#accidentally wrote a love-letter to a character while planning to write... a love-letter

[fade-out-lights]

i love this character so much, i really don't get it when people say gege hates him (or any other character), because he is a well-written character. he's complex - and i'm not here to talk about faves etc. because obviously different people may love different characters and might not be that invested in some characters' stories yada yada - and if you're following his story it does make you emotional. at first, he looks carefree but powerful, then he's cute, then he's arrogant - and you wait for all of it to connect, to come into place. often, such things come into place when you're finally acquainted with a character's weakness. in his case, his weakness only confirms to him that he's been right all along (he's cocky but confident and smart), so he takes up this role of a mentor figure (caring and somewhat compassionate) despite knowing that he's not that suitable for it (again, another characteristic of his is self-awareness).

as gege said, gojo's both strength and weakness is his personality and the character knows it as well. to me, that what makes him interesting - he knows too much about what he is. he knows it to the point that he can't escape it, he chose not to, or, more like, he accepted that he was not going to be the one to see the changes, the future. yuuta had told him not to make a monster out of himself all on his own, but it's what gojo'd been doing almost all the time. it is the way he could contribute, do the dirtiest job.

despite not being "good", not being good at all, he is loved. he's passionate about using his powers, he loves to fight, so he gets a great fight. he hates how the system treats sorcerers, so he gets a bunch under his wing.

and i think it's when you see all the different traits in him and try to follow why he decides to do something, you think "wow, he really didn't have a chance".

i feel stupid (i’ve only seen the anime and idc about manga spoilers) but could u explain more about gojo’s dehumanization?

ksjgrhd not stupid dw!

honestly, in my opinion, every character in jjk shows the dehumanization in jujutsu society, but no one embodies this more than gojo.

because he was born with infinity and six eyes, he was raised as a weapon rather than a person. from the questions gege answered recently about him, it seems that he never had much of a childhood. he was taken away from his parents at a young age to begin his training, and was sent on a lot of missions before he even started at jujutsu tech.

by the time he starts at jujutsu tech, he's already accepted that his role is to be the strongest, and protect those who are weaker than him. he operates on a sort of autopilot, allowing himself to be a weapon for jujutsu society. this mindset is shown well in his past arc.

he doesn't apply meaning or reasoning to the things he does, he simply does as he's asked, sort of taking away his agency. in his youth, he complies with this, and doesn't seem to question it much until after geto goes rogue. but by then, it's already been established that if something goes awry, gojo will just take care of it, which is present throughout jjk. there's always the lingering idea that nothing bad can happen as long as gojo is there to stop it, which is why him being sealed is such an important part of kenjaku's plan in shibuya.

ik you said you don't mind manga spoilers, but for everyone else MANGA SPOILERS HERE!

throughout jjk, it's obvious that gojo is the pillar that jujutsu society rests on, and many characters see him that way. but i think the moment that made it appallingly obvious that gojo has been consistently dehumanized throughout the series is when yuuta copies kenjaku's technique and uses it to transfer himself into gojo's corpse in order to use his technique against sukuna. people were OUTRAGED at gege for this, as if this hasn't in essence been happening since gojo was born (it's a bit different now that there's desecration of a corpse involved, i get that, but in terms of dehumanization).

the most outright statement of gojo's treatment in jujutsu society comes from yuuta, and i think it explains it better than i can.

until this moment, no one has given a second thought to gojo being used as a weapon, and carrying the weight of being the strongest on his own.

it was interesting to watch people blame gege's distaste for gojo as a character for his dehumanization and , as if it hasn't been a central theme forever, as solidified by yuuji in 265, where he shakes his own mentality of being dehumanized, made into a cog in the jujutsu society machine.

it's especially ironic to me because the fandom complains about gojo's dehumanization, while simultaneously dehumanizing him. large portions of the fandom only view him as strong, other portions view him as a sex object, other portions view him as only a half of satosugu, etc.....anyway. i'm not sure if this was the greatest explanation, but hopefully it helped some.

[cartoonrival]

Keeping Up With The Uzumakis!!! I read that years ago! I can’t believe it’s back! I just went through the entire With Cheese tag and it has some gold in it, the gender sexuality headcanons especially are golden! Idk if they’re still canon but I love them.

Trans Nauto and Hinata is both inspired and accidentally canon (wisker marks coming from being in the womb on jinchuuriki and all) because of how careful you are with canon I’m sure it’s intentional

Sasuke being gay, we been knowing this since he was 12

I need Sakura to start sleeping with everybody at the hospital the second she find out about the affair. She must have so so much repressed sexual energy that can only really come out by sleeping with Ino, but Ino’s married and actually happy about that so the blonde nurse assigned to ward 4 will have to make due.

Kakashi being ambiguously bisexual is great, you never know what exactly he is feeling except that he’s feeling something about Guy (And also Obito and Rin during the war, but that’s in his PAST and therefore NOT his PROBLEM anymore)

Guy being gay, perfect no notes

Rock Lee’s gender and Sexuality being Rock Lee, perfect. Nobody is doing it like Rock Lee.

More inspired trans headcanons with Boruto and Sarada, once again hitting male characters with the Tranfem-ification beam and also Sasuke leaving Konoha with a son and coming back to a daughter. Sakura totally wrote to him about her transition with all of the medical and personal details but Sasuke never read them because he was too busy reading Naruto’s Horny Letters tm.

Ps, will the next chapter/episode/installment thing take over a year again? It’s fine if it does there’s so much gold in it it’s completely worth the wait.

IM GLAD YOU LIKE IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!! <33 having read kuwtu "years ago" seriously scared me but yeah ig ep 0 was a year and a half ago .... SCARY ........

most of the gender/sexuality stuff is either the same or adjacent to my actual headcanons outside of kuwtu which are mostly either canon supported or compliant (my usual hc for naruto is trans and bi aroace, sasuke is arospec gay, etc. i initially made naruto trans because i'm trans and i thought it would be awesome, i did realize a little after that the whiskers thing implied that he was lol. i like trans sakura in canon but she can't be trans for kuwtu because that wouldve required sasuke to be also trans and be the one to carry sarada which he could never do. the complexity of naruto's canon sexuality wrt romantic vs platonic love is unnecessary for kuwtu and complicates things in a way that takes away from the reality tv humor. aroaces aren't known for relationship drama).

i don't currently have any plans for sakura or hinata to find out about the affair because i can't really figure how to make that funny since it would be such a massive and terrible betrayal. sakura and naruto have sort of drifted apart atp, but at one point they were best friends, and learning that her best friend was sleeping with her husband would be so fucking insane that i just don't really have the heart to write it unless i get blessed with some really hilarious idea for it, lol. hinata's pov in kuwtu is already depressing as is-- you all haven't seen much of her and idk how to integrate her pov in rn, but the humor from her end comes largely from the tonal dissonance rather than from her actually having funny reactions to her shitty marriage like sakura does.

that said, if sakura DID find out about the affair, i don't think that she is the type to sleep around because she is waaaay too tied down by responsibility. the whole reason why she hasn't divorced sasuke is in order to maintain the status quo for sarada, so while she would definitely go more than a little crazy at this info i don't think she would be sleeping with any employees. you are 100% right though that she has repressed sexual energy because she hasn't had sex in 12 years.

my usual hc for kakashi is aroace with bisexual tendencies specifically because he has a weird gay thing going on with gai. in kuwtu the kakagai joke is that they have a weird gay thing going on and they're always attached at the hip but never explicitly romantic, which tbh is basically true about boruto canon as well. again i haven't found a good opportunity to work kakashi and gai into kuwtu ... but i think about it because they're really important to me. im a kakaobi anti but that is neither here nor there.

transfem boruto is important to me, i have a comic that vaguely touches on it scripted but idk if im ever gonna actually make it. if i get to a point where i know im never gonna draw it then ill post the script. i'm not entirely sure what the circumstances for his and sasuke's training vacay is since kuwtu has, as far as ive considered, literally none of the conflict elements that boruto canon has, so they might just go off cuz boruto wanted to be taught by sasuke (he admires sasuke as a ninja even if he thinks sasuke as a person is lame as fuck and cringe).

i don't currently have any plans for the next installment. since ep 0 and The Truth were both rewrites of actual events in boruto canon, atp i have to be like fully original which is harder, lol. so i don't know..... i really love the kuwtu cast but i don't have any full comic ideas for them rn.

anyways THANK YOU! IM GLAD YOU LIKE KUWTU BECAUSE I DO ALSO ... <3

[wintercloudburst]

well, it's been a week since i posted the final chapter so...

What I’ve Done chapter sixteen thoughts, for those interested (but mainly for myself)

*SPOILERS*

So we finally finish the story... I have been working on this fic since 2021 on and off and finally finishing it brought up so many feelings but overall im really happy with what i've done (accidental pun).

(Side note: the fic title is in fact just based on What I've Done by Linkin Park, because I felt like it perfectly encapsulated Catra's journey throughout the story).

We open up with adora's anxiety relating to a event that has passed, I had been wanting to explore Adora's own feelings of anxiety after writing Catra's feelings towards their newly developed relationship. I feel like Adora was a big anchor to Catra's own struggles but i felt it was important to also show the other side of the coin. Throughout the story we had seen bits and pieces of Adora's struggle with anxiety and her impulsivity when it came to decision making, so I thought it important to show "ok we are together but we are both still struggling to understand one another and struggling to find our footing in this relationship.

I also wanted Adora to find out about Catra's old phone in an organic way (my initial outline had the reveal after their first time having sex last chapter but that felt waay too loaded) and I wanted the knowledge of the phone to kinda hang over them.

ANother thing i wanted was for Adora to switch majors, in a few chapters we kinda get a glimpse of this terrible anxiety she gets from her major, and the way it seems like it doesn't really align with her. I thought finishing her character arc by allowing her to take agency of what she really feels passionate about was really necessary for her as a character. Also I kept picturing her in lil scrubs just exhausted but so happy.

Throughout all the outlines of this story i have written they were always going to throw the phone away together. However, initially i had planned for them to throw it out and THEN get together. which would have been interesting but definitely might have felt a little rushed in my opinion.

I cried lots of times writing this chapter and one of them was in fact, the scene where they are driving toward the camping site. I kept thinking about how Catra would feel, preparing herself to give up on something so monumental and i couldn't help tearing up shdkhfkghdf.

The camp scene: I wanted to illustrate the domisticity that they built and Adora just generally feeling a lot better about her life than the last time we had seen her pov.

As for Catra's letters: when i wrote the second chapter i had written about some letters Catra had written and never sent and i thought... what if the way she lets go isnt just by throwing an old phone out but also by letting go of all those feelings she had held onto for so long.

I couldn't stop crying while writing the letters, specifically the one that says she saw Scorpia's nine year old nephew playing and was filled with sadness.. Catra is finally old enough to view her abuse as senseless, as she watches a kid around the same age as when it had started playing in a party. realizing you weren't the one to blame, no matter how much of a troublemaker you might have been.

And yes... Idk how anybody felt about this chapter but i thought this scene was impactful to ME and that's probably all that matters shdfkhdglf.

The wedding: I wanted to show them being happy years in the future, even if they probably are both still dealing with their individual issues, they are a team. I also just wanted to showcase their friends and family being so accepting of them and celebrating their love

I genuinely had to rewrite the ending multiple times but i feel like it's a good note to end on and I'm happy i was able to work on this story for so long. It just means the world to me!

Anyways thanks if anybody actually reads this for taking the time to read and i hope you guys liked my silly little fanfic !!!

[scifimagpie]

Oops, I accidentally a whole book. Is that bad?

 Forgive that absolute blast from the past of a title. (For those going, "huh?", it's an obscure, out-of-date meme. Don't worry about it.)

But - yeah. One of many reasons this blog has been immensely quiet over the last few months, apart from that book bundle including The Meaning Wars, is that I've been completely obsessed with a new project, called Prairie Weather.

Back in university, I had a short story column in The Meliorist, the U of L's school paper, and I wrote a series of one-off shorts with loosely connected characters. I'd always toyed with the idea of writing a whole novel about these interconnected characters - and well, for some reason, around October of last year, I just got up and did it.

So now the connected stories of a group of university students trying to deal with friendship, romance, and all the resulting drama has become not one book, but two - or three, depending on whether I go indie with this or get picked up for trad pub (traditional publishing). It's set in 2011, right here in Lethbridge, and it's a love letter to the city and the university - both of which are beautiful, and underutilized as settings. If you like feminism, queer love, heartbreak, stabbings, and bomb threats, you'll probably be into this book.

Now, I'm actually going to try and send out some queries for Prairie Weather, and see if I can get it traditionally published. That's a thing I haven't really done before, and it might go absolutely nowhere, but I thought I'd take a shot at it. At worst, I get to improve my query-writing skills, mess around with Querytracker, sorta learn how to write a synopsis, and that sort of useful thing.

I was also going through my blog archives and stats, and I noticed a huge surge in traffic last month. So, thank you for the views! I didn't realise just how much I used to write on here.

But unfortunately, Blogger is a pretty dead platform, and all the cool kids are on Substack and Patreon these days. So while I do plan to continue posting over here, if I don't get anywhere with Prairie Weather, I'm going to try serialising that publication on Ream, Substack, and Patreon. We'll see if I get any traction. In the meantime, if any of y'all somehow know an agent who's hunting for contemporary fiction or literary fiction, hit me up!

And yes, I am still planning to try and get Monsters and Fools out this year. It's at about 63 of roughly 80k, give or take. There's a few big plot twists left to write, and then this dark sequel to The Underlighters will finally, finally be ready to release into the world. The sequel is more of a dystopian, noire-toned piece, and will focus on what happens when activism fails in the face of a conspiracy...

If you thought it was dark before? It's only going to get darker.

***

A writer and professional freelance editor, Michelle Browne lives in Lethbridge, AB with her partners-in-crime and their cats. She is currently working on the next books in her series, other people's manuscripts, knitting, jewelry-making, and drinking as much tea as humanly possible.

Find her all over the internet: *Website * Mailing list * Magpie Editing * Amazon * Tumblr * Mastodon *Facebook * Medium * Twitter  * OG Blog* Instagram * Paypal.me * Ko-fi

[helloheyhihowdyheya]

On a Tuesday | pt. 2 of 2

Peter Parker x fem!reader

Part One Masterlist

Summary: Life had been a bit lonely – that is until Peter Parker brightened up your life. On a Tuesday. And when that friendship seems to fizzle out on a Tuesday? You’re sure the universe is playing some sort of trick on you. 

Word Count: ~14,900 (i’m sorry)

Warnings: A bit of angst. Fluff. Reunited friends to lovers. Hurt/comfort. Canon level violence. Description of wounds and stitching it up. Some angst. Brief mention of throwing up. It gets just a teensy suggestive at the end. Light swearing.

A/N: Thank you so much for the love! I hope this ending fixes all the angst I caused. I really enjoyed writing these characters, and they took my story that was supposed to be short and ran with it lol. I hope you love it, and thank you for reading! I love hearing your thoughts <3

                                           *

You finally saw your new house after spending too many days cramped in a box-filled car with your parents. It was bigger, but the roominess felt cold, and lonely. Carrying your things in and finding your bedroom, you hoped filling it with decorations and old stuffed animals that made the room yours would help it feel better. Like a new start, rather than an ending.

Starting at a new school halfway through high school wasn’t the easiest. Your body tried pulling in on itself like it did all those years ago spent alone in middle school. But remembering the way Peter changed that all around made up your mind – you wouldn’t let yourself fall into despair again. And you had learned you couldn’t rely on others to fix things.

Remembering Peter did hurt, and you thought about unblocking him nearly every day. But you found some students that you shared classes with, and you somehow worked up the courage to ask if you could sit with them at lunch. And as they accepted you, welcoming you with interested questions and light jokes, it really did feel like a beginning.

Through the last two years of high school, Gwen was really the only one you talked to from back home. She was set on sending letters back and forth, wanting to keep up the tradition you had accidentally started. She updated you on what was happening in school and the town in general. You smiled down at the paper, reading her words of Harry doing better. His grades were good, sure, but he carried himself differently. She rarely mentioned Peter, though when she did, it mostly talked about how little he showed up around school anymore.

And you got a few cards from Aunt May for your birthday and some holidays, her swooping handwriting gracing a love-filled card with sweet messages in them. You sent thank-you cards back to her every time and sent a card for her birthday. You would write “Hope you and Peter are doing well!” but couldn’t bring yourself to ask further about him. Similar to Gwen, May just wrote that he seemed good but was often gone from the house.

The years passed quickly as you got a bit more involved with friends and school, keeping your grades up so you could get into the colleges you were looking at. You thought about local universities, ones your new friends might go to, but the thought of returning to New York pulled at the back of your mind.

In her letters, Gwen mentioned attending Empire State University, and you couldn’t deny the way hope bloomed in your chest at the thought of being with her again. And though Flash was also planning on attending, she told you Harry was thinking about it as well. The home you were forced to leave behind called to you, and as your high school announced your name while walking across the stage, they also announced that you would be attending ESU.

Your parents had decided to make a whole trip out of it – to visit old friends after moving you in for college orientation. You all pulled up to the campus parking lot and got out, your eyes watching all the students and supervisors running around. There was barely any time to process the chaos when you heard a squeal from Gwen, your new college roommate. 

She gave a crushing hug, and while her bright laugh and the genuine jokes between you two seemed exactly the same, there was still a two-year space between you. Still, none of it felt like it mattered when she pulled away and said, “I can’t believe you’re actually here, in the flesh. I’m so excited. Come check out our apartment!” Your cheeks soon started hurting from smiling so hard.

You two got an on-campus apartment, and while its walls were an ugly off-white and had too many mysterious stains, it was a home with Gwen. Your parents and her father caught up while helping you unpack. The place started to look like a real living space when a knock rang out on the apartment door.

Gwen looked at you, biting her lip as a smile grew across her face. “Oh, I invited our first real guest. I hope that’s okay!” she said while opening the door. She cackled at the way your mouth dropped open when you saw Harry standing in the hallway.

She let him in, but he only took a step before you crashed into him to give a long-overdue hug. “Harry, you’re really here. It’s been so long,” you said, trying to keep the happy tears from coming out.

“Hey, kid,” he breathed out, his cheek resting against your head. 

You pulled back, admiring the way his features had grown sharper and his hair shorter since you last saw him. With a smile, you said, “You’re just in time to help us decorate. We need your expertise.”

He nodded with a wide grin, giving a fake bow and said, “Do not fret. Your hero has now arrived.”

“Wow, a hero? Are you secretly Spider-Man?” Gwen asked, sarcasm dripping in her voice and making the parents laugh.

You said, “Oh, yeah. I can’t believe I’ll actually get to see the famous New York Spider-Man, unless of course he’s in front of me right now.” You gestured to Harry, but he just lightly smacked your arm and got to helping you unpack and decorate.

Gwen had written to you about this strange masked vigilante, about the people that loved him and those that weren’t as nice about it. You had seen some big events on the news about him, and you understood the risks he made that people disliked, but you couldn’t bring yourself to hate him. He was clearly trying to help a city that desperately needed it. You were excited to actually see him in action.

With these thoughts drifting through your head, you glanced over at Gwen and Harry discussing where to put a lamp. Gwen put the lampshade on Harry’s head and laughed, their infectious energy bringing you over to join their antics. 

And that’s how college began. All three of you had your own majors and clubs you were in, but at the end of the day, it would be Gwen, Harry, and you sitting down to have crappy cafeteria food together. It felt like the right balance you had been looking for back in high school, and your heart was finally content.

That was until Parent Weekend rolled around the next month. Your parents couldn’t make the long trek out, but you were just fine spending the weekend with Gwen’s dad and brothers. Harry tagged along as well, as his father had other duties to attend to. Her younger brothers were busy playing some carnival games the school had set up, and the college’s mascot was roaming around to get everyone excited for the football game that day.

You turned away from one of the concession stands after grabbing cotton candy when it felt like your breath was knocked from your chest. There, a few feet away, stood Aunt May enjoying a food stand hotdog. After taking a bite, she looked up, and your eyes connected. The world seemed to pause for a moment before you rushed over to her food in hand.

She immediately wiped her mouth and brought you in for a hug. She said, “Do my eyes deceive me? Oh my lord, is it really you?”

You nodded, your face crinkling as a smile grew over your face. “May, I can’t believe it. I’m so happy to see you.”

She squeezed your hand before asking a million questions about what has changed over the past two years, and she responded in between bites. After a few minutes, you heard Gwen calling your name, and you waved her and Harry over. “You guys will never believe who I ran into!”

As soon as May saw them, her eyes became glassy. The four of you shared a moment together, catching up with wide smiles like almost nothing had changed. Except… Gwen asked the question floating in the air. “Hey, May, what are you doing here, by the way? Peter isn’t…” She trailed off, letting May fill in the blank. You were glad you weren’t the only one unaware of what Peter was up to these days.

And you had been so caught up in seeing May again that you’d nearly forgotten all about Peter and his number you blocked so long ago. Almost like her words were far away or underwater, you heard her distantly say, “I would say I’m surprised he didn’t tell you, but he didn’t tell me you guys were here either! He made a last-minute decision to attend ESU, but I’m here to surprise him. He thinks I’m busy working, but I’m sure he’s around here somewhere…”

They continued chatting about it, but their voices didn’t really reach your ears as you turned around to look for him. Peter was here? 

You searched through the crowds of students and families wearing your college’s colors, but it was noisy and the air smoky from the concession stands working overtime. You were about to turn back and tune into the conversation again when you heard that unmistakable laugh, a melodic sound your ears refused to forget.

You whipped your head around to locate the noise, and when you finally saw him, your breath escaped you. With his face tilted backward and his hand on his chest, his body shook with laughter as he walked next to another student several yards away. He wore a university t-shirt, the short sleeves showing off his arms. Did they always look like that?

It’s then you noticed how he had grown, again. But mostly, he looked fuller, more complete. Like himself again, except his glasses were gone. You had always hoped time would serve him well, letting the wounds of Uncle Ben fade a little as years passed. 

You weren’t too sure about miracles or fate, but it truly felt like the clouds parted to shine a light down on his ruffled hair when he looked forward again. The sun floated down on his skin and turned his dark eyes into the warmest brown you had ever seen as they looked at you. His steps stuttered for a second before he stopped moving completely. You barely noticed his friend also stopping, looking confused at Peter, before you handed Gwen your cotton candy, and your legs began moving.

You snaked between groups of people, and he did the same, not letting anyone slow you down. Harry may have been calling your name as you left, but you didn’t look back or answer, not when Peter was mere feet away from you. You squeezed past another person before… 

It was him, standing right in front of you, his chest heaving up and down.

It was only a heartbeat or two of looking at him, really looking, before you lunged at him to wrap him in a squeezing hug, his arms holding so tight to your body like he would never let go again. The flaming anger of his absence in your life was still lit in your stomach, but the light fizzled just a little when he whispered, “You’re here, you’re here,” over and over again. 

He kept his hands wrapped around your arms when pulling back, his eyes looking you up and down as if he didn’t believe it was really you. You wanted to look away, just for a second to escape his intense gaze, but you couldn’t. He was here, and that was what mattered.

“Hi,” he breathed out, a permanent grin plastered on his face.

“Hey.”

“It’s you.” “It’s me. And, it’s you,” you laughed back, your hands gesturing up and down. 

“Wow, I…” he started but cleared his throat. “I should introduce you to my friend,” he said while turning around, but the guy he was walking with was nowhere to be found. “I guess he left.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare off your friends.” It was mostly true, but you couldn’t bring yourself to feel too guilty as you two walked back shoulder-to-shoulder to May, Gwen, and Harry. The way his skin brushed against yours felt foreign and like home at the same time, like your body discovering an old song again that brought back so many memories.

You heard May’s voice say, “Oh, that’s where she ran off to. She found the missing boy.”

A laugh tumbled from your mouth, and Gwen and Harry turned to look at you two. Harry opened his arms and patted Peter’s back, the two boys sharing a moment. When Peter finally turned to Gwen, she had her mouth pressed tight. 

“Peter Benjamin Parker, how could you not tell us you were coming to ESU?” she asked, her arms crossed over her chest. He scratched the back of his neck and mumbled some excuse, but she just laughed and welcomed him in after a second.

And you all then bombarded him, asking him where he lived, what his major was, where he’d been lately, and about his friends on campus. He easily answered all of them, except for a vague response as to why he’d been absent all the time, but you had given up on getting that out of him a while ago.

“I saw that MJ went to some out-of-state university. What was the name of it again?” Harry asked.

You saw Aunt May’s eyes cast downward as Peter let out a sharp sigh. “It was a college down in Florida, but we, um, we’re not together anymore,” he said, and your heart felt a bit weak at the way he got that glazed-over look again.

“Oh, I’m sorry, man. I didn’t mean to…” Harry trailed off, giving Peter a sympathetic look. Gwen also offered an apology, resting her hand on his arm.

He waved him off, “It’s okay. Long-distance isn’t really my deal.” 

You all stood there, and you couldn’t stand the silence that no longer felt easy and comfortable. “Well, I hope cotton candy is still your deal. It was always your favorite,” you said and offered it to him.

A simple, grateful smile passed over his face, and he ripped off a piece, dropping it into his mouth. He thanked you and said, “I’m sure your guys’ dating lives were much more successful than mine.” He gave a small laugh, and you were sure he meant well, but it just made your heart ache even more.

Harry and Gwen talked about the few people they’d dated over the years. You stood there with your attention on them but stayed quiet yourself. As Peter glanced toward you, you were sure he noticed your silence. You hadn’t found anyone out West that your heart was set on, no one there to make you smile the way…

Gwen interrupted your train of thinking and asked you about what coffee shop you all should make your hangout spot. Making small talk with her and Harry, you were thankful for her distraction, both from the dating question and from your thoughts.

You caught a glimpse of May making silent faces at Peter during the conversation, her eyes widening and mouthing something. When the correct cafe was chosen, the unoriginally named Coffee Bean near campus, Peter cleared his throat and offered, “Hey, my roommates and I got a crappy projector a couple of weeks ago, if we wanted to have a movie night or something.”

Certain your wide grin looked a bit cheesy but not caring one bit, you readily accepted, excited for a classic movie night with your childhood friends again. Gwen and Harry agreed as well, and this was where you’d usually lose hope that it would actually happen, but Peter got out his phone to look at his calendar. Right then and there, the four of you made concrete plans for next Friday night.

Glancing over to the side, you saw May looking pleased, and you knew your face couldn’t look too far off. The five of you spent most of the day together, watching the football game but really paying more attention to catching up with each other. As the day came to an end, their laughs seared into your brain once again, the group split up again as May and Gwen’s family returned home, and Harry and Peter walked back to their own apartments.

Making your way back home, you strolled with Gwen arm in arm, and your steps almost felt a bit lighter. When the door shut behind you, you said to her, “I really can’t believe he’s here.”

“I know, right? He seems like he’s pretty happy. I’m so glad the gang's back together,” she responded, taking her shoes off and putting away her things.

“It’s so nice to talk to him,” you said, taking your shoes off as well. With a sigh, you muttered, “I hadn’t heard from him in so long, though that’s my own doing, really.”

“What do you mean?”

You picked at the edge of your nails, blowing out a long breath. “I blocked him when I left two years ago and didn’t tell anyone. It’s just… It hurt being let down by him all the time, and I said my goodbye in the letter. I know it was naive to come back here and not expect to see him, but I didn’t plan on attending the same school as him!”

She had been watching you as you paced back and forth and nodded, pursing her lips. “Well, if we’re going to all be friends again, you’re going to have to clear the air with him.”

“I know,” you groaned, putting your head in your hands. You felt bad, but he had to have known why you did it. He didn’t even show up to say goodbye and always blew you off. Later that night, curled in your bed and blankets, you finally unblocked his number with a deep breath out. 

Part of you felt ready to talk to him about this and move past it, start a new era together. That part saw the way his eyes lit up when they locked on yours; it remembered how being with him felt like coming home. And as you scrolled through texts you had forced yourself to forget, the other part of you came back screaming and unwilling to be silenced. Nearly every other text was him saying he couldn’t make it to lunch or he had to skip out on plans. That part of you rolled its eyes at old jokes and memories you wanted to smile at.

Over the next week leading up to Friday, you went back and forth in your mind on what you would say to Peter. Your heart leapt into your throat every time you saw his oh-so-familiar face on campus, loving the way he smiled the second he saw you. Then, as soon as he passed, your pounding heart hardened – why couldn’t he have made this kind of effort years ago? Though you did realize he was so young then and still recovering from Uncle Ben’s murder, something you couldn’t imagine how to cope with.

But he could’ve at least talked to you. You nearly wanted to rip your hair out at this back and forth your mind went through. By the time Friday rolled around, you’d decided on staying true to your hurt feelings while being open-minded to what he had to say – determined to shoot for the middle. You just hoped your aim was good enough. 

You thought you could pull him to the side before the night started, ripping off the bandaid with a quick conversation before restarting your friendship. But when you arrived with Gwen and Peter swung open that door, his warm eyes taking you in, your mind went quiet. Everything you’d planned to say went out the window as Gwen pulled you in by your arm, your feet feeling a bit stuck under Peter’s gaze. Harry, already sat on a plush bean bag chair, yelled, “Hey! Join the party!” 

The apartment smelled of fresh popcorn, and Peter had set out a variety of snacks and drinks. You cautiously grabbed some provisions, voice quiet while the rest caught up before sitting down in the middle of the couch. Gwen sat on one side of you, Peter on the other. 

You tightened your legs together, trying to shield yourself a bit from his body, too aware of the possibility of your knee touching his and the conversation you planned to have with him soon weighing over you. You wondered if this heavy rain cloud constantly over you was over him too – if he had thought much about you these past two years.

But once everyone was settled, the room dark and ready for the movie… the four of you ended up spending almost an hour just talking and joking. You reminisced about your favorite memories, finding your muscles loosening a bit as Harry brought up the story of you guys going to the skatepark for the first time.

Peter doubled over in fits of laughter and ragged breaths, and you couldn’t help but smile along with him. As he told the story, it slowly felt easier to sit next to him again. He pointed toward you and Gwen, saying, “I forced you to come to the skatepark and finally learn, but you both ended up falling so many times, I had to give you piggyback rides back to the car.”

Giggling, you added, “And I wanted you to skate with me on your back, but you wouldn’t!”

“You would’ve never forgiven me for eating shit and landing on you,” he said, wiping a tear from the corner of his eyes.

Gwen, with her typical guffaw, said, “Then we made Peter buy us all ice cream to make up for the trauma he put us through.” She shook her head, “I’m still keeping my promise to never touch a skateboard again.”

After the laughter died down and too many stories were half-told before switching to the next, the popcorn bowl laid empty, and your ribs hurt from laughing so hard. Finally, you asked, “So, are we actually going to watch a movie?” before grabbing the remote. They agreed, but you passed over countless options, none of which could get all four of you to say yes to.

“Man, was it always this hard to pick a movie with you guys?” Harry asked, his legs laying over one side of the armrest, his head laying on the other.

Gwen responded, “No, because we were tweens and watched whatever movie was on cable at the time.” You nodded, a small grin appearing at remembering. Things sure did feel simpler then.

No one chose anything, so you said, “Okay, let’s just go with a classic. Who’s up for Ferris Bueller’s Day Off?” 

You all had seen it before, but still, everyone raised their hands, and you quickly pressed play before going to refill the large bowl with more popcorn. Ferris’s incredible opening monologue played when you sat back down, sending a few kernels flying. The four of you laughed at the aloof school secretary scenes and aww’d at Cameron’s sad pool scene. A heart-warming movie night needed a heart-warming movie, and it delivered.

And it feel just right, except for the goosebumps slowly littering your arms and legs, the A/C blowing onto your skin. Before you knew it, a soft blanket was placed on your lap, and you looked to your side to see Peter spreading it out on top of you. He whispered, “You seemed cold,” as he tucked in the ends around your legs. He left it at that as he turned back to the TV, and you hoped he didn’t see your warm cheeks despite your cold body.

Between the late hour and the comfy blanket, you had started nodding off near the end of the movie. Your eyelids kept opening and shutting during Ferris’s iconic scene of him running home before his family arrived. It was a classic, but things felt good again, and before you knew it, your body gave way to sleep.

You weren’t sure how long you had been out when your eyes blearily blinked open. The world looked fuzzy, and there was just a soft glow from the TV to light up the room. The warm blanket made you want to snuggle in further and fall back asleep, but your “pillow” shifted slightly beneath you. With a stiff neck, you raised your head and squinted to see what was disturbing your comfortable sleep.

But it wasn’t a pillow. Peter looked down at you, his soft eyes humming with kindness. His hand came up to your face, rubbing a thumb across your cheek before coming away with a stray strand of hair. You already missed the warmth of his touch, but the way he looked back at you was enough. 

You would have stared at him forever until you realized you had fallen asleep on his shoulder, and eyeing his shirt, you saw that there was a small wet spot. You whipped your head around to find the TV was playing some sitcom on mute, but captions on, and Harry and Gwen weren’t in their spots anymore.

Turning back to Peter and bringing your hands to your face, you said, “I’m so sorry. I can wash your shirt if you want. I didn’t even realize I’d fallen asleep…”

He tilted his head slightly and smiled. “You don’t have to wash my clothes. We’re at college now. I’ve had much worse on me,” he said, laughing at the way you crinkled your nose at his words. “Besides, it can be an equal trade for how adorable you looked while sleeping. Even when snoring like a trucker.”

“Hey! I do not snore like a trucker, thank you very much,” you declared, crossing your arms and hoping it somehow hid your warm cheeks and thoughts playing catch-up. Did he really think you were adorable while drooling on him? “Anyway, where did Harry and Gwen go?”

He let out a long yawn, his words coming out slow and muddled, “Oh, they went home a bit ago. It’s well past midnight.” “I was asleep for that long…?” you shook your head. You wanted to curse how comfortable Peter made you, how easy it was for him to break down these walls you had built, but as you watched the glow from the TV flicker across his face, illuminating every freckle he had, you couldn’t hate him for the way he made you feel. Though you found a soft dislike for the way your body always seemed to come back to his, like a satellite with no say in what it was programmed to revolve around.

As all of this ran through your head, Peter rested his chin on his knee, watching the way your eyes flicked back and forth, your lips moving to mouth some of the words you were thinking. It wasn’t until he called your name a few times that you looked up at him. He asked, “Are you okay?”

The sigh you slowly let out turned into a groan as you knew it had to be in this moment. It was just you two. “Peter, are we okay?” You stood up, unable to look at him or look at him looking at you while saying this. Your feet brushed against the itchy rug he had while pacing back and forth. “I just mean, there’s two years between us missing. I know it’s partly my fault, and I’m partly sorry, but I feel like there’s so much that just went unsaid.” 

As the last words left your mouth, you turned back toward him to see he was now sitting cross-legged on the couch, fully alert. He brushed his hair back and blew out a breath. “Uh, yeah. I assumed we’d have this talk at some point; guess I wasn’t expecting it right after you drooled on me.” And he smiled when that got a small giggle out of you.

He continued, his smile quickly disappearing, “I’m assuming you blocked my number not too long after you left.” If he blinked, he would’ve missed the tiny nod you gave him or the way your eyes unfocused for a second. “Being honest with you… I called every day for weeks, hell, probably a couple of months. Texted you for even longer. I read your letter too late, just an hour too late,” he said, balling his hands up and pushing them against his forehead. “I’m sorry, I should’ve been there.”

A tightness welled up in your chest, creeping up your throat as tears bubbled at the corner of your eyes. “God, I wish you had been there. I thought about what I’d say to you the whole car ride. How I’d finally give you a piece of my mind when we saw each other again…” You trailed off, head angling toward the ground.

“You thought about seeing me again?” he wondered, his body shifting forward ever so slightly, closer to you.

You scoffed. “Every lanky, brown-haired boy that came around, I just saw you for half a second,” you breathed out, fingers picking at the hem of your shirt. 

His palms rubbed repeatedly against his thighs. “Yeah, I know what you mean,” he said, letting out a long breath. He raised his hands up, his palms toward you in a surrendering position. “Let me hear the speech. I deserve every word you have to say.”

You squeezed your eyes shut, shaking your head. “I needed that time apart from you, but that’s the thing. Being away and now having you here, I don’t want to scream at you anymore. I just…” you trailed off, about to explain why you did what you did, but he nodded.

“I know. It’s okay, sweetheart,” he said, standing up from the couch to come to you, but you placed a hand out in front of you.

“No, Peter,” you said, taking a step back. “I really want to say you don’t know – that you have no clue – but maybe you do. I just, if we’re going to try again, I need you to do better this time around. Please,” you pleaded, your outstretched hand shaking.

His face flashed some sort of look you couldn’t decipher, but your racing mind didn’t help you in figuring it out. A mix of raised eyebrows, jaw slightly dropping, and eyes blinking just a bit too hard had your heart breaking. He looked down and sighed, “You’re right. I…” Pressing his mouth tight, he met your eyes for a brief second and then looked around the room. “I can’t guarantee I’ll be perfect, but I will be better. I swear.”

His words started out quiet but grew as he talked. “As long as you promise to not close yourself off and shut us out. Deal?” he asked, reaching a tentative arm out toward you.

You studied his fingers just breaths away from yours. Maybe it resembled the Creation of Adam painting, their outstretched hands nearly touching. Or maybe it looked more like a truce, a helping hand to pull you up and out… again. You focused on his rough skin as you slid your palm against his and grasped it, squeezing his hand tight and weakly shaking it. You whispered, “Deal.”

The second you said it, he pulled your arm, bringing your body close to his in one swift movement. As a squeak escaped your mouth, his arms wrapped around you, your bodies pressed tight together. “Is this okay?” he asked.

It felt strange, being so close to him again. But you couldn’t deny how much the familiar warmth of his body felt like home, and you nodded against him. He swayed with you on that ugly rug in the early morning even though you knew he was tired, and a few tears slid down your cheeks. 

If he had asked why you were crying, you doubt you could explain it, but he didn’t ask. He didn’t have to. You weren’t sure how long had passed like that, just letting his breaths raise his chest up and down against you, before a laugh came out of your mouth. He pulled back to look at you, asking, “What is it?”

You wiped your eyes with the back of your arm and said, “I’ve now soiled your shirt twice. Ugh, you make me a mess.”

“Um, pretty sure you're the one that made me a mess.”

“Oh, hush,” you said. And it was so nice to feel the rumble of his laugh so close against you as you curled into him again. 

“Stay the night?” he asked, and he must’ve felt the way your heart jumped into your throat or how your stomach twisted in on itself because he immediately followed up with, “It’s just pretty late to walk back now. You can take my bed if you want. Or– Or the couch!”

“I can take the couch as long as I get to have that blanket.” The thought of sharing the bed with him played in the back of your mind, how close you two would finally be. But you had just vomited your feelings at him and cried on him, and you needed time to let your heart settle down. 

“Of course,” he said, reassuring you that he’d leave the door open a crack in case you wanted to switch, and he began bringing out pillows, sheets, and extra pajamas in your size (though you wanted to question why he had them, they smelled just like him, so you didn’t complain). You thanked him, and when you had everything tucked into the corners and he had fluffed the pillow a bit roughly for your amusement, Peter stood just outside his room, rocking back and forth on his heels.

He placed his hand on the doorknob and stared at you. With a gentle smile, he asked in a bare whisper, “Friends again?”

Holding the pajamas close to your chest, you nodded, the edges of your eyes crinkling. “Friends again.”

His grin turned toothy and wide before wishing you a good night and walking into his room, leaving it open a few inches. You padded to the bathroom to change and get ready before snuggling into the comfortable couch. Maybe it was because Peter wasn’t next to you or because of the conversation, but your thoughts kept you from relaxing.

He really called you sweetheart… Did he usually do that to people? You didn’t think so, but it’d been two years. Maybe he’d changed. And he seemed really certain he would keep his promise this time, but how much can someone actually change? Your brain ran through a million scenarios of what might come from this night, and slowly, your mind tired itself out. You laid there on his couch, under his blanket, in his pajamas, next to him on the other side of the wall. Yeah, something had definitely changed between you two, and as you slipped into sleep, you hoped it was for the better.

                                            *

You never understood those rom-coms where the actors woke up in the morning with perfect hair and their mind immediately awake. Your first moments of waking up involved your face scrunching tight and your body curling even tighter into the sheets as small crashing noises and muffled grumbling came from somewhere. Sunlight shined through the curtainless window right into your eyes, and your body felt out of place wherever you were, but it felt too early to care.

A floorboard creaking rang out into the room, and with resistant muscles, you turned around to face the back of the couch, pulling the blanket over your head. Distantly, you heard the sound of a door closing and the shower running. Just as your body relaxed again after a few minutes, the sound of something dropping reverberated through the whole apartment. With a sigh, you were sure the downstairs neighbor didn’t appreciate it and finally sat up.

Your hands came up to rub the sleep from your eyes, blurring your vision for a few seconds. Recognizing the room, all the memories waltzed back into your mind, your stomach fluttering for a second. When you heard the shower shut off, you called out, “Peter?”

There was another crash and a “Shit!” that was certainly Peter. His voice responded faintly, “Good morning! I, um, was just showering cause I worked out. I’ll be out in a second!”

You told him, “Okay, just don’t hog the bathroom too long!” You stood up, shuffling toward the kitchen for breakfast. Thoughts ran through your head while rummaging through the fridge and cupboards; he wasn’t the kind to squeeze in an early morning workout, especially after a late night. But he did look more… filled out than the last time you’d seen him. Maybe he had changed

Though, it didn’t seem he was that different because you couldn’t find much besides energy drinks and expired food. A partially crushed box of cereal sat in the back, but they didn’t have any milk. You stuck your head back in the fridge to double check when you heard hurried steps walk past behind you.

Standing back up and turning around, you said, “Peter, do you even own actual food or��” The door to Peter’s room slammed shut with a bang, and the bathroom door was now open with steam trickling out of it. 

“Ah, didn’t mean to close it that hard! Sorry, just getting dressed,” he said with more frantic rustling coming from his room. “And no, we don’t really have food.”

You gave a small smile and shoved your hand into the box, pulling out a handful of cereal to eat. Looking around the apartment, you suddenly felt determined to help him with this place… somehow. Harry’s apartment didn’t look this much like a bachelor pad. You’d have to talk to him and Gwen about sprucing up Peter’s place, and supplying his kitchen.

Finally, the door to his bedroom opened up. Seeing Peter’s soft grin in the morning light felt different, like there was something to say — like the air itself and the small pieces of dust floating through it were yelling for something. He looked at you, laughing as your hand shoved back into the box. You raised your eyebrows at him, silently asking, “What’s so funny?” but he just weakly shook his head. “Those pajamas suit you well.”

“Suit me well?” you laughed. “What, am I a businessman trying on a new suit?”

He shuffled over and grabbed the box from you, leaving you with a hand clumping more cereal, a few pieces falling onto the floor. He shoved an excessive amount of cereal into his mouth while saying, “You know, I might’ve even said they looked cute on you. But you were sassy, so now you get treated like a businessman: ‘Give me a return on investment by 5 pm! Run it up the flagpole if you have to!’” he shouted, raising his finger into the air while giving a nearly perfect impression of J. Jonah Jameson, which left you bent over laughing. 

“Analyze the company’s big data… I think. I’ve never taken a business class,” he finished, shrugging his shoulders before cramming more cereal into his mouth.

“Peter, I think you’re the most ridiculous person I have ever met,” you said and looked into his eyes, unable to contain the smile he etched on your face. “But I’ll take the compliment.”

With a matching grin, you two went and sat in the living room, relaxing and catching up for a bit longer. You threw bits of cereal back and forth to each other, trying to catch it in your mouths. After he had effortlessly caught 15 in a row, you got up grumbling about him rigging the game and walked to the bathroom to change clothes. You folded the pajamas neatly back in a pile and helped clean up the living room when you got back out.

As you finished tidying the room and putting on your shoes, you blew out a breath and walked to the door. “Okay, well, as much as I ‘love’ dry cereal for breakfast and wearing yesterday’s clothes, I’m going to head back. Thank you again for everything,” you said and watched him walk over to you.

“Oh, yeah. No problem. Do you need me to walk you back?” he asked.

But you weren’t really listening to his question, instead watching his steps. “Hey, are you okay? It looks like you’re limping a bit.”

He stopped in his tracks, looking down at his feet and sweatpants-covered legs. “Um, that’s just from the workout. Misstepped and hurt my ankle a bit, you know? Nothing too major,” he said, his hand rubbing up and down his forearm. “Is that a no then?” Your eyes widened before saying, “Oh, right. No, it’s not too far of a walk. I’ll see you around. And rest up, okay?”

When he nodded and his face softened, his gaze never leaving you, you were happy to escape out the door. Had he always looked at you like that? You let out a long sigh while walking down the hall, your fraying nerves calming down with each step back to your apartment. 

Gwen had squeezed your hands when you told her how the conversation went, happy for the two of you and excited to have the friend group back. The four of you went to the campus cafeteria most days, ordering takeout other nights and watching more movies, playing games, or reminiscing on all the great memories shared between you. 

Some days, it was only three or two of you – classes, work, and projects taking up everyone’s time. Peter made an effort to show up, and you kept to your promise of not shutting them out anymore, slowly communicating with them more and finding some independence in making friends from other classes.

On days Peter was altogether too busy, you’d offer to bring coffee, snacks, or a late dinner to him. The guy had received a science scholarship for ESU and had already completed beginner courses in biology, chemistry, and physics while in high school, easily landing him a position as a teacher’s assistant.

When Peter’s TA responsibilities filled up his lunch hour in between labs and classes, it quickly became your favorite time to bring him something, usually a toasted bagel and coffee with way too much caffeine. It meant you had to walk through the stuffy science building, but it also meant you got to stand at the open classroom door and watch him teach the class.

The first time you did this, you leaned on the doorway as he walked around a skeleton model at the front of the room. He pointed out different joints, explaining how the tendons connected the bones and allowed the body to move. Grabbing its hand, he spun it around, pretending to dance with it. Glancing at the students, you saw their quiet laughs and genuine interest as he went into great detail about how every part of your body worked together to make this possible. 

Watching him in his element, his mind so fully present in what he was doing, made your heart flutter a little. You couldn’t help but love how attentive he was to each and every one of them… or love the way his arms and hands flexed when he gestured every which way. You weren’t sure if you had felt this way about Peter back in high school, but you chewed on your lip at the thought of some schoolgirl crush developing.

The thought solidified and sunk deep into your stomach when he finally turned your way, noticing the bag you held for him. The smile that grew on his face made a grin of your own appear. “Ah, my lunch has arrived…” he said, pointing toward you. “But first, class, what three bones make up the shoulder she’s using to lean on?”

You peered at the students, mouth feeling a bit dry at the sudden attention he’d put on you. A student toward the back raised their hand, answering, “The clavicle, scapula, and… humerus?”

Peter clapped his hands together, making you jump a little. “Correct! Now,” he said, walking over to you. He took the bagel from your grasp, tossing it perfectly onto his desk, and grabbed your hand in his. “Who can tell me what three main types of bones are in the hand?” he asked while spinning you around just as he did with the skeleton. 

You heard a student give some sort of answer that was probably correct, but your eyes were stuck on Peter’s hand slipping away from yours far too soon. Had you not been twirling in front of a class of students, you would have held on tighter and pulled back against him. Instead, you walked back to the door, waving goodbye as Peter said, “Thank you – I’ll pay you back!”

His voice carried through the hallway as he got back to human anatomy with the class. You were sure you looked like some giddy teenager skipping across the floor, but you couldn’t help how good it felt to smile because of Peter again. Your hand was still hot from his touch, and you held it close, feeling it warm against your chest.

You kept these thoughts to yourself, not sure enough of them yet to tell Gwen. Though, that didn’t stop you from running through them again and again, especially when he was busy. You found yourself lost in replaying these conversations with him when walking downtown with Gwen and Harry one afternoon. 

You had gone out to eat at a new diner, but commotion and people hurrying past you drew you toward a nearby street. As you turned the corner, you couldn’t believe the flash of red and blue you saw – your eyes finally saw the New York vigilante swinging above you. The three of you managed to catch a glimpse of Spider-Man flying through the air and over buildings to get to a car crash. You ran to catch up to him, watching the way he ripped open doors and grabbed people out, rushing them away from the crumpled vehicles.

You admired how he dove head first into the danger, risking himself for people he didn’t even know. Other people around you clapped and hollered as everyone laid safe. The excitement swelled in your chest and you couldn’t help but shout, “Way to go, Spider-Man!” with a wide grin. 

It slowly dissolved from your face when his head whipped around and he looked at you three. You stopped clapping, your hands still resting against each other as the ground began shaking beneath your feet. Your arms flew out to hold onto Harry’s arm to keep your balance, but it didn’t help as a crash rang out through the streets, and you all fell to your hands and knees. Debris fell from above, and the unknown destruction sounded muffled against your ears.

Cutting through the shrill ringing came a voice shouting to run, hide, something. There he was. Inches from your face was Spider-Man lifting you up and guiding you away from whatever caused the destruction. You grabbed Harry and Gwen’s hands and ran in the opposite direction from the car wreck. Glancing back one more time before rounding the corner, you spotted the superhero turning to fight a monstrous lizard crawling on a nearby building.

Campus thankfully wasn’t far away, so you ran back to your apartment with heaving chests. Gwen locked the door behind you, which you all knew wouldn’t do much against a supervillain, but it still felt better than nothing. As soon as you checked over each other for any injuries, you fished your phone from your pocket and called Peter, your heart beating fast but not from running. 

The phone rang, your feet pacing back and forth, back and forth. The phone kept ringing. You paced even faster. You groaned, saying, “It went to voicemail.” Your eyes caught the way Harry ran a hand through his hair once, twice, three times and the way Gwen worried her lip with her teeth as she turned on the news.

A second later, your phone buzzed, nearly making you drop it as your muscles tensed. It was a text from Peter. “Oh, okay, guys. Peter just texted,” you said, letting out a deep sigh as you scanned his message. “Turns out he’s TA’ing a class and can’t talk. Thank goodness.” You eyed your friends, and maybe it was in your head, but your body felt lighter, the air feeling easier to breathe.

It took a couple days for things to feel normal again, the news of the giant lizard man attacking the city everywhere, but thankfully Spider-Man was there to stop him for now. And you wished you could say things went back to normal with Peter as well, but your wary mind couldn’t help but notice his increasing absences since that day. Every missed movie night and unreturned call from him ate away at you. 

You saw him here and there, still dropping off food to him while he worked late in the lab. But most of the smiles he caused were over text, the bright light of your phone not nearly as warm as him. Coffee Bean did officially become guys’ hangout, but the baristas working there really only learned three of your names, as Peter rarely showed. Most of the conversations you had with him included him updating that he was okay when one of you frantically called him during another attack near campus.

You invited him to on-campus events. To movie nights. To study sessions. To anything. You really tried to not shut him out or bottle up inside, but there was only so much you could express over text. The three of you planned to say something the next time he was around… but that’d require him showing up for more than a rushed “Hello! Gotta go!” as he ran past.

Wanting to keep your promise, you at least aired your concerns with Gwen and Harry, knowing that they missed his presence too. Selfishly, you wanted him back because you loved seeing him, but part of it was a growing worry festering in your chest. A couple times when you tried to surprise him with food while he was teaching, he hadn’t been in the class when he said he was. None of you could figure out where he went.

One morning, you had felt jaded again, angry that Peter was slipping away once more – even after his promise. You’d say it happened right before your eyes, but he was rarely in front of you anymore. It felt distant, as cold as the blanket of snow built up in these cold months. Your fingers typed a long paragraph to him, using every bit of strength to pry your arms open and keep yourself from closing in on themselves. It was a rambling message full of fragment sentences and thoughts, but still, it was kind. Anger trickled down to your fingertips, but you would not let that spread into the words you wrote him and wouldn’t let them go near that block button either. More than anything, you wanted to pry him open, look him in the eyes to ask what had changed, what he wasn’t telling you.

That afternoon during one of your classes, he sent a short text. All it said was, “Sorry. Will make it up to you. Be there tonight”

A deep breath filled your lungs, pushing in so deep it began to hurt before forcing it all out in one go. You read it again and again, but the words didn’t somehow magically change by the tenth read-through. What time? Should you invite Harry over? Gwen was gone for the week visiting home – should you tell her Peter’s finally coming over? 

These thoughts ran through your head, but you left his message as it was. After class, you tried working on homework, though your mind wanted to focus on anything else. Worksheets were sloppily finished, notes on readings sparse, and essays were just mere outlines, unable to put your everything into anything with the thought of Peter hovering above you. You made dinner somewhere in there while waiting, “accidentally” making enough for two in case he came around. But as the sun dipped below the city’s skyline and bled out beautiful colors among the clouds, and the food grew cold, he was nowhere to be seen. Again.

Unable to spend much more time concentrating on school, you spent the evening scrolling through your phone, scrolling through Netflix, scrolling through channels hoping to find something to catch your attention. The news popped up during your searching. It showed breaking live footage of another battle between Spider-Man and the monster he’d been facing, The Lizard. Knowing Gwen was far away and safe, you texted Peter and Harry for their update. Harry quickly answered, saying he was hanging out with his roommate in his apartment. Peter never answered.

You reassured yourself this was how he usually was lately and that he was okay. The phone laid next to your lap in case he texted back as you watched a recent scene of the events: Spider-Man being tossed against a building, his body smashing through brick and window with a loud crash and screams ringing in the background.

Everything in you winced at the footage, your shoulders leaning forward as you inched to the edge of the seat, waiting with bated breath for him to reappear. A web shot from the hole and wrapped itself around the monster, Spider-Man flying out with a ripped suit and limping movements. He landed one hit after another. They went back and forth, and as your leg began shaking more and your palms felt sweatier, you had to turn the TV off before it freaked you out too much.

You tried to focus on something else, but as your thoughts meandered from the news, they instead drifted back to Peter. The promise you made yourself in the car years ago to never let him make you feel this way again was splintering into cracks, threatening to break altogether. You dug your nails into your palm, leaving crescent marks into your skin. In the back of your mind, you thought of Aunt May. What would she do right now? With that, you got up, making your way to the kitchen for a late-night snack and distraction.

The apartment soon filled with pans clanging, and billowing clouds of flour puffed into the air. Soon, after everything was mixed, you poured the batter into a pan, the bubbling and sizzling wafting to your ears. The chaos of the kitchen almost made you miss a knocking sound. It wasn’t until you heard your name frantically called that you realized it was Peter’s voice. Glancing at the clock, you saw how late it’d gotten. With a sigh, trying not to burn the place down, you called out, “Peter, I don’t really want to talk right now.”

The tapping grew louder, and you realized he was knocking against your window. You looked toward it, seeing a shadowy figure lying against the glass. Quickly removing the pan from the stove and turning it off, you ran to the fire escape. The second you saw through the reflection, your feet stumbled below you, your body coming to an abrupt stop. Fingers wrapped in red and blue pulled the window open before he nearly flopped inside your apartment. A duffle bag fell with him, a pair of high tops tied together around the straps by their shoelaces.

A rush of cold air drifted into the apartment while he laid on the floor, his hands rising up and down on his chest – a chest covered by Spider-Man’s logo. His mask was off, and there was no mistaking that tangled mess of hair. He let out a small laugh, then groaned at movement. “Are you making wheat cakes?”

“Peter… I,” you started, your mouth not keeping up with your racing mind.

“I am starving. Could you bring me some? And maybe some syrup,” he coughed out, lolling his head to the side with deep breaths. Snowflakes that had been resting on him shimmered to the floor when he turned.

“Are you okay?” You winced, your eyes shutting for a moment before saying, “Sorry, dumb question. Should I grab the first aid kit?”

He lifted himself onto his elbow, turning to look at you. “Uh, yeah. That’d probably be a good idea, after bringing some wheat cakes first, though.”

Your legs moved under you to first close the window to keep him warm and safe, then toward the bathroom to grab all the supplies. Your brain simply went through a checklist of everything you desperately needed, leaving no room for questioning what Peter had just unveiled to you. You passed the kitchen on the way back, quickly grabbing a plate of wheat cakes as you sprinted by. Maybe it would help him heal and restore his energy, or maybe you just knew it’d make him happy.

He shoved his bag to the side and crawled up onto the couch, remembering to grab a blanket and put it under him to not damage the couch. With stiff arms, he unclasped the suit top from the bottoms, trying to rid the tight shirt from his body. You came back, setting the kit and plate on the table to help him take it off. He lifted his upper half, letting you slowly pull it up his back and over his head. 

A hard swallow forced itself down your throat as you saw him. Deep purple bruises bloomed all along his body, especially his ribs. A long gash curled from his stomach and around to his lower back. As you let out a shaky breath, Peter asked, “That bad, huh?”

“Well, it’s not great,” you said, your eyes never leaving the wound. “Do you know how to stitch yourself up?”

His eyes looked to yours, weakly blinking. “Yeah, but I’m not sure–”

“Can you teach me? Coach me through it, and I’ll stitch this thing closed for you.” You opened up the kit, so god damn thankful Gwen got one with suturing supplies – encouraged by her police officer father. 

Before doing anything else, you sanitized your hands and grabbed a washcloth, running it under water with a little bit of soap. You brought it back to him, looking at his pained face and wanting to cry. You instead sucked in a breath and said, “I’ll help shift you onto your side. Ready?”

He nodded, digging his teeth into his lip as the two of you maneuvered him on his side to face you, the wound exposed upward to the heavens. You gave him one hand to hold onto yours and began dabbing the washcloth on the wound to clean it out. 

He seethed, every breath in or out sharp and abrupt. “I’m so sorry. I’m almost done with this part,” you told him.

You felt his thumb rub your hand. Your eyes flicked to his for a moment as he repeated, “It’s okay, it’s okay” every time you touched the cloth to his skin.

Blinking a few times, you shook your head. He was comforting you? And he’s Spider-Man? Your mind was reeling, but you just turned back to the first aid kit, pulling away from him. 

Peter pointed to the needle you needed, and you threaded it. With shaking fingers, he pointed to where you should insert the needle, where it should exit, and how to tie off the knot. 

You nodded, trying to memorize every instruction he told you. Still, while staring at the cut and shivering at the thought of the claws that caused it, your movements felt uncertain. You moved the needle toward his skin, but your hands were uneven and unable to keep still. As you closed your eyes and let out a long breath, everything felt like it was crumbling, and it was a Monday night. You couldn’t believe this disaster wasn’t on Tuesday.

“Peter, wait, now I’m not sure. This is insane. You’ve been gored by a lizard man! I don’t have the necessary medical training to heal Spider-Man! I’m going to throw up, or pass out. I’m not sure which. I…”

Your rambling trailed off as you felt Peter’s hand close around yours. He squeezed it and moved it toward the starting stitch. “Look at me,” he rasped. Any weakness he seemed to have disappeared when your eyes connected, a tired smile gracing his face. “I’m right here. You’re doing great.”

“I could accidentally kill you!”

“You’re not going to kill me. Please, just do it quickly,” he pleaded.

You brought your hands away from his, pushing the back of them against your head with your eyes squeezed shut tight. Pounding loud in your chest, your heart thrummed through your whole body, all the way to your vibrating fingers. Tears began to peak at the edges of your eyes as you said, “I shouldn’t be the one doing this. Why not go to Harry? Or May? Oh, I wish she were here. I’m not good enough to do this, Pe–”

His hands grabbed the sides of your face, forcing you to look at him. “I love you.”

Your eyes opened to find him staring at – into – you, no joking or laughing anywhere on his face. Instead of a million thoughts bouncing around in your brain, it settled into nothing as you studied the specks in his warm eyes. You weren’t sure if your heart was speeding up or slowing down as your mouth opened to yell at him for making such a confession at this time, but he brought your hand down to his side and pushed the needle into his skin with a sharp breath.

“Oh my god, oh my god,” you repeated with no choice but to stitch him up all the way now.

His body tensed with each pointed stitch, but he kept your mind from twisting itself into a nasty knot again. “Keep going; it’s okay. God, I’m so glad you’re okay.” His gaze was trained on the wall behind you, though you wished he was watching your sutures. He breathed out a long sigh and said, “That day the three of you nearly got hurt downtown when The Lizard attacked… In that split second, I thought you were all going to die, and I wouldn’t be able to save you. Me, the superhero.”

“Peter.”

“I couldn’t let that happen. Not after Uncle Ben,” he sighed, his breaths becoming more ragged. “After that day, I came back here every night to make sure you were alright.”

“Peter. It’s okay,” you told him, eyes trained on his for a second before returning to the injury. “We’re okay.”

You heard him sniffle a bit, and you knew it wasn’t from the stitches. As you tied off the last knot, you examined your work. Though his wound was closed with uneven sutures, it would hold. You whispered, “It’s all done.” 

You disposed of the dirtied supplies, coming back to bandage him with clean hands. He wrapped his arm around your shoulder to lift him into a sitting position, his throat rumbling with a strained groan. You grabbed gauze and spun it around and around his torso, making sure it fit well. 

Collapsing into the couch next to him, you pressed your forehead against his, your body sighing into him. You tried ignoring how warm and hard his chest felt rising up and down against you. “Please tell me that was the worst one.”

He gave a small laugh. “God, I hope that was the worst one.” 

You stood up, ignoring his whine of protest with a pained heart. Searching for clothes, you found a stray shirt and pants to fit him. You grabbed ice packs and water on the way back and syrup for his now-cold wheat cakes. “Okay, arms up,” you ordered, putting his arms and head into the shirt with gentle movements.

“Now let’s get you into something looser than skinny jeans,” you said. You laughed at how tight the suit was, but your laughs quickly turned to grunts as you struggled to peel the pants off of him without hurting him.

After a minute or so, they finally released the poor boy’s legs. You gently moved his lower half this way and that, checking for anything needing immediate attention. In finding nothing but bruises and light scrapes, you helped him into pants that allowed a bit more breathing room.

You laid some ice packs on the most bruised parts of his body, your attention away from his movements. When everything sat in the right place, you looked at his face to find him stuffing his mouth full of room-temperature wheat cakes with no syrup. 

With a full mouth, he said, “These are so good; May taught you well.” He swallowed and motioned his head toward the bag he brought in with him. “Speaking of May, I can’t have her seeing me like this or my roommates. So I shoved some clothes and a toothbrush in a bag. Could I crash here for a couple days? I know Gwen’s gone for the week. Oh, and I forgot toothpaste. Could I borrow some?”

You laughed at his messy mumbling. “How’d you know Gwen was gone? Spider-Man is a stalker, I see,” you teased. “But yes and yes. I can’t believe you packed an overnight bag while bleeding out.”

“I wasn’t bleeding out. ‘Tis but a flesh wound,” he laughed but quickly groaned as the movement pulled at his stitches. “An annoying flesh wound though.”

Shaking your head, you sat on the edge of the couch next to him, letting his body lean into yours. Your fingers came up to brush his sweat-soaked hair out of his face. “Hey Peter…” you said.

He hummed in response around the food. 

“You really should’ve told us about this.”

You weren’t sure you’d ever heard a gulp as audible as his, his head slowly turning to look at you. Grabbing the water from the end table, you gave it to him and watched how he downed the whole thing in one go before setting it on the floor.

He let out a deep breath and said, “I know.” With all his strength, he pushed himself back up to stare eye-to-eye with you. “Though, I really hope you can understand why I didn’t at first.”

You nodded, your fingers fidgeting in your lap. “I do.”

A hand came up to rub across his grimy face. “I was just so mad at the world for what happened to Ben, mad at myself. And by the time I picked my head up out of my ass, you were gone. I’m sorry.”

Bringing him in for a hug, you whispered, “I hope you’ve forgiven yourself, Peter. You deserve it.” You rubbed your hand along his back and felt his head loll against your neck, his mouth letting out a content sigh. “We are absolutely not done with this conversation. Though, we really have to get you to bed.”

You cleaned up everything Spider-Man–related into his bag and lifted him up as well as you could. The laces on his shoes unraveled, the high tops clattering to the floor. You were about to pick them up when Peter sleepily whined, pushing the two of you toward your room. Using enough of your strength to hold him and the bag, you left the shoes and shuffled across the apartment one slow foot at a time. His body wanted to simply fall onto the bed, but you let him down gently and pulled the sheets over him. Making sure he was settled first, you stood up to walk out of the room. 

“Wait,” he said, his voice coming out barely above a whisper. “I’m not letting my best nurse sleep on the couch I bled on. Stay with me,” he pleaded with a hand reaching out toward yours.

A smile grew across your face. “I wouldn’t dream of it. I’m just going to refill your water,” you told him. 

You threw the dirtied blanket into the washing machine and quickly brought back a full glass, your chest feeling an ache as soon as your bodies were apart. When you came back, you gingerly settled into the bed next to him, careful as to not bump into any of his injuries. He seemed much less caring as he threw a sore arm over your body and pulled you in close. 

“Thank you,” he breathed. “For everything.” 

Finally, after a night that would not let either of you rest, his body relaxed against yours. You were sure being this close to him would freak you out, keeping your mind awake for hours. But feeling his heart beat against your body and his hand rest along your skin– and the life-threatening situation he brought through your window – you quickly grew tired. His breathing deepened, and you whispered a final, “I love you too” before drifting in and out of sleep in his arms. 

                                           *

Normally, it would be your blaring alarm or students talking unnecessarily loud in the hallways, but today, it was the sound of a key clicking into the apartment lock and the door creaking open that your mind was first aware of that morning. You sleepily blinked your eyes open once, ready to pull the covers over your head and stay there forever. It was when Peter’s nose nuzzled into the back of your neck that you shot up in bed.

Gwen was here.

He groaned next to you, mumbling, “What is it?” He sleepily grumbled other words, but you couldn’t make it out as you slapped a hand over his mouth. Your eyes glanced around the room at the various pieces of Peter’s suit and looked over at his body clad in your clothes. With wildly disheveled hair and raised eyebrows, he looked between your hand on his face and your eyes. You couldn’t imagine how you looked or what Gwen would think of Spider-Man or Peter in your bed.

She must’ve heard your guys’ movements because she quietly called your name, and three gentle knocks tapped against your door. Thankfully, Peter had finally caught on and rushed to sit up and grab his things. But as his body stretched, the stitches on his no-longer-forgotten wound pulled against his skin. He shoved his face into his arm, stifling his groan as best as he could. Nearly forgetting about Gwen, you were about to go take care of Peter when she knocked again, her voice drifting through the door. 

“Are you up?”

Peter waved his hand for you to keep moving as he gently flopped back on the bed to breathe for a few seconds. You called out, “Yeah, be right there!” as you threw on a sweatshirt and kicked his suit and anything red or blue under your bed. You straightened out yourself, trying to make yourself look somewhat presentable before looking back at Peter. He had stood up, fingers resting against his injured side while leaning against the wall. 

For a brief moment, you just watched the way sunlight drifted in on his body. His hair flopped almost over his eyes, the warm brown of them feeling like home. He cracked a smile, and you hoped he was thinking about you the same way you thought of him, like as long as he was here, it would be alright. You finally broke from the trance he always had you under when he mouthed, “Go!” while shifting close to your closet, out of the way of the view from the door.

Letting out a quick breath, you brought your hand to the doorknob and inched it open, poking just your top half out. Your eyes squinted at the bright hallway, not that Gwen’s platinum hair and her even whiter smile helped. “Oh, sorry! Did I wake you up?” she asked.

“No, I was just relaxing in bed before starting the day,” you lied. “What are you doing back?”

She rolled her eyes and let out a long groan. “It’s been a real shit show, and a long story. My professor won’t let me take my class online because… I don’t even know why. So I said I’d come back today just for this class before going back home again,” she huffed out and rubbed a hand over her face. “Anyway, he said we need our laptops today, and I forgot my charger. Well, Simon took it out of my backpack without telling me, so… Would I be able to borrow yours for class? I’m sorry, do you need yours at the moment?”

You bit your lip, thinking. “No, my classes aren’t until a bit later. I’ll grab it for you.”

She grabbed your hand that wasn’t tight on the door knob while saying, “Oh, you’re a lifesaver. Thank you!”

Normally, you would just leave the door open, and she’d walk into your room. You slowly nodded, saying with an unsure smile, “Do you mind just staying here for a second? It’s a real mess that you don’t need to look at while I’m searching for the charger.”

Letting out a loud laugh, she said, “Since when do I judge for a slightly messy room? Actually, don’t answer that. But you know I don’t care that much.”

“I’m just a bit embarrassed about it,” you told her, pressing your mouth into a tight line. Your hand stayed on the door, not budging it open even though your heart beat too fast at lying to Gwen.

For a few seconds, her eyes widened and she cocked her head. You were afraid you’d made her worried for your health until a sly smile grew across her face. “Wait a second,” she said, her voice then dropping to a whisper. “Do you have someone in there?” Her voice carried a wave of excitement as she wiggled her eyebrows at you.

Your mouth opened and closed, and again. You looked back into the room, eyes searching for Peter, but he must have stuffed his poor body into the closet. Letting out a sigh, you said in a hushed tone, “Okay, yes. I brought back a guy, but he’s still sleeping.” 

Gwen let out a tiny squeal, “On a Monday night? You jezebel!”

You hushed her with a grin. “Please don’t embarrass me. If this goes well, maybe I’ll even get to introduce him to you guys. Now let me go get my charger!” you laughed out.

Shutting the door, you nearly stumbled back from it toward your desk where your charger would usually be, but it wasn’t there. As you glanced around the room for it, you turned your head at hearing the smallest clearing of the throat. Peter was indeed standing in the closet, but his hand was outstretched, holding your charger for you. He whispered, “I’m so sorry.”

You mouthed, “It’s okay,” before snatching it from him and returning to the door. You cracked it open just a little and said, “Okay, Gwen. Here it is.”

She stood up on her tippy toes, eyes searching for the mystery man inside your room but returned to the heels of her feet with a huff. Grabbing the charger, she pointed a finger at you. “You are telling me everything when I get back from class.”

You promised her you would before waving goodbye and shutting the door, the sound of her steps growing quieter joining your shallow breaths. The weak wood thudded when you dropped your head back against it, your hands rubbing down your face. When you finally looked up again, ready to face the dreary clouds of the situation you’d found yourself in, you instead opened your eyes to see the most beautiful sunshine ever as Peter stepped a few inches from your face. 

His hands wrapped around yours, bringing them to his mouth. Keeping his gaze on you, he kissed each of your knuckles with such tenderness, it made your heart sigh with happiness. “Thank you for that,” he said, letting out an airy laugh.

He brought his forehead down to yours, resting it there as your bodies just swayed together, taking in the moment of being so close to him. He breathed out, “You know, I wasn’t kidding about yesterday.” His throat bobbed with a hard swallow, his chest heaving a bit higher with each inhale as you felt his heart pound a bit faster. “I do love you.”

You squeezed your eyes shut, not wanting to hold his gaze while he laid his heart so open and bare. The moment that had just felt silly and carefree shattered, the broken mirage reminding you of yet another disappointment. With Gwen now gone, you could have talked normally, shouted at him about the way he kept fading away from you, but your voice stayed quiet. “Peter,” you whispered with a shaky breath.

Before your heart got away from you, you forced your body to steel any nerves and look him in the eyes despite your fluttering stomach. Your teeth dug into your lip to keep growing tears at bay. “...Peter, I don’t know if I have another chance in me. I can’t handle the secrets and going days without knowing if you’re even alive.”

You might as well have told him you hated him and would never love him back with the way his face dropped. His throat bobbed as his mouth pressed into a tight line. “I promise there aren’t any more secrets. I’ll tell you anything you want to know, I swear,” he said, begged, as his hands came up to your face.

But you turned your head to avoid his touch. A weak sob broke through your resolve as you said, “You promised before, Peter. I need to know this is different… because we’re different. I can’t risk a broken heart on top of losing you.”

His whole body stilled for just a moment, the air around you two freezing, before his movements exploded. He nodded feverishly, looking around the room for something, anything he could show that he could prove to you. He dug under the bed and grabbed his Spider-Man mask, his fingers gripping hard into the fabric. “I swear, if I start to drift away again or let you think for even a second that you don’t deserve the whole world, I will give it up. I won’t be Spider-Man anymore.”

Your fists balled into themselves. “You can’t do that. These people need Spider-Man. They need you.”

“I don’t care. Not if you don’t need me too.” His words might as well have been hands clasped together in a desperate plea, a prayer for you to take this risk with him. It was when he slowly shifted down onto one knee and then the other, his fingers coming to his side with a soft groan. In a second, he forgot about his injury and reached his arms out wide, offering his entire being to you. “I love you.”

He looked like an angel, his arms spread open like wings being bathed in the morning sunlight behind him. A laughing sort of scoff escaped your mouth, but nothing was funny. His doe eyes stared up at you as he was ready to give up everything just so he wouldn’t disappoint you again. 

Even though your stomach felt uneasy, from nerves or maybe elation, and your thoughts wanted to race, analyze his words and intentions and meaning and, and… you knew one thing without having to think about it. 

“I love you too, Peter.”

He released a breathy laugh, his hands slowly dropping back to his sides. You helped him back up to his feet. His fingers reached for your own as he buried his face into the crook of your neck. Against your skin, he mumbled, “Yeah? You mean it?”

You couldn’t control the wide smile growing across your face. “I love you so much, Peter.” Happy, emotional tears pricked at the edges of your eyes, a laugh-cry shaking your shoulders. 

He pulled back, his eyes looking just as watery. “I’d be lost without you,” he said, bringing his hands around to your back, pulling you tight against him. “You were always there for me, guiding me through life like a star since that day in biology. I know I haven’t always been there for you, but I promise that’s done,” he told you.

With a sheepish smile, he said, “Though maybe I should make that promise after this demon lizard is taken care of…” 

For once, as you hugged Peter like you would never let him go again, you believed him. “Like a star, you say?” you asked.

“Yep, the brightest and nicest and most beautiful shining star there is,” he said, nodding against your face.

“You know, I always thought of you as the sun, always lighting up my life whenever you were in it,” you told him. Your breath hitched just a bit as he pressed small kisses against your cheek. “It’s you and me. The sun and the star.”

“I love that. Together, we’re unstoppable. The best couple there is, clearly,” he bragged, making you laugh but also swoon at him already calling you a couple. He continued, “Though the sun is a star, so maybe we need to clarify that to people.”

Your mouth pressed in a tight line, pulling back to look at him. “Peter?” you asked with raised eyebrows.

“Yeah?”

“Don’t ruin the moment.”

He mouthed a giggly “sorry.” His nose nudged against you, and the smile ran away from his face as he said, “I’m so sorry for not being there for you. I swear, I’m going to make it up to you every day of my life. Starting now.” 

You were content to let him make it up to you by staying in his embrace for as long as possible, leaving the world outside for a bit. But with his hands still resting at your lower back, his eyes gave an unreadable expression – until they glanced to your lips and back. Shuffling his feet forward, he pressed your bodies even tighter. He brought one hand up to your face, rubbing his thumb back and forth across your cheek, and you couldn’t help but lean into his warm palm, humming.

In barely a whisper of words, he asked, “Can I kiss you?”

Unable to control the happiness and nerves bubbling in your chest, you instantly breathed out, “Yes, Peter. Please.”

The widest grin you’d ever seen permanently attached itself to Peter’s face as he leaned in, so incredibly slowly. His mouth rested right in front of yours, begging you to make the move. You nearly did, body wound tight enough to lunge forward at him, when you heard the sound of the front door opening and closing again. 

Gwen’s voice carried through the apartment as she said, “Just came back for my water bottle. Be safe, kids!” A loud giggle came from the kitchen, making you laugh as well. But just as you thought she would finally leave, she called your name again.

Letting out a long groan, you brought your forehead against Peter’s before yelling, “Yeah?”

“What are Peter’s shoes doing here?” she called back. Your head shot up, wide eyes staring at Peter, who matched your expression. You had forgotten about the shoes… The two of you opened your mouths, stuttering as you tried to come up with some believable excuse.

But then you heard Gwen let out a deep gasp, and you both flinched at the noise. Your bodies then scrambled when you heard her shoes stomp toward your room, but you locked it right before they stepped in front of the door.

“Unlock this door!” she said while pulling at the handle.

“Gwen, I am not going to open that door. And you have class you don’t want to miss,” you said, chewing on the inside of your mouth, eyes locked on the doorknob.

She eventually stopped trying to break your door down and said, “Fine, but we are so talking about this when I get back.” You agreed, and her steps began to turn away when she called out, “See you later, Peter!”

Before you could do anything, the boy behind you shouted, “Bye Gwen!” You turned on him with wide eyes and your jaw jutting out. Gwen started laughing uncontrollably, making Peter squeeze his eyes shut and clamp a hand over his mouth. Her giggling soon retreated as the front door opened and closed. 

You sighed out, fingers rubbing the bridge of your nose. “Peter…”

He brought his hand from his face, saying, “I know. But they were going to figure it out one way or another. There’s no keeping Gwen from sleuthing.”

You knew he was right but still shook your head. “Yeah, at least we can control when they find out about your secret double life,” you laughed out. “Though now she thinks we slept together and I lied to her about it,” you said, moving to lightly whack his arm, but with quick reflexes, he caught your hand and pulled your body close to his. 

He wiggled his eyebrows up and down. “We could sleep together, and then it would be less of a lie. I think,” he said, trailing off and placing your hands behind his neck before letting go.

“I’m not sure that math checks out, bug boy.”

“I am not a bug boy.”

“Either way, webhead,” you said, feathering your fingers through his hair, pressing your body even closer. “How are we supposed to sleep together when we haven’t even kissed yet?” you said, purposely fluttering your eyelashes at him.

He brought his head to yours, his lips right in front of yours again, saying, “You are going to be the death of me, you know that?” His hands moved to the sides of your face, his fingers brushing along the column of your neck. 

In an instant, your mind wanted to run away with every “What if” there was. What if this ruined your friendship? What if this changed everything with Gwen and Harry too? What if he didn’t keep his promise? What if…

As his lips pressed against yours, it all went silent, your heart soaring through the air, ready to take this leap of faith with him. And God, you finally wanted to. His arms held on tight to your body, like having an inch between your bodies would let you disappear. You got lost in his soft mouth and the daze he put you under until he deepened the kiss, pushing the air from your lungs, and you could have sworn your legs were working a second ago. Thank goodness his hands moved toward your hips, his palms snaking around to hold your weight. A yelp squeaked from your mouth as his fingers pressed into your flesh and hoisted you into the air. 

You held onto him, his muscles tight against your body as he flopped back onto your bed, your body on top of his. You laughed against his lips, “You were just on your knees moaning and groaning about your injury. Now you’re all fine to lift me like it’s nothing?”

He smiled up at you, and you knew that you wanted to see that lovestruck grin on his face every day. “I was being dramatic to make you feel bad for me. Did it work, sweetheart?”

The way his mouth curled around the word sweetheart maybe should have sounded suggestive, but it brushed over your skin with such tenderness, wrapping you in with its softness. You leaned your head down to his, watching the way he stared at your lips. Finally giving in, you laid against him, kissing again and again and again, your heart not quite believing this wasn’t a dream.

You pulled away, breaths mingling together and resting your head against his cheek. You blinked your eyes open and cocked your head slightly to the side. “Hey, Peter.”

His eyes were still gently closed and his face nuzzling into yours, unable to bear being apart from your mouth for long. Against your lips, he muttered, “Hmm?”

Your hands came to his jaw, your thumb rubbing along the bone in smooth waves. “What day is it?”

He took a second to think, like his mind was anywhere but what god damn day it was when you were right here. His brain caught up after a moment, him mumbling, “Uh, Tuesday, I think.”

His eyes finally opened, staring into yours like it was the last thing he’d ever see, the one thing keeping him alive. Every blink he took, missing your face for even a heartbeat, was a shock to his body he never wanted to feel again. And he wouldn’t have to. A grin grew on your face, and you knew it was no match for the breath of fresh air, the sunshine of his smile. Smiling like he used every bit of his heart to do. 

You quietly thanked the universe for working in these wonderfully mysterious ways. As you brought his face back to yours, you couldn’t wait to spend every Tuesday and the rest of your life with Peter.

@enaraism​

[batlingsstuff]

|| DREAM SMP HEADCANONS ||

✧─── ･ ｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

hello! this is my first time doing headcanons, and i just want to clarify some things:

sadly, i won't be doing requests because i'm busy af with school and i dont want to dissapoint anyone, but you can drop some suggestions and i would think about it! it would be really nice :)

also i won't be writing romantic headcanons for minors or those who are uncomfortable with it, but i can do platonic headcanons for them! ^^

i won't be doing nsfw headcanons either, because i'm uncomfy with sexualizing real people and just writing nsfw in general :)

also, please tell me if someone is uncomfortable with fanfics and/or headcanons and i will erase that part as fast as possible, thanks for passing by! - batling

✦ means platonic

✦ characters : ranboo, tubbo, tommy, philza, techno and jschlatt

♥ means romantic

♥ characters: quackity, wilbur, nihachu, dream, george, sapnap, eret, karl, fundy and bbh

keywords:

(y/n) : your name

(n/n) : nickname

(p/p) : pizza place

✧─── ･ ｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

“As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.” – John Green

┌────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┐

SLEEPOVERS

---

GENDER NEUTRAL

└────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┘

♥ Quackity

oh boy

i just have two words for this one: pure chaos

he will punch you with a pillow if you try to sleep

and you will be MAD at this

grabbing a pillow and hitting him RIGHT IN THE FACE with all your strenght

he'll probably fake cry about it, saying that you hurt him

after a while of pillow fighting, you guys got tired and plopped into the bed, snuggling into eachother and just enyoing the comfortable silence before drifting to sleep

♥ Wilbur

you two will probably blast hamilton and scream the lyrics till the neighbours wake up and you get angry knocks at your door

and you will laugh at that, lowering the speaker's volume and telling him to lower his voice aswell to avoid your neighbours calling the police

then you'll eat snacks and talk about anything that pops into your mind, laughing at the most silly jokes

he will sing sweet songs to you, making you fall asleep to his calming voice

summary: fluff

♥ Nihachu

you and her will bake pastries at a very late hour

she REALLY enjoys baking with you bc she thinks it's a great way to spend time with you

all this girl wants is to spend her time by your side, doing particularlly anything like streaming, baking, playing games and going outside for a walk and/or shopping

once you finished baking, she will kiss your cheek multiple times. that's her way to tell you that you did a great job :)

you'll spend the rest of the night cuddling, eating your pastries and watching some random movie, commenting about how bad it is and laughing

♥ Dream

bruh

this bitch will speedrun the sleepover

is it possible to speedrun a sleepover? maybe

you'll spend the rest of the night probably playing uncharted 3: drake's deception in his old ps3

after a while, you guys got bored from uncharted and went to his pc to play amnesia: the dark descent

there are 2 options:

you will be scared as fuck and will avoid looking at the screen when you think something bad will happen or when some body will come out from a drawer

or you will be totally chill with it, laughing hard when clay pisses his pants for real when he encounters the gatherer

you named the gatherer 'bob' :)

♥ George

he'll take you to the rooftop

and pushes you so you fall to your death

i mean

he gets blankets and pillows so you can stargaze together

he'll teach you the constelations while pointing them, excited about every single one of them

"look (y/n), that's the ursa major!"

he'll have hot chocolate prepared too, so you don't get cold while stargazing

you try your best to not fall asleep on the rooftop

but eventually fail

when he notices you're asleep, he stops talking about the constellations and carries you to your bedroom, giving you a goodnight kiss and leaving you in your bed so you can have a peaceful rest

♥ Sapnap

hey mamas

i don't know what sapnap will do in a sleepover so i will just improvise B)

you will watch anime together

not any kind of anime, like that romance-comedy bullcrap

no fuck that

you will watch the classy angsty anime like madoka magica

WATCH IT IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY

you will fucking cry because of literally anything that happens to the characters

"(y/n) why are you crying it's just a show"

'IT'S NOT ANY SHOW SAPNAP IT'S FUCKING MADOKA MAGICA OF COURSE I'M GOING TO CRY'

the last chapter made you fucking cry harder

AUTHOR HERE I WAS CRYING SO MUCH WHEN IT ENDED

yeah you will basically watch anime with him, cry about it and he will comfort you and bring you a glass of water so you don't have a terrible headache after it

I KNOW THIS HEADCANON SUCKED I'M SO SORRY

♥ Eret

KINGG <3

you two will plan a picnic in your yard

yes your yard

he'll bring a ton of snacks and you'll buy a few drinks

you two spend the rest of the picnic talking about your future and enjoying the snacks

then, he'll make you stand up and will teach you how to dance tango

and of course you will mess everything up

and you even stomped on his feet accidentally, making him wimper

but he brushed off the pain and laughed at your concerned face

after calming down his laughter, he gave you a passionate kiss and hugged you tightly

i love eret ok

♥ Karl Jacobs

this man.

this man is the definition of sweet

you'll spend the night cuddling and making cute pet names for eachother

he will definetely give you a great back massage if you're stressed

then he'll start writing love letters full of things he adore of you

and you'll do the same for him

after that, you will share your letters and just snuggle and smile at the sweet things you guys wrote for eachother

he will deffo shower you with kisses when he finishes reading your letter, telling you that you're the nicest person on earth

and that he loves you so so much

♥ Fundy

i'm a huge fundy simp ok

he will bring his piano to your house and you guys will compose a melody together

he will let you sit on his lap while you play the piano/keyboard with him

fundy will basically teach you how to play basic piano songs

you asked him if you guys could play megalovania together

he said no :(

but still you got to play nice songs together without messing up

and when you got the hang of it, he snuggled his face in your neck and kissed you there genly

and when you got tired, he started playing very calming songs and you fell asleep in his lap, snuggling into his chest

he gently carried to your room and will sleep beside you putting a fair distance so you can have a comfortable sleep!

♥ BadBoyHalo

bbh supremacy

he will get rat ready so you can snuggle with her too :)

you guys will mainly play with rat and talk about life in general

he will call you tons of cute pet names

ofc he will call you muffin it's bbh who we're talking about

he will talk about how bad he wants to spend the rest of his life with you

after a while, he will take you to his kitchen and start making muffins together

he will guide you on how to bake 'em though

you guys had a great time making muffins and cuddling with him and rat :)

══════ ∘◦❀◦∘ ══════

✦ Ranboo

tall mf gives the best piggy back rides

when he gets to your house there is a 100% chance he will bump his head on the door frame

and there is a 100% chance you will make fun of him because of that

"(y/n) please stop laughing my head hurts :("

you'll give him some ice to put on his head while you two play minecraft on your ps4

you will bring snacks too and ask him if his head is better

"yeah, thank you (n/n)"

he will pull you in a hug so you can be comfy together while you play good ol' minecraft

because ranboo surely doesn't play anything besides fucking minecraft

stfu that video of him playing spooky's jump scare mansion doesn't exist

✦ Tubbo

SWEET BE BOYY <3

he will gift you a bee plushie

expect a lot of (FRIENDLY) hugs from him

like fundy, you guys will play piano together

you guys are most likely to prank call some random numbers AND your friends

and you accidentally called some random pizza place

"hello! this is (p/p), may i take your order?"

you were nervous and didn't know what to say

UNTIL YOU CAME UP WITH A GREAT IDEA

"hello? are you there?"

'hi yes, i would like to order 7 extra large pepperoni pizzas to (tommy's adress).'

"oh- okay! uhm- they will arrive in a few hours. are you okay with that?"

'yes ma'am, thank you.'

when you ended the call, you couldn't help but burst out laughing, knowing that tommy will be so mad at you guys-

✦ Tommy

like quackity, PURE. CHAOS.

you guys will obviously stream your sleepover

doing a q&a stream :)

tubbo and wilbur will probably crash your stream and start spamming things like 'MEETUP??' and 'DIDN'T GET AN INVITE'

you guys laughed and added them to the call

"WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU GUYS INVITE ME?" wilbur shouted

'i'm sorry willlll'

you kept playing minecraft with wilbur, tubbo and quackity too since he crashed your stream like an hour later

after the stream, you got up and plopped on the mattress that was on the floor

"tired?"

'yeah'

"okay, good night big (initial)"

✦ Philza

POG

YEAHHH SLEEPOVER WITH THE MINECRAFT GOD

AND KRISTIN'S THERE TOO :)))

and oh god you ADORE kristin

i'm pretty sure she's a total sweetheart

it would be like having a sleepover with your parents

only that it's less boring

you guys will watch a movie together, you will be in one side of the couch eating snacks while phil and kristin are in the other cuddling

you'll eventually bug them about it

after the movie, you fell asleep early and philza noticed, talking to kristin about it too

and wrapped a blanket around you so that you get a good rest :)

✦ Technoblade

mr. blood god teaches you the arts of the CRAFT.

yeah i mean it's techno what else does he play besides minecraft

he will play bedwars w/ u, teaching you how to pvp

"bro you kinda suck tbh"

'stfu techno'

he will comment about how bad you are, but tries to help you get better anyways

and when you do a very poggers gamer move, he praises you

and when he praises you you're all :)))

after awhile, he gets tired from watching you play minecraft and suggest watching anime

fucking weeb

i mean

uh

other thing you guys do together in a sleepover is playing and commenting about pokemon

if you don't like pokemon get tf out of here /J

i was joking please don't leave i respect your tastes

✦ Jschlatt

ooooh boy

get ready for a session of wii training

that's all you guys will do

play wii sports and some other shit like wii music

he will laugh his ass of if you fall while playing wii fit

but he will eventually help you bc outside his funny and shouty persona, he's a really chill guy and a really nice person!

seriously like have you ever seen a theweeklyslap video?

well expect hearing amazing pep talks from him

bc this man is a legend and knows his way to words and is very good at comforting people :)

sometimes you'll rant to him about anything that's happening in your life, and he will listen to you and give you really helpful advice

and you appreciate him so much for that

✧─── ･ ｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

TYSM FOR READING GUYS, i appreciate it if you made it this far :)

i hope you guys really enjoyed these headcanons, it's my first time doing them and aa i'm a bit nervous about posting this but i'll be fine ig

also i'm sorry if there's a grammatical error, english is not my native language and i'm still learning it :) have a nice day/night, drink water and don't fuck up your sleeping schedule!!

[kass-storycorner]

Oh god, okay hear me out. I suffer from insomnia and I couldn’t get Childes letter out of my head (btw the English version is so much less “I am in love with you” than the German one. He literally says in the German version that he misses us and wants us to visit him, like straight up this is a love letter!! The English version is really toned down in comparison).

So. I know his birthday is over, at least where I’m from. But. I wrote this whole ass fan fic, that is way too long, because I was so inspired by that letter. I’m not really satisfied with the ending, I honestly wanted to add so much more fluff but… I also didn’t want to make this too long, I actually planned for it to be short??? help (also it’s 4am now noooo)

Happy birthday, Tartaglia

Genre: a little bit angsty, fluff, comfort

Rating: SFW, though mentions of kissing and sharing a bed

Content warnings: mention of a family death, Bennett’s bad luck lol but both are unrelated haha

Characters: Tartaglia x gn!reader, a guest appearance of Bennett, mention of Zhongli

Word count: 2,796 words (oooh f*ck haha)

-

You’ve been busy the whole day doing some commissions for the Adventures Guild and were now on your way to Mondstadt, when you heard a familiar voice call your name. “(Y/N)!”, Bennett called out to you and ran into your direction. A deep sigh left your throat, while you enjoyed Bennett’s company most of the time… you had to deal with a ton of your own bad luck today. Not one of the commissions today went the way they usually did, everything that could’ve gone wrong did go wrong. It was honestly just very frustrating, although you couldn’t be really sure if it was because of bad luck or because your mind was somewhere else most of the day. You shook your head, trying to get rid of the tiredness you already felt in your whole body and made your way towards Bennett. No matter what he needed help with you would be sure you could handle it. And in that moment, as the thought of how it wouldn’t be a big deal whatever Bennett had on his chest, you saw how the young adventure tripped over his own feet and fell face forwards into the dirt. ‘Ouch, that must’ve hurt’, you thought while running up to him. “Are you hurt? Here, let me help you up Bennett”, you asked while helping him get up from the ground. All you got as an answer from him was his usual laugh and smile. “Oh man, I really didn’t see that stone. Haha, thanks for the concern though!” You couldn’t help yourself and chuckled at the way he wiped off the dirt from his clothes. “So, what’s up? What do you want from me?.” “Yeah, right! I nearly forgot!”, he exclaimed and started fumbling in his bag. “Oh, got a present for me?”, you asked sheepishly. “Kinda, not really. Here!” Bennett held a letter in his hands, both bandaged again, and stretching it out to you. “A letter? For me?”, you took it in your hands. In a fine handwriting there was your name on it. It didn’t even took you a second for you to register who’s hand writing it was. What a surprise.

Before you could even start to ask Bennett how he got his hands on the letter he was already excitedly explaining it to you. “Today I had a commission on Dragonspine and to be honest, it didn’t really went that well until I ran into this one guy. I accidentally activated a few Ruin guards and well, even the most seasoned adventurer can’t fight more than one of these at a time and sadly the newest members of Benny’s adventure team had to go home again before we made it even to the mountain.”

The thought of Bennett nearly finding his end today on Dragonspine really… it really did not sit right with you. You made a mental note to ask him later who the new members were that ditched him. After you had your talk with them they wished they had stayed with Bennett on Dragonspine. “Well, in that moment when they approached me that one guy showed up and it only took him a few minutes to defeat them all. (Y/N) that was so cool! I tried to recruit him for my adventure team, but sadly he said he was already occupied with something else. Oh man, it would’ve been so cool to have him on my adventurer team, imagine with such an excellent fighter no one would be afraid of my bad luck to join my team.” While you enjoyed Bennett’s enthusiasm you had to interrupt him. “Wait, wait, Bennett. The person who gave you this letter is on Dragonspine?”

“Oh yeah! As I was saying I tried to recruit him for my team, but failed however we talked a bit and somehow he mentioned that he knew you! When I told him we were friends he asked me to give you this letter the next time I saw you.”

You felt how the excitement in you grew. He was on Dragonspine? He was so close to you again? Now you hardly could pay attention to what Bennett continued to say, all that was on your mind was the man, whom you saw the last time months ago in Liyue was so close again. “Bennett,” you interrupted him again. “Thank you so much for the letter, but I really need to get going. Thank you so much!”

And with that you changed your direction and made your way directly to Dragonspine. “Oh? Okay, bye (Y/N)!”, you heard Bennett call after you, but your mind was already occupied with opening that letter he gave you.

With shaking hands you read what stood on that thin paper in that neat and familiar handwriting:

“Hey, comrade! How have you been? You must have traveled far and wide since we last saw each other, right?

For me, I can only seek out some entertainment for myself. These past couple of days, I’ve used a work opportunity to explore Dragonspine and seek out some local specialties. I hope they will be of use to you.

The harsh cold of the snow-capped mountains is reminiscent to the scenery of my hometown…

Sigh, I’ve had many mundane days that makes me nostalgic of our time together. Whether it’s a fight or a challenge, I always feel that having you around is what makes life really interesting.

Haha, to be honest, I’ve been planning a special day to meet up with you, today could be that chance! If you have no special plans, how about you swing by my place?

I miss you, Tartaglia”

Quickly you put the letter in your bag with what accompanied it and now you were basically running towards Dragonspine. Right now you didn’t want to think about what kind of “work opportunity” there could be for the Harbringer on Dragonspine, all you could think about was seeing him again.

It has been months since you both parted ways in Liyue. You met him while being on a commission, funnily enough it was a bit similar how Bennett ran into him today. In one of Liyues ruins you looked for a book some historian in Liyue Harbour desperately tried to get their hands on. By the amount of Mora they were willing to pay it should’ve been obvious to you that it wasn’t a one-person mission… and still, you went alone into those ruins. You had no problem in destroying the first two ruin guards you ran into, but when three activated at the same time… If it weren’t for Tartaglia back then you would probably be dead. At first you were very thankful for his help, however when you found out he was also there for the book you needed your thankfulness quickly turned into anger. “Well, don’t you think I deserve a reward for helping you out, comrade?”, he teased you.

After that day you somehow always managed to run into him in Liyue Harbour or on your commissions. Back then you only knew him by his name used by the Fatui, Childe. Though it was well known in Liyue that he was one of the Harbringers, you somehow didn’t get that message after months of openly antagonising him. Only after Childe invited himself to your usual afternoon teas with your friend Zhongli you learned about his affiliations, but also more about him. If someone was hearing two people bickering, the people of Liyue knew it was you two. However none of it was malicious. Somehow it was the way you and Childe showed each other the appreciation you had for one another.

The first dislike you had for him grew quickly into a warm friendship. And that friendship grew in something more after awhile.

The first time you noticed a change in your feelings towards Childe was around the time of the Lantern rite festival. One night you were supposed to meet up with Zhongli - but Childe showed up in his instead. Apparently, so Childe, there was a lot to do at the Parlour because of a new promotion the director wanted to try and needed Zhonglis help with, so Zhongli asked Childe to accompany you to the Lantern rite.

Until this day you weren’t sure if this was just a set up by Zhongli, but even if it was, you wouldn’t hold it against him.

That night, when you and Childe walked around Liyue Harbour and watched the lanterns something fundamentally changed between the two of you. After that night you knew so much more about him and he about you. From that day on he wasn’t Childe anymore, he was Tartaglia. And both of you finally knew how the lips of the other felt on your own.

Now you were so close again to feel his warm arms around you, to listen to the sound of his heartbeat when you rested your head on his chest and to feel his lips on yours again. Oh how you missed him too.

Parting ways wasn’t easy. Both of you knew that it was best to not be so public with your relationship, for several reasons. On the one hand the Fatui weren’t what you would call popular - most people would use some stronger word to describe them. Being a Mondstadt citizen in Liyue openly dating a member of the Fatui, yeah no. On the other it was also not really well liked by the Tsaritsa for the members of the Fatui, no matter if you were just a low henchman or a Harbringer, to get involved in that way with outsides. With “not well liked” it was more implied that she forbade any romantic relationships outside and inside the Fatui ranks when they were on a mission. And Tartaglia was on a mission, a mission you knew nothing about, but to be honest? You preferred it that way. The longer you were able to ignore what it meant for him to be part of the Fatui, the better.

So because of all of this you both decided it would be best to keep the relationship in the shadows.

You both knew for sure was that you had to part ways one day, however none of you expected that you were the one going home before Tartaglia. There were a lot of nights of laying in bed with him, sharing stories from each of your homes. You told him about the Windblume Festival and Ludi Hapestrum, he told you about the festivals and traditions of Snezhnaya. When you shared stories of how your little siblings and you loved to collect as many dandelions as possible when you were children to pretend that it was snowing in the summer, he would counteract that story with the times he built entire fortresses with his siblings out of the snow in the winter. Only to then pull you closer and whisper in your ear that he’ll show you how to do that when you come with him back to Snezhnaya. You would always whisper back “okay, but first you’d need to glide with me off Startsnatch cliff”. The lovely nights you both spend together, telling each other of your homes and how much you want to show it to them were harshly interrupted by a letter you got from your family.

Life sometimes isn’t fair. It’s hard and it brutal and it’s short. So when you got the letter from your family informing you that the youngest member of the family had died, it broke you to pieces. They were only 14. That night Tartaglia held you in his arms, his hand on the back of your head, your head pressed into his chest and none of you could say a word. Only the sound of you crying piercing the quite room. Too heavy was the grief for anything to be said anyways.

The day immediately after you received that letter you and Tartaglia parted way, a quite and sad goodbye. None of you were actually sure when you would see each other again. With his hands against your tear stained face, the tears not only being shed out of grief but also out of the pain you had to leave your lover, he promised to write you as often as he could. You promised you would answer. And then you left, wishing he could come with you. Words you did not dare to speak, because you knew he couldn’t, no matter how much he wanted to.

Now you found yourself close to one of the Fatui camps on Dragonspine. It was quite irresponsible to just run up the mountain, without any proper preparation or knowledge where Tartaglias camp actually was. You sighed. The excitement of seeing him after such a long time, after just exchanging letters got the best of you. Frustrated with yourself you made your way towards the campsite, hoping that this time the Fatui henchmen wouldn’t immediately start attacking every stranger they see. However when you arrived at the camp site you saw that no one was there. Too exhausted from the commissions earlier in the day and running up the Dragonspine you let yourself fall down in front of the extinguished campfire. Slowly but surly the cold weather of the Dragonspine was catching up to you.

Going through your bag you were looking for the stones Tartaglia send with his letter, hoping to ignite a fire with them. But before you could find them you heart footsteps in the snow behind you.

You hadn’t even had the chance to turn around before you felt two arms looping around your body, immediately warming you up.

“Hey comrade, did you miss me?”

You felt his head on your shoulders and you couldn’t help but to lean your own against his. One of your hands made its way up to his face, touching his cheek. “Yes,” you whispered.

Turning your head you now looked into his deep blue eyes, they were filled with all the love he had for you. You wished he could look at you like this forever… that you could look at him forever.

Tartaglia leaned a bit forward, placing a soft kiss on your lips and you couldn’t help it but smile.

He slowly pulled away, entangling himself from the hug and holding his hand out to you. “Come, let’s go inside the tent. You must be freezing out here”.

Inside the tent Tartaglia threw one blanket on another blanket over another over you, while lecturing you on what appropriate clothing was for a weather like this. You really didn’t give it any second thought when you made your way to Dragonspine, still wearing the same clothes you would wear on a sunny day in Mondstadt. But you also couldn’t hide it how much you loved to just hear his voice, even when he was nagging you. “It’s fine really, now stop trying to bury me under all the blankets and warm me up yourself”, you took his hand and pulled him towards you onto the plank. “You know some people would find what you said very suggestiv”, he joked, joining you under the immense amount of blankets. “Mmmmh,” was the only thing you replied, completely enamoured with him having you by your side again. For a few minutes the both of you just laid there, close to each other and feeling each other’s heartbeat.

None of you could actually believe your luck to be in the arms of the other again. How much you had missed this. Missed him.

“Hey,” he spoke softly, making you look into his eyes again. “How you’ve been doing?”.

It was such a soft question and you knew what he meant. You wanted to tell him how exhausting everything has been since your arrival, how your family was breaking apart at all ends, what a shit show it all was. In your letters you only alluded to how bad it actually is. How it was all just made worse by him not being at your side. Though you knew you would have to tell him all of this sooner or later, right now you didn’t want to talk about it. Not in detail. Not when today was actually his special day. “It’s manageable, but better now that I’m here with you”, you replied to his question. “You?”

“Better, now that I have you here”, was his reply. You both smiled at each other, a warm and tender smile. Slowly you adjusted your position so that you now were laying on top of him, your chin on his chest. “Hey, there is something I forgot to tell you.”

“Oh, and what is it?”

“Happy Birthday, Tartaglia”, and with that you kissed him.

[bl00dgutsgl0ry]

You Shouldn’t Touch What’s Not Yours

Pairing - Diluc and Childe x Reader (separate of course).

Warnings - Violence, implied bullying/harassment/assault, very very mild gore.

Other Comments - I’ve wrote so much for Childe that I thought I should probably throw someone else into the mix, so why not put in my second favorite white boy Diluc hehe. (♡-_-♡) I can’t help but write angst for my babies but I promise I have some lighter fluffier stuff on the way  (￣ω￣;). I also tried to make these a little shorter since I was writing for two characters this time hehe.

~ Childe ~

      The day was set up to be so good. Childe had been quite busy with his usual Harbinger duties, but he had finally been able to score a couple days off and decided he wanted to plan out a romantic sequence of evenings. He had spent so much time and effort making everything perfect. Childe most definitely not frugal in any terms of the word, but he managed to surprise himself with how much Mora he had spent for just two days. Of course just the luck for him, a wrench had to be thrown into the mix.

      You had been having a tough couple of weeks trying to deal with a rather difficult man who had commissioned you from the Adventurers guild. After you had informed him that you were unable to complete his commission, he had decided to make your life a living hell; constantly throwing insults at you and almost getting physical with you on a couple of occasions.

      Now of course when you had received message from Childe that he was going to be “home” for a couple of days, you were absolutely floored. You missed him greatly and you were finally going to have someone to distract you from the awful harassment; but this also meant that you were going to have to figure out a way of hiding the obvious toll it took on you. 

      There were dark bags underneath your once gleeful eyes, from the loss of sleep due to worrying about this man and his whereabouts. There were also a couple of bruises left on your knees from stumbling when running away from your aggressor; though those could easily be written off as injuries from the Hilichurls or Treasure Hoarders.

      On the day of Childe’s arrival he had expected to be greeted with a beaming (y/n), and a great big hug, maybe even a passionate kiss. But what he was greeted with, was the shell of his significant other. Today was the worst possible day for him to see you, as you had just gotten out of a physical altercation with the usual suspect. There were clear tear stains, you had dirt and scrapes all over you, and he even dared to go as far as give you a bloody nose.

      You gave Childe a lifeless smile that couldn’t even reach your eyes, before heading straight into your apartment and closing the door; not waiting for Childe. Not only was he outraged and your actions and appearance, the way you were acting clearly alluded to this abuse lasting for a while. Why didn’t you say anything about it to him, send him a message? He could’ve sent over Fatui agents to take care of the cockroach. Of course his outrage was misplaced, is was not your fault; he knew this. He needed to get to the roots of this little weed.

      It took a little bit of digging, but once Childe found the source of your issues it was over. This man had never been more blind sighted with rage, than when he made eye contact with the piece of shit who dared to lay a hand on you or speak to you at all.

      Childe was very careful about only showing you the good side of him, at least for now as your relationship with him was still too new; so gods did it feel good to really beat the shit out of this guy. 

      “Hey you! Did you commission an adventurer by the name of (y/n) by any chance?” Childe new better than to suddenly go in swinging, by the slight off chance that this may have been the wrong man.

      “Huh? Oh yeah, or at least I tried. The useless little shit couldn’t get it done though, so I do not recommend them at all.” Ah yes, the flash of red in Childe’s vision confirmed it all. How dare they speak ill of you, and even worse touch something that belonged to him.

      “Bad news comrade, you should never touch something that isn’t yours.” There was an evil glint in Childe’s now dark eyes as he suddenly swung at the man. He didn’t really care if others say, he decided it was good to make an example out of this jerk.

      By the end of everything, Childe was spattered with blood, not to mention how awful his fists looked. Though that doesn’t even begin to cover what the other man looked like. To call him a bloody mess was an understatement, and the copper headed man wasn’t exactly sure if the man was even breathing anymore though of course he didn’t exactly care either. 

      With that, Childe cleaned himself up before heading back to your residence. He guessed he would just have to extend his stay with you for a few more days to make up for what this scum bag did. He would be damned if he left without seeing that playful glint return to your eyes.

~ Diluc ~

     Diluc was an incredibly busy man, so he never got to see you much except for the rare occasions that you would stop by the winery if you  were say in the area. So when he made the executive decision to leave work early and surprise you at home, he was more than a little shocked to see you getting yelled at by one of the Knights of Favonius.

       He knew you had always been a little more on the soft and sensitive side, which made him love you even more. You were the polar opposite to him in that regard, so a switch flipped in him when his eyes met your tearful ones.

      “Excuse me what happens to be the problem here?” Diluc’s strides were large and quick, trying to get between you and the dreadful knight as quickly as possible. It was clear that this Knight was not normally on patrol inside of Mondstadt, or on patrol anywhere for that matter as he seemed to be pretty new. Even if Diluc despised all of them, he knew almost every single one of them.

      “Well, this one right here clearly doesn’t understand the laws of gliding, as they clearly do not have a gliding license-”

      “I’ve been trying to tell you I have a license I must’ve just forgotten it! You can ask Amber she’s the one that did my test!” You were quick to explain yourself once again, accidentally cutting off the knight.

      “Don’t you dare interrupt me!” The knight reached around Diluc to push your shoulder, to which Diluc quickly shoved him back causing him to fall backwards.

      “Don’t fucking touch them. I’ll have you know, I know your Acting Grand Master quite well it would take no time at all to send her a letter of how poor you are at your job. You’re clearly new here, so i hope you enjoy getting your job stripped away as fast as you ‘earned’ it; if you could even say that.” The color completely drained from the knight’s face and they went to stand back up and quickly jogged away. With that Diluc quickly turned around to face you.

      “(Y/n) are you okay? Have you been hurt? I swear you should never trust any of the Knights they all-” Diluc was rambling, you’d never seen him this frantic before. It was almost kind of cute how he was almost as shaken up as you were as he looked you over for any injuries, even the smallest scrape.

      “Diluc, I am okay. Thank you for helping me.” On of Diluc’s gloved hands came up to cup your cheek as he brushed away the last few tears on your face with his thumb. Relief visibly flooded over him, before quickly going back to his usual stoic self. 

      “Well, I am glad I just happened to take the rest of the day off. This wasn’t exactly the way I was planning of surprising you with that but oh well.” A smile immediately lit up your face, causing Diluc’s to flush a light pink. 

      “Really?! That’s great I’m so excited! Wait... So are you really going to tell Acting Grand Master Jean about him?” Diluc let out a low chuckle.

      “I just might. I haven’t visited her office in quite some time either so I guess this does give me another excuse to take another day off from the tavern. And besides, a guy like him has no place in the Knights, he would’ve turned out to be a cocky power hungry fool. Now shall we get going?” 

[meow-sic]

hi elliot! can you do a drabble or hcs of how kuroo, the miya twins, oikawa, and bokuto would propose to their s/o? if that's a lot of characters, then pls just take your pick but pls include kuroo! thank u so much!! btw i really like your "they accidentally hurt you" post. it provides realism and a middle ground to the usual extremes we see in reader-insert content - idyllic/saccharine vs dark content (•ˇ‿ˇ•)

how they propose to you 𓍢 ᭡

includes : oikawa , kuroo , bokuto !

warnings : some misunderstandings in oikawa’s from a prank lolol , some cursing !

a/n : hi anon! ur my first anon message and you warmed my heart<333 also i lowk got inspiration from bokutos from a spanish music video i watched in spanish class today, sue me lololol

oikawa tooru

he’s just dumb

he thought it would be funny to try to prank you

dumbass

butttttt knowing his luck, it didn’t go as planned—

okay, well, it started off innocent— he planned to try to casually slide it in, maybe catch you off gaurd, then get down on his knee and ask you to marry him!

but, when you were on top of him tickling him, he wanted to get back at you.

and like tooru oikawa, he didn’t fully think it through.

“mei! stop!” he laughed, as a joke. it was supposed to be a joke.

you stopped your fingers that were wiggling by his sides. you slumped on his lap. “what?”

he peeked at you and smiled. “what do you mean what?”

“who’s mei?”

“i didn’t say mei,” he replied, your eyes watered and you got off of his lap. he sat up and stared at you. “y/n? are you okay?”

he got up but you already were in your room, slapping the door shut.

“stupid tooru! you made ‘em upset,” he scolded himself quietly.

when he walked up to your shared room, he heard the sniffles and sobs that came from the other side that broke his heart. he knocked on the door three times before entering.

“honey,” he walked over to you and hugged you. you sobbed into his chest.

“how long has it been going on tooru?” you asked through your sobs.

he pet your hair, “what do you mean baby?”

“don’t act dumb! it’s like—“ you paused. “it’s like you’re trying to ignore the fact you’ve been cheating!”

he thought you knew he was joking. “y/n—“

“if you’re not going to tell me then i’m leaving,” you turned around to start packing your bags.

his eyes widened in panic. “nonono! no, shit—“ he was embarrassed. “i didn’t mean it! it didn’t happen! mei isn’t real!”

you stopped packing, “what?”

“she—it was supposed to be a joke. a joke to make you stop tickling me. it’s dumb because i don’t think things through. but that’s why i need you— i need you to be there so you can stop me from doing the stupid shit that i do,” he looked at you to see if you were looking at him.

and you were, you looked pissed. he sighed and bent down on his knee, pulling out the ring he had gotten weeks ago.

“y/n, i know i’m dumb. but please, forgive me for this stupid prank, and please stay with me forever. don’t leave, please.”

“stand up.”

he did so, and he wasn’t sure what to expect, but a slap across the face wasn’t it.

“you’re a fucking idiot, tooru oikawa,” you laughed, kissing him. “but— i suppose that’s why i’m here. and i’m not leaving.”

he beamed at those words, he wasn’t sure if he smiled wider in his entire life. he kissed your cheek repeatedly, “i love you so much

kuroo tetsuro

PLEASE- he would set you upppppp

giving you hints, to where he is

but not random hints, it would be like a mini time line of your relationship

he would through a lil chemistry is there to mess with you

lovingly, though<3

you woke up alone in bed, a little confused since your boyfriend would always be there— to kiss you good morning.

you rolled over to grab your phone from its charger, looking at the text message from kuroo.

boyfrie tetsu<3

good morning baby<3 sorry i’m not there this morning, let’s play a little— hide and seek game, the prize is a big one!

the first hint: we didn’t quite meet there, but it was where i became your “boyfriend” for the first time

good luck baby!<3

you were confused by his text, and honestly, you almost wanted to ignore it. it’s too damn early for this.

but, you can’t. you knew he was going to be waiting for you, and you can’t leave him all alone.

your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you groaned and started your day. you still got dressed none the less, and went to a café you always go to.

as the barista handed you your drink, you saw a note on it.

dear y/n,

you’re probably here for your morning coffee, but, none the less, this is where we first started to ‘date’! that one guy who wouldn’t stop hitting on you, and your prince charming (aka me aka the most handsome man ever) came to your rescue;)

where we promised each other is your new hint, good luck!<3

you knew where it was once you read the bolder letters. you thanked, and tipped the barista. you were more than happy to remember the memory.

“tetsu, it’s so late out, what if we get kidnapped!” you ranted your anxieties to him.

“kidnapped? you think anyone would dare to fight your prince charming?” he kissed your head as you two walked. “we’re almost there.”

he led you to the bridge that curved over the water like a C shape. you both leaned forward on the cement railing and looked at the moon.

“i’m so in love with you, y/n.” he admitted out of the blue, you looked at him.

“i’m in love with you too, tetsu.” you leaned your head on him, he wrapped an arm around you.

“i know we’re only in highschool. but i promise, i’ll marry you.”

“i’ll be waiting for that day, tetsu. even if it’s till we’re sixty, or if we’re only in our young twenties and being stupid. i’ll be waiting for you.”

you both melted at each other’s words, you shared a passionate kiss.

you ran up to where the bridge was. your pace slowed as your boyfriend came into view. he was holding flowers, and a lock.

you panted, “i hate running tetsu.” you breathed out, he laughed at you. “i know, sorry.”

you stood straight, looking at what he was wearing. it looked fancier than usual. “what’s the lock for?” you asked.

he looked at it and smiled, “i remember, it was our second year of college. you were so mad that they changed the bridge. that they changed the fencing, and couples started to put locks on it.”

“..and?”

“and i was thinking we could do one too?” he questioned. you smiled and grabbed the lock. you bent down and locked it, he wrote both of your initials on it.

you stood up, but your boyfriend stayed on his knee.

“tetsu what are you doing?”

he pulled a little box from his back pocket, a few pedestrians stopped and watched what was happening.

“when we were sixteen, we made a stupid promise to each other at midnight on this bridge. and i promised i would marry you. y/n, i told you ten years ago, when we were sixteen, that i love you.” he paused for a second to look up at your face, which was in shock. “and i still do, so please, keep the promise and marry me.”

“oh my god, oh my god! yes yes!” you got on your knees with him. he laughed at you for getting on your knees with him instead of waiting for him to stand up.

you tackled him in a hug while other people clapped for you two.

bokuto kotarou

tbh this stressed him out

he wasn’t sure when, how, or what to say

you two had talked about marriage and how you two would gladly marry each other

but he wasn’t sure when!!!

he kept the ring on him at all times just incase:)

you and bokuto were just returning from a walk. the snow was heavier than expected by you two, so when you got home to a pile of snow, you were thrilled.

“kou let’s make a snowman! like we did with your old team, c’mon!” you dragged him by the hand to your front yard.

you and bokuto were always childlike in your relationship, you two getting excited at the tiniest things that makes you two act like children. so when you saw the snow, you felt more than joy.

you began by making a small snowball in your hand, and rolling it as you walked around your yard, to form a big snowball for the base. by the time you were done with the biggest snowball, bokuto was done with the medium sized one.

“okay, if we pick it up at the same time, it shouldn’t break,” you lifed the medium sized snowball with him. you set it on top of the biggest one.

“hey hey hey! y/n! let me make the tinniest one while you get the scarf, carrot, and eyes and smile,” he suggested. you nodded and kissed his cold cheek before heading inside to quickly grab the items.

you grabbed a pink scarf, a white hat that kou got you one year, and a carrot and some coal for the eyes and smile.

when you headed outside, you saw the snowman was all made. your insides felt bubbly as your childlike happiness was showing.

you ran out to him. “i got everything kou!”

“okay! you decorate, and don’t turn around until i say so. i have a surprise for you,” he replied. you were confused at what the surprise could be, but you agreed none the less.

you put the carrot in the middle of the snowman’s face. you then placed the eyes, and tried your best to make the smile symmetrical.

you wrapped the scarf around it’s neck, and put the hat on top. “okay kou, i’m done! can i turn around?”

there was a short pause, “okay now you can.”

you turned around to him on his knee, holding out a ring. your mouth dropped open to see writing in the snow.

will you marry me? ♥︎

“yes! yes yes!” you basically screamed, tackling him and kissing him repeatedly.

“the ring! wheres the ring?” he questioned. you both started to dig it up in the snow, laughing at how stupid you two were.

you found it, and slid it on your finger. “i cant wait to marry you, baby.” your hands slid up and down his chest before you kissed him.

[realcube]

how haikyuu!! characters confess to you on valentine’s day💘

characters: kyōtani, tsukishima, sugawara & akaashi 

tw// none 

kentarō kyōtani

♡ writes you letter and puts you it in your locker 🥺

♡ but you catch him in the act FDGHJGFD

♡ he memorised that you usually arrive at school at around half passed eight so he made it a point to get to school extra early so nobody would see him

♡ but little did he know, you had the exact same plan in mind 🤦‍♂️

♡ so when you walked into school and noticed kyōtani aggressively pounding on your locked bc his chucky letter wouldn’t fit through the slot, you both froze in your tracks

♡ he realised how shady it looked that he was trying to get into your locker — plus, he was aware that he already had the appearance and the reputation of a delinquent, so he immediately thought that you would assume he was trying to rob your locker

♡ but in reality, not even for a second did you think that he was trying to steal anything

♡ but either way, mans took off 🏃‍♂️

♡ cut to you chasing him through the hallways, yelling for him to come back so you could confess to him

♡ but he thought you were chasing him bc you were angry 

♡ eventually he reached a dead-end so he had no choice but to face your wrath

♡ so imagine his surprise when - instead of screaming at him - you handed him a box of chocolates in a heart-shaped box, with a little sticky note on top with ‘be my valentine?’ written on it

♡ he was speechless so he just kinda looked up and stared at you with a blank expression

♡ ‘i know it’s cheesy but it was the best i could come up with.’ you stuttered, desperately trying to break the awkward silence kyōtani had left you in

♡ he was finally able to process what you had just given him and subtly shoved his love letter into his pocket now that you had confessed to him, ‘uh, thanks, i guess.’ 

♡ your lips instinctively fell into a frown, assuming that was a ‘no’. but to hide your disappointment, you forced a smile back on before turning your heels and hastily rushing away - planning to go cry in the bathroom now ✌ ‘okay, erm, bye, kyōtnani!’

♡ kyōtani’s eyes widened at how shaky your voice was all of a sudden and why you seemed to desperate to get away from him. had he said something to upset you?

♡ ‘uh, bye. meet me by the gates after school today.’

♡ you paused in your tracks, almost tripping over by doing so, ‘why?’ you choked, peering over you shoulder to look at him with hopeful, wide-eyes which caught him off-guard

♡ like jesus christ you looked cute-

♡ he felt his cheeks heat up at the sight so he quickly turned his head to the side and barked, ‘don’t be an idiot! obviously i’m gonna take you to the shop and buy you some chocolates - it’s only fair.’

♡ ‘like..a date?!’ you squealed, twirling around and clasping your hands together in delight 

♡ ‘no.’

♡‘oh-’

♡ ‘i’ll take you on a date in the park afterwards.’  

♡ you bounced excitedly, unable to resist the urge to throw yourself into his arms and hold him in a tight embrace, ‘i can’t wait!’ 

♡ kyōtani let out a light sigh of relief as he felt your chest press tightly against his own, ‘yeah, same’

♡ although he didn’t sound too enthusiastic, he showed that he was looking forward to the date by skipping practise so you didn’t have to wait for him :))

kei tsukishima 

♡ he does not ask you to be his valentine’s at the start of the day

♡ he just waits - not so patiently - for you to ask him 

♡ but you didn’t >:(

♡ he was livid

♡ oh and during lunch you got him so hopeful bc you were like ‘oh, tsukki! i almost forgot. i’ve got something for you!’

♡ and he was like 90% sure it was a box of chocolates to accompany your confession but it was hIS FKN CHARGER THAT HE ACCIDENTALLY LEFT AT YOUR HOUSE A FEW DAYS AGO AAAAAA

♡ grrr so since the whole day passed and you didn’t confess to him, he figured that he had to do everything himself 🙄

♡ last period, he texted you, asking for you to meet him at his house after your club

♡ (he wanted to confess in a location where there was no one around to make fun of him if he got rejected and if he was accepted, then he could take you on a date to the café near his house) 

♡ so begrudgingly, you did - but after your club 

♡ and you were under the impression that he went to volleyball club that day so he wouldn’t have to wait by his house for too long but rather, he skipped that day so he could first pop to the shops to buy a bouquet 

♡ when you arrived at his house, you were greeted by him holding at bouquet of flowers and forcefully shaking them, indicating that he wanted you to take them

♡ ‘what are these for, tsukki?’ you hummed, grasping the stems of the flowers and slowly pulling them towards you, taking a long whiff of their sweet scent

♡ tsukishima looked away shyly, unable to make eye-contact with you without blushing. damn, this was harder than he thought. 

♡ ‘for valentine’s day, duh.’ 

♡ you smirked, hugging the bouquet to your chest as you gazed up at him longingly, ‘so are you asking me to be your valentine or are these sympathy flowers?’ 

♡ tsukishima rolled his eyes, ‘asking you to be my valentine. but you’re so oblivious, i’m starting to regret it now.’

♡ that was a lie

♡ tsukishima mentally scolded himself; he was literally trying to get you to go out with him? why was he insulting you?

♡ ‘well, i’d love to be your valentine, kei.’ you cooed, your arms full with the flowers so instead of hugging him, you pressed your face in his chest and steadily, his large hand found it‘s way to your back, rubbing up and down your spine

♡ although on the outside he acted all nonchalant about it, on the inside he was setting off fireworks and celebrating 

♡ there was a long while of silence between the two of you, until he broke it by inquiring, ‘wanna go get something to eat?’ 

♡ ‘yessss!’

kōshi sugawara

♡ probably planned for weeks beforehand

♡ makin sure he was extra fanon suga around you 

♡ so when valentine’s day rolls around, he gives you a box of homemade cookies with barely any explanation 

♡ then you noticed a lil’ sticky note on it, telling you to meet him at his house at 7PM 

♡ you acted accordingly and once you arrived at his house, you were greeted by more homemade cookies and sugawara in a tuxedo 

♡ ofc he led you to his back garden, gesturing for you to take a seat at the table he had set out under his small gazebo 

♡ the table was all set for a hot date; which you could tell by the pale tablecloth, expensive-looking ivory plates, sparkling clean cutlery and the cherry on top was the candle he had lit which sat in the middle of the table 

♡ then he came out with cloche, rushing up to you before lifting the lid - and once the clouds of steam subsided, you realised it was your favourite food- 

♡ ‘you’re so extra, kōshi.’ you whined, hiding your blushing face with your hands 

♡ he chuckled at your flustered reaction, taking a seat on the chair across from you only to lean across the table slightly to get a better view of you, ‘i just wanted this to be perfect for you, (y/n).’ he shrugged, not sure whether to take your statement as a compliment or insult

♡ ‘it is. thank you!’ you finally removed your hands from your face for him to see your grateful expression

♡ UHGFFKUJ HIS HEART 🥺

♡ anyway, he probably makes a big deal out of feeding you the first few bites of your food bc he thought it’d be romantic but he accidently dropped some on your school bottoms smh 

♡ also, at some point in the night, he makes sure to do that thing where he leans across the table and eyes your lips while wiping some food off the corner of them 

♡ oh and knuckle kisses 🥰

♡ he genuinely didn’t want the night to end so his heart sunk when he had to escort you back to your house

♡ but at least he got to hold your hand :))

♡ you were both staring up at the gorgeous night sky that was decorated by stars in comfortable silence, until sugawara realised something, ‘oh, i didn’t even ask you to be my valentine- my bad!’

♡ before you could coo an ‘it’s okay’, suga had already skipped in front of you and fell to one knee, taking you hand in his own and bringing it to his lips

♡ ‘kōshi’ you squealed, trying to cover your face with your spare hand - your heart skipped a beat at how similar sugawara’s actions were to a proposal 

♡ suga thought you were so cute when you were shy aaaa (❤´艸｀❤)

♡ ‘(y/n), will you do me the honour of being my valentine?’

♡ ‘you’re such a prince!’ you gasped upon making a connection between sugawara’s signature beam and that of a charming prince from movies

♡ suga faltered at how off-topic your comment was, ‘thank you- but is that a no?’

♡ your eyes widened, rapidly shaking your head and dropping to your knees to place a lil’ peck on his forehead, ‘nonono! it’s a yes!’

♡ suga couldn’t help but snort at your adorable actions, mimicking them and pecking the tip of your nose

keiji akaashi 

♡ definitely a secret admirer thing leading up to valentine’s day

♡ he’s been leaving notes in your locker for months tho

♡ he just loved seeing the wide grin spread across your face while you read the letter he wrote  

♡ then he realised that valentine’s day was approaching so that gave him an excuse to confess 

♡ one day he somehow mustered up the courage to write ‘meet me by the forest at 5′ on it and as soon as he slipped it into your locker, he was panicking

♡ like he was so anxious; the biggest fear on his mind being that, what if you didn’t like him?

♡ he was even considering not showing up bc he was too nervous

♡ but the last thing he wanted to do was ghost you and potentially hurt your feelings so he turned up 

♡ when you saw him, he was acting so odd - hardly even acknowledging your presence -  that you weren’t sure if he was the one writing the letters or if it’s just a coincidence 

♡ ‘hi..’ he finally murmured, gently tapping your shoulder to grab your attention

♡ you smiled, clutching the letter to your chest as you twitched with excitement, ‘hi! are you, erm..the person who’s been writing these letters?’

♡ akaashi nodded, keeping his gaze glued to the ground while awkwardly fidgeting with his fingers

♡ ‘oh- well, they’re so beautiful! you have such a way with words and you make my day ten times brighter. thank you so much, akaashi.’

♡ he perked up upon hearing you say his name, he didn’t think you knew it-

♡ i mean, yeah, you were in the same biology and maths class but in the past, you’ve never even spared him a glance

♡ ‘it’s no problem. and seeing you smile makes my day brighter so..’ akaashi instantly cringed at how stalkerish and pathetic that must’ve sounded 

♡ so needless to say, he was pleasantly surprised when you simply giggled in response, ‘you’re sweet- anyway, i was wondering you’d like to come with me to get tea or someth--’

♡‘sure.’ he was sold at ‘tea’. 

@the-astrumnauta @scftfairyking​ 

[llendrinall]

Hello. I hope you're having a wonderful day/night.

So I'm both a fan of HP and Marvel and I had the thought.

What if Percy left the wizarding world after Fred's death and somehow became friends with Tony (honestly one of my favourites characters) and stuck with him throughout the years and actually told him about magic (its an ongoing argument. "It's magic Tony." "No, Perce its not. Its just science I cant explain yet.") So after the snap Percy comes to Tony and tells him about his crazy idea to go back in time and stop the Purple testicle from killing half of everything. And Tony agrees. But instead of going back to 2010 (To prepare for the invasion) they both get sent to 1990 and proceed to try and fix everything terrible that happened from there. (You can make them fall in love if you want. Ik in my head they do but in the end im giving you artistic freedom for whatever you decide to add to this)

One day im actually planning on writing something like this but for now id love to read how you'd build this up.

Ha, I love that you end up saying that one day you will write it yourself, Marvel-anon, because that’s the answer. You have the story thought out and want it to go down a certain path whereas I… Well, I wrote my first HP fic out of spite to 80% of the fandom saying they wished they could go to Hogwarts. I tend to look at things askew so I’m not the best person to ask when you have something specific in mind.

Also, Tony Stark is a complex character suffering from very poor and inconsistent writing. RDJ’s performance is his only redeeming quality, because RDJ gives humanity to a self-absorbed jerk. My reading of Tony is probably quite different. I deeply dislike the genius millionaire. That character is a Venom villain and nothing else. Whereas the cursed genius with a cursed legacy who is only now learning to let go of his family’s baggage… yes, I can like that person.

Tony doesn’t care about magic. He might have cared for about a minute until Percy explained everything about the schools, the wands, the ministries and the international statute of secrecy. All that just goes to prove that magic is boring. That’s not magic. That’s people with powers, like the kids at Xavier’s school. Magic, actual magic as Tony understand it, is accidentally cursing yourself because you have very low self-esteem. Magic is arranging your tools a certain way so the Philips-head screwdriver isn’t offended and keeps dropping screws and sending them to dark dusty corners. Magic is performing a complicated ritual of offerings when writing code, like the techs at Stark enterprises do. What Percy does is just another kind of superpower.

Percy agrees.

What Tony really wants to know is where does Dr. Strange stand in all this. Why is he allowed to cavort around Brooklyn doing shiny spells while dear Percy is not?

The answer, of course, is racism. Each country is responsible for enforcing the statue of secrecy according to their own legislation. MACUSA forbade wand magic and all sorts of Native American magic and called it a day, completely forgetting that there are more countries and more magic practices. The idea that someone could skip proper western school as a child and then go to a foreign school as an adult didn’t even cross their minds. But that’s what happened. Dr. Strange isn’t even the first student to skip Ivermony. He got a letter of acceptance but the name didn’t ring any bells, the school didn’t seem to have a lacrosse program and he had already been accepted in a proper school with a legacy so his parents dismissed the offer. Dr. Strange is a wizard like any other, only he doesn’t use a wand.

Tony is assuaged. He even likes Strange better now that he knows that, in a way, he is annoying the government.

Then the snap happens and almost everyone is gone, including Strange.

Percy has the time travel idea. But the problem with changing the past is that you either become redundant, because you fix whatever motivated you to go back so you don’t go back so nothing is changed… or you succeed but create a parallel universe or two. Percy knows it. Tony knows it. They both refuse to see reason because both of them have to live with the weight of a guilty conscience.

Steve talks to them, to no avail. Bruce Banner talks to them and makes a lot of sense but it’s easy to ignore Bruce. Hermione talks to them. Scott talks to them and actually makes things worse. Pepper is the only one to make a dent. She and Tony’s one friend from summer school, Bruce (not to be confused with Bruce Banner).

Summer Camp Bruce is a kid who befriended Tony when they were both tiny geniuses from rich families in a summer camp for gifted (and not so gifted but definitely showing talent, ok maybe they were completely useless but they were rich) children from rich (to insulting rich, to I know my kid is an imbecile but let’s pretend he is not because I have lots of money) families. Summer Camp Bruce was dusted in the snap. That’s the most aggravating part, that he still foresaw Tony doing something stupid and left a series of “in the event of my death” notes to be sent periodically to Tony telling him to reconsider. As if Summer Camp Bruce had never made stupid decisions. At least Tony wasn’t missing for five years, presumed dead*.

Tony and Percy go to the past and they manage to learn by themselves that what happened, happened, and they have to live with who they are and what they did. It sucks. There should be a way to stop the abuse on Harry. There should be a way to stop Tom Riddle from growing into a murderous nihilist. There should be a way to stop Tony from using his talent to develop weapons.

But there isn’t. Not in this universe.

What they can do is grab the stones, bring them to the present, unsnap the snap and, since they have unlimited power, bring some extra people too, like Fred and a very confused Oh Yinsen and that kid with the silver head, Wandas’ brother. They can’t erase the past but they can make a better future.

Then Tony proceeds to keel over and die from the gauntlet.

Percy roars. He feels like he may throw up his own heart. He feels his blood is turning to stone. The earth shakes, his vision blurs and he only starts to breath when Tony jerks and opens his eyes, and that? That is the actual magic Tony was talking about. Pulling someone from the hands of death by sheer force of will and madness (and possibly love). Your hair turning white after you perform the miracle, except for one strand that keeps the red. Actual wizards looking shock and aghast. That is magic and Tony is going to study very closely for the rest of his life.

*If we are doing a crossover we may as well cross everything and bring Bruce Wayne to the mix.

[falsegoodnight]

this is part two of my december fic rec! this list encompasses the fics i’ve read from the 18th to the 28th!! it’s also my birthday today which makes it even more special! i can think of no better way to spend today than spreading positivity! :)

you can find part one of this month here

✰ there’s happiness because of you by @hadestyles | NR | 1k - (so soft, tender, and beautiful!! rori’s writing amazes me always! and this was written for my birthday because they’re an angel <3)

Thursday mornings have always been their favourite.

✰ and it gets colder and colder by @hadestyles | E | 2K - (another rori fic!! once again, beautiful prose! made me feel emotional!)

Harry wants to take care of Louis. Things take a turn.

✰ make my wish come true by @soldouthaz | M | 3k - (drabble from this series) (so cute, lovely, soft, amazing!!! made my heart so happy! this is also dedicated to me which :’) sarah angel chant)

The taste of Christmas cookies fresh out of the oven and peppermint hot chocolate is still heavy on his tongue. Harry’s sweater provides some warmth and it still smells of him from before he left for his internship two weeks ago, but it’s nowhere near the feeling of his arms wrapped around him. Louis shivers despite the blankets.

✰ spirit meets the bones by @hadestyles​ | E | 3k - (i had to edit to add this because rori wrote another beautiful little fic for me :’) beautiful prose, beautiful emotions, so so so beautiful, gosh. pure poetry!)

The action shouldn’t fill his eyes with tears but it does. These small gestures mean the world to him. A steady reminder that Harry does notice all the tiny, seemingly insignificant details that make Louis him.

✰ 29 Blows by @quelquesetoiles | E | 4k - (super hot but also so cute!! love the concept of the birthday tradition in this one!!!)

For over a decade now, Harry has had his little tradition. It wouldn't be a Louis Tomlinson birthday without his best friend finding new, ingenious ways to make his life more difficult.

It's cute, it's funny, it's theirs, until Harry takes it a step too far on Louis' 29th birthday.

✰ calm me down (before i sleep) by @erodiansunflower | E | 7k - (a pwp and super hot, but also super cute??)

Prompt 24: Harry is a sex shop owner that has a crush on Louis, the shy customer who flirts with him while buying cute buttplugs, lace panties, and collars. One day, Louis asked Harry to help him put on a corset (they end up fucking in the dressing room). Things escalate quickly from there, so they start seeing each other seriously while trying other sex stuff.

✰ You’re Never Alone With a Moon This Bright by @helloamhere | T | 8k - (part one of this series) (WOW this was incredible and i am ENTRANCED! this author is an all-time favorite and idk why it took me so long to get to this series but i’m here now!! and loving it!!)

Louis was a monster. But sometimes, even monsters get a Christmas.

✰ Be a Good Girl For Me by @sincetheywere16and18 | E | 9k - (really hot and cute!!!)

Based on this prompt: “AU where Harry is Louis’ older brother’s best friend. He catches Louis dancing around his room in panties and blackmails him, saying that louis has to do anything he says or else he’ll tell Louis’ family that he wears girly underwear. Secretly soft for him, Harry gives him easy tasks and uses the whole thing to spend more time with Louis. Eventually, the orders begin to escalate and Harry teases Lou about his secret, making Louis shy and embarrassed. Louis loves the attention though, and forms a crush on his brother’s best friend. Lots of feminization, secret relationship, and enemies to lovers. Thank you!”

✰ it’s hard to fight naked by @loustarlight | E | 11k - (LOVED this so much!!! a big fan of enemies/flatmates to lovers especially when there’s a walk-in involved!!)

Louis leaves dirty socks on the couch, Zayn does assignments while he's high, and Harry is hopelessly crushing on his roommate.

✰ Sweet Scary Creatures by @specklelouis | M | 13k - (jurassic park au!! so cute and fun!!! loved louis’ character growth in this in particular!)

They stare into each other's eyes for a while until Louis remembers this is too intimate and looks at Harry’s hands on his thigh. It spans a big portion of his thigh and Louis has always been insecure about how thick he is, so he loves that Harry has huge, dustbin hands that hold him and makes him feel smaller, safer.

✰ hereafter (ad infinitum) by @larryent | M | 13k - (this was absolutely beautiful!! the writing was incredible, the contrast between the old timeline and new one impeccable, and the letters!!! love them!! and vampire harry is always a win!)

"A legacy is every life you’ve touched. And you’ve touched mine twice."

On the coast of San Francisco in 2024 is when Harry falls in love all over again.

✰ Believe Me When I Say You Have It All by @helloamhere | T | 20k - (part two of this series) (loved this even more than it’s predecessor. not to be dramatic, but i’d die for the louis and harry in this series. this whole world has my heart)

Harry had never faced anything in this forest that had actually succeeded in scaring him. Louis was no exception.

✰ Yours to Lose by @loulicate-recs | M | 26k - (so cute and soft and sweet!!! louis and harry were both angels and IAN <3 little cutie!!! so proud of you hanis!)

Louis always gets distracted with his mummy duty and he eventually catches Harry's attention.

✰ But It’s Useless by @thinlinez | E | 26k - (this put such a big smile on my face!! so cute and lovely!! louis was a relatable and adorable menace and harry was a smitten idiot but they both got there in the end!!)

Omega Louis would never guess that he would be trying to hack into Alpha Harry's Wifi. That is until everything changes when he tries to get to know his enemy.

✰ Stuck On You by Writewhatiwant | E | 34k - (so so sweet! loved the aspect of stickers in this fic and how louis found joy in them!! really loved how both louis and harry (especially harry) grew throughout this story and how they found peace at the end!)

Louis’ life revolves around his stickers. Harry’s life revolves around his job. The universe has decided their worlds should revolve around each other.

✰ smoke between your teeth by @soldouthaz | E | 37k - (i think everyone knows how much i adore sarah and her fics but this one just might be a new favorite! loved all the psych stuff, the pining, the rom-com worthy confession <3 brilliant!)

Louis tries to stop his addiction to cigarettes and discovers he's been addicted to Harry for much, much longer.

✰ Your Life Worth Walking on a Bright Morning by @helloamhere | T | 38k - (part three of this series) (it just keeps getting better and better <3 so comforting and consistent and beautiful!)

For all its complexity, Louis sometimes reminded himself, life could always be simplified into a series of forks in the road. Even overwhelmingly big things were survivable when you broke them down to their choice. One path or the other, left or right.

✰ On The Edge by @zanniscaramouche | E | 47k - (so crazy good!! zanni is always amazing me!! loved the ice skating, the hockey, the misunderstandings, the multi-faced and beautiful characters and relationships - all so perfect!)

Figure skating is as vital to Louis’ identity as his DNA, so when his skates go missing right before the last Olympics of his career there may be a meltdown only vanilla bath salts can fix. Well, that and the stupidly charming hockey player he met on the plane.

Harry’s too old to be the wonder kid and too young to be taken seriously in the NHL. As an alternate thrown in at the last second, he fights to prove himself on the national team at the largest sporting event known to man. Or he will, once he gets off this flight and can focus on something other than the fussy figure skater and his stunningly blue eyes.

A baggage mix-up skews both of their perfectly laid plans for gold, forcing the two to work together as the clock clicks towards the minute they’re expected to shine on centre ice.

✰ made for lovin’ you by @cuddlerlouis | E | 53k - (loved this so much!! touch depri/accidental bonds are my favorite and this was no exception!!! the characterizations, the tension, the misunderstandings, the tenderness, the fluff!!! so good!)

A quick, horny decision ruins Louis’ summer plans, but may also lead to unexpected discoveries. Featuring the road trip of dreams, misunderstandings, and a bit of fate.

✰ social cues by @outropeace | E | 56k - (so fucking good!! the slow burn in this was impeccable!!! pair it with friends with benefits, mutual pining, angst, misunderstandings... amazing <3)

To Harry, Louis was becoming as tangible and essential as music in his life. He still was a mystery but at the same time, he was one of the most real things Harry had. He just hoped he could live up to the image Louis probably had in his mind of him.

He could play the part, after all, what was published of him wasn’t as detached from reality. He didn’t think of himself as a rockstar cliche, although he couldn't deny he did sleep around, partied a lot, and did some drugs. But then again, wasn’t that what the majority of his friends back in his hometown were doing at college?

Harry wanted to impress Louis, he didn’t want to disappoint or leave his expectations unfulfilled, so he’d give him the full rockstar experience.

It was a very simple plan, what could possibly go wrong?

✰ dripping like spider milk by @raspberryoatss | E | 64k - (pip amazing me with her talent? a common occurrence. this was so wonderfully written and so well done!! loved the characterizations, the dynamic, the angst, the miscommunication, the pining, the HUMOR!!! it was all so amazing!!)

When he sees the alpha, his brown hair curling around the top of his neck and his broad back that’s filled out over the past couple of years, Louis freezes for a moment. The alpha turns around, Louis’ surprised expression mirrored on his own for a fraction of a second before he schools it into a big, yet shy grin and a wave of his huge hand. With his nostrils flared, Louis knows that he can smell him, too.

They never hired alphas, except for—

“Harry.”

✰ a taste of freedom and sweetened passion by @tomlinvelvetfics | M | 74k - (okay technically haven’t finished reading this one yet but i want to get this up early and i already know this is amazing because it’s LATE and she’s incredible!!! and, i mean, anne of green gables?? abo?? best birthday gift ever!! will be spending the day reading this in bliss <3)

“Are you mad?” he explodes, throwing his hands up, groaning. “I was so, so close to reaching my goal, and your stupid, stalking ass had to creep up on me, hm?”

Harry is trying to keep his laughter in, walking closer to him, eyes soft. He doesn’t like the way those eyes make him feel, an odd, dangerous mix of nervous and flustered, so he bends down to pick up the books, raising an eyebrow when Harry growls in protest.

“I wanted to pick them up for you,” the alpha pouts, and Louis glares at him, getting into position and lowering the pile of yellowed pages over the top of his head.

“I’m a functional human being, thank you very much,” he grits out as he begins to walk and mentally count the amount of steps he takes. One, two, three, for heaven’s sake Harry fuck off!, four, five. He doesn’t let himself be distracted as the alpha walks along with him despite the slow pace, green eyes focused on him in a way that would, in any other cases, compelled him to throw a book in the alpha’s face.

He doesn’t know why he doesn’t do it and certainly doesn’t want to think about the reason, whatever it might be.

If you read any of these lovely fics, remember to leave kudos and comment to show your appreciation!

*if i made any errors, please let me know :)

enjoy!

[fragileizywriting]

okay. hi. good morning! here's the plan for us. stick with me.

i've got a lot of stuff to post starting january, like [redacted], and a birthday gift fic that i've been writing behind the scenes, and i'm also going back to school, so this is going to be fun. this is going to be very fun. my weeks are going to be filled, so, in order to relieve some of the load i'm going to use january/february to let me rewrite DL.

do not worry!

i will not be deleting the original! and i will not be rewriting the fic in the original fic! i will be posting an entirely new fic, and i will link it in the original's summary/description/at the end of the fic.

i'm not completely sold on the idea just yet, but i might also be taking the original DL out of the series list. i'm not sure. i feel bad taking it out, but also, it might be annoying to first-time readers to accidentally read the same fic (with lots of changes) back to back. let me know if you have a solution, because i'd love to keep them in the same series. should i put it in the front, as #1? or should i put it in the back? i'm unclear :(

here's a preview of what the rewrite will have changed (non-exhausting list):

* better chapter distribution! i'll be using the actual chapter count (meaning, how i wrote it in my document), instead of lumping three chapters in at a time. the real chapter count for DL is 16. i think it's only the last chapter that has a stupid weird imbalance of words? maybe? i'll fix that too.

* luka will have his proper age mentioned (no more saying he's 3,000 years older than adrien)! luka will mention his bad back (caused by his aching wings!) his wings will be mentioned!

* adrien will bring up how he is suspicious of luka's bad back! adrien will bring up part of the over-arcing plot via a letter he got from back home but decided to trash (that's why he's late and why he's in a grumpy mood!) "you're here late. what happened?" "got a letter from my dad." "ah. what did gabriel want?" "i hate how you call him gabriel. i'm not defending him, i'm just genuinely curious, what's your beef with him?" "he's always hated me first." "we're going to talk about it." "maybe. one day." "no, we're definitely going to talk about it. i'm getting impatient, you know." "yeah, don't worry. i've lost my own patience about a couple hundred thousand years ago, too."

* chloe, the random human, will change species!

* marinette will be more bold with her affection towards adrien, including be much more physical-- the "bet"/contract will change, too!

* alya will know about The Secret that marinette is hiding!

* nino will actually make an appearance in this fic instead of being a referenced character!! he's too much of an angel for me to just leave out ;_;

* marinette and nathaniel will have a genuine conversation! adrien will hate him anyway! nathaniel will mention that he's been looking for her since she left, and mention the confusion because lila said "you've apologized, you can go home now!" to which marinette goes "what do you mean i apologized? what the hell did i apologize for?" nathaniel will also bring up genuine, valid points about how "making her wait until adrien can tell her the truth" isn't what love is! marinette will actually mention and do something about the synthetics that nathaniel is taking, and bring that plot back to DL like i'd wanted to but forgot about!

* marinette and adrien will also have a genuine conversation! adrien will apologize for making her wait so long while she continued to waste away, all because he couldn't get his act together! "is this why you were leaving for rome?" "it's also why i couldn't tell you, because you'd make a decision based on a time-crunch, not because you wanted to."

* nathaniel will actually be able to say goodbye to her when she asks adrien and luka to come over, instead of just kinda disappearing like in the original!

* more (so much more!) and better (so much better!) smut! including marinette pulling the side of luka's shirt to see his tattoo in the car (like i had wanted to but didn't because that felt too weird at the time), including some [fingers crossed] specific smut that i didn't write because i was too shy to write it at the time. i still am, but i'm hoping the February Me will be a little bit better at the nerves than Last Year Me was-- like, honestly, the amount of places i've tried to psyche myself up into putting this specific idea in has been astronomically high. i tried in DL... i tried in Succubus Giftin'... i tried in Color Coordinatin'... lord. maybe i'll take the chance this time.

alright, that's all i've got. let me know your thoughts-- if you have any suggestions for changes, or anything of the sort. this isn't the full list, but it's like, the big changes? the ones that i'm positive that i'm going to make? these are all the ones that have been super duper bothering me, at least, and are the ones i could immediately think of at the top of my head.

[liberty-barnes]

Letters To A Stranger

Peter Parker x Female!Reader

Summary: The story of a girl who loved a boy, but couldn't talk, so she wrote.

Warnings: fluff for a bit, but then massive angst, and i mean massive, STOP READING HERE IF YOU DON'T WANT ANY SPOILERS BUT I WOULDN'T FEEL OKAY WITHOUT LISTING ALL THE ANGST FACTORS 

(mentions of ED, mentions of self-harm, implied character death, mentions of social anxiety)

Word Count: 1.3k words

Estimated Reading Time: 5 minutes

A/N: did you miss me?

Masterlist 

February 21st, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

Are you new? Or was I simply too oblivious to your presence until now? I've never seen you before, you're really pretty.

 I don't think I've ever used the word "pretty" to describe a man before. Well, boy, but my point stands.

But you really are. With your caramel eyes, and artistically tousled hair. You're cute. Kind of like a puppy. Not that I'm attracted to dogs, of course, but there's really no better way to describe you. Your face lights up when you talk on the phone, like an excited golden retriever who'd just been told he was going for a walk. I wonder who you're talking to. Is it your partner? Please, say you're single.

You get off after me apparently, so I guess I'll just keep my pining to my letters and hope to see you again tomorrow.

Kinda wishing I was yours,

Your secret admirer.

February 22nd, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

You're back! Is this a simple coincidence or are you a regular? 

From the backpack on your shoulder, I'd say maybe you're a student. I don't go to school. You make me wish I did if only to see your face every day for more than the short ten minutes of our joint ride.

I wonder how old you are. You look old enough to be in high school, but which year are you? I know I'm only nineteen, but I'd feel a little bummed about crushing on a fourteen-year-old.

You're smiling again today. I'm glad. I don't see a lot of smiles at the diner. Mostly glares, impatient huffs, and tired, distant expressions. It's a nice change.

I have to go now but thank you for making my day.

Hoping to see you again tomorrow, 

Your secret admirer.

February 23rd, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

I'm starting to think that smile is permanent. It's the third day in a row that I've gotten on the train and was immediately greeted with your beaming smile as you watched some video on your phone. It made me smile too.

Your sweatshirt's pretty. It says "Midtown Tech" on it. Is that a school? Is it your school? 

I may have to do some digging later.

Please don't think I'm a stalker.

Your totally not-stalker secret admirer.

March 1st, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

I was late this morning so I didn't get to see you. My boss was not happy about it, I felt like I was walking on very thin ice.

And then this guy grabbed my ass while I was taking his order. I acted on instinct, tried to remember everything they taught me at my self-defense class. I ended up accidentally punching him in the face. 

So yeah, I lost my job today. Which is why I'm here so early. I might stay on the subway just to see which stop you get off on. 

Yeah, maybe not, that'd be weird and I should start job hunting as soon as possible.

Thank you for making me smile on a bad day.

Thank you for being you,

Your secret admirer.

March 17th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

I got a new job! I'm working at this coffee shop/bookstore and it's honestly the greatest thing in the world. I get to be around books AND get free hot chocolate, how much better can life be?

You looked a little down today, I wonder if you're okay? Is everything well at home? Maybe school's the problem? Maybe you got a bad grade, but you look really smart so I don't know.

I hope you're feeling better tomorrow,

Your secret admirer.

March 19th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

I wish I knew your name, that way I'd know who to address this to. But I guess Cute Boy On The Subway will have to do. 

You were smiling again today, that's nice. I haven't seen you smile in a while, I was starting to get worried. The sweater you were wearing looked a little too big to be yours, the collar slipped down a little when you moved. It looks like there's a massive bruise on your upper chest. Does it hurt? Are you okay?

I wish I was brave enough to ask you in person.

Get better soon, 

Your secret admirer.

March 25th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

You're back to not smiling today. I don't like to see you frown. Not at all. I want you to tell me what's wrong. I want to help you get better, see you smile again.

I want to talk to you.

I'll do it tomorrow, 

Your secret admirer.

March 26th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

You were sad again today. But that's okay, cause I said I'd talk to you. 

Except I didn't.

My stomach started doing uncomfortable flips and I had to get off the train earlier than usual so I could throw up. It was not fun. 

Maybe I just have the flu?

Hopefully, I'll be better tomorrow,

Your secret admirer.

March 30th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

I've tried talking to you for three days, every time I had to get off and empty my stomach's content. I started to see a pattern so after a half week of that vicious cycle, I went to see my doctor.

Turns out I have social anxiety tendencies and you simply trigger them a bit. So, basically, my body won't let me talk to you.

I'm a little sad but also kind of relieved. At least I know I'm not voluntarily letting you slip through my fingers.

Not that I ever plan on doing that, you've become too important.

I hope you smile tomorrow,

Your secret admirer.

April 7th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

I'm worried about you. Your sleeve rose a little when you held onto the pole. There are scars there, familiar ones, ones that I recognize as scars left by one's own hand. Physical marks of a person's suffering.

Why are you doing that? It hurts to know that you feel down enough to resort to that. I want to help, but I can't bring myself to talk to you.

Please stop this,

Your secret admirer.

April 12th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

Your eyes were red today. You've been crying. There are dark circles under your eyes, how long has it been since you've last slept?

A lady asked you if you were alright. You said you were just a little tired. I've never heard a more obvious lie.

I wish I could talk to you,

Your secret admirer.

April 16th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

The dark circles haven't gone away, if anything they've gotten darker. But now there's a bruise on your cheek. You seem to be getting thinner too.

What's going on?

Your secret admirer.

April 28th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

How much weight have you lost? Your cheekbones are more prominent, and your arms are getting thinner by the second. Why don't you eat? 

The bruises are more frequent now. Cheek, eyebrow, lip... 

Who's hitting you?

Who's making you suffer?

Your secret admirer.

May 6th, 2024

Dear Cute Boy On The Subway, 

I haven't seen you in a few days. I wonder where you are.

Are you okay?

I'm sorry, that's a stupid question, you probably aren't.

I've decided that next time I see you I'm gonna talk to you. Ask you what's wrong. Force you to tell me if that's what it takes.

I hope you're safe.

Your secret admirer.

May 27th, 2024

Dear Peter Parker, 

I'm sorry I wasn't brave enough to talk to you when I had the chance.

I hope you're in a better place now.

I'm sorry you were alone when you did it.

I'm sorry you had to do it.

With love,

(Y/n).

yes, i'm one of those authors that post something an then disappears for two months, i'm sorry. i've been super busy with school and i haven't really had the motivation to write lately but i got this idea and i just needed to get it out.

also, i may be getting a new computer in like 1 or 2 weeks, so that's cool! it'll be better to write and stuff cause this one's getting kinda slow and sometimes it's hard to post stuff cause it won't load lmao.

anyway, i hope you liked it and if you did don’t forget to reblog/comment/like

love you all!

-Miah

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────» 

Taglists: (if your name is striked through it means for some reason tumblr wouldn’t let me tag you) 

PERMA TAG 

@jeezkiddo​ @officiallyunofficialperson​  @beananacake​ @theunderlier @harrysleftchelseaboot​ @averyfosterthoughts​ @onebigolemess​ @samoney69​ @agirlwithpointlessideas​ @ddaawwssoonn​ @inhumanwithpowers​ @imagineshere-forall​ @stiles-banshees​ @orowit​ @spideynut​ @deathofmissjackson​ @parkersbliss​ @ephemeral-limerences​ @write-from-the-heart​ @cardboard-ben​ @my-alignment-is-bisexual @mendes-marvel​ @timotayswriter​ @inthecornerchair​ @lovelynerdytraveler​ @niallssweetheart22​ @incorrect-things​ @lost-in-the-stars03​ @harishaanne​ @ellamw04 @bisexual-disappointment​ @onelovesr​ @ellyseveronica​ @sovereignparker​ @notsosmexy​ @theamazingtomholland​ @lozzypoz321​ @peterspideyy​

PETER PARKER TAG 

@dreaming-lia @markleehee​ @juliebean247​ @quechulitaaa​ @bubblegumbarnes​ @sofiaconlaz​ @bellaaa321-blog​ @parkerpetertingle​ @emily-louise-hynes @clara-licht​ @ekelly2015​ @inlovewithmobtom​ @quaksonhehe​ @danicarosaline​ @tutuabby28​ @sovereignparker​ @spn67-sister​ @t-monosapiens-h @kayleypaige2233​ @galaxystern08​ @highlydisfunctional1​ @jillanaholland​ @zeusmyster​ @sirtommyholland​ @a-singleboat​ @allthisfortommy​ @middevil456 @kdotcxz​ @drishtisikarwar 

MARVEL TAG 

@dreaming-lia @emily-louise-hynes @arts-ismything​ @peachyafshawn​ @cathwritestragediesnotsins​ @spn67-sister​ @t-monosapiens-h @galaxystern08​ @highlydisfunctional1​ @jillanaholland​ @hyluas @ravenagrimes @captainbuckyy​ @kaylig02​ @crazyassbitch-things-blog @sharenaloveyouX @tacobacoyeet​ @andycanbeemotional​ @angelicromanoff 

[marshmallow-phd]

Nine Little Letters

Genre: College AU, Fake Dating AU, To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before AU

Inspired By: This graphic made by @rcse-tvler​

Pairing: EXO x Reader

Summary: Just when you thought life was done shoving you down, it got much, much worse. After finding out that your latest crush was already in a relationship, you did what you always did when emotions ran high: you wrote a letter. Signed and sealed, you put it away with the eight other letters you’d written to past one-sided loves, never to be seen again. That is, until a mix up accidentally sends those letters out to their respective recipients and you find yourself in the middle of one confusing web of love. With fake relationships, insecurities, and revelations swirling around, things are bound to get a little messy.

Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I 11

The second letter you ever wrote was perhaps the most embarrassing of them all.

During the summer of your thirteenth year, Baekhyun had gone away to a summer camp that had lasted for over a month. Bored to tears due to the missing antics, you spent more time with your other friend, Yeonhee, though - as much as you loved her - her presence didn’t have the same level of comfort as Baekhyun’s did. You weren’t sure what the reason was, but there always seemed to be this invisible barrier between you and Yeonhee. You couldn’t get quite as close to her. There was so much relief the day that Baekhyun came back. But something else was there, too. Something that had been growing throughout the absence.

At first, you thought your heart was beating fast because you ran to the park where Baekhyun told you to meet him. You were excited - elated - to have your best friend back. When you saw him lying on the teeter-totter, you stopped. His skin was sun-kissed, hair a bit longer and tousled. You’d never realized how… handsome he was before. Your face was smiling before you knew it.

You liked him. That had to explain why you missed him so much, right? As soon as Baekhyun saw that you’d arrived, he lit up, jumping off the playground equipment and running towards you. He pulled you into a quick hug then stepped back, ruffling your hair.

“I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.”

“Come on.” He grabbed your hand and started pulling you away from the teeter-tatter. “Let’s go down to the creek!”

You followed him without hesitation, loving the feeling of his hand in yours. Later that night, you tossed and turned, unable to sleep because of this new information. At thirteen, you were a bit smarter than you were at ten, so you decided to put some feelers out. You would see if there was any chance that he felt the same way. The two of you were close, after all. The chance had to be there, didn’t it?

The answer was no. And you received that answer almost immediately. The next day Baekhyun went on and on about this girl he had met at camp. He talked about how funny she was and cute and playful. And beautiful. He wouldn’t stop talking about how pretty he found her. She was at a summer camp, for Pete’s sake, but somehow still managed to be soft and delicate and everything Baekhyun liked in girls. It felt like an uppercut punch to the jaw. You could be soft and delicate. You wore skirts and boots and cardigans. Your room was pastel colors! What was the difference between you and this girl he rambled on about?

Flashing back to Jongin and how much better you felt after writing him the letter, you sat down at the table while your parents were away at work and tried to see if it had the same effect.

 Dear Baekhyun,

How are you? I guess that’s an awkward thing to ask given how I always know how you are. You always tell me, whether you’re happy or sad or simply indifferent. You tell me everything. And I’ve always loved that, the fact that we could tell each other whatever we’re thinking. But lately, you’ve been telling me too much and I’ve been keeping quiet. You tell me so much about this girl you met at camp and how much you like her and what the two of you talked about on the phone last night and how you’ve made plans to meet up next week. You go on and on about her without seeing the hurt in my eyes. I stay silent because of that hurt. Because while you were away, I realized something. I realized that I like you. As more than just my best friend. I find myself wishing that you were talking about me that way. What does this girl have that I don’t, anyway? She sounds a lot like me. I even wondered at one point if you were secretly talking about me until you mentioned meeting up with her. You seem so happy, though. So, I wonder, should I say anything or should I just go on being just your friend? I guess I'll make the decision at the end of this letter. If I send it out or if I keep it hidden in my drawer. Do I come out and say it or do I risk forever thinking “What if?” Only time will really tell. Either way, I hope you’re happy. That’s most important.

Love,

(y/n)

 In the end, you decided not to mail it. Though you never met the girl from summer camp, Baekhyun ended up “dating” her for the fall semester of school - if it could be counted since they lived in different cities. He always went to see her, but she never made the same effort. That was why they broke up, according to Baekhyun. Though he never came to see you in the same light as far as you were aware, you found that you were able to move on, to see him once again simply as your friend. Perhaps the two of you were soulmates in the platonic way. You were thankful to your past self for not mailing out that letter. Where would your friendship be if you had sent it? Would there even still be a friendship?

“Okay, I know you’re not a professional or anything, but you’re even worse today. What’s going on?”

You blinked, coming out of your head just in time to watch your character crumple to the ground, dead. Great.

You weren’t the best at video games, but you found them fun and Sehun didn’t mind if you weren’t as good as him. He definitely carried the two of you in the team rounds.

“Nothing, I just have a lot on my mind.” Both the truth and a lie. You were mildly distracted at the moment. It was a small amount of connected things. Seeing Junmyeon with a girlfriend had conjured up some old insecurities. While you were fairly sure that you were over him, you were circling around your lack of love life - and lack of dating history. As in zero. Zip. A big old goose egg. Of course, when that happened, you tended to retreat into your books and movies. Which rom-coms you were going to binge tonight was currently at the forefront of your mind, held up by everything else.

“So, obviously, it’s not nothing,” Sehun pointed out over the headset. Touché.

“Okay, it’s not nothing, but it's not something you’d be interested in anyway.”

“Try me.”

You paused. “I was thinking about how I’ve never had a boyfriend, so I was going to watch romantic comedies tonight.”

Silence.

Well, not total silence since the video game was still on in the background, but there was no response from your partner. “Sehun?”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m not that interested. But I also don’t see how watching movies about romance is a direct response to not having a boyfriend.”

You sighed as your character re-spawned and you continued with the game, covering Sehun from any surprise attacks as you inched closer to enemy territory. “They make me feel better.”

He took a pause to kill an enemy soldier before replying, “I still don’t get it. How can watching fake couples get together make you feel better? If you want a boyfriend, why don’t you go out and get one? It’s not like there isn’t a whole campus full of single guys.”

You scoffed. Yeah, right. Like it was that simple. There wasn’t a store or a catalogue that you could flip through and go “Oh, I’d like that one!” and have a boyfriend ready and raring to go. Although… someone should get on that revolutionary idea. It could be worth millions.

Part of you wanted to respond with “Fine, do you want to date me?” but you bit your tongue, knowing that you didn’t mean it. There had once been a time that you had thought about Sehun in that way. The two of you rarely saw each other in person. For a good year and a half, the two of you had been simple online buddies until you realized you lived in the same city. You’d invited Sehun along to outings with Baekhyun and Yeonhee, but they didn’t click very well, so it didn’t happen too often. After the first time you met Sehun, you thought he was cute. Que the letter.

 Dear Sehun.

I know you try to hide it, but you’re actually very sweet. And I know that you let me win sometimes. And you help me every chance you get. I like you because of that. Also, I never thought you would be cute. Is that bad? Do you think you could like me back? We could be that gamer couple. Those who play together, stay together, right?

Love,

(y/n).

 It was the cringiest of all your letters. Short, uninteresting, bland. After you wrote it, you realized quickly that those were the only reasons you liked him: his face and he was nice to you. Were your standards really that low? His letter always stayed at the bottom of the pile, hardly ever revisited. That was when you realized it was hard to truly like someone you didn’t know all that well. You still considered him a friend and could confide in him, but he didn’t make your comfortable triangle a square.

“Hey, (y/n)!” Baekhyun burst into your room with no warning. You jumped, letting out a rare curse into the headset.

“Baekhyun, what are you doing here?” On Saturdays he was usually busy giving piano lessons.

“And on that note, I’m out.” Sehun clicked off without a real goodbye. You shook your head. Boys.

You turned off your console and swiveled around in your chair. Baekhyun was seated at your vanity which made you nervous. He knew better than to go peeking into your things, but that hardly stopped him. And while he was aware of the letters’ existence, he was neither aware of his own nor where they were located.

“My pupil for the day canceled on me. They’re sick. I was bored so I came over. As per usual.” Looking over his shoulder at your mirror, he plucked off one of the pictures you had wedged into the frame. “Heard from your long-distance boyfriend lately?”

“Hardy, har-har.” You snatched the picture from him and replaced it. “He’s not my boyfriend and you know it.”

Zhang Yixing was your pen pal from high school. After seeing a flyer on one of the bulletin boards in the hallway, you jumped at the chance to communicate with someone from another country without really thinking about it. The partners were all chosen at random and you considered yourself quite lucky. The person you exchanged letters with was sweet and funny and really read what you wrote to him, always replying to your words before going into his own story. While life got in the way and the two of you weren’t able to exchange letters at the frequency you once had, you still received a surprise every so often.

And yes, before anyone asks, he was one of the nine. One look at his dimpled smile and charming eyes and anyone would be hooked. You’d giggled like crazy when you opened the letter junior year and his photo fell out. He’d wanted to show you the countryside school he’d volunteered at and the kids he’d helped. As cute as those children were, he was all you could look at. So, naturally, there was one letter you never sent. It didn’t make sense to send it. He was in an entirely different country. So, you used his letter as camouflage, keeping it on top at all times to hide the others underneath.

“And no, by the way. I haven’t gotten a letter for a little bit.”

“Too busy volunteering?” Baekhyun quipped.

“You could take a page out of his book, you know.”

“I do give back! I give free lessons all the time!”

Okay… that was true. Baekhyun did have a soft heart for kids that wanted to learn to play the piano but whose parents couldn't afford to pay for lessons. About twice a month on Sundays, he went to a local church and taught a class for anyone who wanted to join. It was actually kind of sweet. You’d gone a few times and he could be pretty adorable with the kids.

“Alright,” you said. “What do you want to do?”

“I don’t know.” Baekhyun pursed his lips and tapped a finger against his chin. His eyes slowly made their way around your room. He would smile when his eyes landed on pictures of the two of you or little souvenirs from your various adventures. Your room was like a scrapbook for the world to view. You enjoyed being surrounded by memories, like reading a book based on your life. “I’m kind of hungry.”

“Okay,” you laughed. “For what?”

He turned away from you, mostly still listening, but obviously distracted by something. “Let’s go to a grill.”

That suggestion sent sparks off in your brain. Your stomach, which had been neutral up until now, was roaring for the sizzling meat and spicy side dishes. In fact, you’d been distracted at the thought of a Korean grill that you didn’t notice Baekhyun’s hand twitching on the forbidden drawer. Before your brain could process what he was doing, the drawer was open. Baekhyun pulled the entire stack of letters out.

“Wow, you actually do keep all of these!”

“What the hell are you doing!” You bounced on him, tackling him down to the floor as you wrestled the envelopes from him. Once you finally pulled them free, you smacked his arm with the stack. “You jerk! You know those are private!”

He actually had the audacity to pout. “I just wanted to see!”

“They’re not for you to see!”

“Come on, (y/n),” Baekhyun sat up when you moved off him. You kept the envelopes close to your chest in case he tried for them again. “I thought I was your best friend.”

“Don’t you dare try to guilt trip me,” you snapped. “I have a right to my privacy. These aren’t meant for anyone else but me.”

“Fine.” He threw his hands up in defeat. “But you might want to find a better hiding spot. Let’s go eat.” He left your room, smiling to himself.

Grumbling to yourself, you placed the envelopes on your vanity. Later, you would find a better place to put them. For now, though, you draped a shirt over the stack so they were mostly covered.

You forgot about the letters for the most part by the time the two of you made it to the restaurant. Baekhyun had his moments where he didn’t think things through or he acted purely on impulse, but you could forgive those happenings. At least, when he was paying for dinner. On the way to the grill, you called Yeonhee to join.

“So, there’s this girl in my World Music three-oh-four class,” Baekhyun said right after shoving a stuffed sesame leaf into his mouth. “She’s really cute. And plays the cello. Her fingers are so nimble and small.”

“So, you going to ask her out?” you teased.

Baekhyun took some time to chew his food before answering. “Yeah. Actually, I think I might.”

“Does she seem interested in you?” Yeonhee asked. She was always the more practical one out of the three of you. She saw things in black and white. She either chose door number one or door number two. It was a philosophy she used in every aspect of her life. That realism rounded your little triangle out. Baekhyun was the carefree, never-knew-what-he-was-going-to-do-next type, you were the slightly anxiety-ridden, romantic daydreamer, and Yeonhee was the down-to-earth, rational one.

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Okay. Then do it.” Yeonhee pulled her long, dark brown hair back into a scrunchy to keep it out of her face. To her, that was the end of it.

Baekhyun sent you a look, but he shrugged. “Alright. I’ll see her on Monday, so I’ll ask her to coffee then.”

Your phone vibrated against the table. Normally you would have ignored it, but given the lull in conversation, you checked to see the notification. It was a text from your mom.

I’m doing laundry. It looks like you have a full hamper. Do you want me to take some?

You smiled. You loved getting out of laundry. Yeah! Thank you!

Okay! A second text came through. Do you want me to take this shirt on the vanity, too?

Shirt? What- Panic swept through you. No! That’s okay! It’s clean.

Okay! Love you!

Love you, too!

Phew. That was close.

The rest of dinner was spent talking about classes and professors and new movies coming out. The three of you bounced from subject to subject, spending a good hour and half at the table slowly devouring the different meat courses. Multiple groups came and went while you sat there and enjoyed this time with your two best friends. When it was time to go home, Yeonhee volunteered to take you home since it was more on her way than Baekhyun’s. Once there, she parked in your driveway. Rounding the car, you bent down to tell her goodnight. A second or two later, Kyungsoo pulled into his parents’ driveway. He got out of his own car, eyes down on his phone. Noticing the two of you next door, he froze. There was an awkward tension as the exes made eye contact while you stood there like an unneeded third wheel on a bike. Finally, Kyungsoo broke the contact and went inside.

“Have you talked to him lately?” you asked.

Yeonhee shook her head. “Not at all. What’s the point? I ended it. Going back and opening the wound makes no sense.”

“Yeah, that’s understandable. I’ll, um, I’ll talk to you later.”

“Yeah, see ya.”

You straightened up and headed inside.

Yeonhee and Kyungsoo were a tragic story, at least in your eyes.

Kyungsoo was your next-door neighbor for your entire life though the two of you didn’t interact very often. He ran in different circles and seemed annoyed by Baekhyun most of the time - a pattern you were not blind to. But Yeonhee always took the time to talk to him if you happened to be in the front yard and crossed paths. Oblivious to what was going on while they conversed, you stood by, studying your neighbor.

He was handsome and sweet when he wasn’t frowning. In fact, his smile was quite stunning. And he was smart and, though rare, cracked jokes that had you in stitches. You found yourself admiring him. Imagine your shock when you discovered that he was dating one of your best friends. You were devastated. The strength of the feeling took you by surprise. But you’d managed to keep it together in front of both of them. Only when you were alone were you finally able to let it out. That night you’d locked yourself in your room, tears flowing in an unending stream. At some point, you were sitting down at your vanity, pencil flying across the page without you having to think it through.

 Dear Kyungsoo,

What am I even feeling right now? How am I feeling like this? You were always just my neighbor, the boy next door. Occasionally kind, helpful. I never even suspected that you liked Yeonhee or that she liked you back. I was completely left out, blind to what was happening in front of me. Mostly because I couldn’t see past myself. You were nothing like how I’d thought in our younger years. You are so much more. Amazing feels like too simple a word but that’s all I can conjure up. I’ve been so in awe that I couldn't completely understand what it was that I was feeling inside. But now… I feel like my heart has shattered. I had come to look forward to talking to you in between our yards. I never suspected you were coming out for Yeonhee. You chose her over me. I’m sure in your eyes, I was never even one of the selections. But why? Am I really that invisible?

You are a wonderful person. I’m not sure if there are enough adjectives in the world to describe how I see you. You’re like a portrait in the Louvre, unable for me to touch. You’re out of reach. And now that you’re with Yeonhee, you always will be. I know that you’ll treat her well. You’ll keep her hand warm with your own like I wish you could with mine. When she’s tired, she’ll rest her head on your shoulder. I hope you’re a comforting pillow. You seem like that kind of person. A comfort, a stronghold. I wish you could have been mine.

Love,

(y/n).

 They dated for two years before Yeonhee inexplicably ended the relationship. You knew she would have a very logical, analyzed reasoning for why she abruptly broke it off, though she never told you or anyone. However, you were surprised with how angry you were at her. How could she do that to someone like Kyungsoo, who had never treated her badly even for a moment? Your sympathy lied with him, but you had to show support for your friend. She wanted to move on, so you pretended to understand. She didn’t come around very often anymore in case of situations like tonight where she might accidentally run into or see him.

Up in your bedroom, you took a deep breath. Because it still hurt after all this time. You still longed to be the one he looked at, the one he wanted to see. Out of all your letters, his was the one that never worked. His was sealed up tight, but the feelings didn’t go away. They held on tight like a rock climber without a rope. You could distract yourself with other crushes, give in to fleeting feelings for others. And it would work for a little while. But in your weak moments, those feelings never failed to come back. Tonight was a reminder of that.

[askaceattorney]

Dear Asexual-Deesasters,

Mod Edgeworth: 

If you want to know the answer to that question, go to this link.

Dear Skibot99,

Co-Mod: I’m fairly certain it was The Mod, but I don’t know for sure.  He actually had another one before it, made from an old Ace Attorney musical animation.  I haven’t been able to locate that video, unfortunately, but here’s the old banner:

Ah...  Those were good days.  Good days.

Dear Dawsongfg,

Co-Mod: It’s fine.  Besides, it won’t be too long before those letters are accepted, so maybe we’ll hold onto them until that time.

Dear skibot99 again,

Mod Edgeworth: The Lost Turnabout hands down. All logic is thrown out the window the moment Phoenix had amnesia. It’s clear the Judge knew something was wrong with Phoenix, so why didn’t he call for a recess or check on Phoenix? Not to mention Wellington was annoying. He’s probably the only character I would be hesitant to play as when answering letters, if only because he was so unbearable.

As for Turnabout Ablaze, I do agree that it is a drag to get through in the end, though the entire game of AAI was boring, aside from the game mechanics. As a case by itself, I wouldn’t put it as my least favorite, if only because I did get some funny parts out of it.  It also contributed to the overall story, whereas The Lost Turnabout could just be taken out and it wouldn’t effect the overarching plot.

Co-Mod: I’d probably have to go with Turnabout Big Top.  I honestly couldn’t figure out the part where you have to present Max’s poster without consulting a walkthrough.  Why couldn’t we just present Max himself?  Besides that, the ending was largely underwhelming -- the murder weapon was hidden under Acro’s blanket the entire time, but instead of seeing a screenshot of it there, we just have to imagine it.  Maybe it was a filler case, but that was no excuse for it to end so poorly.  Not to mention one of the witnesses was a literal puppet.

It’s hard truth, Trilo.  Live with it.

Dear skibot99 and Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: I… think I heard from her when the localization of DGS was announced? I know Mod Kristoph and Mod Maya introduced themselves when I came into the group. There’s a third person, but I only heard from her once. As for what’s going on with her… I don’t know.

As for the flooding the inbox, it’s fine. I won’t promise a letter or two won’t be deleted, but we may make an exception and I’d hardly consider 4-5 different letters flooding the inbox. However, I do highly suggest lowering your letter sending to no more than three a day to prevent deletion of your letters. The only time I’d say your letters are flooding the inbox is when you’re sending 10-20 of them, especially of the same letter, and we have to scroll down for a while to get to the next letter. We will only choose three out of that pile and delete the rest.

And yes, we do have a few that send us 10-20 of the same letter to multiple characters in the span of five minutes. Geez.

Co-Mod: Mod Paups has had to remain absent for personal reasons, and sadly, has recently communicated to me that she wishes to leave the blog entirely.  Thanks for all you’ve contributed to this blog, Mod Paups, and best of luck in whatever you do next!

(Referenced Letter)

Dear mungeondaster,

Mod Edgeworth: Since I answered this one, I shall answer your letter.

(^ Why do I always use this sprite? ^) Actually, the localization never specified if Manfred Von Karma was born in Germany or not. In fact, we never knew the German part until Justice For All when Franziska Von Karma was stated to have flown all the way from Germany. It never specifies any reason for this and fans were quick to jump to the conclusion that it means the Von Karma family were German, which… isn’t entirely true? Manfred Von Karma never said he lived in Germany and, for all we know, Franziska could’ve lived in Germany to study law or something.

Now, the OG does give us more specific detail on this, being why I answered this the way I did. In the OG, both Von Karma’s were born Japanese, but lived in America or at least have an estate there. It specified that they were originally born in Japan, which would be translated to LA, California in the localization. While using the OG canon isn’t normal here, I will use it, if the localization doesn’t specify things. In this case, it never specified if the Von Karma’s were born in Germany or if Manfred Von Karma lived in America. Since he had to wait out the Statue of Limitations for DL-6, we can assume he lived in LA for 15 years or more. That means he’s American.

I am still getting the hang of writing letters, but I try to stick to canon as much as possible. If you believe we’ve made an error in our letters, feel free to let us know, but also show proof, if we go against canon. We’ll be sure the letter is sent to the right mod or else fix it.

Dear  Bluedragoncody,

Mod Edgeworth: I... don’t know how to feel about that.

Also, I accidentally deleted your previous letter before this one when trying to post it on here. I’m so sorry about that. If you could remember it, would you send it again?

Co-Mod: I’ll just respond to this with an old classic:

Dear Aceattorneyismyjam,

Mod Edgeworth: I-I’m not a pro! I accidentally deleted an important mod question from bluedragoncody, because of my inexperience. Oof! Again, so sorry!

Granted, I am good with digital art and writing essays, but I’m still trying to get the hang of being a mod here. Believe me, I do get corrected on several mistakes I do here. I can’t really call myself a pro just yet. I’ve only just started becoming a mod here last month lol

Dear Dahlia,

Mod Edgeworth: I thank you for your support of this blog and my essay. Manfred Von Karma is also my favorite villain and someone I do feel is underestimated as a one dimensional villain. I think people hate him so much, because of how he ruined Miles Edgeworth’s life without looking at the bigger picture. They focus on the bad things with their black colored glasses without dissecting Manfred Von Karma’s character as a whole. 

One thing I love about this blog, even before becoming a mod, is that no one here ever portrayed Manfred Von Karma as the one dimensional villain. He can be snappy at times, but as proven in many of our previous letters, he’s also portrayed as being calm when threatened, polite at times and absolutely loves his wife and children. Yes, he’s a terrible person, but that’s what makes him so interesting. He’s a bad, evil person that does good things from time to time. It doesn’t justify any of his horrible deeds, murder included, but it does make him human.

Co-Mod: I’m...going to assume you’re a different Dahlia.  (I’m grabbing a Magatama of Parting just in case, though.  I’m sure you can understand.)

Anyway, thanks for being such a loyal follower!  This blog’s been through a lot of changes since it began, and since I joined it back in 2017, so I’m glad it’s still a good source of enjoyment for you.  I’ve seen all sorts of cringe by now, by the way (some of which I wrote myself), so don’t worry about it.

I’m also glad that the characters still sound like themselves and not like us.  The hilarious personalities and quirks given to them by Capcom’s writers, as well as the humanity in so many of them, make them easy to relate to, and thus fairly easy to mimic.  I may have said something like this before, but I see myself in a lot of them -- in Athena’s fear of inadequacy, in Apollo’s desire for justice in a world where it’s hard to find, in Sebastian’s confusion about where to go next after his world falls apart, and possibly even in the von Karmas’ desire for perfection.  I of course identify with their positive feelings as well -- Phoenix’s smugness when he gets things right, Athena’s joy after pulling off a victory in court, Adrian’s pride after her self-confidence is restored, etc. -- but there’s something about the struggles they face that make them easier to relate to, on top of being that much more awesome in the end.

Unfortunately, I can’t promise anything about this blog continuing on in perpetuity.  For one thing, I don’t plan on being around forever (I’m fairly certain the other Mods don’t, either), and for that matter, there’s also no telling how long Tumblr will be around.  All I can promise is that I’ll give my best while I’m here, and that the love from you and everyone else who shares it here is sure to be what keeps us going.  Thank you for your contribution!

Dear TurqouiseJavelin,

Mod Edgeworth: Hm... not bad ideas. Though, we mods choose our own mod names under the condition that it doesn’t match anyone else’s mod name.

Co-Mod: What Mod Edgeworth said.  Choosing the name “Mod Athena” may or may not increase your chances of being hired, though.  *wink, wink*

Dear Anonymous, 

Mod Edgeworth: Actually, Gregory was stated in the Autopsy to have died by a gunshot. However, you do bring up something interesting. If Gregory Edgeworth realized he was dead and last remembered Robert Hammond strangling him, he wouldn’t think “I died by the shot of a gun.” Since the Detectives weren’t aware that victim had died unconscious, they’d assume the victim would recall being shot and killed. This makes me wonder if Gregory Edgeworth was channeled, but never brought to court to be cross-examined.

There are still holes, but I do like your aspect on DL-6.

Co-Mod: Dang...  No matter how many times you come back to this game, there’s always something new to think about.  I honestly hadn’t considered those details about Yanni Yogi’s trial.  Your explanation makes the most sense to me, but there’s one other possibility regarding Gregory’s testimony -- he may have chosen to lie about who murdered him in order to protect his son from a murder charge.  That’s all open to interpretation, of course, so your guess is as good as ours.

It’s a good thing we’re not actual defense attorneys, huh?

-The Mods