#a menacing Greg lol
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onemetricdylan · 1 year ago
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I moved north this season and the cold weather has been a nice change. Struggled with this one but I'm happy with the results
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a-shade-of-green · 3 months ago
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mike and jane as wirt and greg in Over the Garden Wall :)
(AKA my mediocre drawing skills meet my just okay writing skills)
The Loveliest Lies of All, my stranger things x over the garden wall fusion is up on ao3 now! happy early halloween!
here's a summary for everyone that missed it lol:
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Mike Wheeler and his best friend, Jane Hopper, find themselves lost in the middle of a winding wooded realm known as the Unknown— a fantastical reflection of the world they call home. With the help of individuals vaguely familiar to them, their trip home begins. Lurking in the woods, though, is a menacing sentient shadow that will do anything to prevent their return… 
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hope to see you there! read it here: The Loveliest Lies of All
happy october!
love,
ashadeofgreen
(p.s. be on the lookout for my next halloween special next week!)
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fadinglights · 5 months ago
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like for a starter from the muses below! could be based on your wishlist or any of the wanted plots if they catch your eye :>
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anthony lee — 28, medium/baker, bisexual, fc: greg hsu
maybe a muse who's a regular/co-worker with a crush on him?
someone he used to know before he dropped out of med school
maybe they're exes.... kind of the power couple back then that people thought were going to places but neither of their lives turned out as expected
ghost in his apartment/cafe or anything supernatural!
he's brought to a blind date gathering thingy as his friend's support animal and oh wow actually glad he's here cause it's how he met your muse who's maybe a bit jaded in love but hit the jackpot with him (they both did) </3
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koji tanaka — 28, filmaker, bisexual, fc: mackenyu arata
maybe he's dating/sleeping with someone who he's working with? an actor/actress/screenwriter etc... it's a mess
friends with benefits situation
fake dating plot except he's the worst person to ask lmao
the one where he's accidentally the third person in a relationship... oops
kind of feel like a throuple plot would kinda suit him idk
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hyeon joonwoo — 24, professional figure skater, homosexual, fc: sung hanbin
someone he trains with (he's in the olympics team)... could be besties/rivals/rivals to lovers <3
alternatively someone he works with, maybe a physiotherapist or something
celeb/non-celeb plot, his schedule/the long distance getting in the way
someone he met and fell for in another country (could be another athlete/anyone), could be oblivious about his job until they see them on tv lol
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elodie yoon — 25, designer/mafia heiress, bisexual, fc: kim yoojung
'i'm your ex and once i got into a near-death situation with criminals and they left me alone cause i'm in your protection list???? explain'
best friends to lovers, your muse could be from a family of crime too or works for hers
rivals to best friends to lovers.... give me children of rivaling families who fall in love and say fuck it...
bodyguard/protectee plot because yes (warning she's a menace)
a partner unaware of her background, until that one time they have to suddenly start running for their lives on a cute date????
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leah willems — 30, er doctor, bisexual, fc: davika hoorne
something something spicy with a colleague (doctor, nurse, therapist etc)... in my medical drama era tbh
they're in a perfect marriage except it's falling apart and maybe your muse is cheating and regretting it when she finds out </3 maybe they even work in the same hospital gASP
your muse is the barista of the coffee shop she always goes to for her caffeine fix but she fell off the radar for a while and your muse is lowkey worried????
our muses used to date in high school, were the power couple and broke up due to long distance? now they meet again years later, maybe in her er or a reunion event idk
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jules kwang — 26, makeup artist, bisexual, fc: roseanne park
she's on a dating show (kind of like the boyfriends but maybe it not just guys lol, or single's inferno) except she's a jaded skeptic and only here for the free vacation <3
could be combined with the first one, a hopeless romantic/skeptic golden retriever/black cat dynamic
she's dating a client/someone she worked for, someone from the world of fame and it gets messy
someone she's collabing with for a youtube video for her makeup channel, cute chemistry ensues and maybe fans are begging for more collabs and lowkey wish they'd date <3
something slightly forbidden like her brother's best friend or she's your muse's sibling's best friend sth... if it's the latter the best friend probably thinks they shouldn't date her just to avoid getting their heart broken lmaoooo
a before sunrise kind of plot idk
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intermundia · 11 months ago
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Hey, I'm new to the Star Wars fandom here (TT) and I am an avid reader, can you suggest what books I should buy and in what order because u seem like a pretty well organized guy in terms of books, thanks (plz help, I will literally go broke if I buy them all, thanks)
welcome to star wars!!! 🫶 it's a hell of a mess but it's worth it haha i've been collecting for awhile, i have 173 of the novels (here's a link to an inventory spreadsheet if you're curious which ones), but there are almost four hundred available if you include all legends and extended universe in addition to disney canon. which is frankly too many lol
a useful book is the essential reader's companion by pablo hidalgo, which was published in 2012 and provides short summaries of all novels published before then, so you have a sense of what kind of books are available about the EU etc. it's good to have on hand to guide you through the absolute thicket that is legends haha
my personal area of interest is the prequels and obi-wan/anakin, so those are the books i really know the most about. the thrawn books by timothy zahn are notoriously pretty good for example, but i've only read one of them, and can't really comment on the rest. i've also only read one high republic book, light of the jedi by charles soule, which i adored, but can't comment on the rest of that era either.
my three very favorite sw books are:
revenge of the sith by matthew stover
darth plagueis by james luceno
rogue planet by greg bear
a selection of other ones i enjoyed:
padawan by kiersten white
wild space by karen miller
phantom menace by terry brooks
shatterpoint by matthew stover
labyrinth of evil by james luceno
dark lord: rise of darth vader by james luceno
lords of the sith by paul kemp
master and apprentice by claudia gray
dark disciple by christie golden
kenobi by john jackson miller
life and legend of obi-wan kenobi and the rise and fall of darth vader by ryder windham are two kids books that i really enjoyed
if you want to know comics (which are some of the best star wars media of all time) or my favorite nonfiction reference books let me know!!
also, a pro tip i guess is to check out ebay used book lots, people dump big piles of sw books all the time for relatively cheap and that can be a great way to jumpstart a collection without breaking the bank
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idsfantasy · 1 year ago
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Honestly, I don't like the theory that Gregory is patient 46,I think it's not only destroying Gregory's character development, but also wasting patient 46's character potential,Patient 46 could be a cooler, more menacing villain, but right now he or she just another glitchtrap victim,I mean, what does this story tell us? Our protagonist, a young boy who is actually a killer, was controlled by a virus, but somehow escaped control and lost all his memory。
Tbh at this point it's not so much a theory as it is Tales from the Pizzaplex has a character named Greg described as looking like Gregory and associated with the letters GGY on the arcade cabinets who is also Patient 46, though possibly in a slightly different way than the games (I doubt Vanessa was going to a school counselor's office and it's implied 46 and Vanessa were going to the same location).
But yeah, the story tells us that Gregory used to be controlled by Glitchtrap, which can sorta give reason for why Vanny and Glitchtrap are so bent on capturing him. I think it helps pull the story together in an interesting way, but I understand it's not everyone's preference lol
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shsl-heck · 2 years ago
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Pale Live Read Part 3. Stolen Away
After like 10 days I’m finally posting this! The arc was great I just got distracted and didn’t start reading it until a couple days ago, then it turned out I had a lot of thoughts. Once again  warning for heavy Pact spoilers since my thoughts are heavily influenced by reading it before this.
Greg isn't in their class anymore and no one seems to remember him. So presumably the choir severed his connections to everyone not at the ritual location. Very Urr adjacent feeling. This is definitely something I can see being listed alongside Corvidae as an Other people assumed was a demon at first. I'm 99% sure it's not though. It seems to lack the ambient corrupting effect they have.
The fact that Lucy used to blame herself for all the problems in her life but now chooses to get angry and do something about it is interesting to me. I'd argue that it's honestly healthier to get mad like that than to wallow in self loathing like Avery does. Lucy is giving off very much an "if there can be no victory then I will fight forever", or even an  "I had to try" vibe if we want to tie it into a certain other web serial. 
Verona's dad continues to be the worst. Acting like that because your daughter forgot and didn't get you a birthday gift is just beyond my comprehension. Like I get he's got his own issues but Jesus christ, he needs to put on a brave face and do what has to be done for his daughter's sake. This is like peak parentification.
On a much lighter note I love these girls' friendship. It's so nice to read a Wildbow story where the central characters like each other and aren't constantly destroying every relationship in their life.
They used to do a similar fake nation project at my school in geography class. Not really relevant to anything but I thought that was neat.
I really like Reagan. Hopefully she doesn't get killed or worse by the Choir, and I doubt she's Innocent anymore, so it might be interesting (and not too karmically costly) for the girls to send her in the direction of the magic school Miss mentioned. She'd make a good practitioner I think. 
Okay now Lucy is distrusting Verona because she's talking to Miss on her own. This is closer to the Wildbow protags I'm used to lol.
They're going to see the faerie! I'm sure this will end well for them. In all seriousness though, after The Girl in the Checkered Scarf's interlude from Pact I'm a bit nervous about long term consequences. If anyone can weasel out of the oath at the awakening ceremony it's probably a faerie. 
Just noticed the name of this arc which makes going to see Faeries even more ominous.
I know I just talked about them being dangerous but Marcica and Guilherme are delightful. The exiled faerie of Jacob's Bell were obviously a little menacing, but the two in Kennet have a great little Odd Couple dynamic going on here that makes them seem less threatening. That just makes them more dangerous though.
Marcica is being more generous than I'm comfortable with. The gifts are uh, of varying quality levels but it's still a lot. Verona's is especially worrying given she already wants to become something other than human.
Alpeana lives with the two fae? I desperately need a version of Pale that's just a sitcom about these three being roommates.
Marcica's interaction with Avery here, teaching her to use glamor, is actually a very nice moment. Her sharing her thoughts on gender and expression while basically doing Avery's makeup really feels very intimate. We know there's a trick here, but I can't fault Avery for falling for it. The way Marcica advises her to just go with what happens and work with instead of against the glamor also explains why her court loses the least to Winter. Presumably immortality is less miserable if you're willing to play along and just accept things.
I don't know if I like what Avery is doing with Pam here. She's like 12 so I get that these things have not occurred to her but it's a little creepy, and the kind of thing that could come with long term consequences. Pamela already has a bunch of self esteem issues and I can easily see her questioning the "why" here as time goes on.
Lucy maintaining her appearance out of spite feels like something that could easily become super self destructive. I also feel the need to point out that it's not actually that different from if she went the route Avery is and blamed herself. In that case it would be her fault she was ranked last, and so she has to try harder to be likable and attractive. Instead she decides to say fuck them (which I again think is a good idea), but she still ends up trying to improve her appearance to prove them wrong. It's the same end result, just different justifications! I don't think Lucy has let go of who she used to be as much as she likes to think she has. 
Her family dynamic is really interesting too. Aunt Heather gets introduced and I actually like her a lot. Of the three girls she seems to have the best home life but that says more about how bad their situations are than anything about Lucy's. I really want this to work out but I'm not optimistic about the chances. I'm even less optimistic about whatever went down with this Paul guy. Presumably he's the reason Lucy's mom was so devastated that one night.
Okay I know they saw a classmate maybe die, and John pulled a gun on them but so far these girls have had it pretty easy when it comes to dealing with the practice. Because of that I think it's easy for Avery and Verona to not realize the risks they're taking, or that this relative safety won't always be guaranteed. Lucy seems to understand a little better in terms of the harm the Faerie might do to Pamela, but doesn't seem to put together that one of them pretending to be Kell would also turn Avery saying "you won't see this face around here again" into a lie. Right now the Others of Kennet can't hurt them directly, but none of them, not even Lucy seem to realize what they're messing with, or that the training wheels are still on. Just compare their uses of glamor to Blake's. Verona turned into a mink and snuggled, and Avery had a weird pseudo date. Blake broke into the house of a rival family in order to stop a ritual targeting him and barely managed to get out by disguising himself as a child and working around the no lying rule in clever ways after he stopped them by calling 911 instead of using Practice. Both of these are very early in the story and really demonstrate how disconnected the girls are from the very real danger Others and Practitioners can bring. 
That was a long tangent but uh suffice it to say that Lucy is right about Avery and Verona needing to think more. Lucy may honestly be underselling it a little by accident (not that that would be her fault). 
Lucy is absolutely not over blaming herself after seeing this conversation with Paul. It's heart wrenching to see her like this, and even worse when you realize how long she's had to hold onto all of this. The worst part though is that seemingly all of what she said was true, or true enough for the spirits at least. I sincerely hope Paul gets hit hard by that curse.
Ms Hardy is weird. Maybe this is a cultural thing but her not wanting to talk privately with Avery because that would be crossing a personal boundary is more than a little ridiculous. Like you as a middle school teacher are there to help your students learn and grow during one of the most complicated times in their lives, and a student privately asking you for advice about something is in no way a violation of your professional ethics. If you personally don't feel comfortable engaging with kids one on one when they have issues then you should have a different job. Honestly, bringing up the possibility of having another teacher, or even worse, other students (especially when you already know their home life is not great and they have a history of being ignored and emotionally neglected) is far more of a potential violation of the trust put in you. I've just gotten more fired up as I wrote this section so honestly I'd like to formally say fuck Ms Harding. Is this a common opinion? Or am I going to start disc horse by saying this?
Sheridan and Avery's conversation was nice. It really captured a certain type of small town ennui, and the odd sorts of relationships between siblings who have a decently significant age gap. 
And the trend of humans being awful continues with yet another appearance by Verona's dad. Him just knocking three times to summon her, and especially when he started talking about his anniversary and Verona's mom not wanting to have sex or even get a massage is so sad, but in the way that triggers your disgust reaction when you see it, which is something that happens a lot in real life but not in fiction. Misery is frequently gross and ugly, and that's not necessarily any kind of failing of the immiserated (though it is in this specific case). I feel the need to clarify bc this is tumblr which notably has excellent reading comprehension as a user base.
Very funny to see Verona ask Avery about what she wants her life to look like in twenty years. It makes me think back to Pact when Rose said "I don't think anyone is pretending Blake is long for this world" to which Blake's only objection was "I'm pretending!" Like these two stories and sets of protagonists are so different, and so are their situations. I hope the girls manage to make it out if this and live full happy lives without losing too much in the process, but my impression of the Otherverse from both Pact and Pactdice is that there's not a great chance it happens. 
Return of the queen! Alpeana is back again! Someone asked on the last post who my favorite Other in the story was and my response was tentatively Alpeana, but I can now more confidently say that her, Marcica, and Guilherme are all up there as current favorites. 
The Ruins are neat! As someone with a love of decomposers I can't help but enjoy learning they break down things like Echoes similarly to how the Abyss broke down more physical things. It does make me wonder if there was some sort of argument about Blake though. He existed as a physical person, but he was also a vestige. I feel like it would make sense for him to go to either so I'm curious how it worked out. We do see it raining in the Ruins and the part of the Abyss Blake landed in was The Drains. Those are both watery in theming, maybe the Drains is the part of the abyss closest to the Abyss. Runoff from the Drains falls down into the Ruins as rain or something like that? It would even make sense if we assume that once the Abyss was finished grinding down the person Blake that the spirit/vestige-y bits would go down the drain into the Ruins so it can be fully decomposed.
I love Lucy shooting the eye here and the detail that it would likely sting or blind one of the spying practitioner's eyes. It's a very cool moment and oddly enough, almost the exact same thing happens in a surprisingly excellent middle grade book called The Candy Shop Wars, which is about a group of kids recruited by an elderly candy making witch who's super shady to be her minions. I wonder if Wildbow read it and this is a reference, or just a fun little coincidence.
Collette is probably going to be hurting for a while. This eye stealing Other seems pretty nasty, and I imagine that eyes and more broadly Sight is pretty important for an augur. That's of course assuming Guilherme doesn't do something worse which is a possibility. I'd much rather have to deal with even a bounced back eye monster than a Faerie. 
Cherry is kind of cute. I'd say she needs more confidence but encouraging a goblin to be confident seems liable to end poorly for all involved..
Munch's honesty about targeting bad people not actually making goblins "good" is refreshing in its honesty. I love the faerie in this and Miss is great but it always feels like they're the ones pulling the strings. Also, the goblin queen he mentions here is the same one from Maggie's interlude right? Like it's the  blood and darkness one for sure.
These goblins having to adhere to pg 13 language is incredible and I love it.
So the Carmine Beast was there when John killed Yalda, which I don't think we knew, and it actually helped pick its own potential successor which is interesting. Did the Carmine Beast know all the way back then that it would be dying soon? ("Soon" relative to the timescale Others work on at least). Does Yalda's death indirectly lead to the Carmine Beast being gone? Like my understanding is that Black Dogs like her cause lots of sickness and curses to the people who are responsible for hurting them. If John killed Yalda on the orders of the Carmine and other judges would part of the curse transfer to them? I don't think she would be strong enough for her curse to actually like kill the Carmine Beast, but it could have weakened them and made it easier for someone else to do it. 
It seems like somehow Edith knew that the Carmine was gone before Munch came to tell her. How? We haven't seen a lot of her and Matthew since the beginning of arc 1, which makes me suspicious that Wildbow might be keeping them in the background for now only to reveal that they played some big role in the death of the Carmine Beast later on. Those two (especially Matthew) do seem to be the ones with the most knowledge of the Practice… (Other than maybe Miss who I don't believe was knowingly involved)
Verona laughing and giving the goblins the finger after they tell her she needs to be rude when saying goodbye to them is just such a fun moment. Seeing characters interact almost casually with Others is strangely heartwarming. (Even if that interaction is flipping off goblins)
I feel like I get Verona a lot more now. Hearing her talk about the existential dread of going to highschool and college just so you can get a job you hate and take on massive debt, and (if you get lucky) stumble into a strained relationship that's likely to end in disaster. 
Lucy has an affinity for slasher movies! She also has rules about them being fair. At first I thought "oh if she likes these kinds of movies maybe she'll try working with bogeymen", which would fit with her being the one who likes curses and more violent magic. As she kept watching though we got our explanation of her very Hammurabi-adjacent system of fairness. When I think back, yeah she's interested in curses and such,but generally it's been to punish them for something specific. Maybe she and Paige should hang out and Lucy could become a law mage meting out punishment to those who transgress. 
I'm really invested in Lucy's family dynamic at this point. I want it to all work out for them. Everyone involved is trying their best to keep it together and take care of each other, but it's hard! It shouldn't have to be hard, but it is, and for reasons mostly out of this family's direct control.
We're discussing familiars again. This time in the context of Avery bringing one to the trails with her. She brings up my bestie Alpeana, but I don't think she'll actually pick the mare to be her familiar. I do kind of hope one of the other girls does though. No matter what, I think we're getting close to the first Essentials ritual and it's going to be one of the girls (probably Avery) taking a familiar.
Miss is Lost. Neat. I don't feel like I know enough about that to say anything insightful yet, but I'm interested in hearing more about her time wandering the Paths. She made it through the Forest Ribbon Trail by instinct alone which is incredible, and she's constantly avoiding being slotted into a ritual or something by the universe. We already knew Miss was knowledgeable and I assumed she had a decent amount of skill using whatever abilities she has, but this makes her seem like she's on a whole other level compared to most Others we've seen in Kennet and Jacob's Bell. 
Snowdrop is a delight. I love this angry possum. She hates Avery so much and it's a lot of fun. She's also giving lots of seemingly bad advice. Is the trail different than usual somehow? Like can the Belanger's mess up the ritual somehow? Or did the girls just screw up?
The basket being hidden like that is a real dick move by the trail. Also, I don't know what's going on here! The giant babydoll head or whatever is freaky, and it doesn't seem to be talking. I'm not sure  if that's a blessing or curse in this situation. Tattoo guy and the lady holding the opossum are both kind of weird too, then there's just a guy. Tbf though him just being some guy probably makes him the weirdest one in this context. 
Changed my mind, the opossum lady is the creepiest Lost here right now. She asked "don't you want a boon companion who can't lie?" So that's seemingly confirmation that Snowdrop can lie, which we could kind of assume already but still. 
Holy shit the cat skull was even meaner than the basket. This trail fucking hates her. Doing the opposite of what Snowdrop says seems to be working though. Is that the possum trick? Not just being able to lie, but always giving the worst advice possible?
The doll head is Nicolette! All of a sudden everything has gone wrong. Snowdrop has been snatched by the Belangers, and Avery somehow messed up negotiations. I'm beginning to think picking an old wolf was a mistake. A younger one might have been faster, but it being less cunning seems more important.
The comic is ominous, but I'm not totally sure what's going on in it. The branch with no ribbon is gone. Is the wolf trying to keep Avery from finding the detour?
Nicolette interlude! It seems obvious in retrospect but I didn't see it coming.
The Belanger Circle seems like a real boys' club, which I think was a smart decision on Wildbow's part. It instantly makes me a lot more sympathetic towards Nicolette. Like I'm now completely on her side when a paragraph ago she was the trio's first real enemy.
Is the whole church Alexander's demesne? That's impressive if so. Even a large room invites quite a few challenges based on everything we saw in Pact. It doesn't quite fit with the vibe I'm getting though. So far Alexander reminds me more of Duncan Behaim. That's to say he doesn't seem like a particularly good practitioner, more like the kind of person who's powerful chiefly because of the clout the Belanger name gives him, or the amount of people he has dirt on. He feels like every rich failson I've ever seen.
Chase comes from a practitioner family other than the Belanger Circle which is interesting. Fits with my idea that Alexander relies on relationships with other practitioners for influence. Chase's motive for picking Nicolette is really gross, but also Wildbow be normal about fat people challenge. 
So the eye thief Other was a collector. Interesting. It didn't seem to have anything other than the necklace on it so I wouldn't have guessed that was the case. It certainly did a number on Nicolette even without items. 
Nicolette's parents are officially joining the ranks of Verona's father, Carol Dallon, Heartbreaker, and most of the Thorburn line as "just the worst parents a kid could ask for".
The Hallow in her head is scary! It could cause a lot of problems down the road if she ever slips up even a little.
Fuck this Belanger Circle nonsense. I think Nicolette should be allowed to beat them all up. The way they talk to her is so skeevy it just makes my skin crawl. Alexander is the worst one though. He's doing the thing where he acts nice and protective but we also know that he wants the exact same thing Seth, Tanner, and Chase do. Maybe even worse depending on who he'd marry her off to if not himself. This makes the Duchamp Coven feel feminist. 
I need Seth to get his shit wrecked. I need all of the Belanger Circle to get broken and brought low. Someone get Pauz in here. I know that would be giving demon's ground but I think it would be satisfying enough that it's worth it. In the meantime though at least the Omens she set on him will cause some problems.
No wonder Nicolette seems so well disciplined for a relatively new Practitioner. She had to strictly set rituals for herself to claw back sanity from the spirits in her Hallow before she even knew things like that actually existed. She's had to struggle for every scrap of power she has and it shows.
Miss is managing to stay out of sight of the augurs which is a big relief. Also very funny that the animal masks are throwing the Belanger's off like this. I wonder if that was why the Kennet Others had them do their awakening ritual like that in the first place. 
Alexander was the one who got Charles forsworn apparently, which also means Alexander supports the private prison industry. Yet another reason this guy is cringe.
I know I've been taking Nicolette's side a lot in this interlude but like come on. They warned you to back off! You tried to mess with them and now you've been seriously messed up by the nettlewisp. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. I only wish this didn't give Alexander more points on her.
Even though Alexander was friends with Charles he doesn't seem to know much about Kennet and the truth of its "patron".
Now the Belangers have Snowdrop and are trying to interrogate her, but they don't understand her gimmick. I think I know how this is going to turn out and I'm very eager to see it, especially now that Alexander has left. 
"You'll stay put and won't touch anything and be good?" "Yes. Absolutely." I love this God damn possum. She's skyrocketed past Alpeana, Marcica, and Guilherme to become my favorite Other in the story so far. 
Holy shit. Snowdrop just destroyed Nicolette's whole life if she can't catch her and fix the destruction. On the one hand go Snowdrop, but on the other I'm absolutely terrified of what this could mean for Nicolette.
Looking at the comments apparently a lot of people hated Nicolette? This is weird to me, but I'm also a big fan of Rose in Pact so I shouldn't be too surprised to find out my thoughts on a character like this are more positive than a lot of readers'. 
I loved this arc. So much happened in it, (especially towards the end) that I almost forgot some of the earlier chapters were part of the same arc, but that’s not a bad thing. It only makes it hard for me to summarize my thoughts here at the end. Lots of cool character building going on here as always. Avery, Lucy, and Verona are all great, and it’ll be interesting to see how they rank compared to Blake and Taylor by the end of this. Uhh, it was nice to meet more of the Others around town since we hadn’t got to see much of them, and I’m curious to see how the girls react to now having to deal with the Hungry Choir and the Belangers at the same time. That’s about it for my thoughts, but I do notice these seem to be getting longer so I may switch to doing one of these for each half of an arc. Let me know what you think of that though.
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cat0901h3 · 5 hours ago
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Goosebumps Books 1-10
Can't believe that it took me nearly two years to just do 10 covers for the books. Will be posting more Goosebumps in the future, along with other stuff.
Read more to know my personal opinions and critiques on my fanart for each book:
Welcome to Dead House: I wanted to make look alive like Monster House, so I gave it more human characteristics (ie: the people in the windows to form eyes, or the finger-like branches.) Also paid homage to a horror film by styling it after The Amityville Horror house.
The Benson children themselves look a bit depressed, that's because the first book is actually more scarier than the rest of the series, so they're a bit angsty.
Stay Out of the Basement: This one killed a lot of my green markers lol. I tried to make Dr. Brewer as menacing as possible while still showing that he is a father with the photos, There was going to be more plants reaching out, but I decided that the leaves hidden on him would be enough.
Though I have to admit my disappointment with the lighting. It still looks a bit too bright, and not dark enough. That's just my own critique.
Monster Blood: Honestly, pretty mixed about this one. While I'm proud of the bubbling ooze that looks like a skull, which is outlined by one of my colored pens. I'm not proud that everything else is so muted with brown. Almost all of Jacobus' works are vibrant and saturated, so it being dull in colors feels like a disservice to him.
Also, Andy's last name was made up by me, she apparently just doesn't have one. It's inspired by Stephen King. Btw, hope you love banana and strawberry dyed hair, you'll see more of it soon in future batches.
Say Cheese and Die!: One of my favorite books, and of course it gets the best fanart imo. The screaming skeleton form of skeleton of Greg Banks with red bg in the polaroid, contrasting with the dark background is just super cool, coolest shit I've ever done. Though I might be biased, I really like skeletons. Like Curly.
I actually made concept art for a Say Cheese and Die! graphic novel, which includes drawings of the photos and Spidey! Let me know if you're curious.
The Curse of The Mummy's Tomb: Not much to this one honestly. Just a mummy casually busting down a wall filled with hieroglyphics. Though I will say, I was experimenting with shading with purple and blues like Jacobus. As you can see, didn't stick for long.
This is also the book that I discovered that if the protag doesn't have a last name, then there is an official one either in the Presents novels, the mobile app, comics or other.
Let's Get Invisible!: This was pretty tricky to draw. Drawing someone turning invisible maybe easy in Photoshop or Procreate, but this was traditional art. Sure Jacobus did it with airbrushes, but I all had were pens and markers. But I somehow managed to pull it off, which is insane that I even managed that in the first place.
Night of the Living Dummy: Ah, the infamous Pamela Vorhees book, where the main antagonist isn't the mascot, but instead some other puppet lol. I've seen a lot of fanart of Slappy, but never of Mr. Wood. So I wanted to do justice for Wood while still showcasing Slappy. While I am proud for how it mostly turned out, there are two things that bother me. 1. This is the night sky that is black, the rest are either blue or purple. 2. I forgot to add the lines that make the jaw on Mr. Wood, whoops.
Aside from that, I hope guys like that Misfits poster in the background and Kris's cool hair cut. The green was inspired by the comic adaption not 2015 Jacksepticeye.
The Girl Who Cried Monster: Please forgive me for the small thumbnail, I wasn't using a ruler at the time. The design for Mr. Mortman wasn't much of a challenge. I loosely based it off of the French rendition of the cover and gave him a large leech-like mouth.
In my headcannon, the teeth spin like a garbage disposal, making easy work of the turtles.
Welcome to Camp Nightmare: Another one of my favorites, and I think I did a decent enough job, too. The lighting is perfect, the clouds look alien enough, and you can just barely see the screaming campers inside the tent. I do have one issue though, and that is the size of the monster, Sabre. In the original sketch I did, he was supposed to blend in like a bush, but instead he looks like Sasquatch Sr. Oh well.
While they did give Billy a last name in the Presents books, I had to make up one for Dawn. Just based it off Gwen Stacy lol. Also, hope you enjoy the little bonus pictures down below.
The Ghost Next Door: The original Jacobus art was perfectly vague enough to keep the twist there but not spoil anything. Of course to do the same thing, but with a twist of my own. The "ghost" shadow that you see in the street is the Dark Figure that follows Hannah around or when Danny is near. I wanted it to look like it was constantly on fire, since SPOILERS: someone in the book does die in a fire.
Another headcannon is that the Dark Figure isn't actually a ghost or whatever, but instead the embodiment of Misery.
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suspendingtime · 1 year ago
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🤔 Question: What are your headcanons for Kate’s first year as a Viscountess?
Hmmm, I feel like I've had others in the past so I'm probably forgetting some very obvious ones. But... becoming besties with Ben and winding Anthony up, using the governess skills to get Greg up to speed on his Latin. Lol idky but I have thought about it, cause he was all sad about his tutor, who was only hard on him (because of a certain brother 👀), but I feel like she'd be much more patient.
Speaking of the those governess/debutant creating skills; maybe someone should teach El how to dance without making it look so painful haha? And maybe have some more honest heart to hearts with her re spinster-ship etc, like that lil balcony moment in 2x03.
I'm not so eager for her to get pregnant in the first year, cause I feel like she should get time to just *be*. Just something that has been speculated about since the end of s2, but we shall see!
Apart from the above specifically, just continuing to be a menace to Anthony in the most loving way. Taking part in all the things she loves, lots of horse riding. I know they adopted Nectar the horse. Maybe she finally shows Anthony how to shoot a gun?
And as always she's drinking a lot of chai tea; cause boo to that English tea, right? [typed while enjoying a cup of English tea 😌]
👸🏾 Simone Appreciation: Favourite Simone Vogue moment
There's so many!! I'm going to chose the 24 Hours With Simon Ashley
youtube
She's always so calm and relaxing to watch in interviews, and this is a fave from Vogue. At the end she's in the Darjeeling Express with a friend, so it doubles as a little mukbang. I enjoyed it so much that I immediately giffed the part when she accidentally gives herself a milk moustache, during the sign off. 🥰
Wait, what about the Prompt? I chose Kismet 🤗 (yes it's me so I'm already behind on delivering for the first day). But fyi, it's not fiction cause I've broken my writing muscle (🧠 help). So, this time it'll be a visual something. Is that... can I... what are the rules here?
⛈ #KateWeek, Monday 12th:
🤔 Question: What are your headcanons for Kate’s first year as a Viscountess?
👸🏾 Simone Appreciation: Favourite Simone Vogue moment
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butterflybuckethat · 3 years ago
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Wildflower
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Notes: Gregory Bridgerton x Reader - I made a 🌾moodboard🌾 lol
Request: gregory pls
🦋 Masterlist 🦋
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You pulled open the mahogany double doors of Gregory Bridgerton’s wardrobe as he argued with his mother downstairs. Violet chastised him for overworking her maids with all the tears and stains he returned home with in his white chemises. She wanted him to look presentable this evening for dinner, we were having guests apparently. It was a simple enough request but Greg always found the need to argue back. You were typically amused by these interactions but, when it came to Violet, you preferred he just do what she asked so you took the initiative upon yourself. You paid careful attention to the hems as that was where they were most often torn. You could still hear them exchanging words when you found the right one and were going to rush it down to them when a number of letters, with your name on them, scattered onto the floor.  
“Gregory,” you spat, desperately holding back tears you would only allow to spill once you were alone, clutching the crumpled stack of letters “how could you?” You and Gregory had always been close, him being the Bridgerton closest to your age. Your families frequently summered together. You both resided in England, of course, but you mother felt as thought you could benefit from the camaraderie siblings afford, even for just the summer, as you were an only child. 
You fit in well, slotting right in as Gregory’s twin menace. You ran amuck, the two of you, arm in arm-picking on the Bridgerton siblings and, if they weren’t available, your parents. Though this was the perfect dynamic for you both, it didn’t always mesh with the larger English society. You were always a little too loud, a little too sun-kissed, with muddy hems and bare feet. Gregory was your best friend, your other half, and you could forgive him anything, except this. This was unforgivable. 
A few months ago, you and Francesca had join a little salon of sorts. The women who comprised it were mostly older, treating the gathering as an escape from their familial responsibilities, and politics were seldom spoken about but it was, nonetheless, incredible. They would exchange baubles and gossip as if it were air, playing cards and complaining about their husbands. Sometimes they would give you and Francesca instruction on how to attract a husband, teaching you how to handle a fan, drop your handkerchief, and take a turn about the room. You took to the advice slower than Francesca. A wicked streak ran deep in you both but she was something you definitely weren’t: malleable. She took to instruction like a fish to water, all while maintaining her wit and precocious air, and you were stuck in the mud. 
Your carriage was late one evening. Francesca had offered to drop you off but you were certain it was just around the corner. The salon was in relatively low attendance so the two of you spent the majority of the evening speaking with that nights host, Lady Francis Eve. She was a rather eccentric woman, well adorned and always the first to know all the secrets of the ton. Lady Francis was widowed early in her life and produced no offspring, though she did have a truly incredible number of nephews. You were standing in her foyer, apologizing every so often for the tardiness of you ride, when she tapped her chin and said, “my nephew Peter would simply adore you.”
Three weeks later you received a letter addressed from Viscount Peter Bough containing only two lines: I sincerely hope you are the Lady Y/FN Y/LN my beloved aunt speaks so fondly of. If not, please disregard. You indulged of course, scribbling a little something in return, and so began a months long correspondence. 
“Gregory,” you said again, weaker this time. It had been over a fortnight since you had last received a letter but you did send three. Your were left in something of a lurch. You had yet to meet Lord Bough in person, and he had hinted at perhaps coming to London, “with a ring” Eloise had joked. You thought that perhaps he had fallen ill, or his home had caught fire, or was killed in the ricochet of a duel. 
“Please,” Gregory whispered, his large eyes wet. You felt a pang in your chest but steeled yourself, snatching the letters out of his hands and storming off into the gardens. 
Though the Bridgertons keep their lawns and gardens well-manicured, but you preferred the tall grasses by the creek. That sliver sat between the Bridgerton property and the next, left completely untouched. You lied down, uncharacteristically uncaring of the wildflowers you crushed beneath you, and hid from the world. You couldn’t open the letters, not yet. You had always shared everything with Gregory and he must have hidden the letters for a reason. You stared at the sun until your eyes hurt and all you could see was purple. 
“Y/N,” Gregory cast a shadow across your face, barefoot and collar untucked. He sat next to you, twiddling blades of grass between his long fingers. “My mother wanted me to tell you to get out of the sun.” You looked up at him, deadpan. “She didn’t, actually,” he coughed. 
“You must be kidding.” 
“You haven’t opened them,” he pointed at the stack of white envelopes scattered beside you. 
“I don’t yet know why you hid them.” You still trusted him. How could you not? He was the one who snuck you sweets from the kitchen when you were kids, stood in front of you when the governess would chastise your muddy smock, kept you from feeling completely alone when you were ignored at luncheons and balls. 
“Do you detest me?”
“I haven’t decided yet.”  You knew why you were upset. It wasn’t so much the violation of your property and privacy, but because you felt as if this were your shot. Never had any man in the ton shown you any genuine affection or interest, at least not one you would ever consider marrying, and you did want to marry. Lord Peter Bough was interested. This was the first time you had hope that you weren’t going to die an old maid. Only Greg knew of your guilty pleasure of trading the most ridiculous novels with the maids. 
You sat in silence as the sun set, letters burning between you both. But you could feel him sticking little purple flowers in your hair, across the crown of your head and tucked into the loosened tresses from that morning. “You should read them,” Gregory said. 
“Why?” you turned to face him, “what do they say?”
“I never read them.” 
“Then why did you take them?” 
“It’s been a month,” he shrugged. You waited for him to continue, building the silence until it forced him to speak, “Eloise...” he cleared his throat, “she made that comment,” he did it again, “about the ring.” 
“Greg-”
“I haven’t seen you-”
“You have.” 
“Not really, not like before.” He stuck his hands in his pockets, “you’re in your room, writing.”
“That’s how Eloise-”
“Found a husband!” he finished for you. You were going to say ‘spent her summers.’ Your cheeks burned red. What you were too embarrassed to admit, even to Gregory, was that you were hoping that you would. Eloise was also wild and outspoken but she, unlike you, had the cushion of good breeding. Not that you weren’t well bred, but not in any way that was comparable to the Bridgerton name. 
“I am a woman, Greg. It is my prerogative to be married.” This might be the closest you would ever get to admitting your desire. It was embarrassing, craving romance to such a degree. 
“Not you.” Your eyes burned and watered as you stood, so quickly you were likely to fall back down again. Gregory grabbed your wrist before you could run off, “wait.” You yanked your arm but he held tight. “I didn’t mean-”
“How-” you choked. It was as if a dam had broken, all the whispers and disapproving glances from the mamas, scoffs from your peers, disappointed looks from your own mother, just confirmed by the one person you trusted most. “How-” you sobbed. He moved to wrap his arms around you but you pushed him back, hard enough that he stumbled. “Why would you say that to me?” All that fear and pain was replaced by rage. Why not you? What made you less worthy of love than anyone else?
“That’s not-”
“I am deserving of love, Gregory.” You dug your finger into his chest, “is that so hard to believe? That a man would be interested in me? I am funny and kind and well-read...for the most part.” You lost steam pretty quickly. It was always like that, large bursts of emotion that fell just as quickly as they came. Gregory’s face broke, as if he were seeing you for the first time in years. He stepped toward you, snaking his arm around your waist and his hand on you cheek. 
“You are deserving of more love than any one man can offer.” He pulled you close enough that you could feel the warmth of his skin seep into yours. “Certainly more than little Petey Bough can offer.” 
It was dark and you could barely see one another but you knew what he looked like. The only lights were the distant one of the house and the yellow and green flickers of the fireflies that surrounded you. Your hear beat so loud you could hear it in your ears as you tentatively placed your hands on his chest. You could feel it steadily rise and fall. 
“There is not a moment I do not think of you,” Gregory pushed a loose strand of your hair behind your ear. “I took the letters-” he took a breath. “I took the letters because if Peter had any sense in the world he would ask you to marry him the moment her stepped foot in London,” he paused again, “and I don’t think I would be able to stomach it.”
You wanted to kiss him. You wanted to kiss him more than you wanted anything in your entire life. But he was all you had and you weren’t sure if you were ready to let go of life as it was. 
“Greg?” Violet shouted from the house. You could make a life with Greg, you knew that, if that’s what he wanted. And you did want love, so so badly, but part of you was terrified, wondering if a future as an unwed maid would really be so bad. 
“Master Gregory,” the deep voice of Smathers the butler startled you both. 
“Smathers!” Gregory had jumped nearly two feet into the air, “make some noise next time, I beg of you.”
“My apologies, sir. Dinner is awaiting your presence.” You walked ahead, not waiting for the two men to catch up.
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laf-outloud · 2 years ago
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I love how Tom has this air of menace. But Greg is an absolute sweetheart. That is some impressive acting.
I know, right? I'm supposed to be suspicious of Tom but every time I see bts footage of Greg, I just want to excuse anything bad Tom's ever done because surely such a nice guy can't play such a creepy character. LOL!
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peacockwinchester · 3 years ago
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Gregory, being a menace:
Michael, chasing him around: Wait up, Evan!
Greg, confused: I'm Gregory?
Misha, grimacing, bc he knows who Evan was:
Sebastian, frantically rescheduling his dad's therapy appointments:
Mike: Gregory... Sorry... Dunno what that was lol
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istherewifiinhell · 9 months ago
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im being an asshole here and these are gonna be shittly annonated more than described... for the sake of my fucking health lol. (mental and RSI lol) pls go look at my wifi reads mirage tag for better and more worth while comics blogging (lot of those are labours of love u know)
okay now to commence with the comic that hurt my brain. lets see. 5 issues? oh and only one i even kinda liked. uh oh
lemme do my due first.
ST vs TF No. 1: written john barber, mike johnson, art philip murphy
colours priscilla tramontano letters christa miesner edits chase marotz and david mariotte pub greg goldstien
No. 2: colours by leonardo ito and josh burcham No. 3: art by jack lawrence. colours by burcham No. 4&5: art by murphy
(its a name and shame as much as its giving credit >_>)
what i want from my tf st crossover comic:
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like. 1. mccoy aphorism (also... may i?) 2. brilliant. perfect. spock saying illogical and optimus prime in the same sentence. no notes.
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. 1. mccoy called her MAAM. ghbfdjhg. see. im saying. if u gonna do a sexist thing. at least put an old southern man it using his manners <3 only time i really enjoyed a woman being on screen im afraid. 2. they turned the enterprise into a big robot. yaaaaay.
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kirk says. prime directive. oppie says. PRIME's directive. hearty chucky. great.
a note here u can see that this is a g1 and tas crossover. i have no familarity with tas actually (is that shocking i wonder. 70s cartoons i know less of, in fact) so like idk maybe theres some stuff i dont like cause its actually a reference or smth. lol. THE INCLUSION OF. tf stuff thats clearly not aligned with actual g1 cartoon visually or thematically tho.... i have my doubts. sucks </3
(see that those first four were by lawarence, which i like. and the next two by murphy, which i dont tho those arent particularly bad showings)
the things i did not really want but knew i was gonna get anyway 'dammit im a doctor not an x' 'more than meets the eye' <- TOO MANY TIMES. talk about blowing ur load. and not even in a fun way.
but there were things ill always like too see. like speaking of blowing ur load.
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.1. megop menacing each other. gayass. 2. megs unloading a fusion blast into prime. rearrange his GUTS!!!!
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.1. megs looming and threatening. oppie on the ground. you wanted to do WHAT on cybertron? 2. they are grappling each other. hehe hold hands.
and screamer:
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megs riding inside screamers cockpit in gun mode. hey thats two the phallic things for the price of one.
yes girl go do ur crazy shit i know how it goes lol.
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screamer is refering to the klingons in both cases. 2. hey like. why u phrase it like that (microagression)(gay as hell)
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.1. lawrence screamer. my tiny wife (so small. drawn so good. i cant explain it) 2. lawrence megs. hes handsome :) (whats with the moment of victory line tho)
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MOM! you never take MY side. thats a lot of judgement for not having a face soundwave
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screamer menacing the klingons. hes crushed many high councils and fuck the government.
WAIT. BASED STARSCREAM. SAY THAT SHIT. also thats just a classic g1 screamer face ill give u that murphy. thats him throwing megs out the air lock type shit.
now why exactly this comic thought i would care more about like. tos klingons (sure one of the enemy factions but not particularly. like... ICONIC?) than the decepticons. like.... idk obviously the decepticons cant win but why can the klingons get a win over them u know? like idk... tos klingons are whatever. g1 cons. thats. those are my guys?????
but hey at least they put megatron in bondage
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like. oh for me? thigh restrains.... why u shouldnt have..... i am barking at this image even if i think his arms are wrong? cant quite place it. cursed my dick etc.
OKAY. now heres some concern points. women.
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woman decepticon (who looks weird btw) grabbing kirk and shes 'not his type'. BAD.
and yes instead of the fair superior make some of the seekers girls method. THATS AIRARCNID for some fucking reason. and she still has that stupid fucking steath helicopter alt instead of. oh idk ANYTHING that would look normal next to g1 vehicles. even windblade looks better in alt mode. where the FUCK IS SKYWARP (girl version <3)
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screamer calling her airachnid (also this comp reference straight from the g1 s1 intro)
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utube screenshot. same pose, different character positions
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TC, screamer and soundwave posing up. the the lady con crammed behind them. me when i definitely remembered to block the woman into my pencils (this is the artist i like. CHRIST) (also cause im definitely working from a thumbnailed layout and not just comping in all these crisp jpegs like... however)<- more the other guy
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sulu 'flying' wind blade. she tells him to back off. the amount of things i dont like about this image...... do i even need to say em? WHO LET IT HAPPENED
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acree grabs ravage. (kitty) to protect mech version of mress (cat alien). why the fuck does robot mress look cooler than arcee thats sad (though that arm...... )
also now that i think about... i dont think i ever saw arcees alt... this is g1... she literally has one whats ur fucking problem. comic from 2018. shes had one since 1986. no one is asking u to prove the transformation scheme WORKS.
THE JAZZ ISSUE.
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group posing of autobots. acree looks bad next to earth alt mode bots as always. wind blade looks bad just ingeneral as always. ratchet and bees faces look.... not great. jazz looks fine but hes yelling about not wanting to see humans.
so like..... theres this thing...... ive seen this guys comics wiki page and theirs a lot of jokes about him shooting humans. why does jazz hate humans? (like. i know. at least one comic i guess? multiple? unsure. went has far as. HE HAD TO SHOOT A COP. to save someones life. which. which. sure. thats. a commentary. probably. what is GOING ON in there) anway. i think including whatever stupid fucking baggage u gave him into. THE SILLY HAHA 70s and 80s CARTOON CROSSOVER. IS DUMB. hey jazz is really agressive and hates humans now. NO ONE SEES THE PROBLEM THERE? IS I THIS THING ON?
and then they still had him do some nominally g1 jazz like dialogue (i cannot speak to the authenticity of his use of jive slang uh... ever? but at least in the cartoon it was being said by scatman crothers?) anyway. really weird. bad tonally. jazz is my fucking friend he LIKES humans. thats the whole fucking.... THING. what the hell.
also combining it with even having to just. SEE windblade. eh yeah well. you know.
FINALLY. the art. i actually dont want to spend too long just specifically belabouring the bad art. i mean 1. cause i dont want to screenshot a bunch of bad art. two cause yeah its kinda mean. 3. im not actually sure i can explain it in a way that wont make me sound crazy. i hate when i start getting the really niche tf opinions like this.
but like. yeah the comp isnt very good. like artistically and also literally whatever way they were getting all the characters into the same scenes. not great like. perspective or sense of place which.... kinda need that one. in this specific case.... weird errors that stood out too. some awkward paneling too....
but mainly yeah i found the way murphy drew the g1s like... really off putting. as soon as i got to no. 3 i was literally just so relieved i scrolled the whole thing without reading it first just to. look. and then that was the only one </3
just something like no no this way of drawing the blocks ISNT GOOD. kibble looks wrong. etc. and then also. g1 characters just. dont move in certain ways okay. in the arms and stuff... i know it when i see it. (smh at myself) whatever.
in essence and most important i guess. it didnt often charm me. for shame.
but may i present
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optical illusion acid storm. damn i guess they really must be a non binary icon cause i cant fucking figure out what angle thats supposes to be. (<- unclear what i mean by that)(actually i think this is nifty more that bad like. it genuinely is tricking my eyes)
worst fucking splash page ive seen in my life
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the decepticons coming in to kick starscreams ass. all just kinda pasted together without much scale, composition, values. etc. note rumbles (purple guy, bottom right) missing head (like yeah hes mid transform but.... it looks dumb. what was gained drawing him this way) and trypticon (that big robot dinosaur you may notice just kinda. in the background layer) lines being way larger. as if it was just. select transformed to be big enough for this. it actually haunted me cause it looked so much like default art or smth. not that i could find tho. BUT HEY! skywarp. (top left corner)
like idk boss it looks like ass. if i saw this printed out and slid into some kids binder id be like. oh wow bud thats awesome! you like the decepticons? me too! did you edit this other your self? thats cool!!!
in conclusion
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girl boss cover (screen cuts to black but u can hear me muffled but loud and agonized "nurse chaple wasnt even IN-)
okay im gonna need to be a hater in peace here
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folklauerate · 3 years ago
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So i started reading Miles to Go because i’m a huge Grucy fan and i saw Lucy in the tags, is she gonna appear?
Btw I loved it, i’m really curious to see how Miles and Arshi scheme will develop and how everyone in the families will take it
Hello anon! First of all, thanks for reading that fic. It's wormed it's way into my heart quite firmly; I love my lil menaces Miles and Arshi.
My plan is to have cameos from all the first gen Bridgerton siblings and their families! Greg and Lucy will def be making a couple of appearances in the fic, do not worry :) they've got plenty of kids and Miles looooves to spoil his nieces and nephews with attention!
As for their scheme-it'll develop about as well as you would expect lol. They're both idiots. They're both kinda down bad right from the get go. It's going to go terribly.
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aconitewolfsbane · 5 years ago
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Steven Universe Future Reactions - Bluebird
- “I’m an actor.” Yes. Yes you are. - Kinda TP’d... lol - That’s the spirit. - DundunDUH! - Eww... - Amethyst, you jerk. - The bathroom is apparently the designated room for awkward conversations. I’m... not sure how that came about. - Hey, Greg! - Such a menace. She must be stopped. - Pearl is so done with his BS right now. - Classic prank! - New painting! Steven and his REAL mums. Nice! - Why would she need to stretch? Gem bodies aren’t real, so they don’t even have muscles. So they can’t pull one. So... WHY?! - Poor Amethyst. - That’s not a good scream... - They thought they were being so subtle... - Oof, poor Greg. Dangling only by his hair like that... That’s gotta hurt. - Also, what’s with the Greg hate this season?! He’s a good bloke, leave Greg along, Rebecca! - WHOA! - Steven’s so strong, he can cradle his own father like a child. - *crawls to his discarded hair* “Oh, my baby...” LMTO! - They’re not even listening... - Called him. - Ooh, nice blade. I want Pearl to fight her. Ooh! Or Connie! Connie would wreck the bitch. - ALEXANDRITE! - That was quick. Bluebird got curb-stomped in like, two seconds flat. - They are so done. - Bubble the bitch. - Burial at sea for his hair. That is such a Greg thing to do. - Also, that probably gonna wash up somewhere and start a murder investigation or something...
TL;DR: Never invite anybody who might have a problem with you to your house, you fucking dumbass; When your child tells you that someone is trying to kill him, maybe you should believe him? Especially when he has a history of people trying to kill him...; Pranks are an excellent way to wear down you enemies. Bonus points if they are as bizarre as possible; After a haircut, give it a Viking funeral. You don’t have to, but it’s cooler.
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bostonpoetryslam · 6 years ago
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On Plenty of Fish, a 62-year old man in Istanbul asks for your hand in marriage. I could be happy, you think. I could be happy. On OKCupid, Zach messages you asking for pictures of your feet. Close-ups, he writes. None of that from-across-the-room bullshit. You swipe left on Greg. He’s wearing hats in all his pictures; you assume he’s balding and insecure. A few days later, Greg shows up again. You swipe left. Soon after, he shows up yet again, and, again, you swipe left. The fourth time, you notice as his face begins to change in the pictures,      becomes distorted, his smile twists into a menacing grimace. Greg will not be ignored. Adam is covered in tattoos, did a five-year stint in prison for manslaughter,      texts you every night at 11:01PM saying: send me a pic lol. You’re in love with him.
Bertha Isabel Crombet, “Dating App Gothic,” published in NDR
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drawbauchery · 8 years ago
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I meant to funny, but then I serious-ed. Anyways, here’s a sequel that nobody asked for.
You are concerned.
Well, no, that’s not quite right. You are Peridot. But you’re feeling concerned.
It began a while back. You had been going through the barn looking for something new to make meepmorp. It was then that you found the radio.
It never seemed like much. After finding a place to plug it in, you had even had fun listening to the music that spilled out of it. Your barn mate, a Lapis Lazuli, had even listened to the music with you. After hearing some songs enough, you both would sing along with the radio.
Then you found that station.
What you didn’t know before is that Lapis Lazulis have a certain harmonic resonance. When a certain type of music plays, a Lapis Lazuli has a reaction that appears to affect her consciousness and, to a lesser extent, her physical projection.
That is literally the only reason you can think of for why she acts the way she does.
It seemed harmless at first. Sure, you were shocked that she would steal the radio at first, but she seemed to be over it after that.
Then it happened again.
And again.
And again.
You tried to hide the music machine, but she found it every time. You tried burying it, but it was always dug up.
A few days ago you finally decided to cut the power cord. An extreme measure, but one that had to be done. She was addicted to the music. You thought that she would go back to her normal demeanor after a few days without music.
It seemed to work. Lapis was back to her old self again. It was finally over.
You awoke today missing your tablet.
You can’t let this go. You can’t let her destabilize herself like this. You have to put an end to this.
You grab a hammer from your collection of tools and run outside. She’ll be where she always goes, so you run to the silo. As you round it, you see exactly what you expected.
Your barn mate is off to the side, making her strange motions. Her eyes lol off to different sides of her head while her tongue pokes out between her lips. You don’t understand why she continues to do this to herself.
Off to the side is the offending machine now. Your tablet is propped up on a stump, a tinny music playing out of the back. You steadily make your way over to it.
You raise the hammer, thinking your apologies to the companionable machine, but stop when you hear a voice behind you.
“Peridot? What are you doing?”
You turn your head to look at the source of the voice. Standing there is no longer the Lapis making those weird movements, but your Lapis. Your arms crossed, eyebrow raised, head tilted, obviously confused Lapis.
You look back at your tablet. The music continues to play out of the back of it. But that’s impossible.
The entire point of a harmonic resonance means that as long as the music is playing, the effect remains. But here Lapis is, acting as if nothing is happening. It doesn’t make sense.
Unless you were wrong about the resonance the whole time.
You quickly turn your body to face your friend, hiding the hammer behind your back. You’re actually quite happy that you don’t have to destroy your tablet. It would have been a difficult loss, even if it was to save your friend.
Her brow arches higher and you remember that she asked you a question.
Okay, play it cool Peridot. You’ve conducted an interrogation before. You can work around these questions.
“Nothing. What are you doing out here?”
Brilliant. Grade A question dodging.
Her face doesn’t change, but she answers your question all the same, “I came out here to have a little fun.” She looks behind you, you assume at the tablet, and then her eyes flit back to yours. “Sorry about taking your tablet, but the cord for the radio wasn’t attached.”
Your mouth gapes open. Fun? She called looking foolish like that fun?
Granted, you’ve seen Amethyst and Steven do some odd things themselves. They were never things that she really thought to do, but the other two seemed to enjoy themselves. But that was Amethyst and Steven.
“That’s fun? How is looking foolish like that fun?”
Lapis frowns. Dang, you went off and offended her again. You’re really trying to work on that, but it just happens sometimes.
“It’s not about looking foolish.” She starts closing the space between the two of you, her height giving her a slightly menacing edge over you. She reaches out, and you flinch back a bit expecting… you’re not sure.
She’s never hit you or yelled at you. Hell, you’ve enjoyed her company ever since she moved into the barn with you. However, when you’re a small Peridot with a large imagination, a larger gem with powers like Lapis has can be quite intimidating. You wish you still had your limb enhancers.
She grasps the hand at your side with a firm, yet gentle, hold and brings it towards her. “It’s about… just not thinking and letting your body move. It’s about letting go of everything for a little while.”
You look down as you think on that. Lapis has been through a lot. Maybe just letting everything go for a while could be good for her. Maybe you were hasty in your earlier conclusions.
She breaks you out of your thoughts when she says, “Maybe you should try it.” You look back into her face to find a smirk. Her eyes are half-lidded, and you can see the glint behind them.
“Ohhhh, no.” You back away a step, holding your hand out in front of you. “You can do what you want, but I’m not getting involved in this one.”
She shrugs. “Suit yourself, then.” Her smirk doesn’t change as she turns away from you and goes back to where you first found her. You merely stand there as she relaxes and goes back into her movements.
After a minute of watching the blue gem, you pull the hammer from behind your back and look at it. You were about to break something because you had the wrong idea about it. She did look like she was enjoying her time. Maybe you owed it to her to try it out.
And so, you dropped the hammer and walked over near where she was moving around. You try to relax your body and let your mind go. After a little while, you let your body just move with the music.
And you both give it the ol’ razzle dazzle.
 Bonus: Actual Resonance
A chime sounded as you appear on top of the pad. You raise the soda cup in your hand and take a sip of what little is left in it as you step off the warp pad and into the small field leading to the barn Greg was letting the gems use. The barn that is now home to a couple of gems that you consider friends.
You are Amethyst, and you’re here to spend some quality time with some good friends.
The first place you look is the barn, but you don’t get a response when you call out. You try looking around inside, but see no trace of either of the gems. Guess you’ll have to look elsewhere.
You pop the empty soda cup into your mouth as you start for the next likely place they’ll be. While you focus on the interesting flavor, the silo starts to come into view. When you come close enough though, you think you hear something.
Some strange… music.
The closer you get, the more it seems to ring in your head. The drums and horns seem to run through your arms. You can practically feel the rhythm pounding in your gem.
You think about stopping, but at the same time you don’t want to. It’s like the music has a hold over you.
As your eyes slacken and roll around, you remember what this is. It’s been so long since this last happened that you’d forgotten all about it. You give a little smile as your tongue sticks out between your lips.
This was going to be fun.
And so, the music overwhelmed you.
And you gave it the razzle dazzle.
(pretend-im-not-there )
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