#a bit personal? aw
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say hello to balin and bifur folks!!!
finally got some snuggles in with bifur, but he’s still a lot more timid than balin is. hopefully better pics of him to come soon!! but my sweet balin boy oh my GOODNESS, look at him?? posing????? hellOO?? rat model. pink eyed cutie pie. i love them both a lot and it is impossible to not be smiling when they’re on me. or when i hear em getting the zoomies in their home. GAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!! they are munching on some apple rn and it’s just. So cute. they’re so clever toooo!! completing the puzzles i’m putting in for them so quick. they loOooOve snuggling up and i’m!!!!!! so excited to watch them grow up :3
named after ………….
#a bit personal? aw#rat babieeeeees!!!!#bifur has light & dark hair like uhhh bifur O-O#BUUUUUT yeah anyway. These 2 babies are just what i needed rn#feeling v content. v full <3#balin & bifur
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sleep cycles
#so im getting really into the concept of how much of silver's life has been lost to sleep. um. it's delicious. awful but delicious#this poor guy. u know how the avg person u might stay up later than u should so u can rly maximize the hours? 24 isnt enough let alone 16#silver feeling every accidental nap cut that shorter and shorter. days weeks months of time built up that is gone. that he cant get back#repeating the cycle endlessly in frustration and misery and there's NOTHING he can do about it. yea#ANYWAYS im posting this on the clock but its okay we havent had a new ticket in almost an hour it should be fine#i have 2 other drawings done but tryna focus on life a bit#twst#twstファンアート#twisted wonderland#twst silver#yes there are over 20 silvers in this one post. im crazy. and?#suntails
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zutara week 2024 | #4 reverence
greeted early by his favorite sight
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giving our girl the statue we didn't see in lok
---disclaimer: the background art is taken from the show, only the statue painting + zuko drawing are mine
#i imagine he's on a visiting ship about to dock after not seeing K for months#quick bit of awe before he finally sees her in person again#zutara week 2024#zutara week#zutara#katara x zuko#zuko x katara#atla#southern water tribe#swt zutara#day 4#reverence#atla edit
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Side A
#an awful lot of checking each other out going on in this show. that’s all I’m saying.#crystal thinking 'hmm. hit that??' @ every attractive person she sees never stops being funny#yeah girl go getem. let that guy have his situationship back there#kassius does the Niko-specific heart eyes SO well though#and Niko getting appreciated in this outfit makes me unreasonably happy. a field mouse!#also for some reason. this scene reminds me very strongly of laiqualaurelote's band au#was making the set when I realised. woah. same vibes.#dead boy detectives#dbda#crystal palace#niko sasaki#charles rowland#edwin payne#kassius nelson#yuyu kitamura#fuck tagging j&g this ain’t about them#my gifs#think I’m getting the hang of gifmaking?? only my second set and I’ve figured out a full workflow :D#bit addictive once you get started
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older designs for my specialest guy
#you actually could pay me to watch boruto the payment is reviving any of madara-obito-itachi in a cheap fan service moment. itd work on me 👍#neji hyuga#hyuga neji#art#fanart#naruto#2024#i think konoha would love to project the will of fire shit onto neji after what he did. ya know. trying to give your life 'for the village'#in that way hed probs have a lot of respect from others but respect has never been enough when your life still isnt yours 😛#the pessimism would likely take a bit to return to him but it Would return hes just like. less interpersonally volatile#the realization you had two whole very public meltdowns and no one that matters cared will do that to you#anywayfor the happy ending one. i think while neji is always going to be a little bit bitchy hes bound to soften up a lot when he's not#under constant stress and has to micromanage his every thought#i like to think that if he were allowed to hed grow into a very outwardly warm person. sunflower :)#and my general opinions of neji and boruto are:#1. yes it is a blessing to not be made to be straight married#2. however consider: what if i wanted to see neji be a dad. i dont care for romantic njten but i do not hate it. it would be acceptable#when i think abt this guy in boruto hes chronically single but still.talking about what CANON could be. it would be acceptable#3. yes hiashi shouldve gotten his ass killed in the war but i would be lying if i said the awful family reunions#are not fun as a concept#are they fun on purpose? no#but the rule is: A situation can suck if it sucks on purpose#and 4. i know about the time travel episode i have mixed feelings on it.#anyway no hate if you like boruto i like being hyperbolic for fun but its just anime. the kids seem cute#but if any other hyuga-brained person ever wants to get unimaginably angry you should also watch the hiashi birthday episode of boruto#thats my special recommendation from me to you
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I can't get over that last scene from this episode. that long pause where sam was quietly grabbing a drink and you could barely hear celia talking to jack as she put him to bed in the other room. nothing was happening in that moment that needed to be recorded. no terrible events no big revelations. just sam and celia quietly going about their lives, sharing a domestic moment.
as something watched and listened. and we don't know why it's listening.
#ramblings with major#the magnus protocol#tmagp#tmagp spoilers#its like. its so unsettling because a) that faint ambient music did its job Very Well#but also b) we didnt have that in tma!! anything soft and domestic was left to the imagination!!#we got a couple establishing bits from scotland and then The Mass Ritual statement was recorded for obvious reasons#upton house also had very little on tape after the statement was done#i dont think there was ever that kind of quiet slow 'fluff' scene like that in tma#and there was always some reason things were being recorded. usually someone was aware of a tape being on#now theres just colin being colin and everyone else is only vaguely aware that their Computers are listening#no one knows about the phones not really. or the personal laptops. or the nanny cams.#and this is just. so much more unsettling. i love it sm it feels So invasive and awful ough
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I've been doing a lot of reflection as of late, especially after this past class.
This past class was about the Torah and Tanakh in general, and the way the rabbi talked about the commandments (specifically the ten commandments) has made me really reflect on how I interpret them, specifically the fifth commandment, or honoring your mother and father.
This is a commandment I have wrestled with for a long time - in fact, it brought me away from g-d at multiple times. I was severely abused when I was incredibly young by my mother, and I used to feel insulted at the implication that I were to honor her while she got to live a better life. It was hypocritical, in my eyes.
But this rabbi surmised that this particular commandment was because parenthood is an act of creation, something that is like the g-d from which we come from. My realization is this: I don't think we're necessarily meant to take even these commandments literally.
I this particular commandment is more of a call to honor creation - creation is a gift, and like any gift, many people simply will not like it and will discard it. The person who abused me created me, but she did not honor creation. She didn't honor me, but I can still honor it.
I have started to honor creation much more. I'm too young, too unstable, not mature enough to be a father (though I fantasize about it), but I create all the time. I create relationships, I create with my hands through crochet. I create memories, I create my world. And I can honor who I am and where I came from that made me who I am. I've been learning one of the mother tongues of my family (Italian, since part of my family originates there) and it was judaism that inspired me to do this.
I don't think g-d wants me to honor my abuser. I think He wants me to remember the Holy action of creation. When I am a father, that act of creation will be Holy, and indeed, I am already joyful about the thought.
I have seen many people struggle with this particular commandment, but I think this perspective helps me personally. I don't think I ever have to forgive my abusers (plural), and I don't think I am commanded to simply because they happened to be family. I am commanded to recognize the holy, to elevate the mundane. In doing so, I will remember g-d. Through creation, I honor g-d and everything he has done for us, for me, and for our collective people.
#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#personal thoughts tag#abuse tw#i am not sharing this for the sake of pity and i also ask not to be told to divulge my abuse story. that isn't relevant#i have been needing to engage with this topic for a long time though and judaism has helped me a bit in navigating healing#but i decided to share this publicly in the hopes it will help other survivors specifically of familial/parental abuse#i know how it feels (in general). it's so lonely and you can really harbor (understandable) baggage about this particular commandment#i have a meeting with My Rabbi (sponsoring rabbi) and i might bring this up. we've only spoken once face-to-face (zoom)#so that might be really Intense to bring up to him but he is very kind and i trust him (which is why he is My Rabbi)#and he has already told me that he WANTS me to wrestle with g-d and His word *with* him#again i am posting this publicly so i can document my thoughts and keep them straight but also with the hope it MIGHT help others#if it even *casually* inspires another survivor i will feel so grateful (though it is THEIR achievement and not mine to claim)#i want us to survive. i want us to eat well. i want us to smile#i will say that this must be a very sudden whiplash in tone from my last post about sex. from sex to awful horrific abuse#my stream of consciousness is just Like This though in the sense that i have very sudden realizations and tonal whiplashes#so you're just getting a very frank look into how my brain is structured and what my brain thinks are important enough to think about#if i seem much more verbose it's because i needed to write this on my laptop which makes typing and more importantly yapping even *easier*
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pyramid game is such a perfect little drama for the sapphics because you've got a whole demented psychological thriller going on about high school girls creating a whole fake social class system that results because one bored little princess bitch thought it'd be funny, and you've got all these dynamics that can only be boiled down to some kind of love story because like. ye lim and eun jeong's dynamic? the princess idol and her athlete bodyguard. soo ji and ja eun's dynamic? the cold mastermind and the compassionate heart. even whatever da yeon and seol ha have got going on? typical hitter and loyal dog dynamic. the list can go on.
#caroline talks#pyramid game#like da yeon is an awful person but as soon as seol ha spoke up. like her first words were about how she hates ha rin#for having da yeon in the palm of her hand. like. okay. gay.#i also think a lot about ha rin and ja eun. like i despise ha rin so much but there's something distinctly gay about that behavior.#oh you see ja eun happy? you're obsessed that ja eun's happy? and now you want to ruin her for it?#i know that deeper down it's all a commentary about social class and how the uber wealthy and uber powerful will find new and creative ways#to screw over people who come from different socioeconomic backgrounds. because at the end it's really all about power#and how ha rin cannot fucking STAND not being seen as the silent ruler of the class#this got away from me. yes it's all about power.#it is also a bit about gay lust. it can be both <3
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you are so whimsical i qant to check out this mdzs (..??) because of your whimsical nature thank you sorry im very high and your art moved me emotionally
This is simultaneously the sweetest and funniest thing someone has sent me, thank you.
#ask#non-mdzs#I have a hunch you will not recall sending this to me but I wish to immortalize it.#The progression of me going 'aw' to 'barking with laughter' at the last bit of this message was a delight.#Oh man what to say about getting into MDZS...#I admit I'm probably low on the list of people who should be recommending it.#I enjoy it! But there are also a ton of different adaptations that each do a slightly different thing with the story and characters.#Personally I loved The Untamed (Netflix live action) for how campy the action was. It got emotional but really...It made me laugh.#And I love watching it with people because it also makes them laugh.#(The Untamed changes a lot of plot elements so it isn't looked upon very favourably by many fans. I love it as its own thing)#Don't get me wrong; it *is* a story with interesting things to say and I certainly have written tons of analysis on it.#But it's also a series I spent over a year making parody comics of. It comes from a place of love!#The audio drama is really good and I think it might be the best form of mdzs...however finding episodes is not easy.#The audio drama is also what I'm basing all these comics on!#There is a book (the primary source) An animated series and a comic to check out as well.#Someone probably has a better pitch and recommendation list than I do. I just make the funny comics.
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My controversial opinion about Hob Gadling is that I believe he’s absolutely the sort of guy that “puts things behind him”, and tries to wash his hands clean of the things he feels icky about. This is implied pretty well in the show, with him blithely moving from soldiering and robbery to printing, from slaving to… whatever it was he was doing in the 19th century instead. That being said, this is not at all the same as actively trying to atone, or even making a concerted effort to be a better person, and I really wish fandom could tell the difference!
#the amount of times I’ve seen people argue that Hob has redeemed himself and ofc feels really horrible about his role in the slave trade#but there is ZERO textual indication that’s true#in fact judging by how he acts in the 19th century and how he was after all the other shit he did that he maybeeee feels kind of sheepish#and would just like to move on thanks!#i love flawed characters and I love monstrous characters and I love hypocrites and I love friendly amoral assholes#Hob is genuinely a super compelling character and embodies the sort of greed of humanity we see in other forms in Madoc and Burgess#he’s got a more friendly face and he’s a slightly lighter version of it but sandman presents humanity as fundamentally flawed and greedy#and Hob is that to a T#I’d really love it if fandom embraced this version of Hob#making him a fluffy anti-racist progressive hip college professor is just so weird#or especially when they have him espouse progressive views… in the past???#look Hob is actual facts a worse person than the Corinthian in a lot of metrics#when I see 17th century Hob talk about the beautiful diversity of humans I just lose my mind a little#also he’s clearly a wolf of Wall Street yuppie asshole in 1984#hot take Dreamling would be more fun and spicier if people leaned into Hob’s canon traits more#both Dream and Hob are kind of awful#I actually like Hob!#but… man I do not like fanon Hob one bit
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ABOUT TO MEET 2 OF MY MUTUALS, I HOPE THEY KILL ME
#a bit personal? aw#i told my mother I was meeting some friends I met online yesterday#and she didn’t even warn me about the dangers of meeting “strangers’’ from the internet#i think I might be old :(#i look very crazy and like a pink witch basically#bc I let my hair air dry while i got myself ready#(a mistake)#HOWEVER#I’m already almost there so there is not anything I can do about this now#so i am ignoring my mean brain telling me i should rip my face off#i am very nerbous but also very excited yaaaaaay
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"A little chirpin' going on here from Tkachuk. He's still yelling at the bench, 'Hey, that's what you get! That's what you get!' And it was Hagel who got wacked along the wall, and it was Hagel that he was yelling at for the most part. [...] Yep! There's Tkachuk, he is loving it. This is his kind-of game." "Hagel obviously leaking over there on the Lightning bench. He laid a big hit on Barkov in the opening minutes of this one."
"Welp, they got the upper hand right now and Tkachuk being who he is, he's taking advantage of that. But that sets the table for tommorow night, and he dun care about that. He will be more than happy to have it go that way. See, he's still—" Matthew: That's what you get! All of that! [?] "He's talking about how sorry you're gonna be. He's talking to Guentzel and a couple other guys. Just setting the table for tommorow." "Oh, man! He is not letting up down there is he?" "Nope!"
"That's what you fucking get. That! (referring to the Kuli on Hagel hit that caused Hagel to go to the bench) That's what you fucking get."
florida panthers @ tampa bay lightning | 12.22.24
#matthew tkachuk#florida panthers#2425#naturally maffhew who saw that hagel hit on sasha in the opening minutes and just stared him down as he got on the bench#also had the chirp him at the end as if he personally laid down the hit himself#this is also kuli being very frustrated with the refs for not giving him a boarding call with girgenssons#(to which he did talk to them about it after it happened)#i love maffhew yelling so loud it gets caught on the mic#hot mic! hot mic!#at the end of the day it always leads back to sasha huh#a shame the bolts telecast didnt have a good view of the hit but sasha does wobble a bit#so yeah karma babe#mr i hate tampa more showing how much he hates tampa#i just love them going this is about hagel [zooms out to kuch and jake at the end of the bench]#mr i love kuch but i will mercilessly chirp him too#and also jake#hey babe its a shame youre in blue now because i have to cheer extensively when maffhew engages#yap off who will win sibneys daughter or guy who has found in a cardboard box wet and all alone#thank you bolts telecast for this one i had to suffer your awful commentary but you did give me this so really#it doesnt balance out at all but you knkw
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quick little fft doodle about why im up at this hour
#babbs punches in his sleep. he turns into a black belt and lashes out at anything within a foot of his personal bubble. its awful.#my ex bit in her sleep. hard. being the middle spoon wasnt fun.#adventure time#fern the human#finn mertens#huntress wizard#vanlife au#finnfern#finntress#finnferntress
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Look what came through the mail today! The letters & ( •̀ω•́ )σ 3 little gremlins from letterstoear.
Just wanna say i adore the flower stickers on the letters too much, they are that much worth mentioning.
#letterstoear#nui#twst#twisted wonderland#sebek zigvolt#malleus draconia#twst grim#mod posting#okay but i love squishing the bears with my thumb; they just have the right thickness to be pressed on#i really like the flower stickers; they look like romantically artistic wax seal#the letters are pleasantly nice#i love the part where cheka personally request for an audience with yuu thru sebek 🥺🥺🥹🥹 too cute hnggh .......#sebek becoming our little mailman for our little invitation aw 🥹 for those who wanna know the context of the letter;#i requested a letter from sebek that he sent home while he was away accompanying malleus on other country duty#my other favorite part is just him simply opening the letter with 'My love'#i'm sealed 🥹 the first paragraph is written so sweetly#i enjoy reading the letter slowly outside in peaceful afternoon today; i ran it through together with sebek nui#this will be my treasured keepsake from now on 🥹; it seriously made me miss letters and wish i have someone to send this kind of letter to#it was a bit funny how the envelope sebek's letter came from is sticked with the guys from free! sticker fhsdsh 🤣😂#and me with the white haired guy like WHo are u?? fsjdsdjsd (´つヮ⊂); but it's a really nice service#the thank you letter came with such a cute and yummy folding paper; thank you for the stickers too#i feel like there's a bit whoopsie on grim's winky eye fshfh like i think the sharpie just blurs the separating space '<' supposed to have#and just combine it all together into one angry eye; and sebek bear's eyes are just a little bigger than i expected it to be#but the more i look at them i think they are just having a little individuality & still cute#i embraced it all together while knowing the fact none of handmade thing would always be the same one with the other; hehe sebek nui has fr#i kinda forget that there's this kind of clip earring fshd; because i always get the ones that work like screw from aliexpress#i know that the literal clip one would just be literal meaning of pain fsh; just like the magnet one my father once got me when i was a kid#it was painful but pretty; tho i lost it quickly bcs magnet easily get loosed once one part of it moves around when u touch ur hair or face#anyhow i had a pleasant day because of this; thank you very much ! sebek nui said 'thank you' too! ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. ❀ ✿ 𖤣…
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Never getting over Fulcrum being a project manager...
Idk why, but something about that is so funny to me. Not just because the title of "project manager" is inherently kinda funny for a Decepticon, but also because-
1. It's vague sounding and hard to explain irl because it technically exists in multiple fields, like healthcare or manufacturing, which surely translates into canon in some way.
2. In canon, it's simultaneously a really mundane, innocuous sounding job, yet it's also a super morally awful position to reside over depending on the context. (*cough* forced colonization and cyberforming *cough*)
And 3. It solidifies the fact that behind all the surface level militaristic work we get with both the Decepticons and Autobots, there's also Cons and Bots with "normal" jobs in both factions.
Like, sure yeah we get scientists and doctors, engineers and programmers, but usually in big important or warfront positions. (For plot reasons, understandably.) But it's also really funny and interesting to think of those that worked background positions, or minor jobs.
Like an Autobot working in their equivalent of an HR department, or a Decepticon who runs one of their outpost's or starship's kitchens.
Just all the pre-war jobs that didn't just disappear with the war, but instead evolved to exist within the factions.
It's particularly funny with the Decepticons though, because it could be a super mundane job or situation, but because it's them, it has to have an air of ~e v i l~ to it, either legitimately and/or merely for the vibes, like Tarn's "performance reviews".
#theres this one comedy thing. a think its from that like. puppet comedian dude??? cant remember the name rn-#-buts theres a bit about a person in the crowd being a project manager and how silly the job sounds#at some point the person the project manager is with gets pointed out when the comedian asks smth along the lines of-#-''is he a project you're managing? he looks pretty managed to me.'' smth smth. thats fulcrum and the scavs to me#idw fulcrum#fulcrum#mtmte#tf idw#idw tarn#tarn#transformers#maccadam#Decepticons being cartoonishly evil while doing mundane shit will never not be funny to me#'i need to send an evil email to my evil boss about an evil supply chain issue involving my evil workers evil rations and evil mail'#<- fulcrum#sorry. yes he is a tragic yet simultaneously silly guy. but i will never not shut up about his stupid awful job#''he's a project manager!'' oh yay :D! ''he's overseeing the destruction and forced cyberformation of a whole planet'' ...what#not saying he deserved being turned into a bomb. but i think a solid uhh maybe 1000+ organics get a free chance to spit on him or smth#get his ass lmao. i swear hes one of my favs. its just he is objectively an asshole. and i must speak on it bcs i love him#sort of unrelated. but along the same vein of jobs and positions in the Decepticons. ive been trying to puzzle out Krok and Fulcrum's ranks#and. it might not be accurate. idk what sort of ranking system bullshit is going on in canon. so im going off what i know#but. im figuring krok was some sort of warrant-esque officer? aka. he was a general solider. who worked his way up through skill to NCO-#-then specialized in strategy to the point of becoming a warrant officer for strategy and studies. so. higher than NCO but lower than CO#so on the other hand. fulcrum is a CO. bcs he wasnt a solider. he was a technician. but also in advanced management. so. CO???#for irl comparison. NCO/Warrant = worked towards over time from low ranks. CO = fast tracked bcs of formal education or smth#(take the irl comparison with a grain of salt. im not an expert on that shit. i just considered becoming a CO bcs of pressure once)#((CO in this context stands for commissioned officer. not commanding officer btw. so. its like management shit))#(not that i think cons have commissions or anything. just using the terminology as a place holder or smth ig)#who outranks who is debatable bcs canon doesn't specify rank. but if going off this as a basis. fulc would outrank krok by a technicality#but. assumedly. battle experience is seen as more impressive and noteworthy to cons. so its more likely krok outranked fulc bcs of that
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psychonauts is a good series
#my art#wreckart#psychonauts#psychonauts 2#razputin aquato#mirtala aquato#augustus aquato#donatella aquato#frazie aquato#dion aquato#queepie aquato#bob's burgers#fought for my fucking life against my video editor to get the last bit right but i DID IT#psychonauts are really good games i think everyone should play them#im awful at video games and i 101%'d the first and plan to 102% the second soon#i hope one day we can get more content for psychonauts#maybe not more games but like a comic series or show or something would RULE#anyway don't repost without permission and if you do you're a fucking asshole and i hate you personally#[edit] like a true artist i forgot the fuckin stripes on dion's sleeves i'm going to go lay face down in a ditch
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