#about queer identity?

[musical-chick-13]

Now that I'm on this, I think one of the big problems I have with just going, "It's queer!" about a piece of media is that it's always, "there is a queer character in a (usually same-gender) romantic relationship" and not "this queer character exists in a major story capacity and is allowed a lot of interesting narrative choices." The implication is usually that what makes a piece of media queer is "a specific kind of romantic relationship" and not "the presence of canonically queer characters."

[anneapocalypse]

So, just curious how many writers and creators will have to be forcibly outed by relentless harassment before we acknowledge that "This queer characters was written by a cishet person and that's why they're bad" is not good criticism.

[nothing-an-iratze-cant-fix]

I’m curious - people always seem surprised that multiple siblings are queer, as if it’s amazing the gay lightning struck twice so close together.

But human variation is down to our genes and external factors. Siblings are logically more likely to both/all be queer than not.

So a wee poll if you don’t mind!

Anyone can take part, there should be an option for anyone but please let me know in notes if I missed anyone.

For reference: queer is anyone who wouldn’t describe themselves as heterosexual or cis-gendered or allo-sexual. Anyone we would include in the queer group. And if you’re not including people by their own identification, we can have words after…

Notes:

If you only have one sibling use the relevant all option.

If you have an issue with the word queer I truly don’t want to hear about it - that’s your choice, this is mine.

Reblog if you fancy! If you don’t then no worries, but if you can it would be nice to get a lot of replies!

And hey everyone, happy Pride!

[jesncin]

Happy Pride! Now that Lunar Boy (our middle grade graphic novel) is out, we wanted to share our thought process behind queer vocabulary in media. The constant censorship, imposed western biases on queer culture, and what it means to introduce queer vocabulary to a young audience.

Check out Lunar Boy wherever american graphic novels are sold, or check it out at a library!

[incognitopolls]

Labels listed in these options are meant as examples, not a comprehensive list. Please choose the answer that you feel best fits you, and feel free to elaborate in the tags.

–

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[trans-androgyne]

So glad to have the language of "identity determinism" now, because it negatively influences trans spaces so heavily. It's where we see narratives like "being a trans man means you were afab, you were raised to be feminine, you want to transition to look like a cis man, and you have male privilege." Sure, that describes a lot of trans men. But gender and identity are complicated. People can be intersex, be raised in an unusual environment, be gnc, be non-passing, etc. Your identity does not determine everything you've been through or how others, especially bigots, perceive and treat you, and believing it does causes a lot of harm. Leave it up to the person to tell you what their experiences are; you cannot simply assume it from their identity.

[bonemeal12]

The urge to put The Guy in creepy Pinterest bathrooms is real… and I have no self control

[knifearo]

ultimately when it comes to shipping and fandom space treatment of aspec characters i just don't accept "aro/ace people can still date/have sex" as an answer from nonaspecs. like yeah. mhm. okay. now i think we both know that you're not saying that out of real interest in the diversity of aspec experiences. so you can turn in your seventeen-page essay on why and how you plan to examine this character's aspec identity within the context of a romantic or sexual relationship complete with evidence from canon and peer reviews from multiple aspec people within the next week or i'm putting you in the pit from the edgar allen poe story

[bossymarmalade]

When I was 19 in the mid-90s the internet was not a readily available thing to explore your curiosities about sex, so I used to phone up a sex line and make an account, leave a message in a boy voice, and see what kinds of propositions older men would leave in my mailbox. Your aunties did their gender identity research in their own ways

[future-crab]

It's been said before, it will be said again, but it's still worth saying: the fact that art centering on straight romance is allowed to just be bad, but art with queer romance in it always has to be indicative of A Serious Problem With the Way We Tell Queer Stories makes being a queer person making queer art deeply stressful

[bunnyboy-juice]

NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???

[agendercryptidlev]

Thinking about how Riz is the one who first used he/him pronouns for Baron & what it's like being AroAce is a queer space. Thinking about Riz seeing the kinship that Raugh and Kristen formed over both being gay and wanting that connection, that sense of community, but holding himself back because while he wasn't "normal" he also wasn't like them. When you're gay you're family and when you're straight you fit in but what happens when you're neither? How do you categorize that.

Riz isn't afraid of his orientation because he's different by societal standards. It's not being queer that scares him no, it's the isolation of not knowing if anyone else feels the way he does. He knows that if he were gay or bi or pan his friends would understand, he'd be like them and be surrounded by people like him. But he's not like them, he is different in a way that seems entirely unique to himself.

So maybe he kind of wished he was gay, and that Baron existed because that was what he was afraid to admit. It'd be a lot less lonely than the truth.

[stiffyck]

Saw a post that made me furious yesterday so if people STILL don't understand this:

Aspec people are queer.

And no, it's not our love that makes us queer, it's our LACK of certain types of love that make us queer.

There is of course aspec people who are queer both because of their love and their lack of love, but being aspec is queer because of the lack of love.

Saying "but aspecs love too! Their love is also important! Aro and ace people have love and their love is also important!" is not the support you think it is for a lot of aspec people.

My love for my mother isn't what makes me queer. My love for my friends isn't what makes me queer. It's my lack or romantic love that makes me queer. Yea love is important to me, especially platonic love, but that is not what makes me queer.

And let's not forget about loveless aros.

For the love of god stop going "but aros love too!" just so you can relate to us somehow or just so you can include us. We don't need love to be included.

And because some people are going to take this as a personal attack: no, there is nothing wrong with being gay. There is nothing wrong with love is love. Love is important to a lot of people and I am not saying love is bad.

Happy pride everyone

[sexy-sapphic-sorcerer]

BBC Merlin being about 'magic' for 7 minutes gay

[incognitopolls]

*Referring to bi/pan/mspec lesbians and gays, transmasc lesbians, transfem gays, etc.

Keep it civil in the comments/reblogs. This blog aims to be an inclusive space for queer people of all kinds. This poll is a general survey, not a platform for discourse and not an invitation to air your personal grievances with how people identify.

–

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[gloaming-sometimes]

dear lesboy (and tbh any other nuanced identity) exclusionists who think your vein of thought is the majority in queer spaces id like to inform you that today at lunch with my (entirely queer) friend group the topic drifted to me being a butch lesbian and one friend goes "wait i thought you were a guy?" and i said "i am" and another friend interjected "dudes can be lesbians too" and that was that. no further probing about my identity, nohing about how im "invalidating transmen and lesbians", or whatever. everyone just accepted that thats how i identify and i dont owe an explanation for it and moved on. i promise u its not that deep 👍