#a moments peace prob would have been nice

[dreamofstarlight]

Just casually trying to eat and have a conversation while paparazzi are literally right next to the table

[thedarkmongoose]

SPOILERS: i have mixed feelings about the bear s3 but knowing that s3 & s4 were written/filmed at the same time makes sense. s4 will prob answer s3's q's. (A LOT was left open-ended) usually i love that, but it felt like the show lost itself in certain places, esp the self-indulgent finale. all stories are indulgent to some degree, but too much decadence rarely leaves room for substance.

and i get why they tried to do the chef's table thing, but other than andrea, syd, and luca, everyone else's acting was disjointed and trite. but i loved ep 1; it was an ethereal, artsy, meditative piece (peace) that was necessary after the chaotic s2 finale. however, as a big fan of the show, it was hard for me to finish the eps.

the standout in s3 FOR SURE was tina's ep - directed by ayo. glad we got her backstory. personally i liked her anxiety-inducing job hunt bc it's really like that irl, esp for older woc. the sobbing while eating a free sandwich was relatable, and the mikey convo was super impactful. but as much as i loved the ep, it still felt superficial compared to s2 'forks' (richie) or 'honeydew' (marcus). we never see her son again either; all we get is tina yelling at him to quiet down.

then there was marcus's mother's funeral which seemed like it was going to be more central to the plot than it was. i wish we got more. and claire is still one of the most underwritten characters EVER. nothing about her or the mis en scène really sells it that she's a doctor lol. and the scene with the faks trying to apologize on carmy's behalf was beyond cringe. i like matty matheson - i have his cookbook, but there was entirely too many faks in s3.

and let's be real: where was ebra & sweeps? ebra has such an interesting story that i'm HOPING we get to see in s4. sweeps too - he tried out for the chicago cubs! but on a positive note, i loved the chemistry between syd/luca. it was v sweet and organic. wonder if they'll be a thing in s4 since luca is carmy's foil. too bad marcus was barely in s3, tho the hug between him & luca at the party was cute. syd's meltdown mirroring carmy's in s2 was also a nice touch.

idk how to feel about sugar's labor scene. most praise it, but it didn't hit the same for me. donna's over-acting (the whole series) is really distracting and i can't take her seriously. ik she's supposed to be mentally unwell, but it borders on cartoonish. the hospital moment was heartwarming, but again, artificially. and pete was so underwritten too, just so they could have that mom moment. i liked the scene with him and syd tho. it felt authentically awkward.

i also understand what they were trying to do with the finale, but it was a flop for me. the scene with andrea/carmy staring out into the chicago night was introspective and beautiful, but the msg doesn't hit all the way bc we have a group of wealthy celeb chefs saying it's okay to stop while you're ahead and enjoy life while you can. every second counts. unfortunately for those who are not celeb chefs, it's not that easy to simply "enjoy life."

on one hand, i agree that food is life and restaurants have been community "third places" forever (essential to life itself; historically, like when revolutionaries would gather at pubs or cafes). however, do i think that fine dining and the "art" that comes with it is necessary? no. if there were more spots like the original beef/bear in the world tho, that would be a good thing.

[2dboisloyal-devotee]

coping mechanism real

>)~ONESHOT

Never Could Have Been Worse (Vash the Stampede x Gender Neutral Reader)

Summary: Reader has been feeling fearful and avoid going outside because of the lurking dangers when they meet the Humanoid Typhoon himself.

Warning: reader being held at gunpoint, very little shooting action

You nervously smile as the innkeeper woman is wearing you down with another scold early up in the morning. “This has been a week and don't think that I'm gonna fall for it even if your made up reasons are different every time! Honestly, I think I've already been too lenient on you but you're not picking yourself up either so you're going to—oh hey Vash! Come here!”

The blond man in crimson trenchcoat looks up as he approaches her with a clueless smile. “ssup, lady? Ya need something?”

“Damn right, I do, accompany this person out and find a job for them. I really can't handle them being around cooped up in here anymore for 7 days straight!” she leaves you with a pat on the shoulder and whispers. “Good luck, you'll really need it.”

Quickly you glance between her back and his tilting face. “You doing alright?” he asks, gently smiling.

With a hesitant nod, you answer him while wondering if he's that Vash the Stampede. “Yeah... um, I'm fine, sorry I got you in a bind I ..didn't even wanted.” your sigh is followed by his perking up voice.

“Don't mind me! Hey, how 'bout we take a stroll outside? Maybe tell me your thoughts while we're at it?” Vash points at the door with his thumb.

On the way, you tell him about how your circumstances led you to stay in the inn before getting kicked out is just like any other day—a bad habit of your cowardly self trying to avoid danger in these wild places. Whenever you're out, you just feel as if anything could happen to put you in a death's chokehold for a good moment.

“Ah, I know the feeling, you ain't alone there... I wish the reaper would buzz off for once darn it!” he dabs his tears with a handkerchief out of nowhere.

It's weird that the so-called paranoid feeling is disappearing down bit by bit as you're walking in peace with him.

“I'm just glad you're surviving till this moment—”

You come to a pause behind Vash. A gun aimed at your temple by a man who raises his voice roughly. “Put your weapons down if you don't want this person hurt, Vash the Stampede!”

You nearly smack a hand to your face. Of course you got to be involved with the guy himself, he's like the whirlpool of dangers at this point.

Vash stops without turning his back. He pulls out the guns from his pocket in a slow motion. “Now, now, let's solve this peacefully yeah? I wouldn't want anybody get hurt y'know!”

The man behind you shouts again. “I-if you do what I said!!” he releases the safety luck on the gun in a shaking grip.

Risking it, you are about to send a kick backwards but Vash already went straight to shot the man's gun out his hand.

With you stepping aside and securing the gun, Vash walks closer towards him when two girls come out of nowhere—already tying up the guy for good. “Thank God that doesn't result in other casualties.” The shorter one of them speaks up, agreed by the other with long hair beside her.

“Good job for another one, Mr. Vash!”

“No probs.” he turns to you with a faltering smile. “Are you alright? That must've been real scary for you. My bad.” Vash scratches his head as he slumps down, dejected.

“It's fine, you saved me anyway. Then, are you really... Vash the Stampede?”

He raises his eyebrows. “That's me a'ight.”

“At least you're not as scary as I thought, I'm glad you're just a nice guy overall. Thank you.” You smile.

“...Aww—haha, thanks, but I'm not that—”

The long-haired girl claps her hands as her statement is backed up by the short girl's sigh. “Congratulations, Mr. Vash! You finally get yourself a friend who appreciates you!”

“Gee, is the world coming to an end? I kind of feel worried...”

“You girls don't have to be that cruel...” Vash mumbles, about to cry.

Amidst of their bickering, you let out a small laughter which Vash takes notice in. He walks to your side. “Are you feeling better now? That stroll wasn't so bad now, was it? 'scuse me for the gun part though.” He muster up a smile.

“...Thanks to you. But honestly, I'm thinking it will be worsening from here on out. Am I even going to survive just by myself..?”

He narrows his eyes, staring at you intensely. “That shouldn't do! You should survive, you will! You've come this far already, don'tcha think that's big enough of an impact you have?”

“Well, true but I—”

You nod. In the near future, you two will meet again someday after you improve yourself better, having enough courage and experience to go explore with him. You both say your goodbyes to each other then leave with your back turned on the opposite way as he waves off.

“No buts! And you don't have to be that rough with yourself.” He gives you a warm grin and pats your back. “It won't be easy but you still got yourself standing here, I believe in you! By that, I hope you can believe in yourself sooner or later. Take your steps slow and steady, you hear me?”

“Remember; love and peace, that includes yourself. See ya later!”

[inthedreamatorium1]

Episode 7 is?? Perfect??

My incoherent thoughts below.

Colin crying? CRYING? I was dreading that confrontation at the start of the episode but choosing to use the shot of Luke crying made it so much more devastating. Sure, you could have had him yelling and being loud and angry, which is justified. But to be quietly and tearfully DEVASTATED? With the tears running down his cheeks? Uff. Punch me harder in the gut, why don't you Luke.

I got a brief Penelope-Benedict interaction. I'm THRIVING.

I really enjoy Colin grappling with his beloved Pen being LW. I live for the angst.

Portia is a pleasant surprise. She's always wanted what's best for her daughters and has never apologized for that. But I also appreciate her being honest with Penelope about why she is the way she is, and that she's trying to be better. That's what I wanted with this season and I'm so happy Penelope is receptive to it.

(I also need a special one-off series with a young Violet and Portia SO badly. These two have a history that goes beyond being neighbors. I need to know more)

Violet falling victim to what her children endured when they met someone they were attracted to? Karma.

I do love John and I'm going to pretend that what's going to happen isn't actually going to happen. He's so sweet on Francesca.

The Genevieve and Penelope scene was so lovely. Gen dropping her accent with Pen because they each know the other so well. Gosh, I wish Gen could have been at their wedding.

The "WHAT GOOD AM I TO YOU?" leading into sex? UMMMM. HELLO? They're constantly horny for each other, we are so hashtag blessed. Also, there is nothing Colin loves more than sticking his fingers into Pen. I said what I said.

Kate-Anthony-Colin was a nice surprise but I should stop being surprised. Jess has done an amazing job linking the Bridgertons together this season.

THE WEDDING?! Their nods to each other, letting the other know that they're okay, that they want this was so beautiful. And to top it off, Eloise cried. My love.

Also? Prudence crying at their wedding? SOB

The Benedict and Eloise scene at the wedding? I'm so torn about who I think the next season main is going to be but I know whoever's season it is, the other will be very much apart of it. These two are so close, how could they not? Both of them are feeling lost this season. Unsure of their place in society, unsure of how to feel about love. I just want them to find peace and love.

Kate and Anthony are very sweet and they're clearly explaining why Jonathan and Simone won't be in s4 much but to travel to India while she's probs 6 months pregnant is... a bold choice.

The wedding dance to "You Belong To Me" was so perfect. I love that it turned into just them dancing because no one else mattered in that moment. They were just two people, who love each other deeply. And the soft way Colin ran his fingers down her cheek SWOON. If the Queen hadn't shown up when she did, he absolutely would have kissed her. He started to lean down!

PENELOPE WAS ABOUT TO STEP FORWARD. I think we can all agree that Colin would not have handled that well if she hadn't been interrupted.

Penelope and Eloise reuniting. Okay, I cried.

Bisexual Benedict RISE. I'm honestly sooooooo surprised they revisited it as I thought it was just a tease from season 1. I'm excited for him to meet his Sophie but I'm also excited for him to explore his sexuality before doing so.

(also Luke Thompson kissing a man? Here for it)

I suspected that they'd follow the books and have Cressida find out about Penelope but I wasn't sure how exactly she would do that. It was really clever how they did it. As of now, I really do sympathize with what Cressida is going through and I think her doing what she can to take ownership of her live is great. How that's going to turn out for her in the last episode (and therefore how I'm going to feel about it) is another story.

[kitkats-and-kittens]

Does anyone else find the trope in media where Humans find either an extra terrestrial race, or a god, or any other being that is physically, or mentally superior to humanity and we teach them empathy, super annoying?

Maybe it’s a niche pet peeve but It always feels like we’re shoving are own sense of morality on beings that it doesn’t or shouldn’t apply to.

Like I get how in shows you wanna teach people good and bad and that being empathetic is a good thing but can’t they do that with actual humans?

The best example I can think of on the fly is Dream of the Endless from Sandman. Spoilers if you haven’t watched the show.

I can’t remember the exact episode number, but I know it was in season 1. He met Johanna Constantine and went to go get some sand from where she’d left it at her ex girlfriend’s house. Long story short her gf turned out to be dying because of the sand and Dream ends up taking it back and leaving at which point Johanna gets upset and basically berates him for leaving her ex girlfriend to die in pain.

In the end he decides to listen to her and puts the girl to rest in a peaceful way and I don’t know why but I’ve always hated how that scene was resolved.

Like obviously it’s nice and he’s doing a good thing but I also don’t like how eldritch beings who’ve been alive for thousands upon thousands of years are framed badly because they don’t care for human lives. Its not as though they have a reason to care and honestly I think humanity as a whole overestimates is actual importance in the grand scheme of the universe.

(but that’s another conversation)

Still I just think it seems kind of arrogant to present our own kind of black and white morality system as the basis and expect beings that simply don’t operate the same way as us to abide by it.

It’s also something I noticed in Pjo. Like yea the Gods are assholes but that’s by a human comparison which we can’t judge them by, because they aren’t human.

If I’m being honest the Gods are a lot nicer than they should be all things considered. Like if you have the power to absolutely obliterate anyone who you deemed even slightly annoying then yea that would probs go to your head but it’s not as though they can help that.

And sure neglecting your children isn’t great, but considering that for Gods like Zeus their frame of reference for bad parenting is having their dad literally swallow them alive the moment they were born in their eyes they probably think they’re doing pretty well for themselves.

And sure they live amongst humanity, in a detached of way, but when we’re the equivalent of annoying insects that buzz around there bedroom it makes a lot of sense why they don’t care and I honestly don’t understand why we should force them to. They operate under their own sense of morals and justice as weird and twisted they may be to us and I really wish shows and media would explore that idea more.

[cassie-moore]

Making late lunch-been working like crazy calls w 12 countries now time zone is peace for a bit

Glance at this - have a draft

I didnt log feeling draft-reading back on it. My feelings are always so raw late at night. Maybe because my heart is more open and i allow my thoughts/mind and heart to communicate. I feel like during day I block them from eachother (maybe a survival tactic i developed to protect my heart idk)

Last nights raw…

TR whole thing to feel 5/16

Got an alert he posted im too afraid to look at moment or i wont be able to get that sleep. Too much info in my dm, and im too sick of seeing her. Dont know if shes w him again out there. But if i saw her out there w him i wouldnt be able to even process it let alone check absorb that before i went to sleep. If shes not there w him, im sure shes sending him selfies of her face prob looking pouty that shes not w him. Or if he asked her not, it would prob last a week and then pick right bk up when she got comfortable again. Because its who she is.

Been seeing pictures of her taking pictures of the sidewalk or herself for an entire year of my life. If anyones posts could make someone feel like theyre losing braincells, its hers.

Its somehow not even the posts or array but more the fact that you know that prob six of her seven days a week are centered around her posting on the gram

I dont get it, yet he must think thats normal for a girl? Idk

By my late twenties i had my series 7 63 65 and 31. Had already lived for a couple yrs and been an actress in LA, Built a $65 million dollar book of business that had nothing to do w my dads team at ms

Fck.. The Ptree Group manages like $14 Billion in assets now, and just landed The Weather Channels stock plan

Point - im so damn terrified inside my heart that he is will choose this chick forever. I dont know if Id be more depressed for myself or for him . Having to watch her alongside him was like watching paint dry for a year (literally) …i cant do it anymore

My average looking non-famous guy friends said theyd choose me no question over that (two saying they didnt find her attractive), but yet the man of my life who stamped his name in music so hard that he has fan girls scrambling in their heels everywhere around the globe chooses to be in an actual relationship with her. Potentially even marriage. The whole thing has felt like a mind fuck for me to wrap my head around and my biggest fears lies in the fact that the only part that makes sense for me exists in his arms

Thre it is. Yearning ache again

I just feel like deep down shes a girl shell of person his persona g-e would have entertained for a night before but now, deep down i just feel like the real Gerald would no way green earth give up his intellect or creative or drive to appease her laziness and ever stay happy about it

Log all these feelings, sleep them off, come out of cocoon, take a hot shower - crawl in bed. Think about how nice if would be in bed with him - under covers naked w him - fall asleep to that

[hausofmamadas]

| The sweet, sweet sounds of Dinarrón |

⁂

Pairing: Dinarrón (Dina Arellano Félix x David Barrón Corona)

For @narcosfandomdiscordNarcOctober - Day 30 - Day of Amnesty (originally Day 3 - Day of Music)

Prompt: Create and post a playlist for fic/wip of yours OR your favorite episode and explain why each song resonates for that fic/wip or episode

Word count: ≈ :yodib:

The playlist -> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7DrO59HcsobbbmnVDEjLBX?si=3lcETYcXR6eDv-G_so1eBw

Since the playlist is over 100 songs, I couldn't go over every one and its place within the Dinarrón pantheon, so I decided to pick the most enduring, impactful ones and share some of the brain virus thought process and inspo for the as-of-yet unpublished Dinarrón saga whose page count will prob give War And Peace a run for its money if I can even manage to start releasing the thing to begin with:

⁂

Blue Jeans and Born to Die - Lana del Rey

Both of these songs are basically the madness that started it all so we all have problematic fav, Lana, to thank for the Dinarrón madness that’s taken my brain hostage and effectively turned me into a psy op for my otp whose sole purpose is to construct the world in which they plausibly exist and accumulate hapless converts to my cause Nothing lyrically especially screams Dinarrón so much as it is the vibes, although the “you fit me better than my favorite sweater and I know that love is mean, and love hurts. But I still remember that day we met in December, oh baby, I will love you till the end of time. I would wait a million years. As long as you remember that you’re mine” of Blue Jeans definitely reflects their relationship dynamic or rather the one that exists in my head. Namely, the fact that they just innately get each other bc due to their shared like outsider/insider status albeit for diff reasons when it comes to the family business.

Better Version - Sabrina Claudio

So, I actually have @narcolini to thank for this life ruining song bc even though Lana was the introduction, this was the song that really solidified the madness. Like I don’t know that I would’ve continued writing for them, were it not for this song bc I shit you not, it could’ve been written for the Movie In My Head for a lush, slo-mo montage of their most tender moments, as Dina’s reminiscing on the good times while she’s actively planning her wedding to Claudio. Fíjate bien, mis compas:

More frequent visits would’ve been nice. But I don’t want you knowing that there’s somebody new. Sometimes the guilt will clog up my mind. But is it cheating if I love a better version of you? Cause he is perfect, everything I give him, he deserves it. Rarely does he ever come to see me. But any time he does, he makes it worth it, like I earned it. God, I love him. And when I’m with you, I can’t help myself but only think about him. I can’t wait to see him again. My god I miss him. And when I’m with you, I’m just thinking ‘bout how much I wish it was him. I can’t wait to see him again.

Granted, I don’t think Dina doesn’t love Claudio but she can’t help but still hold a candle for my boy, B. And she feeeeeels reaaaaaal extra fucking guilty any time she considers that Barrón might’ve been a better partner given the reality of the industry they’re in which she’ll find out the hard way. RIP to a homie, Claudio. Sosorry I have to keep your canon death in my Russian novel to further the goals of getting these two to bang it out and run off into the sunset together but you just didn’t shine quite like Our Boy at Christine’s, my dude. It’s okay, not everyone was made to be that cool under pressure sksks

lo que pasó - Nina Cobham

alright, so here's another life-ruining pick by @narcolini who tbh is like the co-compiler of this playlist I don't think it's an exaggeration to say that they've picked at least like 35% of the songs here and sent them to me for fevered, demented consumption sksks and I nearly fell to my knees the first time I heard it and DO YOU KNOW WHY????????? JUST A TAKE A GOTDAMN LOOK FOR YOURSELF:

Lo que pasó, ya no duele tanto Think that I can move on but I'm not sure ... what you want from me ... if you want from me Tú me has esperando tanto tiempo [You've waited for me for so long] Ya me tienes donde quieres [You have me where you want me] Y no te das cuenta [And you don't even realize]

in addition to,

Me dejas sin palabras. [You leave me speechless.] But what does it matter? If I told you how I'm feeling would you feel it too? I don't speak with so much fluency Words don't come so easily as they used to I think I got it but it's not it, and it throws me off You're a constant learning curve for me Pa' qué lo sabes How much, how much, could I make it any more obvious? ... Probably

I MEANNNNALSDKJF;ALKSJDFJ;AKJ can you think of another song that better captures Barrón's struggle to express himself in even the most casual, mundane situations and his tendency to compartmentalize his emotions in order to get through bc ew feelings, why would I ever deal with my trauma? are you mad? AND MANAGE TO DO THIS USING THE ALLEGORY OF ACHIEVING FLUENCY IN A LANGUAGE, IN THIS CASE BOTH THE SPANISH LANGUAGE AND THE LANGUAGE OF LOVE I'M GOING TO BE SICKDA;FLKSJD;FLAKJW;KLJ and it really just feeds into so many hcs I have in regards to their relationship like, 1) the whole fluency thing, the song's in both spanish and english, and they help each other improve in their respective languages as a way of bonding early on, 2) the tone of the song implies the object of interest/desire/heartache has the upper hand in the situation much like I think Dina would have the upper hand over Barrón bc she just would, 3) the whole "what/if you want from me" is justslkdjf;lskj saoooo0oooo Barrón, like he's not gonna act unless it's a sure thing, and at this point in the relationship despite the fact that all signs point to -> yes, you may, in fact, roll again, pass go, collect $200 dollars, she's crazy about you, hombre, do we need to hit you over the head with it for you to see he's second guessing whether Dina reciprocates Big Feelings Of Lust Love bc the class difference is so vast and he doesn't realize how actually Hot Shit he is, so he thinks it's literally insane to entertain the notion that Dina might very sensibly and understandably want to climb him like a jungle gym and any time he's close to giving way to hope and maybe broaching the topic with her, he clams back up and continues the cycle of self-inflicted torture like the good blorb he is

Cielo - Los York's

Aight, so the lyrics are sweet and romantic in a way that applies to most pairings, which means they don't speak to the Dinarrón Dynamic as much, but this song would be period-appropriate for the show and I just feel like Ramón insisted on there being a boombox in the office despite passionate protests by Mín, and everyone else who isn't filled to the brim with general anxiety and mild panic outvoted him, so now they have a boombox that's playing any time someone's there doing work. And this seems like something one of them would've played while working together at the warehouse.

Running Up That Hill - Kate Bush

This is a bit of a weird one? I guess it's less them and more Dina's POV about them. It's also contemporary the show and here's no way Dina's not into Kate Bush. I refuse to believe it. The best way I can explain why this made it on the playlist is by describing the scene in my head when I listen to it: Dina's standing at a window, looking out at the backyard of the Arellano house, contemplating the meaning of life. It's a rare cloudy day in TJ. She's newly engaged to Claudio (think early S3 long hair Dina but this would be set before S3 starts), Barrón has cried weeeweewee all the way back to the Imperial Desert to escape the crippling heartbreak of seeing her every day, knowing they'll never be together 'cause she's marrying an Actually Decent, If Not Boiler Plate dude with more status and money than he'll ever have train his dudes in the ways of paramilitary tactics, and their last convo ended somewhat tensely with him pointing out that in order to marry this guy, she'll probably have to give up any ambitions of serving the family biz in the way she always wanted bc of blahblahblah murrhsdlkjfs gEnDeR rOLeS. And right now, she's finding herself missing Barrón, wondering where he is, resenting herself for missing him and wondering where he is, resenting him for being right about giving up her ambitions, scared that him being right is going to make her resent Claudio over time and ruin their marriage, and just overall wishing he were there so she could make him understan, and what if the only way to do that is to switch places a la:

It doesn't hurt me Do you wanna feel how it feels? Do you wanna know, wanna know that it doesn't hurt me? Do you wanna hear about the deal that I'm making? You, it's you and me. And if I only could, I'd make a deal with God and get Him to swap our places. Be running up that road, be running up that hill, be running up that building.

Like^^ all that is going through her mind, staring out the window. How can she make him understand? and lowkey realizing the only way might be for them to Freaky Friday that shit skskjdlkj

You don't wanna hurt me. But see how deep the bullet lies. Unaware, I'm tearing you asunder. Oh, there is thunder in our hearts. Is there so much hate for the ones we love? Oh, tell me we both matter, don't we? You, it's you and me. It's you and me, you won't be unhappy. Come on baby, come on darling. Let me steal this moment from you now. Come on angel, come on, come on darling. Let's exchange the experience, oh.

^^ this part slaps particularly hard for the "Is there so much hate for the ones we love? Tell me we both matter" bc Dina gets that poor Davidito is having a rough time. It hurts her to hurt him this way, but she's also a bit, "Can you not find it in your heart not to hate/be mad at me? It's not like I didn't think about this decision entensively and arrive at the conclusion that sacrificing my professional goals is worth it to further the goals of teh family and I do forrealsies love this guy. Like damn, can a woman get a break pls. also pls don't hate me cuzIstillloveyoukbye"

El Muerto - Los Muchachos

god, I could write an actual fucking PhD dissertation on why this song is emblematic of my boy but this is alreayd long asf so I'll just break it down like this.

Mi gente la espalda me cuida [(I know) my people got my back] En cualquier misión suicida [on any suicide mission] Que todos con todos lo que ando son soldados [That all those I roll with are soldiers] Un hermano está en la fría, [A brother out in the cold] Otro hermano ya está arriba [another already above] Y lo que quiero es tenerlo aquí por mi lado [All I want is him here by my side] Pa' fumarnos un cigarro de maría [to smoke a joint] Como antes lo que hacíamos [like we used to do] Cuando la vida no era tan complicada [back when life wasn't so complicated]

Obviously, color me inconsolable bc of the brother references and how well it lines up with Bugsy, out in the cold (in prison for life) and Matteo, already upstairs (BC THEY KILT MY BABY BOI DEAD) but it all began with the opening lines aka clearly Barrón's sentiments upon hearing of Dina's engagement, "Pensaban que estaba muerto pero solo andaba de parranda. Sí me fui de la ciudad fue para curar mi dolor interno" which like.... so, maybe he doesn't actually flee Tijuana without telling anyone, is gone long enough for the Arellanos to wonder if he didn't somehow get himself killed, and turn out to really just be on a bender bc he needed to escape the deep anguish and personal devastation of losing his lady love ... but that doesn't mean he didn't consider it as an option very, very seriously

Killing Me - Omar Apollo

Another @narcolini pick, and this one has it all when it comes to Barrón internal strife and turmoil: questioning his sanity for being in the Business of Crimes, thinking bout how Dina's prob the only person he feels comfortable revealing himself to in any capacity except Bugsy, thinking about how that gives her way too much power over him and is tehrefore fucking terrifying, and daydreaming of making sweet, sweet love to the Woman of His Dreams. For your consideration:

There ain't nobody but us. Love me like I'm gonna die. Fuck me like you fantasize. Touch me like you know you provide to, ain't one to lie to, just wanna slide through, oh What I do makes me if I wonder if I'm alright Holding back feelings like it's the end of my life That's right, you're killing me

Lejos de Ti - Julio Jaramillo

Tbh I can't remember if I actually got this from the OG soundtrack but this is another one that is pretty self explanatory and is highly not!anachronistic. There's a few other songs on my list that rank as contenders for whatever would play in the end credits of the Dinarrón movie that's constantly playing on repeat in a projector in my brain, but this is the first one or maybe it'd be the end credits of an episode of an HBO miniseries? idk. what you guys think

Call Me In the Day - La Luz

Uhhhhhh, I can't even begin to unpack how close this song is to my heart in the Dinarrón pantheon, except to say that if I were to film the warehouse makeout scene that I wrote in Always Short to the Gate, this would be playing over it. Also, Léo RIP to a baddie dancing with Teresa in the Bolivia episode of Queen of the South polluted my mind and the sexy made it's way to Dinarrón so really, I can accept exactly no credit here

NO HAY LAY - Kali Uchis

GODDDLSKDJF;LSKJD;LKAJ okay, this is another song that inspired an elaborate scenelet in my head, which takes place after they get together but before the brothers are aware of it, so they're keeping the relationship under wraps. And as a result, this song is playing while they're getting freaky on the dancefloor yes I have a thing with dancing and these two and I have no answers or explanations except that imsorryforeverything of some trendy nightlclub that the Arellanos don't own that's like 100 miles away from TJ that they escaped off to, so they could be an real couple aka all googly eyed and loveydovey in the open. It's basically their version of date-night that's gotta be date-night on the DL bc they're both scared that if the brothers knew about it, Ramón would cut Barrón's face off and wear it to his birthday party, at the behest of Mín who is decidedly Not B's Biggest Fan at this point in the story.

If it feels so right why say it's wrong, I know you ain't had enough Sabes que yo soy la única [You know I'm the only one] que puede hacerte cosas mágicas [who can do magical things to you] Hey, en el amor no hay ley [In love there is no law] Y deja que nos miren si quieren [And let them see what they want] No matter what we do, no matter what they sayNo importa lo que digan [I don't care what they say] Yo te besaré otra vez, otra vez, otra vez [I'm gonna kiss you again, and again, and again] Bésame otra vez [Kiss me again]

For Your Precious Love - Otis Redding

I meannnnnn this legend speaks for himself, I feel like I shouldn't have to explain anything other than, pretend they got married and this is the song of their first dance and try not to throw yourself on the floor, screaming and crying. You can't

DNA - Tabi

This is more a Dina one, than a Dinarrón one, that feels like what her internal dialogue might be if she either fell out of love with Claudio after being married for some time, or began to resent him and the marriage and her having to give up her place in the AFO to play dutiful wife to someone in the public eye, or both? Like it's essentially her trying to force herself to be happy playing a role she didn't really ask for, and then eventually recognizing her independence will always be a priority to her and affirming her own need for autonomy is not something she's going to be able to suppress, no matter how hard she tries, that's just how she is and that's exactly why we love her

DNA, I don't need anybody DNA, sometimes I wish that I could change my ways I wanna need you, but I, I wanna need you, but I It's just my DNA

Banquetera - West Gold with Simpson Ahuevo

This one's mostly for the homies, specifically Barrón's homies Chato and Ziggy. The song itself is contemporary, but honestly, if we were going for period accuracy and this was in the Dinarrón Double Feature soundtrack, I would never know it was anachronistic. Like shit is right at home next to Tupac and Easy E, y'know

corazón caramelo - November Ultra

good GODDAMN okay, another @narcolini choice, that actually made me cry sksldkjfskldjflsk not just bc of the clear Dinarrón parallels but also due to Just General Life Heartache, Suffering, and Existential Dread and the LongSTanding Recovery from My Divorce That Yes, Happened 2 Years Ago But Still Hits Sometimes and is one you, dear Reader all 2 of you should listen to for the fucking out-of-this-world, actually-unreal vocal performance by November Ultra that really hammers home these actually-unreal lyrics:

Un amor como el primero [A love like the first] Pero que dure hasta el final [But lasts until the end] Mi alma es tuya, bájala de la cruz [My soul is yours, take it down from the cross] Si yo soy luna, tú eres el sol que me da luz [If I am the moon, you are the son that gives me light]

Ídolo - Adrian Quesada with Angélica Garcia

Another contender for a closing credits song and- y'know all these closing credits songs are so good, maybe I should just settle on this being a miniseries and not just a movie. We'll see what Netflix execs have to say on the matter when I inevitably write this script and clearly shop it to all the big streaming platforms and tv networks and everyone is fighting each other, full Spy vs Spy, to produce this award-win- er okay, maybe I'm getting ahead of myself, here. There's something about the organ that makes this feel period-appropriate, despite it being a modern song, and I can just see all the pickup shots of San Diego and Tijuana, before it cuts to Dina and Barrón driving in some classic car, top down bc it's a convertible obvio, and quite litrally riding off into the desert-framed sunset. I mean,

En mis horas turbulentas solo oigo tu voz [In troubled hours I only hear your voice] Embrujada con potencia que hemos probado los dos [Bewitched with power we have both shared] Sombra tan bella [Shadow so beautiful] Que cobra mi voluntad pa' conocerlo [It steals my will not to know you] Ídolo, mi ídolo [Idol, my idol] Me robaste la cordura [You rob me of my sanity]

1994 - United Freedom Collective ft. Jordan Stephens

In order to fend off the doubling over in pain that I always do when I think about what this song means to Dinarrón for any length of time, I'll just say, this is how Matty feels thinking about Barrón, and how Barrón feels about Bugsy and none of it works out the way they want it to

When I look at my little brother, I feel an awful urge to smother him I wanna bubble wrap his organs Stick styrofoam in his pity Funnel sunlight into his solar plexus Turn every fall into a ball pit But I know that one day that little scooter's gonna turn into desire And much like what I just witnessed, he'll be unable to break He'll break and I'll have to watch salt crystallize on his cheeks knowing it'll have more value than any cushion I've sown myself I dream of a version of him in the future Tumbling around rock bottom, stranded there in the deep Maroons and wounds he can't touch A bruise has got its own life Every wound is in arrears It hurts and it hurts, then it disappears

Corderio De Nanã - Os Tincoãs & Sukiyaki - Kyu Sakamoto

Bc this Russian novel/Movie/Show In My Head is actually more of a Barrón biopic since I've hijacked him and essentially acted like the man's my OC instead of someone who was on the show skskjsk and in this Barrón biopic, there's a part where he lives in Hawaii briefly bc his Garbage!Father is in the navy and gets stationed there for a little while. And despite the fact that Kyu Sakamoto is Japanese and Os Tincoãs is Brazilian and not remotely Pacific Islander in any way, let alone Hawaiian one or both of these are 1000% going to be playing over a montage of Matteo, Barrón, and Bugsy riding their bikes on the beach and just generally adventuring around the island, as three brothers should. It's pre-gang initiation for Matteo, so it's them at their purest, most undiluted little kid selves Barrón looks back on this time so fondly he actually refuses to think about it bc the nostalgia is physically painful. Also, both songs are pretty cheerful and breezy sounding but can't speak to the lyrics bc the first I'm p sure is in Portuguese and the second is in Japanese so they could be all doom and gloom and I just have no idea ksksks

Cerca De Ti - Hermanos Gutiérrez

Once again, I'll refrain from going full Charlie Kelly/Pepe Silva on everyone here, but what I can say is just.... just picture, Dina and Barrón, at the beach, at night, they decide to go swimming naked in the ocean under the light of the full moon. I'll let you fill in the rest sdlkfjskd

Sage Motel - Monophonics ft. Kelly Finnigan

The final (I think?) contender for the closing credits song. Tbh this song just oozes sexy in a throwback way, in the same vein as like a Smokey Robinson or a Sam Cooke, and would be right at home in a Scorsese movie, which makes it more than qualified to feature in the end credits of the Movie-In-My-Head that will probnever happen lbr, like I'll be lucky if I even post 1/3 of what I've written skdjksjd

Over-the-Ocean Call - Lizzy McAlpine

Go ahead and throw this one on and imagine Dina calling Barrón while he's doing this paramilitary cry-fest training in the desert pretending he's not sobbing into his cheerios every morning Dina doesn't exist, and she needs to, idk, talk about some wedding details or something, maybe coordinate where he's gonna be during the ceremony and whatnot bc he's head security so poor mf's like contractually obligated to be there skskksjdkj and this sentiment is exactly where Dina's at. Throw this shit on and think about that not-at-all angsty scenario bc that's what @narcolini did before sending it to me, for me to turn around immediately and do the exact same thing. I mean, c'mon.

And you hate the things I do and sometimes you hate me But I think my mind is far away, sorta strange, this is But I think I'll call you anyway Call collect 'Cause baby this is, an over-the-ocean call And I thought I could make it short But my brain's all outta sorts, I can't hide it I'm staring at the my wall and I thought that I wouldn't cry But breaking your heart breaks mine I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine I'll call from over the ocean This time, this time, this time I'll break your heart through the phone With an over-the-ocean call Is how I told him, this isn't working anymore

You Make Your Own Heaven And Hell - The Temptations

Now, I have quite a few end credits songs, but this is the only opening credits song bc the little scenelet in my head with this song is just so perfect, idk if I could find a better way to start. It'd be similar to that asslong shot at the beginning of Jackie Brown that's literally just Jackie (played by the iconic Pam Grier and honestly, even if you don't like Tarantino, you should watch Jackie Brown for Madame Grier alone bc she's incredible) on the little conveyer belt in the airport (she's a flight attendant) trying to make it to her next flight. I think I'd do something like that with a few pickup shots right before of Logan Heights and San Diego, to introduce the neighborhood, like where B grew up. Not only is the song perfect vibes-wise, but the lyrics are so perfectly aligned to what I've essentially sksks decided are Barrón's beliefs about making money and what it takes to get by and be successful in America (and later, Mexico, ofc) and his general philosophy on being a criminalsksk

Time passes and your values change Life becomes a strange, confusing game Suddenly, you want the finer things in life But you find it takes lots of hard work and sacrifice Now you're standing at the crossroads of life To satisfy your personal wants, will you do wrong or will you do right? Life is a giant, invisible scale with two sides: good and bad You and your beliefs are the weights The things you do each day determine the balance Your conscience is a flawless judge and jury, and the only question is what do you want? I'm tellin' you the natural facts, for what it's worth You make your own heaven and hell, right here on Earth

we've been loving in silence - MARO

So, if we were to continue the Stealing-Away-Into-the-Night scenario that I proposed above for Kali Uchi's No Hay Ley, and fast forward to Barrón and Dina in some random roadside, pay-by-the-hour motel room waking up next to each other. Dawn's barely broken, Dina's laying on her stomach, and Barrón's on his side, facing her, tracing the liines of her shoulder blades with his fingertips ......, and I'm dying, and I'm dead, and I'm typing this from beyondthe grave rn, I actaully cannot continue to soldier on, so I'll just leave you with that and this:

Oh, we've been here for a while Haven't seen the sun come out Oh, we've been loving in silence, drawing with our bodies Oh, I feel like running again, yeah, I feel like running again Oh, I wanna do it again, yeah, I wanna do it again Every crooked line in your back feels like part of me Your story's in my fingers, you'll never wash away Oh, we've found some secret smiles Haven't heard the rain come down Oh, we've been loving in silence, talking with our bodies

═

taglist: @narcosfandomdiscord @narcolini @ashlingnarcos @drabbles-mc @artemiseamoon

[dmwrites]

“Dude, you really need a front door.”

Impulse jumped and yelped a little too high pitched for a burly dwarf, turning around to find Doc standing behind him.

“Doc! Hi! Yeah, it’s a work in progress, you know how it goes.” Impulse chuckled and ran a hand ruefully over his beard, mentally scolding himself for not building a door. Now Doc was going to think he was less cool and put together!

“If you’re not careful, any ol’ mob could come right in.” Doc smiled, leered almost, then dropped the dramatics after a second and sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. “Impulse, I need a favor from you, and I hate to ask but I must.”

“What is it?” Impulse asked. He and Doc ran in similar circles- well, only in that they both used redstone. Impulse wasn’t, like, intimidated by Doc… not at all. They were colleagues, friends. Totally. This was a causal conversation.

“Can I be your roommate for a few weeks?”

Now that wasn’t exactly what Impulse had been expecting. “What?” He looked up at the creeper man in confusion.

“I’ve been super angry at my projects this past week, and I need someone who can handle me if I explode.” Doc explained. “I don’t want to explode, but if I do, or try to, I need someone strong to stop me.”

Impulse grinned. “So you think I’m strong?” He wiggled in a self-congratulatory kind of way, super casually flexing.

Doc snorted. “You’re a demon, and you’re currently cosplaying a dwarf who has mined out the inside of this mountain- I've seen you carrying boulders like its nothing. You’re a tank, my friend.”

Impulse knew Doc was laying on the flattery hard, but it was working, so it was acceptable. “Yes, of course you can stay here for a bit. Let me make you up a little Doc corner for you to sleep in.”

“Did someone say interior decoration?” Gem fell through a hole she had mined in the ceiling, crashing to the ground, but scrambling to her feet at once. “Well howdy Doc! It’s been a bit!” Gem took Doc’s hand from his lap and shook it vigorously. “Dang! That’s crazy, how long has it been… probs since you and Ren kept interrupting my peace and quiet with your obnoxious redstone menaces last season!” She was squeezing his hand quite tightly.

“As we can all tell, she doesn’t hold a grudge against you or anything.” Pearl appeared out of the kitchen of the dwarven keep, eating tinfoil and chips. “Also Impulse, you’re out of chips. And tinfoil. No idea why.”

“What- why are you two in my house! How did you get in? When did you get in?” Impulse sputtered.

“No front door.” Doc reminded him, pulling his definitely not throbbing hand away from Gem’s.

“Listen, if Doc is staying with you, he’ll need a cute little room. Me and Pearl are experts at decoration- let us handle making him a room! Please!!!” Gem begged.

“As long as Doc’s okay with it, sure.” Impulse chuckled, raising an eyebrow at Pearl, who was starting to inch away from Gem- clearly this was the first time she was hearing that she would be helping to decorate Doc’s room.

“Go for it- I wanna see what the best builders on the server can do.” Doc said with a smile.

“Fantastic!” Gem grabbed Pearl around the wrist. “Let’s go, Pearl!” She skipped away. “Oh, and Doc? Flattery will not work on us, redstone boy.”

Doc and Impulse watched them go off to an unfinished part of Impulse’s keep and start laying down shulkers.

“See, you have nice neighbors. I just have Scar, who has decided that every moment not trying to ‘hot guy’ me is a moment wasted.” Doc sighed and folded his arms.

“Oh yes, they’re lovely. A few quirks, but I’m sure they’ll treat you well.” Impulse chuckled.

“Quirks?”

——

Doc found out what those quirks were rather quickly. Impulse had bade him a good night at sunset promptly, saying something about sticking to a schedule, and left Doc in his newly constructed “Doc Room”, which consisted of a red bed, walls with redstone splattered on it, and a stuffed creeper on the bed. Doc was laying there, holding the creeper and trying to sleep. It was hours earlier then he’d usually crash, but he wanted to respect Impulse’s house rules, as he was a guest.

He’d had his eyes closed for a while, but gave up finally and opened them again. He clapped his hand over his mouth to stop from screaming at the sight of Pearl standing over him, eyes wide and all-knowing.

“Pearl?” Doc whispered. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“Watching you sleep. Clearly.” Pearl said nonchalantly, like this was a normal thing to do.

“You can’t just watch people sleep!” Doc sat up, still whispering, but indignant. “It’s weird!”

“No, it’s literally not.” Pearl said, then failing to elaborate on that. “Anyway, you’re not asleep. I don’t sleep. Gem is on her fifth coffee of the night. Do you wanna come haunt Joe Hills with us? We just kind of stand behind trees and walls and recite poems incorrectly at him. It’s not for any kind of revenge or anything, we’re just assholes.”

“I- yes, I guess?” Doc got to his feet and put on his crocs. This was one way to forget about the redstone, he supposed.

[kieraelieson]

In which Virgil has taken lessons on how to demand affection: Part Five, Logan.

Virgil Roman Patton Remus Janus

Logan had been aware of the ‘Demanding Affection Lessons’. Patton had consulted him before even suggesting them to Virgil, and Logan had agreed that they might be useful. Though to be honest, he’d thought at the time that the ultimate result of the lessons would be a closer relationship between Virgil and Patton, and perhaps Virgil would become more vocal about his needs and wants.

He hadn’t expected the nervous request that day in the kitchen. It had caught him off guard, and he’d asked Virgil to repeat himself, even though he had heard it the first time. He could hardly believe Virgil was requesting affection from him, and though he did indeed feel affectionately towards Virgil, his attempt to fulfill the request had been, even in his own eyes, paltry.

But even more he hadn’t expected the way that Virgil’s requests for affection would spread amongst the other sides. Roman, Patton, even Remus had come up to ask for affection.

As he always did when confronted with something he hadn’t anticipated, he began collecting data. Even before Remus, but especially now that he had joined, Logan could confirm that the effect of the requests for affection was nothing but positive. General moods had improved, relationships between them all had been significantly strengthened, collaborative efforts to tackle problems had increased massively, and perhaps most important, Thomas was happier.

It was a logical move for Logan to also request affection from the other sides. The benefits were clear.

However.

He did not want to subject himself to five hugs. And that would also likely not have the same benefits. He would need to ask for things he wanted. He was just concerned that if he did so, he would be rejected. His requests would take more time than a simple hug. The other sides were busy themselves, and didn’t want to take time out of their days to do him favors.

But he could see from his data the benefits that were possible. The possible improvements to Thomas’s life. Even the potential improvements to his own. How could he squander all of that by not asking?

— — —

Patton was the safest first option. Not only because he was most likely to say yes, but also because he frequently cooked.

“Patton?” Logan said, beginning to understand more Virgil’s hesitance in asking.

“Yeah?” Patton said, looking up from his craft with a smile.

Logan held out a paper on which he’d listed approximate measurements and times. “I… would like to request… for you to make me a toast with Crofters. To me i-it would be affection.” Despite his previous rehearsing in the mirror, he still didn’t manage to make it through the request without stumbling.

Patton looked at the paper curiously. “Oh. Oh, I get it! Of course I will, Lo!”

Relief swept over him more powerfully than Logan had anticipated, and he needed to sit down. “Thank you, Patton.”

Patton gave him one of those soft looks, like he did when he wanted to hug someone, but he didn’t hug Logan, just stood up, looking again at the paper. “I’ll be right back!”

That toast Patton returned with seemed like the best one Logan had ever eaten.

— — —

With a grown confidence, Logan knocked on Roman’s door.

“Come in!”

Logan entered and held out a paper to Roman. “I have a request.”

Roman frowned at the paper a minute. “Chores?”

“Not exactly,” Logan said, knowing he’d tailored this request exactly to Roman. He pulled out his flash card to be sure of the correct term. “Those are indeed chores that need doing, but my request if for you to ‘gamify’ them. It would be as a favor to me, as… as affection.”

Roman’s head cocked to the side, and he silently mouthed ‘affection?’. Similarly to Patton, the meaning seemed to hit him all at once. “Oh! Oh, well yeah. I can definitely do that. I can’t promise that my games will work, Thomas might still leave the things undone, but I can definitely make games for the chores.”

Logan smiled, something fizzy feeling welling up in his chest. “Thank you, Roman.”

Roman grinned. “Anytime, Specs.”

— — —

With Virgil, he could text. It was relieving, not to have to ask in person.

Logan: I have a favor to ask

Virgil: ?

Logan: Have you heard the term ‘body doubling’?

Virgil: yeah, I’ve come across it once or twice

Logan: Would you be willing to come into my room and engage in your own activities while I do my work? It would be received as a form of affection.

Virgil: pfft, you all are such copycats. But yeah, totally, I’ll be over in a minute.

Sure enough, there was a soft knock at the door a few minutes later, and Virgil came in with two cups of tea. “Pat said we need to be hydrated.”

Logan smiled and nodded.

Virgil set one of the cups on Logan’s desk, and then slid down the wall with his own just beyond the desk, setting the cup on the floor next to him and pulling out his phone.

Despite Virgil being the embodiment of anxiety, it felt like a peace settled over the room.

Logan: Thank you.

Virgil: no prob 💜

— — —

Remus would be… interesting to ask. But Logan wanted to ask him before he asked Janus. For one reason, if things went poorly, he had one side left with whom he expected them to go well. For another, Remus was easier to find. Janus’s job required a lot of hiding away and working in the deeper parts of Thomas’s mind, and while he could often be found in his room, it was by no means a guarantee.

Almost the moment he walked into the downstairs living room he heard a snort.

“What, Mr. No-Feelings came for hugs too?”

“No actually, I have a request for a different type of affection.”

Remus popped up from behind the couch, streaked with a… substance. “Oh?”

“There are a few subjects in which I am interested, apart from my role as Thomas’s Logic and Curiosity. I wanted to ask if you would be willing to help mold the imagination in such a way that I can pursue those interests.”

Remus shrugged. “I mean, I probably won’t make it exactly accurate, but I’m game for helping you out. Why’d you ask me though? Why not Goody-Two-Shoes upstairs?”

Logan smiled slightly. “I believe some of the subjects would be of interest to you as well.” He held out a paper to Remus.

Remus’s expression went from curious, to intrigued, to nearly gleeful. “Oh hell yeah! Come on, Nerdy Wolverine! We’re doing this Now!”

— — —

It was his third attempt. Logan knocked on the door to Janus’s room.

Rather than saying ‘come in’, Janus opened the door, looking rather haggard.

Logan blinked. If he’d intended to ask anything else, he would have immediately regretted his request.

“Yes?” Janus said, leaning against the doorframe.

“I had come to ask… You are well known to be skilled at self-care, I had wanted to join you. It would be received as affection, and, perhaps it might be good for you at the moment as well.”

Janus gave him a half-hearted glare. “I’m fine.” His face smoothed out. “But yes, that would be nice.”

Logan helped set up, glad for the both of them to be able to relax in a hot bath and have a few hours of rest and pampering.

“If you ever want,” Logan offered. “I would be open to returning favors and affection.”

Janus just hummed noncommittally. “I appreciate the offer.”

— — —

He was going to have to be blunt. And clear.

He rose up in the bedroom. “Thomas, I have something to ask you.”

Thomas startled. “Ah! Logan! Geez, you could give me a little warning.”

“Apologies,” Logan said, feeling slightly deflated. “But I do have something to ask.”

“Yeah, of course,” Thomas said, pushing himself up to a sitting position. “What’s up?”

Logan offered a paper to Thomas. “I am continuing the requests for affection, however affection towards me would look different than it would towards others sides. I would greatly appreciate it if you would choose one of these healthy habits and commit to pursuing it, put it on a schedule and act on it regularly.”

Thomas studied the list.

“Additionally, Roman has created games associated with each of these, to make it easier to remember and complete.”

“Wow, Logan, this is really well thought out,” Thomas said, still looking at the paper. “I mean, I’d definitely need your help to stick with it, but sure, I’ll pick one of these.”

A broad smile invaded Logan’s face. “Of course I will be helping.”

[owaowabetch]

Minecraft Part 2 (Sykkuno x F!Reader)

Oneshot (maybe part of a series??? at this point probs): Chaos in the server, Will a deal entice you to become part of the comfy cartel? Or will you resist the temptation of the deal and side with the resistance? Friendship and a lil romance (oohhh things are starting to heat up)

Warning:Non beta (cuz we baddies purr); part of Uh-oh & Impasta

You had been streaming Minecraft for about 4 hours when you decided to end it for a small meal break. Though ending stream didn’t stop you from continuing playing with your friends. Unfortunately, Sykkuno had not been on while you were streaming, since you did so quite earlier than usual, but you wanted to remodel your minecraft home; turning the once pink wooden home to a white quartz block using the obscene amount of quartz that Jae gifted you as to entice you to join his faction in the sever. It was a nice bribe gift, but you have yet to align yourself with the ressistance or the comfy cartel. 

So, while gettin gifted quartz blocks was nice, hearing that Toast gave Lily a gun enticed you more.But you doubt Toast’s whole character arc will entrust you with one. You maybe be living with his ‘right-hand’ man, but he seems to be slowly on a downward spiral. Kind of like a crazy wacky scientist- he’s doofenshmirtz. 

Anyways you had completed the finishing touches on your remodeled, when you saw in the little chat that Sykkuno was on. “ OH!OH!OH! SYKKUNO!”

You were excited to show him the newly made house. The house was three levels to your house, but you’re mostly wanna show him the basement area.

You saw the iconic teal shirt paired with the green stripped scarf boxy figure making their way towards you. You emoted the cheering pose and happily called out to him “Hi Sykkuno!” 

“Hey, Y/n!” He cheered back coming closer “I have something for you!” 

You start jumping up and down “Present!” You like getting free things, especially if it comes from someone you like....as a friend of course. Yup yup, just as a friend. As, he stood in front of you he laughed “What are you doing?” watching your character wave their arms around

You laughed back at him “Just happy to see you!”

“Well, I’m always happy to see you!” Sykkuno chirps out and adds on with a slight stutter “C-cause we’re friends! I’m always happy to see such a great friend!”

Feeling the high of him telling you how he was always happy to see you was crushed by him reminding you that friends is all that you both may only ever be. So with the disappointment lingering and the excitement wearing off, you just mutter a reply back. “Yes! The bestest of friends!”

“Yup, yup. Anyways have some water mills” He throws some black blocks with blue markings on them “Follow me!” You both ran near your home “Claim this bit of land” and you did so. “Now, dig like a 3 by 6 hole and place two water mills close to each corner and one in the middle bottom”(1). You followed his instructions “Ok, so im just gunna place the water” You watched him do so “Ok! I think it’s all good and ready to go!”

You crouch and inch around the hole “What is it?”

“Ok well you know how I got you that green lasso that has you swinging and jumping all over the place with the slime boots?” Sykkuno asks crounching up right beside you 

“Yea yea!” You crouch and uncrouch in circles around him

“Well I have something even better!” He cheers “Eh” he grunts and throws a ring on the floor. You awe and oh as you put the ring in your hot bar “How cute! It has little wings on it!” 

“Yea! It’s a special ring” Sykkuno tells you 

“Special ring?...Are you proposing to me! OMG Sykkuno” You joke 

“Wah?” Spluttering out in confusion but deciding to play along “I mean are you accepting?”

You laugh “Woah, Sy! How bold of you sir”

He giggles back to you before teaching you how and where to put the ring. “OK do you have it on?”

You jump up and down in response allowing the slime boots to spring you up higher. “Yup Yup”

“Ok so, why don’t you take off your slime boots and then press the space bar” He jumps up and down, which you do. You gasp as you are lifted into the air “Sy! Look! Im flying!!” He is in the air next to you “I can see! Cause I am also flying!”

“How are we doing this! This is so fucking cool!” You laugh as you start moving around in the air “WAIT! Are you streaming? I’m so sorry!”

He laughs as he starts following you around in the air “It’s fine, but the ring I gave you is an angel ring. As long as your wearing it, then you can just fly around”

“Wow! Thanks Sykkuno!” You cheer and you walk around in the air “Clean! Clean!” 

“Yea, Of Course! It’ll be alot easier for you to get to places faster” He explains once more “Now, my chat has been going crazy and telling me that you redid our house?”

Excitement lit through you as you were ready to show him the remodeling works that you’ve done “Yes! I did! I’m so excited to show you” You move your camera out of first person and notice your character wearing a pair of white wings on your back “Oh my god! Sykkuno! I didn’t know that there was actual wings that appear on your lil person!”

“uh yea! I didn’t know if you wanted to have or not, cause mine are invisible” Sykkuno says flying next to you as you make the short distance back to your home “but i remembered you saying that you wanted to buy fairy wings. I could’ve made them pink to look like them, but i thought the white ones would suit you better”

“Cause i’m such an angel?” You tease as you reached your front door

“Well uh you are um a nice person” Hearing the shyness in his tone made you think that he was being sincere and it made you blush “Thank you Sykkuno, you’re one of the best people i know!”

He clears his throat “uh well um, look we made it!” trying to divert the conversation away from the compliments. You made a mental note to yourself to compliment him more, so that his confidence rises up and he no longer shies away from them.

“Yup!” You open the door “come on in!” He oh’ed as he came in, seeing the kitchen area first “As you can see Sy and chat, I have created a kitchen with actual fucking oven and fridge! How crazy is that! These mods are cool!”

“So, yeah! Kitchen area, though I doubt we’ll use it” You comment

“Wow! a fridge! Neat!” He opened the fridge and looked at the decor of other kitchen appliances 

You laugh at his wording “ Yup! and this is our living room slash library” leading him further into the house and showing him the sitting area with a bunch of bookcases surrounding the fake chairs “and right next to this is the ‘dining room’ where more seats were placed with a table and a cute flower in a pot atop the table. “So, yea this is the first floor!” 

“This is cool! Oh! it’s [y/f/flower] on the table” He notes and you nod feeling your cheeks flush a bit before admitting “of course! It’s actually the flower you gave me on our first day...”

“thats, thats really cool that you kept it” Sykkuno replies and there is a bit of silence between the two of you. Not awkward but almost in a content kind of way. Peaceful if you will. 

“Ok! Now lets head upstairs! It’s where we sleep!” You say walking up the stairs showing him the green beds placed next to each other “I didn’t know if you wanted to sleep next to each other again, but i did it anyways lol” 

He walked around the room and admired the little decor spread around the walls and opened chests in the room. He laughed awkwardly “it’s fine, it’s just a respawn point so its no biggie!”

“Yea to sleepovers!” You cheer 

Clearing his throat he noted how much he liked the room, causing you to smile and thank him “But i know what you’ve been wanting to see the most!”

“What do you mean?” He questioned and looked at you 

“The basement! Dun Dun DUN!” You jump at him scooting him down the stairs

He laughed in disbelief “What was that? Did you just hit me?”

“Nope” Emphasizing the p “ I just jumped at you which caused you to go down the stairs! I could never hurt you Sy!”

“Well I could never hurt you too” He mutters back and you pouted at how cute his response was

“Oh! You could just make your way down there! I forgot that Jae wanted me to give him some quartz back!” You gasp remembering what Jae had told you

“What do you mean?” His character looks back at you

And you look back at his and think “hmmm I don’t know if I should snitch or not, but Jae gave me an obsence amount of quartz blocks to build the house! I knew it was a little hard for you to get some, so he offered to give me some”

He hummed back “I see....” 

You noted how the atmosphere tensed for a split moment until Sykkuno happily noted that it was nice of him to give you something he couldn’t, but it sounded a bit off to you. Though you didn’t pay much attention to that since you didn’t want to reveal the resistance, as you have yet to align yourself with any of the two factions, well soon to be three since you believe that Sydney is doing some witchy stuff.

“Well, why don’t you go do that while I check the basement and give something to toast really quick!” He tells you 

“Ok!” You reply back to him rifling through your chests to find the remaining the blocks to give to Jae “I’ll see you in a bit, maybe toast too!”

With that you made your way back to Jae to hand him the quartz back, though it was quite an ordeal since he made a whole rant on how evil the comfy cartel were and how you should join them and become a spy cause apparently Toast is planning on doing something that could affect the entire server....

So you just ignored all of that and made your way back home, to have Toast and Sykkuno greet you at the front door.

“Hey guys! Im back” You cheer at them

“What did Jae want huh?!?!” Toast immediately questions you “Did you tell him any of our business huh? Should we be trusting you huh? huh? HUH!?!”

“Whoa Toast” You back up as he was getting all up in your face

“Wow Toast, are you okay?” Sykkuno places himself between you two 

“Im doing just fine” Toast answers back and you notice his full gear armor “Just wanted to know if we have a rat here”

You tsk “wow Toast, I see how it is. I see. By the way you look like a Power Rangers villan, just sayin”

He takes out his gun and points it at you “Well you won’t be sayin much Motherfucka!”

“I won’t say anything at all if you give me a gun to join the comfy cartel” You hit Sykkuno away and hear him utter an ow “Cause I don’t have an allegiance with anyone at the moment. So I’m a free agent and I can talk to whoever whenever” Throwing his words back at him and implying that you can speak to anyone without repercussions.

“AH right you are not part of the comfy cartel yet” He nods to himself “Well I wont give you a gun to join the group cause frankly I know that you’ll just shoot me”

You sigh “Then i’-”

“Instead!” He interrupts you “I’ll give you something better!” 

You pout “but i wanna cap a bitch”

“Instead of cappin’ you’ll be rackin’ cause you’re gunna have to collect taxes from people and in exchange you get the left hand of my right hand” He moves closer to you, that statement throw you through a loop ‘left hand?right hand?’. You were confusion. “Capiche?”

“What do you mean?” You question and he evil laughs and hits sykkuno.

“Wha? What was that Toast” Sykkuno also confused as to why Toast hit him and what Toast meant.

“I’m saying that you can have Sykkuno!” He evil laughs once more 

Sykkuno splutters “Wha? What do you mean Toast?!?!”

You were shocked at what he said. Giving you Sykkuno? “What do you mean?”

“You can marry Sykkuno” He repeats himself once more “You are both important to each other, why else live together? This way I’m keeping you both in check” and once again with the evil laughter

‘I’m glad im not streaming otherwise some of the more entitled fangirls would 100% send hate comments to me’ you think to yourself

You hum “Will I still get a gun?”

“Only if you can become my number one marksmen and execute the people I tell you too” He offers you

“Deal” You nod to yourself 

“Wha? [Y/N]?” Sykkuno sputters out “You’re ok with this?” and nodding to yourself you reply with a yes and asks him if he is also “Well I- uh I” he continues to laugh awkwardly “I mean uh sure?”

“Neat!” You reply throwing a diamond at him “Here’s your dowry lol”

Though before another conversation could happen Toast butts in once more “This was a test and you both passed” and throws a gun at you “Here take this one, prove yourself and I’ll get you a better one”

You put the gun in your hot bar and place it in your hand. “Clean!” You start point it in different directions “Thanks! Toast!”

“Don’t betray me or else you gets the hose!” He starts walking backwards then comes back up to you “Oh, also your target is Leslie, be sure to collect her taxes before killing her.” Walking backwards once more before coming back “Oh Sykkuno hand me the diamond [y/n] gave you.” He does so “Ok that’ll be your last tax payment until I have you look for materials for a special project” He evil laughs as he flies away

“OK! Great talk!” You call out and emote the happy one, with your arms lifted up and shaking about “Awesome! I get a gun muahahahaha!”

You hear Sykkuno clear his throat “so uh, you were ok with marrying me?”

“Yea! so were you!” You say as you move you camera around trying to find a good angle to see it properly

“Because you were!” He replies back and that took you aback a bit as you didn’t realize how uncomfortable it may have been for him.

“Well you didn’t have too if you didn’t want to” You felt a bit embarrassed at the fact that he did it because you wanted to but not he himself personally

“Wha, well I didn’t think you were being serious” Once again laughing awkwardly “Cause you know girls aren’t in- OW”

You shot him with the gun in annoyance.

‘Bitches are into you Sykkuno’ You screamed in your head ‘I‘M BITCHES!’

 Author’s Note:

Side Note 1 - I dont know if this is correct lol

No cap but i had written half of this like 3 days after writing Part 1 but I got lazy lmao sorry! Also this is gunna be a slowburn story cuz lets be real our smol bean and all of our asses are awkward as hell and kind insecure in the romantic aspect, so realistically it would not be fast paced.

So here it is Minecraft pt.2/4

Tags: @sushiims

[irelanddesires]

Ny Början- Chapter 1

Pairing:  André Burakovsky x reader

Warnings: Fluff, eventual smut, hockey violence, domestic violence (in the beginning), idk probs more.

Summary:  With the help of a group of unsuspecting heroes you are saved from a toxic relationship. One of your saviors goes above and beyond anything you could ask for. A friendship is forged and after awhile feelings happen. Could ths be your happy ending? 

A/N: Hi I’m trash and this idea has rolled around in my head for w e e k s. I’ve played hockey for a really long time and the Avs are my team... Burky happens to be my hockey crush so I figured I would share this. IDK what it is but this challenged me a lot and I can’t write a guys perspective to save my life ffs. Dialogue is hard my doods. Anyway, enjoy and let me know what you think! 

Going to the club was the last thing you wanted to do. Between working two jobs and trying to stay on top of your classes it didn’t leave much free time and you didn’t want to spend that sparse time dealing with drunk people and loud music. Your boyfriend, Matthew, had insisted that this was exactly what you needed after the week you had. At this point you both had been there long enough to see friends call it a night and you were pretty sure that Matthew was one drink away from making a fool out of himself. 

“Matt, can we please go?” you asked, hoping that he would finally agree. 

“Loosen up! We never get to spend time together. Let’s enjoy this!” he practically yelled. 

“We’ve been here long enough. It’s late and I have an early shift tomorrow.” you urged. At this point you wanted to go home, get out of this dress and crawl into bed. Nothing at this bar held your attention. Matt’s had grabbed your arm, his face inches from yours.

“I said no. We’re not going anywhere. I’m not finished here.” he ground out. 

The look on his face left little room for argument and was quite scary. Matt was usually a nice guy, the perfect boyfriend, but after drinking he could become a totally different person. Matt had never hit you but the emotional toll it took on you could be just as painful as a physical blow. After the week you’ve had of working 12-14 hour days just to come home and clean before passing out just to do it all over again made you throw all caution to the wind. You wanted to go home for fucks sake, not be here. 

You snached your arm from his grip, looking him in the eyes, “I’m tired, I’m going home. You can stay if you want but I’m not.” 

Before he could say anything you spun on your heels and marched out the side door that led to a less busy street. You hoped this would give you some peace and quiet as you ordered your Uber. Just as you tapped the app to get an Uber the door behind you swung open. Matt stumbled through the doorway and onto the sidewalk with you. 

“You can’t leave me,” he said. 

“Matt, I’m going home to sleep. I don’t care what you do.” 

“I said no!” he roared. Before you could comprehend what was happening your head snapped back and you were pushed against the outside wall of the bar. The brick dug into your skin as you tried to struggle against the hands holding you there. 

“Why don’t you ever listen to me you bitch.” he said as his fingers dug into your throat, “If I tell you to do something you fucking do it!” 

Panic seized your chest as his hands circled around your throat. The throbbing in your head forgotten about as your fight or flight instincts kicked in. You tried to kick him as hard as you could but it seemed like he wasn’t phased at all by it. Your hands grabbed onto his, your fingernails digging into his skin trying to get any distance between his hands and your throat. Just as spots began to dance around your vision the same door you both had exited from swung open and a group of people spilled out. 

Before you could try and scream for help one of them turned around and spotted you. His face went from relaxed and playful to murderous in seconds. You didn’t have time to gather your thoughts before he was charging both of you, shoving Matt off of you. You fell to the ground in a pile, your muscles felt like jello but your brain screamed at you to run. Looking up at the situation happening in front of you all you could see was the back of the stranger that had come to your rescue. His friends had caught on quick and made it over to stand around you too, like shields between you and Matt,  as you gathered yourself. 

“Is there a problem?” One of them said, the voice sounded like it came from the one that had charged Matt but your brain couldn’t comprehend everything that was happening. 

Matt stumbled to his feet before looking at the mystery men. “Mind your business” he slurred. 

“I don’t think so. You want to get to her, you have to go through us.” a voice called out. 

For a moment it looked like Matt was considering it. His eyes scanned each guy before landing on you. 

“This isn’t over you fucking bitch!” he yelled before turning around and making his way back into the bar. 

The door didn’t have time to shut all the way before one of your saviors crouched down in front of you. His hazel eyes searched your face, “ Are you okay?” he asked 

As much as you wanted to tell him your entire body felt weighed down, you bit back your weakness,

 “I’m fine.” you said as you began to try and stand. It took a couple tries to get your feet under you. You tried to use what energy you had to stand, you were nearly there when your legs went to give out. Hands caught you around your waist and pulled you the rest of the way up. 

“You don’t look fine” the mystery man said and he held onto you, carrying the majority of your weight. “Look, let me get you somewhere safe and I can take you home”

You looked at him, searching his face for dishonesty. At this point you figured that someone, or a group of people, that came to your rescue surely couldn’t be bad people. You silently agreed for his help with a nod of your head. 

The rest of the time you spent with the group of them went by in a blur. They all talked amongst themselves in whispers, every now and then you caught words. At one point you caught the name “André” and you assumed this was the name of the guy holding you up. Before long a car pulled to the curb and your stranger opened the door for you before helping you inside. None of the other guys followed so you assumed they were getting their own Uber. 

The ride was silent for a few moments before his voice broke through, “I’m André by the way” 

“Y/N” 

“I didn’t know where you would want to go so I figured you could come to my place and then decide what you want to do,” he said. 

You looked at him and nodded, whispering a “thank you” as you settled into the seat. You shouldn’t feel comfortable about going home with a guy you just met outside a bar but for some reason you felt safe with him. He gave off a genuine arua of concern and wanting to help. Before you could think about it too much your world faded to black and you let your exhausted and battered body rest. 

_______________________________

Having a night off from hockey was rare. What was even more rare was being able to have a guys night with some of the team. Most of the time when games weren’t being played or practice were being held, everyone would go their own ways. Some would spend time with their significant other, some would spend time alone or some would visit family if the break was long enough. 

Tonight a few of us had decided to let loose and bar hop across Denver. Usually this time of year the weather was starting to get cooler which made bar hopping more of a chore. Tonight however, the weather was perfect which gave us plenty of reason to have some fun. 

The first bar we went to was picked by Miko. He said this was the best bar in Denver with the hottest chicks so more than a few in our group were eager to get there. 

The outside of the building was modern with sleek black walls and the walls that weren’t stone were see-through glass. Through the windows we could see people dancing with lights strobing through the air.

 We quickly made our way inside and were ushered to a VIP section, one of the many perks of playing professional sports was getting recognized when out since it usually led to getting a more private area. The captain of the team was with us so of course we were bound to be recognized. 

We all bounced around from group to group chatting and drinking. Some of the guys had found partners to dance with while the rest of us just hung out. Time passed and we all were eventually some level of intoxicated, some more than others. Nate brought up the idea of heading to the Pur, a rooftop bar with a chill atmosphere. A group of us thought that was a great plan. The constant bass and flashing lights got old as the night wore on. 

The five of us; Gabe, Nate, Miko, Gru and myself headed toward the back door. We hoped we could escape quietly and back doors were usually best for doing that. 

The heavy door swung shut behind us as we spilled into the cool Denver night. A noise caught my attention, turning my head to see who else was out here, I was met with a scene I wasn’t expecting. A man had a woman pinned to the side of the building. Her feet dangled off of the ground and her hands gripped his that were circling around her throat. Time seemed to stop and instinct took over as I rushed to them. Before I could comprehend what I was doing my fist was sailing through the air, connecting with the man's face before he fell to the ground. The girl slumped to the side of the building in a heap. Concern for her swam through my body but I knew this guy had to leave before I could help her. 

The man stumbled to his feet. By now the guys had joined me, putting ourselves between the pair. 

“Is there a problem?” Gave asked

“Mind your business” the man mumbled. 

Rage burned through my body and it took everything in me to not pummel this guy. 

“I don’t think so.” I called out. 

The man took a moment. His eyes scanned each one of us. He must have eventually decided he was outnumbered and didn’t want to take his chances. 

“This isn’t over you fucking bitch!” He yelled before stumbling through the door we had just come out of. Relief flooded me now that we didn’t have a fight on our hands. A whimper from behind me had me turning and dropping to my knees. 

“Are you okay?” I asked. My eyes scanned over her checking for major injuries. Her breathing hitched as she tried to push herself up to stand. Halfway up her legs seemed to give way. Before she could tumble to the ground I grabbed her, hauling her to her feet and holding as much of her weight as I could. 

Her hands tangled in my shirt holding on for dear life. There’s no way she would be able to make it home and I didn’t trust leaving her like this with a stranger. Looking around the group of guys, Gabe was the first to speak up. 

“What’s your plan? Get an Uber?” He asked. 

“Yeah, I think I will take her to my place. I have a spare room she can sleep in and she can figure out something in the morning” 

The guys nodded in agreement. No one wanted to leave her alone right now. Especially not with her angry boyfriend, or ex boyfriend I hope, on the loose. 

“I’ll get you guys an Uber,” Gru piped up. 

“Thanks” I muttered, turning my attention back to the girl clinging on to me. 

The rest of the wait was quiet. No one talked about going anywhere else for the night. I’m sure at this point everyone wanted to go home and decompress from what had happened. Before long the Uber pulled up and I shuffled us around to open the door. With some adjustments I was able to sit her down and close the door before nodding to the guys and making my way around the car to climb in beside her. 

The driver took off immediately, glancing in the rear view mirror between the two of us. We didn’t make it far before i turned to her, 

“I’m André by the way” 

Her sad eyes met mine and for a moment I didn’t think she would say anything until I heard a whisper. 

“Y/N” 

Her voice sounded awful and the emotion behind her eyes told me how exhausted she really was. 

“I didn’t know where you would want to go so I figured you could come to my place and then decide what you want to do,” I told her. 

She looked at me again before croaking out a “thank you”. The rest of the ride was quiet. Once we arrived at my place I figured out why it was quite. At some point during the drive Y/N must had fallen asleep, her head was leaning against the window and her body was curled right around herself. 

I climbed out of the car and went to her side. Carefully I opened the door, catching her head when it went to fall. Surprisingly she didn’t wake so I slid my arms under her lifting her out of the car and pulling her against my chest. 

Unlocking the door and navigating through my apartment while carrying another person was harder than I would have imagined. I made it to my guest room and laid her on the bed. Not wanting her to wake up uncomfortable I took her shoes off before covering her with blankets and shutting the door on my way out. 

I settled on the couch with a beer from the fridge before releasing the breath that seemed stuck in my chest. The last thing I thought about before drifting off was the broken girl sleeping in the other room.

[roguestarsailor]

unpopular opinion: if rhys couldnt forgive the sisters for leaving feyre to defend herself he should be angriest at elain, not nesta. freye and nesta will tear themselves apart for her and elain just cries about not getting married and being part of the socialite scene. 

nesta pulled her weight all through ACOMAF and ACOWAR and at the end of ACOTAR. she was the only one who went after feyre even tho she doesnt understand anything other than to get her sister back (ugh can u imagine how fucken amazing the story would have been if nesta did get pass the wall?!?), she was the one who asked and listened to feyre and her story, asked her to teach her to paint (aka trying to connect with her, whereas elain never tried to learn/understand feyre and her story. elain was just nice to feyre), fought with the queens directly when they refused to give the book, she was the only one noticing the little things after freye changed into a fae, and then she was the only one who noticed why she drew stars on her dresser! she is protective of elain even as she herself went under and as soon as she got out of the cauldron, she actually came out of her room in the house of wind only when feyre came back from spring court (probs her way of trying to see if her sis is really ok w the IC, feel out who these ppl were, etc), spoke her truth at the meeting w the high lords even tho it was super hard for her, seek out her sister when she felt the wall go down, didn’t want to abandon feyre at the library (and the first thing she does when she sees cassian is to tell him to go to feyre and help her first!), she learned to aid and treat the wounded at the war camp, she literally tries so fucken hard to be there, to understand and to care.

what did fucken elain do? she was a seer and nobody bothered to help her learn things (this is the fault of feyre and IC but still she wasn’t curious about what she could do?) she got her moment when she stabbed the king but everything else? she literally just lets people coddle her. she just sits in her own world, says cryptic shit and thinks about gardening??? like she too was starving back then and her thoughts weren’t on figuring out how to help out?? she has never been described as protective, only agreeable. shes just nice to everyone and she gets a pass??

im actually frustrated by the fact that at no point was feyre mad at elain for being so indulgent. her character is all about being lovely and prob speaks to the theme of despite the hardships she can still find beauty in everything or shes the symbol of beauty that drives the character to protect. but literally every fucken character had to battle their hardships and traumas to protect their own sense of beauty in the world. feyre had to become a huntress to fight for the peace to paint. rhys loves velaris, so he sacrificed himself to amarantha, mor found her peace at the court of dreams but she still has to face her families and court of nightmares to ensure balance between the two, cas and az were nobodies and fought to be powerful Illyrians when everyone said they weren’t shit and to protect their peace they go to these camps, face the taunts and disgust and defend every single day. so ur saying elain just runs to her garden when shes feeling sad???

i cant believe the audacity of elain to down a drink before interacting with nesta at the solstice party! nesta fought for her and made sure elain was ok at every single point in the books and yet elain couldnt fucken handle her in ACOFAS??? nesta was going to sacrifice herself so feyre can get to the cauldron, saw her father die in front of her eyes, she saw cassian almost die and was prob pissed that she was the only defense between the king and cassian, she was on the front lines of the war, esp to help the wounded, and she was involved as much as possible prepping for the war effort! she was obviously dealing w so much shit and nobody gave a rats ass that she’s handling her trauma terribly. elain should have pulled her weight then. she should have been the one who fought for nesta to be ok.

anyways i dont like elain. nesta deserves so much better.

[cryptidofthekeys]

The Beginnings of Obsession

@tiny-yan-anon​ You said you’d like to be tagged in the Jek n Hyde story so there ya go, this was fun to write but gosh d a m n was it long as hell- Uh TWs would probs be for like Drugging, Violence (Someone gets beat with a cane to be specific), Blood is mentioned but there’s nothing graphically gory, Obsessive Behavior, and Yandere-Ish themes

You were out for a walk in the park, it was evening time so it was nice and cool outside, you didn’t have to worry so much about overheating at this stage of the day, it was nice and peaceful out as well… Nothing and nobody could bother you… You could relax on the bench and watch the sunset, you had hoped you weren’t too late to catch the view you always loved so dearly, you took your seat on the bench and sighed, you could see the sun perfectly from here, nothing obstructing it at all as it slowly began its descent, and then it was letting the moon have its turn up in the sky. You watched as the moon slowly began rising and sighed in bliss, this was so nice… It was so nice whenever you got the chance to come to the park, this place had always calmed your nerves. The moon was just as peaceful as the sun, granted, it was dangerous around these parts at night which is why you couldn’t stay for too long, after the moon ascended further you got up and quickly made your way out of the park, glancing off at it as you continued walking, the stars shone brightly in the sky, and not a cloud in sight tonight… And as you continued your walk you bumped into someone and fell backwards, you winced a little in pain before quickly apologizing, the person held a hand out and you could get a good look at him now.

He was a man around five foot seven, wearing a blue turtleneck underneath a white lab coat, blue pants and even shoes that matched his outfit, he also wore circle glasses as well, he had a well groomed beard and sideburns, his hair was dark brown with some gray on the sides and it was a bit of a messy curly undercut, aside from all that those eyes were the most striking thing about him, they were a baby blue color and his face held such a friendliness to it, he held his hand out to you “No no, it’s quite alright, here, let me help you up” You nodded and slowly reached out for the extended hand, he quickly tugged you up to your feet and helped you dust yourself off a bit “There we go… Are you alright? I hope I didn’t startle you!” His tone was very polite and you smiled albeit a bit awkwardly “Not really… I just, wasn’t paying attention to where I was going was all” The stranger nodded “Ah, I see… I do not want to lecture you but you should know, it can be awfully dangerous at night time here, you never know what kind of depraved individuals you’ll run into at these hours…” You nodded “Of course, I’ll keep that in mind…” The stranger smiled before he realized “Oh, where are my manners? I haven’t even introduced myself yet…! My name is Henry! Henry Jekyll” You took a moment before you then had a realization.

“Oh! You’re that Doctor I’ve heard so much about aren’t you?” Henry nodded, chuckling a little “My reputation exceeds me I suppose… Yes, I am the local Doctor everyone talks about so dearly” He looked a little embarrassed but nonetheless you smiled and extended your hand “My name is (Y/N), it’s nice to meet you Doctor Jekyll” The man laughed a little, accepting the handshake “Please, you may just call me Henry… Would you like me to escort you back home? After all, wandering these streets alone at night as I’ve said, can be quite dangerous, and it would be a shame if something bad happened” You shook your head “Oh no, I don’t want to trouble you or put you outta your way…” Jekyll only smiled “Nonsense, I can assure you… It’s quite alright, I wasn’t too busy for tonight anyways” You sighed but smiled nonetheless “If you insist, then I guess it’s alright…” Jekyll let go of your hand, realizing it was awkward that he was still holding onto it and then you and him were on your way, you told him your address so he could actually lead you back there.

“So, what were you doing out here anyways? Er, if you don’t mind me asking that is” Henry asked to which you quickly responded “I just… I really love watching the sunset when I get the chance, and seeing the moon and stars… It’s all a very pretty sight when you can find time of course…” Jekyll nodded “Hm, I do suppose the sunset can be quite charming… And there are no clouds obstructing the views tonight either, a perfect evening for a stroll, I rarely go out anymore, I suppose I have gotten all wrapped up in my work as of recently” You nodded “So, your a doctor, what is it you do exactly?” Jekyll cleared his throat before speaking “Well, I used to have an ongoing experiment but uh…” And then he sighed “I would rather not go into details of that old experiment... After all, it uh, it is in the past… I will say my field is mostly in scientific studies, alchemy to be more specific, I spend quite a lot of time in my lab back at my mansion, if you’re ever interesting in learning about such things then I would be more than happy to teach you” You nodded “I’ll keep that in mind” And there was a pause before he spoke up “What is it that you do exactly?” You shrugged “Eh, I just do little things here and there… Nothing much, just… Enough to keep food on the table and pay the bills I guess…” Jekyll nodded “I see…” And there was another pause, this one a bit longer than before.

“Well, er… I know we just met but if you ever need any help with any of that, then please, don’t be afraid to contact me, after all I do love helping others out in times of need” And then he pulled out a little card with his info and number on it, you took it but then shook your head “I appreciate that offer immensely, but, I’d never wanna trouble you like that…” Jekyll merely smiled “Oh but it isn’t any trouble at all, like I said, my job is to help the people around! And even if that means paying for their bills or buying them something to eat or drink then so be it” You smiled at that “...You’re very kind… Not a lot of folks, especially not the richer ones would offer something like that” Henry nodded and sighed “Oh believe me, I know how you feel on that matter… Even if I am rich, I have always refused to act so snobby and selfish, being selfish and snobby gets you nowhere in life…!” ...Well, maybe he lied a little on the selfish part … But they didn’t need to know such details, the two of you continued your conversation, getting to know each other before finally he had led you back to the address you told him “There we are…! I’m surprised we didn’t run into any sorts of hooligans… I suppose it’s our lucky night, huh?” You nodded “Yeah… Oh uh, thanks by the way… I appreciate you taking the time to walk me home”

Henry had a bright smile on his face “It wasn’t a problem!” The people around here really didn’t tell a single lie about Henry Jekyll, he was as friendly as could be, so sweet and polite as could be, especially to offer such things to a person he barely even knew, as you were heading inside you turned back to him for a moment “I uh, I’m sure I’ll see you around some time, yeah?” Henry then shrugged and adjusted his glasses a little “Perhaps! I DO spend most of my time in the lab but, if you ever want you are free to stop by my home! My address is on the card I gave you” And then you nodded and he waved goodbye to you as he headed back to his own home, you got inside and closed the door behind yourself, you looked down at the card in your hand and read it more properly now ...Maybe, maybe you would pay him a visit one day, for now though you wanted to get some sleep, you walked over and placed the card down on the counter and headed off to the bathroom to brush your teeth, as you were getting ready for bed.

You couldn’t help but keep thinking of the doctor, you were a bit curious about him you wouldn’t deny, and it seemed he was curious of you too given all he had said, offered, and asked.

                                          M e a n w h i l e. . .

Jekyll had returned to his home and sighed deeply, he greeted Poole first since he was standing right there, must’ve been waiting actually… As he began walking toward his lab he greeted the maids as he walked past, they offered him some tea or something to eat to which he refused, he wasn’t feeling too hungry or thirsty right now, besides, he had some things to think about as he made it to the door, he quickly shut it behind himself and locked it, he then walked over and sat down in his chair and ran his hands through his hair, the entire walk home he had only thought of the person he had met earlier, he had only thought of you the entire time… It was so strange, the moment he first saw you he started feeling… Something, he thought about it some more, and it seemed like… Love? There was no way! Love at first sight was only ever in those fantasy stories, he had never really believed in love at first sight, it wasn’t the way he was wired, sure if some believed in that, who was he to judge then? But for him to feel such a strange feeling so suddenly… He heard a voice laughing at him and of course, right on cue to be a bother… Jekyll sighed “What do you want, Hyde?” He sounded a little snappy but then again, who could blame him? He watched as the exact being he didn’t want to see manifested right in front of him.

Hyde gave him a smirk as he paraded around the other “Someone’s got a crush~!” He kept exclaiming, cackling as Jekyll blushed and tried to defend himself “I do not! There is no way I can have a crush on someone I just met! I don’t even believe in love at first sight!” Hyde only grinned, displaying those sharp unpleasant teeth, somehow, even after all the years Jekyll’s spent with him, that display still managed to unnerve him “Oh come on! It’s SO clear~! You looove them~ But tell me something, do you even know if they have a significant other? Do you even think they’d like you back? I mean, who’d ever wanna get with a pathetic weakling such as yourself?” Hyde seemed to take notice of Jekyll tensing, and that look in the other’s eyes… Now, Hyde has seen many expressions on the other’s face before but this one looked… Different, he couldn’t quite place his finger on it just yet but it piqued his curiosity nonetheless. “Ugh, why don’t you just disappear for a while, hm? Just leave me alone for once” He was avoiding those questions which Hyde quickly caught onto, he walked over and got uncomfortably close to Jekyll, studying his expression carefully “...Hmm… You wish for me to leave you be?” There was a pause before he grinned, even though he was just like a ghost practically, those teeth being this close unnerved Jekyll immensely more than before.

“Fine then, I shall leave you be ...For now~” And just like that Hyde vanished which surprised Jekyll entirely, there was no way the other just up and left like that… It was up to something, he was planning something and Jekyll didn’t like that one bit, he knew asking would be pointless, Hyde would never admit to anything anyways… He sighed and ran his hands through his hair again, great, now he’d have to worry about whatever the other was up to…

...This was going to be a long week… After a day had passed you decided you’d visit Jekyll, you were curious about his work and maybe you could get to know him a little better in the process, it wasn’t too hard a place to find too which was good, you knocked on the door and a Butler answered the door “Ah you must be (Y/N)... The Master has told me about you, please do come in” You nodded at this. You then made your way inside and wow… It sure was fancy, a lot fancier than you were used to for sure, then again, what else were you even expecting with such a famous doctor? The Butler cleared his throat “My name is Poole... The Master is in his Laboratory right now, if you will wait here a moment I will go and fetch him” You nodded and waited as he entered through the door, you took this moment to properly look around the place, it was huge and had a lot of fancy decorations, lots of fancy pictures, overall it was just… Super fancy, of course, even though you didn’t know much of this man, there was one thing for sure, all of this house definitely seemed fitting for him, after a few more moments of waiting you heard the door open and turned to see a smiling Henry “Ah! (Y/N), I didn’t, um, actually expect you to visit so soon…! There isn’t anything wrong, is there?”

You shook your head and smiled “No, just thought I’d come by and see you, this... Isn’t a bad time is it?” Henry quickly shook his head “No no! Not at all! Would you like something to drink while you are here?” You nodded “Some tea would be nice…” Henry nodded and told Poole to fetch him and you some tea, he nodded and got straight to work, meanwhile the doctor led you to the couch and you both sat down “So, how have you been doing today?” You shrugged “The day’s been alright so far, I had some free time today hence why I got to drop by here… How about you?”

Henry smiled “Yes, it’s been… Good so far, I have just been working around in the Laboratory for the time being as per usual” You nodded “Made any new discoveries yet, orrr anything interesting in particular happen?” Henry then shook his head “Not quite yet… I am still working on a few things here and there but those are just simply works in progress for now… Alchemy can be so fascinating and interesting once you get involved in it!” You nodded “I see… I dunno if I could ever understand honestly” There was a pause before he spoke up “If you would like, I can show you some of my works in progress” You looked at him in a surprised manner, and even he looked surprised, he was never usually the type to let many if ANYONE down there in his Laboratory… And then Poole was delivering the tea to the both of you, Jekyll thanking him quickly and then Poole promptly left out of the room to give you two more privacy, after that you looked at the doctor “I mean… If you wanna show me, then I wouldn’t mind…” You gave him a smile which honestly made his heart flutter every time he saw that bright smile of yours, granted he knew it shouldn’t, this was far too soon for any nonsense like that.

It was strange even because the more Henry looked into your eyes the more he felt his heart rate spike, those eyes held something he couldn’t describe, and whenever those eyes landed on him he swore he could almost feel a blush threatening to appear, he needed to stop being so ridiculous, he needed to get a hold of himself! He quickly grabbed his cup of tea and began drinking, you did the same and for a few moments it was silent until you spoke up “Your house is very beautiful” You honestly didn’t know of anything to really say but something was better than nothing, this made the other smile “Ah thank you” ...Jeez, okay, you needed… To just, relax, you didn’t know why you were being so uptight with him, and honestly he seemed a little nervous as well.

You took a deep breath after taking a sip of tea and then you sat it down on the table “So uh, if you want… You can, go ahead and show me the projects you're working on…” Jekyll seemed to notice you finally relaxed and he was relieved of that, he almost felt himself relax a little as well “Oh, of course…!” He stood up after sitting his tea down “Come on, follow me!” He exclaimed, he was excited in all honesty to show someone his work, especially you.

...Ahem- (I’ll be honest, writing peeps first meeting n getting to know each other  is not my strong suit but just bear with me) You followed him down to the stairs and you gasped upon seeing his Laboratory, the room was huge and it was filled with, okay, well you didn’t know what all it was exactly but from what you could see there were lots of bottles and beakers filled with various substances, there were also lots of notes here and there, files, and honestly a lot of stuff cluttered around “I uh, have been meaning to organize things a bit better in here but I got caught up in my work…” He could hear a voice in the back of his mind that said liar, you just got lazy… But he merely shooed that away, he prayed that Hyde wouldn’t bother him right now… You looked around the Lab in awe “It looks so cool…! If you uh, want I can help you clean up the papers” Jekyll shook his head “I appreciate your offer but I will clean it up myself, later on…” You then noticed some weird ingredients in some jars on the table, you walked over and knelt down to get a better look at them “What’s this…?” Jekyll looked over to the jars and smiled brightly “Ah! Those were two ingredients I had been planning to mix together recently, I got sidetracked with other things however…”

He then walked over and pointed to the jar that held some green looking leaves “This would be Scented Bay Leaves…!” He grabbed the jar and carefully opened it, holding it up to your face, you sniffed at it and the leaves definitely had a strong floral scent to them, he then closed them back up and sat them down, he grabbed the other jar and the material inside looked… Well, very strange if you were going to be honest with yourself… “And this is, well it’s some of one of my own formulas I have made before” The liquid inside the jar was a bit cloudy and gray looking and it looked gross, he then opened the jar and sat it back down on the table, he grabbed the bay leaves jar and opened it back up, he grabbed a pair of tweezers and set them down near the jars and then he grabbed a beaker, he also put some thick looking gloves on (be safe when your fucking experimenting and toiling in gods domain sometimes ok?) He told you stand back just a bit and you did so, you could still what he was doing as he picked up the tweezers and grabbed one of the scented bay leaves with it, he hovered it over to the jar with the weird liquid inside and after a few moments he lowered it and dropped the leaf into the substance.

After a few moments of nothing happening, the substance began to bubble up, it was foaming and okay… It was overflowing a little onto a tray he had quickly set it into, luckily it didn’t seem like it was going to overflow out of the tray, you looked on in awe as you watched the liquid bubble and foam and then slowly begin turning into a Dark Purple color and you were amazed but Jekyll seemed a little… Disappointed “Ah… ...T-That was… Supposed to turn Black… N-Not a Dark Purple like this” He saw Hyde manifest in the corner of the room and he could see the other laughing at him, laughing at his failure, he tried to just ignore the other which was always easier said than done, he took the gloves off and cast them to the side and sighed, you walked up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder which he did flinch a little at, but he quickly relaxed upon seeing a smile upon your face “Well… I uh, I don’t know how it went wrong or what exactly went wrong… But that… That was still cool…!” Henry looked surprised, he expected you to laugh at him as well, he expected you to comment about his failure and give him a bit of scrutiny even, this definitely caused a blush to appear on his face and Hyde was even stunned by this, jeez… You REALLY weren’t like the others, they would have laughed directly in his face!

This quieted the ghostly being in the corner down immediately, he watched Jekyll’s facial expressions carefully, given how long Hyde had been with Jekyll, he knew the man inside and out, literally… He could hear those thoughts, those thoughts the other kept trying to bury deep down, trying not to think like that, this was… Definitely interesting, he wanted to see just how this little story played out… Henry quickly cleared his throat and there was a smile on his face “...Thank you… I… I appreciate that…” You nodded

“Yeah… I’m sure you’ll get it next time…! Just uh, be careful… I dunno much about Alchemy but I don’t want you getting hurt” Jekyll nodded “But of course… I always try my best to be careful…” You looked up at the clock and it was getting late “Oh jeez…! I should really get going, thank you for the tea and for showing me your lab, this was cool! I had a lotta fun!” Henry suppressed a sigh, he hated that you had to go so soon, he wished you could stay here, with him… Forever… ...What was he thinking?!? He quickly spoke up “Oh of course, sorry to have kept you so long haha… Do you want me to walk you home tonight?” You shook your head “I appreciate that offer again but I’ll be fine…! I gotta hurry, I’ve got a lot to do tomorrow but the next day I’ll be free, seeya then?” Jekyll took a moment before nodding “If you want, remember you are free to stop by anytime you would like!”

You nodded and waved him goodbye, he waved goodbye to you as well and watched as you walked back up the stairs. He quickly took a seat in his chair and sighed in bliss, you were so wonderful… You didn’t judge him once or think his fascination and love for Alchemy was nonsense or ridiculous, you didn’t even give him any scrutiny for his little experiment failing in such a way… Which okay, he was still a little embarrassed about, next time he’d need to make sure things wouldn’t fail, he wanted to properly impress you… He wanted you to stay with him forever… His eyes widened a little at that thought, that thought had been creeping in a lot, jeez, he needed to get a grip on himself, that was not the type of thought to be thinking, especially not since you two were still getting to know each other...

He then glanced over to Hyde who was still standing in the corner, the two locking eyes and then Hyde was approaching without a word, this worried the doctor for a moment “...H-Hyde?” The ghostly figure never once breaking his gaze with the doctor as he stopped right in front of him, his expression was neutral as he studied Henry’s nervous one… After a few moments he suddenly smirked “You really a r e in love already… You want them, you want them s o badly… You are willing to do a n y t h i n g and e v e r y t h i n g to have them by your side…”

Jekyll was about to object to that statement but Hyde held up a clawed hand “I’m N O T finished yet… Jekyll, I can r e a d your thoughts, even the ones you’ve been so desperately hiding, the one you’ve been burying ever since you first laid eyes on them… I’d say this goes f a r beyond just love… It’s…” Hyde grinned before continuing “O b s e s s i o n…” He rasped out, this made Jekyll shake his head and he shot up out of his seat “I- No, that is not-” He felt himself get pushed back into his seat.

He was surprised at that, but Hyde got f a r too close for comfort, he could practically feel the other grab at his shirt collar “Henny… Don’t you d a r e lie to me…! I k n o w you from the inside and o u t… You can’t hide anything from me~ You are obsessed with them…! I never thought you would ever be obsessed over anything b u t your little experiments but here we are…~” He chuckled, stepping back a little as the doctor shook his head “...I… I don’t know what you are referring to, Hyde, now kindly leave me alone…” The figure laughed at Henry “Oh but you d o… Henny… C’mon~ If you’ll allow me, I can take care of this~! I can go get them for you!” Jekyll immediately stood and Hyde was surprised at the glare in the other’s eyes “Don’t you DARE! I will NOT let you hurt them! I will-” Hyde cut him off immediately “I don’t mean to hurt them, dumbass… What I mean is… I can fetch them for you! You want to keep them, you want them by your side…! I can go fetch (Y/N) for you! All you must do is give me the chance! I’ll deliver your precious (Y/N) unto you~” Henry shook his head “No way Hyde, there is no way I am going to let you out to do anything of the sort! I am NOT obsessed like you seem to think I am…! You are just trying to trick me like you always here, so I will let you have some inkling of control but I am NOT going to do that!” Hyde scoffed and crossed his arms “...Think about it, Jekyll… I’ll give you some time” And just like that, Hyde was gone.

Henry huffed in pure frustration, taking his glasses off to momentarily clean them before putting them back on his face, he sat back and slumped down in the chair, running his hands through his hair “...I am NOT obsessed with them… I just think they are quite charming and nice and I… I just… Want to get to k-know them a little better, that’s all…” Jekyll tried not to think of Hyde’s words, tried not to think of any of that but during the night, even as he tried to sleep… He could not take his mind off of you, even into the next day, ever since he first met you he had been thinking about you non-stop, he had been thinking about you being by his side, you being his in general… His beloved… The further into the day it got the more those thoughts intensified, at first he had thought maybe Hyde was somehow influencing this but that wouldn’t be right, Hyde wouldn’t care for such a thing surely… Jekyll never knew Hyde to express attraction or any kind of love to anyone before, as much as he could try, blaming it on Hyde wouldn’t work this time… Because this wasn’t that monster’s doing, this wasn’t his mentality, it was all of Jekyll’s own accord, all his own thoughts… He sighed, he tried to work on his experiments throughout this day since you wouldn’t be coming over, and he wanted to try taking his mind away from you.

Try as he might, nothing seemed to work, usually working with his experiments took his mind off of anything else, but not you… You were still in his head, you were still his primary thought, he tried to read, write some stuff down even, but no matter what happened, no matter what he did, he kept thinking of you… This day finally passed and yet another night of him dreaming of you, dreaming of you standing by his side, dreaming of you two holding hands together, the two of you even sharing a kiss one day perhaps… The next day you had come by just as you said you would, you greeted the doctor happily and even gave him a little hug, he froze at this at first but then he had the brightest and warmest smile on his face as he placed one arm around you, he… Wasn’t used to being hugged but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy one from you… So soft, so warm… Like the day you first visited him, the two of you sat down and had some tea together and got to know each other a good bit better, asking each other various questions and the more you talked about yourself, the things you liked, just…

Anything and everything about yourself made Jekyll’s heart swoon, you were so passionate about your hobbies and the things that interested you, he even felt like you matched his own passion for things of that sort… It only made him adore you all the more… He listened to you go on and on and let you talk mostly, usually he loved to talk about his accomplishments and he’d lead conversations but he was more than happy to let you have the stage here… Eventually it was evening and time for you to leave again, he was sad to see you go but he knew you’d be back the next day, and it continued like that for the next FEW days actually, you kept coming to visit him, the two of you would talk about how your days have went, any new discoveries Jekyll had, etc- Like always by the evenings, you’d have to leave and get back home, this would leave Henry to think about you during the evening and the rest of the nights, slowly but surely he realized, he couldn’t fight this feeling off much longer, he still was not obsessed no matter what Hyde had tried to tell him, it was probably just another tactic of his to gain control or to upset him or something… Another day had come by, you knocked on the door and were greeted once more by Poole who looked delighted to see you “Ah, (Y/N), please do come in, The Master is waiting for you…”

Now, unbeknownst to Jekyll, during those few days, Poole had pulled you aside along with the other maids and told you about Henry seeming so much more happier since you came along, Poole mentioned how the doctor seemed to like you a lot actually, any time you said you were coming over he’d practically beam and the more Poole told you, you… Really needed to tell the doctor something this day, he knew it was something important from what you had said over the phone before coming here, he was sitting on the couch and smiling like usual, he waved you over “Ah, hello (Y/N)!” You smiled back albeit much more nervously “H-Hi Henry…” You came over and sat down, at first Jekyll had asked for some tea for the both of you but you quickly spoke up “Um, I-I don’t want any tea right now, I’m not… Thirsty…” Jekyll seemed to take notice of your nervousness “...(Y/N)? I...Is there something wrong? You did say you had something important to discuss with me before coming over here… You aren’t sick or anything are you?” Jekyll simply motioned for Poole to leave for now which he quickly did, you then shook your head “No no… I-I uh, I’m not sick… I have… I have something to ask you…” Henry raised a brow “And what would that be? If you need money for something, I can gladly-” You cut him off “N-No, nothing like that…!”

You took a deep breath, already you were beginning to tremble… “...I… I… Jekyll… Do… Do you…” And then you paused, you were sweating a little, jeez… This was going to be harder than you first thought… He waited patiently however as you tried to steel yourself, you took some deep breaths and after a few moments you finally blurted out “...Do you like me?” Henry blinked in surprise as he looked into your eyes, he then quickly looked away, a blush forming on his cheeks “...I… Erm… W-Well… I uh…” There was a pause from him, he kept his gaze down to the floor as he spoke “...Well, to be quite honest with you (Y/N)... Yes, yes I do…” ...And that’s what you were afraid of… Oh boy… Jekyll studied your expression, one of sadness… He was confused, but he waited since it looked as if you were about to speak, you stood up as you did so “...While that is… Flattering… I-I… I’m sorry… I… I al-I al...alre…” You felt a lump in your throat, you were so worried he was going to be angry or react poorly “...I...I already have a partner…”

There was a long pause, it was awkward and so silent you could hear a pin drop in this very room… You slowly looked toward Henry who seemed to be processing this for a moment, he then stood which worried you but then you saw a smile on his face. It wasn’t a bright or happy one but still “I understand, (Y/N)... I want to ease your mind, I am not going to overreact, I am not going to get angry or upset over it… That would be so childish of me” You looked surprised, even though he was clearly a little hurt, you stood yourself “...Th-Thanks for understanding… We can still be f-friends if you want though…! I-I mean unless y-you think poorly of me now… O-Or if t-this made it too awkward…”

Henry shook his head “No no, not at all… I am not going to think poorly of you, I should apologize though, I hope I did not make you feel uncomfortable in all this either… If you don’t mind or find it too awkward, I would love to still be friends with you” He held out a hand, offering a handshake which you smiled and took “Of course… Th-Thank you… Thank you s-so… So much for understanding… I-I’m sorry if I l-” After shaking hands he then held his up “No no, none of that now… I promise you, it’s fine, you do not have to apologize” You nodded “Alright… I-I’ll still come and visit you… If you’ll allow me” Jekyll nodded “You are welcome here anytime, you and your partner both if they wish to come along!” You nodded and gave him a hug which he hugged back, and then you were on your way, waving goodbye to him and he did the same to you.

Once you were out the door and out of sight, he let his hand fall to his side, and then it balled into a fist, he glared daggers at the door, he heard Poole enter the room and he spoke up “...Poole, I am going to be in my Laboratory for awhile… I want NO disturbances from ANYONE, is that understood?” Poole quickly nodded as he heard his Master’s tone “Yes sir… Of course…” Jekyll then stormed over to his lab door, slamming it shut and locking it behind himself, Poole looked at the front door, he had overheard a bit of the conversation from the other room, he did not intend on eavesdropping but still, he sighed “...I hope he will be alright…” He then rushed off to go tell the maids and others not to bother the doctor any tonight, to let him cool off…

Meanwhile Henry had stormed down to his lab, right over to the table and he placed his hands upon it, for a moment he simply stood there, before he shoved everything right off the table and into the floor, the crashing and smashing of jars echoing off the wall, he then pounded his fist directly into the table, he screamed out in frustration as he punched the table over and over to the point where his knuckles were red… The thoughts going through his head right now weren’t pleasant, after all this time, all the days they spent talking together, after him trying to gain confidence to ask you out, it turned out you already had a significant other!

The thought of anyone else besides him holding you close made him want to wretch, it made him sick to his stomach to think that someone out there had stolen his love away, they stole Y/N from him… They stole them away, that wretched disgusting excuse of a living creature had stolen his precious Y/N away from him! He felt so many things… He felt anger first and foremost, then he felt sorrow and heartache, and then he felt sick to the point where he was almost sure he would vomit… Every time he thought of your partner, every time he thought of them kissing you, holding you close, saying those three little words that HE should be saying, NOT them… HE should be the one holding you close, HE should be the one kissing you, HE should be the one you love! NOT them! Not ANYONE else! HE was the ONLY one you should have ever fallen for!

And yet here some dirty filthy scumbag had gotten to you before he could? ...No… No NO NO! He was NOT going to simply stand by and allow this! After all the days and nights he spent thinking of you, after all he had secretly written down about you, the love letters he had even written but was too afraid to send, oh no… He was NOT going to let you go that easily… No, you WERE going to be his, you WILL be his…! He stood there, fists clenching in anger, a darkness in his gaze for once, something he usually only saw in Hyde… And then it hit him… He had denied this for so long, he denied having feelings for you in the first place, denied so many things…

...He was done denying, even if he had to admit this was an obsession… Then so be it, he was done holding back, he was far too desperate… Far too desperate to have you here, with him, by his side, he was so desperate to hear you say you loved him instead of that disgrace of a human being, the more he thought about them… He felt pure disgust wash over him, there was no way they were fitting for someone as perfect as you, no way they were fit to have such a lovely being as yourself standing by their side, no one so lowly deserved you… You were his… You… You would be his… And then he slowly raised his head up, he noticed he had been crying a little as well in the process of this.

He wiped his tears away and then slowly he turned his head to the bottle on one of his tables, it was a dark brown bottle… “...Tr-Tri… Trichloromethane…” He muttered to himself, that bottle of sweet smelling liquid… Usually called Chloroform… He stared at the brown bottle before looking back down to the table, his hands grasped at the table and he continued to stare for a moment before he took a deep breath and then spoke aloud… “...Hyde…?” Right on cue, the being manifested right behind him, even though Hyde hadn’t manifested into his ghostly form before, he heard and saw the entire thing unfold… He had a smug smirk on his face “Yes, J e k y l l…?” There was a long moment of silence as the doctor slowly stood upright, he walked over to the other table, the monster following right behind him, Jekyll’s hands balled into fists at first before he grabbed a beaker of green liquid, there was a long pause, a tense aura filling the room before Henry finally spoke up “...Go fetch them for me… ...Please…” The desperation in the doctor’s voice was almost too intoxicating for the monster that stood behind him, there was a moment of silence before he grinned, displaying razor sharp teeth “...But of course, d o c t o r~” Another pause before he chuckled “...Do you want me to dispose of their partner as well…?”

“...Do what you wish, just do not hurt (Y/N) no matter what, quite frankly I do not care what happens to their partner, whether they live ...Or they die…” Hyde’s grin widened immensely at that “Ooh~” His voice getting a bit raspier, he was getting more excited by the second… Henry quickly consumed the substance from the beaker and he clutched at himself, it had been so long since he let himself drink this vile thing… Since he had let Hyde take control, but that was the least of his worries, he didn’t care about Hyde having control right now, he just wanted Y/N… That’s the only thing in his mind right now, that’s all he wanted… He did let out a loud cry of pain as he slowly began transforming into the very monster he had been fighting for so long to keep restrained, even if Hyde got out sometimes on occasion, Jekyll was still mostly in control… He could feel his body morphing and changing, first was his height, he grew to be about six foot six at least, then those razor sharp teeth were poking through, pointed ears and claws growing into place, and those multiple tongues lashed out into the air as he let out a heavy breath.

After a few moments of his body morphing and changing and making so many god awful noises, this was it… Hyde was FINALLY in control again! He looked down at his large clawed hands as he moved his fingers individually, he let out a very raspy and shaky breath, he had pure ecstasy coursing through his veins right now “...O h… To be f r e e  a g a i n…” He quickly looked up and walked over toward the mirror, looking over himself “Ahh…” He breathed out, this was REALLY happening, he was FINALLY in control! (for personal reasons, Hyde takes control and the fuckin outfit comes with him fdjkslrjfgdks its also funny as fuck to imagine just Hen transforming and Hyde comes out along with his clothing) “Oh my d e a r… You have n o clue what you’ve just done…” Hyde laughed, his laugh raspy and horrible just as it always was, he turned his attention to the bottle of chloroform and walked over, grabbing it and a rag “This should come in handy…” Hyde glanced over as he saw Jekyll manifest into ghost form “Hyde, do you have an actual plan?” The monster cackled at that question “What do you take me for, some kinda idiot?” “...Yes actually” And there was a snarl from Hyde, he looked angry at that and he stopped dead in his tracks.

“Hmph… I guess you really don’t want (Y/N) as bad as I thought…” Henry quickly spoke up “No! NO! Hyde, please…” There was a pause, even with the ghostly form Jekyll took, Hyde could see the pure desperation in the other’s eyes “I apologize… Just, please, I want them… I n e e d them by my side…” The monster smiled wide, “That’s more like it… Mm, don’t you worry… By the end of the night, they’ll be by your side alright… You know, I’m q u i t e interested in meeting them myself, for such a being to exist to cause t h i s sort of reaction from you… For it to go as far as you finally letting me have control, WILLINGLY at that, I need to know m o r e…” And then he set off, he of course took the back entrance, not wanting Poole nor any of the others to see him, he crept off into the night, it was wonderfully dark out, even with the nightlights on, the moon was covered in clouds, oh this was so incredibly perfect… He could easily track the both of you down and go undetected! This was perfection! And it felt so good to have the breeze brush through his hair, to smell the disgusting air of the city, it was revolting and yet he loved it so! He ran through the darker parts of the street, only running into and knocking over a few people which he didn’t stop for in the slightest, he only chuckled as he darted past, he had a mission to do!

He paused for a moment to sniff at the air before quickly running again (fuckin- animalistic predator lookin ass) after a bit he arrived near your home, he hid in the shadows as quickly as he could as he watched you and your partner walking up to the door, hand in hand, he sneered at this display, they wouldn’t be holding hands for too much longer, while Hyde didn’t see anything in particular about you, he knew there was something special about you, he even heard and definitely felt Jekyll’s heartbeat pick up, the doctor manifesting himself beside Hyde, he watched as you conversed with your partner, and then they gave you a quick peck on the lips, that made Henry ball his hands into fists “...So they are the one who stole my (Y/N) away from me… I… I…” There was a pause as Hyde turned to look at Jekyll, he saw a look he had never seen before in the weak and usually timid doctor, he was so shy usually but the look he saw, and the words the other spoke… “I h a t e them…” He hissed before continuing “I want them OUT of the picture…! (Y/N) is mine and mine alone…!” Hyde snickered “With all the time I’ve spent with you, I have n e v e r seen t h i s from you before…”

“You are usually such a righteous man, the thoughts you're thinking right now… Such violence…~ Are you going to blame that on me this time, or will you finally accept that you're not as righteous as you claim?” Jekyll sighed “...I… I… Hyde, please just, focus… I am fed up with waiting… I need them, I want to hold them close in my embrace… I want to give them the proper love that they need” The monstrous figure rolled his eyes “Yeah yeah, I get it… You want them, you looove them… Blegh… I don’t see it…” And then Jekyll vanished, leaving Hyde to watch you enter your home with your partner, he’d strike but not yet… He wanted to wait just a bit longer, given the time of night that it was, you two would surely be going to bed very soon… Even though love wasn’t something Hyde particularly cared about, he was still curious about you himself, he could feel it deep down himself, perhaps being a part of Jekyll, if he gains an obsession over someone, perhaps it affects him as well then… ...He’d find out soon enough, he was sure of it, he waited for a bit and then he saw the lights all turn off and he grinned “Oh… Sweetness… You’ll be ours soon enough, it’s fate…” He waited a few moments longer before slowly creeping from the shadows, it was time…

Meanwhile… You had fallen asleep cuddled up right next to your partner, it had been a long night out, they took you out to get some ice cream so you wouldn’t feel as bad as you did for earlier, you knew it had hurt Jekyll and even with him reacting as well as he did, you still couldn’t help but feel guilty, so your partner decided to take you out tonight and take your mind off it, and it did help a lot, going out and enjoying the night… It felt good, boy were you exhausted when you had arrived home however, it had felt good to get into bed, you fell asleep fairly quickly along with them after you two had gotten ready and then turned the lights off… You were sound asleep, snoring softly, blissfully unaware of the danger that was slowly creeping in through an open window in your home, it was prowling around in your kitchen at first, eating some of the food you owned which Jekyll scolded it for, the monstrous figure only rolled his eyes at the ghostly manifestation, shooing him away with a clawed hand, Hyde might have been on a mission currently but there was no way it was going to pass up an opportunity to cause a little mischief here and there, he looked around the place and it was rather basic, far too boring of a place for his standards.

He wandered around, trying not to knock anything over, although being silent for a being as wide and large as him was easier said than done, he crept through the house, looking for the bedroom in particular, after he found it and saw you sleeping so soundly, he grinned, he almost couldn’t contain himself as he crept to the foot of your bed, he stared at you for a moment, how could such a being drive Jekyll to this point… He was so curious of you, not many things nowadays caught Hyde’s attention but you? You definitely piqued his interest… Maybe not in the way you did with Jekyll but he still held a certain interest in you… He stood at the foot of your bed, staring at you and then his attention turned to your partner who slept just as soundly, he grinned at them, so this was the one keeping you away and driving Jekyll to the point of pure anger, driving him to let this monstrous beast take control? ...Hm, this would be much simpler than Hyde thought, and then he saw you stir, his attention immediately snapping back to you as you raised up, rubbing your eyes slightly and looking around the room, you then laid back down for a few moments before…

You immediately shot back up and glanced toward Hyde, your eyes as wide as could be as you stared at the tall figure, he was covered in the shadows but you could see those eyes staring back at you, those glowing red eyes, and then you could see a wicked grin, full of too many teeth in the dark, you looked toward your partner and began shaking them to wake them up, it took a few moments before they grumbled “Wh-What is it, hun…?” You quickly spoke “T-Th-The...There’s a person…! THERE’S A PERSON STARING AT US!” You quickly shrieked, this made your partner shoot right up to look in front of them, however when you looked back toward the spot, that figure was gone… Your partner had turned on the lamp to illuminate the room a little and there was definitely nobody there now “B-But… I-I KNOW I saw someone…! It… It had red glowing eyes and… And… T-Those teeth…” Your partner looked at you, they were definitely a bit skeptical of that but... “Do you want me to check it out, (Y/N)?” You bit your lip and nodded, they got out of bed, and grabbed a flashlight from the drawer “You wanna come with me?” You shook your head “I-I think I’ll just stay r-right here…” Your partner nodded “If someone tries anything, whack ‘em with the lamp, there’s plenty of shit in here to use…!” You nodded at that and watched as they first shined the flashlight toward the shadow-y spot.

They then checked the entire bedroom before leaving to go check the rest of the house, you heard them fumbling around in the other rooms as you took a look around the bedroom, not really getting out of the bed since the room was illuminated enough and they had checked it out beforehand, you had no idea what you saw but you knew it was something or someone staring back at you from the darkness… You knew that wasn’t just a dream or hallucination surely, there was no way… You were awake right now as well! After a bit you realized you couldn’t hear your partner anymore, no noises indicating them searching things “A-Are you okay?” You called out loud enough so they’d be able to hear and no response…

You tried calling out their name and nothing and that’s when you immediately got out of bed and walked toward the bedroom door, you peered out and saw nobody so you called out again, still no response, you were starting to get worried now… You made your way down the hall and right as you got to the bathroom you let out a scream as something jumped in front of you, after you had stumbled back only then had you recognized it was your partner who was laughing, you immediately stood and glared at them “T-That wasn’t funny! What the HELL is wrong with you?!” You gave them a punch in the shoulder, nothing too hard of course, it was merely a playful punch even if you were actually a little angry with them.

They laughed and rubbed at their shoulder “Oh man! You shoulda seen the look on your face (Y/N)! Holy shit, that got you w a y more than I expected!” They continued to laugh as you huffed and crossed your arms “That wasn’t funny at all… I thought something bad happened to you…!” Finally their laughter died down a little “I’m sorry, c’mon… It was just a lil joke…” You let out a hmph “It wasn’t a very good or funny one…!” They bit their lip to refrain from any more laughter “Alright, alright… (Y/N), c’mon… I’m sorry, I couldn’t resist, ya know it was too good an opportunity to pass up!” They wrapped their arms around you in a hug “Coommeee oonnn… Honey, please don’t be mad…!” They were beginning to look like a hurt puppy “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again!” You laughed at that “Yeah right…! You’d absolutely do it again if you got the chance!” And then they snickered “...Well yeah maybe~” You huffed but proceeded to hug them back “You’re very mean…” They chuckled “I know~” They then pulled back and held your hand.

“In all seriousness though, we should get back to bed, I checked everywhere in the house, no signs of anyone or anything, no signs of someone breaking in, nothing…” You sighed, a bit relieved, maybe it was a mere hallucination “...M-Maybe I was just seeing things…” Your partner nodded “I think we’re both still exhausted… It’s been a long day, come on dear, let’s get back to bed and rest… And tomorrow we’ll… w-we’ll…” Your partner began trailing off and you could feel their hand beginning to tremble, you looked toward them and saw their eyes were wide “H-Honey…? [Partner’s Name]? ...W-What’s wrong? You look like you’ve seen a ghost…! Tch, are you seriously trying to scare me again?!” (I’ll let y’all name your own partner, it's a useless thing but ya know have some fun)

They didn’t respond, they were frozen for a moment before they pulled their hand away from yours and shakily pointed behind you, you huffed “I swear… If this is another one of your scare tactics, you’ll be sleeping on the couch tonight…!” You turned around and then your eyes widened just like theirs… “...H-Holy shit…” You muttered, you were staring up at a large figure, he was dressed from head to toe in a black and red, his eyes were also red, and then you noticed his grin, those were ra… Razor sharp teeth… T-This was the thing that had been staring at you in the bedroom!

“Ah…” He rasped out, his breath ghosting over you and okay… His breath reeked, it almost made both you and your partner gag right there “Good evening you two…~” His voice was bone-chilling and as raspy as one could get, you were staring into his eyes for a moment, frozen with fear before your partner had grasped onto your arm and immediately pulled you back “Run!” They shouted, quickly tugging you along with them, you sprinted alongside them and the figure only snarled as it charged forward “You cannot escape me, my love!” It called out, he seemed surprised he uttered that in particular, ah… Perhaps fascination would soon turn into obsession, either way he wasn’t going to focus on that right now, he had a job to do…! As you both almost made it to the front door, the figure had pulled out a cane and whacked your partner in the back of the head, they collapsed to the ground as you screamed out, you could see some blood running down and onto the floor, you knelt down beside them and your hands were trembling, you had almost forgot about the massive being standing just over them for a second before he lifted his cane up again, you quickly shoved him back away and stood in front of them.

“I won’t let you hurt them again! If you wanna kill them you gotta go through me!” The figure only snarled and lowered his cane “You are a defiant little one, aren’t you?” He then paused before chuckling “I couldn’t care less about them! It’s y o u who I’m after my dear…~ Since I’m in an oh so generous mood tonight… I’ll give you a choice, you can make this much easier for yourself if you’ll come along quietly with me or you can choose the hard way and run and well… You won’t like what happens then~ And don’t forget, if you run now, I’ll have an opportunity to swing at your precious little partner~ And if they aren’t dead already, then they will be with this next hit!” You bit your lip, he was right… If you tried to run he could easily swing again and if they weren’t dead already, there’s no way they could take another hit… Before you answered him you looked down at your partner, they weren’t moving, you had hoped they were only unconscious, not much blood had come out, not enough to cause death surely… Then again you didn’t know but either way, you couldn’t risk them getting hit again, you wouldn’t risk it… You looked toward the figure and nodded “F-Fi...Fine… I-I’ll go with you…”

The figure grinned widely “Excellent choice my dear…” And then it grabbed your arm, a bit too harshly and was dragging you out the door, you took one look back at your partner, they still weren’t moving but you could only hope they would be alright, after all, had you tried anything he’d surely go back for them, and that was the last thing you wanted… You didn’t want them to die, maybe… Maybe someone would even call for help, the figure tugged you closely to his side and snarled “Keep up…! You might as well forget they ever existed, because you’re never going to see ‘em again…!” You glared up at the figure “Wh-Who even are you anyways…?” There was a pause before he grumbled “...You may call me Edward Hyde…” So it did have a name… “Wh-Where are yo-you even taking me…?” He rolled his eyes “Tch, so noisy… You’ll see when we get there my dear~” This was FAR easier than Hyde had expected, he didn’t even have to use the chloroform he had grabbed earlier! He kept dragging you down the street and as much as you did try to resist, the man had a v i c e grip on your arm practically, you continued walking with him until you got way farther from your home before you suddenly held a leg out in front of him, sure this winded up tripping both him and you up but you were faster than he would be.

You quickly got up before he did and as he tried to grab your ankle you quickly kicked him in the face and dashed away as he yelled out your name, you were not going back to your home, no way were you going to endanger your partner like that, and there was no way he was going to go all the way back to your house just to finish them off either, he wouldn’t go out of his way like that surely, you dashed down a different street, you had no idea where it led but you didn’t care as long as you got away from that thing… You kept running into the night, it was very late and there wasn’t a soul in sight, everyone was most likely in bed by this hour, this street had a bunch of large homes, mansions in fact… This must’ve been a place where very rich people lived, and you didn’t figure they’d help someone like you out, you looked around, not knowing where to go next, and then it hit you…

Maybe you could go back to Jekyll’s place! If he’s there he’d surely protect you! You looked at one of the street signs as you were coming up to it, Jekyll’s home was a street over from this one! Luckily there seemed to be access from the street you were currently on, you made a mad dash for that street in particular, you hadn’t heard Hyde in awhile, you hadn’t seen him either, you hoped maybe he had just given up entirely, maybe it got bored of the chase, either way, you wouldn’t stop running until you got to Jekyll’s home.

Eventually, you had managed to get there, your legs had almost given out on you during the run, you were breathing heavily, chest heaving with heavy ragged breaths as you rung the doorbell, after a few moments nothing happened, but you rang the doorbell again and then a light came on, you waited for a few moments and then you were greeted by Poole who looked surprised “(Y/N)? What on earth are you doing here at this hour? And… ...Oh my… Is everything alright? You look frightened…!” You took a moment to breathe in and out before explaining to Poole the entire situation, from the monster attacking your partner, to trying to take you, to you tripping him up and then finally to you running here for some safety… Poole quickly stepped aside and let you come in, knowing that his Master would be q u i t e upset with him if he were to refuse that, and even then, he didn’t necessarily want to see you hurt either, after you dashed inside, he quickly closed the door and locked it before looking back at you “Would you like for me to call the Police?” You thought about it before you realized, while the police could probably help you out, you remembered your partner, laying there on the floor…

“Not f-for me… Please… He… That thing attacked my partner… I-I want the police to go there, and… Get an ambulance f-for them…” Poole nodded, you told him your address really quickly and then he called the Police, he explained a bit of the situation to them, that a terrible incident had occurred and they needed to send some help over to your home, somebody was hurt or potentially worse, after all was explained and done, he hung up the phone “The Police will arrive at your home as soon as they possibly can… If you would like, and I do believe it… IS for the best… You should stay the night, after all… The Master would give me s u c h a scolding if I let you get injured or worse…” You nodded “Y-Yeah… I… I wanna… s-stay here…” After all this, you had almost been on the verge of tears, from thinking of your partner being potentially already dead, to just this insane situation in general, your hands were as shaky as could be… “Wh...Where is… Jekyll a-an...anyways…?” Poole pointed toward the Lab door “The Master has been in his Laboratory all night… I am, admittedly, a bit worried about him… I doubt he would mind it if you went in and checked on him, and besides… You should be the one to inform him of your situation” You nodded, you walked toward the Lab door and carefully turned the knob, to your surprise and especially Poole’s surprise, the door slowly opened, that’s odd… Poole could have s w o r n the doctor locked that door earlier… ...Oh well, either way, he watched you enter the Lab and shut the door behind yourself.

You carefully walked down the steps until you finally reached the Lab itself, you called out so you wouldn’t hopefully frighten the doctor “H-Hey…? Henry…? Are… Are you down here?” You didn’t see him yet but just in case he was in here, you had started to talk about your situation, the danger you could be in and your partner, and that’s what had you on the verge of tears again, you quickly tried to wipe them away, however when you got no response to that… You looked confused “...J-Jekyll…? Poole s-said… You’ve been in here all night… ...A-Are you alright?” Again, nothing but silence and now you were walking around the Lab, it was a fairly big one… But even then you didn’t see him at all, you tried calling out to him again and you were growing more worried by the second, you searched around but saw no sign of him, maybe he had gone out for the night? But then… Oh no… What if he was in danger as well?! You needed to go tell Poole, you turned back around and ran right into something… Something large… You stumbled a little bit but then you looked at the thing you had run into and your heart sank… Your eyes widened as you looked up into the other’s… Those red eyes were all too familiar, and then the figure grinned “My my… It seems I found you again, my love~” He purred, and stepped forward, and then you stepped back, it repeated like this until your back hit a wall which you softly gasped at.

Hyde leaned forward, he was far too close to your face and you could see those sharp teeth that could easily rip you apart if it so desired, his breath ghosted over your skin, it made goosebumps form across your skin and the hairs on your arms stand up, his breathing was purposefully heavy, you could hear rasping and some growls even as he opened his mouth further, a set of tongues lolling out of his mouth, you stared at them, eyes wide with terror as the tongues reached up, caressing your face in a sickeningly gentle manner, you whimpered, tears cascading down your face as you shivered in pure disgust, after that he pulled away and chuckled at you “You really… A r e something special… Aren’t you~?” You glared at him “...What did you do with Doctor Jekyll, you sick fuck…?” Hyde took a moment before…

He burst out with laughter, that laugh sending chills down your spine as it echoed off of the Laboratory walls, after that he looked back at you, a smug smile on his face “Oh… Don’t worry about Doctor Jekyll… He’s perfectly fine my love…~” You looked around for some kind of opening to try and run, it was going to be tough, extremely tough given how large Hyde was, but it wasn’t completely impossible by any means… Hyde wouldn’t deny this either, he was starting to feel… Something himself, maybe it was just as he said earlier, maybe this little obsession was getting to him as well, when he looked into your eyes he felt something… The only thing different being, Jekyll didn't like seeing the tears on your face or seeing you so scared and distraught. Meanwhile Hyde seemed to enjoy it f a r too much to the point where Jekyll had even spoken up “H-Hyde… That’s… That’s enough, don’t scare them anymore than you already have…!” However Hyde merely ignored Jekyll this time around, almost like he didn’t even hear the other in the first place, he brought a clawed hand up and gripped at your chin, forcing you to look him in the eyes, he took his other hand and wiped your tears away, his claw getting dangerously close to nicking you in the eye.

“Shh~ Now now, there’s no need for the waterworks, my dear…~” You tried pulling away from him but his grip was still vice-like and okay, it was beginning to hurt your chin a little bit, you reached up and grasped at his arm “J-Just… What do y-you even w-want from me anyways…?” Hyde chuckled, his grip loosening from your chin finally, you brought your hand up to rub at the spot, that was going to be sore later… “Mm… What I want is v e r y simple… I have told you already or perhaps you’ve forgotten it?” You looked at him, confused, this was your only chance to run because you saw him reaching behind himself into a pocket “...I want…” He rasped out, his hand slowly pulling out a brown bottle, shit… You had a feeling you knew what that brown bottle was “...Y O U!” And with that you slipped past the opening you had seen earlier, it was a tight squeeze to slip past him but you managed to do so, you made a beeline for the stairs, you heard Hyde snarl and okay now he sounded really pissed… As you reached the top step, Hyde jumped up onto something and then over the railing, slamming down on the ground below, it's a good thing this staircase wasn’t made out of wood otherwise Hyde would have had the entire thing come crashing down, he instantly grabbed you and hooked an arm tightly around your waist.

“NOT… This time my love…” He growled out, clear anger in his tone, you still tried to struggle away from him, trying to call out for help in hopes that maybe Poole would hear or someone, as you did this however, his grip only tightened even more to the point where you wheezed, jeez if he tightened his grip anymore he would probably crack a rib, even though this was an awkward kind of position, he managed to open the chloroform, he then threw you to the ground rather harshly and stood over you, he grabbed a handkerchief from his pocket and poured some of the substance onto it, trying not to stain himself nor his clothing, he then tossed the bottle to the far side, meanwhile you were trying desperately to crawl away from him, he crouched down and sat atop you, pressing the handkerchief over your mouth and nose rather harshly, your hands shot up and you tried to fight him off, not that it really did much good, this thing was far stronger than you could ever hope to be, either way you still weren’t going to go down without a fight! You screams were muffled by the rag but you prayed that someone upstairs would hear you, even before when you had screamed, you had hoped someone up there heard those!

You didn’t hear anyone approaching the door or any sounds of someone talking however, and after a few moments and him keeping the rag pushed directly onto your face, your struggles began to slow, and you could feel yourself fading, your vision starting to blur here and there… Even then you struggled until your body wouldn’t allow you to anymore, the last thing you saw was that smug bastard grinning at you before your vision faded and the darkness overcame you… Eventually you shot up out of a bed with a gasp, you were still a bit disoriented from what had happened earlier, you tried to immediately get up out of the bed only to stumble here and there and when someone put their hand on your shoulder you screamed and swatted it away “(Y/N)...! C-Calm down, it’s only me…!” You blinked in surprise, your vision still blurring a bit but you could at least make out who it was, even by voice alone “H-Henry…?” You rubbed at your eyes and that helped your vision a bit, it was enough to see the figure standing in front of you… “Yes, that’s right… It’s me, it’s Henry…” You looked around the Laboratory for any signs of that monster from last night “Wh-Where is… Hyde…?” Jekyll sighed and shook his head “No need to worry yourself with that man, my dear friend… I am assuming you mean the man I saw hovering over you last night of course… Ahem... Let me explain a bit further, if you’ll allow?” You nodded and as you almost stumbled over, Jekyll helped you back onto the bed.

“You see… It must have been after you passed out, because as I walked in the door, I saw h i m… That monster of a being standing over you… You say his name was, erm… Hyde, yes?” You nodded at this and so he continued “I quickly grabbed my cane and ran him off and out of the lab, I… I just… (Y/N)... What was that man even after in the first place? Did he hurt you at all?” You had to take a few moments, you rubbed your face a little and then looked up at Henry “I-I… I don’t know… I don’t… H-He said… He said something about… Me? Wanting… Me…? I don’t understand… I just… He attacked me and my partner… O-Oh god… [Partner’s Name]...” Tears welled up in your eyes and you pulled Jekyll into a hug, he carefully wrapped his arms around you “...I’m sorry (Y/N)... I’m so sorry you had to go through all that… I heard from Poole actually, a bit about that… He said he had called the police for your significant other… I myself, do not know of their condition… But, I heard they got sent to Doctor Lanyon’s Hospital… He is a fine doctor and a friend of mine! If anyone can help your partner, it would be him…” While you couldn’t see his face, Jekyll was smiling, almost smirking even as the hug went on, oh it was so lovely to get to hold you close like this… You felt so warm to him… Sure, one side of him did feel a bit bad for lying to you and for what Hyde had put you through but you were here now and that was all that mattered, he would have to… Thank Hyde for that later, somehow anyways.

Because even despite causing trouble here and there he DID deliver you to the doctor as promised, he did exactly what he said he would do… And even after he was finished, Jekyll could see Hyde over in the corner, just staring at the two of them, his gaze flickering back to you in the end, there was no denying it from the both of them at this point, love and obsession had stricken the both of them, and it was pretty safe to say with one glance, the two of them were definitely in agreement on this one, they would never be letting you go… “...Jekyll? Did you hear what I said?” The doctor blinked before looking back at you “O-Oh…! My apologies, what did you say?” You repeated yourself again “I said… Thank you… For saving me, i-in the end at least… I don’t wanna think about what else… That thing would have done…” Henry nodded and smiled “I… I do wish I could have been here a lot sooner, before he got to you in the first place”

“But… At the very least, I still managed to get to you before he dragged you off to God knows where… And I am just… Glad you're safe…” And then the both of you realized, you were still hugging each other, you pulled away first and chuckled awkwardly, wiping some of the excess tears off your face “Yeah… I’m grateful… For that…” And then Henry looked around the Lab “You know, since such a dangerous man is at large… Perhaps it would be best if you stayed here, with me, Poole, and the others for a while? I, of course, will not force you… But, I would rather you stay with someone at the very least and not risk being alone…” You thought about it for a moment and shuddered “...Y-Yeah… After… What happened… I-I really don’t… Wanna be alone…” And then Jekyll was smiling brightly “Wonderful, you may stay here for as long as you’d like my dear… ...Friend!” He needed to be careful with his wording for now… After all, this was only the beginning, he didn’t want to rush things and risk any suspicion, in due time… You would fall for him, you would fall for the both of them, and even though he is normally a patient man, he can barely w a i t for that day to come, to think of hugging you, kissing you, dancing with you, it filled him with a euphoric sense but for now… 

                            This was only The Beginning…

(Thats the ending, Im making it sound like a chapter thing but I s w e a r its not, I mean unless people would really wanna see it develop n shit go down or whatever but for now, very VERY subtle Yandere undertones from the good righteous man himself, keep in mind btw, these are MY versions of the lads, not- from anything else,, so ye- This was fun and exhausting to write but I’m EXTREMELY proud of this one, sometimes subtly in yandere stories can be fun to write

This literally started off with o n e concept of Jekyll falling for the reader and then it turning into basically an obsession/yandere deal and getting DESPERATE enough to let Hyde take control and go after them and that was it, that one thing spawned this entire story- I didn’t intend for it to be this long either but I figured I might as well see it through to the end otherwise I wouldn’t have been proud, anyways- im just rambling now, I hope y’all enjoyed this <3)

[ellohcee]

Call Me

Okay so I want to throw this little bit out into the universe of one of my favorite instances of Jasper I've written. Context: He's a host for a dinky late night radio show and he has like... 10-15 listeners max and David is one of them, a college student who Can’t Sleep even between classes and his job, so he’s up late late listening to Jasper’s show. He calls in sometimes because Jasper is always offering advice and encouraging people to call in and chat, specifically about LGBTQ topics and David finds comfort and encouragement in their chats. They’ve been talking for a while but he still goes by the name Red. 

- - - -

“Alright you night owls, this next one goes out to my long lost buddy, Red.”

David looked up at the radio in surprise, his pencil stilling on the page.

“It’s been a while since we’ve heard from ya and we miss you dude. And I’m gonna get hella gay up in here, but that’s on brand for me, I miss you.”

David’s breath caught in his throat painfully, his heart hammering.

“So I hope you catch this, give us a call, let me know how you’re doing buddy I’m dyin’ here, don’t leave me hanging. Cause I’ve got a question for you and you wont know what until you gimme a ring. Yes I’m gonna be that guy. So call. Please.”

The music picked back up, and true to Jasper’s word, Blondie’s Call Me started playing.

The pencil had slipped from his fingers without realizing as David tried to decipher all of that, especially that last, sincere please. Jasper missed his calls? Maybe he was just worried because David had dropped off so suddenly. It had just been too nerve wracking once he realized he was crushing on the radio host. But what could Jasper possibly want to ask him? Was it good or bad?

He was still nervous and the idea of calling in downright terrified him now, but… he at least owed it to Jasper to let him know he was alive. It must have looked bad, for him to be consistently calling about once a week and then suddenly stop with no warning, going on nearly two months of silence now. Jasper was always so nice and seemingly happy to talk to him, he must be worried. Gosh, now he had to call, he felt terrible.

David had to take several steadying breaths and about twenty good minutes to work up the nerve, but he managed to eventually press call, hands shaking as he listened to the phone ring.

“What’s up caller you’re live, how’s it hangin?”

“Um, hi...” he said quietly.

He heard a soft intake of air and a shuffle. “That you Red?” Jasper asked, sounding hopeful, the excited smile evident in his voice.

“Y-yes, it’s me,” David replied.

“Aw, buddy, good to hear your voice again man, I was gettin’ worried bout you.”

“I’m so sorry I- just- life, you know?” David hedged, feeling even more guilty because he couldn’t give an honest explanation.

“I feel that, it’s cool dude, it’s just good to hear from ya. I assume you heard my call out?”

David’s heart started beating faster, so, so antsy. If it weren’t for the guilt of worrying Jasper he probably wouldn’t have had the guts to call, but he could still be a wreck about it, easily. “Yes, I did. You... had a question?”

“Yeah! You don’t mind me askin’ live?”

“Um, sure, that’s fine,” David said nervously. It couldn’t be too bad if it was something Jasper could ask on air. Right?

“Sweet. So. Last we talked your rough waves from the coming out thing were settling. You found a boyfriend yet?” the radio host asked casually.

David eyebrows shot up in surprise, his face going so very red and he was so very grateful this was a phone call, not in person because that would make it ten times worse. “Um- n-no, I- I haven’t… um, no,” he stammered uselessly. Why was this the topic??

“Awesome!” Jasper said in delight, leading to an awkward pause. “Wow fuck that sounded hella mean I am so sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. Cheese and crackers, foot in mouth Jasp, good one. Anyway! I just meant because- like, stop me if this is too weird, or hang up on me, but I was wondering if I could like… take ya on a date?”

David’s heart stopped in surprise, the blush that had just started receding coming back full force. His stomach whirled in a mix of dread and excitement, trying to go one way or the other as his brain stalled for a good long moment-

“Red?”

David sucked in a breath. “Is- are you- are you serious?” he asked softly, trying to keep his voice from shaking.

“Course dude!! I wouldn’t fuck around with you like that, hell no! I’m for super serious!”

“But… we’ve- you- you don’t even know what I look like,” David stammered, trying to find reason to turn him down, but so, so desperately wanting to say yes. He felt stupid for saying it the second it left his mouth, Jasper didn’t seem at all the type to place a lot of importance on appearances.

“I don’t need to! I’m sure you’re rad as hell, but I’m not a looks guy, okay? I like your personality, and I love shootin the shit with you, and you’re super nice. That’s the kinda stuff I’m into, and if you’re hella cute, which I’m sure you are, that’s a bonus!”

David stared down at his desk for a long moment, his thoughts a mess, one hand over his mouth as he took this all in. He had to take a moment to pinch the soft skin on the inside of his arm to decide that this was really happening and he hadn’t passed out at his desk into some dream where his crush happened to reciprocate-

“Reeeddd?” Jasper teased softly after another long pause, bringing him out of his panic spiral. “No pressure my dude, you can say no.”

“Yes,” David blurted shakily.

“Yeah??” Jasper asked, his voice picking up in obvious excitement and relief, despite his apparent brace for a rejection. “For real?”

“Y-yes, I’d… I’d like to,” David said softly, his face still red.

“Aw man, awesome, shit. Okay uh- no PI on air so uh- I go off air at 3, you’re usually up pretty late, yeah? Think you’ll be around?”

“Yes, I should be.”

“Supes, call back when you hear me sign off and we’ll hash stuff out, okay? Or at least do personal numbers to talk during the day.”

“O-okay,” David stammered, his mind whirling. “I’ll do that.”

“Sweet. Okay man, you sound a little wigged out so I’ll let you get back, and I will be counting the minutes til sign off,” Jasper teased.

“Okay, um, talk to you later? Bye.”

“Ta-ta for now!” Jasper sung.

David disconnected the call, his pulse still racing as he listened to Jasper on the radio once more, turning the volume back up just in time to hear.

“Oh my god, wack, holy shit you guys he said yes- fuck he’s probably listening and I sound like a giant goober- hi Red! Okay, anymore callers before we go back to music? Holy shitballs.”

A quick, incredulous laugh escaped his mouth before David could stifle it, his chest swirling with fear and elation. Jasper- Jasper had asked him on a date- and he sounded just as rattled as David felt. That helped a little to know it wasn’t just him- Jasper had just been loads better keeping a cap on his nerves while they were talking.

“You’re up caller!”

David came back from his thoughts when he heard a familiar voice, one of Jasper’s other regular callers.

“Oooooh Jasper asked a boy on a daaatteee~” she teased in delight.

“I know oh my god dude I’m still weak from it, I didn’t wanna mess up with Red but I like… really want to meet him and take him out, especially once he stopped calling? And no offense Red if you’re still there it’s TOTALLY cool cause that woke my ass up! Holy shit I still can’t believe he said yes.”

David listened all throughout the rest of Jasper’s show, all thoughts of homework lost as he leaned his elbows on the desk, hands clasped in front of his mouth. Anticipation made his nerves spike again while sitting through Jasper’s familiar sign off, where he bid goodnight to his listeners and started the after hours playlist. David waited a minute before taking a deep, deep breath and pressing the call button.

It rang only once before the line picked up, and a hopeful voice answered. “Red?”

“H-hi Jasper,” he replied.

“Hey dude! Hey, sorry to put you on the spot like that but- y’know, I figured it would be less creepy to everyone to just be upfront and ask you, instead of being like ‘hey call me after hours hoohoo wink wink,’ ya dig?”

David stifled a giggle, smiling. “I understand. It probably would’ve made me more nervous to have to wait that long, wondering what your question was,” he admitted.

“That too! I wanted to just… put it out there, figured it’d be best. So! You’re really cool with going on a date?”

“Yes, I… I’d like that. To meet you,” he added softly, flushed.

“Rad, okay, nice. So let’s just exchange numbers for tonight? I know you might not sleep anyway but it’s friggen late and I don’t want to keep either of us up too long.”

“That sounds good, I don’t want to keep you up either,” David replied. He gave his number first when Jasper gave the go-ahead, listening to the other man hum as he typed it into his phone, and a few moments later David heard a buzz near his ear.

“I just shot you a text so you have my number and can add me.”

“Got it,” David replied, pulling the phone away briefly to see a text notification at the top of the screen, a short string of peace sign emojis that made him smile.

“Awesome sauce. Well- shit, I’m really excited but again, we can talk later. Try to get some sleep, okay dude?” he asked, sounding genuinely concerned and losing his usual casual tone. “I worry bout you.”

David smiled, touched by the thought. “I’ll try.”

“Okay, I’ll text you sometime tomorrow- today, whatever, much later. Give you a chance to snooze. Night Red, and thanks for- you know. Thanks. Night!”

“Goodnight Jasper, and thank you too,” he replied softly.

“No prob, catch ya later.”

David pulled the phone away and ended the call, his heart still hammering as he tried to comprehend everything. But he decided to pack it away for later, turning off the radio and closing the long abandoned textbook. Hopefully he could get a few hours of sleep and be a tiny bit more composed when he next spoke with Jasper.

Doubtful, but it was a nice thought.

[xpao-bearx]

《Original post here》

Part 2 HERE

SUMMARY: [Supernatural TWD AU] In which Negan is a kinky incubus, Rick Grimes is your secret guardian angel, and Daryl Dixon is a gruff monster/demon hunter. Three drastically different men who can only agree on one thing: making you theirs.

PAIRINGS: Reader x Negan, Reader x Rick Grimes, Reader x Daryl Dixon (Polyamorous Ships)

RATING: Mature/18+/Romance & Smut. Please be prepared and do NOT report.

NOTE: This is actually my first time ever writing an xReader story series as well as writing on Tumblr (I usually only write on Wattpad). As such, it probs won't be perfect though I would SERIOUSLY appreciate your *respectful* feedback and support!

I understand writing xReader content can get a lil tricky, so please just keep in mind that not everything Y/N says or does would be something that you'd do IRL or even approve of. Also, sometimes I may not help but put a teeny bit of myself in Y/N...

Lastly, I recently got back into the TWD fandom after a looong ass time and I'm taking a while re-watching the whole show. So I apologize in advance if my portrayal of any of the characters are rusty or I may not remember too much of the events from the show, but I promise to do my very best and hope y'all enjoy~!! \(^o^)/

DEDICATED TO: The wonderful @blccdyknuckles and @negans-attagirl 💖

"Heavenly Sins"

Part 1

The sounds of laughter and easygoing chatter filled your ears as you walked closer to the church, a light breeze blowing through your F/C floral dress and the sun blinding your eyes. It was Sunday, most residents of the small town of Alexandria having gathered for mass.

It was a day like any other; peaceful and happy, children giggling and chasing each other around as their parents socialized outside before church could start.

Your heels clacking rhythmically on the pavement, you were just about to enter the building before a familiar voice called out.

"Y/N!"

Spinning, a huge smile instantly reached your ears as you saw none other than Carl Grimes waving enthusiastically at you as he jumped out of a car. From the driver's seat, his father soon followed as he stepped out.

Rick Grimes--dedicated sheriff of this fine town. His usual uniform forgone, instead replaced with a casual navy coloured suit. His baby blues met your E/C, flashing you a bright smile of his own that rivalled the sun itself.

Carl was running towards you now, and once in front he gave you a big hug.

"Settle down, cowboy! It's as if you haven't seen me in forever." You chuckled, ruffling Carl's hair affectionately.

"That's 'cause it did feel like forever." Carl pouted, eventually letting go as he looked up at you.

Before you can reply, Rick patted Carl's head and greeted you. "Hey, Y/N. How are things?" He asked in that endearing Southern accent of his.

"Just fine." You nodded, grinning before you couldn't help but let your gaze wander around a bit. "No Judith?"

It was then that Rick's smile faltered, but just barely. You nearly didn't catch it. "No. She's with her mom."

Rick was divorced from his ex-wife, Lori, after he discovered her cheating on him with his also now ex-bestfriend Shane Walsh. After the divorce, Shane and Lori quickly moved to the neighbouring community of Woodbury together and agreed on joint custody of the kids.

It really made your blood boil; you've interacted with Lori only a few times before so you didn't really have much of an opinion on her...that is, until, you learned what had happened between her and Rick. You knew it wasn't any of your business, but you cared about Rick a lot and he sure as hell didn't deserve to get cheated on.

"Oh." Was all you could say, quite stupidly. Your cheeks reddened, mentally slapping yourself before clearing your throat. "Will I see her in the daycare tomorrow, though?" You were a daycare teacher and even though you loved all of the kids, Judith was your favourite. She was simply such a sweetheart.

Rick nodded, his smile softening. "You got it."

You couldn't continue the conversation as the bells rang, making you jump out of your skin. Carl, noticing this, laughed which made you playfully roll your eyes before slinging an arm around him as all of you went inside.

♡♡♡

You took your place near the back of the church with Carl and Rick. Once everyone was settled and done singing, the service began and Father Gabriel stood on top of the podium. A few minutes into his sermon, the interruption of a motorcycle revving loudly outside sliced through the air. Gabriel flinched in surprise, and it was obvious he was desperately trying to keep his cool. Finally, when it was silent again, you found yourself biting back a smile knowing all too well who had caused the ruckus.

It seems Rick knew, too, judging from how his jaw clenched and his hands turned into tight fists.

The doors were thrown open, making Gabriel flinch once more and some of the congregation turning in the pews to look. But poor Gabriel quickly fumbled with his Bible, raising his voice just a tad to regain their attention.

There was a low whistle accompanying the approaching footsteps, but the congregation did their damn hardest to ignore the latest visitor.

"Damn... I assumed the church would be a lot more welcoming than this." A husky voice whispered, and you at last couldn't hold back as a smile broke through.

"Negan." You whispered back, turning slightly in your seat to see he has taken the spot behind you. His leather clad arms lackadaisically resting on your chair, the musky scent of his cologne invading your senses oh so wonderfully. "Fancy seeing you here."

"What? Is it really that surprising, darlin'?" He grinned, presenting a row of perfectly straight white teeth. "I go to church."

"Not all the time." You pointed out.

"Ah..." He chuckled softly, hazel eyes twinkling. "That's 'cause Father Creepy McGee over there is just that. Creepy. As. Shit."

You bit the inside of your cheeks, suppressing your laughter. True, Gabriel did have his moments, but he wasn't that bad. That didn't change the fact that Negan knew exactly how to tickle your funny bone, though.

He was new to Alexandria. It was a lovely town, but since it was relatively small not a lot of people want to move here not unless it was families looking for their children to grow up in a safe environment. Which was why it was quite a shock to find out that a single man like Negan chose this destination, and even more so when he took everyone aback with his infamous pottymouth and rather inappropriate charisma.

He had moved just a couple of houses down from yours, and you made it your mission to befriend him. Right from the get-go, he had piqued your interest and curiousity. He was different from everyone else--even possessing an air of mystery about him--and that definitely intrigued you. And also, perhaps you were just too nice and didn't want him to feel outcasted. Although, that didn't seem like an issue to him at all.

"Want one?" You were brought back to reality when you saw Negan's hand outstretched with a pack of cigarettes.

"Dude, we're in church." You reprimanded, frowning.

Negan didn't say anything, only cocking a brow and still with that same shit-eating grin. You sighed, finally giving in as you swiftly grabbed one and stashed it away in your purse for later.

"Y/N." You turned to the left, Rick's icy gaze piercing you. "Pay attention."

"R-Right. Sorry..." You mumbled sheepishly.

Carl, who was sitting in the middle of you and Rick, had dozed off. Rick nudged him, but the brunette only groaned softly and snuggled into Rick's chest. Defeated, the sheriff sighed and was just about to listen again to Gabriel before Negan cut in.

"Rick!" Negan purposely raised his voice, knowing it would get a rise out of the other man. "Didn't even see ya there. Howdy, cowboy!"

Rick grimaced, and it looked like he was just going to ignore Negan though he knew that if he did that then Negan would just irritate him even further. "Good to see you, Negan." He forced himself to say.

"Only you can say that while giving me such a deadly side eye, Grimes." Negan snickered. "How have you been? How's the wife?"

Rick flushed, his fists in a tight ball again and it looked like his nails would be digging into his skin. You abruptly swung into action, placing a hand on Rick's own.

"Rick..." You said gently. "It's okay. Calm down."

Rick did, his shoulders drooping as if a heavy weight had been lifted. He can barely pay any attention to Gabriel now, then you suddenly stood up and grabbed Negan's arm.

"We need to talk. Now."

"What, we going for a quickie?" Negan smirked, but that soon faded when he saw your serious expression. He sighed dramatically, reaching his full height as he towered over you before following you out.

At this point, you didn't care if people saw what transpired or would even start gossiping. No one, not even Negan, was allowed to harass Rick. He has helped you through so much shit--more than you'd like to admit--and you at least owed him this much.

Once outside, next to where Negan parked his motorcycle, you exploded. "What the fuck is with you?! You leave Rick alone, or I swear to fucking Christ I will--"

"Woah, woah, woah! Hold your horses, missy!" Negan guffawed, his hands up in mock surrender. "I mean, I like 'em feisty, but goddamn! Watch your fucking language."

"Tch. You're one to talk."

"Did you just scoff at me?" He raised his brows, putting his hands in his pockets as he slowly drew closer to you. A devilish grin tugged at the corners of his mouth, tilting his head slightly. "No one's ever fucking scoffed at me and didn't regret it soon after."

You frowned, letting out a huff as you met his gaze challengingly. "As if you'd do anything to me."

He was silent for several moments before chuckling, leaning back against his motorcycle. "You're right. I have too much of a soft spot for ya." He pulled out a cigarette, lighting it then taking a drag. He drew his head upwards, puffing out the smoke. "Whaddya say we just forgive and forget? I truly am sorry. You can even tell Rick that I am metaphorically down on my goddamn knees begging for forgiveness~"

"I'm not forgiving or forgetting anything until you actually face Rick and apologize yourself." You muttered. And without another word, you spun on your heel and strutted back inside the church with your head held high.

Negan's intent stare lingered where your ass had just been, taking another long drag and letting out a small laugh to himself.

His eyes suddenly glowed a crimson red, a smirk playing on his lips.

Oh, he really did pick a GREAT one.

[oh-styles]

Something About a Beginning: Part II

First off, I want to thank each and every one of you for your immense patience. (More so than others, but I digress.) Writing on such topics when you yourself aren’t in the most healthiest mentality is a struggle alone, but we got here. 

Second off, if you haven’t read the first part, you can so here. These chapters implicate bouts of depression and talks of miscarriage, so read at your own will. 

I do want to note that I mention Robin in this story, and I was hesitant to include him because I felt it wasn’t appropriate, because he shouldn’t be used as entertainment purposes (i.e. in stories) but I mention him only with love and respect.

Again, thank you for your patience, and happy reading.

July 3, 2019 London, England

Harry lost his girl.

She vanished in the night – gone with the wind – and all that remained was a ghost of a woman, transparent and bleak. He hasn’t seen her smile since that night, coming close to a week now, and his gut retches at the thought he might never get his girl back.

She’s buried herself in the sheets; the window is opened a crack, and he spots an empty bottle of melatonin laying overturned on her bedside table. He stares intently at her body, watching as the sheets rise and fall to the pattern of her placid breathing, and he thinks for a moment that she’s finally found herself a better place. Not dead—not by any means. Whatever dream world she has found herself delved in, he knows she might have found a sliver of peace there, hopefully smiling.

“She’s sleeping, mum.” Harry says into his phone, taking a step back to gently close the bedroom door. “Rande and Cindy invited us to Muskoka but…” His words hung in the air, like the elephant in the room, but his mother knew all too well what was lingering on the precipice of her sons’ tongue.

But she’s too depressed.

But she can’t go a day without crying.

But I don’t think she has the energy to leave the house.

It’s been four days since the attack, and Harry hasn’t seen her take a step outside of their bedroom.

“Love, she’s wasting away in there. It might help her a little to get out, get some sun…”

“Mum, I can’t even get her to sit in the fucking garden.” He can hear his mother’s nettled sigh on the other end of the line, but how can anyone expect him to put her on a mother fucking airplane if she can’t even bother to walk the 30 meters to the fucking garden? “The sodding paps were outside the house last night.”

“They can’t—”

“I’m aware.” He begins to descend his way down the stairs, stopping to peer out from the front window – an old, worn out habit. “I think it’s best we get away for a bit. The story hasn’t died down… I think it’ll help—getting away. They won’t bother us there.”

Harry knew your answer before he even had the chance to ask; he knew he was wasting his time in even suggesting such a thing, but the guilt would eat away at him if he didn’t even try.

“Muskoka…Canada, remember? We went there last year.” He sat at the edge of the bed, running a hand over the sheets where a peek of your shoulder laid exposed. “It’ll be quiet. Nobody there to bug us. If you want to just hang out in the hotel room the whole time, I’d be fine with that. It’s just…”

I can’t stand to see you burrowed away another day.

“I’m really worried about you… I’m just trying to help.” He was powerless, and he knew it. He couldn’t take her by the arm and force her on a plane, but god forbid he try his damned hardest. “No paps, nobody. I promise. I wouldn’t take you there if it wasn’t safe.”

He feels a stir beneath him, and from underneath the covers, a small hand inches outward and lays upward, a silent plea for intimacy—a piece of familiarity he hasn’t touched in days. He reaches out and clasps her hand in his, and readjusts himself to lay beside her.

“You can think about it. I don’t need an answer this second, but give it a day or two, okay?”

He sees her nod, and her eyes blink open to meet his, only for a second, before they are closed once again for the remainder of the night.

*

July 6, 2019 Ontario, Canada

Muskoka came and went. Nothing advantageous to really capture your attention, though you kept your head nestled low in a book for most of your stay. You tossed a couple Stephen King novels into your bags without much thought, and by the time your trip was coming to an end, you had already completed one and started another.

A photo made its rounds online of you at dinner with Harry, Rande and Cindy, and even thinking back to that night, you couldn’t recount a time where you felt a pair of eyes boring at your table. You think it might be because you paid more attention to the drink menu than your friends, but you digressed. They only saw the back of your head, and not even the photographer mentioned you. You were also mistaken for Kaia on a couple occasions.

After Muskoka, you were back in London, and not much later Harry would be jetting off to Italy for Google Camp, and a few days after that, he was set to fly to Mexico for a video shoot. He was redundant to go, and even called Jeff to see if they could reschedule, but that would cause a delay for the next video they’d film only a week later. He asked if you wanted to join him, and you kindly declined. You were much aware of his past video sets, and how common it was to see photos and videos leaked online, and you were far from interested to be included.

You were much happier to find yourself under the watchful eyes of Anne Twist.

“I can meet you in Scotland if I’m feeling up to it.” You knew it was a scorching lie crawling right off your tongue, but if it meant he carried some hope with him, then you would feed him whatever white lies you could muster. Even Anne knew better than to believe you.

“I think Canada was good for you, love, but you need some rest, too. Can’t be travelling all over the bloody world, now, can you?”

It was a nice feeling to know she had your back.

In another life would a little green monster be envious of missing such a trip to Cancun, but the only desires you had were sitting in Anne’s garden being force fed a steady cup a tea and a plate of biscuits.

Anne didn’t pry; she knew well what you needed, but she would be keeping her sons promise on keeping you safe, and she knew there was no safer place for you to be.

It was August now, and the heat felt suffocating. You and Anne spent your mornings walking to the bakery her son once worked in, grabbing a quick breakfast before heading to the park. You would pick off pieces of your croissant and toss it at the squirrels, but you almost always scared them off. Anne told stories of when Harry was a child, and how he once tried to tell her Gemma was a drug dealer.

“She was only a child,” she hummed, laughing into her coffee. “But he was always a character to have around.”

“I feel like…between you and me, right?” You could hear in the distance the sound of a goose honking and a group of children wailing, running away. “I just…don’t want to upset him.”

Anne reached over and took your hand in hers. “Anything you say is always safe with me, love.”

“I’m mad he left me here.” There was a short beat, but you could feel your throat close, and that anger begin to well up in your chest. “This…this is also…”

“I know, love.” She scooted closer, squeezing your hand. “Everyone has their own ways of dealing with grief. Harry isn’t good at sitting around… Even when Robin passed, he didn’t like to sit. He needed to go do something.”

You remember, and yet you still recall him lying on his mother’s couch in tears. You don’t think he’s cried since the two of you left the hospital a couple weeks ago.

“He loves you, darling. He calls me every day to check in on you. Don’t think for a second he doesn’t care.”

Even with her words, you felt something was missing.

*

Harry was only in Scotland for a couple days before he was finally home, but it wouldn’t be long before he would be venturing off to Italy – again – for another work-related conquest. You weren’t sure why he was so content with country hopping every couple of weeks instead of resting at home with you, but you didn’t bother bludgeoning him with questions.

“After I’m through with Italy—I won’t even be there a day—I’ll be back home, but a couple weeks later, I have to go to LA for some meetings… I’d like you to come, if that’s okay.”

Again. There’s always something. It must be so fucking difficult to stay in one place for more than a couple weeks with your grieving girlfriend.

“Also…I was meaning to ask you. Ariana is in town in a few days… Wanted to know if you wanted to come with me and the guys… I think it’ll be fun.”

“Your child died a month ago and you want to go to a fucking Ariana Grande concert.” The words fell helplessly from you, but it was weeks of anguish and neglect that hit its final tier, and you were quite tired of hanging on. “Tell me….how does that make sense to you?”

“Excuse me?” For the first time that night, he looked at you. All before, he found excuses to shift his glances to anything but you, maybe in fear of reality finally hitting him in the face with what he’s been running from for weeks, but for the first time that night, he bared his eyes down at you, and his mouth fell open.

“I’m sorry—have I been hallucinating you just picking your shit up and leaving every chance you get?”

“I’ve had work—” He took to his feet, swiftly flinging his hand out to close the lid of his luggage.

“Any normal person—I swear, any normal person would stay home, and fucking grieve, except you, who wants to fucking fly everywhere and work, because that would require facing his fucking prob—”

“I have a job—I know it’s hard for you to relate to that, but I have commitments—”

“And what am I then? If not a commitment, then what, Harry?”

“You are a commitment—”

“Then where have you been? Why have I been staying with your mother? I know you invited me to go with you, but I shouldn’t have to. I’m fucking hurting, Harry! I don’t want to go to Cancun and Italy—I want to be here with you. Do you know how fucking hard it’s been dealing with this without you here?”

For once, he was silent, but he shifted on his feet.

“You haven’t cried. Not since the hospital. I can’t count how many times I’ve cried, and you sit around texting your band or going to video shoots… If you feel nothing—no grief or anything…if you didn’t even want the baby, just tell me. Make this easier on me, please.”

“How the fuck can you say that I didn’t want the baby? My heart is fucking hurt!”

“Then act like it!”

“You really think I can sit around every day and watch you fall apart? I have to be the strong one… If it can’t be you, then it has to be me, and I don’t like watching you hurt.”

“You know…you sometimes have a really shitty way showing people you care about them.”

You stood there, arms folded in resistance, and he couldn’t take his eyes from off the floor. He felt cornered, and he was defenseless with nothing else left to give. His bags still laid on the bed, clothes scattered over the sheets ready to be put up, and you knew this room was no place for you. Your purse was downstairs, and your phone in your pocket.

“I’m going to stay with Gemma tonight. I’ll have her pick me up. Please don’t follow me out.” 

*

She’s always been the quiet one.

The first time she met you, at a family gathering you were reluctant to attend despite the persistent reassurance from your other half, she knew from the moment she saw you that you were different from all the others. You held yourself different, much shorter, like you knew you could never become the center of attention.

You studied the room, holding onto Harry’s hand as he introduced you to his mother, and that’s when Gemma appeared from over her mother’s shoulder.

“About time I meet you,” she chuckled, reaching her hand out. “I’m Gemma.”

She watches you now from the edge of the driveway, sitting on the steps of the porch with only the light above you illuminating your surroundings. From behind you, she spotted the silhouette of her brother peeking through the curtains, keeping a close eye for just in case.

Your track record wasn’t a good one.

As she approaches, you perk your head up with a sigh of relief. For the first time, she was the Styles you nothing but needed.

“Come on, Magoo,” she chirps as she finally reaches you, lifting her hand out for you to take. “We can hit the McDonald’s drive-thru.”

Laura Nyro played over her car stereo, a melodious tune you recall hearing once before on a long drive in Cheshire. You shut your eyes, and the memory floods you like a storm, like a stampede parading across your chest, and you lean over to rest your head on the window.

Gemma reached her hand over to find yours, giving it three squeezes of solace.

I. Love. You.

The cut that was tucked away in your hairline was in its last stages of healing, and a scar would most certainly take its place. You always felt the erratic throbbing, like a little reminder that no matter how far you run, your problems will always be chasing you like the devil.

“Did I make a mistake?”

Gemma turned her attention from the road, lifting your hand up with hers, and planting a soft kiss to your knuckles.

“No, Magoo. I’m sorry to tell you, but you’re dating a dumbass.” She heard a muted hum in response. “Nobody is perfect… Not even that shithead. I can see where he thought what he was doing was okay, because he was sacrificing his feelings for you, but… that’s just not how you do it.”

You could drink to that.

Gemma spotted the golden arches and took a left at the light. “I’m glad you texted me… Haven’t had a bloody girl’s night in ages. It sucks under the circumstances but…” She turned back to you with a wink. “I’ll take what I can get.”

On the journey back to her flat, you pleasantly sipped at your chocolate milkshake and tapped your feet to the music, and even sporadically hummed along to the few chords you knew. It really didn’t take much to please you.

Gemma was never gifted a sister as a child. Though, she did want one, and was thoroughly distraught when her mother brought home a brother all those years ago, she did grow accustomed and grew to love the curly haired boy who she would then share with the world. But the girl beside her, who slurped her drink and choked behind a laugh of a joke about a time traveler who walks into a bar, had burrowed herself deep within her heart, much like she does with any counterpart she meets.

It’s incredibly difficult not to meet this girl and not hold some sort of placement in her life. Her heart is massive, but the love she radiates is gracious and touches anyone who dares get too close.

And the love Gemma has for her is just as the same.

Michal was asleep when the two of you arrived; you knew your way around, and confidently walked to the spare room down the hall, last door on the right. Gemma trailed behind you, holding your milkshake as you flipped on the light, and kicked off your shoes.

Olivia was already sprawled out over the comforter.

“Could you stay with me, tonight?”

“You don’t have to ask me twice, babe.” Gemma smirked, setting your drink down on the bedside table. “Have you ate?”

You shook your head, even trying to recall if you had mustered an appetite to have some breakfast, but even then you think you took a couple bites out of an apple and forgot about it.

“I’ll make you something—actually, Michal and I have spinach ravioli left over… Want me to heat some of that up for you?”

You graciously nodded. “You’re too good for me.”

“I just love you is all.”

The next morning, the spot beside you was visibly vacant, and from down the hall you could vaguely hear a low, sullen voice talking over the sound of the television. Gemma fired back in response, and from your feet, Olivia peeked her head from the covers, turning towards the disrupting noise.

“Let her sleep—she’s exhausted—”

“Just give me five bloody minutes!”

You knew any chance of sleep you wish you had was far gone.

“I’m up—just fucking talk!” You hollered into your pillow, your eyes still adjusting to the sunlight cascading into the room. You could guess it wasn’t any later than nine that morning, and before you had a moment to check, his unquestionable footsteps neared your door, and you heard a light tap. “I’m obviously awake.”

After you walked out the night before, he ignored your wishes and followed you downstairs where the shortest reaction he got from you was the front door slamming in his face.

“Can I talk?”

I don’t know, can you?

“You literally came here and woke me up from some incredible sleep, mind you, and you’re asking me if you can talk.” He was in a blind panic and darted his eyes around the room. “Well, talk.”

“I’m a fucking twat, I know this. It’s inexcusable what I did—what I put you through—it was selfish—I’m so fucking selfish—I can’t fucking deal with this kind of stuff, and I’m a bloody twat for leaving you because I can’t handle it. It’s cowar—I’m a coward! I can’t face shit—and I love you so much, and I left you… I’m so sorry, please believe me. I’m such a twat—"

“Shut up, please—you’re giving me a migraine.” You held up a single finger as you adjusted yourself in bed. “Look, I don’t even know how early it is, and you know how much I hate mornings.”

“I know, but…I didn’t want to wait until the afternoon to talk to you.”

“That’s fair.”

“It’s 10:30 by the way.”

“Did you practice that speech in your car, or did you just wing it?”

While you were in bed with Gemma, watching King of the Hill on her iPad, Harry resided to his office where he spent much of the evening hunched over his journal, scrawling out endless messages to you about how much of a wanker he is, and by the time the sun began to rise, he had his eyes in his hand and began waiting for an appropriate time to come and see you.

“I…thought a little bit about it, yeah.”

“You really hurt me, alright? It’s not something I can just forget because you said you were sorry. When I needed you the most, you weren’t there. What kind of partner is that?” He stood silent in his spot; his hands dug deep into his trousers. Suddenly, he was a little boy again getting scolded by his mother. “I had your mom, I had Gemma, but not you. The only person I needed. I get this wasn’t part of the plan, and we got our hearts broken, but that doesn’t give you the right to run off because you can’t handle seeing me upset.”

Olivia stretched her limbs out over the covers, purring against the sheets.

“I appreciate you coming, I really do. This isn’t something I can just forget and move on from. I want to work on this, but it’s going to take time… I still love you though.”

*

September 19, 2019 Los Angeles, California

“Your shirt looks like amebae under a microscope.”

He stifled a grunt, looking down at his shirt with concentration, and every so subtly did you see him glance swiftly at the bathroom mirror. “I’m surprised you even know what ameba are.”

“Or it looks like those eye floaties you get, but…colorful, you know?”

“Will you stop bullying me?”

“Only when you tell me how much you paid for that shirt.”

For a second, and you saw it flash through his eyes, he considered telling you, but figured that was a fight for a different afternoon. His silence was all the answer you needed. You nodded and left the room.

He found himself eminently lucky that you even agreed to accompany him to Los Angeles, but it was under the one condition that he takes you to In-N-Out whenever you oh so politely asked. Though, after you harassed him over his attire that morning, he was undecided to change his mind.

He didn’t.

You did, however, apologize and say he looked like a sexy ameba, and he then locked you out of the car for five minutes.

To be fair, you only accepted his offer to travel with him because you missed your friends, and they were the one thing that remained untouched from the summer. You felt the emptiness being carried with you with every passing day, and all the books and websites said that was normal, but finding distractions and hobbies to pass the time was coming close to becoming a sport – way too laborious for you.

You even found yourself searching “Losing interest in things I used to like” and you were considerably shocked to discover the rabbit hole Google led you down.

You didn’t consider yourself depressed, not by any means. Sure, you were sad most of the day, you never really gained your appetite back, you stopped painting and watching King of the Hill and Breaking Bad, and if you didn’t spend the entire day sleeping, you would lay in bed with your eyes closed, praying you would eventually grow tired enough to slip away for a little while.

Harry even signed you both up for couple’s therapy.

“This is for people who cheated on each other and refuse to break up!”

But regardless of your inherent fussing, he refused to back down. Where the two of you stood mentally, this was your last chance at redemption, and he wasn’t letting you back out. The way he saw it, if you didn’t make an effort to try and fix what was broken, there was no hope for the relationship moving forward.

That was when you realized the outcome was more than just losing your baby.

After the first session, you made an appointment with your physician, who later prescribed not only you with anti-depressants, but Harry as well. Your world was spinning madly, in every which direction, but at least you had your boy holding on madly with you.

The first time you encountered a fan since the summer happened on that very first outing in Los Angeles when you and Harry were arriving for your lunch plans. (Not In-N-Out, but you let it go.) If it had been solely one girl, you trust that you could easily fight her off if given the opportunity. I mean, sure, you didn’t fight off that other girl, but she had the upper hand, or so you tell yourself.  

But, no, she was with a group, and you felt the urge to vomit.

“I’m going to throw up—” You propel yourself in the other direction, ready to sprint back to the parking lot, and thinking back on it now, you can’t even remember the last time you even sprinted. “Let me sit in the car—let’s get the food to go—I don’t care—”

This is why we should have fucking gone to In-N-Out.

“Pet—you can’t run forever, okay? I know it’s fucking scary, but you have to face this one day.” You remember the exact quote Harry was reciting from the therapist, just with less profanity. “I won’t let them do shit, alright?”

They did stop him, of course, and you took a few steps away so they could have their moment, but you made sure he was still an arm grab away incase—

“Hey,” You had disregarded the voice, opening a game on your phone – Numberzilla – before you registered someone had spoken to you. “I’m sorry to bother you…”

At first glance, you could easily discern she was unsure of herself. She likely had a rush of confidence, and now standing blankly in front of you, she has lost all certainty. From behind, you peered up to find Harry staring at the back of her head, already inching into his pocket for his keys.

“Oh,” you gulp, clutching your phone in your hands. “Hi…”

“I just…was just hoping that you were doing okay.”

Doing okay, because of—

Your heart thudded to a stop.

“You alright?” Harry was at your side, and the young girl took a step back.

“Sorry—I’m sorry.” She gave a weak smile. “I just wish the best for you two.”

She was already walking off when you mustered up the words to thank her, but you were doubtful she heard you. Harry’s arm was in a tight grip around your backside, with his keys hung in his hand, ready to run.

The two of you cancelled your lunch plans and hit In-N-Out instead.

*

September 24, 2019 Los Angeles, California

“Is it okay?”

It was a Tuesday; you had a clear agenda for the day, and it was a little after lunch that you found yourself aimlessly clicking through channels, with your boyfriend sitting down by your feet, flipping through the pages of your current read.

You had felt the undeniable ache since the night before, and you thought maybe if you just ignore it, it’ll go away, but it only lingered, taunting you with its insatiable lust.

The itch you don’t want to scratch.

Your heart was racing, your palms were sweaty, and it didn’t matter how tightly you squeezed your legs together, nothing could rid you of this.

“H,” You poked his leg with your toe. “Bear with me on this, okay?” He didn’t respond, but he carefully set your book back down on the coffee table. “Will you have sex with me real quick?”

“I…you want to?”

“Do you have condoms? Because if not, I can take care of this myself—”

“Yes, yes, I have them. I have—they’re upstairs.”

And there you were, minutes later, his cock was inside of you, and he slowly rolled his hips carefully into you, dipping his toes into the water. He physically cannot express how much this meant to him, and how long he hid this desire deep in his gut, because God forbid he be the one to bring it up. If he had to wank off in the bathroom in between commercial breaks until you decided you were ready to have sex again, he’d find a way to tolerate it.

“Is it okay?” He choked out in between breaths; only minutes in, and he was cradling dangerously on the edge.

“Yeah—yeah, it’s okay. It feels good.” You readjusted your hips, stretching your leg out to wrap around his. “Maybe a little faster?”

“I’ll cum in a second—” He shook his head, halting his movements when that tiny, little knot inched closer to unravelling. “Just give me a sec.”

“Babe—”

“Hold—” He reached his arm under the bend of your knee, lifting it up as he thrusted back into you. “Fuck—”

He was relentless; you stretched your hand down between your thighs, rubbing and kneading that small bundle of nerves as his cock hit deep within you with no sign of letting up.

It had been way too long.

“Harry—fuck—” It was deep, pulsating, and you lifted your hips up as your orgasm radiated throughout your every limb, tightening around his cock as he thrusted hard, giving you one last nudge of pleasure as his grip tightened around the sheets, fucking into you with a lasting, animalistic moan, cumming thick ropes into you.

You made him access the condom, triple checking there wasn’t a hole unbeknownst to either of you, and after a fourth overview, he politely asked you if he could throw away his used condom now.

You would be okay this time.

He ran a bath a little later, and you submerged your body deep within the bubbles, letting them rest at your jawline. You felt like you lost your virginity all over again.

“H?” You asked, rubbing the bubbles up your arm.

“Yes, pet?”

“Do you want to get married?”

The question caught him, and he cracked his eyes open with curiosity. “I want to, yeah. You know I do.”

The conversation had only been passed around once, when you were terribly drunk and crying over some sob film where the boyfriend dies before they have a chance to elope despite their parent’s protests. The film stuck with you for weeks, and you always wondered, if you knew you were with the one, why wait? Why wait for tragedy to strike?

“Let’s get married.”

He chuckled, wiggling his toes against yours. “You’re mental.”

“No, I’m serious. Why wait? Seriously? I love you, you love me, and we aren’t getting any younger.”

“Pet, you’re 24.”

“And only getting older!”

“So, you want to find some Little White Chapel in Vegas and get hitched?” He leaned up a little, a smirk stretching out on his face.

“I want a real wedding, of course, someday, but right now…let’s do it. Let’s go to Vegas or Miami or somewhere, and just do it.”

It took an hour, but he eventually agreed, and was on the phone with Jeff to arrange a flight and hotel. The next day, the two of you ran around downtown to every consignment shop in the city, looking for a white dress – not as hard as you thought it would be – a diamond ring – a little tough, but you found one for cheap – and a nice pair of heels in your size – a lot harder; you bought a size too big by accident.

And in 24 hours, you would be marrying your best friend.

*

Miami, FL September 26, 2019

“Shit…fuck, we’re actually doing this?” You stuffed a wad of tissue paper into the toe box of your heels – one size too big – and stood up to test them for a final time. “No going back?”

“Cold feet, pet?”

“No, I’m fucking—it’s humid in here.” You swing around to face him, fanning yourself off with a loose People magazine, and its then you see him standing smugly in his slacks, a proper grin etching itself across his face.

“Cold feet—the expression, pet…”

“Harry—fuck, I’m nervous. My shoes are too big, I feel a pimple forming on my chin, and I’m pretty sure the wire in my bra broke ten minutes ago because something is stabbing my tit.”

“Well, I think your tits look great.”

“You can thank that bombshell bra I bought years ago for that.” You stroll back over to the sofa and toss the magazine carelessly onto the coffee table. “Did you have them sign an MDMA?”

“NDA, and Jeff got that covered.” Harry combs back a piece of his hair, that one strand that always gives him trouble. “Hold onto this for me?” You watch as he removes his H ring, and strolls over to the sofa. “Put it in your bra—can’t lose much in there.”

“You’re hilarious.”

“And you’re my wife.” His fucking smug grin falls over him like a tidal wave, and you wish you could just slap it right off his face.

“No, I’m not.”  

“Give it a couple minutes.”

Your heart hurled itself up into your esophagus, the tremorous pounding radiating all throughout your head to your toes. Harry appeared quite relaxed as he staggered to the full-length mirror to adjust his collar, and from the reflection, he caught your watchful stare.

“Your mom is going to be pissed.” You think back to Anne, and all the good she’s done for you, and you are now repaying her by having her miss her son’s wedding. “We’ll need to plan the real thing soon.”

“We’ll tell her when we want to tell her, but for now,” he swung around on his heel to face you, “This is about you and me…and the rest of our lives.”

You make a mental note to thank Niall later.

You think back to those years ago, and how you almost bailed on Niall that night to stay home and watch The Young and the Restless with your roommate. You weren’t thrilled to get that phone call, but as long as Niall agreed to pay for a couple drinks, you found it in yourself to put on a pair of pants and enjoy a night out. 

And maybe if you had inclined to stay home, your entire life would be a completely different world right now. Maybe you’d be in somebody else’s kitchen helping them prepare dinner, or on some lavish vacation with a guy you only met a month ago, or maybe you’d be alone in your apartment, binging a new show to pass the time you only let flutter by.

But you were here now, standing at an alter that smelled roughly of cigarettes and mildew, wearing shoes that were too big on you, in a dress that probably saw more weddings than you ever will, holding the hands of the man you were prepared to love for the rest of your life.

Nothing seemed to matter anymore, not the harassing, not the attack, not the stalking. It didn’t matter what anybody threw at you anymore; you were hard as fucking stone, and not a single person was going to damage what the two of you were building.

“You may now kiss your bride.”