#actually getting up there and say we're not gonna take american nationalism for that to happen.

[therevengeoffrankenstein]

i saw somebody try to argue that no art is revolutionary unless it does something 'different' with the medium. that's a vague definition of 'revolutionary,' while still trying to define what is and isn't revolutionary!

sure, the average song might not change as many things as a statute, obviously, but a song is a medium of expression that political change could come about through. to totally discount art as a platform is ignorant at best.

their point of 'revolutionary' was meaning politically groundbreaking/having a strong political effect, which plenty of pieces of art, by that vague definition, have met.

the vague, generalized box of 'art' in its entirety, regardless of medium/type, is also so weird here, because it now calls into question what defines 'art.' is a speech not a form of the written word and/or performance art? is a painted sign being hoisted around a march not a painting, and therefore has no 'artistic merit?'

are you going to argue that no political activism ever has 'artistic merit' and no art ever has 'political importance?'

and this was all because of being 'annoyed' by people appreciating a black man for making politically astute and socially aware art. it doesn't feel like a coincidence to me that somebody would specifically argue that a black man's art has no real revolutionary meaning because it isn't 'different' enough or 'groundbreaking' enough, when he is in fact using his heavily broadcasted platform to educate people about race politics (amongst other things) in america via his music in a way we haven't really seen on this scale before.

i think maybe us non-black people shouldn't be saying shit like that and i also think that maybe you should shut the fuck up about defining things you don't even seem to want to define in the first place.

tl;dr: maybe i'm just being a sentimental shitlib but i actually do think that using art to make political statements is a good thing and we shouldn't undermine artists for having a political backbone in their art simply because it is art.

[shera-dnd]

I have decided against my better judgement to be weird about the Dawntrail MSQ

and we can't talk about an expansion set in the fantasy americas without talking about

COLONIALISM

oh yeah, we're going there baby

So disclaimer that I may be brazilian, but my ass is white as hell, so take everything I say with a grain of salt. Also if any native americans have made posts on this please let me know so I can boost their analysis as well

Also also I'm more than happy to delete this post if I mess up. I'm genuinely trying to make a thoughtful analysis, so if I fuck up just say the word and this thing is gone from this website

Oh also also also, Dawntrail MSQ spoilers ahead!

So FFXIV has had a... messy relationship with colonialism over the years

The fact that the major antagonists for the first half of A Realm Reborn a literally called "beast man tribes" is absolutely not a good start to this story

Add to that the fact that The Twelve (Eorzea's gods) are shown to be kind all powerful deities, while the Primals (the tribal gods) are evil spirits summoned to bring destruction to the world

and yeah no ARR is not good with that shit. It's EXTREMELY not good. If I hadn't been told it got better later on I would have dropped this shit before I got to Titan

But they have been taking steps to unfuck things. First we're shown that even the "civilized societies" (in this case the catholic elves) can summon Primals, then that Primal summoning isn't an actual native custom but was introduced by foreigners with malicious intent, and that not all "beast man" practice that

Then they changed the names of the "Beast Man Tribe Quests" to "Tribal Quests" and then finally to "Allied Society Quest"

Which would have been an empty gesture had like half of the post-Shadowbringer patches, as well a lot of Endwalker, not been about forming alliances with those people and working together with them, recognizing that they have as much right to the land and to life as any Eorzean, this all culminating on the Primals being summoned with the express purpose of helping you protect the world you all share

I guess they realized that they couldn't have their big bad for most of the game be the evil expansionist empire, if they didn't like actually reflect in their own imperialist fantasies they were propagating

Then the teaser trailer for Dawntrail drops and everyone in the fandom is like "wait... are we gonna do a colonialism?"

And memes were abound of how all those lessons from before don't apply to the "New World" of Tural

THANKFULLY the actual questline leading to Dawntrail helped to settle some of those worries

We're not going to Tural to explore a new uncharted land, but are actually being invited over by the local royalty in order to aid them with their right of succession. We get introduced to the nation of Tuliyollal and how it's a thriving land with its own culture and not just a "terra nil" waiting to be colonized

Still there are some worries that this is gonna turn out poorly and that we're just gonna end up being white saviors

But I think they managed to avoid that pretty well

For starters neither the Scions nor the Warrior of Light are the protagonists of this story. You're all simply supporting character's in Wuk Lamat's story

A story that centers her people, her culture, and her family

And it's not even one culture. They don't portray Tuliyollal as this monolithic mish mash of every single native american culture

No, the lands of Tural are in fact comprised of multiple different people's and nations, each of them with their own customs and traditions which are informed by their history and the lands they live in

In fact learning about their cultures and partaking in their customs is the whole point of the Rite of Succession. It's all set up so that the next Dawnservant would be someone who understands and respects each of the peoples that comprise Tural

(I could, and probably will, write about what Dawntrail has to say about what makes a good ruler)

And our girl, Wuk Lamat, is shown to be the rightful heir because she really goes out of her way to understand each of the nations and show her appreciation for their customs

Putting her well above her Sharlyaboo brother Koana, The King of Unresolved Daddy Issues Zoral Ja, and whatever the fuck is going on with Bakool Ja Ja

(I joke, I love my two headed traumatized dumbass)

Tho I will admit that this does end up giving the tribes a somewhat "planet of the hats" vibe. Like their named NPCs are diverse and interesting, but you can just assume that most random NPCs of any given people are gonna act according to the stereotype

Which is unfortunate, but I have hopes that with the next few patches and the addition of Dawntrail's own Allied Society Quests, we'll get to see more to them

But that... is only up to lvl95 and the end of the Yok'Tural (southern Tural) segment

because then we get to Xak'Tural (northern Tural) and holy shit does it feel like they drop the ball there

Like they really COULDN'T keep themselves from making Shaaloani a fucking Wild West map

Instead of doing anything with the actual cultures and histories of Native North American people, they just do wild fucking west

Because there's ceruleum in them thar hills! And apparently Koana turned most of the region into Sharlyaboos too

So we get a bunch of Wild West frontier towns mixed with native american tribes and mud brick cities. We have trains and guns and a sheriff and a duel at high noon, but now everyone got native american names

At least there's one group off to the northern side of the map who seems to stick to tradition and live in harmony with nature, and that group is shown respect by the other people of the region

so we at the very least avoid the "cowboys vs indians" crap, but my god does that region just feel bad compared to everything else they had done so far

Then we get to the big twist: THE CYBERPUNK PORTION OF THE GAME

because yes, we go full fucking cyberpunk

so turns out that a whole segment of Xak'Tural got colonized by the kingdom of Alexandria, including the lands of the Shetona (Erenville's people)

And I feel like this is the most poignant section of the MSQ when it comes to colonialism

Because here we have Alexandria, an empire that has reached the limit of what it can do sustain itself on its own world, and so has decided to spread out and colonize others in order to gain resources

We see the Shetona and other natives of the region being separated from their families and kept in isolation from the rest of their people

And tho Queen Sphene is shown to be a kind and caring ruler who gives people a choice when it comes to joining the empire, WELL SHE'S STILL THE QUEEN OF A FUCKING EMPIRE

Like her form of kindness and just stagnant peace is put in stark contrast with Wuk Lamat's own love for her people and more proactive pursuit of happiness and harmony

(again with the "what makes a ruler theme")

Also the people that choose to be assimilated into the Alexandrian Empire? Yeah, they're doing so because Alexandria has advanced medical technology and you can only receive their aid if you're a citizen

Not only that, but you have to be a working citizen. We see later on a character being denied medical aid, because he lost his job, thanks to the King's decision and at no fault of his own

yeah this is cyberpunk, not just sci-fi

ALSO can we talk about how the technology used for that medical aid and the little gizmo they give you to signify you're now a citizen, will literally erase the memory of the people you lost

So the Turali who are assimilated into Alexandrian culture not only lose ties to their culture and their loved ones, but are not allowed to grieve their loss, because what they once had is slowly being erased

How their choices add up to survive on their own OR be assimilated

How this all takes place IN NORTH FUCKING AMERICA!

THE CYBERPUNK CITY IS LITERALLY SET IN THIS WORLD'S EQUIVALENT TO THE UNITED STATES

So yeah, I don't think is is accidental. I genuinely thing that they're making a point about the realities of imperialism and colonialism, as well as taking some shots at the US while they're at it

Of course this part is still centered around Wuk Lamat, and instead of having a moment of "the only ones who can stop the evil white europeans are the GOOD white europeans", we have Wuk Lamat be the one to save the day, defeat Sphene, and save her people from the colonizing empire

So I would like to argue that everything that happens from lvl97 onwards is them picking up the ball again and making a real point

buuuut that comes at the cost of us being unable to engage with the native peoples of Xak'Tural outside of the context of colonialism

Which genuinely fucking sucks, and I hope it will be remedied with the post-Dawntrail patches

As well as handling the whole shared land situation they ended up with and how this might end up in a Land Back sort of movement, and oh boy can they mess shit up royally there

So in conclusion FFXIV has had a messy relationship with colonialism and imperialist fantasies and tropes, but the devs seem to be making a concerted effort to undo their mistakes and show respect in their depictions of american natives

They still fuck up

boy do they

but they're at least trying, and I'd say Dawntrail so far has been quite well executed

so yeah, look forward to more insane rambles like this one I guess

[kaccvcate]

Howdy everybody. I'm fresh from a research trip to the state capital, Jackson, home of the Mississippi Vital Records office and the Mississippi Department of Archives and History, which I now have a very fancy membership card to.

Before getting into my family history, I'm gonna rehash some stuff for the new readers. I adopted the name Panther from my uncle/father, legendary blues-punk guitarist Scott Panther. My biological father is the screenwriter and infamous madman, Rogan Russell Marshall. Rogan's grandfather had a Choctaw nation birth certificate, although his mom (my Jewish grandma) once confessed to my mom that he was actually the son of her Athabaskan friend and not her husband. She met her husband in San Francisco, and both were living on the Athabaskan reservation in Alaska when my dad was born - his birth certificate says Anchorage, but he was actually born in Tok. Rogan and I met when I ran away from home as a teenager, and to put it mildly he wasn't a good father. After one time he kicked my ass for no reason, I destroyed the paternity test proving we're related in a fit of pique, plus any old childhood photos, letters from my mom or mentioning my mom, etc (lol). I could probably call some office and get a new copy of the paternity test, which could allow me to prove I'm Choctaw if I wanted to.

For those who are uneducated, a genetic test doesn't show what nation you're from, it will just say "native american" or some such, and I don't care to have my my primary cultural heritage reduced to a tiny little number. I feel like the Europeans in my family have done nothing but take advantage of all my other relatives, not to mention I've never even known any of them, so it's hard to find pride in that, even if it's the only side of my family that cultural pride is socially acceptable for.

Since my mom's family completely raised me, I tend to think of myself as being Muskogee. Passed down from my mom's side are a lot of verbal and cultural traditions. My great grandmother understood Muskogee, she passed on a few names for plants and foods to my grandma. Several folk stories and family recipes I found corroborated by other Muskogee people online, and there are a lot of small things like how my family would make spoons, birdhouses, and other crafts from sculpted dried squash, general philosophic ideas, the fact that we never went to church and were raised to respect women, etc. My mom told me all about the game stickball when I was young, and knew many details of how it was played and its place in Muskogee society, information passed down from her grandma, despite the fact that my relatives are totally disinterested in other sports of any kind. I also have a very thick and distinctive accent, and was questioned on my nationality by other native people I met several times as a child, before I ever brought it up to my family. In high school I had a Cherokee art teacher named Dr. Craig Kirk, he was the first to ask if I had ever been to New Mexico. The second was a Dine lady named Summer Bear, a regular at a bar I worked at in Tampa, Florida, in 2019. Both conversations went basically like this:

Them: Where are you from?

Me: Mississippi.

Them: Your accent reminds me of people I've met in New Mexico.

Me: That's weird, I've never been to New Mexico.

Them: Well you should probably ask your family about it.

A lot of Muskogees and other southeast natives went to New Mexico as refugees, so there are quite a few people with my accent living there. In Albuquerque I felt right at home, it's a breathtakingly beautiful city, surrounded by incredible wildlife parks, well worth visiting.

Being native was never discussed openly when I was young, I honestly figured as a kid that everyone knew all about native crafts and folklore. As an adult I've obviously found this is not the case. My mom is honestly a bit racist against black people, and she would ensure I attended majority white schools when she could. When white kids at school would make fun of the way I look and talk, I just figured I was ugly and stupid. I never made enough close European friends to know that my experiences were unusual. My few friends in childhood were black, mestizo, Jewish, or Asian, I only had one friend whose family were recent immigrant Scottish pagans. For the most part I was badly abused and always acting out, so I was extremely isolated and couldn't keep anyone around long. When I moved to Europe at 15 I felt so out of place that within 6 months I almost killed myself, ran away from home, and ended up back in the States because of it. Last year I visited Okmulgee, the capital of the modern day Muskogee nation in Oklahoma, and spent a few days hanging out at the local bar and talking to people in the linguistic preservation office and at the university. Just at face value, no one questioned my heritage or doubted me for even a second. Actually one guy asked me about my other native heritage, because I seemed too native to have only one great-great grandparent.

So this brings me to my research today. My grandma's and mom's verbal lore is that my great great grandma was definitely over 100 when she died based on historical events she remembered, but never had an official birth certificate (Mississippi only began to print them in 1917 I think.) My grandma told me her actual Muskogee name only once, and I immediately forgot it because as I said, I am very stupid. In searching for records I discovered that she has an official European name and lineage, Emma Susie Schultz, gravestone marked 1910-1998. There is a recorded birthdate for her in 1910, which would obviously make her only 88, despite the fact that in the photo I've seen from when she died, she looked way older, impossibly old. If she's German, how the hell did she know how to speak Muskogee? There's just way too much evidence that she was native for me not to believe it. In one hand-drawn portrait from when she was young, which my grandma had framed on the wall, she had straight dark hair in Princess Leia type buns, a traditional Muskogee hairstyle, and simply didn't look like any Aryan I've met, and that's aside from all my other experiences. My best guess is that she was adopted and the family hid all evidence, I genuinely can't think of anything else. It wouldn't be too surprising as one of my great great aunts was also black, obviously of African descent, but when my mom asked my great aunt about it, she said "What are you talking about? That's your great aunt Naomi, she wasn't black." This while literally looking at a photo of a woman being black. Mississippi and Alabama (where my family lived also) were segregated until the 1960s, so there was quite a lot of social pressure to declare yourself to be white. It wasn't just separate bathrooms and drinking fountains, for a long time non-whites couldn't own property. So for the time and place my relatives must have been extraordinarily accepting and open-minded.

Hope you enjoyed tonight's little window into hell. Thanks for reading.

[junkopottershima]

An Early 2000's Child's Observation on Zutara Shipping War.

I awoke from my slumber upon discovering the Avatar fanbase, and the absolute shipping war that I never really gave a shit about until now. Zutara is a relatively new ship to me, as is any other ship that isn’t canon, so I’m gonna run through the list of anti-zutara arguments that I’ve found, and list out my takes on them. I’m doing this, because although I see lots of love for Zutara, there’s some aspects about Katara and Zuko’s relationship in the show that makes me question how well their “chemistry” would actually work. For that, I’m genuinely curious and even politely asking “Zutarians” to please step up and respond with their takes on arguments against Zutara. Though, I should mention that there's going to be some anti-zutara takes that I don't agree with. I'll just be getting them off my chest. Welp, here we go now:

"Zutara can't work because it's Oppressor x Oppressed".

I've seen people saying this, and then saying that you can only "truly" agree/disagree with this point if you're an oppressed ethnicity, class, or whatever. Well, I guess as an African American woman, I honestly think the argument that "Zuko and Katara absolutely cannot work out because he's the colonizer and she's the victim" is rather dumb and blatantly ignores the fact that Zuko was trying to change his ways. Like, that argument is so stupid to me, it's almost offensive. We see Zuko change and try to keep changing his perspective on other nations and foreigners, and the step he takes to do that is by standing up to his father on the day of the eclipse and declaring his new mission to find and help Aang and his friends stop the war. Ozai wasted no time trying to do what he wanted since day 1 of Zuko's life, which was to end him. Zuko put his life on the line to change his ways. If we're going by the logic that Zuko can't be healthy for Katara because he's an oppressor...what the fuck was the point of him trying to gain their trust and trying to help Aang take down his father...if he's an oppressor? If we're going off the logic that Katara should not trust Zuko because he (more like his father and father's army) is an oppressor, shouldn't that apply to the rest of the Gaang as well by the fact that each of their nations and cultures were/are threatened by the Fire Nation? Going off of that logic, it becomes easy to say that Zuko should have never gotten a chance to even be friends with Aang, Sokka, Katara, Toph, and Suki just because his family consists of war-mongering assholes, but why would anyone say that when it's shown that Zuko is actively trying to change his ways at that point? Also, if we're go there (the colonizer stuff), it's almost like saying white people should never be dating any nonwhite solely because many whites in positions of power abuse it to subjugate nonwhites. It blatantly ignores the real-life contexts and instances where individual whites mean no harm and are able to get along with other races. It blatantly ignores the instances of whites being able to find genuine love with people from other races, even in hard times like the Civil Rights Era and various wars. We can see that it's fucked up to generalize...so why do we gotta do that with Zuko? Keep in mind, I'm talking about the point where Zuko is officially redeeming himself.

"It would make no sense for Katara and Zuko to end up together at the end--They only had limited time together".

Now this, I definitely agree with. I understand that Zutarians loved the hell out of Zutara and rooted for them to be together at the series finale, but the in-lore time and development Katara had with Aang, and Zuko with Mai is objectively more grounded and overwhelming than all the "evidence" that Zuko would have had a great romance with Katara. Even with Zuko having redeemed a lot about himself in his arc at season 3 and AFTER Katara learns to trust him, there's literally no time for them to develop any romantic feelings or a relationship because Sozin's Comet was just like several days away at that point. Even in the catacombs of Ba Sing Se, Katara's moment with offering to heal Zuko's scar and to really establish a bond was interrupted by Aang and Iroh before she could waste her spirit water on him--THEY HAD NO TIME. Meanwhile, Mai and Zuko were childhood friends, and knew each other for basically their whole lives. Plus, they were dating throughout the series. In practicality, isn't it going to be Mai that would make the most sense as a love interest due to the fact that of all candidates, Mai understands Zuko the most? Isn't it Mai that Zuko has took the time to write a letter for in the prison, smile and laugh for? With Mai, we see Zuko at his most happy. Point is, Mai is objectively a very important love interest to Zuko, so even though they broke up several times before, I don't think Zuko is the type to just throw his tears away and immediately move on. I mean seriously, Jin was more like a rebound fling and Zuko didn't even blink when he dipped back to the Fire Nation. And I don't think I need to pull up the entire show just to list examples of Aang and Katara having each other's backs and developing an unbreakable bond. Zuko and Katara didn't have the time to develop romantic feeling for each other at their best and even if they had an infatuation for one another, wouldn't Zuko's bond and romantic feelings for Mai predictably just bubble to the surface again? I mean Zuko lost no sleep when he basically ditched Jin and went straight back to Mai. No offense to anyone who loves Jin/Zuko, I'm just telling it as it is.

"Zuko does not consistently consider Katara's feelings".

Again, this is true. After returning to the Fire Nation, Zuko isn't shown to be shaken by his betrayal to Katara. He's just not thinking about her during his time back home. But what I definitely want to talk about is the part where he joins the Gaang, and Katara is vocally distrustful of him. This is the aspect of Zuko and Katara's relationship that has always stopped me from actually shipping them together. Katara is vocal, again and again, that she doesn't trust Zuko because of his history with basically being a serious asshole bounty hunter for the avatar, because of him betraying her trust back in Ba Sing Se, and the fact that she personally blamed Zuko for her mother's death due to associating him with Fire Nation scum. Now while Katara is clearly bothered by his presence in the Gaang, Zuko literally didn't care and was on-board to keep on trucking. It's only after it gets too annoying does Zuko now care about Katara's feelings, and what does he lead with? "This is so unfair!". Upon confronting Katara about her feelings, Zuko immediately declaring that Katara was being unfair just reveals that Zuko was thinking more about himself in this moment. That Zuko didn't do anything wrong, that Zuko must not have done anything wrong because Zuko does not even remember what he did to piss off Katara. Katara is the one that has to check him by explaining why she doesn't like him: his betrayal, her perception of his affiliation with the Fire Nation, and PROBABLY the fact that he sent 'sparky sparky boom boom' man after Aang. Right after that, Zuko goes to see Sokka about he and Katara's mother, and while that's very considerate of Zuko...it shows that he's kind of ignorant about properly apologizing for his wrongs. He skipped doing any apology for what happened in Ba Sing Se, and went straight to "Okay, what's the deal with her mom?". It's nice that Zuko gave Katara the option to do a Quentin Tarantino mission on the dude that murked her mom, but the fact that Zuko put Katara's vocal disapproval and Ba Sing Se event kind of on the back burner of his concerns isn't quite a good look. It shows that Zuko, although in redemption, still possessed from listening problems.

Also, when searching for different takes on Zutara, I found a post by a particular user that I don't remember. But basically, in critiquing Zutara the user mentioned Katara threatening Zuko that she would "end his destiny personally" was 'abuse'. I believe this user is called, 'erin-the-brave'. Well in my opinion, that just wasn't an intelligent perspective on Katara's dialogue. In Katara's perspective, Zuko has been chasing her, Sokka, and Aang across the world to capture him, which to her would mean the doom for the world. Zuko taunts Katara about her mother's necklace, using it to try bringing her into giving up Aang. Zuko is randomly living in Ba Sing Se, and right after she has a short bonding moment with him, he immediately choses to help Azula kill Aang. Zuko then sends an assassin after Aang, in which that assassin locks Katara and Toph up in a jail cell as bait. I get that Zuko helped free her dad and Suki from prison, but goddamn, how the fuck else do you expect Katara to react to Zuko's sudden redemption? Even if he IS trying? Katara isn't a fucking mind reader. Like how did you genuinely expect her to react? "Oh you poor thing! Let me welcome you with wide open arms so I can kiss your ass and wipe it with a sample of spirit water"???

"Oh Katara's being abusive to Zuko because she was telling him that she'll end his life if he hurts Aang again, even though Zuko HAS repeatedly tested everybody in the Gaang". Could it serve as an argument that Katara wasn't given much time to learn with, and trust Zuko in order for a romantic relationship to work? I think so. But would I say Katara's reaction to Zuko's second redemption is 'abuse'? No. I think it would be overreacting to even call that verbal abuse, because in Katara's shoes, who wouldn't be wary of Zuko?

"Zuko was pushing Katara to be a murderer in The Southern Raiders, he was bringing out the worst in her".

I actually disagree with this. Zuko merely told Katara that he knows the guy who killed her mother, and that would help her find him. If I recall correctly, he didn't push or pressure her into actually killing him. He merely offered her a journey to find the fucker who took her mother's life. Katara contemplating murder, going on the trip, and even blood bending during the mission was 100% her own choice. The fact that Katara almost instantly chose this journey with Zuko seems to imply that this was something she always wanted to do, but just never got the chance for: confronting her mother's killer. Even after Katara chose not to kill the guy, Zuko didn't hold her choice against her. He doesn't belittle her, nor did he ever pressure her to twist Yon Rha to death like a pretzel. Zuko actually tells Katara that her ability to be better than Yon Rha was a person strength, and Zuko even seems proud of her in that moment. He gave Katara the chance for closure, she took it, she tackled the confrontation in her own way as Zuko let her have her spotlight, and they walked away with him being proud of her.

"Zutara would be better if you just replaced Zuko with Azula in the ship".

This is a joke, right? Because the only way this could get funnier is if you threw in Ozai.

"a fic which does 'ATLA’s plot goes almost exactly as canon, except my favorite ship happens' is not clever or innovative".

....it's fanfiction with endless creativity, writing styles, and brains behind it. Rewriting the show's beginning, midsection, endgame, or all of the above is objectively creative and at least a little innovative. Fanfiction absolutely can be creative and innovative, you don't have to lie just because you don't like a ship, my brother.

"Katara offering to heal Zuko's scar is actually evidence that she does NOT fully understand Zuko"

I've seen this take and I think it's one of the best arguments against Zutara, to be honest. A user named 'Maikingsenseofit' explained it so well, I'm just gonna copy and paste it:

"Upon seeing his scar, her immediate thought is to use spirit water to heal it. While this is an outstanding demonstration of kindness for someone she is not obliged to show it to, let’s remember that right before this Zuko says:

“It's okay. I used to think this scar marked me. The mark of the banished prince, cursed to chase the Avatar forever. But lately... I've realized that I'm free to determine my own destiny, even if I'll never be free of my mark.”

This. Right here. It is so important to understand. Zuko’s scar is so much more than a scar. It represents his trauma from his father, the trials and tribulations he faced to earn Ozai’s approval, and is a further reminder that he is the black sheep of the family both figuratively (a son who could never live up to his title, who could never bend like he was supposed to) and literally (the only member of a pristine royal family with an ugly brand on his face).

But his journey with Uncle Iroh in Ba Sing Se allows him to come to terms this trauma, or moreover this scar. It’s a reminder that we cannot escape our past or try to stifle it. We must embrace it and learn to accept it. It is only then that we are fully liberated from the shackles of our trauma and can fully determine our paths forward.

Katara’s offer to get rid of Zuko’s scar represents a regression of Zuko’s hard earned realization. He had just come to terms with his troubled past and accepts the ephemeral mark on his face. He even wears it with pride. He doesn’t try to hide his past or stifle his trauma, not anymore. It is an integral part of who he is. It is what makes Zuko, Zuko.He vocalizes this to Katara immediately before this. Katara however, fails to understand the significance and the journey behind this mark, largely in part because she wasn’t there to witness it. Her attempt to heal his scar falls flat in several ways, but one main reason is because just because something is healed physically, doesn’t mean it’s healed emotionally. But it’s important to consider something else here: Zuko never explicitly asks Katara or verbalizes a desire to get rid of his scar. Based on the earlier conversation, he’s finally gotten around to embracing it and welcoming the significance behind it. What Katara offers is in stark contrast to what he said. He allows her to touch his scar, but it is evident that she would never heal it. Why?

From Belen Edwards, despite the traumatic memories associated with his scar, Zuko never seems particularly ashamed of it. Throughout season 1, his hairstyle ensures that it's completely exposed, showing his identity to the world. In the second season, Zuko tells Katara that he's beginning to accept that he won't be rid of the scar.

And yet despite hearing the last part, Katara still offers a solution to Zuko to get rid of it.

This is where we see that the so called deep understanding and caring that Zuko and Katara held for each other is beginning to crack. Where is Katara’s deep and profound, soul-ular (get it, like cellular?) understanding of Zuko that no one else, other than Iroh, had of him? It begs us to ask if Iroh was in that room, given the journey he embarked on with his nephew both physically and emotionally, would he have encouraged Katara to get rid of this mark? The answer is obviously no. If there is a deep vulnerability and intimacy that they share with each other, and no one else, it does seem pointless given on both ends neither understands the full depth of the other’s situation. This is exemplified by Zuko immediately forgetting his entire interaction with Katara (but not His interaction with Aang interestingly) afterwards and still failing to understand why Katara was mad at him, even AFTER she explicitly tells him. And this is exemplified by Katara not fully acknowledging and understanding Zuko’s acceptance of his scar and offering a surface level solution that will never address the emotional significance and tribulations that come with it. Nothing against either of the characters by the way, and I need to emphasize that in bold font. I am simply observing their interactions and dispelling these “Word of God”-like claims.

Consider Zuko’s interactions with Mai. When he first sees her after years of banishment she gently his scar and touches in it not in an attempt to get rid of it, but because it is a part of Zuko. And when it comes to kissing Zuko, it means touching his scar, touching him in his entirety- including his physical and emotional marks. There’s a deliberate reason why the storyboard artists included Zuko’s scar in the scene. Because she’s known Zuko her whole life and was there when he first received it. Zuko and his scar are not two separate entities for her. They are one and the same"

End dialogue.

What should be mentioned is that Zutarians do like to say that "Katara is the first person to ever touch his scar"...which to be honest, I just don't believe. I just don't believe that Katara got to touch his scar before Iroh or Mai ever did, because it would insinuate that Iroh and Mai have never caressed the side of Zuko's face to comfort him, and after all those years of being close with them. Then there's the claim that Katara is the only person Zuko opens up to in the Gaang, even though he talked about some of his feelings to Toph, talked about some of his feelings to Sokka, and talked about some of his feelings to Aang. When Zuko snatched Aang and hustled themselves into a cave in the middle of blizzard nowhere, Zuko opens up about his rough childhood to Aang. Yes, Aang wasn't conscious to listen, but Zuko DID talk to him. Perhaps Katara is the first member of the Gaang that Zuko opened up to (the "mom talk" in Ba Sing Se) without the other person being too out-of-conscious to listen, but she's definitely not the only one that Zuko opened up to. She's technically not the first person to give Zuko a chance, but Aang was the one who did it right after he was freed by Zuko (who was disguised as the Blue Spirit).

"Toko = Zutara = Zukka = just about any fan pairing/OT100 involving Zuko".

I don't entirely agree with this. For context, a user by the name of 'atla-recluse' posted this in regard to Zuko shipping:

"Toph, who actually wanted to go on one just to hang out with him. Toph, who tried to speak to him about her personal struggles (as they walked together in search of Aang). The sort of thing an actually compassionate and reflective boy would have at least tried to sympathize with, even if only briefly. Instead, he immediately shuts her down. Seems he didn’t have a second to waste on some dumb little girl, right? This same girl who would later on take moments out of her time to sit down with him and comfort him (The Ember Island Players). Someone’s always there when he wants support. An emotionally volatile 12 - 13 year-old comforting an even more emotionally volatile 16 - 17 year-old. Not a good look. And yet…Toko = Zutara = Zukka = just about any fan pairing/OT100 involving Zuko. And the reasons why they’re shipped always seem to be the same, save one little difference here and there. It’s always about pleasing Zuko and his you-know-what. Pardon the innuendo and my mood."

I agree that Zuko was kind of a jerk to Toph with how he dismissed her, even though he dumped his emotions out and let her give some reassurance. Zuko went on a journey to free Hadoka from prison with Sokka, and Zuko went on a journey to give Katara closure for the fucker that murdered her mother. Although Zuko has streaks of selfishness in his good deeds, it should still be noted that he does care enough about Sokka and Katara to help them in regard to their families. Meanwhile, Zuko factually never even said Toph's name during the entire show's runtime. I'm not saying that Zutara is a perfect ship, but I am saying that it IS different than Toko.

The Final Point to mention: They just ain't into each other".

And although I like checking out Zutara fics and seeing what creative combinations the Zutarans had to bring for over ten years, I still don't truly ship Katara and Zuko because they're just not into each other. Look at the Ember Island play scene that depicted Katara and Zuko being secret lovers in an affair. They literally cringed away from each other. They didn't blush or smile, they CRINGED.

So far, those are my takes on this apparent "war" with the Zutara shipping. So here's where I casually call up hardcore Zutarans to ask a genuine and polite question: what is your response to these arguments against Zutara? Will you still ship them after these arguments? I would really like to know your perspectives, and to see if my mind can change. I don't hate Zutara, though I'm not sure if I ship Zuko and Katara either. Again, that's my actual take, and I would super like to read what Zutarans would like to say about all this.

[a-god-in-ruins-rises]

Hello. I'm not American, but I followed the last election pretty closely, and it raised a lot of questions for me. I was hoping you could share your perspective on a few things. For example, why does American politics seem so focused on personality and spectacle rather than actual policy? Is this because of a broken system that can't foster meaningful dialogue, or does the focus on "character" reflect a deeper cultural preference for spectacle over substance?

lmaooooo. i assume you are a european? because this ask reeks of european smugness. but it's fine. it's an interesting question and i'm happy to share my thoughts. and boy, do i have a lot of thoughts.

tl;dr: why? because americans are based.

"keep reading" at your own risk (it's gonna be long)....

first of all, i don't know how other countries run their democracies. so it seems like you're suggesting that your country is different from america. that y'all focus more on policy rather than "spectacle". i am skeptical of this claim but for the sake of this discussion, i'll grant it and assume it's accurate. so you come from a policy-heavy democracy. okay. this just further confirms to me that you're a european.

okay. so you live in a country full of nerds and policy wonks. good for you.

here in america? we are men. we are loved by the gods. and we are alive. we like to kill and we like to fuck. there is still red-hot blood in our veins! it's called the political arena for a reason. like the colosseum. arena means "place of sand," because gladiatorial arenas were covered in sand to soak up blood. american democracy isn't some mundane policy debate. boring, lame, and soulless.

no, american democracy is spirited and mythic. it is a place where men do (political) combat. a test of wills and destiny as much as skill. where not just survival is at stake, but everlasting glory too. the (political) arena is a sacred stage. a hallowed ground upon which the fates of men and nations are decided. you cannot even begin to comprehend the power of the american people. count yourself lucky to be able to bear witness to the divine struggle.

yes, yes. it's spectacle. it's theater. it's performance. so what? this is all to say that it is an art form. american politics is politics as art. fuck your spreadsheets. we're mythmaking here! and here, in the land of heroes, the lines between myth and reality are blurred. american politicians aren't policy wonks here to give the people policy briefs. no, they are larger-than-life symbols that represent the very complex and tangled psyche of the american people. they are vessels through which the people's hopes and fears can be expressed. they are an embodiment of the collective soul of the nation at a particular time.

and this is why i take some issue with the idea of it being "spectacle" because the term implies that the people are just passive observers but i don't agree. the people are active participants and co-creators in this mythmaking. casting votes, doing activism, attending town hall meetings, writing legislators, donating, volunteering, etc. these are all deeply engrained in the american psyche. and when they vote they're not just doing some rationalistic cost-benefit analysis of the policies. they are curating a particular national character, an emblem of their vision of what america is or should be. in this way it is literally collaborative mythmaking.

and a great people (like we americans) admire greatness. and so it's not enough for a person to have good policy. they need to be great and inspiring. policy isn't going to get people fired up. but a great leader will. he will ignite, move, and seduce the people's imagination. and truly, i think this is part of what makes america so great.

yes, policy is important. but it's not the most important thing. policy doesn’t make the hair on your arms stand up, doesn’t fill a stadium, doesn’t pull people out of their beds and into the fire. americans understand this. we the people are the directors casting the symbolic figures who will stand at the heart of america’s ever-unfolding story, in a way that is raw and passionately human. american democracy is a never-ending collaborative ritual of becoming.

you want to paint it as something shallow but it's actually the opposite. it's as deep as you can get. it's primal. it's reaching into the depths of the human soul. you call it a spectacle; i call it a mystery play. a dramatic unfolding of archetypes and primal forces, a cosmic pageant where the ideals of freedom, justice, fear, and power are constantly manifesting, clashing, and transforming.

and this isn't to say that every american politician is great, obviously. or that every election will present us with great politicians. it is a sliding scale and there are obviously lulls and low points. but honestly, even at its "worst" it still manages to be very sacral. i mean, just look at kamala. she was a deeply unpopular nobody, painfully banal and unimpressive, and yet she was still elevated to some kind of notability by the dems' party apparatus (again, pageantry and theater is a key part of this) and you had ordinary citizens who really loved and believed in her. i've seen videos of young women approaching her and sobbing with a mix of fear and hope. kamala, like many politicians, was a mask. a ceremonial persona that channels a force larger than themselves. each political figure is a vehicle for the expression of the archetypes lurking within the public psyche.

the "spectacle" of american democracy, then, is not shallow or trivial but profoundly alchemical: a process through which the invisible forces and latent desires of society become visible, embodied, personal. every campaign, every rally, every soundbite is an incantation in this larger ritual, a symbolic offering that speaks to the fears, the aspirations, and the boundless imagination of the public.

and even the controversies and scandals should be thought of in this context. not as distractions from governance but as necessary rites of purification and trial. the political arena is where these figures are tested; subjected to ritual humiliation or exaltation, challenged to expose themselves and submit to judgment by the people.

ours isn't a democracy of facts and figures but myth and memory. like i said earlier, it's politics as art. and art is about redemption. american democracy is about the peoples' need to see itself reflected and redeemed. like in any play.

our leaders aren’t simply decision-makers (though they are certainly that too)—they’re dream-bearers, keepers of the national spirit, actors summoned to embody what is essential, unspoken, even taboo. they’re the protagonists of a public dreamscape where american ideals aren’t just principles but living gods, bending and twisting to reflect the collective will of the people in real-time.

and so this isn’t just a political process. it’s a public initiation, a ritual that binds the people not through rational calculation but through shared mythmaking. policy might structure society, but it’s this ritual of personality, this living myth, that keeps the american spirit alive, forever restless, forever reinventing itself on the sacred stage.

and i think this captures the original, ancient, most authentic sense of democracy. i can't imagine ancient greek, roman, or even germanic leaders going around giving policy briefs. no. they were men of charisma and vision, capable of inspiring and igniting the people. they made promises, sure. "i promise i'll get you, my soldiers, land." but this is different to having a strict policy regime. a promise is so much nobler and sacred. maybe they didn't have all the details of how they'd achieve it figured out. but they made the promise. and there's the expectation they'd keep it. if they didn't, they were doomed. and even their rhetoric was more like a magical spell than rationalistic discourse. i think that's what y'all are missing. the art of rhetoric. appealing to reason is important, but it's only one part.

i think you policy wonk types are too logos-brained. not enough ethos or pathos. and i think america has all three in spades. indeed, i kinda take umbrage with this idea that americans somehow don't care about policy just because it isn't the only thing we're preoccupied with. because if you look at the world, america seems to have a pretty excellent track record. our policies and our institutions have turned our country from a colonial backwater into a global hegemon in a couple centuries.

and that's the other thing. our leaders aren't obsessed with policy, sure. but they do make promises. and yeah many promises are broken. but others are not. but that's all part of the drama. promises made, promises kept, promises broken. it isn't some empty spectacle like you're suggesting. just because americans aren't obsessed with policy like you doesn't mean we don't care about policy at all. we just approach it from a different angle. these promises are sacred to us. the "spectacle" can't just be empty. it has to be meaningful. there has to be something tangible/substantial.

american's aren't just tuning in for the show. they expect very real transformation and change, obviously. it's not always presented in some rigid policy brief, but still. the expectation is there. the promises represent a broader vision. the details are less important. and the execution of this vision is dependent on the greatness of the leader. a great leader will make these promises and present a vision to the people and then carry it out. and they'll make whatever policy changes they need to do so, most of the time. in this way, great leaders are like alchemists who can turn abstract policy into something material, translating the mythic into the real. it gives weight and purpose to the "spectacle".

so yeah i reject this idea that americans don't care about policy. i think we do just in a different, more holistic way than you do.

yes we americans elect our president in a fashion similar to my ancient german ancestors elected their kings; in roaring assemblies of freemen possessed by frenzy joined together through a moment of communion and electing our leader by acclamation; bestowing upon him the responsibility of guarding and guiding the wyrd (fate) of our people. i feel no shame about embracing this ancient spirit of democracy, when our leaders were more than mere soulless administrative policy-makers.

last thing i'll say. american democracy, as mentioned earlier, is a ritual of becoming. because america itself is a nation of becoming. it is not a calculation. it is a movement. from the very moment of our birth america has been defined by dreaming and yearning and creating. a nation of possibility and boundless potential. always asking "what if?" and achieving the impossible. the american ideal of freedom, of freedom of expression, is so deeply romantic. it cannot be understood rationally. we americans have a promethean fire in us. insert "you wouldn't get it" meme.

america is a land of new beginnings, where reason, society, and even government are bent and shaped by human passion, a place where history can be remade because the people are driven by ideals rather than chains of tradition.

i mean, look at our founding document. the declaration of independence. it's a poetic manifesto more than anything else. a titanic declaration of defiance and the promise of a new vision of a new world. and my great-spirited ancestors were willing to die for this. and you're really surprised that americans today are a people driven by passion and heroic ideals and myths?

we are americans. we are men. we still have red-hot blood in our veins and fire in our hearts and i won't apologize for it!

[disregardcanon]

thinking about a npmd characters yellowjackets au and oh boy it's fun

okay so the premise is, the hatchetfield high school nighthawk football team is going to nationals. i'm pretty sure that doesn't exist for american high school football but we're suspending disbelief.

solomon lauter is trying to build up goodwill with the community for this election cycle, so not only does he charter a private plane for the football team, he makes his daughter go with. HE doesn't have time to go to seattle and it's not like most people will see him there anyway, but if he puts his daughter on the plane with them and says oh look my daughter is so kind and supportive! she's taking time away from HER own schoolwork and HER own life to support our fighting nighthawks! what a kind and involved citizen she is!

and then of course he pressures her teachers to just. let her off the hook for activities in classes that week. because she's such a kiiinnnddd person who's supporting the football team.

richie, of course, is essential for an excursion such as this. he's zeke the fighting nighthawk! he's on that plane. ruth has some overlap with misty quigley that i find interesting, so we're making her the equipment manager. this is half to get her on the plane and half because i think she'd use that as an excuse to be a pervert. like oooohhh i'm so sorry! i didn't think there would be boys CHANGING in here right now! myyyy mistake.

max and the football team and brenda and the cheer squad are all there. now however do we get our dearest spankoffski on that plane? (ruth says that she needs help with equipment management duties and pete's already the salutorian of the class... so she's able to sell him just missing this second to last week of school alright to the teachers. he doesn't really WANT to, but steph, who he's been bonding with since she got him to help her cheat and then actually helped her study... asks him to. because she says she's going to be bored out of her mind without someone to hang out with... and he's only HUMAN, okay?)

now how do we get grace temperance chastity on a plane full of horny teenagers for an activity that she doesn't do? why making her the president of the FCA (fellowship of christian athletes) of course! she is the self-assigned chaperone of such an important and potentially very horny and drug-ridden activity in such a den of sin (seattle). SHE is the only thing standing between the students of hatchetfield high and total anarchy. as valedictorian (peter, if you just applied yourself and maybe went to chuuurrrcchhh you might have beaten me! grace will you just shut up-) she is not worried about her grades in this penultimate week of school. oh BOY was she wrong.

they of course crash in the canadian rockies. the coaches die, and we're left with absolute fucking anarchy. everyone save our favorite quintet listen to max for awhile as he dictates the ways that heeee, max jagerman, think things should be run. it's bad! it doesn't work! they're gonna fucking die!!!!!!!

jagerman is more worried about how to keep his power and where steph keeps disappearing to than figuring out how to stay alive in case of... not getting rescued.

ruth has GAD and is just freaking the fuck out in the corner, richie is doing the same, and pete is trying to figure out. how the fuck to survive in case of no rescue coming. steph's on team I Think We Should Prepare, Jesus Christ! and grace enjoys survival situations so she's over here. she also thinks that the act of god might be that they're stuck out here and have to build a new jerusalem (tehehe)

the combined powers of steph's charisma and kindness, pete's problem-solving, and grace's intensity and sureness in herself, they convince the rest of the group that they found a safer spot... a lake, where they might find water and food and not die here by the plane while waiting for a rescue that might not come.

the rest of the group listens, showing the first crack in max jagerman's power, and he has a very ugly blowup but eventually follows.

he IS going to die out there. he IS going to be the first to die out there. and they are going to eat him :) but it's also max jagerman who's in the narrative role of jackie. so he's gonna haunt this fucking narrative! OHHHHH YEAAAAAAHHHHHHH

other tidbits: max deciding to for real pursue grace is mainly about trying to break her power base because he's pissed she's the one everyone's listening to now, but he also... does think that's hot. :3

grace IS going full girl-prophet. lottie tempered her girl-prophet ways in season 2 because she realized that things were going wrong... grace thinks she's god's anointed so she is not going to do that. not at all.

stephanie HAS got a gun. a hunting she will go. a hunting she will take pete. (we're out here starving in the woods and you think that pete and i shouldn't... sleep together? with fucking CONDOMS!?!?! what is your prOBLEM? he's a loser and you're COOL! we're not in fucking high school, max! grow! up!) they're getting some of that Narrative Conflict With The Superstitions that defines natalie's character.

ruth WOULD find the porno mags she WOULD show everyone and when grace tries to confiscate them for Jesus Reasons ruth would find one to squirrel away just for herself. i am also assigning ruth butcher because i think she could handle the guts, and also.. i'm sorry the idea of ruth throwing girls' nights with jagerman's corpse in the freezing cold meat shed just works in my brain.

i'm gonna give richie van's How Do We Make Sense of All These Times I Almost Died and this ABSOLUTE Bullshit!??!! plot line, along with assigning him group morale and Person Who Tells the Stories.

when it gets to the card pull grace WILL be rigging it to get rid of "dirty dudes". jason gets got first. and grace keeps giving lautski and ruth cryptic warnings about cleaning up their sexual act or else and they're just like hahaha i'm in danger...

somehow grace thinks that this is all compatible with her christianity! i love her <3

[xbruised-peachx]

since you are staring to like fender do you have any headcanons for him 👀

SO, the problem I'm having is I actually know very little about Hungary, so often with my headcanons, I try to also make them accurate for someone who is actually that nationality. Unfortunately I don't know anyone from Hungary to ask either so unlike Gromsko, mine are gonna probably have some inaccuracies and I do apologize and they may seem a lil standard but, I'll give em a shot bc there is so lil content abt Fender anyway!

Fender Headcanons

Tags: none actually! these are just general headcanons that could be applied anywhere :)

Let's start with one that's basically canon you can't convince me otherwise; His call sign is Fender, the guitar brand, he has multiple lines referring to music ("Now we're jamming!" "Shows over!" "Get the fuck off my stage..." "Very rock and roll 🤔" "Let's get the band together!" etc.), and his voice actor can sing really well. He is definitely a musician of some sort and strikes me as a metal head for sure. Some of his favorites are System of a Down, Slayer, and Avenged Sevenfold.

His bio states he was father was a CIA op and mother was a "guerrilla revolutionary" in communist Budapest. Communism ended in Hungary around end of 1989, so at the youngest, he's 33 since the game takes place at the end of 2022.

With his father dying when he was young, he's definitely a mama's boy. However he also give off eldest sibling energy so I think he has a few younger half-siblings. He also has daddy issues, sorry that's canon.

He is definitely a gym rat with that gym skin he got April. But I want to combine it with the Mtn. Dew skin because he's gremlin coded and yeah no, he's combined his pre-workout powder with Mtn Dew and swears he saw God while using a stair climber.

He's had his tooth gap since his adult teeth first started coming in, but he absolutely despised the dentist. Being his mom's first child, and just generally not growing up in the most wealthy household, he managed to convince her he didn't really need an orthodontist or braces. Hence, his cute lil smile he has now.

In general, he's very confident in his abilities, a little abrasive but charming in his own way. He will always remain friendly at first until wronged. He got bullied as a kid so he does have his guard up and it takes a bit to truly gain his trust. He also is a bit hot headed and will stay angry for quite a few hours.

He will often use the fact he's half American as a joke... a lot. He says that's why he loves Mtn Dew, why he learned English so early in his life despite his dad already being gone, and that he definitely got his love for explosives from his dad's side of the family.

He's not super patriotic though for Hungary. He likes his home country but doesn't quite like speaking Hungarian around the others in Kortac knowing they won't understand him. Only rarely will they catch him talking under his breath to himself or when he's startled in battle (example, "VIGYÁZZ!").

He will however, cuss someone out in his language. There are no holes barred there, he will say some the most jaw dropping shit if they knew what he was saying. This often leads to him laughing mid-cuss out as they look to him incredibly confused.

[qedmirage]

As most of my international followers know here in the US we're having a presidential election this year. Well, that means each major party has to select their candidate, and the process for that has been going on for a while now. See, in the US, state-level parties have a lot of say in how they select candidates, so they randomly jockey for more important slots than each other, and this is why the party elections for their candidate take months and not, like, a week. Well for the past several months, in the lead up to actual voting, we've been obligated to pretend that several people with a snowball's chance in hell were serious candidates to control the world's [EDIT: second-] largest nuclear arsenal. I want to briefly commemorate/memorialize one of those candidacies, that of Ron DeSantis of florida.

See just a few days ago we had the iowa caucuses, a silly way to select presidential candidates that is ALSO unrepresentative of who the final nominee will be, as the winner secures an objectively tiny amount of points (called 'delegates') towards gaining a party's nomination and the system is designed to make it impossible for introverts to participate. You get like a tiny sliver of a party's membership voting in caucuses and it's weighted to favor the freaks and fanatics. And yet that simple, first contest, was enough to cause all but two of the field of GOP candidates to give up and go home. Because throughout the pre-pre-election season they would give fawning, obsequious praise to Donald Trump - the best president since Washington, possibly even better - and then be asked: "Isn't he also running for president? Why should people vote for you over him, if they like Trump?" to which the answer would be some vague mumbling about his legal challenges or age or how statistically most of the country wants to murder him with knives. (The notable exception here is wannabee mafioso Chris Christie, who at least does not forgive trying to kill him). Anyways, in final results Trump got 20 points, Ron DeSantis got 9, Nikki Haley got 8, and 4chan shitposter Vivek Ramaswamy got 3. Of those, only Trump and Nikki Haley didn't immediately give up. So anyways. Ron DeSantis. Actually presently a governor of a major state, and Florida at that - one which has shifted from 'swing' to 'republican' over his tenure. You could be forgiven for thinking he's a skilled politician. And yet. He repeatedly promised that his first day in office would start with war with mexico, which he never described in those terms. Rather he'd just

blockade mexican ports

shoot mexican nationals on the southern border without a trial ('people who have backpacks', apparently)

Send US military forces into mexico to kill more mexican citizens without trial

Cool. Normal. We're allies with that country, you know? He'd say such policies were informed by his military service as a lawyer in Iraq and then (he does not mention this part) Guantanomo Bay. Yeah, I bet they are. Though, for some reason, he always leaves off the "as a lawyer" part. DeSantis's team also produced some of the most deranged and openly fascist ads of a major candidate. See, the DeSantis campaign was oriented around "the war on woke", his efforts to use state power to roll back civil rights in general, progressives existing in government, and the rights of LGBT people in particular. Already cloaked in the language of online reactionaries it was always gonna attract freaks, and as a result, the ads made by younger staffers (released, not by the official campaign, but to pro-DeSantis meme accounts secretly run by his staffers) are totally deranged. Here's one of them; I'm going to warn you, it's intensely homophobic, to the point that a republican presidential candidate had to apologize for the homophobia.:

crazy ass moments in american politics on X: "The Ron DeSantis campaign team post a Trump attack ad feat. phonk. (2023) https://t.co/cwaWnZInG7" / X (twitter.com)

For those who don't wish to watch such things, the core thesis of the ad is that the republican party under Trump was captured by and coddled LGBT people, and DeSantis will restore strong masculinity and crush LGBT americans. DeSantis is paralleled to noted straight Achilles, those sigma chad memes, and fictional murderer Patrick Bateman, all while heavy bass music plays. My personal favorite stills:

Again, these are from an ad for a guy who quit after literally the first contest. Truly a fighter.

But even that pales in comparison to the "running up that hill" ad. That one is one of the most straightforwardly fascist pieces of advertising a modern american politician has made. While perhaps less directly offensive, viewer be warned, this is nazi shit: Luke Thompson on X: "The @desantiscams account just deleted this video after at least one campaign staffer RT'd it. I wonder if this was also made in-house. https://t.co/JA1D9qqONF" / X (twitter.com) (It was, in fact, made in-house).

The esoteric nazi symbolism did not go unnoticed. Nor the fact that it ends on DeSantis's paramilitary "florida guard" (not the national guard!) marching forward into a bright dawn while he looks down approvingly. The aide who made that video was fired, but it's no wonder he felt at home; DeSantis's whole appeal is about threatening to use extralegal power against conservatism's enemies. He tried to revoke Disney's special tax statuses based purely on an extremely beige statement in support of LGBT rights they issued, and again, established a paramilitary force under his command. There are far more examples than those two. Not a 'normal' politician. Aside from setting millions of dollars of republican donor money on fire, DeSantis's campaign leaves behind a legacy of the various 'posting is life' type laws he enacted in Florida to raise his public profile. These include a raft of laws that target and victimize LGBT americans: [Thread of several such stories, reported in major outlets]

And he was also a noted figure in the conservative turn against COVID precautions, defenses, and vaccinations. While we'll never know such things to precision, Florida's COVID deaths record was considerably worse than many other states, despite its wealth and good climate. They chose not to pursue safer methods so as to buoy DeSantis's future presidential ambitions, now dead in the street. Like most failed presidential primary candidates he will probably not have a long future in national politics; DeSantis is a weirdo who eats pudding with his bare fingers, he's profoundly uncharismatic, and he's fought against his team's de facto leader. But before it's all consigned to dust of history, I'd just like to take a moment to remember all the real people who have suffered for his campaign, and for what? So he can make a 72 second ad with him shooting lightning from his eyes, get 21% of the vote in Iowa, and give up after 8 days.

A statesman for the ages, truly.

[surejess]

i. the man who laughs (1928), dir. paul leni // ii. "fear and loathing" - marina // iii. robert bloch

( margot robbie, 34, cis woman, she/her ) — Look who it is! If you take a look at our database, you’ll find that JESSICA "JESS" TURNER is a COAL MINER & PRISONER that works in SECTOR 8. According to the file, they’re a mutant with the power of FUN LORD (+ CLOWN PHYSIOLOGY). That must be why they’re GREGARIOUS and NONSENSICAL. If you ask me, they remind me of unearned laughter over a killing joke, a permanent stepford smile, mars opportunity’s last message. They are affiliated with NOBODY.

QUICK FACTS:

full name: jessica "jess" turner

date of birth: february 24th, 2140

zodiac big three: pisces sun, sagittarius moon, gemini rising

gender & pronouns: cis woman & she/her

sexual + romantic orientation: demisexual + biromantic

ethnicity: white

nationality: some settlement where northeast usa once was -ian 

religion: "there's no point in religion because we're all being controlled in a piece of fiction anyway :-)", raised very loosely practicing christian (protestant, not sexy catholic)

languages spoken: english (5)

enneagram: 7w6

mbti: enfx

temperament: sanguine-melancholic

alignment: chaotic neutral

ability: fun lord ( + clown physiology )

affiliation: n/a

task: mutation breakdown

BACKSTORY

triggers: murder

The second child of Bernice and Joseph Turner, the only hint they were given when she was first born was the joyous laughter the doctor and nurses offered upon delivering her. Outside of that, despite both Bernice and Joseph being low-level mutants, no mutation red flags shot up... at first.

Her first hairs were cotton-candy colored, though. One iris that had looked blue in the delivery room and nursery ward was actually... pink.

Uh. this was added later in. so this breaks the flow. but, somewhere along the way (jess was probs, like. eight. idk.), the Turners left the settlement in what was once called the 'northeast' by people who were once called '(us)americans' for sol city. we're gonna say there was some opportunity in sol city because this is honestly just so i can keep the silly goofy dialect i've been using for her since she was birthed. anyway:

As she grew, she didn't look far too different from her peers -- not enough for her to get singled out, at least. The extra colors in her hair were natural, but could be passed off as dye ( or some Claire's clip-ins (although I've got a feeling Claire's doesn't exist anymore :( ) ) and the one pink iris was easy to miss. That built-in makeup? Oh, she just got into her mom's makeup... every day, apparently.

Where she drastically differed, however, was in the way she thought. 1+1=fish was a completely true statement. 1+1=2? Who says!?

That said, it was largely harmless. She didn't fully understand when someone was making fun of her -- they were just being silly! -- and she'd never had the capability to hurt anyone with her mutation. As far as she and her parents could tell, all she could do was clowny things without needing the props on hand!

-> Oh, how silly they were to think that!

When Jess was 15, new things began manifesting. It was still mostly harmless, but... definitely more powerful than just being able to make a card appear out of nowhere. It started with a mimed action turning into said action actually being put into effect (for example, finger guns actually firing (invisible) bullets) and ended in murder. What a way to go, right?

See, as these more extreme powers began manifesting, Jess started to grow this sneaking suspicion that... she wasn't in charge of her own life. Someone was writing the plot of it for her, someone was determining her actions -- and it wasn't some god or higher-being... she was a character in someone's story.

Well, that obviously sounded insane to everyone. But she knew it! And there were so many things she couldn't have known unless she were being controlled by someone who did! But, try as she might, no one bought into it.

She, however, received confirmation when the creator finally talked back. She had an audience to entertain -- and, as a clown, that was what she was best at! -- and she had a story her creator wouldn't let her slip away from. This wasn't some kind of Oedipus Rex pondering fate and free-will -- nope! She had no free-will! And knowing that -- knowing that -- found her in some of the finest (sarcasm detected) psych wards the settlement had to offer! More than once! And she couldn't do anything to stop that. As long as the creator kept her talking about it, as long as the creator kept her parents (and others) from believing her, the more she'd be shut away. There was no free-will!

-> Oh, but if only she didn't still have the illusion!

Her creator told her the condition under which she'd be granted free-will -- Jess knew it would have long-term ramifications, but whatever it took to make her life her own...

On December 25th, 2161, Bernice and Joseph Turner were found dead and mangled in their living room. Bernice's intestines had replaced the lights that were strung up on the tree, Joseph's head had replaced the star on top. Slices of their skin had been carved into the shape of gingerbread men. Bernice's head was on a silver platter, not unlike a Christmas ham. In the backyard, the inflatable snowman's arms had been replaced by Joseph's. Both of their hearts were hanging from the tree. And the person who had created this grotesque scenery had been the one to call it in, sitting on the front porch step.

-> Damn, May. That was such a mean prank.

Between how gruesome the murder was and Jess's pleas -- technically speaking, it was her, but on a grand scheme, it was her creator! It was the only way she would be free! And if her parents were already being controlled by the creator... -- she was first sent to a fine psych ward, completely separate from all other patients, before being transferred to the penitentiary two years later when she stopped babbling about her creator. She knew the writer was still there -- hell, there were times that she still communicated! -- but she also knew that there was no point in continuing to beg the nurses and doctors and guards to believe her! (Especially if the creator was controlling the story, in which case it wasn't even her choice!)

Although she did not fully identify, so to speak, with many of the inmates in the penitentiary, it was nice to have people to talk to again -- people who weren't the creator. Were some of them murderous freaks? Yeah! But so was she! And they were probably being controlled, too, so who could really blame them? It's really not their fault if the creators want to get a lil fucked up! Where was their jail time?

The mines were... acceptable. Between her regular abilities and developing kinship with the creator, passing the time while chipping away at the coal wasn't quite as miserable as it could've been. If nothing else, she wasn't gonna die (at least, that's what she was led to believe... but, man, she'd been punk'd so bad in the past!).

TIMELINE

BORN -- and everyone laughed! seriously, it's not r/ThatHappened, everyone really did laugh! Despite being the daughter of two low-level mutants, that was the only hint they had regarding her status.

TODDLER AGES, IDK -- Well... her first hairs were cotton-candy colored, one iris seemed to turn pink, it looked like she always had makeup on... It wasn't exactly glaring, what compared to some other mutants, but it was clear enough to her parents that Jess would not grow up as a human. Further solidified when cards and balloons would appear out of nowhere.

AGE 8: The Turners receive... some opportunity in Sol City, idk. They leave a settlement in what was once called the 'northeast' of '(us)america'. Okay, back to the story:

KID AGES, IDK -- Jess was pretty sure she was best friends with everyone, but everyone else was pretty sure she thought 1+1=fish (which, to be fair, she did). Her mind very clearly did not mesh well with that of the average kid, even the most creative ones out there! The occasional confusion she'd accidentally induce or the occasional balloon... that was actually a bomb that she'd accidentally create... see, that didn't quite help her case! She was friendly enough, but wow... what the fuck...

EARLY ADOLESCENCE / EARLY TEENS -- Along with puberty came the development of more powers -- or maybe they were always there and she'd just now noticed, she wasn't quite sure, but they were definitely more powerful than her earlier arsenal. And everything only grew stronger and more intense...

AGE 16 -- She grew a sneaking suspicion that she wasn't in charge of her life. Someone else was controlling it... There were so many things that couldn't be explained any other way (like certain memories or certain knowledge -- things she wouldn't have or know if it weren't for some outside force)... and she was growing stronger... But she, of course, was written off as silly goofy whenever she'd discuss it.

FURTHER MID-TEENS -- As suspicion grew stronger and she began receiving harder forms of confirmation, she became even more adamant! What to the point that her parents sent her... away more than a few times. (On that topic, one thing she remembered was getting a lobotomy... only that never happened... but it did happen... but it never did... but it did... but it didn't... etc etc.) Of course, she was never the most popular kid in school, but those claims and those little trips really didn't do her any favors.

AGE 21 -- There were periods she'd go, completely dropping the claims (even if she still thoroughly believed them)... but she'd always go back around to it. She wasn't in control of her life!? Well, that meant someone else was! And that that person was the one who decided she got to know she wasn't in control of her life! And, in turn, that that person was the one who decided she'd hate that! Geez, what a dick! Oh, but she fell for it! She fell for it when the creator said she could have free-will! All she had to do was go kill her parents in an extremely grisly fashion. (Listen, even if she and her parents were no longer exactly on speaking terms, she didn't want them dead! But there were some good points the creator brought up -- who did Jess think was controlling them? Who was to say her parents even had any feelings after all? Who was to say they weren't just a way to create a story for her?) She called the cops on December 25th, 2161 to witness her horrific Christmas-themed massacre. Between the grotesque nature and her outlandish claims, she was sent to the more... criminal and isolated section of the psych ward for two years.

AGE 23 -- She was transferred from the Hannibal Lecter-esque psych ward section to the penitentiary. She hadn't rambled about the creator in a while -- she hadn't rambled much at all! Despite being around some folks who were murderers for funzies, it was nice to be able to talk to people again! And, like, she wasn't wholly down with her own choice because, like... it wasn't her choice! So who even was to say that it was those folks' choices anyway? I mean, her creator had basically confirmed that most people around her -- if not all! -- were just as controlled as she was!

AGE 25 -- Finally deemed fit to go to work for the first time since she was 21, she was sent straight to the coal mines to be good ol' Miner 49er! It was dull and dangerous and physically taxing... but she had her silly powers and the creator to keep her company. She was growing friendlier with the creator, after all, and the creator had said that there was no danger to her in the mines! (Of course, she'd been the victim of a really mean prank before, but...)

AGE 34 -- Still trying to maintain a good relationship with the creator while not talking about her as much around other people! Kinda getting out of that obsessive territory and having to actually feel the guilt of killing her parents sucks though :\ and handling organs was, like... damn, did she really bake their skin :\ she'd like to submit her murder to the damned for a ranking (ignoring the call to the cops -- she thought she was gonna be free if she did that! and also ignoring the lingering guilt -- see, it was a complicated relationship...)

HEADCANONS

Her version of reality can now be showcased by Lily Allen’s ‘LDN’ MV…

Very important image of 5'01 Jess in the psych ward(s)

The creator now just fucks around and tells her about her silly goofy powers in the mines. But the creator holds some cards to her chest! Jess has to discover those by herself!

Her biggest flaw is thinking she has such an immaculate aura that any animal, no matter how deadly, would become her best friend. Might get eaten by a polar bear one day, idk.

Clowns like Ronald McDonald (I doubt he still exists in this world) perpetuate unrealistic beauty standards for clowns everywhere!

Dreams of being able to be a comedian in Sector 9 one day <3 She has a natural gift for comedy! And when people aren't laughing naturally... fuck it, clown with "laughter inducement"!

Damn... she's actually having to feel the guilt of that gruesome murder now though... damn girl...

(To note: she is not ACTUALLY going to talk about us (<3) as much as this intro makes it seem, it's just an important part for Jess 3.0!)

CONNECTION IDEAS

her older sibling. her brutally slaughtering their parents cld be so very juicy!

a childhood friend. but. like. one (1). because she was too silly goofy for this world.

cellmate. (idk i think it would be funny if she were cellmates with someone really tough with a really cynical outlook and she's there like "it's okay we're all being controlled anyway! don't worry about not succeeding in your assassination attempt on a councilman that's on your creator :\")

someone who BELIEVES her silly ravings regarding the fourth wall

idk i clearly like vibing

[asbestos4president]

Hamuel Burger Episode 1 Transcript

Episode title: Keep Pushing, Abraham!

[Sound of a UFO landing. Interior spaceship noises] Asbestos … Thanks for the donations. Okay, so we've just touched down in Grace, Idaho, the capital city of the planet Earth, so I'll be stepping out shortly to take my first look. For those of you who are new to the stream, I'm doing this blind, I haven't looked anything up about Earth before coming here, so no spoilers, please. Okay, so, before we leave the shuttle, I want to establish some ground rules. First, like I already said, no spoilers. Seriously. Second, no embarrassing me in front of any of the Earth inhabitants. And third, and this is the most important-

TTS voice If you're going into this blind, how do you know that Grace is the capital city? Cheater.

Asbestos Look, it's just common knowledge. The national animal of earth is the mongoose, the national food of the earth is the deathcap mushroom, and the capital city of the earth is a sweet little place named Grace, Idaho, notable for its Mormons, its potatoes, and its vast intergalactic geopolitical importance. 

TTSYou literally just quoted that straight off the page for Idaho on the Earth fan wiki.

Asbestos Did not! 

TTS Did too!

Asbestos Did not! 

TTS Did too! 

Asbestos Yeah, well, you literally just paid me five American dollars to be able to send that message, and if my information is up to date, that is enough to purchase at least one American hot dog. You know, the national hound of the planet Earth? Which I will ride into battle against my enemies and laugh as it mauls them to death. 

TTS Did too! 

Asbestos

 Okay, chat, you have officially lost text to speech privileges for the next Earth minute, which reliable sources inform me is a really long time. Now, it's important to make a good first impression, so I'm just going to make sure my hair looks okay and my belly button looks convincingly real before I- 

[Knocking on metal]

[Short silence]

Asbestos Sorry, I thought I heard something. Probably just the potatoes snoring. It's actually quite late in earth time, and potatoes like to get to bed early because- 

[Knocking again]

Asbestos (whisper) Chat. Chat, I think there's something at the door. Should I-

TTS Hello potentially violent stranger, please come in and strangle me to death!

[Spaceship door opening noise]

Asbestos (whisper, directed to chat) I'm going to actually kill you.

Ham Please don't kill me! I'm left-handed and I have asthma and my Mum says I can't go around getting killed or the neighbours will think we're uncivilised! 

Asbestos Oh my god, this is not a drill. Are you guys seeing this? I didn't think I was going to be nervous, but I'm actually super nervous. What should I say?  Um, hi, Mr. President! Wow, you're way shorter without the hat. 

Ham What? 

Asbestos Do you take constructive criticism? Because honestly, I think you should have kept the beard. The clean shaven look does not suit you.

Ham What???

Asbestos Well, I guess it doesn't matter because I'm going to kill you in a few seconds anyway. Any last words?

Ham This is a sentence I never expected to say, but I think you've mistaken me for Abraham Lincoln, and I'm not sure whether to find that gender-affirming.

Asbestos See, I just don't think that's gonna sell any tabloids. Do you want to pick something catchier? Something with a bit more oomf, maybe? Like, "I've Abrahad it with this life!" 

Eh, we can workshop it.

[Beat of silence]

Wait, what? 

Ham Abraham Lincoln died, like, at least 3 years ago. If you're looking for the president,  it's definitely not him, and it's definitely not me either, and you're definitely not going to find him in a potato field in Idaho. Please put the gun down.

Asbestos Oh! My mistake. I know this one. It's, uh… It's Ben Jammin' Franklin now, right?

Ham Uh, not particularly, no. Look, I just came to tell you to get off our farm or at least turn those big blinking lights off because it's 9PM and some of us are trying to sleep. You really need to leave before my mum finds out you're a UFO.  

Asbestos Man, this is embarrassing. Okay. Okay! Just point me in the direction of the president's house and I'll be on my way. 

Ham I think Washington is, like, South, sort of? Somewhere near Florida? Actually, let me look it up.

[Low pitched noise like a foghorn. This is Ham's mum's voice]

Ham Gee willikers. It's okay mum, the tractor is just leaving!

[Ham's mum]

Ham Not everything is an alien, okay? Sheesh.

[Ham's mum]

We've actually had five spaceships landing here in the past week, but she doesn't need to know that. I've managed to convince her that they're just genetically modified cows. Now go!

Asbestos I'm going, I'm going. I thought Earth would be more welcoming than this. 

Ham You tried to kill me!

Asbestos Earthlings love dying, they do it all the time. Ugh. Now then. Which of these is the go button?

[SFX of a sound a spaceship should not make. Kind of a noise like you would hear for a death animation in a retro video game.] 

Asbestos Not that one. Okay, how about-

[Another disturbing sound effect. Like a balloon deflating but electronic.] 

LINE 36. Asbestos Alright, third time's the charm.

[Fire alarm SFX. An automated voice with a New Zealand accent says "evacuate the building using the nearest fire exit" before a siren blares.]

Ham What the goshdarn heck are you doing? Go!

Asbestos I don't know, and it won't start, and it does not like me!

Ham Well, you can't stay here!  

LINE 40. Asbestos Well then help me! 

[Ham's mum sfx again] 

Ham Mum, the tractor broke down so I'm gonna help push it, okay?

Asbestos Push it where? This is a valuable craft, and if anything happens to it-

[Ham's mum] 

LINE 43. Ham Mum, it's fine, okay? We've almost got it. One, two, three, push… One, two, three, puuush… Help me out here!

Asbestos Absolutely not. Such work is beneath me! Keep pushing, Abraham! My sensors indicate you've shifted it exactly one fiftieth of a millimetre!

[Ham's mum] 

Ham (with a sigh)Okay. Mum says you can stay in our field tonight. You'd better be gone by morning, though, because if she sees you in the daylight she's going to realise that tractors aren't supposed to float.

Asbestos Well, that is extremely nice of your mother to say. Tell her I said thank you. And can you tell her my antennae are very shapely and I have a sparkling personality and I'm free this weekend by the way, just in case she's wondering?

Ham I'm going to bed.

Asbestos (slight chuckle) Goodnight, Abe! Sweet dreams.

[Rooster crowing. It's morning.]

Asbestos What's up, chat? Welcome to the second day of my becoming the president of the United States any percent speedrun. Yesterday we got off to a rough start with some technical difficulties, but today I'm determined to make up for lost time. Now, eagle-eyed viewers will have already noticed that I have drawn a strange and terrifying shape on the side of my craft in strawberry jam. This is in fact the English word "tractor" transcribed (get this) using the Latin alphabet. Ee, that's right! For today's stream, I'm going stealth mode, disguising myself as a humble farmhand in order to infiltrate-

Ham (laughing slightly) You spelt it wrong.

Asbestos What?

Ham Um, you spelt tractor wrong? It doesn't have a K in it.

Asbestos Chat, this is the enemy of the stream Hamuel Burger. I know all about you, young man. Your mother says you never pick up your socks.

Ham That's not true! Hi chat, um, my name's Ham, my pronouns are he/him, and you can find me on YouTube where I do banjo covers of-

Asbestos She also said that I was the most organised and well-disciplined young person she'd ever met, because she wasn't expecting the new farmhand to show up until the afternoon! 

Ham That's right! What are you going to do when he arrives and starts telling the whole town that an alien took his job?

Asbestos Well, he isn't going to get the chance to do that, because I'm gonna kill him! 

Ham (justifiably upset) What?

Asbestos Chat, you're about to see me employ a useful hack called "black mail". Hamuel here is going to help me fix my spaceship because if he doesn't I'm going to dispose of one of his fellow earthlings. You're a farm boy, you can fix a simple spacecraft, right? 

Ham No?

Asbestos Get to work.

Ham I can, like, change a lightbulb, maybe? This thing, though, I don't think the best mechanic in the world could save it. It doesn't even look like a machine. Like, I'm pretty sure it's made out of meat? How does that work?

Asbestos Hey! That's my son you're talking about!

Ham Your son looks less like a spaceship and like a modern art piece representing the alienation of workers under capitalism. I'm feeling exploited just looking at it. Actually, that's exactly the kind of thing my best friend Stanley would make. He's, like, this really cool artist who specialises in mixed media sculpture? His pieces are super thought-provoking. Like, this one time, he stuck a radish to a-

Asbestos Is this Stanley guy going to help me fix my spaceship? No? Then I don't care. 

Ham Actually…

[Ham's mum]

Ham That was mum, she wants you to feed the chickens if you have time. Okay, you stay here and milk the potatoes while I run and get Stanley. And keep out of trouble!

Asbestos I've never even been to Trouble! I don't know where that is! 

[Ham leaves]

Alright. I don't think milking a potato can be that hard. You just sort of have to- 

[Thump]

Ow! It fucking bit me!

TTS Hello Asbestos. Longtime fan, first time caller. I think you're holding it upside down.

Asbestos I don't tell you how to live your life. TTS (different voice) Just last week you encouraged your entire viewership to quit their jobs and invest in your shitty cryptocurrency, Sawcoin. My Grandma had to sell her house because of you.

Asbestos Sawcoin? I've never even heard of-

TTS (same voice as previous) Sawcoin deez nuts! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. ha.

Asbestos Okay guys-

LINE 70. TTS (different voice, overlapping slightly) Hi Asbestos, your stream has already taught me so much about the United States. I have started learning English so that I can better appreciate this beautiful culture. So far, I have learned many useful phrases such as "can I get ketchup with that?", and [a bunch of censorship beeps]

Asbestos That's-

TTS (different voice, overlapping slightly) Asbestos Le Guin, are you aware that two out of three of your fellow competitors are already inside the White House at this very moment, one of them holding a knife to the president's throat? And here you are arguing with your chat over the right way to milk a vegetable.

Asbestos Okay, shut the fuck up. You think my ten-year unopposed reign of the speedrunning charts for most civilisations toppled in a day was by accident? You think I've lost my edge just because these new competitors are younger than me and faster than me and have spaceships that work and know how to milk a potato? Well, you've forgotten your places. I'm the best, and I will always be the best. I don't even need my ship. Y'know, I'm going to steal a tractor right now and I won't stop until I've ridden it full speed into the president's office, hung him from the rafters with an American flag and taken his fun little hat for myself.

Ham Uh, what was that about stealing our tractor?

Asbestos Um. Nothing.

Ham I thought so. Stanley, this is-

Asbestos I am Asbestos Le Guin, an ambassador from the planet Strawberry, here to spread love and friendship throughout the cosmos. 

Ham Yeah, this is Asbestos, she's some kind of low-level Twitch streamer and she's here to kill the president. Asbestos, this is Stanley. Stanley is an artist with a poetic soul who has taken a vow of silence because he is a feminist and is dedicating his life to listening to women. He only communicates in harmonica, which I understand fluently due to our warrior's bond. 

[Jaunty harmonica]

Ham And he wants to know what kind of a name Asbestos is supposed to be. 

Asbestos It's a Spanish word meaning "fireproof", and it represents my resilient nature.

Ham … Right. Now stand back. Stanley is going to use his artistic vision and knowledge of steak preparation to make your spaceship beautiful.

[Hammering, drill, creepy opera, clown honk, mooing. Fades out.]

Ham Behold, Stanley's latest creation! A perfectly tender and juicy filet mignon seasoned with glitter and pencil shavings, served with a side of deep melancholy, yet with a subtle aftertaste of hope for humanity. This one of a kind artwork represents the cycle of life and death and rebirth while critiquing the artificial estrangement of man from his fellow organisms that our society has created.

Asbestos You cooked my spaceship! It's medium rare! 

Ham And it smells delicious! Do you mind if I-

Asbestos No! I've had enough! I should burn your pathetic planet to the ground with you still on it. Tell Stanley to stop eating the oxygen tank!

[Unfazed harmonica]

Ham Stanley says [muffled, as though chewing] but I didn't have breakfast this morning and it tastes really good!

Asbestos This is terrible! I'm already the laughing stock of the streaming world, I don't need- Hey, look at this! My views have doubled! Is it too late to change the title from "World Domination" to "Chill Cooking Stream"? Who knew this was what the people wanted? Maybe it's time to turn my life around. Maybe instead of mindlessly slaughtering galaxies, I should become a food influencer! I'll teach the people how to prepare easy, nutritious meals at home! 

Farmhand Hello? Ah, howdy. I'm the new farmhand you hired. Now, I know you weren't expecting me until the afternoon, but I just wanted to come early to get a headstart on my duties.

[Crickets.] Oh, I'm sorry, is this a bad time?

Ham No, no, it's fine, we were just having some… technical difficulties with this tractor…?

Farmhand Oh, this'n? It smells delicious, you've seasoned it perfectly. So the issue is that it just won't start?

Ham Um. Pretty much, yeah?

Farmhand Oh, not to worry, my uncle has one just like this. You can get it started with a good kick to the side. 

[Thunk. The sound of an engine starting up.]

Asbestos What the fuck? Never mind, cooking stream cancelled, we're gonna go kill the president. Stanley and Ham, you really drive viewer engagement, so you're coming with me. Farmboy, to express my sincere gratitude for your services in getting my ship started, I'm going to refrain from vaporising you on the spot for daring to kick my baby. Now run before I change my mind. Okay. Tally ho!

[Synth music]

CREDITS

Asbestos

I'd just like to take a moment to thank everyone who subscribed today and read out some of their messages. Spikes says, "hi Asbestos, I wrote the script and I play Hamuel Burger, and I'm failing university because of this podcast". Weird message, but okay. Thanks for the sub. Um, I also have one here from username "Bulk" who says, “Hey chat, I play Asbestos Le Guin and illustrated the cover art for the pod-” What is this? No fucking promoting your stuff on my own damn show, username Bulk! Ugh. Okay, last one and then I'm ending for today. Uh, this one is from Sarah, who says, “ Hiiii Asbestos, huge fan! I loved editing your voice and the whole show”. God, you guys are a real riot with this bit stuff. You just love the bit. Okay, that one was a little weird, so let's just end on another one. There's one from Freya who says, "howdy pardner, I played a charming Southern gentleman". Hey! That's the fucker who kicked my spaceship! Get back here, you varmint! 

[Scuffling]

[221b-sociopath-street]

#ted lasso for dummies

Intro Part 1

01×02 Biscuits

00:00:22 'Nestlé Shredded wheat'* *This stuff is for real - Whole Grain Wheat Cereal Biscuits. These type of breakfast food are not in shape of liked by everyone little squares, loops, balls or stars. These are fucking food BRICKS. So I really share Ted's shock.

00:02:37 'The Spice Girls.'* *It's like my childhood all over again. Phrase 'girl power' it's about them, about Spice girls, well-known and beloved all over the world british girl group. Scary Spice, Sporty Spice, Baby Spice, Ginger Spice, Posh Spice! P.S. Plus one of them is wife of football player, former captain of the England national team - David Beckham 😎. So, the theme of football is also present in this conversation between Ted and Rebecca.

00:02:45 'The Gambler himself, Mr. Kenny Rogers'*

*So, here Coach Lasso introduces us to the specific work (song The Gambler) of an American musician (Kenny Rogers). Erm, I must admit that I googled this guy, he and his work were not popular in my country. But this song definitely have Ted Lasso vibe, maybe because of country notes which take us to Kansas - homeland of our coach 🤠.

00:04:30 'We're gonna call this drill The Exorcist, because it's all about controlling possession.'* *Only Ted could compare football strategy with the demonic possession of a young girl and her mother's attempt to rescue her through an exorcism by two Catholic priests, depicted in classic American horror movie 😬.

00:06:15 'Boy George.'* *And another one musical icon from GB. You will recognize him by his soulful voice and his androgynous appearance, large hats and bright make-up.

00:12:05 'Best concert, we got Beastie Boys.'* * Yet another legend in musical industry from America. Beastie Boys are considered very influential in both the hip hop and rock music scenes, with 7 platinum albums and over the top sales in rap genre.

00:12:09 'Actually, did y'all get the O.J. trial over here?'* *And another one football related topic: the case against O. J. Simpson, a former National Football League (NFL) player, broadcaster and actor, acquitted for the murders of his ex-wife and her friend. However, Ted somehow randomly mentions this case in a conversation with Rebecca and Higgins.

00:14:10 'And if we were the Rolling Stones...'* *I must say it's some musical episode! Jamie's comparison of himself to Mick Jagger and Roy to Keith Richards is just gold, but partly accurate! The Rolling Stones - british rock band with over six decades history. Jagger and Richards are the same age, but yeah former one is a front man and latter is like in background, just like our fellas on football pitch.

00:15:19 'Ernie Lounds, The Sun'* * The Sun is bright example of fake media. Among brits it's known for spreading lies about various topics: government, celebrities etc. And football related fact: 'In Liverpool they hate the Sun because of the Hillsborough disaster. Liverpool is a great City proud of their football team. The Hillsborough disaster involved the horrible death of many football fans. The cause was bad policing and the collapse of a terrace at a football match. The Sun blamed the Liverpool fans and spoke all of the dead'

00:16:56 '... the best barbecue sauce in Kansas City.'* * Oh man, Americans and their love for all things barbecue! BBQ is just like national sport for them, witch will be not fully experienced without good BBQ sauce. Ted's favorite:

00:25:05 'Little Phife Dawg and Q-Tip comin' at you'* *Once Phife Dawg and Q-Tip, were members of the music group - A Tribe Called Quest, which split up because of creative tensions between former and latter, who were both vying for greater control of the group's direction. And I personally think that this life story greatly illustrate the current situation in FC Richmond.

[d-lanx]

Ultimate Beastmaster Moments S3E2: Semi #1 Qualifiers Pt.2

South Korean comm saying that people with the UK guy’s haircut are normally scary but that this guy’s cute.

UK guy loses his momentum in the wheel so was like “fuck it, I’m gonna fall anyway, so why not just do a flip.”

Italian birthday boy gets a cake from the comm team and Punk wishing for some cake too.

Italian comm bullying the French comms after the French guy fell.

“Here we go. The unmistakable cocky swagger of an American.” -Wade Barrett.

Punk apparently would happily name his future kid “Hotdog.”

Brazilian comm cringing so hard at South Korean guy failing the first challenge he starts climbing the booth and cuts a promo on how Brazil will win, then just lounges across the table.

Brazil comms going to cheer with the team like they won the whole thing only for their guy to actually do his run and fail in the EXACT same spot right at the start of the level as the Korean guy did. They lose all the light in their eyes, and Korean comms are fucking vibing.

Aussie competitor spent 26 days in a high security Congo prison due to police thinking he was camping out to assassinate the president.

Korean comm laughing at Aussie’s name “Irving” cos that apparently means to call someone stupid in Korean.

I fucking love the man on Mexican comm Luis Ernesto Franco. He literally goes to stand in the corner of his booth cos he’s too stressed to keep watching.

That mental Aussie headbutts the final button and is the only person to finish this episode’s first level in full.

USA comm once again making their props into fashion, now wearing the flags as bandanas.

Wade wanting a DVD of a compilation of all the competitors getting hurt in the different levels.

Punk doing the classic American mispronunciation of Glasgow that sounds like he’s saying “glass-cow.”

Just about every comm being in the German booth for support. They even brought and wore the giant inflatable pretzel. And then the competitor failed on the first challenge in the level. They all looked like they wanted to kill themselves. Brazilian comm even being like “but we united the whole world for this!! :(" New meme format just dropped.

Italian comm climbing the booth while the Korean comms were just watching him like “it’d be fucking funny if he falls.”

French comms being prepared with baguettes to cheer on their competitor.

Italian comms being so happy to see France fail (a common theme throughout this series).

Wade being so unimpressed by the Aussie doing some roly-poly showboating and being like “I could do that when I was 2! It’s gonna take more than that to impress me >:(”

South Korean comms feeling bad for making fun of Irving’s name in level 1 and being like “That was mean. He’s not stupid :(."

French comm blames Italian comm being in their booth during the last run as the reason France failed, because the mere presence of an Italian is enough to curse the French.

Wade hyping up team GB like “We're pulling for you. Here’s Winston. He’s our lucky charm! >:(” and very seriously placing Winston down in the table to activate his power.

Team GB guy holding onto the pole by one hand about to fall in the water and somehow manages to pull himself up and out. Holy fuck. He really fucking came in clutch on this one the whole way through all with an apparently injured shoulder.

Italian competitor’s brother keeps getting compliments on his moustache.

Italian comm ready to end it all after Italy failed, climbing over the table to leave the booth and the French comm being like “no it isn’t worth it honey.”

The last place in the semis come down to UK vs USA i.e. CM Punk vs Wade Barrett. UK wins by a mile. Punks dramatic cry to the heavens while Wade is gloating is glorious.

UK comms come to sing the national anthem in the USA booth and Punk’s sulking. Then the Aussies come to join in to support the commonwealth. Punk tries to off himself by climbing out the booth while Korean comm tries to stop him. This whole section is pure gold.

Wade goes down to talk to their athlete after the run, and even gives him a little crown to wear :) And Wade picks him up in a fireman carry to celebrate.

[athomewiththecicadas]

Life as a Senior NCO for a Head of Household that can't Provide, during Morning Coffee.

So all of these head honchos that are the hotshots.

They get to meet my weapons system. And we'll see why Sergeant First Class is "the Senior."

The Cookie Monster is "Head of Household."

Let's get him to meet "the height." And he's gonna teach all the girls how to be military officers.

Now that would have him.

"Miss Americana" didn't measure up to her girlfriends?

So "Taylor Guitars" can start with the "American Beauty Pageant," and the "women's dressing room." And when she finds the Universities are the split between Staff Sergeant and Sergeant First Class, they'll get some hands on experience with what it takes just to "see." And then she can figure out my "price" is not such a bad deal after all.

"It was her, and I would have her. And it's not just that I was a 25 year old boyfriend that was hot." (* And if that's not good enough, I'll sic Troy Aikman on you.)

Sergeant Major Nathan Marksmith, North Wales Militia/ Joint Militia Detachment Brigade (Virginia Militia Association)

--------

Oh .... Look at this. They are having so many problems.

Someone call up the State Department to invite the King of England. Because the President is having an Attorney General.

Listen to him. $40 isn't that cheap. Even make a special advertisement.

You want to know how Capital Group got started? I was a Sergeant First Class and was awarded merit for "best dressed" and "good behavior." Which you know the Army calls that a paid.

And afterwards I took up "small business." Compiling a portfolio of small businesses with a small "private equity," which is the correct term, to marry all of these small businesses and training start ups.

Some what similar to a Real Estate Investment Trust, or REIT.

-------

Okay, the President is struggling with "China." And how the economy is too weak to handle when the workforce breaks off from business facilitation.

And that's where it gets a little too personal with Shareholders and employers.

And that gets you right back to the Central Banks, and dress code. Which is directly related to minimum wage law.

Now, if you remember correctly, I struggled for years to point out that we are having an issue with extensive growth related to the new minimum wage law. And if I can't secure the investment I need, we're going to have a market bubble. And it could be the size of a market bust.

And the excuse was always: "You guys don't have the name to get that kind of investment."

And because of that, all I have to do is sit on a bill that says: "You're gonna need it."

Which turns out to every excuse in the world is out spending the simple fact that minimum wage also increases labor costs for general welfare.

Yeah, we need to spend more money on purchasing for what we use, but my complaint is still the size of payrolls.

-------

I'll say it again, none of you actually qualify traditional PT for $2 million. As far as capabilities, I'm off.

But then you get into espionage, confusing who is who.

And even though it doesn't really need $2.3 million, I'll admit it touches it.

However, in all fairness, if I was to go back and review enumerations with my Executive Officer, you would see there is plenty of room already for demotions. Because, none of this qualifies Physical Fitness standards to begin with.

And, I, as Senior NCO, have issued enumerations that still fall within your qualifications for the stated regulation.

If there is still an issue that must be reviewed, the White House can review the United Nation's "pact for the future."

If you are assuming that I, as Senior NCO, am assuming a position that is too arrogant, then you should address the claim I issued for this gaping hole in General Welfare.

-------

If you want to go back and review the wording. I'm addressing the elasticity of these claims addressed to Congress. Where the counter part is directly affiliated with posted Tax Laws. Which is still your job.

Otherwise the elasticity of a Militia, Necessary to the Security of a Free State is then relavant.

It's posted. Military Asset.

[psychotrope777]

im really gonna crack up man like im really gonna lose my shit one of these days.

ive sent application after application to all these different dumps for the last 3 months and none of them have come back. none of them pay more than maybe 15 an hour at best. and this fucking freelance thing i just tried to look into to at least supplement me with a form of income while i look for a job is a total shitshoot its garbage i flat out dont even know if i can do it. im 19 right now im lucky im not like fucking paying rent or anything. but i sure will have to eventually! it's bad enough i feel like a fuckup who can't keep a job after i got fired from my last dump but like. only so much time

virtually all of my family and friends age 20 - 30 live in fucking dumpy little tenement apartments and those are the ones who can even get places of their own. dont know if i even know anyone who makes more than like maybe 30K a year. and i think we're still the lucky ones. my parents got a 3 bedroom house back in 2001 and i live with them. but i cant live here forever, like financially socially emotionally thats just not... feasible for me. i think they said a little over 11% of americans live under the poverty line? and then there's a study that says america has the worst poverty rate out of 26 "developed" nations. this country is a fucking sick little joke. an empire built off of genocide that brutalizes the rest of the world while its citizens rot in the streets. a twisting labyrinth of dead-end jobs and unwalkable cities with nothing to do but toil and die. what is new york city if not a giant factory town? and this does not even cover one one-eighth of what is wrong with this stupid shitshow of a country

and whatever i know i should just be grateful for what i have (what do i have?) and i know it's a common sentiment among poor / impoverished people to be like well you just need to hustle harder well this is just how it is etc etc but like just what an absurd fucking way to think like you guys are fucking high. people shouldn't live like this. people can't live like this. it's not sustainable. it's not realistic. we have to have a right to shelter and food and literally at the bare minimum to fucking survive like... i mean for fuck's sake there are wild dogs who live in tiny rock dens smeared with their own shit and blood who still have a better quality of life than human beings in our beautiful utopian capitalist society. at least ants and wolves look out for each other. what happens when you fall sick or become homeless in america? what happens if you don't have enough money in america?

with every new day i feel more and more like anything resembling a fulfilling life is just not possible here. i don't know where else i would go. i know travel is expensive. idk i just like. i know this is my home and it does feel like a cop-out but i can't live like this. nobody can live like this. fuuuuck this. honest to christ even if north korea was actually one quarter as bad as US propaganda says it is that would be better than this. at least under the Cold Cruel Hand of Communism i'd have something to fall back on. i'd be insured and have a place to live. what do we have in capitalist america? a weak nod of acknowledgement? and you know what my least favorite part of "patriotic" american bullshit is? if this is really the "best country on earth" we might as well just start organizing mass suicides.

and now with senile old fuck biden regurgitating israeli propaganda and encouraging the senseless murder of palestinians i just think. and this is the guy democrats wanted. this is the guy that republicans were shitting themselves over telling themselves he'd turn america communist or whatever. god if youre still even taking calls from this fucking tragedy of a planet i hope some sort of incurable and highly infectious plague breaks out inside the white house and all of those stupid fucks end up with abscesses forming inside their brains. it might not fix anything but it'd take some of those perverted vultures off the face of the earth so it'd be a nice pick-me-up at least. UGHHHHHHHHHH

[kevinsreviewcatalogue]

Review: Cocaine Bear (2023)

Cocaine Bear (2023)

Rated R for bloody violence and gore, drug content and language throughout

Score: 4 out of 5

<Originally posted at https://kevinsreviewcatalogue.blogspot.com/2023/02/review-cocaine-bear-2023.html>

...yup. There's really not a whole lot I can say about Cocaine Bear that isn't right there on the poster and in the very title. It's a film, based very loosely on a true story from the 1980s, about an American black bear that gets its nose into a big shipment of cocaine that was dropped in Chattahoochee-Oconee National Forest by drug traffickers, and proceeds to go on a drug-fueled rampage against everybody who sets foot in the forest. (In real life, the bear simply died of an overdose. Its taxidermied corpse is now on display in a mall in Lexington, Kentucky.) It's a movie that's more or less trying to do what Snakes on a Plane did, a comedic killer animal flick that was made to become an internet meme and plays out like Jaws if it were written by sketch comedy writers (which isn't far from the truth, as this film was directed by Elizabeth Banks and produced by Phil Lord and Chris Miller), and in my opinion, it pulls it off more successfully. The cast played their characters seriously enough that I actually cared about whether they lived or died, which made the film's drug humor, '80s references, and druggie bear antics that much funnier, and while I could never really call it scary, it still had some vicious kills to it and plenty of gore. The cast felt overstuffed early on with multiple subplots taking time away from each other and the bear, but once the bear started solving that problem in the way that a bear typically does, things moved along much more smoothly. It's a movie where everybody involved understood the assignment and delivered exactly the movie you'd expect, a simple, short, and sweet horror-comedy about a killer bear.

For a movie with a premise like this, it actually takes a bit of time before it really gets to the cocaine bear, instead spending the first act following various people who are about to get caught up in the bear's rampage: the criminals Daveed and Eddie who get dispatched by Eddie's drug lord father Syd White to retrieve the cocaine, the mother and nurse Sari who is searching for her daughter Dee Dee after she cut class with her friend Henry to explore the forest, the detective Bob from Knoxville, Tennessee who heads down to the forest after the drug smuggler's body lands up in his jurisdiction, a trio of local teen delinquents named the Duchamps who have stumbled upon the cocaine and want to take it and sell it for themselves, and the park ranger Liz who winds up dragged into everything that's happening in her forest. It's a surprisingly big cast for a movie like this, filled with recognizable faces, and if you ask me, it was perhaps a bit too big. The first act is jam-packed with subplots on top of subplots such that it doesn't really have much room to breathe, and I probably would have narrowed the focus of the film to just the two pools of characters who actually matter while treating the rest as cannon fodder. Character development matters, but it was clear from the start who existed purely to get killed off in creative fashion, and there's a reason why most body-count horror movies reserve the real subplots for the people who we're still gonna be following in the third act.

Which is why my enjoyment of the film was directly proportional to the number of people the bear had killed, as it not only provided scenes of a coked-up bear killing and eating people, it narrowed and sharpened the film's focus by removing extraneous characters. The bear was noticeably a CG creature effect, but given the outrageous tone the film was going for, I was able to forgive some of the spotty effects, especially when the practical effects work of things like hands and legs getting torn off and a man's guts getting ripped out and eaten was top-notch. Little of it was particularly scary outside a few moments, but this was a comedy more than it was a horror movie, and both the character beats and the more farcical humor, from things like Daveed's anger over his favorite jersey getting ruined and young Henry accidentally inhaling some airborne powder and showing signs throughout the film that he's high on cocaine (and, of course, the antics of the titular bear), kept me laughing throughout. It's simple humor, but it worked.

The cast, too, knocked it out of the park and made me care more about their characters than I normally would have. The thing was that, even amidst the antics going on around them, they were all playing it pretty straight -- Keri Russell and Brooklynn Prince played Sari and Dee Dee like they were in a serious thriller about a mother searching for her daughter, Alden Ehrenreich and O'Shea Jackson, Jr. (son of Ice Cube) played Eddie and Daveed like they were in a crime drama about a missing drug shipment, the late Ray Liotta (in his final film role) played Syd as a vile scumbag of a drug lord, and there was even a European hiker, Olaf, played by Kristofer Hivju who drops the "funny foreigner" shtick and starts acting legitimately horrified and heartbroken after his fiancé Elsa becomes the bear's first victim. The fact that the film took its characters seriously may have weighed it down in the first act when it was overstuffed with them, but as the film went on, it grounded the affairs and gave them real stakes that made me want to see these people get out alive (and outright cheer when Syd finally got what he had coming to him).

The Bottom Line

Cocaine Bear is exactly what it says on the tin, and it delivers exactly what it promises in a very fun package. To quote the tagline on the poster, get in line.

[jackawful]

OKAY SO this is gonna be long and involve a lot of context. Bear with me.

There's been an ongoing Discourse for the past few months wherein people argue about whether to vote for biden in light of him supporting israel's genocide of palestinians, directly, by providing the weapons and funding that enable them to do war crimes. The argument is that he's Better Than Trump, and that led to a moment where, uh, just skim this knowyourmeme page I guess. That's the "voting for 99% hitler" bit.

Of course being less than a year out from an election means we're also at the start of Vote Blue No Matter Who posting season, but a handful of this season's picks have had a distinctly rancid flavor that I am kind of losing it over. The one that seems to have kicked it off is this post and its first two reblogs, advocating for "calling out performative radicalism" while framing electoral action - voting and campaigning and calling reps - as effective. OP responded to me & others pushing back with this:

So here's the thing: most leftists, especially anarchists, draw a line between violence against people & "violence" against property, so equating the two is already a red flag. But then there's the insistance that only fox news would report on leftist property destruction when it's mainly anarchist outlets (like crimethinc & It's Going Down) that do that, and they do that in a positive light. Heck, Fox did pick up on the Jane's Revenge arson/vandalism campaign post-2020, they've run negative press on the Stop Cop City movement, and they've done stories on how scary it is that trans people are buying guns. Fox News was terrifyed when mostly-anarchist leftists started guarding drag queen story hours with guns instead of just letting proud boys do vigilante violence. There's not much cop murder, but there are leftist radicals doing shit that sometimes includes physically fighting cops and getting national media attention all the time - assuming good faith, this person clearly just doesn't believe it's real because they haven't seen those stories, or assuming bad faith, they don't want others to believe it's a real and possible thing.

And then there's this post which...it's clearly inspired by the first one and it's coming from a non-american who's barely an adult, so I don't want to be too harsh, but it also means they're missing a TON of context around why americans have stopped expecting voting to change things, AND contributes to the denial of existance of radical direct action. Without really intending to (I hope, anyway) they seem like they're goading people into talking about specific illegal things they've done in order to have credibility talking about radical tactics. Which, as I've explained in the linked posts, is a huge security risk. If you hear from people taking credit for shit on the level of firebombing walmart, it's either completely anonymously or from prison with lawyer supervision.

But saying all this post-2020, when plenty of people smashed cop car windshields & there was more public approval of burning the third precinct than there's been for most presidents? Maddening and infuriating to me. If you're in a major city in the US, the likelihood that you know someone who has done the kind of radical direct action being flattened into "firebombing a walmart" is higher now than its been since roughly the 60s.

It's really obvious this is all people getting vaguely mad at online anarchists for talking about and encouraging direct action while trying to convince said anarchists to vote democrat AND claiming that no one talking about radical direct action is actually doing it. The "knitting" is arson and graffiti and smashing windows and physically fighting cops/fascists. And I think it's important to understand that these things are happening, and will happen more when the US has its next riot season, and that you can talk about how and why people do these things without being specific because being vague is safer.

On a different level it upsets me because social movements tend to get the most gains when radicals and liberals work together instead of denouncing each other. That's another reason I hope everyone nodding along to OPs here reads up on the Stop Cop City movement - that's a wonderful example of using all tactics, from local electoral politics to (impressively frequent) sabotage and arson, and not denouncing each other, and construction only being delayed because of all tactics being employed at once where just one would've been more likely to fail.

If you don't know about Chris Dorner or Willem Van Spronsen or any number of still-anonymous cases of leftist political violence and property damage, you should probably stop talking as if it doesn't exist. Instead of denying that revolutions and uprisings happen, you can research ones that did & look for similar news items happening now. You don't get to know who's planning to firebomb walmart. If you think you don't know anyone who's done political violence or property damage, it's probably because they know you're not down and won't tell you, not because it Doesn't Happen.

Can you imagine if knitting was illegal and assholes on tumblr were like "you have to vote for 99% hitler because I know y'all aint knitting baby blankets" and encouraging people to talk about their clandestine knitting circles where the cops can see. I will point you toward patterns and publically state that knitting is good and should be decriminalized and more people should learn to knit. but you, internet user, do not get to know whether I or anyone else owns knitting needles while knitting is still illegal.