#a hill to die on

[clockwayswrites]

A Hill To Die On

This is most of Chapter 1, cutting before the smut. IT DOES GET SPICY THOUGH. 🌶️⚠️ Some of this has been posted before, but figured I'd give you all one nice big chunk of it!

Tim brush his hand idly through his damp hair as he stepped out of the shower.

It had gotten long.

He hadn’t planned to grow it out, it just sort of happened. He’d gotten it cut last summer before he started his sophomore year of college. The start of the semester had bled into midterms. Midterms had proceeded papers and projects. Projects had become final presentations and exams. Classes ended abruptly into a too short winter break of Tim visiting Cass and her team then dragging her home for Christmas. The New Year had been filled with Titans and teammates and fireworks.

He might cut it when it started getting to muggy. Spring had barely broken into the city. It was warm enough not to need heavy coat but cool enough Tim could still wear his favorite leather jacket he’d stolen from Jason. It was a good time of the year.

His hair really had gotten long.

As long as the wig Tim wore when he became Caroline. He tugged at the ends of the hair where, if he tilted his head down to look up under his lashes, the black strands brushed the top of his shoulders.

Tim hadn’t been Caroline Hill in a long time now.

Or Alvin Draper.

Or Timothy Drake— CEO to be.

He hadn’t been anyone, really. Instead he had been struggling to find out who Tim Wayne was beyond the expectations of dead parents, missions hidden behind masks, and under the weight everyone else’s needs.

He still really didn’t know.

It felt more like a game of finding out what he wasn’t than falling into what he was. Or what he liked to be.

He could be a ruthless businessman, but that was Timothy Drake, wasn’t it? That was his father’s Jack’s legacy and Janet’s cold, confident smile. He didn’t like being that.

He didn’t like being them.

He could be whatever the mission needed. He could do recon, hacking, infiltration, fighting—a replacement, like Jason said. The word didn’t have the same sting that it used to. Replacement. It was almost a word of respect now. It had taken a lot of talking (and a lot of alcohol) for Jason and Tim to get somewhere good, but they both got it now. Red Robin was whoever the team needed.

He was tired of having to fill in cracks.

He beyond tired of just existing for everyone else’s needs.

The weight of that had nearly broken him.

Had broken him.

Tim watched the black strands of hair slip over the spider web of scars on his left hand.

Bruce had assured him that there would always be a place with the Bats if Tim still wanted it. Tim didn’t know if he would. Tim refused to just fill in the space that was left open anymore. It took a lot of sessions with his Justice League approved therapist for Tim to even get to that line in the sand, but he understood how important it was now.

He had to stop being the replacement. The other Robin. The other son.

It was a problem.

Another problem was, he didn’t always think he was Tim Wayne, even with the pieces that he was slowly learning.

Tim dug around under his sink, coming up with the purple case he’d stolen from Steph to keep Caroline’s things in. The robin red lipstick was on the top. Slowly he uncapped it and smeared it almost recklessly across his lips.

Tim no longer stared back out from the mirror.

Maybe Caroline deserved a night out.

It had been a long time, after all.

-

Clothing was an issue.

Tim had grown. Not much mind, but enough that the shoulders were a little tight and bottoms a little short. Well, the bottoms weren’t a huge matter in that moment. Caroline wanted to go out to a club after all; they could work with a too short skirt. The top though… Caroline adjusted the black strap of the lacy bra. Even with the right padding in, it still didn’t look right.

She chewed on her lower lip, still messily smeared with bright red, as she held another top up against her chest. That wouldn’t do either. Caroline gave the box of old clothing a little kick. Hum. She should paint her toenails.

Focus, Caroline.

It was time to look outside of her box.

Fifteen minutes and a pair of scissors later and one of Alvin’s too large and nondescript red t-shirts had become a drop shoulder crop top. It wasn’t the most amazing fit, but as she dressed it up with the right necklace looped a few times around her throat, a splash of red and leather in the bracelets (cover the scars, they were identifying marks), she figured she could pull off the look—at least for getting sweaty in some dark club.

Ever grateful for quick drying polish, Caroline did a rush job of all her nails and waved them impatiently dry before she did her make up properly. Some contouring, false lashes, the right highlights, step by step Caroline felt herself come alive again until staring back from there mirror was no Tim or Timothy or Alvin—just her.

Just Caroline.

She let out the breath she had been holding.

-

Finding the right club took a little bit. Her old favorite had shut down, apparently. That wasn’t uncommon with the short lifespan of clubs and even less so in Gotham with the money laundering and drug rings that often went with the clubs, but it still sucked. Caroline wanted somewhere that if someone got very handsy on the dance floor there wouldn’t be issue with everything that was carefully and securely tucked away in her underwear. The person might not want all that, which was perfectly fine as long they parted ways amicably.

(And if not, well, one of her bracelets could be shockingly persuasive.)

She tucked her fake ID back away in the hidden pocket of her bra, not minding the bit of a show it gave. Tim would have to make her a new one; she didn’t needed the fake age anymore. Then, with a steadying breath, she entered the thudding music, bright lights, and throng of bodies of the club. It took a moment to adjust to it all. This wasn’t always Caroline’s favorite thing, but they needed to relax already. Any tenser and something was going to snap.

Besides, this is where the boys failed and Caroline thrived; slipping between bodies, flirting, giving enough to capture attention without actually giving anything away. Dealing with a mass of people was a complex game of chess and Caroline very much intended to be the conquering queen.

The bar was the first stop, ordering a fruity martini so that she could sip at the drink and people watch for a time. It was always good to get a feel for things before diving in. It also gave her time to get used to being her again as she fielded a few flirtatious advances which landed her another drink in turn for the first dance of the night with her. She didn’t linger long.

She wasn’t sure what she was in the mood for. Caroline flitted across the dance floor from partner to partner, just letting herself enjoy the thud of the beat and the press of bodies. She always moved on before people could get too invested (or too handsy).

Caroline was on the edge of the floor, slipping away from one dance and looking for the next when a laughing group at a close by table shoved one of their number her way. She took a tentative step back, but didn’t actually need to. The poor sacrificial lamb found his footing rather gracefully.

He ducked his head with a crooked smile that was actually somehow charming. “Sorry about them.”

“Stay on target, Danny!” someone called from the table to cheers and jeers.

Danny rolled his eyes. “Really sorry. Just, ah, I maybe have been talking about how pretty you are and how much I want to dance with you for, like, the last twenty minutes. Feel free to tell me to fuck off if this is rude, but would you like to dance?”

Caroline tilted her head and tried not to smile in too predatory a way. “You’ve been watching me?”

“It’s hard not to, with how you move.”

She laughed at that. This one was so earnest. That was odd for Gotham.

“Once dance,” Caroline said, holding out a hand. “Unless you have the moves and then maybe you’ll get more.”

Danny took the hand and brushed a kiss against it. “One dance, to start.”

-

Despite any doubts that Caroline might have had, Danny knew how to move. She’d lost count of the song they had danced to about the time that Danny’s hand had first slid up her shirt. She rolled her hips, grinding back against Danny’s tight jeans and growing arousal. Danny followed her lead beautifully.

His teeth scrapped lightly against her neck and she threw back her head for him, letting him suck a mark into her skin. She enjoyed the thought of Tim being stuck with a reminder of her night out. (Maybe it would convince him to have some fun of his own.)

Danny’s hand slid down from where it had been cupping a breast, traced over her stomach, and moved to her skirt. Caroline caught it before Danny could do more than slip a few fingertips past the band.

“Sorry,” he murmured into her ear.

“Not that,” Caroline said. She turned her head to press a kiss against the corner of Danny’s mouth, smearing robin red against his tan skin. “Just need to let you know there’s more down there than you might be expecting.”

She held her breath as tightly as she held Danny’s hand. It this went bad, she wanted to be able to act quickly.

Danny’s huff of air sounded amused.

She relaxed her grip slightly.

The hand slipped a little lower.

“To me, any combination of bits is a good combination. I’m up for all sorts of surprises,” Danny assured her. His fingers ran over just the top edge of her underwear, not really touching anything, but applying just enough pressure that she shuddered. “She’ okay to use?”

“Yes. She, her, Caroline.”

“Caroline.” Danny said her name like it was a prayer.

She guided his hand a little lower.

His touch stayed almost teasing and Caroline had to alternate between pressing forward into his hand and grinding backwards against him until Danny pulled them so close together that she could barely move. And fuck, it had been too long for any of them. She half thought that if she put in the effort, or Danny’s hand dipped any lower, that she could manage to come right there on the dance floor.

That was not how she wanted tonight to go.

She ran her hands through Danny’s hair and tilted his head where she wanted it. So that she could nip at his ear lobe. “Tell me you live close.”

“In walking distance.”

[clockwaysarts]

Spicy Tim Drake in some lingerie~

Can't let Caroline have all the fun.

[niobiumao3]

I need a complete Batch Reunion yes with Tech in S3 for these reasons:

Crosshair and Wrecker were such a PAIR. Cross being surly and Wrecker not caring/trying to cheer him up. Crosshair teasing Wrecker.

Tech driving Crosshair insane with how he point blank will not respond to being baited. Tech being like 'you are perfectly entitled to your wrong opinions' and Crosshair losing his entire mind (Cross likes to play it cool but he is actually a volcano ready to explode).

Crosshair preventing many of Tech's insane ideas by outting them to Hunter before Tech can start them.

Wrecker and Tech arguing about something pointless while Crosshair helps the argument along by playing devil's advocate to both sides.

Hunter and Echo attempting to wrangle the 3 of them.

By not seeing anything prior to Kaller we have been denied ALL of this and I DEMAND at least a few episodes.

[markwateneymemorialcrater]

Ok. I’m going to bitch about a thing I keep seeing in fantasy world building that annoys be and probably only me.

It’s when they have grand massive statues or structures that don’t feel structurally sound. This is most notable in statues of people, and they have massive cantilevered parts. Think outstretched armed or weapons. I’m going to blame this on fully CGI environments where these statues exist in a world without actual structural constraints. Though it often exists In purely 2 dimensional mediums as well.

For example of what I mean. Let’s look at two interpretations of the argonath from lord of the rings.

This is from the Peter Jackson movies I would consider this a plausible construction. There is still the outstretched hands but the flowing robes provide enough support underneath to carry the load. This is also a physical model sculpted and built and then composited into frame, which I think lends to its more “grounded” feeling. It really did have to stand on its own. Even if it was at scale and made of foam. . It still feels structurally possible.

Here is another interpretation. Before I get too far into shitting on this beautiful artwork, let me just say that this is a beautiful interpretation and in some ways more book accurate that the movie adaptation (they hold axes. Not swords) and it is at the end of the day, fantasy. It doesn’t need to follow our physics.

But my complaint is that there is no physical way you could build a stone structure with that kind of cantilevered arms. Stone is great in compression but poor in tension. An outstretched arm like that would have a lot of tension in it. Of course you could theorize that they have invented some form of tension cables. We use rebar for this. But even with such technology. It would still be an incredible challenging thing to build, let alone build to last 1000 years intact.

The statue in Numenor in Amazons Rings of Power also seems guilty of this structural implausibility. But I got to say. Otherwise Numenor looks amazing in this show. Love the Byzantine inspiration of Numenor.

[miametropolis]

9th doctor you have to stop. your doc martens too classic. your leather jacket too cunt. your buzzcut too perfect. your swag is too lesbian...9th doctor they'll kill you.

[mikurinkuwu]

butchfemme mikurin

[catmask]

being the most left leaning family member means everyone will always think that youre insane and then in two years they will believe what you were explaining to them two years ago but still think youre insane now. and you do it anywaybecause you love them

[aprillikesthings]

“Bamboo is antifungal”

Because it’s rayon

“Eucalyptus fabric is cooling!”

Yeah, because it’s rayon

“We make clothing called seacell out of seaweed!”

Yeah I looked on your website it’s made by the lyocell process, which means-

-wait for it-

It’s fucking rayon!!

Listen. There is a list of actual plant fibers that are directly made into fabric: cotton, linen, ramie, some hemp. I’m sure I’m missing a couple.

But if you’re wondering “huh how did they turn that plant material into fabric,” 99% of the time? It’s RAYON.

All rayon is made by putting plant material in chemical soup, dissolving out everything but the cellulose, and turning the cellulose into filaments/fibers.

The source of the cellulose has zero effect on the eventual fabric.

Rayon made from bamboo or eucalyptus or seaweed is not any better than rayon from any other sources.

Don’t let companies mislead you!

[jun6bugs]

i love my kind of shitty son

[neottia-orchids]

Head empty, just WD5 chilling 🥺

[clockwayswrites]

A Hill to Die On, ch4, p1

masterpost

Despite Tim making a phone number for Alvin and having permission for him to message Danny, Alvin was proving elusive. Tim wasn’t entirely sure why; he’d never really tried to interact with the other alters of his system like this before. He hadn’t even thought of himself as a system before, not exactly.

After his date with Danny, Tim had hesitantly, nervously brought it up to his therapist. He had been worried that he might be infantilized because of it or, worse, she would suggest that he be put on medication to try and get rid of the other parts of him. Luckily, there had been none of that. She had asked a lot of questions, including if next time she could speak with either Caroline or Alvin, and had promised to send him some research to read. Most of her focus was about how he was coping with this revelation and what they could do to make it easier for him.

It had actually been, well, therapeutic.

Go figure.

Something else that she had suggested was to give Caroline and Alvin time ‘out’, or fronting. She expressed some concern that not allowing those parts of himself to be realized could keep him from settling himself in other aspects. Which… made sense. Since Alvin was proving a no show in all ways, Tim decided to focus on Caroline. Besides, she was the one who started this revelation in motion.

To that end he had both a bottle of white wine that he chilled before setting on the counter next to several take out menu options. There was also a box of fancy chocolates; a variety of flavored truffles. Tim didn’t actually know what Caroline would like for those, but he’d made his best guess. (He could always eat the rest.) Last of all, there was a little self-care package with a face mask, mani and pedicure items, and a bath bomb.

Going with the only way that he knew to pull out Caroline for sure, he headed to the bathroom, pulled out the bag of make-up, and carefully applied some lipstick. Subtle eyeshadow, mascara, Tim could feel Caroline ‘waking up’ and himself being pulled back. It was like when he’d stayed up too late and the heavy pull of sleep was grabbing at him. Instead of fighting it—something he would normally do if he was going to be on mission and needed to retain details—Tim let the change happen.

Caroline pressed her lips together, setting the lipstick a little more firmly in place. It was a lighter color than she might prefer, but it wasn’t unattractive on her. She covered up the bags under her eyes a little (Tim really needed more sleep) and added a bit of highlighting before she called the look done. It was just enough to make her feel right, which is what mattered.

She stripped off Tim’s boring clothing, tossed it towards the hamper, and went hunting for her own things. As she clasped her bra behind her, she let out a soft breath of air. It was a relief to have it on. It made it easier to look at herself in the mirror or think about what to wear. Still having a poor selection, she ended up in an old pair of Tim’s exercise shorts (which were short enough due to Tim having grown a bit) and one of Alvin’s large t-shirts.

Wandering out to main living space, the sight of the gifts that Tim had left made her smile. It was sweet of him, really. She had to hunt for a corkscrew first, but soon had the wine open and was pouring herself a generous glass. She corked the bottle and put it back in the fridge for now.

Glass of wine in hand, she put the chocolates carefully in her self-care basket and took the whole thing over to the couch. She had to give that to Tim, his couch was wonderful. She stretched out as she found something mindless to put on while she enjoyed the wine and chocolate. When she got up to get herself a second glass of wine, she put in a food order. It was a bit of a wait for the sushi to come, but she was looking forward to getting to just sit and enjoy the food. Maybe she would even enjoy it the bath and really relax.

Since it would be some time until food, Caroline sat down to paint her nails. Her previous efforts were were gone, picked off absently by Tim, but there were still little flecks that she cleaned off. She had just started on applying the new color to her toenails, toes carefully spread by the little foam things, when there was a knock at the door. Surprised yet pleas that her food was earlier than expected, she carefully hopped up off the couch and duck walked over to the door.

It wasn’t her food.

Well, there was food, but it was being held in the hands of one Dick Grayson.

There was a flash of surprise across his face that he worked to hide quickly behind one of his sunny smiles. “Hey, Tim! It’s been a while since we talked, so I thought I’d stop by with tacos from that place you really like!”

Translation: Tim has been out of contact for too long and how his big brother was worried.

Caroline expected to feel Tim stirring and rising up to take charge. But he wasn’t. He was so tucked away that she didn’t even think he was aware that his brother had come to visit.

Well, fuck.

“So,” Dick said, drawing the word out, “can I come in?”

“Yes, right,” Caroline said—mumbled really—and backed up to let Dick in through the door.

Dick headed right for the kitchen island, setting down the plastic bags and pulling them open. “So… playing around with a new look, Tim?”

It was an out. She could try and pretend that was it. That she was Tim. She could even brush it off as doing some undercover work soon for one of Tim’s friends and practicing his look so that it would be just right. It was a Tim enough thing to do.

It would work.

And Dick would go away never knowing she was there.

“Tim?”

Caroline snapped her head up. She took a breath and forced herself to uncross her arms and stop curling in on herself. “Sorry, what?”

“Just… are you okay? You know you can talk to me about stuff, right Tim?”

“Caroline.”

Well, fuck.

She crossed her arms again. Her freshly painted nails tapped in a sharp staccato against her arm. The emerald green flashed in the lights. Resisting the urge to fidget further, she looked out the window and the beautiful view that Tim’s apartment had.

It was easier than looking at Dick.

“Okay,” Dick said slowly, carefully. Like he thought Tim—she—might run. “Is that what you’d rather be called now? Or… at least right now? You know it’s okay if you’re trans, right? It won’t change your place with the family.”

Caroline shook her head. If only it was that simple. Tim wasn’t… was she even? She had always been a she, since as long as she had existed, but Tim’s body, this body wasn’t…

“Hey, Tim, come on, you’re worrying me here baby bird,” Dick said. Caroline heard him come over towards her, but didn’t look up at him until he put his hands gently on her arms. “Talk to me, Tim.”

Caroline searched Tim’s brother’s eyes. Still unsure what to do. What if she was too much? He wouldn’t hate Tim, but he could still hate her.

“Caroline.” She at least wanted to be called her own damn name.

“Caroline,” Dick said in that same gentle tone. “Talk to me, Caroline.”

“DID, or OSSD,” the words slipped free without her permission, tumbling out from that place she hid herself in like a wound that was finally allowed to bleed. “That stands for other specified dissociative disorder. It’s Caroline because I’m not Tim right now. He’s, hum, retreated? He’s giving me a night out. His—our? The therapist that we see thought that it might be good for us if we did that some, so he’s more away than normal and—I’m getting ahead of myself. I’m one of his Alters. There’s also Alvin but he’s not around as much. I don’t think he really cares to be.”

“Okay… okay Caroline. Can you take a deep breath for me?”

Caroline rolled her eyes, but did as Dick asked. As much as she hated to admit it, it did help. She hated that she needed the help. She wasn’t supposed to panic like that. Caroline was always supposed to be calm, know what to say, and be in control of the room.

But this was Dick.

This was their Tim’s family.

This was harder.

“That’s good, Caroline,” Dick said, smiling a little quirk of a smile. “Now, is it okay if I give you a hug?”

What? “Yes?”

As soon as she agreed, Dick pulled her into a hug. She just about melted into it. Slowly and uncertainly, Caroline wrapped her arms around Dick and hugged him back. It was odd. (It was wonderful.)

“…I don’t think I’ve ever been hugged before,” Caroline admitted in a whisper.

“Well, we’re going to have to fix that!” Dick chirped. “No little sister of mine is going without hugs.”

“Little sister?”

“Yeah, I mean, you’re part of Tim,” Dick said as he pulled back enough to look her in the eyes, “so, I guess I just thought that would mean you’re my little sister?”

“Oh.”

“If you hate that thought—”

“No! No,” she said, the repeat more firm. She took a breath and stepped back. She needed the room to think. “I think that I rather like that idea. Or I will, but only if you think though that no one else will mind. I don’t want to cause problems between Tim and his family.”

“It’s your family too.”

“Can it be when no one knows I’ve been around?”

“Even then,” Dick said instantly and confidently. He squeezed her arms lightly. “Think how many people we’ve added to our family? You’re just, officially, going to be another one added.”

“That… can we wait on that?” Caroline asked. She hated the waver in her voice. “I don’t think that I’m ready for the whole family to know. It’s still new for me to be so in charge like this. Tim is normally right there, watching and able to assume control when the mission is over or there’s no further need for me.”

“There doesn’t need to be a need.”

A smile tugged at Caroline’s lips. It was cute how adamant Dick was about that. Wrong, but cute.

“Well… for right now, we have tacos to enjoy and sushi on the way. We could… sit and eat and talk? Tim bought me a lovely bottle of white if you’d like a glass?” Caroline offered with an uncertain hope fluttering in her chest.

Dick grinned. “Yeah? You’re okay with me crashing your relax night?”

“I’d in fact love it.”

[maniaeofmadness]

I am a firm believer that Stan and Mabel are not the "dumber" twins. They just aren't as interesting in 'nerd' stuff like Ford and Dipper are.

Stan was able to rebuild like 90% of the portal with only the 1 of the journals, most likely having to teach himself advanced mathematics and scientific theories to even understand what the thing is. It barely took him a few weeks to get the portal up and running after getting the other two journals. Not to mention how he was able to create a business and keep people entertained at his day job. The man is smart.

Mabel is able to create sweaters at the drop of a hat. If you don't know anything about knitting, it takes a lot of math and planning to be able to make a sweater, and Mabel is constantly making them for everyone around her. She made a full 2 act puppet shows with musical numbers and sets and well made puppets in like a week. She may not be interested in the 'nerd' stuff like Dipper, but she's creative and thinks in innovative ways.

Both of them are amazingly charismatic. They can make friends and bond with those around them easily, whether it be for business purposes like Stan or simply childlike positivity like Mabel.

They aren't dumb.

[miiuxue]

grilled cheese

[malenjoyer]

Taking my son out for enrichment

[hkthatgffan]

The image used in the background of the Gravity Falls logo HAS BEEN FOUND!!

It's located in France!!

I made a thread on Twitter explaining the full story and how I even asked Ian Worrel and Alex Hirsch about it, but lemme run down quickly how it was found and where it is!

After 3 years of searching with some friends on and off, we had no real luck. I've been working on a video about it for a while but decided to try one more time. My friend @trickengf suggested looking at international logos as they may have more of the image available and sure enough...we found logos like the Japanese and Russian GF logo had more visible detail of the image.

From that, Tricken made a remake of the image and used it to find it. He ended up finding the source at about 3AM for me, lol!

My friend Fried Oreos then confirmed the image was old enough to fit the criteria of pre GF pilot, by determining the image was on the Textures website it was sourced from since 2008!

Then, my friend Alex M managed to buy the HD image and we were able to analyze its metadata for more info!

Turns out, the image, called "LandscapeMountains0009," was taken by a Nikon D70 camera on April 18, 2007!

THE GRAVITY FALLS LOGO IMAGE IS ALMOST 18 YEARS OLD!!

From there, we began looking for the location. The meta data had no location, but other images taken around the same time showed signs of maybe the location being in Europe.

After over a day of searching, Tricken, Alex M and Oreos FOUND IT!!

The location of the image is a mountain range near the town of Sers, France...near the border with Spain.

Exact coordinates of the closest viewable angle of the image is 42°54'23.2"N 0°06'05.6"E

This is a major discovery and one I cannot believe we did. While this search was started by me in 2021 with some friends, it was TrickenGF, Alex M and Fried Oreos who deserve all the credit for this discovery! They were the geniuses who tracked all of this down and were able to connect the dots to get to this point.

You guys are amazing and I am beyond grateful for all of this.

Finding this image means that fans can now recreate the Gravity Falls logo as they want with anything they want. For example, Tricken made this for me using the image :D

Or, you can do this, lol

We now have it!

For 12 years as we looked at the Gravity Falls logo...we were in reality looking at a mountain in France...NOT Oregon!

So, I guess this is a major W for France but sorry, Pacific Northwest, Gravity Falls is actually French, lol!

I still can't believe we found this. I'm so happy :P

[mid-knight-black]

No one, and I mean no one, will ever be more fond of Buck & his yapping than Eddie “Heart Eyes” Diaz 🥹

Also on a completely unrelated note, Eddie to Chris about his late wife: “To be honest, she did most of the talking. I was just happy to be near her.”