#actually makes me stimmy and overwhelmed! <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[anxiousapplepie]

I hope god gives you one or more ppl to help you work on your Rose Knights thing because it's such an amazing idea and I really REALLY want a webtoon of it that posts weekly or something you have no idea. Please. PLEASE ILY AUHGDHGGHH

God has already given me a twin and elder sister to help me with some of the work for RK, and between them and all of YOU guys giving me so much unexpected encouragement and support I reckon one day Rose Knights will become a comic one day! Not now! Maybe not this year! But definitely in the future and that makes me so excited and happy to think about! <333

[cherry-sunday]

Edit: RESOLVED!! No more reblogs or replies are necessary, thanks! ^^

[Regular text: Edit: RESOLVED!! No more reblogs or replies are necessary, thanks! ^^]

Pls reblog!! Even if you dont have an answer for me. I'm a small blog and am worried this might get nowhere if I dont ask for rbs :(

[Regular text: Pls reblog!! Even if you dont have an answer for me. I'm a small blog and am worried this might get nowhere if I dont ask for rbs :(]

Post/question/information under cut

I was wondering if there was any term for uhh my kind of speaking stuff??? i really dont know how to talk about this topic bc i know very little on it so im really truly sorry if I use any terms wrong or say anything bad or offensive!!!! I'm just trying my hardest to explain the best I can

So I'm autistic (I think low needs??? Not entirely sure) and I know (a little) about non verbal and semi verbal and selective mutism and all that. I um. I was wondering if there was a term for my experience with all this??

I'm uh fully verbal most of the time. But sometimes when I get overwhelmed I have a hard time speaking. I can push out words but it's hard, but I can still manage to sound like a fully verbal person (maybe with slight hesitations in words). Like I said I can push out the words, but I'd much rather not speak or speak very little (i.e. if I'm overwhelmed and mom comes in my room and asks what I want for breakfast, I can force myself to say "I...want...cereal. Coco Puffs" or smth, but I'd much rather just not speak at all and just get up and point to the cereal box. I dont do that though because I dont want my mom to question why I'm not speaking, which would force me to speak more...) Also online when overwhelmed, like with speaking, I can push myself to type..um.. "correctly"? But I feel more comfortable typing...."incorrectly"?? I dont know how else to say it, but basically the difference between typing full sentences out like "I'm really uncomfortable right now, its so hot and uncomfortable and i'm overwhelmed and i want to stim but stimming just makes me warmer bc im moving around. I hate summer its so hot." and, quote from something I actually said once, "ICKY ICKY ITS TOO HOT ITS TOO HOT :(( im so overstimulated Stimmy doesnt help s +b@ becaus 3 it makes me warmer Icky icky icky icky I ahte hate Iss i hate Summer Its too w@z warm and and &u$bd uncomfy and make s me overstimmed especially when already overwhelmed an$d/or under pressure I hate this" like im rlly bad at explaining sorry but like. When overwhelmed I'd rather type like that?

And I see posts here from some autistics who type like this also, like with spaces before periods and incorrect grammar. That whole speech pattern?

Restating what I said at the beginning of this post:

So yeah wondering if this kind of speech......thing... has a term like nonverbal or semiverbal? I feel like it's similar to selective mutism but I dont go completely mute, its js harder for me to speak correctly

I don't know very much on this topic so I'm extremely sorry if I use any terms wrong or say anything bad or offensive!!!! I'm just trying my hardest to explain the best I can so I can get an answer

[Regular text: I don't know very much on this topic so I'm extremely sorry if I use any terms wrong or say anything bad or offensive!!!! I'm just trying my hardest to explain the best I can so I can get an answer]

[esor-ogramira]

9 people I'd like to get to know better

9 People I’d Like To Get To Know Better

Thanks for the tag, @rosepink-hydra!! :3

Last song: Badder Than The Bad Boys by Peyton Shay. REALLY fits one particular major character in Volume 1 of The Fenrathae Saga!

Favorite Color: Let's see... Brown, red, pink, teal, and uhhhh... I think that's about it!

Last Movie: ...I honestly don't remember. I have not watched any movies in several years, because I've just grown to dislike them. I don't know why I dislike them, I just do.

Currently Reading: Mostly webcomics. Since I've been very sleep deprived over the past two days, I've been avoiding Wilde Life like the plague because of the fact that it has some very disturbing content in a very realistic art style. Otherwise, I would absolutely be continuing my binge-reading of it!

Savory/sweet/spicy: All three, to varying degrees! General Tso's chicken is a must have for me when it comes to Chinese takeout, and because I'm a Buffalonian, I can never turn down a Buffito (burrito with chicken, buffalo chicken wing sauce, and your choice of bleu cheese dressing or ranch dressing. I always go with the bleu cheese!) from Mighty Taco. With regards to savory, I LOVE corned beef dinners, roast beef sandwiches, and pulled pork sandwiches! And with sweet stuff, I can never get enough of Haribo Goldbears (specifically that brand of gummi bears!) and Hi-Chew candy, cause they're SUCH STIMMY FOODS!! X3

Relationship status: A singular pringular. And probably gonna stay that way for the foreseeable future because being outside is often loud and overwhelming on a busy street!

Current Obsessions: Champions of The Gods (current working title for my story involving my former RWBY fan characters. It has werewolves, elves, dwarves, Magic, Corrupted Magic, SOOOOO many gods, and lots of dragons, wyverns and phoenixes!! >:3), The Fenrathae Saga (Still on mostly hiatus, but I think that just putting it on that status lifted a LOT of pressure to start making the pages of the webcomic before I'm actually ready!), Slime Rancher, Gunnerkrigg Court, ALL the active volcanoes in the world (special interest!!), learning about as many nuclear incidents/man-made disasters as I can fit into my AuDHD brain (another special interest, thanks in part to my mom incidentally leaving her copy of "Voices from Chernobyl," along with at least two books about Hiroshima and Nagasaki, sitting around when I was in middle school. I don't think she ever reprimanded me for reading that book, because I started to share the same interest in man-made disasters with her!), Mysteries of the Abandoned on Discovery Channel (Mom and I will sit down and watch these together. We LOOOOOOVE learning about this kind of stuff!)

Currently Working On: Champions of The Gods, The Fenrathae Saga Volume 1, trying to look for a job, trying to figure out why I now have nerve tingling sensations in both of my arms and my left leg (kept me from getting any sleep last night, along with how warm it suddenly got overnight.), and uhhhhh.... Yeahhhhhh, I think that about covers it! :3

@knightlymoon @felinewasteland

[m1dn1ght-hag]

☽ starring | Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub and Belphegor x gn reader

☽ pronouns used | they/them

☽ genre | general headcanons

☽ summary | The brothers with an MC who makes kandi/rave bracelets

☽ CW | none?

☽ note | :3

☽ — Lucifer

Not particularly interested

He’s aware you make them, but doesn’t think anything of it

Will compliment you when you show them off, but never really pays attention to it otherwise

So it’s a great surprise to him when one day when you present him with one

Probably best to give him a simple bracelet, I can’t see him wearing anything big like a UFO cuff (although he’d feel honored you went through all that time and effort just for him)

He wears it underneath his suit, out of sight from others.

It’s not that he’s embarrassed to be wearing it, he’s just too prideful to allow others to see the special gift you made him.

When he’s alone with you he rolls his sleeves up so it’s visible on his wrist; he wants to show you that he actually wears it, and truly appreciates the gift you specially made him

Diavolo saw it once and gushed over how soft Lucifer had gotten. Lucifer has become more careful at hiding it now.

He never really takes it off unless he’e showering.

He’s secretly so down bad for you and the bracelet means a lot to him since it’s a gift specially made by you.

If you make him multiple, he won’t wear them; but, he’ll keep them close to him, most likely in a drawer of his desk so when he opens it he’s reminded of how much you love him.

☽ — Mammon

As soon as he found out you made them he may have tried to sell some, but he restrained himself because he’d feel bad taking something you worked so hard on.

When you gave him a bracelet of his own, the thought of selling it was far from his mind. He felt so honored that you’d go out of your way to make a one-of-a-kind, special bracelet just for him.

To say he thanks you is an understatement, that demon will be smothering you with love, smiling like an idiot.

He wears it all the time and proudly shows it off, like “hey! my human made this just for me! haha, I bet you’re jealous!”

Let him brag, he’s happy <3

He’s constantly fidgeting with it— especially when he’s nervous or getting scolded by Lucifer, it calms him down and makes him feel a little more loved.

He takes it off when he showers, but leaves them on the bathroom counter. He gets nervous that someone’s gonna try to steal it from him so he always keeps it as close to him as he possibly can.

If you made him multiple he’d wear every single one of them. Though, he’d probably get overwhelmed wearing too many, so if you make him a lot he’s going to rotate through all of them throughout the week.

I feel he’d enjoy a cuff that rotates, definitely something fun for him to fidget with.

He’d probably try to make one for you too, so you’d better wear it because he worked very hard on it /lh

☽ — Leviathan

He would love them. Like, no joke, he'll get so stimmy if you make him a bracelet, he loves them.

He knew of them before he met you, he could vaguely remember seeing someone wearing rave bracelets before and found them intriguing.

Probably tried to make some of his own but felt the bigger cuffs were too difficult to work with so he stuck to making simple cuffs and bracelets.

When you make him a bracelet he’s so happy, but a little insecure. He feels like he’s not worthy of the effort you put into making this special bracelet for him.

He’ll wear it all the time, he won't show it off like Mammon but he won’t hide it either.

He fidgets with the bracelets, twisting them around his wrists absentmindedly. It calms him down when he gets too overwhelmed or anxious.

He definitely makes you a bracelet too, but would feel a little insecure when presenting it to you.

If you made him multiple he’d definitely wear all of them, I feel like he’d enjoy wearing kandi bracelets, they make him feel special.

Please make him a little kandi octopus, they’re really cute and I think he’d really enjoy them.

☽ — Satan

Actually really intrigued, he finds all the different types of things that can be made from kandi/beads interesting.

He probably watches you make things, staring intensely, almost cat-like.

He often compliments your work, proud of all your effort and patience towards making rave bracelets

When you give one to him he will be pleasantly surprised but he’ll accept it with a smile, slipping it onto his wrist right away.

He’s also one to always wear it in plain sight unless in a formal setting, he has a reputation to keep among his connections of course.

He doesn’t brag, but he always tries to secretly show it off

Will ask you to make him a cat themed bracelet/lh/hj

Probably asks you to show him how to make some, then later gives you a handmade bracelet as well

The colors sort of clash, but it’s fine because he made it for you <3

He probably won't wear any big cuffs, but he will accept the smaller ones if you were to make him more.

Probably also asks you to make bead decals for him to attach to his bookmarks.

☽ — Asmo

Would definitely bombard you with questions when he discovered you made your own jewelry.

Suggests you make a business out of it, he knows quite a few people who’d be interested in wearing those types of things.

Would be over the moon when you give him his own bracelet, would definitely be over the top and smother you with kisses but it’s okay cause it’s Asmo <3

He literally never takes it off, you’d have to pry it from his cold, dead hands to get it away from him.

Also someone to purposely show it off and brag about it, even if they also have a bracelet from you. “Yeah, well mine says ‘my love ❤️’ so I’m clearly more dear to MC than you are!”

He thought about asking for multiple different color combinations of the same bracelet to match his outfits, then decided he’d match the outfits to the bracelet.

If you gave him multiple, he’d match them to his outfits then (but he’d always wear the first one you made him, it’s the most important one to him after all <3.)

Would definitely push on the idea of making profit off of them, if you want too, if you’d rather just make them for fun then he’d still support you.

☽ — Beel

If you’d made any food themed kandi’s, he has tried to eat it, he couldn’t help himself </3 /lh

Other than trying to eat it, he doesn’t really pay much mind to it. He acknowledges your hobby, but doesn’t pay much attention to it farther than that.

That is, until you give him a bracelet of his own.

He gets all soft and cuddly after he receives his bracelet, repeatedly thanking you and crushing you in a giant bear hug.

He always wears it, unless he’s working out, he wouldn't want to risk breaking it on the equipment.

When he gets nervous or anxious he’ll play with the bracelet, it’s a huge comfort item for him.

He’ll try to satiate his need to eat by messing with it, but oftentimes, it doesn’t work.

He tries to be extra careful when eating to avoid dropping food on the bracelet.

Started watching how you make bracelets so he could make one for you, he wants to show his appreciation towards you as well.

Would probably ask if you guys could wear matching bracelets <33

Would also probably ask if you could make him and Belphie matching bracelets.

☽ — Belphie

Would be mostly uninterested. He’s sleeping whenever you’re making bracelets.

Wakes up when he feels you fidgeting with his wrist, only to look down and see that you had slipped a bracelet onto his wrist.

He sleepily thanks you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and pulling you into bed with him.

Be careful not to include sharp-ish beads on his bracelet, like stars. He will sleep on them and wake up with weird, painful, imprints on his arm and face.

Doesn’t go out of his way to brag about it unless someone points it out. Then he’s, granted lazily, boasting about it.

Treats the bracelet with the utmost care, he would be devastated if something were to happen to it.

He kisses the bracelet when he’s feeling lonely and missing you, but he’s taking this information to the grave.

He can’t sleep without it now, if he doesn’t have his bracelet he thrashes around in bed, unable to fall asleep.

He doesn’t seem like the type of demon who’d wear a big cuff, let alone many bracelets, but he’ll accept everything you give him.

Would appreciate a moon and star themed bracelet.

But he’s happy to receive anything made by you <3

☽ final note | :3

[auk-blogs]

Shitty things that happened when I last went inpatient

At the CSU, I was denied access to my fidget toys (I am autistic AND ADHD) even though I specifically picked out ones that couldn't possibly be harmful - a stuffed animal, a Tangle, a glitter tube, etc.

Every time I tried to inform the nurses at the nurse's station that I was feeling extremely anxious, IF I got their attention at all they would just tell me that "there's colouring pages and puzzles in the dayroom" like. No?? I actually wanted some kind of medication mayhaps a sedative because I was going fucking NUTS

I was denied my ADHD pill, Vyvanse, because and I quote directly, I wasn't "working or studying or anything." No. That's not how it works. I needed that pill in order to think in a coherent manner for more than 2 seconds.

Actually the denial of my Vyvanse might be why I was so goddamn anxious? YOU try not getting anxious when your thoughts are all over the place and just keep getting faster and faster.

The other patients kept playing horribly bloody, violent, and graphic movies. Like WHY do you even HAVE a DVD that has a scene where a pirate has to do abdominal surgery on himself with no anaesthetic?? That's just. That's just pure Trigger(TM) on a shiny DVD.

There was this ONE FUCKING PATIENT. Cheri. I will hate Cheri until the day I die. She managed to always get ahead of me in her wheelchair and she would sit and simper with her watery eyes and her wobbling lip and her wringing hands and this horrible look in her eyes... The nurses always paid more attention to Cheri than me even though I was fucking articulating that HEY I NEED HELP FOR (X) THING and Cheri refused to speak.

Sweater Guy turned my room's light off in the middle of the night. I was insomniac and reading. And also the only patient in my room. Sure it's not a crime or anything but it's really fucking annoying. I wasn't bothering anyone, why not just let me read my book in peace?

For a while the only time I saw the therapist was as she was speedwalking down the hallway to leave for the day every evening. She wouldn't even make eye contact with me.

It wasn't until I finally snapped and told them that I had figured out at least 3 ways to attempt aliven't on that ward that they finally realised that yes, I DID NEED SOME ACTUAL FUCKING HELP.

The CSU led me to believe that the next place I was going to was going to be a long term facility. I took that to mean at least a month if not more. I was ready to finally get some serious help that I'VE BEEN TRYING TO GET SINCE THE END OF 2016.

The CSU had a max stay of about 3 days, btw.

Well I got to Peninsula and it turns out that "long term facility" means 5 to 7 day stay. So... Not what I was led to believe.

I was strip searched, I believe is the term. Yes, I was forced to strip pretty much naked to confirm that I wasn't bringing any contraband on my person (despite me checking in voluntarily).

Like I've related before, I was "relieved of" my comfort items - my hardcover journal, some books, and my drawings. The journal and drawings in particular had content I wanted to share with the therapist(s) at Pinensula and I never got to.

When I got anxious about not having my journal/comfort item back, the staff were very apathetic to my literal BEGGING and just basically told me to suck it up and deal with it.

For some reason hardcover books were contraband?? Like what was I gon do, give someone a whack on the head? Anyway they offered me a composition book BUT IT WASN'T MYYYY JOURNAL and as any autistic knows one cannot simply replace a comfort item with a lower quality replacement.

When I, AUK, got too anxious and overwhelmed to deal anymore - Lizzie took over and threw a massive fit. We don't think we got chemically sedated, but we did get hoodwinked into going to a more "secure" ward and then when Lizzie was still pissed off, they manhandled us into a "blank room."

In the new ward, I was relieved of my clothes, my slippers, and pretty much what was left of my dignity. I was made to wear paper scrubs instead of proper clothes.

If I wanted to use the toilet or shower, a nurse would sit at the door with it propped open watching every move I made. No privacy. I eventually only used the bathroom once every morning and only showered once while I was at that ward.

The medication lady (unsure of her status - nurse? Doctor? Idk) refused to keep weaning me off my Lexapro and instead yanked me off it entirely. I'd been on Lexapro for a good while and uh. Ever hear of SSRI withdrawal? It is HORRIBLE. I still think she was totally unprofessional about that and should have fucking known better.

I am overly sensitive to sound and nobody would turn the fucking radio off. (All it played was Christmas music, too. *shudder*)

When I asked for more food, I never got it. I was so freaking hungry by the time I was released.

I'm pretty sure that the coffee was decaf because I got out into the world again and suddenly couldn't handle even half-caf. That means that the nurses were openly lying about the caffeine content - they repeatedly said it was full caffeine coffee.

There were supposed to be groups on that unit but like ...none ever happened? It was like the staff were so busy doing stuff that I couldn't see, that they didn't have time to do their jobs with the patients.

Did I mention that the manhandling left bruises? On my upper arms and also my right buttock from where the men forced me to sit down with all 200 lbs of me onto a concrete floor. Ouchies.

On my discharge notes, somebody wrote a note telling me to stop taking my birth control (which I take to regulate horribly heavy and long periods, not because I am sexually active). The discontinuation of the birth control was never verbalised to me. Never. Not once. There wasn't even an explanation in the note either.

Pinensula put me on what they said was an anti anxiety script but I looked it up and it's actually an antipsychotic. So if you go tell someone that you're anxious, you're psychotic? Like. What? (I understand medications can be used for more than one purpose. But I've been consistently prescribed meds that don't match with my self reported symptoms, and even meds that aren't MEANT to be used for the purpose they were prescribed to me for.)

I got so overstimulated while on the unit that I begged for earplugs. They didn't help at all, even when I combined them with a pillow over my head too. And then they went and turned the radio LOUDER.

(Although not relevant to me, there was this one patient who went ballistic over a hair being on her unpeeled orange ... She had been fiddling with her hair right before eating and she was the only one with that hair texture and colour on the unit... Yeah she threw a fit because she got one of her hairs on her unpeeled orange. Sigh.)

Did I mention that both the CSU and Peninsula are mostly for detoxing people? They just throw detoxing addicts and people who are having purely mental health problems in together. It is a bad system, because people like me who just need mental health support are often triggered by the detoxing addicts, and we get ignored by staff because the detoxing addicts are a higher priority I guess? They're certainly more dramatic.

My mum later told me that she was told that I was likely to be released early because I was "cooperative." Of fucking course I'm cooperative you absolute nitwits, I checked in voluntarily because I've been suicidal for like 16 years and I want some fuckin HELP

My mum tried to bring me a small stuffed dragon as a birthday present (yes, I was inpatient on my birthday). The stuffed toy was not allowed through because it was contraband. FUCKING HOW IS A LITTLE PLUSH DRAGON CONTRABAND? Mum articulated her distress as somethinf like "I just wanted to bring my autistic spawn something stimmy on their birthday" like fucking hell man, don't ever go inpatient if you are neurodivergent because they sure as hell won't allow you to have any coping mechanisms that aren't staying quiet, staring at nothing, and using dried up markers on a badly designed colouring page.

Anyway sorry this got so long. There's probably even more stuff that I forgot about.

Storal of the mory is don't go inpatient in Southeastern Tennessee, kids. You might be fucked up now but they will definitely fuck you up worse.

[timelessmulder]

odds for julian por favor :3c

u got it B)

ask me autistic headcanons!!

1. How are they with clothing textures? are they fine with fashionable but uncomfortable clothes or do they prefer casual & comfy? or other?

julian rly likes to layer and have clothes be as form fitting as possible, though he tends to prefer clothing to be on the softer/silkier side, which doesn’t always mesh with the suits he tends to wear but he’ll put up with it

3. how do they feel about touch?

he’ll tolerate it, mostly because of years of forcing himself to, but he’d mostly rather not

5. hated foods & textures?

he has ARFID, meaning like 95% of food is basically off the table to begin with (Actually due to my own arfid this is weird/hard to write Whoop)

7. what calms them down?

sitting somewhere dark and quiet, texture stimming (preferably, petting his cat Palla), reading

9. if you hc them as self diagnosed how did that impact their life?

i feel like he was almost definitely taken to a specialist as a child

11.how do they prefer to communicate? are they non verbal/have periods of being non verbal? do they use sign language? do they talk? do they prefer text, etc?

usually able to talk, has periods of being nonverbal. he knows bsl, which causes major problems stateside, and resorts to writing/text because of

13. their special interests?

science!! mainly forensics (all divisions of it, but anthropology is #1) and chemistry

15. if you ship them with anyone how is the other person(s) with them? (do they like listening to them info dump cause of how happy it makes them. do they know what smells/textures/places/etc to avoid so not to stress them out. etc)

rita likes listening to him info dump, and is slowly working out what to avoid. being long distance makes that part somewhat difficult. she also encourages him to be stimmy around her

17.  how do they prefer their hair? (if they have hair of course), is it a big issue sensory wise or is it not?, do they have their hair for style? comfort? do they find it hard to take care of it? or is it well maintained? do they have to have a certain product or is any ok?

he keeps his hair short for style, but doesn’t have any issues with it sensory wise. He’s very particular about keeping up appearances, and for product he can only stick to certain smells or else he gets overwhelmed (or arfid kicks in)

19. what would be their ideal happy place?

 a dim, quiet room, his cat purring in his lap with old books everywhere.

[autisticpika]

@circusbabys HOLEY MOLEY okay here i go!!!!! thabk u my sweet friend.. also lets hope tumblr doesnt mess up the spacing since im on mobile xD A- i have a few autie friends!!! most of them are on here (like u thwompus!!!) but otherwise i dont have many autistic friends irl. i have a friend at the b&g club but we are very different and i had 2 friends from my old school but we dont rlly talk anymore. if i do have any more autie friends irl, theyre undiagnosed i guess ? B- i love visual stimming so much!!! i have a blog dedicated to just visual stimmy videos @pokemonyello (shameless self promo lol) also i love tactile stimming even though my skin picking makes it restricting to tactile stim much. i also totally dig chewing on things from food to.. not food. i wish i had a chew necklace that i could wear in public :P i have one but its big and meant for babies so.. needless to say i dont wear it much C- i kkkkind of answered this in the last one? but more specifically i like stims like rocking when i can, rubbing silky textures like my lanyard/baby blanket (i like smooth textures like the silicone charm on my lanyard i have to stop myself from chewing on it haha) and i love rubbing my fingers together i was literally just doing it while i was trying to think of another example lol!! D. when i was rlly young just barely before i was introduced to pokemon i was really fixated on animals, specifically like insects (like satoshi tajiri!!) and dinosaurs! i looooved dinosaurs and owned lots of books on them. i also really loved steve irwin the crocodile hunter i sent a letter to him when i was 5ish :3 and of course pokemon came around eventually lol! E. four fun facts!!! hmm heck. im bad at this, i can usually come up with facts depending on random context better,, 1. did u know that the Official pokemon mascot was almost clefairy? they eventually decided pikachu was more gender neutral i gues (u kno... bc clefairy is Pink... thas for gorls only everyone knows) 2. did u know pokemon stadium in the us was actually technically the intended expansion to japanese pokemon stadium? it was meant for the nintendo 64 disc drive as an upgrade to the original game but the disc drive did not do well so they just sold it as pokemon stadium (1) in the us as a separate game. 3. super smash brothers for the 64 actually started out as just a plain ole fighting game! the liscensed characters came into the picture later because the makers thought it would make the game more appealing to have it star characters like mario, link, pikachu, and captain falcon. 4. (this one i just learned a couple days ago!) in super monkey ball 2, in the name selection before you start story mode, there is every letter in the alphabet except for lower case w! you can type a capital w but no lower case. also some levels have background things removed to compensate for space, like how the fish is removed in the level "URL" and the vegetables in the soup are gone from... the level with the multiple wormholes and the tilty small paths? i forgot the name of that level :'3 also in one of the levels one of the background assets is randomly yellow, even though that part isnt yellow anywhere else. i forgot which level this one was too haha. F. im a mixture of being loud and quiet! around people i dont know im usually quiet and avoid talking/interacting with people but if youre someone im comfortable with its hard to get me to even stop talking and i can get accidentally pretty loud xD G. usually avoider? i think? if im alone at home i seek sensory input but i avoid unexpected/uncontrolled noise or overwhelming feeling textures a lot H. lots!!!! i love big sweaters, shirts, pants, stuff like that! sometimes stuff like skinny jeans or leggings is okay but not too tight. same with shirts. i end up feeling really uncomfortable in tight clothes I. honestly i dont get many autistic related accomodations from people since im not diagnosed and im not out to most people.. but sometimes my mom will give me apples in my lunch but when she does she peel s the skins off of the slices because she knows i cant stand the texture of the skins. she is so kind :) J. https://youtu.be/rUEVjLvO6FA this video of me when i was about 11? very much me very much an autie child... if u watch it u can tell i clearly havent changed much hahaha K. usually my fav sensory outfit is about what im wearing now, except im wearing not as comfortable tightish pants also my shirt isnt as comfortable but i wore it bc its a pokemon shirt... so thats good. but my hoodie rn is a Good L. when i was little i always kinda thought they looked like hamster paws but i didnt really call them that? i used to do that with my hands bc my friend did it too but my mom stopped me lol. now i like raptor hands and kitty hands thats rlly good M. i always loved imitating animal noises, especially cats! i love meowing at my cat back when she does it :P also this isnt Animal mannerisms, but my mom said i used to try to make facial expressions and talk like i was a cartoon character which is still kinda how i see myslef haha! also i used to pretend i was pikachu even if i was just alone also one day i only talked to my mom in pikachu speak (pika pika!) N. i used to love mac and cheese but Only the kraft kind with the skinny noodles, i would not eat any other shape of noodles haha. also i went through a phase where i wouldnt eat anything with melted cheddar on it (which is weird bc now i love cheese) also one of my favorite foods in the whole world when i was in 1st grade were these little mexican chocolate cake treats they had jelly in them and my friend roberto used to give me them at lunch i wanted them all the time!! i tried looking up the name of them i found buba lubas and they were rlly similar but i dont think it was exactly those O. now i dont rlly? have "same foods" mostly because im less picky now and i will eat most things... but i think anything with dairy is kind of a comforting constant, like if we have rice and curry or soup or smth i always put sour cream/greek yogurt/ranch in it otherwise it feels like a chore to eat lmao? P. already answered!! Q. time for my own question!!! for my autie followers: did u guys ever have stuffed animals/toys you really loved or love now? u should share abt ur favorite toy in the replies!! infodumping is fun, feel free to tell me abt ur favorite pal as much as u want my dudes thank u thwomp for the ask!!! i spent so much time answering this it was a lot of fun :3

[stimtoybox]

Question

I don’t know If you’ll answer, but do you or anyone else know the best noise cancelling headphones or ear defenders for like a concert; and ones that aren’t incredibly high priced. Also any ideas of things to do to keep from having a panic attack and/or sensory overload?

Can I please ask everyone to not submit (as opposed to asking) questions when I have the askbox closed? (In other words, please don’t use the fact that I have submissions open as a way to circumnavigate the closed askbox.) It’s not fair on everyone who is patiently waiting for the askbox to open, and it’s also not fair on those who have been waiting a long time for me to heal so I can answer those waiting asks. When I do close the askbox, it’s because I’m in a situation where I need to limit the questions coming in to tackle those that are waiting, and folks who submit questions instead make this difficult.

Thank you very much, everyone, for your understanding on this point.

Headphones and Ear Defenders:

On the first point, I’ll ask for folks to reblog or reply on this post if they have any suggestions. You might also like to check out our category tag on headphones and ear defenders for various posts and discussions on the topic. I still don’t have a set of either that I would personally recommend for you, so I think that might be your best resource.

Panic Attack / Sensory Overload:

This is a difficult question to answer generally. I’m acutely aware, myself, of how general answers seldom suit my specific needs as a walking tangle of diagnostic labels, and I rather doubt that there’s an answer I can give that will work for your situation better than truths you already know. Additionally, the situation, circumstance and location often massively impacts what tools you have and how you can or should employ them.

So I’m actually going to ask you questions, because you already have coping strategies. You just might not fully realise them, or you might think that a coping strategy results in a more drastic easing of your experience when in fact it often just allows you to survive it. Sometimes it’s only skin-of-your-teeth survival. Sometimes it’s just the difference of being able to walk away from the situation and melting down instead of melting down then and there. I know we want tools that help drastically minimise or even erase the misery of panic or overload, but the honest appraisal is that these things don’t stop or erase panic or overload. They just help. I am saner and happier accepting that, as much as I’d sell my soul to not experience either.

I also absolutely and unequivocally advocate for avoiding things that overload, if possible. Avoiding overload is much simpler than dealing with overload once it’s triggered, and if it’s something that can be avoided, that’s one fewer concern!

1. What triggers your sensory overload and/or panic? Be general at first. List anything that comes to mind. Then try to break it down and find any smaller elements. Sit at the end of the day for a minute or two and think about how you felt at various times and what you think might have caused it. Keep on doing this. Even when you think you know, check in afterwards! Over time, you’ll be building up a list, and that list gives you information. It is much harder to decide how to handle a trigger, especially ahead of time, if you don’t know what your triggers are, so I don’t recommend skipping this point.

(Some panic triggers just can’t and shouldn’t be avoided, in which case finding ways to experience it more easily is better, but some might be.)

2. Which of those triggers can you reasonably avoid? If you can avoid this thing and it causes no harm to you or the people around you, do it.

3. Which of these triggers can you minimize or lessen? It might be that some of these things can be lessened, too. Can you ask (or have someone else ask) your neighbour to turn down their music? Can you ask your housemate to spray their perfume outside? Can you cut the tags out of your clothes? Can you go to the shops at a time when there’s less people shopping?

4. What does your overload feel like? Recognising what we feel, physically and emotionally, is difficult for many ND folks, especially we autistics. But if you can, over time, put together a list of experiences and sensations, especially with regards to early warning signs, you’ll have more warning about when an overload is coming, what it feels like when it does and what you might do about it. For example, knowing overload is coming and stepping away from the situation while you can still communicate to others that it’s happening, for example, is important if you lose all communication ability.

5. What does overload or panic take from you? What abilities do you lose? Wrist a list of these, too, as this will impact how you handle the situation. If you cannot read a list of response ideas on your phone when overloaded, for example, then having a list of approaches won’t be helpful to you. If you can’t communicate at all, having someone ask you unrelated questions as a distraction technique won’t work.

6. What worsens your overload? List these things, especially items that don’t quite trigger it but don’t make it easier to experience. You don’t want these things to happen when the world is already too much for you, and this means you can more knowingly avoid these things if possible. For example, someone touching me doesn’t trigger my sensory overload, but being touched will ratchet up said overload when I am overloaded, so touching belongs on my list.

7. What sensations can you tolerate ordinarily but not when you’re overloaded or panicked? Can you replace it with something always tolerable? I’ll give an example: if you can tolerate the touch of your quilt when not-overwhelmed but can’t bear it when overwhelmed, get rid of it and replace it with something you can always tolerate. Make your room, your bag, your clothing, your things, your personal spaces, as tolerable/pleasing for you as possible, no matter your state. This gives you somewhere safe and comfortable to be; this makes it easier to recover from overload. You don’t want to be out shopping and have to deal with screaming children plus the devil tags on your clothing. This is just an act of self-care, the act of making your environment, as much as you can modify it, suitable for you all the time.

8. What positive sensations make you feel connected to your body? It doesn’t have to make you feel amazing. List anything even a little positive. I’m talking about stimming as a coping mechanism - a means of delivering positive sensory input. It does help, in various ways, with overwhelm. List everything you can think of. Keep adding to it. Keep a feel-good list or journal! Do what society tells you not to do: touch clothing in a store, pick up objects on a shelf, listen to things, look at colours. Neurotypical adults are taught to shut off so much positive sensory input along with the negative, but since we can’t do that and have to live in the world they made for us, we need to embrace our feeling-things-too-much powers by finding positive sensations.

(Stimming categories include smell, weight/pressure, touch/texture, taste, movement/manipulation, sound and colour/visual movement. Most of us will have a category to which we react more strongly over others, and most of us will have a category to which we respond little, not at all or negatively. There are toys on this blog corresponding to all these categories, toys all of us here use when panicked and overloaded. There’s also a wide variety of blogs and games, especially for visual stimming, so this category is easily accessed via phone. If you don’t have a stim toy kit already, check out this post on stim toy categories.)

9. Are there any similarities between your listed positive sensations? Have you listed a lot of things that suggest touch-seeking behaviour, for example, or have you listed a lot of movement-intensive toys, or experiences relating to sound? Is your list pushing you towards one of the above stim toy categories? This is important for building your kit or choosing which of your toys or stimmy items to keep in your bag or on your person, as you want the most effective toys/items within easy reach.

(I will say that not all toys are suitable for public use, so that’s something to keep in mind, too. If you like a lot of visual stimulation, for example, I’d ask you to consider not using toys with flashing lights as your public go-to calming stim, as flashing lights can trigger seizure and sensory overwhelm in others. Since most of us in panic or overload cannot ask if others are bothered by this, we need to choose a non-flashing toy.)

10. Which of these listed positive experience/stim categories can best relax you? This ties in to making sure as many of your things are still accessible to you when overloaded, as “positive” may still not mean “calming” in a high emotional state. (I love metal, for example, but when I am very wound up any kind of sound isn’t calming for me.) Experiment here, if needed. Try different things and categories from your list to find out what works best. The more you think about this, though, the more likely it is one of these things will pop into your mind when you need it.

11. What sensory or non-sensory experience distracts you? Is this something you can employ or have others employ when you’re panicked or overloaded? For example, whenever I went into shutdown, my psychologist would ask me a question about gender, activism or feminism, because she figured out that getting me into analytical mode got me out of shutdown much more quickly than standing back and waiting. Do you have that one song that always makes you happy? Do you have a topic or special interest? Do you need to get away from people altogether and hide in a quiet space? Do you want to try breathing exercises or meditation? Again, list!

12. How can you employ these experiences? You’ve got your lists and you have some ideas as to what might help you, so now you need to make it accessible. Put the calming music on your phone, tuck a Tangle in your pocket, cut off devil tags, keep a spinner in your bag. Is there a particular way you mean to use any items on your list? Make sure these things are planned out and as accessible as possible, as it’s no good having a list, thinking about a solution you wish to try and then not having it to hand when you’re out and sensory overload strikes.

13. Are there external supports you can put in place for when you’re panicked or overloaded? Do you have a friend or family member you can trust, someone to whom you can to indicate--in whichever form of communication is easiest, be it by sign or text message or AAC--as to when you’re struggling, knowing they can support you? Do you need them to remind you to step outside, slow your breathing or reach for a stim toy? Or can you set messages on your phone? Can you keep a list of steps to follow on your phone or in your pocket? Is there a way you can help yourself reach for one of those distractions or positive, calming sensory experiences?

I’ll be honest: this is a lot of work. You need to be an explorer, willing to try and experiment knowing you might only find little pieces of ease here and there. An awful lot of things others use and discuss may not work for you, which does put the onus of experimentation and discovery on your shoulders. That’s hard and scary and a lot unfair, but I don’t know any other way.

- Mod K.A.