#a yogi kitchen

[ayogikitchen]

How's Your Balance?

[yogadaily]

(via Yoga in Small Spaces: Finding Zen in Every Corner of Your Home   || Curated with love by yogadaily)

[cerealkiller740]

1961 Kellogg’s Corn Flakes with Huck Hound membership

[ra1ny-daze]

yogi boy + veggie mush enjoyer

[blondebehindthebucket]

The Sunshine Glass Smoothie

[vikrantteotiaseo2020]

Yogis Kitchen: Your Destination for the Best Homemade Indian Food Services in Langley!

Craving authentic Indian cuisine? Look no further! At Yogis Kitchen, we bring you the true flavors of India right to your doorstep in Langley. Indulge in our mouthwatering homemade dishes prepared with love and care, just like your grandma used to make.

Why choose Yogis Kitchen? We pride ourselves on using the freshest ingredients and traditional Indian recipes handed down through generations. Our talented chefs infuse each dish with a perfect blend of aromatic spices, creating a culinary experience that will transport you to the vibrant streets of India.

Whether you're a fan of rich curries, fragrant biryanis, or delectable vegetarian delights, we have something to satisfy every palate. From butter chicken and lamb tikka masala to vegetable korma and paneer tikka, our extensive menu offers a wide variety of options for everyone to enjoy.

[yogifixes]

Excellent Ways to Remodel a Kitchen with Handyman Services

A complete kitchen renovation plan lets you assess your needs, budget, and functionality. Establishing a budget reduces superfluous spending and helps you devote resources to the critical parts of your kitchen that require repairs. Recall that upgrading kitchen cabinets might be expensive in your pocket, requiring around one-third of the makeover price. Highlighting the scope lets you decide whether you can handle it or need handyman services. Although hiring a professional may be pricey, they may give recommendations and assistance to fine-tune your kitchen remodel design and mention some ideas you may have never considered.

[wynnyfryd]

💖 2024 Steddie Fic Recs 💖

@thefreakandthehair and i were talking about how so many of the fics we can name off the top of our heads are from right after the show came out because we were still actively making rec lists back then, so:

in no particular order i present to you an incomplete list of fics i love that were published or completed within the last two months

short fics (<10k)

Found God In A Tomato by @beetlesandstarss 5.7k | rated M | fluff, text fic

syrupy sweet strangers to first date fic. without spoiling anything, eddie is a flustered cutie and steve is a fuckin' menace who's lucky he's so hot

he tightened he grip by @steddieas-shegoes 1.3k | rated E | crack not treated remotely seriously

Mickala beloved your commitment to the bit makes me wanna commit myself to you 💍

Slide It In by gayhandshake 1.8k | rated E | multimedia crack

another truly impeccable work of crack fic, i laughed so hard at the first image that i made it the icon for my private discord server

what's that sound? (there's a funny man at my door) by @jewishrat420 4.8k | rated M | spicy six text fic

laughed out loud at this fic so many times i really don't know what else to tell you. as a matter of fact, i went to look at my bookmark note to see what else i had to say about it when i read it, and my note just says "fucking hilarious i laughed out loud like 6 times" 💀 did not do not will never know what else to tell you except that the phrase "the goyim of gender" just randomly pops into my brain once every four or so days now

medium fics (10-20k)

In the Kitchen or the Tulips by @teddywesworl 44k | rated E | telepathic soulmate AU

this fic said "watch me flip this trope inside out like a freshly cubed half of an avocado" and then DELIVERED. i finished this fic and then stared at the side of my husband's head for long enough that he looked over and went "wtf are you doing" lmao hush baby i am contemplating the implications

they're going to send us to prison for jerks by @greatunironic 16k | rated E | social media AU

okay firstly the premise of this fic is so specifically and delightfully unhinged; love that i'm not the only one who looks at a random tiktok account and manically whispers to myself "there's a fic in there somewhere." secondly the execution is a 10 outta 10 outta 10 outta TEN

long fics (50k+)

Sneaky Link by @morningberriesao3 152k | rated E | onlyfans au

the sex is HOT the boys are dumb as goddamn ROCKS what more do you need? oh, what's that? you do need more? sick because this fic also has: the tags "cum slut eddie munson" and "everyone is gay (because i say so)", chrissy the homophobe slayer being the cutest little spy, and jason getting his ass whooped, like, spiritually. on a spiritual level. physically unharmed but that boy's soul is missing teeth do u understand what i am saying

podfics!

it was love, love alone read by @reena-jenkins 21min | rated E

am i technically reccing my own fic on my own fic rec list? you bet your sweet ass i am, i don't even care how tacky that is reena's performance is hilarious and deserves to be listened to at least 40 more times while doing the dishes

relax (lay it back) read by @flintandfuss 1hr 10min | rated E | yogi dom steve x sub eddie

listen if i'm already being gauche then i gotta include my internet wife's belated birthday present to me, like i gotta. morally and lustfully obligated.

Schiava by @teddywesworl read by aheada_lettuce 1hr 30min | rated E | kas!eddie AU

said it once already today and i'll say it again, i cannot believe one of the best reading voices i've ever heard belongs to a person i mentally refer to as fucking lettuce LOL anyway this read is incredible and i have listened to it Times(tm)

and lastly, if you want more recs (like, 348 more specifically), you can browse my full list of public st bookmarks here

[inkchwe]

𝖊𝖓𝖍𝖞𝖕𝖊𝖓 𝖉𝖗𝖆𝖇𝖇𝖑𝖊𝖘 - 𝖛𝖎.

ʚɞ pairing: park sunghoon x fem!reader ʚɞ word count: 0.6k ʚɞ genre: (semi-suggestive?) fluff ʚɞ tags: established relationship, pet names, suggestive humor ʚɞ synopsis: Sometimes your boyfriend didn't mind interrupting your hobby time if it meant he could cop a feel.

“And as you exhale through your mouth, move into the position of downward facing dog,” the yogi says over the speaker. You follow her instructions, letting the air leave your lungs and adjusting to the new space in your diaphragm.

The podcast you started listening to to practice yoga has been very useful in relieving your stress from work and other life pursuits. Your body was still getting used to being bent into unique positions for the purpose of mental and physical well-being, but you had to start somewhere. It’s nice focusing on a physical hobby that not only relaxes you but builds your strength.

If only your boyfriend didn’t use it as an excuse to mess with you when he was home.

The opening of your apartment door breaks the tranquil background music in the podcast episode. You turn your head from your position to see Sunghoon walking in, a bag of groceries in one hand and his phone in the other.

“That’s why you weren’t answering,” he says. The smile he walked in with widens seeing you on the yoga mat splayed across the living room floor.

“You know Saturday afternoon is yoga time. I thought you would be at practice for another two hours.” You chose this time for a specific reason: Sunghoon wouldn't have time to make suggestive comments or gestures if he wasn't in the house to begin with.

“They let us leave, so I brought some takeout home for dinner.” He drops the bag on the kitchen counter and saunters over to you. His mouth twitches upwards at the edges, becoming a playful smirk. Here we go.

Sunghoon positions himself behind you with his hands on your hips, pressing himself against your ass. You sigh and know trying to shove him away would make it worse. “Hoon, not now,” you groan.

“I got off early for the first time in forever, baby. You should be happy to see me.” He guides his hands under your baggy top, feeling the warmth of your skin and humming in satisfaction.

When you feel the first thrust of his hips into yours, and the subsequent laugh that leaves his lips, you scramble from the yoga mat and stand up in a huff. “Is this just a big joke to you,” you grumble.

Sunghoon pretends not to know what you’re talking about, and that makes your face feel hotter than it did a second ago when his hands were on your waist. “Just because it’s ridiculous to you doesn’t mean it’s ridiculous to me.”

When your boyfriend sees the pout on your lips, he raises his hands in surrender. “Okay, I’m sorry, baby. Truly.” He walks closer to you and hopes not to receive a thwack to the arm. You don’t touch him, which is even worse in his eyes. “Listen, I didn’t mean to make you feel like I don’t take this—whatever this is—“

“Yoga,” you interrupt.

“Yoga, seriously.” Sunghoon puts his hands back on your hips and kisses both your cheeks and subsequently your lips. His apology is reflected in his mouth on yours, and instantly you forgive him, even if he still drives you crazy.

“Just letting you know though,” he says. “if you ever need to test your flexibility, you know you can always practice on me.”

[humansofnewyork]

(2/15) “Christmas, 1983. The year I learned it was all a dupe. I was twelve years old. And the holiday season began like any other. With my mother sitting me in front of the TV to watch the Thanksgiving Day parade. Every five minutes I’d run into the kitchen with updates: Mickey Mouse! Yogi Bear! But she just kept on cooking. ‘Tell me when he comes,’ she’d say. Then after what seemed like eternity, after the Pink Panther, after the Giant Turkey, after the mayor, the marching bands, the baton twirlers, after everything that wasn’t Christmas. Poof! There he’d be. Waving down from his plastic sleigh. I’d yell into the kitchen: ‘Here he comes! Here he comes!’ And my mother would come running in, wearing her schmock, her ‘schmata,’ a wooden spoon in one hand. And her eyes would fill with tears. Santa! The real Santa. This wasn’t the Bloomingdale’s Santa. This wasn’t the Santa from King’s Plaza Mall. Those were Santa’s helpers. Santa needs helpers, he can’t be everywhere at once. Because after the parade he goes to the eighth floor of the 34th Street Macy’s. Where for five glorious weeks he collects the wishes of children. After Thanksgiving dinner we’d gather around the calendar and choose a night to go. Every single year; since I was a newborn. When the night arrived we’d pile onto the N-Train, the Brooklyn Polar Express. Drops you right across the street from Macy’s. Then it’s onto the escalators: up, up, up, until the stairs turn wooden. Santa looked a little different back then. They weren’t exactly going for authenticity. But that made no difference to my mother. She’d speak to this man like he was real: ‘Oh Santa, you look so nice. Oh Santa, we come every year.’ My two younger brothers went next. Steve asked for a baseball glove. Anthony asked for his first ever bicycle, with a basket on the front. Then it was my turn. That year I knew exactly what I wanted. I’d been seeing the commercials on TV for weeks. A full set of Tannen’s magic tricks: color-changing rabbits, disappearing coke bottles. These weren’t close-up kiddie tricks. These were real parlor tricks. Stuff that you could do on a stage. This was the year I’d finally become a real magician.”

[psychoanalysisandchill]

The wrathful glare of Kali and the callous gaze of Medusa – the emergence of the femme fatale in the female psyche.

Legend of Kali

In Hindu legend, goddess Durka and her helpers, the Matri goddesses, slay the demon Raktabīja, only to find out that the stains of Raktabīja’s blood act like seed on soil as every drop manifests another duplicate of him. Durka becomes enraged and summons Kali, whom then proceeds to slay and devour Raktabīja and his legion of duplicates. She dances on their corpses and parades around with Raktabīja slain head in her hand, securing the droplets of blood through holding a plate underneath it, so as to prevent further bleeding on the soil. Motivated by her insatiable fury, Kali proceeds with the destruction of all else that crosses her path, but after stepping on the corpse of Lord Shiva, Kali is struck by embarrassment and remorse as her supressed superego is released from her shadow and brings her back to her senses. Lord Shiva’s has the power to liberate Kali from her fury as he is the transcendent Self. He is the benevolent patriarch, yogi supreme, yet also husband and father, suggesting the achievement of harmonious balance between wordily duties and that of holy men. His anima, being integrated, is neither possessing him nor is it plaguing him as a result of repression. He neither falls prey to the manipulative trickery of deceitful women nor does he view women as disdainfully inferior sexual objects.  Only he can liberate Kali from her all-consuming misandry and soothe her sorrows.

Shiva’s non-threatening benevolence makes itself known through the act of laying underneath Kali’s feet. Possessed by wrath, Kali has lost sight of that which is holy. Without recognition of the benevolent aspects of Shiva, Kali’s fury is bound to drown the universe in her flames, however, Durka’s initial intention behind the summoning of Kali was to defeat Raktabīja and his legion of duplicates, rather than bring about the destruction of the universe.

Durka and the Matri goddesses are at loss at Raktabīja’s lack of chivalry in combat and the injustice of his supernatural power. They are the modern-day women whom get harassed by demonic and demeaning men despite enforcing their boundaries. Such men seek to dominate through ridicule rather than reason. The lack of decorum in both combat and dialogue makes the summoning of Kali inevitable for a woman as all else has failed to shield her vulnerability from the malevolence of a demonic beast.

In recent memory, Raktabīja and Poseidon manifested themselves as Harvey Weistein and Jeffrey Epstein, powerful demonic beasts, seeking to preserve their authority whilst uninterested in the discontinuation of their predatory behaviour. The faith in the punitive power of the rule of law arrests Kali from flooding the consciousness of their victims, making Durka and the Matri goddesses persevere in a civilized manner, unlike the instance in which 200 Indian women, armed with vegetable knifes, stones and chilli powder stormed the court hearing of gang-leader and rapist Akku Yadav, dismembering his genitals with a vegetable knife, robbing him of his phallus through a vengeful barbaric act of literal castration, dead in a matter of 15 minutes, leaving his lifeless corpse daggered by kitchen knives on the white marble floor of the court, in an exhibition of gore galore, resembling the sublime beauty of a transcendent piece of art in the eyes of Kali.

Legend of Medusa (Ovid´s version)

In Greek legend, Medusa is the sole mortal among three gorgon sisters, depicted as a beautiful maid with plentiful of potential suitors, longing for the reciprocation of her attention. She is brutally raped in the temple of Athena by God Poseidon as a result of the rejection of his advances. Enraged by the desacralization of her temple, Athena curses Medusa, turning her hair turned into snakes, metamorphosing her into a monstrous form armed with a glare that petrified anyone who dared to meet her eyes.

As if Medusa hadn’t suffered enough, she was later beheaded by demigod Perseus. Many men had tried to behead her prior to Perseus, but all had been turned into stone at the sight of her petrifying glare. Perseus however, was clever enough to stare into the mirror moments before the beheading, instead of in her eyes. As he flew over Libya with Medusa’s decapitated in his hands, blood dripped on the soil and snakes sprout from the droplets. Medusa’s head is later gifted to Athena, whom attaches it to her shield, supplying her with the power of Medusa’s deadly glare in combat.

The legend of Medusa is one of horrific injustice and betrayal. After the violation of her person through the act of rape, her boss, Athena, does the unimaginable: curse her. The ancient equivalent to the modern-day slut shame of a genuine victim of rape. The horrors of rape alone didn’t metamorphize her hair into serpents, it was that the aftermath of her rape was followed by the ultimate betrayal by a deity she had bestowed with trust.

If Kali’s fury has lit her heart on fire, then Athena’s betrayal has frozen Medusa’s heart into ice. In Kali, the Nietzschean will to power is alive and striving, but in Medusa it is nowhere to be found. Medusa, as a beautiful maiden was pure, pure in the sense that she couldn’t conceive of the unfathomable betrayal of Athena, thus when it dawned upon her   hope in both humanity and divinity was lost. Anyone who’s superego isn’t as disturbed as that of Athena and Poseidon will be overwhelmed by their conscience upon meeting Medusa’s gaze. The burden of her victimization is a collective bearing for all to carry, reminding us of the consequences of vicious cruelty.

Every young boy has looked into the eyes of Medusa as their, otherwise loving, mother coolly hit them with the “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed,” remark. Such disappointment, from women, causes a man to cringe in an instinctive act of clenching the gut muscles.

In yogic philosophy, masculine consciousness is associated with fire and believed to reside in the solar plexus. One believes to be speaking figuratively when alluding to bravery as “having guts” but embodied bravery, is quite literally impossible without having a strong presence in the gut area.

The act of cringing is the act of shame as a biological reaction rather than an emotion. Medusa’s ice-cold gaze, cursing one to cringe in shame, is the true extinguisher of a man’s masculine consciousness, making him think twice before he acts next time, however since Medusa has lost hope in the redeeming qualities of man, there will be no next time, whomever meeting her gaze is doomed to freeze for all eternity. The many men whom attempted to behead her prior to Perseus couldn’t bear the collective burden of a restless conscience and thus instinctively attempt to rescue their phallus from the prospect of psychic castration through beheading the source of their restlessness. Such an act of profanity, is nothing short from foolish desperation, a last resort for restoring balance in one’s psyche, bound to fail from the get go, which is why all men prior to Perseus freeze to stone upon their attempted murder.

Perseus only finds success through looking in the mirror at the moment of execution, sparing his phallus from castration as his conscience remains unaffected, but his heinous crime is not without consequence as Medusa’s spilled blood sprout to life venomous serpents on Libyan soil. Medusa is Mahsa Amini, as the Iranian morality police seem to mistake the beauty of a woman’s hair for poisonous serpents. The serpents sprung to life by Medusa’s blood are the many Iranian women unleashing the terror of their liberated hair upon the morality police. Nothing terrifies fundamentalist Islamists more than the emergence of their own anima, as it becomes projected upon an enchanting woman. 

Raktabīja’s blood stains produce duplicates as a reaction to fair female resistance, Medusa’s blood stains produce serpents as a reaction to horrific injustice and a cowardice murder. The moral of the story is that injustice and disrespect of self-assertion lay the groundworks in which mayhem may flourish.

Lastly, Athena attaching Medusa’s head to her shield is a ploy to harness the power of a victim’s hopeless disappointment and masquerade it as her own. Athena, despite being a deity, could impossibly freeze her opponents with her own gaze, as she created Medusa’s through initiating the destruction of her reputation. It is solely through a masquerade in which Athena cosplays victimhood that she can harness the powers of it.

[ayogikitchen]

I Will Do Less

This is your daily reminder to slow down and rest. Stop doing so much. This session, A Yogi Kitchen is focusing on the word Thrive. You can join us in class as we focus on the word during on check-in at the beginning of class and savasana at the end of class. You can breathe into the word repeating it gently to yourself during your own meditations. You can work this week to align your actions…

[yogadaily]

(via Pin by Jakia on dance<3 [Video] | Yoga poses advanced, Yoga lifestyle, Yoga motivation  || Curated with love by yogadaily) 

[ramdom-stupid-sketches-of-mine]

My coral island farmer OC, Fazlyn Dirynhai Base on the convo, interaction and behavior , these are her character I came up with all info i have at the time. So Imma gonna put it here for the record for future reference?? since the game have presented main personality through text, context and subtext a lot. I need to keep track of her somehow. [contain SPOILERS about questline/heart scene, convo, interaction] Here I go.

She likes starfruit. (; Luke Convo)

She can eat raw vegetables like eggplants. (; Luke and Raj Convo)

She likes making joke and puns. (; Interact with people's room and shop)

She can be 'respectful', rarely. (; Interact with Mollie's closet)

She talks a lot, even with someone she barely know. (; Leah and Mark convo)

She's yogi (; Ben convo)

She likes romantic homey dinner kind of date. (; Answer Pablo Question)

She likes eating flower than admiring one. (; Answer Scott Question)

She can be unintentionally flirt sometimes, but it just being nice in that case. (; Answer Mark Question)

She usually collapsed at night from exhaustion (; Behavior)

She worked in art field before. (; Answer Zarah Question)

She likes gossip, sometimes, of course *wink* (; Bree convo)

She can drink alcohol in little amount (; Scott's heart scene)

She likes horror movie(; Rafael's heart scene)

Other info about her.

She remembered Alice and Lily when she arrived. (; Alice and Lily favorite shown since we arrived to the town, before the farmer spoke to both of them.)

She didn't remember Nina, but they were childhood friends. (; Nina's questline)

Her name isn't her given name. (; Raj Convo). // I came up with the story that her legal name come from her nickname and her old first name, it started from she had the same name with her classmate. So, she's the one with the nickname for convenience. Then after that she kept found the incident recurring a lot, so she changed her nickname to her legal name for good. Her old first name is Lyn.

Speaker in Luke's shop is easily broken, she used to buy that speaker's brand before and it's broken in 6 months. (; Interact with top right shelf in Luke's shop.)

She also owned a clock like the one Luke sells back in Pokyo. (; Interact with bottom left shelf in Luke's shop.)

She tasted Betty's soup without permission. (; Interact with the pot in Betty's kitchen.) [imo, i want to smack her hand for that.]

Her vow in her wedding with Luke was 'Luke, a lifetime is not long enough for me to wake up every morning next to you.' (; Married day, obviously.)

Anddddd, these are my headcanons for this character. Just base on my random guess and thoughts.

She was closer to Alice than Suki when they were kids.

At some point, I think Nina, Luke, and farmer had played together, but it just 1-2 times, so only Nina can remember that. Since Luke is too young to remember the farmer and haven't been contacted with, and the farmer played with Nina more than Luke and she still didn't remember her, she doesn't good with remembering and such.

Suki, Alice, Nina, Lily and the farmer was a childhood friend group.

She hadn't talked with Tavern siblings or blacksmith brother before, from the first convo they had.

Her hair and her blue eyes come from her mother side, her mother is from San franciskyo

Her grandparents who owned the farm are on her father side, so they should be Indonesian(?).

Her parents met in Pokyo and she grew up there. That's the reason she had Pokyo accent from Leah's convo.

Her first talk with Taco, the dialog is like, '[He smells a lot like Luke]', but she hadn't speak with Luke at that point. So, she kinda buffled a bit. 'Wait, who's Luke??'

Her first rescuer for collapsed after 2 AM is Luke, I remember this because it's happened in 2nd Spring in the Year 1. So, in Year 2, the farmer gave him the locket that day, 2nd Spring.

2nd Spring in Year 3, she changed her hair as celebration of sort?? idk, it's pretty coincidence. I just wanted to change something a bit about the hair and just noticed that it that day. huh.. Wonder what will happend if I continue playing until next year.

[fierce-sims]

I need to go to bed aka introducing my starter families

I just want to preface this by saying that this took way too much time to put together, and I'm not even done yet, lol.

The Escarlata Family:

Davyd Escarlata | Scorpio | Vampire | Bisexual | Fortune/Knowledge | LTW Earn Lots of Money

7/10 Neat

5/10 Outgoing

6/10 Active

5/10 Playful

3/10 Nice

When push comes to shove, Davyd is a man who will get the job done. With his new fangs and blood lust, he must balance his thirst with the demands of his rap career.

Riley Escarlata | Taurus | Human | Straight | Pleasure/Popularity | LTW Became Celebrity Chef

5/10 Neat

7/10 Outgoing

2/10 Active

7/10 Playful

5/10 Nice

Riley has her eyes set on the kitchen, but she lacks organization and the discipline to succeed in the culinary business.

Christopher Escarlata | Capricorn | Human | Straight | Family/Knowledge | LTW Spent 200 Hours Teaching Others

7/10 Neat

5/10 Outgoing

2/10 Active

6/10 Playful

5/10 Nice

Christopher is a wise and well-travelled retiree who used to be a real family man until his wife refused to retire and his son became a vampire. But now, his biggest problem lies with his unmotivated daughter.

Yolanda Escarlata | Scorpio | Human | Straight | Fortune | LTW Self-Employed Talent

6/10 Neat

5/10 Outgoing

6/10 Active

3/10 Playful

5/10 Nice

Despite her advanced age, Yolanda has a sharp mind and a love for writing. She has no plans of retiring, and continues to pursue her true passion of culinary journalism.

The Chi Family

Yogi Chi | Scorpio | Human | Aro-Ace | Knowledge | LTW Became Cult Leader

8/10 Neat

7/10 Outgoing

10/10 Active

3/10 Playful

7/10 Nice

Yogi's young, handsome, and has a smile that draws people in. A friendly yoga instructor by day, nobody knows that once they're in his clutches, he will use his persuasive powers to convince them to do his bidding.

The Roomie Family

Greta Green | Cancer | Human | Bisexual | Knowledge/Family | LTW Became Ecological Guru

7/10 Neat

1/10 Outgoing

5/10 Active

5/10 Playful

7/10 Nice

Greta is a shy but passionate botanist who is determined to make a difference in her own quirky way. When she's not poring over environmental data, she enjoys spending time with her fashionable roommate, Janey. However, Greta can't help but wonder if her feelings for her gal pal go beyond just friendship.

Janey Styles | Taurus | Human | Gay | Popularity | LTW Self-Employed Talent

5/10 Neat

5/10 Outgoing

3/10 Active

6/10 Playful

6/10 Nice

Janey values style, fashion, sophistication, and has a passion for all things high-end and exclusive. Although she can be a bit bossy, her heart is in the right place.

The Silver Lining Family

On the left: Luna Wilde | Libra | Human | Gay | Popularity/Pleasure | LTW Become Rock God

2/10 Neat

8/10 Outgoing

6/10 Active

7/10 Playful

6/10 Nice

Fun loving and spontaneous, Luna is just one of those people who exudes energy and positivity no matter what.

On the right: Ella Elite | Aquarius | Human | Bi | Knowledge/Popularity | LTW Gain 5 Gold Badges

2/10 Neat

5/10 Outgoing

7/10 Active

6/10 Playful

5/10 Nice

Ella is trendy and always on the lookout for the next big thing. When she's not performing, she can usually be found protesting.

On the left: Aiden Spade | Virgo | Human | Straight | Knowledge/Fortune | Became Game Designer

6/10 Neat

4/10 Outgoing

6/10 Active

4/10 Playful

5/10 Nice

Aiden is as comfortable with a comic book as he is a guitar, and enjoys delving into the unknown. He's a self-proclaimed ghost hunter and is always up for a game of trivia.

On the right: Reid Stifled | Aquarius | Human | Gay | Family | LTW Graduate Children From College

5/10 Neat

1/10 Outgoing

6/10 Active

8/10 Playful

5/10 Nice

Reid is part of a band, but struggles to connect with his more social bandmates, who always seem to hog the spotlight. While he may be the unassuming one in the group, Reid has a playful personality that is a stark contrast to his shy demeanor.

And that's all for now! My god, that was too much. I hope to add more supernatural sims as well as some proper traditional families in the future to tie everything together. I'm sorry for any mistakes or missing context, I am exhausted, and some of this information I haven't gotten around to yet.

[run-aled]

RED VALLEY: SEASON 1 EPISODE 2"The Golden Bullet"

[transcript]

SCENE 1

THE ABRUPT SWITCH OF A TAPE PLAYER RUNNING. A CRACKLING, ANCIENT RECORDING BEGINS TO PLAY

FEMALE VOICE: Aubrey Wood, log number 58. The infusions have begun in earnest now. Yogi and Pooh aren't feeling too chipper. Yogi's only been out of the medibay for 48 hours as it is, I'm confident he'll be back in again by tonight. Pooh's problems are as much down to his attitude as anything else. He ripped out his IV this morning and wouldn't eat. You'd be forgiven for thinking he doesn't want to be here. All the others seem fine, responding well. Not enough time's passed to observe any particular cause for these two reactions compared to the others. And honestly not a big enough pool to draw any worthwhile conclusions anyway. Maybe it's because we didn't give the other guys such stupid names.

TAPE PLAYER CLICKS OFF.

THE KITCHEN, WARREN'S HOME. CLOSE SOUNDS OF WASHING UP.

KAREN: (OFF) What names did the other guys get?

WARREN: (CLOSE) Brown, Black, Grizzly and Polar.

KAREN: She's right, they are less stupid.

WARREN: Indeed.

KAREN: How much more is there?

WARREN: Haven't listened to it all but not a lot. Tape's mostly blank. Maybe they were for dictation, someone transcribes the log then wipes the tape. Maybe they used a different tape for each log, no matter how short. Maybe she lost it.

KAREN: Maybe it was taken.

WARREN: Or maybe it was taken.

KAREN: This is exciting! So what is it, some animal testing thing? That might explain why its a big secret. Can't pour shampoo in a rabbit's eyes these days.

WARREN: You sound sad about that.

KAREN: You know how brittle my hair is. I need good shampoo.

WARREN LAUGHS.

KAREN: Have you spoken to Doug about this? Do you think he'd be okay with you following some eco-warrior who's sending what I assume is confidential material to your home address?

WARREN: I haven't mentioned it yet.

KAREN: Because this guy Gordon told you not to?

WARREN: No, because it's...twenty past 7 in the morning and I'm scrubbing fish skin off a frying pan. I'll speak to him about it later. Gordon's just an old fruit. The whole company is crawling with this kind of guy, little mole men who never see daylight and want to be in the X-Files.

KAREN: Do you want to be in the X-Files?

WARREN: Are you kidding, I'm married to a fucking X-File

KAREN: Ahhhhh!

WARREN: Ahhhhhhhhhh -

CUT.

SCENE 2

TAPE PLAYER BEGINS.

AUBREY WOOD: Dr Thomas wants to keep going with the dietary supplements. I'm less inclined to continue just because they taste so bad, none of them are enjoying it and like I said, Pooh is just refusing now, even when I gave him something he liked instead he wouldn't touch it. Dr Thomas thinks it'll help the infusion process along and I don't know, maybe it would. It shouldn't be necessary though, and if we don't stick to the regimen we laid out then how are we going to prove the infusion's efficacy. I suppose we're both coming from a place of compassion. I want to bring their spirits up, send them in with as positive a state of mind as we can. Ben wants to give them the best physiological shot possible. Bryony will decide.

TAPE PLAYER CUTS.

CANTEEN, DAYTIME. THE BUSY SOUNDS OF LUNCH HOUR.

CASHIER: That's £4.20 please.

WARREN: £4.20? How is that, it's usually, like 3 quid something.

CASHIER: Vegetables are 50p per serving so that a pound...chips are £1 a serving so that's £3…

WARREN: How is that £3?

CASHIER: That's 2 servings of chips.

WARREN: That's 1 serving of chips.

CASHIER: And the pie is £1.20.

WARREN: But that's only 1 serving of chips.

CASHIER: It's 2 sir.

WARREN: How many chips quantifies a serving? Is there a specific number?

CASHIER: I'll take £4.

WARREN: So the price is negotiable now? Is the chip count negotiable too?

CASHIER: Sir…

CUT.

OFFICE, DAYTIME. WARREN APPROACHES A DESK IN A BUSY OFFICE.

WARREN: Hello.

JEMMA: Hi.

WARREN: I'm sorry...this is my desk.

JEMMA: Oh Warren! Hi, I'm Jemma.

WARREN: Hi, hi. Um. So is something wrong with your desk, or...

JEMMA: No, the hotdesking starts today.

WARREN: What hotdesking?

JEMMA: It was in the email from Doug.

WARREN: I haven't seen that email.

JEMMA: Oh. That's awkward! I've taken your desk!

WARREN: Yeah. I...don't know where to sit now. They're all taken, aren't they?

AWKWARD PAUSE

JEMMA: Hmm. I assumed you're meant to be on the road today, that's why there's nothing free.

WARREN: Okay, cool, cool. I guess its fine, if its just today.

JEMMA: Oh no, its every Thursday.

WARREN: What?

JEMMA: It's...every Thursday now. Because of Neil and Doug...

WARREN HAS TAKEN HIS PHONE FROM HIS POCKET, RINGING OUDLY.

WARREN: Sorry.

JEMMA: You should check the email.

WARREN: I will, I will. Hello?

GORDON:: (D) Did you listen to it?

WARREN: Hello?

GORDON: (D) Did you listen to the tape?

WARREN: Mr Porlock?

GORDON: (D) No, I'm the other guy you met yesterday who put his balls on the line sending recordings of highly sensitive material to your house.

WARREN: Of course, of course.

GORDON: (D) Is this a bad time, you seem to have a big boyvoice on.

WARREN IS MOVING QUICKLY THROUGH THE OFFICE AND THROUGH A DOOR TO A QUIET, ECHOEY STAIRWELL.

WARREN: No, now is fine.

GORDON: (D) Did you listen to it?

WARREN: I've listened to it.

GORDON: (D) And?

WARREN: It's really interesting, yes.

GORDON: (D) Interesting?

WARREN: Yes.

PAUSE. GORDON SIGHS.

GORDON: (D) Look, I'm going to be in the car park of the north build at 7pm tonight. I've got a gold colour Vauxhall Astra. Well it's more coppery but I like to say its gold. I call it the Golden Bullet. It doesn't go very fast.

WARREN: Thank you for telling me that but I-

GORDON: (D) Meet me in the car, but I recommend you get to the end of the tape first as you obviously haven't. Then we can discuss how 'interesting' it is.

WARREN: I actually have a lot of other things I-

GORDON HANGS UP.

WARREN: Motherfu-

CUT.

SCENE 3

WARREN, IN HIS CAR.

WARREN: So yeah, it's good, this guy seems to have some background on the whole thing, so...yeah.

DOUG: (D) Seems to?

WARREN: Yeah. He says he used to work for the Seed Vault in some capacity. I think he may have been let go to be honest, he seems a bit bitter about the whole thing.

DOUG: (D) Well it would be useful to find someone who was involved with the project at a managerial level. These guys, they rename, repurpose, restaff these things all the time. If it wins them their slice of the budget they will do whatever they have to to stay in business.

WARREN: Yeah, of course. I will, this guy is just interesting and I thought it would be good to get to know as much about...you know, whatever this is, before I went in all guns blazing.

DOUG: (D) All guns blazing.

WARREN: Yeah.

DOUG: (D) Did you speak to Clive Schill yet?

WARREN: Uh, no. Nope, I tried him, haven't had a response yet.

DOUG: (D) I heard he's the man of the hour in R&D. I'm sure he'd be able to help.

WARREN: I'm sure he can, yep, just want to work this guy Gordon, I like to be thorough. Don't worry.

DOUG: (D) I'm not worried, buddy. You just keep me posted, alright? And ask for help when you need it, okay? That's what I'm here for.

WARREN: You got it. Oh, and Doug?

DOUG: (D) Yeah?

WARREN: Have I lost my desk on Thursdays?

DOUG: (D) Yeah, Jemma needs it while Neil is restructuring. You saw that in the email?

WARREN: Of course, of course. I think I just got the date wrong, or something.

DOUG: (D) Right.

WARREN: Not to worry. I'll be on the road.

DOUG: (D) Okay then.

WARREN: Right, I'll let you go. And Doug, thank you. Again.

DOUG: (D) Don't be soft.

WARREN: Sure thing.

DOUG: (D) Find the money!

THEY BOTH LAUGH.

CUT.

THE TAPE PLAYER BEGINS AGAIN.

AUBREY WOOD: It's 3.43am. Yogi is dead. He was back in the medibay for a few hours and we'd ceased the infusion six, no, seven hours ago. But he arrested just after midnight. Bryony and Ben were already there, I arrived as soon as I heard the alarm. We did everything right, everything we could, but we couldn't get him back. I'm going to sleep.

CLICK AS THE TAPE STOPS, THEN IMMEDIATELY RESUMES.

AUBREY WOOD: Dr Thomas, Dr Halbech and I all concur that Yogi died of a massive hypercoagulation event. If he had had a single embolism maybe he would've survived the arrest and we could have...there was no way we could've stopped it happening. Yogi had no genetic disposition that would invite this kind of scenario, or he never would've made it on to the program. So it must've been a reaction to the cryoprotectant. Yogi was on the alpha course with Pooh and Brown so we've paused their infusions while Bryony recalibrates. This still isn't going to bump the schedule apparently. Teddy Bears Picnic goes live on Monday and I have never felt stupider using that codename than I do this morning.

CUT.

SCENE 4

WARREN IS ON THE PHONE

VOICE: If I could just take the account number, I can help you with that sir.

WARREN: I gave you that just now.

VOICE: I...don't think you did.

WARREN: Not you, the robot person asked me to type it in before I got put through to you.

VOICE: That's your policy number, not your account number.

WARREN: How is that different

VOICE: Your policy number is for your individual policy, the account refers to your department, Accounts.

WARREN: You want a number for the account for Accounts.

VOICE: Yes.

WARREN: Look, I don't have that number, I just have the letter you sent which tells me you're lowering my pension contribution when I requested that I increase it.

VOICE: Yes, with the account number I can access all your policy information and see where we are with-

WARREN: If you need the account number to see my policy information then what is the point of a policy number?

VOICE: Sir...

CUT.

THE CANTEEN.

WARREN: Just the curry and the yoghurt thanks.

CASHIER: Could you lift the poppadom please?

WARREN: Sorry?

CASHIER: Can I see under the poppadom.

WARREN: What do you think is under the poppadom?

CASHIER: I'd like to check please.

WARREN: It's curry. There's curry under the poppadom.

CASHIER: Will you lift it?

WARREN: No. I'm going to draw the line here. I'm not going to lift the poppadom.

CASHIER: Sir, there's a line. I can't charge until I've seen your items and I need to confirm what is underneath the poppadom.

WARREN: There are 5 chips under the poppadom.

CASHIER: I'm sorry, I couldn't hear that?

WARREN: There are 5 chips under the poppadom.

THERE IS SOME QUIET GIGGLING AND A GASP.

CASHIER: Well that's another pound isn't it.

WARREN: It sure is

WARREN LUMPS CHANGE ON TO THE COUNTER.

CASHIER: Thank you.

WARREN: Thank you.

CASHIER: Have a great day.

WARREN: You have a great day.

CASHIER: I will try.

WARREN: Swell. Namaste.

CUT.

DIFFERENT PHONE CALL.

CLIVE: No no no, if you want to talk about anything like crop storage, anything in the Agric sector, you need to go back to before Overhead acquired all those patents. You need to go back to Wheelhouse.

WARREN: Wheelhouse?

CLIVE: Wheelhouse. That was the company that owned all the farming contracts. They had satellite operations around the country, around the world. When we absorbed Wheelhouse we took all those over.

WARREN: Right.

CLIVE: Overhead doesn't just buy patents, man. We buy every other company that buys patents. We own ideas, thats the point.

WARREN: Yeah, I get it.

CLIVE: Yeah, you do! Doug told me you were the next big thing.

WARREN: I don't know about that. Clive...Do you know anything about cryo...cryonic storage?

CLIVE: Hmm. You mean cryogenics?

WARREN: No that's actually the study of...I can't remember, actually. Anything cryo-ey really.

CLIVE: We own a bunch of patents for, like, athletic treatments, like cryosaunas for rich footballers, Olympians, shit like that, I don't know. What's that got to do with your seed vault thing?

WARREN: Well if it was a vault for storing crops they'd have to be frozen, wouldn't they.

CLIVE: Oh right. Yeah, that makes sense.

WARREN: So you don't?CLIVE: Don't what?

WARREN: Know anyone, any teams that work in cryo stuff.

MUFFLED SOUNDS ON THE LINE.

WARREN: Clive?

CLIVE: Yeah?

WARREN: Everything alright?

CLIVE: Yeah man. Look I've got to bounce, good talking with you. Doug was right, you're the next big thing! Let's get a drink or something soon.

WARREN: Oh right, yeah, let's-

CLIVE: I'll email you. Peace.

HANGS UP.

CUT.

SCENE 5

GORDON'S CAR.RAINFALL OUTSIDE. DOOR OPENS, THE RAIN LOUDER, SPLASHING IN PUDDLES NEARBY. WARREN GETS IN, SHUTS THE DOOR.

GORDON: Are you recording?

WARREN: Jesus, I just got in. Aren't you recording anyway?

WARREN RUMMAGES IN A BAG.

GORDON: Of course I am. But you need a copy for your own records.

WARREN: Can't I just have a copy of yours?

GORDON: Now you're being ridiculous.

WARREN PLACES HIS TAPE PLAYER ON THE DASH AND CLICKS IT ON.

WARREN: There. Done. Continue.

GORDON: How did you enjoy the tape?

WARREN: Some horrible things happening to some things with code names that are all bears for some reason.

GORDON: Some things.

WARREN: So you're saying they're people, Yogi and Pooh and Brown Bear and whatever.

GORDON: Well if they were bears, they wouldn't be very good code names.

WARREN: I suppose not.

GORDON: Kind of weird though isn't it. Wood talking about compassion, about doing what's right. But she doesn't treat them like people. They might as well be animals. Pumping them up with their synthetic shit and sending them to their doom.

WARREN: What are the infusions, what's she giving them?

GORDON: I don't know exactly. But we're past the nutritional boosting phase, the training, the fitness, the aptitude tests, the gene studies. We're getting to the real ham of this sandwich, Warren. These are cryoprotectant infusions.

WARREN: But what is that?

GORDON: Getting your subjects in the best shape of their lives is only the first part. You want someone to survive the greatest endurance test humankind has ever known, you're going to want to make sure they're ripped like Jesus before they go through it. But none of that matters if you freeze them so fucking hard ice crystals form all over their body and they end up shredded in the more traditional sense of the word. Then you'll basically just be defrosting a big red slush puppy. So you gradually swap out their regular blood for a synthetic, that doesn't just do all your regular blood jobs but is also crammed with lots of goodies derived from all kinds of crazy shit.

WARREN: Crazy shit infusions.

GORDON: Look, I wasn't there and I'm not a cryo...ologist. But the company's been trying to develop and refine life-extending drugs for years. If you want to follow the money, there is an R&D black fucking hole in this company when it comes to human longevity projects. They're taking DNA from amphibians, those little frogs who get frozen in lakes all winter and survive to seethe spring, cold-climate insects, there's the, uh, rotten egg gas, uh-

WARREN: What?

GORDON: Hydrogen sulphide, they used that as a fucking chemical weapon in WW1, terrifically dangerous, but apparently its loaded with all this crap that protects your arteries and whatever. The stuff in red wine thats meant to be good for you, fucking olive oil, who knows. Anyway they fill their boys, Yogi and BooBoo and whoever, with bags of this stuff, teddy bears fucking picnic indeed, so they're as ready as they'll ever be when they go in the freezer. That's why they're all named after bears, man. They're going into hibernation.

PAUSE. WARREN LISTENS TO THE RAIN.

WARREN: So I have a lot of questions.

GORDON: Are they all about accounting?

WARREN: Not exclusively-

GORDON: Come on, man! I am talking to you about illegal experimentation into human cryonic preservation! If Icould show you the receipts I would but this is what I have.

WARREN: You have to concede that what this is, is two men sat in the rain in a 1998 Vauxhall Astra.

GORDON: I get it, you need more. I'm doing this as gradually as I can because if I showed you the whole jigsaw you head would pop off your skinny fucking shoulders. Here is your next puzzle piece.

GLOVE BOX OPENS AND CLOSES.

WARREN: Another tape.

GORDON: Another tape.

WARREN: This, uh, this won't fit in my dictaphone.

GORDON: No it won't Mr. Godby, but luckily you're sitting in a 1998 Vauxhall Astra. What it lacks in air conditioning it makes up for in a top notch cassette player.

GORDON PUTS THE TAPE IN THE PLAYER. IT BURSTS TO LIFE.

END