#a girl a boy and everything else
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Alright, I've updated 'A Girl, A Boy, And Everything Else,' here's a snippet:
“Hey, Katniss,” someone murmurs. “Wake up, little bird.”
“Dad?” she whispers in bewilderment.
The other person laughs. “What? No, it’s Peeta. It’s dinner time. I made your favourite.”
“Bread?” She replies, rubbing at her eyes.
“No, not—I mean yes, of course I made bread. But I meant stew, with dried plums. I didn’t have any lamb but,” by then her eyes are open enough to catch him shrugging. “I tried.”
She smiles indulgently at him. She’s feeling rested and lazy so she stretches a careless hand across the space between them to caress his forearm.
“I love stew,” she mumbles.
Peeta smiles at her, “I know. It’ll get cold though, or Haymitch will eat it all, take you pick.”
“Mm, okay.” She closes her eyes while Peeta laughs at her. “My dad used to call me that.”
“What? Haymitch? That’s weird.”
“No,” she smiles. “Little bird. Birdie. It was one of my nicknames.”
“Oh” Peeta’s tone has taken a serious turn. “I can stop, I had no idea.”
Katniss opens her eyes again. “No, no, it’s not a bad thing. My dad had a million nicknames for me. He was that type of guy, you know? He just gave you a name and never said your real name again. Unless it was something serious, I guess. Like ‘Katniss Everdeen, you listen to you mother, you hear?’ that type of stuff.”
“Was that your impression of what a man’s voice sounds like? Yikes.” She laughs loudly at that, mostly from surprise while Peeta snickers. “Good thing you’ve never tried to do me.”
“No, I can! Give me a sec.” She makes a big deal out of clearing her throat. “Would you like a cheese bun?”
Peeta laughs, “I don’t sound like that at all!”
“Yes, you do,” she insists. “I swear it on anything.”
“Darn, I should probably do something about that then.” He smiles at her indulgently, and time must be flying by, she thinks, there’s no way they aren’t just smiling at each other for way too long, but it doesn’t feel awkward. It’s nice.
“You wanna go eat now?” Peeta whispers.
She stretches out a little, smiling at him because she doesn’t want to get up if he keeps her company. “Fine.”
#the hunger games#everlark#thg#peeta mellark#katniss everdeen#fanfic#katniss and peeta#a girl a boy and everything else
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if i think about the hunger games in peeta's perspective i WILL start sobbing
#imagine you're a boy who's going to die. you're in love with the girl you've been watching from afar. you know your fate.#you just want to help her‚ but then there's the announcement and she's here in front of you‚ kissing you‚ risking her life for you and you#think‚ i could live and i could love. you think she loves you when she hands you the berries‚ when she puts them in her mouth.#then you both survive and you go back home and nothing is real anymore. you have nothing. no family. no friends. no love. just an empty#house. a drunk for a neighbor. the love of your life walking into somebody else's arms. you think‚ i survived the games. i could survive#this. and you also think‚ i should've bit down on those berries‚ should've felt the juice burst before i died.#and then the third quarter quell announcement rings in your ears and you think‚ she will live and i will die as i should have in the first#place. the girl you love kisses you on the beach and somewhere you heart stirs and your mind revolts and you savor every touch she has ever#given to you‚ in front of the cameras and off. because you are a tribute and you are always being watched and snow's presence looms and#you think‚ i know she cares. but you get taken. you get drugged. you get tortured‚ your mind altered. the girl is a mutt‚ a murderer. she's#everything you despise‚ your mind stirs. your heart revolts. you gain more awareness but cannot distinguish reality from fiction and you#have never known katniss' love. the war ends. you heal. you come home. you plant primrose for her. years down the line‚ you grow in love#more than you thought possible. but some days‚ you cannot tell fiction from reality so you ask the love of your life‚ you love me.#real or not real? and she says‚ real‚ and kisses you.#and you sigh and kiss her back and revel in this. a home. a life. a love.#lit#the hunger games#everlark#otp: real or not real?#katniss everdeen#peeta mellark#text#tais toi lys#thgpost
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what draws you back to your country what draws you back to your land when i was a kid i told myself if i ever left iran i'd never go back 2 years into living in the UK i started looking at news on iran again 10 years in and i visited it for the first time again and today i heard an iranian mother talk in farsi to her child on the train to london the way my mother used to and i wanted to cry i wanted to ask her whether they're still cutting the mountaintops whether the lakes are still drying today i showed the person i was with pictures of waterfalls and palaces and forests and snow-white north something odd pulls me back with increasing force i can't ignore it ever again
#i just dont know how else to tell you everything !!! santoor from a different room the large family gathering the black tea with saffron#drank out of delicate glass and gold vessels cold marble on hot nights big stars big rivers big mountains#visible from busy tehran roads the ease of conversation tension eased by sarcasm tall tall cliffsides you drive by#rushing to put on headscarves before the head teacher comes in a rave by the base of damavand massive sun pastel purple skies#disjunct architecture trucks on road sides with fresh fruits pomegranates watermelons oranges everywhere#the smell of golpar on tangerines beautiful girls in tehran holding hands bautiful boys in kermanshah speaking kurdish the janky#cars on the verge of breakdown held together by love caspian sea lighting up in spring staying up into the morning on noruz#my friends uncle sang and played setar his son played the violin a little fear a lot of love remnants of something#grand carved into the cliffside everything feels bigger taller the landscape swallows you it smells like#illegally imported wine and orange blossoms and auntie's tahchin soaking your eyes in warm tea when youre sick#tomatoes and salt concrete and stone something mandmade and something raw new flag old resilience#the anger getting to us bruised eyes big grin all i know is the north i feel sorry my mother asks if id be okay#if they got a place in tajikistan we love each other enough dont we? when we look in the mirror we see each other. theres a love letter#across the border and it says I MISS YOU IM GLAD YOURE DOING BETTER itll never be the same im not okay with it at all there are no more#stars i miss jumping over big fires i miss our fireworks im sorry we cant be happy anymore everyone#leaves the mint and rosewater and sunlight for a reason.#it's not pride it's just generational regret
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don't forget to plug your robot partners in before bed otherwise they're gonna be on battery saver in the morning and we all know how sluggish and cranky they get :3
#freak#freak4freak#actually mentally ill#t4t#fluff#robogender#robot#robot girl#robot boy#robot everything else idk I charge all my bitches
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#WHEN THEY TRY TO TURN YOU INTO A BAD BOY BUT YOU ARE A BABY GIRL AT HEART#TRYING TO JOKE AROUND BECAUSE EVERYTHING ELSE ABOUT THIS SCENE MADE ME WANT TO CLIMB THE WALLS OF MY APARTMENT LIKE A RABID GECKO#monica watches last twilight#jimmy jitaraphol
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Have tutu on in the background while I work on other stuff and it’s cracking me up how drosselmeyer talks about fakir like his fatal flaw is being afraid to die when frankly that’s most normal thing about him. The boy is absolutely batshit off his rocker in countless other directions. Keeping another boy as a pet is normal in drossy’s books but god forbid his grandson be a pussy
#listen not wanting to be torn to pieces is normal boy behavior#everything else… is. not#anyways hello sleepy girl posting#sleepy sleepy girl should be in bed#sleepy sleepy girl does not want to sleep yet though it’s pushing 4 in the morning#princess tutu
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Homelander is such a cool and terrifying villain, but my favourite part about him is how he's just terrorizing his coworkers
#what makes him an amazing character is that hes not terrifying bc of his powers#hes terrifying bc he will smile at a little girl and tell her that everythings gonna be alright and then leave her to die#hes terrifying bc he will pretend to be sad and lie to the media to make himself look the best possible#hes terrifying bc he probably thinks that hes doing good#also he has this fucking weird and uncanny childishness about him#while being patronizing to everyone#probably bc hes a manchild who thinks hes above everyone else#but my first thought was that he must be some kinda clone or alien or smth#the boys#homelander
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i don’t think a character has ever polarized me as much as geto has. i will hate on that mfer without a lick of shame but let me see ONE fanart of him and
#he’s so UGHHHHH but i just Do Not like his character#at least post defection#bc oh you massacred an entire village started a cult and tried to manipulate a fragile 16 year old into a murder machine??? ok#pre defection that’s my baby my angel my sweet boy#but cult leader geto is just. No??#design wise yes but everything else boy GET the fuck outta here#that’s why i like kenjaku better bc he actually makes the look work#if you don’t believe me look at the difference between jjk0 geto and s2 kenjaku. goodnight#and also a bit irked by his fans constantly bringing him up in conversations about gojo……#like ok. we get it you think jjk is a BL drama. whatever can we move on now#like who called yall LMAOOOOO#n e ways geto my pookie bear my baby angel <3<3<3 i h8 his ass so much i was laughing when yuta black flashed him into next tuesday#and those lil girls he adopted?? BROOOO when sukuna killed them that was my reason for living#like YESSSS GET THEM AGAIN FOR ME KING!!!#they served no purpose and they were annoying goodbye#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#geto suguru#suguru geto#also stsg shippers dni#bc ew#no#makes sense. does not compel me at all#i Do Not want to see it 😌
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Last arcane episode ever..... here we fucking go....
#50 MINUTES YEAAAAHHH!! IM SO GLAD THEY HAVE BEEN GETTING LONGER THERE WAS NO WAY!!!#the last drop no..... YEEEEEEEEEEES EKKO!!!!!! OH MY GOOOOOD YEEEEEEEES always a dance with you OOOOOOOOHHHHH she even has the same hair 😭#is she gonna build the new zaun for isha.... like vander wanted for vi and powder.... 😭😭😭 with ekko 😭😭😭#watching jinx kill herself over and over is something else that was so funny.... im sorry but ajdkansk#WHATS WITH THOSE CUTS WHATS GOING ON.... WDYM WE ARE MEANT TO LOSE THIS FIGHT??? IN THE FUTURE HE SAW RIGHT???#OH ITS THAT GIRL VI IS CARRYING OMG BUT SHE IS LOOKING FOR JINX!!! NOOO SHE FUCKING DIEEED AMBESSA IS A BEAST!!! DID THEY GET CAIT???#VANDER NOOOO OOOH ITS VIKTOR TOO!!ITS OOOOOOVER maddie being there still..... a consensual workplace relationship... cait....#LORIS!!!! VIIIIIIIIIIIII caitlyn looks so good..... and vi too.... but did they run out of armors.... the guy who left his family DIED TOO!!#caitlyn that was so hot.... they got her.... MADDIE!!!! WHAT THE FUUUUUUCK I THOUGHT THAT WOULD NOT EEEEEVER HAPPEN!!! AK WITH HER OWN GUN!#OH MY GOD MEL!!! MADDIE EXECUTED FOR HER CRIMES!!!! i know people are cheering!!! JINX ON HER BLIMP!!! the egg was a distraction.....#jayce be ready for your divorce.... THE HALO!!! THE VOICE!!! his voiced softened when he said to see you omg... SEVIKA NOOOOOOOOO#cait and mel joining forces to maximize their joint (literal) slay against ambessa.... and vi and jinx vs vander.... cruel#beef squashed..... no way she died????? omg... we havent seen caits left side.... and she was bleeding.... one fear. VIKTOR IS SO TALL!!!#how does it feel to look up jayce.... also jinx saying they are always together 🥺🥺 they are flying again.... omg jinx looks so scared...#OH NOOOOOO SEE CAIT HURT HER EYEE viktor saying they want better lives but emotion clashes with reason after a season of just that.... omg#series thesis.... this is actually so meta if i may say so.... vander and silco.... jinx and vi and the rocket... cait and ambessa....#and finally jayce saving viktor.... and jayce searching for the arcane after he was saved as a kid.... all of it..... ALL OF IT....#THE BOY SAVIOR!!!! VIKTOR IS BACK!!!! HE WANTS HIS PARTNER BACK OMG#YES THE MAGE IS VIKTOR!!!! OH MY GOOOD!!! ONLY YOU CAN SHOW ME THIS! CAITVI FUCKED ON SCREEN AND SOMEHOW THIS IS GAYER!!!#JAYCE!!! YOU ARE ALRIGHT!!! EKKO MADE THAT WITH AN INVERSION OF JAYCES RUNE!! OF COURSE!!! THE WTO MEN AND THE ANOMALY!!!#they are literally adam and steve... VI OMG!!!! SHE CANT TAKE IT NOOOOOO JINX AND VANDER!!!! NOOOO EKKO ALONEEEE NOOOO#SEVIKA COUNCIL MEMBER!!! CAIT GAVE HER HER SEAT!!! AND SINGED AND HIS DAUGHTER!!! MEL WHAT THE HELL!!! BACK TO NOXUS???#caitlyn seeing that jinx escaped through the air ducts... yeah..... she is on that blimp#can you believe we ended arcane with two happy lesbians..... like everything went to hell jayce and viktor saved it and disappeared....#through it all one thing remained.. two lesbians in love <3 can we get an applause for two lesbians in love.... they made a band about this#(love of lesbian)#talking tag#watching arcane#watching arcane season 2#you know towards the end the characters looked a lot more like normal 3d animated... idk how to explain it
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ratcatcher (1999) dir lynne ramsay
#ratcatcher#film#something about that introverted guilt-ridden boy chosing to show is affection and care towards this older girl who gets terrorized by the#local boys by imitating his mother#it's so unconcerned despite everything else
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i think growing up is just life repeatedly sucker punching you and saying bitch you thought things were gonna better lmao no you're so naive and stupid for having hope in 20 years the world will be flaming bag of garbage and no matter how hard you work you'll get eliminated at some point
#and then you just have to get up and keep living anyway because what else is there to do?#but man my heart keeps feeling heavier with every blow#2024 has literally been the worst year ever god personally too#like everytime i think it can't possibly get worse than this it does#i remember literally 9th jan i had such a horrible breakdown in an auto because the first friend i ever made#after school was leaving my work and therefore my life#9 days into the year. seriously. and i was so happy on 8th because it was my birthday#i don't know im trying hard to think okay this doesn't even affect me it's fine im privileged enough that even my own countrys politics#barely affects me#but just. india is already so behind in everything. if developed nations are doing shit like this then well#it will never get better right like who do we even strive to be#i want to get more into indian politics but my god. it's so horrifying and depressing all the time#like i remember resolving to follow politics closely few years ago and the first news#i read was about some minister talking about how girls skirts lengths IN SCHOOL is the reason boys do sa and boys will be boys etc etc#i know i could just follow business news stuff like that god knows it'll help in my field but it just. doesn't resonate with me doesn't#make me feel anything at all. like i so desperately want to care about ooh stock markets and how to grow your money etc etc#but when i think about being rich enough to invest idle money all i can think is sitting in my own home peacefully#drinking a glass of cold coffee and just being able to breathe freely because me and my sister used to joke in childhood#when dad went thru a coffee v bad for health phase and he wouldn't let us drink it so we would drink it very sneakily#at night when he was asleep or went out for an hour and make absolutely no noise while mixing the sugar. we said that we know#we'll* know we have achieved true freedom and happiness in life when we can peacefully drink cold coffee in the hall and not secretly#in the dead of night in our room#i don't even know what im talking about and my period is late again and nothing is working and my lazer focus#that i had built in the past few weeks is gone because suddenly im like what is the point????#i just don't understand how the fuck humans can fight over stupid fucking things like who is kissing who and who is doing what with their#body instead of focusing on collective issues like our planet is dying so fucking fast and every summer is getting impossibler to survive#i hate that the united states control the UN fuck this world fr man i hate being born in such horrible helpless times#like call me a kid or dumb or whatever but i cannot understand how MILLIONS of people do not#have sympathy for ppl around them and who don't care about the planet at all like how????? how did you grow up????#not trying to boast but this is so natural to me!!! didn't you make save water save earth posters in school!!! didn't anyone
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in line to the bathroom just to cry!!
#random thoughts#gender dysphoria.#felt it especially this morning when some lady from this organization that worked with our school called me christine.#CHRISTINE.#do i honestly look like a christine??#(not her fault but still.)#but she kept fucking misgendering me. i bet it was the shirt i was wearing.#normally i wear more layers so as to make my body less. shaped.#BUT I RAN OUT OF NICE ONES AND SO I HAD TO WEAR ANOTHER.#it used to be my favorite shirt but now it is not. i hate it.#either it is too small for me or i am too large for it. and either way i want to fucking stab myself because of it#augh. wanted to cry earlier. but didn't.#still sort of do when i think about it. i get misgendered often but. augh.#and the comment my mother made a while ago. about. how can i be a boy if all my friends are girls?#WELL SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU HAVE NOT MET HALF THE BOYS IN MY SCHOOL. FUCKING IDIOT DUMBASS. HAVE YOU NO COMMON SENSE#TO KNOW THAT TIMES ARE CHANGING AND WE ARE NOT STUCK IN YOUR WARPED PERCEPTION OF GENDER NORMS?? HELLO??#i hate my body so much unironically. if i could fix it somehow.#i have been trying to fix it so hard for so long but it hasn't fucking worked and it's gone in the OPPOSITE WAY. and i am RUINING MY BODY.#AND I FUCKING HATE IT.#sometimes it feels as if nothing is good. i want to shave my head again and be perpertually ugly.#i need new hair.#i need to fix everything.#please.#i have no motivation to do it but i need to do it.#i know i'm a boy. i just want to be a boy for everyone else.
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also about the aunt poll im surprised so many people think that a girl born in the 90s wasnt almost forced to do ballet ngl
#like gender norms back then were very clear for kids: its dancing and ponies and pink for girls#and everything else ever for boys#gio talks
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i fully believe if my maternal grandma had known what being trans was, she would've been trans
#she told me repeatedly how she wished she was a boy growing up and that she used to hide her girl clothes in a drainage pipe#so she could dress up as a boy at school and when she was out of the house#she had short hair all her life too and was very Butch which i guess could mean nothing but coupled with everything else...#like....i'm no scholar but as a trans person that sure sounds like being trans to me#txt
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I’m so normal about her
#also I love her very dearly#tanya dead boy detectives#Tanya the Nak Mother Ghost#Pornsak Pichetshote said here’s a 90s goth girl who feels guilty about and blames her self for everything#I said thank you I love her#dead boy detectives#I wish Tanya had a last name#I open my tablet and then just draw crystal or Tanya#my favorite hobby is making content for myself#(that’s a joke for the record I think artist referring to themselves as content creators leads to very toxic mindsets#and that the point of art isn’t to create anything for anyone else but yourself <3)#Cy’s art
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traitor to the cause forgets national holiday every year KILL HIM
#just realized i wrote may instead of marsh lmao. fuck it#trans day of visibility#trans day of eating food#tdov#tdov 2024#transgender day of visibility#trans#transgender#lgbt#gay#my art#another year eh#still in pretransition purgatory (get me tf out!!!)#idk man past year's been bad. last time i showered was july i'm goin 9 months strong 9 months weak 9 months decrepit#i manage to go through the motions with not much else in the way of progress. eat sleap shit piss rinse reuse recycle#trans day of eating food is shaky too this year. just found out yesterday i can't eat a snack anymore that i've liked since i was a kid#discovered a new love for green beans though. everything in balance#with my living situation getting more unsafe i've been thinking a lot about asking my neighbor if i can stay with him and his family#cause i don't like... see people other than them anymore so i don't know anyone else i can ask lol#and maybe i can get my shit together and start transitioning if i get out..... it's the least i need to do anyways#at least i gotta ask if he would be willing to oversee my funeral in the event of it cause i do nnnnot trust my next of kin with that shit#go watch youtube “Protecting Trans Bodies in Death” by Caitlin Doughty. contains important info for anyone really but#especially so for the titular transengendered individual#write your will... OK?#it doesn't have to be a bummer do it with a friend make it a girls night boys night hotties sleepover#death mention cw#wish i had more to say on the topic this year that wasn't a downer. i'll see what the next year holds#and hey... if a guy like me isn't giving up a motherfucker like you sure as hell shouldn't... adios & bon voyage my compatriots. SALUTE
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