see her go off and make friend and socialize with kids her age, because she wants to so desperately, and its been severely lacking and I sort of hate myself more and more each day over my inability to just go out and interact with people. (Like seriously what is wrong with me that I feel anxious and awkward around children).

Jefferson, is also an awesome kid. He's also... a lot. He started walking at 8 months and shortly after that learned how much he liked to jump and climb, and he never, ever stops. He keeps me on my toes for sure. He is also 2 months away from being two years old and is completely non verbal. Not one word. He babbles, he says "ma ma" but its never at me. He's never assigned a sound to a word. He scored in the "medium risk" category at his 15 month assessment for autism and will be reevaluated in January for his two year appointment. In the mean time we have an appointment with audiology to test his hearing and then after that speech therapy evaluation. He also has... idk sensory issues. He's always had a sensitive gag reflex, and now that results in him throwing up (not spitting up, straight up vomit) at least once a week. If he cries too hard he'll start gagging and throw up. If he put too much food in his mouth, gagging and throwing up. If we give him food he isn't familiar with and decides he doesnt trust it, gag and throw up (Sometimes without even tasting it). Its... exhausting. We've been told that some kids are like that and he is physically very health and getting all the nutrition he needs so we shouldn't worry. But the cleaning vomit up gets tiresome. However.... he may not very giving will his smiles, but when he trusts you enough to let you in he's the most affectionate and happy kid. His smile and laugh are everything. He's also really smart. He understands how things works, he just doesn't know how to tell us. if he's thirsty he will put his cup on the fridge where the water dispenser is. When he doesn't want to watch something on TV, he'll grab the remote and put it in our hands. Things will get better. At least he's mostly sleeping through the night.

Bill is doing good. Idk he's just Bill. I wish he has more of a social life here. He doesn't seemed super bothered by it though. Maybe because he interacts with people at work. I just want him to be happy.

As for me, I don't think I'm doing great. I feel incredibly lonely. Being a parent is so isolating, especially in a pandemic. And on top of that I am completely incapable of making friends. I have been in Washington for almost 4 years and I haven't made one friend. Literally not one. And the thought of having to talk to people makes my chest feel tight so... cool guess I'll just be lonely. I have started talking to a therapist, but its hard because I hate telehealth but there isn't really another option for us. (I know its seems weird that someone with anxiety like me would love to not have to talk face to face but I also have a lot of anxiety about not being able to hear them or them not being able to hear me or having problems with my internet and the picture wont load. Guys idk what to say I'm fucking insane) Even if they did have in person sessions, when tf am I supposed to go? I have two kids, one who is difficult and no one to really watch them on a consistent basis for something like therapy. So telehealth is the only option while Bill works from home and tries to watch the kids. But it's really difficult to focus when I can hear Jefferson crying upstairs or when I'm all done and I feel emotionally rung out because I have been crying for 45 minutes non stop, I have to be immediately back into mom mode because Bill has to get back to work. It's a mess. I'm a mess. I'm constantly overstimulated. And I'm so tired.

[thefinalcinderella]

Kaze ga Tsuyoku Fuiteiru Chapter 1 - The Residents of Chikusei-sou (Part 4)

It’s out

Full list of translations here

Translation Notes

1. Shindou is the reading for 神童 (prodigy) as well as 震動 (tremor, vibration)

2. 鯖 is the character for mackerel, with the fish radical on the left

3. Jizo or Kshitigarbha is a bodhisattva who is the guardian of children

4. Backchanelling means “ a sound or gesture made to give continuity to a conversation by a person who is listening to another.” The Japanese word is aizuchi which I couldn’t find a good way to explain in the text

5. Banchou Sarayashiki is a ghost story with several versions, all of which involve a servant, 10 dishes, and broken trust. I think the version referred to in this chapter is the folk version where a beautiful servant is blamed and killed for breaking one of ten dishes, and came back as a ghost counting the dishes

6. King says 住人が十人 (juunin ga juunin)

Previous | Next

Musa Kamara parted with Kiyose at Chikusei-sou's entryway and climbed the stairs to the second floor to return to his room.

When he had just arrived here last spring, he had been terribly anxious about living in a wooden house, and he had been nervous walking in the hallway. In his hometown, the house where his family lived was a colonial Western style house made of stone. He couldn't imagine things like thin walls that allowed you to hear people talking from next door or narrow hallways that made even passing by someone difficult.

But now, Musa loved the building Chikusei-sou itself, and its residents who were in the same generation as him.

Musa thought about Kakeru, who he was introduced to in the bathroom of the main house. He hoped he would able to get along well with Kakeru. Musa recalled his quick and nimble movements, like he did some kind of sport, and how he looked at Musa with a slightly bewildered look, and his determined eyes. No doubt, Musa thought, no doubt Kakeru will also fit in here quickly.

The door to Room 202, which was in the middle of the three rooms on the left side of the hallway and just before Musa's room, was slightly open. He passed by and peeked inside. The resident of this room was Sakaguchi Youhei, a fourth-year sociology student, and the one who lived in Room 205, which faced Musa's room, was Sugiyama Takashi, a third-year business student. They were watching TV together.

"Good evening."

Musa greeted them because he felt like talking to someone. The two in the room turned around. "Oh, come in," they carefreely urged.

He was served with a can of beer with water droplets on it, and he sat in seiza on the tatami.

"King-san, are you watching quiz shows again?"

Looking at the celebrities pushing buzzer buttons in the cathode-ray tube, Musa was a little bit shocked. Sakaguchi of Room 202 had a pastime of watching all the quiz shows, even recording them. At Chikusei-sou, he was called King with some teasing. It had the meaning of "Quiz King."

"'Course I am."

As he said that, King violently hit the tissue box placed close at hand. And then, "The Baths of Caracalla!"

He shouted the answer to the question at the TV in a loud voice. The tissue box was his substitute for a buzzer.

"I never get bored when I watch a quiz show with King-san."

Sugiyama laughed, encouraging Musa to drink bear with his hand. "He makes incredible reactions."

Sugiyama's nickname was "Shindou." At first, Musa felt suspicious as to why this person with such a quiet way of speaking was called "Tremor." (1) Shindou had immediately told him, "You're mistaken."

"I was born in a village deep in the mountains. It takes two days for me to make my homecoming. Oh, do you know 'homecoming'?"

"Yes, I do. But does it really take you two days? Even when I go back to my home country, it takes about a day to fly from Japan to there."

"Oof, so I come from a place that's farther than your hometown timewise? I'm seeing how deep in the hinterlands my village is once again. Oh, you know what 'hinterlands' mean?"

"I do not know that. Does it mean rural?"

"Yes, exactly. In that village, I'm called 'Shindou.' Well, just a local one, anyways. Oh, 'shindou' has the meaning of 'child of the gods'…"

The residents of Chikusei-sou mostly spoke to Musa in rapid slang without any consideration for him. In the first place, Musa had an intermediate or higher level of Japanese proficiency, but he was at a loss with slang. Only Shindou carefully explained the slang he didn't know and the difficult words for him. Thanks to him, Musa had come to be able to speak Japanese more and more comfortably. Even so, since he was following the example of the well-mannered and gentlemanly Shindou, he tried to avoid using the slang he learned as much as possible. Nico-chan, who lived on the first floor, sometimes laughed that "I can't feel on edge with Musa's language."

While drinking beer, Musa watched the quiz show for a while.

Only King, the twins, and Nico-chan had TVs in Chikusei-sou. Because the smoke pollution in Nico-chan's room is awful, they rarely approached there. King watched quiz shows endlessly. That was why when there was a show they wanted to watch, they generally went to the twins' room.

Even now, they could hear the sounds of the TV from the twins' room, but no sounds of talking. Apparently, they were spend in the night quietly with just the twins without being disturbed by the noisy senpais.

Without getting bored, King continued to hit the tissue box and answer questions from outside the cathode-ray tube. And then as soon as it turned to commercial, he fast forwarded through it with the remote control on hand. Is this a video? Musa noticed for the first time.

The commercials quickly flew past, and then the show came back on again. This time, it wasn't a corner with a quick buzzer format. King finally averted his consciousness a little bit away from the TV.

"Hey, Musa. Shindou is keeping quiet and watching the quiz show. It's unbelievable."

Unsure of what he was saying, Musa tilted his head. King turned all the way around to face Musa and Shindou, who were sitting next to each other.

"When you're watching a quiz show, wanting to answer the questions is human nature. It's like, 'Writing 青 with the left fish radical becomes…?' 'Mackerel!' (2) And yet he's keeping quiet. There's no competition here."

"King-san, you shout out the answers even when you're watching by yourself."

Musa said, as he thought about hearing King shouting out contextless words night after night from the room next door.

"Of course I do. That's what quiz shows are for. I really don't get guys who just watch stiffly like Jizo." (3)

Is that so, Musa thought.

"Is that so?"

Shindou said aloud, objecting. "I think it is you who's in the minority, King-san. I have no idea how you can get so fired up when you aren't even a contestant."

"Why don't you try apply for the program as a contestant?" Musa interjected.

King visited quiz websites on the Internet and enthusiastically tackled quiz questions everyday. He was so devoted to quizzes that he even stepped into the smoke hell that everyone was afraid of to borrow Nico-chan's computer. Surrounding him from a distance, the residents of Chikusei-sou watched over his passion for taking quizzes.

"Answering questions faster, more accurately, and more than the famous quiz kings from outside the screen is the way of enjoyment for true connoisseurs."

King puffed up with pride. King seemed bold and shameless, but he actually had social anxiety, so he couldn't appear on television or anything like that. Musa, who became aware of that, didn't say anything more. Shindou also gently backchanneled with "Is that so." (4)

King seemed a bit awkward, so Musa decided to provide a new topic.

"Do you two already know that a new person has come to Aotake?"

"When did they get here?!"

"What kind of person are they?"

The two instantly bent their bodies forward. King even lowered the TV volume. It seemed that it was quite an interesting topic for him and Shindou. Musa was pushed by the momentum and told them about meeting Kakeru in the bath.

"I believe he just arrived tonight. Haiji-san says he's enrolled in the sociology program. Haiji-san seemed happy."

"I have a bad feeling about this," King muttered.

"Why is that? Kakeru seems like a serious and good person."

"The character of the newcomer is not what King-san is worried about," Shindou explained. "You know about it too, right, Musa? About how Haiji-san is eager to have Room 103 filled."

"Yes, but what about that?"

"That's the point." King put an elbow on his crossed legs and affectedly stroked his chin with his palm. "Musa, you must also have kept hearing it since spring. Haiji muttering 'Just one more, just one more…' like 'Banchou Sarayashiki.'" (5)

"What is a Ban-chou Sara-ya-shiki?"

"That's a—"

Cutting off Shindou before he could tell him, King came to a conclusion.

"There's definitely something going on. Haiji is plotting something."

"Why is it so important to him that ten people live in Aotake?"

Shindou tilted his head, thinking. King solemnly began his deduction.

"This is my fourth year living here, but ten tenants…that just now wasn't a pun." (6)

"I understand. Continue."

"There has never been ten people living here. That's because there are only nine rooms here."

"That's right."

"However, this year is different. It was decided that the twins will have Room 201. And then, Haiji started chanting like a phantom. 'Just one more.'"

"It's true that Haiji-san seemed fixated on ten people."

Musa also nodded. Kiyose would probably be dispassionate and not show much emotion no matter what turmoil occurred in Chikusei-sou. However, this year, it could be seen almost too easily that he was worrying over whether or not there would be a tenant in the vacant Room 103. Musa had also wondered what was that about, and thought it was strange.

"What exactly is going to happen when there are ten people?"

"No idea."

Despite the conversation he started, he threw his suspicions away quite easily. "Maybe a ghost counting plates will show up."

"You were the one who kept going on about how 'there must be something, there must be something,' so how about thinking about it a bit more?"

Shindou complained at King, who had pulled out of the conversation and was once again absorbed in the TV. However, King was already preoccupied with the quizzes and only returning vague responses. Musa and Shindou discussed Kiyose's intentions for a while, but unable to come to a definite conclusion before very long and ended it.

Room 202 fell into silence for a short while.

Even the TV was waiting for the answer of the quiz contestant with an exaggerated pause. King murmured, "At any rate, if it's the case that something bad happens to us, Haiji will let us know. He's naggy and makes snide comments when you skip cleaning the toilets, but well, other than that, he's a good guy."

That's exactly right, Musa thought. It was impossible that Kiyose would do anything that trap the residents of Chikusei-sou into a difficult situation.

Musa did not have a "bad premonition." That was because the Kiyose he met just earlier seemed quite happy. About as happy as when Musa saw snow piling up for the first time in his life last year.

Previous | Next

[justdyingslowly]

1. Name justdyingslowly obviously come on

2. Nationality Australian

3. Age 22

4. Birthday nnnah dont feel like it

5. Zodiac sign (or your primal zodiac sign) Libra/Scorpio cusp

6. Gender wamon

7. Sexuality very very hetero

8. Your looks (add a picture or describe yourself) androgenous

9. What do you/did you study? Psychology (focus on sexology) and art.

10. What’s your current job like?/What job would you like to have? I am disabled you think I can work ha sexologist would be awesome. When I was a kid I wanted to be a fireman but Australias always burning

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11. Your birth order head first

12. How many siblings do you have? 1

13. Do you have good relations with your family? yeah dads finally out of his abusive relationship, nearing age 70 and his emotions and his sexuality are finally opening up for the first time and that makes me SO happy.

14. How many friends do you have? what kind of fucked up question is this.

15. Your relationship status relationshipped. Fiance? got the marriage papers in a drawer somewhere with the car rego but can’t be fucked filling them?

16. What do you look for in a SO? empathetic, mature, calm. Always open to discussion. Prefers to be blunt rather than secretive. Emotional age over 14 (incredibly fucking rare apparently). Puts an importance on context and understanding other views above all else.

17. Do you have a crush? Hellll yeah Crush on my partner and got a crush on a mutual friend of ours who don’t even know hes cute af hehe one day partners gonna accidentally spill the beans and embarrass me coz hes shit with secrets RIP me.

18. When did you have your first kiss? You think I can remember this bullshit? Its not that big a deal

19. Do you prefer serious and meaningful relationships or casual dating/one night stands? One night stand sex almost exclusively sucks. Just. SUCKS. Because neither of you know what the other likes and it ends up being an awkward mix of trying to please yourself while trying to also be considerate.

20. What are your deal breakers? Plugging your ears to anything that feels gross, uncomfortable or disagrees with you. How can you grow as a person without introspection? How can you mold what you think and believe without taking in other arguments and comparing them to your beliefs to see how they stack up? Its pathetic.

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21. How was your day? cute mutual friend had a fall this morning and were both worried about him. His back is bad and he’s getting a little older, he can’t be getting dizzy and having falls like that. other than that im anxious about seeing my gastro. He’s lovely but... specialists are specialists. Good at knowing what they know but not always great at listening.

22. Favourite food & drink you think im allowed to eat or drink? water and... foods a touchy subject.

23. What position do you sleep in? Usually on my side with a body pillow to grip so I don’t end up choking my partner in his sleep.

24. What was your last dream about? uuhhh...going to italy and being unable to get into this tiny basket boat properly.

25. Your fears does PTSD to medical shit count haha

26. Your dreams ... going to italy and being unable to get into a tiny basket boat thingy?

27. Your goals - get some sort of diagnosis eventually. Its been 3 years of trying and im tired. - get back to studying art part time for my bachelors. - pass JLPT N3. - go back to university for psychology. - do the dishes when I get home.

28. Any pets? two budgies. we also take care of any orphaned or injured birds.

29. What are your hobbies? feeling nauseous drawing writing a little bit im making a little gameboy game in C atm too

30. Any cool places in your area? i live next to a national park with waterfalls and koalas and emus and stuff

31. What was your last awkward situation? mutual friend made a comment on his chest i playfully smacked it (related to the comment) it was surprisingly hard “O-oh wow, thats... I didnt expect that” my partner laughed at me. it was awful.

32. What is your last regret? getting embarrassed at friends pecs stop making me think about it 33. Language/s you can speak english. N4 Japanese.

34. Do you believe in astrological stuff? (Zodiac, tarot, etc.) of course not what the fuck

35. Have any quirks? Quirkless. I do wiggle when im happy though apparently.

36. Your pet peeves open doors.

37. Ideal vacation spend a months chilling in an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

38. Any scars? internal? yes

39. What does your last text message say? peepee poopoo ustinky

40. Last 5 things from your search history how do i find this

41. What’s your [device] background? Sam Porter Bridges walkin around Sam Porter Bridges cuddling BB-28 Louise while he sleeps my chicken

42. What do you daydream about? all might

43. Describe your dream home an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

44. What’s your religion/Your thought about religion its a comforting thought having a parent-figure who cares about you and looks after all the big things you can’t manage yourself, but institutionalizing it runs a severe risk of becoming harmful cults. And it often does.

45. Your personality type me

46. The most dangerous thing you’ve done i saw the lost bunny that was on all the posters in the neighbourhood looked thin and patchy so i grabbed him to take him home. im allergic. sent me to hospital and I almost died.

47. Are you happy with your current life? feeling sick sucks and partners having a depressive episode but things are pretty good

48. Some things you’ve tried in your life living

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49. What does your wardrobe consist of? blacks, reds, whites and pinks

50. Favourite colour to wear? at the moment pink. Red is always comforting though.

51. How would you describe your style? mix between lazy alternative punk, teenager with band shirts and harajuku peach kawaii uwu

52. Are you happy with your current looks? kinda wish i was a bit shorter but what can you do

53. If you could change/add something to your appearance - impossible or not - what would it be? bit shorter

54. Any tattoos or piercings? lol no PTSD

55. Do you get complimented often? by who? partner constantly, family haha are you kidding im australian so a friend’s version of showing affection is calling you a cunt and slapping your ass in public

56. Favourite aesthetic? all might

57. A popular trend that you dislike blocking because you disagree or find them distasteful. Ignoring all context to opposing thoughts and arguments. taking a personal feeling of disgust to mean something is evil. Blocking your ears to anything that isn’t a circlejerk of what you already think - and trying to isolate anyone who even just listens to something other then the noise of your sloppy dicks to have a thought of their own.

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58. Songs you’re currently obsessed with? The Machine by Low Roar

59. Song you normally wouldn’t admit you like. why wouldnt i admit i like a song

60. Favourite genre? probably enka haha

61. Favourite artist/band/genre? probably enka haha oh and tatsuro yamashita

62. Hated popular songs/artists? why the hell would I hate something like a song? I hate aspects of the music industry as a whole I guess?

63. Put your music on shuffle and list first 5 which playlist they aren’t all together in one place

64. Can you sing or play any instruments? piano, saxophone... uh... partners good at making music and playing shakuhachi

65. Do you like karaoke? no.

66. Own any albums? yes? many?

67. Do you listen to radio? What stations? no. but triple J, ABC Jazz and Classical. sometimes they even play final fantasy and JRPG music on classical which is pretty neat. -

68. Favourite movie/series? can i make this about games because then the answer is Metal Gear Solid

69. Favourite genre of movies/books/etc ...shounen?

70. Your fictional crush/es if they’re over 40yrs old, male and happy and bubbily or grumpy and sad then there’s a big ol fat chance I wanna bone. Solid Snake from MGS4, All Might and pretty much anyone drawn by Tarou Madoromi.

71. Which fictional character is you? uh

72. Are you a shipper? List your otps, if so what does this even mean what language is this

73. Favourite greek god? idk hades seems chill

74. A legend from where you live that you like the story of Tjilbruke is funny and good. all Kaurna stories are good.

75. Do you like art? What’s your favourite work or artist? im in a big egon schiele mood atm.

76. Can you share your other social media? no i am incapable

77. Favourite youtubers? many

78. Favourite platform? not too high up. actually i like being a little lower than ground level in corners.

79. How much time do you spend on the internet? too much

80. What video games have you played? Which one’s your favourite? look i just want to say that MGS4 is the best one in the series and Death Stranding is phenomenally engaging.

81. Your favourite books (manga also counts) these are all so goddamn definitive how can I pick? Oh wait the answer is One Piece

82. Do you play board/card games? I play DnD atm and know 15 yr old rules to Yugioh

83. Have you ever been to a night marathon in cinema? that shit dosn’t happen here

84. Favourite holiday golden week coz its a week also easter because thats when all the glucose based sweets come back

85. Are you into dramas? what kind

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86. Would you use death note, if you had one? no. thats called being a murderer.

87. What changes would you make in the world, no matter how impossible, if you had the power to? chill people out a bit. when people feel unsafe they get really depenfive and territorial and block their ears to everything, making in-and-out groups for themsevles that end up putting them in more harm.

88. Could you survive a zombie apocalypse? im disabled with a disabled partner. we arent funny sure we can survive normal everyday life when society is angled so sharply against us.

89. If you had to be turned into a paranormal being, what would it be? id like to be a mimi spirit

90. What would you want to happen to you after your death? spooky time

91. If you had to change your name, what would be your pick? toshinori yagi

92. Who would you switch your life with for a week? anyone healthy

93. Pick an emoji to be your tattoo that cursed one with the intense eyes and the hand

94. Write 3 things about yourself - only one of them must be true im me im not me im pee

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95. Cold or hot? cold.

96. Be a hero or be a villain? both are distasteful ideas in reality

97. Sing everything you want to say or rhyme? i can’t do either partner speak sin bad puns and its hell, these both sound about equal

98. Shapeshifting or controlling time? shapeshifting. controlling time is eithe rmanipulative or lonely. shapeshifing is every other superpower at once.

99. Be immortal or be immune to everything aside from natural death? both are deeply upsetting ideas

100. ….. or …..? jiji or ossan? generally Jiji, but ossans can be lovely too.

[nad-zeta]

Match up! (◠‿◠✿)

hiya!! can i pls get a matchup for ikesen, if its ok? 💞

bi girl i prefer guys! ambiverted intp, gryffindor, n true neutral. i have an older twin sis n i love/hate her sm lmao!!

i have medium-length straight-ish black hair (w/ a side bang to the right) & dark brown eyes!! im 5'5-ish, fun fact: im a filipina!

sooo im a complex daydreamer!! i NEED attention/affirmation or ill feel unwanted/sad. emotional scorpio, im quite sensitive. anxiety, i overthink too much! quiet w/ people im not close w/. easily annoyed but guilty after ‘cause im soft-hearted. im like half funny/playful/kind & half deep/mature/awkward- hopeless romantic! i have a way w/ words, sorta poetic? i wanna be the best! sorta socially anxious, i have a fear of judgement. im not innocent but ppl think i am at first. i look fine but deep down im a big mess. rlly smart & knowledgable. vv passionate, big nerd actually! im like a kid w/ my twin but w/ others im more mature. im the type to do fun stuff and loosen up but would also just cuddle and have long convos. im vv good w/ technology! very imaginative, i come up with stories a lot- around others im very quiet because i literally have no idea what to say. actually a big history fanatic, hehe. i act confident but im not rlly, actually vv insecure and i regret a lot of things.

a habit of mine is that i tend to drift away and just… think? i also tend to care a lot abt my appearance! i get competative but there are also times when im just chill. i get vv embarrassed when i lose control tho n i regret it sm :(( i have loads of trouble asking for help even if i like to help others a lot! i like being organised but i tend to be… chaotic.

hsjsh- fun fact: there are times where im just,, super hyper n say the weirdest things? im good in school but,, im lazy yknow- i love math (surprisingly, i got a natural talent?), science (esp abt stars n space), history, and english (actually my 2nd languange but im very fluent) the most. bilingual but im also learnin french! wanna learn latin too tho but id break down- i have the fear of the unknown, failure, n loneliness! im scared of the future cause its beyond human ability to know,, the only guys ive rlly talked to r family members so my awkwardness goes 100x hsjsjs

oh, i rlly love affection, but i need a lot of space too, tho! girls gotta have privacy- games r a hUge part of my life, so is technology and the modern era! i actually like sports too- not very good at em tho :((

some likes: gaming, jokes (esp corny/stupid/puns), space, stars, weapons (esp swords/guns), philosophy, psychology, testing myself, affection, animals, doing exhilirating things, music, movies, books, writing, astrology, astronomy, learning new things, & mythology.

some dislikes: too much heat, school presentations, creepy dolls, being under pressure, dirty things, blind faith, & annoying people.

tysm! omg i hope this isnt too long- i think this is too long?? yIkes i hope that this is ok!! love ur writing btw! stay safe 💞

Hi hi love! thank you so much for the request! You sound like a wonderful person and omw it soooo cool that you have a twin! I actually think she sent in a request right after you did lol! Anyways sorry for making you wait sooooo long and i hope you enjoy it! @x-joie-x

 So i match you with...................... Mitsuhide

The first time you meet this sneki boy, you were quiet and reserved. War council had just ended and you were named as a princess of the Oda forces. You were super socially awkward, and anxiety was slowly starting to creep in, as the curious warlords started to surround you. It wasn’t until Mitsuhide had pulled you away in a teasing manner to save you from the crowd that you finally started to calm down. He had noticed this new little mouse had been on edge since arriving. However, he didn’t suspect you of being an assassin or spy as, during the whole council, your hands shook, and you could barely speak up against Nobunaga’s demanding and commanding tones. 

Mitsuhide had found you incredibly amusing from the first moment you walked in, you caught this foxes eye. He didn’t know if it was the innocence or naïve purity that just seemed to radiate from you, but for some reason when he was looking at you, he found that he simply couldn’t look away.

It took all of one day for all the warlords to officially drop all suspicions of you. You were just such a sweetheart how could they not instantly love you and feel the need to protect you. You had started helping a few of the maids that first morning after you were named princess. You didn’t want to be a freeloader, so you worked hard to earn your keep and soon, the maids were fighting over who would get to work with you cause all of then just loved and adored you so much. 

You got annoyed with Hideyoshi when he first found you helping the maids, as he was 100% started micromanaging you. You lost you cool and raised your voice at him, TBH Hideyoshi didn’t think anything of it, but it wasn’t until you had pitched up at his manor an hour later to apologize for being so rude to him that he realized what a sweet and sensitive person you truly were. Of course from that moment onward you had gained yourself a big doting brother.

All the Oda forces agreed that you were too sweet and naïve for your own good, so Mitsuhude was assigned to give you princess lesson to prepare you for your new life as Oda princess. You were super excited when Mitsuhide had told you that he was going to teach you a variety topics such as economics, politics, history and self-defence. You even managed to impress the sneki boy, by getting all the questions correct on the first test he had handed you. You had found that first test incredibly easy as you were a bit of a history buff, and all the questions had been based on Nobunaga’s history. This low key shook the sliver kitsune a little bit, as this proved that not only were you pure and naive but you were also super smart. You kind of reminded him a little bit of Mitsunari, a cleaver professor with their head in the clouds. 

Mitushide praised you for your ability to pick up on concepts quickly and work diligently as a student, “I dare say little one, you are the best student a teacher could ask for.” You spend masses amount of time with sneki boi, and through that time you realized just how sweet Mitsuhide truly was, although he was a massive tease leaving you a blushy mess almost every day after lessons with his teasing comments. And naturally, the more time Mitsuhide had spent with you, the more in love he fell. It was also noted by the fellow warlords that, Mitsuhide always wore a soft gentle expression when it came to you, and in your experience he had been a kind gentle patient teacher. SO naturally you found yourself more and more drawn to this mysterious man.

Through all the time spent with the kitsune, you found yourself opening up more and more. He was one of the few people that got to see your playful side. You now would make the puniest, corniest jokes he has ever heard, leaving this kitsune in a fit of laughter mid-way through a lecture. Not only that, but he loved loved loved your competitiveness side. 

This side of you slowly started to surface after the 3rd or 4th self-defence lesson when you started challenging the kitsune to rematches whenever he would pin you down, ultimately beating you in your little makeshift sword fight. Boy oh boy, don’t even get me started on the shooting lessons, once you were able to fire the rifle, you were straight-up challenging this boy, the best marksmen around to a shoot-off. “Come on Mitsuhide, the first one to get 100 bulls-eyes in a row wins, and the loser has to buy tea.” Needless to say, you always lost and even though every day you would make that exact bet, Mitsuhide would always insist on sticking you for tea and lunch as reward for being such a good student. 

He really enjoyed spending time with you and would absolutely insist on holding your hands whenever the two of you were on your way to the tea house together after your lessons. “I can’t have my clumsy little mouse tripping and falling now can I.” Every day without fail, he would say that to you as he wraps his big hand around your small one, while leading you to your favourite tea house.

The two of you would talk about everything and anything over tea, these topics ranged from you making stupid jokes, to talking about random topics such as philosophy and psychology. Either way, Mitsuhide loved to spend time with you. He would always listen to and hang on to every word you said, storing every word in his memory. 

You were his precious little mouse, and he knew you were an extremely sensitive creature. If anyone dared say a single bad word to you or make you sad, they would face the wrath of this very protective kitsune. Like one time, one of the visiting daimyos had talked down to you for accidentally bumped into him. You were busy cleaning the windows when you accidentally lost your balance and bumped into him. He was so disgusted that a mere maid had touched him. He started yelling at you and insulting you, this escalated to such a point that he even had his hand raised ready to hit you for getting dirty window water on his shoes. That’s when sneki boi decided to intervene. Mitsuhide legit stood protectively in front of you with his rifle pointed at the man’s heart, with the full intention to shoot. “Golly me it appears like you are quite the troublesome little mouse, my dear.” He then turned his sharp gaze towards the daimyo “I do suggest you apologize to the Oda princess, lest you want to answer for your crimes directly to Nobunaga.” The man simply scoffed and walked away. Mitsuhide then turned to you and enveloped you in a warm hug while kissing the top of your head, “Are you alright, my dear little mouse?” Mitsuhide looked into your beautiful eyes and gently took your hands in his, “Come little one, I have something I wish to show you.”

The two of you walked hand in hand to Mitsuhide’s manor, Mitsuhide led you out into his garden, where you saw something so beautiful you could cry. The garden was filled with flowers and candles and in the centre was a table set up, with a feast laid out op top of it. 

Mitsihide had told you that night that he was hopelessly in love with you. He was overjoyed when he had discovered that you like him, was also a hopeless romantic and that you had an incredibly poetic, romantic way with words. You handed him a letter in which you had expressed your feelings for him in the form of a beautifully written poem. You were actually intending to leave the poem on his desk as a way of confessing your feelings. This instantly melted sneki bois heart into a giant puddle and he couldn’t help but pull you in for a sweet kiss. 

After diner Mitsuhide had led you deeper into the garden where a fluffy blankie was sprawled out on the grass, he guided you to sit down and the motioned for you to lookup. Above you, a thousand stares were shooting across the sky in a big meteor shower. Mitsuhide pulled you into his arms and kissed your cheeks as the two of you watched the sky. He always remembered every detail you had told him about yourself, so when you revealed that you loved the sky and the stars, he knew he had to incorporate this rare meteor shower in your date somehow. 

This had sparked a new tradition between the two of you, to stargaze and spend the whole night in deep conversation. These nights were full of love and affection as Mitsuhide would pull you into his lap and just hold you there for hours and hours as the two of you talked and watched the sky

Of course sneki boi also had a bit of a spontaneous side, and would take you on exhilarating trips around Nobunaga’s territories. They were mostly missions but after you had nagged Nobunaga to give you permission to go along on the missions, you and Mitsuhide would finish the official work asap so that the two of you cuties had plenty of time to enjoy yourself in the new environment.

Mitsuhide loves everything about you from your slight messiness, to your love of learning new things. He also knows that his sweet little mouse sometimes needs some space and alone time and will be sure to give you as much alone time as you need to recharge. He knows that you will seek him out when you have had enough of your own company. He will always welcome you back with outstretched arms when you have had enough alone time, and shower you with endless amounts of affection.

Whenever you are feeling insecure or worrying about the future Mitsuhide is right there by your side, whispering words of affection and reassurance in your ears. He makes sure to remind you every day just how perfect you are and just how much he loves you. 

Often you can be found in sneki boys lap with your head resting comfortably in the crook of his neck as he soothingly strokes your hair. Don’t be surprised if this sneaky kitsune drops a few kissed on your nose, cheeks or lips during these quiet and peaceful moments, just as a way to convey how much he loves and adores you.

Other potential matches……………..Masamune 

I hope you enjoyed it dear and i hope you have the best day! 

[kythed]

💕Hello! If it's all right was could I ask for a matchup? I'm a straight gal, 5'2" tall gal with pale skin and a thin form. I also have long brown hair, blue eyes and glasses.

As for personality, I'm kind, reliable and hardworking, though a little awkward in large social groups. I enjoy joking around and prefer looking at the bright side of things. My mbti is infj (and ennegram 9w1). I prefer my friends to be considerate and open-minded, someone who doesn't judge anyone by their first impression. I make a lot of bad jokes, so they need to have a sense of humour as well, or at least tolerance for mine😅

My biggest hobby is writing, which I think about almost around the clock. Fantasy and horror are my favourite genres to write, and for character inspiration I often do people-watching. I also sing, mostly in a choir, and go out for hikes in the nature because I love the fresh air and beautiful sceneries. My worst fear is letting people dear to me down and not being there for them in their time of need. I try my best to check up on them but sometimes I wonder if I'm doing enough . . .

My motto would be "If you're going to do it, make sure you don't have regrets later." as I strongly dislike leaving what I start unfinished. It makes me anxious.

My love languages are quality time, acts of service and words of affirmation. I'd like my s/o to know that I overthink often, that my silence doesn't mean I'm angry on uninterested but that I'm stuck in my own thoughts. A deal-breaker is definitely narcissism. Confidence is great but I don't like anyone who thinks the world envolves around them.

Thank you for taking time to read this! I hope it was all righ. Have a great day😊

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thanks for the request ! i hope you enjoy :-)

- this was an incredibly easy choice for me; it just makes all around perfect sense-- I match you with kuroo tetsurou

- you need someone to keep you moving in the right direction because you burden yourself with way too much shit that shouldn’t even be your responsibility

- he helps you to identify what you really want in life and makes you pick n choose a couple of goals to focus on at once rather than doing everything and anything (something tells me you have a hard time prioritizing and saying no to people)

- you help him stop n smell the roses every once in a while because that man doesn’t know when to take a break

- you both share this incredible attention to detail and you both highly value and love getting to know other people

- he’s the one who booked you your first appointment with a publishing house once you finished your first novel and he used his death glare to scare the poor publisher into giving you a higher percentage of royalties on each sale

- SCRABBLE. y’all play a highly competitive game of scrabble every friday night and you always win. this typically culminates in kuroo throwing a tantrum and tickling you mercilessly until you agree it was “practically a tie” (nevermind the fact that you literally won twice the points he did)

- you love fantasy, kuroo loves sci-fi so your conversations are constantly peppered with ridiculous rants and arguments (e.g. “who would win in a fight, a dragon or a tie fighter?” “definitely a dragon babe, i mean it has fire and--” “okay but what if the tie fighter was piloted by a jedi?”)

- physical touch may not be one of your love languages but it sure is one of his-- he’s constantly got his chin resting on your head, or he’s slipping his hand around yours, or putting it on your lower back-- he also really loves giving you these crazy bear hugs (like picking you up and swinging you around type shit) because he likes to feel all big n protective

- I mean the man is literally almost a foot taller than you so can you blame him?

- you guys have literally the worst inside jokes that no one else understands but they send you into hysterics each times until you’re both crying with laughter (lots of terrible puns, yo mama and knock knock jokes that don’t even make sense)

- like once y’all were on a trip to rome and caught a cab to your hotel from the airport but then it took a wrong turn and it ended up that it actually wasn’t a cab and you had just climbed into the back of some little old italian man’s car

- so now whenever y’all are driving somewhere and accidentally go the wrong direction one of you says “mama mia!” in a terrible italian accent and you start screaming with laughter ITS LITERALLY SO OBNOXIOUS LMAOOO

- because you’re both so intuitive that the relationship is like being two halves of a whole-- you can instantly tell when the other is even the slightest bit down and adjust your behavior accordingly

- AND y’all remember the most random shit about each other

- like he once absentmindedly mentioned he loved this particular brand of orange juice and then you started buying only that brand to stock the fridge and he absolutely loves you for it

- and on your first date when you went hiking you pointed out a clump of flowers on the side of the path you thought were pretty so on the way back he secretly picked one and dried it in the pages of a heavy dictionary and got it framed for your birthday

- honestly it’s just little considerate things like this that make the whole relationship

- he always makes sure to involve you in group conversations because he knows it’s your tendency to be shy and hang back

- good conversation is a big deal for you guys but so is quiet time-- you frequently cook dinner together without exchanging a single word, just kinda doing your own thing (like you’ll chop the salad and he’ll make the pasta) and listening to your playlist

- speaking of music, you used to refuse to sing for him until one day he heard you singing in the shower so he crept right up next to the door and recorded it on his phone, and then when you opened the door he shrieked “AHA! CAUGHT YOU!” which nearly scared the shit outta you and made you drop your towel

- but, ya know, you don’t even need to be self-conscious about your singing around this man because he doesn’t have a musical bone in his body and will think that every single note coming out of your mouth sounds like an angel chorus

- overall you guys are that couple that is just so clearly in tune with each other, you know each other like you know yourselves and it’s such a delight to see (hanging out with you is a third wheel’s nightmare tho)

your song: first date by blink-182 (he loves punk pop and you think it’s dorky as hell but he’s adorable when he’s playing the imaginary drums and head banging-- he actually got you to accompany him on the air guitar eventually and it’s lit asf) plus the song perfectly captures the easy, eager way you guys love each other

your favorite movie to watch together: the fellowship of the ring. he wasn’t really into the idea at first (he wanted to watch terminator) but now he’s as big a tolkien fanatic as there is. once you brought him to one of those fantasy renaissance fairs and y’all had the time of your lives.

your relationship in one quote: “In all the world, there is no heart for me like yours. / In all the world, there is no love for you like mine.” - maya angelou

[camillemontespan]

the world was on fire and no one could save me but you [drake walker x mc]

PROMPT: maybe a fic where MC has to reassure drake because he is feeling insecure ? i loved drake’s insecurity in the books because i felt that it was so real & so relatable to me as a reader. 

thank you to @tacohead13 for this prompt. I always want to give him a hug whenever he starts being all insecure!

@be-still-my-aching-heart  @katedrakeohd  @drakesensworld  @jovialyouthmusic  @thequeenofcronuts @notoriouscs    

hope you guys don’t mind that i’ve tagged you, it was just in case you would be interested to read this one :)

Camille’s ring glimmered as she fixed her hair into a messy bun.   The blue square topaz fit her finger perfectly; as if it was made for her, which was ridiculous since it had belonged to Drake’s grandmother. 

He had proposed and she had said yes. It had been two days since he slid the ring on her finger and he couldn’t believe that she had agreed to marry him. He felt as if he been gifted the world. 

The newly engaged couple were getting ready to attend yet another ball at the palace. Since Camille had actually rejected King Liam’s proposal and ended up getting engaged to Drake, there was  much confusion in court. Why had Camille said no? Why had she turned down the chance to be Queen? While Drake didn’t want to go to the ball, he knew they would have to face the nobles and settle any confusion. He felt more anxious for Camille, as she would have to fend off the worst questions, but as he watched her get ready, he knew she was calm. Poised. Ready to defend her choice. If asked the wrong question, she would take no prisoners because Camille never took any shit. 

She turned to him and gave him a twirl. ‘Well?’ 

Drake’s stomach actually flipped. She looked that beautiful. She was wearing a dusky blue chiffon dress, bias cut, and silver heels. The dress complimented her ring, which shone every time she raised her hand. ‘You look beautiful,’ Drake smiled.  He offered her his arm and she happily took it. ‘Let’s face the music then, shall we?’ he said, trying to be positive. It was only one ball. They could sneak out halfway through. It was fine.  Or maybe he would just drink a ton of whiskey to get through it. 

They entered the ballroom and as the sound of chatter and champagne glasses clinking together filled his ears, Drake wished he could turn around, go back to his room and lock the door. It wasn't like anybody would miss him. He hated nobles. He hated ballrooms. But when Camille squeezed his arm and smiled up at him, he knew he would do this for her, forever, if he had to. Anything to make her happy.  

Hana was the first to rush up to them as they made their way further into the room. ‘Aaaah you guys! God, you both look so cute together!’ She flung her arms around them both, squeezing them tight. Camille beamed; since Drake had proposed, she hadn’t stopped smiling. 

‘Camille!’ Maxwell waved as he saw them and he and Bertrand wandered over. ‘Niiiice suit Drake, you look like Bond!,’ Maxwell said. He loved a good suit. Drake blushed, not used to compliments about his appearance. He spotted Bertrand studying him. ‘Yes, Bertrand?’

Bertrand nodded, as if he had made a decision. ‘Camille has made the right decision to marry you,’ he said. Drake’s mouth dropped open. ‘But you wanted her to be with Liam!’

‘No, I wanted Camille to be happy,’ Bertrand corrected him. ‘For a while, yes, I would have done anything to save House Beaumont but I realised that nothing matters more than happiness.’

Olivia and Liam joined the group. Olivia took Camille's hand and studied the ring. 'This is actually beautiful,' she finally said. Camille grabbed her in a hug and jumped up and down. 'Finally, a compliment from Olivia!' Drake laughed and gently pulled her away from Olivia, who looked half violated, half close to smiling, and held her tight. He kissed Camille's forehead and whispered, 'You are so happy, aren't you?' She looked into his eyes and nodded silently. Drake's heart felt full.

Liam gave Drake a hug and turned to Camille, kissing her hand. 'It is indeed a beautiful ring. I'm so happy for you both.' Drake and Camille exchanged relieved smiles. They had been worried that Liam was upset about Camille's rejection but of course, Liam was always the bigger man.

Madeleine sidled over, a sneer already plastered on her face. 'Well, if it isn't the happy couple,' she greeted them. 'Let's see the ring then.'

Camille held out her hand and Madeleine looked the ring over. She gave Drake a smirk. 'Not exactly a diamond, is it Drake?'

Drake's jaw clenched, his eyes flashed for a brief moment, but before he could respond, Camille spoke up. 'It's a family heirloom, the sentiment behind it is priceless and that’s what important. Not that you would understand that.'

Madeleine laughed but there was no humour. 'He didn't even pay for a ring? God, just when I thought you couldn't get any cheaper -'

'Are you wearing an engagement ring, Madeleine?' Camille interrupted, her voice filled with acid. 'No? Then I suppose you can't comment until you can keep one on your finger.' Everyone fell into an awkward silence. Madeleine’s engagement to Liam being broken off, as well as to other suitors, were unspoken scandals. Madeleine narrowed her eyes. 'You may be a duchess now, and an engaged one to boot, but don't forget where you come from, Camille. Was it the slums of New York?' Camille smirked, unfazed. 'Soho actually. But trust you to bring up social status, I shouldn't even be surprised.' Drake squeezed Camille's hand. 'Camille, it's okay. Let's go dance.'

He lead her away to the dance floor. 'So, if I recall, you hate dancing,' Camille said, 'which means you must really want away from Madeleine.'

Drake groaned. 'Didn't you?'

Camille laughed and shook her head. 'I was about ready to rip her head off, you should have let me.' Drake smiled weakly and looked down at her as she placed her hands on his shoulders. 'I believe its bad etiquette to rip heads off at a ball..' 

He took her hand and placed his other on the small of her back. She had recalled right; he hated dancing. He never knew the moves and he always wanted the ground to swallow him up. Camille moved closer to him and they started to dance. About ten seconds in, he stepped on her foot. ‘Shit!’ he cursed quietly. Camille squeezed his hand encouragingly. ‘It’s all good, Walker.’ 

As they moved, they found themselves dancing beside Neville and his partner. ‘Enjoying stepping on your lady’s feet, Drake?’ Neville asked, his lip curling up in contempt. He and Drake had never gotten on due to the fact that Neville always felt the need to insult Drake. Whether it was about his social status, lack of wealth, his basic court skills... Neville found a way to antagonise Drake every time.  He believed he was better than most people which made him incredibly arrogant. 

‘I’m enjoying dancing with my fiancee,’ Drake replied cooly. He was not in the mood right now.  Neville smirked. ‘She looks like she’s in pain putting up with your lack of co-ordination.’ 

Camille glared at him. ‘Only in pain from the pompous chatter I’m hearing right now.’ 

‘Touche. The commoner has teeth.’

Drake stopped dancing and stepped close to Neville, his jaw set. ‘Don’t you dare talk to her that way,’ he ground out. Neville smirked. ‘I can talk to her any way I want. But maybe it’s her mongrel dog that needs a leash.’

Camille placed her hand over Drake’s clenched fist. She could tell he would punch Neville in a heartbeat if he could. It wouldn’t be a fair fight; Neville would be beaten to a pulp. 

‘Good evening,’ Neville said, giving them a smug smile. He danced his partner to the other end of the ballroom, twirling and dipping her as he went. Drake turned to hold Camille again, unable to mask his anger. ‘I hate that guy,’ he muttered. 

Camille leaned up and gave him a gentle kiss. ‘Shrug it off. He doesn’t matter.’ But as they continued to dance, Camille could tell that Drake’s heart wasn’t in it. He was distant, barely speaking. If he made the wrong step, he would quietly swear.  After five minutes, she exhaled and stopped dancing. ‘What’s wrong?’ Drake asked. 

‘Come with me,’ she ordered, grabbing his hand and leading him off the dancefloor. She spotted Liam and touched his arm. ‘Liam, I need to talk to Drake. We may be back. We might not. We’ve had a Neville issue.’

Maxwell groaned. ‘I hate that guy.’ Hana wrinkled her nose, which was her way of showing that she really hated someone too. Liam looked at Drake now, concerned. When he saw Drake’s despondent face, he understood. He knew how much Drake was trying to fit in with the nobles and not getting anywhere with it. ‘If you don’t come back, I won’t hold it against you,’ Liam said, giving them a smile. ‘It was good to see you both. Really good.’ Camille quickly kissed him on the cheek as a thank you and she hurried Drake out the ballroom.

They were back in Drake’s room. Despite being confused over why Camille had taken him out of the ball, Drake also felt relief. He was back in his own space. Sure, it was in a palace, but it was his room and it was just him and Camille. She found a bottle of whiskey and poured them both a measure. Handing him a glass, she cleared her throat and then spoke. 

‘Talk to me, Drake.’

‘About what?’

‘Tonight. Everything.’

He looked at the floor, his hair hiding his eyes. Camille sighed. ‘Okay, I’ll start. Neville is a pompous, arrogant asshole who looks like a pig and wears too much cologne. You shouldn't listen to his crap, ever. His opinion means nothing. Madeleine is a shallow, narrow-minded bitch who doesn’t know what a beautiful ring looks like. You go.’

Drake chuckled in spite of his low mood. ‘Too much cologne, huh?’

‘My throat literally closes up when I’m near him.’

Drake smiled and sat down on the end of the bed. He clasped his glass of whiskey and looked at his fiancee. She stood leaning against the wall, hip cocked, glass of whiskey in hand. 

‘I want to fit in at court but I also hate those people, so I wonder if it’s even worth it,’ he admitted. ‘I hate them so much, yet I really want to impress them... to show my worth, to prove that a commoner can be just as regal as they are. Hell, my dad was 100 times more honourable and brave than Neville.’

Camille nodded, listening. She was always a good listener. Drake took a swig of his whiskey and sighed. ‘I only feel comfortable with you, Liam, Hana, Maxwell. Even Olivia is getting better to spend time with, but only just,’ he corrected himself. ‘But Madeleine... I can’t stand her. She always tries to bring me down, bring you down. God, when she insulted your engagement ring, I wanted to kill her. My grandmother’s ring. But when she said I was cheap... I did think, maybe I should have splashed out on a diamond. Why not? I’m not made of money but I’d hate for you to think I didn’t care about my proposal or you..’ He looked away. 

Camille was over to him an instant. Kneeling down before him, she placed her hands on his knees. ‘Look at me,’ she said. ‘Drake. Look at me right now.’

His eyes met hers. God, he looked like he was in anguish. How could someone as kind and loyal and brave as he was harbour this much insecurity and frustration about himself? 

‘Drake, I loved my ring. The fact it belonged to your grandmother- who I imagine was a strong lady because how could she not be?- it’s so special. I am honoured to wear her ring. It means so much to me that I’ve been chosen as worthy enough to wear it and keep it safe forever.’ 

Her voice was fierce now as she clenched his hand. ‘I refuse to let you doubt yourself, especially about this. Your grandmother gave you this ring to give to the right girl and you respected her wishes. I only hope she would think I’m the right choice.’ Drake ran his hand through her hair. ‘Of course she would, Camille. She would have loved you.’ 

‘It’s a beautiful ring. Besides, you know I don’t like big diamonds. Topaz is perfect.’

Drake brought her ring finger up to his lips and kissed it. Camille had the talent for always helping him to feel brighter, happier, more relaxed. She grinned, happy she had gotten through to him. 

‘Now, I’m not in a rush to go back in there to dance,’ she told him. ‘But I like dancing with you. Can we dance in here, just us?’

Drake stood up. ‘Sure. I’ll just get the string quartet to abandon the ballroom and serenade us here,’ he deadpanned.

Camille giggled. ‘We could dance to normal music. You’ve got your laptop there. Got music on it?’

Drake opened up his laptop and found his stored music. He wasn’t into social media but his music playlists were extensive. He hit shuffle and turned to see that Camille had opened the doors out to his balcony. Set high on a hill, the palace had the best views of all of Cordonia. Drake’s balcony looked out towards the harbour and Old Town. Directly beneath the balcony was the hill going down towards the city. Nobody would hear their normal music. It was their own private space. 

Drake guided Camille out to the balcony and she faced him, smiling. She reached out and loosened his bow tie. ‘No more fancy,’ she decided. She wrapped her arms around his neck, abandoning the Waltz position. They started to dance like they were at a high school prom. Slowly, arms around each other. The first song lilted out of the room and out to the balcony. 

‘The world was on fire and no one could save me but you...’ Drake sang quietly, barely a whisper. Camille heard him anyway. ‘I didn’t know you liked Chris Isaak,’ she said, smiling. ‘Romantic. Sad but romantic.’

Drake blushed. ‘It’s a good song, okay?’

‘I know!’ Camille laughed. ‘You surprise me, Drake Walker.’

Drake kissed the top of her head gently and held her close, swaying to the music.  If he could stay in this moment for always, he would. 

‘What’s up?’ she asked softly. He smirked. She could read him so well. 

‘I just wish we could stay in this moment,’ he told her. Camille snuggled up to him, still swaying. ‘We have a lifetime of these moments ahead of us, Drake.’

He looked down at her and smiled. ‘I know. I just feel so lucky to have you. I keep expecting it all to be a dream.’

‘It’s not one of your nightmares,’ she reassured him. Before they got engaged, Drake had often had dreams in which they would get married, have babies, have a life together, and he would call them nightmares because he believed they would never come true. The things he wanted most taunted him in his sleep. Now, holding Camille in his arms, he felt like finally, the future was there for him. She was going to be his wife. They would have a brood of babies - he hoped, though he was yet to tell her that. They would live together and be happy.

Drake leaned down and gave her a long, deep kiss. Camille smiled against his lips and gently pulled him back into the bedroom. Slowly, she pushed him down on the bed and stood in front of him. As he watched her, she slowly unzipped her dress and let it fall to the floor, pooling around her feet. She unclipped her bra in one motion and then brought the rest of her underwear down. She then turned around, bending over to unclasp her heels. He had a good view. Now completely naked, she moved towards Drake and pulled him back to his feet. ‘Camille..’ he murmured, taking her in. She kissed his cheek and gently pulled his loosened bow tie off, running it through her fingers before discarding it on the floor. He watched as she slid off his suit jacket, unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off him. Camille gently kissed his chest while her hands worked at unbuckling his belt. 

He was naked now too. Camille looked him up and down, a grin spreading on her face and she leaned closer, kissing his neck. ‘This is the Drake I love,’ she whispered. 

‘What, naked?’ he teased. He undid her messy bun and her dark hair fell around her shoulders. She laughed. ‘Well, naked Drake is up there,’ she told him. ‘But I mean, I love you. Just you. I don’t care that you’re not noble or that you don’t know the steps to a waltz. None of that matters to me. What matters to me is how loyal you are; how honourable; how kind; brave. You understand me better than anyone else does. You make me laugh, even when you’re not trying to be funny, and you look at the world the same way that I do.’

She pushed him back onto the bed and straddled him. He skimmed his hands down her sides, feeling her warm skin. ‘Let me show you how proud I am to be yours,’ she murmured, smoothing her hands along his chest and leaning down to tug at his ear with her teeth. Drake let out a gasp and closed his eyes, enjoying the feel of her on him. Slowly, she moved a little further forward and he felt himself slip inside her. He hadn’t realised how turned on they both were. 

‘You’re mine?’ he whispered, cupping her cheek in his hand. She nodded. ‘I’ve always been yours.’ 

She nipped at his bottom lip with her teeth and he groaned. Slowly, they moved together, tangling the sheets around them. Drake sat up while she straddled him and he brought his arms around her, holding her close. Their pace increased and Camille began to cry out, disturbing the peace they had. He didn’t mind at all, he loved it when she was lost herself in the moment.  Kissing her chest, he murmured, ‘Tell me you’re mine again.’

She leaned in to whisper in his ear. ‘I’m yours.’

As they moved as one, Drake knew that all he needed was right here with him. He had Camille. He would be with her for a lifetime now. All that mattered was Camille, not nobles, not etiquette, not status. 

Just Camille. 

[ellistruggle]

The mysterious Sides of Amity

It was a rough day for Virgil. He just moved to Amity Park. The last few weeks were pretty stressful, to say at least. The packing, the driving, constantly thinking about the new town and how he would ruin his social reputation this time, were getting on his nerves.

His family moved around a lot. Virgil generally didn't mind. His social skills were not that great so he didn't have a hard time saying good bye to his schoolmates. They probably didn't even notice that he was gone. (Wow what a clichee)

This time it felt different though. This time the city they were going to was apparently the most haunted town in America. Virgil wouldn't say it out loud if you’d ask him, but he was honestly a little scared.

The first day he didn't leave the house, remaining quiet and peaceful in his room, thinking about his new school.

The second day he already had to go to said school and honestly, he found that quite rude. But Virgil accepted his fate and went to school, unmotivated and anxious as ever.

It looked like every normal high school you see in every movie. Boring and plain. Full of high school clichés and cliques. The jocks were present, the cheerleaders, the nerds, the band, all of them were here. Even the last bit of hope for a new school experience was gone now.

Sighing, Virgil made his way into Casper High.

As he opened the doors, a smiling figure almost bumped into Virgil, only to stop a second before a serious impact.

"Hi there! You must be Virgil! My name is Patton and I am here to welcome you into our nice little school!" The person began shaking Virgil’s hand and didn't stop for 6 seconds, making the situation very awkward.

Virgil, still shook about the incident, never saw anyone smiling as bright as this person. The person, apparently named Patton, was wearing a grey cardigan with a bright blue shirt underneath. Even though he also wore big glasses, they didn't distract from the big smile he still had. Virgil thought that absolutely nothing could distract from this smile. Patton began talking again

"Worry no more about a scary first school day because I am here to guide you around! I was new last year so I know how you feel. Believe me, I was very lost at the beginning. So I decided, if there is a new student coming here, I will personally ensure that this person will feel welcome and has a friend to come to right away!"

He spoke with such a speed, that Virgil believed he would suffocate any second now. And yet he was grateful to have someone as optimistic as Patton to guide him around. Normally he would find it incredibly awkward to be guided around by some student who just wants the extra credit for this job, but Patton seemed like he genuinely cared about the weird new guy on the block and that made Virgil feel a little more at ease.

They began to walk around school, every now and then Patton began to speak, telling him something interesting about Casper High, about the teachers that passed by or about Amity Park in general.

"Did you know that Amity is the most hunted town in America? I think that’s pretty cool!" Patton said after five minutes of walking through the school.

Virgil waited for that. He heard of it, sure, but hearing it from a person living in Amity? That made it even scarier. He couldn’t stop himself and he just had to ask.

"Haunted as in like, ghosts? Like… actual paranormal invisible ghosts? Isn't that kind of scary? How can you be so chill about it?" Virgil couldn’t hide the fear in his voice. He mentally slapped himself for sounding so scared right in front of the first person that was actually nice to him.

"The people here are used to ghosts I think.”, Patton began to explain, seemingly taking no notice of Virgil’s fear, “Of course it was scary at first but honestly you learn to deal with it. I mean, there are still people who don't get along with these creatures, but pretty much everyone in here doesn’t particularly care anymore when there's a ghost attack. Mostly due to Amity Parks own ghost fighting Hero Danny Phantom!"

 Virgil stopped walking and just looked at Patton with wide eyes. Did Patton just really say that?

"Danny What now? Are you telling me, that you guys have, like a super hero kind of person who saves you from the ghosts? Sorry but that sounds almost as believable as a cartoon show for children". He just couldn’t hide the sarcasm in his voice.

Patton just smiled wider and continued explaining. "But it's true! He came around the same time the attacks started to happen frequently. Put the bad ghosts back where they came from. At first, he wasn't very popular but now the town people accepted him as their own hero! I think that’s pretty cool! I mean, which other town could say they have a real life super hero who protects them? One time, an evil ghost king tried to rule over the town but Phantom just defeted him! And saved us. I mean, how cool is that?" Patton ended with a look of admiration in his eyes.

Virgil was sure Patton was joking. I mean, he just couldn’t be serious. First the ghost attacks, then a real life super hero? Just the thought about it seemed so ridiculous that Virgil decided, he wouldn’t believe any of this until he sees it with his own eyes.

(okay so, i am so sorry.. i know this is badly written and barely readable. it is basically my first fanfiction - like writing thing and english is not my first language and i am so sorry if you are used to better stuff but thanks to @davidthetraveler ‘s ask to make a Danny Phantom / Sanders Sides Crossover i had to write this and i know its bad but i want to continue and i’m just gonna leave this here and i have a few ideas but actually no idea where this story would end if it ended sometime idk... i am sorry for wasting your time i will stop now,....)

[tumblunni]

MORE UPDATES ON THINGS WHAT HAPPEN

The half week milestone of the hospital house thingie time! I think the term they use for it is "a residential stay"? Cos like its not a hospital its a shared housing block thats just full of doctors. I get to sleep in a real bed and there's a nice community room and board game nights and stuff. But its still really scary how intense the supervision can be! Like they have a window to look into your room once per hour every hour constantly. And they have to go through your undies and catalog them as part of the possessions check. I was not warned about that and it was mega embarassing trying to explain a binder to a bunch of old lady doctors! Oh and i had yo do a urine test today which was possibly the most fuckin embarassing thing in the actual universe. And you're not even allowed to take your own pills! They keep them locked in a big ominous wall of lockers and you have to come into the office and swallow the pill while theyre watching. I guess maybe because some people might be faking their illness and selling their pills on the black market or whatever? But that literally doesnt happen with antidepressants, they have no 'high' or even any effect at all on non-sick people. So it just makes no sense to me and its real embarassing cos like i said i suck at taking pills with plain water and without a straw. The ones i take are real damn chunky things the size of my thumbnail! I think i'l get better at not (literally) choking under pressure over time, tho. Hopefully.

Anyway that's all the bad out of the way! Now the good and the neutral and the just miscellaneous!

Its still nervewracking having to shower in a shared house but they have a cool walk-in shower and ive never tried one of those so it was vaguely interesting. And im allowed to take my showers early at 6am to minimize the chance of anyone else trying to use the door, lol. My biggest fear is having some staff member walk in on me when im naked like back in that homeless hostel. Oh or that time in the homeless hostel where the teenage boys filled the entire bathroom with inflated condoms wall to wall. Like wow so much damn effort to prank the stupid nervous bunni who probably would have been embarassed by literally anything else. Man this place is bringing so many memories of that homeless hostel but at least this time its a place specifically for sick people and they know i'm anxious doing shared cooking and board games and whatever so they dont make fun of me for it. But in a lot of ways that hostel had more freedoms too.. *shrug*

Anyway! A good! I get to have cooking lesson!! I know literally nothing about cooking and now i get to know several thing!! This nice doctor called Josie taught me how to make an omelette and i tasted ham for the first time! That is just how limited my life experiences are, lol. Oh and they want me to say that she's a 'mental health worker' not a doctor, but its all real confusing?? Like they have the staff that look after you and then the only ones we're supposed to call doctors are the ones who actually have the authority to prescribe pills and diagnosies. But like if youre in a hospital you'd call them all doctors, not just the actual surgeon? Or i guess theyre kinda like nursing home staff?? But they cant be support workers cos support workers are specific government assigned inspector type guys like Richard who only meet with you once a week.and i have to remember to not call him a social worker either cos social workers only work with family and custody related stuff. I dunno?? Basically the medical industry has a lot of names that dont really describe what the actual thing is, lol. Anyway the ham omelette was great and now im gonna try and remember so i can try and make it myself next time! HAM ACCOMPLISHED

Also i played bingo with a few other patients and it was fun but funny that i lost 6 times in a row when there were only 3 of us. I got a consolation prize of a pack of neon highlighter pens so hell yeah!!

I'm getting booked in to try some additional classes starting next week on monday and tuesday morning. The computer programming one was sadly unavailable, but i managed tp snag a place in "confidence building group therapy" and "basic how to use power tools". I wasnt really all that interested in that one but i thought it would be a useful skill even if its less fun. And maybe you get to actyally make something to take home at the end? A lil shelf to help organize this awkward lil room better, maybe?

And an unexpected bonus of being semi-hospitalized is that i get a free bus pass! And cos im here cos of my social anxiety theyre gonna help me get outside more and actually use this thing to the fullest! The first thing we did was the trip to actually get the bus pass itself. It was like "bus, take my money to take me to the place where i can never give you money again!" XD Ive been really stupidly nervous about going on tne bus in my old neighbourhood cos MAN it was really isolated there and everything just amplified my mental illness. An almost two hour bus ride to get to ANY SHOPS AT ALL, with only one bus for the whole town so it was always crowded and full of screaming kids and gossipy everyones. Social anxiety: maximum level proud mode!

So yeah i feel BIG ACCONPLISHED! I was able to take this bus for the first time with a doctor coming with me. Power Grandpa The Strong. His actual name is Paul and he has awesome sleeve tattoos of like anchors and dragons and sports teams and stuff! And he likes thrift stores and wearing silly hats too! Its like he's powerful enough to wrestle away everyone's anxieties! I was able to be a bit reckless too and i went out wearing my fave shirt thats like trans pride coloured plaid. A POWERFUL SHIRT IS REQUIRED FOR THIS QUEST! so we went to the office to register this bus pass and i panicked a bit cos apparantky we brought the wrong form and i wrote my name in the wrong box and then my passport photo looked terrible and aaa! But it all worked out and i was kinda freaking out for nothing. And he took me for a lil tour of the place and showed me this cool shop that does spray paint tye dye t shirts with spiderman on them?? Why does this incredibly specific shop exist and how have i never heard of it before?? There was also a new harry potter shop next to the disney shop, and the old used book store i used to visit as a kid was still there, complete with rickety spiral staircase and ominous basement trap door. I'm still not brave enough to go down there, but apparantly its just the history books section so meh. Then we actually went to a fancy coffee shop and i had this brain freeze mango ice frappucchino thing! Im trying all the new foods!!

And i was TOO HIGH ON DECADENCE and made a RECKLESS CHOICE! i blame power gramp's amazing tattoos, they were totally whispering to me that i shoukd screw the rules and ride off into the sunset on a metaphorical harley davidsen of mental health

So i was like Hey Paul I Am Totally Fine Getting Home On My Own, and it was like i was floating off in the distance somewhere begging my body to not speaketh these words. But it ended up working out okay! The excitement of it all and the sense of accomplishmebt from getting there all okay allowed me to mostly not freak out as i spent the day in town and looked at some shops and stuff. Basic Living Skills: Completed! I chilled out in the library (tho i dont have a card yet, alas!) and visited like five comic and anime stores, and got lost but found a Pizza Hut and that was SO NOSTALGIC FOR MY CHILDHOOD and it didnt taste quite as good as i remembered but the waiter guy was super nice and had a similar shirt and it was All Good! Oh and i gave all my money to a homeless person and that's why i'm broke now. And i bought a plastic slug! I just saw it from across the room and was like OH NO I AM BEING MAGNETISED TOWARDS IT OH NO IT HAS ALREADY BEEN BOUGHT. I need to think of a name for this new friend!!

So yeh i got home okay and i felt really acconplished and that was the furthest trip away that i've taken in ages! Man my mental illness makes me feel pathetic, but it also brings ridiculously big joys from the smallest of silly acconplishys!

Oh and thank you so much to the people who sent me emails! It really helped so much to keep me from giving up during the first few days before i made a bit of progress and felt like i could really do this, yknow? Especially big thanks tp the friend who sent me that mysterious super happy song that they found on a mystery disc in a german market?? Im still not sure whether its in greek or hasidic jewish but it sounds AMAZING and i hope someday i can figure out the band so i can hear their other singles!

Ok this is bunni out! BIG HUGS FOR THE EVERYONE AAAA

[langstuff132]

MEN NEED TO STOP GETTING OFFENDED WHEN THEY LEARN WOMEN ARE SCARED OF THEM

The man who hurt me said he was sorry. Everything was fine at first, and the ensuing roughness didn’t even last long. He swore he thought it was “all just part of the fantasy.” I was upset, but I was more significantly confused; I was having trouble imagining how my cries could sound erotic in any way. The man obviously regretted causing me physical pain, but did not realize how frightened I was, how angry I felt that I wasn’t listened to.  

Amensalism is a type of symbiosis where one party’s neutral behavior causes the other party harm. A common example is humans walking on grass. This is how men tend to see sexual assault. Women tend to see it as predation. “But #NotAllMen have violent intentions! Sometimes it’s a misunderstanding!” Ok…that is true. Sexual assault is certainly not predatorial in every case, but it is not amensalistic either.

It would be generous to call it a competition where one party clearly has the advantage over the other. The dominant party fulfills their needs by whatever means possible, and through those means, they harm the other party. (Predators are those who are aware of this power imbalance and try to use it to their advantage.) This is why women’s rights activists tend to support Yes-Means-Yes legislation, policy that addresses the fact that men tend to see the absence of rejection as confirmation, and then women get hurt without the man feeling responsible. The issue, as  Cathy Young points out, is that women give consent in uncomfortable situations all the time out of fear. You wouldn’t say you “gave” your wallet to someone who was holding a blade against your chest. In sexual assault cases, the blade would be something like 12-inch height difference.  After the initial violation, The man rubbed my back until I calmed down (without asking if he could touch me, of course) —which I could never completely do, since I was acutely aware that my companion was someone who derives pleasure from causing pain. Or, perhaps, more true to the competition analogy, he prioritized his pleasure while neglecting my pain. This is why it bothers me when people belittle the woman who accused Aziz Ansari of sexually harassing her. I know #NotAllMen are psychopathic predators, but #YesAllWomen have been frightened into silence or have suffered for a man’s benefit.

Vocal, enthusiastic consent is hard for people to swallow; we often talk about it as if it’s an obstacle. It’s the biggest challenge facing men on the path to sex. I want men to understand that deciding to be alone with them in a bedroom is the biggest challenge facing women on the path to sex.

This also begs the question, in my case, of how this struggle turned into a kink for people? What “fantasy” was The man referring to? Why did my needs not matter and why do some people get off on that? Poor sex education is one of the biggest contributing factors to this epidemic. If a school doesn't teach abstinence-based sex education, they probably still make sex sound transactional and goal-oriented as opposed to an intimate experience shared between two people. Since we’re taught that sex is over once you orgasm or meant to get someone pregnant, men benefit because they tend to finish faster (and aren’t the ones who carry children). On top of this, women feel societal pressure to pleasure men, but men feel no such pressure. This is bad, not only because women are getting cheated out of orgasms, but because it perpetuates their objectification--more specifically, the notion that it is ok and even biologically natural to treat a human woman like a blow-up doll.

Sexual liberation and education would help this problem, and my generation is starting to figure that out, but we’re going about it in a potentially harmful way. Dr. Jennifer Johnson, a professor at the Virginia Commonwealth University, did a sociological study of about 500 young men that revealed pornography is becoming a primary source of sex education. I don’t see this statistic as being such a bad thing, since, as Dr. Christopher Ryan asserts, “Nothing inspires murderous mayhem in human beings more reliably than sexual repression.” It really depends what kinds of porn people are watching. Just like you wouldn’t teach your toddler to swim in the deep end, you wouldn’t want your 13-year old obtaining sex education from BDSM pornography. However, just like stealing mom’s wine coolers or drinking orange juice from the carton, unsupervised kids do a lot of things they aren’t supposed to do. Anyway, this is more pressing than a child’s lack of etiquette, since Dr. Jennifer Johnson mentions that pornography is widely recognized as being responsible to some extent for normalizing sexually violent, dehumanizing, or degrading behavior. When Fifty Shades of Grey came out, women’s rights activists from all sects and corners of the world were anxious that there would be an increase in domestic and sexual violence to follow.

Unfortunately, pornography is incredibly difficult to censor given the scale of its presence on the somewhat lawless internet. And who decides what erotica is a damaging amount of weird versus a normal or healthy amount of weird? Some people even use Dominant/submissive relationships to deal with trauma—it would be against my liberal sensibilities to judge someone’s method of recovery. Maybe they should just keep it in the bedroom and try not to encourage their lifestyle..? Yikes--we’ve heard that before, and we didn’t like it!

I don’t think I have the authority or experience to make any of these judgements; but I do think there are some clear red flags in the online Porn industry that it would be easy for them to remove. Large companies like Pornhub have shown a liberal and compassionate side by coming down on deep fakes. Deep fakes are objectively quite impressive, and the audience for them exists, but Pornhub considers them to be a form of sexual assault since the person depicted can not consent.

So then what about rape-fantasy pornography? Don’t they see that the liberating effects of erotica are dampened by the sexual violence that occurs as a consequence of normalizing this type interaction? Just like deep fakes, though an audience exists for pornography with “Gang-rape,” “Rape,” or “Attack/Ambush” in the freaking title, it doesn’t mean you have to publish it.

In a broader vein, a lot could change if the media felt more responsible for glamorizing violent behavior. Luckily, a movement  is gaining speed in Hollywood right now to slow down production on all these War-hero movies and leave behind antiquated, aggressive notions of masculinity. The mainstream media is starting to understand that even though an audience exists for these types of stories, their implicit messages do long-term damage to society, which is a compelling argument to just..write other stories. And, not only do we want more young, sensitive father archetypes, we need more projects that convey explicit messages about problematic socialization. David Schwimmer's six short films about sexual harassment tell men quietly, but also deafeningly, that the behavior they have been seeing as neutral--even romantic or seductive--for ages, is actually perceived as scary, awkward, and silencing. The men who aren’t aware of this need to learn, and the men who are aware...are predators.

(PS this is essay isn’t a cry for help or anything, Im ok!!  it was actually very therapeutic to write)