#abuse ig

[crimeronan]

god i know i keep half-tongue-in-cheek saying that my dad is literally belos owlhouse but. i've apparently gotten a little desensitized to Just How Bad He Is (because i have ESCAPED, YAY) & so today has been a delightful adventure.

i wrote an AITA post from his POV about stuff that happened several years ago, bc i was curious about how bad he'd get dragged - i updated the timeline but the Only fact i changed was the reason for his Woes (i blamed COVID economic struggles, which actually makes him a Hero compared to the truth. the truth being so ugly i'm not gonna detail it here good god).

i kept it true to POV by only using things that he actually did say to me at the time about why he was doing the things that he was doing, & blocking out all the relevant info about why the wronged party (me) was so upset, & having him praise his daughter (me) and go "i love her so much :) she's so smart and independent and i would never hurt her :)", & having him half-assedly admit he might've sounded unreasonable/angry/malicious, in a way that was clearly supposed to earn Good Dad points for being so Willing To Admit Imperfections, despite a continued constant doubling-down refusal to answer questions about actual important shit or fix anything ever.

cannot emphasize enough that this was not a fictionalized/embellished/creative POV. the only points of fiction were 1) my dad did not write these things on reddit, he said them to me in real life word for word instead and 2) this happened many years ago, not like... yesterday.

anyway the thread blew up and the commenters were all so kind and genuinely worried for me (as in, the daughter) and offering so much help that i hopped on a diff account to be my past self so i could reassure people i'm okay & had a plan in motion for gettin' the hell outta dodge. because i felt REALLY BAD that they didn't know i..... did in fact get out. people were so nice it made me actually fucking cry jesus CHRIST. i had in fact perhaps forgotten that these things were all as bad and worrying as they were

now. this is all a very serious and harrowing-sounding prelude to the actual point of this post, which is. a bullet list of some of my FAVORITE FUCKING RESPONSES. revel in these with me i had so much fucking fun. i have taken DOZENS AND DOZENS of screenshots to peruse whenever i need a healthy dose of Perspective

here they r:

you are CARTOONISHLY EVIL?

HOLY ABUSE BATMAN

DO BETTER. RIGHT NOW.

did you even listen to yourself writing this. HOW

there's something seriously wrong with you. like on an intrinsic unfixable level

hey this happened to me too! my parent died and i had a party about it btw

your daughter is never going to speak to you again after this

(note from the future: yeah)

you're going to act confused and sad when she goes no-contact aren't you

(NOTE FROM THE FUTURE: HE SURE FUCKING IS)

i think you are creating your own problems and then getting mad at them. maybe instead you could not do that

is this ragebait. i can't imagine anyone this horrible actually existing

this isn't ragebait. i can tell this isn't ragebait because I Know This Kind Of Man So Intimately

you are the asshole on literally so many levels i'm going to write a 15 paragraph response line-by-line dissecting everything wrong with you

are you aware that you're lying or are you literally this incapable of 2 seconds of honest self-reflection

i need to donate to a gofundme for your daughter right now immediately

(note from the future: i am not going to scam people by pretending a long-done sitch is a current emergency on gofundme. have no fear.)

wow. okay i'm gonna go hug my mom and thank her for not being you

you are Actually Literally Empirically the Actual Literal Worst Parent who has Actually Literally Ever Existed

HOW FUCKING DARE YOU????

WHO DO YOU FUCKING THINK YOU ARE.

I AM A 57-YEAR-OLD MOM OF FOUR ADULT CHILDREN AND THE MERE THOUGHT OF DOING ANY OF THE THINGS YOU HAVE DONE HERE MAKES ME PHYSICALLY NAUSEOUS

these vibes are so skeevy. leave her the fuck alone????

along with ASTONISHINGLY accurate inferences about exactly what was happening with the daughter (me) in all the missing missing reasons & like..... exactly how the situation was So Much More Ugly And Horrifying than an innocently confused i'm-so-well-intentioned dad-POV post would have you believe.

so. anyway. that was literally the most validating experience i've ever had in my entire life. i know i've said he's a bad guy before but i also always forget just how far beyond the pale he is. like wow that was. that was not a normal average human experience to have growing up huh.

IN CONCLUSION.

if you guys are ever wondering why i am the way that i am about, like........ anything....... everything....... whatever......

just remember.

i was raised by belos owlhouse.

[zu-is-here]

the cream when it's getting dark or something,,

[zeropro]

Hi, what are your thoughts on Megatron? Most Starscream fans don't have very positive ones about him lol, but everyone is different and I would like to know that you think

I like Megatron okay, he doesnt bother me but im not like jumping up and down for megatron content yknow? but I get not liking Megatron as a Starscream fan. It's just, you can't deny how intrinsically the two characters are tied together. Really can't have Starscream without Megatron, which is unfortunate for someone like me who does not like drawing Megatron lol!

Maybe the reason most Starscream fans dont like Megatron is because of their abusive relationship? And let's be clear, due to the power imbalance, I do interpret it as an abusive relationship. Despite how much we like to joke that Starscream deserves the punishment he gets (I'm not entirely sure how attempted murder/political assassination attempts factor into an abuse allegory) no one ACTUALLY deserves to be abused. The fact that Starscream is low key also evil and has done evil things is a separate issue from Megatron's abuse of him, we can hold him accountable for the one while also having sympathy because of the other. For me personally tho? Megatron abusing Starscream doesnt make me dislike the character at all, it's honestly the main draw of the dynamic for me. Maybe I just like to see my blorbos suffer…

The G1 Cartoon Megatron is probably the most fun, and I think this dynamic is the most on the level in terms of Starscream dishing back as much as Megatron gives him. They're all just bullies on the playground, their toxic back and forths feel a lot more slap stick and silly than actual abuse. What makes it work I think is that Megatron is not as crazy powerful as he is in later continuities, and Starscream responds to the abuse like a cartoon villain, immediately bouncing back and plotting his revenge, so it's funny rather than upsetting! I also find it hilarious how Megatron is weirdly nice to all the other Decepticons who aren't Starscream lmao? G1 Cartoon Megatron is a 10/10 for me.

If G1 cartoon's Megatron and Starscream are more on an even playing field, Prime Megatron is like the opposite of that. Prime Megatron is so impossibly powerful it almost feels like no one has a chance against him in a fight, and Prime Starscream is so scrunkly and small it's almost laughable. I think I feel the most pity for Prime Starscream when he gets beat up by Megatron, but he almost always makes up for it by being possibly the most evil of the Starscreams. I like how in the third season, he genuinely seems happy to finally dedicate himself fully to Megatron, but you just know how much he'd been beaten down and broken over and over again to even get to that point. Good for him for trying to get revenge in the sequel series. As for Megatron himself, I think more often than not when I am reading fics I see Prime Megatron in my head, and it's his voice I hear. What can I say, it was the first Transformers show I watched haha. Do I love how his redemption arc was handled? Not particularly, it sorta came out of nowhere, felt really rushed, and he just goes away anyway so we don't even get anything out of it. I like redemption arcs in general, but I don't necessarily think this particular Megatron needed one.

To be perfectly honest, I didn't think the 2005 IDW Megatron deserved one either, only because when it comes to over powered, unstoppable, irredeemably evil Megatrons, this one ranked right up there if we take into consideration everything he did before Dark Cybertron. His redemption does kinda come out of nowhere. But like, idk mang! It's also really fun? Like, Bumblebee carrying him around cuz his pants got blown off is hilarious! Him actually upset at Bumblebee's death and then taking Bumblebee's Autobot badge and putting it on over his own was sweet! Him dealing with the crazy crew of the Lost Light is a lot of fun! And him actually having to confronting and deal with what he's done (and other characters dealing with him dealing with it) is a lot more interesting than just him dying. idk. The comics have been around for years by that point, and passed through the hands of many writers, so if a little handwaving and a little contrivance and a little suspension of disbelief is what is required for us to have an honestly pretty fun take on Megatron, I think I'm okay with that.

I do have one complaint tho, mostly based on content I haven't read yet so take it with a grain of salt. I have been told that the adjacent series to the Lost Light Megatron stuff covers Starscream's side of the story and that it does actually address his abuse at the hands of Megatron. My problem is that apparently (and again I haven't read that far yet so this is just hearsay, but apparently) the writers on the Lost Light Megatron stuff didn't get the memo so while Megatron feels bad for and is working at redemption for all the evil war stuff he did to everyone, the one thing he doesnt regret is apparently his treatment of Starscream? Haha, like come on! on the one hand it's really disappointing to me because id like the catharsis of Megatron’s remorse, but...on the other hand, I guess it's kinda true to life actually. Your abusers are people, and they can change and grow and become better, but it doesnt mean they will ever become better for you. It doesnt mean they will ever apologize or even feel bad for what they did. Maybe theres something to be said about having to move on and heal without that. I guess whether this is a complaint I maintain will depend on how its handled.

I get that some people don't think Megatron should ever get a redemption arch, because he's an abuser, a monster, a tyrant, and an evil warlord, and it's completely fair for your stance to be that he should just be killed and that would be justice. I personally really like continuities that treat him more like just some guy. I think Starscream put it best in 2005 IDW during Megatron's trial when he said Megatron wasn't some political genius or the most gifted strategist. He wasn't even the most evil man. In IDW, Megatron started out as a social advocate from the lower class, and despite the problematic narrative of "the bad guy had a point and just did advocacy wrong/went too far," I think the idea that Megatron kinda got swept up by his own hype and was used by people and powers more devious than he is a compelling one.

Starscream is Starscream, so who knows how much of what he says is true and how much is him lying, but this idea just rings true to me. It humanizes him. If handled well, I'm honestly not opposed to stories redeeming Megatron. I'm also not opposed to stories treating him like the devil and just killing him lol. I love a character that can do both!

Uh uh, what else. Earthspark Megatron is nice, I like him. There's...a bit of cognitive dissonance in trying to reconcile the things he chastises Optimus Prime for and the idea that he still was a ruthless warlord at one point, both of which continue to be left unexplored. Transformers One Megatron is neat, I was worried going in how they would handle the switch from Orion Pax's brother to lets start a 4-6 million year war, but like, I like the way he actually was super okay with accepting his lot in life. Like obviously he didnt like it but he didnt see a point in fighting it, and that adamant complacency as a coping mechanism is what lead to his feelings of rage and betrayal by the end. Also I think its hilarious how much younger he is from all the other Decepticon high command, especially Starscream XD.

I don't think I've read or watched anything else with Megatron in it. Man, I wrote a lot. At the end of the day, Megatron is a good character, I like the role he plays in Transformers, I'm not like actually that interested in him on his own but more what he brings to the table when considering Starscream's character. You can't have one without the other! Do I ship them? No, not really, no more than any other ship. But I'll still read Megastar stuff cuz sometimes you just want to watch two people be toxic and make it hurt so good. I'll always prefer Trine stuff anyway ha! Have fun out there!

[eznii]

something something white sheep luo binghe

[toffeebrews]

Dog coded cross, but like it's sad.

not sure what this genre of art I'm doing is, but I like it.

[helpallthenamesaretaken]

the attitude of the pjo fandom about tv!gabe is giving me flashbacks to that one ttc scene where percy meets frederick chase and he's like "annabeth told me you were abusive???why dont you look abusive??"

[crovvlipso]

>Disappears from tumblr for months

>Log in to art dump

>Refuses to elaborate

>Leaves

[dukeofthomas]

I hate the insistence in pushing Jason into the batfamily.

If he doesn't wanna go to dinner, he doesn't have to. If he doesn't wanna hang out with them, he doesn't have to. If he doesn't want to see them, he doesn't have to. If he doesn't even want to contact them, he doesn't have to.

It's so annoying to read fic and always see it presented as his Family Knows Better. Jason is just being silly by not realizing how much they love him and he just needs to let them break into his home and comms and life because they want him there.

[claudiadpdl]

imagine consuming a piece of media like iwtv and boiling it down to "the abuse show" and telling people they should kill themselves for caring about the romance of it (which is a fundamental part alongside the grieving and healing from the unavoidable loss of your child). i honestly do not know how someone could watch two entire seasons (assuming the books weren't read because there's no way you'd say something like that otherwise) and come away with that specific opinion. watching a fucked up show about fucked up people and an exploration of said fucked up-ness with this exhausting mindset of 'ethical correctness' only hurts you in the long run. and beyond that? media literacy needs to be a mandated class in grade school.

[starscream-is-my-wife]

A way too serious reading on Fire in the Sky focusing on Skyfire

The first impression we have of Skyfire is Starscreams vision of him. He says they were close friends before the war. Skyfire is portrayed as a representation of innocence, he is the last cybertronian to know what life was like before the war, and untouched by the horrors of it. When the actual Skyfire is revived, he is in the future in the middle of a war, where for him, he was just a while ago he was a civilian scientist. He knows that this isn’t Cybertron, subconsciously or not, he is essentially trapped with the Decepticons, and with Starscream, who despite saying they are close friends, Skyfire treats Starscream more like an acquaintance. However, Starscream is the only thing that he has left from his old life, so he would naturally stick with him

 It doesn’t take long for Starscream to establish control over Skyfire. Starscream who not only has a ranking superiority over Skyfire, but in life experience. He is 5 million years older, most of which was spent as a warrior, and as the second in command. He tells him that he will make Skyfire his second in command once he takes over. Skyfire thanks him, telling him that he will give Starscream credit. It makes you wonder if this is what their relationship was like before the war, if Starscream believes that being close friends means that someone is willing to be subservient to you.

Then his first encounter with the Autobots. This is where Skyfire is alone, and you can see his actual personality, albeit still under the manipulations of the Decepticons. They engage in combat but stop when Spike and Sparkplug are in danger. When Skyfire goes over to help them, he speaks very softly for the first time since his reactivation. A gentleness for organisms that shows his true calling as a scientist. He then tells them the lies that he was told, showing he does genuinely believe in what Megatron and Starscream told him, like he looks up to his superiors.

So, when Skyfire raises a protest to the treatment of the humans, Megatron warns him that he’s stepping out of line, but it was Starscream who tightens his leash. not hesitating to shoot his hand as a punishment. Starscream should know how Skyfire should love organics, but maybe he saw this as an opportunity to taint Skyfire even more. Skyfire was shocked but not to Starscream shooting him, but to why they wanted to harm the humans. He does not question being shot by Starscream at all, filling in a picture of them before the war even more. Skyfire had also said that these humans were his friends, despite most of their very brief meetings being the humans terrified of him. This also makes you think if Skyfire before had any real friends other then Starscream.

When cornering a group of Autobots, Starscream said that the years under the ice had diminished his loyalty coefficient. And once again you wonder, ‘how did Starscream treat Skyfire before??’

Even after acknowledging their old friendship, the moment Skyfire refuses Starscream, he once again, does not hesitate to shoot Skyfire for being ‘wrong’, the Autobots look on in horror for Skyfire, Ratchet and Hound even saying something about it before getting destroyed -in Skyfires eyes- by Starscream, who steps on him before walking off. Another display of establishing his control. In the very short time that he’s been reactivated, Starscream has already shot Skyfire twice for miniscule ‘mistakes’ and Skyfire doesn’t even question why he was punished so harshly by being shot, only thinking of others.

Ratchet fixes up Skyfire the best he can after revealing that they are functioning they get interrupted by Starscream who orders his trine to fire at will at the Autobots, not caring that they were fixing up Skyfire. Ratchet doesn’t leave Skyfires side, tugging at his hand and saying ‘I won’t leave you here’ before getting shot. Skyfire stirs, this is probably the kindest anyone has been to him after being frozen and losing everything he knows.

Skyfire does join the battle, on the side of the Autobots, finally seeing a way out from the Decepticon grasp, and literally throws Megatron away. He ends up fighting Starscream, who only a little while ago had such a positive view of Skyfire, is now willing to kill him permanently. It’s almost like he would rather have Skyfire dead then have a Skyfire who is alive, but does not fit the loyal subservient imaginary image he has of him in his mind.

Starscream has far more experience in battle and although they both crash, Starscream will show up next episode, totally fine. However for Skyfire, in his final moments, fires a blast to bury the crystals, and himself to save his new friends. Perhaps that’s all he knows, instead of landing safely, he did everything he could to be useful to the very end. But in doing this he found freedom from Starscream, in death.

(until he gets revived)

[brucewaynehater101]

The evil parent club thingy made me think about something if JJ did effect Tim to the point where he still thinks the joker and Harley are his parents imagine how it would impact his interactions and identity

Cuz Harley is good now so he could reasonably go to her and she was a therapist so she could help

But sometimes even if you hate a parent you still long to see them imagine how Tim would react to knowing that his mind sometimes wants him to just go to joker because his brain thinks joker is his dad still no matter how much he hates him

Tw: Abuse, torture, domestic abuse, brainwashing, child abuse, JJ

Yeah. The shitty part about domestic abuse is that it's not clear cut to the victim. Due to certain tactics (like love bombing), it may be hard for someone to realize that they are being abused or that it's the abuser's fault.

I haven't seen much of the Harley Quinn show, but I remember thinking that the first season showed this. Harley kept going back to Joker despite how he would hurt her. Leaving abusive relationships is grueling.

For Tim, he would know before and after the JJ period that Joker is a bad guy. A monster. Despite that, the brainwashing, electrocution, manipulation, etc. would be detrimental to his ability to be strictly rational. Add on that this happened when he was a kid and his brain was still developing?

It's understandable if Tim would have conflicting feelings about Joker and Harley. You're right that you can loathe your parents and still miss them. It is also reasonable that someone might miss their abuser due to emotional manipulation and other tactics employed. This is one of several reasons why people get stuck in a cycle of abuse.

For JJ specifically, I could go in depth about many layers. We could chat about why he would miss the Joker, the shame and confusion and horror he'd feel when he realizes it, his need to hide this realization from others, the many ways he may lash out or try to process his emotions/trauma, and overall how this would permanently change who he is as a person.

I think, and I am in no way a professional, that Tim would benefit from group therapy for domestic abuse victims. He wouldn't need to say who hurt him, but hearing others and their similar struggles may relieve some of the guilt and shame he feels. Due to his unique situation, he may need to be convinced that he does qualify for this group. Maybe Harley is the one to suggest it and support him. Maybe not.

She would not be able to be Tim's therapist due to her role in his abuse, their relationship, and her revoked license. However, she may still provide him support and care if Tim has enthusiastically expressed her presence as an aid rather than a trigger. Boundaries are important

[toringo]

i’m OBSESSED with your anti tulpar comics, i’ve been rotating them in my mind nonstop for the past few days! how do you think a!curly feels about a!jimmy?

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

You have no idea how happy it makes me to know, that people really enjoy those. I know it's not even my au, but I've been genuinely hyperfixating on it for some time now, and making up my own lore (obviously the creator doesn't mind, they said it's all up to interpretation).

My take on A!Curly's opinion of A!Jimmy and some A!Curly background and hcs:

He thinks Jimmy is weak, pathetic, and simply put a loser. He's annoying, easy to push around, and doesn't put up too much of a fight, which is good, because - hot take - A!Curly is just as much of a pushover as the canon one.

He puts on a mean face and abuses his power to put down the others, to make himself feel better (feel important and in control), but if someone shows that they can snap back he loses the fight quite easily.

He's a people pleaser, the top student with no personal life kind. It's just that he's looking for approval as a 'tough leader' now. You know, the epitome of masculinity with nerves of steel and 0 sensitivity.

People usually need 10 years of experience to become a captain, he got the title in half that time, unlike canon!Curly (If someone asks how it was totally natural and due to his stellar performance! Don't question it too much!)

He doesn't have anything much going on back on Earth, also unlike canon Curly. He distances himself from his family (never truly satisfied with his achievements) and has no close friends. He sees no point in making any now that he spends most of his time in space. Doesn't really believe in love, either.

He didn't pass the psych eval twice in a row and is on Pony Express approved (questionable) antidepressants/mood stabilizers. Still fit to fly!

With all that being said; he considers Jimmy an easy target and abuses him primarily because of that. He can't stand this weakling stumbling around all pathetic and apologetic, while he has to work so hard to keep up his reputation.

It pisses him off that some guy just… doesn't care that others see him like this. Curly would care, it would break him if anyone thought of him like they do of Jimmy! So it's annoying that this janitor doesn't even try.

A perfect excuse to make himself feel bigger, too; it's not like he's a bad guy. This loser needs to learn, after all, that people like him don't survive in a place like this.

It gets worse when he starts realizing, that Jimmy is putting up a front and is actually way more cunning and capable than people think. Makes him feel on edge, paranoid. Like Jimmy is there to make him spiral; like he was sent by his higher-ups to check on him.

Then he finds out Jimmy is actually an emergency pilot (not on any papers Curly had access to). Yeah, he hates his guts.

When they enter their 'relationship' (it's mostly very humiliating hate sex ngl), Curly gets to know him a bit better. He still resents him, even more knowing that Jimmy can be a cold and cruel man under the mask of submissiveness. And even more, when Jimmy shows just how little respect he has for his captain.

But it's… a relief, having someone know how you really are, seeing your 'worst self'. He kind of feels like with every small thing he reveals to Jimmy, he gives up a bit more of control and gives him more ammunition, but well. Bitches be lonely.

So they have this weird thing going on, where Curly abuses Jimmy in front of the crew and during work hours, to unwind and reassure himself about his position and vent the abuse he experiences from HIS higher-ups, and Jimmy abuses him in private (for many, many reasons. Also bc he's sadistic).

They both think that if they hurt the other enough, he will stop hurting them. They're wrong. Although Curly gives up more easily, and Jimmy goes overboard quite a lot (as he has nothing to lose, is an obsessive weirdo, and was keeping his mouth shut about what Curly was doing for so long that at this point all the years of hatred are spilling out. He also has a personal vendetta against Curly, because he admired him and wanted to befriend him before he became a captain (and had any power over him) and Curly just started treating him like trash soon after getting the title).

YEAH sorry I will talk more about it later, sorry for being chaotic - they're just awful and disgusting and need to be put on some kind of meds (Curly's pills don't count)

[mattastr0phic]

Such a pain to have to reiterate that if anyone tags my shit with Br*ght (this includes ship names, etc.) you just get blocked. My wife Dr. Myriad is so much better than that carrot cuck and nothing anyone does will ever change my mind!

Please learn to check tags or even read pinned before you reblog!

[calebsrottingcorpse]

cross-posting this to Tumblr rq because I’m ill rn

[nana-mizu-shiki]

Oh No, the thing that I just said is apparently one of the things that other people Don’t Think Is Okay that I didn’t realize, and Now I’ve Made People Sad And They’re Wasting Emotions On Me, but it’s FINE, really, it is.

Tim is so me here

This is in a later chapter, but I loved the fic, especially the way it ended and the way the characters developed. This fic really went into stalker and photographer Tim btw, so if you like that, 👍 👌