#a truly scary experience
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I wanted to test some ai of characters and so I decided to do it with Frank since its the one I like the most, even tho we don't know a lot about him, I can surely tell that if I tell him "thank you" HE WOULD NOT TRY TO DOMINATE THE WORLD, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT AI
#sussy surfers#a truly scary experience#'i will kill you now ' *proceeds to tell me about how hes the god of this relam and that im a horrible person
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Sorry for the spam (^o^;) I just really like your blog
no need to apologize ayy!
in this corner we welcome all forms of enjoyment, regardless of whether you're a
happy to have yall here w me,
headin into homestuck 2024 :^)
#was debating if sollux truly was lurker type but then i rmbr'd him quietly reading all of karkat's memos for a good laugh HAHAHAHAAH#ask#aleemie#homestuck#karkat vantas#sollux captor#solkat#2024#vioart#but o. regarding the etiquette learned frm other socmed#spamming here is safe+good! it does not harm the op by shadowbanning like instagram#and its not 💀 like twitter where ur likes/following are permanently set to public#ur tumblr experience is within ur control it can be as free/empty/curated as u want!!#((tho ofc i do encourage rbing for ppl who've been hoping to start that habit!!#s'cool to slowly work ur way up from the extra special posts that hv lingered longest in ur heart and quietly build ur cache trove :-)#for example back when i was struggling to rt on a new twt acc i just started setting nonsense criteria for myself LOL#like “breaking this void is scary holy fuck ok i shall start by rting posts w brownish/reddish clrs bcs its inspo vibes for my art”#and gradually after a while of deliberate sharing i gained more confidence to share a larger variety of posts that make me feel things!!!!#no more training wheels i may be scared but i love loving more!!!!#same goes for engaging w fics too it takes energy to think of how to comment and thats ok‚ do ur best to explore what works for u!!!!#take screenshots of ur fave paragraphs & start annotating in gallery/notes app if that helps!!!!#also tumblr's customizable queue means u can stack posts and bolt hgehehe. my preferred form of existing on the net))
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[ cw: violence mention / death mention / ]
Will never stop thinking about how Leo, all alone in an endless void and being beaten again and again and again by the only other living thing around, still finds comfort in that space. The situation he was in was completely hopeless, and in any other circumstances he would not have escaped, at least not fast enough to save him from permanent (or even fatal) damage, be it physical or mental.
And yet, despite the bleakness of his situation, despite the agony and helplessness, all he needs is one glance at a crumbled photograph, one glance to remember his family, and that’s enough of a reason for him to smile.
Maybe that’s why his powers center around manipulating space - because no matter how much space is between them, no matter how dire his own situation may be, just the thought of his family, alive and okay, is enough to give Leo hope.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#the prison dimension is horrifying on its own#add in a monstrous being that towers over you and has vowed to ensure your suffering?#god I can’t imagine how scary that is#Mikey opening the portal was a miracle because if he hadn’t managed it there#it’s really up in the air what could have become of Leo#personally I subscribe by the theory that you straight up can’t die in the prison dimension#so it’s a prison in all ways#but the thought of a Leo who manages anyway who adapts and continues to have hope despite it all…#Leo saying he’s nothing without his family is a double edged sword really#because the thought of his family alone is all he needs to live. to hope.#to smile#nothing without them…but they’re EVERYTHING to him#and maybe he doesn’t realize it but…the feeling is mutual#one thing too is that hope that comforts Leo so much is not just that#should he think his family needs help - that hope can turn into determination#I’m unwell about this family#actually on my point of their powers - I truly do think the abilities tie in not only to their personalities#but to their relationship to family and love in general#kinda like love languages in a way#Mikey with his chains and time abilities values being around his family the most - he wants them to experience living in the moment togethe#Donnie is someone who is 100% a gift giver to show his love - his constructs are exactly that aren’t they? gifts of his mind#Raph is someone who willingly bears the weight of the shield - he protects his family like the best big brother possible#and Leo - he goes off on his own a lot but his mind is constantly on his family anyway#like a sailor at sea no matter how far he travels the compass always point in one direction - and for him that compass points home#even if he can’t make it back - it’s still there#and that’s enough
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The most terrifying creature of all
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan jingyi#lan sizhui#ouyang zizhen#nameless red disciple#Absolutely none of these people should ever be allowed in a haunted house#Except maybe LSZ#The juniors would either 1) Cry 2) punch one of the staff 3) pee a little bit 4) break something in fear. Dreadful patrons.#and they are supposed to be in training for dealing with the supernatural too! SMH!#I did enjoy drawing them cuddled up though B*)#WWX is banned from haunted houses too because he tries to get himself involved as one of the scare-ers. Which is a violation of union code#He's 'trying to make the experience more enriching' but in reality he just likes to get a reaction out of people.#Truly a guy you go to a corn maze with only to get separated from him.#And when you do find him he's face down what looks like his own blood#As you try and check to see if he's okay he suddenly grabs your ankles and starts spitting lines from the exorcist#Then laughs when you scream#Truly a guy who is NOT getting a second date#Next episode features something very very scary. Universally so.#a t-t-t-teen girl.#LJY is curled up on the ground btw. Joining the JC sock puppet that has also been just out of sight this entire time
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Remembering that time I had a borderline sexual encounter with a sleep paralysis hallucination. That was honestly so fun it almost makes me wish I'd get sleep paralysis again but sleep paralysis is very much Not always guaranteed to be fun, so. Idk
#its always a lil scary at first before i realize im just having sleep paralysis#luckily i havent had any truly horrifying experiences with it. (yet). hopefully itll stay that way
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being homesick and changing as a person so much the place you grew up in isn't your home anymore is such a core part of ati and upon further inspection i think i was projecting a little
#like yea that is a very common basic thing that happens to a lot if not most adults#but also i think i get homesick a bit too easy#when i moved away from home i moved to the closest big city that's only an hour away and i was already deeply familiar with it#but i was so sad despite knowing i personally could never thrive in my hometown#i wanted to experience the big city but it was so scary and it still is and i miss the comforts of my hometown but it's not just me that#has changed#dont get me wrong i wouldnt move back bc i have hobbies and friends and a job and most likely a career in the city i live in#and this truly is a place i don't think i could ever move away from. unless it is to a neighboring city#it's so hard for me to imagine there are people who move not just across the country but a completely different country and they just. adap#i could never. i was visiting my hometown every week for like the first year i lived here#i eventually want to move to a bigger apartment and ive been looking at places already even tho i need to graduate before doing that#and i'm. getting homesick just thinking about moving to a different part of the city.#i like the area i live in. i like the cornerstore and the distance to the closest grocery stores and parks#i like how my grandma used to live in this area when she was around my age#i'm not good with change and i know it but there are several things about moving that make me miserable#like yeah obviously i will move out from my single bedroom apartment when i can and i'll be so happy and it'll be good for me#but despite having lived here for only a bit more than 4 years i'll miss this apartment. i have so many good memories from here and i'll#never be able to visit it again and have it feel the same#but that's the least sad thing imo. i dread being in a different area more lmao#but it's fine i know i'll adapt as long as i don't have to move to a different city ever again gfsahgak#idk ive had a long day and im feeling a bit melancholic#i'll sleep in tomorrow >:3c#leevi talks
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Something in the back of my mind has been bothering me for a long while, and I figured out what it was. I have this tendency of censoring myself when I speak? I dance around a subject, which I keep hinting at, but never explicitly say what I want to say, and when someone doesn’t pick up on that, I get disappointed when they don’t help me open up to the topic.
#the disappointment deepens and I guess the fear of truly opening up of showing my self flaws and all is scary#in short I’m scared to have an opinion!!!#also when people ask me what I’m into reading to watching oh man I feel the pressure to pitch it and possibly defend it#and instead I just vaguely share what it’s about for the sake of not spoiling the experience#then the envy I feel when other ppl share wholeheartedly what they love and take their time with it explaining#and they explain it so clearly and I wish I could do that#click clack#the problem was so vague it’s taken me awhile to discern#I’m guessing this all stems from being made fun of or dismissed for my interests 😔#a long time ago but the effects still linger#the fear of being perceived is all wrapped in me#I do the same thing here. it bleeds to all the ways of socializing this day and age#I wish I were one of those ppl who have a more lively social life online and talking to ppl regularly#but my first instinct to a message is to close the notification and leave it for later because it’s so intimidating!!!#it feels like I have to perform an image that’s guaranteed to be liked rather than just be me authentically#ok I got to the crux phewwww uhhh lol got all my vulnerabilities out in the middle of the night
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:(
#got pulled over.#for speeding apparently but I mean I was just going with the flow of traffic so#but anyway it was extremely scary and I'm basically still crying#truly a supremely bad experience#i mean the cop was fine like he was perfectly pleasant and just gave me a warning#so it went as well as it could have#but im just a nervous wreck so it was genuinely very upsetting.#also im all sweaty i guess from nervousness but also it's spring#and as soon as the weather gets above 70 im sweating like its a sauna.#all in all having a really bad time right now
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i thought i was hallucinating boss battle music but it turns out irs just raining heavily enough outside my window to make it sound exactly like dramatic music
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"Psychosis is neither good or bad"
"Psychosis is not a crisis, it can be a positive experience!"
"In some cultures, psychosis..."
NO. Nononono. Psychosis is bad. Psychosis is scary and requires treatment, even if some forms of it make you feel euphoric or enlightened or whatever.
I can't believe we have to perpetuate the narrative that psychosis is a misunderstood otherworldly experience just for people not to hate us. Hello? Can we just... not hate people with "scary" symptoms without having to make them digestible and relatable? Can we just do that instead?
#not tagging because i don't have energy to argue#or deal with things like “just because your experience was a negative one it doesn't make it universal”#i'm talking about extreme and problematic views here btw#just because someone said psychotic people are not scary or violent it doesn't make them the target audience for this post#i mean a totally different thing#i have non-psychotic people asking me wild stuff these days#“do you think your psychotic episodes were a valuable experience”#“did you learn more about yourself?”#“would you choose to not have it?”#bro ofc i don't want manic psychosis!!!#it's not an acid trip or whatever#what did i learn? i learned that the government is spying on me through my own eyes and the seams in my clothes#i learned that i must run around naked and eat snow off the ground because my veins are literally on fire#mmmm truly enlightening
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when i was younger this whole ''no romantic or sexual experience" thing made me feel deeply unlovable and it still does but in a different way. now i've somehow convinced myself that i'm not supposed to desire anyone like that. like it's not meant for me. it's me who can't love now. not other people.
#feeling emo#no but i'm literally the problem cause it's not like i'm trying to ''put myself out there''#but it's too scary and i don't want to and i'm not ready and there's no time and i like the routine of being alone#i've had crushes before and they were strong and lasted honestly too long for being crushes#but that's too far away from now#and i always looked at myself as the girl who won't get the boy#the crush was always unrequited#i was okay with only looking cause it's not like there's anything other than that for a girl like me#living life in a larger body is truly not a kind experience#there's so many other things that made relationship and love scary for me but being fat is the biggest reason for not even trying#and they you talk to your skinny friends and hear their experience with men and it's so awful for the most part#and then you think well if they treat them that way how would i be treated#i just don't want to be hurt#or hurt someone else#i'm used to at looking at love from a distance and i'll live anyway#some days it just harder than others#like the hard part is that i feel like im doing something wrong#like im living life wrong like i shouldn't be this uncomfortable and scared#so often it happens that i just can't relate to other people my age#like im too serious and in my head to be fun and get drunk at parties#and to serious and in my head to be in love and be loved and be seen#they all have this more casual stance on romance and they'll make out with people in the dorm bathrooms but i can't do that#and i don't want to either#i'm slow and boring and it would probably take six months to prepare myself for a kiss#it all seems so big to me#lovely feeling we're having tonight#personal
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OHHHHH MY GOD COMING OFF ANON BECAUSE !??!?!? SCPSL MENTIOn!!?!??!? you are the ONLY person i've EVER seen that mentioned that game in being similar to lethal company ohhhh my god oh my god i used to be so crazy autism over that game Okay. okay. oh my godddd I LOVE(D) SCPSL SO MUCH and it makes me so so so happy to see a game like it get so popular!!! i love lethal company!!! and i love the creatures and the randomly generated facilities and the PROXIMITY chat and the lore (sigurd adn desmond<3) and i love that ALL MY FRIENDS CAN AND DO PLAY ITTT ^__^ its like 14 year old me got blessed by the autism fairy joy and beauty to the world
i don’t know how to say this in a way that wont make me sound like i shouldnt be allowed in public spaces so i’ll just go ahead and say it. I have 200 hours in scpsl
#i havent played it in like 2 or 3 years because one day#it just stopped working on win7. But i got win10 now so theoretically i could play it again. but do i want to#it’s not that it’s a bad game! like i said i’ve had a lot of fun with it. just like lethal company it has some truly#hilarious and truly scary moments#however i can remember a few times where it was just not fun ….. maybe it was the players or the unfair balance or wjatever. But well#i did love it. i love scp and getting to play an scp game for free was life changing to me. IT WAS SO FUN!!#AND I HAD THE MOST BLISSFUL GAMING EXPERIENCE BECAUSE I HAD A BUG WITH MY GAME WHERE I COULDNT HEAR ANYONE AND NO ONE COULD HEAR ME#Probably pissed off my teammates numerous times but well . At least got to exclusively vc with my friends on discord#i think the thing with lethal company (and by extension amogus which is also smth i associate lc with) is that you can play it exclusively#with your buddies. you dont have to join some random ass lobby with random ass people just because the game needs 20 players. U can just#have actual fun. because yes proxy vc is a fun feature for a game but i am seriously grateful that scpsl was bugged for me#i’ve played a lot of ‘shooter’ games (or just games similar to genre) and like Sure im used to people being jerks in game chat or something#but there’s a difference between game chat and straigjt up vc ….. so yeah. i know that it’s barely scpsl’s fault but i just felt like sayin#all that. Blinks#where am i . what am i talking about#sorry for the weird not quite rant about scpsl BUT YES i do think lethal company is quite similar to it. And like if that game was fun again#not to mention the creatures!!! like. coilhead? 173 but well it’s a common trope. eyeless dog? literally 939. A MASK THAT POSSESSES YOU?#DUDE . THIS IS 035 . BRACKEN? okay that’s like 096 but a little to the left#all they need to do now is add a 049 adjacent creature Or perhaps an evil ai computer that locks you in the building or makes landmines#explode on their own. i dont even know. zeekeers hire me#and yeah i love the rng of it all because it makes for a uniquely hilarious/terrifying experience each time. Something it sucks so bad and#you get a facility with like 1 door which is locked. but that too is funny. to me lc isnt about winning it’s about dying in the funniest way#sigmund and desmond lore is also rly good <3 i hope it gets expanded upon. Would love to see some more worldbuilding stuff like WHATHAPPENED#cramswering#anyway. it has been years since i played scpsl and i know tjat they did a bunch of updates and added a bunch of scps . So i dont know if the#game is better or worse now. and i dont know if i want to find out…. what if my game becomes unbugged and i hear people#now THAT’S real horror game material if you ask me
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OOF it's been a while since I've had a nightmare visceral enough to wake me up from a dead sleep into straight terror... But I guess I shouldn't have underestimated how much my brain would pick up from a podcast Teirlisting Horror Games. .....
(I go on to describe the dream in the tags so watch out if you don't want to hear descriptions of the horrors my brain can cook up.. cw Body Horror mostly)
#monster noises#I thought it would be Fine because they weren't Playing the Games or Experiencing the Narrative#but i guess they were talking about Enough details and things my brain already knew that the Terror Machine that runs my sleep was like#OHOHOHO..... Ingredience#the Idea was i was playing a video game level but i was In the POV#and at first it was just a creepy apartment#but then weird ghost kids started showing up and i had to get them all#which was more annoying than scary until one of them dislocated several joints and started Yelling#and the quickly the lights were out and i had a flashlight and I had to hide from this monster called 'The Granny'#and it mechanically it was one of those things that can't see but Can hear but it also had like Seeking Tendrils#and I was attempting to hide under a table but i couldn t get under fast enough without making a bunch of noise#and the tendrils coming in way too close#and then it Screamed and started after me but i was stuck under the table and had to try and blindly back up to the door#while crouch-carrying the table#and the tension and fear of that experience was so high i shot awake in complete fear with my heart Pounding#and it's still not back to like.. level#but like truly this thing was Awful#very well could have been an official silent hill creature#the opposite of when you wake up in terror from a dream and the thing you were afraid of was actually pretty ridiculous#you wake up from seeing this thing and go 'alright yeah okay that's fair i'm Fully also afraid of that'#it's like#.. a desecated large human head#on the end of neck like a snake's body#but it's just bones and bits of driedout flesh#and it's body a jumbled mass of bones and sinews with long distinct skinless dried out limbs coming out of it#that it pawed along low to the ground with#the whole thing was drapped in a filthy shroud and coloured this dark dark tan#like Mummy Colour#i'm sure you know what I mean#but it was Awful
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After unlocking all achievements in pathologic 2 and 72 hours of playing (and that's JUST haruspex! Imagine what I will be like when (🥹) the other two campaigns come out), I have Thoughts about the game just like I did for Patho 1 that I find myself currently unable to explain but I will maybe try to find a short description for this game: a masterpiece of pain.
Also you must play imago at least once, because it's worth it. I don't know what but it is worth it. (And also once you've beaten that every other playthrough is gonna feel easier)
Just like fear and hunger 1 and 2, although I loved both games in both series, the thought of replaying the respective first one, despite my love of the ambiance and characters etc, fills me with DREAD. Replaying the second game? I'll do it. It'll be painful and annoying and maddening and I will have to be very careful it doesn't trigger my ocd obsessions about having to finish that section now and today because oh boy then I'm gonna lose 4 hours of my life in the fucking abbatoir but I will replay the game and in the end, I'll enjoy it.
Idk even with both second games not being fully completed yet, I find the experimentation you can pull in a playthrough incredibly interesting. While the respective first game is doomed to remain a somewhat unfinished beauty.
#pathologic#fear and hunger#pathologic classic hd#fear and hunger 2 termina#pathologic 2#funger#fear and hunger termina#pathologic 1#patho#so many tags and i hope i got all of them haha#Mari plays videogames#i love when horror games don't scare me#at least the scary part for me in both cases is the thought of having to replay particularly annoying sections#if i truly found these games scary I wouldn't be able to even play them and i would have missed out on then wondeful world they made me#experience#either that or im getting stronger at handling horror#ocd talk#personal#etc etc
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God I really really wish for Norel to be intimidating but he's like a wet napkin to me, completed with a technical sugar mummy
Help me
#thylacines can talk#faaf au#cant even take my own villain seriously#yeah on paper he's scary. like how he can just manipulate people and lie his way to the top and appear like such a sweet genuine guy but#hes actually a coldhearted monster who experiments on people and CHILDREN. hes done truly horrifying chilling things#but hes like a pug to me. you breath on him wrong and hes gonna keel over. his god complex is kinda funny
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we have discovered the biggest roach ive ever not seen (it was described to me as my brave dog and roommate removed its accidentally squished ( :0[[[[[ ) corpse today) and aahhhh. aahhh oh my god. HHH oh my god oh my god help help help help help
#there's rlly not roaches like this back in the midwest!!!!!#scary! ah! ih my god#house centipedes and roaches only bugs to TRULY freak me out#i do not hate them for this and i am working on it#(i wont kill them on purpose for the record)#but#ah ah ah ah . AH#freaky bad no thank you#aahh#help#a .#unpleasant bug experiences all around so far !!#which sucks bc i love bug!!!!!!!!!!!#we THINK it might've just been on something that was delivered today but#HELP .#i am much more freaked out by the thought of accidentally killing the bug out of fear than i am the bug itself#bbleerrgh
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